#Lore time motherfuckers

[eyes-that-see-all]

”What is it you two want exactly? I know you assholes are planning something. After what you did to my brother…”

Signed Neptune

“Ah it’s good to see you again Nep. And I do believe what we have planned is none of your concern. And ah yes how is little Jupes doing?”

[write-it-motherfuckers]

Person A: "So, how did you two meet?"

Person B: "...You know, we actually legally can't answer that."

[gothams-problem-children]

[asteria7fics]

I strongly believe that people who hate Kyle, and/or people who ship two-sided Kyman have never had someone in their friend group that they unironically could not stand, but still tried to see the good in them because having one bad friend isn't as bad as potentially having no friends at all.

Double points if that motherfucker developed a crush on you.

[talentforlying]

one of these days i'm going to write up all that i've changed from azzarello's bullshit era and the one (1) piece i've kept from milligan (and also changed) and the only thing currently stopping me is that it is going to be so, so inside-baseball incomprehensible. and i almost never want to go reading/screencapping azzarello and milligan to add references but i Want to add references.

canon is goop, just know that we continue to ride the bus down "hellblazer ended at #250 and looks like swiss cheese before that" street.

[1980ssunflower]

bwahh miss eddie tbh

[moe-broey]

Another half-cooked ramble I just didn't put into words til Right Now though that's worth mentioning is like. I feel like Moe wouldn't fall into the Hayato/Ricken category of character, where they're small and heavily implied to be younger, and a good chunk of their character is trying to "prove otherwise" (aka "Don't treat me like a kid!" ect ect). I feel like Moe would fall closer into whatever category Takumi is. Not talking tsundere trope, but talking about what being the youngest (Takumi's case: 2nd youngest) sibling in a larger family does to a motherfucker. The adoration and aspiration and idolization combined with the inferiority complex and sometimes even resentment (depends on who we're talking about here) and feeling like you need to pull your weight More and Better. Acknowledging you've undeniably had it easier at the cost of your older siblings but somehow still feeling overlooked and left behind and forgotten. Or, in some cases, feeling like you got way more than you deserved, that even though you objectively got the "better" deal, it was still Unfair. Moe is just chronically the youngest of five. And don't even get me STARTED about [redacted] but let me just say The Absence of something is also A Presence. The Takumi comparison is extremely apt.

[bending-sickle]

it's a good thing i'm pretty sure i'm not in a simulation because in the past week i have had one book and three (3) contemporary podcasts talk about incorruptible saints

our lady of the lost and found (2001), diane schoemperlen

“incorruptibles” (season 2, episode 33; may 29, 2023), monstertalk

“legends 2: undead lovers” (episode 230; may 29, 2023), lore

“side stories: the ‘uncorrupt’ nun” (episode 827; june 1, 2023), last podcast on the left

[bonebrokebuddy]

YOU.

Psst hi I need everyone to check out and follow my twin @bonebrokebuddy their dc thoughts are rad as hell

[tepkunset]

Until Dawn makes me uncomfortable...

...Not in a "this is good horror" way. In a "who gave you the fucking right to ruin our spiritual legends" way.

Some context, first: I am a Mi'kmaw person, and my people are among the Algonquians who have traditional legendary stories about ice cannibals. My people call them J*nuaq (singular: J*nu) also often anglicized as Ch*nook (singular: Ch*noo), but they are most commonly known under the Ojibwe name, W*ndigoag (singular: W*ndigo). Now that I've shared those names, I will for the rest of this post simply refer to them as "ice cannibals" out of respect for those who practice the avoidance of referring to them by name, which some people do and some don't.

Obviously there are variations among nations in how these beings are depicted, but I can guarantee you that this thing from Until Dawn...

...Is not very accurate. It may not be as bad as the whole antlers thing commonly tacked on by white horror writers, but ice cannibals are not stereotypical zombies either, or whatever the hell this thing is.

The ice cannibal I am personally familiar with is described as a giant, emaciated person with an icy heart and incredible Power. They used to be one of the People, but were transformed through either cannibalism or through an evil spirit. Now they are monstrous beings who kill and eat people.

But let's for a second pretend that Until Dawn is 100% accurate in its depiction of these ice cannibals. That doesn't change the fact that the writers, as white people, have no fucking right to even so much as touch these spirits in their story. Algonquian peoples have made it clear time and again that these beings are not for outsiders to fictionalize. They are not your cryptid. They are not your aesthetic. They are not anything that is yours.

And writer Larry Fessenden? He's a repeat offender. This motherfucker is obsessed with ice cannibals. He wrote the 2001 film W*ndigo. He wrote the racist 2008 Fear Itself episode "Skin and Bones" featuring them again. And his biggest claim to fame is Until Dawn, which of course, he pulls out the same shit a third time.

On top of all this, the whole "totem" collection theme in the game is more appropriative bullshit and a classic case of the Tipis and Totem Poles trope. Supposedly the mountain the story takes place on is a sacred place to the Cree in the lore of the game. And yet it's full of Pacific Northwest Indigenous totem-like things?

So anyway. I really don't care how accurate or inaccurate the upcoming film adaptation of Until Dawn is. I don't want anything to do with it, and I personally hope it flops.

[boatswainscall]

WARFRAME 1999 SPOILERS AHEAD

I quickly referenced the Voidtongue glyphs to refresh myself on their associated stanzas and I was able to translate the ones from the countdown screen at the end of the quest

Fass, Netra, (????), Lohk, Vome, Xata and Jahu

"Roiling, moaning, this realm of ours / In madness lost shall die Carrion Hordes trill their profane / Accord with Eldritch Plans (????) From brooding Gulfs are we beheld / By that which bears no name To cosmic madness laws submit / Though stalwart minds entreat Its heralds are the stars it fells / The Sky and Earth aflame Corporeal laws are unwrit / As suns and love retreat"

So Drifter reversing time deleted the "in madness lost shall die" but the remainder are in the same order as before - unless their head is blocking Fass (which is possible)

Which leaves of course the motherfucker Khra OR Ris as the one missing. Aka "To cosmic forms from tangent planes / We end as we began." or "In luminous space blackened stars / They gaze, accuse, deny"

Here they go again spelling out the plot with the Reqiuem murmurs

The Reqiuem Mods and their poem stanzas + associated Voidtongue terms might be the single most brilliant addition to Warframe's lore, added in an update completely fucking unrelated to the Void and BEFORE Albrecht was introduced as a character. God I love it.

[a-scary-lack-of-common-sense]

What is the lore on the cast on his foot?

It’s from the same car crash that gave him the chip in his tooth!

Basically, when Ford blasted his brain with Project Mentem, it reacted very badly because: 1. His head wound from his previous (attempted) surgery wasn’t fully closed, and 2. He had tampered with the machine to make its effects more potent.

But, then I thought to myself: wow, there is no way this motherfucker realistically survived malnutrition, sleep deprivation, mutilation (from Bill), a botched auto-brain surgery (in unsanitary conditions) AND getting basically electrocuted until his brain scrambled. I mean, plot armour is cool and all, but this seems a little excessive.

So, I was like: how can I get this guy to go to the hospital without having to call an ambulance to his place, and accidentally reveal the existence of the portal to the authorities wayyy too early in the timeline?

Solution? Hit him with a car.

[No blood version.]

So this is what happens: Ford wakes back up in his underground lab, disoriented, confused, and overwhelmed. In his dazed delirium, he somehow manages to leave his shack and finds himself staggering around in the woods aimlessly. Then, he walks into the road and gets hit by a car. He is sent to the hospital, and he gets a little bit better with their treatment so that he isn’t on the brink of death (although they were unable to pry the metal out of his head without causing serious issues). But ultimately, he freaks out when he wakes up in the hospital like a week later and instantly ditches the place, rushing back into the town streets. His injuries weren’t fully healed by the time he woke up though, so he was stuck with the cast and the chip in his front tooth.

[ganondoodle]

this is what im referring to btw

this is the worst excuse you could have come up with

"the civilization in botw and totk is totally different" also gets me bc .... what the fuck do you mean i thoguht those were the same people, i mean, they dont FEEL like the same people so i guess they're right in way???

nigh every old character acts out of character and all any NPC cares about is being an annoying sonau fangirl but no no its totally a sequel, why the fuck do you keep insisting on the games being a direct sequel, just say they are a majoars mask deal where its the same but also isnt at all instead of trying to gaslight me into the believing its an actuel sequel

me: finally im able to cope with how much i hate totk and can fuel that energy into other things :)

nintendy: the shiekah tech just dissappeared and no one knows why or cares enough to investigate it lol. lmao. its gone bc the calamity is gone or something even tho it literally isnt bc ganondorf is right there haha lol, stop asking, why do you care. just forget it existed and look at that sexy goatman and glue instead!! glue! isnt that wild?? also its totally a direct, 100% same universe and exact same characters, despite them act totally out of character, sequel to botw-

[venomous-qwille]

Does it ever feel weird to you to have this whole big fandom around your ocs and your fanfic? Like, so many people looking at them and wanting a piece of the pie and drawing/writing them?

Okay so, yeah.

It is incredibly humbling that so many people are inspired by GITM- like, wow. The art and writing and crafts that people create blow my mind every day and I'm incredibly fortunate to have people so interested in my OCs and their lore and their designs. It's honestly hard to comprehend. However... Some people (and let me be clear that it is a very very very small minority of people) are fucking atrocious. They treat GITM like its a big ticket TV show and like I'm a content farm. The entitlement is fucking capital I Insane. I have had motherfuckers say in spaces that I AM IN that I don't get to have boundaries because 'when something gets big you lose ownership over it'. And honestly, move over cunt this is a 2k kudos fic on Ao3 not Harry Fucking Potter. That sounds mean, but really, the amount of boundary crossing and shit people have done behind my back (and to my face) because they think they are somehow entitled to my characters and my time and my creative energy has genuinely at points made me want to stop writing entirely. But then I just have a little cry, do a magma with my friends and remember that for every shitlord, there are one hundred wonderful people who are deeply respectful in how they engage with my story, who care deeply about my characters and my boundaries. I feel like this ask has been more /neg than /pos so I want to reiterate, I am so SO fucking lucky that people love GITM so much. Everytime someone shares a theory or a piece of art with me, my heart jumps and I do a little dance. This story and 'fandom' (still crazy that its technically a fandom) have massively improved my life and my mental health. I have met so many wonderful friends for life through the community and honestly, even if it ended tomorrow I'd have zero regrets <3

[gotta-get-back-to-hatchetfield]

Help! I loved Nerdy Prudes Must Die and am curious about Nightmare Time but don't really have time to commit to watching it all... (a handy guide)

For those of you who don't know Nightmare Time was a series of Hatchetfield one shots that starkid wrote and recorded during lockdown, all of which are of course available for free on YouTube. They go a lot deeper into the lore than the 3 Hatchetfield musicals, including explaining and explore the characters we know and love in more detail, sometimes including shocking revelations.

They also introduce new characters to the Hatchetfield universe, including Stephanie Lauter, Grace Chasity and Pete Spankoffski, who we first met in a Nightmare Time episode.

As they were filmed in lockdown the recording quality is somewhat variable, but Season 2 has a much higher production value than Season 1, and in Season 1 Episode 1 in particular they were very clearly trying to find their feet with it. That being said the actual scripts and content of the episodes is solid throughout.

I've decided to put together this handy guide of which Nightmare Time episodes people might want to check out if they want to learn more about certain things we saw in NPMD.

1) Nibbly - Honey Queen (season 2 episode 1)

If you're curious to learn more about the Lords in Black each of them (bar Wiggly) have an episode of Nightmare Time devoted to them.

For Nibbly, Wiggly's hungriest and pinkest brother that episode is 'Honey Queen' in Season 2 Episode 1.

It explores a very entertaining rivalry between Linda Monroe (from Black Friday) and Zoey (the annoying barista from Beanie's in TGWDLM) that naturally turns very very dark. We also get to meet Linda's husband Gerald who she spends most of Black Friday on the phone to.

As a heads up Nibbly doesn't appear until, shall we say, the end of the episode (with Hatchetfield there's always a twist) and he's not in the super sexy form from NPMD but it's a very strong episode and does give a bit of background to Nibbly's deal.

2) Tinky - Time Bastard (season 1 episode 2 part 2)

If you're curious to learn more about this yellow motherfucker played by Curt then you're in luck because he's in my personal favourite episode and one with a lot of interesting lore surrounding it.

If you're curious about what he means when in NPMD he says 'I could add another Spankoffski to my set', Time Bastard is focused around Pete's brother Ted (from TGWDLM) and the dodgy dealings of CCRP.

It's an extremely clever episode, with lots of really fun twists. It's unfortunately season 1 so has slightly lower production quality, but in terms of raw scripting is just outstanding and has some really interesting reveals about people in the Hatchetfield universe who may not be who we think they are...

Also worth noting that this is in the same episode (Youtube video) as a different Nightmare Time episode 'Forever and Always'. Most episodes work like this where you have two different stories per episode, they absolutely can be watched independently but usually have some sort of thematic link (in this case it's the things we do for love and how they will inevitably be thwarted by CCRP being sketch).

3) Blinky - Watcher World (season 1 episode 1 part 2)

And if you're curious about the one who's always watching you, he's actually the first Lord in Black we meet through Nightmare Time, in the very first episode when Bill and Alice Woodward (TGWDLM) go on an ill fated trip to a spooky theme park.

Again this is from the first episode so production quality is low but it's a really solid episode and a very interesting look into these characters.

While this is our first meeting of a lord in black in Nightmare Time, I don't believe he's actually referred to as such, and the concept of the Lords in Blacks being introduced as Wiggly's brothers comes in at point 5 on this list.

4) Pokey - Yellow Jacket (season 2 episode 4)

You've already met Pokey through TGWDLM (yep that was his blue shit that destroyed the world!), but you won't truly realise how fucking scary he is until you meet his incarnation 'Otho' in Yellow Jacket.

A solid episode exploring Lex, Hannah and Ethan in a lot more detail, and in a world and lives where (at least at the start of the episode) things seem to be a lot more stable for them than in Black Friday.

And yeh as I've already mentioned Pokey is fucking s c a r y in it. Also you remember James Tolbert's character, Charles that gets a little cameo in Hatchetown? Well he's the main human antagonist of this episode!

We also learn a lot of lore about 'the gift', the thing that makes Hannah able to do magic.

5) The concept of the Lords in Black generally - The Witch in the Web (season 2 episode 3 part 2)

If you're curious about why everyone's been posting pictures of those evil teddy bears and now even more confused that you've met them all as fucked up high school students, the Witch in the Web is the episode where we're first introduced to the 'they don't care bears' as a set.

This is a really cool episode, again about Lex and Hannah, but it also exploring Uncle Wiley (from Black Friday) in a lot more detail.

We also first meet two characters called Duke and Miss Holloway who together form the ship Holloduke that if you were following any of Starkid tumblr during lockdown you will definitely have heard of. They're really cool!

Here we also meet Webby, Hannah's imaginary friend in Black Friday, who turns out to be the lord in black's sister: a queen in white. And she's dope.

6) Pete Spankoffski, Stephanie Lauter and Grace Chasity - Abstinence Camp (season 2 episode 2 part 2)

We first meet the now beloved characters of Pete and Steph and the slightly less beloved character of Grace in an evangelical abstinence only camp. The episode centers entirely around these characters and plays excellently with tropes of the horror genre.

It also has the best song in all of Nightmare Time and it's up to you to decide if I'm talking about 'oh my god it's the axe-man' or 'virginity rocks' (it's both, the answer is both).

That's pretty much it in terms of Nightmare Time episodes that cover things from NPMD, but in case you're curious here's a quick run down of what the rest are about:

The Hatchetfield Ape Man - season 1 episode 1 part 1. Hidgens makes Ted pretend to be a Tarzan style half monkey, half man thing to con Angela Giarratanna out of her inheretence.

Watcher World - season 1 episode 1 part 2. See bullet 3 above. Alice and Bill Woodward go to a theme park and shit hits the fan.

Forever and Always - season 2 episode 2 part 1. Paul and Emma get married. Things are not as they seem (there are robots). One of my personal favourites.

Time Bastard - season 2 episode 2 part 2. See bullet 2 above. Ted fucks with time travel and things end very badly for him. Best episode imo.

Jane's a Car - season 2 episode 3 part 1. Turns out the soul of Tom Houston's ex-wife Jane, who died in a car crash, transferred into the car. This somewhat complicates his budding relationship with Becky Barnes.

The Witch in the Web - season 2 episode 3 part 2. See bullet 5 above. Hannah Foster's having nightmares and somehow a witch and Uncle Wiley are involved. Luckily a good witch (Miss Holloway) is there to try and help.

Honey Queen - season 2 episode 1. See bullet 1 above. Linda Monroe and Zoey Chambers compete to win the Hatchetfield honey queen beauty pageant and things spiral wildly out of control. My personal favourite episode from season 2.

Perky's Buds - season 2 episode 2 part 1. Emma's finally achieved her dream of owning her own pot farm. Just her, her non-binary farm hand Ziggs and some very evil birds.

Abstinence Camp - season 2 episode 2 part 2. See bullet 6 above. Pete, Steph and Grace go to a retreat in the very creepy woods to learn one way or another about the perils of pre-marital sex.

Daddy - season 2 episode 3 part 1. Remember Sherman Young (Jamie's weird creepy guy from Black Friday)? Turns out there's something very weird going on with his mum. We also learn a lot about Frank Pricely (owner of toyzone from Black Friday) in this episode, who turns out to be a very interesting character.

Killer Track - season 2 episode 3 part 2. Miss Holloway must take extreme action to save a young girl and then the whole world against an evil song that kills anyone who listens to it. We learn a lot more about Holloway as a character and she is soooo cool. Another favourite episode of mine.

Yellow Jacket - season 2 episode 4. See bullet point 4. Hannah seeing her sister struggling to provide for them financially decides to find a way of using her power to earn some spare cash.

Hey Melissa - episode aired only on a livestream, type it into youtube and it'll come up. If you've ever found yourself asking 'what if Mariah's secretary character from the start of TGWDLM was really into dom pup play and Paul Matthews was her little pup bitch and she was also a horrific out of control serial killer?' then a) are you Matt Lang because if not I'm concerned? and b) by god this is the episode for you!. I personally really enjoy it I think it's super funny, but obviously heavy trigger warnings for abuse and sexual content warnings (there's a reason they didn't put this in the real series). Fucking excellent tho.

[thewertsearch]

TC: all my life i believed at a fuckin paradise to come what held the most baller, darkest of carnivals to join. TC: AND A PROPHECY TC: to tell all about a band of rowdy and capricious minstrels steeped in the good harshwhimsy. TC: THE MIRTHFUL MESSIAHS WERE FORETOLD TO BE CRASHING THAT FUCKING PIE STAND AND BRING THE HOLY RUCKUS. […] TC: I'M TALKING ABOUT THE VAST HONK, YOU BLASPHEMOUS MOTHERFUCKER.

I suppose I have to take Gamzee's cult a lot more seriously now - which means I should probably at least try to figure out what it is they actually believe.

It appears as if their doctrine is centered around some sort of prophecy, concerning a group of legendary figures known as 'mirthful messiahs'. They're fated to release the Vast Honk - and, in doing so, create some sort of Juggalo paradise.

We don't know any lore about the Vast Honk, but its name sets up intentional parallels with Gl'bgolyb's apocalyptic Vast Glub, as well as the Vast Croak, a holy sound emitted by newborn Genesis Frogs. Both of these sounds accompany enormous, galaxy-shaking cosmic events, so the Honk is presumably no different.

Alternia's First Guardian was 'corrupted' by a genome of the same name, presumably changing him from a standard Sburb NPC into the English cultist we all know and tolerate.

Could the Vast Honk be released by someone corrupted in a similar manner? We already know that Jade's Genesis Frog was spliced with some unknown DNA; it's terrifyingly plausible that said DNA was planted by Scratch, Gamzee, or English himself. There's a very real possibility that the Vast Honk will come from the mouth of Jade's frog.

TC: BUT NOW. TC: because of you. TC: BECAUSE OF ALL YOU AND YOUR FUCKING OUTRAGEOUSNESS. TC: you stole up all my miracles away by revealing at me how the wicked shit was really kicked. TC: LIKE SOME FILTHY FUCKING SCIENSTIFF WHO AT OLD TIMES WOULD BE RULED UNFUNNY WITHOUT EVEN GETTING HIS FUCKING TRIAL ON. TC: and now i don't know what to think about the spiritual fantasies i had.

Anyway, Gamzee can’t seem to reconcile his worldview with this pair of alien rappers who seem to cruelly parody his beliefs.

He’s always been dimly aware of his fictional nature, and as his mind begins to clear, it is forced to confront the possibility that this is all his religion ever was. A viral video and a meme.

For once, he doesn't think it's a very funny joke.

TC: I HAVE THE IDEA THAT YOU PUT IN MY PAN TO SIT THERE. TC: that the paradise planet TC: IS A FUCKING JOKE. TC: and the miracles TC: ARE FAKE. TC: pure fiction. TC: FALSE FAKEY FRAUDY CON JOBS FROM A BUNCH OF UNFUNNY NINJA HARLEQUIN BULLSHIT ARTISTS.

It would be remiss of me not to bring up the possibility that ICP are non-trivially involved with Homestuck's plot. I mean, Betty Crocker is now a key figure in multiple characters’ backstories, so fucking anything is possible at this point.

Joseph Bruce and Joseph Utsler could literally be the mirthful messiahs, and I have no idea what that could mean. I might actually have to listen to their albums to understand the comic.