#Megatron the seeker perch

[ghost5host]

Hey, I like you! *Parent-ifies your Megatron*

Really inspired by the IDW designs for this one, obviously.

[revelboo]

Skin and Bones

Megatron x reader-Pet

• Megatron has no real idea where you came from. There’s just a human in the base now. He’s seen the Seekers carrying you around. In Skywarp’s case, upside down by your legs while you cling to his servos, face red. Nope. He has enough problems without this too, so the stray human the Seekers found isn’t going to be dealt with. It’s ignored.

• You gave up on escape attempts from the kidnapping giant robots after managing to squeeze yourself through the slats on a vent grate while unsupervised and getting hopelessly lost. You’d crawled without direction for hours, slowly sliding from uneasy, to concerned, to bawling because dying in a vent that you chose to go into with no real plan is that stupid.

• It’s hours before you’re missed and takes even longer for the Seekers to annoy Soundwave into figuring out what happened and where you are. You’re dragged out by a leg by a very annoyed Frenzy and you don’t even resist or bother trying to get free to at least walk on your own. Your dignity can take the hit, because you really thought you were going to die in the vents like a particularly dumb, escaped hamster.

• Now you have a constant babysitter, because they’ve decided you’re probably dumb enough to try it again. And yeah, you probably do need to try to escape the Decepticons, but for giant, evil aliens, they’re not that bad. Except Skywarp. He’s an absolute, feral menace.

• And it’s not just the Seekers anymore. After your humiliating rescue, Soundwave has now decided you’re his pet, too. Or maybe because you’re small, he’s just decided to adopt you like a squishy, particularly helpless casseticon. You have no idea, but they’re never going to let the vent incident go. Ever. That’s you now.

• It’s been months since Megatron last saw one of the Seekers toting the human around, he’d mostly forgotten all about. Up until Soundwave enters with the thing clutched in a servo. At least, he thinks it’s probably the same one. Who knows? He still has zero interest in dealing with that situation and as long as there’s not multiple humans loose, he’s not.

• Except when he commands Soundwave to go on a reconnaissance excursion, the stoic mech hesitates. And looks down at the human curiously looking around the space. Then he just sets the thing down on the arm of his chair before leaving. Not asking if Megatron could or would watch it.

• And it just stares after Soundwave with something funnily like horrified betrayal before silently slumping in place. Annoyance lifts through him and he grumbles under his breath, the growl making it glance back at him before hunkering down to try and make itself even smaller. As if he’d forget it’s there.

• Maybe they finally got tired of you, because Soundwave just plunked you down with the big bad. Megatron. Starscream’s favorite flavor of angry ranting. So you try to be as small and inconspicuous as possible while wondering if you should just fling yourself off the giant chair and hope the fall gets you, because as terrifying as the Seekers are most of the time, what you’ve heard about this alien? He’s definitely going to murder you. Slowly.

• Except, he just vents softly and resumes reading a giant tablet of crazy, alien gibberish. Alright. Good. Scooting yourself closer to the edge, you lean out and try to decide if there’s any chance of climbing down. A low growl of annoyance and a big servo nudges you back into the middle of your perch. And you freeze again because those angry, red optics are staring a hole in you.

• Huffing to himself, he curls his servos loosely around the human to keep it from jumping headfirst off his chair. He can feel the warmth of it and the frantic beat of its heart as it braces a tiny palm on his and looks up at him in question, which he ignores. It’s not like he cares about the squishy thing. He doesn’t, but he isn’t interested in the mess it’d make splatting on the floor. That’s all.

• He certainly doesn’t watch its little head nodding off or feel anything at all when it lays its cheek against his scarred palm like it’s not terrified of him and drops into its organic recharge in his hand. And he pretends he wasn’t running a single servo down its spine when Soundwave returns for it. Ignores the look from his old friend, too.

• He doesn’t care about the human, but he supposes Soundwave can leave you with him when no one else can watch you. He doesn’t care.

Next

[ultracreativelywritten]

How about Starscream being all mothering towards his trine, Shockwave, Soundwave + his cassettes, and Megatron? How would they react? (All transformers generations you're familiar with.)

G1

Megatron and Shockwave find it annoying, and don’t want to be coddled

Soundwave is thankful, someone else is trying to keep his younglings safe

Rumble and Frenzy try to prove that don’t need protection

Ravage likes being carried around

Buzzsaw and Lazerbeak like perching on the seeker’s wings

Ratbat tries to avoid the seeker when he can

Tc and Warp like cuddles in private, not in public though

Animated

Megatron likes being doted on, and tries to keep Starscream away from the battlefield as much as he can

The seeker is more like a medic than anything

Shockwave hates being doted on, and does his best to avoid Starscream

Soundwave has no idea what’s going on

Tc is stubborn when it comes to Starscream’s mothering tendencies, Warp loves that Star is safe and not scary

Prime

Megatron hates being doted on, and often pawns the seeker off on Soundwave

Soundwave and Starscream care for each other, as they know how much the other has lost

Shockwave uses Predaking to try and get out of Starscream’s mothering nature, and it backfires when Predaking starts being more loyal to Starscream

Star is very protective of the human children, almost sacrificing himself to keep them safe

Bots are thankful and a bit skeptical when Star gives the children back

Star will lecture the bots about the safety of the children

Lord help them if Starscream ever finds out about Griffin Rock

Cyberverse

All the seekers have to put up with an over protective Starscream, as the seeker is in charge of them

Megs deals with the overprotectiveness, and tries to get Starscream to start his own blog to try and get the cons more freedom

Shockwave hates Starscream’s mothering nature

Soundwave just wants to have fun, and wants Starscream to loosen up a bit

The Autobots are not safe from Starscream’s mothering nature

Hot Rod, Bumblebee, and Windblade have gotten their fair share of lectures from the seeker, as well as cuddles

Earthspark

Star feels betrayed by Megatron, and doesn’t know why Megatron locked him up

Is Soundwave’s support system after the loss of his Cassette, and the other cassettes do trust star still

Skywarp misses Starscream and wants to get him out, but doesn’t know how to keep Star out of the fire fight. Warp wishes that Thundercracker would join her and hep Starscream out.

Armada

Only protective of Alexis

Cares much about the human girl, and wants for her best

Will rescue the other kids, and tries to hide that he cares about them and the other Autobots

Only joins back with the cons so that way they won’t be hurt by Megatron

Energon

Starscream acts on instinct, protecting those who need help

With his memory loss, he knows that he’s missing someone and doesn’t know who it is

[anony-man]

Read it here under the cut or over on ao3!

Chubformers drabble #127!

Characters: Starscream (& trine - G1)

Word count: 1.8k

Megatron was gone again, which meant Starscream was in charge.

Technically, the boastful seeker’s claim to leadership while Megatron was away only applied to those willing to follow along, which was no more than the few bored Cons with nothing better to do and his loyal command trine, but Starscream was going to milk it for all of was worth while it lasted. Their beloved leader was away for the time being, and as the second in command over all of the Decepticon soldiers, it was only right that he see himself to his temporary duties.

The throne had never looked so good as it did with Starscream warming its seat, and he stood by that claim. The flier sat perched with one pede crossed over the other and his servos folded behind his helm as he overlooked the working bots below him. It was another day of simply sitting around and waiting for Megatron to return so they could plan another failure of a mission against the Autobots, and while he had at first been tempted to take matters into his own hands and finish the job himself, Starscream had quickly grown busy with much more important tasks.

Triumph over their sworn enemies was the biggest goal, of course, but fueling the fight was a very close second. No mech could last long without precious energon to fill there bellies, and while Megatron was off looking for ways to one up Optimus Prime, Starscream stayed loyal to their cause—the Decepticon cause, that is.

As Starscream sat atop the throne (or his throne, as he had been calling it all morning), he drummed his fingers against the armrest and observed his quiet companions standing before him. They watched the entrance with their backs to their commander, awaiting Shockwave’s return, but the air of annoyance that emanated from them both was hardly affected.

Starscream claimed to take his faction’s needs seriously, and did so before all else… supposedly. In Megatron’s absence, he had not only seen to it that everything was in order amongst his soldiers, he had also gone out and found not one, but two new sources of fuel. It would last them weeks, if not months, and the proud commander had still been patting himself on the back for it hours after.

No amount of turned-up noses or scowling faces had put Starscream off of parading his findings right into the labs, and while he couldn’t spare precious hours working away at grinding the florescent crystals down into a drinkable source of fuel, he knew plenty of bots who could. It was the only downside of leaving Shockwave on Cybertron, as he now had to wait twice as long for his newly acquired (and newly discovered) resources. Alas, despite having earned his right to a moment of silence spent basking in the afterglow of his achievements, there was always something—or someone—there to spoil it. He supposed it was a blessing that this time, at least, it wasn’t Megatron.

“I still can’t believe you’re actually going to drink that stuff,” Thundercracker said, shaking his helm as he turned back to look at his commander. “Are you even sure it’s edible?”

His poorly concealed worry was cut short by a sharp jab in the side from Skywarp, who was still snickering to himself about the whole ordeal.

“If our great new leader wants to try some unidentifiable slag he found somewhere, let him try it,” he said. “Maybe it’ll knock some sense into that—“

“Silence, both of you!” Starscream snapped. “That unidentifiable slag’ is a fresh source of energon. Believe me, I would know.”

If the obnoxious air quotes weren’t bad enough, his insistence on calling the disgusting mix of chunky crystals and slime during a brief energon retrieval certainly was. Starscream was in no mood to hear any kind of criticism about the great thing he had done, and his trine apparently didn’t get that.

“My days spent in one of Cybertron’s top academies weren’t for naught, I’ll have you know,” he continued. “I have a knack for sourcing the best energon out there, and that’s something you two idiots could learn from.”

Their argument was cut short by swinging doors and an entourage of Decepticons marching in, their arms full of trays stacked high with the glowing energon cubes. Its murky colors were far more unappealing in a diluted liquid form. Regardless, Starscream didn’t hesitate to snatch one off of the nearest tray after rising from Megatron’s throne and meeting his soldiers at the bottom.

It was finally time to put everyone’s doubts to shame, and he couldn’t bear to wait a minute longer.

“Just look at this rich new fuel,” he said, lifting the cube to the light and giving it a swirl. “It’s a fantastic find, and yet you fools are stupid enough to pass up the opportunity of trying something great!”

No amount of bragging seemed to change the sour stares of onlookers, and for good reason. Starscream’s new findings slapped against the sides of the container rather than sloshed, and unlike the thin liquid and pleasant glow to their go-to for fuel, its dark color and ominous appearance made it look much less appealing. Nevertheless, Starscream took his self-appointed role very seriously, and this strange discovery that likely should have been left behind closed doors in the darkest level of their base was instead presented for the brave bots still willing to stick around and see.

“Never mind your insolence, all of you,” he spat, bracing one servo on his hip while he brought the cube to his lips with the other. “I’ll simply have to show you all what you’re missing after I savor this delicious fuel for myself.”

Much to everyone’s surprise, Starscream did just that. The slimy, sickening substance that clung to the sides of the cube peeled itself free as he tilted his helm back and opened his maws wide. The tip of his tongue stuck out over his chin as he poured it out in its entirety, then snapped his jaw shut with a smack of his lips. His throat bulged against the huge mouthful, and Starscream was hardly free from straining to swallow it down, but after a few seconds of tense silence, he was successful.

The stubborn seeker’s face was twisted into a look of disgust, but despite the waver to his words, he kept his attitude up and held the empty cube high.

“You see?” he shouted, pausing only to choke back the belch that crept up his throat. His cheeks flushed pink against the embarrassing sound, but his rant wasn’t over. “All of you—urrrp—guh, you… idiots. You fail to trust me, your leader, yet here I stand, healthy and fed. The future of the Decepticons is in my servos, and I—!”

Another noisy belch interrupted his dramatic speech, but instead of brushing it aside and continuing on, Starscream stopped in his tracks. His empty cube clattered to the floor as he slapped a servo to his mouth, his optics going wide.

“Eating your own words,” Thundercracker said with a sigh, “what a surprise.”

There was no rebuttal this time, much to both his and Skywarp’s surprise. The command trine crept closer as Starscream’s expression turned more frantic, and around them, the Decepticons who had lingered long enough to witness whatever mess he was getting himself into did the opposite.

“Ah… you good?” Skywarp asked, extending a tentative servo out to their commander. “You look kinda…”

Purple, he was going to say. Purple like something sick and dying, though, not purple like him. Starscream’s complexion had taken on a similar hue to the fuel he had so recklessly drank, and it wasn’t pretty. They needed a medic now, and that was clear enough. Before either stunned seeker could so much as suggest leaving their stunned leader alone to succumb to whatever ailment he was suffering, however, things took a turn for the worst—or the stranger, depending on who you asked.

Their fears may have been blown out of proportion before, but the only thing being blown up now was Starscream’s… well… everything. The poor seeker’s cheeks puffed up wide before anything, and the unmistakable dribble of that nasty fuel he’d drank stained his chin in thick, regurgitated streaks as he gurgled and shrieked. Both Skywarp and Thundercracker scrambled for cover as Starscream all but inflated like a balloon, his belly bloating up into the shape of Cybertron while his arms and legs were left to helplessly wave in the air.

“Grhggg!” he shouted, his cheeks too puffed to allow for coherent words. “Mrrrphh!”

“I think he says we should get a medic,” Thundercracker said, risking a few steps back to poke at the bloated mesh of Starscream’s belly. Oddly enough, it was soft to the touch. “I’m not liking the looks of this.”

“What, and spare him the chance to reap the consequences of his actions?” Skywarp spat. “And I thought I was the dumb one.”

It was true, Thundercracker had to admit. Starscream looked pretty funny flailing around like that. Still, most mechs didn’t just… expand.

“It’s not hurting him,” he said, “but it can’t be comfortable.”

“Serves him right for drinking unidentified fuel,” Skywarp shrugged. “Isn’t that right, oh great and powerful leader, Starscream?”

The poor, bloated seeker was given another poke to his expanded belly, but not one nearly as gentle as Thundercracker’s had been. He wobbled on his pedes and waved his servos, both of which hardly moved from the amount of fat that had expanded from his middle. He was as big as a shuttle now, and fatter than any bot should ever be. Still, at least he was still standing…

…or not.

As Starscream frantically waved his servos and tried to speak around the fat of his cheeks—and his tongue, and everything, really—, he started to wobble in place. Neither of his trine seemed all that willing to help him out, of course, which meant poor Starscream was left to topple to the floor to squirm on his back and struggle all the more.

“Hah!” Skywarp snorted. “He’s kinda cute like that, don’t you think?”

“Much more tolerable, that’s for sure,” Thundercracker said. “You wait here with him. I’ll go find Hook.”

Thank Primus for mechs like Thundercracker, Starscream thought to himself. It didn’t make up for this embarrassing display, or the fact that the entirety of the Decepticon faction would know by nightfall how ridiculous a leader he really was, or even that Skywarp couldn’t stop laughing long enough to help him back up!

So maybe his new little discovery wasn’t all it was cracked up to be… he knew one thing, though, and that was that despite it all, he still made a much better leader than Megatron ever would be. All he had to do now was get back up on his pedes, find a cure for this fragging mess, and get rid of all traces of the little oopsie moment from this morning. Megatron needn’t know a thing about this whole experience.

Really, Starscream hoped Megatron never learned a thing about this.

[brandwhorestarscream]

I had a bizarre dream in which Seekers were basically treated as vicious, feral pigeons despite being fully sapient. They basically got shooed away with a broom if they became too bothersome.

And Megatron was just some guy in this who had managed to get the highest apartment in a building which meant it was the cheapest for Reasons™. It's all he could afford as a struggling poet.

And by living there he had somehow managed to seduce Starscream who'd just sit outside his window until he let him in??

What a romance.

This is so funny its 4 a.m. and that's the funniest shit to me. Seekers as deranged pigeons that just perch wherever they please? Amazing

[blueskyscribeupdates]

Secure Own Oxygen Mask

Chapter 36: Decepticon, Introducing Lithe Frame

You wake up two hours early.  Defrag your subroutines.  Check your new frame for nicks and dents. Give it a quick polish.  You are . . . not apprehensive, exactly, but you want to make a good first impression.  You had submitted the appropriate form, asking for permission to add flight capability to your frame, and Megatron had approved it with such speed that you wonder if he read it.

You want to be something new and better.  You want to hold tight to the ties to your shared past.

Maybe you should have forwarded him the blueprints.  It's too late now.

You go next door to wake the cassettes. They need a polish too.

Ravage and Laserbeak often accompany you to the command deck, the other two not so often.  But today Buzzsaw declares she "wouldn't miss it for the world."

"I can't wait to see their faces," she chuckles.

"Whose?" Frenzy asks.

"Everyone's.  This will be amazing."

Frenzy bristles at this. "What are you talking about, ya bird-brain? Soundwave looks great."

"Exactly."

You pause, shadowed in the doorway. Ravage is tucked in your chest, and Buzzsaw glides on ahead, veering off to perch on a computer bank as you enter the command deck.  (Later you will discover that she positioned herself to record your entrance "for posterity.") The other two cassettes are absent; though Frenzy begged to come, you know she would find the command deck dull.  When she is bored, she tends to cause trouble.  You want to make a good impression.

The bots present do not immediately register your proximity.  Megatron and Starscream are on the upper deck, leaning over Skywarp's shoulder to examine something on the radar; Thundercracker (ostensibly monitoring the security cameras) is on the lower deck, leaning his chin on his palm and showing an unacceptable level of sloth.

"Idiot!" Starscream is scowling as he jabs a finger at the radar screen.  "Those aren't enemy aircraft, they're Seekers on patrol."

"Well, how was I supposed to know?" Skywarp protests.

Megatron huffs out a sigh, half-relieved, half-exasperated.  "Had you kept abreast of the flight schedule, Skywarp . . ."

Her pout intensifies.  "Nobody sent one out."

Of course they hadn't; you do that.

"Megatron." You step into the light.  "Soundwave: reporting for duty."

They all turn to look at you.  Thundercracker goggles. Skywarp's jaw drops.  Starscream freezes for a moment, then clenches his jaw.  Megatron's only change in expression is a slight widening of his optics as he looks you up and down.

"Soundwave."  Does Megatron sound a trifle . . . unsure?  "Welcome back.  I hope your time away has benefited you."

You are eager to show him your new capabilities, so you simply give a concise nod and move to your usual station, which is adjacent to Thundercracker's current position.

"So, uh." He glances towards you.  "What's with the new look?"

  What a silly question. "New alt mode. Reformatting: necessary."

Skywarp drifts down the ramp to give her two cents.  "Yeah, but like, why's it so . . ." She holds her hands shoulder width apart before sweeping them down and inward, then outward again.

"Skywarp." Megatron rumbles.  "Return to your duties."

". . . right, boss."

You busy yourself with your work as well.  There is so much to catch up on: schedules to be set, comms to be sent, antiviruses to be run.  Despite this, you notice the looks.  That Starscream is staring daggers is unsurprising—no doubt he enjoyed being out from under your watchful eye—but Megatron, too, keeps glancing your way.  Perhaps, despite his welcoming words, he has his doubts about your abilities; perhaps he thinks you have sacrificed your command of the airwaves in this new form.  You could tell him this is not the case, but you would rather show him.

You lean over your workstation, too focused to pay any mind to Skywarp's whistle (a high tone followed by a low tone) or Starscream's subsequent cuff to her helm.

[ace-of-pythons]

OK so this au has been bouncing around in my head for a little bit now so I figured I'd throw to Tumblr

So post-predacons rising, Knockout works as a medic for the autobots and is the main medic, since ratchet is on earth. Eventually bots, cons and neutrals begin returning. Medics like first aid and velocity then take control of medical facilities. Eventually people don't want a medic without a medical degree. Because of this knockout kinda gets kicked out.

Flash over to shockwave who has been hiding out in one of his underground laboratories. He has been helping predaking, skylinx, and darksteel recreate their species. The lab has a large ceiling and resembles a dome of sorts, but it has little ledges that they perch on.

Somehow, predaking finds knockout and brings him back to shock's lab. Shockwave agrees to give shelter to knockout in return for another approach to restoration of a species. They work on the project and eventually, Knockout starts his own side project. He starts trying to recreate cybertron's flora. Eventually, he recreates a few species of "plants". A type of copper wire vine, energon flowers, a weeping bolt tree, and other things. Soon flowers are all over the lab. Shockwave decided to expand the lab and discovered a natural energonfall. The first one discovered in over 4 million years.

The two scientists decided to not stop at just predacons and a few plants. They recovered fossilized remains of many life forms. Avian species of Vos, the burrowing species of kaon, the marine life of the praxian energon pools, and many many others. They kept many of the flora and fauna in the lab to monitor their behavior. Eventually they released some of the creatures onto the surface.

Sometime after, the autobots discovered the source of the sudden animal re-population of cybertron. They offered shockwave and knockout an official job and started building an above ground lab connected to the original.

So now they have this huge lab where there's animals living in both labs. Eventually bumblebee suggests that anyone struggling to readjust to post-war life, anyone struggling to make a living, and anyone who needs a fresh start, can live at or near the labs and help out with all the chores at the lab. Misfire, fulcrum, blitzwing, whirl, Soundwave, and even starscream will help out. (Even though screamer only stops by occasionally. Soundwave always helps with the feline and Avian species.) They get housing and food, and they don't have to interact with the people they hate. (Knockout keeps track of rivalries to separate them in the schedule). Eventually they start to rehabilitate the planet's diversity and some of the people as well.

And if at one point shockwave saw knockout getting excited about new flower species, and wanted to feel some of that excitement about all of this. And if they worked on a way to slowly reverse the shadowplay, no one has to know.

People do know. They notice it slowly. Shockwave is still a bit cold towards people, but his kindness for the creatures he brought back from extinction is very obvious. Someone who knew him before the war actually started to recognize him again. When he made a small pun knockout couldn't stop smiling. Knockout himself found something that he can finally get behind and adore. He finds himself caring more about the turbofoxes and drones of paradise than his finish. (When he realized this, he had a mental break down.)

Overtime, they helped spread life into cybertron. Although the alspark was starting to create life again, these scientists helped excellerate the process. Beautiful rivers of energon are now filled with aquatic species with banks of delicate flowers, and skies are filled with seekers and bird drones.

When Megatron comes back to cybertron to deposit the djd in prisons, he stood over cybertron and saw that the world he destroyed was healing. He smiled before continuing his journey to right even the smallest bit of the crimes and atrocities he committed.

[artobotsrollout]

Headcanon that Starscream has a tendency to just sorta perch on things sometimes.

Megatron has a standing order that if anyone tells his Second in Command about how it's 'unusual behaviour' they are to be immediately executed because he absolutely loves seeing the unnerved expressions everyone gets from this cryptid gargoyle of a mech just chilling on high objects.

This is not a seeker thing but exclusively a Starscream thing.

Dreadwing almost had a spark attack once when he heard Starscream cackle and call him a showoff from god only knows where during a battle where he swore it was just him and one autobot in the area. Sure maybe he was doing more sword tricks than strictly necessary but HEY RUDE!

Breakdown asked Megatron about it once and the warlord couldn't really give a solid answer beyond 'I think he enjoys feeling tall.'

It's not super goofy looking either he somehow manages to make it look elegant and intimidating. Knockout asked Breakdown to boost him on top of some spare energon cubes once because he was curious and... even he looked goofy as all hell. How the ever loving hell Starscream pulls it off is a mystery.

Starscream got super drunk on high grade once and perched on high, but fairly well hidden spots in the rec room and other communal areas and whispered the dumbest rumours during crowded hours to make it seem as though anyone could have said it. He also chucked small rocks at crew members every now and then and quietly cackled at the baffled and slightly offended confusion. He still refuses to correct the rumours he started and it takes all his willpower not to laugh anytime he hears them. Some of them have evolved too and he thinks it's the funniest shit.

Rumours that are absolutely made up but Starscream refuses to correct:

-Knockout is the reason Soundwave wears a mask all the time. Soundwave should never have scratched his finish. (Knockout actually appreciates this one for the fear factor it instills and Soundwave hasn't corrected it cause he thinks it's hilarious. He may have once or twice even stoked the fire of this rumour)

-Megatron and Optimus are secretly an item currently and just good at hiding it. (cue knowing looks and nudges from vehicons whenever Megatron tries to get Optimus's attention.)

-Megatron was never actually a gladiator, he just was super into fighting movies and payed for body mods to look cool.

-Optimus was not an archivist but the real gladiator who just liked to read a lot.

-Megatron is a lightweight. (Megatron enjoys proving this rumour wrong to the shame of the asker. It's still around cause no one wants to admit how Megatron absolutely decimated them in drinking games like they were a beginning game NPC who challenged Megs and his level 100 Charizard.)

-Megatron is Breakdown's brother. (Cue a seriously confused Breakdown.)

-Ratchet was always that strong and good a fighter. Synth-en had nothing to do with it beyond making him more impulsive. Team Prime had to nerf him so their medic didn't make them all look bad.

-Soundwave is basically the cybertronian equivalent of a demon. Only a select few cybertronians can see him and if you can see him don't look at him or talk about him unless you want him going all enderman on your ass.

-Humans eat Dark Energon being the spawn of Unicron and everything.

-Airachnid is what happens when you mix spiders and bad energon.

-Breakdown lost his eye because he looked at Soundwave and Soundwave went all enderman on his ass.

-Starscream has already killed Megatron and taken over. Megatron is actually just a cloned puppet that Soundwave and Starscream use to keep subjects loyal.

-Knockout personally did the Empurata procedure on Shockwave (the whole remove head and replace with single optic deal ) . Shockwave never should have scratched his finish.

-Megatron and Optimus are secretly the same guy.

-Starscream is Amalgamous Prime in disguise

-Megatron once punched his own reflection because it 'looked at him funny'

-Knockout and Bumblebee are the same guy.

-The human Illuminati conspiracy is actually Soundwave brainwashing popular humans to do his bidding.

-Megatron eats humans sometimes.

-Megatron eats vehicons sometimes

-Megatron is a bad dancer (No one knows if this is true or false, not even Starscream. Drunk Starscream just thought a rumour about it would be really funny.)

-Megatron is bad at math.

LISTEN Starscream started so many unflattering ones about Megatron.

[dumb-but-also-red]

👏it's👏Autobot 👏Starscream 👏time 👏

This is gonna be long so prepare yourselves.

Headcanon: since he's a seeker, he's gonna want to form a trine. But there are no fliers in Team Prime, so he will be lonely. He accepts that and pretends to be okay with it.

If he hangs out with Fowler, he's gonna have access to the hangar, and if he is left unsupervised near the hangar he probably would try to chat with the human made jets whenever he can. What if there's a cybertronian among them? No one knows.

He would 100% perch on Magnus' shoulders. The larger mech is annoyed with the new recruit, but lets him do it since he knows a bit about what the seeker had to suffer from Megatron's unfiltered rage. Magnus is there to lead the wreckers, as Optimus' second in command, not a torturer to further traumatize his soldiers.

He would probably ask Ratchet if he has some spare paint laying around. This version of Starscream wants some bright colors on his frame, something flashy but also fashionable. He doesn't like how his factory made frame looks, it's so dull and lifeless.

(you can disagree with me on this but idc man he'd be cute as shit in G1 colors)

He most definitely would LOVE to get his wings rubbed or gently scratched. He never allowed anyone near them before, so maybe the first few times he's a little scared to let others touch him where he can't reach.

He purrs in his sleep. Loudly. Starscream doesn't really see the connection between himself and the earth animal called a cat, there's no physical similarities, but the humans insist he's a big flying cat.

He loves headpats and being praised. Call him a good boy and his spark will radiate with happiness.

He is really ticklish. Ratchet is the only one who knows this.

He is afraid of medical examinations of any kind.

He is very claustrophobic. Put him in a small space and he'll start shaking like a leaf in the wind. Whenever they have to leave the base and he has to get into Optimus' trailer, he tries to make excuses and not sit in the tight, dimly lighted box. The kids put some more lights and a lot of soft blankets in the trailer to make him a bit more comfortable.

Starscream isn't afraid of showing his emotional weaknesses anymore. The feeling of belonging came with the comfort of being able to cry and hug people openly. The first time he hid and cried at the base because all of the pressure, Miko just sniffed him out like a bloodhound and hugged him like he wasn't the one threatening to kill her a few months ago.

He would die for the humans. They're so nice to him after all he has done, and they even offer their limited time to just talk about what he's thinking or feeling. No one has ever done that for him, so he obviously wasn't expecting that. Especially from organic creatures who's lifespan is over in a blink of an optic.

Raf made him play a video game once, and now he can't just stop it. It's so much fun to play, some of them are like battle simulators, some are racing games, but they're all very amusing.

---

I'm so very sorry for blabbing about my headcanons on Mr. "imma overthrow Megs" Starscream I just had to do this or my brain wouldn't let me relax

[cybertronian-cupid]

I'm feeling really uneasy having to spend the holiday season with my family, so, if that's not a problem, could I request some fluff with TFP decepticons? Like,, comforting their s/o, making sure they feel safe and happy?

You didn't specify which ones you'd like best, so *rubs back of neck* what happened was a bit of a fluff surprise story. Hopefully it makes you smile Anon, and makes the holidays atleast a little more bearable.

*squints* though I think we should have the comfort styles of the Cons written somewhere... Keep an eye out, they'll be posted as soon as they get pieced together in some semblance of sense. ~Gregoria🏩

We hope you like it, Anon, and we hope this holiday season treats you well. You deserve nothing but happiness~Mila 💟

Holiday Surprise Fluff: Poly!Reader x TFP Decepticons (sfw)

(Yes. All of them. That includes the troops.)

............ ............ ............ ............ ............ ............

Being partners with Steve had its perks. Sure, there were some drawbacks as well, but considering how close all Vehicons were, that just meant the human suddenly had a whole lot of love and support, when one of these aliens decided to zoom into their life.

And well, when Breakdown met them and saw just how close the other guys are with them, and how nice they are treated by this fleshie, who's to blame the poor mech for falling for them too?

Knockout flirted with them once, and caught feelings when they laughed and flirted right back at him.

The rest of the ship caught feelings for the little organic faster than the cosmic rust, with the High Command being the most confused and vary over trying to express their feelings about it.

After all, their human isn't just a partner of one Steve.

They are a partner of all Steves, and soon of the Insecticon troops as well, with officers falling prey to their charms one after the other. In a sense, they have the whole ship wrapped around their tiny fingers, and soon they earn the affection of the Communications officer, Second in command and the Lord of Decepticons as well.

With ALOT of compromising and weekly reminders amongst the top three, that their human loves everyone aboard the Nemesis. The whole Nemesis.

How they manage that, remains a mystery to everyone aboard and yet, the morale has never been higher, so who is going to look a gift horse in the mouth? Noone, that's who.

🔸🔸🔸🔸🔸🔸🔸🔸🔸🔸

Steve drives them through the groundbridge straight into the command center.

Sondwave greets them with a merry tune, Lazerbeak chirping happily as they are swooped up into familiar well maintained servos.

"Here you are, " Knockout kisses their face all over, before glaring at Steve. "If I remember correctly, today was MY turn to pick OUR lovely fleshie up"

"But you just did sir," Steve answers prompting a groan out of Knockout, before rushing off towards the barracks laughing.

"So, what ARE you guys planning?"

"We can't tell you just yet," Dreadwing smiles at them. Skyquake is leaning against his twin, nodding.

"It would ruin the surprise."

They pout and look at the ceiling.

"Not even an itsy-bitsy clue? Come onnnn, you guys have been driving me crazy for long enough."

Airachnid giggles, skittering off her perch and extending a welcoming servo for them to step on. She holds them close to her spark, heels clicking as she walks.

"Not even that. Orders from the Second in Command."

"I thought you were ALSO Second in command."

"Who isn't at this point," Shockwave points out when the femme places them in his servo, pressing a quick kiss before dragging the two warriors with her, off to who-knows-where. Being carried and placed from servo to servo was a thing that took some time to get used to, and yet, they are always handled with such care and love they can't really stay mad at their partners for too long.

They gaze up into the red optic staring at them.

"Shockyyyyy,"

"No,"

"Shockerrrrs,"

"The answer is still no," his voice is firm and unyielding, but his finials are wiggling in amusement.

Whatever the others are preparing is clearly going to be good.

"Come on, can't you just tell me? " they try again, genuine laughter from the Warlord snapping their attention to the entrance. Disappointment setting in when he is not actually standing there.

>>Patience, little one,<< the recording echoes from Soundwave, who steps through the groundbridge a moment later, with parting words of

"And enjoy the show."

🔸🔸🔸🔸🔸🔸🔸🔸🔸🔸

And what a show it was. Almost an hour of all fliers, spinning and looping around each other, acrobatics of transforming mid-flight to blow them a kiss, before transforming again and resuming what has clearly been practiced time and time again with how perfect their forms were.

They couldn't look away even if they tried, each segment of them all dancing in the air grander than the last, topped off by Predaking creating rings of fire for them all to fly through.

It was a spectacle of the kind they have never seen.

Their excitement has them almost jumping in place when all commanders return to the bridge, optics twinkling with glee at their s/o and their clear enjoyment and pride.

"That was just the start," Starscream smirks knowingly, with Breakdown presenting them with a thick coat.

"Just wait till you see what our Liege has in store for you,".

🔸🔸🔸🔸🔸🔸🔸🔸🔸🔸

They honestly expected a gladiator match. Hardshell, Dreadwing and Skyquake against Megatron and Soundwave. Or perhaps some sort of a firing range, or anything that would indicate a show of strength, or precision and cunning. They wouldn't be surprised if the Warlord somehow decided to do it all inside of an ice cave just for the extra challenge.

They didn't expect to be taken to one of the empty mines.

They did not expect there to be decorations put up, a mix of what they know to be Cybertronian designs with different Earth influences mixing into them all and still looking stunning in their own way.

And they did not expect every grounder of the Nemesis to be present.

"What is all this?" they ask, their eyes roaming over everyone. Their frames polished, their engines humming in sync, as they all break into a song.

A song about them.

They caught a glimpse of the title one night, when Megatron forgot to put that particular datapad away.

"Oh it's nothing," he waved their question off, settling them down in their bed above his berth.

"Megs, what are you planning?"

His grin and a tilt of his helm had them laughing, the expression on their face earning them a chuckle of his own, and yet no answer beyond the teasing "You'll see".

Any questions directed at others about what they think could be in the works, were met with the same grin and chuckles of "You'll see, it's a surprise."

Arms wrap around them from behind.

"Happy holidays," Steve says, nuzzling his helm against their head.

"Care for a dance?"

Dating Steve had many perks. Dating the whole Nemesis, has around a million more. And they have all night to count them all, as they dance and laugh with their wretched, evil, horrible, no good Decepticons.

At a house somewhere on the planet, there stands a very, very irked Makeshift, currently tangled in strings of lights, reminding himself that he is a vital part of the operation "Our Human Will Have The Best Holiday Celebration". He's been bossed around this way and that, without much rhyme or reason for a week now, and at this point, he would much prefer to listen to a certain Seeker screaming his voicebox raw, than to be listening to yet another round of 'All I want for Christmas'.

He will have someones spark if he isn't the one that gets to cuddle with The Spark of Nemesis for at least a week after his mission is complete. He knows those will be well deserved after the madness he's being put through.

[robuttsinyourthighs]

Can we get some hc (and nsfw hc’s) of starscream being in a poly relationship with the decepticons

LONG POST AHEAD OH BOY. Please hit me up with others specifically if you want them since I might not cover each con.

Okay first and foremost we have the given Knock Out x Breakdown x Starscream poly relationship

Starscream is insecure because he joined their relationship well after theirs was fully established.

He didn’t know how to conduct himself the first few times they were all alone and trying to get intimate because the dynamic had shifted and he didn't feel in control and still struggles with it

There's a lot of trust issues that they need to work through and it isn't easy

Starscream thinks Breakdown didn't want him and was just tolerating him with Knock Out for the longest time but then learns Breakdown was the one that had wanted him to be welcomed into the relationship.

In berth they like to sandwich Starscream whenever possible.

Knock Out and Breakdown Eiffel towered Starscream and got away with the finishing high five ONCE. The second time didn't end up so pretty.

When they find out that Starscream enjoys his wings being cleaned Breakdown takes full advantage of that intel by always buffing him until he gets overcharged.

Starscream finds out Breakdown has never been fully satisfied with his valve so the commander teams up to double stuff him with Knock Out and they now alternate who gets sandwiched.

Starscream struggles with jealousy since sometimes the two like to have alone time with just one another but he’s getting better and starting to trust that he isn’t going to be cast aside.

Starscream told them from day one he doesn’t like pet names.

Breakdown calls him Screamer.

Knock Out calls him Star or Screamy.

Next we have Shockwave X Soundwave X Starscream

Starscream was approached over some lovely high grade by Soundwave to consider some fun times with himself and Shockwave

Shockwave just wanted to watch

After some casual encounters they wanted to make it more official and Starscream, being Starscream, was iffy.

Soundwave saved him in battle once and it was the hottest thing Starscream had ever seen.

Shockwave has an oral kink. He likes to use and watch others use their mouths.

Soundwave is a very cuddly partner so he and Starscream often snuggle tight in berth, Shockwave just lays below them.

Shockwave enjoys efficiency so sometimes while addressing Megatron on a call he'll entertain Starscream under the console ;3

Soundwave can sit for hours just watching his two nerds in the lab, even when they aren't doing anything spicy with each other.

Starscream loves being on top of Shockwave because his chest is a lovely perch to lean on while he rides him.

Next up Dreadwing & Skyquake x Predaking x Starscream (pretending he never betrayed either of them and if Skyquake lived)

Dreadwing and Skyquake both wanted Starscream so they both unintentionally cornered the poor bastard and told them, very cordially (and LOUDLY), that they wanted to court him.

Starscream didn't know what to do because the brothers treated him POLITELY and respectfully. They gave him gifts and went on walks after shifts, taking turns so as not to flank him at all times. He was sure this was some attemptb on his life. He was sure of it.

Starscream grew to respect and appreciate their calm demeanor, though Dreadwing is more the calm one then Skyquake.

Predaking also wanted to approach the seeker after they'd been "training" before he discovered his root mode, but he approached the seeker's current suitors to challenge then.

Skyquake and Dreadwing entertained his challenge but admitted they only wanted Starscream's happiness. They offered to let the dragon approach Starscream

Starscream thought he was being pawned off at first and didn't speak to any of them for a month before they all, once again, cornered him to talk.

The idea of having 3 partners was not that hard of a concept for Starscream, he was just surprised the idea came from two larger seekers and a dragon (really the dragon thing was the most crazy part of it)

Starscream is extremely vocal in berth and Skyquake appreciates it, talking dirty with him and encouraging it.

Dreadwing tries to keep himself quiet so he can hear all the little sounds his jet makes before he starts getting loud.

Predaking gets riled up when the other is vocal and often finds himself snarling and roaring with him.

Skyquake and Dreadwing will couple with Starscream at the same time but very carefully so as not to hurt him, but Starscream doesn't mind. It takes a long time to try and convince them that it's okay to be a little rough with him but it isn't their thing.

Predaking, on the other hand, gladly obliges Starscream's request. All three usually join in the aftercare at least.

Starscream is happiest when they all pile together in a massive nest of a berth on the rare chance that they all have the same time off to rest.

[elindae-writes]

More miscellaneous Seeker headcanons

Seekers recharge in their alt-modes. Some even taxi around in their asleep. Back when the Decepticon’s Seeker fleet was still whole they would all sleep together in a big room in the Nemesis while in their alt-modes. This was reminiscent of the way they’d all recharge back in Vos. In their towers they’d have several large sleeping rooms and the specific way they were organized varied from tower to tower. When Seekers recharge they breathe out air so if you go into a room with a dozen sleeping ones it’s like going into a wind tunnel. When one Seeker begins to taxi in their sleep the others subconsciously follow suit, so Seekers are used to waking up in unfamiliar locations and just being a-ok with that. The confused grounders who tried to recharge in the nearby quarters occasionally snuck a peak into the Seeker recharge quarters just to see what the weird nose was and then walked in on ten Seekers slowly driving around in circles in their sleep.

When Starscream became the last living Seeker of the fleet aboard the Nemesis he got his own smaller quarters and left behind the communal sleeping room because it was just too empty.

When Seekers recharge in their root mode they always sleep on their stomach because they want their wings to face up into the air so that they can detect their surroundings better via the airflow.

Seekers instinctively grab onto things in their sleep because Seekerlings tend to wander around and leave the sides of their caretakers, so the caretakers evolved to instinctively just reach out and grab whatever is moving near them in their sleep. Starscream loathes recharging next to other mechs because this programming of his results in him instinctively grabbing onto and clinging to the closest living thing next to him. When Starscream was in the medbay he once reached over and grabbed onto Knock Out in his sleep and now KO repeatedly mentions it non-stop.

“Do you remember when you woke up while clinging onto me and my totally sweet finish?”

“Do you want my talons to cling onto your spark chamber?”

Seekers can sense magnetic poles the same way birds can and are therefore very good at navigation. It’s a common joke amongst non-Seekers that Seekers are utterly obsessed with nerding out over maps. Starscream gets annoyed whenever he hears this stereotype being talked about, but then always remembers how he can still remember all of the hundreds of main flightpaths through Vos and then gets silent.

They prefer to fly at night because Seekers are very good at using the stars to orientate themselves the same way little bugs can. They’re attracted to bright lights and Seekers who are not very attentive while flying will sometimes find themselves in strange bright places. Back on Vos you’d look up and see like five young and confused Seekers perched on top of a blinking billboard and none of them would really be aware of how they got there. That was Starscream’s main method of making friends.

Starscream has this bad habit himself and has found himself perched onto quite a few human billboards. This has resulted in all sorts of weird cryptid pictures of him and his glowing red optics next to a billboard surfacing on the internet. There are blurry and dark pictures of him confusedly standing beside those weird giant billboards in the middle of nowhere in the desert that advertise “the THING” so now everybody is convinced that he’s the thing. Arcee growls at those billboards whenever she sees them and says something along the lines of, “Oh yeah, Starscream sure is something.”

Everybody on the internet also thinks he’s a mothman.

They’re not that far off from the truth.

He has like a dozen different cryptid internet alter-egos that he isn’t even of aware of due to being a tad careless about humans seeing him.

Seekers built their towers in Vos higher and higher and higher and so on, but this had the unfortunate side effect of making the lower portions of the towers get even darker and darker, and starless darkness is something Seekers utterly loathe. They artificially lit these lower layers with fake stars and giant HUD screens that projected fake skies. These were actually pretty realistic, but still fake and everybody was obsessed with that sweet authentic sky, so this was where the poorer Seekers and criminals were. Any Seeker at all who was going through bad times or was in any kind of bad living condition was said to be “living under a fake sky.”

When Megatron began to get all riled up he tried to recruit the Seekers, especially the bitter ones he knew to be living in the depths of Vos, so he had Sounders hack into their fake skies so he could project his ugly mug onto them and make grandiose speeches. Starscream saw quite a few of them back then when he was on the run from the Enforcers for “murdering” Skyfire. He’d groan dramatically everytime Megatron appeared. I headcanon Megatron as being as tech savvy as a really old person, so whenever he’d make these speeches he’d hold the camera under his chin in the most unflattering way possible.

Soundwave would then move one of his cables into view to readjust the camera, but then Megatron would just get angry and yell at him off-screen. He’d forget to mute himself so several thousand Seekers would just stare out their windows in confusion while listening to Megatron rant about some archivist named Orion Pax. Megatron insists that the Seekers didn’t join him because they were “fools.” Soundwave knows they did not join partly because Megan would begin frothing on-camera while projecting his faceplate onto the Seekerling nurseries.

“Soundwave, how do I fullscreen the video feed?”

“YOUR FACEPLATE IS BEING PROJECTED ONTO A ONE HUNDRED STORY APARTMENT COMPLEX”

“Soundwave, you ignorant slut! It is not fullscreened and I need to demonstrate my fullscreen power--”

Seekers reacted to Megatron’s sudden and intrusive fake sky speech sessions the same way us humans react when political ads come on and freaking RUIN Jeopardy I just want to enjoy the Video Daily Double without ominous pictures of people in suits covering the entire screen I just want to see Trebek slaggit

You seemed to enjoy the last post and I have like a hundred more of these random headcanons stored in my head so I’ll just keep posting them if that’s what people want. Unburied chapter 22 is almost done!!

[tsuki-here]

So I finally decided to write a tfp oneshot; I didn't really want to write anything multi-chaptered since I probably wouldn't have time to finish it, sooo I did this instead. Might try writing some other oneshots in the future, if I find the time. I haven't been able to write anything in months, so it probably ain't that good haha

Title: Hamaka

Characters: Starscream and Knock Out

Word count: 1,696

Pairings: Mentioned Breakdown/Knock Out, somewhat implied Starscream/Knock Out if you wanna interpret it as more than friendship

Summary: It was unfortunate when the minutes blurred into hours, the words came to a halt, and Starscream felt he had perhaps overstayed his welcome. He stood and made his way toward the door, mumbling about having something to do, only glancing back when he heard the other bot call his name.

---------

He strode down the hall of the Nemesis with a forced air of purpose; body tensed, wings up, head held high, and face set in a grim, focused scowl. Not a single other soul was present in the hallway, so it seemed to all be a show for no one, but he knew better. There were cameras everywhere.

Turning the corner, he finally reached his destination and activated the panel to open the massive door in front of him, not daring to look back and see the trail of blue spatters that marked his path through the ship.

The instant the door slid shut behind him, Starscream let the facade drop. Wings fell, shoulders slumped, and an exhausted sigh escape him as he trudged to the examination table near the back wall of the room, ignoring the red optics that were already assessing his injuries from across the room.

This was one of the few places without a camera; Knock Out had made a big scene about 'doctor-patient confidentiality' when Soundwave had tried to install one cycles ago. After enough ranting and dramatics, Megatron finally caved just to shut him up. Soundwave installed one just outside the door instead, and even if the medic wasn't happy about it, he didn't push his luck on getting it removed. The walls were soundproof anyways; only when the door opened was the spyware liable to pick anything up.

With a quiet hiss, Starscream perched on the edge of the table as Knock Out gravitated to his side. He mumbled something inaudible about the Autobots, and the doctor gave a vague nod of understanding and pretended to believe him.

A few metallic clicks sounded somewhere just out of his peripherals as Knock Out's hand turned into a welding torch and he got started on mending any of the wounds that were bleeding. "You really ended up in bad shape."

He hadn't expected much more than that; consoling wasn't something the other bot excelled at. In fact, Starscream was surprised the response was so mild. No sarcasm or mockery that he was accustomed to when visiting the medbay, no prying for information with insensitive questions. That didn't mean he wouldn't make use of his own snarkiness. "Is that really your professional opinion, doctor?"

There wasn't an immediate response, and a period of silence elapsed as Knock Out continued his work, patching each and every open wound and split-open metal until no more energon trickled down to collect in the puddle on the floor. Starscream managed to get through the painful part of the procedure by gritting his teeth and waiting it out, until finally the blowtorch disappeared with another series of clicks. He closed his eyes and breathed a sigh of relief as the sound of receding footsteps reached his audio receptors.

He realized he must have zoned out for a moment; next thing he knew, the red bot was at his side again, this time with a rotary buffer, and was nudging his arm away from his side with a gentle hand to get better access to the scuffed and dented armor there. Starscream complied to the wordless instruction, lifting his limb out of the way as the buffer spun to life with a soft whirring noise and began it's work smoothing out any unsightly marks.

In the span of a few minutes, the Seeker felt himself relaxing and his wings returning to their normal positioning rather than hanging miserably as if made of lead. This was one of the few things that could be looked forward to these days, it seemed, even if the relief was only temporary.

"So, are you going to tell me what really happened?" Knock Out finally spoke up again, moving on to work on his right wing and lightly tilting it up. "Must have been pretty serious if Megatron left you in this condition."

Starscream rolled his optics. There it was. Knock Out could never get through one of these sessions without saying something insensitive. His words were always barbed and laced with poison, in such a stark contrast to his handiwork, which was always carried out with such care. It made him wonder if it was some window into the doctor's life - pre-war life - anyways. Despite how much Knock Out talked, he never really said much. At least, nothing that mattered. All of the cycles he'd known the medic, and he knew nothing of his life before the war or why he'd joined the Decepticons, anything even remotely personal. And on top of that, he was near impossible to read. He knew how to guard his emotions, and he had no obvious body language to go off of, such as how he had his wings that often reflected his inner emotional state. Had he been kinder, back then? Or was he reading into something that held no meaning at all? "It's none of your business."

Knock Out merely hummed in acknowledgement and kept any further questions on the matter to himself, continuing his work with slow, methodical movements of the buffer. "If you say so."

Despite being quite the extrovert, Knock Out usually preferred to provide a type of company that was almost feline in nature. Simply being in the same room, talking about nothing, fixing up any blemishes- Actions doing all the communication because words just didn't fit his style of serious self-expression.

He wasn't really ready for the procedure to be over, and the internal sense of dread came bubbling back up nearly instantly when Knock Out stepped back and the buffer came to a halt. Being fixed meant he had to leave, had to return to difficult decisions and scrambling to stay alive. Had to risk ending up right back in the medbay if something went wrong, and that was if he was lucky.

Normally he would stand immediately, test his limbs and joints to make a show of ensuring the medic did his job correctly before excusing himself typically without any thanks. This time, Starscream stayed where he was as Knock Out returned his tool to its rightful place, hoping not to be asked why he lingered. The medbay was the one place he could relax, and expect a degree of comfort and understanding; it was safe.

[But no, that wasn't quite right, because the room had nothing to do with it, the room was nothing. The medbay wasn't safe, Knock Out was safe. It's such an important distinction, one Starscream still struggled to fully comprehend because trust was usually deadly in his experience.]

And safety was so rare and precious here, more valuable than any gem or riches one could ever hope to fathom.

It was no wonder, then, that the troops were drawn to the medbay for similar reasons as he was, all like moths to a dazzling light. The vehicons were all nobodies, created simply for the purpose of being bodies to throw at the enemy. They were mostly neglected and treated as tools, or at best, just ignored and deemed irrelevant, so a doctor's visit was as good as it got. Even if Knock Out didn't particularly care about the soldiers, he still treated them as living beings when he tended to their injuries, not to mention they got to be the center of his attention for those brief few minutes.

In fact, Starscream had an inkling that some of the vehicons' rather common injuries from the energon mines weren't quite as accidental as they claimed. He had no doubt at least a few of them had a little crush on the doctor and just wanted an excuse to visit the medbay to get their paint jobs fixed. He couldn't say he blamed them; Knock Out glowed like a flame on a starless night.

After a few moments passed, he felt the medic's gaze on him once again, and braced himself to make some excuse of why he hadn't left yet, though the question never came. Rather, Knock Out stated, "At least the war can't drag on for too much longer, with the limited resources left. We'll be able to return to Cybertron soon, I imagine."

The change in topic was welcome, anything to distract from the reason he was there to begin with, not to mention to focus on a more hopeful prospect.

[A part of him recognized Knock Out chose the topic with a level of subtle deliberation, specifically to get his mind in a better place. The automobile was never too concerned with the fate of Cybertron; he'd grown too fond of Earth over the years, Primus knows why.]

The conversation meandered from there, drifting like a raft lost at sea between topics and non-topics, words that hardly even made sense and were just there to fill the void.

It was unfortunate when the minutes blurred into hours, the words came to a halt, and Starscream felt he had perhaps overstayed his welcome. He stood and made his way toward the door, mumbling about having something to do, only glancing back when he heard the other bot call his name.

"Be careful," was all Knock Out had to say, but there was a tone of concern and hurt in his expression that Starscream wasn't sure he'd ever heard or seen before.

[Because Breakdown was dead and the doctor was still grieving for his conjunx, in his own internalized way, and there wasn't much left he had to care about now.]

He didn't know what to say or what he even could say to ease the other's worry, and just turned away. The medbay doors slid shut behind him, and the sudden, oppressive isolation was like a physical blow that required a moment to recover from before he started down the dark hallway, this time without any limp or biting pain. His path of blood splotches still remained, the glow of the energon having dulled with the passage of time, like an eerie breadcrumb trail beckoning to him. He followed, vaguely aware that it was luring him back into the vicious cycle of war and violence he'd grown accustomed to over the millions of years, and with every step, further away from home.

[needs-to-stop-looking-at-valves]

The thought of Tfp Megatron always wanting to Frag is hilarious to me. Could you maybe write something Nsfw with him and his con s/o?

I gotchu fam. Imma make them a bratty seeker, because that’s what Megs is REALLY into. Like seriously, imma bout to write Megatron’s DREAMS here.

You glanced over your box of treats, carefully dragging a servo across the wrapping underneath. These treats were made of the finest energon, and Steves would only be able to see them in their wildest fantasies. You plucked a pink looking one from its wrapping, and took a bite. You winced, and threw them to the side. You told that oaf you did NOT like this kind of energon goodie the last time he got you something, and now look at this mess. You shut the box, and handed it to some random bot.

“You, throw this away. They’re terrible.”

The Steve looked at the box in confusion, seeing that it was mostly full.

“Uhm? There’s nothing wrong with these, sir. Not to mention you only had-”

You silenced him with a smack to the face. Your wings pointed down in anger, and you were two seconds away from ripping him open a new one.

“Did I ASK for your input? No. Get rid of them. And tell that tin canned moron to come over here, I’m officially in an awful mood.”

You huffed, watching as the Steve obeyed you. You picked up your jewelry box, thumbing for a few pretty things. Truth be told, you were rather content with your life. But enough was never enough. Not for you. You slipped a few rings on your servos, as well as a necklace or two. Maybe an ankle bracelet, just to be a tease. You got up from your berth (it was technically Megatron’s, but what was his, was yours), and stood in front of your mirror. If looks could kill. Speaking of killing, you felt rage in your spark the second you heard that voice.

“Darling? I was told you needed me. It must be urgent, I told you I was busy-”

“Oh BUSY.”

He gave you that look, daring you to step into his personal space. You growled, and jabbed your servo into his chest.

“Busy as ever. Too busy to remember that I said NO PINK ENERGON TREATS!”

You stomped your pede, and you yelled right at him. His dentae bared at you, and he tried to keep a composed smile.

“Darling. I can’t remember every single little-”

“Oh? I can remember you have a processor! And that's tiny as SHIT!”

You stretched out your wings as you barked at him, and you knew you had him. The second he saw some pretty wings, he was falling over himself. Moron. You put your hands on your hips.

“You better make me happy in the next five seconds, or we are not fragging for a MONTH!!”

You knew for Megatron, that was a sentence worse than death. Before you opened your mouth to start counting, he interrupted you.

“Ah! But, I do have a new, pretty thing for you!”

“...I’m listening.”

From his subspace, he pulled out a small box. You took it from him, and watched your reflection dance against the gems. Magnet earrings. You plucked them from their casing, inspecting them. You didn't have a pair of these yet.

“Are these real emeralds?”

“Of course! Darling, much like my love for you, there isn't a fake thing to be seen.”

He bowed down low to you, and you huffed. After you clipped them on and gave yourself a good look over, you nodded.

“Well, good job. You un did your fuck up.”

“Nothing pleases you, does it, you fucking kite?”

You turned your helm at him, gasping. How dare he call you something like that? AS if your wings were that fat. You scowled, and you swore your wings were vibrating in anger.

“You take that back, you moronic, ugly crack addict.”

He was up in your face now, practically seething. Most would be trembling in fear, but not you. Because you knew this big moron was getting off to this.

“Oh, as if YOU’RE any better! Sitting at your perch and eating your weight in energon goodies like royalty. You understand how expensive-”

“Oh I’m sorry, I didn't know I bonded with a FUCKING peasant!”

You two were so furious, so absolutely angry, you could've been frothing at the mouth. His forehead was pressed against yours, and anyone else would've been an energon splatter against the wall.

“Primus, you’re beautiful.”

“I know, and you’re a fucking bottom.”

You kicked him in his shin, causing him to go down to one knee. The rest of the events were a blurr, but they somehow ended up with you holding this mech by a collar and least; vibrating toy stuffed deep inside of him, and body littered in scratches. He was pathetic. Six overloads, and he still wanted more. He was drooling, casting his gaze upon you.

“Please! One more! One more!”

“You said ‘one more’ three overloads ago.”

“Please! I’ll be good! I won’t forget about your treats! I promise! PLEASE do it! PLEASE!”

You’d think he was begging for mercy on the battlefield. But no. The mighty Megatron was groveling, begging to get his rocks off for a seventh time. You rolled your optics, before raising your heel, and stomping right on his spike. He screamed in a cocktail of agony and ecstasy, overloading promptly onto your pede. You scoffed, and turned off the toy, making the warlord go limp. He was slumped over, optics glazed, condensation dripping down his frame. He was a mess. 

“Ew. I JUST got that waxed. Clean.”

He obeyed immediately, taking your pede and licking off all of his overload. Once you seemed satisfied, he smiled up at you. What a lovesick fool.

“I love you. So much.”

“Yes yes, I love you too.”

So you’re flapping wings more or less spoke for you. You thought you were done here, when he cleared his intake.

“You have such pretty wings, my darling. Could...could I get a wingjob, maybe?”

“...God you’re a mega asshole.”

[grayseekerswritinglife]

Tricks & Treats 5/5

Chapter Five: The Gold-Sweats

“Fly?” Hook broke stride and gave Starscream an incredulous look. “I don’t think you understand the seriousness of the situation. Skywarp is lucky he can walk, let alone fly.”

“I realize that,” Starscream said irritably, falling in step beside the Decepticons’ chief medic as he resumed walking down a corridor of the Victory’s crew deck. “I’m just looking for an ETA. That’s all.”

After their escape, they had sneaked Skywarp back onto the Victory without drawing undue attention to themselves. Hook had agreed to let Skywarp recover in his quarters rather than the medbay, which had been helpful, though it was only a matter of time before Megatron started asking questions. Eventually, the old bucket-head was going to decide that he simply had to have an airstrike. When that happened, it would be Starscream’s neck on the line if all Seekers weren’t ready to scramble.

“Look,” Hook said, in the clipped tones of a medic nearing the limits of his patience. “The best I can offer is that Skywarp will be ready to fly once ninety percent of the gold has left his system. But that could take up to two weeks.”

“Two weeks?” Starscream let out a string of curses, which Hook duly ignored. They were nearing the door of the quarters which Skywarp and Thundercracker shared. Hook politely raised his fist to knock, but Starscream shoved past him and barged in. He regretted doing so almost immediately.

Skywarp was sitting in a shallow tray positioned on the floor between Skywarp’s own berth and the one he typically shared with Thundercracker. It was easy to see why. He was literally dripping gold. Liquid metal was leaking from his joints, his vents, his transformation seams, and—it seemed—from every other orifice. It was even flowing, like tears, from the corners of his optics. Gold had pooled at the bottom of the tray, leaving him sitting in a puddle of what was, effectively, his own sweat.

“Ugh.” Starscream crinkled his nasal assembly. “How revolting!”

“You don’t know the half of it,” Thundercracker said with a shake of his head. He was kneeling behind Skywarp, using a rag to clean his gold-streaked wings. This appeared to be an impossible task. Every time he cleared some gold away, more came pouring out to replace it.

“That’s very good,” Hook said in approval. “If you keep his transformation seams as clear as possible, the gold will escape from his system much more easily.”

“But I don’t want it to,” Skywarp complained.

“Too bad,” Starscream snapped. “I expect you back in the air within the week.” Hook shot him a glare, which he duly ignored.

“How are you feeling?” Hook asked, crouching to run a medical scanner over Skywarp’s frame.

Skywarp shrugged. “Okay, I guess. What did you put in the gold, though? It tastes terrible now.”

“Nothing,” Hook replied, his gaze never leaving the scanner. “What you’re experiencing is a common side-effect of gold-poisoning. You might even say it’s your body’s way of protecting you from your own questionable habits.”

“Gold tastes bad to you now?” Starscream asked from the doorway. He didn’t want to get any closer to that puddle of sweat than he absolutely had to.

Skywarp nodded unhappily. “It looks sooo tasty, but when I try to drink it—”

“Drink it? It’s your sweat.”

“So? It’s better than letting it go to waste.”

“Trust me, Warp; it is disgusting,” Thundercracker put in.

“It probably won’t taste bad forever,” Hook assured him. “Once your system has returned to a state of balance, your taste-receptors will probably do the same.”

“But in the meantime,” Starscream said, “I guess I can safely leave this by your bedside, without having to worry about you putting on any additional weight.” He drew a small bag of golden ore—the very bag he’d originally confiscated from Skywarp—from his subspace, and tossed it on Skywarp’s bunk.

“Now you give it back,” Skywarp said with a pout, though he eyed the bag with naked avarice, as if he was thinking of trying it anyway.

“Yeah, I’ll be taking care of that,” Thundercracker said, whisking the bag into his subspace. “I’ll make sure he gets some when he’s ready. And that he doesn’t overindulge,” he added, giving Skywarp a stern look.

Skywarp folded his arms over his gold-slick chest, glaring. Mostly at Starscream. “What are you even doing here?”

“Can’t a Trineleader check up on his Trinemates?”

“Watch out,” Thundercracker warned. “We might start thinking you care.”

“Don’t be absurd. I was merely ensuring that Megatron does not hear of our little... adventure,” Starscream retorted. “Which means making sure the two of you remain alive and intact.”

“Whatever you say, Screamer.”

“I just have one question,” Starscream said, fixing his gaze on Skywarp. “I thought the Autobots searched your subspace.”

“They did.”

"How did you keep them from finding your pranking supplies?”

Starscream only asked because Skywarp’s pranks had saved their afts. After they’d gotten past Sludge, Skywarp had used one of his smoke-bombs to distract the two other Dinobots guarding the detention area. After that, most of the Autobots had been in such a frenzy to deactivate the sprinkler system that they hadn’t even noticed the escaping prisoners. Those who had noticed had swiftly fallen prey to Starscream’s null-ray. Or to the reverberations of Thundercracker’s sonic booms, which were deafening at close range. Or—in the notable case of Powerglide—to one of Skywarp’s fake snakes. Which had proved highly effective as a tripping hazard.

“Oh,” Skywarp said with a smile. “They did find them.”

“But they let you keep it all?”

“Noooot exactly.” Skywarp leaned back against Thundercracker, coating his chest in golden slime. Thundercracker made a face, but draped his arms around Skywarp anyway. Skywarp grinned. “The Autobots were all so distracted by the gold that I was able to slide a few things back into my subspace.”

“And naturally you chose the exploding pumpkins,” Thundercracker said. “Priorities and all.”

“Hey, ‘tis the season.” Skywarp smirked. “But you know the part we’re not talkin’ about? The electro-magnetized part.”

“The what?” Hook asked.

“Oh, nothin'. Just the way Starscream busted into the detention holding area and kicked the door open like a ninja and grabbed his null-ray straight from the jaws of one of those Dinobots—”

“Yes, well,” Starscream interrupted. “We simply do what we must, don’t we?”

“Yeaaaaah.” Skywarp playfully flicked gold in his direction. “It’s got nothin’ to do with that picture you keep in your lab.”

“Picture?” Hook looked nonplussed.

“Schematic,” Starscream corrected. “Of the Ark. It’s how I knew where the Autobots were keeping the null-ray. Obviously.” He turned for the door, but Skywarp called after him.

“Know what the best part of all this is?”

“I shudder to ask.”

“The two of you guys comin’ to my rescue,” Skywarp said, glancing warmly between Starscream and Thundercracker. “Nice to see you gettin’ along for once.”

Starscream scowled at them both, and hastily made his exit. He went straight to his lab. If anything good could be said to have come of this, he was at least getting some uninterrupted lab-time. Finally.

“Now,” he said, sinking down at his workstation. “Where was I?” He called up the data-set he’d been analyzing when Thundercracker had invaded, and stared at it for a while. Equations swirled through his mind like wisps of smoke, but his gaze kept drifting to the holocube. Finally, he picked it up and gazed at the two figures pictured within. A silver-and-red Seeker perched on the shoulder of a mech so huge that his wings blocked the stars. Starscream pressed his lips together, sighed, and opened a comm channel. A very old one. So ancient that no one, even Soundwave, would have been able to break its encryption.

“You idiot,” he began.

A soft laugh greeted his remark. “Are you all safely away?”

“Yes, but you took a stupid risk.”

“Perhaps. Or, perhaps, I prevented a retaliatory attack by the Decepticons. I imagine that Megatron would have wanted the three of you back, eventually.”

“If only to prevent us from revealing secrets,” Starscream reluctantly agreed.

“So perhaps it could be said that I took care of a dicey situation in a way that caused the least amount of harm.”

“Which doesn’t make you any less of an idiot.”

“Possibly not.” A pause. “How’s Skywarp doing?”

“You’re changing the subject.”

“Yes.”

“Whatever.” Starscream shrugged. Then, remembering Skyfire couldn’t see him, added, “He’ll live.”

“Good. And I trust he’s learned his lesson about stealing gold?”

Starscream snorted.

“Thought as much.” Skyfire chuckled. “Thanks for not hurting anyone.”

“Apart from Powerglide,” Starscream pointed out.

“I think it was only his pride.”

“We would have, if we’d needed to. Hurt people.”

“I understand. But you didn’t.”

Silence fell between them. Not an uncomfortable silence; just companionable.

“So it’s Halloween tonight,” Starscream finally said. “I don’t suppose you’re free?”

“Why? Are you going to scare me?”

“I could.” Starscream thought for a moment, then rattled off a set of coordinates.

A beat of hesitation. “Isn’t that where you got captured?”

“You’ll like it,” Starscream promised. It wasn’t as if the Aerialbots would be there standing guard, and besides, the pocket valley was private and rather beautiful. Plus, tonight was a full moon. He wanted to see Skyfire by the side of that spring, wet and gleaming in the moonlight. “Bring all your tricks,” he said, “and I’ll bring treats.”

~~~~~~~

This was written for @darkstarofchaos​ for the @transform-or-treat​ Halloween gift exchange. There are five chapters of it in all, and I will be posting a chapter a day until Halloween! Many, many thanks to @justawayninja or being my awesome beta. Your suggestions helped me get the story to the next level.

[brandwhorestarscream]

Some time ago I saw some art on twitter that portrayed Transformers as robotic centaurs. I thought it was pretty neat! Made me think of a fantasy creatures/Transformers fusions.

... but clearly didn't make me think too much as I realise when I write this I hadn't thought about their alt-modes. Whatever.

But I was thinking of Seekers resembling harpies, biped but with digitigrade legs. Lovely big talons, like a proper bird of prey. Possibly more articulated wings that can still lock into proper shape??

Grounders would generally be centaurs. But grounders that specialise in stealth could possibly have more lamia-like bodies??

All I know is that Megatron should be a centaur with the equivalent of a draft horse body. I'm just imagining Starscream perched on his back.

Sorry for this incoherent rambling 😅

You're fiiine lol incoherent ramblings are usually entertaining