#Like dude i was so silly in middle school | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

inchidentally · 4 months ago

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ok but the history of Oscar noticing changes to Lando’s appearance !!! the way Oscar stares and smiles and even tho it’s supposedly meant as teasing, he never follows it up with any kind of jokey insult and it ends up as pigtail pulling attention that Lando absolutely loves. the fact that Oscar doesn’t do the Staring or the Noticing with anyone else in his life except for his literal girlfriend. that there’s no way he or someone around him hasn’t noticed the hearteyes jokes made about him all over sm since like early 2023 but he has no interest in stopping - or just can’t stop himself idk which is better ???

but esp how he pets his own hair and then the two of them just breathlessly giggle and beam at each other likEEEEE I can’t get over how Not Blokey or overtly masculine they are w each other ??? like Lando will slip a bit into cabron/mate/dude behavior w friends who are more blokey like how he’ll trade play punches w Carlos and Daniel or he’ll put his chin up and pull out the crude jokes w guys he’s less comfy with - Oscar mostly just withdraws a bit and lets his voice get deeper and more monotone. they don’t do much ! but around each other they aren’t physically aggressive and treat the physical space between each other like spring break middle school crushes, they giggle, they don’t take any funny jabs at each other or and even their play-bickering is followed by breathless giggles. but esp w how things like ‘you seem uncertain’ and ‘I was uncertain of trying it’ like they’re just chatting about the why’s and how’s of Lando’s haircut the same way they’ll get wrapped up in talking about their new driver spaces (the new couch/bed, the new door, etc) or the snacks they have to try and they kinda forget to play for the audience bc they just want to comfortably toss around the minutiae between each other bc it’s nice! and calm! and reassuring! it makes them smile and giggle and be quieter than the raucous alphas mucking about out there in the paddock!

esp with Oscar’s active listening (and GOD I’ve loved seeing how much Lando has learned he loves that about Oscar after he was a bit unsure and thrown by it early in 2023)

Lando is telling a little story about himself and Oscar is paying close attention - like he always has paid close attention to details like stories Lando told on stream years ago and a moment between Lando and MaxF from a year prior and immediately knowing the year Lando got his maiden podium - and even when Lando starts talking about his curl pattern Oscar is invested and it’s silly but it’s a thing !! and they giggle and oh that’s the end of the video just them talking about Lando’s curls and giggling :3 no taglines, no wacky moments, nothing to get social media fired up about. just them quietly chatting in their half-sleepy little voices!

but like Lando’s dimples are so deep you could fall into them and he’s wriggling delightedly on his little butt and twirling his fingers in his curls and looking up at Oscar through his lashes and Oscar is leaning back all easy and relaxed and smiling big big big like he does in the mirror selfies with Lily and goddddd they’re so unusual and sweet and killing what’s left of my sanity w each tiny video under one minute

video sources: one two three four

#landoscar #inchidentallyanessay #hearteyes #lando's oscar smile #oscar's lando smile #the great mid season catch up

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3rachasdomesticbanana · 10 months ago

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Just Friends | Han Jisung

Synopsis: Unrequited love is a bitch. Especially when it's between you and your best friend. Even more so when both of you think it's one sided. So what could possibly happen between you and him during a night of partying? Nothing right? You're just friends after all.

Pairings: au Han Jisung x Female Reader

Content Warning: Underage alcohol and drug use (marijuana only), Heavy smut, Friends to lovers, Public unprotected sex and light fluff at the end.

Author's note: I do not advise any anyone under the legal age to take part in the actions that take place in this work of fiction. Both parties are consenting adults over the age of 18. Please be responsible.

Part II

Want more smut? Follow the banana 🍌

"Y/N, you made it! Sweet!” Your best guy friend Jisung bounces up to you when you walk into the party.

His cheeks are flushed and his eyes are slightly glassy. Looks like he got a head start on partying but he makes sure to help you catch up. Pushing a plastic red cup into your hand the liquid sloshes over the top a little and you're hit with a strong whiff of vodka. Shaking your head with a smile, you eye your best friend since middle school. His silly grin makes your heart flutter and wakes up the butterflies that laid dormant in your stomach. Why did I have to fall for him? You think to yourself but quickly shove the thought away. Tonight you're going to have fun. Being a good girl all the time has gotten boring. Besides it's your last year in highschool, better live it up.

“Dude, of course I came. No way in hell was I going to miss watching you make an ass out of yourself.” You say jokingly and force a large gulp of your drink down.

Fuck, it was strong but all the better to get you quickly to the level Jisung was on. He wasn't just tipsy either, a lit rolled joint rested in-between two of his long fingers. The embers softly glowed in the darkened basement of the house the party was held. Some girl you barely knew but her parents were cool. Staying upstairs and even supplying the drinks. As long as no one was driving, the way they saw it, it was better we were safely doing it here rather than out on the streets.

“Oh come on y/n when do I ever make a fool of myself?” Jisung asks, spreading his arms wide and a bit of his drink splashes onto his arm.

Covering your mouth and laughing behind your hand at your high and drunk friend, who you were madly in love with, you pointed your cup in his direction as to prove your point. “I rest my case.”

Stealing the joint from his fingers you put it up to your lips and inhale deeply. His eyes watch the way your lips cover the end of it, the way they tighten around it to inhale the smoke that heats your tongue and throat. He's transfixed, it seems, completely forgetting what you two were talking about. Instead, thoughts of your lips sucking his cock just like that flashes in his mind. His fuzzy mind wanders, imagining scenarios of you down on your knees in front of him while he's giving every drop of him.

When you lean your head back, eyes towards the purple and orange Halloween lights strung up on the ceiling and exhale the smoke, Jisung's eyes find their way to your neck. His gaze travels to your collarbone and down to the black v-neck T-shirt you wore with skeleton hands over where your breast lay nestled away underneath. Lingering eyes notice the way your chest rises and falls with each breath and how delectable your cleavage looks in that shirt. He can't help his thoughts. You've been the cause of all his wet dreams.

Of course you don't notice a thing. In your mind you think he doesn't notice your body, you think he doesn't see the way your tight jeans hug curves. Why would he? You think, taking another puff and another. I'm probably just one of the bros to him.

“Woah, woah, woah. Bro take it easy.” Jisung says chuckling and taking the joint back from you.

His words only confirm your thoughts. Yeah, we're just bros… just friends. You roll your eyes and with an already cloudy brain you chug your drink. It burns going down but the feeling is better than the feeling of unrequited love.

“I need another drink. Where'd you get this?” You wonder with eyes scanning the party.

Bodies pressed close together as they dance. Practically fucking in the middle of the room to the loud music that plays with its heavy bass. But you don't see the drinks. Looking back at your friend he's just staring at you with his lips parted. Raising an eyebrow you silently question his weird behavior only for him to smirk at you before continuing to smoke.

“Follow me lovely.” He says, using the age old nickname he gave you years ago.

Every time he calls you that you swear your panties become instantly drenched and with your head swimming in alcohol and weed, the fantasies of you and him run rampant in that cloudy heavy head of yours. He leads you between the throngs of your classmates who are equally fucked up as you are or more to the kitchen. It becomes hotter the further you move into the basement yet entering the kitchen the breeze through the open window feels great on your already heated skin. Various bottles of alcohol are lined up on the counter in the middle and next to the fridge there's different types of sodas and juice. Reaching a hand out you go straight to the watermelon vodka, smirking when your hand wraps around the glass. Jisung loves watermelon. Watermelon flavored anything really. You often wonder if you were to kiss him would he taste like watermelon? Sweet and juicy like the red flesh of the fruit.

Knocking back a couple of more drinks and even getting a fresh joint all to yourself, courtesy of Felix, a friend of yours and Jisungs, you feel… free. Both light and heavy at the same time. Every beat and every bass of whatever song that plays you swear you can feel. Really feel it in your bones. The feeling is heavenly. Leaning back on your elbows against the counter of the kitchen's island, you listen to Jisung and Hyunjin -another friend- talk about the new Call of Duty game that dropped last week.

“Did you see the tits on that hot redhead in the campaign?” Hyunjin says dramatically, covering his face with both hands and dragging them down.

You just laugh and flick some of the ash off the end of your joint into an abandoned cup of water. Watching it sink to the bottom of the cup you bring your own up to your mouth and drink deeply.

“Oh fuck yeah I saw those babies. Although those tits don't come close to y/n’s.” You hear Jisung say and you almost spit out your drink. Wide eyed and coughing up a lung you look at the two boys as they throw their heads back laughing.

“Shit, you should've seen your face. I thought you were going to pass out for a second there y/n.” Jisung laughs, patting you on your back.

“Well excuse me. I didn't expect my tits to come up in a conversation.”

He chuckles again and his hands begin to rub your back in small circles. His fingers sprawled out wide and you're hyper aware of the heat emitting from his palm as well as his body that's pressed up close to the side of you. Hyunjin isn't paying attention to either of you by now. His phone is his top priority as his fingers fly over the screen texting someone.

“I can't help it if you got nice tits lovely.” Jisung whispers in your ear causing you to shiver.

He takes your joint and holds it out for you to take a drag. Swallowing hard and wetting your lips you lean forward, eyes on him and cover the end with your lips. He watches you inhale deep and when you turn to blow the smoke out he takes a hit as well.

“Dance with me?” he asks you abruptly, taking your hand in his. Dropping the joint into Hyunjin's hand on the way out of the kitchen he guides you to the middle of the makeshift dance floor.

What the fuck? I know I'm pretty shitfaced but am I hallucinating now?

That thought repeats in your head the entire time Jisung dances with you. You're convinced that you imagined the entire conversation in your intoxicated state and start to move your body to the music. Eyes closed, hips swaying left and right, head slowly bobbing to the beat of Chase Atlantic's Slow Down. You're singing along with the sensual and suggestive lyrics when you feel a pair of hot hands on your skin just below the hem of your shirt. Eyes fly open in surprise but when you turn to look at the person who's now pulling you into them your pulse quickens. Jisung's lips are close to your own and you can smell the watermelon vodka you and him drank all night. Fingers pressing into your hips he encourages you to keep dancing, willing you to grind your ass against him.

Too faded in your mind to feel any ounce of nervousness you'd have on a normal day you go all out. Hips swirling in a circular motion you continue to dance pushing your ass against him. He moves with you matching your movements, bodies rolling together. The hardness in his black jeans is unmistakable and it only makes you want him even more than you ever have. For seven years you harbored your secret crush on him and for 3 of those years you lusted after him. Nights in your bedroom alone you'd moan into your pillow crying his name over and over imagining his fingers rubbing your velvety walls instead of your own. The very fingers that tease and caress your skin as they make their way to your belly.

Needing to see his face, because part of you still believes that you're passed out somewhere dreaming, you look back at him and the sight breaks something in you. Maybe it's the walls you kept up in order to not get hurt, maybe it's your sanity, you don't don't really know. All you know is that you need him. You need to feel the stiffness that's clothed and pressed on your ass inside of you.

Jisung's eyes land on your lips before he slowly brings them back up to look at you. Fuck it, you do what you've dreamt about doing and kiss him. It's blissful and for a moment it's sweet. His lips taste exactly like you thought. Watermelon. It's only when the hand that rests on your stomach travels south that the kiss intensifies. It becomes messy, hot and hurried. He cups your sex over your jeans and you moan on his mouth.

As if he wasn't already hard, you feel his cock stiffen more and he groans softly on your lips. The sound carries its way inside of you down to your feet. The bodies around you fade away, leaving just the two of you in a intimate, private bubble. Holding onto you tightly he pushes himself hard into as if he could penetrate you through all the layers of clothing that currently keep you two from actually fucking right there in front of half the senior class. This teasing, it's an excruciating sort of sensation.

“Fuck me Jisung.” You beg, “Fuck me hard.”

“Shit.” He growls.

He doesn't hesitate, doesn't even let go of the hold he has on your waist when he pulls you into the kitchen and out the glass door into the backyard. There's not a lot of people out here but they're just a blur to you while you get dragged into the dimly lit garage through a door on the side of the house. Only thing illuminating the space is a large bug zapper. The soft neon purple light bounces off the two cars and random objects, casting strange shadows on the walls. You're jerked forward into Jisung's arms and his lips are on yours again. His hands palm your ass while his tongue dances with yours.

“Mm baby, fuck why do your lips taste so good?”

His words, dripping with lust, fall from his mouth. You don't get a chance to come up with some witty or stupid reply because he's spinning you around and bending you over the hood of a black mustang. The hood is cool to the touch from the late October night air but your body is scorching. Fumbling, drunk fingers clumsily undo the button on your jeans, making quick work on the zipper next. Doesn't take long for his pants and yours to be a pool of denim around the pair of your ankles.

His hand comes crashing down over your ass smacking it once making you gasp in shock. He moans appreciatively, licking his lower lip watching your skin turn pink. One hand palming where the strike connected he uses his other hand to guide the leaking tip of his cock to your opening.

“Damn you're so wet.” He shuddered, rubbing himself in-between your folds.

“J- just for you, Ji.” You purr.

“Yeah baby? You get this wet for me all the time?”

You nod your head in response. Speech becomes increasingly difficult the more he teases your cunt and rubbing himself over your clit. When he rams into you suddenly the sound that leaves you is so foreign to you that you aren't even sure it came from you. This strangle whimpering cry seems to only make Jisung crazier. He's driving into with so much force that the car rocks underneath you. He's so thick and the feeling of him stretching you wide, has you feeling higher than any strain of weed you've had.

“F- fuck y/n... Why do you feel so good?” He hisses, pushing his cock deeper and deeper inside of you.

You can't speak. All you can do is moan and whimper incoherently, watching your breath fog the shiny black surface of the car. His balls slap against your clit each time his length disappears inside of you. He isn't quiet either, he doesn't shy away from moaning your name praising you or telling how good you feel on his dick. Your name is repeated like a mantra.

“Jisung, fuck!” You manage to cry out clawing at the smooth surface below you.

“That's my girl. Keep talking lovely. I wanna hear you. Wanna hear your sexy voice.” Rolling his hip he slams into at such an angle your legs begin to shake.

“Don't- don't stop, shit. I'm so close Sungie. Fuck, your cock feels so good inside of me mmm.” Your words push him closer to the edge and his fingers dig painfully into your hips.

Doesn't matter though, chasing the climax that's building quickly inside of you is what matters. Feeling Jisung's cock slide in and out of you creating this beautiful slippery sound when your bodies connect…. you don't know how you'll ever get enough of this. With a shuddering breath you squeeze your eyes shut so tight that you start seeing specks of white lights flashing behind your lids. Your skin prickles and your walls clench down around him pulling a strained groan from him as your orgasm crashes through you. Burying your face in the crook of your arm you attempt to muffle your anguish moans. Jisung pumps into you at a frenzied pace groaning and grunting and cumming with you at the same time.

“Ah, y/n, y/n! Shit, fuck, baby!

Your pussy pulsates milking his cock for every drop of cum that he gives you, filling you up to the point that some starts to drip down your inner thigh. Your legs feel like jelly and the sound of your shared heavy breathing and panting seems to somehow sync with the rhythm of the muffled music playing from inside the house. Groaning he slides out of and you shiver feeling the cold hit your ass.

“I've wanted to do that for a long time.” Jisung admits softly after your clothes are back in place.

The sudden confession makes you feel suddenly shy as if he wasn't just rearranging your guts one minute ago. With gentle hands he cups your face and places a sweet and tender kiss to your lips. When he pulls back from you his eyes blaze with unspoken words that you feel in your chest. With the high from the weed gone and the buzz slowly wearing off it becomes clear that this wasn't a one time thing. The love you thought was one sided wasn't and he wanted to be clear about that, even if he couldn't put it into words right now.

“Come back to my place? I don't want the night to end yet.” His hands find their way to yours intertwining your fingers together. “My parents aren't home.” He adds with a cocky smirk.

A giggle bubbles up from you and you roll your eyes playfully. “Can't get enough can you Ji?” You tease, finding it easy to still have the best friend vibes between you.

“Lovely, the way you felt on my dick, I don't think I'll ever get enough.” He confesses and picks you up, tossing you over his shoulder carrying out of the garage into the Halloween night air.

#han jisung imagines #han x reader #han jisung #han jisung x you #han jisung x reader #han jisung x y/n #han smut #han jisung fanfic #han jisung fanfiction #han jisung oneshot #han jisung smut #han jisung drabbles #stray kids smut #skz smut #han jisung scenarios #han jisung au

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amoeganism · 4 months ago

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HIIII I just saw your post about your event and thought I'll be silly and request smthing ^_^ ok sooo first time meeting ness ! 😯 (one shot or hc whichever you feel more comfy writing! <3) have a great dayyy (⁠＾⁠3⁠＾⁠) ♪

ACADEMICALLY SMART BUT EXTREMELY STUPID alexis ness

aka. how u meet ness aka academic rivals to lovers but ness dont gaf bc hes just trying to #play #ball

you meet him at quite a young age and share a few things in common

ill fitting school uniforms and the wandering eyes of any child

while you find yourself fascinated by the numbers written on your teacher's chalkboard, ness is folding dinosaurs and stars on pieces of scrap paper, mumbling to himself

you didn't mind him and he didn't mind you

you guys were classmates and that was that

but then middle school came around and you started acting like you had a stick up your ass 24/7 as long as ness was around

like wtf that mf almost never studies why is he at the top of your class...

suddenly you get distracted in classes because you're focused on drawing mini ness figures with fat x's covering his face and devil horns

ness sees this one day after your notebook fell to the ground and at first is like omg!!! cute drawing of me as a fantasy creature but then he was like wait what the fuck why do they have it out for me????

he barely thought about you until then but apparently you've developed a passionate hatred for him just because he scores higher grades

he still has no clue

you are FUMING

so you start studying even more if that's even possible

while you go to your schools library to bust your ass in the textbooks ness goes outside with a ball he managed to shove into his bag and starts kicking it around

ness: :D ball!!!! no school!!! ball :D

you: KILL YOURSELF KILL YOURSELF KILL YOURSELF KILL YOURSELF

after one particularly hard test that you flopped (it was like an 80% be serious) you caved in and asked ness with help studying

he looked at the material and was like man idk it just makes sense

little boy thought you were going to punt him into hell like he does with his football

him, terrified out of his mind and just wanting to go to his football club meeting, sits down and looks at the material

you show him your notes and he quickly explains it but is running late on time

he gives you his number and says hes going to text you help

you went home that day like ???? that dude lied to me he isnt sending me shit ??? before it clicked

he does not text you because he does not have your number... he gave you his number...

so you swallow your pride and shoot him a message, begging for help a second time in the same day and on his end, he laughs at you a little but offers to call

you guys work on the subject for a good couple hours and before you hang up, you offer to study together for future exams because he's admittedly a good teacher

ness is trying to find a way to say "no thanks i don't care about school good luck tho XD ROFL LOLLLLL" but then he realizes that it's going to make his parents trust him a little more

he accepts and you guys go to the library together once a week

he finds that you're actually kind of funny and cool and not just a human bomb that's plotting his death

he tries to be slick about offering to meet more often

"oh... this unit is a lot more difficult than the last one.... you wanna heh.... come back tomorrow? *gulp*"

"ok"

"WOOOO"

one day ness told you he was going to try out for bastard munchen and you somewhat knew of them because of ness going on tangents about football

you supported him on it, not realizing it would cut down your weekly meetings

suddenly there was an alexis-shaped-hole in your chest but you didn't want to admit it to him

and for alexis, there was a you-shaped-hole in his chest that he tried to fill by training with kaiser and the rest of bastard munchen

yes, the team was filled with dicks, but none of them had the same foul personality you had!!

texts dvery day checking up on each other but it was nothing like hanging out in person

calls were better but still not the same

as soon as he heard about his first off day, he called you and asked to hang out

you tried to be nonchalant about it but who were you kidding both of you guys wanted to see each other again

although the directions of life the two of you were headed towards were almost polar opposites, being reunited at a stupid library table for the first time in months was all that mattered

#blue lock x reader #blue lock #bllk x reader #bllk fluff #bllk #blue lock ness #alexis ness x reader #ness x reader #alexis ness #ness #ness blue lock

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stxrr-strxckk · 1 month ago

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Shakedown, 1979 1997!

(General South Park Headcannons)

A/N: Just some silly little headcannons of our favorite main 3 boys! These are non romantic but I can make romantic ones too if y'all want! Cartman isn't included in this except for little cameos he makes in the other hcs.

Any warnings?: Cartman being Cartman, a lot of swearing (obviously), Cartman is just really antisemitic.

What's on the record player?: 1979; The Smashing Pumpkins

Stan Marsh...

✭Stan and Kyle are super close in height. Like, down to the millimeter. You know how some people get measured against wood beams and there's little marks for each age? Stan and Kyle have one they share in Stan's house. Blue marks are Stan, Green marks are Kyle. He made Kyle keep his hat on when they measured since his hair gave him extra height.

"See? I'm taller!" Kyle grinned triumphantly.

"No way, dumbass. It's just that stupid fucking hair, right Cartman?" Stan looked over at his friends for approval.

Cartman nodded. "Yeah, it's that jewey ass hair, Kyle. It makes you seem taller and your nose seem smaller." Kenny's muffled snickers could be heard through his jacket.

"That isn't true, fatass!"

"Yeah stop making fun of his big nose Cartman, he can't help the fact he looks like his bitchass mom." Stan laughed, and Kyle shoved him.

"Hey! Not cool dude, that's my mom you're talking about!"

"Okay, okay, just push your hair down so we can prove I'm taller."

"No way man."

✭Once he gets older, Stan grows facial hair crazy fast. He has to shave every 2 days, at least. One time his razor broke and he had to wait until he got paid to get a new one. He grew the ugliest mustache known to man and Cartman started calling him Chewbacca. His mom said he looked just like a younger version of his father, and that's when he knew he had to get rid of it soon as possible. He wound up finding a waxing kit and tried to get rid of it that way. Long story short, he wound up with half a mustache and burns all over his upper lip. His mom had to let him use her razor to get rid of the rest of the hair. He refuses to touch any kind of wax now.

✭Listens to bands like Weezer and Blink 182, convinced their songs are made for him. "It's just like my life-" no it isn't. You're just a loser.

✭Not a very athletic guy. He's tried every sport under the sun(his parents made him), they're just not for him. He tried drama club too; hated the acting but liked the tech aspect. He ran spotlight for a few productions but ended up quitting because of how much the other guys made fun of him.

✭He had to play cello when he was younger, and quit the moment he started high school. He still knows a few songs and was pretty good.

✭He's insecure about his thick eyebrows and nose. He has a greek nose and thinks it's a lot larger than it is. Kyle judges him every time he starts talking about it.

"No, it sticks out so much! See?"

"You're joking, right?"

"No, it's so noticeable!"

"Dude. At least yours is straight. Mine is hooked. Hooked. You think I like this fuckin' thing in the middle of my face? Hell no!"

✭Whenever he's pissed at Kyle he ends up complaining to Kenny since he can keep secrets better than Cartman (and because people can never tell what Kenny's saying)

"And then he said 'grow up Stan, it's not too big a deal!' Like he wasn't just hung up about some girl rejecting him- At least me and Wendy actually dated! You know who wants to date him? No one! He's never even had a girlfriend. Yeah, you know that girl from Canada who he talked to online for a whole year before she ghosted him? That was a fake account me and the guys made to troll him. He never realized. And what's funnier is that-"

"Dude, you've been talking for like, ten hours. I need to get to sleep, it's a school night.

"Right. Sorry. But can I just say-"

"Out."

"Alright, I'm leaving. But Kyle's such a dick, he won't even stand up to his mom for me-."

Kenny has to push him out the door and lock it so he can't get back in. Then Stan and Kyle make up a week later and everything goes back to normal.

✭Was actually convinced he had superpowers when he was younger, around 5 or 6. He predicted it would rain once and all of a sudden he thinks he controls the weather. He told the guys and when they called his bluff he got super pissed and made everyone on the playground watch as he used his weather powers to try and make lightning strike. He ended up falling off the monkey bars and he now refuses to go anywhere near them.

Kyle Broflovski...

✭Puberty hit him like a truck. And not in a good way. All of a sudden he's 8 inches taller, growing a ratty mustache, with some of the worst acne and and a voice that cracks like no other. (Cartman makes fun of his voice until his starts cracking too. The hypocrisy is wild.) He was also the first in the group to start puberty. He thought he'd feel so mature and cool but ended up hating it.

✭Thankfully, now that he's taller he can actually play basketball without getting blocked by everyone. He's the tallest in the group, around 6'2 or so.

✭He has prescription glasses but never wears them because he thinks they make him look dorky. They do, but that's only because his mom picked out the thickest frames so they wouldn't break easily. When he's wearing glasses, he looks like Bart Simpson in the episode The Last Temptation of Homer, when he gets all nerdy and shit. Kyle even has the orthopedic shoes to boot.

✭He runs a dnd campaign for him, Stan, Kenny, Tweek, Craig, and Token. He used to invite Cartman but after his millionth tantrum they decided it was better without him. Kyle usually dms and sometimes writes a few of his own oneshots for the gang to do.

"Okay, as you trudge through the jungles of Chult, an animalistic cry pierces the air. Everyone roll an intelligence check!"

"This better not be another one of those dinosaurs," Stan groaned. "I just got mauled by one back there."

"Roll perception and you'll find out!" Kyle replied with a grin. "The tomb isn't far, guys. This should be one of your last encounters."

"Wait, we're not even at the tomb yet?!" Tweek's eyes widened. "We've been in this jungle for days!"

"I told you guys Tomb of Annihilation wasn't going to be an easy adventure." Kyle shrugged, before going back to business. "Okay; Craig and Token: while the rest of your party shrugs it off as just another monster you'd rather not deal with right now, you two recognize the call as a Hydra's- and it sounds hungry."

"A hydra? Dude, we are so fucked!" Stan yelled.

"Those things have like, 20 heads! Oh fuck!" Tweek added. A residual groan was heard around the table as the boys realized the danger they were in.

"This sucks ass, Kyle. How'd you talk us into this adventure? We shoulda done Curse of Strahd..." Token complained.

"Mm hmm!" Kenny agreed, crossing his arms.

"Come on guys, I believe in you! It doesn't even have that many hit points!"

"I hate to admit it, but we could really use Cartman's fireball right now." Craig sighed.

"Hey, we all agreed. He's never invited back. Not after the massacre..." Kyle shuddered.

"You're right. We'll just have to hope Princess Kenny can charm this thing." Stan nodded.

(Little bonus: Stan is a fighter, Token is a warlock, Craig is a ranger, Tweek is a paladin, Kenny doesn't have a main class he likes but mostly plays rogues or bards. Kyle usually plays as a sorcerer when he's not dming and when he's invited Cartman plays a wizard.)

✭Kyle doesn't seem like it but he actually is kind of strong. Yeah he's lanky and uncoordinated, but he can throw a pretty good right hook. He's done boxing for years. Started because he wanted to get Cartman to quit making fun of him. He's pretty fast too- he tried track out in middle and high school. He's good at jumping hurdles because of his long legs.

✭He has braces and the amount of food that gets stuck in them is criminal. He starts carrying around a little compact (the ones with two mirrors) just to make sure his teeth are clean after lunch and Cartman calls him gay for it.

"Wow Kyle, I didn't think you could get any gayer but here we are." Cartman said at lunch as Kyle whipped out a little compact.

"Shut up fatass, I'm just making sure I don't have food in my teeth like you always do."

"Ey! I do NOT have food in my teeth, thankyouverymuch." Cartman crossed his arms in a huff.

"Yeah, cus you're too busy eating everything that gets stuck in your mouth, fatboy." Stan said, Kenny laughing in agreement.

"I already told you, I'm just big boned! You're just jealous that my mom cooks me good food, not that jewey stuff Kyle always has."

"Fuck off Cartman, you'd probably eat that too."

"Yeah, no way dude. I like my food American, thank you very much."

"Dude. That's so racist."

"Oh, I'm sorry, is it racist to want to eat normal, all-American food?

✭Hear me out on this one: He's fluent in brainrot. Says skibidi on the regular, refers to himself as a sigma rizzler, all that shit. Since he has to babysit Ike all the time he's pretty caught up on gen alpha slang (Ike watches skibidi toilet unironically. He makes Kyle watch it with him). He started using it around Cartman who was convinced he made it all up. Him, Stan, and Kenny had a field day with it.

"Dude, that's so skibidi!"

"Kyle. What the fuck are you saying."

"You know, skibdi. Like, the thing on tiktok?"

"Don't tell me you don't speak brainrot, Cartman."

"I- I do too! I just... Didn't understand Kyle with his gay ass voice.

"My voice isn't gay, you gooner!"

"Hey! I'm not the gooner, you are, you... gooner!"

✭He barely ever gets haircuts. When he does, his mom just puts a bowl on his head and cuts it herself. It's part of the reason he started constantly wearing his hat. If you've seen that scene from pen15 where Maya gets her hair cut, it's just like that.

"Mom, you promise you won't go too short this time?"

"Of course bubby! It'll look the same as always, I promise."

"Mom- the clippers-"

"Shh, I know Kyle, just trust mommy."

"But the guard-"

"Trust mommy, Kyle."

"It's not the right one- it's too short-"

"No, it's okay! Trust me, I've done this more times than I can- oh."

"What? Is it bad?"

"Uh- bubby, just remember, you have a very handsome face, and if any of the boys say anything about your hair-"

"Oh, no. It's bad."

"No! No, it's just- it'll take some getting used to."

"Let me see. Where's the mirror?"

"Uh- maybe it's best if you just... Put your hat back on..."

✭He can't talk to girls for shit. Resorts to online chatrooms to try and flirt. Has gotten catfished 13 times. At least 3 of them were Cartman.

"No, Stan, I swear! She's real! Her name's Daisy, and she lives in Florida. She says she really wants to meet me, too! So I saved up for months and sent her 1500 for a first class plane ticket here. Check it out, she's pretty cute, right?"

"...Dude. That's Taylor Swift."

"Again?!"

Kenny McCormick...

✭He's a biter. And I don't even mean in a "ooh so freaky and kinky" way, I mean in a "he once bit Cartman so hard he peed his pants and refused to be within 5 feet of Kenny for a week."

✭When he gets older he ends up growing his hair out into a kind of mullet-wolf cut thing, he looks like Kurt Cobain.

✭He's actually pretty smart. He just doesn't think school is that important for him and doesn't wanna try too hard and get unwanted attention for being smart. Purposely gets Bs and Cs so his friends won't beg him for answers.

✭starts giving himself piercings once he's older. He's too poor to get them from a professional so he just uses old needles and snow to numb the pain. They almost always get infected.

✭Draws penises on his friends homework so they get in trouble when they turn it in.

"Yeah, and then she was all like- Dude!"

"What?"

"Again? Mr. Garrison is gonna collect this any second! You really had to draw a dick on it?"

"Heh, you gotta admit stan, it's pretty funny."

"Shut up fatboy, he drew it on your paper too."

"Wha- hey!"

✭He's a scrappy fighter. If a kid tries to fight him, he's biting, scratching, hair pulling, everything. 9 times out of 10 he wins and the other kid winds up absolutely wrecked. Once head-butted someone so hard he knocked out the kid's teeth. Now nobody fucks with him.

✭He was the only member of Moop who actually stuck with making music after the whole strike. He's the most musically inclined of the main 4. Wrote a few of his own songs but most of the lyrics were about loving boobs and pussy so record companies didn't end up signing him.

✭We all know he plays drums, but he also started learning electric guitar when he started his solo career. Can't sing for shit though (unless it's opera), so he tries using autotune. It just makes him sound worse.

✭He's the only member of the main 4 who's nice to Butters. Not just because he feels guilty he's a loser, but because he actually enjoys hanging out with him and how genuinely nice Butters is. The two are actually pretty good friends, Butters gets his mom to pack him extra food he gives to Kenny so he and Karen don't end up going hungry.

✭Was 100% the kid who taught everyone what sex was. Also brought his dad's nudie mags to school and showed all the guys.

"Gross, dude! What is that?"

"I dunno, I found it in my dad's room. All the girls inside are showing their boobs! Check it out!"

"Eww, why are they so pointy?"

"Because, Kyle, girls boobs start out pointy and then, once they turn 30, they get all saggy, like your mom's."

"Gross, dude! Don't talk about my mom's boobs."

"Yeah, don't talk about Kyle's mom's saggy boobs Cartman."

"Stan!"

"What? I'm defending you!"

"Hey guys, you wanna know how babies are made?"

✭As he gets older he starts to see through all of Eric's bullshit like the other guys, but still supports his ideas more than Stan and Kyle. He doesn't wanna just abandon him.

✭Amazing with kids. Shockingly so. He basically raises Karen on his own, so he knows how how to deal with kids better than the other guys. He tried to start a babysitting business after he realized how much money he could make, but if fell apart after Cartman joined and started to get the kids he babysitted involved in a ponzi scheme.

"Cartman, you did WHAT?"

"Nothing! I just had an idea..."

"Oh god, we're screwed."

"Cartman, WHAT DID YOU DO?!"

"I just thought, if people invested in our business we could get them to keep hiring us, and we can get them to invest by making them give us money in exchange for more money back, and instead of actually giving them our money, we'd just give them other people's money who also invested, and then we'd have infinite money!"

"Cartman you dumbass! You ruined my business! We're bankrupt now!"

"Ohhh, I'm sorry Kenny! I just wanted to get us infinite money! But I guess if you don't need my genius ideas, I'll just start my own babysitting business and steal all your clients. Is that what you want?"

"If it means you'll leave us the fuck alone, then yeah."

A/N: Hope y'all like these hcs! I'll probably make romantic ones soon. I'm already working on some more South Park stuff, I got a few requests I'm really excited to write! Please like, follow, and repost! XX, Starr!

Wordcount:2747

#south park #south park x reader #kyle brovlofski x reader #kyle x reader #kyle broflovski #stan marsh x reader #stan marsh #stan x reader #kenny x reader #kenny mccormick x reader #kenny mccormick

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justauthoring · 1 year ago

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naturally [7]

you fit into their little family perfectly - naturally. -> in which you have a little surprise for nanami

a/n: honestly this is really short and not my best, but i just wanted to get something out while i had the chance (school has been kicking me in the ass dudes and it's only been two weeks :()

pairing: nanami kento x f!reader

“Trust me, he’ll love it.”

That’s what your friend had said, a sly smile on her face as she handed the box into your awaiting hands.

The same box that laid on your lap now, taunting you.

In it was a light, pale blue babydoll set with matching panties; the bralette was lace and transparent with a silk bow in the middle that connected to the skirt that was made of a sheer flowy material. You’d yet to try it on but your friend had assured you it would fit you perfectly without a doubt.

It was your fault really. When you’d told her it was Nanami’s birthday coming up, she’d practically dragged you all the way to the mall, never once letting you steer in the other direction from the lingerie shop she was certain would hold the perfect birthday gift for Nanami.

That gift, basically, in a roundabout way, being you.

And so, you’d bought it, letting her distract you from the worries in your mind because really, Nanami had never really expressed any interest in this sort of thing. It wasn’t like a lingerie set was all that scandalous, but Nanami wasn’t very sexual in any sort of way. Yes, the two of you had been intimate with one another and it wasn’t like he’d made you feel ugly — rather, he spent most of his time complimenting you, making you feel like the most beautiful woman in the world.

But that’s just… he seemed happy with just having you and not much more than that. You’d bought a cute bra and underwear for him before, but this just felt… like a lot. Too much, rather.

Would he be weirded out by it?

What if he thought it was tacky?

Your hands are shaking before you even realize it, taking another glance at the clock, frowning when you realize he’ll be home soon. Yuji was out for the evening at a sleepover, and Nanami had expressed his excitement at the fact that the two of you would be home alone after he was done at work, emphasizing on the alone part. You’d known what that meant nd the idea had appeared in your mind before you’d been able to stop it;

This was the perfect opportunity to wear it.

But you just couldn’t force yourself to put it in, your insecurities and worries making you think of the worst.

You knew Nanami loved you. Hell, the two of you were getting married in a few months… and you knew he thought you were beautiful. It didn’t take a genius to see that given the way he looked at you or the way he’d whisper the words to you every morning before he left for work. You knew all of this, and you knew even if it ended up being something he didn’t enjoy, he’d never make you feel silly or ugly or too much for it…

You knew this. And yet, everything in your mind screamed otherwise.

“He’ll love it.”

Taking a sharp breath, you steel yourself. You’re being silly. You bought the damn thing, you might as well try to get some use out of it…

Taking the thin material in your hands, you stand, slipping out of the pajamas you’d been dressed in and replacing it with the babydoll. The material feels foreign on your skin and there’s a sense of vulnerability that swallows you as you stand there in the bedroom with only it on. You gaze at yourself from the mirror, taking in everything, pulling the material every-which-way to make sure it’s on perfectly.

Before you know it, you hear the familiar sound of the front door opening and shutting, telling you you’d stood in the same spot for way too long. Grabbing your robe off of the bed, you quickly wrap it around yourself, covering the lingerie beneath as you make your way out into the kitchen just as Nanami calls out for you.

“Oh,” he smiles when he sees you, turning to face you. “There you are.”

Biting back your nerves, you return his smile with ease, happy to see him after a day apart, crossing the distance over to him and moving to press a kiss against his cheek. “I missed you, Kento,” you hum out softly, cupping his cheek as you lean back to meet his gaze. “How was your day?”

“Good,” he nods with ease. “Better now that I’m home. Did Yuji get Suguru and Satoru’s easily?”

“Yes,” you reassure. “Suguru came and picked him up at the daycare, and he assured me they’d take good care of him for us tonight.”

Nodding, Nanami steps back, slowly letting his hands fall from your waist as he moves towards the fridge. “Have you eaten already?” He asks over his shoulder, “I was thinking we could order in tonight. I’m too tired to make dinner and–”

“Kento?”

Pausing at your call of his name, Nanami leans back from the ridge, meeting your eyes. He frowns when he sees the look of apprehension on your face, concern flooding his gaze. “Is everything okay, baby?” He calls out with a soft hum.

You nod, holding your hand out towards him with your palm turned up.

He glances at you, then the hand, before letting his fall in yours.

“Come with me?” You whisper, “I have a surprise.”

He looks confused, brows furrowing as he pauses, but despite his apprehension, he otherwise obliged, letting you lead him back down the hall and in the direction of the bedroom. He doesn’t fight you, even as you reach the room, pulling your hand from his and turn to shut the bedroom door.

Then, when you stand there for a moment, he can’t help but ask; “baby? What’s wrong?”

You inhale sharply, eyes falling to the rie of your robe, forcing your hands up to pull the tie apart, feeling the robe loosen around you before you shrug it off your shoulders, letting it fall to a pool at your ankles.

Nanami lets out a sharp gasp, and ignoring the way your chest tightens in worry, you turn, moving to face him.

His eyes fall on yours, then drift lower, flickering across your body and the lingerie set, before flickering back up to your eyes.

“I bought it for you,” you whisper, fighting the urge to cover your body with your arms, hands twitching by your sides. “For your birthday. I… I thought maybe you’d like it…”

Nanami’s lips part, but no words leave his lips. He is still, silent, the silence thickening around you and swallowing you whole. The anxiety eats at you, positive he’s hating what he’s seeing and that he thinks you're tacky or shameful…

“But if you don’t like it,” you start to ramble, unable to stop the words from leaving your lips. “I-I understand. And I can just take it–”

“No, no,” Nanami rushes out, blinking, as if snapping out of his own stupor. He takes a step towards you, hand held out towards him, “no, Y/N–baby… like it? I…” He hesitates and you feel yourself freeze, before a smile curls across his lips and he’s closing the distance between you. “I love it. You look beautiful.”

Lips parting, you reach for him, setting your hand on his hips as you meet his eyes. “You.. you really think so? You like it?”

“Oh God, Y/N, you look amazing,” he breathes, words breathless as he lets his eyes drift across you once more. He takes it all in, every inch, the way the lace looks on your skin, the way it hugs your body, the bare skin… Nanami can barely handle it, his eyes mesmerized by the sight in front of him, unable to look away. “I can’t keep my eyes off of you…”

Feeling your cheeks warm, you grip his shirt tighter. “It’s all for you, Kento,” you whisper, “just for you.”

He lets out a groan, taking you by the waist and tugging you against him so your chest is pressed against his own, chest rising and falling rapidly.

“I want you, baby,” he groans, “please… please, let me have you.”

“I’m yours,” you assure, nodding at him as you chase his lips. “All yours… your birthday present, baby. I’m completely yours.”

#jjk #jjk x reader #jujutsu kaisen #jujutsu kaisen x reader #nanami kento #nanami kento x reader #nanami x reader #nanami fluff

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heyaheiya · 4 months ago

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hi sweetie, I love your work (◍•ᴗ•◍)

here's my request: pro hero katsuki x influencer quirkless reader. like how started the relationship and maybe some headcanon like hand placement, if there's pda in some events or awards, what he would answer if some1 ask him about his relationship, etc.

I hope you like my request, thank u and have a great day 💗

Omg I love the idea of katsuki with a famous non pro hero partner.

You were surprisingly popular for what you did. Makeup tutorials, reviews, grwms, ootd, vlogs. A part of your popularity was how it seemed you lived the dream life, inspiring teens all across Japan to strive for your aesthetic. (Wonyoungism lmfao).

You officially met Katsuki when you were asked to be the main interviewer on this year's annual Pro Hero Billboard Chart red carpet. When you read the email offering you this once in a lifetime opportunity, you slammed your laptop closed and sped walked laps around your bedroom. You were just a random person who posted silly footage of themselves. But now you were going to be on national TV, being on screen with the most famous faces of Japan. You were shitting yourself.

The company in charge of everything didn't really give you anything to prepare, not terrifying at all!! You spent days researching the heroes, trying to dig deep to find actually interesting things, rather than the repetitive "What made you want to be a hero?". A part of you really wanted to find embarrassing and creepily personal things to entertain the audience, but you quickly found there was a reason why you weren't a detective. 3 days straight, you attempted to stalk the heroes, and nothing. NOTHING!

The event was coming up quickly, and you had absolutely nothing. Your thick stack of cards, all decorated with the iconic design, were blank. You cried for 7 hours.

Eventually, you wrote down some questions, but rereading them, they were the most pathetic excuses for questions ever. You were spiralling. The next day, you were probably going to bomb, have no chemistry with any of the heroes, broadcasting hours upon hours of awkward tension, ruining your reputation and career, destroying the image you had spent years creating for yourself. You cried. A lot.

With a blink of the eye, you were at the red carpet, all dolled up, with less confidence than ever before. Great. The first hero you were stuck with was Deku. You assumed production noticed your panic and decided to throw you a bone.

"So, Deku, if you had to describe your pre-hero days with one word, what would it be?"

"Hmm," he took a second to think, "Bad."

Huh. No, Deku, No!! You were supposed to be the easy one! You cried internally.

"What? A nice, handsome boy like you? I bet you were popular in middle school!"

"I was bullied horrifically."

Damn.

Eventually, you'd managed to get past Deku, Red Riot, Sun Eater, and more. And it was awful. Just one more until your break. Just one more.

Praying to get an easy one, out walks Dynamight. Why do you hate me, God????

He was tall, brooding, and bad with interviews. You were hoping he'd just kill you so you wouldn't have to live with the memory of fucking up infront of the country.

"So- Dynamight. What inspired that name?" Fake it till you make it ig. You grit your teeth in discomfort.

There's a long pause before:

"Dynamite."

"Yeah, what inspired it?"

"Dynamite."

"Dude I just wanna go home, please don't make this harder."

"FUCK! DYNAMIGHT COMES FROM THE ENGLISH WORD DYNAMITE! I JUST CHANGED THE SPELLING OF "MITE" TO "MIGHT" CAUSE ALL MIGHTS FUCKING COOL AS FUCK!"

"Don't yell at me! :("

Dynamight's PR team advised him to keep his answers short and to hold in his anger until he was off screen. You'd assumed he'd been holding in his sass for the past 5 hours, so it was only natural he'd blow up soon. (Like dynamite lol)

As soon as you got home from that shit show, you quickly noticed how your name was trending on twitter.

Welp, time to see how badly I ruined my career. Goodbye fame, it's not like I spent years on you..

You slowly scrolled through your tag, skimming the posts about you. However, the more you read, the more you realised people didn't hate you. In fact, the most popular video of the night was you and Dynamight's interview. And people were.. SHIPPING YOU???

You avoided anything and everything for around a week, not even opening your blinds to let in the light. The only contact you had through those 7 days was your ugly orange cat. That was until you got a knock at your door.

That's weird, I only ordered food 2 minutes ago.

You pulled the door open, saw Katsuki, and slammed it back closed, a tuft of his fluffy blond getting stuck between the door and the frame.

"FUCK ME DEAD!"

"Sorry!!"

You yanked the door back open and looked up at the man. The commotion made your cat, Miso, perk up in fear and scratch at the tall beast of a man.

"JESUS FUCKING CHRIST! First you avoid me like the plague, then you assault the shit out of me!"

"I'm so so sorry (ToT)"

------

Headcanon time 😼😼:

This man has his hands around your waist 24/7.

However, in the privacy of your own homes, he'd be a massive cunt and keep you in a headlock, knowing you can't do anything about it. He'd stop in a second if you asked him to.

At first, he wasn't big on pda. He felt it ruined his tough guy reputation. But his PR team begged him to keep a hand on you at all times, noticing how it kept his hashtag trending. Although he makes a big fuss, he secretly likes showing you off to everyone, and showing how you're all his.

Whenever he's asked about you, he insults the shit out of you.

"Huh, y/n? Never heard of them."

"They're an influencer? Yeah, no I only keep up with actual relevant people."

He means it with love. And he makes sure you know it, smothering you with love when he gets home.

Despite him bullying you about your only real job being promoting brands in your videos, he constantly buys you stuff. You make sure to show them off in your vlogs too.

Hope you enjoyed <33333

#my hero academia #bakugou katsuki #bakugou x reader #mha #my hero academy fanfiction #bnha bakugo katsuki #bnha #gn reader

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mads-hemmo · 5 days ago

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It’s Nice to Have A Friend - Jschlatt

Part 1

Reader has been lonely their whole life. They have never been in a relationship. They don’t understand why no one will love them but their best friend, Schlatt has always been in love with them.

Part 2

Part 3

From a young age, you have always been a hopeless romantic. Your favorite content always revolves around romance of some sort. You even have had your wedding planned since you went to your first wedding at merely six years old. Your plans are forever cemented on a Pinterest board that you continue to add to about monthly. I mean your taste has changed since 2015, but some things still remain true.

The only problem is that you haven’t got to experience romance yourself. At the ripe old age of 25, you have never been in a relationship. You have had your first kiss, but it wasn’t magical. You only did it because you hated being the college kid who had never kissed anyone. You slightly regret it, but at least it was out of the way.

The only good thing is that at least you have a best friend who you made a marriage pact with. You and your best friend Schlatt, met in middle school. When you were both sad and single in high school, you made a pact that if neither of you were married by 40, you would get married. It was just a silly thing that you both constantly laugh about.

When you met Schlatt in middle school, the two of you immediately hit it off. You saw Schlatt sitting by himself one day and decided to sit by him. You had a few classes with him and thought he seemed like a cool dude. At first he acted like he wanted to be alone, but you learned soon after that he really didn't have many friends. The two of you learned you had a lot in common. You both loved Nintendo, especially Mario Kart as well as computer games.

The one difference is you loved all things romance whereas Schlatt only cared about gaming and baseball. The really fucked up thing about the universe is that Schlatt has had multiple relationships while you remain single. His relationships usually never lasted, but it was still strange. The universe also made you bisexual and you still somehow manage to be lonely. But at least you had your best friend, Schlatt and that stupid marriage pact.

The hardest moment for you was when Schlatt decided to move to Austin, Texas. It was the longest and farthest apart you have ever been from each other. You knew it was good for career and would help him grow his channel, but it sucked being apart for so long. Thankfully, Schlatt made the decision to come back home to New York. When he came back, it was like nothing changed. You had your best friend back and nothing could make you happier.

Most of your nights lately have been spent hanging out at Schlatt’s apartment playing Mario Kart like you did as kids. Tonight was no different. Schlatt was playing as a Villager and you were playing as Cat Peach. “I tried downloading Tinder again,” you say, randomly.

“Why?” Schlatt asked, his eyes located on the screen.

“Maybe there’s someone new. We live in New York. Who knows who might have moved here? Maybe my soulmates!”

“Toots, how many times do I have to tell you? One, your soulmate is not going to be on tinder and two, you’re better off with a true New Yorker than some new kid that wants to make it on broadway or some shit.”

You sigh. “Oh my god, but imagine they are on broadway! You know my love for musical theatre! Maybe we need to go watch a show. The lead being so into their part locks eyes with me and we realize we are truly in love like the characters on the stage.”

Schlatt lets out a small laugh while rolling his eyes. “You are ridiculous, (Y/N),” he says, looking at you.

“You’re just mad that I’m kicking your ass right now.”

“You wish, Fucker,” he says, his competitive spirit coming back.

The two of you continue playing until you both decide you're hungry, so Schlatt orders pizza from your favorite place. “You staying the night?” Schlatt asks, grabbing the Bénédictine bottle and a few solo cups.

“Might as well. It’s the weekend after all,” you say, pouring the liquor into your cup.

“The guest room is always open for you. However, the cats have made it their own, so they might sleep with you.”

“It would be nice to have someone or something laying beside me even if it is just cats. I did always say I was going to be the crazy cat person, but the tables have seemed to turn,” you joke.

“I’m a very proud cat dad. They make great content and the ladies love them,” Schlatt says, moving his eyebrows.

You laugh at him. You miss the way his smiles grow with each laugh that leaves your mouth. “Did I tell you I started a new hobby?” You ask him.

“No? How do you have the time to have another hobby? What happened to crocheting or reading or shipping random men together?”

“I’m still doing all those things and I ship people of all genders. Anyways, I started coloring.”

“Coloring? Like with crayons?” He asks, not in a malicious way, but with genuine curiosity.

“No, with alcohol markers and white gel pens to add highlights. I saw it on TikTok of course and it’s been really fun. It’s also very stress relieving.”

“Can I see some of your finished work?” He asks, his eyes not breaking contact with yours.

“Oh yeah, sure,” you say, pulling your phone out. Sometimes you find it strange how Schlatt actually cares about your hobbies and various interests. He never makes you feel bad about it. He just lightly teases you, but you know that’s just how he is.

Schlatt looks at the pictures you took of the pages you have colored. “Awe I love the little kitty. They are cute! This is really impressive, Toots. It looks like you printed these out. Maybe next time you come over, you should bring your markers and we can color together. Mine won’t be near as good as yours, but I bet it would be fun,” Schlatt says.

You hold your pinky out and Schlatt wraps his around yours. “I’m holding you to that, Big Guy.”

“You know I’d never break a pinky promise. You bring the markers and I’ll bring the Bénédictine.” The marriage pact was formed on a pinky promise and that makes your heart feel warm.

You hear the doorbell ring and realize that your pinkies are still connected. You quickly get up to go answer the door. You see a very handsome man holding the pizza boxes. “Here’s your pizza,” he says. “It’s not everyday that I deliver to someone so pretty.” He winks at you.

“You’re too nice. Hold on, let me grab your tip,” you smile, turning around. You see Schlatt and he hands you a ten dollar bill. “Thank you.”

“Sorry I didn’t realize you had a boyfriend. I couldn’t have flirted with you if I knew,” the guy apologizes.

“He’s not-“ you start.

“Don’t worry about it, dude,” Schlatt says, grabbing the pizza and handing him the money. “Have a good night.” Schlatt closes the door. He goes to the kitchen to grab plates before coming back to the living room.

“What was that?” You ask him.

“What? I just finished what you were going to say. That guy also was probably a high schooler.”

You just decide to not push it any further, knowing that Schlatt is probably right. “What movie do you want to watch?” You ask.

“As long as it’s not a musical, I don’t care what we watch. I recommend Tokyo Drift, but you’re the guest,” Schlatt says, with a piece of pizza in his mouth.

“We can watch Tokyo Drift. It’s been awhile since you picked the movie.”

Schlatt smiles at you. “Thanks Bub.” He puts the movie on.

It doesn’t take long for you to pass out. Schlatt knew it was inevitable. You usually fall asleep during a film and with liquor and pizza on your belly, it’s no surprise when he hears your soft snores. Your head makes its way on Schlatt’s shoulders. He smiles at you and he feels his heart start to race. He wishes you weren’t so hard on yourself and saw how amazing you were.

After about twenty minutes, he realized that you were pretty much out. Instead of having you sleep on the couch, he gently picks you up, bridal style and carries you to the guest bedroom. He carefully lays you down and places the blanket over you. He watches in awe as jambo cuddles beside you. When he knows you’re definitely asleep, he kisses your forehead. “I love you. Sleep tight, Toots,” he says, cleaning up the living room before going to his bed. Schlatt wishes you were laying beside him. He would hold you tight and never let you ever think you were incapable of being loved. He falls asleep, happy with the fact that you are asleep in his house and not with someone who doesn’t deserve you.

A/N: yay!! New fic!! Thank you to 🍓 anon, and everyone else who suggested this req!! Hope you enjoy the first part. Sorry I’m posting this in the middle of the night! Let me know what you know!!

#chuckle sandwich #jschlatt #jschlatt fanfic #jschlatt x reader #grumpy sunshine #lunch club #youtube #friends to lovers #unrequited love #🍓 anon

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anomaliex · 26 days ago

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All of the bad kids have darkvision (even Kristen, not bc of race but twilight domain clerics get like crazy darkvision??) which is neat to me.

Idk, it definitely opens opportunities for strategically taking away major light sources in battle and makes stealthing at night easier and means travel through dark caves or forests during adventures isn't as dangerous as it might be for other parties (oh. Did it help with the Night Yorb?) etc etc, but it can also just be silly I guess. It's getting late at a sleepover but they never turn on the lights and they draw on Gorgug's face after he fell asleep but most of them see in grey tones in the dark but they kinda. Forgot. And now the colours are all wrong :(

I've also seen someone say yeah Gukgak apartment almost always dark and just. Yeah. Lights out unless it's really late and they have a non dark vision guest (rare). I think there are times where Fabian gets up at the ass crack of dawn because he has to fix his hair and he just does it in the dark so no one can tell he takes that long. I think the Mordred Manor gang in a super busy week if they're stressed with school/work will set the table and sit down to eat and almost not notice it's so dark for no reason until someone goes hey my food looks kinda dull that's weird. (Assuming Jawbone has dark vision. Which he should lol. Shifters do and that's what he should count as I think??) Also all of these scenarios I'm assuming it's like winter and it's dark out for longer so dim natural lighting at best.

Oh also something something Bad Kids ultimate hide and seek dude. In weird dark caves or mines during their (not world saving but just part of school) adventures because they goof off sometimes. Riz is always hidden the longest for very very obvious reasons and he also finds everyone the fastest for equally obvious reasons (if he uses investigation rather than perception, which I think is fair even if you'd typically do perception vs stealth because it is hide and seek, then after junior year all of his friends mechanically fully just. would not be able to hide from him* without a critical success ((and raw you can't crit on skill checks lmao but in the world of Spyre you can)) and this is really funny to me) but hey technically this is awesome exercise for a rogue to keep his mind sharp during downtime this is in middle school intro to adventuring books for sure. Maybe they rule it so that Riz wins if he finds them on a very small time limit so it's actually a challenge.

Idk idk I think it's fun if people consider stuff like darkvision in fics I want darkvision that'd be so convenient

*for clarification if you're reading this without having their stats memorised like some loser it's like. Riz's investigation is +14. He has reliable talent. The worst he can fucking get is a 24. Not to mention passive investigation is a thing that they've used (when Riz being in a room auto revealed the curse artefacts that one time) so it's kinda established that he wouldn't even have to "roll". Which in universe would mean he wouldn't even have to make an active effort I guess?

None of the bad kids (other than Riz ofc) are proficient in stealth and therefore none of them could beat a 24 with stealth without critting lmao. Fabian, with his maxed out dexterity, can match it on a 19. So if Fabian rolled as high as possible without critting and Riz rolled as bad as he can does Fabian have a slither of a chance? The ruling on what happens when you tie on contested checks is kind of weird because "oh the situation doesn't change" which is obvious with like, contested athletics but in cases like these it's less intuitive. What does not changing mean when it's hiding vs searching?? Does it mean the hiding person stays hidden? Or would this be less of a contested check since they don't happen at the exact same time and more of a hider sets the dc for seeker. In which case Riz would auto succeed because you just have to meet dcs to beat them. I am thinking too much about the mechanics of some (probably drunk) teenagers playing hide and seek. As I'm typing this I'm remembering that he wouldn't have to roll to meet a 24 because yeah passive investigation of a maniac (affectionately). Yeah okay he would just notice even Fabian in all cases but the case of a critical success.

Here I note that I don't put it past Fig to acquire Pass Without Trace (magical secrets) just to gain a chance at beating Riz in hide and seek. She'd fucking do it. She goes to visit her wood elf relatives to get pointers and all. Wow this derailed this was about darkvision at first.

#rambling into the void #dimension 20 #fantasy high #bad kids #headcanons #riz gukgak #fabian aramais seacaster #gorgug thistlespring #fig faeth #figueroth faeth

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