#Melbourne fringe festival

[inthefallofasparrow]

Only What Remains Is Beautiful

as part of the 2023 MELBOURNE FRINGE FESTIVAL

An original theatre piece by Ty Liebelt, Only What Remains Is Beautiful is an hour-long real-time anecdote; exploring the fog of social trauma and its presence within identity. Imagine a soothsayer. A Tiresias sort of character. They've got all the cosmic wisdom that everyone craves. But they've also got that eccentric awkwardness that no one can tolerate for a second. Now imagine a day when this soothsayer steps out of their cave to discover that The Apocalypse has happened. And they slept through the whole thing! More alone than ever before, our soothsayer sets out on a journey. Where? They haven't the foggiest. Why? They're...still working that out. To find what, exactly? Someone! ANYONE! Just. One. Other. Human. Because despite this empty planet, the soothsayer can still hear voices... Echoes amidst the rubble... Only What Remains Is Beautiful is a uniquely layered, absurdist tale about redefining loneliness. A desperate, bewildered and soul-building pilgrimage to the very literal ends of the earth. Think 'Fleabag' meets Samuel Beckett meets a post-apocalyptic walking simulator video game. Contains mild coarse language, infrequent sexual references, discussion of suicide/self harm, death, war and mental health.

12 - 15 October at THE MC SHOWROOM

[ablubluh]

anyone in Melbourne over the fringe festival PLEASE do yourselves a favour and go see Godz. four of the most beautiful men I've ever seen. balls out. cuntiest cupid/Zeus in the world. I fell in love with Hercules. Apollo was gorgeous. Dionysus also could severely get it. Zeus's phone went off with a grindr notification. high flying routines went crazy. hades also served like the underworld depended on it. 10/10 would go again.

[qnewsau]

Catch these Queer Highlights at the Melbourne Fringe Festival

New Post has been published on https://qnews.com.au/catch-these-queer-highlights-at-the-melbourne-fringe-festival/

Catch these Queer Highlights at the Melbourne Fringe Festival

With so much amazing talent performing in Melbourne for Fringe, we’ve made a list of some of the queer highlights.

We are one week down for the 42nd annual Melbourne Fringe Festival.

In that time, a bevy of queer arts and entertainment burst throughout the city and beyond.

With two more weeks left, we’ve put together a list of some queer highlights you can indulge in.

Over the weekend The Huxley’s shon a queer spotlight on sports, with their interactive art event that will take place again next weekend.

Combining the queer and sporting worlds, we want to capture how it feels to be wearing heels or giant sequin capes for those who may be at odds with athleticism,” Will Huxley told us.

“We want to bring things together that shouldn’t necessarily be on the sporting field.”

Read our full interview with Will Huxley here.

Find out how you be a part of The Winner Takes it All, just like Queer Sporting Alliance did on the weekend here.

COMEDY

Award-winning comedian and aspiring cult leader Maddy Weeks brings a heartwarming and hilarious comedy hour in Never Gonna Die.

They’ll take you on a wild ride through their life, from their best jokes to their secret to eternal life.

Maddie will reveal all in this high-energy show that will leave you feeling unstoppable.

Until 20th October – find out more here.

  Australia’s nastiest nans Edith Vale and Maureen McGillicuddy can’t wait to pull their balls out for you!

There’s nothing quite like a visit from Nana and they are like none you’ve ever met before.

Expect big laughs and fabulous prizes, but make sure you’re on your best behaviour for Granny Bingo.

11th & 18th October – find out more here.

  What if you died, but it was a mistake?

Multiple award winning comedian Andy Balloch, and Justin Porter bring you a queer, absurd, narrative sketch show.

Linda (for one more week) explores what you would do with a bit more time up your sleeve.

Until 20th October – find out more here.

  The art of storytelling meets the thrill of the variety show as Seen & Heard returns to Melbourne Fringe.

Melbourne’s (and the world’s) Fringe variety darlings share intimate stories of their lives alongside the acts they were renowned for.

These artists show a glimpse of themselves beneath the glitter and grease paint.

Fom 9th to 13th October – find out more here.

  A witty, fast-paced satire of magic shows from a queer femme perspective, Assigned Magician At Birth is Tricksy Collins in all her glory.

The trans and neurodiverse femme fatale confronts the idea of deception, illusion and identity.

A hilarious, eye-opening look into the world of magic and doing whatever makes your community, brain and gender happy.

Until 20th October – find out more here.

  CABARET

Think Meow Meow meets Bianca Del Rio on a budget because Tash York’s Happy Hour is performing in Geelong.

In partnership with Regional Arts Victoria, Happy Hour combines drag and cabaret unlike any other.

With York backed by her boozy backing singers The Red Red Wines bring on the powerful 3 part harmonies, hilarious stories, and of course – Goon of Fortune!

October 25th & 26th – find out more here.

  Singapore’s beloved live-singing drag queen, Honey Gluttony invites audiences to join her for her electrifying one-woman show.

A journey of self-discovery and empowerment blended with musical magic, Honey shares her origin.

 Catch her celebrating the resilience and vibrancy of a queer artist’s journey in Gluttony by Night.

October 16th – 20th – find out more here.

  Jetting in from the UK to Stonnington’s So Soiree Grattan Gardens, Dolly Diamond brings the laughs with a bevy of musical friends in tow.

Over two nights Dolly Diamond’s Rather Large Variety Hour welcomes guests including 2joocee, Karen from Finance, Tina Del Twist, DJ Du Jour and more.

Because Dolly’s never afraid to shine the spotlight on others, just as long as it comes beaming back onto her.

October 19th & 20th – find out more here.

  Bisexual Icons Millicent, Jemma and Rosie Russell bring a big, bold evening of cathartic comedy chaos in Bisexual Intellectuals.

Using original music and the transformative power of tap dance, they celebration of queer joy, dismantling bi-phobia with levity and heart.

You’ll laugh, you’ll cry, you might even go home and buy a pair of tap shoes.

Until 13th October – find out more here.

THEATRE

Ash Flanders attempts the impossible – to find a place on Aussie TV for a mouthy middle-aged homosexual with too many opinions.

A Brief Episode is a surreal and surprising 65-minute true story about wild dogs, vapid Australians, generous mothers, selfish children and more.

Where instead of finding structure, Ash loses it entirely.

Until 20th October – find out more here.

  The library is open. So, sit down, be quiet, and listen up!

A response to the rise in reactionary politics around the exposure of children to queerness, Kinder sees Goody read between the lines.

A chaotic interrogation of childhood, memory, and a long overdue examination of what it means to ‘grow up’.

Until 20th October – find out more here.

  Chasing Dick: A Love Story tackles the intergenerational gap in views on sexuality, gender identity, and expression,

When Dick, a larger-than-life transwoman, moves into town and explores the search for connection and understanding within families.

Until 12th October – find out more here.

  Fountain Lakes In Lockdown: A Drag Parody Play explores Melbourne’s foxiest morons got up to during the pandemic.

Relive the uniquely Melburnian pandemic experience parodied by Art Simone, Thomas Jaspers, Leasa Mann and Scott Brennan.

Read our interview with Jaspers and Simone about their national tour here.

Is Kath up to her pussy bow in sourdough?

Until 20th October – find out more here.

  This is just a taste of some of the amazing acts that celebrate and elevate our communities happening as a part of the Melbourne Fringe Festival.

Check out the full program here.

For the latest LGBTIQA+ Sister Girl and Brother Boy news, entertainment, community stories in Australia, visit qnews.com.au. Check out our latest magazines or find us on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram and YouTube.

[pynkhues]

do you any recommendations of what to look out for/things you're excited for for melbourne fringe? i missed it last year because i was working crazy hours but im hoping to see a few things this year but i dont know where to start

Oh, man, yeah, the program is enormous, as it is every year, and honestly it's a challenge to navigate even being a part of the industry, so I totally feel you on not knowing where to start. Ultimately, what you want to see is going to depend on what you're into, so I'm going to put the comedy and cabaret performances to one side, and focus on the theatre program, if that's okay? Just because I can probably speak to it a little better, haha.

SO! Places to start:

Ballkids (or, scenes from a friendship) - love the creative team on this, and I've yet to see anything Liv's been involved in that hasn't blown me away. She is, I think, one of the most exciting emerging theatremakers in Australia right now. Her work tends to run the gamut of emotion from genuinely very funny to gutwrenchingly devastating, and her focus tends to be on specific moments in youth that change, well, everything. I'm really excited to see this one.

I Once Was a Tree - this is puppet theatre, so full disclaimer if that's not your vibe, haha, but I've worked with some of the artists from Bonkel Thetare before and I just love the creative team there too. They're really a great bunch of people and immensely talented, so I think this will be pretty special.

I saw Patrick Livesey in Sirens a couple of years ago (a play he actually did with Liv) and he was really incredible, he's just a really, really talented performer, so I'm really excited to see him in I Hope This Means Something.

Smother's also got a really exciting creative team and sounds really interesting, so I'm hoping to get to that this week.

There's a lot of Sydney talent involved in After Rebecca. I haven't seen it or worked with anyone on it, but I've heard positive things through the grapevine + it's had very good reviews. I love Daphne du Maurier's Rebecca too, so I'm curious as to what this one might be like.

A bit expensive for Fringe (although it's on at the Arts Centre), but I'm hearing quite a bit of buzz about Werewolf. Written by Van Badham too, which is exciting. Her stuff's often very good.

Not All Men - this is being run by a newer company (they were only established last year), but it got some good reviews and hype at Adelaide Fringe earlier in the year, so it sounds like it could be worth checking out.

The We the People x Yarra art exhibit / social history looks awesome and like one of the more exciting free events they're doing.

And just to keep things a little gothic, haha, the adaptation of Edgar Allen Poe's The Black Cat got really good reviews out of Adelaide Fringe too and has been nominated for a few awards already this year. I'm hearing really good things about it, and apparently the music in particular is off the hook.

Hopefully some of these take your fancy!

[yesrandyandy42]

Eva 4 Ever - Spotlight on Bullying

“In a toxic relationship, people fear losing the friendship and being alone.” – Donna De Palma“ While flicking through the Melbourne Fringe program, I was contacted by performer Donna De Palma about her Fringe show, EVA 4 EVER. Donna had a dysfunctional female relationship in her youth, and the lingering wounds inspired her to write a play about it. This made me ponder why she and many others…

[junedenim]

2009

beneath the boardwalk, part 7 (series masterlist)

secret door

warnings: a tad angsty, a tad fluffy, a tad smutty, a sweet tooth, etc.

word count: 10.5k

Alex and I shared his childhood bed. I spent Christmas and New Year's with my family in Bath, but I made the trip up to Sheffield on the 4th of January for Alex's birthday on the 6th. It was a rather unremarkable birthday but it remains one of the coziest. Alex and I thought about going out to drink but his mum made him a cake. After we ate the cake, we were too tired so we played a game of Cluedo with his parents and went to bed.

After this birthday, I realized I enjoyed Alex's birthday more than my own. My birthdays have had the long tradition of ending in dramatics or sadness or just plain boring. The simplicity of Alex's birthdays has always brought me comfort, maybe because he doesn't want a party. He doesn't want to do anything. He just wants to relax and play Cluedo.

When we went to bed that night, we were practically stacked on top of each other. He offered to sleep on the floor because, although we had done the twin bed shuffle before, it never equalled the best sleep. I denied him and said I would. He denied me so I laid half my body on top of him to not fall off the bed.

I combed his hair back. It had grown out in the desert but was softer than ever. His mum made him get a trim, which tamed up the hair, making it fall perfectly as opposed to his faux sideburn days. "How's 23 feel?"

He shrugged and reached a hand up to push my curtain-like hair behind my ear. My hair was getting long too, which I was thankful for because I didn't want to resemble Alex too much. I had grown my fringe out in the desert. My hair looked shaggier than ever but I kind of liked the roughness of it. Maybe that was the part that resembled Alex's hair. "No different than 22," he said.

"I guess we've passed all the fun ages," I sighed. "We're truly adults now."

Alex smiled softly. "That feels weird. I know we've done all these adult things, but actually being referred to as one is still weird."

"I can always account for you being older than me. That's all that matters."

He shook his head, amused by me. "Those 3 months mean a lot to you."

"Yeah, they must have been the worst 3 months of your life."

"Why?"

"'Cause you were living in a world without me."

He kissed me and then said, "That would truly be." A kiss to the cheek. "Hell." A kiss to the neck. "On." A kiss to the right collarbone. "Earth." A kiss to the right breast.

*

In the latter half of January, the band went on a small Australian & New Zealandian tour. I went because what else would I do? The majority of the tour was for the Big Day Out Festival which was hosted in Sydney, Melbourne, Gold Coast, Adelaide, Perth, and Auckland.

Their first show back in Wellington came with the debut of some Humbug songs, which I had already known of through recording and rehearsals. But seeing "Pretty Visitors" live for the first time ever was life-changing, even if Alex did stand awkwardly with his hands in his jacket's pockets. Like Pinocchio came to life, still not adapted to his new body.

I used the label-comped airfare travel to explore rather than attend most of their concerts. The dates were compacted close together so I was the only one out of our crew that got to defrost from the British winter in the Australian sun.

In February, the band was due to return to California to finish the album. Late one night in Perth, Alex asked me, "Are you coming back?"

It had been a deflected point like most things. Pushed off until someone or something made the decision for me. I didn't know what to do. I didn't want to go back to London alone. I didn't want to be in California alone. Ultimately, the business card from Opal stuck in my wallet tipped the scale.

"I think I want to finish it out," I told him.

Excitement flashed in his eyes but he stayed still. "Are you sure? I'll be back before you know it. Everything will be fast. You won't even miss me."

I tugged at him. "Of course, I'll miss you. And you'll be off on tour soon and I like the idea of going with you but you know I can't do a whole tour with you. I have to be independent."

The greatest accomplishment in my life might be Alex's pride in me. I don't know how I earned his belief in me. It was there right from the moment we met and it never dissipated, even when we broke up. His smile flashed with pride then, small, but always proud in the stances I made for myself.

"I know," he said. "And I love being with you but I like hearing what you get up to when I'm away. And it'll be more flexible this time since you're out of school."

"And, maybe, I could get some work out in LA. Just freelance or something. I feel like I just gave up last time and didn't bother with a job. You know, me and complaining."

"Shush, you're opinionated. It's how I like my women."

"Women?"

He corrected, "Woman."

I chuckled and slotted my head on his shoulder. "I think maybe I'll get in touch with Opal. Maybe one day write for the LA Times. Would that make me a traitor?"

"No," he laughed, "just maybe a red coat." The skin near his eyes crinkled up, pleased with his joke. I prayed to make those wrinkles become permanent, for him to live in a lifetime of laughter, specifically from my jokes but I do get a special funny feeling when he's laughing at his own humor. It's like he's patting himself on the back, something he does physically do.

There was a question of giving in too much to Alex. I was chasing a boyfriend through the world, which was okay because I was traveling and exploring too and I wanted to be with him but I always worried about my association with him—clinging too tightly, representing an image of somebody who lived off of him. At times (and eventually), it consumed me.

*

In our rented LA home there was a bay window, which didn't look out on much other than the road and the opposing house. While Alex was at the studio, I sat there and wrote. By that point, I had compiled my essays in a file I called "LA Times." My intention wasn't to submit the works to the LA Times—I had yet to hear back from Opal on any openings—but it was simply something in the works—a digital diary of those past few Californian months.

I had begun submitting work and didn't hear back. I thought of getting a part-time job or babysitting gig, but it felt like a waste of my degree, and Alex had plenty of funds to go around.

Opal and I went out for drinks and it was the first time I went out in LA, independent from Alex. It was fast fun. Opal talked in excessive sweetness but was snarky in response to any disparity toward her.

She seemed so worldly but had never lived anywhere outside of LA. She wasn't any form of a writer but she worked with writers all day and asked if she could look at my work. I was shyly reluctant but she tugged it out of me. Some small 500-word piece I liked.

She gushed about it (and still does) insisting on me giving her more of my writing. I slowly trickled more pieces to her before she accumulated enough to give to her friend, Jackson Ferrera.

Opal began coming over to our house. If Alex was out late, we'd have dinner together. We drink together most Friday nights. We smoked a joint together once and she laughed so much she peed herself.

Opal and Alex had an interesting relationship. Opal paid compliments to his appearance like she did with everyone but it never verged on sexual or romantic. She was an observer like all of us, but she didn't write about it.

She'd also mock him as most girls do together behind their boyfriend's back. All remaining affectionate and loving. The kind of way I talked about Stacey. She was my pestering little sister who was also my youthful partner-in-crime.

"I love your hair, hon!" She said once to Al after he returned home to us watching Glee on the couch.

"Oh." He patted down the sides of his hair as if he forgot it was on his head. "I guess."

He left the room and Opal turned to me and said, "That man can not take a compliment."

I laughed and shrugged. "I've tried my best. I think he thinks you're lying to him."

"Why?!" Opal's mouth lay agape. "I'm not a liar."

I stared at her speculatively. "Everyone's a liar."

"I'm not." She placed her hand on her chest, insisting to me, "My mom told me to never lie."

I don't know if Opal has ever lied, not expansively. Not even little white lies. If you asked her how her day was, she'd tell you honestly. Maybe she fibbed and told half-truths, but she'd never fake compliment you.

She was judgy. On the other side of her kindness was someone who would honestly tell you that you look ugly in that dress. Her job seemed like her destiny, paid to have an opinion because she wasn't designed for fake niceties. I appreciated and needed the quality. It was a confidence boost and a humbling force.

*

For my birthday, Alex took me to Big Sur. We flew up to San Jose and Alex drove us down to our lodge where I fell asleep and woke up 23.

In the early morning, we walked along Pfeiffer Beach where the water was too cold and dangerous to swim in and the wind blew so hard it blinded us. We abandoned the beach, had lunch, and walked Point Lobos, which felt like we'd walked into a dream. The water waved its blues and the wind waved through the trees just right to create the perfect breeze.

"You know," I said, "this is the first trip we've ever been on. Just you and me."

Alex bowed his head and said, "Suppose that's my fault. At least we've done Wicklow."

"I know, but it doesn't really count. We probably wouldn't have gone if we weren't in Dublin." We both walked with our hands in our pockets and it was easy to think of all those talks we'd had before with our hands stuffed into our jeans pockets.

Alex smiled, his eyes covered with sunglasses, and his hair framing his face. "I'm making up for it now. Best I can." He placed one of his hands on the small of my back; a reassuring touch. Alex often felt insufficient and I wasn't the best at combating that doubt. I know he's carried guilt for self-claimed selfishness. If we were both older I wouldn't have tolerated this in the manner I did at that age. I never cared that he wanted things because he wanted me to be a part of them. However, there was always a sense that Alex had to "make up" for what he had done. I don't know if that hurt me or pleased me.

When we finished the trail we had to go back to our lodge because Alex had slipped down a hill and cut a hole into his jeans. Believe me, very funny, I wish I had it to submit to Funniest Home Videos but alas...

Alex drove for the majority of the trip. I wasn't very good at driving in America. It confused my brain. I reached over, brushing a chunk of his hair behind his ear like he had done for me countless times. "You think you're going to keep it long?"

He shrugged. "I don't know. Do you think I should?"

"If you like it," I permitted.

He glanced over and gave me a look. "Does that mean you don't like it?"

I hummed. I had never really thought about it. "No. I like it," I decided. "It makes you look older. I think if you had the same cut as college you'd still look like you were 17."

"You don't think I've aged at all?"

"It's hard to tell. I've never been away long enough to notice a difference. What about me? Do I look older?" I batted my eyelashes.

He chuckled at my brazen show. "You look 23 to me."

*

I got a call from Jackson Ferrera a week after my birthday. I didn't know who he was and almost didn't answer the call when it rang at 10:30 AM, still in bed. Alex had left an hour or two earlier, kissing my forehead and unintentionally waking me up. We mumbled, "Bye, baby" to one another before he left and I drifted back to sleep.

I was in the shower when Alex returned home. It was somewhere around 5 PM and a Wednesday and I hadn't left the house once. I was in the middle of washing my hair when I heard the bathroom door open and my worries about this becoming a scene from Psycho dissipated when Alex said, "Hey, honey." Isn't it cute? We call each other honey now. It originated from Opal. We imitated her calling everyone "honey" with one another until we actually just ended up calling each other "honey" all the time.

"Hey," I called out over the shower. Alex discarded his clothes and joined me in the shower. We had started doing that more often too. We didn't often have sex in the shower either. I mean, it did happen, but we decided to shower together more in a chaste quality. Alex has the ability to wash your hair in the same way it feels at a salon. It's complete bliss. "How was your day?"

He was my little dog with his long hair getting wet in the shower and sticking to his face. He let the water run over it completely before pushing it back and out of his face. "Good. Fine," he answered. "I feel like I've been hunched over all day." He pecked my lips, a domestic greeting.

I reached down for my conditioner and told him, "I'll rub your back before bed." We might as well be the old married couple with aching backs and a stay-at-home woman willing to soothe them. I don't like to view us as old-fashioned. We were unconventional. British desert Californians, who were a musician and a pretend writer.

Alex took the bottle out of my hand, taking the conditioner into his hands, acting his role of hair masseuse. "You're my savior. I'd have a humpback if it weren't for you."

I shrugged as I turned for him to rub the product in my hair. "I like taking care of you. Shall I have dinner on the table too?"

He scoffed, "God, no. I'd be dead of food poisoning if you did that."

I laughed because I wasn't offended by not having any cooking skills. Alex understood that and has never forced a change on that. "You can't blame me. My parents don't know how to cook either."

"Your parents don't know how to do a lot of things you can do. Excuses, excuses." He clicked his tongue and I giggled as he squeezed one of my butt cheeks. "What did you get up to while I was gone?"

I sighed, turning back around to face him, a big smile plastered on my face. "Okay, well, don't freak out because I don't know anything yet."

Alex immediately grabbed my hands, nearing a panic. "What?"

I pushed his hands down. "Calm down," I instructed. "It's not that big of a deal." He relaxed and awaited an answer. "So, I got this call from someone Opal knows. A guy named Jackson Ferrera—"

"Oh, god, Janie, you're leaving me, aren't you?" Alex joked, turning his head away in dramatics, pushing me away, unable to bear the sight of me. "I always knew it."

I slapped his arms away. "Will you shut up? Listen." He looked at me normally and nodded his head. "Opal gave him some of my writing and he's this literary agent and he wants to talk about maybe him representing me—"

I was interrupted by Alex's excitement. "Are you serious? Like a book or something?"

I was reluctant to say anything, not wanting to get his hopes up, my hopes up like speaking it aloud would cancel out any possibilities. "I don't know yet. I haven't even met the guy yet."

"But you're going to?" Alex clutched my waist, his grip filled with giddiness.

I nodded, trying to fight this big smile. "This Friday at noon. And I don't know what it would be yet. He could just recommend me for some stupid literary agent job."

Alex quickly shook his head. "No way, Janie. You're going to make a book."

"I'm not going to make a book," I insisted.

But he fought back, confident as always, "You're going to make a book."

"Don't jinx anything. He might just help me submit some of my pieces to some higher-up magazines. Who knows, by the end of the year, I could be in the New Yorker?"

He scoffed, "You're better than the New Yorker. They'll be begging for your work."

I bumped into him. "Don't say that. I'd love to write for the New Yorker. I'd be happy writing for Playboy at this point."

Alex wiggled his eyebrows. "They do have some really good articles."

I pinched his side and told him to shut it. He wrapped me up in a hug and a dramatic rain—well, shower—kiss. Everything felt like it was landing in place and California did really seem to be a place where dreams came true and all that nonsense that I'll make fun of for the rest of this book but for this one moment, I'll believe to be true. Then, Alex got shampoo in his eye.

"Ow! Fuck, fuck, fuck." He clutched his left eye and doubled over. The water and shampoo suds still pouring down his face.

I grabbed his shoulder and asked if he was okay. He insisted on being fine but his hand remained on his eye and he grinded his teeth down before I managed to pull him out of the shower without tripping.

I sat him on the toilet seat, dripping wet, and shampoo still a mess in his hair. "Let me see," I said, drying his face off.

He waved me off. "No, no, I'm fine." His hand remained on his eye with a refusal to remove it.

"Al," I said and tugged at his wrist. He dropped his hand and slowly opened his eye, bloodshot and pink. "Oh, Jesus."

"What? Did it fall out?" He joked.

I snorted a laugh and began searching for eye drops. "It's dried up, that's all."

Then came the struggle of actually getting the eye drops into Alex's eye because he refused to keep his eye open. He kept muttering, "Ow, ow, ow" as each eye drop flooded his eyeball.

Later that night, after I fell asleep in front of American Idol, Alex must have moved me to our bedroom or I slept-walked there. Alex said I did that a few times. When I woke, the red digital clock on my bedside read 2:32 AM. I dug my face into the pillow, pissed I had woken up in the middle of the night. I turned my head and came to the realization Alex was missing if he was ever in bed, to begin with.

I padded across our cold wooden floors barefoot in the dark before I saw the back patio light on and the faint shadow of Alex. I stepped one foot out and saw him, notebook in lap, cigarette in hand, gazing out onto the dark backyard, deep in thought.

"You shouldn't be smoking with your eye," I said hoarsely.

His head tilted back to look at me and he had a soft smirk on his face. "I'll live. Just needed something to relax."

"Take an edible then."

He vibrated off laughter and tapped the ash off his cigarette. "I'll find a different excuse."

I kept one foot outside and one inside, asking, "Do you want some company?"

He shook his head, insisting, "No, no. You sleep."

I was hesitant to move. "You sure?"

Alex nodded. "Yeah, yeah. Just finishing up some writing. I'll be in soon."

"Okay."

I returned to bed and fell asleep before Alex came back but when I woke up in the late morning he was asleep beside me. I wondered what Alex wrote. The beginning verses to "Stuck on the Puzzle" or if he never picked up his pen to begin with? Maybe I read too much into it but Alex never had qualms about me keeping him company while he wrote and our late-night smokes were ritualistic at that point. I believed he thought about something else. Me. Something too personal to share.

With both of us, those secrets that we kept from one another were exclusively worries. I can't help but think Alex knew what was eventually to come from my contact with Jackson. I can't help but think he worried. He always worried, suffering in silence. I screamed about everything and he sat with it, let it stir and brew for days, months, years. It was a habit of our 20s. But Alex always seemed to know, a habitual psychic and I was the palm in his hand.

*

It didn't end up being a book, not at first, but we did a trial period in which I submitted to Jackson who began shopping my pieces around to publishers. I was terrified and didn't tell anyone other than Alex and Opal for fear it would fall through and fail. Jackson felt confident and I supposed that helped, although I couldn't comprehend a world where I wrote a book, even though, for years, I had already written books in my notebook.

I tried not to think about it much. We were coming up on Alex going back on tour again and the question of whether to stay in LA rose, which was really just whether I would. I didn't like the thought of being in LA without Alex. I found the city rather unappealing but I didn't know where I'd return to. London was an option but I don't know how at home I would've felt there. It's cheesy to say Alex is my home because he's a person and I found that statement to be rather exaggerated. In those days, I just felt more comfortable wherever he was, maybe because I was so aimless myself, but I knew that I finally found a direction to go in.

One of my pieces did end up in The Village Voice. Alex paid to have a print copy sent, and he framed it. It embarrassed me so much that I stuffed it into drawers when we had guests over.

One night, we went to a party on some random Monday and sat on the uncomfortable fancy chairs, drinking cocktails. Alex had an Old Fashioned, I had a Cosmopolitan. It was an affair with some elegance, though I can't remember what it was actually for. We both vowed not to get drunk because we couldn't be hungover on a Tuesday.

I had my hand on Alex's knee and he had his arm around the back of my chair. I think the dinner they served was chicken but I don't remember. It wasn't very good either way.

"Do you think I should get my Master's?" I asked Alex.

He sipped his drink with his left hand and lightly tapped my shoulder with his right. "Why would you do that?"

I shrugged and picked up my Cosmo, trying to be Carrie Bradshaw in hopes it would get me a job as luxurious as hers. Or maybe just the clothes and the apartment. "Something to do. I like the idea of going to school here."

Alex's brows furrowed as he looked over at me. "But you hated school."

"That's not true."

He chuckled. "J, you complained about it all the time."

Maybe I did. I don't remember. It's like when people have babies and they forget how hard labour was so their bodies trick them into having more kids. "I liked the structure of it. Plus, a Master's would allow a more flexible schedule and you'll be away on tour soon so it'd be something to do."

Alex shook his head. "I don't think you'd like it."

I frowned. "Maybe I would."

"I mean..." Alex searched for what to say. "I just think you're getting somewhere with your writing and you're running away from it."

I rested my head on my hand. "Maybe."

Alex reached out and pushed my hair out of my face. "Whatever you do you'll be great at. Just do what you love, okay?"

His smirk put me on edge and I raised my eyebrow. "What? Like you?"

"Huh?" His face looked puzzled, worried that he had offended me somehow.

"I love you so you want me to do you?"

He threw his head back in laughter. "Get your mind out of the gutter, Janie."

*

The whole Master's idea felt foolish. So, I decided to do it, except it was March and way past the time for applications. In the meantime, I tried to figure out what I would do while Alex was away. I felt I should have wanted to leave Los Angeles after all my bitching and moaning, but something drew me to stay. There was a new friend in Opal but I didn't have any job prospects through her or Jackson. Freelance could fit but I didn't want it to fit. The idea of me writing a book burrowed more inwardly to my mind as Jackson stopped mentioning book deals and directed me more toward staff writing jobs to get my name out there.

But I felt that LA had wrapped its warmth around me and suffocated me long enough to want to stay. I liked America and I liked the city, but I also had a visa to worry about. I was over on a tourist Visa and since all work I had done was freelance, I was paid as if I was located in England still. I could fly back and stay for another 180 days or I could get a work visa, which meant getting a job.

That's when Condé Nast appeared. Jackson had unofficially become my unpaid job seeker, doing it solely for me as a favour. I suspected he felt bad for not achieving a book deal and decided to help me out. The Condé Nast position was for a product writer and reviewer. The issue was I had no history with a full-time writing job, but either Jackson had connections or they felt pity for me, too, so I got the job.

So, it wasn't LA, it would be New York.

Alex loved the idea and boasted about it to everyone, kissing my cheek after each statement, and squeezing me to his side. As for New York, he simply said, "It's your turn."

He would be away on tour anyway, so it didn't matter much other than that he would crash at whatever housing I picked in New York. We flew to New York in June. I had never been to New York in the summer. I had never been with Alex in New York.

Usually on our excursions, I dragged Alex around the town and up the hills. In New York, Alex dragged me to the Strand, Chelsea Hotel, the Mudd Club, the Transit Museum, and, most importantly, the turtle pond in Central Park.

Beside the box turtles and red-eared sliders, Alex and I rested against a rock as they padded their way shoreside. He wore a baby blue shirt and picked at his jeans, his mannerisms the same as when I spotted him across the room. "Do you remember when you used to have writing on your jeans?"

He looked up at me, smiling, pushing his hair behind his ears, pounds of fluff. "Yeah."

"What was written on them?" Those blurs of red markings and my wish to know those depths of his soul as if what he was really thinking was written on the knees of his jeans.

He shrugged and almost shamefully said, "Just song lyrics. Strokes and stuff."

"You wrote on them?"

"Yeah."

"I always figured that your mates had written on them. My Converses used to be covered in Joanie's handwriting and hearts." I hadn't thought of her for a long time. Nothing in America reminded me of Wakefield and so Joanie never came to mind.

Alex broke me out of my thoughts, asking, "Can I write on your trainers?"

I raised my eyebrows. "On my new shoes? Can I write on your jeans?"

"Sure." He pulled a pen from his pocket and handed it to me. His quickness made me hesitate but I pulled the pen from his fingers and thought of what to write. I could've drawn a penis but I wasn't that cruel. The black pen was faint against the dark blue denim but I repeated my sketching until the letter was clear enough. I wrote my name because I couldn't think of anything else. What's more beautiful than a person's name? Gross.

Alex seemed to like it, a grin upturning on his face, and an eyebrow raised against me. "Why don't you draw a heart around it?"

I rolled my eyes. "Do you want me to put an arrow through it too?"

He laughed but said, "Sure." I didn't add the heart or arrow. It would be too cheesy and ruin my beautiful cursive name. I returned the pen to him and he tapped his hand over the writing. "With me every step of the way."

I giggled, both embarrassed and charmed. "You gonna get it tattooed?"

I joked but he took it shockingly seriously. "Do you want me to?"

I bolded my eyes and tilted my head. "Stop," I chastised him. "I'm not trying to brand you. I won't even let you write on my shoes and you're willing to get me permanently on your body?"

"Those are nice shoes," he countered.

"You've got a nice body," I argued.

"It'll add to it."

Whether it was sweetness or idiocy, it did feel like love. I raised my legs and plopped my feet in his lap. "Alright. Write away on them then." They were just trainers anyway and his name in a heart with an arrow through it was worth much more.

Afterwards, we toured an apartment. Previous apartments we had toured had been far above my expected salary. Alex had this need to contribute to the apartment's rent despite not getting a break from touring until late October. I had a need to pay rent for myself. I never lived on my own and I felt this apartment should be my apartment, even though Alex's stuff would be there. 

Alex understood all of this, although still pushed to contribute some to the rent and, well, I'm never one to deny financial assistance so we made a deal that he would pay me for storing his stuff while he was gone and I would pay for the rest. This all meant those apartments next to Central Park were out of the question. So, we headed downtown, Petula Clark style. 

"You know, this area is called SoHo too?" I asked him as we walked down Thompson Street. He shook his head and I explained, "It's because it's south of Houston Street. So. Ho."

He chuckled and nodded. "It'll be like a little piece of home with you."

It turned out to be. I found a place on Prince Street for a reasonable amount. 1 bed. 1 bath. Windows that drenched the floors in sunlight, a big closet, and—the thing I was most excited for—a bathtub.

On our first night there, Alex and I attempted to do the romantic having-a-bath-together thing. I purchased a bubble bath solution from Target and Alex got a bottle of wine from Wine and Spirits. We felt very American in both stores. 

"I can't remember the last time I took a bath," Alex said as he sank into the warm oasis.

"They used to just spray you down with a hose, right?" I joked as I sipped on my wine.

Alex cupped his hand in the water and sent a splash my way. "Hey! You got water on the floor. And in my wine." I frowned at the bubbles resting on the surface of the wine.

"I'll get you another glass," he said as he stood.

I reached out and grabbed his leg. "Don't leave."

At my request, he sank back into the water. "Here. You can have mine." He stuck out his half-full glass. I leaned forward and kissed the back of the hand that was holding it. My version of thank you as I took the glass from his hand. 

He stretched his legs out and we kept poking each other until I took Alex's feet into my lap. I lightly rubbed on the left one, his big toe sticking out above the water. I felt sinking in myself and refused to look at him. I was becoming too soft. "I'm gonna miss you."

Alex sighed. I knew he hurt more than me. I missed him and we loved each other the same but I knew he had to deal with two kinds of pain. His and mine. We had to deal with missing each other and he had to deal with the guilt. I always told him it was ridiculous to feel guilty because I never held any resentment toward him for going away. But I guess we never properly addressed all that ugly stuff from the past, only in fights, and we never concluded properly, just in exhaustion.

But I think we both knew that communication would be the difference this time. The band was more established. I was more established. I think I would have hated being alone in our LA house without Alex but something about New York, feeling it was mine, made me feel a little freer.

"I'm sorry," he said.

I shook my head. "Don't apologize. I'm proud of you."

"Proud of you too." I looked up to see the big smile on his face. You know, it heals anything.

I slide deeper into the tub, the water covering my neck. I was bare-skinned and my insides were beginning to feel the same. "I'm nervous."

"We'll be fine," he assured.

I shook my head. "I know. I'm nervous for me. Being alone and the new job."

His hand found my leg in the water, stroking it. "You'll make friends in no time and you're a whiz."

"But what if I hate it?" I sounded wobbly like I was about to tip off the edge.

Alex, the calm force dragging me through life, said, "Then, on to the next thing."

I held a smile to him. One he returned. "My mother would say I'm being picky."

"Your mother who drinks for a living?"

I held offence when Alex spoke of my mother. The things he said were true but my whole life I’ll feel the need to protect her. At that age, I still felt destined to unknowingly become her. In that way, Alex was insulting future me. "Hey! She does other things. Probably."

Alex laughed and pulled his feet from me, curling his legs. "Alright. I'm cramping here." He rose from the tub, swishing the water around, peeking at the edges.

I gasped. "Even if the foot rub I gave you?"

We moved out of LA pretty quickly but yet again transporting all your belongings from one side of the country to another was a pain. We enlisted the help of friends but in New York, we were on our own for the most part, other than some hired movers. We weren't getting that couch up the stairs.

The band did a few festivals in Europe in July before returning for a New York show at the beginning of August. I was only a few weeks into my job and it was the fulfillment and structure I needed, although I wasn't doing much writing. I was fine with working my way up, setting an achievement, and moving forward. It was a mostly new idea for me.

After their concert, we did the ritual of bar hopping. I invited my new friend, Tasha, and her boyfriend to join us, however, her boyfriend ditched her after the show, which led her to get very drunk and weepy and therefore pulled me away from any time of catching up with the group. Although, they seemed very consumed by the drama.

"I don't mean to put this all on you," she cried to me. "But he said he was gonna buy me a drink tonight and I—" she was taking away into sobs.

"I'll buy you a drink," Matt offered.

"Really?" It was in fact her fifth drink. She had quickly consumed the first 2 from the rounds and pulled the other 2 from me. "I really liked him, you know. I love him, I think."

"We know, sweetie." I felt bad for her but all the crying was becoming quite tiresome, especially with a girl you had only known 2 weeks in the setting of an office space.

She sat up straight, wiping away that wetness on her face when Matt arrived back with a drink. For the time being, she calmed her waterworks with a gulp of liquor. "You wouldn't do this to Jane, would you Alex? Why can't I find a guy like that?"

I chuckled, "Alex ditches me all the time."

To the side of me, Alex's head snapped to me. "What?" His face was etched with a furrowed brow and a frown.

I turned to him wide-eyed and confused. "What?"

"I don't ditch you."

My mouth created a slight opening in bafflement. "Yeah, you do. Or did." I turned back to Tasha. "Either way, they're all assholes, you just have to find the asshole that fights you."

"Ha. Asshole." Jamie laughed.

While Jamie found humour in the situation and Tasha found slight comfort, Alex found offense. "You think I'm an asshole?"

I turned back to him. "Yeah. Don't you think I'm a bitch?"

His eyes were wide at the word like we were kids taught to put coins in the swear job. His response was quick. "No."

I tried my best to give it to him in an explanation that would placate him. "Okay. Well, I get on your nerves or whatever. Either way, you just have to find the guy that fits you. Now, I think we should get you a cab." Tasha nodded with a sniffle. 

After I stuck Tasha in a cab, I stayed outside to have a cigarette. I had a weird feeling in my stomach that I wasn't sure if it was from the alcohol or something emotional. I had a rash on my left leg that I labelled as being from stress but I wasn't sure what it was stress from. I felt a pressure on my chest and the perfect solution was a cigarette.

It wasn't a smoke signal for Alex to join me although I should have thought that considering our history and the perfect view from our table out the window to the street. He came out halfway through the ash and walked with hair in his face and hands in his pockets.

When he stepped in front of me, I reached out and brushed his hair out of his face and wondered if he felt this way—this feeling of caring, uncovering someone for your gaze—every time he did it for me. I tucked it behind his ear and peeked the small smile underneath that shaggy head. It tickled me, exposing a silent laugh from my lips. 

"You really think I'm an asshole?" He asked. His tone was playful but I knew he was worried I considered him to be one of them. That breed of man who brushed women off after they got their goods as if he hadn't loved and cared for me since the moment we met.

I held my palm over his cheek, holding my hand over his fire, rubbing the lobe of his ear. I just wanted to hold him forever and I felt like crying at the thought I couldn't. I don't know where the sudden emotion came from but I suppose by this point it isn't shocking to find myself crying, especially after 3 drinks outside a bar. I couldn't speak so I shook my head and kept the overwhelming pathos at bay by the rhythmic stroking of his ear. 

"I missed you," he said.

I cut any further words he had off with a shake of my head, a dismissiveness I needed. "I don't want to talk about missing each other anymore." The gates fell and I dropped my arm away from his shoulder, picking at my nails as my voice quivered. "All I talk about is missing you."

"Jane."

Exasperated with myself, I shook my head and looked away not to cry. "I just want to enjoy the night." I looked at him, listening attentively, eyes trained on me. "I don't want to think about you leaving tomorrow night and I'm fine, trust me, but I feel this ache all the time and I don't want to feel this ache while you're here and I don't want to talk about this ache because I know it's mutual so let's stop talking about it and pretend that this is just any other night in our lives and we're in Sheffield, grabbing a pint with our mates or something." 

I laughed wetly. He reached out to me and brushed my hair behind my ear and it made everything feel alright. "This feels pretty Sheffield, doesn't it?"

"What?"

He shrugged and took out his pack of cigarettes, plucking one, and placing it in between his lips. "Light me up, Janie, would ya?"

A smile tugged my lips and I dug into my purse one-handed for my lighter. He leaned forward, the end of it so close to me I could take a bite of it. I lit the flame between us and then to his cigarette. He took a puff before stepping back to exhale, his eyes stuck with mine. 

"I love you. I feel like we don't say that enough," I told him. He stood away from me but I felt so close to him like we had wrapped ourselves up in a fort of blankets, not standing in the humid August streets. 

"You don't have to say it for me to know it. Hasn't that always been our MO?" In wordless whispers and those longing stares, we had always spoken with some underlying language that didn't even make perfect sense to us, it was just there. 

"Yeah. Still, I want to remind you."

He chuckled and stepped closer, hooking his arm around my neck, and pulled me beneath his chin with a long gaze down at me. "I love you too, Janie. And all the rest."

"The rest?" I questioned.

His Adam's apple bopped and he looked up at the sky for a moment as if God was giving him the all-clear. His eyes reintroduced themselves to me. "There's this weight of love inside me that I'll never be able to express to you. It's just there, a consuming being that flares up whenever you're near me or I think about you. It's this constant. I've had it since I thought your name was Jeanie and I still don't know how to talk about it or what to call it—all this unexpressed love."

"It seems like you did." I tried not to sob. I thought of Tasha, likely crying in a cab, and I know I've always been a fortunate girl and I've been called lucky since birth, but I never felt like I truly won anything other than meaningless games until I was brought to Alex. I thought of all those missteps I could have taken to have never met Alex about how many things had to go a certain way for me to be at that first gig. How—I guess—I have to thank Matt, although that part is reluctant for me to say (a fear it will go to his head). But I kept it all inside and didn't tell Alex this because I think this is part of that weight of love I still can't fully express. "Are you sure it's not a tumor?"

He laughed at me and kissed the top of my head. My cigarette had been scuffed out against his jeans so we shared the rest of his before Alex suggested, "I think we should head home." I had never confessed how romantic I thought the idea of going home with Alex was to me but I have a feeling he just knew because he always just knows.

He took me by the hand and took me back inside the bar where we said goodbye to our party of people and I smacked a kiss on the cheek to each of them. They've always felt like brothers-in-law to me but I found as we grew older and closer, they were my friends too.

We headed back to our apartment, taking the A train. Alex held my purse for me and we sat in a sweaty, non-air-conditioned subway car, and it felt as though we were in London on the tube, praying for a gust of wind to come in through the little window and provide momentary relief. 

It was too hot to touch each other's skin so we held a small space between us and knocked knees with one another. Alex sat hunched over, his hands sitting on the top knee of his crossed legs. I leaned back against the plastic orange chair. The train was mostly empty but we filled its quietness with laughter. Halfway through the ride, that sentimental fuzzy part of me took a picture of him. I still owned a flip phone for the sole purpose of having a slideout keyboard, not known for having a good camera, and the photo was mostly unrecognizable to anybody but me, which might be why I liked it so much. 

I’d take these photos often and flip through them occasionally when I was waiting for the subway. I printed some out and pinned them on the walls because I didn’t want to buy picture frames. I folded one up and put it in my wallet because I always loved that Alex had a photo of me in his wallet—a tiny crushed-up photo of my graduation portrait, ugly, but he had pride for it and me).

Without Alex, the apartment had succumbed to my mess. There were clothes tossed in the corner of the bedroom, the desk was covered in papers, books, and more clothes, and the kitchen was dealing with a major dishes problem.

The hour was late but we were both determined to soak up as much time with one another as possible. We undressed from the day and dressed for bed, but sat on the edge of our bed over the covers, talking, talking, talking. Two frogs croaking at one another from across the pond. All we needed was Charlton Brook and we'd be our old selves again. 

"I never thought I'd like work. I'm not in love with this job but I come home and my feet ache and I love it. I like feeling I worked for something," I told him. "I think I need firm direction in my life otherwise I turn into a mess."

Alex looked pleased but all-knowing. He knew all these parts of me before I did. "You were raised without it so you crave it in other aspects." He leaned back on the bed, putting his arms behind his head, so casual in every sense of the word.

"Who needs a therapist when I have you?" I asked. He laughed but I was serious (both good and bad). He's an observer, he just knows these things from one look at you. He reads you completely and then acts like it's nothing. I feel I know Alex well, better than anyone, but not like he knows me. I've always felt there was a piece of Alex that was off-limits to everyone, even himself sometimes. There's a corner of him I will never reach. For him, my thoughts have always been a nude model on full stark display.

Alex turned onto his side and reached a hand over to me, clasping it with a tight squeeze. "You happy?" It was a quick check-in, the reassurance he needed that he wouldn't leave me totally screwed up and alone. Alex often had the feeling of needing to "rescue me," which was partially true but he took too much on sometimes, bearing the weight of both our emotional states, an overwhelming thing that put so much consequence on the question he asked like I wasn't just answering for me, I was also answering for him.

I squeezed back to ease his anxieties. "Yeah. You?" He stayed silent and looked around the room once, startling my heart. He tugged on my arm once as a smirk spread on his face. "What?" 

He tugged again, this time harder. I stared at him quizzically until he pulled once again, yanking me down to lay on top of him. He communicated with his lips, both silent minus gasps. He turned us, hovering over me, flat on my back. We got under the covers.

*

The following night we stayed in and ordered a pizza before having sex on the couch. After, I laid on Alex's chest, our nude bodies up against each other and I do apologize to anybody who sat on the couch after, I swear it wasn't that dirty. His hands were solid on my back, studying the lower curve of my spine, hitting a spot that made me stretch like a cat after a nap.

I sighed as the tension released from my back and laid back down on his sternum. "We're awfully vanilla," I said.

Alex snorted this big ugly snort of laughter that I find so cute like a baby learning how to breathe. "What, like chains and whips?"

I laughed and raised my head up, my chin pressed on his skin, staring up at his tucked head, awkwardly propped up on the armrest. "No. Georgia just told me this story about doing it on the roof of her building."

An amused Alex asked, "You want to head up on our roof now?"

He motioned sitting up but I pushed him back down. "We have an exposed roof. I'm not getting the cops called on us."

"Where's the fun in that if there isn't a little risk of indecent exposure?" He joked.

I giggled and thought of making a joke about getting visas revoked for public nudity, instead, I told him, "We're hiding tonight. Besides, I don't need all that for sex to be fun with you."

He bucked his hips up against mine. "'Cause I'm so good in bed?" He raised an eyebrow and wore a taunting smirk that made me want to slap and kiss him. How infuriating to be so intoxicated by him.

"'Cause you love me," I teased, tapping his nose. I slobbered a kiss on his cheek, which made him groan in disgust like it was his mother doing it in front of all his friends. "And you're going to take me to get ice cream because I'm thinking about vanilla ice cream now."

"From Morgenstern's?" He asked me, even though he knew the answer.

I sat up from him, noting his eyes on my exposed breasts (sometimes, it's nice to know a man is still a boy), and hummed, "Yes, sir." Morgenstern's sat two blocks up on Houston and in the past few months, I had developed an addiction to their bourbon vanilla ice cream and considered it my special treat after a day of work. Alex was partial to salted chocolate, which I always thought was a good balance with mine, especially since he'd let me steal scoops off his cone and mix it with my cup of ice cream.

Alex went out in jeans, a T-shirt, and his Doctor Martens. I went out in sweatpants, a camisole, and my flip-flops. It was 11:40 and only 2 blocks away! 

I was charged up and kissed him behind his ear as he paid for the ice cream. We must have been foul to look at with our hair unbrushed and a careless woman hanging off her good-looking man. I often had little care about how I looked at night in New York. Everyone in New York, one way or another, was loathsome to watch at night so I had no problem with the idea the cashier might have hated us for coming in right before closing, dangling around as we waited. Besides, Alex left a tip.

My hands clawed around Alex's shoulders and I bounced on the balls of my feet as they scooped our ice cream. We ate our ice cream on the small bench they had outside the parlour. Alex ended up with smears of chocolate on the corners of his lips. It was pleasurable to see him so untidy, it would make you laugh and kiss his lips, transferring some of the residue onto you like lipstick.

Alex chased me up the stairs of our apartment building with the menace of pinching my ass to coerce squeals out of me. We caused a ruckus, loud off of our sugar high, but, at the very least, not stumbling drunk up the stairs like some of my other neighbors. Alex caught me at the apartment door. I had no escape, he had the keys. He cornered me and gave a hard pinch working his way up from my butt to my stomach where I was ticklish.

"Mercy! Mercy!" I surrendered. He called off his attack, ready to head inside for some explicitness. 

He put the key in, turned it, and then it snapped. He held the bow, the shaft lodged in the lock. "Fuck," he cursed.

Panic set in as Alex fiddled with the doorknob with no luck. "Fuck. Are we locked out?" I asked.

He picked at the lock, muttering, "Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck..." 

It soon became clear that we were stuck. It was nearing 1 AM, I desperately had to pee, and Alex had to leave in 6 hours. "Can we kick the door in?"

"Are you suggesting either of us is strong enough to break the deadbolt?" Alex stood up straight, tossing his head back in exhaustion.

I shrugged. "I don't know. You're pretty fit." He was proper chuffed by this, a slight puff in his chest. "I could try."

"With your flip-flops?" They were the cheap kind. I bought them at 5 Below. "If we break the door the whole building can walk in."

Not knowing the number of any emergency locksmiths, I called 911 and waited at the bottom two steps of the staircase facing the front door. "I guess this is what I get for eating too much ice cream," I quipped.

"No such thing," Alex excused. 

Shrouded in quietness and a reputation of lacking patience, I laid my head on Alex's shoulder and would have fallen asleep if my bladder wasn't prepared to burst. Alex tapped a beat on the denim-covered knee and we didn't talk, just stayed close, two beings huddled together for survival and companionship.

Firefighters came and had no luck removing the broken key so they busted into the apartment. We couldn't lock it but we could at least close it. I rushed in for the bathroom. I laid down on our bed and waited for Alex while he used the bathroom. I fell asleep before he returned.

In the morning, Alex nudged me awake. He was fully dressed and by the light stumbling in through the window, I knew what it meant. "I fell asleep. Why'd you let me?"

"Figured if you fell asleep while I was in the bathroom you were pretty tired." Over the covers, flip flops kicked off the edge of the bed, in the two minutes he was away.

"'Kay." I was still fiddling out of sleep when Alex tapped my arm, an insisting action to make me stay in bed. "Let me walk you out."

"No, stay in bed, it's fine." He kneeled beside the bed, forcing my hand.

"You sure?"

He nodded. "I'll see you in a little. Yeah?" He kept it short. It was the easier way.

I rubbed my eye, knowing I wouldn't be going back to sleep as much as Alex hoped I would. "Yeah. I'll try to get off sometime in September."

"Don't feel pressured. I'll see you in Philly, right?" That would be over a month away, 30th of September.

I nodded because it was easier than speaking. "Call me when you get to Boston."

He donned an assuring smile, leaned down, and kissed me. He left and I made myself a cup of coffee and drank it and sat with silence.

*

On a Wednesday, after a day of work, I took the train down to Philadelphia. I had never been before and part of me wanted to enjoy all the tourist things about it but I had limited time between 30th Street Station and heading to the Electric Factory. 

However, I made a pit stop along the way, getting off the subway, and meeting Alex at the Reading Terminal Market for a late lunch/early dinner. It wasn't the Art Museum or Independence Hall but it allowed a cultural indulgence of the city. 

Alex wore a jean jacket and didn't look like a man about to front a sold-out show. We bumped shoulders with passersby as we made our way through the narrow passageways. Alex got a cheesesteak, which I found disgusting. I ate a soft pretzel and assorted candy from a Pennsylvania Dutch candy shoppe.

We managed to find a table wedged between dad with his two kids and a group of high schoolers. Safe to say, we had trouble hearing each other over the chaos but we communicated through shared observations, reacting with a stare at one another as the father began to yell at his son or a laugh at the high schoolers mocking one of their teachers.

We hadn't really spoken until we left the building, stepping out into the beginnings of a crisp autumn evening. Alex bought me ice cream from Bassetts (as if I needed more sugar) and gave the change to a group of busking drummers by the door. 

I grabbed Alex's attention at a stoplight as I dragged out, "So..." 

He chuckled at my solicitation, dragging out his own, "So..."

The light turned green and we stayed in step with one another. I initiated the conversation but I had no follow-up for my So-ing. Sometimes, I just wanted to look at him but walking and staring is a difficult practice. "One of my pieces is going to be in this magazine n+1. Something I wrote back in LA, Jackson submitted forever ago."

"Is it going to be printed?" He asked.

"Yeah, but I think you can read it online."

Quickly, he shook his head. "I want the physical thing."

I laughed. "Always one for physical media, Al." It was clear with the record collection I was storing in a small New York apartment. You had transferred this habit onto me as I went out to purchase the New York Times from a street kiosk instead of reading it online.

"It'll be easier. I can read it on a plane, on the bus, on the toilet."

I hit his shoulder light-heartedly. "Alright, I'll get you the print."

*

At the end of October, Alex returned from Tokyo for a small tour break. We fell into a cycle similar to that of our London days. I went to work, Alex stayed home. We went out to dinner sometimes, and we occasionally went out for drinks with my work friends, but more often, we just stayed home. It was a cocoon and I think we both preferred to stay still with one another after distant months apart.

I drank coffee in bed one morning, a Saturday or Sunday with no rush for any obligations, fine with retiring to a day in our shoebox. We were both still in our pajamas. Alex sat on the edge of the bed, facing me, strumming his guitar. I was on my laptop, scrolling through someone's blog, but mostly watching him.

These unguarded moments with his head slumped over his guitar. His hair covered his face almost completely, only able to distinguish his nose from the rest of him. The ends of his hair held these perfect curls that I envied. He's been perceived to be a cool, uncaring person but I've found Alex, especially during these early years, held such a concern about coming off a certain way, whether considered cold or cool. A long-held hatred for unwanted watching, even from me.

His muscles had suspended into relaxation finally. I found he acquired this rest most often with a guitar. He held a light strum, sometimes humming along, sometimes writing a note in his little notebook.

I thought I was catching an unaware Alex working away, much like our first year of knowing each other. Then, he looked up and said, "If you're going to stare at me, you might as well help me." He tossed me his notebook with dashes and scratches that to the untrained eye looked like a chicken scratch of nothing.

I read it and this time I could feel him watching me. I poured over the words as he had done with his writing and when I finished I said, "I feel so inadequate next to you."

"Shut up," he insisted, both through his support of me and his own insecurity.

"It's a beautiful song." I handed the notebook back to him. "A very beautiful love song." I crossed my arms, smiling at him.

"Well, you know."

"Yeah." Because I always did. This loving, hideous, unspoken language of ours.

 "Good inspiration. You gave me the title." Alex took months of crafting before giving something exposure, like formulating a fine wine. 

"Well, you wrote the rest of it," I reasoned. "Is it for the new album?"

He shrugged and examined his own work. "I don't think so. Maybe just for you and me."

*

a/n: this is pretty much for goblinontour. the next parts will come much sooner, we're approaching the thick of it... oh, and if you see any mistakes, no you didn’t.

[samcampbellfans]

Sam Campbell Podcast Masterlist

Here's a masterlist of podcast episodes that feature Sam Campbell, in reverse chronological order. I tried to find all of the episodes that are available on the internet, do send me an ask if you find any that I did not include here!

Note: some of these links are Spotify links but usually podcast episodes are available anywhere you usually get a podcast i.e. Apple podcasts, Acast, etc.

September 2024

The Adam Buxton Podcast, Ep 226. Sam Campbell. Recorded 26th and 27th July 2024 at Latitude Festival.

July 2024

The Last Video Store. Hosted by Alexei Touliopoulos.

May 2024

Lucy and Sam's Perfect Brains, Ep 6, Ep 7, Ep 8, Ep 9. Hosted by Sam Campbell and Lucy Beaumont.

April 2024

Some Laugh Podcast - Episode 99. Taskmaster, Edinburgh Fringe & Secrets. Hosted by Marc Jennings, Stephen Buchanan and Stuart McPherson.

Tim Key's Poetry Programme. 3. Safari. On BBC Radio 4.

Lucy and Sam's Perfect Brains, Ep 2, Ep 3, Ep 4, Ep 5. Hosted by Sam Campbell and Lucy Beaumont.

March 2024

Lucy and Sam's Perfect Brains, Ep 1. Hosted by Sam Campbell and Lucy Beaumont.

Off Menu with James Acaster and Ed Gamble - Episode 229, Live with Sam Campbell in Nottingham Royal Concert Hall. Note: the episode was recorded on October 18, 2023 and released 2 March 2024.

January 2024

Drifting Off with Joe Pera Ep 12: Australia and its Greatest Horse ft. Cut Worms. Guests: Sam Campbell, Aaron Chen, Guy Montgomery and Yaraman Thorne aka Yaz.

November 2023

Ep110. SAM CAMPBELL / Plato, Purses & Palm Readings. Trusty Hogs podcast. Hosted by Catherine Bohart and Helen Bauer.

BONUS: Ep111. NATHAN FOAD/ Colleagues, Cucks & Cliff Richard. Trusty Hogs podcast - Sam pulls a prank on Nathan Foad at 22:38. Nathan Foad was in Bloods, the Sky TV sitcom that Sam was also in.

Taskmaster The Podcast. Ep 149. (S16 Ep.10.) Hosted by Ed Gamble.

Northern News. ‘A Spider’s Intern’. Hosted by Ian Smith and Amy Gledhill. Sam Campbell's guest appearance starts around the 21 minute mark.

September 2023

Taskmaster The Podcast. Ep 141. Sam Campbell - S16 Ep. 2. Hosted by Ed Gamble.

May 2023

WTF w/ Sam Campbell. Welcome to Meet You podcast. Hosted by Dart Sultan and Robbie Armfield.

April 2023

Mugg Off #173 Live Show Melbourne. Sam Campbell, Sam Taunton, Tim Hewitt, Laura Hughes.

November 2022

NTS - Hot Mess W/ Sam Campbell (hosted by Babak Ganjei).

October 2022

Dave’s Edinburgh Comedy Awards: The Podcast with Lara Ricote and Sam Campbell.

September 2022

Plot Twist podcast Kevin ‘KG’ Garry and Sam Campbell. Sky TV.

June 2022

Mugg Off #139 - Sam Campbell. Hosted by Cameron Duggan, Gerard McGowan, and Yaz.

May 2022

Backyard Stories - Episode Thirty Four - Sam Campbell

October 2021

Aunty Donna Podcast Ep 277 Nippers Feat. Sam Campbell and Eric Hutton. Hosted by Zach, Mark and Broden.

July 2021

The Phone Hacks Podcast 170. Sam Campbell - Hay Ladies. Hosted by Mike Goldstein and Nick Capper. (Thanks to Cambo Fans!)

June 2021

The Good Stuff - Episode 41 Feat. Sam Campbell. Hosted by Sam Taunton and Tom Cashman.

Australia Debates - ABC Comedy. Series 1 Episode 1 - Should Social Media Be Banned?

March 2021

Mugg Off #80 Tom Cashman and "Dingo Duggan" - Sam Campbell plays Dingo.

December 2020

Mugg Off #069 - Sam Campbell. Hosted by Cameron Duggan, Gerard McGowan and Yaz. Note: this episode was recorded in December 2020 but the video was uploaded June 2022.

August 2020

The Grub podcast, with Nikki Britton, Bjorn Stewart, Sam Campbell, Cameron James, and Danielle Walker. Hosts: Anne Edmonds, Greg Larsen and Ben Russell. NOTE: Sam is only in a few clips in this podcast, not in the whole thing.

July 2020

Circling the Drain - Ep1: Elouise Eftos, Sam Campbell. Hosted by Andrew Wolfe.

April 2020

The Good Stuff - Episode 3 Feat. Sam Campbell (An Expose on Women’s Bathrooms). Hosted by Sam Taunton and Tom Cashman.

January 2020

Mugg Off #20 - Sam Campbell. Hosted by Cameron Duggan, Gerard McGowan and Yaz.

The Grub - 2020 Call-in Special. With Melinda Buttle, Becky Lucas, Sam Campbell, Aaron Chen, Rodney Todd. Hosts: Anne Edmonds, Greg Larsen and Ben Russell. NOTE: Sam is only in a few clips in this podcast, not in the whole thing.

October 2019

The Worst Idea Of All Time - Friendzone Ninety. Hosted by Guy Montgomery and Tim Batt.

May 2019

Special Features with Cameron James and Alexei Toliopoulos - Ep 50. Pokémon: Detective Pikachu (2019) with Tom Walker and Sam Campbell.

May 2018

Aunty Donna Podcast Episode 97: LIVE FROM THE FACTORY THEATRE SYDNEY FEAT. SAM CAMPBELL

October 2017

The Dragon Friends. S3 Ep 18: THIS BOY FREZNO. The Dragon Friends is a DnD podcast and this episode was live. From the podcast description: "Also Sam Campbell wore a mask and an elephant trunk for all of the recording so if it helps, imagine that." Cambo knows nothing about DnD - he went on the podcast to prank his friend Michael Hing (allegedly). Sam plays the antagonist (an evil Michael Hing).

The Dragon Friends. S3 Ep.17. A Dog With Human Eyes with Carlo Ritchie

August 2017

Mike Check with Cameron James & Alexei Toliopoulos - Ep 45. The Gong Show S01E04 & S01E05 w/ Sam Campbell

January-February 2015

Sad Boys, episode 1-3 hosted by Sam Campbell, Eddie Sharp and Anith Mukherjee. Originally broadcast via FBi Radio.

November 2014

Mark Williamson Chat Show - Episode 110: Becky Lucas and Sam Campbell. With regulars Lester Diamond and Ryan ‘Special Comments’ Crawford.

June 2014

Truth Nest - Episode 1 Feat. Alexei Toliopoulos. Hosted by Sam Campbell and Craig Anderson.

Below are 'lost episodes' - I cannot find the audio anywhere, or the audio files are broken. Podcast descriptions say Sam was a guest. Please do message me if you manage to find the audio!

Special Features with Cameron James and Alexei Toliopoulos: 9. 2 Guns with Sam Campbell. July 2015.

Sydney Comedy Festival Podcast. April 2015.

The Loose Five with Marcel Blanch- de Wilt. Episode 107- Sam Campbell & Shubha. January 2015.

Versus on FBi Radio - Witches vs Calendars w/ Sam Campbell and Claudia O'Doherty. December 2014. This episode has unfortunately been scrubbed from Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts and FBi Radio website.

The Loose Five with Marcel Blanch- de Wilt. Episode 96- Sam Campbell and Gearard McGeown. September 2014.

A massive thank you to @vampire-lily / Lauren for contributing to this masterlist!!

[seren-dipitous-art]

Okay so I’m back with art, and since it’s not bats, it’s aerials, since that is my entire personality at the moment.

I saw Godz by headfirst acrobats on Saturday night and my bi little heart was SO fucking happy. If you wanted to see a show in the Melbourne fringe festival, THIS.

Obsessed with Cupid’s sheepish little face.

[tellthemeerkatsitsfine]

This show went up on YouTube last week; I just watched it, and thought it was very very good. It's Milo Edwards' 2022 Edinburgh show, and was interesting to watch now, because last year, I saw his 2023 Edinburgh show, when he streamed it from the Fringe. The theme of his 2023 show was built around responding to the reaction to his 2022 show, so I already knew some of the content that was coming, though if you don't and are interested in watching it, I recommend not looking up the spoiler.

This is the third Milo Edwards special I've seen - after Pindos from 2019 (which is on YouTube) and Sentimental from 2023, and it's my favourite of the three, though I liked the other two. Pindos I thought had a lot of good stuff, my least favourite thing about it being that he sometimes does what I think of as Daniel Sloss Syndrome (lots of other comedians do it too, but I have it named after Sloss in my head because he does it so often in ways that ruin otherwise really good material), where he'll tell an edgy joke that's funny in its own right, but then counterbalance that by annoyingly congratulating himself on being so edgy, and/or challenging the crowd on whether he's being too edgy for them. He did a lot less of that in Voicemail than in Pindos. Still a little bit of it, but less. That was nice.

I guess he did a lot of it in Sentimental, but it was more justified there as he was responding to people who've actually complained about what he's said, rather than just imagining a shocked reaction from his audience. Sentimental discussed critics who'd complained that he was too cavalier about the dark topics covered in Voicemail, so fair enough, I don't mind comedians responding if they actually did shock someone. It's just annoying when they say something and then immediately add "Wow, I guess you're all shocked by that." I mean, I haven't looked it up, so I guess maybe he was inventing the reaction. But he quoted specific reviews when he was talking about it, and I'm pretty sure you're not allowed to make up quotes from reviews. There's a whole promotional poster industry built around that rule.

Anyway, there was a little bit of Daniel Sloss Syndrome in Voicemail, but not as much, as that is my only complaint about an otherwise very very good show. Had political stuff, personal stuff, observations that I've not heard 100 times, a few observations that were in the ballpark of things I've heard 100 times in comedy but he managed to find some fresh takes, punchline heavy in all the right places, structure that sort of sneaks up on you as it doesn't seem all that tightly themed but it ends up tying together, and as discussed the following year, quite a bit of dark subject matter.

The other two shows I've see him do made me like Milo Edwards; this one brings him way up the ranks of my favourites. I had Milo Edwards on my long list of people to see in Edinburgh in 2024, but I ended up cutting him because there were too many other people I wanted to see. This latest release would have me rearranging stuff to try to see him after all, if NextUp hadn't just announced that they'll be streaming his show again so I'll be able to catch it anyway. I'm definitely looking forward to seeing what he has next.

He was in Footlights, so it's yet another Oxbridge comedian for me to be into. I try not to have them dominate my comedy taste, I really do. He has the decency to be self-deprecating about it.

The YouTube description said it was "Nominated for Best Show at the Leicester Comedy Festival 2023, as well as having critically-acclaimed runs at the Edinburgh Fringe and Melbourne International Comedy Festival". That surprised me, because this is exactly as good as the sort of show that gets nominated for the Best Show award in Edinburgh (the thing that isn't the Perrier and hasn't been for many years). I checked, and it was not nominated. I have seen three shows that were nominated for that award but did not win in 2022, and Voicemail is significantly better than all three of those. I can't say it's better than the winner, which was Sam Campbell's - I can't really say it's worse than that either, because they're such an incredibly different type of comedy, which is why awards like this for "comedy" in general are pointless, because different genres are so different that comparing them is apples to oranges, in addition to the quality within a genre being a matter of subjective opinion. Despite that, however, I can categorically say that Voicemail is better than the three shows I've seen that got nominated and didn't win.

Thinking about that made me realize I think that I’ve probably seen two of my favourite political stand-up hours ever in the last two weeks. Both shows from 2022, both just released on YouTube (Laura Davis and Milo Edwards). I’m not completely sure if this is true, recency bias will be at play, but I thought to find out, I’ll try making a list of my top ten favourite political comedy stand-up hours.

Of course I immediately had the issue that I’m bad at narrowing things down, so to help myself out, my usual list rules applies. Those rules being 1) no artist can appear on the list more than once, I pick their best show and then no more by that person, leaving room to get in more people, and 2) it’s going in alphabetical order, no other order, narrowing it down to ten is hard enough without also ranking them in order of quality. Oh and a special rule just for this list: no Americans. Just because it's such a different type of politics there so such different political comedy so they can have their own list but not encroach on this one.

Ahir Shah – Ends (2023)

Alice Fraser – Ethos (2019)

Andy Zaltzman – Year in Review (2019)

John Oliver – Terrifying Times (2008)

Josie Long – Re-Enchantment (2022)

Kiri Pritchard-McLean – Home Truths (2022)

Laura Davis – If This Is It (2022)

Milo Edwards – Voicemail (2022)

Nish Kumar – It’s in Your Nature to Destroy Yourselves (part 1-2016 and part 2-2019 – his shows from both those years were put into a double album by that name so I’d love to just submit the whole album as one entry, but if that’s a copout, which it is, then the 2019 one is better)

Tom Ballard – It Is I (2023)

Obviously I had a bit of difficulty with the official definition of political comedy here, as not all of those shows talk about politics constantly, but I think it's enough of an overriding theme to count. Daniel Kitson’s Something Other Than Everything would definitely knock something off that list if it were eligible, and it’s themed around a lot of political issues, but I can’t picture Daniel Kitson saying the name of a politician on stage, and therefore I’m ruling him not a political comedian and ineligible for this list. Although I'm not sure Alice Fraser mentions specific politicians in Ethos, so maybe that's inconsistent. In fact lots of shows on that list don't get all that specific about individual politicians. Okay, new justification for leaving Kitson out that's more internally consistent: I was following another rule that I have used in previous lists, which is that Daniel Kitson gets his own category that's separate from everyone else, because it's not fair for other comedians to compete against him.

How political does a show have to be to be called a political comedy show, though? A few of David O’Doherty’s shows have some great political material, but not enough for me to think of it as a political show overall. Same with Michael Legge. I think Nish Kumar’s 2022 show was better than his 2016 or 2019 ones, but it wasn’t as explicitly political as those. His 2024 show is more explicitly political, and I like it better than nearly any stand-up hour I’ve ever heard by anyone, but it’s still in a WIP stage so I probably can’t count it. Nick Helm's 2022 show wasn't political mostly, but it had some slam poetry about the Boris Johnson administration in the middle that was fucking amazing, and made me realize that while I might not have as much appreciation as I'd like for the theatre-y side of comedy, the most artsy thing I love in stand-up comedy is poetry. Do Hannah Gadsby's Nannette or Douglas count as political? They cover feminist issues, and feminist issues are political. But also, everything is political. Mental health's political, but if I get into that then that's most comedy shows from the last fifteen years. Physical health is political. Relationship dynamics are political. Everything.

Okay, so I'm not sure what counts and what doesn't, and comedy is too subjective for a list like this to mean anything, this was a bad idea. But even if you consider all those caveats, and that this is by no means definitive and I am so bad at nailing down opinions this way, I find it interesting how much of this list of my favourite political comedy shows comes from 2022 (all of them better than the nominated-but-not-winning shows I’ve seen from that year). It's interesting because I keep reading people saying there's no good political comedy anymore, as though Andy Zaltzman's just wasted his entire life. There’s lots of good recent political comedy. It's just not on TV because they cancelled all the programs that showcased it there (that reminds me that Frankie Boyle should probably be on that list somewhere, I straight-up forgot about him, also I've just remembered that Stewart Lee's Snowflake/Tornado counts as a political comedy show, there's too much to choose from, I hate trying to narrow things down, why did I freely decide to do this?).

Also, I realize it's a bit ridiculous to call that list my favourite stand-up specials ever, because that leaves out lots of really famous old school stuff. But to be honest, I haven't seen a lot of that. It seems silly to say every show on the above list is better than everything Mark Thomas has ever done, but actually, I do kind of think that, I don't like Mark Thomas' stuff that much. A lot of stuff that's older than that I've not seen at all. I know British sitcoms from the 70s and 80s and 90s somewhat well (sort of, I have some massive gaps in my knowledge there too), but hardly any stand-up from then. So, you know, I'm not saying this Milo Edwards show is better than Alexei Sayle's entire life's work. But I've not seen Alexei Sayle's life's work and this is a list of my favourites. I can think of other political comedy shows that I have seen and enjoyed, from the last 20 years, but did not enjoy as much as the ten shows I put on that list. That includes a bunch of stuff from earlier in the 21st Century, so the point of this post is that of the political comedy hours I've seen, most of the best ones have been from the last few years. And therefore, people are wrong when they say there's no good political comedy anymore. Though that list is pretty useless because Stewart Lee should definitely be it (though his best political stuff has been some of his most recent, so the point stands). But I don't want to knock anything off the list now that I've remembered him. I'm not good at making lists.

[starshipqstar]

Annie (Aurelia) & Lena (Mo): more about these funny geniuses

So after posting the fun outtakes from their 🌶️ scene yesterday, thought you all deserved to know more about these legends! Because we love them both so muuuuch!!!

We first met Lena Moon (Mo) when we all were studying screenwriting together (which is also where Lauren and I met!) - so it’s such a joy to work with her on this show. LOOK AT THESE BABIES!!!

Lena then introduced us to Annie Lumsden (Aurelia) when they started to perform together in a sketch comedy duo Annie and Lena! So we owe Lena a bunch for helping us find our Co-Captain!

Annie and Lena as a duo are so incredibly funny and have the best comedic chemistry (which I’m sure you can tell by listening). A few of their career highlights include their debut show together This Is Our Pilot being nominated for Best Comedy at the Melbourne Fringe Festival 2019, and their second show This Is Our Show sold out its Melbourne International Comedy Festival 2021 season, was nominated for a Green Room Award for Best Ensemble, and was turned into a Live Stream and On Demand comedy special titled This Is Our Show: The Livestream. (So yeah, they’re pretty damn good!)

They are also about to debut their FOURTH show together, and Lauren and I got to see a sneak peek the other night as they prep for their Adelaide Fringe Festival run! It’s called Annie and Lena Hunt for Ghosts and it is lots of spooooooky fun. 👻

Head to their website here: https://www.annieandlena.com to see more 💕

[myfavouritelunatic]

🌻 If you get this, answer with 3 random facts about yourself and send it to the last 7 blogs in your mentions, anonymous or not! Let's get to know the person behind the blog 🌻

Do three more, please 🙂

Happily! 😊

1. I played netball for 15 years.

2. I love to travel but I hate flying! Heights and me do not go well together 😬

3. I performed on stage in a comedy show at the Melbourne Fringe Festival last year, first time acting since I was 18, and it was the best! Hopefully we’ll be doing it again at some point!

[musicarenagh]

Enzymecomplex: Where Digital Art Meets Boundless Creativity Today, we’re diving into the innovative world of “Enzymecomplex,” a digital event organized by Melbourne-based collective Minorarc for the 2024 Melbourne Fringe Festival. Running from October 1st to 20th, Enzymecomplex brings together independent artists to showcase their work in a virtual space. The event features a diverse range of contributions, including videos, music recordings, writing, and artwork, with each artist having their own unique space in the online "complex." Minorarc has a long history of supporting independent music, having organized live performances since 2005. Now, they're taking a bold step into the digital world with Enzymecomplex, creating an immersive and boundary-free experience for both artists and audiences. With no restrictions on genre or theme, the event promises an unpredictable and exciting journey through a wide array of creative expressions. We’re thrilled to sit down with Minorarc to explore the inspiration behind this ambitious project, the techniques that brought it to life, and their vision for the future. Let’s delve into the creative process behind Enzymecomplex and discover how this unique digital event is pushing the boundaries of artistic collaboration. Follow Enzymecomplex on Facebook Bandcamp   Enzymecomplex Compilation by Various Could you share the inspiration behind "Enzymecomplex"? " Enzymecomplex is a digital event ( www.enzymecomple...ex.art ) for Australia's Melbourne Fringe Festival this year (1st - 20th October), where independent artists have contributed videos, music recordings, writing and artwork. Each of the presenters has a virtual space in the event's online "complex", where they have had free reign to stage whatever their hearts desired. The compilation album at Bandcamp to support the event, came about in much the same way. We purposely left out any boundaries regarding genre or theme, in the hope that each space in the complex would be a new and unpredictable experience. We've always operated like this since the first Enzyme live performance concerts in 2005, which carried on around Melbourne until 2015. The aim was always to showcase a really broad spectrum of musical styles that exist outside of the mainstream. It has always been about introducing the public to new things, and giving artists a platform without barriers. During conception, I had a vision to tie all the spaces together with an overarching written story (akin to a Choose Your Own Adventure), but in the end we popped this idea into the "maybe next year" basket. If we made the artist's presentations sequential, in order to follow a storyline, it felt unfair that some would be visible early on, whereas others would need to rely on guests making quite a way though the site before their work was seen. It was a complexity to the complex that just seemed to complex for a first try at something digital! Thus, the stories, emotions, and ideas are purely that of the many artists who shared their work with us. We are very thankful to them all for their support and faith in the project. What techniques did you incorporate into "Enzymecomplex" to make it a reality? For the compilation album, all that was needed was some gentle mastering on a few of the tracks. Other than that, we left the audio files just as the artists had supplied. Instead, our efforts went into working out the best sequence for the music. Dawn Industry and Darkstereo (our two independent music community sites) have released quite a number of compilations over the years, the first being in 2008. The early ones were CD media, distributed in the pre-streaming age, until around 2013 when we started distributing work digitally. I still miss those CD days! Working digitally is just a more streamlined process though, and it is preferable to ensure that the presentation of the artist's works match with how the public prefers to "consume". This same idea lead to the Enzymecomplex digital event.

A way to reach as many people as possible, taking into consideration the big shift in people's behaviour post-Covid. The aim was to make it easy to access, and able to be enjoyed by guests whenever they wished. The Enzymecomplex site is quite a simple one really. We went through a stage of research to find the best solution, and finding that nothing pre-existing really did exactly what we wanted, we decided to let the whole thing function much like any other website. The point of difference is really the varied artist's work within it, and I guess the way we wanted the contributors to flavor things via text and imagery. I really hope that the simple approach worked! A 3D virtual experience would have been really wonderful, but... well, there were of course time limitations, and the limits of my own skill too. Were there any challenges or breakthroughs during the creative process? There were plenty of challenges along the way, but none of them were really worrisome. The biggest concern all along was doing justice to the fantastic music and art from all the contributors! I really hope we got it right, or at worst, can learn from this experience for next time. Working with multiple artists has its own challenges too of course, but everyone was really nice to coordinate with and supportive of the concept. I would say that it was a lot less stressful than organising real-life music performances, as we did in the past. How are you feeling about the release of "Enzymecomplex"? Are you excited to share it with your fans? Well, I hope that the artists who contributed are as excited I am! Quite nervous about it too, to be honest. Doing an online event is something completely new to us. We're sure that the artists are sharing the work with their fans, and we'll see how everything went once the event closes on the 20th October. We'll collect some feedback and then think about how we might approach such a project again in the future. It has certainly been fun! Can you give us a hint about what's next for Dawn Industry, Darkstereo or your other community arts projects? Honestly, I'm not sure what comes next. I'd really love to present a real-life concert series for the Melbourne Fringe Festival in 2025, with a focus on neoclassical, ambient and crossover music. The rest of 2024 will kind of determine if this can become a reality, as we reach out to artists and test the landscape so to say. I have no doubt that we "could" do it, and we've already uncovered a wonderful venue for such performances. Now the difficult part though... the logistics. It is a long road even once these things a committed too of course, with marketing and promotion requiring a lot of organisation and planning. Musically, folks who know me well always assume that some recording is happening behind the scenes. They wouldn't be wrong! I have projects currently working with a live bassist, a violinist, and also a 20 year anniversary album to finish off by 2026. It is nice to always have something to chip away at. What are your long-term goals for your music career? Are there any specific milestones or achievements you're striving for? That's an interesting question. I'm getting older by the minute, so long-term is a tricky thing to consider. Ideally, my hope is always just to continue exposing underground and independent art for as long as I am able. Playing, recording, and working on music is a life-long love too. I can't imagine not doing it in one form or another! As for achievements, in the near future it would be wonderful to be able to perform live again (with Minorarc's new band-mates), maybe work on a new music video or two, and then put an album together.

[qnewsau]

The Huxleys camp up queer sport for Melbourne Fringe

New Post has been published on https://qnews.com.au/the-huxleys-camp-up-queer-sport-for-melbourne-fringe/

The Huxleys camp up queer sport for Melbourne Fringe

Shining a queer spotlight on sports, The Huxleys invite you to join them in an interactive art exhibition happening during Melbourne Fringe.

Garrett and Will Huxley struggled growing up as queer creatives in a culture that values sport over pretty much everything.

“We had a horrible experience growing up with competitive sports being queer and not coordinated.” Will Huxley said,

“We were not athletic in any way and always wondered why there couldn’t there be more attention on the creative?”

Melbourne Fringe kicks off on Tuesday (October 1). The Huxleys are inviting you to be a part of The Winner Takes It All.

A grand slam queer takeover of the sporting world that’s part art happening, part grand final and part disco!

“Combining the queer and sporting worlds, we want to capture how it feels to be wearing heels or giant sequin capes for those who may be at odds with athleticism,” The Huxleys said.

“We want to bring things together that shouldn’t necessarily be on the sporting field.”

  View this post on Instagram

  A post shared by The Huxleys (@willhuxley)

Be a part of their iconic art

Over two Sundays during Melbourne Fringe, The Huxleys are inviting you to register for one or more days. You get to be a part of a large-scale photographic and participatory art happening, sharing in being part of their artistry and exploring your own as well.

“Normally we do everything ourselves, so at first it was a terrifying idea to invite people into to our process,” Will said.

“What we often wear is challenging and quite ridiculous so involving hundreds of people was daunting, but that’s the fun part about community making this artwork with us.”

You could be an over-eager spectator, sporting star, sporting failure, umpire, mascot, orange slice attendant or more.

Skill level isn’t a factor and as long are you are over 15, you can sign up to be a part of the photo shoot and a community celebration with queer halftime performances and DJs.

 “It is so exciting for community with different experiences of sport to be a part of making artwork with us as we combine these worlds,” Will said.

“When we started this project it was on a much smaller scale, but coming together and putting the art into the sport will create something that can’t be ignored.”

There’s a place for everyone

Whether you love or hate sport, it’s a chance to queer up the narrative.

“Using humour, we’re reclaiming what happened to us and repainting that story like sporting heroes,” Will said.

“Many queers have a complicated relationship with sports, while others have joyful stories so we are inviting all to participate in a way that’s special.”

A chance to be a part of sport but not have to be good at it. This free event has shoots involving cricket, footy, swimming and tennis. But you don’t have to wait for the day to get excited.

“While we will have costume elements on the day for some to wear, we want people to get inspired and be as creative as possible in a look that they’ve prepared themselves,” The Huxleys said.

“We will have wigs and masks if they don’t have anything, but we want to inspire people to bring their own flavour.”

Whatever sport means to you, camp up, step out of your comfort zone, celebrate who you are and be a part of something special.

The Winner Takes It All takes place on Sunday 6th and Saturday 12th October. Register to take part here.

For the latest LGBTIQA+ Sister Girl and Brother Boy news, entertainment, community stories in Australia, visit qnews.com.au. Check out our latest magazines or find us on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram and YouTube.

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Top Australian Events & Festivals of 2024 | Eazy Car Rentals’ Guide

Australia is renowned for its vibrant culture and lively events that captivate locals and visitors alike. As we step into 2024, the country’s event calendar is brimming with exciting festivals and celebrations across diverse regions. Whether you’re a music lover, a foodie, or an arts enthusiast, Australia has something to offer. Here’s a guide to some of the top events and festivals you won’t want to miss this year.

1. Sydney Festival (January 6–28, 2024) Kicking off the year, the Sydney Festival is a citywide celebration of arts and culture. With performances spanning music, theater, dance, and visual arts, this festival transforms Sydney into a hub of creativity. Highlights include free outdoor concerts, family-friendly activities, and breathtaking performances at iconic venues.

2. Melbourne Food and Wine Festival (March 1–10, 2024) For food enthusiasts, the Melbourne Food and Wine Festival is a culinary paradise. This event showcases the best of Australian cuisine, with an array of food stalls, cooking demonstrations, and exclusive dining experiences. Enjoy tastings from renowned chefs and local producers while exploring Melbourne’s vibrant food scene.

3. Brisbane Festival (September 1–30, 2024) Brisbane’s month-long festival offers a rich blend of music, theater, and visual arts. Highlights include the Riverfire fireworks display, spectacular street performances, and a diverse lineup of local and international artists. It’s an unmissable event for anyone looking to experience Brisbane’s cultural vibrancy.

4. Adelaide Fringe (February 16 — March 17, 2024) The Adelaide Fringe is one of the largest and most diverse arts festivals in the Southern Hemisphere. Featuring thousands of performances across theater, comedy, music, and dance, this event attracts artists from around the globe. The festival’s eclectic mix of shows and street performances creates a dynamic and exciting atmosphere.

5. Byron Bay Bluesfest (April 18–22, 2024) Set in the picturesque Byron Bay, this festival is a must for music lovers. Bluesfest brings together an impressive lineup of international and local artists across genres like blues, rock, and folk. Enjoy live performances in a beautiful outdoor setting, surrounded by stunning coastal views.

6. Perth International Arts Festival (February 9 — March 3, 2024) The Perth International Arts Festival offers a rich program of performances and visual arts. From world-class theater productions to captivating exhibitions, this festival celebrates creativity and culture in various forms. It’s a great opportunity to explore Perth’s artistic landscape.

7. Hobart’s Dark Mofo (June 7–23, 2024) Dark Mofo is a unique winter festival in Hobart that combines art, music, and dark, atmospheric experiences. Known for its provocative and immersive art installations, music performances, and the iconic Winter Feast, Dark Mofo offers a distinct and memorable festival experience.

Conclusion

With so many incredible events and festivals to choose from, 2024 promises to be a year full of memorable experiences across Australia. To make the most of your festival adventures, consider traveling with Eazy Car Rentals. Our wide range of affordable and reliable vehicles ensures you can explore the country’s top events comfortably and conveniently. Whether you’re heading to a bustling city festival or a remote regional celebration, Eazy Car Rentals is here to support your journey. Book with us today and get ready for an unforgettable year of celebrations across Australia!

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Discover the Rich Tapestry of Cultural Events in Australia with Event Baba

Australia, a land known for its stunning landscapes, is equally rich in cultural diversity. From the ancient traditions of its Indigenous peoples to the vibrant influences brought by immigrants, the cultural events in Australia are a testament to the nation's unique and diverse heritage. At Event Baba, we believe in celebrating this diversity by connecting you to the best cultural experiences across the country.

1. Vivid Sydney: A Festival of Light, Music, and Ideas

Vivid Sydney is more than just a festival; it's an immersive experience that transforms the city into a canvas of light and creativity. Held annually in May and June, this event showcases stunning light installations, music performances, and thought-provoking talks. As one of the most iconic cultural events in Australia, it attracts artists, innovators, and visitors from around the world.

Vivid Sydney is more than just a festival; it's an immersive experience that transforms the city into a canvas of light and creativity. Held annually in May and June, this event showcases stunning light installations, music performances, and thought-provoking talks. As one of the most iconic cultural events in Australia, it attracts artists, innovators, and visitors from around the world.

2. Melbourne International Arts Festival

Melbourne is often hailed as Australia’s cultural capital, and the Melbourne International Arts Festival is a shining example of why. Every October, the city comes alive with a dynamic mix of theater, dance, music, and visual arts. Whether you're a local or a visitor, Event Baba can help you navigate this cultural extravaganza and ensure you don’t miss any of the festival’s highlights.

3. Woodford Folk Festival

For those who prefer a more laid-back vibe, the Woodford Folk Festival in Queensland is a must-visit. This annual event, held over six days and nights, is a celebration of folk music, dance, and cultural exchange. It's one of the largest gatherings of its kind in Australia, offering a unique blend of performances, workshops, and discussions. Event Baba can guide you through the festival's extensive program, ensuring you make the most of your experience.

4. Adelaide Fringe Festival

Adelaide Fringe is the largest open-access arts festival in the Southern Hemisphere, offering a diverse range of performances, from circus acts to comedy shows. Spanning 31 days and nights in February and March, this festival turns Adelaide into a playground for artists and audiences alike. Event Baba can provide you with insider tips on the best shows and events to attend, making your Fringe experience unforgettable.

5. Sydney Gay and Lesbian Mardi Gras

A celebration of love, diversity, and acceptance, the Sydney Gay and Lesbian Mardi Gras is one of the most colorful cultural events in Australia. Held annually in February and March, this event features a parade that lights up the streets of Sydney with vibrant costumes and performances. At Event Baba, we believe in celebrating all forms of love and can help you be part of this joyous occasion.

6. NAIDOC Week

NAIDOC Week is a significant event that celebrates the history, culture, and achievements of Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples. Held every July, it offers a variety of events across Australia, including art exhibitions, cultural performances, and community festivals. Event Baba is here to help you connect with these important cultural events, fostering a deeper understanding and appreciation of Australia’s Indigenous heritage.

Experience Australia’s Cultural Events with Event Baba

No matter where you are in Australia or what kind of cultural experience you’re seeking, Event Baba is your go-to source for discovering and attending the best cultural events in the country. From the vibrant streets of Sydney to the artistic hubs of Melbourne, we’re here to make sure you don’t miss out on the rich cultural tapestry that makes Australia so unique.

Start planning your next cultural adventure with Event Baba today!

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Sam Campbell's 2016 show 'Zanzoop'.

"Kind of like Dr. Phil but hosted by a funny naked party-alien."

'Zanzoop' was a comedy show in (April-May) 2016 performed around Australia (Melbourne, Adelaide, Perth, Sydney). Created by Sam Campbell, Aaron Chen and Tom Walker in the collective 'Feeble Minds', Tom Walker directed and won Director's Choice Award at Melbourne International Comedy Festival in 2016.

Sam plays an alien called Zanzoop, a "semi-naked space alien, hosting a sort of chat show in an attempt to fix humanity’s problems and prove himself a worthy heir to the throne of Zymbalnation. And this is one of the more sober premises of the hour." (Steve Bennett, Chortle).

Craig Anderson, Sean Conway and Cameron Whiteford also made appearances on Zanzoop (the latter two appearing in Perth shows).

The show received 4 and 1/2 stars from Herald Sun. Here are some quotes from the Herald Sun article to get a sense of the show:

'Campbell began the show by saying "there’s a lot of reviewer c--ts in tonight. Oh, Steve from Chortle is here, it’s not as funny as a picture I once saw of Stewart Lee’s elbow!!"'

'“Youth culture baby” (Campbell does the Shaka sign)'

'Autism joke, well handled.'

'King Baby (actually played by a sunscreen-smeared Tom Walker who got a Best Newcomer nomination yesterday for his Beep Bop show, 6pm each night at Tuxedo Cat).' See picture below for King Baby on the far right.

'“I didn’t pay my rent because I bought too many props.” - Campbell breaking the fourth wall for the umpteenth time, he’s the John Conway of this year.'

This show also included the dip and vegetables gag, which Sam has done before: you can watch it in this video: Live at Comedy Central's 'A Night of Stand Up' at the 2016 Sydney Morning Herald Spectrum Now Festival and and on this Instagram post via thecomedyloungesydney.

Reviews of the show, I recommend reading if you want to know what the show was like (there's no videos of the show as far as I know):

The Plus Ones

Steve Bennett, Chortle

Herald Sun (4 and 1/2 stars)

Squirrel Comedy

Photo sources:

1) Herald Sun

2) pappy90 on TWT

3) Sean Conway on FaceBook (this one was at Fringe World)

4) guy_mont on TWT

5) Aaron Chen's tattoo of Zanzoop the alien

6) tomwalkerisgood on TWT, promotional poster.

Additional bits:

The strange promotion video Sam, Tom and Aaron did for Feeble Minds (thank you cowboyacaster on TWT)

Below: Aaron Chen reading the Herald Sun 4 and a 1/2 star review of Zanzoop to Sam Campbell (photo via tomwalkerisgood on TWT).