#More Francesca for you
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This a-hole who keeps harassing my other cat and pooping in my couch gets more notes that any of my art and i can't be angry because yeah, she cute, she deserves it
#More Francesca for you#New Kitten#Kitten#Cat#cat of tumblr#tabby cat#She's also technically a calico? She does have three colors so#My new cat#New cat#I only take pictures while she's sleeping because that's the only moment where she stops
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If I could hold you for a minute, Darling, I’d go through it again
For @edsbacktattoo & @stedesearring 💕 Show: Our Flag Means Death - Season 1 & 2 Music: Francesca by Hozier YouTube
#ofmd#our flag means death#gentlebeard#stede bonnet#edward teach#ofmdedit#ofmdaily#ofmd source#ofmd fanvid#ofmd s2#ofmd edit#blackbonnet#ella’s edit#HAPPY BIRTHDAY JAMS ❤️#AND A BELATED HAPPY BIRTHDAY KAITLIN ❤️#i'm killing two (impossible) birds with one stone by dedictating this video to both of you absolute angels!!#jams i love you so much. you're so incredibly talented and hilarious and kind and amazing. i'm so grateful for you.#if you didn't live halfway around the world i would come over and give you the biggest and warmest hug#thank you for letting me scream in your dms all the time. whether it's about our pirate boys or your writing or cancellation hell™️#and just THANK YOU for being such a wonderful presence in my life#oh and kaitlin. lovely sweet kind kaitlin. the one we all love to call a human ray of sunshine because you're just THAT lovely#your little yellow hearts in the tags brighten my day every time i see them. whenever i talk to you you're just so sweet#thanks for every single lovely word. for every music rec. for every sweet message or ask. what a gift you are. ily!!!#speaking of gifts: i couldn't think of a more perfect song for the two of you than francesca#so i hope you like my little creation that i've put together. once again shoutout to#evil gang 😈
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I like how Violet is so used to having dramatic ass children that Francesca marrying with no drama was too odd to her lmao. And thinking about how her story will unfold is actually kinda hilarious because it's gonna be like:
Violet: Well, that's it. John is a very good man and Francesca is comfortable and happy with her choice and if this is what she truly wants, it's all that matters💜
Violet: Also, it's kinda refreshing to finally have a normal child that doesn't do any dramatic or scandalous shit.
Francesca a few seasons later after her husband passes: *fucks and falls in love with her husband's cousin -who is a woman-*
Violet:
Violet: Honestly, I should've seen this coming, none of my children will actually ever be normal.
#i would be so done with all of them tbh#daphne and her fake dating#anthony having an enemies to lovers with his fiancé's older sister which honestly so far takes the win as most dramatic and messy lmao#colin would be more normal if it weren't because of his history with marina which was scandalous#and because in his second engagement he literally ruined ANOTHER proposal first and hooked up in a carriage with pen ten minutes later#also he married lw so yeah#let's not even talk about benedict and his stories#and then you have francesca whose first chance is very normal and without drama and damn you think finally a normal bridgerton sibling#and it turns out she was saving all the drama and scandal shit for her second partner#because honestly her being queer and having a story with her late husband's female cousin might even beat kanthony's drama like lmao#bridgerton#violet bridgerton#benedict bridgerton#francesca bridgerton#anthony bridgerton#daphne bridgerton#kanthony#michaela stirling#francesca x michaela
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KISS YOUR LOCAL KING NOW! ❤️👑
Hugs and kisses on the cheek are peak pda for me, both between friends and partners, so of course my ocs reflect it :)
#fallout#fallout new vegas#fnv#oc: jeremias#oc: jeremias reyes#oc: francesca#oc: monica#my art#my posts#art#illustration#francesca and monica are together#in case you were wondering about the kiss on monica's shoulder#the kings#kings oc#more to be added
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Me forcing myself to be grateful to be getting any queer rep at all when I know that getting one sapphic main character means we won’t get another
#bridgerton#bridgerton spoilers#genuinely very excited about Francesca#but VERY concerned that this will mean they have to make Eloise get with a man#even though she is the gayest character I have ever seen#please be brave Netflix and realise you can have more than one sapphic storyline#I am BEGGING#eloise bridgerton#creloise
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Having plenty of thoughts about Pirate Billy and Mermaid reader, involving a very sisterly ritual of talking about boys… ୨ৎ ⋆.˚ 𓇼
Imagining letting Pirate!Billy braid your hair!! Your back is to his chest, you’re laying between his bent legs with your lands cupping his knees. Your tail is in the surf, swaying and gently flipping with the tide, and Billy’s hands are twirling your hair. Now and then he drops tender kisses to your scalp, until he eventually just mutters, “Lemme braid your hair, baby.”
You look up at him, your brows drawing together and a smile curling your lips. “You? Braiding?” Your sisters and your mother were the only ones to ever touch your hair. And, well, their braids were plaits, were intricate artworks, designs that seemed a little too much for human fingers. Much less, you giggle, a man’s fingers.
Billy just snorts, twirling some of your dark locks around his fingers. “M’ a sailor! Know plenty of braids n’ knots, yanno.” You hum thoughtfully, and nod your head. “Okay. Show me.”
Billy diligently gets to work, parting your hair down the middle and getting to work on twin French braids. Your hair is like silk over his palms, slipping through his fingers like water. He’s so hesitant to tug or pull, not wanting to hurt you, no matter how many times you tell him that you’ve had worse hairdos from fingers with much less care for your scalp. Billy grins and chuckles, but he’s gentle nonetheless.
When he’s done, you run your fingertips over the braids to feel the shape of them, a sunny smile growing on your face. You push yourself up, pressing your soft lips to the underside of his jaw and feeling the scratch of his stubble as you kiss him. “Thank you. They’re beautiful.”
And you aren’t just humoring Billy. Your hair is very long even in braids, you hold up your neat-tresses to look at his handiwork. He just shrugs, ever humble, and smiles shyly. “I try. Only the best for you.”
When you leave him, swimming home for the day, you gush to all your sisters about Billy and his calloused fingers in your hair, his sailing and his lazy grin, every bit of your man that makes all of them, your baby sisters and your older ones alike, swoon. They’d all crowd around you to look at the unfamiliar braid, some of them even complaining in friendly-jealousy for a man to braid their own hair. You could only smile and shrug, saying, “He treats me well.”
Truly, he treated you better than well. Billy treated you like a princess. Billy was a treasure you got to keep all to yourself, something to be swooned and jealous over. Something for you, and nobody else. It was safe to say that Billy did your hair much more often after that.
And equally safe to say that your sisters begged for more stories and details of the handsome, sweet, “knightly” human man that doted on their brave sister.
#btw think Billy would definitely appreciate the way braids show off more of your chest and body#he would just think you’re so so beautiful not even sexually#billy the kid#billy the kid x reader#tom blyth#billy the kid fanfiction#billy the kid pirate au#pirate billy x mermaid reader#billy the kid x you#billy the kid 2022#william h bonney x reader#francescas anthology#billy the kid imagines
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All of the Bridgerton siblings are queer in some way, the degrees vary between each of them respectively. No, I will not debate any further, that family is gay as hell and I'm here for it.
#bridgerton#finding out that colin is/could be demisexual was not on my bingo card#welcome to the club buddy#“not all of them have to be queer-” says YOU & this isn't about you so move#daphne...she's bi but i see her preferring to be with men (and that's okay & doesn't diminish her sexuality 🗣🔊)#if you can't handle more than one queer character in the same media that says a lot about you & maybe u should keep that to yourself#anthony bridgerton#benedict bridgerton#colin bridgerton#daphne bridgerton#eloise bridgerton#francesca bridgerton#lqbtq
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I can’t wait to see Francesca and Michaela’s story, but while we’re waiting? I can’t wait to see Michaela queer mentor Eloise and show her that lesbianism exists.
#you can’t tell me this won’t happen#eloise will certainly learn more about the world lol#(not like ~with~ michaela obviously but because of her)#like “oh damn i didn’t realize i could be a rake too#michaela eloise and francesca queering up the scottish countryside#bridgerton#bridgerton headcanon#bridgerton s3#bridgerton spoilers#michaela stirling#francesca bridgerton#eloise bridgerton#franchaela
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I've been trying to phrase things eloquently and I really can't so here you go. Part two really felt like it was trying have its cake and eat it as well in a lot of ways, and it really didn't work.
You give Cressida a whole redemption arc and friendship and put her in an impossible situation and humanise and make you sympathise with her, then want me to hate her again?
You show how Pen uses LW as a coping mechanism and how it's not good for her or those around her and not have her drop it?
You want LW revealed to the ton but no real consequences?
You double down on how Pens family treat her only to have them all come together and be forgiven at the end?
You sideline Colin in his own damn season and butcher Penelope so badly I almost wanted less of her as well?
You can't have everything. Not in such a short time span at least, and it really suffer from it. If you wanted to give Cressida more depth and expend on her role why was she tossed away like nothing at the end? Why did Eloise abandon her? Why was she treated as awful in part two after being put in an actual horror show of a situation? I know they needed the blackmail plot but you can't just give her depth, make her the antagonist and then drop her storyline in the drain that's not how that works. That's not complexity that's laziness, and laziness they created mind you.
They didn't have to write Cressida the way they did this season, if they wanted to make it easy they could have had her marry off screen between seasons to a rich man, they could have had Eloise befriending her be a mistake and had a different arc there, they could have had her LW claim be for any number of reasons, and her blackmail because she still has it out for Penelope. They added this to the story, and as much as I was sceptical at first (I have seen far too many botched bully redemptions) I was glad they did it aded a lot of depth and character interaction, it created some interesting parallels between Cressida and Penelope and seeing Eloise in a different, less intimate friendship with someone who, ironically, is a lot more open with her was interesting. Incomplete, but interesting. It was good, or it could have been. But you can't just turn like that and have it still work. You can't just have Eloise abandon her and have it treated as the right thing to do. You can't leave her with that ending and consider it a happy one. You can't have your cake and eat it too. You didn't create a complex antagonist, you created a scared lost girl who was cruel because she was taught to be and you left her to burn.
You could have had Penelope and Cressida talk to each other, could have explored the ways the mirror and the ways they differ. You could have had Penelope struggle, but untimely empathise with Cressida and help her out, she could have forgiven her for her years of torment because she of all people understands why she did it. You could have had her forgiveness mirror Colin and Eloise forgiving her for LW. You could have looked at how Cressida's openness helped her friendship with Eloise and how Penelope might start to incorporate it. About how by nature of Cressida's openness Eloise is learning to see other perspectives and listen more even if she still has work. You could have done so much with female friendship and camaraderie and empathy and you just... didn't.
The Lady Whistledown this season was just... I think I have a thesis which is most of my thoughts on Polin.
Whistledown was meant to be the subplot to the Polin storyline, not the other way around.
Putting aside my own wishes to have her end Whistledown for her character and for her and Colins relationship, and her love of Colin, her continuing it isn't unexpected I was afraid of this and thought it might happen even if it's lazy. If that was it and if it was handled better I think I could begrudgingly live with it. But it's not. Not only was it handled so so poorly it was the whole second part and for what? Part one was Polin. Part two was Lady Whistledown drama with some cute Polin moments sprinkled in-between with some mandatory angst. Tell me the resolution to Colins arc now. Quickly. You can't he didn't have one, we barley even saw him through Episode seven and eight. There is so much romance in your purpose being the person you love, IF and only IF, it's reciprocal. Penelope literally says in season two, when she has been Whistledown for over a bloody year that she hasn't found her purpose yet. They were meant to find each other. To both have their writing as their passion and creativity and fulfilment, not Whistledown, but her manuscripts, his stories from around the word their joint and secret words. But their centre, their purpose, their guiding light was always meant to be each other. It's what kept Penelope sitting at that window, it's what draw Colin to her at every ball. They had all the potential and set up to be the most beautiful, genuine, heartfelt relationship. But no.
Colin deserved to be angry. The woman he loves has lied, has hurt him, has his from him after all the times he was venerable with her and so, so much more. They deserved to argue. Penelope deserved to be more upset over this than crying in the moment and walking past him later. That's the man she loves, who she thinks hates her, who she know if he did hate her she would deserve it and she wouldn't blame him for a second. They deserved time and space and Colin deserved explanations and apologies. They deserved a later, happier wedding, they both deserved to have their feelings heard and said and listened too. Is that not the core of their relationship? Listening to and seeing each other? Would that not lay the groundwork for some really good well earned conflict and a really rewording resolution? The groundwork was all there that's what's killing me. The set up was all there for something so good which is why I was excited. I know screen time is limited, I know there is only so many emotional conversations you can have on screen, but Bridgerton primarily just people talking on conversations, when it's there bloody season surely they can space out the conversations that need to happen in a way that works with pacing. And to be honest, the screen time defence only works when the screen time that they did have was allocated well. And I'm not taking subplots. Even if I think a few could have been trimmed, the screen time Polin did get was just used so so badly. Colin got dust and that didn't even feel like Penelope had the time, just a mouth piece for the writers.
Rapid fire stuff because I need to expand on the above in more detail later lol.
The acting was flawless give everyone on that set their flowers.
I really like the Mondrich's and seem to be the only one who likes seeing them lol, their sweet and always a good time they just need a better storyline, or you know, one that actually has a resolution.
Not what I would have done for Benedict and I still want to see him look at art again but let's hope season 4 is better lol.
Don't like the way Penelope's family stuff was done, specifically Portia but it is what I thought would happen. Disappointed but not surprised. I'm biased tho so I won't speak on it too much. I lose too much objectivity.
Hate hate hate the baby thing tho, it was fine as a subplot with her sisters but her having the boy was predictable and also dear god the girls nineteen for fucks sake. No. Hated that.
Francesca the absolute love of my life. I adore her and John, I liked the conflicted with Violet, loved everything about her storyline this season she was perfect, my favourite part honestly lol. Also Michaela Stirling get behind me NOW. Sapphic Bridgerton fans truly are the bravest soldiers cause istg. Also I don't trust this fandom with any actor or actresses period but especially not a Black actress who's "ruining" your favourite storyline. So I will be greatly enjoying everything I see of all three of them Francesca John and Michaela, while watching with a sharp eye for any bullshit.
Kate, also the love of my life it was so lovely to have her back even if just for a bit. Wish they did more with Anthony especially him and Colin tho, but again, wasn't expecting much more. I do wish they would write them out with a bit more subtly tho it's getting almost funny how obvious it is.
The Violet, Marcus, Lady Danbury plot I didn't actually mind. Could have been trimmed a bit but it was good seeing the adults in more depth, I haven't watched queen Charlotte tho so I kinda feel like I missed some things.
Overall, I liked certain parts of this season I really did, especially if I fully ignore the context, and I'm happy for everyone who enjoyed it truly, but it was have an entirely different ending in my head. I'll definitely write about at some point but who knows if anyone wants to see that lol.
#bridgerton s3#bridgerton#bridgeton spoilers#penelope featherington#colin bridgerton#eloise bridgerton#cressida cowper#francesca bridgerton#john stirling#michaela stirling#polin#lady whistledown#part 2#more disappointed than anything even if I'm not all together surprised#oh well#all that's to be done is bitch and complain while writing fix it fics I won't publish and looking forward to the future#they just...deserved better#I knew the attempt to simplify Pen in order to glorify her for the masses would have consequences#knew the sidelining of Colin and the rampant loss of comprehension and compassion for him would come back to bite#Penelope my darling Colin my love this isn't you.#all the spinning was cute tho#I wasn't even that attached to the books ffs I found the show first#I'm 100% fine with changes I don't care less just make them well written
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I don't usually go here on the bridgerton side of tumblr but MICHAELA STIRLING??? THEY GENDERBENT THE MICHAEL??? THEY'RE MAKING MY FAVORITE BRIDGERTON GIRL BI?????
#BISEXUALITY? IN MY REGENCY ERA NETFLIX SERIES?#mORE LIKELY THAN YOU THINK#HALLELUJAH MY FAVORITE BRIDGERTON GIRLIE IS JUST LIKE ME FR#long live franchesca#but also damn her season is gonna be really sad#bridgerton#bridgerton spoilers#bridgerton season 3#francesca bridgerton
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Valentina ♡
Francesca ♡
#More Francesca for you#Now some Valentina#Valentina#Francesca#Cat#grey tabby#Tabby cat#Grey tabby cat#cat kitty cat cat kitty cat cat#Kitten#Kitty#Cute Cat#Angry cat#my cats are the best#My cats#Cats#cats of world
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if you're going to queerbait,do it like bridgerton: create two extremely queer coded characters and then give the actual queer romance storyline to a completely left field third character because guess WHAT??? gayness knows no bounds and has no face,anyone can be a homo!!
#that being said francesca my baby i didn't know i could love you any more#also it's a win for ME i didn't like michael at all#bridgerton#bridgerton spoilers#francesca bridgerton
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waaaaa they took away my male lead in the Only Straights Show from 2-3 seasons from now and made him a girl for some sort of WOKE AGENDA they're changing my badly written misogynist book series woe is me we need more straight rep!!! this is because i like their story not for any other reason!!! i'm bi as well!!! more straight romance!!!! no nonconformity!!!! the books!!!!!!!
#bridgerton#bridgerton spoilers#can y'all shut up they're doing something interesting#so the motivations behind the romance will have to change and? if ur so desperate for the book read it#isn't it interesting to you being given alternate stories?#'what about the estate what about the want for a child being the only reason she wanted to remarry'#what about sapphic guilty pining huh. don't we deserve something too? like brimsley/reynolds did not get a happy ending#its almost guaranteed that benedict's bisexuality will be brushed aside again (as much as it will still be part of him#i really feel that they will ignore it after he meets sophie)#i feel like francesca was the best story to do this to#because the core of guilty pining and hell they can still have her looking for a husband so she can have a child!! and michaela loving he#and knowing she can't ever give fran what she wants but still staying by her side like isn't that compelling!!!!#whatever. don't contact me abt this so many people being upset abt this as if this show was ever more than a loose adaptation#ratspeaks#the only valid concerns are the ones worried abt the actress being harassed
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Keonhee playing with his new little son plushie because he loves him so so much
#foroneus#lucieblr#forfreddy#oneus#keonhee#my lunar bunny 🐇🎑#USlives#kflops#kpopccc#nugudomedit#dailybg#malegroupsnet#ultkpopnetwork#Ok Google how to be a plushie pls#I officially hate him I'm going to unstan /j#he's too mean to me he should get arrested 😔#Alexa play Io Vivrò Senza Te because I'm a clown and I'll never let him go 🤡#maybe if I think harder I'll turn into his plushie and live into his pocket forever who knows 🤡#excuse me if I pretend it eh did you see how he snuggles on it?! BRO#BRO IS THE PLUSHIE YOUR PARTNER NOW?#yes it is ofc but eh he's treating it as his gf I'm not joking#Alexa play Non È Francesca because I'm in denial 🤡#the plushie got more love smh 🤡#teresgifs
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To the Bridgerton s3 haters that say that Colin and Penelope feel "forced":
What about them feels forced? 'Forced' implies that they don't feel 'natural' or 'right' or that it shouldn't have happened the way it did(or wouldn't have happened realistically as some of you seem to think). What about them is forced?!
Does it feel "forced" for a person to realize how much someone in their life truly means to them and them falling in love with them in the process? Does it feel "forced" to watch 2 people with friendship and history grow towards each? Are you that rotted from emotionally stunted assholes being worshipped in media that it feels forced to watch a man be an open book of emotions?
OR
Does it feel forced because you are not used to (or comfortable) seeing a plus-size woman be desired? Is it forced because you think it's not realistic for a conventionally attractive man to fall in love with and (intensely) desire a plus-size woman? Do "Francesca and John have more chemistry" because they feel more developed and romantic or because they have a conventionally attractive, skinny white woman at the center of it?
I think a lot of this "Penelope and Colin feel forced and have no chemistry" hate doesn't come from where people think it does. The fat phobia is SHOWING
#bridgerton#colin x penelope#colin bridgerton#nicola coughlan#your fatphobia is showing#john kilmartin#francesca bridgerton#john kilmartin is onscreen for 15 minutes TOPS#you can love what we've seen of them#but to say they're less forced and have more chemistry????#mad
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fuck it, gonna do it myself since the showrunners refuse to
Colin Bridgerton Background and Headcanons
+Colin was a chubby child, but became super lanky around his pre-teens, just before he went to Eton
+He would play piano with Francesca for Mum. He always wanted to play and sing for Papa, too, but Edmund was usually with Anthony and Benedict. Still, he and Fran would sit on the shorter velvet cushion so they could reach the pedals, and they would take turns singing silly made up songs, or church hymns
+Because of his age, he was always excluded from the 'Boys' club of the family. At ten years younger than his older brothers, and not an Heir OR the Spare, this is when he started getting particularly close with his sisters, El, Daph, and Fran. He and Daphne were almost inseparable growing up.
+Colin got SEVERAL makeovers from his sisters. They always said he was just as pretty as they were, and powdered him with too much blush, bribing him with extra snacks if he wore one of their dresses. He did, of course. Those Tea Parties were fancy affairs, after all. Once, Eloise tried to braid his hair for it, too, but it was just too short
+Of all his siblings, Colin is the only one Papa ever punished physically. After Colin hit Eloise and Papa saw, he horsewhipped him in the stable. Colin is a boy, soon to be a man, Papa said, he should never lay a hand on a lady, *any* lady. Colin wonders why he cannot hit a lady, but anyone can hit him. It's the start of his hero complex and his martyr streak, too. He does not matter in the scenario, others do. He can get hurt, but others cannot.
+It's not three months after Edmund dies that Colin is sent to Eton. He's the only boy in their entire family to ever go there, and the prestige of Oxford was just unnecessarily for a third son. The funds were already put aside, Colin's traveling trunk packed, and the first year paid out. He had no choice. As a lanky, scrawny, barely 5 feet tall 12 year old boy, Colin leaves everything he has ever known behind to mourn in private, on his own, far from anything familiar
+Eton has. . .to say problems would be an understatement. Colin is under the tutelage of the harshest superintendent of the century for only one year toward the end, but it is far more than enough. The treatment is horrible. (look it up, this is historically accurate!). 'Flogging Fridays' were so harrowing, the uprisings by the students ended in stalemates and fury. In that last year, Colin had long hit his growth spurt, and resented a bully deep, *deep* in his bones. In his last year at Eton, Colin broke so many windows in the uprising that for days after, he was picking glass shards out from his clothes
+His first year at Eton was hard. Colin was small and alone and had no one in his corner. He made friends with some others, but for the most part, he was an easy target for the older boys to pick on. His name couldn't shield him from that. Being so small, even when he tried to fight back, he wasn't very successful, and most times, they would report him for violence anyway, so his choices were two fold- sit down and take it, or square up
+Colin learns to box at Eton. It isn't encouraged, surely, but one of his classmates noticed how Colin was very much not having a good time and put two and two together. He was older, a bit fatherly, almost, even though he wasn't even 18, yet. It was his last year so he was less concerned with doing things as the world expected it. Colin followed him around like a little duckling. Everywhere James went, Colin went. They sat with each other to eat dinner, then would sneak off to spar and train. He was Colin's first crush. He never told anyone, but he *is* grateful
+When Colin comes home for the first time, he *knows* everything is different. There's already a rift forming. Colin becomes a haunt in the hallway, only there in the summers and for holiday breaks. Colin becomes a ghost, half seen, wandering Aubrey Hall. Mama is over the moon, of course, as over the moon she can be still deep in grief, as is Daphne, but Fran is quieter, now, and Eloise turns away from him, frustrated at his freedoms when she gets none. Anthony has no time for him, save to ask if his studies are well, and Benedict is busy taking care of the babs
+Colin's favorite place to be when he was home was with Hyacinth. He'd sneak into the nursery and gently hold her. Though there were nurses, Colin was there so often, they swore she never cried. The truth was, Hy cried often, but Colin would notice the signs and comfort her. It made him feel better, to know there was something in this world that might need him. No one else needed him. Not Mama, not his sisters, certainly not his brothers. So, he rocks the baby sister he barely knows, and he sings her lullabies, and he cries with her, sometimes, and he's just a little less alone
+He's 14 by the time he finally starts gaining height. A late bloomer, a professor or two teases. They thought it would never come, really. He'd been a been pole for as long as anyone could remember, ever since he turned 6, but all of a sudden, he looked almost skeletal. Shooting up near an entire foot was awful. For a lot of people in his life, this was the first they'd seen him be openly miserable and snappish. Sore and frustrated, Colin had the shortest fuse he'd ever had. Oh, he had a temper. Always did. But he typically knew how to reign it in. During his growing pains, it was impossible. This is the manifest of him not sharing his food- he was constantly ravenous, and lord help anyone trying to get between him and his plate
+Colin first meets Penelope when he's 16, filled out and coming into his own, an insta-crush for Penelope, but for Colin? First thing he thought after her bonnet knocked him off his horse is that she looked like a peach. All round and pink and in her yellow dress. Colin likes peaches. So Colin likes her. It was simple as that for him
+He never got into Eloise's rivalry about Penelope. Honestly, he didn't think about her very often. Penelope seemed sweet, but she was near silent. Eloise would tell him that she wasn't that way with her, as though bragging, and Colin just shrugged. He didn't have any real interest or investment in their friendship, but he did try to be polite. The one time, Penelope stood in front of him and tried to say something for an entire minute, only to squeak and thrust out a book at him, turning tail and making off. He found it surprisingly funny. She opened up to him slowly, got more comfortable in increments, but he thinks back to that moment and remembers that she's come a long way. Would be nice to see where they end up (forshadowinggggg)
+Colin doesn't like to drink. Never carried a torch for the taste, really, but other men did it, and only in drinking did they seem to have any semblance of closeness. Colin tries it for himself. It never really works out
+Charm becomes a second skin to hide himself in. Deflecting questions to other people, remembering details about them and bringing them up, asking questions and using humor. Funny how humor lands so much easier, now. At Eton, he had no protection. (No wonder he despises a bully) But now, he was grown. Now, he was a 'man'. A conventionally attractive man (he can't really deny it). He's tall and he's finally started filling out broad and big, and he uses it to his advantage. When he talks, in his mind, somewhere, he's still that 5 foot tall boy, crying in the carriage to an unfamiliar place or grinning and bearing it his first year at school. But this time, he has a cloak to wrap around himself. This time, yes, he's softhearted and tender, but he is also beautiful and knows how to focus on someone else, and he uses it to his advantage.
+Colin understands this privilege, because for a time, he knew what it was like without it. Colin sees what happens to those who do not have it, also. For Colin, charm is the sprinkle of honey over his bitter fears and concerns. For Colin, charm is the fun party hat everyone gets to see- not that he's sad, not that he's conflicted, not that he's unsure. He's pretty. That's enough for them
+But it isn't enough for HIM. Colin grapples with his purpose because the idea that he should be content to be attractive and well off and nothing else sits unpleasantly with him. Colin wants to be a self-made man, but he is denied the opportunity. So he tries to navigate the world as it is around him, having been pre-molded and determined to a certain outcome.
+So, Colin's arc is about becoming a Man, but he is not a conventional one, so he works from example. What do Men do? Colin certainly didn't have his father to inform him, so he relies on the other men around him. Well. . .Men visit brothels and have mistresses and drink whiskey and go to clubs, but Colin doesn't want to go to a brothel, and he doesn't desire a mistress, and whiskey burns when it goes down, acrid as the smoke thick and smoggy in the clubs. So. . .what else? Well, Men get married. Men take care of a family. Men are educated.
he can do THAT
+Colin attempts to marry in Season 1 not because he is fully infatuated (he likes Marina, sure, but his eagerness is not just rooted in such) but because he is attempting to find purpose. To find meaning. To be a Man, a GOOD man. And Good Men are married, so Colin will be married. Good Men take care of their family, so Colin takes care of his family, so Colin offers to BE her family. But because these are rooted in aimless endeavors (Colin wants to be A man, but not THE man he envisions for himself), they fall apart. Now, Penelope certainly has a hand in it falling to pieces, but Colin didn't really have the right motivations to start off with, so in season 2. . .
+He's depressed. It's odd to me that others would describe season 2 as an arc in which Colin is successful. The entire time, he is in a deep depression. Colin partakes in drugs, specifically to not think about the world, or to find peace and comfort. Colin claims that no one wants to hear his stories, even if he thinks he did everything right by traveling. (Remarkable. . .yes, in the sense that I have many remarks of it). Colin drinks even though he clearly hates it, gets migraines, hangovers, grimaces at the taste, because he is looking for ESCAPE
+But Colin cannot escape. Even on a different continent, even having run, there is no where to go. His escape is not from the ton, and not even necessarily from reality, but from his own insecurities. From what he feels are his inadequacies. Good Men are married, but in Colin's mind, he abandoned Marina. Good Men take care of their family, and Colin left his. Good Men are educated, and Colin is tripping on shrooms in the middle of Cyprus, looking at the stars, wondering what he's meant to do with himself. Colin's desires to escape are deeply rooted, but Colin doesn't want to escape a PLACE. He's done that for a long time. No, Colin wants to escape a PERSON. Himself. The himself he knows himself as
+So, instead, it's easier to be someone else. Himself is messy and sensitive and needs to rehearse what he says. Himself doesn't ever say the right thing (doesn't know how) and is boring to everyone else, besides. Himself is too painful, so it's easier to be Charming Colin. Helpful Colin. Colin taking down a scheme. Colin providing for others. Because he does not matter in it. They do.
+But he DOES. Season 3 sees Colin masquerading. Successfully, of course, but nonetheless. He's half settled into himself and half settled into the persona. When Penelope gives him the cold shoulder with no explanation? Persona. When Eloise avoids him? Persona. When Fran is getting trussed up like a calf for auction on the marriage mart? Persona. Colin spends so much of his life trying to be someone else
+And then he finds out Penelope is Whistledown, and the betrayal of it rips all his talent from him. He can no longer be Happy Colin, Smiling Colin, Here, I'll Help Colin- no, now he is just angry. Sad. Upset. Hurt. Conflicted. He can only be COLIN, and he does not want her to see. Does not want her to reveal it to everyone else, that the man they saw was a sham, that deep down, he is still that boy, that boy Marina said he was, that boy chasing dreams and fantasies, that boy curled up in the cupboard, sobbing about losing his dad, that empty, hollow boy, able to offer up nothing but charm
+But they will see. She will see. And he will see, too. Just who Colin really is. Just who he can be. And just how full and rich and wonderful the reality really is, mess and all
#colin bridgerton#polin#penelope featherington#bridgerton season 3#eloise bridgerton#daphne bridgerton#violet bridgerton#francesca bridgerton#if you want it done you gotta do it yourself i guess#[cue mom voice]#no one helps me in this house#anyway hi yes it's me your resident colin fan feral for more of his content#i would say the water's just fine but girl we are STRUGGLING out here#penelope is his mess but he's ours and i love all of it
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