#MY only conclusion is that he realizes he’s looking at his relationship with Shannon through rose tinted glasses

[drunkeddiediaz]

Like seriously where do we go from here boys (gn)? How are they going to wrap it up without damaging Chris and Eddie’s relationship? I trust them not to fuck it up but at this point idk. And where do we go from here regarding Eddie’s personal life? Another unknown woman (man)? Single forever? Cat dad Eddie? what?

EYE know the only logical conclusion is queer Eddie and Buddie.

[wanderingwomanwondering]

Thoughts on The Buddie Talk from 502

Other folks have looked at this conversation, but I wanted to get on my bullshit about it too. LOL.

So imho this whole conversation is about love and heart, specifically Eddie’s but with Buck’s heart added in. Line by line analysis and commentary. Let the BS begin. Here we go…

Buck: Hey are you sleeping, or just pretending?

Day and night/light and dark are strong themes throughout the episode. @benka79 did a meta on this theme. I think that by extension, awake vs asleep is meaningful in this scene. In matters of the heart, Eddie is trying to sleep or turn a blind eye, doing what he thinks is best for Chris rather than himself. This is exactly what Carla warned him against. But he knows. He knows that Carla is right but he’s ignoring her and trying to ignore Buck. He’s only pretending to be in the dark about his heart and his desires, at least to a degree.

Eddie: I was actually trying to until you interrupted.

Enter Buck, shaking shit up. Interrupting Eddie’s well-intentioned lie. Eddie knows there’s more than meets the eye and Buck is forcing him to open his eyes, wake up and see what’s really going on and reckon with himself and his true desires.

Buck: I’m exhausted. Uh, how are you feeling?

This line has been rattling around in my brain for what feels like a thousand years. Buck is NOT asleep, he’s not able to turn a blind eye. And being the only one willing to look directly at matters of the heart is wearing him out. Dude’s exhausted! He SEES that something is up with Eddie’s heart and he wants Eddie to tell him all about it.

Eddie: Hot. I’m sweating out of places I didn’t know I could.

During the blackout, AC isn’t working so everyone is sweating. Buck even has a thin layer of sweat in the scene. Sweating from the heat is normal and completely reasonable, but is that what’s being invoked here? We know that sweating is also a symptom of health issues (panic and heart problems not the least among them, and definitely symbolically relevant here). Eddie looks like he’s sweating for normal reasons but in the next line Buck questions that.

Buck: No uh like a cold sweat though, right? Uh, any chest pains?

Again, Buck is wide awake. He KNOWS something is wrong with Eddie’s heart/feelings and that Eddie is hiding it from him. He jumps to cold sweats, the kind that are most connected to health problems and are not about the actual temperature in the room. Then follows up with asking about chest pains. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: Buck is paralleled with the cardiologist. She’s about Eddie’s literal heart but Eddie’s figurative heart is in Buck’s hands and Buck’s hands only. And my dude is assertively assessing the situation.

Eddie: You don’t give up, do you? I’m fine, Buck.

Good ol’ Eddie, perfecting his avoidance and denial game. But he knows Buck. He does NOT ever give up and he especially doesn’t give up on the people he loves. Eddie recognized this and thanked Buck for it in 303. Buck didn’t give up on Christopher during the tsunami, or on Eddie in Eddie Begins or in Survivors. But that was about Chris and Eddie’s life. This scene in 502 is new in a way. Buck is refusing to give up on Eddie’s heart, his feelings. Now Buck is fighting for Eddie’s quality of life, for his happiness.

Buck: People who are fine don’t go and see cardiologists. You need to tell me if something is wrong.

Buck was so worried about Eddie in 501. Of course Eddie denied that anything was wrong but Buck isn’t stupid. In 501 he asked about the situation clearly and openly because he cares about Eddie and wants to help in any way he can, and Eddie pushed him away. So here in 502 he implicitly invokes the Will. He’s like fine if you won’t tell me as your friend who gives a shit about you, then tell me for Chris’s sake because thanks to the will, I actually fucking need to know if you’re going to drop dead.

Eddie: Alright, it was a panic attack, not a heart attack. A panic attack.

Eddie’s frustrated confession was solid gold. It laid my edges and raised my credit score. He knows that Buck’s persistence is harmless and comes from a genuine place of respect and care. Still, that doesn’t make it any less annoying for a man who’s trying to sleep, pretending his own heart isn’t breaking under the weight of his sense of duty to his son.

Buck: Since when do you panic?

My God, he knows him so well.

Eddie: That’s what I said. I don’t panic. Except I did.

Eddie accepting that this was absolutely a panic attack was huge. Before he had been pushing against the reality of it, but here in Buck’s loving care he could be honest with himself and with Buck that it was indeed panic.

Buck: Ok, well, what triggered it? I mean you did just get shot and almost killed by a sniper. I guess that could be considered an anxiety inducing-

Buck’s in full “cardiologist” mode. He’s paying forward all those years of therapy! What he’s doing here isn’t a replacement for my dude getting some real therapy but here’s Buck with his clipboard efficiently helping Eddie figure his emotional shit out. It’s perfection. It’s also good that he acknowledged the shooting. I think it’s super important that when Buck mentions it, he looks down and away from Eddie.

Buck, my dude, you are not over being covered in the blood of the love of your life. You can still feel his weight in your hands, muscle memory from lifting him above the spray of gasoline and bullets. Eddie may still be asleep on that front but, Buck, you are wide awake and exhausted by the heavy love you’re carrying.

Eddie: That wasn’t it. Ok, if I’m being honest with myself, I think it was Ana.

Oh this is fun. So you are capable of being real, you just choose not to be. Good to know.

Buck: Uh, I thought things were great with her.

Stop. Lying. You saw Eddie get squirrely when talking about the Christening. You saw Eddie get awkward af when A*a and Christopher came to the firehouse. You’ve seen these issues with your own eyeballs. Great? Really? Yeah, this just makes me think muh boy is oblivious and/or he really was expecting Eddie to come clean about issues related to the shooting, not his love life. This reiterates my point that Buck himself is not nearly done with processing the shooting.

Eddie: She’s been a godsend through all this - staying with Christopher - but I think that’s what’s causing the panic. Somehow it become a ready-made family and I don’t know if I’m ready for that.

This portion of the conversation has been analyzed to bits by many brilliant others. I don’t have anything to add. I’m like, look dude, you already have a family with Buck and Christopher. A*a’s effin’ up your happy healthy family flow. It’s ok, just turn her loose.

Buck: So what are you gonna do?

Buck’s wisdom grows every frickin’ day. He knows this isn’t sustainable for Eddie. He knows that the heart matters. He knows that feelings are real and help us navigate toward a happy life. Action is needed and he’s nudging Eddie in that direction.

Eddie: I think I’m just gonna stick it out. Ana’s been the first woman I’ve wanted to spend this much time with since Shannon.

Oh dear, Eddie’s overblown sense of duty to everyone but himself strikes again. He can…tolerate… A*a. How romantic!

Buck: Stick it out? That’s not the way you talk about someone you’re in love with.

Um, no. Buck calls shenanigans. He’s not A*a’s bestie but he doesn’t feel any desire whatsoever to have her condemned to a loveless relationship.

Eddie: My kid loves her!

Always putting Christopher first but not realizing that if he isn’t truly happy, Christopher will know because he’s perceptive af. Plus the two haven’t discussed A*a on screen so I’m not convinced Chris loves her as much as Eddie wants to believe.

Buck: Is that enough? Eddie I have been Ana. I know what it’s like to be in love with someone who is not all the way in. Deep down you know it and it hurts. It hurts worse than the truth, so if you don’t want to hurt Ana, you owe it to her to be honest.

Buck is doing A LOT of work here to help Eddie see that his plan of inaction is not good. He centers Eddie asking him if staying for Chris is enough. When that doesn’t work, he realizes that Eddie doesn’t care about his own heart enough to leave so he changes strategies and puts himself in A*a’s place to invoke some empathy for A*a from Eddie. It’s super…interesting that Eddie doesn’t care enough for A*a to come to this conclusion on his own!!

Eddie: You know it just feels like a lot man.

Why, my dude?? Explain. Could it be that A*a is serving a purpose beyond Chris? Could it be that staying with her helps you avoid, allows you to pretend and be oblivious to deeper truths within your battered but still beating heart? Does she obscure the Buck shaped hole in your ticker?

Buck: Well, go to sleep. You don’t need to decide right now. It’s not like we’re going home anytime soon.

Buck is disappointed, exhausted, and frustrated and it has my dude slinging shade like morning hash. He’s like fine turn a blind eye, ignore your heart it’s cool *all the sarcasm* Then we get the reference to home and the fact that the two of them are far from it at this point and we all know how important home is as a Buddie theme. I wrote a little about it here.

Bonus: Eddie closed his eyes after Buck walked away, the he OPENED them again. He fully saw what Buck was saying. He can’t avoid the truth of his heart for much longer.

Y’all this has GOT to be the season that one or both of these idiots realize their feelings. Excuse me while I end.

[bookwyrminspiration]

TW// Drugs n such

you asked for it smh, but I've been thinking a lot about that one scene in Neverseen in Exilliums healing tent (or whatever its called)

I had a whole rant here about what the implication of this 'serum' might mean in the lost cities but it kinda spiraled into nothing so I'm cutting it out. (main point was just the mood towards drugs, Shannon has had previous mentions of both alcohol and drunk people, so (though im not saying she should incorporate this into a middle grade book series a t a l l), Id be curious to see her take on drugs, (if they exist and how they effect people and the elven population // how is it treated? Is it looked down upon or even forbidden (why we might only see it in Exillium territories) or is it so normal and inconsequential that its just part of the norm in the lost cities?

but anyway, back to the thing I was originally thinking of - i feel like this is something rarely talked about but pls tell me I'm not the only one who has picked up on how weird Keefe's relationship with sedatives is. It's such a contrast to Sophie, where she's openly opposed to taking any type of sedative he seems to be really open to them, in fact in Unlocked every time he's knocked out by a sedative his language is pretty much always positive, like he really enjoys it. This probably just ties into something you mentioned a while back about Keefe and dealing with stuff by running away but I find it really interesting.

(Sorry if this is an uncomfortable ask to get, I know not everyone is comfortable with drug talk and I hope this Isn't overstepping a line.)

you're fine, don't worry! no lines overstepped. I appreciate you including the warning at the top, even though I'm alright talking with the subject. if there's something I'm uncomfortable with, that's not on you to know or worry about because I haven't shared any of my specific triggers, and the more anxiety-inducing ones are so specific to my personal experiences that I highly doubt they'll ever have any effect on any conversation ever. but I do genuinely appreciate your concern <33

I don't remember specifically what I asked for, but this is a topic I hadn't even realized was so fascinating, so thank you for bringing it up! That scene is kinda funny (as in weird) looking back on it, but Keefe was completely out of it and being a lot more vulnerable than he probably wanted to be due to his state of mind. I think it was intended to mirror something like anesthesia or laughing gas (note: in my brief research trying to find info about the boobrie dude I made a mental comparison between tam and sandor, so I'm just making note of it here so I don't forget), at least as far as Keefe's reaction goes. I think part of this was strategic so that we could get some information and vulnerability (although unwillingly) from Keefe and get that first glimpse of "the boy beneath all that swagger" (paraphrased from Sophie). But that's not what your ask is about so I'll move on before I get even more distracted.

wine, at the very least, exists in the lost cities. we've got fizzleberry wine, which is blamed by some for Caprise Redek's accident. Aside from that we've seen no mention of it, as this is a middle grade series about a young teen girl in a fantasy world, and in a "perfect" world there isn't a lot of talk about recreational substances. And I agree with you! this isn't to say that I think drugs and alcohol should be this huge thing in keeper or that it even needs to be address, just commenting that the attitude the general public has towards substances and intoxication is likely even more severe in the elven world, as has been the pattern with other things. We can tell from Caprise's incident that their wine functions similar if not identical to ours, as it was said to have impaired her motor control and thinking, hence how she fell off that balcony. So I think we could assume that drugs in the Lost Cities would be similar to those in the Forbidden Cities in function. Not in name though, likely named after some strange elven thing. Though if we go with the wine example, Fizzleberry is likely an exact description of what it is--the wine probably fizzes and is made from berries.

the elves highly value the mind, so I anticipate that anything that messes with it past beneficial medicinal uses prescribed by a physician are frowned upon. they think of your mental capacity and capabilities as integral to who you are, and composure as essential. drugs take that away and can impair your reasoning, hence my conclusion they're not well liked. however, I propose that this mindset is mostly those who are very proper, for example Lord Cassius. Dex was more than ready to take concentration serums of his own making--and convinced Sophie to take one (note: dex has almost killed both Sophie and Fitz. that can't be fun to know)--which directly messed with his limbic center. However, as he was raised in an apothecary and is already a little less in line with all other elvin values, I don't think him being an outlier is enough to completely through out my assumption. overall: looked down upon because it messes with the mind and the mind is crucial to elven society, and the way it impairs your thinking would make you a lesser person

and you're right! keefe's relationship with sedative is weird. we have this teenager who grew up without stable supports or a loving family having very little regard for how substances will effect his body, prioritizing the possible--not guaranteed, possible--benefits over all the risks. this is not to say drug use is inherently bad, just that the situation he's in makes me very cautious because he feels more at risk of falling into bad habits. also, your observation about tying that into him running away is very astute! i've talked a lot about him running away from his problems in more ways that physical, and I think this is an excellent example of that

he doesn't like his reality, the world he lives in when he's awake and aware and lucid. it's full of all these problems and people and he doesn't know what to do. but when he's asleep? he doesn't have to deal with any of that. he doesn't have to do anything, but he's also troubled enough and anxious enough that sleep doesn't always come easy, and he can be plagued by nightmares. but those sedatives mess with his mind and not only make him sleep faster and longer, but they can mess with your dreams and alter the reality you experience while asleep. i guess it could be a way of trying to take control of a situation he had very little control over, especially in unlocked when everyone else was trying to fix things without consulting him. with his waking world that bad, of course he's gonna like anything that takes him away from it.

it stands out especially when we switch to him as a narrator and he's praising these things and wanting to be sedated, as we've spent so long in Sophie's head and she's so against them from the trauma she experienced in the first book. that could mean his attitude them is more jarring just because we're used to Sophie and it wouldn't seem as dramatic if we'd switched from say, Fitz's head. but that doesn't mean there's nothing here.

i think i've said it before, but Keefe doesn't have any healthy coping strategies right now that he consistently relies on. his deference towards avoidance and making the problem go away, even if it's just in feeling induced by drugs, is a more extreme example of how he doesn't know how to just exist without hurting.

I jumped around a bit between topics so if I missed something you wanted to talk about more in depth please feel free to send another ask! Keefe's relationship to experiencing reality is fascinating and covers things from denial and refusal to change all the way to drugs and literally altering the way his brain perceives reality. This boy is on a collision course with destruction in both body and mind.

[lesbianbuck-archived]

EVAN BUCKLEY WEEK DAY SIX - “LET GO OF MY HAND” + ANGST

The day so far has been quiet, not that Buck will ever make the mistake of saying that out loud again.

Obviously Buck became a firefighter for the actual fighting fires part of the job, but he likes these shifts once in a while: a few hours between each call, lounging and snacking and getting his ass beat at Mario Kart. Having just finished dinner, they’re only halfway through their shift, and Buck is lounging on the couch next to Eddie. Holding his hand. 

Because, yeah, that’s a thing he can do now.

Eddie is reading something on his phone and Buck is just existing next to him, watching Chim and Hen bicker over the next video game they’re going to play since they stuck some of the probies with dish duty. It’s nice, it feels like home, and Buck lets out a sigh and leans his head back against the couch, closing his eyes.

He’s shaken awake by Bobby an unknown amount of time later, and when Buck finally opens his eyes and processes his surroundings, Bobby is looking at him with a tense expression.

“Buck, your parents are here. We couldn’t get them to leave.”

Buck sits up abruptly and looks over Bobby’s shoulder to see his parents standing at the top of the stairs, holding each other in the cold way that only people who have spent a lifetime caring how people see them can manage to do. And honestly, Buck just woke up and he’s not thinking straight; the only thing going through his head is survive because he feels like a kid who got caught red-handed and his parents didn’t care that he slept around as long as it was with women—

“Shit, Eddie, let go of my hand.”

Eddie replies, “What?” but he still drops Buck’s hand like it’s searing hot.

“Um,” Buck clears his throat and pushes himself up off the couch, laser-focused on his parents but not able to look them in the eye. “What are you guys doing in LA?”

“We came to meet our granddaughter,” his mom says, and Buck can’t imagine that went well. He hopes Chim did most of the talking since Maddie is still trying to fight her way out of the dark. “We figured we would stop by and say hello.”

“You didn’t have to,” Buck replies. Even though he and his parents had worked out some of their issues in therapy, there are still things he can’t talk to them about without tearing open age old wounds. Their relationship will never be idyllic. Buck just has to accept that, as much as the little kid in him still yearns for their approval. For their love. “I’m fine. I’m, uh. I’m good, actually.”

He realizes everyone else has scattered to give them space, and he kind of wishes that they hadn’t. Being alone with his parents always makes him feel like he’s about to get scolded, even now that he’s 29 and they don’t really have the right to scold him for anything anymore. He stands his ground though, even if deep down he doesn’t feel brave, and a few tense words later they leave as quickly as they came.

When the coast is clear, everyone slowly shuffles back into the loft area except for Eddie, and Buck only notices because he’s itching to see him.

He goes looking because he feels untethered, needs to be grounded, and finds Eddie stocking supplies in the back of the ladder truck with the doors closed. And that’s concerning because Eddie doesn’t ever close the doors, says he needs to be aware of everything around him at all times, a relic of coming home from Afghanistan but especially after—

Well. After.

Buck knocks on the doors a little harder than he means to, and Eddie looks up at him through the little window. Buck can tell he’s deciding whether or not to let him in, and Buck doesn’t understand why until he remembers Shannon, and then he does.

He yanks the door open before Eddie can get to it, climbing up inside and closing it behind him.

“What the fuck��”

“Eddie, that wasn’t what you think it was.” Eddie stares somewhere in the vicinity of Buck’s knees, his lips pressed together. He doesn’t look angry—it’s been a long time since Buck has seen Eddie angry, so he’s not surprised—he just looks… hurt. Buck’s heart aches. “Look, it’s not because I don’t want people to know, or that I’m ashamed or anything, it’s… it’s just—”

“You don’t want them to know.”

Buck exhales through his nose, his fists clenching uncomfortably at his sides. Not… exactly? He eventually wants his parents to know, needs them to see how happy Eddie and Christopher make him and watch them fight between their impeccable social personas and their rage that will be just underneath the surface. 

“They caught me off guard, Eddie. I just reverted back to being fifteen when they would barge into my room and see me with…” Buck trails off. Stares down at his feet. “They never cared if it was a girl. But they would scream if it…”

Eddie’s hand is soft where it touches his elbow. “Buck, I understand. It was hard to work up the nerve to tell my parents about you, but once I did, telling them was easy. Because honestly, as long as they leave Christopher alone, I don’t care what they think. But you… you still care.”

Buck nods, still staring at his feet. He shouldn’t care anymore, but he does, and he also cares about having it out in public where everyone else can see. Usually, Buck has no issue airing out his dirty laundry in the middle of the station, but whatever his parents might say would cut deeper than anything even Bobby could ever say to him. He doesn’t want to make that into a spectacle.

“Buck, look at me.” Eddie’s eyes are warm, but his stance is firm. “I understand the way that you’re feeling, and I need you to know that I trust you. With my son’s life, with my life, everything. But if you’re not ready to give everything to this, then you know… you know we can’t. As much as it would break me, Christopher doesn’t deserve anything less than full commitment. I won’t put him through that.”

“I know,” Buck’s voice shakes. “Eddie, I know. You’re right. I’m sorry. I just couldn’t—not in front of everyone like that. I feel like I belong here, and I can’t let them taint it by yelling at me for being with you. They don’t get to ruin this. It would break me too, Eddie.”

Eddie’s thumb rubs across the skin of his arm, and Buck can feel his eyes start to water. Not now, not when he’s trying to be serious, every fucking time—

“Hey, it’s okay. I’m sorry too. I jumped to conclusions about why you hid.”

And Buck thinks back to Shannon, about how Eddie hid her from everyone else even though they were married, how they sneaked around and only saw each other when they could cover it up and what that ultimately meant for her relationship with Christopher. “I understand why you did. But you have to know I would never be ashamed of you and Chris, and I would never do anything to hurt either of you. Especially not Chris.”

“I know,” Eddie says casually like he believes it, and of course he does because they’ve talked about it, and he pulls Buck down by the shoulder to kiss him gently. “I told you, I trust you. I just need you to be one hundred percent on this.”

“I am,” Buck says without hesitation. He reaches down and slides his hand into Eddie’s, squeezing in a way that he hopes is reassuring. “My parents are in town for a few more days. What do you say we go tell them tomorrow?”

Eddie squeezes back. “You want me with you?”

Buck smiles, bending down so he can bump his nose against Eddie’s. “Always.”

[reachgirl]

My thoughts on “Buddie”

 1. I think if Fox could realize that sometimes you can’t *plan* for chemistry, it just happens, and when it does it’s magic and you need to let it play out, they would be so far ahead of the curve of other shows and fans beyond their core audience would take notice.  The material IS there to defend it actually happening against claims that they just bowed down to the shippers.

2. On the one hand, I believe that the writers are very deliberately writing a lot of subtext and the directors are leaving in scenes where the actors are making certain choices, both Ryan/Oliver and Peter/Kenneth/Aisha/JLH. But is it just as a “shout out” to the Buddie shippers, or an actual deliberate effort to make a point of how close they are and how dependent they’ve become on their relationship?

3. I’ve talked before how I think deciding on your character’s sexuality before you actually write them out for a while just doesn’t make for believable humanity based on reality. If we’re looking at these two examples, 

Buck has been written in a way that could very well make him bi/pan and not everybody who is and is secure in their identity will go and talk about it constantly. I would also like to remind everyone that bi does not mean you have to stick to a certain quota, like keep your relationships 50/50 male/female. There are many people who are bi who tend to end up in more relationships/even just sexual ones with one gender, and that doesn’t make them less bi or pan. So just because we have only seen him have female love interests during the show, there are some scenes (”Your man crush on Eddie”/”I’m not setting you up with my brother/Hey Now”) that could be interpreted to mean that might not always have been the case, Maddie being the one who would have been there to witness it. We also see Buck not really caring about the social conventions - not only of who he dates - he is consistently written as meeting every person he meets on eye level - even making sure the guy who stole his identity to catfish women wouldn’t lose his dignity in death, but also romantically, we can see him building a connection with Abby through the phone first and falling in love with her as a person, and not caring about her being quite a lot older.

Eddie, and I’ve written about this before, is a little bit of an enigma. Again, we have only seen him in one relationship, and while it doesn’t seem like it was the happiest of marriages, in the end it really did seem like he loved Shannon and wanted to make it work. Up until Ms. Florez we have also seen him almost making a point of not looking to date (”They’re not my type”/”You didn’t set me up, did you?”), and that is pretty much all we know about him. Again, the fact that he was married to a woman and once flirted with one briefly, does not prove or disprove anything. He grew up in Texas, in latino culture, and spent a good amount of his formative years in the US Army, all of these can traditionally be quite conservative. From personal experience even I have seen many people who grew up in conservative environments fall in line with the expectations set for them by their communities (often very early, and Eddie and Shannon did get married quite young), especially if their community doesn’t provide a lot of LGBTQ-visibility or role models. Yes, Eddie does “act” straight, whatever that means and whether that is an actual concept, but the way he behaves in a lot of scenes with Buck, and I’ll get back to this in point 8., could be interpreted in other ways.

4. TV today has gotten a lot better at showing LGBTQ relationships that aren’t a) just on the sidelines b) serving as collateral emotional damage to drive the plot or c) are written in a way that is basically just taking a hetero-couple-storyline and casting two people of the same gender in it. I am worried that they think they can’t do the “coming out later in life” storyline again with Buddie because they already have Michael (which brings me back to point 1. Let the damn magic happen when it’s right in front of your eyes), and they can’t have another main cast LGBTQ character - or two - because they already have Hen (and Karen). Obviously these are not valid reasons, look at other shows like 911 Lone star for representation within the main cast, but of course, this is a double edged sword because there is a concern that they gave us 911 Lone Star to do what they wouldn’t or couldn’t do with the original. (On a side note, Owen Strand is the fairy godfather of Texas and I live for that show)

5. Parallels. This has been talked about a lot, and there are much better posts about it than this one. But writers aren’t stupid, or careless, so I do believe that to a certain extent they’re aware of how they are setting up parallels between Buck and Eddie’s love lives. We have them agreeing to “have each other’s backs” in contrast to Shannon telling Eddie that he never had hers. We have Eddie telling Buck that there is no one he trusts more with Christopher than him, while he makes it clear that while he thinks he can forgive Shannon, he doesn’t think he can trust her. We had Shannon coming back just as Buck decides to leave Abby behind finally, and we had Ali showing up when Shannon dies, and now Ana when the writers point out how single Buck is.

6. Themes. The episode themes in 9-1-1 are kinda like horoscopes, they’re meant to be able to work for multiple storylines and connect all the main characters through one focus. But we’ve seen a lot of themes surrounding family or trust or love that have an obvious connection to a Buddie moment on the show. Chosen Family. Home. Being able to trust your partner. Seizing the day. And even when it’s something that doesn’t immediately connect the two, the scenes are cut in a way that imply there’s a connection, like Eddie telling Chim to tell Maddie he loves her, because tomorrow isn’t promised. Chim calls Maddie to invite her to dinner to finally do this, and right before this we see Eddie asking Buck to lunch - this is probably just a coincidence, right? But we can be sure that the director, writers and cutters were aware of this, and made the choice to do it this way, for whatever reason. Because this is their exact job, telling stories through how they cut scenes together. 7. Christopher. So this might be what makes Buddie a little more unique compared to the, admittedly, dozens of other seemingly “straight bromances” that people have shipped. Most scenes we get with Buck and Eddie that are outside of work, involve Chris in some way. It’s probably safe to say that part of the reason they became so close is because Buck and Chris have a connection that I would wager goes beyond what most friends have with their single-dad-friend’s kid. We see how important Buck becomes in Christopher’s life, and vice versa, pretty much a few episodes after they meet for the first time. Eddie trusts Buck with Chris’ life, and he trusts him with any problems relating to Christopher that he needs to work through. Buck’s his sounding board for his role as a parent, which is interesting considering Eddie has other friends at the 118 that actually are parents? *cough* Chosen family *cough*

8. Closeness. As I said above, sometimes writers plan one storyline, but the magic happens somewhere they didn’t expect, and if that is the case, and you want to be faithful to your characters, you should seize that opportunity. I think we can all agree this is one of those cases where the chemistry is just off the charts. There are long looks, there is a lot of being in sync, there’s constant physical contact when they’re sitting or walking next to each other. Personal space, who? Again, this is something the director could discourage, or use a take that didn’t have Buck grab his belt buckle and invading Eddie’s personal space in his own kitchen, but they decided on this take. They decided on the take of Eddie clearly checking out Buck’s behind and Chim noticing. Now Buck seems to be pretty comfortable with closeness anyway, but Eddie isn’t the most touchy guy with anyone else, so this is noticeable. And it works.

9. Look. Somebody sat down and wrote “You want to go for the title?” and I would pay a lot of money to see the stage directions on that script because holy fuck. There’s a lot of info in their exchanges - and it implies that there are lots of moments that these two talk that we don’t get to see - Buck immediately knows about Eddie and Ana, and he knew about the situation with Shannon too (and didn’t hide his jealousy very well). When they don’t talk, it clearly gets to Eddie, who doesn’t have that many other people he really trusts and can open up to. Cue “husbands fighting in the supermarket”. But what’s also interesting to me is that their dynamic involves a lot of Eddie teasing Buck. “Exoskeleton” “Aren’t you still in that phase?” “You would have talked me into buying a more expensive one”.. and Eddie sometimes uses it to keep their conversations from getting into dangerous, emotional territory, like during the kitchen scene. And I don’t know about y’all, but that sounds like something I’ve done before when I knew there was something to get into, and I just didn’t know how or when. 

_______________________________________

Wow I could keep going but this is already so long. I’m so sorry everyone. But I figured we all now have two weeks so we have time to do a lot of reading 😅Thanks everybody for reminding me about the things that do make it seem like Buddie is an actual possibility, because most of the time, I have to admit, I’m like 70/30 against the hope of it becoming reality. Long live fanfiction! In conclusion, please make it happen, or explain all the choices you have made. YOU CAN’T! 

[rhina988]

The Heart Wants What It Wants - Chapter 21

Start from the beginning

Chapter 20

Nicole’s POV

Buzz, buzz

Half awake I started patting my hands over the nightstand searching for my cell-phone that was ringing off the hook.

“What?!” with half-sleepy voice I barely succeeded to say a word, furious at whoever was waking me up.

“Um... sorry for waking you up... at 11 a.m. but I just wanted to see if we’re on for today,” Maya said almost chuckling, and I immediately jumped off the bed.

“11 o’clock... What the...” I was shocked at how I was able to sleep in, “umm... yes. One o’clock at our restaurant?”

“OK, see you then,” Maya said officially, probably realizing she shouldn’t have reacted the way she did. We were not friends anymore, and she acted as if she was allowed to tease me even just a little.

Dropping the phone on my bed, I pressed my temples, trying to figure out how I fell asleep so hard. Looking through the room, I saw a bottle of pills lying on my nightstand. I must’ve taken a few pills more than I was prescribed, and now here we are. I was dealing with some serious case of insomnia lately, and I thought sleeping pills will help me fall asleep, but not knock me out for more than 12 hours.

Luckily, it was Saturday, and I wasn’t going to work, otherwise I’d have some serious explaining to do. It’s enough that probably the entire company knows about me and Lucas, and the last thing I needed was to add another scandal to my resume.

Picking myself up, I went to the bathroom and I wasn’t the least pleased with what I saw in the mirror. My dark circles were really on a roll, and my face was pale as if I haven’t seen the light of day in a year. After washing my face, I took a long shower and washed my hair to help me get back to life. This was one of the longest sleeps I’ve had in ages, and it didn’t feel as good as I thought it would. Nevertheless, I needed to look decent and act as if I was feeling amazing, because the conversation Maya and I were about to have is going to be anything but easy.

Jared’s POV

Knock, knock

“Come in!”

“Hey bro, you’re not sleeping yet?” Shannon walked into my room, looking all mysterious.

“No, I can’t fall asleep,” I said and exhaled, “I’ve been trying to take my mind off  that paparazzo shots that were taken today and that girl hugging me...so I took a few selfies for Snapchat... but it’s not working... nothing can keep me from tormenting myself with what Nicole might think when she sees the pics.”

“I saw your Snapchat, that’s why I came by. You didn’t look so well, and I knew something was bothering you. I figured you’d be concerned about that. Are the pictures online yet?”

I just nodded, pressing my lips together.

“That’s not good. Has Nicol texted you anything? Do you think she saw it?”

“I don’t know Shannon,” I said in frustration, jumping off the bed, “my mind is filled with all these random thoughts and I just hope Nicole will stay away from all the news until we’re back. I just know she will misinterpret everything.... and on top of everything I feel like shit because of this flu...” I started pacing across the room, running my fingers through my hair as my breathing picked up the pace and I started to cough a little. The nervousness was consuming me and all I could do is just sit here and wait until we’re back home in a few days.

“Well, at least we’ll be back the day after tomorrow and you can deal with everything then. You spoke over the phone, she said you’re her priority and from what I’ve heard there’s little that can really take her away from you.” Shannon was trying to console me, but I knew Nicole. Just a glance at that photo and she’ll be back to that you’re having a girl in every country of the world story.

“You should give her some credit, J. I know she was too harsh on you lately, and you can’t really blame her for not trusting you, I mean you are a rock start after all. But what I’m trying to say is that she felt how it would be to actually lose you, and I think that she’d do everything to always work on issues you might have, from now on. She won’t allow herself to jump to the conclusions anymore.”

I listened and just waved my head in disbelief.

“Shan, you’re my brother, and I love you, but you’re such a sucker for girls... you really don’t know them. She’s a woman, a beautiful, smart and confident woman. The last thing she’d do after seeing me smiling and hugging another girl is think, Hmm, look, what a cute fangirl. No, she’ll think it’s one of my go-to girls I fuck when I’m in the country.”

Nicole’s POV

It was almost 1 o’clock and I was in a cab, driving to the restaurant. My head suddenly started to pulse, causing an annoying discomfort. Just what I needed, more problems to make me nervous. I really wanted to go see Maya relaxed, but today was out to get me with its headaches, oversleeping and God knows what else.

Stepping out of the cab, I saw a few reporters starting to run towards me once I was outside. Fortunately, I was only a few steps away from the entrance, and before they were able to take any major shots, I was inside.

“Hey,” I said breathing rapidly after rushing inside and through the restaurant, looking for Maya.

“Hi, are you OK,” Maya asked in surprise seeing me all flustered.

“Yeah,... it’s just these crazy paparazzi... I have no idea why they came after me like that,” I said and sat down, taking a sip of water that was already on the table.

“I took the liberty to order us some pasta. I hope you don’t mind,” Maya said with a smile.

“It’s fine, I’m kinda hungry actually”

“OK, so what I wanted to say is that Lucas and I are...” the moment she mentioned the two of them together my face turned several colors, “... we never meant to hurt anyone.”

“Yeah, that’s what all the cheating ba...” refraining myself from calling them “bastards” and insulting them, I bit my tongue and continued,”...couples ...say.”

“I know it’s a cliché, but it’s true. I liked him for a long time, and I know I shouldn’t have. You know better than anyone that when the heart wants something, there’s not much you can do against it,” Maya was becoming more nervous by the second, and I could see she really was feeling remorseful.

“For how long?” I asked angrily.

“What?”

“How long have you two been ... together?”

“Does it really matter? I mean you two are finished and...”

“How. Long. Maya.” I asked through gritted teeth, squeezing a fork, and she just gulped at my reaction.

“Almost a year,” she blurred it out hoping she would be able to continue, “but only the last...”

“Stop!” I almost screamed, “I don’t care when the things became serious or however you want to call it. I just wanted to know for how long he pretended to love me and planned a wedding with me while he was screwing you.”

At that moment, the waiter came with our orders, which couldn’t be the better timing for us to catch a breath. After he was gone, we just sat there for a minute not speaking and letting our thoughts and feelings settle down.

“It’s all water under the bridge now. I am with Jared, Lucas is with .... you,” I said rolling my eyes, “and that’s it.”

“And what about you and me?” Maya asked with tears in her eyes.

“There’s no you and me, Maya, we’re done.”

“No, Nicole, don’t say that, please.”

“I will be here for you if you ever need any kind of help, but we’re not friends. We can’t be friends after this. You betrayed me, and you don’t deserve my friendship. I’ll forgive you, but I can’t and won’t forget. You’ll just have to accept that.”

“You can really throw away more than a decade of friendship, just like that?” she asked with trembling voice.

“If you could, why couldn’t I?”

“Nicole... I never...”

“The road to hell is paved with good intentions, and you saying you never meant to hurt me is kinda ridiculous. What if Jared and I hadn’t met, and if Lucas and I have got married? Huh? Would you have still continue to screw him, and become his mistress?” I asked matter-of-factly.

“I don’t know... I guess I secretly hoped you wouldn’t marry him,” she was honest for the first time in forever.

“That’s why you encouraged Jared’s and mine relationship, and gave him my number, didn’t you?”

“Yes. I never saw you as happy as you were in Mexico, and something was telling me that you and Lucas just weren’t made for each other. I love him, Nicole, I really do. I didn’t think that would happen, because truth be told, everything started out as just sex, fun and reckless excitement. But I love him now.”

I was shocked to hear that. In her entire life, Maya only loved one guy, and everyone else was just a fling. This confession really got to me.

“Wow, I had no idea... I’m sort of glad you are in a good place now, but I still don’t think we can be friends again. Just try to understand me, and look at things from my perspective.”

“OK, I’ll respect your decision, and hope you’ll just change your mind.”

“Thank you, now let’s eat I’m famished.”

Before I could even take a bite of my lunch, the damn phone buzzed and it was Twitter again. I forgot to turn off those damn notifications and now I was definitely going to do it. Unfortunately, I couldn’t hold back from checking out that notification and when I saw the news my heart almost stopped. A picture of Jared and a girl smiling and hugging in Moscow.

I knew this day was going to be too much for me to handle.

Chapter 22 

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Let me know if you’d like me to tag you in the next chapters.

Hope you enjoyed it.

You can read the story on Wattpad as well

@wolfgirl1074 @nikkitasevoli @iraniq @elliegrace139 @iridescxntsolitude @lanfear619 @msroxyblog @sookieblack12 @prettypinkbabyunicorn @aliencataf @snewsome756 @ddg90

[evenstevensranked]

#34: Season 3, Episode 7 - “Raiders of the Lost Sausage”

Louis accidentally discovers that there might very well be buried treasure under his house and he’s determined to retrieve it. An Indiana Jones parody ensues. Meanwhile, Ren and Larry are literally tied together by the school guidance counselor in an attempt to end their rivalry. It’s quality content.

The very first minute of this episode lets you know right away that you’ve hit good’ol zany as hell Season 3. It opens with an emu being delivered to the Stevens house. Yes, an emu. Louis ordered one on a whim one day. We get a flashback to when he ordered it, which is pretty great. He called the totally legit and not completely asinine sounding company “Emu For You” and started awkwardly dancing to the jazzy elevator hold music. 

Steve is the one who has to accept the emu delivery and is obviously furious. The bird immediately starts eating a family photo and I love how even in a professional, dressy portrait -- Louis is still wearing a Hawaiian shirt. 

I want a relationship with someone as strong as the bond between Louis Stevens and Hawaiian shirts. 

Louis is currently in the basement with Twitty and Tom, “bowling” with a frozen turkey and some soda bottles (the usual) -- when suddenly the frozen turkey goes flying through the wall, revealing a suspicious small tunnel. 

Steve confronts Louis about the emu and Louis pulls some lame excuse out of his butt for ordering it. He says they should start breeding emus. Steve is all “Breed emus.... With one bird...” pointing out that lil flaw in Louis’ idea. That’s pretty funny. There’s a bit here where Eileen finds a giant emu egg and interrupts their conversation through the basement window, and gets attacked by the bird. You don’t actually see it happening though, all you see are feathers flying everywhere. Steve goes to help her and he too gets attacked. I always cringe at this, tbh. It’s just one of those wacky Season 3 gags. Anyway... Louis, Twitty and Tom agree to meet up the next day and investigate the tunnel. 

Now, onto the subplot! We see Ren and Larry in Principal Wexler’s office, in trouble for accidentally pieing him in the face. They had the responsibility of choosing a new dessert for the cafeteria and couldn’t agree on one. They were goiiiing to pie each other, but Wexler walked between them that exact second. Of course. They’re still fervently arguing in front of Wexler so he decides that their rivalry has gone too far and they need to work it out with the school guidance counselor.

This photo makes me relate to the “....now kiss!” meme. 

Louis does some hardcore research on what that tunnel in the house might lead to and comes to an... interesting conclusion. He discovers that a man named Grover Frazee, creator of Frazee Sausages, owned the property their house is built on. He became super rich off of the company and Louis believes that he most likely buried his fortune at the end of the tunnel. Something interesting: take a look at the opening credits for the episode...

Written by SCOTT FRAZEE! Dude legit named this sausage guy character after himself, lol. I always thought that was cute. I’ve said many times before that the writers are always throwing personal things in. I love it. Check out Grover’s bio though... yikes. 

I’m not sure I’d be proud of that legacy. Also, he died at 43 years old... Pretty young. Maybe he ate a contaminated sausage and croaked. Also, all this talk of sausages feels like another innuendo. This show has no chill. 

Louis put so much effort into his analysis, though. He treated it like a freaking college research project. Again, if he put this much effort into actual school assignments, he’d give Ren a run for her scholastic money. Tom is pretty great here. He starts singing the “We bet, you’ll go crazy... for that great, taste of Frazeeeee” jingle. It’s fantastic. 

Ms. Shannon, the guidance counselor, decides to try an experimental exercise with Ren and Larry: Physically tying them together for 5 school days. As much as I looove this subplot, this always bothered me. Mainly because, how the heck does Ms. Shannon expect that to work? What if they have different classes, or need to be at different places at the same time, etc? We get a montage showing how they struggle with stuff like this throughout the day. The only issue is that the length of the leash dramatically changes depending on the scene. It’s so frustrating!  

They clearly kept changing the length just so certain ideas could work. It bothers me so much, lol. I’m also 100% positive that’s not even where Ren’s locker is. 

Louis, Twitty and Tom get to work shoveling out the tunnel. They bring in Beans to be their “dirt moving specialist” which is so annoying. He carries dirt in his pants from the basement to their laundry room like an idiot. They literally spend a minute showing him walking back and forth past Steve. It takes so long for Steve to catch on, it’s... ugh. 

Why is he standing on the top of the little mound like that? lol. He says he’s putting the dirt in the laundry room because “there’s a big, scary bird in the backyard!” 

Steve obviously goes down to the basement and catches them in the shoveling act. Twitty asks Louis what he’s going to do with his share of the money and Louis says “You know I’ve always wanted to travel. Help out the folks. Might even buy the old man a nice toupee, ahh?!” -- Unfortunately, Twitty is gone and replaced by Steve. We get a legendary Louis Scream. Can we talk about how Louis has always wanted to travel, though??? I suddenly want to see a happy Louis Stevens backpacking across the country later in life... oh wait. THAT ACTUALLY HAPPENED. Shia LaBeouf is Louis Stevens, y’all. The similarities never end. 

Steve is piiiissssed. Louis tries to explain that he’s done his research and there’s definitely... probably... buried treasure there. But, since Louis is always goofing off, Steve is convinced it’s another one of his crazy “half-baked schemes.” “NO! IT’S NOT HALF-BAKED! IT’S FULLY BAKED!!!” Louis insists. Steve basically temporarily grounds him. There’s a great bit with Donnie eating an emu egg that Eileen cooked for him. They’re delicious apparently, so she starts to see the bright side to having the bird around. “When life gives you lemons!” she says. And Donnie’s all “.......no, mom. They’re eggs.” What an underrated character. Steve walks in and starts complaining about Louis. Donnie pulls a 180 and tells him “You don’t have to believe in what Louis is doing. Just believe in Louis.” Dang, Donnie coming through with the proverbs. Steve takes this to heart and starts looking into Louis’ research. 

Louis is so smart when he wants to be. Steve appreciates this.

They make this scene into a trippy sequence with eerie tinkering piano in the background as Steve remembers Donnie’s reverberating words of wisdom. I’ve always really liked this. We think he’s hearing Donnie’s voice in his head, but it’s actually Donnie creeping from around the corner saying the sentence repeatedly. “I heard you the first time, finish your eggs!” Steve says. This is hilarious. Immediately after that, they make the hands on a clock spin out of control, making it seem like hours and hours are passing by while Steve looks into Louis’ research. But then Steve just walks up to it and says “...I gotta fix that clock.” I always thought this was so freaking funny but to this day my mom doesn’t understand the joke and it drives me craaaaaazy! Louis comes downstairs to apologize, and to his surprise... Steve is on his side now! They team up and start diggin’ for that treasure! While they’re digging we get two of the greatest lines in the entire series:

Steve: “Louis.... why aren’t you at school?”

Louis: “...Why aren’t you at work?” 

THIS IS SO PERFECT! I was going to point out that Louis, Twitty, Tom and Beans all should’ve been at school the whole time... but I was waiting until now to bring it up. TV shows always mess up timelines like that. This was such a hilarious way for the writers to acknowledge their mistake. So good. Mr. Scott Frazee and Co aren’t totally out of the woods, though. Louis and Steve are in the same clothes for basically the entire episode. But Larry and Ren’s subplot tells us that at least two days have gone by. Either Louis and Steve didn’t shower or change clothes for 2 days...... or they messed up. Oops. 

Back at school, Larry and Ren are tangled around a tree (again, the leash was like, a foot long when they were trying to get at their “lockers” -- but now it’s conveniently long enough for them to get tangled around a tree.) They’re stuck and talk about how this experiment has only made them resent each other more. 

But the longer they hate each other, the longer they’re tied together. So they both immediately get the idea to become fake fast friends so that Ms. Shannon will remove the leash. After frantically untangling themselves, they return to Ms. Shannon’s office and act all cuddly -- gushing over how well they get along after only two days! They say things in unison and Larry even calls Ren “silly soulmate.” Omg. Ms. Shannon agrees to untie them. 

They leave the office giggling and laughing at how they successfully tricked her, without realizing that the experiment worked, lol. They’re actually getting along and it’s beautiful ok...

I had to include this overabundance of screenshots because look how precious!! This episode always manages to remind me how SALTY I AM over the fact that they never got together. What a power couple they could���ve been. A giant missed opportunity for a big series finale plot twist, if you ask me. They slowly realize that they’re getting along and are freaked out. They start yelling the same exact sentences at each other.... in unison..... because they’re silly soulmates. That’s the end of the subplot. 

Back at the Stevens house, Louis and Steve have made it to the end of the tunnel. *dun dun dunnnn.* They reach a tiny door and use an extravagant key conveniently left under a little welcome mat before crawling inside the cave -- where a giant golden sausage is prominently displayed. 

This is another one of those moments where I notice how much Shia LaBeouf and Tom Virtue actually look like father and son. Also... as a critically thinking child, I always thought “how the hell does this cave even exist? It’s not like it’s under the basement. The layout literally makes it just another room next to the basement. So that entire cave, with a ridiculously tall ceiling, would need to fit under a section of their house. Improbable.” It sucks not being able to suspend reality sometimes. 

They approach the sausage and realize it might be booby-trapped. So they end up pulling an Indiana Jones. They even have Louis say, “I saw this in a movie once... You know what we need? A counterweight or something!” Slick. 

But also like the famous Indy scene, the cave starts to collapse. Steve says “.......is that an.... ominous rumble?” which I love. For whatever reason, Steve runs away but Louis stays still for a ridiculous amount of time. In fact, just long enough for the ground to break and leave a giant gap between them. Louis makes an (iconic) jump for it: 

Unfortunately, he drops the sausage once he reaches the other side and it falls down the gap into the great unknown. This makes me so incredibly frustrated every time, lol. But, they couldn’t exactly let the Stevens family become millionaires right? 

And that’s it!! The main plot of this episode was never one of my personal favorites, but it definitely gets a whole lot of iconic points. As I mentioned at the beginning, this is a zany Season 3 plot, which have always been a lil difficult for me to get into. But there’s no denying that Louis’ jump is hilarious and the whole idea for this episode, including the title, is golden (no pun intended.) Not to mention this is yet another episode that eerily predicted Shia LaBeouf’s future. We all know he went on to star in Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull. Say what you will about that movie.. but... He was in it. Which marks another strange parallel between Louis and Shia tbh.

And of course, I absolutely adore the Ren/Larry subplot. It’s like, THE episode to convince you that a romance between the two of them should’ve happened. It’s just great honestly. 

Thanks for reading! Do you have any thoughts on this super memorable episode? Sound off below please! (Seriously, getting one little comment on here makes my day and reassures me that I’m not talking to myself lol) 

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[mermaidsirennikita]

July 2017 Book Roundup

In July, I read eight books--most of which were unfortunately mediocre to poor.  However, there were a couple of standouts, and one of them was fantastic.  My favorite book of the month was Riley Sager’s Final Girls, a thinky thriller that deconstructs the concept of a final girl, while at the same time embracing the best parts of slasher movies.  If you love Scream and I Know What You Did Last Summer, you have to try this book.  

So--below is the good and the (unfortunately, moreso) bad or fair to middling.

Dividing Eden by Joelle Charbonneau.  2/5.  After the assassination of the king and crown prince, the kingdom of Eden is left in turmoil.  The crown would go to the king’s widow, but after she goes mad, that’s not an option anymore.  That means that twins Andreus and Carys are left to battle each other for the throne--or else give up their family’s rights to the kingdom and endanger their own lives.  Aaaand that’s pretty much it.  There are romances thrown in, but the book moves incredibly slow for its length.  The assassinations--events that we know occur because that’s the plot--take forever to actually happen, and for that matter once it does happen it’s really fucking nothing.  It’s super predictable, the villain can be spotted from a mile away, and that makes Carys and Andreus seem super stupid.  Also, Andreus is cursed or something and Carys has a magical drug addiction.  The other issue I have with the book is that so much is made of how close the twins are--and a brother-sister twin relationship is such a cool topic to write about--but the fact is that they aren’t close.  If they were, they wouldn’t be ready to stab each other in the back at a moment’s notice.  Not the smartest book.

The Shark Club by Ann Kidd Taylor.  3/5.  As a young girl, Maeve was bitten by a shark.  The event sparked a lifelong passion for the creatures, and at thirty she’s returning home to her grandmother’s hotel as a successful shark researcher.  Recently, she’s sparked the beginnings of a romance with fellow researcher Nicholas--but back home, she runs into former fiance and childhood love Daniel, now the chef at the hotel and the single father of a young girl.  Maeve’s feelings for Daniel return as she bonds with his daughter, the situation further complicated by an illegal shark finning operation nearby.  This book is well-written, and while it didn’t thrill me in any way, it was pleasant.  It’s very much a “finding yourself” story, and I think that a lot of people would like it--you could call it a thinking beach read.  At the same time, however, I found certain plot points to be rather predictable.  But I appreciated the focus on sharks, animals that I love, and the ongoing threat of finning.  

One True Loves by Taylor Jenkins Reid.  3/5.  Emma married her high school sweetheart, Jesse, with whom she was madly in love.  The day before their first wedding anniversary, he went missing, and was presumed dead.  Three and a half years later, Emma is engaged to her new love, Sam, when she receives the news that Jesse has been found alive.  Now--who does she really want to be with?  I gave this three stars because I read it over the course of a day and it was certainly engaging, and Reid writes romance in a really lovely way and many people have and will love this.  But this was no Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo.  It actually kind of infuriated me.  It’s painfully obvious what Emma’s choice will be, the first half of the book breezes through each romance in a way that makes it difficult to get attached to either one, and the latter half is largely Emma dithering and treating each guy like shit.  The thing that irritated me most is that--well, look, I felt condescended to.  The old Emma loved to travel and see the world, and it’s implied that this was all a part of her youth and now she’s more mature and values the Real Things.  She’s Mature.  And I’m like, bitch you’re just kinda boring now.  There’s a scene where she’s basically like “I don’t like to fuck on kitchen counters anymore, I’m not in my twenties anymore I’m in my thirties”.  BITCH YOU ARE THIRTY-ONE HE HAS BEEN MISSING FOR 3.5 YEARS NOT TWENTY.  Like I respect her moving on and have no issue with that time frame, but Emma acted as if Jesse had been away for decades when he just hadn’t.  Sigh.

The Incarnations by Susan Barker.  4/5.  Beijing taxi driver Wang begins receiving mysterious letters from a stranger that claims to be connected to him through their past lives.  Detailing their different lives together, the stranger clearly also knows a lot about Wang’s current life, including his troubled marriage and his young daughter.  Desperate to find out who his “stalker” is, Wang becomes obsessed with the letters, and in the process confronts his own troubled past.  This is a dark fucking book, and it isn’t for the faint of heart because it honestly has a little bit of everything--to the point that I couldn’t give it a 5/5 because I did find some points a bit too disturbing.  Not in a gratuitous sense--it was the right choice for the book, just not always for me the reader.  But it is so well-written, and really original, and interesting in a way that so many reincarnation books aren’t.  It goes to some very interesting places, and was incredibly gripping.  For that matter, you get to see a number of different periods of Chinese history, which is always fun to read about.  Highly recommend if you’re looking for something really different.

Because You Love to Hate Me, edited by Ameriie.  3/5.  This anthology--featuring authors like Renee Ahdieh, Marissa Meyer, Susan Dennard, and more--focuses on villains.  Each story is actually a response from the author to a challenge given by a different writer; the challenger follows up the story with an essay, reacting to the story and discussing villainy.  Many of the stories are takes on classic villains--Moriarty from the Sherlock Holmes series, The Little Mermaid’s sea witch, the Erl-King/Queen--while a few others are completely original.  As with almost any anthology, this was a bit of a mixed bag.  A few of the stories were really excellent.  “Marigold” was the first thing I’d read from Samantha Shannon, and now I’d really like to see something else from her.  “Jack” was one of the few stories I found actively gruesome, and “Gwen and Art and Lance” was a pleasant, different surprise.  “Indigo and Shade” and “The Sea Witch” were also interesting.  However, a few of the stories weren’t for me just because of their style or content, and a few more seemed to fail at really being... well, about villains.  I felt like I was reading a bit too much about sympathetic villains, you know?  And the essays weren’t really for me--they felt like Tumblr posts.  But with that being said, it was enjoyable, and I think a lot of people would love it.

Final Girls by Riley Sager.  5/5.  At nineteen, Quincy Carpenter survived a massacre at Pine Cottage, during which all of her friends was killed.  As the only survivor, Quincy was immortalized by the press as one of the “Final Girls”, the other two being Lisa Milner and Samantha Boyd, who survived similar such massacres.  Ten years later, Quincy is shocked when Lisa commits suicide, and the mysterious Samantha shows up on her doorstep immediately after.  If you’re a fan of slasher movies, I highly recommend this book, which not only deconstructs the “final girl” archetype but tells a hell of a story.  It shifts between the present and what happened to Quincy on the night she survived, and both stories are equally compelling.  Quincy is a remarkably complex and flawed character, as is Sam--I was enthralled by both.  While I had an inkling about one of the twists, I certainly didn’t predict all of them.  It’s not only a great story, but an important one--while few of us experience traumas as horrible as Quincy’s (thankfully) the way she dealt with hers was very familiar to me, and the Sager does an excellent job of examining the difference between being fine on the surface and being fine in reality.  A must-read.

Every Last Lie by Mary Kubica.  2/5.  Clara, mother to a four-year-old daughter and a newborn boy, has her world shattered when her husband is killed in a car wreck.  What is written off as a tragic accident becomes more complicated when their daughter, Maisie--who was in the car with Nick when he died--insists that her father was being chased by a “bad man”.  Becoming obsessed with what happened to Nick, Clara begins to trace the last few months of her husband’s life--while, in alternating chapters, we see the truth unveiled from Nick’s perspective.  I gave this book two stars instead of one because I do think it portrays grief well--Clara is irrational to the point where she becomes unhinged and obsessive, and this does ring true to me, especially since she’s probably suffering from postpartum depression as well.  But the ending.  UGH.  THE FUCKING ENDING.  It ruined the book for me, as did the fact that we were clearly supposed to sympathize with Nick when he was a complete dirtbag.  Spoiler alert: Nick wasn’t cheating on Clara like you might initially think (he keeps going on and on about her pregnant body, and I was like wait are you into this or are you resentful of it idek) but he was keeping a million things from her.  An ex-girlfriend showing up in his life again, a kid that was possibly fathered by Nick before he met Clara, a malpractice suit, the fact that he’s apparently the worst dentist on Earth and deserved the malpractice suit...  God.  I should have known that I would hate Nick as soon as I realized he was a dentist.  Clara isn’t much better.  She idolizes Nick, jumps from one conclusion to the other over the course of a couple pages, and honestly doesn’t seem to have any kind of life outside her husband and kids.  Drop this, read Final Girls.

Close to Shore by Michael Capuzzo.  3/5.  In 1916, the Jersey Shore experienced a series of shark attacks that would really be the first attacks in American history to capture the public’s imagination.  They remain pretty distinct, as they occurred in a short period (from July 1 to July 12) across both the ocean and a nearby creek, and four people were killed and one injured by what seemed to be a single shark.  I read this in honor of Shark Week and because I’ve always been seriously fascinated by these attacks, ever since I was very young.  Capuzzo does a good job of describing the shark’s potential life and the attacks themselves.  But he also spent a lot of time fleshing out the lives of people who often weren’t even the attack victims themselves but their loved ones, which like.. fine, I’m sure that worked for a lot of people, but I’m here for the attacks.  I also feel like more time should have been spent on discussing theories regarding shark behaviors and what made these attacks so unique--and were they really unique at all?  Capuzzo seemed to be very set on the idea that this was a juvenile great white, that it was attacking for these reasons, etc.  And not all scientists, at least from what I’ve read, agree with him--even a discussion of outlying, unlikely theories would have been nice.  Capuzzo also didn’t seem to explain why he was so set on the great white theory, when a bull shark would be another likely candidate--some would say more likely than a great white, especially during the creek attacks.  With that being said, if you’re interested in the topic it’s a quick read and nicely informative.  To paraphrase Jon Snow, I like the shark bits.

[loveiscosmicsin]

The Final Frontier

Older Glompto/Promptio is a blessing, and yet my heart’s in a drought. Give me lots of content for this ship and those two in their thirties, please and thank you. Ao3 Link

-

“You had me at hello, goodbye and everything in between.” - Shannon L. Alder

-

Prompto Argentum had the perfect plan.

It’s a mission that had constantly been on his mind for the last five weeks. Weeks spent rehearsing in front of Iris, enduring much-needed pep talk from Noctis and Ignis, and kicking nasty thoughts of not being good enough. All that’s left is for him to just go for it. Go big or go home sort of deal, go where no man has gone before: asking Gladiolus Amicitia to tie the knot.

Yet, Prompto got tongue-tied when he felt ready to propose.

The timing was never the issue, Gladiolus’ undivided attention easy to summon for brief periods away from rebuilding Lucis and shadowing the king. Instead of feeling confident after streaming late-night videos of best proposals of all time, Prompto felt a little out of his league. Gladiolus was out of his league. But for whatever reason, they’re been steady for ten years.

There wasn’t any doubt in Prompto’s mind that Gladiolus was the future Mr. Argentum or he himself be Mr. Amicitia. It didn’t matter. The surnames clicked better than what he expected after a moment’s deliberation. Anyone who knew how the Sworn King’s Shield was with words would want him on the spot. Gladiolus always made it look so easy with how he connected to people and it’s not even reflected on the fact that he’s a blue blood. The impressive eagle tattoo and the muscles were something a little extra for Prompto to appreciate.

That’s why if Prompto was to propose to his boyfriend then he’s going to take the grease-monkey goddess’s mantra and do it right. Because they’re practically a little bit married, just needed a ring to go with it.

He may not have a theater troupe to reenact a favorite film or a carriage drawn by a team of glorious chocobos, but Prompto’s heart was in the right place. He was ninety-seven percent positive that Gladiolus wasn’t a fan of outlandish ceremonies. He had to make the moment special, just enough to stun him for a good minute before saying yes.

Prompto met Gladiolus when he was in high school, fifteen and eighteen respectively; Noctis introduced the two of them. The bodyguard definitely fit the bill for intimidating thug more than bodyguard, that was probably the point. The blond thought of him as nothing more than mean-spirited guy who could break cinder blocks with his head without batting an eye, and there were times that that assumption was justified: Gladiolus was a jerk at times. But Prompto had never met a more driven and compassionate man.

Maybe that’s why Prompto was drawn to him and didn’t realize it at first. The livewire was determined to get Gladiolus to crack a smile and laugh at his puns, bad as they were and recycled as they were. (Of all people, Ignis laughed at his jokes long before Gladiolus did, Ignis.) Occasionally, the joking got Prompto in trouble and Gladiolus had always been there to bail him out.

It was probably love somewhere between the lines of that relationship. Maybe it happened when Gladiolus playfully returned the jabs or the day the two laughed to the brink of tears and the older man noticed that the blond had dimples, calling them pretty. Or when Gladiolus suddenly recited poetry word for word and Prompto had no idea what he was saying but listened because he was so pleasant to listen to. This might be reaching, but it had to be that day when he and Noctis showed up at Prompto’s house unannounced, a bloody gash over the Shield’s eye and a startled prince at his side. No, it had to be during the epic road trip where Prompto proved he could carry his own weight and had Gladiolus’ back in battle. Maybe it got more serious when the world got fucked up beyond belief some years later.

Prompto sighed into his hands, blowing exaggerated huffs of air at imaginary crumbs on the counter. Now wasn’t the time to be wistful of the memories. Long story short, they had been through thick and thin, the final chapter to the King of Light’s story recorded for the legends, and the lucky ones got their happy ending, remembering the beloved that helped pave the way to this conclusion. But tales don’t end there, new ones had to be written. This tale had just begun when the blond let it simmer on the back burner of his head. It was what he wanted to do when this was over, only to have recently shared the idea to his friends.

He stared at his palm, a ring crafted of orichalcum with a matte finish, a relic he had picked up during his travels. It wasn’t around any skeleton’s finger and it definitely wasn’t the Ring of the Lucii 2.0 so Prompto can safely declare it safe to wear. Though the thought didn’t occur to him until after the light was restored to the world, it screamed ‘instant noodle-loving, Coleman pack rat bibliophile’ when he found it. Not literally, of course. The size was perfect and it didn’t look like just any conventional wedding ring.

Prompto dropped the ring into a Cup Noodle he just prepared and buried it in the stringy noodles and vegetables. He knew Gladiolus loved to eat them right after a workout. At one point, the big guy admitted that he loved Cup Noodles almost a little more than he loved Prompto. He could hear the wedding bells now.

It was just too bad that someone got to the noodles first.

“Nooooct! Nooooo!” Prompto cried out, lunging to secure the stolen cargo as the hapless Lucian king tilted the cup up, soup and all going down in two gulps.

As crazy he was for thinking it at that moment, Prompto should’ve guarded the Cup Noodle with his life.

“What’s with you?” Noctis demanded as he leaped back, dropping the Cup Noodle.

It was all in vain. The bottom of the container was empty. The soft, merry harmony of wedding bells that had went through the gunslinger’s head became a jarring cacophony of cymbals being repeatedly clashed together by a band of not-so-talented goblins.

Prompto wanted to tear his hair out, but decided against it remembering who his biological father was. He would like to keep a full head of hair for as long as he could, not go bald early. “The ring was in that!”

Noctis went pale as a sheet, clutching his stomach. It didn’t take him long to figure out what ring he spoke of. “You got to be kidding me!”

“You didn’t feel that going down? At all?”

The king balled up his shirt, looking unwell. “No.”

Instead of throwing an obscene comment accusing Noctis of swallowing things bigger than rings, Prompto defeatedly threw himself on the counter. “I can’t believe you ate the ring, man.”

“Ate what?”

Gladiolus entered the kitchen with a towel draped over his neck, shirtless and glowing radiantly from post-exercise. The blond’s jaw would be on the floor at the sight if he wasn’t so wired from the fact the ring was in his best friend’s stomach.

“The noodles!” Prompto yelped, his voice cracking as he trashed the evidence. “That I made for you!”

“That’s pretty generous of you, but I was thinking over what you said about eating healthy.” Gladiolus announced as he walked straight for the refrigerator. He pulled out a plastic container. “I’m gonna stick with a kupoberry salad for lunch.”

“Yeah? That’s great, honey boo bear because I care about you staying healthy.” Prompto patted his boyfriend’s rear with a grimace though the professed sentiment didn’t come close to matching his inner thoughts:

Whaddaya mean you’re going healthy now? You just gotta throw a curve ball at me, don’t cha? Why today of all days you decided to listen to me? At any rate, it doesn’t even matter. Big guy could’ve swallowed that ring or dumped it down the drain.

Prompto forced a laugh and as if there was any way that Gladiolus had overheard his inner monologue, he added, “Love you.” He winced, despising how weak that sounded aloud.

Gladiolus raised an eyebrow at this, reaching out to touch the shorter man’s forehead before laying a big smooch on it. “Love you, too. Catch you later.” He shook the salad in a sort of inconspicuous farewell to the king and Noctis meekly waved back.

Once Gladiolus was out of earshot, Prompto gave the finger guns and clicked his tongue, “Start gagging.”

Noctis crossed his arms with a scowl. “Prompto, I can’t just throw up on cue.”

“Noct, I love you, man.” Prompto, undeterred and unsatisfied by that answer, laid his hands on the king’s shoulders. “You’re the greatest buddy in the whole universe and I couldn’t have picked a better best man, but that ring is coming out of you, one way or another.” He pointed to a package of bran muffins. Fiber always got the job done and best friends don’t stick fingers in each other’s mouths, induced vomiting’s just a little too far. “Eat these.”

Be it that maybe Prompto was ten years early or ten years too late, he needed to hear it from Gladiolus’ lips. Some part of him is relieved that he could delay the proposal a little longer.

“Anything for you, I guess,” Noctis sighed, taking a bite out of a muffin with disinterest. That piece fell out of his mouth. “Ugh, stale. You know, you went about this all wrong. Said 'today’s the day I’m gonna spill my guts to the majestic eagle guy’.” He picked up a muffin and threw it at the blond’s shoulder. “'Noct, can you do it for me? The words aren’t coming out.’”

“I don’t say say that.”

Noctis gave him a stern look.

“Okay, okay, once that ring’s out, then I’m going to propose. For realsies this time.”

Obviously, the anxious gunslinger couldn’t follow Noctis all day, they both had other things to take care of. Lucis couldn’t stabilize all on its own and the king left after choking down four muffins. Besides, Noctis promised to let the blond know when the ring would be ready. Well, that was long before he set his phone off to silent and Prompto’s calls had to go to voicemail. That was criminal. Still, there are other ways around this, a second assurance.

“I came as soon as I could. What’s the emergency?”

Prompto may had told a tiny fib to get Ignis to come over. He felt a little guilty for that.

Before the prince consort could remove his jacket, Prompto took his hand and laid a box of sandwich bags on it.

“Iggy, when Noct poops, you go in there and scoop it up in one of these and call me ASAP.”

Ignis weighed the box of bags, running the clear packaging between his fingers with an undecipherable expression and gave the blond a sarcastic, “Ah-ha.”

“Please, Iggy,” the blond clapped his hands over his head, knowing that the gesture would fall short in the blind man’s range of perception. “I’m begging you.”

“I fail to understand the nature of this request,” Ignis deadpanned, “though I doubt your explanation or Noct’s would prove worthwhile.”

Prompto made a noise of discontent.

The corners of the prince’s lips curled in amusement. “But if you were this forthright with Gladio, I’m most certain he would appreciate it.”

The blond gasped. “The all-knowing daemon strikes again.” Whatever excuse he had to gain Ignis’ attention, it wasn’t anywhere related to the proposal and Noctis hadn’t been with him since this morning. Ignis had eyes and ears where they shouldn’t be other than on his body, but he knew everything going on.

Ignis frowned at the nickname received about a seventh sense that emerged from his blindness. “Enough of that. I receive plenty provocation from my husband. This is your future at stake here, Prompto.”

“Thanks for your blessings all-knowing one.” Prompto whispered, hoping he wouldn’t be heard as the older man had his back to him. “Don’t poison our water supply, burn our crops, and deliver a plague onto this house.”

Ignis flicked him across the forehead. “I heard that.”

-

“What? You’re leaving?” Prompto bolted upright from his comfortable position on Gladiolus’ chest. He immediately regretted it when he saw the room spin.

Gladiolus nodded, stroking the blond’s shoulder. “Gave you a heads-up three weeks ago, remember? You’re the first person I told.”

Prompto searched the older man’s face in silence.

The Shield chuckled. “You don’t remember, huh?” He held out a finger inches away from the blond’s nose. “You’re giving me that same look you made three weeks ago.”

“Does a behemoth ever forget?” Gladiolus opened his mouth and Prompto interjected, “No, no, they don’t do there. I didn’t forget.” He scoffed, “Pfft. But refresh my memory where you’re going and how long again?”

As Gladiolus explained, suddenly all the words became white noise and it would’ve been the perfect opportunity for major ad-libbing, Prompto’s mind drifted off to a whole separate train of thought:

Ohhh… That’s why Ignis had me try on clothes and brought like five outfits. Knew they were a little too fancy for casual wear. Still can’t get over how that man has a great sense of fashion no matter what. Did Gladio tell him what we’re doing just so I can be reminded?

“So,” Gladiolus broke Prompto out of his thoughts and none the wiser of how he spaced out completely, “are we still good for dinner tonight? Like I said, I head out pretty early.”

“Yeah, sounds perfect, big guy.” Prompto grinned, patting his boyfriend’s hand. Or it would’ve been if he had the damn ring on him! All the more reason to get it as soon as possible.

-

“It’s been six hours and you still don’t feel you gotta go?” Prompto exclaimed once he finally cornered the wayward king.

“And whatever you told Ignis earlier made my life harder.” Noctis sighed, putting his hands on his hips. “Surprisingly, he can’t be deterred from the false calls you pulled. He wants results.”

“I know, I know!” Frustrated, the plucky blond threw his hands up. “But without the ring, this would be a bust.”

“Better think of something. Gladio’s going to be gone for a month.”

“A month?” Prompto was desperate, but not before an idea hit him. “What if I just cut you open?” Noctis was stupefied by the suggestion so the other man added sternly, “If you love us, man, you would do this.”

“Surgery?” The king was flabbergasted. “L-look, just let buy you a new one…”

“That’s not the same!” The blond rubbed his chin, eying the king’s midsection. “I knew that watching the medical dramas would come in handy one day. You won’t feel a thing. Probably.”

“You’re not performing surgery of any kind.” Noctis narrowed his eyes. “Why couldn’t you just slip the ring in a book and give that to him?”

“Um, dude, that’s like how you proposed to Iggy. Learned Braille in secret and wrote the question out yourself. It’ll be copying if I did something like that.”

“Wouldn’t be the first time.”

“Rude. At least one of us don’t got a ring in his belly. That’s new.”

The king rubbed his forehead into his palm. “Are you sure you put the ring in those noodles?”

“Yeah, and that’s how we got here.”

“Fine,” Noctis sighed, shaking his head. “But I’ll do anything, but not surgery.” He added immediately before Prompto pressed further.

-

“So when I asked if we’re good for dinner, I thought it’ll be just the two of us. Uh, no offense, Your Majesties.”

“Pardon the intrusion on your soirée,” Ignis elegantly swirled a glass of white wine between his fingers. “We thought this would be a more fitting get-together before sending you off.”

“Don’t mind me.” Noctis poked at his plate in annoyance. “Prompto won me over with a free meal… by candle light. Real romantic.”

“Is there a reason why you’re not touching your food?” Gladiolus asked.

“I had a big lunch.” The king replied, cheekily, shoving vegetables into a cloth napkin.

“Right.”

Gladiolus had made reservations at a high-end restaurant. Prompto made it a condition that Noctis be present while Ignis wished to be a spectator to the grand proposal. At a compromise and invitation, it was a double date. Everyone was dressed in their finest tonight.

Prompto barely tasted his food and water did nothing to save his parched throat. He didn’t want to risk touching Gladiolus with clammy hands. “I got something really important to ask you and it can’t wait until you get back.” After receiving subtle nods from Noctis and Ignis, Prompto took a knee, albeit rather slowly, his foot was trapped around a leg of his chair. He wiped his hands down. “Gladiolus Amicitia, will you marry me? Come on, crown citizens, let me hear you! Tap your glasses in the name of love!”

Ignis commenced with the polite chinking of glass tapping before the patrons of the establishment joined in. He turned his head when Noctis didn’t join right away and the king groaned.

“Wow, I wonder if I was this obnoxious before proposing to Ignis.” He said under his breath.

“You knighted your husband Gentleman of the Bedchamber before crowning him as the prince so shush!” Prompto sniped in a hushed whisper.

“I’d appreciate if everyone forgot that time.” Ignis protested calmly, voicing his dissent in the word choice. “Or choose not to mention it in my presence.” The tapping of glasses ended and the entire room waited on bated breath.

In all the commotion, Prompto realized that he was forgetting something. He laid his hand on the king’s stomach from beneath the table. Noctis gave him a look, but it wasn’t any less uncomfortable for Prompto either. It gave him some comfort in knowing where the ring was. This was more for Prompto’s belief in luck and reassurance that this would be nothing less of perfection.

“I don’t have the ring on me,” Prompto admitted in a half-truth to the Shield. Technically, it was in someone. “But trust me, it’s nearby and I’m pretty serious about this. About you.” He clutched the front of Noctis’ suit tighter and prayed. “About us.”

Gladiolus grinned. “Yeah, I’ll marry you.”

“What? Just like that?” Prompto lowered his hand. “Did someone rat me out?”

“Nah, ever since you asked me where we’re meeting in the afterlife, figured you’re gonna pop the question eventually.”

“At the ice-cold pool of Jetty’s right next to the chocobo farm! You do remember!”

“We ain’t dead yet so don’t try going before me.” Gladiolus rolled his eyes, but Prompto wasn’t fazed by it, not when the Shield’s grin was the brightest he’s ever seen. “I love how you purposely sing off-key in the shower. I love that you pour cereal while wearing one of my favorite jerseys. I love how your smile’s liquid sunshine even when the weather’s shit. And nothing’s sweeter than that look you get on your face when you gotta show me a cute animal you caught on film.”

Prompto’s stomach had performed a hundred somersaults and at least a dozen backflips by now. “Oh em gee.” His eyes were starting to water, yet he couldn’t avert his gaze, smirking endlessly like a fool in love.

“I love you even more when you say things like that.” Gladiolus fondly stroked the blond’s goatee. “When I’m not feeling by best, you boil the best ramen and we eat straight from the pot. Where I’m getting at is… Yeah, I love you and I want the rest of my life to be with you.”

Prompto reached up and weaved the Shield’s loose ponytail between his fingers. “H-hey, I’m supposed to be the one proposing here. You’re stealing my thunder.”

Gladiolus inched closer until their foreheads were touching. “Needed to set the record straight,” he whispered huskily. “Before we get hitched.”

When they kissed, whatever doubts he had before, it was the perfect marriage proposal in Prompto’s mind. Applause went off like fireworks. If he wasn’t on the floor, his right foot would be raised just like in the rom-coms.

“Was that perfect or what?” Prompto was beaming from ear to ear as he waltzed to Noctis’ side as his fiancé and the prince consort made way towards coat check.

Noctis was walking exceedingly slower than usual. “I’ll give you that…”

“Hey, what’s wrong?”

“Need to head to the restroom… right now.”

“The ring’s coming? We’re having the ring today?” Prompto cupped the king’s stomach. What timing. “Hey, big guy, Ignister, we’ll be back.”

Gladiolus nodded, waving a hand that bore a ring fashioned from the foil of after-dinner mints, a temporary accessory until the real ring could be procured, before the older man turned his attention back to the counter. Ignis called the ring charming and vintage, praising the ring maker. It still made Prompto giddy with joy as he pointed it out to a random couple in passing:

“That’s my fiancé.”

And once more to every guest, employee, stuffed animal, and inanimate object along the way for good measure. He was certain to indicate where said fiancé was even when he had to squint, turn his head, and visually and physically lead them there.

“What are you doing?” Noctis’ face was flushed, ducking away before people got a good look of his face. “I don’t need you in there!”

“Of course I’m coming in with you! You’re having Gladio’s ring. I can’t miss that for the world.” The plucky blond threw his arm around the king’s shoulders. “You know, Noct, this is the best day of my life. Scratch that, I mean, I still have other milestones to look forward to like being a dad. Maybe. Still gotta talk to my future hubby about that. And uh, launching my own magazine, but I’ll get there eventually. I’m not rushing this at all.”

-

“So that’s what you meant when you said it was nearby.”

“But I promise you I washed, steam-cleaned, and polished it a good thousand times before giving it to you.”

The Shield chuckled, watching the band glimmer in the light. “Well, I’m always on Noct’s ass.”

“And now you got a bit of him around your finger.”

Gladiolus gave Prompto a hard look, one that spoke of how unimpressed he had to learn of this a year later.

“Right. That was bad, but think of it this way: not everyone can say their wedding ring was blessed by the King of Light. I mean, once it finally cruised through the digestive system and he pushed it out, it still counts. We couldn’t been happier. Right?”

“Ask me again in another ten years.”

“Gladioooo!”

[datingadviceonreddit]

I could really use some outside perspective on this. So I [28 m] was in a relationship with with a 42 year old woman - she has 2 kids, is divorced, and let's call her Shannon - and am not sure if she's just manipulative or I'm an asshole for real. Just fyi I'm a virgin.We started texting last February, and quickly realized we had a lot of things in common and conversations were really great. Eventually we started discussing more intimate things, and although we couldn't physically hang out - I was finishing my BS in NY, and she lived in my home state of TX - we texted every day. One of those days she asked me what my parents would think if we dated. My reply was that they wouldn't care, which was true - because when I went back that May after graduation I told them I was seeing her. I didn't think I had anything to hide, and I stood behind my decision.Anyway, back to February, after a few days after she asked about dating, she told me that she had had an abortion back in September of '17. She told me that her ex was abusive and an addict and that when she got pregnant he made her get the abortion. She had been struggling with depression ever since and that I was the only person, beside the friend who took her to the clinic, who she had felt comfortable/safe enough to tell. I was shocked, but felt so much for her that I tried to be as supportive and loving as I could. It made me really consider our relationship and what I thought about her. After thinking on it I came to the conclusion that I still had feelings for her, and she wasn't any less of a good person or somehow unworthy or dirty. It was a decision I didn't make lightly, because I can only imagine how hard that must be on a woman, and if I continued the relationship I couldn't half ass it; that if I was in, I had to be in 100%. So we continued talking and I kept on trying to build her up. Eventually she said we should hang out at her place for spring break and we could "play" cause her daughters were going to be with their dad. I immediately agreed and used some of my school loan to buy a plane ticket.The time came for spring break and I went back to TX, excited and nervous all at the same time because I hadn't told her I was a virgin. Well the week in TX came and went and all of a sudden she went MIA. I texted her to see if she still wanted to hang out at her place, and got no reply. I was really crushed, not only because of we were going to "play", but because I really wanted to be with her in person. I started to get in my head and I figured she had decided I wasn't good enough because why would she would want to be with me - she's a really great looking woman, and a great person, she could have anyone she wants. So when Friday came, I decided to text her to tell her that although I was sad we hadn't met up, I understood that she had decided she didn't want to be with me, and that after all the honesty she had with me, I had to come clean and tell her I was a virgin and that she deserved for me to have the balls to be equally honest. I realize amd abortion and virginity are not equal, but I had never mustered up the courage to tell someone, much less someone I was romantically interested in. I wished her and her girls all the best and I would completely understand if she didn't want to talk anymore.Days went by, and I had not heard back from her, which I kind of expected, why would she want to be with a 28 year old virgin still finishing his bachelor's degree. Once I got back to NY, I started getting ready to go back to classes the next day, and she texted me. She said she was sorry that she had been with her family and her phone fell in water the Wednesday before, and that she finally read my text and it made her cry. She told me that there was nothing wrong with me, that she was sorry she couldn't communicate with me and that she hadn't been able to get away from her family, and that she wamted to pursueour relationship. I was thoroughly shocked. That was not what I was expecting at all. So we continued texting. I decided to trust her. For the rest of the semester we kept on talking and shared our account passwords to be able to watch movies and tv shows together, in a way.Graduation came and then it was time for me to go back to TX and find a job. Before all of this I had planned on staying in NY and do everything possible to get a job there. When I got back we made plans to meet up again, but this time just to be with each other because she wasn't feeling well, and her daughter would be home. I agreed, I really wanted to see her and be with her. We did hang out, I met her youngest daughter and she hung out with us for a bit watching a movie. While watching the movie we were next to each other and got closer; to the point where she rested her head on my chest/shoulder and I put my are around her. Her daughter left a few minutes into the movie and we kept watching TV till late at night. I ended up staying over and sleeping on her couch. The next morning we woke up and watched some tv - the royal wedding was on - and I eventually took off.We texted every day and her health got worse, she had already been feeling ill and by a week later she ended up going to an urgent clinic. We made plans to hang out for her birthday but she ended up going to the hospital, turns out she had sepsis. She recovered, but her doctors recommended she have a couple of check ups in the months following to make sure her organs healed up. During this time she ended up having to take all kinds of meds for her heart and antibiotics till she was in the clearWe hung out one more day, but her ex's step mom was there because they were supposed to travel to Alaska for a couple of weeks so that they could visit with the girl's grandparents. She told me to tell her ex's step mom we had met in class at the University of Houston, and that it how we knew each other. I agreed and when we met up at her place we cuddled and watched movies. By the time it was time for me to go, she asked me if I would stay at her place while they were gone so I could watch her cats, get her mail, and also so I could get some space from staying with my parents. I agreed, and the day they were to fly out came and I arrived at her place. They were already gone, but that was expected. She told me they were leaving at noon so they could check in to a hotel near the airport. When I got there I got settled in, but I ended up getting a call from her around 10-12; she was crying and said that her ex's step mom had started drinking and that she was getting abusive. She asked me to please go pick her and her youngest daughter up. So I did. When I pciked her up she was bawling. She was like "babe that was awful" and we hugged. I hadn't thought about it before but her oldest daughter - who was 16 - had decided she was still going to go. Or at least not come with us. Her 16 year old ended up not going. But when we got back she told me that she couldn't go to a place so far away where she would be isolated from everything and that if her ex's step mom would get belligerently drunk she would have nowhere to go; she didn't want to be stranded.Well when we got back to her place we stayed up cuddled up in her couch watching tv.I left the next morning and we kept on talking. Around the first week of July she asked me if I could please go with her and her youngest daughter to a slime convention, her daughter really wanted to go and she was feeling anxious. I agree and she booked us a hotel. The plan was for me to go and hang out and "play" the Friday before the convention and I could stay over and drive us on Saturday to Dallas.When I got there on Friday she was a bit tipsy, but I can't judge, I mean although I don't skip work or miss out on any of my responsibilities, I do drink quite a bit. She described herself as a lush, and I in my opinion that was something else we had in common. Her daughters were both home, and she had rearranged her living room so that the couch was on the wall between her oldest daughter's room and the living room, and her youngest daughter's room, which is adjacent to her room and only separated by a door with glasses, had the doors wide open. Her daughter's room leads into her room. Anyway we were hanging out having a good time and her 12 year old said she was hungry, I hadn't drank at all and felt I could have some beer said I would get her a bugger and a milkshake and after we could pick up some beer and wine cause she was out. We went and I got the food for her kid, and two bottles of wine and a six pack. I thought two bottles was a bit much but thought hey if I finish my six pack I can get some wine. So I paid for it. When we got back home we started drinking a bit and talking and her 12 year old showed me her wiccan stone on a string. She asked me to ask it questions so I played along, and asked some questions. She told me the answers and what not. She was having fun so everyone was happy. Eventually her mom and I started talking about music and our favorite songs so her kid left. I got up for a beer, and somehow the subject came up and she said that I wasn't going to be losing my virginity that night so I shouldn't expect sex. I was alright with that so we kept to chilling and we kept on having a great time, her legs over my lap and just kidding around. Eventually when we got really close I decided to spoon her. She said "we're not having sex", which was totally ok. I decided I wasn't going to push it to sex, but I wanted to caress her. I was really turned on, and my hands were rubbing her legs and thighs. Btw she was wearing really short and tight shorts, and she unbuttoned them after a while. We spent several hours talking and listening to music and cuddling. She went through a whole bottle of wine and started on the second. She eventually grabbed my hand and put it on her abdomen. My immediate thought was to put my hand down her pants, but then I saw the door open and she said she didn't want sex, so I didn't. Which was fortunate cause her 12 year burst in pissed off because the music was too loud and it was 2 am. I immediately took away my hand and we both started laughing cause she was so mad and we almost got caught. I didn't think it was a big deal, by 3 am she said let's have sex. I was like alright, but I knew there was no way her kids wouldn't find us. She then thought about it and realized we had no privacy. So we kept on cuddling and talking in the couch in the living room and her 17 year old yelled, that she wanted to go to sleep and that she could hear everything. So Shannon yelled at her, and then got up and stormed into her room yelling and really aggressive. She shut the door behind her and from I heard was her daughter screaming cause Shannon was pulling her hair, threw her cellphone at her kid's head, and told her she had to call her dad right then to pick her up and take her away; the 16 year old was gonna be spending the weekend alone for the first time that weekend . Her daughter was crying and I thought about going in the room and bring her out. Then I thought I'm a latino with a DUI on my record, and god forbid this woman turns on me and I have to subdue her without hitting her, and someone calls the cops. I would have been fucked. So I stayed out of it, against my better sense. After about 5 minutes Shannon came back and we sat back down on the couch. When I thought she had calmed down? She got back up again and went back into the kid's room this time though I was ready and followed her in before she could close the door. She was all kinds of pissed off, I could sympathize with the kids, they wanted to go to sleep, they're kids. This time I grabbed her by the hand and pulled her back a bit. She kept on yelling at her daughter, and I told her this wasn't necessary, to please come with me. She budged and I told her daughter I was so sorry. So I took her back to the living room and argued a bit. She said I was playing devil's advocate for saying we should head to bed. She said her daughters have so many freedoms and she allows them to do a lot at her own life. She then started yelling "I'm not scared of you", to her daughter. I told her it wasn't necessary, that her kid was probably more scared of her. I grew up in a house with parents who would hit you, but this wasn't discipline.She quit yelling and told me to lay back down on the couch, which I was amenable to, that's what we were doing, and she would calm down. We got back to cuddling and this time i put botb my arms around her and held her. She asked me if I was going to leave her and I told her no. After a bit we got up and she grabbed my hand and we went to her room. We slept together and at some point she took her shirt off along with her bra, and grabbed my hand and put it to her heart and told me she loved me. The next morning I got her breakfast, and drove us to Dallas.When we got to the hotel room there was only one bed. I was expecting two so we could sleep together, And her kid could sleep on the other. When I saw that I didn't push it and slept on the couch. My thought was that it would be inappropriate for me to sleep on the same bed with them, and that the weekend was really about her slime convention. So I stepped aside. I was completely beat, I had gotten up at 8 am to get her breakfast, and tend to her hangover. I cleaned up after she finished eating, let her recover. I wanted to make sure we weren't going to be late to sign in, cause there was a deadline, and it wasn't about to be my fault we didn't make it.We made it in time, and to be honest with you I was running low on money. I was actively looking for work and hadn't found anything and I was using the last of my money from working at school. The next morning we got up early and started the day, I was still beat from sleeping on the couch, having only 5 hours of sleep, drinking the night before, and driving 4 hours straight. After the convention I picked them up and started driving back. About 30 minutes in I asked her if she could take the wheel cause I was falling asleep. She agreed, but there was definitely shift in her mood. We ended up not going back to her place, and she dropped me off at my parent's house.We kept texting, the following days, but there was definitely a distance. By Friday say told me she told me it wasn't me and it was her. I told her it broke my heart but ok.I started drinking really heavily now, and sent her a text saying "maybe in another life" in reference to 11.22.63, a show we were watching.On the weekend she texted me back and said she wasn't going to be part of any pitty party. I'm not sure but she seemed like she had been drinking. At this point I had already started drinking really heavily, and was high on pot, and just had broken down in front of my dad. I told her I had not been doing well, and had just had an intense talk with my dad. She started getting more aggressive, and it culminated in her telling me that at least her ex would clean up her house, and was useful. She said that her ex husband made over 300k a year. I told her I had been there for her, that when I got a job I had every intention of providing for her and the kids. She told me she didn't need anyone to be there for her. She told me I was an amateur. And I told her she uses people. I felt like I had been had, and even she had told me stories of a friend she'd known her whole life whom she used, and that she had been kinder to me in the time we knew each other than in a lifetime to this guy. So I told her she uses people, and she said I was an asshole for saying that, and that I was no longer welcome. She proceeded to block me on Facebook, and my numberAfter a couple of days I decided to remove her from my Hulu. I didn't see the need to keep providing that after she had banished me from her life and contacting her.I emailed her one last time after drinking a few 40s. She replied that I was cruel like many other men in her life, and to never contact her again.The cruel, reference comes from a discussion we had about her ex husband taking his latest gf's car away after breaking up with her, even though he owned it. Now I question whether I am really cruel and asshole or if she's just manipulative. via /r/dating_advice

[lovelyparanormalbooks]

Book Blitz: Grand Finale: Crossing in Time by D.L. Orton (Giveaway)

On Tour with Prism Book Tours.

Book Tour Grand Finale for

Crossing in Time

By D.L. Orton

We hope you enjoyed the tour! If you missed any of the stops, go back and

check them out and grab ebook copies of the series on SALE while you can...

Launch - Note from the Author

Love is the most powerful force known to mankind. It wrecks kings, destroys barriers, makes us risk everything for a few stolen moments. . . . And all of this makes for a great story.

Reading for the Stars and Moon - What are your favorite sci-fi books and movies?

I can never seem to remember book titles, and I struggle to recall all the plot twists, but the good characters stick with you. They teach you, change you, become a part of you. I aspire to that with my own writing.

Stormy Nights Reviewing & Bloggin' - Crossing In Time (Excerpt #1)

The chubby gun trader shifts his weight and looks up at me, one eye squeezed shut. “What sort of rearm you lookin’ to purchase, ma’am?” He’s enthroned on a maroon chintz armchair in front of a burned-out Walmart. “Handgun,” I say. “Something easy to aim and shoot.”

Hearts & Scribbles - Ask the Characters: How Difficult Is It to Be a Character in D.L. Orton’s Book?

Isabel: There were times when I wasn't sure I wanted to trust a writer with my life. Still, Ms. Orton cares about the same things I do, and I’m dying to see how things turn out. In the end, I wasn't keen on some of the scarier scenes (and I'm still sad about all those animals), but the author assures me that everything will work out in the end. Right, Diego?

I Love Books - The Journey Is the Reward

What's the moral of the story? Don't take the ones you love for granted. They could disappear at any moment—and time machines are pretty hard to come by. Put your arms around someone you care about and just enjoy the moment. The journey is the reward.

Rockin' Book Reviews - Review

"This is a steadily progressing story of love gone awry, reconciliation, commitment, sacrifice for love and mankind, and time travel. The novel begins with a “interest-catching Prologue, then quickly begins to formulate the story on a solid foundation, constantly building in momentum until it ends in a solid climax, leaving the reader anxious for the next sequel in the story! It is complete with romance, suspense, adventure and life’s lessons."

Kindle and Me - Review

"If you like other universes with the same people, nuclear bombs, physics, emergency preparedness, giving up your life for someone you love, dogs, cats, jokes, finding that one special person, biodomes, peeing on a handkerchief with smoke everywhere, and maybe a way to save us all from our mistakes then this might be for you!"

Wishful Endings - Crossing In Time (Excerpt #2)

“Still...” The gun trader waits for me to meet his eyes. “I s’pose I could use some fancy flavorings on my venison.” I regard the only overweight man in a sea of famine, disgusted with the whole human race and embarrassed by my own full stomach.

Zerina Blossom's Books - Author Interview

Is anything in your book based on real life experiences or is it purely all imagination? Who hasn’t looked back at a turning point in his or her life and wondered how things might have played out differently? I met and fell in love with the man I’m married to when we were twenty-eight, and one of the first trips we took together was to attend the wedding of his best buddy from college. At the reception, I ended up seated next to my husband’s ex-girlfriend! Despite an awkward introduction, she and I hit if off, and we ended up comparing notes. (You should have seen his face when he realized we were talking about him.) At the end of the evening, she said something that stuck with me: I wish I would have met him at a different time in my life.

Celticlady's Reviews - How Does Time Travel Work in the Between Two Evils Multiverse?

Take a shower curtain, some ants, and a bowling ball. Start with the shower curtain. It’s a two-dimensional object in a 3-dimensional world. Imagine, now, that you are an ant, walking, talking, and shagging other ants on this thin, flexible membrane (or a "brane" in physics-speak). Layered above and below you are a million other shower curtains, all of them with their own allotment of ants (some of which get paid 78 cents on the dollar due to slight differences in their copulatory organs).

deal sharing aunt - Review

"I enjoy a good time travel and that is what this book is. It has a great romance and a second chance at love. I enjoyed the world the author created and thought that the author did a great job traveling in time."

Colorimetry - Lost Time (Excerpt #1)

I lie in the greenish half-light, my lungs on fire, panic forcing out any rational thought. And then I remember where I am—or rather where I should be. I pound my fists against the translucent coffin lid until I manage to hit the release lever. The top pops open and frigid air rushes in, smelling of damp earth and evergreens. I gasp for breath, my heart pounding. The last thing I remember is a panicked voice shouting to abort the mission. Stop the countdown because…

fuonlyknew - Review

"The beginning swiftly pulls you in. The plot deepens and the characters emerge. And as you draw near to the conclusion, you’re gripped in a vise of suspense that brings tears to your eyes, fearing and hoping for what comes last."

Angels With Attitude Book Reviews - Dead Time (Excerpt #1)

I’m trying to be brave, Mom, but it’s harder than I thought. All the jeeps and other equipment are gone now, and I count four dingy biosuits slogging toward me through the downpour. I gaze up at the sloped wall of the massive biodome, wishing it didn’t look so… alien. What would Madders do? He’d be collecting data, not blubbering like a D-2 who fell off a swing and scraped her knee. Identify the problem, engineer a solution, and Bob’s your uncle.

Bookworm Lisa - Review

"The book involves time travel, an orb with a message, seashells, love, and secret government projects. It is a fascinating book."

Booklove - Review

"The book, Crossing In Time was a one sit read for me with intriguing and captivating characters, unique, thrilling and original plot and a hooking prose . A perfect read for every Sci-Fi and romance lover."

And don't forget to enter the giveaway, if you haven't already...

Crossing in Time

(Between Two Evils #1) D.L. Orton

Adult Sci-Fi Romance, Dystopian

Hardcover, Paperback, Audiobook & ebook, 374 pages

April 7th 2015 by Rocky Mountain Press

A Publishers Weekly Starred Review

“Best Sci-Fi Love Story of the Year” Remember How It Feels to Fall in Love? Race against the clock through a dystopian nightmare. Climb naked into an untested time machine (carrying only a seashell and a promise). Wake up twenty years younger on a tropical beach, buck naked and mortally wounded, with your heart in your throat. This is a journey of love, loss, and redemption that will make your pulse gallop and your palms sweat, have you laughing out loud through your tears, and leave you flush with the sublime pleasure of falling in love.

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Other Books in the Series

Lost Time

(Between Two Evils #2) D.L. Orton

Adult Sci-Fi Romance, Dystopian

Hardcover, Paperback & ebook, 222 pages

July 1st 2016 by Rocky Mountain Press

If someone took everything you live for, how far would you go to get it back? When a faulty time machine deposits Diego at the top of a pine tree, he knows he's in the wrong place--but has no idea he's in the wrong time. Naked and shivering in the chilly mountain air, he attempts to climb down, but slips, whacks his head, and falls into oblivion. He wakes up inside a darkened room, crippled and disheartened, and must come to grips with the realization that he is marooned in a bleak alternate future. In this universe, what remains of the human race is trapped inside a handful of aging biodomes. With his mission failed, his world destroyed, and the one woman he loves, dead, he can find no reason to go on living. But Lani, the emotionally scarred doctor who finds him, refuses to let him die, and as Diego heals, their relationship becomes... complicated. He struggles to let go of the past but is unable to get Isabel out of his head--or his heart. Just when it seems he may be able to find some measure of happiness in a world teetering on the edge of extinction... Another note arrives from the future: Isabel is alive--but not for long...

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Dead Time

(Between Two Evils  #3) D.L. Orton

Adult Sci-Fi Romance, Dystopian

Paperback & ebook, 414 pages

April 15th 2017 by Rocky Mountain Press

If someone took everything you live for, how far would you go to get it back? From award-winning author D. L. ORTON comes book three in the Between Two Evils series... Shannon fights to stay alive inside a rogue biodome and discovers something totally unexpected... Peter. Lani is forced into the role of the reluctant heroine but rediscovers her street-kid mojo and sets out to find everything she's lost. Diego receives another dirty sock (and a note) from the poorly aimed fireball express: "The window between universes is closing." If Diego has any hope of getting back to Iz, he must get to the Magic Kingdom and power up the time machine before it's too late. What could possibly go wrong?

Goodreads│Amazon

About the Author

D.L. ORTON is the BEST-SELLING author of the BETWEEN TWO EVILS book series. She lives in the Rocky Mountains where she and her husband are raising three boys, a golden retriever, two Siberian cats, and an extremely long-lived Triops. In her spare time, she's building a time machine so that someone can go back and do the laundry.

Ms. Orton is a graduate of Stanford University's Writers Workshop and a past editor of "Top of the Western Staircase," a literary publication of the University of Colorado at Boulder. The author has a number of short stories published in traditional and online literary magazines, including Literotica, Melusine, Cosmoetica, The Ranfurly Review, and Catalyst Press.

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Tour Giveaway

- 1 winner will receive a $25 Amazon eGift Card (open internationally)

- 1 winner will receive the Between Two Evils series, which includes Crossing in Time, Lost Time, and Dead Time (print if US, Kindle copies if international)

- Ends March 28th

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