#Midnight thoughts

[moo-blogging]

Nothing in my head but Levi's sleeping pattern changed when he's with you.

He had a hard time sleeping. He would rather stay up all night doing anything at all, work, domestic chores, or watching the city slowly going to sleep as he struggled to alone with his thoughts.

He would often pass out in whatever he was wearing. He never had any pyjamas or sleeping clothes. He usually woke up on the balcony chair or the sofa. The bed he got was merely a useful decoration. He still changed the sheets every once in a while just to keep things clean.

But when you moved in with him, his habits changed. He started to have sleeping clothes (clothes that you liked to see him in at home), he lied on the bed every day, and sometimes managed to fall asleep with you. He was a light sleeper. Any small noise could wake him up. A distant traffic noise, or a drunk neighbor's slamming the door, Levi would jolt awake.

As time went, the time he woke up in the middle of the night reduced. And he would yawn when it was about bedtime. It didn't cross your mind then, but Levi would usher you to bed and occasionally fell asleep first as he held you in his arms. Your steady breathing next to him was a soothing melody. Without waking up, Levi knew how to hold you close no matter how you twisted and turned in your sleep.

One morning when you woke up first, you watched Levi sleeping peacefully next to you. Shirtless, he was sleeping on his back. He had one arm on you while another on his chest. You realised he no longer slept with his arms crossed on his chest. You snuggled closer to him, and he welcomed you even in his sleep. He loved you even subconsciously.

[septemberkisses]

September - a soft goodbye to summer, whispered gently by the rustling leaves of autumn.

Excerpts from:

The Letters of Sylvia Plath by Sylvia Plath • The Return of the King by J.R.R. Tolkien • Song of the Simple Truth: The Complete Poems of Julia de Burgos by Julia de Burgos • Peggy Toney Horton • The Whole Story and Other Stories by Ali Smith • Albert Campus • To The Tune 'Soaring Clouds by Huang O. (tr. by Kenneth Rexroth & Ling Chung) • September by Earth, Wind and Fire

[cryinglookingatsoulages]

kavinsky wanted to be ronans gay awakening so bad not aware that ronans gay was never even asleep to begin with.

[radfemsiren]

There’s something so specific about female oppression that makes you acutely aware of being a small part of a bigger phenomenon.

I’m not an Asian woman, but there’s a profound disturbance I feel when I see an Asian sister become degraded for the crime of being woman. I feel a deep hatred for sex tourism and fetishization, for maids being treated like commodities and having their passports withheld from them. I feel my stomach wretch when I see a picture of Junko Furuta, when I heard those male Japanese politicians laugh at raising the age of consent in pornography. There’s something wrong happening to my sisters out there.

I’m not a black woman but I feel a deep ugly pit in my stomach when I see the interviews of Sudanese women escaping rape and starvation in the desert. When I saw that video of Cassie Ventura running from Diddy in the hallway, when I hear her screams and know his power and influence protected him for so many years. When I see the family portraits of Sonya Massey and her children, and I know there can be no future ones ever created. There’s something wrong happening to my sisters.

I’m not a woman who is disabled. I’m not a woman in a domestically abused relationship. I’m not a prostituted woman. I’m not a trafficked woman. I’m not locked away right now. Everything that happened to me is in my past… I have freedom and autonomy now… I can just move on and forget about the worldwide phenomenon of female pain. But I know I can’t. There’s a terrible gnawing.

Growing up Muslim we always were taught that the Muslim nation is called the Ummah. The Ummah must operate as one body. I was taught many times that if anyone in the Ummah at any time is in pain, the body is restless, and can’t sleep… even the smallest prick of a finger can keep you wide awake, aware of the pain. They always said it like that, holding up a finger. Just, the smallest, prick.

There’s a sickness happening in the worldwide body of women, and it keeps me awake at night. There’s anger and defensiveness I feel when a woman is the butt of a mean joke. There’s bitter resentment I feel when I see men get special treatment that I know a woman would be crucified for. I feel anger so often. When I see little girls being stabbed in the news. When I see girls starving in Palestine. When I see girls forced to wear hijab and stay home in Afghanistan. Sudan. Yemen. Iran. Egypt. Honduras. Femicide. Rape. Forced birth. Menstrual huts. FGM. So many ugly words, so many tainted countries.

Sometimes I worry that too much anger might poison me over time…but what can I do about my sisters? There isn’t a finger prick upsetting my body, there’s gaping wounds, pulsing and bleeding out. I cant sleep like that… Sometimes I hold onto my body when I’m alone, with that sickening knowledge what while it does everything it possibly can to keep me alive and safe, women all over are suffering for having the same exact body. Sometimes I would hate my body in the past. Knowing that certain things only happened to me for the crime of having a female body. But now I hold onto it, grateful it keeps me alive and breathing, and I try to ignore that gnawing at the back of my mind while I try to sleep.

[fairy-switchblade]

you know when a butch goes in for a cuddle and they put their head onto your shoulder and your instincts take over and you go to gently scratch their fuzzy head, and you know how in that moment you have never felt so soft in your entire life

[evermorepeyton]

do you think 18 year old dan, after coming back home from his first trip meeting phil, went to bed, stared at the ceiling in the dark and wondered…. made up little scenarios in his head before falling asleep… about their futures?

do you think he pictured them one day living together and going on vacation together and smiled to himself in the dark? do you think he thought “i want this to be my forever so badly”?

do you think he saw flashes of their futures and hoped it wouldn’t slip away as his consciousness faded onto a deep slumber?

or am i too much of a ROMANTIC for thinking about this?

[lenichque]

the concept of cherik coffee shop aus is so funny to me for some reason like yes let that loser with a phd make cappuccinos sure why not world economy is in shambles it’s only fair

[adriwithae]

Sometimes I wonder if we had seen Todd from Neil's perspective we would have known truly how much of a catalyst that boy was

Like Todd broke out of his father's abuse and emotional torment through Neils encouragement

Neil succumbed easier to his father's abuse because he threatened the two things that where his and his alone:

Acting & Todd Anderson

[classycoffeesublime]

I hate the way touch makes me feel, but after drunkenly lying in your arms, they are all I crave for, body and soul.

[nell0-0]

The power rangers but it's just Four split in the colors + Shadow. That is all.

[inked-up-gentleman]

Not to sound slutty but I would fold your laundry for you

[moo-blogging]

Nothing in my head, but Levi trying PDA for the first time.

It was snowing. The air was chilly, and the wind stung your face as you braced through the cold. Most of the cadets were back home to celebrate Christmas, but a few of you stayed back to stand by (and of course, without a home to go back to).

Nanaba, Miche, Levi and you were tasked to shop for some extra food for the Christmas and Levi's birthday celebration. Although you insisted that Levi should stay back but he came anyway. You were fresh in your relationship with Levi. Only Erwin and Miche were suspecting you were together, but Levi never said anything about it and you hesitated to tell.

After the cashier rang up everything, Nanaba was busy counting the change, you stood by the side of the road, each hand carrying a bag of goods, staring at the bakery's display window. There was a diversity of cakes, breads, tarts and fruit danishes on showcase. The window is slightly fogged up with the warmth of the fresh baked goods, and the sweet aroma of freshly baked danishes seeped through the slit of the door.

There was not enough budget for a cake large enough for all the cadets that stayed back, so it was decided to settle for butter cookies instead. Miche was paying up for the cookies inside the bakery. You could see his silhouette inside by the cashier, making small talks about something.

Just then, you felt a palm slid into yours. You turned to find Levi standing next to you, staring at the bakery's window as well. Your palm in the thin glove could feel the warmth of Levi's skin. You looked down to make sure what you felt was real. And yes, he was holding your hand in public. Levi squeezed your palm and you looked up at him. He was watching you with his head tilted to the side. "Anything you want from here?" He nodded his head toward the bakery.

"N-no, we've got everything." You swallowed nervously. Levi's eyes bore into yours, "not from the list for the brats, anything you want from the bakery?" You felt your cheeks heat up and you averted your gaze from his face toward the bakery.

"I'm fine!" You blurted out too fast. From your side eye, you could see Levi nodded. Before you could react, Levi took the bag from your hand and turned around. Nanaba, who was standing behind you, was stunned by what she just saw. Levi took another bag from you and walked away. You quietly followed behind. Miche exited the bakery and raised his eyebrows at Nanaba.

Nanaba mouthed "I saw them holding hands!" Miche eyes widened in surprise, shrugged and said "you owe my 5 bucks, Nanaba."

[septemberkisses]

On Mothers and Pain - Collected Works #1

— her pain was mine, but mine not hers.

Excerpts from-

Autumn Sonata by Ingmar Bergman • On Earth We're Briefly Gorgeous by Ocean Vuong • Letter to my Rage: An Evolution by Lidia Yuknavitch • honeytuesday • sixisockets • La Flor de Lis by Elena Poniatowska • The Unbearable Lightness of Being by Milan Kundera • The Unfinished World and Other Stories by Amber Sparks • A Mother's Hate by Sam Gordon • Salt by Nayyirah Waheed

[howidraw]

Just saw How Do You Live (Boy and the Heron). In short, it delivered but this isn't a review, we're chatting about a single animator. Avoiding all trailers I was surprised to see this opening scene:

That's definitely Shinya Ohira, I thought.

Often I wonder about the process of an artist bringing a concept to reality. Starting life as an idea, it gets filtered, drained and blemished through the process of reaching the audience.

When I see Ohira's scenes I become aware of my heartbeat as if it's synchronizing with his.

Though I first saw his work on Akira, this short from the Animatrix was THE ONE. I still call it "Ya Know, The Skateboard Kid" and people know exactly what I'm talking about.

Ohira's opening scene in How Do You Live was left uncorrected which worked with the nightmarish atmosphere of the sequence. I'd imagine bringing his work on-model has to be hell.

You're watching an anime and suddenly, THAT SCENE pops up. Kill Bill, Howl's Moving Castle, Ping Pong, you know the ones.

In animation, they want you to stay on-model, keep the show cohesive, but speaking as one that works in the industry, I want to be seen.

You're watching something and get asked, "Wanna see something really cool?" and you get this crazy animation flex. I want to see artist go wild. Gimme THAT SCENE!

[itsscottiesstark]

Wouldn't it be great if Tumblr had a feature like "3 years ago today" or something? Like, imagine waking up one morning, opening the app and there's a huge banner saying "Let's see what you were up to 5 years ago today!" and you click on it and it's the most unhinged, thirsty, shameful post about the same middle aged actor you are still obsessed with.

[changbeansss]

Little Bird

Pairings: Dad!Bang Chan x reader

Genre: Angst with comfort, fluff, domestic

Warnings: None

W/c: 1485

A/N: I highly recommend the song 'Little Bird' by Jonas Brothers. This story is highly inspired by that song. Hope you like it! I nearly forgot I had this in my drafts ToT

It was just past 3 AM, the house wrapped in the stillness of night. You stirred in your sleep, sensing an unusual emptiness beside you. Slowly waking, you reached out, but the space where Chan usually lay was cold.

Concerned, you slipped out of bed and padded softly down the hallway. As you neared the living room, the faint sound of music reached your ears. Curious and slightly worried, you peeked around the corner.

There he was, sitting on the couch with your newborn daughter cradled gently on his chest. Chan's eyes were closed, tears streaming down his cheeks as he held her close, listening to "Little Bird" by the Jonas Brothers playing softly from his phone.

The scene before you was so tender, so beautiful, that it brought tears to your own eyes. You quietly walked over and sat beside him, resting your head on his shoulder. He opened his eyes and looked at you, a mixture of love and joy filling his gaze.

"She's perfect," he whispered, his voice thick with emotion. "I can't believe she's ours."

You smiled, wiping a tear from his cheek. "She is," you agreed, placing a gentle kiss on your daughter's tiny head.

Chan let out a shaky breath, his tears falling freely now. "I never knew I could feel this much happiness," he said. "It's overwhelming."

You wrapped your arms around both of them, feeling the warmth and love radiating from your little family. "We're so lucky," you whispered.

As the song played on, the three of you sat there, basking in the pure, unfiltered joy of the moment. Chan's tears of happiness mingled with yours, a perfect reflection of the love and gratitude you both felt for the little life you had brought into the world.

In that quiet, intimate moment, nothing else mattered. It was just the three of you, together, bound by a love that would last a lifetime.