#Maybe I'm just too demanding
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There is no better song to describe Johnny Vincent's situation than "When Doves Cry" by Prince
#How can you just leave me standing?#Alone in a world that's so cold? (so cold)#Maybe I'm just too demanding#Maybe I'm just like my father#Too Bold#Maybe you're just like my mother#She's never satisfied (she's never satisfied)#Why do we Scream at each other?#This what it sounds like#When Doves Cry#johnny vincent#lola lombardi#bully scholarship edition#bully canis canem edit#canis canem edit#cce#bully cce#bully se#bully rockstar#bully game#rockstargames#rockstar games#Spotify
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new genre of LO comedy unlocked: watch the LO wiki editors fight for their lives to justify entire articles for characters who only showed up once and then disappeared forever
"well, themis is pregnant so that must mean SOMEONE knocked her up, right??? put that in relationships, that counts"
"charon's abilities... ferryman... boat... he ferries a boat! therefore he must be very good at ferrying boats! write that down!"
"now hold on, let's not completely discount the idea of artemis' pet wolf having some kind of relationship with someone later on, i'm sure rachel will answer that soon"
#i'm not trying to be a dick to the fans but the wiki really shows how much pointless filler people took WAY too seriously as “deep lore”#this isn't even really a criticism or anything i just think it's funny LOL#and if anything it goes to show how so many characters just did not need to be in the story#esp characters like Themis#like you introduced a character into the story just to tell the audience “she's not gonna be in the story” ???#why even bother at that point LMAO#idk tho were people demanding Themis during the trial arc ?? like maybe that was rachel just trying to get people off her back?? 😆#it's still silly though because literally nothing would have happened or changed if she didn't bother#lo critical#anti lore olympus#lore olympus critical
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Found a cool color palette. Might finish it later. (Probably not.)
#star wars#star wars the clone wars#star wars rex#star wars the bad batch#Glitched half an hour on his face for no reason#just cause I couldn't figure a skin color#like I come from impressionism#you know this small art movement#where half of the Chinese artists I follow borrows their wonderful color palette#Color palettes who are perfect to draw noice anime boys#but (we can't lie) where everyone tend to draw only fair skinned characters#So I'm bugged trying to draw realistic people with that#would probably help if I forced myself to do studies ya know#instead of looking at gensh1n art#skill issue as people say#maybe is should draw on a bigger file too#like not draw face with realistic feature on a 300x300 px square XD#But again this drawing was me procrastinating on another one#I hate finishing illu#I just wanna plan/doodle and layout#for others#my jobs of heart are storyboard or color key artist#background paint or compositing hell no#clean animation? kill me#I had a burn out last time I touched a graph editor#too bad that's the most demanded and entry level jobs#v_v#tips for people who want to enter animation industry#don't be like me#finish stuff
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Reading journal 3 again is a reminder that... Well Ford is kinda an asshole towards Fiddleford. It's not just Stan. Like he's so focused on himself and his project and his ambition that anyone/thing else blurs out (him disregarding Fiddleford's nervousness around the gremloblin because he wants to sketch it, and when it goes sideways, him talking about the safety of the project parts BEFORE how Fiddleford was doing in his journal, multiple times. Priorities much?) and he's demeaning towards Fiddleford's own project (which ends up being wayyyy more important then Ford's discoveries)... Like damn Fiddleford, u left ur wife and young son for this guy?
#gravity falls#ford pines#stanford pines#fiddleford mcgucket#fiddleford hadron mcgucket#ford squared#like... i get where reading the journal so its more of Ford unfiltered thoughts but it REALLY shows his priorities#and yeah I'm nor saying there wasnt good things in their relationship but Ford still is very much by this point extremely self-absorbed#and it SHOWS and its not... it bot very pretty. like we joke about Bill fumbling Ford and how great Ford is but like ..#compared to McGucket who earnestly cared Ford... was extremely self-absorbed and selfish. and like McGucket definitely#began to help Ford step out of his self-absorption and solely being driven by his ambition but in the end it ended terrribly#literally McGucket feeling so unsafe in the relationship and where he was that he made the memory gun and then USED IT UNCONSENTED on Ford#because he couldnt destroy it and Ford demanded him too... like yikes#anyways theyre all a fucking delight to chew on#this is not supposed to come off as ford squares disliking this is me going those two arent as wholesome as u might think when they were#younger. or maybe since im not a lurker in that part of the fandom i just have a poor conception of what its like compared to like. billford#like you can REALLY see what Bill likes in Ford#hugin rambles#hugin rambles gf
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Hey Digital Extremes, why are you limiting our play style to only one romance? Thought this game was about player choice. Let us choose to have the gameplay option of polyamory! 💕
There should also be a platonic New Years night option too that involves no romance for those not comfortable with it!
#Amir Eleanor Aoi & Lettie are all looking real nice 😻 I need to go to the höllvania central mall more often awooga#I’m super disappointed that you’re asking us to pick only one in a game where we have the freedom of choice at our finger tips#signed a polyamorous tenno who wants some casual polyamory rep in this game plz thanks#no but seriously Digital Extremes I’m begging hands & knees here give us polyam rep NOW#I’m demanding this; monogamy makes me uncomfortable give us the option to choose multiple NOW please#the heteronormativity of only kissing one person on New Years is very disappointing & I mean that genuinely#also they are all flirting with each other anyway as is in the relay (aside from the siblings of course)#so why can’t we flirt with multiple of them too?? it just feels like a waste of an interesting idea kinda also make a aromantic path too#I’m aware Arthur Nightingale & Eleanor are siblings but let us CHOOSE multiple partners to kiss for New Years dang it!#Quincy is also super hot so like having us choose only one feels very limiting & yes I'm being for real asking for this#there is time to improve this feature DE please im being so fr right now#maybe hanging out with the 2 nightingale siblings on new years night can be the aromantic option; im just saying! 💜#new years night with a nonmonogamy & aromantic option please & thank you; not asking for much here; I'm really not#warframe 1999#warframe spoilers#warframe#tennocon 2024#tennocon#the hex#the hex syndicate
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Often I just cannot comprehend the lack of curiosity so many people have towards the rest of the world... Different cultures, people, languages, food, architecture, stories. To me this is what life is about, this is the most awe inspiring.
#I'm watching videos of people giving a tour around Jordan cities and I'm just completely taken by it#Occasionally I forget it but I've felt this way since i was like 13#there's just so much to learn about#we're all the same but all so different you know what i mean#langblr#random tho so an international club started at my school a couple semesters ago#and I went a couple times the first semester but the social demand became too much on top of school (yno know. the autism)#so i haven't been back#but next semester i have a much lighter schedule... maybe I'll try again
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unusual face post where i don't bring up caname marriage. all of their gangstalia childhood photos have been shown! i've been very captivated by their answers
the question is virtually the same for each of them with different wordings. here lord and owner have a goal for their future. between a distinguished admirable grown up and a welcoming hotel runner. meanwhile hero and parrain's answer are like. so vague. [(i?) can be anything] and [(be?) me] makes me laugh. what are these kids even saying? such blatant different personality dynamics. i actually don't have any coherent words i just point at a difference and go wowwww coool(keys jingling in front of me). but really. how sweet!!! the different similar answers
#kill ame#gangstalia#i've heard lots of interpretation on ame's answer being#kind of petulant. i don't know if thats the right word but. mostly because he interrupted the interviewer asking#and because of the “what do you want me to say?” right before it#dismissive towards adults#and maybe to the thought of adulthood here? he can be anything he wants~#some interps see it as him being annoyed. a little fed up. sure i'll play by you... grown-up's demands...#i'm open to whatever goes honestly... hero is kind of an enigma right now. i love him dearly#refusal to give a “proper” answer to an interview could probably be seen as rude.(i don't think interviewers would mind much tho)#so hero and parrain here is a point of interest for me#and on another point!!! frus has captivated me before and now especially so with them both having to do with immortality interacting with#-humans who they care for who died#i don't angst over davie too much because it feels more like just one example. but that's frus's commonalityyyy (^_^)#and today it pops up again! their answers feel almost romantic to me. maybe less so for hero because(like i said before)...#but it's like a musing thought. i can be anything. i'd be me. what funny kids#the face family dynamic isn't a thing here but it's funny to think about with this. unexpected on who feels similar to who
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Hi I'm thinking about writing a h2g2 and gravity falls crossover fic. I saw your post awhile ago and I was wondering if you had any idea on how the two fords would interact.
Oooh this is a really good idea!
Hm, I haven't properly watched Gravity Falls in a while (I KNOW IM SORRY), but comparing their personalities from what i know they have a couple similarities and differences.
For first interactions I'm not entirely sure how or where, neither of them are naturally social but if someone were to start a conversation it would be Prefect, and once they realize they're both named Ford P. they'd hit off perfectly.
I think they'd love to go out for a small drink and talk about their outlooks on life, about space, their own traumas and relationships, about their research and studies with their respective books (Pines to the Journals, and Prefect to the Guide), and about their plans for future. This interaction could also be a lot funnier depending on the tone you wanted to take.
Ooooh they could also rant about their annoying family members (Zaphod and Stan)
They would also engage in an epic game of Dungeons & More Dungeons no doubt
#if you ever end up writing this fic please feel free to send me it when you're ready i would love to see it :)#okay okay im not sure if you were only planning for the fords to interact but a full crossover is immediately interesting me now#hmm maybe the HoG malfuctions with the improbability drive on and it crashes into the mystery shack immediately i think that would be silly#i'm really interested in bill and arthur interactions now as well. they barely have any similarities but it sounds really funny#oh wait they could relate to their world's being destroyed...even though bill's the one who destroyed his own world#i think the pines twins would immediately lose their marbles over ford and zaphod being *real life* aliens#ford prefect would give dipper his copy of the Guide that man would give a 6 year old a laser blaster this is tame for him lol#mabel would be super insane over the fact that zaphod has 2 heads and 3 arms and was also a president and zaphod would. not care#(i head canon he dislikes children)#i think a mabel and marvin interaction would be cool too#uber depressed and uber excited#i also need zaphod and stan relations yeahhhhh 2 greedy often self-absorbed criminals probably wanted across all 4 dimensions#i want to see trillian and arthur summon bill cipher by complete accident because they were bored and they are simply just Normal Guys#neither of them would be surprised to see a floating yellow triangle with a tophat. they've seen too much at this point this would be norma#someone needs to restrain me i've made too many tags#ANYWHO happy writing!! im sorry if i sound demanding you get to choose whatever you would like for your story i just got a little silly#i hope i answered your question enough#h2g2#the hitchhiker's guide to the galaxy#ford prefect#gravity falls#ford pines#stanford pines#ask#tumblr asks#lucifers gluttony#lucifers inferno
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you go to a lesbian blog and find it says women only!! no men allowed!!! and go oh! excuse me, um, what about other lesbians? plenty of lesbians are genderqueer... and they go well, okay, go fuck yourself tim chop off your sweaty dick and stop calling yourself a lesbian. you do not have a dick, actually. you think about that fact often, even though it does you no good. you do not tell this person that.
you go to another lesbian blog and it says women only and you try again, and this time they change it to wlw + nblw only (non-men who love non-men :D). and you'll say hey i appreciate that but gender's not really that cut and dry for a lot of people. someone could be both a man and nonbinary, for instance. i just worry that you're looking at nonbinary as a generic third gender, or an extension of womanhood. i mean yeah you include nblw in your tags but all your posts are about pussy-havers exclusively. what's with that? and they say go fuck yourself you pervy man pretending to be a lesbian. you tried to sneak in but i won't let you.
so you go to a lesbian blog with a dozen or so posts about queer people needing to be more weird about it and you sigh in relief. but you still see the men dni. that's odd. hoping for the best, you say hey! i know you mean well but please maybe don't put men dni at the end of the lovely posts on your lesbian blog bc some lesbians are men. and they'll be like ok!! well you're allowed ;) and you say no that's not. no. some men are lesbians not just me. you think about your own dicklessness and wonder if that's why you were given entry. and you add that even if male lesbians are allowed, there's no indication of that. how would anyone know without asking? and they're like ohh gotcha gotcha well men dni + this is for sapphics only!! and you'll be like ok well that treats the concepts of men and sapphics as mutually exclusive identities and i just told you that's not true and you agreed with me so.. i don't think that solves our problem. and they're like. ok. fine. men dni but genderfluid and multigender people are allowed! and you're like no see that's. that's still the same thing.. you're saying the same thing just with different words. if you don't want men to interact but you're fine with multigender/genderfluid/etc ppl interacting then you either don't see them as Real Men (because they don't reach a standard of Full Manhood) or Complete Men (because they're only Part-Time Men), both of which suggest that they are, in some way, not men or less-than men, which is invalidating and defeats the point of the exception in the first place (accommodation) OR that you don't really mean the dni which is confusing and inconsistent and makes guydykes feel weird and uncomfortable and excluded from the lesbian space you're trying to cultivate. and they're like um. ok. so. cishet men dni? and you're like well i think that makes more sense, but what if someone identifies as both a cishet man and a sapphic? again, if we're trying to accommodate the genderfucky populace then that has to be a possibility that is considered. and they say god you people are never happy. what do you want me to do? what am i supposed to say to keep the right men out? and you pause. you empathize with the need for a space free from dudes trying to fuck you straight and feminine. dudes who watch lesbian porn and joke about what they'd do if they were allowed into girls locker rooms. who look at you like a piece of meat, and like someone who looks at women like pieces of meat in the same way he does. you get it. you know. you want a space where you can be sapphic, too. that's why you came to these blogs in the first place. you brace yourself and you say well i don't know that there are "right men" to keep out. i don't know that there's any single label that would accomplish whatever it is you're trying to accomplish. you could go for "sapphics only" or "queers only" and i think that might be the closest thing to what you want, but it's never going to be perfect. creating any exclusive space is going to shut out people you didn't account for, and the broader the label, the more people will be shut out that you didn't want to shut out. and what about people who don't know if they're allowed? what of questioning transbians, where are they supposed to go? and, frankly, i think i might rather my dykey posts get read and appreciated by a gay guy who sees me as a man than a woman who only sees me as a sacred womb, pure from male perversions or violence or whatever. i think community might just be more complex than a dni can handle. and they look at you and say i don't want to not have a dni. i think you're too permissive. you can't just "what about" or microlabel your way into everything. go fuck yourself, i bet you're not even a lesbian anyway. go find a real problem to get mad about.
you go to a lesbian blog. you ignore the men dni because you know you probably don't even count to them. or maybe you do count and, out of respect for your manhood, they'd shun you accordingly. you try to feel okay about that. you scroll past dozens of posts about mediocre men and gagging at straight friends' boyfriends and how gross and undeserving men are of the beautiful women they couple up with and how all women should be gay so they can get treated right and and and and and. you finally find a post about curling into someone you love and feeling at peace and try to lose yourself in it. you know that feeling is what unites you, what makes you belong. you try to focus on it. you think about carding your hands through a butch's hair or lacing fingers with a femme and feeling warm and loved and more yourself than you ever have before. like this is who you're meant to be. you read about lesboys and butch boytoys and genderfucky dykes and big hairy deep-voiced wonderful women (like you want to be someday, like you wish you could make yourself) and you try to ignore the men dni underneath each and every post. and you daydream about meeting someone kind and earnest at a lesbian bar even though you don't think any such bars exist within three states of you and you can't drink and don't want to drink because you need to be in control of yourself at all times so you don't fuck up like you're always about to and here in the nonexistent lesbian bar you feel wanted and safe and in good company. you picture your ideal, happiest self. it is a mistake. ideal-you has a goatee. not the mascara one you smear on and call drag even though you know it's not drag, not really, the beard you call drag because you think everyone would look at you sadly if you told them it was just to pretend you had something out of your reach. a beard that's soft and that you grew and that cannot be smudged away if you get too comfortable with it. the dream shatters. your people pull away from you, their scoffs mixing with the mind-numbing gay girl bedroom pop you learned to settle for just to have something that almost resembled you, they all pull away and turn their backs and do not look at you. you're too close to being a man now, even though you're the same amount of man as before. and they know you're not supposed to interact with men, not as you would with dykes, at least. and it sours. it's all your imagination, all in your head, but it sours.
you sigh. you think about how small you are. how short, how narrow, how feeble. how your voice pitches up when you talk to strangers because it's easier to speak quietly when it carries more, and because you're nervous. because it's a chore to talk, like everything is. you think about testosterone. you think about how your family would look at you, the questions they would ask, your answers they would only pretend to accept. the uncomfortable glances and whispered questions they'd try to hide from you. you think about how small you are, and how small you will always be. how you don't know of a way to fix it, but even if there was one, no one would want you anymore. you'd be the only one thinking it made you a cooler dyke. you think about how you don't even want a T-voice all the time, how you'll never be able to switch it at will, because you don't know how and can't bring yourself to figure it out. you think about how your throat closes around every hint of your own attraction. how wanting is perverse, how wanting is invasive, how wanting is embarrassing and too vulnerable so it must stay anonymous, as an online witness, and how you can barely manage to form or maintain friendships because your brain makes you pull away, always spinning out and struggling to recover from the simplest of interactions. how they'll all leave you and you won't chase after them at all and how that will hurt them. how stuck you get. how it looks like nothing's holding you back, how that frustrates everyone who thought you were going to be more than you were. the people you love who understand except when it comes to being ghosted, being shut out. how you don't want to hurt them. how you can't tell them that because you're stuck. how you turn to stone when touched, how you never reach out, how you lose your speech and can't look at people, how your autism is fun and sexy until it becomes real and you never see them anymore, how much you longed for someone who knew everything without you having to explain, and who loved you anyway. how unreasonable you know that is to expect of anyone. you think about that not-even-real lesbian bar. you think about how you still can't drive. how you can't leave your home on your own, without dragging somebody into helping you. how you can't leave your body. how you can't leave your manhood behind.
you think about finding another lesbian blog and ignoring everything. about skimming it for the parts you can juice some meaning from. the parts men ignore and don't understand, and how typical of you it is to do so. or the parts where you're not welcome and you should accept that, because it's for lesbians only. how you are a lesbian anyway. how you're meant to choose lesbian or man, how each is a betrayal of some kind to yourself or your people, your family, your lovely strangers, your rare friendly acquaintances. about the parts that tell you you're not wanted, that you're ugly and lazy and gross and insert yourself everywhere without even asking. about the parts that tell you you are hated, and how lesbians are above it all by rejecting men. how lesbians are each blessed miracles. about the parts that say you should be ashamed of being whatever twisted confused freak you are, of everything, of looking and wanting or not looking or not wanting, of picking and choosing instead of taking it all in with a smile. after all, shouldn't you take it? or is your ego too fragile, as men's so often are? aren't you tired? good. we're not here for your consumption. and we sure as hell don't want your company or "community" or whatever. didn't you read the sign? no boys allowed. and if you want to come in you have to make up your mind. as if you haven't told them the only answer you have. you're both. you're both.
you know you broke the rule by interacting.
but it gets lonely sometimes. you wonder if they know.
#before i maybe get yelled at:#1) no i do not think ppl are evil for having men dnis no i do not think these are all equal transgressions even#though there is an overlap that should be examined that i think is based in a degree of lesbian separatism + exclusionism#2) yes there are lesbian blogs and people that are cool about genderfucky people. i'm not talking about them#3) this is a stylized vent post about trying to find lesbian content on tumblr that isn't like this. all these dnis/rules are ones i have#encountered. no i do not literally tell these people to change their dnis to suit me. the conversations are symbolic and ideological in#nature. if i find a blog with men dni i generally go somewhere else. it's about emotions. it's about my feelings on that it's not literally#about dming someone demanding they change things. it's not about demanding that You change things or else you're a bad person.#4) it is about the conflicts and hypocrisy and inconsistency of strict and exclusive sexuality labels persisting in gender-diverse spaces#and how it affects me as a lesbian who is a man who is a woman who is fucking whatever else. and yes it is about transphobia too.#5) it's about how lesbians feel the need to exclude men and how i think efforts to do so fail and hurt ppl and are often misguided#tht i think also comes up in like. bi lesbian/mspec lesbian/gaybian discourse. i'm not any of those myself but it seems like there's overla#6) if this post seems whiny and sad and insecure that's because it probably is. i have a right to be all of those things.#7) no i do not think all lesbians are man-hating assholes. i am a lesbian. i love lesbians. i love dykes and most of them are fantastic ppl#i just think the general bullshit of the world leads to this defensive thing that ends up hurting others in our community y'know?#8) i get that my perspective/experience is a bit unusual and many lovely ppl haven't considered it. that's part of why i'm sharing this#nyarla dni#<- sorry man it's too vulnerable. gonna keep this one to the internet-only folks#adding this wayy later but a crucial part of the experience i Almost talked about it this but never explicitly did was that like#the measures ppl take to 'defend against men' are often deeply transmisogynistic as well. obviously#and when i see that it hurts me too. not that it hits me the same way when strangers assume im a trans woman and hate me for it#but it doesn't feel good to see transphobia at all. i focused on how that relates to other kinds of transphobia#namely transandrophobia here but like. it's all connected. lesbain separatism + exclusionism relies on both and they aren't always#distinct experiences. ime. anyway trans ppl i love all of you forever#i just thought me writing “*turns to the camera* and trans women exp this too.' wouldve been too much even for this post#i figured the audience would like. know that. and so far it hasn't been an issue. i have not been yelled at thanks guys 🫶
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Please note that I'm not speaking for all writers when I say this, but if you're thinking of commenting on a fic you really liked, please do not put, "Part 2?????????????" or any of the derivatives.
You'll never know it if you're not a writer, but it takes a lot of work to finish something as little as 3,000 words. Majority of the longer fics I've posted on here took a minimum of eight months to finish. So to put in all that work only for people to ask me to put in more work is exhausting to read.
I write primarily for myself. I choose to share it because I think others may enjoy it too. Being consistently asked for a part 2 on oneshot fics makes me feel like I'm a fast food server, like it's my job to take your orders and serve the public. My writing, to you, is not an art to appreciate, but a commodity to fill your stomach.
If you're going to leave a comment on anyone's fic, say that you liked it. If you're feeling wordy, tell the author the things you enjoyed about it or what it made you think or feel. Trust me, that is far more flattering than demanding a sequel without anything else. And for my works, if asking for a sequel is the only thing you have to say, I'd really rather you just say nothing at all.
#personal#genshin x reader#writing#i'm so tempted to add more tags to this#add the alhaitham tag bc that one is so busy lmao#but no i'll be good#i just....#how hard is it to say 'wow i loved this!'#'this is so cute omg'#but no your first reaction is to put a demand?#how does that not sound rude to you?#would you ever comment on an artist's work:#'can you add more details to this picture?'#'can you expand the canvas 1000 pixels to the right so you can add more to this painting?'#a picture is a picture#a oneshot is a oneshot#if you really need to ask be like 'i love this so much! are you planning on continuing it?'#that's a much nicer way to ask. i have absolutely no beef with that#but damn at least compliment the writing first#don't just immediately jump to what you can get out of the writer#i wasn't going to complain abt this again after i bitched abt it on my main but then my friend made a post too#and it made me like 'lol maybe i should again too'
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(genderly) chill as hell if i was only ever glimpsed / detected like this
#Shrouded In A Rectangle neither sleeves nor an open front to be besieged with? yes#just doing whatever else like doesn't matter. tee cargo shorts which is my best guess rn of my ideal outfit. + sandals Absolutely#unfortunately my hair could never do that. somehow neither am i yet like forties fifties? have i not been at this for eons?#i Can be like uh let's just nobody talk to me i'm busy pensively perceiving truths that you don't ever actually wanna hear about#just the other day it was like hey....a [way Having To Talk could be a difficulty / problem] was under my nose in this lifelong pattern#certainly noticing the Verbal Exchange Demand heaped upon burnout as like [delay delay delay struggle weariness stress]#but also who knows like spent plenty of time just probably indeed Not having to have such exchanges while burned out. not noting them#anyway like this isn't even [dysphoric Ideal Outfit until i could [whatever supposed even more ideal than that gender euphoria]]#though shoutout to that but like nah get shrouded anyway. the only [how do i look] im motivated to consider is: when it's a costume#when it's just me it's like. i guess whatever pants and a comfortable enough tee. need glasses. hair's w/e so cut quite short ig#might accessorize w/things that are fun to me like hey yeah yknow i might want a calculator watch#[yea as a kid it was like :( im actively appreciating the animals supposedly Gross or Bad] if i had hated little friends Sure yaay#if i had disorienting light effects like a pelagic creature. but you don't even need that. like hey i'm nd in real life. i got it#chat i'm in the walls too bestie lmao. if only my bigfoot pose reference Step was this good#tl;dr long rephrasing of my being like; now the gender slay....#& nodding & Noting when [worksheet exercise: what's your gender euphoria look?] is like shrug idk. but this is serving maximally to me; so#going Chat how can i up my uncanny stats. looking up ''isn't it like Uncanny knowledge e.g. so like why not....canny''#but i think the un canny is the Uncanniness Accuser's perspective. not of My ken. your literal weird one maybe#so again apt to be like jk i'm just autistic & shit; i got it....horror shit challenge impossible: Don't have sm typical mundane#[disability moment] as like Unsettling danger/malice cues. challenge impossible; again#subverted here like as [horror holding hands touching foreheads w/comedy] w/o Rescinding just casual disabled behavior/qualities#just remembered like three witches weird sisters etc macbeth. weird uncanny soothsaying gendering. word#anyway i should be shrouded (made no any connection whenever i put the blanket now over my head & shoulders in place min ago)#perhaps the real Ideal Look insight: i do not have any way i wish to be observed by people. secret passages / removed room anytime
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I think one of the main reasons I don't want to be famous is the lack of privacy. Like people suddenly feel entitled to your life. The explosion of influencers and online public figures has really warped our sense of respect and boundaries. I don't need to know my favourite internet person's daily routine or their what their private instagram full of people they've known since elementary school follow.
Like yeah, the person that sits in their dark house, with no lights and never opens the blinds is a little creepy but, the person standing at their window, yelling at them to open them, is terrifying.
"If you have done nothing to wrong, then there's nothing to hide."
And what authority do you have to look?
#shitpost#shitposting#this isn't me defending people who have done awful actions in the past and therefore reflect their future#it like people asking iron mouse for photos of her walker and her saying no because she uses it publicly#actually just asking or demanding face reveals from people counts too#like everyone thinks everyone wants to be an influencer and have legions of fans swarming them#like when they tried to dox Corpse#or when they find KPOP idols just trying to enjoy a meal#maybe its just because I'm old and listened TOO hard on the DARE program but I think needing access to public figures#especially those that aren't A-list celebrities that can afford on call body guards#is the kind of entitlement we desperately need addressed#let people be people and enjoy life
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Hey not to make a political post but does it ever feel like we can just never win and the suffering will be forever and we're always going to have to fight with moments of peace being fleeting and not worth looking forward to
#behind the tent#neg#current events#the worst man alive got shot and lived#if he DOES die he will be martyred . we will be considered a violent threat . the right will revolt#if he DOESNT die he will martyr himself as a survivor . we will be branded as violent and worth stamping out . we're going to be killed#moments of celebration do not last#two innocent people died as a result#and we couldnt even fucking kill trump immediately#and joe biden aint much better!!!#and halfway across the globe innocent families are being ripped apart in the name of an ethnostate and by god Im not letting myself give up-#-hope for them . Im not allowed to feel hopeless for them .#but fuck if the knowledge in my mind every waking day doesnt add to it#and neither of our politicians care!!! and of course the entire fucking world ends up dictated by the whims of the US anyways so the fact#they dont care is crucially fucking important!!#And my right to live and exist in this country will probably be wiped away entirely in a couple of years when I just barely got to taste it#there's a chance I could be hatecrimed next time I walk out the door#And maybe its the ahedonia since childhood speaking too but I'm starting to not see the point !!!!! what is the point !!!!#the fact there ARE people who care about me is the only fucking reason I'm not gonna end it all tomorrow! I swear to god!#And at this point I am waiting for this to finally fucking affect me personally so I can have an excuse to fucking feel that way!#I feel so fucking selfish for being so suicidal when I've been one of the lucky ones but god its not gonna get better is it?#everyone encourages radicalization and change . demands it . begs for it . but it hasnt happened! it will Never happen!#my only god damn choice is to let it lead to despair!#suicidal ideation cw#God I wish I had access to hard drugs
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just imo, but a.rcane's s2 act ii was... weak. and below average for the series' standards (usually quite high)
#unpopular opinion ik. (yet another one...)#but tl;dr: the pacing was absurdly fast and it didn't give the characters and their inner/external conflict time to breath#and develop accordingly. it feels like it flash forwarded over some important dynamics' conflicts and just. focused on#found family (my beloathed...) cutey vibes and ~let's make the audience cry!!~ scenes#instead of actual gravitas and demanding (but satisfying) moral/relationship conflicts#it was WAY too easy. i'm waiting for act iii to get some of the issues right but tbh i have no real expectations anymore#and maybe my standards are too high. maybe i'm used to VERY good shit and i'm too exacting even when i'm just a casual fan#but my brother is a big a.rcane fan and we basically have the same grievances. actually we're (as always) on the same wavelength of thought#they crammed an entire season in like. only 3 eps#and that's imo a fact sorry#val speaks#txt
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okay, I need to get this out of my head and maybe ask for an opinion if you'd also feel slighted or feel I was being dismissive and/or incompetent at work? (probably will delete this later)
I had a cat today in need of catheterisation (clogged urethra) and I did what I could for over an hour but I wasn't able to place the catheter inside. (I get "clogged cats" once every few months at most because I have a very small practice and so far I never encountered this much trouble.) I work alone so the owner was there holding the patient for all my attempts. I thought this cat might actually need surgery and since I don't do surgery I sent the owner away with directions for where to go.
I get a notification two hours later that the owner review bombed me on google and also invited two friends to do it as well (three one-star reviews at the same time so it's obvious)
she didn't pay much, only for the materials used and sedation
she thought I was being incompetent but I only wanted to spare this cat renal failure, maybe she thought I didn't care? as in I did nothing for you, now pay and off you go? I mean it might've looked that way, like I just gave up. Should I've tried for longer? Be honest. I literally don't know how certain things can be viewed by others sometimes.
from the context i figured the other vet did place the catheter so I'm at least happy the cat should be ok
#i would seriously prefer if she called me personally and screamed at me and demanded her money back#(which I would gladly give if she was so dissatisfied)#there is no communication with owners at all anymore when they have criticism towards you they just smear you in front of others I guess#it's funny i tell myself I don't really care about google reviews#but I care enough to make this post I guess#sorry guys I'm kind of down because of this#i think I've made a mistake today maybe I gave up too quickly
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sum 41 show tomorrow and london on wednesday and glass animals show on thursday i am going to have so many regrets and SO much fun mwah
#*mine#mona rambles#who needs sleep right#also gonna be in london till sunday but i think imma just take friday to like. chill#work's been so demanding too and i have ANOTHER show this month and the christmas party and just#why is november so goddamn busy like pls#everyone go write a novel and maybe you'll calm down#i'm not really bitching it's all really fun stuff#like i love being an adult without children you can just spend an inordinate amount of money on concerts and travelling 😌
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