#MY BOY IS LOCKED TF IN
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so can we all agree that Steve would be INSANE about nascar
#so fun fact#it first aired in 1960#that was the first DAYTONA race#n in my heart mr.c mentioned it in like passing#like oh! thats cool! that nascar thing is on tv!#n steve happens to be there n he LOCKS tf IN#beginning of the end#no one else particularly cares#soda tries to but he always gets like well... is there anything else??#after theyve made like the 3rd lap#godbless that boy#he doesnt have the attention to watch them make the same lap 100 times#but steve knows like EVERYTHING about EVERY racer#im talking stats even the drivers dont know#when he was younger he wanted to be a driver SO bad#the outsiders#sodapop curtis#steve randle#hes SAT for EVERY race#one time he was doing something#n darry was like if u dont knock it off im gonna let Pony watch sunday morning cartoons instead of the pre-qualies#n steve was so distressed over that he knocked that shit off IMMEDIATELY#ponyboy curtis
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The fact that the whole Dance is centered around a 30-year-old Rhaenyra and a 50-year-old Daemon having beef with some 14-20-year-old nepo babies—including an alcoholic with mommy issues, an autistic pixie girl, an anime villain, and a twink—will never be not funny to me.
C&H set the bar in hell and Rhaenyra still couldn't jump over it 💀
I mean, no one in Team Green gave a single fuck about any of Rhaenyra or Daemon's children. They were either casualties in the war or minor annoyances for Alicent, Criston, and Otto. The Dragon Seeds were the ones who actually put up a good fight. Fuck, even Bloody Ben who was 11 in F&B, did so much more!
I literally just started laughing like a maniac alone in my room when I thought about this.
#hotd#house of the dragon#targtowers#born to slay but forced to lock in#that's the entire plot—#someone call up Naruto and let him do his talk-no-jutsu for fuck's sake 😭😭😭#it would literally solve everything believe me#my boy would be the perfect therapist for Alicent's children#everytime I come back to this post I start laughing#tf is wrong with me#alicent hightower#aegon ii targaryen#helaena targaryen#aemond targaryen#daeron targaryen#rhaenyra targaryen#daemon targeryan#team green#pro team green#team black
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There's every other love language and then there's kaiser calling you "meine liebe/schatz" love language 😫
#Charming little boy IM GONNA PUNCH YOU GET THE FUCK OFF MY MIND IM SO DONE#michael kaiser#I'll fucking strangle you pretty boy go tf awayyyyyyy😫😫😫😭😭😫😫😭😭#blue lock#blue lock manga#kaiser michael#BLLK#bllk manga#Ranting#blue lock kaiser#blue lock fluff#blue lock x reader#michael kaiser x reader#Masterlist#Don't mind me just simping
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this is why i’m choosing the bear….
#you see him shitting like this while hiking wyd#my boy GRIPPING that tree god bless#he’s locked tf in head down and everything#outlast#the outlast trials#outlast fandom#leland coyle
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One thing about Yusuke urameshi.
He’s going to have that shit on.
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DUA AND CALLUM ENGAGED?!??????
#scribblesbyc#I'm devastated but she's so real for that because I'd lock him off QUICKLY too#I'm happy for yooouu I guess 😭#(I can't believe my bestest boy is engaged to Dula Peep?!) I'm literally gonna kms. I'm not joking. You'll find me swinging ong#Until I see a ring I ain't believing SHIT#They've been dating for like just over a year? There ain't no fucking way😭 How long did he date Vanessa for??!!??!#PLEASE as soon as I see confirmation I'm crashing tf out. Just forewarning#If I was gonna lose him to anyone I'm okay with it being Dula Peep I gotta say#BUT STILL 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭#Like imma cry a thousand tears fr#callum turner#like imma need a period of mourning deadass
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A feral woman dressed up to the neck in all black rolls up to your door, kicks it down in one fell swoop, and drags you off by the ankles to commit crimes against humanity together. What do you do?
Locke belongs to @krokaxe
#Art with extra fries#Krok: Locke#The Ictus Variable#OC: Christopher#Oh also you've literally never met her before in your whole entire life#my boy Chris getting carried by the scruff of his neck like a wet cat#yes I combined get in loser we're going shopping and get tf up samurai we have a city to burn#It makes the dialogue More Relevant to current events
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Day 1 - Prongsfoot Week 2023
massive thanks to the lovely Jen for organising another wonderful event for us!!! you're the best <3
What are the first 5 things that pop to mind when you think about Prongsfoot?
oooh okay, okay, not as easy as u think, this one. because the only thing that pops into mind when i think about pf is like. cacophonous screaming. incoherence. a teenage fangirl running around a room, arms waving madly, mind lost in the obsession. im uh. a bit unhinged for j&s, if u couldnt tell so far lol. but i'll try.
soulmates. in every world, they're connected to each other and they'll find each other. it's a comforting thought precisely because of how tragic canon j/s is.
unattainable. both of individually, and together, are so far out of most people's leagues its not even funny. they're an intimidatingly attractive couple, and they're almost always in the middle of an inside joke that no one else understands. their friendship is inherently exclusionary and it doesnt bother them at all
affectionate beyond belief. gosh they're a public menace. in any decent society, they'd get locked up for obscenity and 'offending sensibilities' and 'outraging the modesty of people' etc etc bc theyre SO all over each other all the time. its a problem.
jigsaw puzzle. they fit like one, filling in each other's cracks perfectly. at any given time, they're what the other needs, and both consciously and subconsciously at that. seeing them together is a treat bc they're so in sync its almost unreal. even...magical, one could say ;)
larger than life. they're not. a real couple ykno? its not a relationship you'd want in reality, nor does it make sense for that to happen. it's fantastical and amazing and not constrained by practical concerns. u dont have to worry yourself with minor issues bc these two are just. *that* intertwined. i dont know how to explain this one properly haha but just know, they're not a relatable couple nor do they try to be.
#sirius black#james potter#prongsfoot#bambibelle#prongsfootweek2023#i have been. so bad with tumblr and fic and writing these days#i dont even know if i'll be able to do this entire week but by god ill try#someone needs to teach me time management lol#but honestly. any excuse to talk about my two boys is welcome#also: the obscenity thing is mostly a joke#i just find it v funny that outraging the modesty of a woman is an actual legal concept that can get u locked up/fined wtv#like. its the funniest most absurd way to frame harassment/assault/sexual misconduct#also blanked tf out on n. 5 lol like what else do i say bruh#the last point is why im so picky ab my pf#bc the minute u write it like a real life couple im just like eh. not my cup of tea#my fav part of it is how u dont have to worry ab irl concerns w them bc theyre above it all#idk. its just. nice.
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imagine never beating your bro once because he’s a ??? year old vampire whose been chronically obsessed with video games since their invention
#My art#my ocs#malcolm hart#Jason grey#My boy missed so many historical events bc he had a new obsession of the era#Didn’t know the Vietnam war was even really a big deal bc he was locked tf in on Pong
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it literally just hit me that the blue lock project just yoinked all these teen boys from school to a place where they have little to no contact w the outside world and just do soccer all day
#ying speaks#blue lock#like where tf are these dudes learning like calculus???#my boys don’t know how to do derivatives…#i’m pretty sure this is illegal rip#also like how did their parents just let them go????
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that anon was wild ANYWAYS chenford’s gonna have 2 beautiful children and raise them together happily what are we naming them
omg ikr, wasn't that just bizarre? i was like "huh?!" 🤨 like i'm not saying they should start having kids this season cause even i think that's a bit of a far fetched plotline. but anyways i picture them with three kids. two whirlwind little girls, and a super sweet little mama's boy. i came up with a full name for their first daughter when i was writing my pregnancy fic (really lost the fuel to my fire for that though when i accidently deleted my previous main account a couple years ago, idk if i'll ever really get back to that one sadly 😔).
#sylvieschen#answered#chenford#idk if anyone thinks i should change my mind and try to pick up that piece again then hey maybe i will 🫠#but for now that wip is locked away in the back of the file cabinet where my ideas/plots have been slowly rotting away#oh and their girls aren't twins (at least not in my head)#i imagine their girls are a year apart and then they have their little boy maybe like... 2yrs later#i mean if they're gonna drop the bomb in s6 i imagine it'll be a closing scene in one of the finale two episodes#but still why tf you hatin' bruh???? 😂😂😂#btw abby you're tags on my post about getting sobford are mwah 💋✨🤌 magnifique you totally get me#we're gonna break this man down you and me i believe it
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if you guys wont take problematic sirius black then i will
#why do yall flatten him into some babydoll nicotine addicted twink like stop it#having tattoos and smoking cant be a personality sorry#problematic sirius >>> whatever tf the fandom made him into#(SOME of the fandom… some of yall do him well and aren’t obsessed with only his aesthetic)#the boy is a pretty asshole and when i say asshole i dont mean hes sassy he is terrible#hes a terrible person but hes a terrible person WITH character i say#hes got reasons and those reasons will stay locked in my head but hes got reasons#trust me#sirius black#i love him but hate him#marauders#marauders era#harry potter#hp#rewriting#nuh uh
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THE FUCKING WALRUS
#i mean i do kinda wanna redo my blogs but god DAMN i talked a lot of game ab it *kicks myself*#i locked the ambien away for rn Ya Boy clearly needs to ease tf up
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Thinking abt how sad Ortho was to miss out on the equivalent of his first student orientation ceremony with Idia,,,,
#✮┆ ( .ooc. );#//He wanted a Real Boy Experience(tm) with his big bro ;A;#//He was so happy and excited to experience the orientation with him and everything; esp with his sick new suit#//I don’t fault Idia tho; social anxiety is a bitch#//Also whatever tf he and Malleus talked abt; THAT I still need to find#//But still; Ortho blaming himself for Idia getting upset and locking himself away made my heart ache so bad#//My poor son 🥺#//He is just a boy#//Just a lil guy#//Honorable mention to Vil for hearing what Ortho was looking forward to & waiting for Idia with him as long as he could#//Was he a lil catty abt it; yes; but he was so sweet to indulge Ortho & keep him company before he had to go#//I hope he can have a proper ceremony next time; now that he’s a student officially
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CHAOS GOBLINS
I LOVE THE WASHINGTON CAPITALS!!!!!!!!!!!!!! GOOD MORNING GOOD AFTERNOON AND GOODNIGHT BOSTON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! LET'S FUCKING GO
#DOWDER#CHUCCCCCCCC#OH MY GOD WHAT A DEFENSIVE EFFORT#I FUCKING LOVE THIS TEAM#CONNOR MCMICHAEL MY SON MY BABY BOY WAS SO GOD DAMN LOCKED IN DEFENSIVELY#AND ALEX ALEX!!!! ALEXEYEVVVVVVV#THE WAY HE HAS GROWN THIS SEASON#EVERYBODY STEPPED TF UP#LET'S GO#ONE MORE GAME#WE WIN AND WE'RE IN#FUCK PHILLY LET'S FUCKIN TAKE IT TO EM#AHHHHHHHHHH#I'M SO EXCITED#!!!!#GO CAPS GO
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“parenting class” with kei tsukishima
this is part six of my kinktober event :3
word count: 1.5k
warnings: nsfw, timeskip tsukishima, breeding, talks about pregnancy, tsukki is maybe a little bit bad!, finishing inside, unprotected p in v. 18+ mdni!
notes: who tf was gonna tell me pregnancy scares are real
kinktober masterlist | masterlist
kei tsukishima didn’t know what had come over him.
personally, he blamed that stupid parenting class that was required, for some reason. kei thought it was idiotic, but he needed it to graduate. and they absolutely doomed him when they put both of you in class together.
there was something about you, his sweet, beautiful and kind girlfriend that had already won his heart a million times over, doing things that a mom would do. of course, they provided those dumb dolls that cried and stuff—but you seemed to be able to calm the robot baby down instantly. the smallest appearance of a smile came over his face when you’d bounce the doll in your arms, or feed it the fake food.
god forbid when they made you wear that horrible pregnancy vest, because it gave your boyfriend terribly amazing imagery of what you’d actually look like carrying his child. maybe he was weird for it, but after the few weeks of that class was over, kei couldn’t stop himself from only thinking about one thing;
getting you pregnant.
he hadn’t ever been the dad type, until now.
“do you want kids?” tsukishima had asked you, all the while focused on a homework assignment. the question was one you hadn’t talked about before. it took you by surprise, obviously, and you wondered if it was something your tsukki wanted, too.
“if you want them, yeah.”
and that reply is what led kei to his current position, deciding between two ways the both of your lives could go. but as you laid there in his dorm room, trapped under his arms, all the excuses he could make for what he was about to do ran through his head. both of you were adults, set to graduate college in a few months, along with jobs lined up the second you got your diplomas. he already had a ring for you, he’d decided he was going to marry you a long time ago—
what did he have to lose?
“are you okay? you seem out of it, tsukki,” you say, running your fingers through your boyfriend’s blond locks. you had been waiting for a few minutes now, and all kei was doing was staring down at you, the look in his eyes gradually shifting over time.
“mhm.” is the only reply you get out of him, but he finally starts to move his eyes up and down your face, skimming over your lips and soft cheeks. kei felt like he could moan aloud when you wrap your arms behind his neck and lean up to give him a small peck.
he loved how sweet you were to him, a stark contrast in his own personality. he was never one to show affection in many ways, but you made up for it with the amount of affection you gave him. you had kei wrapped around your little finger, and boy, did he know it.
wrapping your legs around his waist, you pull kei in impossibly closer, the warmth in between your legs now was prodded at by the tent in your boyfriend’s boxers. kei harshly sucks air through his teeth at the pressure, absentmindedly rutting against you, feeling your panties and the dampness behind them, absolutely soaked. kei could tell.
“i don’t have a condom,” he remarks, subtly watching how you’d react.
“oh—um, it’s okay,” you reply almost instantaneously, “i’m on birth control, tsukki.”
damn it.
tsukishima nods his head, leaning up to allow space for the both of you to strip away the clothing that was keeping him from being inside of you. scooting back on the bed, you allow him room to join you. kei climbs up on the mattress with you, slotting himself between your already spread thighs, cock immediately pressing against the warm wetness of your cunt. you whine at the teasing, though it isn’t intentional, and kei hushes your noises with a sweet kiss.
as your lips lock and your skin becomes warmer at your lover’s contact, kei’s slender hands come to grab under your thighs, situating you in a rather unexplored position—a mating press. his head draws back again, just to take in the sight of you; in his shirt, and rather everything else completely exposed to him. the small light coming from his desk lamp illuminates you perfectly, shows off how soft you are to kei, the perfect body to carry his kids—
“kei,” you whine, “are you sure you’re okay?” your question is half concern and half desperation, wanting him to either move or tell you he isn’t horny; though, the raging erection he has would say otherwise. “if you don’t wanna do it, we don’t have to—oh!”
your rambling is cut off by a harsh thrust inside, kei wasting no time to completely insert himself into you. he was never one to be too rough, maybe a little erratic, but never completely silent and impatient. you can tell there is no patience left in your boyfriend, with how he immediately begins a grueling, fast pace, slamming his length into you with unrelenting force. your pretty little brain, usually so sweet and composed, has no time to think about what’s got him so worked up, because he has you yelping out within only a few seconds.
“kei—kei!” you chant his name, it’s falling off your lips like a routine prayer, stuck on loop like a broken record.
kei’s knees dig into the fabric of his sheets, his thighs completely straightened, and it feels like he is using every bit of strength to wind his hips up and violently slam them back into you. becoming so fond of this position, you can feel him in new depths, as the slit of his cock taps – no, angrily impales – your cervix. he’s no longer calculated, or sweet, whatever had gotten into kei had made the man completely animalistic.
syrupy, soaked walls clamp around his length ridiculously tighter with every meeting of your hips, and you mewl. the first remnants of sweat creep on your boyfriend’s hairline, his glasses are beginning to slip down his nose, he’s almost silently panting. when your eyes aren’t squeezed shut, you can see the blank, mean expression settled on tsukishima’s features; it wasn’t a softened version of his face like normal.
“feels s’good, tsukki!” you manage to stammer out, arms flailing to the pillow you rested your head on to hold.
“yeah?” followed by a grunt is the only reply, the only words tsukki has given you the entire interaction. he usually liked to tease you, or have more remarks when you babbled on about how good he felt. but no, not now. not when he could feel himself getting closer from the death grip your pussy has on him, not when he can feel himself about to knock you up. “look at me.”
your eyes shoot open, despite the signals from your body telling you to keep them closed, lose yourself in the pleasure. you wouldn’t dare to disobey your boyfriend, not like this. so, of course, you lock your eyes with his, his cock still bullying its way deeper into you. kei savors the scrunched up, dirty look on your face, that of one he hasn’t seen before.
were you enjoying this that much? even if you didn’t know his intentions, were you finding pleasure in the thought of getting pregnant now, by him?
“i’m gonna finish inside,” kei states, and it’s not a request, nor a demand. it’s a simple statement, something he is going to do. you’re able to notice the passion, the need in his voice. and you think, for just a moment, that you understand his intentions.
however, the rough pounding he’s giving you leaves no time for thought.
“mm—finish in me, tsukki,” you motivate him, trying your damnedest to maintain the eye contact with him, “m’gonna cum too!” your voice pitches higher, and kei’s sure whoever’s trying to sleep on the other side of the wall probably hates him right now. but he doesn’t really care, no. he’s determined.
“yeah? close, hmm?” tsukishima teases, finally, in between heavy pants. you nod your head pathetically, not even asking for permission as you clench around him again and cum all over his cock. he’s learned you so well, he can tell when you cum, and he only speeds up the pace of his thrusting to fuck you through it.
at the sound of your pretty noises, kei loses himself, letting the feeling inside snap. thick, white ropes of his cum fly out and stick to your insides, you can feel the extra warmth from it all—it’s hotter than your insides, somehow. even as his pace slows, the thrusts remain just as hard; fucking into you all the way, he’s overstimulating the both of you. all for his greedy, reckless desires.
something had gotten into kei tsukishima, and he knew what it was now. it was all an insatiable, needy scratch inside his brain, only to be helped when in a few weeks, you take that plastic test in the bathroom of his dorm, and those two pink lines show up. he’d only be helped then.
#haikyuu#haikyuu x reader#haikyuu smut#haikyuu x reader smut#kei tsukishima#tsukishima kei#kei tsukishima x reader#tsukishima x reader#kei tsukishima smut
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