#Literally so feral for them it’s ridiculous
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athymelyreply · 2 years ago
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*banging pots and pans* HOBRINTHIAN TIME, COME GET YOUR HOBRINTHIAN HERE
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coridallasmultipass · 4 months ago
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I am once again begging online shop payment processing companies to allow me to enter a separate name for shipping and separate name for billing!!
It's the same address, I'm just trans and have not legally changed my personal name, but I still prefer to receive mail as my preferred name! Like it's literally my professional name, I do business as my preferred name.
Annoying as fuck, and I don't want to chance my bank rejecting the payment (though I'm sure someone at my bank has put a note to allow it on my account by now, since I've contacted them a couple times before when I realized too late that the billing section didn't let me input another "address/name" section, and they said the payment was fine in those cases.)
Anyway, legal name changes should be free and non-advertised for everyone. Tbh, you should get a free name change every time you file your taxes on time as an incentive for good citizen behaviour. Once I am elected pres-
#i think the one i just used didnt even have a separate billing address option which makes no sense#guess they dont want anyone giving any gifts making the buyer pay twice for shipping like that#maybe it was a fault of the mobile browser but i highly doubt it since many desktop sites look like mobile browsers these days#just so fucking frustrating. what if i lived somewhere where my legal name would out me? (im in the closet rn so doesnt matter)#i dont want to fucking see my legal name. im already forced to see it everywhere else.#i dont wanna ruin my mood on a day when im supposed to be getting a package which should be a happy thing yknow#vent#transphobia#speaking of like i would change my name but i dont want to and cant afford the fucking ridiculous price for it#and i dont wanna advertise it in a newspaper either! shits expensive as fuck on top of the hundreds to file the court paperwork!#i already tried to do it once with money in hand and the receptionist told me that even tho it was for gender identity i could not...#...avoid the newspaper thing unless i also changed my legal gender marker. and i had to back out bc i have reproductive health problems#i dont want a gender marker change to fuck with my getting healthcare#(i did change the gender letter on my ID card later tho which only took a signature on a paper no hassle with anything)#it really really fucking sucks how all these little things add up all the time#especially when im closeted while living w family who wont even use my preferred name#the real kicker is that. both my dad and his dad used preferred names. my dad used his middle name#and i use part of my middle name. yet my dad even in death still gets the dignity of being called his preferred name and i dont#sexism at its finest#reasons why i dont even hint at being trans around my moms side bc i already got bullied by them for wanting to use my middle name#ive literally been asking them to call me my mid name since i was 12. and theyve been acting like im trying to be someone else#its the same middle name on my birth certificate they gave me. i dont understand why they wouldnt want me to use it#but yeah i stay closeted bc i dont wanna deal with the name drama amplified exponentially for gender#prob get kicked out too cuz theyre queerphobic as fuck and i cant work rn and dont have a car#id have to just go full feral and live in the woods with the lizards where i belong#Cori.exe#Post.exe#fuck lol just looked it up and u cant change ur first name if u get married. i cant avoid the fucking fee man. let me be cori#literally why is it cheaper to get married than change ur first name! bullshit! marriage has so much more legal implications#transphobic queerphobic aromanticphobic privacyphobic poorphobic shit ass fucking state ive literally been cori most of my life ffs cmon
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dilf-docs · 1 month ago
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All Roads Lead To Rome
pedro pascal x younger!reader
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summary: your boyfriend swears he isn't annoyed at your little surprise visit on the set of gladiator II; you might have to help him release his anger, one way... or another.
warnings: 18+ (minors dni), age gap (BARK BARK BARK), smut, p. in v., bit of exhibition kink cause they fuck on his trailer, he swears he's mad but he just wants head, oral (m. receiving), he also uses his armor and skirt while at it bc its hot and not bc i totally want that to happen to me or smth!!!, brat taming, orgasm denial, breeding and daddy kink lowkey, i'm so down bad for him so there's fluff!!! + pedro being whipped cause that's exactly what i want in my men, the cast makes cameos bc i love them!!! use of spanish (i'm latina so don't even try me), pedro wearing a skirt tehee
word count: 3,519 words
side note: i'm about as FERAL and horny as much as one could be!!! damn u pedro, making me walk out in the middle of class and walk on foot to the nearest theather for an early gladiator II screening (bc they're cheaper and i'm a jobless broke student lmao) that mind u it's my first solo trip to the movies but it's okay!!!! nobody interrupt me on my horny dilf hours amirite I TELL U that cinema was almost empty: just me, pedro and hey there's a spot if u wanna join mescal (look at my blog banner IYKYK) so yeah!!!! enjoy this porn lovechild that steemed from it; my pedro renaissance that'd been asleep since tlou dropped AWAKES (u don't get it, i literally watched narcos just for him) i'm so fr i need this man BIBLICALLY!!
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"Lemme guess, that's her, right?"
Pedro looks up from his phone, slightly red and embarrassed. He would blame the color on the sun, and as an actor, fake his way out.
"No idea what you're talking about, Paul"
The young man chuckles.
"I mean, every break we get, you take your chair, sit the farthest and pull your phone with the most ridiculous grin I've ever seen. I'm afraid to tell you, friend, you aren't as slick as you think"
He leans back against the chair, covering his face with his large palm.
"At least I tried" he finds no point in lying anymore, "seems like I'm addicted, but if it wasn't for y/n, I wouldn't touch it"
"I'm curious, though" Paul scoots his chair closer, "who texts who? You or her?"
"Me" he answers, but then corrects himself quickly, a bit ashamed of how that makes him sound, "but it's mostly her first".
"Right" he doesn't sound convinced, rather curious and annoyed, something he's too old and tired for, "I don't believe you"
He's about to lock his phone, but the wallpaper (a selfie with you) would probably earn him another mock from Mescal.
"Too bad I don't need you to"
Before he can do so, the irish man yanks his phone away.
"Give it back!" he shouts, earning a few glances from the crew around them, "what are you, ten?"
"No, twenty-eight" they look like kids bickering. "No need to fight me, Mr. Pascal, they haven't taught us the new fighting choreography yet" he mocks, before the phone chimes; they both stop at the sound.
"What does this mean?" Paul asks. "Malta's nice" he reads out loud, "were you talking about possible future vacations? I might have to tag along"
He doesn't follow the man's joke, instead, looking at the message on your chat. Malta's nice, says the little cryptic message, and yes―it is cryptic, because you were just talking about missing each other and some other corny stuff he'd take to his grave. Not vacations, and certainly, not about the european island, which happens to also be the place were he's filming his latest movie.
"No, we weren't" he replies confused, "what do you think it means?"
"Well, obviously, you boys don't know anything" May pops up from behind, laughing.
"Were you eavesdropping?" he asks playfully, albeit, a little offended.
"No, you guys are just too loud" she replies nonchalant. "Besides, you aren't very good at hiding it, either"
"That's what I said!" Paul backs, laughing on his face.
"Stop being misterious and just drop it"
"It means" she pauses―laughing at her own little dramatic effect, "that you're getting a visit soon"
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When you met Pedro, you were working in The Last Of Us. Nothing fancy, just part of the technical cast of the show: helping with the filming and stuff.
During those months, it was easy to find yourself falling for the main star (alongside Bella Ramsey), especially when you spent months behind a camera, capturing all of his perfect features; learning them by memory until you could draw them without seeing his face.
Yes, you had fallen for the older man, because it was as natural as breathing; easy as being alive―the fall so gentle and so easy, it was hard to know when the feelings started. You just woke up one day, feeling different.
You liked to act up―always had what you wanted, and times had changed (so it's not like he had to ask first): why not? Which is why during your last day of shooting you took some liquid courage on your veins and went up his way. It was at a little gathering the crew you've grown to call family organized, while wearing your favorite and tightest dress, that you approached him.
It surprised you that he even recognized you, but that's who he was: warm, welcoming and caring.
To augment the surprise, turns out he had eyed you already, but was too shy to do anything. Yes, the worlds most famous Chilean man. It did stroke your ego, and maybe that's why you feel like most of the time, you've got the upper hand on your relationship, despite the years in between.
Still, you feel like the last message you just sent was a bit too blunt. Now you sit at the tiny airport, pondering your next move.
You know your boyfriend isn't exactly the type to scold or get mad―despite his strong figure, but going against the only thing he asked you might test him. Which is why you feel nervous, despite the happiness around you, everyone in the airport looking straight out of a picture perfect summer edition magazine.
And your theory is proven exactly right when you arrive impromptu at the Gladiator II set: making heads turn and guards almost kick you out, thinking you're a fan.
"You don't get it!" you protest, "he's my boyfriend".
"Sure", they laugh on your face. "you're not the first to say that".
"She's not lying" oh, how you love that gravely voice. But not today: not when he sounds like a parent scolding a naive child. Not when his eyes bore into you, slightly irritated.
So now he's dragging you among the set, right to were his trailer is.
"Aren't you going to introduce me?" you ask, puffing your cheeks out in annoyance. He keeps dragging you by the arm, without sparing a glance in your way. Who does he think he is? "I wanted to tell Paul he made me cry―twice. You know I don't play about Normal People and Aftersun"
"But you do seem to play about my orders" he grunts out, opening the door to his trailer. The sunlight reflects against the white, slightly bothering your eyes with its shine, contrary to your boyfriend's gloomy behaviour.
"Are you being serious right now? You're not my dad to scold me. I just wanted to surprise you" you stand still, refusing to get inside. Pedro knows your character tends to be stubborn, and thought he finds it hot to reel you up sometimes, there are other times where he can't just stand that juvenile spirit of rage you tend to have when things don't go the way you want them to. "What's gotten into you?"
"I could ask you the same" he mocks. "Get inside. Now"
"Rude" you scoff, but obey regardless, and he breathes out relieved you didn't do a scene like last time; he still can't show his face on that restaurant to this day.
"I thought you'd be happy to see me" you say a tad bit dissapointed, and Pascal feels the pissed off feelings clouding his brain start to dissipate.
"I do, amor" he sighs, "just hate to see you do things I tell you not to; waltzing in here like you own the place".
You don't see the mistake, though. What's wrong with wanting to do a little surprise? It's not like you were a stalker or something; just a very clingy girlfriend who happens to miss her boyfriend.
"So, you're not mad?" you venture, "tell me you're not embarrassed"
He looks at you, the fondness of his gaze betraying him.
"I'm not the one wearing a skirt while trying to sound intimidating" you joke while caressing the crook of his nose, knowing you always get on his good side. Being mad isn't something that lasts, "if anyone should be embarrassed, that's you"
"Are you saying I shouldn't wear one because I'm a man?" your boyfriend looks offended, "Have you forgotten the movie I'm starring in? People feared the skirt-wearing Roman army"
"Well, I'm not intimidated" you stand defiant, and something dark tints his brown eyes. You can feel the excitement begin pooling in your stomach.
"You're not?" he grips your wrists and yanks you to him, then holds your chin, tilting your head between his calloused fingers. "Well, cariño, you should be"
Your body slams against one of the trailers walls, and you have to suppress a whine.
"You must be punished for what you did today"
You give him a doe-eye look, pretending to be all innocent, as if you weren't enjoying the punishment.
"I don't know what you're talking about. I've been a good girl"
"You know exactly what I'm talking about" he clicks his tongue, "don't play dumb with me"
"I just came to visit you" you murmur, voice husky against his ear. He grunts, and with the proximity, his hard-on rasps against your bare legs, only partly covered by the flowy summer dress you're wearing, "is that so bad?"
"It is. Has sido mala, cariño" his hand travels down under your dress, carresing with his large palm the silhoutte of your ass. The rings on his fingers create a shock, cold metal against your warm sun-bathed skin. "Naughty girl"
"I promise I'll be good, papi" you purr, using that honeyed voice of yours that makes it hard: hard to say no and hard between his pants.
Pedro sits on a small couch he has inside the trailer, guiding you with his hand enveloped around yours, motioning you to follow with a care so soft, you'd doubt he's about to do to you what he is about to do to you. He pulls you across his lap, smiling (God, you love his smile) as your stomach presses against his tights.
"Don't worry" he breathes low, his voice barely above a whisper. "I'll make you a good girl. Tell me, aren't you?"
You swallow, "I am"
He moves the panties easily to the side, rubbing your pussy a little. He then spanks it softly, making you mewl at the sting.
Pedro continues to trace over it, "Are you sure about that?"
"N-no" you shiver in delight, resolve dissolving as quick as it came. "I'm naughty"
"It's good to be aware" he murmurs, "Dilo otra vez"
"I'm a naughty girl"
He lifts your head by your hair. "Tell me what you did"
"Disobeyed your orders, coming to the set" you whisper. He lets go of your hair, his hands traveling down again, slowly teasingly rubbing your pussy while he humms.
"You were a little brat, amor"
You whimpered and mewled in delight. "I was a very naughty brat"
He pushed his fingers inside you, plunging his fingers into your pussy.
"Look at you. You're soaking wet" he pumped his fingers in you, making you moan, "Is that why you came to see me? Couldn't wait any longer for daddy to be inside of you?"
You bucked a little, making him stop. He drags his fingers out, causing you to beg for him to go back.
"Answer my question you greedy thing" He leaned closer to your ear. "Did you need my cock this much?"
You whimper, "I do! Missed you so much"
He pushed his fingers back into you, provoking a moan out of you.
"You're always so needy for me" your core tenses, making you shiver. "How badly do you want me? Tell me"
You whimpered "Badly, papi"
"Say it" his face contorts in satisfaction at your pathethic display; crying little mess, "Who's cock, fingers and mouth make you feel good?"
You can't think at this point, your brain fuzzy and pussy hot, leaking. You kiss his lips, moaning against them, "you!"
"Just me, yes? Nobody else can make you feel this good?"
"No one!"
You involuntarily roll your hips to aid you in pleasure, yet Pedro stops you just before you can reach your orgasm.
"Little brat." he tuts, making you groan. "Did you think I'd let you? You were naughty today, baby"
You huff in annoyance, used to having your way.
"That's your punishment"
"But I'll behave" you mewl against his ear, "I promise"
“Good, because I'm planning on fucking your brains out” his hot breathe whispers in your ear seductively, trying his best not to slur the words at the drunken haze that your arousal provokes in him, "but you have to help me first"
You get on your knees, looking at the garment he's wearing. The skirt and general costume makes this all the more hot, mouth watering at the sight. You raise the skirt, glancing at the briefs; just seeing his dick strained against the fabric makes you wet in anticipation.
He sees the pleasure bore into your orbs, and before you do any dirty idea of yours, he's already warning:
"You have to take this off, what if we-"
"Alright" you cut him off, "but the skirt stays"
"Sigue, pues" he growls, voice low yet demanding, following you in your little game.
As you pull the briefs down, his erection springs out enthusiastically, slapping up against his lower abdomen. You shifted your gaze up to meet his, his eyelids heavy and his proud smirk driving you absolutely wild.
"That's right" he chokes out, "show me how much you missed it"
You give him a proud lick, and Pedro hisses at the moment his preseminal fluid goes in between your hungry lips.
Your tongue darts to the head of his cock, running over it several times before bobbing your head down, taking most of him in your mouth. He keeps praising as you pump the base of his cock with your hand. Your head bobs, yet you peek up to hear Pascal's little sounds and facial expression, a motivation so intimate in the way his brows furrow and eyes roll, mouth agape at your movements while his lip suck on those pretty lips of his. It makes you keep going. With every bob you take as much of him in your mouth as you can, before slowly moving your way back up to the tip, increasing your suction the closer to his head you got. A throaty moan escapes the man above you when you now focus on the final lick, making him closer to coming, all while maintaining eye contact the entire way through.
"Don't do that" he rasps, yanking you by the hair again, as of punishment, but he knows you enjoy it, "you promised you'd be good"
You can't answer, so instead, you reach the head of his cock again, and now his eyes roll back, mumbling profanities that sound like heaven.
"Do you want them to hear us, brat? Qué necia eres" he manages to chastise while moaning.
You feel his dick stuck in your throat, and the way he's about to come; you think that after some time dating, you know him well enough.
You're about to leave with your mouth when he stops you.
"No" your eyes open in shock, "what? Did you think your punishment is over?" Pedro laughs, "don't look at me like that. Like you have never done it before"
He keeps you in place by the hair, the rings prickling against your scalp. You feel his muscles tense up, and before you can think anything else thick and hot shots of cum invade your mouth, making it sticky and warm.
"Don't pretend you don't like it" his voice goes dark, husky. "Swallow it all. Te han enseñado a no desperdiciar nada, ¿verdad? Show me your good manners, then"
When you pull out, your throat feels raspy.
"You gotta reward me" you cough out.
"I promised, didn't I?" his fingers trace your face delicately, with adoration.
"It's all about duty, General Acacius" you purr, and the dick springs out again. Hard.
"Princess..." he warns.
"For the glory of Rome" you joke and laugh, then cough, as your throat is still sore.
"Have you been reading my script?" as you avoid to answer, he just chuckles, "ay, nena"
"C'mere" he motions, and you sit on his lap again. Pedro lifts your dress, exploring the curve of your ass. There's anticipation as he hooks his finger around the waistband of your panties, pulling them down to access your core.
"Fuck" you squirm at his touch, grinding your freed cunt against his hard cock. He grabs you by the hip, adjusting you right on his lap.
"You taste so good" he kisses down your throat, ending at the chest were your tits peak.
"Want them?" you offer, pulling your dress down. He kisses them, gently nipping at your perked up nipples.
A wave of pleasure courses through you, and with whines and moans, you show how desperate you are, the hunger making the meal taste better. After all those weeks missing him, you just want him to fuck you senseless.
His lips are rosy and swollen against yours, mouths clashing; starved of the yearned contact. Truth is, no matter how much you know how to touch yourself, it'll never be the same as having his hard cock tear through your tight folds.
Pedro easily aligns his leaking cock with your uncovered pussy, all while mantaining the kiss. He pushes down on you, your dripping cunt taking all of his rock-hard cock, fingers holding onto the soft brown grey sprinkled locs.
"Pedro" you cry out his name, full of ecstasy as the stretch burns so sweetly. His low grunts only fuel your desire.
You trace with your eyes his body, now bare without the upper part of the costume: his pecs and abs, flexing with every pump. With now free hands, your fingers travel to softly caress his stomach, even if your tits are jiggling and the pace is rather frenetic.
"I miss your tummy" you pout.
"I miss eating too" he whispers out, tiredly. He's reminded of his old age, forgetting about it as soon as you two kiss, because you bring out a stamina he thinks he doesn't have anymore; almost animalistic. His bones creak and adding the tiring filming day under the hot sun, he feels his body start to give up, the orgams closer and closer.
"No matter how you look" you clash your lips onto his, the adoration translating through the smile you press against, a trail of saliva that symbolizes how interwined you are, "you always look so fucking good"
He blushes, feeling like a stupid school boy with a crush. What did he even do to deserve you? Never thought a pretty young wild thing like you would even spare a glance on his way, but now you're taking all of his cock inside with such greed yet loom into his eyes with a love he's only dreamed of.
You're real, and his.
As soon as those words leave your mouth your orgasm spills over him, some of it dripping onto the skirt, making him curse. You can't stop, still meeting his thrusts halfway, despite your trembling body after reaching your high.
"Mierda" he groans against your mouth,
You feel yourself collapsing on top of him, the weight of the jet lag catching up.
"Getting tired, baby?" he coos. "Shit, and I thought I was old"
"You are" you reply back; you can never not have the last word. And he lets you, because, God, doesn't he love you? He pretends to look offended by it, but the way your eyes shine tell him you didn't mean it that way. "You and your white hairs" tracing over his moustache, a soft hand combing through his locks, "These wrinkles... don't you know how much I love them? how much I love you?"
"And you have no idea how much I love you" he squeezes his eyes shut, feeling it coming through. "God, wanna make you mine. Sólo mía" his pace slows. It's coming, and yes, you will take it all. "Wanna make you a baby, mami. Want you to take it all like the good girl you are"
When he comes, filling you with burning hot cum until you feel like you might burst, you're numb. But there's a feeling so content that pools warmth in your chest, that you can't say anything else, resting your head against his bare chest, both covered in sticky sweat.
"No sé cómo voy a explicar esto" he speaks through ragged breathes, and you can only smirk, "a squirted and cummed roman skirt".
"That isn't my problem" he scoffs, and you feel your head rise against the movement, earning a laugh out of you, "I'm not part of the movie"
"You'd sure think so, with the way you walked in here"
You roll your eyes, face hidden against his chest, "can you let that go?"
"You're right" he pulls you closer to him, hand enveloping you behind your bare back. The quiet doesn't bother you as you lie closer to his chest, his heartbeat the only thing you need to be at peace, "I think punishment time is over. Think you've learned your lesson"
"Then, how about we go out? I've heard Malta's beaches are pretty"
"Relájate, cariño. Seems you've gotten your energy back" he quips, then kisses your forehead. "We need to wait for everyone to get out"
"That embarrased you are of me?" you joke.
"No" he can already imagine his fellow cast members making fun of him, starting with Paul and Joseph when they see you and Connie who will totally notice the fun sticky stains on the costume, "but embarrased of the explanation I'll have to give"
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takes1 · 7 months ago
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final part asahi x feral reader w/ a size k!nk
skip the intro if you want again, (i marked the beginning of actual smut for ease of navigating) couldn't resist adding some kuroo stuff bc i love writing him even if its not sexual/thirst. this has turned a bit more into porn with plot forgive me i'm simple
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warnings. heavy nsfw. minors DNI
info. nsfw / soft+rough kissy missionary sex / mentions of personal restraint / multiple orgasms / mentions of masturbation / gentle giant!asahi / asahi keeping your mouth shut / mutual size kink / sweet asahi / dacryphilia if you squint / sex toys (vibrator) / kuroo's sister!reader / kuroo cockblocking / kuroo being protective / 3.6k words / thanks for reading this asahi series!! it's been a delight!
haikyuu collection. more hq here! part one here. part two here. part three here.
more links. my ao3. masterlist. requests open!
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You chose some giant clothes to cover the fact that you weren't wearing anything underneath.
Then, with your security chair out of the way, you quietly slipped into the hall.
The familiar sound of Helldivers 2 on the entertainment speakers assaulted your ears. Of course, he got to invite friends over for the weekend.
You padded downstairs, the ache between your legs nearly unmanageable. You clenched your fists at the sight of his lazy ass as you walked behind the couch to get to the front door.
It was funny how quickly he zapped all desire from your body. You did not enjoy sobering up so quickly.
"I thought you said you were staying home!" Tetsurou called as soon as you grabbed the leash off of the rack.
You nearly pulled a muscle rolling your eyes so far back. You shook the thing violently from the doorway so he'd get it through his thick skull that you were literally doing what he texted you to do.
A couple voices muttered something, but your brother spoke volumes above it--
"Wait two seconds, shit-head!"
You clipped the hook into your dog's collar. To Hell with whatever he wanted. You unlocked the door and slipped on a pair of giant, black crocs.
That garbage pile gave you enough grief about your no-plans-plan in the past 12 hours to deserve being stranded on a barrel in the middle of the ocean. He could handle playing games with his friends while you went to walk the dog.
"C'mon, baby," You cooed and closed the door behind you.
It was, thankfully, nice and cold outside. You were glad you opted for some warm clothes.
"Where are my shoes?!" He yelled through the crack in the door. Almost to the end of the driveway, you didn't figure he had the gumption to follow you without them.
You pushed your hood up and pulled the strings.
A stop at the other side of the gate, and you waited for Maru to finish pissing in order to continue the walk. The big, empty street looked a little creepy in the dark.
flip!-flip!-flip!-flip!-flip!
You were glad to not be alone, but still threw your head back when he rounded the corner. His hands were shoved into his basketball shorts and he was shivering.
You both looked down to each other's feet at the same time. He had to put on your flip-flops, so his heels were hanging out the back and his grippers were on the pavement.
A silent exchange went down, one shoe at a time.
Now walking again, you returned to your baseline agitation.
"I don't need a bodyguard to walk the dog."
"Try being a little less stupid, and I'll trust you to not run off with the first guy you see."
You stopped dead in your tracks. "You think this is me sneaking out?"
He didn't respond quickly enough.
You kept walking, glad he was so cold that his teeth were chattering, "You're an idiot--."
He pushed you, unable or unwilling to argue.
"Why would I sneak out with the dog?" You muttered.
Another stop for Maru. It was silent, again, and you were wishing he would just go back by himself already.
"What's that smell?" He sounded ridiculously close to your head.
You looked up and realized that was because he was sniffing your hood. A sudden insecurity of smelling like sex flashed through you.
Pushing hard on his chest, you declared, "Fuck off."
It didn't send him flying the way you wanted it to. It only pissed him off, especially because he knew that smell from somewhere. He just couldn't recall exactly how right now.
You expected him to push or slap you back, so you tensed, but no such move was made.
"One day you'll thank me," He muttered with a grumpy chuckle.
A glance didn't do you any good. It was too dark to see his face.
"For what?" You rolled your eyes again.
It was quiet for so long that you were certain he had just been joking. As if he did anything to help you out, anyway. All he did was piss you off and get in your way.
"For making sure you don't get hurt."
Frustration on the tip of your tongue, you began to retort, "I--," but fell short of the will to say anything back for a minute.
Your glancing around in the dark didn't help you form any thoughts.
Maybe Asahi being so kind was just luck. Not the wise intuition you claimed to be guided by. There were already many times tonight that could've made a turn for the worse, and you hadn't realized until after the fact.
That didn't change how you felt, though, other than some newfound patience for Tetsurou's difficult, demanding nature.
Maru didn't want to go much further than the fifth lamp post, so your small party turned around before you could cross the street.
It was quiet on the way back. Just the jingle of your dog's collar and the flip-flip of these shoes you hated.
You rounded the corner and closed the gate behind you, Tetsurou opting to walk ahead since it was evident to him that there was no danger anymore.
It was just getting to be a comfortable silence when he had to speak up one last time.
"Has this tree always been sideways?"
You genuinely thought it was a joke, so you didn't spare a look when you crossed behind him to get inside. He caught you shoulder the way you hated so much and you swiped your hand to hit him, but saw what he was talking about and froze.
The both of you took a moment, dumbfounded, to stare at your lawn tree. It looked nearly snapped, like a hurricane had come through, but it hadn't rained in weeks. Nothing else was wrecked. Just the tree.
You felt guilty about it for just a second, but rationalized that it had nothing to do with you. You weren't sure what that was from.
"Maybe it was rotted from the inside?" You thought out loud.
He glanced around, suspicion at its full peak, and guided you inside swiftly by your upper back.
Tetsurou locked the door behind you and stayed stock-still, staring through the peephole for so long you didn't bother saying anything to him before heading back upstairs.
At your door, you heard him call to Kenma and Bokuto.
"Did one of you kick that tree in the yard?"
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You collapsed against the door with a soft shut and an even softer sigh.
There was no time to deconstruct everything that was discussed, because your eyes followed a sound that nearly made you jump out of your skin.
The man took up so much of your bed. He was on his back, scarred knuckles brushed slowly up and down, a casual pump to quell his impatient cock.
His hand fit much better around it than yours. In his other hand, held closer to his face, he was clicking a small device- the familiar buzz of which inspired a complete takeover of tension between your legs.
Your embarrassment was no secret, and neither was his curiosity.
"I'd love to use this," He grinned and looked you up and down, undressing you with his eyes.
It took some effort to find the lock on the door and make your shaky way over to the bed. Like last time, he met you at the side.
However, you noticed that before you left, he didn't have the same edge in his brow, or the eagerness that defined the way he pulled you into him.
When you stumbled, he caught you and tilted your head for a restless kiss. He was shoving his hands under the waistband of your pants and humming a sort of approval against your cool lips. It sent your stomach back into those fluttery waves of excitement all over again.
"You should take your clothes off," He muttered, fully immersed in his desire since he never had to sober off of it.
"Yeah- I should," You breathed against his rough, needy lips.
You were slipping back in quickly, though, when he took your lips in a chaste, passionate kiss all over again. His hands were slipping over your skin, discarding your hoodie before you could do it yourself.
His whole body was warm, it felt like he was burning through you when you stepped out of your pants and fell against his front. Like a melting ice cube.
When he picked you up this time and set you down, it was less premeditated, more animalistic. You gave a giggling smile when he parted your legs for him.
Any shyness he had before was long-gone after 10 minutes of imagining what he was going to do to you- you squirmed at his spit-slick fingers slipping over your soaking cunt.
"Still so wet for me," He muttered, pleased, into your hair, while his massive body settled over you.
That intense, near-evolutionary drive kicked in again where you believed you could take whatever he wanted to give you all night. It may have been the smell of his sweat, it may have been his grumbly voice.
"Obviously," You smirked. He grinned at your confidence.
"We can take this slow," He rolled a condom on without wasting any extra time, "I don't wanna hurt you."
The statement floored you for a moment. He didn't notice as he lined himself up with your tightness.
It echoed in your brain during the most contradictory part possible.
He sank into you- it wasn't easy, but after hours of build-up -more if you counted the self-pleasure you couldn't resist before he arrived- it was beyond rewarding to watch all of the stress and worry on his brow melt away in one smooth, slow stroke.
"Fuck- fuck, fuck," You whined, his grasp on your hip reassuring, but still a pen in which you couldn't wriggle from or adjust against, "God-!"
Your thighs twitched on either side of him, forcibly relaxed- you tried to catch your breath, but felt like your lungs were too constricted to do so.
His thumb brushed your cheek.
Patience and gentleness in the midst of it all allowed you to breathe a little easier.
Only kindness, with a hint of pity, remained in his expression as you gasped and struggled to ease up around his cock.
He looked away for a moment, his hand leaving the side of your face, and you heard a saving grace.
Asahi did you the liberty of placing it against your clit. His face lit up at the sight and sound of your newfound gratification.
"I bet that feels better, huh?" He smiled against your parted lips, stealing a few of your moans with an excited kiss.
There was a hard-to-pin inquisitiveness about his attitude surrounding your vibrator. Like he was dying to use it on you, feel you writhe around his still cock.
"Ohh my god-! Ah-Mn!" You cried against his lips.
It was met with chuckle and the slow pump of his hips sinking deeper into you.
It dulled the discomfort of his size, leaving only a feeling of fullness between your legs, a satisfied craving, and the intense waves of pleasure from your clit.
His pretty face and perfect body over you- how could you not just announce your paradise to everyone in the city?
One hand laced in yours, and you took control of your vibrator to swirl it the way you preferred while he picked up his leisurely pace.
He barely caught your high-pitched tone at the combination with an alarmed kiss.
Stalling, he warned, "You gotta be quiet," and leaned to press further kisses against your neck.
He quickly learned that you weren't going to stay that way for him, even if his balls were allegedly on the line.
The feeling of him going deeper, your thighs bouncing from his weight that shifted your entire body, and the building waves over your clit.
"Asahi," Came out in a needy moan.
"Shhh," He cooed, gripping the bottom half of your face to get your focus on him.
The beat of his thighs against the back of yours stole your attention instead- you squeezed against his palm with furrowed brows.
Another noisy cry at his size splitting through you, and he instinctively covered your mouth to shut you up.
He thrust hard into you and stayed there, earning a pitiful whimper, and leaned in close to catch your avoidant eyes.
A mutter against your heated skin, "Do I need to keep you quiet?"
His cock was stretching you beyond your limits- that steely look in his pretty brown eyes was so layered.
You clenched around him, butterflies attacking you now, of all times, at his stern tone, but genuine concern.
A gorgeous smile spread across his features when you nodded, helpless, but honest.
He felt too good- he filled you up better than you had imagined. You were stunned to feel that you were already close. There was just no possible way.
This wasn't how you wanted it to go.
It was too soon- you didn't want it to be over so quickly. But now, of course, you realized you didn't have the physical capacity to take him all night.
You tried moving the overwhelming buzz away from your needy clit, but met the resistance of his hand instead.
He pressed just enough to guide you right to an edge you couldn't pull back from. You whimpered against his palm.
You couldn't tell him you were about to cum. You couldn't move away, or speak, nor did you possess the will to push against him. All you did was claw, weak, across his back.
The look in his eyes responded to your subtle panic-pleasure without a word. A gentle fondness that he shouldn't have been capable of while he gave you his rougher strokes.
He removed his hand from your mouth just to swallow your sounds with a starved kiss, an avid grumble at the back of his throat when you took his tongue so well.
"Mm-!" You squeaked, nails digging deep red trenches into his shoulder.
It was an ultimate submission you never had the insurance to safely experience before.
You got the chance for a gasp before getting cut off -half a second before you could alert the entire house- by his huge palm again.
Asahi groaned as you tightened around him. He quickly shut himself up by flexing away the pleasure and leaning down to pant, warm breath spilling against your ear.
"Shh- I got you," His kindhearted whisper strung you along, crushing you underneath his weight, while he repeated that sweet promise, "I got you, baby."
All your worry of it being too soon dissipated as your orgasm wracked through your entire body and filled you with pure bliss. He fucked you hard and steady through it and didn't even grant you the dignity of looking away from him.
Your chest was tight at the end of it, eyes stinging, and you would've sobbed if he wasn't still keeping you quiet.
He watched your journey the whole time through your eyes, wholly captivated by your big, glossy fixation on him. When you blinked away the burn, he took no time to kiss them away.
Your body naturally relaxed, a twitchy and overstimulating process.
He slowed for you after he sucked the rest of your complicated tears up.
He was so heavy, so adamant on keeping your noise down that you couldn't tell him to stop. You weren't sure that you would try, even if he wasn't hindering your communication. The fact that you trusted him so much right now wasn't necessarily wise, but it felt right.
His growing intensity didn't hurt, but it didn't start to feel good until a raspy voice told you:
"Feels so good," He swallowed the spit gathered in his mouth and seethed, a light chuckle breezing past his lips, "You got no fuckin' clue."
That was just kind of sinful confession that gave you nervous chills even though he was already fucking you senseless.
He studied how your eyes clouded over at his words. A restrained, toothy smile nudged your jaw in a sugary kiss.
"I'm not gonna be able to get enough of you," He finally took his hand off of your lips and you were able to gasp at the impact of his words.
When he readjusted, he swept your legs up to his shoulders and dipped back down.
"A-Ah!" You barely choked out before he moved his hand back to its diligent place over your loud mouth.
He was so deep- you felt like he'd split right through you. Yet, you welcomed the possibility with the blessing of another steady-growing climax.
Yet, only one of you was so careless. He was so tender, so considerate because he could feel it, too. How fragile you really were in this position in regards to his size.
"God," He sighed at your loving stare.
"Gonna- ah, make me cum, lookin' at me like that," He groaned, a bit strained.
He finally dipped his head with closed eyes at the sweet, slick heat he just wanted to bury himself in. He couldn't get too carried away, now that it was starting to get difficult.
Your shitty stamina stroked his ego so much that he forgot he wouldn't be too far behind for a while. He got a bit ahead of himself and was paying for it with the climbing pressure in his stomach.
Your pussy was reason enough to fuck you harder, but that face was what really tested him.
His hand twitched at the compelling desire to hear you scream for him, but again, had to keep his sanity for the two of you. Next time he would make sure that brother of yours wouldn't be in the way.
He tried to keep an edge going, but found it laughably difficult to settle down.
If it wasn't your Fuck-me-harder eyes building up the needing to cum, it was your cute tits squished against your soft, scratched-up thighs, right under his chest.
It was impossible to keep himself from riding that high in the end.
As if to spite him, to completely spend all of his restraint, your watery eyes rolled back again. Your muffled whines filled his ears as you tightened once more around him, weaker this time but still more than enough to send him over the edge.
"G-od,fu-ck," He groaned, hitting just the right spot to fuck out both of your orgasms.
You felt him swell inside of you, his grip on your hand crushed yours back to the point that you couldn't claw him, his hips stuttered to a slow stop, deep inside of you.
A sense of satisfaction beyond the physical softened your face, your resistance between his fingers, and all your aching muscles. You weren't quite sure what it was, but didn't feel rushed to figure it out.
He was trembling when he released the lower half of your face, a beautiful sweaty and out of breath mess on top of you.
Once again, you gasped at the opportunity to breathe better.
He tensed up immediately and you flinched at the twitch of his cock inside of you.
"Shit- was I choking you?" He managed to stay worried right after he came.
You grinned, carefree on the backend of your own, and shook your head, "Mm-mm."
The look of unmatched relief that washed over him was supremely attractive.
He pulled himself out, slowly, and made a face at how much he came before turning to discard the tied-up thing into the trash with a solid toss.
You welcomed his cuddly shuffle up to your side by burrowing into his slippery chest, and sighed at last, "Cute butt."
That, of all things, made him uncomfortable. He cringed when you spared a glance up to his face from his chin. You rolled your eyes at his overthinking.
"You must be an athlete, or something--," You rubbed your face harder into his chest and felt his laugh resonate throughout your body.
It all felt natural. The joking, the cuddling, the winding down. You both forgot that you weren't together, let alone that you had only known each other for less than a week.
It was already warm with him next to you, but you were happy to be under the soft throw he found and pulled over.
"I can't believe you came twice," His soft laugh invited an embarrassed, but sharp look from you.
He clarified, "It's really hot, don't get me wrong--,"
"I'm not usually so easy," You half-joked.
A big, handsome guy that knew how to use his dick, went down on you, listened to you, and didn't shy away from a vibrator? It'd be a challenge to find a girl who wouldn't cum that quick.
You blushed under the cover of darkness at his gentle, comforting hold on your breast and reassuring kiss to the side of your neck.
The ache in your belly was evident when you were flipped over to be little spoon. It burned pretty bad and you couldn't exactly hide it.
"Did I hurt you--?"
"No," You muttered, clearing your throat, "No, I wouldn't say that."
He placed a big hand on your tummy, feather-light, and you looked over your shoulder to meet his perceptive gaze.
You sure as hell couldn't lie to this guy. He saw right through you.
You pouted and gripped your pillow. Of course you couldn't handle his dick the way you wanted to, the way you bragged about or even genuinely thought you could.
"You were so good," You admitted, a little sad in tone.
A warm kiss to the back of your head. He took the weight of his arm off of your sore body, sighing into your hair.
"You were, too."
He decided to drop the subject, since you both had strong opinions that seemed to clash.
You smiled.
You talked about a range of topics for the rest of the night. General information, first, then personal interests that turned into a long conversation about volleyball, then family history, then academics, then personality, goals, and attraction.
Soon it was 4 in the morning. You were eating popsicles from your freezer and discussing the adventure he had to get up to your window.
You both watched, trying your best to stay quiet, a minutes-long video one of his friends sent in the Karasuno volleyball group chat of him falling out of the tree outside.
A hand flew up to your mouth to silence your intense giggle-fit. You had no idea how you were going to keep something like this a secret from Tetsurou.
Before too long, the pain in your tummy was just an ache and the stranger in your bed turned into a lover overnight.
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taglist:
ty for all the replies and reblogs and likes!! it means so much. it's really nice seeing all the other asahi appreciators out here!!
@valiantqueengarden @rinheartshyunlix @alpha-mommy69 @yuyunhoo @insertamazingnamehere
@kreishin
@ruu-https @kasai-https
@40unung @deluluforcarlos55 @lili-harg @beyond-your-stars @noyaskneepad
@rinheartshyunlix @vintagevict0ria @am-3-thyst
<3 u are literally asahi mvp @screamin-abt-haikyuu
masterlist.
requests open!
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flwrkid14 · 3 months ago
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Jason Todd: Dad of Chaos and Protector of Twins
So here’s how it happens: Jason Todd, of all people, ends up adopting two chaotic teens—Danny Fenton and Tim Drake—who’ve both run away from their messed-up homes. How? It’s Gotham. Weird things happen.
Danny, after turning into a half-ghost and realizing his parents are never going to understand, flees to Gotham. At the same time, Tim decides to bail from the Drakes’ neglect and their obsession with using him as a trophy at galas. Somehow, the two runaways find each other in Gotham’s grimy streets and form an instant brotherly bond.
They both figure out how to survive together, avoiding Batman’s radar, until Red Hood comes across them while on patrol. Jason’s first instinct? Not to shoot, surprisingly, but to bring these kids under his wing because they remind him a little too much of himself—lost, hurt, and just trying to find a place to belong.
Next thing you know, Jason’s out there not just fighting crime but trying to figure out how to be the responsible dad to two ridiculously smart and reckless boys. One's part ghost, the other's got some serious detective skills, and both of them are trouble. Jason somehow becomes the father figure he never thought he’d be, teaching them how to survive Gotham (and keep their secrets from Batman), all while juggling fatherhood with crime-fighting.
Tim and Danny? Total partners-in-crime, literally and figuratively. They learn to use their respective skills to help Jason and protect each other. Danny’s ghost abilities? Perfect for scouting ahead or getting them out of tough spots. Tim’s strategic mind? Constantly trying to outsmart Jason (and usually failing, but points for effort).
Jason’s basically adopted these two feral geniuses, and while he’ll never admit it, he actually loves it. Sure, they drive him crazy—Tim with his overworking and Danny with his ghostly antics—but at the end of the day, they’re his family. And he’ll protect them, even from the Bat if it comes down to it. Because Jason Todd? He’ll go through hell and back to keep them safe.
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lewiscarrolatemybrain · 10 months ago
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Not only should Ace be more of a feral unhinged jungle child who’s like barely wearing a mask of civility for convenience sake, but also: it should be kind of a Bit.
Like, Ace learned the absolute bare minimum of socialization (meaning, wipe your ass and wash your hands) from Dadan and the bandits, but that was literally it until he met Sabo. Ace knew like a sparse handful of words — enough to get his point across, but it’s not like he really wanted to have conversations with the bandits anyway — but the infinite majority of his early childhood was spent alone in the jungle. Then he teams up with Sabo, who arguably has too much socializing, and while they do trade skills and teach each other some stuff, for the most part they comfortably fill their niches. Sabo can do all the talking and manipulating for both of them. Ace is more than happy to stand at his shoulder and bare his teeth like the wild animal he is.
He asks Makino for a manners lesson literally exclusively so he can thank the dude who saved Luffy’s life, and then later when Sabo is gone Ace sticks with the lessons because now he has to be the brother who’s good at talking, and then it ends up being actually pretty convenient a skill to have, so he sticks with it.
But it is all very much pretend to him. Ace is putting on a front.
And I love thinking about the Whitebeards not only realizing the full extent to which their newest littlest brother was Literally Raised By Tigers but also that Ace is humoring them. He thinks they are the ones being ridiculous and crazy for all their societal rules (and they’re pirates! They barely even have those!) and he’s just playing along for his own entertainment. He’s making fun of them.
Ace runs up and playfully bites Thatch’s face as a greeting and while Thatch is yelling at him that people don’t do that Ace is just like oh haha that’s so silly you guys are so silly for that. Anyway. And then he bites Whitebeard, who just laughs.
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unpunishablelamb · 9 months ago
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hiiii!!!!! ও Im not sure if you still post creepypasta headcannons but I really liked the headcannons you gave the creepypastas, it's really nice to realistic headcannons, if you want I was wondering if you could do headcannons for the friendship of the reader and ticci Toby 0_o
(If I made any typos or used bad grammar I'm really sorry (◞‸◟ㆀ) )
Realistic Ticci Toby headcanons (SFW+NSFW)
A/N: Okeyy so for the friendship headcanons just ignore the NSFW part! I just decided to combine your ask with multiple anon asks who requested relationship/NSFW headcanons🫶🏻
SFW
-First of all he isn’t the one to settle down. He has a bad past with people and it’s incredibly hard for him to trust so he prefers not spending a lot of time at your place, if he ever goes there at all
-He’s basically homeless and probably squatting in abandoned places outside of smaller towns so if you ever want to spend a little more time with him it’s there or in the woods
-In contrary to popular belief i don’t think he is shy. He is very wary and kind of feral so physical touch is a hard one with him
-He is touch starved to some degree but then again he’s become so callous due to everything that has happened, that he won’t initiate or reciprocate for a long time. He won’t push you away either though
-I think if you ever share a bed/mattress with him, you might be woken up with a hatchet to your throat or a hand wrapped around it. At least in the first few months of your relationship, simply because he’s not used to having anyone around so he panics when he gets startled and his fight instincts kick in.
-Despite everything, i do think he’s very thoughtful once he warms up to you. I can imagine him leaving you things like rocks or trinkets he finds which remind him of you
-He’s really possessive no doubt. Hardly anyone has treated him with the smallest amount of kindness, and now that you’re in his life he won’t settle for less ever again.
-I can definitely see him being the type that wouldn’t let you get out of the relationship/ friendship alive in case you ever want to leave him. Either you stay with him or he kills you. Of course it would be hard for him to do since he “loves” you but the thought of you being with someone else, leaving him to rot, is much harder
NSFW
-I don’t think he’s had experiences before you which doesn’t make him shy but even more greedy
-I think it would take him a long time to trust you enough with something like that. He isn’t reckless or sleeps around but he wants to know that you won’t backstab him (literally)
-He knows how sex works, he’s not stupid and he’s watched campers in the woods do it, thinking they were being sneaky. Of course he couldn’t help imagining it was him and you
-Now that you conditioned him to get used to a certain degree of affection and physical touch he expects more, of course he does and you love him after all right?
-Let’s hope you’re ready to sleep with him when he wants you because i do think he’d pressure you into it
-I don’t think it’d be him getting physically violent but he’d try to make you feel bad for him, try to blackmail you, manipulate you etc.
-If that doesn’t work maybe he would wait until you’re asleep, start sliding his hand under your shirt and do his thing
-I think he’s decent in bed, clumsy at first and he’s so pent up that his pleasure is all he can think about at first.
-If you do criticise him make sure to be gentle about it, he’s insecure and he will get mad easily thinking you don’t want him but he does like you please you after all and he enjoys having you show him what you like
-Hickeys. Everywhere. Good luck trying to hide them because it will look ridiculous but he can’t help it. He has to make sure others know you’re not available
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sleepymick · 4 months ago
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don’t get me wrong, i adore the hell out of the chaotic/feral side of hannigram so much -especially in regards to their sexual chemistry- but there’s something about how tender they are with each other. i can actually put into words -sort of- how their sexual chemistry plays out, but their love is literally transcendent. i love making all these jabs at them and their relationship because it’s just SO very queer, and they’re just SO ridiculous -and the show itself is genuinely just funny sometimes- but i haven’t seen a love like this on screen before. it pulls me back in every time.
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pinkponyglitter · 3 months ago
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Dating Emily Prentiss Headcanons ᝰ.ᐟ
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notes; this is silly, but i was reeeally bored and didn’t feel good enough to write anything else. also tumblr is acting up, and it pisses me off. btw, i did it for fun, so please don’t be pressed about it.
some of those are nsfw. you are responsible for your own media consumption. minors do not interact !!
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⊹ ࣪ ˖ she loooves to use pet names, especially the ones like; my love, gorgeous, angel, sweet/pretty girl. she doesn’t really like to be called anything other than emily or em. pet names are a must, but not when it comes to her. they’re reserved for you.
⊹ ࣪ ˖ she absolutely adores you. she is your biggest supporter in literally everything, and she is showing you off every chance she gets.
⊹ ࣪ ˖ she doesn’t like to talk about her emotions, and she’s also not really good at it. she’s trying really hard for you, and she’s doing much better than before. she still has some days, when she just stuck in her head — but if there’s someone who can help her, it’s you.
⊹ ࣪ ˖ physical touch is her love language. she absolutely devours intimacy. showering together, you sleeping on top of her chest. small stolen kisses when you’re at the office, sliding her hands into your jean’s pockets. brief touches. anything that keeps her close to you.
⊹ ࣪ ˖ gifts, good restaurants and date nights. she always make sure to have at least two date nights in a month. she has money and she loves to spoil you.
⊹ ࣪ ˖ you always ask her if she has games on her phone, and that makes her absolutely feral — you know she doesn’t, but her reaction is always so funny and ridiculously exaggerated that you can’t stop yourself.
⊹ ࣪ ˖ “are you sure?” she always asks. even if she knows that your answer is “yes”. she needs to hear it every single time.
⊹ ࣪ ˖ cooking together — she’s obsessed with it, even if she’s not the best at cooking it’s fun to experiment with you. she often ends up calling rossi for help, and you always laugh at her trying to explain what went wrong.
⊹ ࣪ ˖ sometimes you just read together. you take one of your books, she takes of of hers and snuggling up with each other you have quiet time. you often break the silence to comment on something, and she’s more than happy to discuss it with you.
⊹ ࣪ ˖ salsa classes! you didn’t want to, but she dragged you there, and at first you were super grumpy about that. everything changed when you saw her actually invested — you decided that you can make a foul of yourself from time to time, to see her smile. it’s worth it.
⊹ ࣪ ˖ she’s absolutely the worst at texting people back. you always remind her to keep you updated, especially when she’s away. she forgets a lot, or just sends you thumb emoji in response.
⊹ ࣪ ˖ showing weakness is the end of the world for her. she doesn’t understand why someone like you, would put up with someone as broken as her. so when she needs help, she hesitate to ask. after a while you start to catch up pretty quickly — she doesn’t need to ask anymore, you just know. it’s much easier for her to just receive.
⊹ ࣪ ˖ she’s insecure about her scars. when you started dating, she delayed sleeping with you for as long as she could. sometimes you catch her touching her scars, just tracing on top of them with her finger. you always remind her that it doesn’t define her.
⊹ ࣪ ˖ she was the one to say ‘i love you’ first. it caught you off guard, as she said that while you were crying — you were having a bad day, and she didn’t hesitate to fix it. she was whispering small affirmations into your ear, holding you close and the words just slipped out of her mouth.
⊹ ࣪ ˖ she always compliments the smallest things. things that people don’t usually notice, or they just don’t care enough to compliment them. sometimes it’s the lipstick you use, sometimes it’s your hair, new perfume, new jewelry. something. anything. it’s like she can’t stop herself, so she finds the smallest things.
nsfw;
⊹ ࣪ ˖ slow mornings on days off equals morning sex. slow, tender, sweet — something different than you both are into normally, but both of you absolutely love it. in most cases you end in the shower afterwards, and that usually ends with another round.
⊹ ࣪ ˖ she’s a dom. she doesn’t give up the power easily, so when she does you always make sure to give her everything you have in you.
⊹ ࣪ ˖ she is absolutely obsessed with you calling her mommy. at first it kind of started as a joke, but then you decided to use the mommy card when you were really desperate, and surprisingly it worked — you never went back.
⊹ ࣪ ˖ hickeys are a routine, you almost always have at least one somewhere on your body. although, it’s never in a place that people can see, she does it for you and herself. only.
⊹ ࣪ ˖ office sex happens more often than you intend. you both know that you probably shouldn’t. hell, you shouldn’t. period. somehow you end up fucking in her office a lot. she loves to throw you on her desk, and fuck the attitude you give her at work out of you.
⊹ ࣪ ˖ you wearing her clothes is a huge turn on for her. if she could, she would climb the walls every single time you wore something of hers.
⊹ ࣪ ˖ getting you off is more than enough. she enjoys your body, the small gasps and moans. every sound you make is music to her ears. they way you shiver and squirm under her touch. it’s the best reward.
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shy-writer-999 · 1 month ago
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Hihi it’s ur girl! Could I please request a Crocodile x AFAB reader fic where he uses his devil fruit to control the moisture in the reader’s body (aka he makes her wet without even looking at or talking to or being near her). Tysm queen 💜✨🥺
my fair lady!! i’m so happy to write this for u <3 sorry it took so long, i know you sent this request ages ago. what i wrote is short and turns REALLY filthy at the end... hopefully that's okay! ~850 words and not edited much.
cw: afab reader w/gender neutral language. arousal, masturbation, penetrative sex, croc is mean/kind of a dom. minors do not interact -- nsfw content!
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When you started seeing Crocodile in an intimate capacity, you noticed... changes. First, he was on your mind 24/7—the sex was just too good, he was too stern and suave, knew what he was doing and knew how to play with your body like you’d never experienced before.
And second, when he wasn’t around, you felt more feral than ever before, uncharacteristically rabid, so much so that you inexplicably got soaking wet and would have to squeeze your thighs together just thinking about him (multiple times a day).
The sudden and intense bouts of random horniness weren’t troubling, per say, but more so intriguing. You’d be minding your business and then out of nowhere you’d start feeling heat bloom between your thighs, sparks of arousal tingling as you quickly turned your panties and upper thighs into a saturated, sticky mess.
It took you far too long to put the pieces together and realize that Crocodile was responsible.
He got a sense of satisfaction out of controlling the moisture in your body with his devil fruit powers, and he had it down to a science. It was easy to make you wet and he happened to know that when he made you aroused, your body followed suit. He could tell that when he made you wet it felt good. Your body was giving into the sensation of wetness and, in turn, stimulating your brain, making you immediately and instinctively aroused. A positive feedback loop of sorts.
What amused him the most (and coincidentally got him the hardest) was using his powers to make you wet in public, when he was far, far away. But if he was up close, he'd study your face, the flush that dusted your cheeks, your shallow breaths, and distracted eyes. When you got to a certain point, he knew you would come to him.
Sometimes Crocodile teased you—he could tell that you needed him, could sense how much of a mess you were making out of yourself (and that he was making out of you), and he’d deliberately take away some of the moisture, effectively drawing out the time it would take before you lost self-control and came to him, begging him to do something about it.
Even more amusing to him was turning you away when he knew you were desperate for him. He’d shake his head, scoff (if he felt like it), roll his eyes or shoo you away to the bathroom. Imagining you taking care of yourself got him off beyond reason.
But when he decided to humor you, when he felt like indulging, he would do whatever he wanted. He’d throw you across his lap and make you beg for more, or make you straddle him on a chair and move you however he liked.
All the while, he made you ridiculously wet, so wet that you’d literally gush down your legs. Your juices were dragged down in rivulets by the cruel force of gravity, producing simultaneously embarrassing and pitiful puddles at your feet. He was entranced by those puddles. He even thought of bending down to lick them up or telling you to do the same.
Crocodile was just so mean about all of it. He had absolutely no reason to be this mean, this teasing, this scornful, but he just loved seeing you pout and beg, seeing your level of desperation rise until you decided you couldn’t take it anymore. He loved pushing you to the edge.
On occasion, Crocodile would make you take care of yourself in front of him. You’d blush crimson and be shy at first, never getting used to him just sitting there, astute, proud, and glowering. But he’d make you wetter and you’d give in, mouth hanging open in focus and brows bent at the middle.
He stayed still and watched with a sneer sometimes, not even shy about the fact that his erection grew by the second.
Another one of his favorite things about using his devil fruit powers on you was the sounds. The squelching noises sounded like music to him.
Crocodile could only hold out for so long before he had his way with you. And you weren’t going to turn him down. The thing about him was that he’d have his way with you for hours if he felt like it. He was almost incapable of doing quickies. Once he was inside of you he as determined to be there as long as he possibly could. Obviously, you had no problem with that and it was no trouble because even if he wasn’t using his devil fruit powers, he made you wet beyond what you thought was possible.
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I didn't initially set out with the idea that this would be as filthy as it turned out, but what can I say!! The heart wants what it wants. I hope you liked it, queen! 🩷🩷
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gravehags · 6 months ago
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the one who comes (richly endowed)
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Pairing: Cardinal Copia x f!Reader (Curator!Reader)
Rating: EXPLICIT, MDNI
Tags: rough sex, cum eating, copia in that goddamn white suit, oral (m receiving, through pants), semi public sex, ghoul voyeurism, masturbation, curator reader being evil
Words: 3,459
Summary: A series of sartorial events.
a/n: i am quite literally always saying how i'm going to suck copia off through those white lululemon leggings so you know. here you go.
~~~
“The eh, Ministry tailor wants to go over some of the tour outfits tomorrow afternoon. Care to join me?”
You yawn wide enough to pop your jaw and snuggle into the side of your lover, fingers raking through his abundant chest hair. He’s got a book propped up on his belly and his reading glasses perched on his long nose as he pauses every few moments to notate something in the margins or underline. 
“Yes please,” you say, leaning forward to place a kiss to each of the entwined 6s tattooed on his freckled pectoral. The action makes him chuckle, eyes briefly leaving the page to flick to you.
“You promise not to get too jealous?” he asks innocently, turning the page, “I mean these are the outfits my adoring fans will be seeing me perform in while you’re stuck here at the abbey. Who knows what kind of mischief I could get up to?”
You snort and sharply pinch his nipple, causing him to let out a ridiculously rat-like squeak.
“You’re not the only one who could get up to mischief,” you coo, “When the Cardinal’s away, the curator will play, hmm? I bet Terzo isn’t busy these days…”
Copia lets out a growl and removes his glasses, tossing them carelessly on the nightstand along with his book.
“What did you say?”
You’re trying so hard to bite back the evil grin that threatens to spread across your face as you lean away from your lover to flop onto your back and stare at the bed canopy above you.
“I think it’s only fair that I be allowed to seek out some ah…diversion in your absence. Particularly when you’re going to have your ‘adoring fans’ crawling all over you. Tell me, which of the Papas is best at eating pus–”
You don’t get to finish the sentence because Copia has rolled on top of you and situated himself between your legs.
“Dolcezza,” he leans in to growl in your ear, making a delightful shiver run up your spine, “Do not toy with me. Do not make me keep you tied to my tour bus bed with your face in the pillow and your ass in the air to use as I please every night, eh?”
You giggle warmly.
“I don’t know, sounds kind of ideal to me,” you purr, “To be so deliciously, divinely stuffed with your cum over and over after every show. What is it the siblings call me? ‘The Cardinal’s mistress’? And what is it the ghouls call me? Ah yes, ‘the Cardinal’s mate.’ Would you mate with me in that tour bus, amore? Loud and feral, for all your ghouls to hear? I think they’d like to wat–ah!”
Flinging back the covers and sitting on his haunches, he grabs you and roughly flips you over. 
“Piccola provocazione mia,” he sighs, rucking your nightgown over your hips and bending your knees, “If you wanted my cock so badly tonight–” he says, and you hear him yank down his sleep pants behind you, “--all you had to do was ask.”
You giggle into the pillow as he drags the head of his cock through your slick folds.
“Much more fun this–ah!--way! Fuck, Copia!”
He’s bottomed out inside you before you can even finish your sentence and places a firm hand between your shoulder blades as he begins to roughly fuck you. You turn your head to the side to get some air and so he can hear every noise that comes out of your mouth.
“You–ah–want it like this? Bent over and spread open for anyone to watch? To listen? Tesoro, we should recruit you for–hngh–sex rituals. Who knew a sweet girl like you liked–ah–an audience?”
The snap of his hips against yours is ruthless and the sound of his balls slapping against you with each thrust drives another moan from your mouth.
“Fuck, Copia, right there! Feel so good baby, l-love it when you u-use me, ah!”
His hand on your back presses you further into the mattress, causing you to arch your back even more sharply. The new angle has starbursts exploding across your vision.
“Sei mio,” he grunts, his grip on your hip bruising, “And until the m-moment I leave for t-tour I’ll–ah–gladly remind you, s-si?”
“Yours, yours, yours,” you chant, pushing back onto his cock to meet his thrusts, “Mmm fuck, Copia, make me yours!”
His fingers abandon your hip to reach around and slide through your folds, moaning at how wet you are. When he brushes against your clit, you let out a sharp whine.
“Copia, please! Don’t stop, don’t stop, oh fuck!”
Your cunt spasms around him and you cry out as he brings you over the edge, his name on your lips. 
“Ragazza brava mia,” he moans, “My perfect girl, so good for me. Cazzo, I’m gonna cum, amore. Fuck, fuck, fuck.”
When he pulls out of you, you whine at the loss but crane your head as far back as you can to watch him feverishly stroke his cock.
“Come on baby,” you pant even though your neck is killing you. “Cum on me. Mark me up.”
The sight of his fist rocketing along his reddened cock, slick with your juices has you grinding into the mattress, desperate for another release. When he cums with a shout, covering your lower back in spurts of his seed your body sags into the bed. You can hear his rapid breaths as he wrings out every last drop onto you and finally lets go to survey his handiwork. He drags his forefinger through the mess and you turn your head, opening your mouth obediently. When the warm digit meets your tongue, the salt of him on your tastebuds, you close your mouth around it and suck eagerly.
“What a deviant I have made of a sweet little virgin,” he marvels and you slide off his finger to swallow with a smile.
“Think I was a deviant even when I was a virgin,” you murmur, “You just encouraged it. But some of the fantasies I had…”
“Oh?”
“Get me a rag to clean this up then I’ll tell you all about them, my love.”
He does as he’s told, wiping up his seed and rejoining you in bed so you can assume your earlier positions. You make a bet with yourself about how many times the two of you are going to hunger for one another that night.
As always, both of you exceed your expectations.
“What do you think about this? Amore?”
“Hmm?” you look up from the binderful of sketches you’ve been browsing while your beloved and the tailor conversed in rapid Italian, “Think about what?”
Copia stands on a round platform surrounded by mirrors. The tailor leans up against the door and gestures to the Cardinal.
“It’s a good suit, no?”
You smile. Of course it’s a good suit. It’s the suit Copia was wearing the night of your first date. The night where the two of you grinded on each other and made an absolute mess of those trousers. Those lovely, snug trousers and the curve of–
“Amore?” Copia asks, and you see his mustache twitch in amusement.
“It’s great! I love it, did you um…change the material of the pants? From the original suit I mean.”
“Si, si,” the tailor nods, “the Cardinal requires pants with more stretch to allow for vigorous movement on stage.”
Mmm vigorous movement.
“So he’ll be wearing either of his cassocks and uh…this black suit?”
Once again the tailor nods.
“I also have made prototypes in two other colors. Would you like to see those?”
He’s asking Copia too but you interject to answer for him.
“Yes, please.”
“They’re in garment bags in the dressing room, Cardinal.”
The Cardinal gives the tailor a tight smile before turning to you and giving you a look. You smile and shrug. Better him than you, and the way he fucked you last night, you almost collapsed on the floor this morning when you got out of bed while he chuckled, the bastard. He deserves a little torture. A few more minutes pass and he comes out and does a little pose. He looks resplendent in a cardinal red version of the suit and you know you’re grinning like an idiot when he steps onto the platform, preening.
“Oh the red is good, signore,” you tell the tailor, who smiles pleasantly at you. “I think I like it even better than the black. What do you think, my love?”
Copia’s preoccupied with making stupid little muscle man poses in the mirror and you have to stuff your fist in your mouth to muffle your guffaw.
“Huh-wha…what was that, amore?”
“I said, how do you feel about the red?”
“Oh eh, si. Very nice. Vibrant. Is that all?”
“There is one more suit in the dressing room, Cardinale,” the tailor gently reminds him and Copia turns to give you a deep bow before retreating to his cubicle. You hear him disrobe and hang up the red suit followed by unzipping the last garment bag. There’s a shuffle of fabric and Copia makes an odd sound.
“I…I, eh don’t think I’ll come out for this one.”
You look to the tailor nonplussed, who looks to you, equally perplexed.
“Isn’t it just the same suit in a different color, hon?”
“Si, it’s just that it’s eh…” he makes one of his noises, “It’s…ah fuck it.”
When he opens the door and peeks his head out you smile encouragingly. That smile slowly drops as he slides out of the dressing room to stand on the platform, replaced with something more awestruck and hungry. True to the tailor’s word, it is the same suit, however this one is in snow white. He looks incredibly elegant but that’s not what occupies your mind - what occupies your mind is the hefty and defined curve of his cock and balls in those sinfully tight white pants.
“Well, what do you think?”
You let out a lewd gurgle and now it’s the tailor’s turn to muffle his laughter.
“Exactly. I don’t think I’ll be going with this one, signore.”
The string of filth going through your mind is interrupted by his words.
“What?! No!” you splutter, flapping your hands. “No, this one absolutely stays.” 
“Amore,” Copia stage whispers, “You can see my whole dick.”
“Yeah, and balls,” you loudly whisper back, “Which is exactly why you’re keeping it.”
“Sarto, will you eh, excuse me and the signorina for a moment per favore?”
The tailor silently nods with an amused expression and steps out of the room, snapping the door shut behind him.
“Dolcezza, I am supposed to be on stage in this outfit. I’m supposed to sing while wearing this. You want me to look like a…a Chippendale at these rituals?”
You cough to hide your laughter.
“Beloved, may I be frank with you?”
“Please.”
“People come to these rituals to be tempted, right? To dip their toe into what the Ministry has to offer? Copia I am being so honest with you right now when I say that this–” you gesture to what’s on display at the juncture of his thighs, “--in combination with the music? Baby, you’ll be beating new recruits off with a stick. Might as well have a sign-up booth outside the venue. If I were some wide-eyed, easily influenced young person and I walked into one of your rituals to hear you sing about being the one who comes richly endowed and coming into the daughters of men and whatnot? My love, I would swear myself to Satan for one corn chip if you asked.”
Copia nods slowly, considering.
“You…have a point, dolcezza. Kind of makes me wish I hadn’t met you until I became head of the Ghost project so I could see you front row at a ritual…oh the things I would do to you.”
“And you still can,” you murmur, setting the sketch binder aside, “Keep this outfit and I promise you I’ll visit you backstage at one of your shows. I’ll surprise you.”
“Done,” he says, slapping his thigh. A soft knock sounds through the room and the tailor opens the door.
“Everything good?” he asks, eyes flicking between the two of you.
“Molto bene, signore,” you say, “He’s keeping the outfit.”
“Ah, good, good,” the tailor smiles, clapping his hands together, “I was hoping you’d say that because I have a couple accessories for this one.”
You look to Copia, intrigued. The tailor produces a hat box and removes the lid, handing Copia a very dashing black fedora with a white band. The Cardinal places it on his head, looking devastatingly handsome as he poses in the many mirrors. The tailor disappears for a moment and then reappears to hand Copia a black cane with a silver snake handle.
“What do you think, signorina?” the tailor asks, hands behind his back. Copia turns to you and with an evil grin, slides the length of the cane along his cock then rocks his hips against it. Your jaw loosens and your eyes glaze over.
“Amore, the tailor asked you a question?”
“Hard. I mean good! Good! It’s all very good, thank you for indulging me, signore. Beautiful work but I expected nothing less from the man that makes his cassocks. You know, the way the fascia cinches him in and the fabric falls over his as–assets. Uh…”
The tailor coughs, hiding a smile with his fist.
“Grazie, signorina. And grazie, Cardinale. I’ll work on making duplicates of these designs at once.”
Copia nods and steps off the platform to return to the dressing room. A beat passes when you get up and scuttle over to the tailor.
“Is there any way you can make the pants um. Tighter?”
“I heard that.”
His veins are on fire, thrumming as he makes his walk off the stage post-encore. The crowd loves him. They love him. The little rat bastard Cardinal makes the beautiful young creatures of the crowd scream and profess their adoration. He’s feeling elated, high as he passes by two roadies and works his way backstage when he hears a low whistle come from a corner near some tour crates. When he looks he double takes because surely he must be dreaming. Surely his eyes must be playing tricks on him as he sees his amore slowly emerge from behind a box wearing that little half-smile you sport when getting up to mischief. Before he even realizes he’s doing it he’s running over to you - damn his sore muscles in need of a long shower - and into your open arms.
“Surprised?” you ask as you throw your arms around his neck. 
Immediately he buries his nose into your loose hair and a shudder rips through him as he’s enveloped in your scent. His hands roam your back, sliding down further to cup your ass and pull you into him.
“Mmm insatiable as always,” you mutter into his shoulder, pulling away just enough to look him in the eyes. The adrenaline of the evening matched with the way you’re gazing at him makes his cock stir. Your lips twitch upwards and eyebrow arches.
“Amore,” he growls, grinding against your belly, “Come to my dressing room so we can–”
“What’s wrong with right here?” you ask innocently, gesturing to the empty nook stacked with gear boxes. “I came such a long way for you, I simply can’t waste another moment.”
When you begin to lower yourself to your knees, his head tips back in a groan. Cazzo, he missed this. When he reopens his eyes he spots something in the darkness further behind you - a slender form in black and a flash of a silver mask.
Dewdrop.
He should tell you, should grab you by the shoulders and scurry away with you somewhere more private but he thinks about that day months ago when you said you wanted to be watched. Copia’s head jerks in a nod in the ghoul’s direction and he sees his mouth fall open in a pant. You’re massaging the meat of his thighs in your perfect little hands when he looks down at you.
“You’re distracted,” you murmur, blinking up at him, “Guess you haven’t missed me much after all.”
“Dolcezza, no!” Copia breathes, gloved hand stroking your hair, “Come up here and I’ll show you exactly how much I missed you.”
“No, no,” you say airily, and for a horrible moment he thinks he’s seriously hurt your feelings but then you look up and give him a sinister little grin that makes him throb.
“Did they like it?” you ask, trailing your fingertips over his clothed cock.
“L-Like it?”
“The white suit,” you say patiently, dragging your fingernails down his thigh. “How did they look up at you tonight, my love? Were they hungry for you?” 
You lean in to place a chaste kiss to his bulge that almost makes his knees give out.
“Will they go home tonight and fuck themselves to the thought of you?”
When you drag the flat of your tongue across his balls and up his cock he whimpers pathetically.
“I-I don’t know.”
“Hmmm,” you ponder, thumb rubbing the head of him through his pants. There’s a sizable wet stain on them now from where he’s been leaking pre, “I was out there, you know. Watching. Saw the way you thrusted and fell to your knees and grinded on that cane. Saw the way they all panted for you. And you know what I was thinking the whole time, my love?”
He’s breathing heavy through his nose.
“No, a-amore.”
“I was thinking about how much I wanted to do this.”
You lean in and wetly latch onto his balls through the thin fabric and his hand flies to the back of your head. You’re giggling around him and the vibrations make him whimper.
“Fuck, amata mia, yes,” he groans, rocking his hips into your touch. Slowly you drag your tongue along his shaft and even through the material he knows you’re tracing the thick vein. When Copia tilts his head back in a moan, his half-lidded eyes fall on the ghoul in the shadows. Dew is still mostly obscured but even the darkness can’t hide the way his strong hand is sliding along the ridges of his hardened cock. His head is tilted downwards towards you - drinking in the way you look with your thighs splayed in that pretty sundress, your mouth suckling on the head of his Cardinal’s cock. Copia knows he won’t last much longer - not with how worked up he already was from the ritual and with their audience - and he looks down at you adoringly.
“Close, tesoro. Gonna–ah–gonna make me cum in my pants?”
Your lips pull off him for only a moment to give him a wide smile.
“Just like New Year’s Eve. Remember?” You place a hand on his bulge and begin stroking it. “The champagne burning in our veins? The way the curve of your cock felt nudging my clit through those red lace panties you like? How your fingers gripped me hard enough to bruise?”
“Si, si, I remember, I remember, amore,”
“You told me to make a mess of myself. I should have put those panties in your pocket but we already know how you like to steal them yourself, hmm?”
Copia makes a noise somewhere between a gasp and a whine as his cheeks are flooded with red and his hips buck into your touch.
“Dirty old man,” you say with a grin, “Can’t help yourself can you, Cardinal? On stage, in my bed, right now under my hand and mouth–”
He feels the pressure building in his spine as you rub him frantically through his pants.
“--while your ghoul watches us.”
The moan that comes out of him is loud and long, hips rutting against your hand as he cums in ropes and soaks the white fabric. You’re cooing praise at him from your spot on the floor as he takes shuddering breaths. When he looks up, Dewdrop is gone but there’s no mistaking what’s spattered on the floor where he stood. Did you plan this? How could he have known? How could you have known? How–
“Hey,” you say, placing a little kiss to the wet stain on his crotch, “Help me up?”
With a start he bends over and lifts you gently by the elbows until you’re standing and stretching. Overcome with adoration, he grabs you by the back of the head and slots his lips against yours. His ragazza bella. His mistress. His perfect mate.
“So,” you say once you finally manage to pull away from him, “Show me that dressing room?”
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rootspiral · 8 days ago
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Agatha All Along deep dive: episode 8 part 7
(Wandavision entries: [1][2][3])
(AAA entries: ep1 [1][2][3][4] ep2 [1][2][3][4] ep3 [1][2][3] ep4 [1][2][3][4][5][6][7][+1] ep5 [1][2][3][4][5] ep6 [1][2][3] ep7 [1][2][3][4][5][6] ep8 [1][2][3][4][5][6][7][8][9] ep9 [1][2])
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more Oz references! fury of the elements, one very pissed ex, same thing.
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god but how much I love rio going feral?! it's so stupid I'm giggling and kicking my feet about it. you'd think a very old, very wise being would react like a grown ass adult after a breakup, especially because it was such a long time coming. but does rio go home to process things quietly? noooooooo she summons a whole storm and sits on a roof waiting for agatha to come out of her basement, so she can be an ass about it. if they were humans rio would be slashing agatha's tires and smashing windows and throwing rotten eggs at her house drunk at three in the morning, and you know what? good for her!!! she's been fucking trying to work out things in a mature responsible way, and it was never going to work, agatha was never going to grow up. so fuck it. agatha wants to be immature? we'll show her immature! I support my girl going full petty and unhinged, let her cry and scream and eat a whole ice cream tub and then throw it all up, let her piss all over agathas' rhododendrons, my girl has earned it.
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AND she's brought her favorite soul-reaping orchid with her! she's like, I'm gonna do it! this time I'm gonna getcha! I will drag your ungrateful ass to our son kicking and screaming if I have to!!!!
...girl. we both know you ain't. like agatha is literally about to die and you still won't reap that soul without her consent. absolute loser behavior.
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and agatha... well, agatha never backed off from an immaturity showdown. oooh she's gonna out-toddler you for sure.
but it's so interesting that the Road didn't give her her powers back. tbh I don't think she ever lost her powers at all, seeing as she's first and foremost a succubus and that power works just fine, if alice's fate is any indication. it's more like, three years under the spell completely drained her battery and she desperately needs to feed.
and agatha wasn't planning on joining the Road at all, as far as she was concerned it didn't even exist. like with lilia, jen and alice the Road gave her not what she asked, but what she needed all along: her prize was that moment of closure with nicky
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so rio cannot kill people, she can only make them wish they were dead, and I just realized, her special talent is also being fucking annoying, just like agatha
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by the way, rewatching wandavision I realized that his name is JOHN, not herb! I'm so sorry I've been calling you the wrong name this whole time, my guy. ALSO MOVE OUT OF THAT NEIGHBORHOOD DEAR LORD
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same goes for you two. harold you have a daughter!
(omg a literal harold, they're lesbians.)
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agatha sees the fire moon and it reminds her of alice. she draws a circle for the expelle hoc malum protection spell she's learned from her. she had a coven only for a day and look how much they've gotten under her skin.
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rio gives an incredulous sigh. are you calling me "evil"? it's like, we've been over this!
I know that baby and I love you, but also you're very much sitting on a rooftop cackling like a maniac. how can these two be both so tragic and so so fucking ridiculous at the same time.
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it's like, she's absolutely right, she's no villain and she's no demon, agatha should stop treating her like one and punishing her for it. but also... stop begging her to, for fuck's sake. rio, my love, have some dignity. stop chasing. you did a dramatic exit half an hour ago, WHY ARE YOU STILL HERE
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agatha trying to exorcise her ex wife with a spell: clownass behavior.
rio blowing the circle away with a kiss: also clownass behavior.
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but is she wrong????
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lilia's turn to come in handy!
I'm sorry but... a whole sink? she threw a whole sink at her head?? this scene is so fucking hilarious, like I know some people found rio ooc but to me it makes perfect sense. I'm just sorry she didn't throw a toilet.
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GO HOME, RIO. it's okay, we're gonna put up a picture of agatha in your living room and throw poop at it until you feel better or smth, it's gonna be okay, you let it all out.
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^^literally rio
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jen's moment: vulnus ab aqua curare.
I don't think it's going to help you much though, babe. remember when agatha kept poking wanda with a stick and got her ass kicked to oblivion in return? she's been poking DEATH for two hundred years. what did she expect???!?!
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THAT IS THE HOTTEST SOMEONE HAS EVER LOOKED, DEAR LORD
and considering that rio chooses an outfit for each soul she reaps: this is what she chose for agatha??? girl, be for real!!!
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aaaand she gets kicked into a wall a moment later. after her devastating sexy ass walk with the high slit dress and all. complete loser behavior.
(also hilarious: agatha's laundry hanging there the whole time)
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billy came back to save agatha (awww) but not before conjuring a cool wiccan costume and doing a very dramatic entrance (awwwwwwww). literally her son.
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I agree tbh
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agatha's face when she realizes billy is choosing to give her magic: this is the first time someone does it willingly. and sure he is super powerful (she drained poor alice in a second), but I keep imagining a world were agatha is an important, cherished member of a community, maybe playing the vital role of teacher and knowledge keeper, and the community willingly donates magic in return, all together and on a regular basis, like people donate blood, so that no one dies and she doesn't starve.
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look at how the beam changes color, and just how happy she is to finally eat. it's just the way she was born, you know? I hate that evanora turned it into something horrible when it didn't need to.
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oh god, that stupid outfit again. that is agatha's "I'm such a scary merciless bitch and I don't care about your feelings" outfit. as if.
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and then she realizes she's killing billy. look at her face, a moment ago she even said how good all this power feels. she could easily take it all. but of course for billy she has to stop.
so, can agatha actually control her powers? well, it's complicated, isn't it? she definitely couldn't when she was very young. possibly she never sought to learn how to as time went on.
(thank you for your patience, everyone, I'll update more regularly from now on. and you all know what happens next entry.)
go to episode 8 part 8
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can i pretty please get a rum for cowboy!spencer reid. IM IN LOVE WITH YOU😻😻
Cowboy!Spencer Reid Headcanons.
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warnings - sexual content.
my darling, I am in love with you, because this request made me feral. you're a person after my own heart. I can't be tamed. this has opened a door that cannot be locked. something about cowboys makes me want to claw at the walls
3k celebration post here. 3k masterlist here.
Cowboy!Spencer Masterlist.
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- Thinks you're the biggest gift he's ever been given. Worships the ground you walk on. Tells you he loves you a hundred times a day. Brags about you to anyone that will listen.
- Decks you out in all the gear. Buys you your own hat, your own boots, thinks you're the cutest thing he's ever seen when you wear them.
- Goes a little feral when you wear his clothes. You steal his flannels, because they're soft and worn, and he loves it. Damn near falls off his horse when he sees you.
- Takes you for rides, especially at sunrise and sunset. Loves to feel your arms wrapped around him, safe and secure from behind. He's never felt peace like riding down to the river with you holding onto him.
- Teaches you how to treat and ride a horse. He's patient, gentle, so knowledgeable. Loves watching you get the hang of it.
- Huge on physical touch. Always has a hand in your back pocket, hand kneading the back of your neck, hand stroking the exposed skin between your shirt and your shorts. He's touching you 24/7.
and now onto the sexy stuff...
- Loves watching you ride him. His cock, his thigh, his boot, his belt buckle... if you're on top of him, he's happy.
- Can't handle the sight of you wearing his hat. They say you wear the hat, you ride the cowboy... which is exactly why you regularly steal it and place it on your head. You, fully naked except his hat... Spencer needs to hold onto the dresser for a minute, because he's about to pass out.
- Gets off on marking you up. You're gorgeous, and he's not oblivious to the fact you turn heads wherever you go. But he gets to revel in the knowledge that you have a bite mark on your inner thigh, a bruise sucked into your breast, and his fingerprints on your hips.
- Loves the risk. Will take you wherever he can, whenever he can. Likes to snake a hand just under your waistband when you're out dancing, stroking your skin gently. Likes to settle a hand on your ass when you're waiting at the bar. Who cares if everyone sees you leading him out by his belt buckle? Not the two of you, that's for sure.
- Will get up ridiculously early to go and tend to the horses just so he can come back to bed and fuck you awake. You're warm and sleepy and compliant and you have that dreamy look in your eyes when he slips back under the sheets, smelling like the outdoors. You plaster yourself to him and let him do what he pleases, molding and moving you exactly where he wants.
I could literally talk about this all day you guys I can't
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as always, feel free to agree/disagree/expand on these!! send me your thoughts, lovers <3
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thebibliosphere · 1 year ago
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Tw: restricted medical diet, missing hunger cues, death, general food and chronic illness stuff. (It's a good post tho)
Being able to eat cereal again has unlocked something actually feral in me. I'm so used to not being able to grab a quick little snack that won't have Medical Consequences later that I've pretty much gotten used to just... turning my hunger cues off and running at a deficit of calories.
It takes me literal hours to eat a bag of crisps because if I don't eke it out, my body will reject it. I can't have most fruits because my body will reject them. Raw vegetables will send me to the ER. All the foods I can eat require labor, either past or present, and when you're already running on a deficit of energy from chronic pain and constant hunger, well, that's easier said than done.
But being able to do something as simple as eating cornflakes, either with or without milk, and not have my body go into an anaphylactic meltdown is... This is game-changing.
When I say it has awoken something feral in me, I'm being literal. It's hunger. I'm feeling hunger, and for the first time in literal years, I'm able to sate it without having to burn up precious energy to do it.
And it's just so achingly normal that it feels like it shouldn't be a big deal. It feels ridiculous to feel tearful over a thing like cornflakes. But when I consider the fact that in 2019, I almost died from malnutrition because my nervous system was shutting down, and I couldn't eat anything because my MCAS was so advanced everything was sending me into anaphylaxis I, I just. Yeah.
Crying over cornflakes on a Monday night.
Just MCAS 'remission' things... ✌
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cosmicourple · 1 month ago
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I am (not) sorry for showing this idea to the EPIC fandom,,
Timeloop A.U w/ Odysseus. Timeloop resets back to waking up to the Wind Bag opening every time Ody’ either dies or falls asleep after making it back home & after killing the Suitors bc hehe suffer short man 🤌🧍‍♂️.
so ye, obviously u got the usual Timeloop Angst + added trauma & all that,,,,, ye, ye, uh nu & also said Timeloop has ‘:3ly’ caused some lasting changes on Ody’ like more of his Demigod genes showing (+ added Demigod uncannyness hehehaha), scars of previous Loop wounds now appearing & staying on his body, body acclimating to have basically inhuman reflexes, strengh, all that Demigod jazz. Including: insane muscle memory.
Including the muscle memory of taking massive God Cock / Kinky Deity Stuff. Just- hear me out pls 😇
imagine, Ody’s’ currently on like, what??? The 997 Loop??? Kinda lost basically any and all previous remains of moral?, EXTREMELY FUCKING BORED- also kinda given up all hope of finding a way to break out of this living hell??? (So the usual stuff for timeloops). Now just trying to pass the now constantly resetting time??????? Has currently made it up to Thunderbringer & is feeling a bit less apathetic towards his crew plus just feels like switching things up from them dying again lol he’s very numb rn so:
decides he’s feeling for some ‘There Are Other Ways’ type activity (minus the attempted murder,,,, tho-), precedes to seduce Zeus n get whisked away to be bed, while crew is now being blown towards home, with a lot of shet 2 think about rn ggggfff but anyway & just when Zeus is smugly revealing his big ahh dick, he expects Ody’ to be wide eyed, maybe a bit horrified on “how is that suppose to fit????”, only to look down and. The mortal is just. Staring blankly (almost bored—) at his member, bc, he’s seen it before, taken it before, & at first, in those first few sexy encounter! Loops, it had been overwhelming, had felt rlly big & full inside of him,, but now???.
Ody’s’ body remembered the fullness, the stretch, the overstimulation, the ridiculous feeling of power radiating from it, matching who it belonged to hahaja- & now knew how to take it without nearly,,,,, any problem lmao.
it gets even more weird & a bit distressing 4 Zeus when he’s like “oooooookay- ehemanyways- I can still work w/ this & get the usual reactions” n starts doing the usual (to Odysseus ‘routine’) preparation n teasing. Is barely started when Ody’ silently huffs, still very bored, reaches out and grabs Zeus’s cock, lifts himself up towards the King of Gods while smoothly positioning said wiener :) to be right under his hole, & before Zeus can get a word out due to mental buffering (knew this bitch had balls but what—), he slides down onto his dick in one swift motion.
this has also happened w/ Poseidon. W/ both of them in fact, in Loops before :333333.
cue, the literal-out-of-the-Loop(s) crisis from Zeus :D🫶🫶🫶. (one of the many to be expected from everyone lolo)
,,idk I jst want feral man baffling dem Gods, & in general:
turning up the Monstertm to. 16.
(technically) cannibalising Deities :3.
looking at his whole crew dying like 😐.
trolling crew w/ Demigod uncannyness. Especially in serious situations.
using said Demigodness to fuck around, explore, be free & feral :D.
beat the shit out of Calypso.
beat the shit out of sea monsters.
doing the crouching cryptid pose, freaky yellow glowing eyes & all :3.
more murder.
other morally fucked stuff idk yet <].
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witchofthesouls · 1 year ago
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I've been seeing so many works about Optimuses gathered together across the universe, and yeah, there's the general consensus that the Optimi would side-eye Bayverse and his (violent) downward spiral, but c'mon!
Where's the side-eye towards TFP? I don't mean with the bromance between him and Megatron, I'm talking about TFP being his unintentional feral, awkward self.
Unlike his other counterparts, TFP had come from the boonies of nowhere and straight-up wilds, and then got his education from a recluse that's in so many political pies and skills from a multitude of people from a variety of backgrounds.
Like there are Things that TFP's friends, coworkers, close advisors, and teammates just... accept because it's Orion Pax/Optimus Prime.
He may have assumed responsibility over his collection of teens, but he isn't really close to them, so they don't see the shit that the others do. Even Smokescreen has moments where his thoughts are like, "Is this a Prime-thing? It must be a Prime-thing!"
Like give me the Optimus that will literally go into an in-depth discussion on the unique culture of each city-state can be stemmed by the Primes they either patroned or championed, but will straight up eat raw Energon crystal because there's a line at the convertor. 10/10 would lick a cave wall to determine its composition. (In fact, this is how Megatronus met Orion. This guy straight up took a bite of someone's art project/stupid dare because he couldn't understand egging pranksters and didn't drop from the inedibles of dark arts.) He likes long drives (makes sense, he's a convoy), free style rock-climbing off of cliffs (what), and can parkour off a ridiculous building (WHAT)
He's the equivalent of the human would eat the plastic imitation fruit and either politely say it's not his thing or finish it off if it was scented. The buff nerd that's weirdly quiet and would have the knowledge to homebrew pyrotechnics and utilize them if necessary. You would never expect this guy to be outdoorsy, he is. Very. Can tell people which wild plants or animals will cause vivid hallucinations or sleep paralysis in an offhand manner. Do not get this guy shit-faced: everything will become surreal.
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