#NEXT GOAL is make him learn an instrument

[teamatsumu]

kinktober 2023 -> day 23

voyeurism - kageyama tobio x reader x oikawa tooru

word count: 1167

warnings: smut, fingering, swearing, slight humiliation

kinktober masterlist

Kageyama had known ever since Middle School that Oikawa was leagues above him in every sense.

He was a better volleyball player, and a better team player as well. He could work with people he didn’t like without letting it hinder the team play. He could set to anyone perfectly and make it seem effortless. His serves were miles above Kageyama’s in terms of power and control too. But none of that had ever upset Kageyama for too long. It was a motivator. Surpassing Oikawa had become his goal. And so he took Oikawa more as a teacher than as a rival.

Years later, it seemed Kageyama was still learning from his senpai, though now it was in fields other than volleyball.

“Pay attention, Tobio-chan.” Oikawa’s voice was as smooth and buttery as ever. “Don’t let your focus stray. I won’t help you over and over, y’know? My time is precious, after all.”

His words and tone were dismissive, but his actions stated otherwise. His posture was alert and present as he curled his torso over your back, one strong arm wrapped around your waist to hold you in place where you sat in his lap, caged by his legs, back to him. And his fingers were eager as they glided through the wetness between your legs, almost teasing as his fingertips tapped playfully at your clit, making you jump. Kageyama watched with interest at how you reacted to Oikawa’s touches, how any little brush on his hand would send your eyes rolling in your head or your mouth dropping open.

When Kageyama had mentioned over a regular dinner at your shared apartment that Oikawa would be coming over to show him how to properly have sex with you, you had choked on your bite and spent the next ten minutes wheezing and dry heaving over the sink while he patted your back, confused by how outrageous your reaction was. You had screamed at him in panic, asking him what the fuck was wrong with him, and had to sit him down and explain to him that this was not the way to improve your sex life.

“But Oikawa-san is better at it than me!” He had countered. “He always had a girlfriend in high school. And even now. He’s surrounded by girls-”

“Those are fangirls, Tobio!” You shrieked. “He’s not sleeping with all of them!”

“Regardless, I know he can help. He turned my life around with the advice he gave me in high school. I wouldn’t be the player I am without it.”

It had taken some convincing, and a few days of thinking on your part, but you had finally agreed after asking him a million times if he was sure he was okay with this. Kageyama was adamant he was, and he still stood by it. Watching this here, now, a small thrill ran down his torso and settled as a knot in his lower stomach. Made his dick twitch.

You whined when Oikawa put just the tip of his middle finger into your hole, swirling it a bit teasingly before pulling out again. Your legs were shaking with the effort of keeping them open, making sure Kageyama got a good view of what was happening between them. It was an order Oikawa had given you at the very start (‘Don’t you let those legs close, Y/N-chan. How can Tobio-chan learn when he can’t see what he’s supposed to be doing?’), and Kageyama marveled at the fact that you had yet to disobey him, no matter how hard it may seem for you to comply. You had submitted to Oikawa, in a way you had never submitted to him.

Kageyama didn’t take offense to it. As with volleyball, he shouldered responsibility for your reactions. If you were reacting this way to his senior but not him, he was obviously doing something wrong. And here he was, seated before you, watching your naked figure lean back on Oikawa, covered in a thin layer of sweat, eyes glistening with unshed tears as Oikawa teased you relentlessly, playing your body as if it were a string instrument. Kageyama licked his lips as he watched your juice wet his senpai’s fingers, wetter than he had ever seen you.

Your legs twitched and tensed when Oikawa finally slid a finger into your heat, a relieved sigh escaping you, hips pushing down on his hand insistently. Kageyama’s sharp eyes tracked every movement, comparing it to how you were with him, noting every difference and feeling amazed by the results.

“Oikawa-san,” you breathed, your tone pleading. “Please, more.”

You sounded so greedy. Kageyama’s dick gave a painful throb.

Oikawa hummed as if in thought. He had a sharp little smirk playing on his face, eyes moving from your heaving chest up to meet Kageyama’s, making him sit up a bit.

“What do you think, Tobio-chan? Should I give her more?”

Kageyama gulped. “Yes?”

Oikawa tutted. “Wrong answer.”

You let out a little sob at his words, one hand reaching to circle around Oikawa’s wrist. Oikawa made a warning sound.

“Hands off, princess. You know the rules.”

Your hands immediately shot away, twisting in the bedsheets under you instead. Your breaths were heavy, broken moans leaving your lips as Oikawa’s one finger worked inside you. Kageyama watched on with intrigue. One finger and you were already a mess. It usually took Kageyama much more. You had also obeyed Oikawa with little to no resistance when he had told you to keep your hands off him.

So much information. So much he could work with in the future.

Oikawa was watching him with sharp eyes, smirking as if he knew exactly what had clicked inside Kageyama. His arm around your waist tightened.

“It seems our little genius has made a mental breakthrough, Y/N-chan.” He drawled. “Which means you get to have a reward.”

You gasped when Oikawa sank another finger into your cunt and immediately started pumping them into you at a fast pace. Your back arched, legs separating more as if inviting him further in, eyes screwing shut as you cried through it. Kageyama watched with wide eyes, not blinking, not wanting to miss even a single thing. His breath seemed to be suspended in his throat, his mouth dry, dick so hard and throbbing it nearly made him black out, and when you screamed through your orgasm, gushing over his senpai’s fingers and shaking in his tight hold, Kageyama felt like one single touch on his own cock would make him cum on the spot too.

Your legs trembled and shook as you slumped back on Oikawa’s body, sighing in bliss as he cooed over you, careful hands running over your bare inner thighs as if to calm you down. Oikawa held up one finger, grinning over to where Kageyama sat, looking so wrecked it looked like he was the one doing all the work.

“That was lesson one. Let’s move on to the next one, shall we?”

Taglist:

@bxbyyyjocelyn @thisbicc @lazuliquartz @dreamayy @kuroosluthoe @true-form-hoe @akumakitsune21 @cham0mil3-and-h0n3y @samisfunky @universal-s1ut @msbyomimi @dohwaesu @leothesquishy @n0tmykays @tsukiran @reyofsunshinelol @bleach-your-panties @galaneiaeris @leyra-giovanni @erenspersonalwh0re @peachesncats s @soapsoftheworld @iwannabecamiloshovel @vintagevict0ria @smithieandy @moonlit-mizukage @snazzyturtles @argwein

A/N: For those whose tags arent working, im sorry! I tried and for some reason, your names wont show up in the mentions :( another way of being notified is to turn on my blog notifs for @teamatsumufics . I only reblog my fics there so it serves almost like being in a taglist!

[anvilsims]

Been working on this for a long long time and I finally reached a point that I'm happy with it. I hope Simmers who are also big Nintendo fans like this.

Shout-out to @tomatomagica/@sims4niya for helping me out with making certain goals and just looking over the rules in general. :)

UPDATE: Slightly changed the goals in Gen 8, please reblog this version.

General Rules:

No cheats unless otherwise stated in generation rules, needed to reset a sim, or for decoration/building purposes.

Mods are okay, provided they do not give you an unfair advantage. What constitutes an unfair advantage is up to you.

Complete each generation's Aspiration

Above all, have fun. If that means continuing onto the next generation without finishing all of the previous gen goals, that’s okay.

(Generations beyond the cut)

Generation 1 Animal Crossing:

Traits: Loves Outdoors/Outgoing/Maker

Aspiration: Curator

You have moved into a new town with nothing but the clothes on your back. Well at least Mr. Nook was nice enough to give you a new home even with the work you'll have to do to pay him off. It’ll be tough but you’ve quite the knack for building and your neighbors seem more than happy to cheer you on.

Move into an empty lot and build a small house. (Optional: Make your house a Tiny Home Residential lot and choose what tier to work with from there.)

After one day, move two single townie sims into your neighborhood and become friends with them (If one of them becomes your founder’s spouse, make a new neighbor to move into their old house.)

Neither the founder nor spouse will hold a job, they will make money via at home activities like painting, fishing, etc.

Have a room to display your collections

At the end of every sim week, use cheats or mods to remove half of your household funds (to pay off your debt to Mr. Nook) until both your sim and their spouse reach the adult stage.

~~~

Generation 2 Splatoon: 

Traits: Creative/Dance Machine/Party Animal

Aspiration: Famous Celebrity 

Despite your humble beginnings, you always dreamed big. You were often found drawing outfits from fashion magazines or singing along to your favorite pop idols or doing cool poses for selfies at the pool. Once you became a teen, you started taking little steps to join that glamorous world.

Become a simfluencer as a teen

Move to San Myshuno or Del Sol Valley once you become a Young Adult

Reach the top of the Style Influencer career (Trendsetter branch)

Host a party once every sim week

Either become or marry a merperson. Heir however must be just a sim.

Max out painting, dancing, and singing skills

~~~

Generation 3 Legend of Zelda:

Traits: Good/Adventurous/Music Lover

Aspiration: Jungle Explorer

Everyone expected you to become a spoiled brat but thankfully you turned out to be a good kid with a love for music and a dream of exploring far-off ancient ruins. You make a friend who supports you all the way but you also make an enemy constantly getting in your way.

Make a friend as a child or teen, become BFFs with them, and stay that way for as long as either sim lives (friend can be a future spouse) 

As a child or teen become enemies with one sim and stay enemies for as long as either sim lives. Win at least five fights with them. (Optional: Have this sim be an evil sim)

Max out the Archaeology skill and one instrument skill

Complete the Ancient Omiscan Artifacts Collection

Get the “Brave” reward trait

~~~

Generation 4 Earthbound: 

Traits: Goofball/Active/Geek

Aspiration: Friend of the World

Because of your parent’s travels, you never lived in one spot for too long. Despite that, you still liked making new friends and finding ways to keep in touch. And you learned to appreciate the magic in every world… figurative and literal.

Live in four different worlds before becoming a young adult

Make three friends and create a club with them (Optional: Make these friends as a child and grow up together)

Max out photography and comedy skills

Become a spellcaster as a teen and work on reaching the top rank

Complete the Postcard Collection

Adopt a dog when your first kid becomes a child

~~~

Generation 5 Pokemon:

Traits: Dog (or Cat) Lover (Animal Enthusiast)/Vegetarian/Socially Awkward

Aspiration: Friend of the Animals or Country Caretaker

Ever since you were little, you were obsessed with animals and even got along better with them than people. Your friends blame your childhood obsession with Voidcritters (even if some of them weren't really animals). When you grew up, you knew you were going to surround yourself with animals.

Complete the Voidcritters Collection

Adopt at least eight pets over your lifetime including at least one stray.

Have both cats and dogs

Open a Vet Clinic (pokemon center) and get it to five stars

Max out Veterinary and pet training skills

OR

Complete Voidcritters Collection

Adopt a fox or raccoon

Have at least one of each farm animal (chickens, cow, and llamas)

Win first place in each animal fair in Henford-On-Bagley

Learn all the animal treat recipes

~~~

Generation 6 Mario:

Heir 1 Traits: Family Oriented/Bro/Loyal

Heir 2 Traits: Squeamish/Clumsy/Bro

Heir 1 Aspiration: Nerd Brain

Heir 2 Aspiration: Mansion Baron

You and your sibling were as thick as thieves growing up and neither of you really liked the idea of one of you moving away so they stuck around. But that doesn’t mean they don’t have their own adventures.

Chose two siblings to serve as Double Heirs, they do not need to be twins

Both heirs take a part time job as Manual Laborers until one of them gets married then the married one joins the Doctor career

The other heir maxes out the Medium skill and becomes a Paranormal Investigator

Both heirs max out Handiness skill

One heir unlocks Sylvan Glade and the other unlocks Forgotten Grotto

~~~

Generation 7 Kirby:

Traits: Foodie (or Glutton)/Cheerful/Childish

Aspiration: Renaissance Sim

You grew up in a very supportive environment with family members encouraging you to try a little bit of everything. You liked helping your family cook but you also discovered a love for acting from trying so many different hats. At that point, you decided that you were gonna be a superstar!

Join Drama Club as a child or teen

Max out the Cooking, Gourmet Cooking, and acting skills

Reach the top of the Actor career

Reach pristine public image

Gain the People Person lifestyle

Once you become an elder, retire from acting and open a business selling cooked meals.

~~~

Generation 8 Metroid: 

Traits: Loner/Unflirty/Noncommittal

Aspiration: Strangerville Mystery

While your parent enjoyed the spotlight, you preferred to keep to yourself with exercising and star gazing. As soon as you were able to, you moved out into your own place in a quiet out of the way town called Strangerville. However it seems your wish for a normal quiet life wasn’t meant to be.

Max out body and wellness skills

Reach the sixth level of the Astronaut career and quit after one shift.

Only take odd jobs after quitting your career

Have an alien child (feel free to cheat/mod to get an abduction or to get a female sim alien pregnant)

Gain the Techie lifestyle

Never marry

~~~

Generation 9 Pikmin:

Traits: Hot headed/Overachiever/Genius

Aspiration: Freelance Botanist

Despite your alien heritage, you adored the world you grew up in but that isn’t to say you had no interest in the stars. You enjoyed helping out at the school greenhouse along with watching for comets and UFOs on weekends. It didn’t take long before you started to wonder if there was a way to combine your love for both worlds.

Join Scouts as a child

Master gardening and rocket science skills

Visit Sixam and befriend three different colored aliens

Complete the Geode and Space rock collections 

Find all three alien plants on Sixam and plant them in your garden (Do NOT buy them in Henford-On-Bagley)

~~~

Generation 10 Fire Emblem:

Traits: Bookworm/Proper/Ambitious

Aspiration: Leader of the Pack 

Growing up, you admired stories of brave knights and kind heroes. While you eventually outgrew the fairy tales, you still wanted to help people like the brave hero kings and queens in the stories.Thus together with your closest friends, you decide to try to make a positive difference in the world.

If a sim dies, you cannot plead with the Grim Reaper nor can you resurrect them in any way

Max out Charisma, writing, and research & debate skills 

Reach the top of the Political Career (Politician branch)

Form a club (forming an army) and eventually build up to recruiting eight members

Marry a member of your club (and if they aren’t already, have them join the military career)

Write a Bestseller Fantasy book

If you give the challenge a shot, either @ me or tag "NintendoLegacyChallenge"

[thegirlwhorideslikeasamurai]

Yuri on Ice aka Yuuri's free programme would never have been possible without the beach scene.

In the beach scene, Yuuri opens up to Viktor for the first time. While they have been unintentionally working against each other until that point (exuberant flirting from Viktor and Yuuri trying to avoid him), the conversation on the beach brought them on the same page. That conversation has reassured Yuuri that Viktor's motives and feelings towards him are sincere and he starts feeling safe enough to open up.

Which leads right to the next scene where Yuuri sits in his room and decides to open up more as he contacts the music student who composed the programme his former coach Celestino rejected.

Now fast-forward to Yuuri and Viktor creating Yuuri's new free programme:

Yuuri's free programme is about his skating career. But it's so much more than that. Yuri on Ice also tells the story of Yuuri and Viktor, expressed through the piano (Yuuri) and the violin (Viktor). At 0:55 min, which is quite early in the programme, the violin joins and it dominates the song. This part represents Viktor becoming his coach. (The entire song is 3:41 min, note that a free programme was 4:30 min at the time YOI aired, and that the creators shortened the songs due to time constraints).

Yes, that's right: Most of the story told in Yuuri's free programme, Viktor is Yuuri's coach. Yuuri's programme that is supposed to be about his life as a skater paraphrases his entire career so far in 55 seconds and then tells the story of Yuuri and Viktor.

Then there's this part in the middle where the violin falls silent and the piano slows down as Yuuri has a realisation about love. When the music picks up speed again, the violin re-joins, but instead of doing its own thing now it's support the piano, which can be interpreted as Yuuri and Viktor now being a team, Yuuri and Viktor being lovers (hence, the realisation about love), Yuuri and Viktor staying together (the instruments playing together until the end, these a nuance of Stammi Vicino in that imagery). To be precise, there are many interpretations as this song can be applied to every episode where Yuuri skates it.

Now, as Viktor is Yuuri's coach and choreographer, Yuuri needs to explain to him what he wants to express with this song, so that Viktor can turn this into choreography. Yuuri needs to explain what the instruments mean and how this translates into his story. I can only imagine how embarrassing this must have been for him, even though he has already decided to open up more--it's still an effort he must do and which will become easier the more often he does it. But that first time when he had to explain all this to Viktor, yes that must have been super awkward. He might have tried to water down some parts of the story because he couldn't voice them at this time, then, as Viktor kept prying because it didn't seem to fit the music, gradually had to disclose more.

And Yuuri had to explain all of this to that music student as well so that she could compose the song accordingly, and he had to do this AFTER that first awkward experience when he commissioned a song that got shelved.

Without Yuuri realising that opening up isn't a bad thing, that it's okay to make yourself vulnerable to people who don't judge you and don't see you as weak, nothing of this would have ever happened. Yuuri learning that Viktor is a safe person to be vulnerable with because Viktor is dedicated to give Yuuri his full support and that his goal isn't to get Yuuri laid but that his feelings for Yuuri are of a serious nature ("that's my way of showing my love"), is the start of Yuuri becoming confident and that enables him to create not just his first free programme on his own but a free programme that expresses the different kinds of love he is feeling, most of all his love for Viktor.

If you enjoy my meta posts, please consider giving my blog a follow or checking out my works on AO3 (link in bio). You will find the results of my meta musings in there!

[kiruamon]

What the heart desires AU - Introduction

For everyone who maybe wants some more context for the au the explanation story starts after the first two sketches.

For you, music has always been like breathing. It felt so natural to have it in your life that you never questioned your love for it. Simply cherishing its existence with all your heart. You could still remember the time when, as a child, your little hands felt far too small for the many keys of your uncle's old piano, when he let you sit next to him while he played some of his favorite pieces. Sometimes you think you spent more time at his place rather than at home or with friends. Going through his books with all those notes that at first had felt like seeing a secret code, whispering to you to find out it's hidden meaning. Had it been anyone else, you might have wondered if your constant presence was bothersome. But now you believe that your uncle must have enjoyed having you around. To share his passion, even if you were just a little rascal and certainly not someone to have deep meaningful conversations with. And yet, whatever silly question had come to your mind and left your mouth, he would answer it for you in a way that even a child could understand. He was the one who told you how to read the notes - the secret code - in his books. How to move your fingers on the keys. Guiding you without pushing you and letting you just explore and enjoy your journey that took you deeper and deeper into this world of tunes and melodies with each year.

It had been heartbreaking when he passed away. Leaving you with his last gift. One you could never be grateful enough for as he left you his house with everything in it. Over the years, you have made the place more and more your own, while still leaving some things untouched, simply because they felt too nostalgic in a way that was comforting. It would feel… wrong to replace the old shelves full of sheet music and records in the study with different ones.

While your passion for music had simply grown, it wasn't too surprising when you made it into more than a hobby. It wasn't always easy. But you were certainly happy when you reached the point in your life where you could afford to live from what you loved so much. It wasn't so much about being heard or having a big audience. You just loved what you were doing and that was it. To put your very own feelings into each and every tune.

You never thought about what it would be like if you were unable to play again. To sit there in front of the row of black and white keys and not be able to lure out the melodies that resonated in your heart. But after the accident, your fingers were so stiff that it was frustrating to say the least. It was like seeing the goal right before you, but being unable to reach it since the doctors had explained to you that there was no way to fully recover your old flexibility.

Of course, you knew that it wasn't the end of the world per se, even though it felt disheartening. You could still enjoy music by listening to it. Make up your own tunes. Surely you could learn to compose with the help of a computer if you tried. But you missed playing yourself. It was different to play on a real instrument. And you felt sorry for not being able to use your old friend anymore. To fill the living room with whatever melody were resting in your heart and mind.

Truth be told, you were already at the point where you considered maybe trying to learn to play the piano with your feet, as your life once again took a… very curious turn of events. You had just finished preparing your afternoon tea when you heard the doorbell ring. Could be the mailman, was your first thought as you put down your cup and went out of the room to open the door. Only to find that it was definitely not the mailmen. The figures in front of you, towered tall in your doorframe. A smug grin plastered on their oddly shaped faces, revealing teeth that looked more like fangs to you than it would be normal for a human. Well… not that the two suspicious fellows in front of you looked much like humans to begin with. Horns, tails, their fingertips resembling claws. As silly as the thought seemed, the word demon popped into your head.

"Congratulations, Shooting Star! It's your lucky day. Since we have decided to give you the chance to become one of our costumers. All we need is a tiny bit of your time," said the figure on the left. Bright blue eyes on a yellow face, checking you out as if he was a cat and you his next meal, while his voice still sounded all smooth and friendly as if he was putting some extra effort into making it sound as unthreatening as possible. "We'll make it worth your while," a second voice chimed in. Sounding somewhat calmer than the energetic one of the yellow fellow with the two horns as two pairs of eyes were now directed at you.

You blinked. Finally feeling yourself able to move again. The stiff fingers of your right hand still curled around the doorknob, which you slammed shut tight the next moment. "Sorry, I'm not buying anything," you found yourself shouting through the closed door. Not sure what to do. Call the police? Or an exorcist? A priest? Or are you just seeing things? And what the hell would they even want from you? Was this some kind of Grim Reaper thing? Where you close to death and they had come to take you with them? Was that even how it worked? You still felt pretty much alive and well after all. Maybe it was just a very elaborate PR-promo of some company trying to sell some Halloween-themed items? At least it sounded more reasonable than the demon theory.

"Hey! Wait! Don't treat us like we are trying to sell you a cheap vacuum cleaner," you heard a desperate plead from the other side of your door. You thought it was the voice of the yellow-faced one. "Sun, stop it… You sound like a whining child." The comment was swiftly followed by an offended gasp. "What? I am not!" "Sheesh… just let me handle this." Before you knew it, you found yourself chuckling quietly at the ongoing conversation outside. Could those guys really be demons? Maybe they were just some weirdos in very good costumes. Well… for some obscure reason, you found yourself not feeling so scared anymore. After all, it wasn't like they tried tearing down your door or anything crazy like that.

You carefully leaned your back against the heavy door. Allowing yourself to relax a little. "You should at least hear us out." Another attempt from outside. "Wouldn't you like to have your old life back? We can help with that." The implication of these words caught you by surprise. How did they… You can't help as to feel curious. Even if it might just be a trick to get you to listen to them. But it is one that works.

"Is it true? Can you really help me?" you ask. The door wide open again. Your eyes look up into the faces of the two guys in front of you. You see a dark glint in their eyes. Sparkling with satisfaction. "Piqued your interest, didn't we?" the one with the nightcap chuckles. A wry smile on his lips. Knowing full well that he has gotten through to you. "How about letting us in so we can have a nice little talk with each other?"

That was pretty much how you ended up sitting at your coffee table with two demons. Providing them each with a cup of tea as you were sitting in the armchair facing the couch on which they had settled down. Now that you'd had time to give them a closer look, you were convinced that they weren't just some guys in costumes. The proportions of these two wouldn't allow anyone to hide inside. You still feel a bit as if having a fever dream though. But you decided to just roll with it. "So…" you start, unsure of what to say as you place your hands in your lap. "…you two are… ?" you let the words hang in the air between the three of you. And thankfully, the lanky yellow one, who had let himself flop down into the large cushions of the backrest with one leg crossed over the other, is taking you up on your question.

"Exactly what you think we are," he says, his left arm resting on the backrest behind him. It gives him a rather casual, yet slightly dignified appearance in his form-fitting long red and black coat. If you had tried to sit like that, it would have come off as lazy. His right hand comes up, waving lightly through the air as he goes on, while your eyes can't help but stare at the sharp looking fingertips of his. They look like they could do some serious damage if they cut through anything other than air. "But let me introduce ourselves to you," he continues as the star shaped tip of his tail gently taps against the couch. "I am Sun. And this here to my left is my dear brother… " "Moon," the one you called Nightcap in your head finishes. Moon. Your eyes wander to him. You take in his face, which, with its darker right side and paler left, reminds you of a crescent moon. Unlike his brother Sun, you can only spot a single horn on his head. It's… funny. How they look alike and not at the same time. But yes, now that they have told you that they are brothers, it is hard not to see the resemblance.

"It's, uh… nice to meet you?" Hmm, not your best delivery. But you are still a bit unsure of what to make of all this. They don't seem too offended by your reaction. A small chuckle even leaves Moon's mouth before he brings the cup in his hands up to take a sip. "What a very polite one you are." His eyes almost seem to glint as he speaks to you, though it was hard to tell in the bright daylight streaming in through the window.

"Let me assure you, we are only here to offer our most sincere assistance to you," Moon continued. Suuuure… because demons were really well known for being all benevolent when it came to such things. Your knowledge might only come from movies and books, which certainly wasn't the best source to rely on, but your instincts were also telling you to better not take every word of theirs for granted. And yet… at least you wanted to hear them out. Not that you had much of a choice now that they were inside your house anyway.

You hummed nervously in thought. Considering his offer again, you looked down at your hands. Feeling the stiffness in your fingers more than ever in this very moment. Calm down. It wouldn't hurt to ask. You just had to be careful. "What exactly does it mean when you say you can help me? That I could get my old life back?"

The moment you ask, you can see their eyes lightening up even more. A hint of excitement in them that Moon knows better to hide as Sun does. But even Moon gets betrayed by the light flicker of his own tail as the crescent-shaped end swishes through the air like the pendulum of a metronome. "I am so glad you ask. Please, let me explain. Even though it is very, very simple. Even a human like you will be able to understand without any problems," Sun has taken over the conversation once more, which doesn't seem to bother his brother. With a grand gesture and in one single smooth movement, he stands up. Posing like an actor on a stage. Looking proud and as if he had been waiting for this moment to finally come. Which you didn't doubt was pretty close to the truth.

It's hard to not feel a tad amused despite the nature of this whole situation. For demons these two surely were… very different than anything you ever pictured those beings would be or act like. "In that case, please go on," you offer him politely, holding back a chuckle as you feel your shoulders relax more. You even reach for your own cup of tea. Making sure your fingers have a good grip on it before you lift it and take a sip while hearing him out.

Sun has set himself in motion. With two long steps, he walks around the table to stand closer to the patch of sunlight coming through the window, as if to set the stage for his 'great' explanation. "You see, me and my dear brother here have the power to grant you your heart's deepest desire. You want fame? To be back on stage? To be the one who comes up with tunes that can sway the hearts of billions? To be loved? Or maybe you want a body that never falls ill again? Which isn't as fragile as your current one? Whatever it may be. We can fulfill it for you. And all you have to do is make a tiny little deal with us."

That sounded… like a total scam. Never trust anything that sounds too good to be true, your mother had always told you when you were young. That, and not to trust TV commercials. But for now, you decided to amuse them to find out more. After all, you felt there was still some information missing. "A deal?" you asked Sun, who was watching you with the hungry eyes of a predator.

"Oh. Nothing big," he replies as if it wasn't anything too upsetting, while he slowly moved closer towards you. Letting you feel even smaller this time, when sitting there in your armchair and with him towering over you at full size. "You see. In exchange for your wish to come true, we need a little compensation. It's only fair. Something that would be considered an adequate exchange." Yeah… you kind of have a bad feeling by now. With how his blue eyes are piercing right through you. "And what would be considered… as something adequate?"

"Your soul, for example." Your… soul? You blink up at him. Well… that sounded very clichéd, you had to admit. And also interesting. So souls did exist? "You want my soul?" Sun grins, slowly backing away from you again as he straightens up and takes a step back. He puts one arm in front of his chest, while the elbow of the other rests on top of it. His index tipping lightly against his chin. "It is a very good deal. I doubt you will find a better one anywhere else," he says amused.

"But isn't a soul something that's really important?" you ask, a bit stunned. "It's not like you humans really know what to do with it anyway or do you?" Hearing Moon's calm but teasing voice suddenly right next to your ear, makes you almost spill your tea. You find yourself faced with a thin, playful grin when turning your head around. His arms are resting on the back of the chair as he looks down at you from behind it. When had he moved over here?

It takes you a moment to shake off your stupor. Well, perhaps he has a point. You are not sure what a soul is for. But… that doesn't mean it couldn't be a very important part of you to function, right? Similarly, if you didn't know how every little part in a car worked, you wouldn't just shrug it off if something was missing from the engine. You put the back of your head against the back of the armchair. Looking at Moon and Sun as you think about what to say. "It is true. I don't know anything about souls. But… I feel like this wouldn't be a very good deal." You feel nervous speaking so openly with them. Will they be angry now? Will they pressure you into giving in? But there is not anger in their eyes as they look down on you.

"Not a good deal, you say?" You feel how Moon shifts his weight. Reaching down for your hands that are holding much too tightly on to your cup. His clawed fingers work with great caution as they loosen your grip to take the cup away from you. He hands it to Sun before lifting your hand with his own to take a closer look. "Is it not your greatest desire to use these here again for what they were meant to do?" You feel called out. But still… that wasn't… it wasn't enough of a reason to give away your soul, was it? You can't help but look at your hand. Resting there in his. Being confronted once more with thoughts of what could have been, if they would fully work again. A deep sigh leaves your lips. Before you slowly pull your hand away, finding that he doesn't try to stop you from doing so. Of course you would love to play once more. To be able to fill the living room again with your own melodies.

But the risk simply seems too high. And you didn't want to end up with losing something that might be just as important as your hands. "Sorry. But I think it's not a very equal exchange. After all, even if I can't play with my hands anymore, it's not like my life is over. I can still enjoy music. I can still compose. And I don't really care for any extras like the whole becoming famous part. If we were talking about you wanting my voice that would be different, but I don't feel comfortable with giving away my soul," you admit with a sheepish smile on your lips. The silence that follows your words is a bit awkward and you are actually thankful when Moon breaks it.

"Hmmm… so you would consider your voice a fairer price if it meant your fingers could be restored?" Moon eyes you thoughtfully. As if he is taking your words seriously. "Moon! You are not actually considering such a half-baked deal, are you?" Sun sounds a bit more baffled by his brother's reaction. And you can see the two of them exchanging silent glances with each other. As if having a conversation that you are not able to hear since none of them is saying a word. You can't read much in Moon's face. But with Sun it's different. Disbelief and slight irritation turn to curiosity when he tilts his head before a smirk crosses his face. "You might be right," Sun says after a moment. Bringing his attention back to you. "Oh, you are such a lucky little human. We are willing to make a deal with you on your terms, my dear. Isn't that nice of us?"

Wait… what? His bright, fanged grin startles you less than his words. "My… my terms?" "Mhm. We will take your little voice and in exchange your hands and fingers will be as good as new." "Or is that still not good enough, even though you said so yourself?" Moon questions you, although it seems to be more rhetorical. As if he already knows your answer. And… this time he isn't that wrong about it. You find yourself actually willing to give in.

To give up your voice for the chance to play the piano again. The one thing you do actually want. For a price whose consequences you can understand much better. "No! I mean… yes… I think that would be fine for me."

So a few minutes ahead, you found yourself signing up a contract with two demons. Of course, after making sure there wasn't any hidden fine print in it - there wasn't - before you put your name on it. The process of signing the contract itself was surprisingly tame. There wasn't even the need for blood to seal the deal. No flickering lights or other creepy omens.

Moon and Sun seemed pleased when they read your signature, before Sun let the contract disappear with a little wave of his left hand that reminded you of those magicians from the shows you sometimes saw on TV as a kid.

"So. Any last words you want to say?" Sun asks you teasingly. Which could have sounded like a threat, if it wasn't for the fact that they would take your voice - and as they had promised you, this would happen without harming you in any way. So you felt only slightly nervous as you thought about it. "Oh, right. I guess it is the last chance for that, isn't it? So… uhm… thank you. Both of you," you find yourself smiling like an idiot. A bit too excited perhaps for someone who was about to lose their voice. But you don't care. Not when you know what you will gain for it instead. "O-okay. I'm ready. We can start."

"Good. Then just stay still and let us do the rest, Shooting Star." Each of the two took one of your hands into theirs. Holding them with great gentleness as if they were tiny little birds. You still remember how you heard them chanting something in a foreign language. How their voices had sounded when they built up to a harmony as they had fallen in sync with each other. The whole process couldn't have lasted much longer than a minute, but it felt longer. As if time had been stretched in some strange way. A shiver ran through your body. Building up to an ice-cold feeling in your throat as your fingers had clumsily tried to hold on to Sun and Moon's hands, whose fingers had curled around your own. And then it simply had been over. Just like that. No more chanting. The odd feeling gone as you looked at them. You were trying to say something only to find yourself unable to. Your voice was truly gone. Which, despite the fact that you knew it was going to happen, was only now really starting to sink in. It had worked… so… did that mean?

"Speechless?" Sun jested as he let out a little laugh. Lifting your left hand up and giving it free. The action mirrowed by his brother Moon. "You should give them a try, don't you think?" Moon looked at you. Waiting. You felt your heart leap as you slipped out of their grasp. Staring at your fingers in disbelief before swallowing the fear and doubt of what if it hadn't worked. Slowly you start moving your fingers. Stretching them. Wiggling them in every possible direction, one after the other, like you hadn't been able to since the accident. You almost cried as they moved again with such ease. They were doing exactly what you wanted them to do. You could play again! Gosh… you really didn't have to give up your love for the piano.

It was hard to tear off your eyes from your hands in order to look at Sun and Moon with an immense joy. Even if you couldn't voice it anymore. "I assume the outcome matches what you have wished for?" You nod your head at Moon's question eagerly. Giving the two of them each a thumbs up. It's hard to stop smiling like an idiot as you grin from ear to ear, which seems to amuse them. "Very well. In that case, we will take our leave. We still have other places to be. Take good care of yourself, little human." "Maybe we will check in on you another time. Just to make sure, you are doing well, Shooting Star," Sun says with a big grin as his tail bobs up and down.

You escort them back to the door. Waving at the entrance of your home as the two demons already make their way to the sidewalk. Actually, you are not minding the idea too much to maybe see them again sometime after what they had done for you today.

-

"Do you think it will work?" Sun throws a questioning look at Moon. Even though he had agreed to go along with his brother's plan. "Just give it some time. They will soon miss their silly little voice. And then they will beg us to get it back." There is no doubt in Moon's voice. A mischievous grin on his face. Pleased with his own plan that could be nothing else than absolutely foolproof. "And when they do so... " "They will have to give us their soul to get it back," Sun finishes his sentence with a chuckle. "How long do you give them, Moonie?" "A naive little thing like them? Two weeks at most."

-

How? How in the name of the damned could you be so content with your current life? He had given you two weeks at max. And yet, even after three months, you still hadn't changed your mind in the slightest. Three months in which his patience was running thin. Three months consisting of visiting you multiple times a week to see if you felt the tiniest bit inconvenienced by your lack of voice. But no! Nothing! Instead, you used a stupid text-to-speech app on your phone or scribbled your answers in a notebook for him and Sun to read. And you even had started visiting a class to learn sign language. It was beyond him how you could be so happy with your new life. He let out a huff as he sat next to Sun in your living room that had grown much too familiar to them. The smell of freshly baked cookies hit his nose as he glanced at his brother who already helped himself to the baked goods while you filled their cups with some hot tea like the good host you always were. "Moon. Relax." Relax? How should he relax when they hadn't made even the tiniest bit of progress in three damn months? He throws a warning glance at Sun. Keeping his voice low so you wouldn't catch onto their conversation. "If you tell me to relax one more time, I swear I will strangle you." Was he being unfair and moody? Yes. But he didn't get how Sun could care so less over how slowly things progressed. "I think you are forgetting that we don't come here just so you can stuff yourself with cookies." Sun paused at that. Looking at third chocolat chip cookie he already had taken a bite off before avoiding Moon's stern gaze as if feeling called out and somewhat flustered before trying to regain his composure. "D-don't be silly, Moonie. Of course I know. But I fear, we are stuck in a long game now. And I am working very hard right now." Hard working? That's what he called this? "... eating cookies and sipping tea is not hard work Sun... ," he grumbled annoyed. "That's where you are wrong. I am building up trust with our little Shooting Star. And in doing so I will surely unravel another weakness or desire of theirs for us to use." Hmph... Sun better wasn't making that up. Because, he didn't felt fully convinced whenever seeing his brother's eyes spark up like a child's when there were some homemade sweets on the table.

- "Is everything alright? Anything I can get you two?" The artifical voice was coming from your phone after you had entered your question in the app and clicked on it to read the text out loud. With an innocent smile you looked at Sun and Moon. You don't think they have been aware how their conversation had stopped to be just a whispered back and forth between them shortly after it had started. So... you kind of have heard most of it even when you pretended that you didn't. After all... you pretty much enjoyed their visits that had become such a constant of your life. Their silly bickering and plans to get your soul never failed to brighten up your day. Sun's happy face when he was nibbeling on a cookie or piece of cake. Moon's mostly calm but sometimes grumpy scowls. It all made your house feel so much more lively. And you found yourself wishing for those days to never end.

- Ooooooooookay. That was the introduction part for this au. But, but, but, but, buuuuuut you get two more random, little bonus stories and sketches from this au. One for each of the boys. So please enjoy:

He was right above you. Pinning you down with his hands and knees between him and the couch. You felt trapped and guessed it was pretty much what he wanted to achieve. His thin neck was bent so that his face was close to yours as Sun's pretty blue eyes stared right into yours. His white and slitted, cat-like pupils still fascinated you whenever you saw them, and you murmured a silent pretty under your breath. "Hm? Did you say something?" he teased you with a grin. You doubted he knew exactly what you had said, and he confirmed your hunch right the next second. "Maybe asking me to stop? Too bad you dropped your phone so you can't tell me, hm?" Sun was clearly having his fun with you.

And honestly, you didn't minded the situation you were in too much. Although you weren't sure if he was trying to make you feel uneasy or straight up flirted with you. Perhaps both? You tried to keep a straight face for the moment. Not to grin, not to let your true feelings betray you. A clawed hand lifted your chin rather gently. "You have been veeeeery stubborn lately, Little Star. Declining all the things we offered you for your little soul. And yet nothing seems to catch your interest. But no human can always be satisfied. Your kind tends to constantly desire something."

You simply shrug your shoulders at his comment. "Pfffh, don't give me a 'I don't know'. Fixing your hands can't be the only thing you wanted in your life." Well, sure. But everything else isn't really something worth trading your soul for you thought. "I wonder what desire will bloom next in that heart of yours." Okay, now you do crack a tiny smile. It's funny how none of them seemed to have catched on to what you recently felt for these silly guys. You are staring right at him as you raise your hands to his face. Playfully you tug on one of his triangular rays, which causes him to fall completely silent. Sun looks down at you as a hint of red appears on his cheeks. "W-what do you think you a-are doing?" How cute. You chuckle without creating a single noise and gaze at him with an amused but tender expression. Your hand wanders further up until you are able to give him a few soft pats on the head, right between his horns, which only seems to irritate him more.

"H-hey! Quit it! I-I'm not a dog!" he complains with a half-hearted snarl. Well, that is true. Perhaps you should make it up to him. You pause for a moment to consider your next action. And then you curl your fingers carefully around his horns to pull him closer down towards you. "H-hey. I said to stop your foolery or… or I… " He falls dead silent when you place a small peck on his forehead. Sun doesn't move at all. Making you almost worry that you might have ended up breaking him by accident. But then you see a bright flickering glow coming from the tip of his tail behind him. Huh… maybe he just really liked it? Sun is still half frozen in place from the audacity of your actions. His blue eyes are wide open in shock as his yellow face turns even redder from the evident blush on it. His mouth opens and closes a few times as he pulls his head a bit up again. He looks so flustered and yet… there is a gleam in his eyes as he slowly inches closer. Looking as if he is about to kiss you any given moment.

He is only inches away when you see a shadow behind him. A hand grabs him by the back of his collar and pulls him away from you. "Sun! God dammit. Can't I let you two out of my sight for two minutes?" Moon throws an annoyed look at Sun and then down at you. "I swear, you two are worse than a couple of lovesick teenagers." You feel your ears warm up a tad at that remark, but you can't help yourself as you grin from ear to ear like a fool. "I was just trying to tempt the human into giving us their soul! I would never fall for them," Sun utters his excuse a touch too fast, as his voice climbs up a few pitches. It sounds not very convincing at all. "Urgh. Sure," Moon says with a deep, troubled sigh, as if he was bothered to be stuck here all alone with you two idiots. "And you," he says as he looks at you once more with a firm expression on his red and white eyes. "Stop teasing my brother. You are just making it worse."

Second bonus Story:

"How can someone lack any sense of self-preservation? It's frustrating, to say the least." Moon scolded you. Holding one hand over your face. Covering up your eyes with his large hand. Your not sure why but his odd metal-like skin always felt a little more chilly than Sun's. And yet his touch was as careful as one could be. Overly gentle as the tips of his claws rested against your soft human skin. As long as you held still, you knew you wouldn't end up with any scratches, even if he sounded all grumpy he rarely raised his voice ever.

"We are demons. Actual demons. If you toy around with us, we might forget our manners." Sometimes it's hard to tell if he's worried about you or just annoyed at how casual you interact with them. You know you have grown bolder with time. Pretending the affection you show them sometimes is just a way to tease them when it's actually the other way around. But honestly, you can't help it. And you can't help thinking that Moon as well as Sun have both become rather dear to you. Both of them holding a special place in your heart. Not that you have let them know or will so anytime soon. You lift your hands. Giving his arm a soft tap with your fingers to catch his attention.

"Hm? What is it?" Ah, seems like that had done the trick. You start slowly signing a few words. Hoping he might be able to tell them apart, even with the odd angle he has to look at them. Good that Moon and Sun are both very fluid in all kinds of languages. Including this one. "Urgh. Of course you would say that," he grumbles and it makes you chuckle a bit, even though no sound leaves your lips. You open your eyes. Trying to catch a glimpse of his face through the narrow gaps between his fingers, but instead you get a soft smack against your forehead, which only makes you laugh even more. "Don't laugh! I really should set your head straight. Something is clearly wrong in there. Seriously… you are… so… ," he falls silent and you wonder why. When you try to grab his hand to shove it away, he only presses it closer against your eyes. "…don't look. Not yet," he says, his voice usually so calm and collected carrying a hint of embarrassment, so you just let your fingers rest on the back of his hand as you close your eyes again. You don't mind letting the moment play out a little longer as you listen to the sound of your fluttering heart that tells you how much you love them both. -

So. That's mostly it! Just have a random fun headcanon-fact here at the end: Y/N will refer to Sun and Moon sometimes as his 'Silly Goose Boys' as time progresses. Mostly for all their shenanigans and because of their bendy/flexible long necks.

I hope whoever made it til here had fun with this post.

[humbledragon669]

S2E1 - The Arrival Write Up P7 - the Present Day from Crowley’s departure from the bookshop to his return to it

Let’s see if we can plough through this next section to take us up to the Apology Dance, shall we? Because that seems like a pretty decent place to place a marker and hopefully finish up the episode from there.

There are some minor points I want to pick up on in the scene depicting Crowley’s departure from Soho, largely around this line of script:

CROWLEY: Just breathe, that’s what humans do. Then they count to ten before they do anything stupid.

Perhaps he just says this because it’s something that he’s learned about humans during his time on Earth, but I find this one interesting because it surfaces the possibility that he consciously engages in actions that would make him more humanlike. We saw quite a bit of symbolism in the first season to suggest that his non-physical assets (morals, ethics, emotions, etc.) were more closely aligned with human values, but I don’t think that was a conscious decision on his behalf. The soundtrack gives us some extra layering here in the reflexive growls emanating from the demon, which are distinctly not humanlike, but clearly not something he’s really able to control. And talking of doing things that are not in his control, his anger is having quite the effect on the area around him – check out the sky in the background here:

The whole sky (which, prior to his entry into the bookshop, was clear and bright blue) is filled with rolling, red-tinted clouds. The light in the whole street has darkened and developed that same red tinge. This is quite the tantrum! I do love the fact that he’s so furious he can’t even perform the act that’s supposed to be calming him down (counting) but seems to feel the need to include a token element of his attempted actions by simply screaming the goal number as he reigns unholy fire into the street. I don’t think I’ve ever been so angry after an argument with a friend that I feel like I could have invoked this atmospheric change. My husband on the other hand…

Possible Easter egg in this scene – the music playing in the coffee shop as Maggie and Nina watch Crowley smoking outside has reverted to Bohemian Rhapsody. Here are the lyrics that would be playing (in the non-instrumental version) as Crowley summons his fury storm:

I see a little silhouetto of a man Scaramouche, Scaramouche, will you do the Fandango? Thunderbolt and lightning, very, very frightening me

Sorry, did I say possible Easter egg? Who am I kidding?!

One last musing on this scene: is it really possible that Aziraphale missed everything that was going on outside here? Yes, he was in the back room as Crowley stormed out, but I can’t help but think that he would have felt something was amiss.

I don’t think I have much to say subtext- or hidden meaning-wise about the scene in Heaven, but here are a couple of little titbits of information that are dropped into the dialogue that are perhaps worth noting:

There are no plans to replace the Supreme Archangel as far as Michael is concerned at this point in time.

The position of Supreme Archangel is always supposed to be filled.

The formal stance at this point is that Gabriel is “absent” from Heaven.

Muriel’s position is a 37th order scrivener (or no-one as they term it, which is a little bit heartbreaking).

Muriel appears to be incapable or unable to say the word “Earth”, choosing instead to say “down”. It is not clear whether this is because they don’t want to say the word, is afraid to use it, or if their understanding is that it shouldn’t be used around higher-order angels.

Returning to something I touched on in an earlier write up, we’re introduced to another tartan-wearing angel in Saraqael. Her tartan touches are subtler (and of a different pattern) than Muriel’s, but evident nonetheless.

The matchbox has been identified as a “material object”, which apparently is impossible in Heaven, and the angels are all clearly uncomfortable with its presence.

I had pondered about how we distinguish between the matchbox being a material object and the other apparent material objects in this scene (Muriel’s files or Saraqael’s chair for instance. Or all of their clothes…), but Uriel later refers to it as an “earthly object”, which might explain that one (the matchbox being the only one of those items that originated on Earth).

There is one question that screams out in my mind when we see Crowley returning to his car, and it’s this: where has he been since storming out of the bookshop? It’s full dark in this supposed back street of Edinburgh London (it must be London, you can see The Shard and The Gherkin all lit up in the background 😉), but when he left Soho, it was full daylight. And when I think about it, he left Soho walking down the road away from the Bentley, which you can see was still parked outside the coffee shop here:

All of which means he must have returned to Soho at some point, if for no other reason than to pick up the Bentley (which would have been in full view of the bookshop for Aziraphale to see that he was or wasn’t still in the area). And yet, when we see him enter this scene, he hasn’t just arrived at his little parking spot because at the beginning of the shot we see him approaching the car. It’s probably nothing, just convenience of stage directions to get him from one place to another, but it just makes me wonder. Wherever he’s been, it’s clear he’s not angry anymore:

He just looks exhausted and sad, bless his little cotton socks. What we can also see here is that there is a fly already on the car windshield as he gets into the Bentley. Not only that, the plants in the rear seat appear to be trembling ever so slightly. It says a lot to me that he doesn’t pick up on either of these things, because if he had, he might have known that Beelzebub was already waiting for him to return. And she makes an interesting observation almost immediately in this next scene – Crowley can try to invoke their so-called “generalised understanding” as much as he wants, but it’s in her power to renege on it at any time she chooses. It makes me wonder why it is that she hasn’t done so already, or why Heaven haven’t done something similar to Aziraphale, but ultimately I’m of a mind that they just thought their existences were better off without a wayward angel and/or demon in them.

We had some subtextual reminders of the winged forms of both Aziraphale and Crowley in the bookshop scene previously, but this scene has a similar subtle reminder of how Crowley is perceived in Hell – as a demon.

Just like with the coffee shop music earlier in the episode, I can’t believe that this prop and this camera angle are coincidental. Nor do I believe that Crowley’s repositioning of himself is anything short of a deliberate attempt to disassociate himself from that image.

I just want to make a quick note about an odd little facial expression we see from Crowley immediately after Beelzebub says Gabriel has gone missing.

It happens pretty quickly, so the gif has been slowed down. I’ve seen some theories arguing that this is potentially Crowley catching a fly and storing it in his cheek, which in fairness has a lovely symmetry with the bullet catch trick. I don’t think I buy that theory for a couple of reasons. Firstly, I can’t see or hear a fly/the cessation of a buzzing fly that would tie in with one being secreted somewhere. Given that every time a fly has been a Clue in this episode up to now, its presence has been marked by a buzzing in the soundtrack, so that wouldn’t be in keeping. Secondly, for Crowley to do this would require him to know that one of Beelzebub’s flies can be used to keep memories in, something which I don’t think we get any hint of. For my money, I think this is just a tic – he’s reacting to something that’s been said that makes him nervous, anxious even (that woman screaming in the background probably doesn’t help). I know, I know - my interpretation is a lot more mundane and less interesting, sorry! I just didn’t want that little moment to go by unmentioned. With all of that said, there are a couple of other interesting facial expressions we see whilst Beelzebub is making her pleas:

I’m still of the mind that these are nervous tics, but please feel free to try and convince me otherwise 😊

I have just a couple more things to say about this scene, but they’re all fairly minor:

Crowley looks away when Beelzebub tells him he can name his price. It feels odd to me that he does this – perhaps this is just a subconscious way of saying that what he wants more than anything at this point is to get out of Hell?

The sound of the woman screaming in the background seems very deliberate in its timing to me. It usually kicks in just after Beelzebub has delivered some sort of blow about how terrible the situation is with Gabriel’s disappearance, so it makes me feel like this might be an aural representation of Crowley emotional state of mind at those points.

Beelzebub initially asks Crowley to help “us” (i.e. Hell) to find Gabriel, but changes to the first person singular when she doesn’t get what she wants – it’s a pretty obvious Freudian slip out of desperation.

The situation with Gabriel is referred to by Beelzebub as “this affair”. Lovely little word trick at play there.

Beelzebub finishes their discussion with an insistence that Crowley go to her specifically (not Hell, or another demonic officer of Hell) before anybody else if he hears anything.

Here is where we have our first reference to the Book of Life, and how it features into the storyline. On my scant Googling, I learnt that this is an actual tenet of Christianity. Interestingly (again, SCANT research – apologies if this is incorrect and/of causes offence to anyone) it contains the names of people who have put their faith in Jesus, so I think we could put a tick against Aziraphale’s name on that count. More interesting than that though is that, according to the scripture, Jesus himself made a promise that names already in the Book of Life would never be able to be fully removed from it. Blotted out, yes, but not fully erased. And so, we have a couple of options to consider here: either the GO Book of Life performs a different function than that written in Christian scripture, or somebody in Heaven is trying to undo Jesus’s promise (and the fact that Beelzebub uses this as a threat to Crowley suggests that she, and Heaven, know a lot more about what’s going on than they’re making out). I think it’s probably the former – it certainly won’t be the first time in the show that the finer details of the plot take a slightly different path to the real-life templates that they’re based on. Insofar as how this new development relates to our plot, I think it’s interesting to see that Crowley, who clearly has heard of the Book of Life before, believes this be a big bluff, and I actually don’t think Beelzebub is convinced of her own reply that it’s a real thing. What I don’t think we can argue with is the panic on Crowley’s face when he realises the consequences that could be in store for Aziraphale (and the demon himself) if they continue to help Gabriel.

I don’t know what’s going on with the character setup for Nina and Maggie – does anybody else feel like we’re really not given a lot of opportunity to like them? I’ve been pretty vocal about my initial feelings about Nina, which is definitely not helped by this scene, where she clearly judges Maggie for her life choice not to drink, disses her record store (again) and criticises her partner for what seems like a very sensible attitude towards someone they care about (asking for an update when she’s going to be late). OK, I know this last one turns out to be a bit more complicated, but at this point in the storyline, that’s not something we, the audience, have knowledge of. So yeah, I found plenty more opportunity to culture my dislike Nina in this scene. I also found a couple of odd little things that start to skew my assessment of Maggie though, and I’m not OK with that. For instance, what’s with that sickly sweet condescending tone when she tells Nina there’s “no judgement” for her having a tiny cup of wine? It’s almost holier-than-thou. And did she leave the door to her record shop not only unlocked, but also wide open? I mean, WTAF? I know Whickber Street is portrayed as a little sanctuary for its residents, but this is still central London. Nobody would do that. So all of that to say (once again) that I find the character set up for these guys… what’s the word… disappointing? Frustrating? They do turn out to be fairly major characters after all. I just feel like they deserve better, perhaps something more consistent. I could go off into a rant about what this suggests about the creator’s ability to create strong female characters, but I think I’ve already covered that ground.

Little personal note about me – the choice of music used for Bentley’s 110+mph drive across London was the very first hidden meaning thing I picked up on. That’s not to say I didn’t love all of season one, or anything about this episode before this scene, it was just the first time I had a little light bulb go off in my head. And look where that got me. 150K+ words and counting. And for all the credit I give this little moment, it’s actually a pretty obvious piece of subtext – I feel like using Queen’s “Good Old-Fashioned Lover Boy” as a background track for Crowley racing across London to get back to Aziraphale is somewhat akin to using a massive billboard to state that the lover boy in question is Crowley himself. I think my brain melted a bit when I realised that at the time. What I really love about this though is that this thing has layers. The lyrics themselves have references to a saloon car, dancing together, and loving phone calls, as well as dining at the Ritz. The last of those is suspiciously missing from this playing; I’ve seen some speculation that is in itself a bit of foreshadowing, because that scenario is absent from this season, and I have to say I’m not averse to that interpretation because the music actually cuts out very suddenly in the scene right before those lyrics should begin, leaving Crowley in the car in silence.

Very quick Easter egg (only spotted whilst taking the screen grab for this write up): both speedometers in the Bentley have numbers made entirely of 6s.

And a quick point of note from the next bit of conversation between Nina and Maggie (who finally seems to soften about the beloved record store): the record shop used to be actually inside the book shop. Seems like a strange thing for Aziraphale to allow – surely that would have occupied valuable space where there should have been books? I’d actually quite like to know a bit more about Maggie’s grandmother, not for any particular reason, just because I think there’s probably a sweet little story there somewhere (not least because that would have been during a time when our hero couple weren’t talking).

That song just keeps giving, doesn’t it? Check out the specific lyrics playing as Crowley arrives at the bookshop:

Driving back in style in my saloon will do quite nicely.

So literal. Absolutely nothing coincidental about this song choice or these particular lyrics at all as far as I’m concerned. I do love that Crowley parks in the same spot that he always parks in, despite then having to walk down the street to get to the bookshop. Given the insane speeds he’s been driving at to get here in the first place, you’d think he’d park as close to the door as possible, but no, he parks in the same place he always does. That’s his space. He also stays on that side of the street instead of crossing directly to the door. That’s probably a convenience of filming thing, seeing as he needs to be able to see Maggie and Nina locked in the coffee shop, but I think it also speaks to the ingrained muscle memory he has being in this location. As a final point of interest for this section, we’re treated to a miracle noise as Crowley turns on the power in Maggie’s shop. This one has that brushed cymbal effect, and what sounds like a choir on an ascending note – that’s another one for the memory bank to be called on later.

And here we are, arrived at a very obvious place to wrap this section up. I have to say I really enjoyed doing this chunk, despite it being less detailed than previous parts. We’ve seen so much relationship establishment for Crowley and Aziraphale in the episode up to this part, it was almost refreshing to visit other character interactions. I am looking forward to taking a look at that Apology Dance though – I am under no illusions that there will be a lot of gifs and screenshots! For now though, and as always: questions, comments, discussion are always welcome. See you for the next one!

[clonedchaos]

Machine Memories- Day 11: Melody

Summary:

Sammy's trial today was getting unruly and inexperienced musicians-in-training to carry a simple tune.

Rating: G/PG

"My Lord, if you please, do not pierce the drum head. We do not have any extra," Sammy muttered shortly. Of course it was an honor to be in his savior's presence, but he didn't expect for him to have such a disregard for fragile instruments.

"What?" The Ink Demon growled. "Where's the fun in that? You told me to hit the stupid thing."

"Gently, Ink," Audrey corrected for Sammy. The artist sat next to him, violin resting under her chin. She ran the bow across its strings, causing a high-pitched sound to pierce their eardrums. She quickly stopped. "... Sorry, everyone."

"Perhaps he needs some mittens," Allison piped up from behind the microphone.

"Good luck with that. You'd end up with a severed hand," Alice snorted from beside her.

"Who would like to try that idea?" The Ink Demon purred, tapping his claws against the drum head.

Sammy pinched the bridge of his nose. He was getting nowhere with this lot. Only Boris remained at attention with his flute. The wolf was capable of carrying a tune, thankfully. Meanwhile, Tom lurked by the in corner, refusing to participate but actively watching this disaster commence.

Bendy kept bouncing in his chair next to Henry with his tuba. "Come on! Are we going to get back to it or what?"

"If you all would cut the chatter, we might be able to," Sammy answered in exasperation. They had too much to get to, and they were barely five seconds into the song. An hour had agonizingly rolled by with little to no progress.

"How can we? These note sheets hardly make any sense," Henry replied, squinting to try and read the fine print. They had only reviewed it five times already. Sammy sighed.

"You've never played an instrument in your life, Stein?" Alice challenged and moved to stand next to Sammy.

"We went over this--" Sammy began before Bendy raised a hand.

"Sammy? Which is this? A treble cleft or a staff?" He held up his music sheet toward Sammy.

"Pretty sure that's a staff, Bendy," Henry chimed in at the same time Audrey added, "That's a cleft." Both artists stared at one another in confusion.

Something ripped. The Ink Demon stood behind the torn-up drum head, his claws still embedded in its surface. "... That was an accident."

Sammy felt like ripping his hair out-- not that he even had any to begin with. This was nothing like his previous life. The musicians he had worked with at the studio were experienced, more or less.  At the very least, they knew the basic roots of sheet reading. His goal was to conduct them, keep them on track, and help correct mistakes when needed.

However, looking back on it now, Sammy never missed the constantly changing deadlines and overwhelming pressure he faced as lead musician. He'd spend days working on the perfect piece, only for Joey to come in a screw it all up claiming "It doesn't fit my vision". Many nights he had stayed up reworking an entire composition before the next morning.

He made music, he loved music. Sometimes he needed a reminder of that. This wasn't Joey's music department anymore. It was his. Perhaps he can learn a bit of patience in time.

[cepheustarot]

What kind of person will you meet soon?

Attention! This reading is for entertainment purposes only. This tarot reading does not give a 100% guarantee that all the described situations will occur. You build your own life and destiny.

Choose one or more cards. Trust your intuition.

Card 1: The person is calm, unhurried, he can do everything slowly, he is balanced, even in stressful situations, he remains calm and does not give in to panic. This person can also be called a leader, he has the ability to lead people, to be in charge, he successfully achieves his goals and plans goals, he never stops there. He can also be called lucky, luck is always, or at least in most cases, on his side. In some situations, he may behave relaxed, bevause he know that victory will be on his side. At the same time, he cannot be called decisive, he often cannot make a decision, because he carefully considers the pros and cons of one or another option. He also cannot be called a permanent person, he may be interested in many topics, get carried away with something, but at the same time he does not have a permanent hobby or social circle. You will get to know this person thanks to your friend or acquaintances, you could also be in the same company all this time, but never communicate closely. Or you will be brought closer together by joint activities, work on a project. I also want to note that communication with this person will give you motivation, inner strength. If it was hard for you to refuse people or it was hard to defend your opinion, then through communication with this person you will learn to defend your personal boundaries, put a person in their place. It is also possible that you always judge and look at the situation from one side, but soon you will learn to look at things from two sides, which will help you not to jump to conclusions.

Card 2: I want to say right away that this is a person from the past! Perhaps earlier you were brought together by a close friendship, or maybe even you had sympathy for each other, or your parents communicated well with each other and therefore you also had to contact. It may not necessarily be your friend or lover, it may be a relative, a family member, a classmate, and a person with whom you shared a common activity, work. The person himself is sullen, uncommunicative and for the most part closed, laconic. A creative person, for some reason intuition suggests that he is interested in music, plays a musical instrument or collects albums of musical groups, knows many genres, perhaps creates music himself. But this is not necessarily music, there are many creative areas, remember this! By the way, despite his sullenness, he is quite generous and always ready to help in difficult times, share experience, advice, support and comfort. Perhaps he drives a car or rides a motorcycle, skateboard, bicycle scooter, etc. And it is also possible that he often moves. With regard to what communication with this person will give you…Faith in yourself and the belief that you can move mountains, because you are a very capable person in yourself, you learn a lot and know how to do a lot. Now it is morally difficult for you and you feel like a loser or do not understand how to be and what to do next. Therefore, communication with a person should help you or at least raise your inner mood.

Card 3: Here we are talking about a peson who is quite well-groomed and neat, always dresses well and has a sense of style, he is in the center of attention and it is difficult not to notice such a person. With all this, the person looks unapproachable, it is difficult to get to know and get closer to him, he seems to be deliberately not letting people get closer to him. Probably, earlier he had an unpleasant situation with people where he was betrayed or framed, which is why he behaves extremely cautiously. He needs a lot of time to trust a person. I also want to note that he is quite talented and capable, he understands a lot of topics and can do a lot of things (if not now, then at least in the past). The acquaintance will take place thanks to some mutual acquaintance of yours and this person will turn to you for advice, since you have been described as a competent person, a good specialist or a person with extensive experience. If you decide to get close to him, then please be careful and attentive! At a minimum, a person is quite sensitive and takes words to heart, it is difficult to communicate with him in this regard, and he can also quarrel with your close friends, which will lead to the termination of communication with friends.

Thank you for reading! I will be glad of any feedback <3

[mass-effect-galaxy]

Baldur's Gate 3 roleplaying idea: The Eilistraee Sword Dancer

(the "evil drow" variant is here)

I am still rather new to DnD lore and therefore I am still looking at what kind of characters you would actually be seeing in BG3 and how they would react and act in the story.

I became interested in the cult of Eilistraee by chance when I turned Shadowheart into a cleric of the Dark Maiden because I didn't find the altar to Selûne in the pantheon next to the Elfsong. This made me curious to learn more about that religion (other than the obvious naked drow dancing with a sword).

I quickly realized that an Eilistraee cleric would be perfect for a Tav character. These brave men and women are used to traveling the surface, making contact with other people, and offering help and guidance wherever needed - basically what you do being the protagonist here.

Eilistraee clerics are usually, but not exclusively, drow women. This religion is open to all races and has many elf, human, and half-elf followers. For about a century now, the clergy is also open to men. So, you can be of any race and gender when playing an Eilistraee cleric. Specific orders, like the Sword Dancer, are still limited to drow, elf, or half-elf women.

Technically, you want to have the first level as a War Domain cleric of Eilistraee and multi-class the rest into School of Sword bard. The cleric uses wisdom for spell-casting and the bard uses charisma. You should focus on charisma because Eilistraeans are supposed to solve conflicts by diplomacy, whenever possible.

As a cleric of Eilistraee, you are practically the embodiment of Good. Her clerics are expected to be proficient both in swordplay and arts, most notably dancing, singing, and playing instruments. They are supposed to offer succor with their music and protection with their swords.

These clerics travel to communities of different races to provide whatever help is needed. They in particular travel to those regions where drow are not welcome, probably because of misdeeds done by Lolth-sworn drows. These kinds of pilgrimages are called "Run". Their purpose is not spreading the Eilistraean faith but the improvement of the peaceful coexistence of races, with the ultimate goal of making the surface a safe place for drow. Anti-racism is a pillar of the Eilistraean faith.

Even though we accidentally end up in the Emerald Grove while it is under attack by goblins and drow, that place would certainly be a place that would see the visit of Eilistraean clerics soon. The priestesses would provide healing, music, food for the needy, and protection from wild animals and dangerous monsters (the "High Hunt").

So, that's what you do: you talk to people and offer your help. You don't ask for anything in return, and when you get rewards you use that money to buy useful things for your companions. You do not steal or plunder, and when you loot dead enemies you only take what you need (food, coin, and gear you are actually going to use).

You try to solve conflicts without violence, as much as possible. However, this has its limits - and you don't carry around a sword because it looks good (Clerics of Eilistraee don't use bows and crossbows, BTW). You abhor slavery, and whenever you can't convince someone to let go of his slaves, you are free to strike him down. You also don't run around claiming to be a True Soul. If someone assumes that on his own, it is their business; but you won't claim it yourself - even when the outcome would be a fight. If violence is unavoidable, you should try to end it as quickly as possible with as few people as possible getting involved.

Being a "light side" cleric in a world where all gods are real would also mean that you should respect other peoples' allegiances. I don't think that it would be right to lecture Shadowheart on her Sharran faith. I would even go as far as saying that interfering with Shar ordering Shadowheart to kill a daughter of Selûne would be overstepping your boundaries as sort of an envoy of Eilistraee. This is definitely true for Gale: It is not your place to question Mystra commanding Gale to sacrifice himself. And if he is willing to do so, you would see your part in supporting him in whatever way you can on that path - what would also be the proper ending for that playthrough (don't bring him to the end of Act 2, though).

Even though Eilistraee is usually depicted as a nude dancer, this is not really a nudist cult. Rites are usually performed naked. During the High Hunt (in terms of BG3, the boss fights against the chosen three) clerics of Eilistraee are naked too and only armed with swords. In all other situations, a cleric of Eilistraee would be wearing practical clothing appropriate for the task; probably even less revealing and flashy than what is considered fashion amongst Lolth-sworn drow.

On a side note, being a drow and a bard gives you the highest amount of special dialogue the game offers in one run.

[neshabeingchildish]

We'll Raise Him Right, Part 2

Tagged: Charlotte Page, Max Thunderman, Mika Macklin, Chapa De Silva

Notes: Don’t mind me. Just clearing my mind of a little bit of Charlotte x Max lore from my notes.

Plot: Mini Max has been training underneath Mika, AKA Shoutout, and Chapa AKA Volt comes around to see the progress. Potentially Zenryverse, but no mention of Zenryverse characters.

If Mini Max was startled, he would let out a yelp and everyone was startled. Not from the sound of the yelp, but from the link of his feeling with the sound. If he was nervous, everyone got nervous. He learned to hum a tune for everyone else to calm down, even if he couldn’t calm himself down. But if he cried, it was like a cloud of dread covered everyone in his immediate world. 

Once, he began crying when he couldn’t pet a service dog, because Charlotte told him, “That doggie is working, Maxi. We can’t play with him right now.” His tears were practically immediate. The disabled pet owner began crying, the dog began barking and Charlotte saw on the faces of nearby bystanders that they were next. Hurriedly, she tried to get her child away from people, while Max reached out to take him off of her hands. “We aren’t honing this skill with him. Why is he wielding it?” She asked, tears streaming down her cheeks.

Max, unable to find his singing voice in this despair, cried back, “Because he can’t control it, since we aren’t honing it. It’s tied to his feelings! Either he’ll have to be taught how to disable his feelings, or taught how to enable his powers.”

It would be cruel to try to make him disable his feelings. He was a little kid. He was human. He deserved to have his feelings.

“I’ll schedule training with Mika,” Charlotte said, her voice a little clearer. She realized that the dread was gone and hope came in. Max let out a relieved laugh and they both checked on the boy. He was distracted by a Happy Fun Burger. They nodded at each other and headed that way to get him a meal and a toy.

Theoretically, they knew how the hypnosis worked, and Mika could teach him based on that. Fortunately, more often than not, he was a very happy child. That fact made him a joy to be around for most people, most of the time. Humming and singing felt nice, so he often did it to turn his feelings around when they began to go to sadness or fear. Those were generally the bad feelings that got to him sometimes. He hardly ever got mad. 

When it was time for training, Mika set the first goal. This goal was that his voice would become both a serenade and a stronghold. He had a human vocal coach and a super vocal coach, and Mika was his mentor and manager. She would review his training with both coaches, monitor his scans, and give him lessons according to those findings.

“I was a teenager when I got my superpower. I was criticized for blooming later than everyone else on my team. I know what it's like to think constantly about your superpower. This is what I want you to always remember, because it can be even more important for you, considering that you were born super and your power has an emotional aspect to it. It may feel like your superpower is your identity. It is not. Your superpower is a characteristic. It can be a gift, a tool, an instrument, a weapon, etc; but it is not who you are. And, it is not in control.” 

He smiled at her and she felt a tingle in her heart. A flutter of appreciation and of trust. She would never let him down. He wasn’t just her greatest project. He would be one of the most important aspects of her life as a superhero.

Mini Max was advanced in learning. Max was quite arrogant about making a perfect genius the first time around. Because he played guitar and sang to him when he was in the womb, he also took credit for Mini Max’s musicality (despite the fact that Charlotte could also play guitar and Maxi only ever fiddled with instruments when attempting to collect notes to assign voice actions to). He would find a note, sing it and attach it to some type of command. 

By age 4, he had began to use a vocalise in order to move things around. “I don’t scientifically understand this aspect of his superpower,” Chapa said, watching him sing softly at a small ball and keeping it in the air with his song, almost like a seal. “Doesn’t he have voice hypnosis and sonic scream? How the heck does that give him… singing telekinesis, or whatever?”

“Because his voice is moving the object,” Mika said, as though it was obvious. The two of them were in their superhero outfits and Mini Max was in his training gear, oblivious to their discussions, as they were too far away and he was preoccupied with the day’s practice.

“Breath control is an important part of vocal technique, so he’s able to manipulate his breath and vocally move the object. Sonic scream can devastate things when aimed to do so. But, if we tone down the volume and regulate the breath less forcefully; yes, we can move things. I think of it as a vocal shove. He is a natural with great practice and teachings, so he can turn it down as low as even a vocal nudge, and that’s what you’re watching him to with the ball.”

Chapa was impressed. “Could he… could he whisper an attack?”

Mika’s smile grew wide at her partner’s interest. “Not whisper, but check this out…” Mika made a call with her sonic voice to gain Mini Max’s attention, then made a gesture like a choir director to end the singing. Maxi quickly stopped his vocalise and caught the ball in one hand to turn his attention to his teacher. “Will you show Volt your “hit a note” move?”

He nodded, smiling. This was something that he was quite confident about. Mini Max threw the ball gently into the air, then hit a particular note for just a moment, and with that note, spiked it across the yard as far through the sky as he could.

“No way! Kid can throw a punch with his singing voice!” She gave him a fist bump.

Mika interjected, “More than that, Volt. He can use his voice to quite literally touch things. Humans, he can touch both emotionally and physically. Other objects, he can touch at just about any volume or pitch, and depending on what he puts into the notes determines how hard or soft he touches things.” She leaned in and whispered, “I have a theory that at a certain pitch, he may be capable of killing someone.”

“That is AWESOME!” Chapa cheered.

“It is… a fascinating but terrible possibility.” She handed Chapa a pair of extra noise blocking earmuffs and put on a pair of her own. She lifted her hand to get Mini Max’s attention, then asked, “Wanna show Volt how to handle a tough crowd?”

Now, the kid gulped and looked at an arrangement of rows of various glass containers, lined up on multiple heighted surfaces. There were several rows, and so many glass containers, not evenly spaced or anything. He had seen Shoutout do great things, but when he tried some of the same things, he could never accomplish them. Now, she was requesting he do this in front of someone else? A fellow superhero, at that?

“Remember!” Mika chimed, “I’ve been a hero for years and have been training and working since I was a teenager. You are not a hero and nobody expects you to be. You’re a child with a superpower that you’re practicing to develop. I don’t expect to see you do what I can do. I want you to show us what you can do.”

He held these words in his heart and mind as he put one finger into the air and one to his ear.

“Can do, can do, can do…” he sang, raising his voice until he found the note he needed, then pointed the lifted finger towards the rows of glasses and sung a very pointed, “Ooo! Ooo! Oo! OOooo!” He either moved, cracked, knocked over, or broke one of most of the glasses. His shoulders sank and he remembered the awe he was in seeing Mika shout and reduce each glass that she aimed at to chards within moments. 

He turned to face the heroes as they removed their ear muffs and came forward. “Crowd’s still tough.”

Volt guffawed, “Are you kidding? It took Shoutout forever to be able to pull off a move like that.” Mini Max squinted his eyes in confusion.

“Not forever, obviously. Just a while.” She looked at Chapa, “I told you don’t use hyperbole with him. He’s four.”

“A genius four, though,” Chapa challenged.

Ignoring her words and placing a hand over her mouth, Mika said, “Good job, M. That’s it for today.”

[edgymuses]

༶ ﾟ🥀 ┄─ having dreams should be a goal that anyone should fulfill in life. it's what drives someone and bring happiness when living in a cruel soulless world. of course with big or "unreasonable" dream, there are those who loved to bring it down. grounding a dreamer to harsh reality. a person that comes to mind is mr. mishina, his dad. he had no clue about eikichi’s double life. being a perfect son at home, but to the outside world, plus his mom, he was michel; a flamboyant front man of a rock group called gas chamber. even with his father’s expectations for his son to run the family’s sushi restaurant; this would not stop eikichi to fulfill his dream. a dream since his first year of middle school. what is that dream? making his indie rock band famous! no more daydreaming in class or pretending to have screaming adoring crowd cheering his name while singing in the shower. no more what ifs. or letting his father dictate his life using fear. it's the year of making dreams happen.

even with a dream it was rough making it happen. gas chamber became like expired chips, stale. it was time to spice things up by introducing a new interesting act to their band. what better way of getting new blood than to put flyers around town and on the web. an advertisement saying, “new member needed for our vkei band gas chambers! any instrument welcomed. refreshments and food will be provided given a generous donation of 768 yen. new member will be announced to said member’s email. tryouts at sumaru prison. let’s kick some ass and show the world who gas chamber really are!!!! good luck!!!!”

on the day of the tryouts the call was answered by a few people with a variety of instruments. tambourines, lutes, cellos, and so much more! but something wasn’t clicking. the tryouts continued on and eikichi was not satisfied with some of the acts present. that was until the piano players’ turn to try out. At first dull, but soon this next person caught his eye, drawing it to the vibrant yellow scarf.

as soon as the stranger puts their portable keyboard down and their fingers dance across the keys; eikichi was entranced by the music like a snake being charmed by a pungi. eyes closed as his foot taps along with the beat of the music until the song ends. that sprit and enthusiasm to his art just clicked. right then and there all the bandmates knew they had their fifth member of gas chamber! so much so, the group of boys at the end of tryouts ran after the stranger stopping him to announcing the news. along with this news they presented him with a matching armband of the band’s logo.

a few weeks of band practice and nonband related activities; the rest of the members began to warm up to the newcomer and learn his name, ryoji mochizuki. perhaps having ryoji in the band or crossing paths with ladyuck, after their usual show at open mic night a flyer for a music competition appeared on the cafe’s bulletin board. the prize for the winners was a record deal with the company hosting the competition and what appears to be a large sum of yen. finally! gas chamber’s lucky break! no more performing at open mic nights or hole-in-the-wall bars! or half the time performing at karaoke bars. not only will they be performing to eikichi's small group of friends, but for a pack crowd! hell if the band was successful enough, a solid out stadium!

with this exciting development, gas chamber began the perpetration. fast forward a week before the competition, eikichi agreed to meet ryoji at the cafe that usually host the open mic night. this meeting was to practiced for the big day and give a makeover to ryoji. the new comer need a little michel flare to his look. eyeliner and all. his eyes shot up as soon as the bell above the door rang. a person with a recognizable yellow scarf stepped into the cafe.

❛❛ yo ryoji, get your ass over here!! you can’t keep the most handsome guy in the room waiting! ❜❜ 

@enshijou 💜'd for a plotted starter!

[therealslimshakespeare]

Another question was, with Rosey on board was the Captain still prostituting himself? And why was he doing it if he was I thought he didn’t have to?

Aha, thanks for asking as I kinda wove this in but I’ve had a few other asks that show confusion so I really want to clear this up.

Hard no.

In the very first chapter you may recall Rosetta referencing a change in him a year ago, a starting afresh and in the latest chapter Aida referenced it “only taking a year for him to miss it.” Along with a few other hints the point was made he was not currently and hadn’t for a full year at least.

However, neither did he stop as soon as he got back in Memphis after the war which had been his goal. Colonel Parker tidied it up, gave him goals and incentives and promises of an end in sight but as we’ve learned, that was hardly a honest vision. Presley didn’t begin by owning the boat and in order to buy it and Captain it himself he had to earn the money which in many ways was just entertainment and working the gambling tables but was also, bluntly, a less desperate form of prostitution physically as well. It was prostitution all the same and with some severe consequences to his own psyche, mentality and trust.

Last chapter it was mentioned he worried awhile back that a female client had become pregnant as he was denied the chance to take the usual precautions. The horror of a child of his being raised by such deplorables as that particular client drove him to manslaughter, a full break from giving himself monetarily (we meet him in this new era) and certainly informs his fear of full intimacy with Rosey. We do see him “slipping” into a sort of persona he used back when he was “working” -particularly with Binder, but it’s also mentioned he finds it alarming how easy it is to slip back into a role he both loathes and has turned his back on for good. It is a power play, though, and a defense mechanism fully ingrained at this point.

Historical side note (TW this may be disturbing due to dehumanizing factors) -fads of sexual mania come and go, it’s bdsm one decade and wax the next, lol, but one such fixation during the late 1800’s was consensual and witnessed cuckolding. To each their own but these folks liked to make it nice and weird by paying a man of “lower birth” to “defile” the gentrified lady while her husband got off on it (or joined in the back door of the man) and the more emphasis on the man being lowborn, beastly and uncouth the hotter. Tbh, some of the accounts and writings on it have a Darwinian undertone that suggest they really thought of it akin to bestiality. Can you imagine the awful mind fuck of that? For CP? Like yes he’s out of the cruel back alleys but now he’s an active instrument in besmirching a marriage (a institution he already had idealistic respect for) and while doing so the entire erotic emphasis is on him being lesser somehow than the people paying. It’s objectification to the max and it’s not something you just rewire in your brain the moment you stop doing it. Anyways thanks for listening to the ramble. One book that informed me in this regard is this memoir of male prostitute John Saul from Dublin Ireland in the 1800’s: The Sins of the Cities of the Plain; or, The Recollections of a Mary-Ann, with Short Essays on Sodomy and Tribadism.

[paalove]

As a prompt a jealous (more insecure) tinn from MSP? They are together now , gun makes a new friend who always is attached to him and tinn is happy for gun, he is. But also he fears that he won't ever be good enough for him and then he pulls back lightly and gun notices and is like??? My baby????

insecure slash jealous tinn, coming right up! (for a given value of "right up", you def requested this months ago haha) thanks for the prompt!

also on ao3

Tinn is going to be left alone, forever, and he’ll die single and clutching the selfie where Gun’s kissing his cheek.

“What do you mean, ‘the’ selfie?” Tiw asks.

Rolling onto his back to stare at the one cloud making its lonely, single way across the sky, he says, “The one where my eyes are closed and I’m wearing the white shirt but you can barely see it because he’s draped across me so it looks like we’re in the same shirt.”

“Ahh.”

“Do you think he’s at the café yet?”

Tiw shuffles over on the grass next to Tinn. He’s got something in his hand; Tinn watches as Tiw raises his balled fist over Tinn’s chest, high up, and opens it.

Grass rains over him.

Then Tiw says, “You know they’re, like, rivals, right? From the training.”

“Exactly,” despairs Tinn. “They were rivals, which proves they’re similar and have chemistry, and that Tul is a talented musician, but now they both have the contract confirmed so they’re learning to get along.”

Tiw nods, like this isn’t a world-ending disaster.

“They’re learning to get along after a rivalry, Tiw! Like Gun and I did! And they work together, so he's always around.”

This finally makes a look of understanding cross Tiw’s face; he’s getting the severity of the situation, now.

But then he makes a confused face again, and he says, “I don’t think you guys were ever rivals. It hurt your feelings when you had to be, like, a little bit mean to him.”

Tinn sighs, remembering.

Gun was so cute when he thought Tinn was trying to thwart him, all driven and dramatic and occasionally roaring in his face, and there was nobody else going after him at all, it was-

“Tinn?”

It was amazing, such a good time when he thinks back, even the hard parts ones they could get through and even the bad news could be overcome and redone-

“Tinn! Por’s texted, I’m going to meet him at the bubble tea place by the weird bridge, bye.”

And Gun’s determination to see things through carried Tinn, carried all their friends, past every obstacle and through everything. He’s such an amazing, warm, happy person and Tinn doesn’t know what he’ll do if they really break up.

He’s smiling to himself, mostly, when he opens his eyes.

But then he sits up and looks around in confusion; where did Tiw go?

…

Tul nudges him on the shoulder as the group breaks up.

When Gun looks up at him, he’s smirking, and he says, “Is this what you were expecting?”

“There are so many vegetarians,” Gun immediately says.

He’d had a sort of vision that it would be like music club used to be – okay, they wouldn’t be as close, of course not, but they were all singers and performers who were working together and towards the same goals, so they’d be friendly and gather with their instruments and maybe even do hotpot together.

But probably the hotpot isn’t going to be a thing, because all four of the people who just left before Gun are vegetarians.

Tul shrugs and says, “That wasn’t really what I meant. You were expecting this much talking, then?”

Frowning, Gun points to Tul, and then to himself, then sort of wags his finger between them.

They aren’t talking a weird amount, he thinks.

“Not like-“ Tul snorts, “Man, this is why I thought there was no way you were finishing training. Interviews take nuance and shit, what the fuck is-“

“-Hey, what the hell, how do you know I don’t have a nuance-“

“-Tell me what a nuance is, right now,” Tul keeps smirking.

Gun says, “Okay, so I don’t know what one is, that doesn’t mean I can’t sing!”

“Peace, okay? Peace,” Tul’s laughing now, holding a hand out to, like, shake, because he went to a pretty formal school and it comes out in weird moments, sometimes.

It doesn’t hurt to shake hands and it’s never bad to make peace, so Gun does.

He pulls his hand out of Tul’s as Tul starts with, “All I meant was- wait, what the fuck was I talking about.”

“Talking,” Gun helpfully reminds him.

They’ve stopped walking – Tul because Gun has, and Gun because Tinn was supposed to be by the fountain in this park, but he can’t see him anywhere.

He’s only half-listening as Tul says, “Right, yeah, that. I just meant I kind of thought we’d be in the studio, not spending half the time meeting previous years’ hires and weird old guys nobody will tell us the actual jobs of and that one guy who was-“

There.

It was hard to find him because he’s alone – Tiw must have left – and instead of sitting up, looking for Gun, he’s huddled into a ball facing away. But Gun would recognise the back of his head from a much further distance than this.

He interrupts Tul, probably in the middle of a sentence or something, to say, “There he is! Do you want to meet my boyfriend?”

“Um- I,” Tul doesn’t finish.

Seems like a yes – he doesn’t pull out from under the arm Gun swings over his shoulders to drag him over.

As soon as he gets to Tinn, still curled up on the ground, he can feel the rest of the tense nervous excitement that fills him whenever he remembers that this is his job, now, finally drain away. He could never be tense around Tinn.

But why is he curled up?

With that question in mind, Gun speaks softly when he says, “Tinn?” in case it’s because of a headache or something.

Tinn doesn’t uncurl in response – he lifts his head and turns to the side enough to peek out of the little huddle.

Gun waves, one-handed, at him.

“Hi,” mumbles Tinn.

He’s glancing to Tul, so Gun says, “This is Tul – I’ve told you about Tul. I don’t think he’s a dick anymore. Tul, this is Tinn! He’s my boyfriend.”

Gun might be grinning a lot, but whatever, he’s totally entitled to that.

“Anymore?” Tul laughs, shoving at Gun’s arm.

That means they’re disentangled enough for Gun to sit down, cross-legged, by his huddled boyfriend. Who is still looking up at Tul silently.

Gun looks up to, and nods in response to Tul’s question, telling him, “I was kind of nervous during the final round auditions. Sorry about the thing with the table.”

“Oh, no, that was my fault, bro, I’m just surprised you stopped thinking I’m a dick,” Tul smirks again, “People generally agree on that point.”

“I think you’re nice when you aren’t worried about stuff,” Gun starts, but Tul waves his hands.

With another look at Tinn, Tul cuts Gun off to say, “Nice meeting your boyfriend, bro. Be careful.”

“Mae says that too,” Gun agrees, “Because he’s a nice boy.”

It’s fair; he should be careful. Everyone should be careful with Tinn.

The huddled ball next to him tightens up, which is weird, but he’s not looking up at Tul anymore.

Gun waves a goodbye; Tul gives him the peace sign and walks away backwards, with a final, “That’s not what I meant to be careful about.”

The industry, probably, but Gun’s not going to acknowledge it.

People already know about Tinn. Things that are online stay online, and it’s not like he even wants people to not know.

Tinn’s amazing.

He doesn’t want people to think Tinn’s available.

He shuffles up to Tinn’s back, drapes his chin over Tinn’s shoulder, and says, “Head hurt? I told you not to read so much.”

“No,” mumbles Tinn miserably.

Gun manages to work his hands through the tight ball that Tinn’s curled into and gets a hold on his waist, under his arms. When Gun’s hands meet by Tinn’s bellybutton, Gun shuffles and pulls them around until he can roll Tinn onto his back, on Gun’s lap.

Tinn uncurls.

“Hey,” says Gun.

“Hi.”

He strokes Tinn’s soft cheek with one finger, just because he can, and says, “What’s wrong?”

Tinn sighs and looks sad.

“Should I ask Tiw-“

“-No.”

He strokes Tinn’s cheek again and watches him turn his face towards it.

“Did you want to spend more of the day together?”

Shaking his head, Tinn sighs again and whispers, “I know it’s important. You and Tul need to go to that stuff.”

He nods and watches Tinn’s face.

Gun knows Tinn; the whispering means he’s not willing to put all his confidence into saying that.

Which means…

“Are you sure it’s not that?”

Tinn closes his eyes.

Then, in a quick burst, he says, “You don’t think he’s cute do you?”

Gun frowns.

“Who?”

Tinn opens his eyes and says, “Tul. You don’t like him?”

“Tul?!”

He can’t make that thought fit together.

But Tinn’s upset, clearly, so he doesn’t laugh out loud and instead says, “No, I don’t like Tul. We’re the same height.”

“What?”

“That’s not important,” Gun can feel his ears flushing.

He possibly hasn’t made his thing about Tinn’s height clear, whatever, this isn’t the time for that, he’s pretty sure.

Tinn, who is perfect, just pauses and says, “Okay… So you don’t like him?”

“You’re my boyfriend, I like you,” is a better response that doesn’t bring up the height thing.

He’s taking the height thing to his grave.

If Por can keep his mouth shut about that time-

Tinn’s smiling shyly, now, turning his face away. So Gun reaches out his hand and turns Tinn’s face back.

“What,” he teases, “You didn’t know you were my boyfriend?”

Mock-calm, Tinn shrugs and stares up at him, saying, “Remind me more.”

He doesn’t think Tinn should be surprised by the tickle-attack that Gun responds with; that’s a boyfriend-thing.

“Gun,” Tinn giggles, breathless.

He’s batting at Gun’s hands, absolutely not fighting him off at all, so Gun wriggles out from under him and continues the offensive, saying, “Hmm? Do you remember?”

Tinn looks very pretty, flushed, which makes this a very important way to spend some of his time. But Gun can’t climb on top of him here – they don’t need to be banned from another outdoor space.

“I remember, I’m your boyfriend,” Tinn laughs.

“Good.”

Then Gun kisses his face, a few times, to make sure he keeps remembering.

[astrxlfinale]

"it is nice to see a familiar face among all these obscure faces lingering within the future." the master diviner greets with a nod of her head, already moving on to the next place with a quickness that seems unmatched by most. always working; always seeking the possibilities of destiny — that was what had to be done. "if you're here for a divination . . . i must dissapoint you & say that it is not possible." a pause, in step & words before a sigh passes through pink lips. "i've taken a peek before and . . . it's strange but when it comes to you, i can't see anything. perhaps for you it is not in the stars to hold your destiny but in yourselves." (from fu xuan :>)

"What can I say? Never been the biggest fan of being a shadow.. or an online fan, so to speak. Ah, hey hold on speedy!" His voice chipped in before his movements worked to that respective rhythm. There truly was no lingering day about the Luofu. It was a lesson he's learned ad nauseam through the art of the Trailblaze. Allowing the flowing serenity of pink to be his guide, a certain request hangs within his throat, figuring the appropriate way to fashion itself as a conversation piece.

How does someone humbly request to use their All-Seeing Matrix? Despite having his earned authority through a wild adventure, it certainly made him no automatic expert, the loftier side of life often being lost upon Caelus.

Underneath the veil of artificial night, there's a moment he comes to appreciate her busy work. A scroll of contents transported to one end (an effort he helped in mind you!), his arms quickly busying themselves with another measure of boxes being safely stationed elsewhere for the good divinators, hands like his simply weren't meant to be idle. Despite the hums of pure Path energy that drifts from the arcane instrument, it wouldn't distract from the inner goal.

A pivotal point he wants to make good on is no 'cheat codes!' Adventure wasn't meant to have that aspect in itself massively spoiled, right?

..So that also means that smaller scale issues were perfectly acceptable? Some precious Clockie Memorabilia found itself missing! Precious, precious memories that were in the making!

With some nonsensical grunt, he doubles down, swallowing that questioning edge as he decides to be earnest.

"Alright! I didn't come here just to be some non-hired muscle, I wanted to--"

An idle wind drifts by this end of the Xianzhou as she seemingly read his mind.

"..E- Eh?" That once brazen tone stutters to a caught off moment of silence, the mental ticks of his mind connecting a few dots.

She tried to do WHAT?!

"Whoaaa, whoa whoa whoa, scratch the before. Now I definitely want you to hold on! You tried to peek that slick mind of yours into my mental cookie jar?!" Why did he put it like that.

Caelus hardly cared one way or another as his form abruptly scurried with additional haste, ensuring that upon a perfect pivot that he comes to face Ms.Fu Xuan entirely. Those molten eyes were lit with purpose! Exactly what in the hell within her grand wisdom did she want to peek upon? As studious and... seemingly uptight she seems to be from time to time, there was an earnest belief there were no wildly made attempts. At the same time could this have been the odd feeling that made the back of his head itch now and then?

Abruptly leaning in, it's enough to settle them face to face.

"One, how many times? Two? Was it like static when you tried tuning to my channel? Three. Were you trying to use my head as some crystal ball to see places never before seen!?" He's now very much invested in this turn of events.

@metrictita

[cato-of-blamesociety]

32 Weeks Tracklist/Song Picks pt. 1 (weeks 1-8)

How/Why did I choose/chose to use the songs I did

*Full breakdown, updated in real time(weekly)*

1. Silent Hill by Kendrick Lamar x Mr. Morale and the Big Steppers

This song was chosen due to subtle melodies but a hard hitting beat. MMATBS played a huge role in my life last summer when it debuted. I followed Kenny like crazy, checking his insta and youtube regularly to see what he would do next. The music videos were food that I consumed over and over again, trying to fully tap into his message. There were other tracks in the album I wanted to remix such as; Purple Hearts/N95/Crown...but Silent Hill just felt more like my style. The lyrics basically wrote themselves. I was able to adequately outline my views for this project, and my goals quickly in the introduction.

2. Promise by Lupe Fiasco x Drogas Light

Drogas was released in 2017, and honestly I can't recall which project I heard first: Drogas or DAMN(Kendrick). I do remember copping the physical CD at a Target and bumping it in the whip on my way home. Lupe has always been a favorite artist of my mine. Dopest metaphors, cool ass voice, and he doesnt compromise his craft. Anyway, in the song, he raps about how rappers lie so much that they can't maintain thier image or even their careers. For me, I have always wanted to rip this beat and I finally did. It provided a dope but repetitive rhythmic framework for me to lay out my direction, my goals, and intentions as a(n): husband, father, artist, this project, and really my life in general moving forward. I hope you vibe with it heavy.

3. Cuff If by Beyonce x Renaissance

As a recent fan of Beyoncé (Lemonade, Everything is Love, Black is King, and Renaissance), I have come to really use the messaging to lean more into my partner. The music that was released (Lemonade and beyond) I felt spoke more to me about cherishing these relationships between spouse, our children and our community. I may not have a huge impact on the world, but to someone close to me, I know that my existence may mean the world to them. This is especially true with marriage. At least mine. We learn to love each other better, to grow together, and hell, parent together. It's not easy. So it's moments like this one where we enjoy our company and have fun.

4. Cut Me a Break ft. TI x The Free Nationals

I happened to stumble across The Free Nationals about 2 years ago. I had begun listening to Anderson.Paak which put me on to Mac Miller, BJ the Chicago Kid, and The Free Nationals. There is a Tiny desk concert that made me respect Paak's talent but also his playfulness with the band made me want learn more. I searched them on Spotify and found that they had released a Self-titled album in 2019...which comes after the death of Mac Miller. He makes an appearance on "Time" and makes me tear up. Anyway, I love the fact that they also released an instrumental version of the album. I knew that I wanted to incorporate them on this project, and this track, "Cut Me a Break" features T.I. coming in hot, and honestly, I don't follow T.I.P.'s music so it was dope to hear an up to date verse from him. I have come to respect and admire his distinguished voice which definitely pops with the band's instrumentation. When I was jamming the instrumental, I starting hearing/coming up with magic metaphors. My album (at the moment untitled/nearly completed) is based on alchemy, growth and self improvement, and 32 weeks is another way to play with that motif and set the stage for the album release. Hope you enjoy!

5. Gray Area ft. Mick Jenkins x Kaytranada

Not going to lie to you all, Kaytranada was a fresh one on my radar. I really didn't know about him. In the beginning stages of writing this tape, I was on the hunt for new music, and it slips my mind but there was trajectory that I followed to landed me to find him. I believe the first project I heard was 99.9% . Then I checked out Bubba which made me realize I f***s with Kay's music. I was super excited when I saw that Bubba had an Instrumental Version. Next step was narrowing down which track I would use. This process took longer than expected because as true Kaytranada fans know...each track was hot. There were so many options. I ended up finding myself being moved by Gray Area. I loved the visualizer he had posted YouTube as well. Next thing you know, I began opening up about my parents, more so my dad, and how their passed down the creativity that I now express. I was visiting my mom one day with my wife and kids. She had on her dinning room table old cards/letters from years past. I spotted one that my dad had made/gave to her. It had his handwriting and omg it was very NSFW lol. Not really but it was definitely cringy for an adult son to read about his father's feelings for his mother. However, my mom began sharing stories about them dating, the nicknames, etc. I realized I got my naughty side from them, and my spark to create/write from my dad. I am truly grateful for that info, as it helps me understand who I am, and what I want to do with my life. I spue some serious dope lines in this track. I hope you enjoy!

6. Fake Names x Freddie Gibbs & Madlib

This one was fun to write. I really stretched my brain to make the metaphors work. A friend introduced me to Freddie's music. I believe Pinata was the first song I heard him on. I definitely went through his whole catalog. Much respect to his craft. When selecting Fake Names, i was searching through his more recent works and I had remembered that his collab with Madlib was fire. Those beats are gold. This one just stuck out the most most. Easy flow, to really take time to dig into the bars, low ambience for vocal presence to shine, and the beat switch which signals the end of my verse. I love the beginning lines expressing my goals. 3 main points: acknowledgement as an emcee, obtaining the bag, and completing every project in the works at the moment. Watch me accomplish each goal!

7. Wailin' x Outkast

This track I feel is straight forward. Although, it should be noted that Wailin' is the oldest track/instrumental that I chose for this project. There really is no true reason why, especially since I was aiming to keep tracks more modern...like no earlier than 2010ish. I have always loved Outkast and ATLiens & Aquemini are my favorite 'Kast albums. I have used Liberation on a previous project. I had begun writing the verse a long time ago, but never gotten around to finish it. However once I was in 32Weeks mode, it was easy and fun to complete. My favorite line pays homage to a song on the ATLiens album (not this one in particular) "Don't wanna float face down in the mainstream, I'd rather walk to my destination on my own two feet..". "Mainstream" speaks a lot about how artist end up either selling out, selling their "souls" , or even flopping/dead all for the fame. I don't worry about that. I do aim for recognition of my effort and skills as an artist, the bread for that said effort, and to continue doing what I do. I hope that if you are reading this you can understand and identify with all that I say. Also, as someone who is working hard to make a dream a reality, I hope you know that if you feel the same pain, the torment, or even the struggles of everyday life, I got you. That is precisely the reason I make music, to help the listeners cope with life.

8. Umbrella ft. 21 Savage x Metro Boomin

This one was one that I truly found joy in writing. Metro Boomin's productions are always fire. You will see later that I indulged in his work for this project. I came across the Album Heroes and Villains and really didn't truly understand where Metro was going with this. I knew it was catchy af though because each track had it's own vibe, and audio return value. The 1st two tracks are what really pulled me in. As I was searching for beats for 32weeks, I knew I wanted a Metro track...then I discovered that he released the Hero's version of his album...which the second half had all the instrumentals. It was like he was asking for artists to take a stab at creating their own origin stories/sharing them. Which is exactly what I did. Because I am adapting my own story to his track I decided to tell my story of my younger self; death of father, single mother household, selling substances, getting arrested for selling said substances, growing out of that mindset, and walking into the man that I am today. Needless to say, just like this only the first phase of journey, it is also just the beginning of 32 Weeks. I hope those of you seeing this..today 8/30/23 as I write this, or ten/twenty years later, that you find a gem or glimmer of hope from my heart to yours.

[evilrunaway]

metal family theory: diana is dee’s stalker

diana^

I know this feels like it does not make a lot of sense. That’s because it does not. But I have been thinking about this for a while and it’s starting to make sense to me. Diana is actually stalking Dee. 

Okay, but what about the guy already stalking Dee?

I’m just presuming he’s either hired by Diana or he’s working for her somehow. I don’t think it’s out of the realm of possibility. Dee basically stalked Lif to try and get closer to her, and did use his friend to be able to execute his plan. So I don’t see why Diana wouldn’t be capable of doing the same. How she managed to get him involved, I have no idea. He might just be a weirdo and felt like going along with it, who knows. He’s also standing right next to her on the channel banner. 

Channel Banner

I feel like this is important too. Every character on this banner seems like they’re instrumental to the story one way or another. Only the main characters are in color, and everyone else is sketched out. Everyone else is probably a secondary character, but they’re all still important to the story. Diana and Dee’s stalker are both right next to each other. They’re also placed near Dee, so clearly we learn more about them through his story. We haven’t seen a lot about them yet, but clearly, they’re going to play bigger roles as the project continues. 

“Diana’s also not a boring character”

This could easily be just a statement on the fact that part of the projects message is to not judge people based on how they present themselves. I do see how it could be easy for a large part of the audience to just hate Diana because she likes Dee and her hair is pink. But I don’t think so. Here’s my reasoning: No normal person would like Dee. There has to be something wrong with her. I genuinely can’t see any other option. “He’s a pretty strange dude.” Something has to be wrong with her, and if she likes Dee, she can’t be normal. I mean it. I really mean this. I’m so confused by her character. Usually someone like her would just take it when Dee deliberately gave her the wrong answer, but instead, she kind of tried to ruin his life. Something is WRONG with her. And she probably still has a crush on him. I don’t get it. Dee had to continuously stalk Lif to try and get her attention because he’s such a weird person. He just operates on his own goals and desires. He’s fixated with being the best, for no ones validation in particular except maybe his old ass teachers, sits alone, and just generally broods everywhere he goes. And yet she likes him. Either she’s a stalker or she's unmedicated, and being a stalker is more interesting for the story, so I’m going with that. 

None of this makes sense. What if she’s just normal?

Yeah you’re probably right