#Life & Relationship Expert

[thatfrenchemoshithead]

All jokes aside 1 week with Merle Highchurch would fix Devo

[reindeerswillsavethisworld]

No, but you don't understand, Technus is so fucking funny, and without even trying. Like, imagine telling somebody about his whole deal, it'd be a trainwreck lmao.

"So there's this ghost who can control all kinds of technology."

"Okay."

"He looks like an off brand cosplay of Nikola Tesla and can and will villain monologue you to death."

"Yeah, okay, continue."

"One of his plans of world domination was fully dependant on making his favourite enemies-to-lovers ship canon."

"I'm sorry, what."

The most outrageous thing, tho! The thing that drives me up the wall!! Is that his convoluted plans work like clockwork!!! If Sam wasn't an MVP that she is, then Technus' plan to take over the internet by playing a fucking videogame would have been successful. Combining Technus' technology and Skulker's mastery with weapons was a real pro gamer move, and they did almost beat Danny's ass in under 5 minutes. His plan to distract both Danny and Valerie by matchmaking them was stupid as fuck and yet it fucking worked!! How the fuck did it work.

His downfalls are literally 1) his arrogance, and 2) simple dumb bad luck. The reason why he and Skulker failed was because they both were pretentious fucks and were too prideful to cooperate with each other properly despite literally sharing a body. And if Danny and Valerie were a little less afraid of the other getting hurt, he'd have succeeded there, like, for real-real.

His failings more often than not are really just unlucky coincidencies. What a loser lmao.

[edwardseymour]

good for her.

[thevalleyisjolly]

Is it just me or has the Doctor's interactions with Ruby been directly referencing/paralleling past companions? The theme of coincidence in the Christmas episode - Donna and the Doctor in Partners in Crime, constantly missing each other until they reunite and then it's coincidences galore (except not so coincidental because Dalek Caan was manipulating the timeline to pull them together...). In The Shakespeare Code, Martha asked the Doctor about changing time and the butterfly effect, and then Ruby has nearly the exact same conversation about the butterfly effect and there was a whole two minute gag about the consequences of her stepping on a butterfly. Rose and the Doctor's first big fight over Rose crossing her own timeline to save her father, and the Doctor explicitly warning Ruby that they can never cross her own timeline because of the consequences. And in Boom, Ruby both having to take charge in lieu of the Doctor and displaying a confident recklessness in ignoring the Doctor's orders to stay away and firing the gun into the air to divert the attention of the deadly AI - some similarities to Clara near the end of her arc? I don't know if this is anything, it's just interesting in light of all the in-show references to the fourth wall and how the episode card for The Legend of Ruby Sunday appears to show the behind-camera view of a TV set.

[m00n-pr1sm]

Amy Dunne Character Analysis

Disclaimer

This analysis will be of Amy’s character from both the book and the movie, although the 2014 movie adaption takes greater precedence with only some additional details and quotes included from the book as it does delve deeper into Amy’s psyche and add further characterization. Thus some traits may be accentuated further than they are in the movie, not being completely faithful to either story. It’s an analysis of Amy in her totality across mediums, of course being entirely my opinion. There are of course adaptational differences but I will not include the major ones from the books (ex. her relationship with Hillary Hand). This is an analysis focusing primarily on Amy’s neuroses she demonstrates and the childhood links to them, it doesn’t cover in-depth the events nor themes of Gone Girl.

Amy Elliott Dunne, the ever enigmatic dual protagonist- antagonist of Gone Girl is one of the most iconic female villains in modern memory, and one of the paragons of the “good for her” trope in media, is, frankly, one of my favorite characters of all time. As such I have been dying to write a full analysis examining her neuroses and characterization. Beneath the cultural perception of just another “crazy psycho” for girls to claim “she did no wrong” or “she just like me fr!”, lies a fascinating character who is masterfully written and developed by Gillian Flynn, as well as perfectly portrayed by Rosamund Pike. Amy Dunne is a character with a deep, complex psychology that I will do my best to thoroughly explore in this analysis.

From Amy’s childhood we first see the emergence of a literal high ego ideal, Amazing Amy. Of course this is the children’s book series created by her parents with a fictionalized version of Amy being the eponymous protagonist. This was a version of herself that rectified her own personal failures. Amazing Amy became a prodigy at cello, when Amy quit at 10, Amazing Amy made varsity volleyball, Amy got cut freshman year. Even in the (at time) final book in the series, Amazing Amy got married, a task Amy had not yet done. The entire book series revolved around Amy always making the most virtuous, the most selfless, the most perfect decisions.

>”With me, regular, flawed, real Amy, jealous, as always, of the golden child.”

An interesting detail in the book that is omitted from the movie is Marybeth’s numerous miscarriages and stillbirths (which totaled 7). All of these girls were named Hope, until Amy was born. Amy expresses her jealousy towards them, as they were always seen as perfect without ever living; meanwhile Amy herself has to live life everyday knowing that she will never truly live up to the Hopes. That she has to try everyday to be the best she can be. Her very birth was mired in the expectation of a perfect child; given that she was practically a gift from the heavens to her parents.

This sets up Amy’s perfectionism, as the childhood experience of never living up to a projected ideal led her to want to be perfect (and as we’ll later see, the expectation that everyone else is too), to live life always through the gaze of another. Evidently this leads to a loss of one’s inner essence, one’s individuality and sense of self.

>“-I’d never really felt like a person, because I was always a product” (Book Quote)

Amy’s obsession with personas can be seen as emerging from this, as she adapts a personality depending on who she’s interacting with, as to always be the most appealing she can, she is Amazing Amy after all.

>”I’m not sure, exactly, how to be Dead Amy. I’m trying to figure out what that means for me, what I become for the next few months. Anyone, I suppose, except people I’ve already been: Amazing Amy. Preppy ’80s Girl. Ultimate-Frisbee Granola and Blushing Ingenue and Witty Hepburnian Sophisticate. Brainy Ironic Girl and Boho Babe (the latest version of Frisbee Granola). Cool Girl and Loved Wife and Unloved Wife and Vengeful Scorned Wife. Diary Amy.” (Book Quote)

This general attitude leads to people trying to impress her as she places herself as someone special and especially someone to keep around. She entices both the characters and viewers of the film through her manufactured charisma and enchantment. However, we’ll see this dramatically backfire in her relationship with Nick, just you wait!

For now we can focus on the beginning of their relationship as well as what I believe to be Amy’s view on romance.

I believe that Amy has an impossibly high standard of love, one that stems from her perfectionism and general inability to let down her guise of being amazing. Not to mention how her parents were a perfect match, Amy even referring to them as soul-mates.

>”They have no harsh edges with each other, no spiny conflicts, they ride through life like conjoined jellyfish—expanding and contracting instinctively, filling each other’s spaces liquidly. Making it look easy, the soul-mate thing.” (Book Quote)

In her childhood it’s implied that she was into romance novels, specifically Jane Austen’s Pride and Prejudice, which obviously contributes to the idealization of romance, of a literal scripted love.

>”You were an alienated teen and only Elizabeth Bennet understood you”

I think this little quote is incredibly indicative; it establishes a sense of alienation, of Amy never quite fitting in and blending with others.

>”So many lessons and opportunities and advantages, and they never taught me how to be happy. I remember always being baffled by other children. I would be at a birthday party and watch the other kids giggling and making faces, and I would try to do that too, but I wouldn’t understand why. I would sit there with the tight elastic thread of the birthday hat parting the pudge of my underchin, with the grainy frosting of the cake bluing my teeth, and I would try to figure out why it was fun.” (Book Quote)

Back to the topic of romance, through these stories it allowed her to imagine her perfect romance: if Amy could find that one person that truly understood her, beyond the illusion, that then would constitute a perfect union of love. She does deep down (whether consciously or not) want to be loved for who she is; not the idealized, palatable, literal marketed version of herself. Thus she holds trust as a premium, expecting that if she does the Herculean task of unspooling and revealing herself to another, that the other person would love her no matter what.

>”Can you imagine, finally showing your true self to your spouse, your soul mate, and having him not like you?” (Book Quote)

However all of this culminates in an impossibly high standard of a lover, of a practically divine mythical love; where one loves totally and absolutely. Of course where this neurosis is most demonstrated is in Nick and Amy’s relationship.

Amy comments that after meeting Nick she finally felt like a person as he brought out a side of herself that hadn’t been seen, in her own words “a lightness and an ease”, something that Amy enjoyed. In her eyes they had the perfect relationship in the beginning, Nick was her compliment with the witty banter, with their inside jokes, and charm.

However this doesn’t just vanquish her childhood neuroses, through her desire to be seen as perfect, she modifies herself to be a “cool girl” for Nick, complying endlessly to standards to maintain this perception.

>” When I met Nick Dunne, I knew he wanted a cool girl and for him, I’ll admit, I was willing to try.”

Amy essentially became Nick’s image of a perfect girl, witty, fun, and most of all easy-going and forgiving.

Yet one cannot live forever in images and ideas; and as such, the real, true Amy emerged. The Amy that cares too much, that’s hard to get along with, that is a controlling perfectionist. She also tests Nick through the treasure hunts, weaving in little details about their relationship as to challenge Nick and hope that he remembers the things they do together as deeply as she does. Combined with the 2008 recession and declining health of Nick’s mother (the consequences of which will be explored later). As well as Nick’s growing dissatisfaction in the relationship (evidenced by his worsening performances in the treasure hunts, the cheating, using her for sex and ignoring her otherwise, etc). The illusion both Nick and Amy were living in crumbled; they couldn’t possibly sustain their relationship as they were both striving to fulfill reciprocating images for the other.

One of the biggest parts of her character is Amy’s elitism and entitlement, in which she thinks of herself as someone superior, someone that deserves to be loved absolutely for who she is, although only to people she considers worthy.

>”She’s easy to like. I’ve never understood why that’s considered a compliment—that just anyone could like you.” (Book Quote)

Once again this stems from her childhood, in a seemingly contradictory way, she also sees herself as special for being the one that survived from her mother’s attempts, as well as the fact that her birth was so tumultuous that she would be an only child. From this also stems her entitlement for love.

Amy actively looks down upon women she considers “average”, whom she sees as coming from mediocrity and continuously perpetuating that in their lives. She scoffs at them with her wealthy parents and NYC background until her marriage with Nick crumbles. Only then does she realize that she’s become the very woman she would previously disdain. A woman with a failing marriage, the loss of her previous wealth following the recession, and moving to a failed development in Missouri (What the hell’s in Missouri?) for Nick’s mother.

I truly believe this, combined with Nick’s infidelity, and most importantly the loss of her idyllic love culminated in the iconic Gone Girl plan.

>”Nick took and took from me until I no longer existed, that’s murder. Let the punishment fit the crime”.

Nick took Amy’s identity, her sense of self that she so generously revealed to him and rejected her. Implying that she would only be loved if played the role of the “cool girl”; stripping her of who she really was, losing herself in yet another persona. Although Amy admits she doesn’t really have a personality and lives through personas, she still has a semblance of self that she holds dear.

>”-made me realize that there was a Real Amy in there, and she was so much better, more interesting and complicated and challenging, than Cool Amy”. (Book Quote)

Worse yet, Nick had cheated on her with a “newer, younger, bouncer Cool Girl”, leaving Amy in the dust, surely damaging her pride.

But Amy truly fell in love with her idealized version of Nick, believing that she was responsible for shaping that version of Nick. That she deserved that man in his entirety, of course what gets Amy to come back to Nick is the Sharon Scheiber interview, in which he promises to make up with Amy in just the way that makes her think that Nick is the one person who gets her. He makes the little references to their inside jokes (2 fingers on the chin when they’re not bullshitting the other) and a reference to the end of the treasure hunt (always a contentious issue in their relationship). She’s reminded of who he was, that he was once perfect for her, who else could know how to appeal to her heart in just the right way? With the same passion and conviction she reverses the judgment on Nick, clawing her way back to him. She does so in an especially brutal manner, slashing Desi’s throat with a boxcutter right after he climaxes. Putting aside my enormous personal bias against Desi, he was technically an innocent man, taking a great risk in sheltering Amy. However it’s clear that Amy sees him as merely an asset and something to be disposed of once he serves his value, as another prop in her ever evolving masterplan; she did string him along for years through their letter correspondences. He was just another casualty in Amy’s search for idyllic love. She comes back dramatically, literally falling into Nick’s arms while still covered in Desi’s blood like a dress; fabricating an elaborate story about a love obsessed former boyfriend kidnapping and violating her. Despite the glaring holes in her whole story (If Amy’s marriage was as bad as she made it out to be, why did she go back to Nick so easily? How did she get access to a knife and kill him so seamlessly? Why didn’t Amy do anything when she discovered the stuff in Margo’s shed? etc), law enforcement, media, and the public all fully believe it, infatuated with the persona and narrative that Amy’s created for herself. In the end she traps Nick into the marriage and eventually, the family. The last shot of the film is a haunting recall to the beginning shot of the film, as Amy has both revealed and secured herself to be the master of the narrative, finally obtaining her perfect love, no matter what the cost may have been.

Conclusion

Through a constant demand in Amy’s childhood emerges a need for perfection, simultaneously bringing about a sense of superiority and entitlement. The use of personas and façades facilitate this, painting Amy as the most amazing cool girl for whomever she’s performing for, to feed her need to be seen as perfect and desirable. Yet there emerges a psychological detachment from others; as the need to perform inevitably leads to an internal hollowness. However underneath all these layers there also lies the true Amy who has the deep unconscious desire of wanting to be loved absolutely, to have a perfect union of love where she can reveal herself fully and be loved for who she is truly.

>disclaimer for tumblr lol, this is not me trying to claim Amy was innocent I am fully aware that she’s a terribly entitled and narcissistic person but she can still be complex and have relatable desires & be a person even if she’s massively fucked up!!

[dotthings]

Jensen stans who continue to trash Misha and deny the authenticity of JenMish friendship and how close they are or who continue to trash Danneel and the Ackles marriage are vile.

[sequencefairy]

I hope this isn’t too much to ask, but I really value your opinions on being bisexual in a monogamous relationship. If it’s not a big deal, how do you deal with bi-cycling? Or if your into women more than men at any particular moment?

Anon, beloved, I am choosing to take this as if you are asking with good intentions, because it could definitely come across as you trying to imply that being a bisexual woman, I am inherently unable to commit to monogamy given my ~slutty bisexual nature~, which is not a good look, to be honest.

So, having said that, I think that there's two things here:

Being in a monogamous relationship with a partner is a result of ongoing conversations with that partner and what we both want out of the relationship and our boundaries within it. This means, in practice, that monogamy is a commitment I am making to my partner, and he to me. This is not tied, necessarily, to my being queer or to him not being queer. In theory, if not in practice at this time, I consider myself polyamorous, which is definitely part of my larger identity as a person who is queer, but committing to monogamy in the interior of my relationship is a choice I am making in service of the commitment I have made to my partner. If we decide to change that in the future, it will involve many more conversations than the ones we have had up until this point.

I had to go look up what bi-cycling was, to be honest with you! From what I understand, it's the notion that for bisexual folks, their attraction to various genders fluctuates over time - sometimes being attracted to one gender more than another, and cycling through them. It doesn't happen for everyone, and also doesn't mean that the person is not attracted to any gender of person at any one time. So, that was interesting to learn! Personally, for me, I typically feel about an equal amount of attraction to folks of various genders. I don't spend a lot of time, personally, worrying about the division of my various lusts, because it's not important to me to know the ratio of how many men I am attracted to vs how many non-binary people vs how many women. I don't find it useful to analyze this and come up with some kind of percentage or whatever, because it doesn't change anything for me. The key thing, for me, in my relationship, is that I have made a commitment to my partner and that I love him, and that while I may be attracted to other people from time to time, managing that is not any different for me as a queer person than it would be for anyone else who is in a committed, monogamous relationship with another person. I don't act on my attractions to other people because that would contravene the established parameters of my relationship and I don't want to do that, because I love him and our relationship is something that sustains me and fulfills me and that I don't want to damage. I think being worried about fluctuating attraction inside a relationship is valid, but attraction fluctuates in ALL relationships. No one is immune to this. It's part of being in a relationship with someone. You choose, over and over, every day, to continue to be with your person, reaffirming the commitment you made, and the one they've made to you. If you, at some point, are no longer willing to make that choice, and remain committed, then the relationship needs to be re-evaluated, and perhaps, at that point, it isn't the kind of relationship you want any longer, and maybe you need to release yourselves from it.

I hope this helps!

[milfygerard]

Where did you get four months? They were very much together at the Grammys right before her tour started.

Not Physically! And not seen at a party with her! If you look a the pr removed timeline (multiple breakup/falling apart songs recorded for and then cut from/bonus tracked for midnights esp YLM hits different and dear reader, the lover house packed up/burning imagery in the visuals that likely took at least over a month if not more time to create considering the complexity of the tour, the end of the Lavender Haze and Bejeweled MVs implying a breakup as well as the Karma vid that was likely filmed pre-tour around jan-feb which includes a visual reference to the breakup, the fact songs from TTPD was being worked on before midnights was even released) It's far more likely they broke up at an unconfirmed time likely before or around the release of Midnights, possibly earlier considering how private they were as a couple.

I also want to note that if this is the case, i am not at all begrudging taylor for this. I fully think that keeping the breakup under wraps until the eras tour was about a month in progress, allowing for the tour (and midnights as an album) to stand separate from personal strife or potential PR drama, as well as giving her time to grieve and at least start to recover. I'm not always a fan of her PR and her death grip on the narrative but in this case it was necessary for her to not just for her sanity's sake but also for her art and her career. PR work and creating relationship narratives is just another part of her job and her art, it doesnt make her "fake" or anything it just makes her an image conscious celebrity which she has always been.

Unless Taylor or some reliable source close to the situation releases a tell all with exact names and dates, we'll likely never know, but I think its important to take Taylor at her word that she is artistically a narrative builder and professionally a shrewd marketer, and that her public persona and its story is as much apart of that as her writing and songs.

[percabeth4life]

Is Circe immortal? I know she is Helios daughter but what is she?

Also was helios a good dad to his daughters I know he had like 12

Circe is a Goddess of Sorcery/Magic. Some specify her specifically as a Goddess Nymph but that is still a Goddess. She is immortal, yes.

There isn't much written about Helios with his children to my memory, but Circe did invoke him in some of her sorcery. He did also bestow many gifts onto Aeetes, one of his sons, and gifted Medea, one of his daughters, her winged serpent drawn chariot. Both are considered amongst his favorites.

[limelocked]

Me, naive, yesterday: you know what? I wanna know about Connor my little cringe fail clone boy kon-el, for him I will break and read comics

Me, now, frustrated beyond all known human limits: it’s all about selling as much as possible that’s why I’m forced to have two tabs open just so I can get one guys story

[solacebean]

I’m just saying there IS a difference and it’s kinda important

[greatmotivation]

Find strength in adversity, fueling your dreams with resilience. Believe in the power of your potential, for greatness resides within. Embrace challenges as opportunities for growth, and setbacks as lessons in disguise. Stay focused on your goals, knowing that every step forward brings you closer to your dreams. Keep pushing, keep striving, for the journey of life is enriched by your unwavering determination.

[msmasims]

Introducing "Obsession Phrases Exposed," a revolutionary program crafted by the esteemed relationship expert

[messybrokenlover]

Sometimes it feels as if you helped me slit my wrists and you stood there telling me you love me, you value me, you respect me expecting that to heal the wounds. Just screaming out meaningless words, sweet nothings, stringing empty sentences together as if they would turn into sutures. You stood there watching the blood seep out from my veins, avoiding the reality of the puddle I began drowning in. I never thought that this much blood, hurt, and self-demeaning actions could exist inside one person. One small fragile being. Everything was red, but you stood there denying our reality ignoring the exposed artery. Finding every reason why you could not stop the bleeding, why you couldn't apply pressure, you could only cover the wound, as if sweeping a mess you didn't want to clean under the rug. I've bled out and I am left apologizing for your suffering, apologizing for the trauma I must've caused you, the consequences I forced on you.

[cruelsister-moved2]

"A lot of people don’t have as much fun without their partners. They may be thinking about them while they’re with you, and that keeps them from being present in the moment." i saw this on a thread and that may be the case for lots of relationship. (im the same anon btw)

this is so depressing to me like you can't enjoy time with your friends because you're thinking about your partner the whole time? also if you do bring your partner you're also not present because you'll just be clinging to them the whole time... I really don't get this like this applies for the very start of a relationship possibly but you can see eachother whenever you want and you can't spare an hour to hang out with your friends?

stuff like this is such a red flag to me this mindset is scary, especially because someone whose whole life revolves around their partner to the point of pushing everyone else to the periphery is in such a vulnerable position to IPV.... or even just if the relationship becomes unpleasant its now much harder to leave both mentally and practically. this is what I mean when I say we don't teach young people to protect themselves from abuse bc to me this is just a giant danger sign but 99% of het women think its the most romantic thing ever

[news-buzz]

Methods to Shoot Your Shot and Discover your Soulmate within the Gymnasium

iGone are the times of rolling off the bed half asleep and right into a exercise class together with your hair trying a large number and an outfit that doesn’t match as a result of in spite of everything, you may be subsequent to your soulmate. With runs happening all around the world the place members are requested to put on a particular colour in the event that they’re single, it appears gyms…