#Meg Haston

[meaningfall]

— From Paperweight by Meg Haston

[bookcoversonly]

Title: Paperweight | Author: Meg Haston | Publisher: HarperTeen (2015)

[tcplnyteens]

Paperweight by Meg Haston

Content Warning for discussion of eating disorders (not pro)

This book follows a seventeen year old girl named Stevie as she goes through a standard eating disorder recovery center. Through the book we slowly learn more about what happened before she arrived at the treatment center... and why Stevie is going to die in twenty seven days. She has no plans of recovering at first, the pressures of the world are weighing too heavily on her and the anniversary of her brothers death looms on the horizon, just twenty seven days away.

I enjoyed this book. Unlike Wintergirls by Laurie Halse Anderson, this book depicts eating disorders in a non-glamorized light while still being realistic. Granted, Bulimia Nervosa is often less glamorized in comparison to Anorexia nervosa, but both are often romanticized in media.

I remember growing mildly frustrated at the pacing and the vagueness of why she was so upset, but looking back it was definitely worth it. It gave a sense of empathy, where the reader couldn't know what was going on because Stevie refused to confess. While Stevie had fully accepted her guilt in what happened the reader wasn't privy to this knowledge for a while, similar to how the medical professionals didn't know about it either.

From an abused child to a self-blaming teen, Stevie's development is riddled with negativity. The development of her disordered habits as a child evolving into a full blown eating disorder which steadily consumes her mind is realistically portrayed amazingly. The author drew from her own experience with an eating disorder and from her studies as a registered counselor. That gave her much needed nuance and care when it came to handling the sensitive topics discussed.

All in all, this was a great book. I would recommend it for those who have an interest in stories surrounding mental health/illness.

[wishbowl]

Paper Weight

M. HASTON

About This story is about a 17 year old girl, stephenie who strictly goes by stevie and we are plopped into her life as she is entering her first day of in treatment at an eating disorder retreat in a faraway desert town. I feel like perhaps my main points from the book may be wildly different from the main points that a normal eating person would be able to gather from this but a major point of contention was her diagnoses, which was the reason for many tantrums. Through the book we see her grow [figuratively and literally lol] and she gets less bitchy and she doesn't end up killing herself on her brother’s death day.

Review This book is less triggering and more cathartic in a way as it somewhat materialises the internal monologue you have towards food, and your body and how your fucked up mind perceives other people. But there's no numbers ex It's a little difficult to get into the main character, especially in the beginning since she's a total bitch to everyone including herself and although the story is told entirely in her perceptive you find throughout the book you sympathise and even have these moments where youre proud of her becoming. Could it be more typical, seventeen year old girl, major life event, starving, failing to stick to, sticks her fingers down her throat. And honestly if it werent such a quick read i wouldve probably had more of a distaste for it. What i did like was that the ending wasn’t the after of her being years into recovery and all cured and wrapped up in a bow. I liked the ending which was much like the rest of the book where nothing really happens.

[alyssalikestoreadbooks]

Paperweight - Meg Haston

"Seventeen-year-old Stevie is trapped. In her life. In her body. And now in an eating-disorder treatment center on the dusty outskirts of the New Mexico desert.

Life in the center is regimented and intrusive, a nightmare come true. Nurses and therapists watch Stevie at meal time, accompany her to the bathroom, and challenge her to eat the foods she’s worked so hard to avoid.

Her dad has signed her up for sixty days of treatment. But what no one knows is that Stevie doesn’t plan to stay that long. There are only twenty-seven days until the anniversary of her brother Josh’s death—the death she caused. And if Stevie gets her way, there are only twenty-seven days until she, too, will end her life.

Paperweight follows seventeen-year-old Stevie’s journey as she struggles not only with a life-threatening eating disorder, but with the question of whether she can ever find absolution for the mistakes of her past…and whether she truly deserves to."

Read Date - May 2024

Length - 288 pages

Genre - Mental Health, Contemporary, Realistic Fiction

Rating - 7/10

Stars - ★★★★☆

Notes - I think this is a great depiction of different levels of loss, grief, and trauma. It unpacks it all through the story of a girl with an eating disorder staying in a treatment center in new mexico, and it switched back and forth between present day and the past through flashbacks. I think the flashback scene are VERY well done, and they remind me of my own flashbacks. They’re accurately described where its a memory, a very STRONG memory-- but a memory nonetheless. They use this format to show off how Stevie got to where she is now with her trauma. I personally am a big fan of the resolution of this book as well, where the therapy starts working. I’d honestly be interested in a sequel to this about Stevie’s life in the center as she’s accepting treatment. I loved this book. 

[bestofmultiverse]

Between the pages || 4

Aubrey plaza x fem!reader

"It’s hard to save people from themselves. But if they’re willing to try, it’s worth the risk.”

- Paperweight by Meg Haston

A/N : this part talks about mental health, i don't know if its on triggering level but it was important for me to let yall know.

Got inspired by my trip to the ER today because of anxiety attack that left me feeling like i was literally dying. Im okay, conveniently had a therapy session as well afterwards so had a pretty rough day- but pushing trough it 🤍

I love you guys hope you will like this one x

1 • 2 • 3 • 5

When Aubrey stormed into the ER, she wasn’t sure what she was more furious about: the fact that her girlfriend hadn’t told her she was there or the casually infuriating way she explained it when she finally did.

“I didn’t want to bother you,” her girlfriend had said with a weak shrug, as if chest pain and difficulty breathing were minor inconveniences she could brush off.

“Didn’t want to bother me?” Aubrey had echoed, disbelief flaring in her voice.

The younger woman, seated in one of those awful plastic chairs, simply nodded, her eyes heavy with exhaustion. “It’s not the first time,” she added lightly.

That had nearly sent Aubrey over the edge, but then her anger had crumbled the moment she took in her girlfriend’s slumped posture, the way her hands trembled slightly in her lap. The fight in her drained away, replaced by a deep, aching worry.

Without a word, Aubrey knelt in front of her and wrapped her arms around her tightly. Her girlfriend stiffened for a moment before her shoulders sagged, and tears, born of frustration and weariness, spilled from her tired brown eyes.

“You scared the hell out of me,” Aubrey murmured against her temple, her voice breaking.

“I’m sorry,” came the hoarse reply.

“What did the doctor say?” Aubrey asked after a beat.

“Nothing yet. It’s been two hours since they checked me, so I guess that’s a good sign,” her girlfriend said, trying for humor, but the weak smile didn’t reach her eyes.

Aubrey frowned and brushed a stray strand of hair from her girlfriend’s face. “What made you come in today?”

Her girlfriend hesitated, looking down at her hands. “A coworker noticed I was struggling and told my supervisor. They basically forced me to come.”

Aubrey’s heart clenched at the thought of her being too stubborn—or scared—to seek help on her own. “I’m sorry that happened, baby.”

“It’s not your fault,” her girlfriend said softly, shaking her head.

Aubrey pressed a kiss to her forehead. “Still. I wish you’d told me sooner.”

“I didn’t want to worry you,” she said, her voice barely above a whisper.

Aubrey sighed, her thumb tracing comforting circles over her girlfriend’s hand. “I’m going to talk to the nurse and see what’s going on.”

Her girlfriend grabbed her wrist, her grip surprisingly firm. “Please don’t make a scene. They’re doing their best.”

“I won’t, I promise,” Aubrey said with a small smile. “But I’m not just going to sit here while you suffer.”

She stood and approached the front desk, her patience already worn thin. “Excuse me,” she said, keeping her tone calm but firm. “My girlfriend’s been waiting for two hours with chest pain and trouble breathing. Is there any way to get an update?”

The nurse didn’t even glance up. “It takes time,” she said dismissively.

“I understand that,” Aubrey replied, clenching her jaw. “But is there any way to know how much time?”

Before the nurse could respond, a doctor appeared in the doorway, clipboard in hand. “Y/N?” she called out.

Relief washed over Aubrey as she hurried back to her girlfriend. “Come on,” she said gently, helping her to her feet.

They followed the doctor into an exam room, and Aubrey stayed close, her hand never leaving her girlfriend’s.

“After running several tests, we didn’t find anything concerning,” the doctor began, offering a reassuring smile. “Your heart and lungs are healthy, and your bloodwork came back normal.”

Aubrey’s girlfriend nodded slowly, her expression conflicted.

“So what’s causing this?” Aubrey asked, her tone carefully measured.

The doctor hesitated before answering. “It seems to be psychological—likely a panic attack.”

Aubrey’s girlfriend let out a bitter laugh. “Figures.”

“It’s more common than you think,” the doctor said gently. “There’s nothing physically wrong with you, which is good news. But I’d recommend following up with a therapist to explore potential triggers and coping strategies.”

“Right,” her girlfriend muttered as she stood, grabbing her bag. “So, I’m crazy. Got it.”

“You’re not crazy,” Aubrey said firmly, standing as well and pulling her into a hug. She held her close, one hand cradling the back of her head as her girlfriend let out a shaky breath against her shoulder.

“Thank you, doctor,” Aubrey said softly before leading her girlfriend out of the hospital.

The drive home was quiet, the radio turned off at her girlfriend’s request. When they reached Aubrey’s apartment—a place that had gradually become their shared home—they settled on the couch, the silence stretching between them.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Aubrey asked after a while. “No pressure, but… I’m here.”

Her girlfriend pulled her knees to her chest, resting her chin on them. “It’s just… stuff. Work’s been rough, and… other things too.”

“Other things?” Aubrey prompted gently.

Her girlfriend hesitated. “It started about five months ago.”

Aubrey froze. Five months ago—the same time the media had started dissecting their relationship, plastering their faces across magazines and social media.

Her girlfriend must have noticed the look on her face because she quickly added, “This isn’t your fault, Aubrey. Please don’t think that.”

Aubrey shook her head. “I should’ve protected you from all of that.”

“You couldn’t have. I chose this. I chose you,” her girlfriend said, her voice trembling. “And I’d choose you again. Every time.”

Aubrey pulled her into her arms, kissing her temple. “I’d choose you too. Always.” She paused, stroking her girlfriend’s hair. “But I think we need help—someone who can help us make sense of this.”

Her girlfriend looked up at her, confused.

“I’m talking about therapy,” Aubrey said gently. “For you, if you want it. And maybe for us. Together.”

Her girlfriend frowned. “You think we need couples therapy?”

“I think it’s worth trying,” Aubrey said honestly. “You were scared to tell me what you’ve been going through, and I can’t stop blaming myself for what you’ve been feeling. I don’t want either of us to carry that alone.”

Her girlfriend sighed, her shoulders slumping. “I’ll think about it,” she said quietly.

“That’s all I’m asking,” Aubrey said, kissing her hand.

After a moment, her girlfriend stood. “I need a bath. I feel gross.”

“Want company?” Aubrey offered with a small smile.

Her girlfriend nodded. “Yeah. I don’t want to be alone.”

Aubrey followed her into the bathroom, and they sank into the warm, bubble-filled tub together, with a book of y/n's choice as their worries temporarily melting away in the comfort of each other’s arms.

[mil3nk]

KSIĄŻKI O ZABURZENIACH ODŻYWIANIA:

„TELL ME LIES - CAROLA LOVARING”

„WHAT IT TAKES TO LOSE - ANNA TAYLOR”

„THE ART OF STRAVING - SAM J MILLER”

„SAD PERFECT - STEPHANIE ELLIOT”

„WHAT I LOST - ALEXANDRA BALLARD”

„SILVER CROWN - JULIE JOHNSON”

„CRESCENT CITY - SARAH J MAAS”

„BOYFRIEND MATERIAL - ALEX IS HALL”

„HEARTSTOPPER - ALICE OSMAN”

„SHAPE OF LOVE - MARINA NEUMEIER”

„MASSIVE - JULIA BELL”

„SOMEONE TO LOVE - MELLISA DE LA CRUZ”

„THE YEAR I DIDNT EAT - SAMUEL PALLEN”

„BE•LIEV•A•REX•IC - J J JOHNSON”

„BUTTER - ERIN JADE LANGE”

„PAPERWEIGHT - MEG HASTON”

„NIE POLICZALNE - KAREN GREGORY”

[sk1nn1blogger]

Hello peeps I’m a bookseller and I recently found a lot of 4n4 books I wanted to share

1. Elena Vanishing - Elena Dunkle

2. The art of starving - Sam J. Miller

3. Sad perfect - Stephanie Elliot

4. Paper weight - Meg Haston

5. Butter - Erin jade Lange

6. Winter girls - Laurie Halse Anderson

7. An apple a day - Emma wolf

8. The ministry of thin - Emma wolf

9. What I lost - Alexandra Ballard

10. Wasted - marya hornbacher

11. Diary of an eating disorder - Chelsea smith

12. Unbearable lightness- Portia de Rossi

13. Size zero - Victoire dauxerre

[weightlessisthenewblack]

Ik wintergirls blew up a little while ago on here, but Paperweight by Meg Haston is another really good 3d book, takes place in a recovery center. Just finished it the other night and I was crying towards the end of it there.

Ofc it 100% can be super triggering so like. If you decide to read it be careful of what your limits and triggers are, especially in terms of 5u1c1d3 and sh, and 3ds ofc

[may202020]

If you want a good and triggering book, read Paperweight by Meg Haston

[meaningfall]

— From Paperweight by Meg Haston

[karenlacorte]

Check out this listing I just added to my Poshmark closet: Bundle of My Little Pony Books.

[mica-1989]

¨Tal vez entonces entendería que en la vida nunca es todo blanco y negro. Que la mayoría de nosotros ha aprendido a vivir entre grises.¨

El final de nuestra historia - Meg Haston.

[fiction-quotes]

This is one thing I can appreciate about the desert: It is without pretense. There are few perfumed flowers, or lush green leaves, or other signs of life or beauty. The environment is harsh; the life that has survived is stripped of excess.

  —  Paperweight (Meg Haston)

[first--lines]

Twenty-seven days to freedom, and I am caged. Suspended in a boxy aluminium prison with gray cloth seats and the synthetic stench of piña colada swinging from the rearview.

  —  Paperweight (Meg Haston)

[iambookotter]

Paperweight by Meg Haston – Book Review

5/5

Triggers: Eating disorders, self-harm, suicidal ideation, anxiety

‘The girl in the mirror was too much and not enough.’

‘The reason a single caloric unit takes on such importance, the reason the pound becomes our currency of worth.’

This book hit so close to home that I had to take long breaks in between chapters so that I could get to the end without falling apart. Here is the dish: I have struggled with an eating disorder for most of my late teens and early twenties. I am still grappling with a distorted self-image. Therefore, this book was extremely triggering for me.

Stevie’s journey is tough to read because the author breaks down her thought processes, letting us in to see everything that is going on in her head. As is often the case with people working through their EDs, her mind is preoccupied with the crippling fear and guilt that accompanies the thought of taking even a single bite of food. She is also overcome by guilt and pain over her brother’s death, which is revealed very early in the book.

There were so many passages in the book that were hard-hitting in their portrayal of the toll EDs take on their sufferers. The way they perceive themselves, the lack of self-worth, and the extent to which a number on the scale can dictate one’s life. As someone who is sometimes still unable to help seeing the words ‘worthless’ and ‘not enough’ in place of the number of kilos on the scale, reading Stevie’s and the other girls’ journeys made a world of difference. It was a brutal and raw representation of EDs and I am so thankful for the representation. Especially because it is not always as simple as “oh, just eat, it won’t kill you” and “it’s all in your head”.

Okay, now for the more objective part of the review. Stevie was an unlikeable character from the beginning, but this is understandable given that we are experiencing the story through her eyes while she is suffering from loss, grief, pain, suicidal thoughts, and an ED. I appreciated the faithful depiction, which made the relationships she grudgingly developed with her therapist and the other girls in the centre that much more satisfying. Stevie’s journey towards healing progresses organically as well, with the narrative jumping between her ongoing time in the centre and her past which is delivered in the form of memories crashing into her mind unbidden during harder moments.

All in all, Paperweight is an excellent representation of mental health and EDs. Very triggering, especially for those who have been in similar straits, but definitely worthwhile. Highly recommended!