#MAKE BELEVING TO BE A BETTER PERSON

[1t-wasnt-m3]

Girl Anachronism by The Dresden Dolls is literally the most Dazai song to ever Dazai

[marvelslut16]

Prank gone wrong

Prompt number: 19 “I can’t do this anymore”

Fandom: It

Paring: Richie Tozier x reader (aged up to 17 or 18)

Rating: T

Word count: 2.6k (this was supposed to be short!)

Warnings: Swearing. Bullying. Mentions of domestic abuse/domestic violence- nothing graphic. asshole Richie. Angst but ends fluffy

A/N: Oof I’ve been gone for ages, I’m sorry guys. But here’s day one of fictober, so hopefully I’ll be able to keep up and this will motivate me to write regularly again. I’m not sure if I love this one or not. I liked the idea when I started and then it took some turns and this is what I ended up with while writing between zoom classes, so sorry if it sucks. I added the second gif cause it’s closer to the age in the story. 

It all started as a stupid prank, a way to get back at Greta for years and years of torture, you never thought it would end in you losing a friend. Just over three months ago Richie agreed to Bev’s plan, take Greta out on a few dates and then publicly humiliate her- give her a taste of her own medicine. But to everyone's surprise, it lasted way longer than a few dates and there was no end in sight. Worst of all it seemed that Richie was actually falling for her- he would defend her any chance he got and even started ditching the losers to spend time with her and her friends. 

It was no surprise to you that Greta fell for Richie, he’s funny, sweet, and he’s aged well. His head has grown into his coke bottle glasses, he still wears hawian shirts but now he has a leather jacket over them constantly- a leather jacket that the two of you picked out together. There is no better than one Richie Tozier, and your feelings are getting harder and harder to deny. Your crush on the trashmouth developed back in middle school- the summer Pennywise reigned terror, but through the years your crush turned into something stronger- by senior year you knew you loved him. Halfway into said school year every loser, besides Richie of course, knew of your feelings for him. The pitied glances they would send your way were almost suffocating. 

Richie is late to lunch yet again, probably making out with Greta in the hallway, so each of you are using this time to talk about the personal hell her and her friends have created for each of you today. You go last, quickly giving them a rundown of your encounter with her in the bathroom, where she threatened you to stay away from ‘her Richie’ and that you would live to regret it if you didn’t. She even ripped one of your textbooks out of your hands, dropping it into the disgusting toilet water- calling you a worthless slut on her way out. 

“Greta is such a bitch!” you complain to your friends, mindlessly pushing around the mush they call lunch at Derry high with the cheap plastic spork they provide. 

“I’d prefer if you didn’t talk about my girlfriend that way,” Richie’s voice is calm and even- lacking the normal excitement and joking lilt to it. Your eyes widen in horror at him having heard you, then they narrow at how genuine his defense of her is. 

“Richie, c’mon, let it go,” Eddie pleads, glancing between your shocked and hurt face and Richie’s angry one. 

“No Eddie, I’m so sick of (Y/N) talking shit about my girlfriend!” you whip around in your seat and look at him in shock. 

“Richie what the hell?” you rise out of your seat so he won’t look down on you literally and figuratively anymore. He cocks his eyebrow, head dropping to the side as he crosses his arms and lets out a huff of annoyance. “Ya know what? I can’t do this anymore!”

“Do what anymore?” Richie doesn’t drop the cocky attitude, making the next words out of your mouth slightly less painful. 

“Be your friend,” there’s a collective gasp from your friends. Richie’s face morphs into shock and sadness for a split second before hardening and sending you another glare. “Not when you’re dating her. She’s changing you Richie!” 

“Greta was right about you, you are a bitch,” your breath catches in your throat and you fight the tears that well up in your eyes. Richie’s glare is unflinching as you stare him in the eye, a tell-tale sign that he doesn’t regret a single word that he said. The murmuring from the table behind you stops the moment the words leave his mouth, they all stare at their friend in shock. 

“Fine, then you’ll never have to deal with this bitch again,” you spin around and grab your backpack and lunch tray. “Fuck you Richard Tozier!” you dump your tray of mush into the trach on your way out of the cafeteria nad away from that stupid boy you somehow fell for. 

“What did you just do?” Stan is the first one to regain the use of his voice, he’s glaring at Richie as the boy takes your recently vacated seat. 

“I’m sick of her attitude towards Greta,” he tries to defend, shocked when all of his friends level him with matching glares. 

“W-wh-what h-ha-ha-happen-ned to th-he pr-pr-prank-k?” Bill’s recently improved stuttering growing worse as he grows anxious at the turn of events between his friends. 

“Greta isn’t the bad one here, we’ve been rude to her all of these years!” Richie once again tries to effectively defend his girlfriend.

“She wrote loser on my cast!” Eddie practically screeches before he goes into an anxiety attack, beleving it’s an asthma attack he takes two puffs from his inhaler.

“Her and her friends dumped wet garbage on me,” Bev adds, quieter than Eddie. 

“That was in middle school,” Richie rolls his eyes, leaning back in his seat. 

“I thought you were in love with (Y/N) before the whole prank, that you did it to get over her,” Eddie says slowly this time, having calmed down from moments prior. 

“Greta helped me realize I never loved (Y/N), I was doing what was expected after years of friendship,” the losers stare at him- open mouthed and gaping at Richie’s stupidity. 

“She attacked (Y/N) in the bathroom this morning,” Mike tries to reason with his brainwashed friend. 

“No, (Y/N) was lying to you guys. She attacked Greta earlier, not the other way around. She screamed at Greta to break up with me or she’d regret it, and then dumped her books in the toilet and called her slut.”

“Greta did that to (Y/N), you dumbass!” Bev grows increasingly angry, at Richie and herself for coming up with the stupid prank. “I was in there with her, Greta’s convinced (Y/N)’s in love with you so she wants to rip you apart. Do you honestly believe (Y/N) would do something like that?”

“Shit!” Richie slams his fists on the table, causing most of the cafeteria to turn and looking at him briefly before going back to their individual tasks. Everything Greta had blamed on you in the past three months comes rushing back and he realizes that they’re all out of character but in character for Greta. Somewhere along the way he convinced himself that Greta was telling the truth so he had a reason to stop being in love with his best friend- he was too scared to tell you because you’re the only person that could actually hurt him. 

“(Y/N) (L/N) to the principal's office immediately,” the voiceover the intercom cracks showing the age of the ancient system. 

“Richie?” Stan isn’t sure he wants to know the truth as he asks the question. 

“I told Greta to tell the principal,” his voice is oddly quiet and broken, definitely out of character for the jokester trashmouth. 

“You fucking idiot!” Bev seethes, staring Richie down. They’re the only two that know the truth about your father. 

--

You quickly get up from your place in the library and walk down the empty halls to get to the principal's office. Once you arrive the secretary gives you a dirty look, causing you to sink back and the pit of anxiety in your gut to grow. Greta sends you a triumphant smirk before going back to fake sobbing as she walks out of the principal's office and past you. 

You feel like you're going to vomit as you walk into the principal's office behind him, the look on his face says you’ll get after school detention for at least a week! Whatever lies Greta told about you are clearly being believed by him and the secretary. 

“You’re a good student Miss. (L/N), so why have you been harassing Miss. Keene?” he crosses his arms over his chest, they rest lightly on top of his bulging gut. 

“I haven’t-” you try to defend, but he puts up a hand to stop you. 

“She alleges it’s because you have feelings for her boyfriend Mr. Tozier and you’re upset that she chose her over you.”

“That’s not true-” his glare cuts you off this time. 

“Today alone you threw her books in the toilet, threatened her for being with Richie, and called her a slut,” the words today alone stand out to you, how many lies did she tell? 

“She did that to me! Not the other way around!” you try desperately for him to believe you. 

“Then why didn’t you come to me?” he raises a brow much like Richie did in the  cafeteria, Greta has both of them wrapped around her finger and against you. 

“Because no ones ever done anything! She’s been torturing me since we were in grade school and she’s never got in trouble! A freshman came to you last week saying Greta was bullying her and you didn’t do anything!”

“I’m afraid I’ll have to suspend you for the rest of the week.” he says firmly, no room for negotiation or pleading. 

“That’s four days!” you cry out incredulously.

“Do you want to make it longer?” when you don’t respond he continues talking. “Your father is on his way, go get your books from your locker and leave school property.” 

You hear someone call your name from down the hall as you grab all of your textbooks from your locker, trying to shove all five thick books into your bag. You ignore the voice up until it’s right next to you and you realize it’s Richie trying to plead for forgiveness. 

“Lose my number, and while you’re at it forget my name. Stay the fuck away from me Tozier!” Your outburst grabs the attention of the other students walking to their next class, everyone shocked by the inseparable duo of Tozier and (L/N) fighting. You slam your locker shut with a loud bang, heading for the door and away from him calling your name.

--

Monday comes agonizingly slowly, but when it does you're sitting with Bev in the bathroom during third period, both of you telling your teachers you don’t feel good. 

“How bad was it?” she flicks her lighter and lights her cigarette, standing next to the window so she can blow the smoke outside. 

“Worse than it's ever been,” you feel ghost pains on your back from where your dad's leather belt met your flesh for the past six days. “Since Richie didn’t sneak in to help clean them this time I think I may have an infection.”

“He broke up with Greta,” Bev changes the subject, she knows you only trust Richie enough to see the damage your father inflicts, so she doesn’t bother to ask to check on it.” 

“Good for him,” you stare down at the gross linoleum tile under your beat up Chuck Taylor’s. Richie had promised to take you away from your father the moment you two graduated, he’d been promising it for years, even while he was with Greta, but now you aren’t holding out hope for the promise. 

“He’s been miserable without you,” the bell signaling the end of the period saves you from formulating an answer. Bev quickly flushes her cigarette butt and the two of you head to the cafeteria, you’re a little worried about sitting with the losers after your fight with Richie. Bev grabs your hand and gently pulls you to the table when she notices your hesitance. You catch up with the rest of the losers, minus Richie who isn’t in the lunchroom which you’re oddly sad about, finding out about tests and break ups you missed while you were suspended. The loud ear splitting sound of feedback causes the entire cafeteria to cover their ears and look to the microphone stand in the front of the room. Richie is standing in the front holding the microphone, cringing slightly at the loud sound. No lunch ladies run to grab the microphone from him, meaning he got permission to do whatever it is he’s about to do. His wild curls bounce as he nervously shifts from foot to foot as he looks around the cafeteria until he locks eyes with you. You can’t look away from him so you miss the smiles the losers give each other and the high five Bev and Ben share. 

“(Y/N) I don’t know what I could ever say to you to get you to forgive me, I can never forgive myself for hurting you,” he talks into the microphone, everyone looking between the two of you, but neither of you seem to notice anyone but each other. “I know I embarrassed you, so maybe if I embarrass myself in front of everyone you’ll forgive me a little bit. (Y/N), I never meant to hurt you, I only agreed to the prank because I wanted to forget you. No- fuck that doesn’t sound right.

“I’ve been in love with you since middle school and I knew you could never love me too, even when Ed’s told me you did I couldn’t believe it. I wanted to forget my feelings for you because I never wanted to hurt you, so I agreed to the prank. But I hurt you anyway because I let Greta get in my head, so I even failed the damn prank. But I love you so fucking much (Y/N) and I’m sick of running from these damn feelings. All I want to do is take you away from this hellhole after we graduate, and go to NYU together like we’ve planned since Freshman year. I love you (Y/N) (L/N), and I’ll spend the rest of my life apologizing to you about how shitty I was if you give me a second chance.” 

Your body stands up on autopilot, and you don’t realize you’re walking towards him until your face to face. Lifting your hand you gently push a curl that fell in front of his eye away and tuck it behind his ear, he leans his head into your hand as a lunch lady comes and takes the microphone out his hand grinning largely at teen love. You struggle to find words, so you wrap both your hands around the lapels of his leather jacket and pull him into a kiss. It isn’t your first kiss, Bill had dared you two to kiss sophomore year in a game of truth or dare in the barrens, but this kiss is different. These aren't two kids afraid of the adult feelings that were overcoming them, these are two almost adults finally giving into the most powerful and amazing feeling in existence. Richie makes sure to keep his hands away from your back, he’ll clean out your cuts later, instead he tangles his fingers into your hair pulling you in deeper. Before the kiss can go too far you pull back giggling as Richie follows your face trying to kiss you again. 

“I love you too,” you rest your forehead on his, turning your giggling face into a mock serious one. “But you’re on thin ice mister.” 

“I love you more,” he caresses your cheek and you grin happily, laughing at his antics when he starts speaking again. “Than I love Eddie’s mom.” the entire cafeteria is whooping and hollering at your kiss, but non louder than your losers. Well, everyone except Greta, who lets out a high pitched huff and storms out of the cafeteria. 

“I think the prank ended up working out,” you giggle, lightly nipping at Richie’s thumb as it grazes over your lower lip.

Permanent tags: @crimson-knuckled-queen​ @rexorangecouny​

[jockedguy]

I wasnt always a Grunt. I never imagined I would be, I dont know how you can ever see somethin like that coming. I wish I had seen it earlier, because of how happy I am now.

All I have tosay is that I am in a crew, I have a Boss and I have a Chief. They give me orders and I do them because thats what Grunts do. Grunts are Crew Property.

Im what most people would call a Redneck. Even though I live in the city, my Boss and my Chief want me to be a sertain way. Its not good for me to make choices, because I always fuck it up. Its way easier to do what Im told.

Its been a slow process but in the last few months Its been goin faster. Now I wear a lot more leather and we branewash every night, wich is important to me because branewashin is good for me. Theres times when I kinda fall back into who I used to be, because I lived it for so long, but Chief and Boss always remind me that aint who I am anymore. People change, its not so wierd that Im who I am now. Its kinda always who I’ve been anyway underneath. Bossn Chief just help bring it out.

I never relax as good as when Im branewashin. I love hearin the leather creakin n shit when Boss puts me in the chanes and the coller. I love gettin a lil tripped out when the spirals come on the big screan. And all the pics, some of em even look like me. Or I look like them or somethin. Ether way, Its good for me.

Ive always liked dogs, but Im not sure why. Maybe cuz I just never liked cats, cuz they were kinda stupid and smelled bad. A good dog is a good frend, he always hangs out with you and licks your face and rolls around and is a good time. Thats what Im kinda like to my Boss n Chief as a Grunt, cuz Grunts is crew property. Im loyal as fuck and Ill fuck anyone up who trys to fuck with Boss or Chief. Like a dog too. I got a big ass wolf tatted on my arm an hes howlin, it looks badass. I got it cuz Boss told me to get it. Boss knows best.

Someday Boss tells me we wont be in the city anymore, itll be on big land probably in the South and ill work the land. Boss sez its okay that Im more like his employee. He marryed me because its the best way to own me. Theres even a contract that makes me like legaly owned by Boss n Chief. I signed it but I dont remember much about it cuz the words were really fuckin big and I got bored plus Chief said just sign it Grunt so i signed it Grunt and he wacked me on the head and said now he had to make a new one becuz I had to sign my REAL name but i forgot i had one.

Oh yea its Critter, I said when I remembered.

Boss and Chief laughed alot, then Boss took out my wallet from my pants and showed me my drivers ID and it said TUCKER JOHN PRICE.

So thats the name Im suposed to sign on the thing, Chief sez, and I think I get it, but now we gotta wait til he gets a new contract made up.

This is why I gotta dont think for myself, because like Boss n Chief say, its bad for me. I dont think, Boss n Chief think for me.

Slowly the way I think is changeing too. Every once in awhile Ill get a good brite flash of the way Im should be thinkin, slow n simple. Sometimes Ill realize that I wasnt even thinkin at all for a long time, jus kinda zonin out. Sometimes I wake up and Im all in leather and Im watchin the pics go by, all the spirals n shit. Sometimes Ieven think I see myself in those pics, but its goes by so fast that I cant tell.

Sometimes I dream Im in the yard, Im in the future, I feel the sun beatin down on my back and I see I got a shovel in my hand, Im doin some yardwork. I know my trailer aint too far away, and I know I got a shit ton of Coors Lite in the mini frige out there. Theres a piece of wood with the words CRITTERS PLACE painted on it that I did, hangin over the door. The Big House is behind me, and the Branewashin Room is downstairs, with the big screans and the chair with all the yellow straps and chanes. I can still taste the powedery pill that Boss gave me to eat before I sat down in it and can still feel the leather hood that he put over my face on my face now.

Soon we are goin to the South to see Chief. Chief sees me evry day tho, becauze they put a camera in my room. Crew Property gets wached by the higherups. I gotta do good cuz they allways wachin. Chief sez that when I get there Im gonna get more ink. Boss been sayin that he wants me to get a noes ring. That Im a Tattooed Low Life Leather Lovin Freak Dirty Fuckin Redneck, and I should act like it more, act like it better. He sez that if I dont shape up, Im gonna be wearin that muzzle alot more.

Sumtimes it feels a lil wierd, but I gotta remember that im a Grunt, im Crew Property. Even if I feel like maybe once bfore I was Smart or sumthin, even then I wasnt as Smart as Boss n Chief. Definly not now. Im such a good grunt that I even feel like I need to be punnished allot becuz of how often I let myself think im Smart like Boss n Chief. Cant see that on the camra so I gotta say it out loud.

Chief sez my believes will change eventualy. He sez Ive come so far. Boss sez Im a new person. I just know im Grunt, im Crew Property. I dont make choses cuz it hurts my brane. Thats why I need branewashin so that my brane can stop hurtin cuz I gotta think durin the day. I beleve what Chief sez and what Boss sez becuz they havent ben rong yet. Im sure Ill change evn more to what they want becuz Im a Grunt and Im Crew Property, and soon itll be on a contract as soon as I dont fuck it up on the paper.

[pixelated-moon]

Please read if you're going into a haunted house soon (coming from a young actress (scarer))...

Ok, so i know that pepole will try to "scare the scarers (actors)".

Don't. Fucking. Do. That. Yes, there is a slim possibility you can scare us, but 99.9% chance it's because we weren't paying enough attention/weren't aware a group was there.

We are HIRED to scare the living shit out of you.

Especially if you lift your arms trying to scare the scarers. WE WILL THINK YOU'RE GONNA HIT US.

Also for the love of god (... Satan in this case) stay on the fucking path, and go through the most odvious path.

Please for the love of Satan dont flirt with the actors. I have been flirted with so many times from full grown adults it's fucking disgusting... (Actuall genuine compliments like... About their makeup and/or costume (some things about their appearance) is ok. But seriously, no flirting...)

Cuz last night two dudes were trying to scare me and one went OFF THE PATH BEHIND ME AND SCREAMED AT ME. DONT FUCKING DO THAT.

Some things are ok to do, like if there's a screamer and you scream back at them while keeping your distance. That's fine, hell. If it's me I'll even scream back for the fun of it.

But... If you come to them and even back them up into a corner, that's NOT OK. That has happened to me once by two chicks. The guy that was running the area right next to me had to come over to help me out. (Why im always put next to a guy that is 10× bigger than me 101)

Also if your fight or flight instincts goes off (that's normal for guest) and your automatic instinct is the fight option, DONT COME IN AT ALL. THAT CAN GET SOMEONE EXTREMELY HURT. IT CAN BE BOTH ANOTHER CUSTOMER OR AN ACTOR.

Don't purposely insult us actors (that does to fellow actors as well). I dont give a fuck if it's your first instinct if your scared dont do it. Some actors will take that personally. If your an actor and you know a person can take it make it a joke and not a real insult. Because, givin this has happened to me before and they knew i can take a joke on it and not get offended, they made it a joke on my appearance and that i dont get enough beauty sleep. I flat out went along with the joke and someone thought i was being serious.

(Btw, why i say fellow actors on the last one is because i was at a kids event for my work. I was in my Jack skeleton onesie (so I'm not scary for the kids. Also the onesie is comfy and warm) and without makeup (aka me 24/7) and this dude, that is a worker, says he's 16 (i absolutely refuse to beleve that he's only a year older than fuckin me), and swears like a FUCKING SALOR was there. And every time i pass by him he cones into my face and says "Eww... You ugly". Just... Wtf? You ugly too bitch. (Also this guy is hated thoughout my whole job. Was originally only two occasions for me. One was i was in an graveyard, he was in tge area begore me and HE RAN ALL THE WAY OVER TO MY AREA INTERUPTING MY SCARE TO MAKE THEM LAUGH. Just... Wtf? STAY IN YOUR GODDAM AREA. Another was before the night, i was in kidnap and in the cage, where im better in. I was the only one there so no one could slam the door open. He came in and tried to FORCE ME to slam open the door, which wouldnt make sense why im still a victim and kidnapped, when im seriously out of there and can just leave in realistic terms. I said hell no and proved him (because he kept trying to tell me what to do... In usually in there bitch, i know what to do. Get tge fuck back in Cattle cages (where he was supposed to be)) that im better in the cage than out. Plus, i get far more scares in one night than he even gets in a fucking week))

Reblogs and/or add ons are very much appreciated on this post.

[wtfzodiacsigns]

I need to let you know that….

Aries : I envy you. The way you carelessly live, day by day. The fact that you have to put in so little to make anything into perfection.

Taurus : You lighten me up. Your kindness and such passion in every single move. What you do is so beautiful.

Gemini : Your mind and attitude towards life is something many of us wish we had. Just be your purest self, you goofballs.

Cancer : Your presence and energy make me feel safe. I want you to know that i love you, and that i see how you pay attention to every little thing around you, and i adore you because of that.

Leo : You don’t owe anyone anything. You don’t have to be liked by everyone. Just be. Your heart is golden and you care. You truly do care. Make sure you’re always smiling. It looks so good on you.

Virgo : Sometimes it’s hard to beleve that you are even human. You’re so smart, and beautiful inside and out. When i fly, you bring me back to the ground. Thank you for everything.

Libra : Oh, my dear. You deserve everything good from this world. I love the way you think, and appretiate everyone around you. You bring the best out of

me, and you never fail to make me laugh. You’re so unaware of how beautiful you are.

Scorpio : It seems like the more i know you, the less i truly know. The world does not hate you. Revenge won’t last. Why don’t you just say what you’re hiding?

Sagittaurius : You are worth fighting for. When i see you, i see so much pain in your eyes. Yet, your strength and honesty make it disappear. You’re a true friend, and you always remember.

Capricorn : You’re way too precious for this world darling. When i look at you, i see myself. You’re hurt, and cursed. You care too much, and it kills you. Under that mask, i see only purity and hunger for love.

Aquarius : You give so much of yourself to others, trying to prove something you can’t. You burn in your own flames which you can’t control, and you come off as a different person than you actually are. Keep changing the world for the better.

Pisces : I have so much to tell about you. I’ve been looking at you, just being the purest and most loving self, and it kills me that you’re so underappreciated. It kills me, because people think it’s fake, but it’s not. Live in the clouds, i’ll join you.

Source: sarramcfisa

[talvanis-the-snow-elf]

6th of Evening Star

I am sitting at a table in the Winking Skeever, enjoying the last drink of the night. I am alone, and I do not know when I will see my friends again. But it is good. There are things we all need to do before seeing one another again. To be brief... (I always say this, and then I am never brief. Not even remotely.)

As we departed from the Chantry, we headed with haste to Fort Dawnguard. Our horses were rested, so they handled the journey relatively well. We spent the night camping down on the Whiterun tundra, before being off again, and reached Fort Dawnguard by mid-day. When I entered the fort, it was the first and likely the last time I will ever see Isran make that face.

He was utterly stunned by the sight of Auri-El's bow, praised its beauty, and me for retrieving it, before rallying the Dawnguard. Everyone was already prepared to leave at a moment's notice, so that was what happened. Another long journey northwest.

As we had horses, we arrived to the northern shores far sooner than the rest of the Dawnguard, so we set up camp and rested there for the night. The rest of them arrived the next day, in the early morning hours, but I asked that we wait with our attack, as Auri-El's bow will work far better in open sunlight. Isran accepted.

After the sun had risen high in the sky, but still before noon, we attacked. As the vampires and gargoyles came running down from the castle, I loosed one arrow to the sun, not knowing exactly what would happen but trusting Gelebor, and it was like nothing I could have imagined. A bright flash, then fire rained from the sky, harming only the undead abominations. (I am sorry, Serana. She is fine, however.)

Every arrow, blessed by Gelebor, that I put into our foes set them ablaze. Incredible. The bow is also far swifter than any I have seen before.

We made it inside the castle, where I killed many vampires, including two elves, one Altmer and one Dunmer (at least, formerly so), who Serana later told me, had been in high positions within the castle. I recalled then having met the Altmer when I took Serana there the first time.

The Dunmer, before I killed him, said "After 400 years, you think you'll be the one to take me down?"

Yes.

After every vampire, gargoyle, and death hound was dead... doubly dead... it was time to face Harkon.

I asked Lucien and Brelyna to stay behind, and they did so with little protest. I care too much and they are not skilled enough to meet such a foe.

Inside was Harkon, in his hideous vampire form, and had the audacity to request me to simply hand the bow over. I refused, naturally, and he commented on my "hypocrisy" for not killing Serana.

Perhaps, but he was quite the hypocrite himself, too, as I seem to recall, his dying words were "No, Serana... your own father..." while he was intent on killing her for the prophecy.

The battle was... frustrating, and I was very grateful to Gelebor for blessing so many arrows, as their sunfire damage truly helped. In the end, Harkon collapsed into a pile of red ash by his shrine to Molag Bal. I would see the entire place turned to rubble, but especially that particular room.

Not everyone survived. Agmaer, the Nord boy I met while first joining the Dawnguard, and Beleval, the delightful Bosmer archer, are dead. I took Beleval's Dawnguard amulet in her memory, and said my usual words over their remains, wishing them well in whatever came next.

Then, we took the boat back. Before we got on the horses, I asked Serana if she had thought about curing herself. She could be her own person, again, and she agreed that it would be nice to "not have to be so thirsty all the time". I suppose my "discussion" with Vyrthur and his leaving might have affected her, as well, even if she did not say so.

In any case, she left, to see Falion, and I do not know when she will return. After that, the three of us went here, to the Winking Skeever, for a night of drinking and celebrating. All on me, of course. Then we said our farewells. Lucien is going back to Dumzbthar, and Brelyna to the College, to "look after it for me".

They are both so sweet and I shall miss them dearly, even if it will only be for a few weeks.

[sammerrickblog]

Animation Foundations: Drawing Cartoon Characters by Dermot O'Connor

The resone i chose this tutorial is becasue i want to improve my charicter desighns and also improve on my drawings ofanimals and monsters wich are both apart of this corse

Proportions

I have never really experimented with proportions for a character and seeing this tutorial really helped me to realise this I want to experiment with more creative body types and not just have all my characters look the same size and weight. Along with this I really liked how creating these characters was explained by breaking them down to there most basic shapes and building up from there. Breaking down the character like this was really helpful to me to design these characters and better understand the postures.

tangents

tangents are where a line conects with another but isnt ment to in a 3d space the example given in the tutorial is a mans hair tuching his nose, this isnt men to happen and onlt likkd like this because of how it was drawn tangents arnt something i have really been looking out for however from now on im going to try to improve on thisas i know know how inportant it is it can be really destracting or confusing for a viewer. the examples given really helped me to understand how much these things stand out and howto fix them by simmply moving the charicter or objet thats doing this.

eyes

i didnt expect to see this when going throuhg the tutorial however i found i really usefull as i find eyes one of the more difficult things to draw, i really liked all the examples given andseeing them really made me want to practis wich ones i prefure to use and how to use them realistacly and intresting. the rotation is something i espesualy strugle with such as if a charicter islooking up or down and this tutorial helped me to lay this out and simplyfy it.

nose

along with the eyes i really wanted to pratase more on drawing the nose as i findit difficult to make it look threedamentonal. becasue of this i desided to experiment on my previos drawings by addind diffrent nose styles and angles.

mouth

with the mouth i wanted to experiment alot more i really liked the idea ofimproving on the origanaleye and nose drawings by using this tutorial to make intresting charicters while also helping me to improve the basics of charicter desighn

hair and aditonal detail

finaly i added hair to the drawings and extra detail to make them look more refined, the hair is something that i really strugled with but will practis more in the future, i like how most of them have turend out i wanted to experement with each of them i think the only one i dont like is the bottome middle as the proportios are realy off and dosent really look that apealing, however istill feel as though i have learnd alot from doing this

i really liked doing this i found the experamantaition really helpfull and feel as though i have really improved in creatingintresting looking charicters. these are my three favorat that i have colored and added detail so that i could see what the final cariter would look like and im really happy with the outcome.

clothing

i wanted to become better at desighning cloths and make them realisticfor my chricers i espesualy struggle with dresses becasue of this i faund this part really usefull to learn abourhowfabrics flow and drag relating to the position of a charicrer.along with this headgear is something i never really thought about. you need to really know what the charicters head is like under for example a helmit and how it fits and rests on the charicters head.

animal

this is one of the main resons i wanted to do this tutorial and i found it really really usefull. the first thing that i found really intresting wasthe examples given when it comes to drawing dogs for example one style is very simmiler to bugs bunny whereits esentualy a man in a sute it has all the posture and stanse as a human but with animal feachers. another style is an anitomicaly corect dog but have the animal pose simmiler to a human. i want to practus both of these style to see what i prfure but with a diffrent animal.

i based both f these drawings on the bird in the middle but only cahneged thestlyle i drew it in and i was suprised at how diffrent the two haricters look even thogh there based on the same thing. after doing this i can see how both styles are intresting in there own way i feel as though with the more anthropomorphic animal on the left can be more expresive and have morea cartoony qualatys, however i really like the one on the right too as it feels more life like and i feel has more personalaty.

the most important thing that i took from this section is how important it is to consider a animals bone structure, an example given was a gorses leg has bent joints and would bedrawn vastly diffrent to a elifent who has streght legs this is important becasue if a elifants legs where like this it would look strange and not atomicly corect it would seem as though the animals leg would sna because of its wght. in adition to this reserch is a huge part on drawing a animal its essentalto know the anatomyof the animal no matter what style your working in so that it looks belevable,

creatures/monsters

when creating monsters one thing streght away apeeled to me and thatsthe freedome these things dont exist there is no real refrance you are fully free to explore and create really outlandish consepts wich is something i want to implament in to my work in order to make relly intresting and uniqe chaiters. another thing that was taked about was creating robots, there simmiler tomonsters in the fact that you have compleate fredomto crate anthing you want howver robots more than often use very geometric shapes.

these are the creachers imade from this prosess some monster and some robot i really enjoyed creatingthese and beleve that if it wasnt for what i learnd erlyer in this tutorial about slowly building u and bloocking out a charicter i wouldnt have been able to do this each one is made up ofsimple shapes then slowy built up on to create the finishedimage even with charicters like theres, for example the first charicter started of as a simple blob shape then basic guidlines for the tentucals and eyes and detail was slowly added, i find this prosses works reallly well dor me and im glad i know understand it alot more.

conclusion

after finishing this tutorial i am now much more confident in creating my characters whether that be a person animal or monster i believe that doing this has dramatically improved my skills and helped me to better understand what makes a character interesting. going forward I want to practise more on drawing animas as this sis the thing i believe I struggled with the most.

[sariels-world-ella]

Deltarune O.Cs Briar Spades and Barkley Wart

Pictures

Comics/Pictures with words

Briar's Dialogue at the end is "since when could you do that?"

Dialogue is: "What the frick, man?", "I hate when they choose the hard way", "uhh, it's more of a "my principal"

Dialogue is:

This is it, huh? I couldn't stop your terror... I failed them all, but someone, somewhere, will stop you and make you suffer the consequences

The pain you caused (I forgot/cannot make out what it's supposed to say)

Barkley are you there?

It's great to see you again my friend..

It really is...

Dialogue

Barkley let's go, these guys are lame.

I said LET'S GO BARKLEY

Unless you want to be friends with them instead of me.

Dialogue:

Don't you have anything better to do?

Your my friend too, Barkley.

Information about them

Briar Spades

Age: about 14-16, height: 5ft, sexuality: pansexual

Briar is a dark lander with a canine appearance, her personality consists of rude, bossy, short tempered, serious, highly intelligent with a impossible IQ of 236, she uses her bad girl persona to help hide her self conciousness, either way loves to cause mischief and won't hesitate to break rules but when needed she will take action against evil and does aline with a good morality.

She has moderate health, high attack and weak defense, she mainly fights with Sickles and prefers melee combat dispite her weak defense, she is has good agility and speed but not so great stamina also due to her high intellect she is capable to take out ememies who are stronger than her, though she doesn't always succeed

She holds a close relationship with Barkley though she is tough on him, insults, occasionally tries to hurt him and always dragging him in her ill-intent schemes, she does greatly care about him, and considers him a good friend.

Barkley Wart

Age: unknown, but is at most teenage mentality and physical form, height: he can change his height at will, sexuality: heterosexual.

Barkley Wart (last name pronounced with a silent "R") is some sort of black and white belevant phantom-like creature, he never talks though when he does, it is a screech with jumbled unintelligible dialogue. He is highly forgiving, kind, pushover, obsessive, hyper, easily startled, supportive, over protective, and innocent, he always goes along with Briar Spades mischievous charades even if he doesn't want to, and always forgives Briar for being mean to him.

His stats are unknown but his abilities include mid-air suspension, self-size manipulation which he can grow himself up to 30 feet tall or shrink himself to an inch tall, and undead complex.

He has a crush on Briar which she does not return, dispite this he loves and cares for her nonetheless, he will bend over backwards for her, and always supports her though her insecurities about her appearance and self-worth.

[jaskiersbeloved]

2x12 You are not your own

WARNING: This review contains spoilers! 

1. MAGNUS

Oh my God. I couldn’t keep myself from crying. This… Those things that were done to him are unacceptable. That mini restrospection killed me… And his speech to Alec to make him realzie it was really him… Christ, I think my heart shatterd into milion peaces… I’m so worried about him. Shit like this is traumatic. He’s not gonna recover so fast. And his trust to Alec is now broken. Let him finally rest, he DOES NOT deserve such a treatment… And when he was calling for Alec while still being locked in cell and waitng for help... He doesn’t deserve this... he deserves all of possible happiness in this world...

2. ALEC

Boy did I got angry… Alec, I love but… You should put your trust to your heart, not to Jace damnit. Beceause of this something terrible almost happened… And he didn’t beleve Magnus until he saw that Valentine kidnapped Jace... Ugh... I understand, Valentine can fool everyone, you shouldn’t trust him but... Really? You could see that’s somethings off, Alec... But well I must admit he had his momets. Fighting Azazel was really good. And I’m glad he’s not trusting Sebastain like literally everyone else did… And he helped to clean up Magnus’ loft…

3. MALEC

Ouch… I feel pain everywhere. Now between Alec and Magnus a wall is building. Magnus in next episode returns to his “old” self. Don’t get me wrong I love this but… As someone smartly pointed on tumblr this is Magnus’ way of shilding himself from all of that what happed… Not to mention the lack of touching each other at the end of the episode (which made me cry even more). I think this was on point, that Alec hasn’t touched him. Magnus’ body were taken by other man. Now he can feel unfamiliar in his own body (and again someone smartly stated that this could somehow represent rape. If this supposed to somehow represnt this that Magnus wouldn’t want to be touched. Like. At all.). I feel really sad thinking about this. Alec and Magnus grew to be more affectionate with each other. You can see this in small thing like when Alec touched “Magnus’” cheek or hugged him after “saving” him from Azazel.. I’m upset that this weren’t showed us when Magnus was really Magnus, but well… All of this is now lost…

4. Valentine

Valentine’s behaviour was one of things that kept my laugh during the episode. His confused faces or how he desperately tried to get out of this body. And yeah, mister “I don’t do deals with demons"… why you called Dot then? Lol, one of the biggest hypocrites that I know… One thing that keeps bothering me are his last words to Clary, that she’s gonna regret this…. I wonder if this will have a menaing in future episodes…

5. Sizzy

Yay I’m glad that something in a way happy happend. Those Sizzy scences were nice. I really liked that last scene with the rain and umbrellas buuuut those whole thing with Rosa… Guys, you could see from SPACE that this is not gonna end well…

6. Izzy

She’s really starting to annoy me… Girl, you should ALWAYS listen you your older brother… Trust me, I know a thing or two about this…And literally the worst thing you possibly could come up with, was that whole thing with Rosa… Like… Girl there are limits! But I’m glad that yin fen addiction dosn’t fade away and when that vampire girl mocks her, asking if she still want the vampire venom she looked struggled… Good to know that she still wants to fight with it…

7. Simon

Dude… You should really ask Izzy first how is she before you ask for help… But I see it becomes a common thing to the pairs in Shadowhunters (cough cough Malec). I like how he was hesitant about Izzy’s plan… But that scene in Jade Wolf… Boy, listen to Luke, really, you’re gonna hurt yourself…

8. The battle of the ships aka Clace vs. Climon

a) Clace

Well… That sparring was really nice. Even though Jace’s overprotectivness was unnesesarry but well, I think I’ll manage.

b) Climon

No. Just no. You are not giving me things like Climon “waking up naked in a bed” scene AT THE VERY START OF THE EPISOED. And you shouldn’t end the episode with this either! And I feel sorry for Simon, we all know that Clary is gonna dump him soon…

9. Jace

Oh I’m so happy for him, but also kind of angry… hell on who I was NOT angry in this episode? Like dude… Beceause of you Magnus almost got executed… BUT! I’m happy that he now knows that he’s a Herondale and he knows it directly from Valentine and Imogen… AND IMOGEN IS ALIVE so maybe they will have enough time to bulid some kind of a family bond? That would be awesome!

10. Clary

Big suprise she didn’t annoy me! But girl… Same as Izzy…. You DO NOT trust a random Shadowhunter. And yeah… You ALWAYS listen to Clave don’t you? :/ But I’m glad she started to do this, even though she did this for personal reasons…

11. Sebastian

I LOVE foreshadowing XDD I like that he showed some of his dark side… And even then ALMOST everyone trusts him on an instatnt… That two talks with Clary were creepy… O.o And the last one… Guy, you DIDN’T JUST ASK YOUR SISTER TO BE WITH YOU…. God, I HATE the insect…

12. People that were there just to be there…

a) Imogen

I don’t know how am I supposed to feel about her anymore… Sure she is pretty sadistic… But also… She immediately accepted Jace as her family, she even gave him that sygnet! And that was a nice touch! I hope we will see her bonding with Jace and hopefully she won’t be killed of that fast

b) Luke

He was… Just there… Just to be there… That’s hella sad!

c) Dot

Nice she popped out… She had a great outfit… And I’m happy that she looks better now ^^

d) Rapahel

Dude. I get you. I’d be pissed off too! But… DON’T KILL SIMON, PLEASE!

e) Azazel

He would make a great villan really… A pity he was killed off so fast :( But on the other hand… DIE BITCH, DIE!

13. AFTER ALL

Ugh this CGI… Ouch​, it hurts… but I managed to watch Classic Who so I think I just have to get used to it. Harry and Alan deserves every kind of awards that they could have. Like really their acting was A+++++++++!! And speaking of acting: I really like Will. I’m curious about his Sebastian ^^ I’m also glad that previous episodes still have an impact on charachters I hope, that they’ll keep it up! And I HAVE TO find the song that was playing on the last moments of the episode!

So… I’m gonna give this episode 4/6 and I can’t WAIT for more!

[supreme-kai-zamasu]

✨ + Goku, Cherish, Young Zamasu and Vegeta

@supersaiyanblue-goku

Their first marriage was some kind of joke  and he would prefer to forget it.

But their second one? He was so tired, after months of preapring to this. After a stress of proposing to his Lord. After a stress to ask all of guests and what they would think about it.

But still, when he finally was by his Lord side, he forgot about whole world around. Almost passing out, saying  those two  simple words. But being  linked to him even more, it was  all worth it.

@thecrystalizeddemongirl

He  remember his first meetings with Cherish. He would never forgot all of those magical places she showed to him. Just... He liked that she was kind of person with who you can just sit by and be silent for a moment. Enjoying nature all around them.

@deadly-sixtus

First meeting with his younger self... was interesting experince. Finding out that his Gowasu-sama was still alive... He just remember his shock when seeing other version of him - a younger one. And... that heavy... feeling in his heart. That he was responsible to help other Zamasu... became a better person than Supreme Kai is now.

He  just didn’t want him to suffer as he is.

@royallunatiic

That few seconds. That few seconds in which she stopped believing in half things she was beleving for so long.

The way his majesty was walking. The way he was talking. The way his tail was moving along him in graceful manner - or was wrapped tightly around his waist. It wasn’t even about his perfect physical presence - he was just... attracting both in his soul and body.

And that something made her stay at royal palace instead of her own realm. Because she felt that terryifing need to make King Veget hers.

[sarramcfisa]

I need to let you know that....

Aries : I envy you. The way you carelessly live, day by day. The fact that you have to put in so little to make anything into perfection.

Taurus : You lighten me up. Your kindness and such passion in every single move. What you do is so beautiful.

Gemini : Your mind and attitude towards life is something many of us wish we had. Just be your purest self, you goofballs.

Cancer : Your presence and energy make me feel safe. I want you to know that i love you, and that i see how you pay attention to every little thing around you, and i adore you because of that.

Leo : You don't owe anyone anything. You don't have to be liked by everyone. Just be. Your heart is golden and you care. You truly do care. Make sure you're always smiling. It looks so good on you.

Virgo : Sometimes it's hard to beleve that you are even human. You're so smart, and beautiful inside and out. When i fly, you bring me back to the ground. Thank you for everything.

Libra : Oh, my dear. You deserve everything good from this world. I love the way you think, and appretiate everyone around you. You bring the best out of

me, and you never fail to make me laugh. You're so unaware of how beautiful you are.

Scorpio : It seems like the more i know you, the less i truly know. The world does not hate you. Revenge won't last. Why don't you just say what you're hiding?

Sagittaurius : You are worth fighting for. When i see you, i see so much pain in your eyes. Yet, your strength and honesty make it disappear. You're a true friend, and you always remember.

Capricorn : You're way too precious for this world darling. When i look at you, i see myself. You're hurt, and cursed. You care too much, and it kills you. Under that mask, i see only purity and hunger for love.

Aquarius : You give so much of yourself to others, trying to prove something you can't. You burn in your own flames which you can't control, and you come off as a different person than you actually are. Keep changing the world for the better.

Pisces : I have so much to tell about you. I've been looking at you, just being the purest and most loving self, and it kills me that you're so underappreciated. It kills me, because people think it's fake, but it's not. Live in the clouds, i'll join you.

[chlopiercer-blog]

Lanterns

I told a friend of mine that the slow process of uncovering the person I truly am was like falling in love, and that's true. Lately, however, it's felt more and more like falling in love with someone I can never be with. There's a hole in me that only this woman can fill, but I'm not likely to ever meet her, much less become a part of her. We're separated by a dense fog of fear and circumstance that neither of us can hope to penetrate. It's deeply heartbreaking to see her from afar, this beautiful girl, to see her and to know that she wants to be part of me just as badly as I want to be part of her, but to know that to reach out and touch each other would be to destroy both of us. The moment we touch, we'll ignite, banishing the darkness and burning away the fog and monsters with the light of our union, but what will remain? One, whole person? Or ash? It's true that together we could build a new life, a new version of us, perhaps even a better one, but would the pain of that burn truly be worth it? If I knew for certain who we would be, what life we would have, the shape of the future we could build, I think it would be enough. But I don't. And to scorch everything I am in order to build a new me doesn't always seem to be worth the risk. I'm a very vain person. I've been lucky enough to end up with a body that I'm mostly cool with. I think I'm pretty darned good looking, if I'm being honest. A little conceited, I know, but there it is. I've never had a problem with dating, and I've even had a day or two where I feel like I turned some heads. This is foolish as hell, but I don't want to give that up. I have no idea if I could make my physical appearance work this well as a woman. If I could afford plastic surgery, it would be different, of course. Everything would be different if I had money, really. Another thing is my voice. I love to sing, I talk nonstop, and I think I sound like a man. Even as I write it, I know how wrong that is. I know that everyone is beautiful. I know that it doesn't matter what someone looks like. I know that I don't have to "look like" or "sound like" a woman to be one. If another trans woman said this to me, I'd tell her that none of that matters. If a cis person said to me that a trans person doesn't "look like" whatever gender they identify as, I would get angry. I wouldn't tolerate it. When it comes to myself, however, I can't seem to get myself to feel it. I know the right words, I say them to myself, as I would to any trans woman, and I beleve them with all my heart, but when I look at myself all I can see is a man. When I hear my voice, I hear a man's voice. I don't see her. I don't hear her.

I know she's out there, but usually I only see her as a shape in the fog. A silhouette. Her voice is muffled when she speaks. The notes of her song are distorted and distant. I try to see her in that mist and sometimes, out of the corner of my eye, I do. The color of my eyes, or the shape of my lips, or the curve of my jawline strikes my eye just right, and for a fraction of a second, I see her. For a fraction of a second, I am her, lost in that fog, but when I try to reach out and touch my face, to finally bring us together in wholeness, all I feel is the cold glass of the mirror. And that's just the physical aspect of it! So much is keeping us apart. So much darkness makes up that fog. So many monsters stalk us within it. Money, society, fear of losing my family, fear of losing the life I've only just now started to build, fear of anything even vaguley medical, fear of the government and the inevitable abuse and cruelty that will come with it... my mind can be fragile. I simply don't believe I could handle the stress. I would crack up, relapse and fall back into self-harm, or worse. If I do nothing, however... I leave her in limbo forever. We are devoured. So I take a step into the fog, going as far as I dare, and just before I dart back out in fear, I leave a lantern. I try something new. I wear leggings and a camisole under my clothes. A lantern. I paint my nails. A lantern. I come out to someone new, I join a support group, I do something as simple as whispering my name to myself in a soft sibilant voice. All lanterns. I start a blog. Each softly burning light makes it a little bit safer, a little bit easier to return. I truly am falling in love with her. With MYSELF. More and more, every day. There's no doubt about that. I can no more leave her in that fog than I could a flesh and blood love. I have to reach her. In time, I know we must come together and burn everything we are to cinders in the hopes that what remains will be not coals, but a forged and tempered whole, stronger than ever. I don't know what I fear more. The blackness, the beasts, or the blaze. For now, though, she's wandering in that cold, thick fog. All I can do is try to reach her, leaving lights to guide her back to me. Or, if I never can, to at least make her abyss a little less dark. One lantern at a time.

[finsterhunde]

On the way back to the hotel I made the mistaken of criticizing organized religion too close to a megachurch. This guy who was lying down outside the church started screaming after me, "don't you DARE speak out against the church." My heart breaks for him. His loyalty to the very same people who built a giant fucking building, sitting empty at 8PM while he curls up against its wall. The people who donate thousands of dollars to build up an empty testiment to their loyalty to a savior who fed the hungry will sit idly by and let us starve. They don't care about you. Jesus literally spoke against this. He threw a violent fit because of people selling things inside a holy place. I have a lot of respect for his teachings even though being raised abusively in the faith has made me grow to fear and resent his followers. I did not speak disparagingly about whatever personal relationship you have to whatever your beleve. I spoke against a display of monetary squalor. Of classist displays of superiority. And I spoke about it quietly, in a personal conversation with my friend.

But how DARE I publicly criticize a religion. How DARE I.

Christianity sat idily by, no, was the justification used, for my abuse, my suffering, my poverty. I express disdain at the massive waste of public space and literal child endoctrination programs painted up to look appealing and inconspicuous and someone literally suffering in its shadow comes to their defense like a trained dog.

You have proved my point. That they are predatory, that they take advantage of and harm vulnerable people. I feel heartsick witnessing this. I only hope you find yourself in a better situation soon. That you find a safe home and some mental support. I'm sorry I ruined your night.

New updates since I started writing this post: We met with friends at a ramen restaurant and they told me that on the way there (along the same street we walked) some guy wearing a "you will burn in hell" ???? shirt was physically assaulting people (shaking them) on the street to get donations and screaming. I have no way of knowing if it was the same guy, but if it was my sympathy is retracted. You NEVER touch people when panhandling. That ruins it for everybody else. It gives people ammunition to get homeless people arrested. NEVER physically assault anyone. You run the risk of indirectly getting another drifter hurt or killed.

I hate fearing for my life because of the exact same bullshit that ruined my childhood. Now I'm sick this guy is making trouble for the other people on the street here.

[regalthaumaturge]

The White Wolf

“Everyone wants to be the sun to lighten up someone’s life, but why not be the moon, to brighten in the darkest hour?”

QUOTES

“ THE MORE YOU LOVE YOUR DECISIONS, THE LESS YOU NEED OTHERS TO LOVE THEM.”

“ STOP BEING AFRAID OF WHAT COULD GO WRONG AND START BEING EXCITED ABOUT WHAT COULD GO RIGHT.”

BASIC

NAME;  Akiva Muraco Kane

AGE; 25

BIRTHDAY;  

IMMEDIATE FAMILY;

· Zodiac; Sagittarius

· Chinese Zodiac; Fire Tiger

· Height; 5,11

City or town of birth; Beacon Hills, CA

· Species; Shaman(shape-shifter) witch

Physical Appearance

• Hair Colour: Blackish brown

• Eye Colour; brown

• Weight: 159 lbs

• Build: Athletic fit muscle

• Tattoos: None

• Piercings:

• Clothing Style; The shifter has a laid-back sense of style nothing flashy or expensive simple clothing fit for long traveling

• Usual Expression: expressive and inviting

• Distinguishing Characteristics:

Health

• Physical Ailments: None

• Neurological Conditions: none

• Allergies: Wolfsbane

• Sleeping Habits:

• Eating Habits: A big eater who likes trying new things

• Exercise Habits: extensive rigorous

• Emotional Stability: Fair

• Sociability: A highly social person

• Body Temperature: very warm

• Addictions; none

• Drug Use: None

• Alcohol Use:

· Abilities/Skills; shapeshifting, dreamwalking, astral projection, demission travel

· Likes; dancing, nature, animals, snow, spring, theater

· Dislikes; Drama, coffee,

· Phobias;

PERSONALITY

disciplined has a lot of self-control thinks in the moment, Adventurous, open minded, honest charismatic, daring,   decisive, Nihilistic, Fixed, Fickle, stubborn, Slightly aimless

BIOGRAPHY

Akiva Kane is the first child of Amara and Nashoba Kane. born on 23rd 1986 in the quiet town of Beacon hills califironia. he is a shape-shifting shaman like his father. unlike his little sister his magic manifested at a young age thus he gotten the proper training from his parents. Born into a prestigious family on both sides bloodlines dates back tousands of years is a huge legacy to live up too. He is a shape-shifting shaman like his father, unlike his little sister his magic manifested at a young age thus he gotten the proper training from his parents.

In his younger years Akiva was homeschooled. this decsion was made so he’ll have free rage to get the basic princples of magic down. after a while his parents realized their son although he was very active in martial arts and gymnastic was getting lonely hungering for more interactions with other kids for he’s naturally a social child. he started public school in the fifth grand.In a matter of no time using his natural charm to won his classsmates over. Akiva cared less about academics at school getting above average grades usualy Bs C+ and some As here and there.

Unlike his talented cousin Malina, he struggled with magic nothing came easily but he refuse to give up in the end it payed off. hitting pupity ealier than expected the boy preseented as a aether witch same type of element his father weild. Afterwards Nashoba begin to take his son daily deep in the woods for training sessions. One day practicing he fully mastered one complete transfromation into a white wolf. Proud he wanted to show Dama'ati his new skill sneaking out away from civilazation unaware a enemy coven were on the lose tracking them. unnoticed they were ambushed he tried his best to re too young and sorely outnumbered they escape with his counsin, even after so many years pass Akiva still carries the guilt.

A week later his parents announce he was going to be big a brother hoping it’ll cheer him up it did. Akiva was ecstatic of the news having a playmate someone who can teach and guide about their family traditions most importantly able be a great older sibling also beleving it’ll make him a better future leader the hardest part he still fears he’ll mess up. on OCT 31st Aaliyah was born. Akiva stick to his sister side sepratable taking the big brother role seriously. changing diapers feeding without complaint. Aaliyah was he joy they did everything together. as years move on though reaching his teenage years they natural grew apart-as Aaliyah was old enough to hang around friends her age still he’ll find ways to bring her along with him to kid friendly events usual at the ice skating rank.

After graduating high school instead of going straight to college Akiva shortly left beacon hills and join a acrobatic theater company qrenching his love of entertaining others while traveling the country an opptunity he cound not pass up.

PRESENT

With both parents now gone Akiva took charge their small coven. Now he  helps his other remaining relatives matain their family witch apothecary buisness- which it also hosts as a secert meeting ground between supernaturals.taking the role of his fathers position untill Aaliyah learns her powers and understand the messy witch politics and curlture. for now Akiva taking maority of the responsibility. His main job is to make new negotionations keep up old treaties with other covens and the few werewolf packs and other supernatural habitaints whithin Beacon county.

MBTI: ESFJ

Enneagram: Type 6 wing 7

Temperament: Phlegmatic-Sanguine

Moral Alignment: Lawful Good

Primary Vice: Gluttony

Primary Virtue: Humility

Element: Aether

[xottzot]

2018-03(MAR)-16th--Friday (later)--Max & Sam & Me are all utterly abandoned and withouut dear Fliss are consigned to die alone unloved.

The title says it all of this post. It's not a title of any 'made-up' story, or any fiction. This is hell itself.

Dear Cath (Cath Allan sp? of Queensland, Australia) loves to write about made-up fantasies in her mind, but she instead runs away from knowing any truth. She can control the fantasy stories she writes and imagines. But any and everytime I have tried to approach her to help with dear Fliss and I, she suddenly imagines wild fantasies to suit her own mind, a mind that she indulges in whorls of 'female rights', female strengths, female power (of all kind) and at all costs, and that is how she imagienes herself to be, a valiant stalwart soldier fighting for injustice. - But when faced with helping me wit dear Fliss who has terrible mental & phycical ailments tht has ton dear Fliss and I apart also once before, der Cath REFUSES to help me and us, instead claiming that NOW it shows PROOD of hwta sh had crazily imagined before, instead of showing PROOF of what I has always been truthfully saying for so many years and which dear Cath herself saw for herself, that dear FLss suffers from (and has suffered fro for many years even before I ever has known dear Fliss) that Fliss suffers badly from hashimoto's thyroiditis and mania and Hypothyroidism, and mental disroders, and many other mental and physical things that dear Fliss always tries to keep hidden from anyone knowing.

Please do not think I hate dear Fliss. I NEVER have done so, not EVER. And the same goes for dear Cath. (of Queensland), who has her own problems but is married and at least has a loving husband for suport and some family.

I have nobody.

I have alwasy loved dear Fliss far more than even her own family. They will object to that, but it is true. They always saw her as the 'black sheep' of their family, the one they nver talk about, or who they use as the butt of all their jokes at poor Fliss's extent. The one who was alwasy more trouble than she was worth as Fliss herself told me. She was barely talked about unless it was in jokes upon her life itself. They live lives of false wealth and stature and want all others to know that of them rather than any truth. Social-standing to them mean everything more than life itself.

I knew nothing of any all this before I met and became as husband and protector to dear Fliss.

If there was a cliff near here I would this very moment fling myself off from it and kill myself. Life is THAT bad withiout being with dear Fliss, the woman I love whom I havelove and protected even to the expense of my own life. She does not known that. And if told that she will refuse to believe it. But it is the absolute truth.

The criminals, the child criminals, the violent criminals of all ages and sexes, the arson, the threats to everyone, the condescensions of authorities and Western Australian Police whenever I have dared to speak to them only reults in ME being accused as if I was made out to be a madman....and yet it ALL keeps going on and getting worse without ANYthing by me whatsoever, the violent assaults, the home invasions, the car thefts, the thefts from the nearby shops, and shops all around including Midland, the neighbours being assaulted and threatened and then coerced, the rampant drug taking, the rampant booze taking, and all of that is not just confined to the adults but to the criminals of all ages including toddlers and babies both being as victims and perpetrators as they grow older.

It is a hellhole here.

A hellhole dear Fliss PROMISED to save me from and that we would be togteher far from here, well away from here in a normal place, a place that people accept exists, NOT this hellhole that nobody wants to know of and dos NOT want to admit exists in any way shape or form, and that's the way it has been for decades here ever increasing.

Cath, one fo Fliss's dearest friends (who lives in Queensland with her husband Ken and their children), does NOT know of anything because dear Fliss REFUSED to tell her anything but made-up lies. Fliss loves Cath so dearly that she alwaus said to me in private that she only wants to protect dear Cath from 'not knowing things which might harm her' (mentally and emotionally).

And so THAT is also why dear Cath has refused to believe ANYTHING I say abut anything real. The least of all to believe me about dear Fliss and myself and my love for dear Fliss and how much in love we are.

But NOBODY cares about getting dear Fliss and I back together again. And her family especially thwarts any attempts at all. Fliss herself told me that herself.

Fliss PROMISED me in late 2015 we would be soon back together again (after she was 'better' she told me), but she failed to ever contact me ever again. Not a letter, not a word, nothing.

And ALL the things that drive poor dear Fliss crazy here has asailed me every day and night since. I have NOT been having a 'holiday' or a 'rest', and indeed my own life without dear Fliss has become worse a million times worse....to the point of suicide being the only option.

Fliss has also been at this point in her past but I helped her overcome all that, but life's tragedy's kept occuring here to us both, people we loved dying, vert dear animals we absolutely loved they too dying, our own finances all destroyed and leading us into absolute poverty of which we never overcame.

People reading that above, or other people hearing that from Fliss...they ALL instantly BLAME ME! - ME1? - The one and only thing that kept poor dear Fliss in mind, body and soul together, and who ws always ather side forever holding her physically and figurately, when NOBODY else would, not even her own family, not her dearest friends (no, not even you dear Cath), when NOBODY helped dear Fliss I was the only one but dear Fliss has a severe problem in that she beleves that only SHE has the ability to dig herself out of any 'hole' in life, and she also totally forgets all my help in helping her to become so strong in mind and soul when all others wanted her destroyed.

I'm sorry, I'm crying right now all throughout typing all this. Nobody cares. Nobody gets Fliss and I back togther again. And I am in damned hell, figuratively and Literally. A prison of today would be paradise compared to the hell I am in.

Poor Sam has come and sat behind my chair. He knows I am so upset and crying and wants to offer his support. That is the ONLY thing that has prevented me from ending it all. Poor dear Sam & dear Max. The 'children' of dear Fliss and I whom we both love and protect. They sleep on my bed each night and are there to comfort me all the time as I am crying in the deapest sorrow and utter despair but it is a poor consolation to dearest Fliss not being with me.

Of Fliss I have no idea what has become of her. EVERYONE REFUSES to tell me ANYTHING about dear Fliss, EVERYONE, and what makes it worse is that NOBODY TALKS TO ME.

The woman I stil love with all my heart and soul and have never wavered from, the woman who I was to legally wed, the woman who I went with to see her parents more than once on the other side of Ausralia from this hellhole but they could never understand why I loved dear Fliss. They alwasy thought I was trying to 'exploit her' or worse, I don't know, nobody told me anything abut anything and still tells me nothing.

I have no contact WITH ANYONE.

I have been written-out of living and existance, and refused to be allowed to exist.

I have lived my life the way my dear dead mother always did and teched me, to help all others for no reward or expected, to trust all others as much as you can, to help all others who will never ever know you are helping them, to live humbly, to live and not want for luxury or wealth but to exist and be truthful to yourself, and God will take care of you and us no matter what, no matter how hard everything is.

Oh how I used to believe all that.......

I'm sorry, I'm crying too hard again to see the keyboard. Poor Sam is crying now too.

I am going to lay down and pray in within my sobs to die again.

Please let me die. And take goof care of poor Sam & poor Max and think about poor Fliss. And spare a kind thought for my arrogant brother Robert who suffers in his own way in silence and absolute stoicism. And truies to hide his pain under all that with all his meagere money weath fr more than he ver tells me of. Spare a thooght to the last surviving chicken all alone in the backyard here where all the others have died.

The criminals are all frolicking about outside, just as they have been everyday. An anonymous sedan is parked keeping watch over them (departmental? of Police?) in the Koongamia school carpark once again.

I no longer want to keep telling about this hellhole. But nobody listens, nor have they listened for decades, not even when huge bushfires have been lit by them threatening homes and property and lives, nor the constant crime they do day and night, and how indulged they all are by nameless 'authorities'.

Fliss saw a lot of this herself. It drove her to despair. It's of no matter to be a good honest sincere person anymore at this hellhole, it's a hindrance and an anchor around your neck and a target on your back.

I love you dear Fliss and want to be with you just as you once sincerely promised me.

Going to lay down now and hope to die......but I never do because this is fucking shitty hell.........

Der FLiss...you PROMISED YOU WOUL WOULD KEEP PEROSNA CONTA ME WITH ME.....YOU PROMISED.!!!!

Do no br suirprised ehen I turn up dead aty by my om hand

Peter R. Bryce. (25//06/1069 Felciity A. Carthew. Koongamia, Western Austalia, Tamwiorth, New Suth Walees, Audtrlaia Queesnaland, Australaia.

15:56--Friday, 16-March-2018.

aEND

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DETH/////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////

[from-princess-to-darkness-blog]

I don’t wana hurting people, so I’m hurting my self

I don’t wanna hurting people, so I’m hurting them and myself by doing nothing. I have a boyfried. 

He is so perfect. He is smart, has perfect body, like reading, have o lot of interests. I actualy don’t know why he is with me. 

A lot of people telling me that I am pretty, but I don’t beleve them. People are telling me that I am perfect girl for dating because I’m sarcastic and honest. And they don’t mind my emotions. They are ok with fact that i am not ok. 

But beeing fine with something doesn’t mean support, it mean that they will talk to you exept you feel sucked. 

My boyfried is one of them. He “likes” me exept I have fucking emotions. But he don’t care. he don’t wana talk. Just staring on my cut legs by tack (don’t sure with that word), but saying nothing. Just staring. He wrote me that he don’t undersand. I tried to explain, that this pain is much better. But he is happy in his life. He don’t understand. 

I wnat to talk to someone. I need it. 

And then there is my friend. The only (who I can name that way). He listnes. He maybe don’t understad but he’s trying to help. He can make smile on my face, the true one. I think that I am fall in love with him because he’s the only sunshine in my life. We can chatting all night and it’s still fun. But evern that I feel lonely. 

I don’t want to lose my friend with telling him that I like him ore than friend. I don’t have power to break up with my boyfriend. I’m bad person. 

I’m scared. I don’t want hurt my boyfriend because he’s kind. I don’t want to pulling my friend in some decition. 

But this is ruining me.