#Liar: Memoir of a Haunting

[iphigeniarising]

Liar: Memoir of a Haunting, E.F. Schraeder

[jolieeason]

Top Ten Tuesday: Halloween Freebie

Top Ten Tuesday: Halloween Freebie

Top Ten Tuesday was created by The Broke and the Bookish in June 2010 and was moved to That Artsy Reader Girl in January 2018. It was born of a love of lists, books, and a desire to bring bookish friends together. How it works: She assigns a topic each Tuesday and then posts her top ten list that fits that topic. You’re welcome to join her and create your list of top ten (or 2, 5, 20,…

[rockislandadultreads]

September NoveList Challenge: Dark Academia

It's time to go back to school! Read a book with the theme dark academia.

Did you know NoveList is a database you can access with your library card to find reading recommendations? Find your next favorite read with this fantastic readers tool! Check it out on our website here.

Piranesi by Susanna Clarke

Piranesi’s house is no ordinary building: its rooms are infinite, its corridors endless, its walls are lined with thousands upon thousands of statues, each one different from all the others. Within the labyrinth of halls an ocean is imprisoned; waves thunder up staircases, rooms are flooded in an instant. But Piranesi is not afraid; he understands the tides as he understands the pattern of the labyrinth itself. He lives to explore the house.

There is one other person in the house—a man called The Other, who visits Piranesi twice a week and asks for help with research into A Great and Secret Knowledge. But as Piranesi explores, evidence emerges of another person, and a terrible truth begins to unravel, revealing a world beyond the one Piranesi has always known.

Magic for Liars by Sarah Gailey

Ivy Gamble has never wanted to be magical. She is perfectly happy with her life. She has an almost-sustainable career as a private investigator, and an empty apartment, and a slight drinking problem. It's a great life and she doesn't wish she was like her estranged sister, the magically gifted professor Tabitha.

But when Ivy is hired to investigate the gruesome murder of a faculty member at Tabitha’s private academy, the stalwart detective starts to lose herself in the case, the life she could have had, and the answer to the mystery that seems just out of her reach.

Plain Bad Heroines by Emily M. Danforth

Our story begins in 1902, at The Brookhants School for Girls. Flo and Clara, two impressionable students, are obsessed with each other and with a daring young writer named Mary MacLane, the author of a scandalous bestselling memoir. To show their devotion to Mary, the girls establish their own private club and call it The Plain Bad Heroine Society. They meet in secret in a nearby apple orchard, the setting of their wildest happiness and, ultimately, of their macabre deaths. This is where their bodies are later discovered with a copy of Mary’s book splayed beside them, the victims of a swarm of stinging, angry yellow jackets. Less than five years later, The Brookhants School for Girls closes its doors forever—but not before three more people mysteriously die on the property, each in a most troubling way.

Over a century later, the now abandoned and crumbling Brookhants is back in the news when wunderkind writer, Merritt Emmons, publishes a breakout book celebrating the queer, feminist history surrounding the “haunted and cursed” Gilded-Age institution. Her bestselling book inspires a controversial horror film adaptation starring celebrity actor and lesbian it girl Harper Harper playing the ill-fated heroine Flo, opposite B-list actress and former child star Audrey Wells as Clara. But as Brookhants opens its gates once again, and our three modern heroines arrive on set to begin filming, past and present become grimly entangled—or perhaps just grimly exploited—and soon it’s impossible to tell where the curse leaves off and Hollywood begins.

The Cloisters by Katy Hays

Ann Stilwell arrives in New York City, hoping to spend her summer working at the Metropolitan Museum of Art. Instead, she is assigned to The Cloisters, a gothic museum and garden renowned for its collection of medieval and Renaissance art.

There she is drawn into a small circle of charismatic but enigmatic researchers, each with their own secrets and desires, including the museum's curator, Patrick Roland, who is convinced that the history of Tarot holds the key to unlocking contemporary fortune telling.

Relieved to have left her troubled past behind and eager for the approval of her new colleagues, Ann is only too happy to indulge some of Patrick's more outlandish theories. But when Ann discovers a mysterious, once-thought lost deck of 15th-century Italian tarot cards she suddenly finds herself at the centre of a dangerous game of power, toxic friendship and ambition.

And as the game being played within the Cloisters spirals out of control, Ann must decide whether she is truly able to defy the cards and shape her own future...

[redheadgleek]

Books Read April-June

I read a lot these last few months. A bunch of them were on the shorter side, but also because I've been reading more, I'm reading faster.

I've stretched my goal to read 120 books this year (10 books per month). We'll see if I make it.

April (10 books):

Sister Outsider: Essays and Speeches by Audre Lorde. I really struggle with reading nonfiction, so this took me several months to get through (I do much better with audiobooks for nonfiction). The first work I've read of hers, I'm really interested in seeing her poetry.

Frogs In A Pot: How one woman mentally and physically abused five men in her life - and her own daughter - to satisfy her narcissistic needs by K.D. Kinz. I already ranted about this one.

An Absolutely Remarkable Thing by Hank Green. Sci-fi meets social media culture. Ended on a cliffhanger, not sure when I'll get to the sequel.

The Rose That Grew from Concrete by Tupac Shakur. He had some really lovely thoughts. Gone way too soon.

Spell Bound by F.T. Lukens. Not quite as good as their other books (Monster of the Week and Ever After are fantastic), but still enjoyable.

The Bandit Queens by Parini Shroff. Recommended by @ckerouac. I loved it until around the last 30 pages. It just felt rushed of an ending.

Solutions and Other Problems by Allie Brosh - this was much more heavy than Hyperbole, in both content and weight (the book was a workout).

*In the Lives of Puppets by TJ Klune. A retelling of sorts of Pinocchio (reminded me a lot of A.I. which I loved even though the critics did not). It's weird and lovely and while not exactly happy, it's wistfully hopeful.

O Lady, Speak Again by Dayna Patterson - a collection of poetry using Shakespeare's female characters as the voices. I would love an audio version.

Bryony and Roses by T. Kingfisher. A dark, little more adult, Beauty and the Beast retelling. Very imaginative.

May (13 books):

Madison by Ngozi Ukazu. I'm not sure I should really count this, but it was a delightful little comic to close out the Check Please universe.

The Ten Thousand Doors of January by Alix Harrow. I struggled with the beginning, but there were some great little twists towards the middle.

Assassin of Reality by Marina and Sergey Dyachenko. The sequel to Vita Nostra which I haven't stopped thinking about since I read it earlier this year. It was still off-balance and haunting, and I'm still left with questions. Sergey died this year, so it's uncertain if there will be another book to finish.

The Sleeper and the Spindle by Neil Gaiman. A Sleeping Beauty/Snow White retelling with some absolutely gorgeous illustrations. Lots of twists in this short story.

*The Raven and The Reindeer by T. Kingfisher. Retelling of the Snow Queen. I really liked this one - I felt cold through the whole thing.

The Hollow Places by T. Kingfisher. Very creepy in world building and the horror was a slow drawn-out dawning, but it sort of fell flat in the end.

Tastes Like War: A Memoir by Grace Cho. A half Korean woman recalls the relationship with her mother, who is diagnosed with schizophrenia. This was a "Everybody Reads" book club book from my library. I found the writing quite engrossing. There's a lot of controversy with it, with her brother calling the author a liar - but as he and his wife spend every moment of their free time replying to anybody who says anything positive about the book and they also have this "there isn't any racism any more!" attitudes, I've had heaps of salt with their perspective.

*Spinning Silver by Naomi Novik - a Rumpelstiltskin retelling, but it weaves in several other fairy tales. This one is unique because there's about a dozen 1st person perspectives (who aren't identified, you figure them out from the context) who tell the story. Makes me want to read more of her books.

This Is How You Lose the Time War by Max Gladstone and Amal El-Mohtar. I wanted to love this because everybody else is. And I didn't. It was okay, it just wasn't fantastic.

*Simon Sort of Says by Erin Bow. Middle school novel about a kid who is the only survivor of a school shooter and then moves to the middle of nowhere to escape it all. The friendships were the best and it made me feel all the emotions.

The Crane Husband by Kelly Barnhill. Yes, May was my month of reading fairy tale retellings, this one of the Crane Wife. Weird and short. I'm looking forward to reading When Women Were Dragons.

The Remarkable Retirement of Edna Fisher by E.M. Anderson. This was a book based on that tumblr post circulating around about the chosen one being an old woman instead of a teenager. It was enjoyable, mostly, but did feel like it was trying to check off all of the diversity boxes, and the ending was rushed.

The Ruthless Lady's Guide to Wizardry by C.M. Waggoner. Apparently it's sort of a sequel to another book. Knowing that would have helped. The undead mouse character was the best.

June: It's Pride Month! (12 books)

Queerly Beloved by Susie Dumond. Once a bridesmaid, forever a fake bridesmaid? Some fun characters in this one.

The Thirteenth Tale by Diane Setterfield. Read as part of my friends-recommendation challenge - I own this book and my sister has been trying to get me to read it for years. I still haven't quite decided how I feel about it. The atmosphere was deliciously Gothic.

Imogen, Obviously by Becky Albertalli. I related a lot to this book, of figuring out who you are, and how boxes and definitions may not fit you. I wish that Becky would start writing books about college students instead of high schoolers though.

Kiss & Tell by Adib Khorram. A quick read.

Loveless by Alice Oseman. I was really disappointed by this book. The characters and plot weren't well fleshed out.

*Jonathan Strange & Mr Norrell by Susanne Clarke, audiobook. Shortly after this book came out (nearly 20 years ago), I started reading it and got about half way through before getting distracted and I never finished it. I started listening to this at the beginning of March. It was 32 hours long. It's such a slow developing, meandering story, and I absolutely loved it. I felt completely immersed in the world.

Kiss Her Once For Me by Alison Cochrun. "A Charmed Offensive" was better but it was a nice twist on the fake dating trope. Although for taking place in Portland, very little of it actually took place in Portland.

Lily and the Octopus by Steve Rowley. I loved "The Guncle" so much that I bought this when it went on sale and put away all of my other books to read it. It was ... weird. I think part of it is that I don't have a pet, but also the voice of his dog kept changing? It's magical realism, part The Life with Pi and part Moby Dick.

Scythe by Neil Shusterman. Friend-recommendation. A dark utopia and a sort of fascinating exploration about death. I'm on the waiting list for the other books of the trilogy.

*What My Bones Know: A Memoir of Healing from Complex Trauma. Audiobook. Friend recommendation. An Asian woman explores the relationship of her abusive mother and her recovery from complex PTSD. I listened to the audiobook, and while I don't have PTSD or a history of abuse, it surprised me how much I related to her. The last chapters about love and connection were really healing to listen to.

*Above Ground by Clint Smith. Audiobook. His poetry about about parenting, but also about racism and connecting to the past. Really powerful and lyrical.

*The Song of Achilles by Madeline Miller. I do love a Greek tragedy and this one was so good.

Currently reading:

The House Witch by Delemhach. The writing kinda sucks, but I like the idea and plot?

The Grace of Wild Things by Heather Fawcett. It's an Anne of Green Gables-inspired book about a young orphan witch who seeks out a reclusive woman as her mentor. It's utterly delightful.

The Celebrants by Steve Rowley. "The Guncle" may have been a one hit wonder for his writing for me, because I'm a couple of chapters in and I'm already annoyed.

A Taste of Gold and Iron by Alexandra Rowland. I've heard lots of good things about this one.

The Girl Who Fell Beneath the Sea by Axie Oh. Audiobook. I'm loving the narrator - for a while, I thought it was the actress who plays La'an on SNW as they have very similar cadences.

Next up: Book Lovers, When Women were Dragons, The Invisible Life of Addie LaRue, Thunderhead, and A House of Good Bones. Still on my "friend recommendations for 2023" to-read list: The School for Good Mothers by Jessamine Chan, Kaikeyi by Vaishnavi Patel, Tomorrow and Tomorrow and Tomorrow by Gabrielle Zavin, Anxious People by Fredrik Backman, The Emperor's Soul by Brandon Sanderson, Sweet Like Jasmine by Bonnie Gray, Remarkably Bright Creatures by Shelby Van Pelt, Dinners with Ruth by Nina Totenberg.

[transbookoftheday]

Fierce Femmes And Notorious Liars by Kai Cheng Thom

At once a love letter and challenge to the traditional transgender memoir, Fierce Femmes and Notorious Liars is a playful, surrealist dance through queer coming of age.

A haunted young girl (who happens to be a kung-fu expert and pathological liar) runs away from an oppressive city, where the sky is always grey, in search of love and sisterhood--and finds herself in a magical place known only as the Street of Miracles.

There, she is quickly adopted into a vigilante gang of glamorous warrior femmes called the Lipstick Lacerators, whose mission is to scour the Street of violent men and avenge murdered trans women everywhere. But when disaster strikes, can our intrepid heroine find the truth within herself in order to protect her new family and heal her broken heart?

[thesinsemillier]

RIP Sinéad, My Patron Saint of Rage 

Content warning: CSA, suicidal ideation 

When The Lion and the Cobra was released in 1987, I was an exchange student spending my senior year of high school in West Berlin. My mom and stepdad sent me the cassette tape and I was instantly drawn to Sinéad O’Connor’s unique voice and most of all, her anger and grief. Painful secrets from my childhood haunted me day and night, and I couldn’t get anyone to listen or help. I was deemed weak for not being able to simply forget about the abuse and move on. Worse, others called me a liar, even in my own family, though they knew better. By middle school, we’d moved from just outside Boston to a small town in central Massachusetts where I was relentlessly bullied until I left for the exchange program. Every day, I tried to avoid brutal beatings by getting to school two hours early and leaving at least an hour late, hiding in spaces where they wouldn’t find me. As the only punk-Goth girl in that Lovecraftian, small-town high school, broken by PTSD that I didn’t know I had from childhood, I was an easy target. Sinéad’s rage-filled howls awoke my own anger about my past. It was liberating. Only 3 years older than me, she was like the renegade sister I never had. 

I came home from my year abroad to find my mom and stepdad were facing a failing marriage. The way my stepdad broke my mom’s heart shattered her. I remember him sitting on the front stoop one evening, watching the sunset as he contemplated his future without us. Playing The Lion and the Cobra was like setting off a weapon. Tears abound, especially if my mom was around when “Troy” played. Yet, it was one of my favorite albums because of its therapeutic effect—it was the only way I knew how to express my rage.  

When her tears fell in the video for “Nothing Compares 2 U” in 1990, the raw pain in Sinéad’s soul was laid bare. When she shredded that photo on the SNL stage, I cheered as a survivor of CSA. My abuse occurred outside of church, but after, I was sent to Sunday school as part of the effort to make me forget and move on. In a lesson where “Jesus protects the little children” was the theme, I raised my hand and asked why I wasn’t protected. The Sunday school teacher, exasperated with the interruption, told me that whatever had happened to me, I had it coming. As a result, I went to war with the church at the age of 6 and eventually found spiritual solace in Celtic paganism.  

I can’t even begin to count how often I danced alone well into the night to those songs, “Jackie” being my personal favorite on the album, though honestly each song is perfect. Whiskey and a small pipe full of cannabis fueled my cathartic, music-filled escapist nights when I was stuck in a dead-end, stifling job  that was adding ever more layers of trauma to my life. I finally started a new career ten years ago, but those music-filled nights continued as a means of therapy as I sought release from so many years of anger and sorrow.  

I didn’t know anything about her personal life until I read her memoir, Remeberings: Scenes from My Comlicated Life, in 2022. I had recently been diagnosed with complex PTSD (CPTSD), and Sinéad’s book had a powerful impact on me. It helped me heal. Although our backgrounds are very different, there were enough similarities in essence. I related to her state of mind. I inherited plenty of generational trauma from my Irish heritage and her account of life in Ireland gave me some deeper insights into a history that I’m only just learning more about now. I was following her on Twitter when her son Shane committed suicide and she was tweeting from the hospital where she was staying after being tempted by the idea of suicide herself. And it wasn’t the first time, as she explained in her book. Her mourning, her wild humor, her snark as she addressed any haters on Twitter resonated in my soul.  

Today’s news of her death breaks my heart. Many of us who struggle with mental illness know those dark spaces where death seems to offer a peace from the chaos we find here in the world. Her music guided me and so many of my fellow GenX friends through difficult times—times we faced with a maelstrom of emotion. We raged, we sang, and we tried our best to hide our pain throughout all of it.  

Airím uaim thú, mo deirfiúr álainn. Thank you for sharing your voice with us. I’ll always carry your songs in my heart.  

[finishinglinepress]

NEW FROM FINISHING LINE PRESS: Judy Garland is Not a Sunrise by E.F. Schraeder

ADVANCE ORDER: https://www.finishinglinepress.com/product/judy-garland-is-not-a-sunrise-by-e-f-schraeder/

The author of the gothic novella Liar: Memoir of a Haunting (Omnium Gatherum, 2021) and other works, E.F. Schraeder often writes about not quite real worlds. Schraeder is an avid gardener and hot pepper enthusiast who believes in ghosts, magic, and dogs. You can find news and say hello online at efschraeder.com.

ADVANCE PRAISE FOR Judy Garland is Not a Sunrise by E.F. Schraeder

In Judy Garland is Not a Sunrise, E. F. Schraeder coaxes Amy Winehouse’s life from somber shadows into a powerful klieg spotlight, with insightful poems that are both dissection and homage. In “Cameras and Ink,” she notes that Winehouse is …swimming in vinegar, a brine of declension; in “Junk,” she observes that Her noose <is a> a microphone / swinging. Schraeder’s concluding poem in the collection, “Twenty Seven,” nails it succinctly: Don’t worry about much / or over commit, / we tell ourselves: / we have time. / And we do / until we don’t. Whether or not you are familiar with Winehouse and her music, these poems are sure to rock you.

–Dianne Borsenik, Raga for What Comes Next (Stubborn Mule Press, 2019)

Judy Garland is Not a Sunrise is a meditation on fame and the horrors and responsibilities that come along with it, for better or worse. This collection gives an honest look into the life and lifestyle of artists and discusses how fans oftentimes marry suffering to the creation of art, all while commenting on mental health, the body, and how the heart processes pain, overstimulation, and the need to constantly produce and survive. A must-read for poets and artists alike.”

–Stephanie M. Wyotovich, Bram Stoker Award® winner

Lyrical and melancholy, Schraeder’s Judy Garland is Not a Sunrise is an unfiltered Norma Jean tribute to songstress Amy Winehouse. A small volume with ‘velvet insides’, this collection comprises exquisite ‘fire-kiss’ poems that ‘sing from the veins’ on ashtray-regret themes of self-destruction and addiction. An unsettling and compelling offering from an exceptional voice in horror poetry.”

–Lee Murray, USA Today Bestselling author and double Bram Stoker Award® winner

Please share/repost #flpauthor #preorder #AwesomeCoverArt #read #poems #literature #poetry

[uraynoro]

Read The Liars' Club -- Mary Karr

Read PDF The Liars' Club Ebook Online PDF Download and Download PDF The Liars' Club Ebook Online PDF Download.

The Liars' Club

By : Mary Karr

  DOWNLOAD Read Online

 DESCRIPTION : Mary Karr grew up in a swampy East Texas refinery town in a volatile and defiantly loving family. In this funny, devastating, haunting memoir and with a raw and often painful honesty, she looks back at life with a painter mother, seven times married, whose outlaw spirit could tip over into psychosis, and a hard-drinking, fist-swinging father who liked nothing better than to spin tales with his cronies at the Liars' Club.

[sim69p]

Download The Liars' Club -- Mary Karr

Read PDF The Liars' Club Ebook Online PDF Download and Download PDF The Liars' Club Ebook Online PDF Download.

The Liars' Club

By : Mary Karr

  DOWNLOAD Read Online

 DESCRIPTION : Mary Karr grew up in a swampy East Texas refinery town in a volatile and defiantly loving family. In this funny, devastating, haunting memoir and with a raw and often painful honesty, she looks back at life with a painter mother, seven times married, whose outlaw spirit could tip over into psychosis, and a hard-drinking, fist-swinging father who liked nothing better than to spin tales with his cronies at the Liars' Club.

[makingqueerhistory]

Dedications from Queer Books

Some of my favourite dedications from the queer books I have come across.

*

“TO MY PARENTS,

for teaching their children about love and tolerance at an early age... and for letting us stay up to watch the ‘good’ TV shows.

TO MY BELOVED PARTNER, ED FERRY,

without whom my life-and this book-would be less complete”

-Steven Capsuto, Alternate Channels: The Uncensored Story of Gay and Lesbian Images on Radio and Television, 2000.

“For my family, blood and chosen. And for fierce femmes, fighters, haunted girls, and liars everywhere.”

-Kai Cheng Thom, Fierce Femmes and Notorious Liars: A Dangerous Trans Girl’s Confabulous Memoir, 2016.

“This book is dedicated to the memory of the men who suffered at the hands of the Nazis simply because they were gay, and to those in countries around the world who still suffer because they are gay.”

-Ken Setterington, Branded by the Pink Triangle, 2013.

“The editors jointly dedicate the work of putting this collection together to Sue Cartledge, lesbian feminist sister, who died aged 34 in February 1983 after many years of spirited writing, working and campaigning for women’s and lesbians’ rights; and also to Mark Ashton, gay brother and comrade, who died in February 1987 aged 25, after many years of keeping gay issues alive on the left and in the unions, campaigning alongside lesbians and gay men in supporting the Miners’ Strike of 1984-5.”

-Bob Cant & Susan Hemmings, Radical Records: Thirty Years of Lesbian and Gay History, 1988.

“To all those seeking the courage to assert “I am”-and especially to my lesbian sisters.”

-Barbara Deming, We Cannot Live Without Our Lives, 1974.

“To Connie

Who is the reason for it all”

-Susan E. Johnson, Staying Power: Long Term Lesbian Couples, 1990.

“This book is dedicated to all the men and women who have courageously struggled against determined, sometimes brutal, efforts to keep them from being who they are.”

-William Wright, Harvard’s Secret Court: The Savage 1920 Purge of Campuse Homosexuals, 2005.

“We would like to dedicate this book to

Abel Arias

Bill Blossom

Bill Struzenberg

Bo Huston

Chris Jordan

Christian Beaver

Christopher Morrisey

Crystal May

Diet Popstitute

James Kennedy

Jeff Heins

Jerome Caja

Miss Kitty

Patrick Leach

Rick Jacobson

Rob Chop

Scott O’Hara

Tede Matthews

Thomas O’Malley

Thor Butkus

And all our other friends whose absence makes San Francisco a much less interesting place.”

-Betty and Pansy, Severe Queer Review of San Francisco 6th Edition, 1999.

[geshertzarmeod]

Favorite Books of 2020

I wanted to put together a list! I read 74 new books this year, and I keep track of that on Goodreads - feel free to add or follow me if you want to see everything! I’m going to focus on the highlights, and the books that stuck with me personally in one way or another, in approximate order. Also, all but two of them (#5 and #7 on the honorable mention list) are queer/trans in some way. Links are to Goodreads, but if you’re looking to get the books, I suggest your library, the Libby app using your library, your local bookstore, or Bookshop.

The Faggots & Their Friends Between Revolutions by Larry Mitchell, illus. by Ned Asta (originally published 1977). I had a hard beginning of the year and was in a work environment where my queerness was just not welcomed or wanted. I read this in the middle of all of that, and it helped me so much. I took this book with me everywhere. I read it on planes. I read it on the bus, and on trains, and at shul. I showed it to friends... sometimes at shul, or professional development conferences. It healed my soul. Now I can’t find it and might get a new copy. When I reviewed it, in February, I wrote: “I think we all need this book right now, but I really needed this book right now. Wow. This book is magic, and brings back a sense of magic and beauty to my relationship with the world.” Also I bought my copy last July, in a gay bookstore on Castro St. in SF, and that in itself is just beautiful to me. (Here’s a post I made with some excerpts)

Once & Future duology, especially the sequel, Sword in the Stars, by A.R. Capetta and Cory McCarthy. Cis pansexual female King Arthur Ari Helix (she's the 42nd reincarnation and the first female one) in futuristic space with Arab ancestry (but like, from a planet where people from that area of earth migrated to because, futuristic space) works to end Future Evil Amazon.com Space Empire with her found family with a token straight cis man and token white person. Merlin is backwards-aging so he's a gay teenager with a crush and thousands of years of baggage. The book’s entire basis is found family, and it's got King Arthur in space. And the sequel hijacks the original myth and says “fuck you pop culture, it was whitewashed and straightwashed, there were queer and trans people of color and strong women there the whole time.” Which is like, my favorite thing to find in media, and a big part of why I love Xena so much. It’s like revisionist history to make it better except it’s actually probably true in ways. Anyway please read these books but also be prepared for an absolutely absurd and wild ride. Full disclosure though, I didn’t love the first book so much, it’s worth it for the sequel!

The Wicker King by K. Ancrum. This book hurt. It still hurts. But it was so good. It took me on a whole journey, and brought me to my destination just like it intended the whole time. The author’s note at the end made me cry! The sheer NEED from this book, the way the main relationship develops and shifts, and how you PERCEIVE the main relationship develops and shifts. I’m in awe of Ancrum’s writing. If you like your ships feral and needy and desperate and wanting and D/S vibes and lowkey super unhealthy but with the potential, with work, to become healthy and beautiful and right, read this book. This might be another one to check trigger warnings for though.

The Entirety of The Daevabad Trilogy by S.A. Chakraborty. I hadn’t heard of this series until this year, when a good friend recommended it to me. It filled the black hole in me left by Harry Potter. The political and mystical/fantasy world building is just *chef’s kiss* - the complexity! The morally grey, everyone’s-done-awful-things-but-some-people-are-still-trying-to-do-good tapestry! The ROMANCE oh my GOD the romance. If I’m absolutely fully invested in a heterosexual romance you know a book is good, but also this book had background (and then later less background) queer characters! And the DRAMA!!! The third book went in a direction that felt a little out of nowhere but honestly I loved the ride. I stayed up until 6am multiple times reading this series and I’d do it again.

An Unkindness of Ghosts by Rivers Solomon. I loved this book so much that it’s the only book I reviewed on my basically abandoned attempt at a book blog. This book is haunting, horrifying, disturbing, dark, but so, so good. The character's voices were so specific and clear, the relationships so clearly affected by circumstance and yet loving in the ways they could be. This is my favorite portrayal of gender maybe ever, it’s just... I don’t even have the words but I saw a post @audible-smiles​ made about it that’s been rattling in my head since. And, “you gender-malcontent. You otherling,” as tender pillow talk??? Be still my heart. Be ready, though, this book has all the triggers.. it’s a .

Felix Ever After by Kacen Callender. This book called me out on my perspective on love. Also, it made me cry a lot. And it has two different interesting well-written romance storylines. And a realistic coming-into-identity narrative about a Black trans demiboy. And a nuanced discussion of college plans and what one might do after college. And some big beautiful romcom moments. I wish I had it in high school. I’m so glad I have it now! (trigger warning for transphobia & outing, but the people responsible are held accountable by the end, always treated as not okay by the narrative, and the MC’s friends, and like... this is ownvoices and it’s GOOD.)

The Starless Sea by Erin Morgenstern. My Goodreads review says, “I have no idea what happened, and I loved it.” That’s not wrong, but to delve deeper, this book has an ethereal feeling that you get wrapped up in while reading. Nothing makes sense but that’s just as it should be. You’re hooked. It is so atmospheric, so meta, so fascinating. I’ve seen so many people say they interpreted this character or that part or the ending in all different ways and it all makes sense. And it’s all of this with a gay main character and romance and the central theme, the central pillar being a love of and devotion to stories. Of course I was going to love it.

Fierce Femmes and Notorious Liars: A Dangerous Trans Girl’s Confabulous Memoir by Kai Cheng Thom. “Because maybe what really matters isn’t whether something is true, or false. Maybe what matters is the story itself; what kinds of doors it opens, what kinds of dreams it brings.” This book was so good and paradigm shifting. It reminded me of #1 on this list in the way it turns real life experience and hard, tragic ones at that (in this case, of being a trans girl of color who leaves home and tries to make a life for herself in the city, with its violence), into a beautiful, haunting fable. Once upon a time.

I Wish You All the Best by Mason Deaver. I need to reread this book, as I read it during my most tranceful time of 2020 and didn’t write a review, so I forgot a lot. What I do remember is beautiful and important nonbinary representation, a really cute romance, an interesting parental and familial/sibling dynamic that was both heartbreaking and hopeful, and an on-page therapy storyline. Also Mason Deaver just left twitter but was an absolutely hilarious troll on it before leaving and I appreciate that (and they just published a Christmas novella that I have but haven’t read yet!)

The Truth Is by NoNieqa Ramos. It took a long time to trust this book but I’m so glad I did. It’s raw and real and full of grief and trauma (trigger warnings, that I remember, for grief, death (before beginning of book), and gun violence). The protagonist is flawed and gets to grow over the course of the book, and find her own place, and learn from the people around her, while they also learn to understand her and where she’s coming from. It’s got a gritty, harsh, and important portrayal of found family, messy queerness, and some breathtaking quotes. When I was 82% through this book I posted this update: “This book has addressed almost all of my initial hesitations, and managed to complicate itself beautifully.”

Anger is a Gift by Mark Oshiro.  I wasn’t actually in the best mental health place to read this book when I did (didn’t quite understand what it was) but it definitely reminded me of what there is to fight against and to fight for, and broke my heart, and nudged me a bit closer to hope. The naturally diverse cast of characters was one of the best parts of this book. The romance is so sweet and tender and then so painful. This book is important and well-written but read it with caution and trigger warnings - it’s about grief and trauma and racism and police brutality, but also about love and community.

The Prey of Gods by Nicky Drayden.  This is a sci-fi/fantasy/specfic mashup that takes place in near-future South Africa and has world-building myths with gods and demigoddesses and a trip to the world of the dead but also a genetically altered hallucinogenic drug that turns people into giant animals and a robot uprising and a political campaign and a transgender pop star and a m/m couple and all of them are connected. It’s bonkers. Like, so, so absolutely mind-breaking weird. And I loved it.

Crier’s War and Iron Heart by Nina Varela.  I absolutely LOVE LOVE LOVED the amount of folktales they told each other with queer romances as integral to those stories, especially in Iron Heart. A conversation between the two leads where Crier says she wants to read Ayla like a book, and Ayla says she’s not a book, and Crier explains all the different ways she wants to know Ayla, like a person, and wants to deserve to know her like a person, made me weak. It lives in my head rent-free.

Queen’s Shadow by E.K. Johnston @ekjohnston . I listened to this book on Libby and then immediately listened to it at least one more time, maybe twice, before my borrow time ran out. I love Padmé, and just always wish that female Star Wars characters got more focus and attention and this book gave me that!! And queer handmaidens! And the implication that Sabé is in love with Padmé and that’s just something that will always be true and she will always be devoted and also will make her own life anyway. And the Star Wars audiobooks being recorded the way they are with background sounds and music means it feels like watching a really long detailed beautiful Star Wars movie just about Padmé and her handmaidens.

Sissy: A Coming of Gender Story by Jacob Tobia. I needed to read this. The way Tobia talks about their experience of gender within the contexts of college, college leadership, and career, hit home. I kept trying to highlight several pages in a row on my kindle so I could go back and read them after it got returned to the library (sadly it didn’t work - it cuts off highlights after a certain number of characters). The way they talk about TOKENISM they way they talk about the responsibilities of the interviewer when an interviewee holds marginalized identities especially when no one else in the room does!!! Ahhhh!!!

Bonds of Brass by Emily Skrutskie. Disclaimer for this one that the author was rightfully criticized for writing a Black main character as a white author (and how the story ended up playing into some fucked up stuff that I can’t really unpack without spoiling). But also, the author has been working to move forward knowing she can’t change the past, has donated her proceeds, and this book is really good? It has all the fanfic tropes, so much delicious tension, a totally unexpected plot twist that had me immediately rereading the book. This book was super fun and also kind of just really really good Star Wars fanfiction.

How To Be a Normal Person by T.J. Klune. This book was so sweet, and cute, and hopeful, and both ridiculous and so real. I had some trouble getting used to Gus’ voice and internal monologue, but I got into it and then loved every bit after. The ace rep is something I’ve never seen like this before (and have barely read any ace books but still this was so fleshed out and well rounded and not just like, ‘they’re obsessed with swords not sex’ - looking at you, Once & Future - and leaving it there.) This all felt like a slice of life and I feel like I learned about people while reading it. Some of the moments are so, so funny, some are vaguely devastating. I have been personally victimized by TJ Klune for how he ends this book (a joke, you will know once you read it) but it also reminds me of the end of the “You Are There” episode of Xena and we all know what the answer to that question was.... and I choose to believe the answer here was similar.

You Should See Me in a Crown by Leah Johnson. I wish I had this book when I was in high school. I honestly have complicated feelings about prom and haven’t really been seeking out contemporary YA so I was hesitant to read this but it was so good and so well-written, and had a lot of depth to it. The movie (and Broadway show) “The Prom” wants what this book has.

Plain Bad Heroines by Emily M. Danforth. I never read horror books, so this was a new thing for me. I loved the feeling of this book, the way I felt fully immersed. I loved how entirely queer it was. I was interested in the characters and the relationships, even though we didn’t have a full chance to go super deep into any one person but rather saw the connections between everyone and the way the stories matched up with each other. I just wanted a bit of a more satisfying ending.

Honorable Mention: reread in 2020 but read for the first time pre-2020

Red White & Royal Blue by Casey McQuiston. I couldn’t make this post without mentioning this book. It got me through this year. I love this book so much; I think of this book all the time. This book made me want to find love for myself. You’ve all heard about it enough but if you haven’t read this book what are you DOING.

In Other Lands by Sarah Rees Brennan @sarahreesbrennan​ . I reread this one over and over too, both as text and as an audiobook. I went for walks when I had lost my earbuds and had Elliott screaming about an elf brothel loudly playing and got weird looks from someone walking their dog. I love this book so much. It’s just so fun, and so healing to read a book reminiscent of all the fantasies I read as a kid, but with a bi main character and a deconstruction of patriarchy and making fun of the genre a bit. Also, idiots to lovers is a great trope and it’s definitely in this book.

Aristotle and Dante Discover the Secrets of the Universe by Benjamin Alire Sáenz. This book is forever so important to me. I am always drawn in by how tenderly Sáenz portrays his characters. These boys. These boys and their parents. I love them. I love them so much. This is another one where I don’t even know what to say. I have more than 30 pages in my tag for this book. I have “arda” set as a keyboard shortcut on my phone and laptop to turn into the full title. This book saved my life.

Last Night I Sang to the Monster by Benjamin Alire Sáenz. This book hurts to read - it’s a story about trauma, about working through that trauma, healing enough to be ready to hold the worst memories, healing enough to move through the pain and start to make a life. It’s about found family and love and pain and I love it. It’s cathartic. And it’s a little bit quietly queer in a beautiful way, but that’s not the focus. Look up trigger warnings (they kind of are spoilery so I won’t say them here but if you have the potential to be triggered please look them up or ask me before reading)

Ella Enchanted by Gail Carson Levine.  When asked what my all time favorite book is, it’s usually this one. Gail Carson Levine has been doing live readings at 11am since the beginning of the pandemic shut down in the US, and the first book she read was Ella Enchanted. I’ve been slowly reading it to @mssarahpearl and am just so glad still that it has the ability to draw me in and calm me down and feels like home after all this time. This book is about agency. I love it.

Radio Silence by Alice Oseman @chronicintrovert . I’ve had this on my all-time-faves list since I read it a few years ago and ended up rereading it this year before sending a gift copy to a friend, so I could write little notes in it. It felt a little different reading it this time - as I get further away from being a teenager myself, the character voice this book is written in takes a little longer to get used to, but it’s so authentic and earnest and I love it. I absolutely adore this book about platonic love and found family and fandom and mental illness and abuse and ace identity and queerness and self-determination, especially around college and career choices. Ahhh. Thank you Alice Oseman!!!

Leia: Princess of Alderaan by Claudia Gray @claudiagray​ . I have this one on audible and reread it several times this year. I love the fleshing out of Leia’s story before the original trilogy, I love her having had a relationship before Han, and the way it would have affected her perspective. I also am intrigued by the way it analyses the choices the early rebellion had to make... I just, I love all the female focused new Star Wars content and the complexity being brought to the rebellion.

[biandlesbianliterature]

2020 Sapphic New Releases On My TBR!

Young Adult:

The Sound of Stars by Alechia Dow: An Earth invaded by aliens, where emotion is illegal. Ellie keeps a secret illicit library, and it's discovered by the alien M0Rr1S--but he's intrigued by human art. Illegal library + road trip!

Music From Another World by Robin Talley: I loved Talley's Pulp, a historical YA about lesbian pulp fiction, the 1950s, and queer girls today. This is another historical YA, this time set in the 70s, and I hope it lives up to her previous one!

The Henna Wars by Adiba Jaigirdar: Rival henna shops YA! Rivals to lovers!

You Should See Me in a Crown by Leah Johnson: Two girls both running for prom queen (and the associated scholarship) fall in love! (I didn't know rivals to lovers was a trope I was looking for, but apparently it is.)

Blood Countess by Lana Popović: I like reading f/f horror in October, and this is an Elizabeth Báthory story, which I always find fascinating. I've been looking for a sapphic take!

When We Were Magic by Sarah Gailey: I loved Gailey's River of Teeth, and I'm excited for Magic for Liars, so of course her first YA is on my list. This is also sapphic witches!

Girl, Serpent, Thorn by Melissa Bashardoust: I loved Bashardoust's Girls Made of Snow and Glass, a fairy tale-inspired YA, so I know this one--based on Persian mythology--will be right up my alley.

Out Now: Queer We Go Again! edited by Saundra Mitchell: All Out is an incredible YA anthology, encompassing so many queer identities, and reclaiming a happy queer past. So of course I'm going to be picking up the contemporary anthology in the same vein.

I Kissed Alice by Anna Birch: enemies-to-lovers f/f YA romcom plus fanfiction. What could be better?

This Is All Your Fault by Aminah Mae Safi: Three teens working together to try to save their indie bookstore, with an Empire Records vibe.

Adult:

The Seep by Chana Porter: trans lesbian weird fiction/dystopia?? This is what I've been waiting for!

Upright Women Wanted by Sarah Gailey: Sarah Gailey again! Queer outlaw librarians on horseback!

The Mercies by Kiran Millwood Hargrave: An all-women island, followed by witch trials, with an f/f romance? Colour me intrigued.

The Animals at Lockwood Manor by Jane Healey: I love the sound of this book--a haunted house narrative with a museum's whole mammal collection as backdrop? Plus an f/f romance? I didn't know I wanted this!

Something to Talk About by Meryl Wilsner: A photo of celebrity Jo and her assistant Emma laughing together gets them labelled a couple, and the paparazzi goes out of control. The rumour wasn't true when it started... but as they spend more time together, they realize it may be coming true after all.

All My Mother’s Lovers by Ilana Masad: After Maggie's mother dies, she leaves 5 envelopes, all addressed to men Maggie has never heard of. Now she is on a road trip to hand-deliver this letters and learn about her mother's hidden life. This sounds like a darker version of 13 Little Blue Envelopes, and I am on board for it.

You Exist Too Much by Zaina Arafat: Honestly, that title alone would do it for me, but I'm also intrigued by this Palestinian-American main character who ends up at a treatment centre for her "love addiction" (being queer).

For even more, check out these lists:

Book Riot's 20 Queer YA Books For Your 2020 TBR

LGBTQ Reads's LGBTQIAP YA 2020 Preview: January-June

LGBTQ Reads's 2020 LGBTQAP Adult Fiction Preview: January-June

LGBTQ Reads's TBRainbow Alert: 2020 YA Starring QTPoC, Part I

Book Riot's Most Anticipated LGBTQ Books of 2020

Book Riot's 50+ YA Books Starring Queer Girls Hitting Shelves in 2020

LGBTQ Reads's TBRainbow Alert: 2020 Graphic Novels and Memoirs, Part I

If you like what we do here, support the Lesbrary on Patreon at $2 or more a month and be entered to win a queer women book every month!

[jolieeason]

December 2021 Wrap Up

December 2021 Wrap Up

I know this is late but my kids were on winter vacation and I decided that I was going to unplug for 2 weeks (well 3 because my 16-year-old tested out of her End of Course testing and she was home). Unfortunately, that did carry over to my reading. I read nothing from December 13th to January 3rd. So, I am very behind on NetGalley ARC’s. Not so much with Indie authors, though. I have those all…

[michaelbogild]

Quotes by Mehmet Murat ildan

A beautiful mind is like a beautiful path! The more you travel with it, the more you find peace and happiness!

A beautiful smile without any reason is the smile of the existence!

A bird without wings and a man without art are both condemned to wander in low places; they can never soar up to those unrivalled heights.

A cat’s New Year dream is mostly a bird! Don’t be like a cat; in New Year, dream something that you have never dreamed! Target for new things!

A good book is a lighthouse; a wise man is a lighthouse; conscience is a lighthouse; compassion is a lighthouse; science is a lighthouse! They all show us the true path! Keep them in your life to remain safe in the rocky and dark waters of life!

A little happy house is the strongest castle in this whole universe!

A long walk in a long beach shortens every kind of sorrow!

A romantic person will know from the bottom of his heart that no source of light can ever replace the mysterious beauty of a candle!

A street full of shadows will teach you what life is much better than the street full of lights!

A waterfall cannot be silent, just as the wisdom! When they speak, the voice of power speaks!

An uneducated society will eventually turn into something lower than a herd of animals!

Are you a stupid sheep in the flock or a free eagle in the sky? Look at the mirror, what are you? Are you some dullish cattle in the herd or a wise owl in the forest? Look at the mirror, what are you?

Autumn is the greatest reminder: It reminds us how dreamlike beauties our earth has and it reminds us how all these beautiful dreams can easily vanish!

Carry your bag by yourself; carry your umbrella by yourself; open your door by yourself; light your own candle! Do your job by yourself! Don’t use others! Don’t behave like a king, don’t behave like a queen! Be humble!

Clouds in the sky very much resembles the thoughts in our minds! Both changes perpetually from one second to another!

Cowards cannot pass beyond the walls or beyond the wire fences! For them, frontiers are always the end of the road!

Disappointment means that things haven’t worked out the way you wanted! And now what to do? Very simple: Stand up and walk! Cut the tragedy because our limited time must always be used for the forward movements!

Don’t follow any leader; don’t obey to anyone; crowds are slaves; take an independent stance; take orders only from your own mind!

Don’t say deep things to shallow people and don’t talk about shallow things with the deep people!

Elephants don’t know anything about the world of ants; the peaks of mountains are oblivious of what is happening on the plains!

Enlarge your windows till you get a window where you can see the whole universe with one look!

Every long separation is a test: A test to see how powerful or how weak the will of reuniting is!

Every morning is a revolution against the darkness!

Every New Year must be celebrated at the heart of nature - in the middle of a forest or by the side of a lake under billions of stars - because it is nature who has made our existence possible!

Every season has its own art and the art of autumn is to bewitch the people!

Every time it rains, the soil counts every drop to know exactly how many times to thank to God!

Farewell is a beautiful and a soft word and yet it is a horrible and a heavy thing too!

Flowers are the Romeos and the Juliets of the nature!

Flowers have the greatest talent in converting an ordinary place into a magical palace!

For a dark street, sunshine is most welcome; for a wounded soul, love is most welcome!

For a new year to bring you something new, make a move, like a butterfly tearing its cocoon! Make a move!

For the cowards, all doors are locked; for the daring, all doors are open!

For the land, the sea is beautiful; for the sea, the land is beautiful!

Forest is a dream where you may find yourself and dream is a forest where you may lose yourself!

Full moon is a good fisherman; every eyes are easily caught in his net!

Genius tries to conquer the world with art, with songs, with words; stupid tries to conquer it with sword, with guns, with arrows!

Give freedom to colours and then you shall meet the rainbow everywhere!

Great artists come and go; they are born and they die; but there is one exception who has been living for thousands of years and still continues creating new works, new beauties every year: The Autumn!

Happiness has only one colour: The Bright! The bright of red, the bright of green, the bright of any colour! Happiness is bright! It shines, it sparkles, it glints!

He who does not walk against the arrows cannot talk about the strength of his shield!

If the storm underestimates your power, nothing happens to him; but if you underestimate the power of the storm, you sink!

If we had known everything in this universe, we would have had to find another universe to feed our curiosity, because what keeps alive man is the curiosity!

If you are good at building bridges, you will never fall into the abyss!

If you are sure of tomorrow, there is no fool greater than you!

If you close your eyes, no lighthouse can help you!

If you do not have the concept of distance, you may reach an unreachable place!

If you feel you have to open a particular door, open it, otherwise all your life that door will haunt your mind!

If you have carefully examined hundred people you met in your life journey, it means that you have read hundred different books! Every person you know is a book; world is full of walking books; some are boring, some are marvellous, some are weak, some are powerful, but they are all useful because they all carry different experiences of different paths!

If you have ever walked in Paris, you will see that Paris will ever walk in your memoires!

If you love yourself first, you will find your Valentine much quicker!

If you move faster than the music, it will look strange; if you move slower than the music, it will look strange! Be like autumn leaves which follow exactly the rhythm of the wind!

If you open your eyes very wide and look around you carefully, you will always see a lighthouse which will lead you to the right path! Just watch around you carefully!

If you see a castle under fog, you must walk there to meet the extraordinary dreams!

In a society where everyman is fox-minded, you need to be foxier than the fox!

In autumn, don’t go to jewelers to see gold; go to the parks!

In deep waters, you encounter only the wise and the brave; in shallow waters, the ignorant and the coward!

In defeat, look at the stars; in victory, look at the ground! From the stars, you get hope; from the ground, you get caution.

In the middle of nowhere, an old wooden bridge is a golden bridge!

Instead of politicians, let the monkeys govern the countries; at least they will steal only the bananas!

Leave city, leave reality; enter forest, enter fantasy!

Let me tell you something big: Give importance to little things!

Let the people discover you! You might have the key of the locked doors in their lives! Open yourself to the world; you might be the magic the world needs!

Let yourself disappear in the darkness; if you are loved, people will come and find you with torches in their hands! Love is a great searcher; it always searches the loved one! To see who really love you, just disappear!

Lighten your life with a simple life!

Magic of the nights is always much impressive than the magic of the days!

Man must be able to think freely and he must be able to express his thoughts freely! He who is against this is not only fascist and primitive but at the same time is a very great coward also! Only the brave and the honourable men are never afraid of freedom of thought and freedom of expression of ideas! Just like the cockroaches do not like the light, evil minds also do not like the freedom of thoughts!

Man must behave like a lighthouse; he must shine day and night for the goodness of everyman.

Max Lucado says that ‘A man who wants to lead the orchestra must turn his back on the crowd.’ That is true and a man who wants to find out the truth must also do the same thing!

New Year’s most glorious light is sweet hope!

No flower is happy in a vase, because vase is nothing but an ornate coffin for the flower.

No king has a throne more beautiful than a bench covered with the autumn leaves!

No matter how right or how beautiful your path is, never try to impose your path on others! Remember that flowers by no means pull bees by force to their world! Your path is your poem; if people like your poem, they will fondly join you in your path!

No season appeals to the eyes as much as autumn; no season touches the souls as powerfully as autumn and no season invites us to the world of mournful thoughts as intensely as autumn!

Not every lake dreams to be an ocean. Blessed are the ones who are happy with whom they are.

Nothing is more mysterious than watching a lonely man who is taking for a night walk in a foggy street!

Photography is an art of teleporting the past into the future.

Pigs are dirty, but I will tell you something dirtier: Liars! Untruth always smells like rotten garbage!

Rain is nature’s art; umbrella is man’s art.

Real love and Sun have something in common; they are so bright that they don't have shadows, they are free of darkness!

Rumi says love turns thorns into flowers. This means that hate turns flowers into thorns!

Searching for the real faces of every face we met! This is what our life is!

Silent streets have many things to say.

Similar souls wander in the similar places! They may not know each other, but often they touch the same winds, they step on the same leaves, their looks are lost in the same horizons!

Simple life and peaceful mind are very close friends!

Smile is a good reply to the dark world.

Some looks are heavier than the thickest books because they carry the saddest stories of life!

Something reduces the speed of the world and that something is stupidity! Stupidity is a boring friction!

Sometimes you must do crazy things to discover the life beyond your life, to enter the unknown zone beyond your known zone!

Strong winds create giant waves; strong wills create giant men!

Sun gives light; torch gives light, candle gives light; smiling gives light.

Sunset is so marvellous that even the sun itself watches it every day in the reflections of the infinite oceans!

Sunset is the opening music of the night.

The best thing you can give to a child is to create an environment where the child can develop an independent mind so that he will be the man of no one and the instrument of no system!

The fate of the bridges is to be lonely; because bridges are to cross not to stay!

The first step to be a good man is this: You must deeply feel the burden of the stones someone else carrying.

The greatest storms on our Earth break not in nature but in our minds!

The Moon always finds an opportunity to turn our attention from the ground beneath our feet to the sky above our head!

The most beautiful springs are those that come after the most horrible winters!

The most beautiful sunset is the one which suddenly appears in front of you while you are walking pensively!

The most precious light is the one that visits you in your darkest hour!

The scent of the morning is prepared by the night; the scent of the night is prepared by the day; everything helps everything!

The trains always arrive at your station. The question is which one to take?

The wisdom of bridges comes from the fact that they know the both sides, they know the both shores!

There is a hidden message in every waterfall. It says, if you are flexible, falling will not hurt you!

There is no real silence for the sensitive ears and there is no real tranquility for the sensitive hearts!

There is nothing more beautiful than living a simple life in this complex universe!

There is so much beauty in autumn and so much wisdom; so much separation and so much sorrow!

There is so much hope in a little flower and so many flowers in a little hope!

Those who mastered in the art of falling have no fear of rising!

To get inspiration, go to the nature; for silence, go to the nature; to question the meaning of life, go to the nature; to feel the existence, go to the nature; to protect your mind, to reach the truth, to think about the universe go to the nature!

To speak with the shadow, you must know the language of the darkness!

To think is sacred; let every person think freely! To express what you think is sacred; let every person express his thought freely! If you do this, you prove that you are a conscientious and a moral human being! If you don’t do this, you just declare yourself being fascist!

Tradition kills originality; you keep repeating the same things in tradition! Behave like the sky; always create new and different things; be original!

Umbrella is comfort, rain is life! You must often leave comfort to touch the life!

Watching the infinite horizons gives you infinite dreams, infinite ideas, infinite paths! Choose a great target and then you will see that great instruments will appear for you to reach that target!

Water is the most perfect traveller because when it travels it becomes the path itself!

We are all on the stairs, my friend; some of us are going down, some us are going up!

We see what we are only through reflection and thus the more our reflections occur, the less our mistakes will be!

What do you need in the New Year? You need a dream; your dream needs an action; and your action needs right thinking! Without right thinking, you can have only unrealised dreams!

What is the name of your dream? A lovely wooden cottage in the middle of a forest? Or walking in an endless autumn path? What is the name of your dream? Don’t give a name, always give a list! Fill yourself with dreams because dream is the path to reality!

What you do when nobody is there is your true you!

When everything looks like a magical oil painting, you know you are in Autumn!

When the moonlight and the waterfall come together, all other things fade from the scene!

When the spirit of nature touches us, our hearts turn into a butterfly!

When the sun is setting, leave whatever you are doing and watch it.

When you are happy, you feel the sunshine even inside the fog; when you are unhappy, you feel the fog even in the sunshine.

When you are on the bright side of life, do not forget the people who are on the dark side and remember that man can easily slip from one side to the other!

When you increase the number of gardens, you increase the number of heavens too!

When you lose your path, you get an opportunity to discover a world you have never known! And better worlds are often found this way! Darkness and uncertainty hide presents in itself!

When you read a book, book also reads you! The book will know who you are from the sentences you underline!

Winter invites white; white invites silence; silence invites peace. You see, there is so much peace in walking on the snow!

Winter is dead; spring is crazy; summer is cheerful and autumn is wise!

Wise man is the rooster of the universe: He awakens the unawake!

Without the stairs of the past, you cannot arrive at the future!

You can never leave a place unless you leave that place in your mind!

You can walk in a dream while you are awake: Just walk in the misty morning of a forest!

You either keep your childhood innocence or you rot!

You need a temple to feel good spiritually? Go to a beautiful garden!

You need new roads to discover new places!

[meeselikedramatoo]

all dramas masterlist

okay some of these totally have notes. 

#alive 100 days my prince 200 pounds beauty  38 task force  49 days 4th period mystery  a company man a day  a dirty carnival  a frozen flower  a hundred year’s inheritance a korean odyssey  a millionaire’s first love a moment to remember  a poem a day a special lady  a tale of two sisters  a tree with deep roots absolute boyfriend abyss aftermath alchemist  along with the gods: the last 49 days  along with the gods: the two worlds  an actor is an actor angel eyes  angel’s last mission: love  antique bakery arang and the magistrate are you human too?  arthdal chronicles ashfall  athena: goddess of war awl  bad guy bad guys  beautiology101  because it’s the first time big birth of a beauty - ???  black black knight: the man who guards me blind blood born again brain bride of the century bring it on, ghost broken  cain and abel  cello cheese in the trap cheo yong 1 & 2  cheongdamdong alice children of a lesser god - ???  children of nobody  chuno  cinderella and the four knights  cinderella man  cinderella’s sister  circle  city hunter  class of lies  coffee prince cold eyes  confession (2015)  confession (2019)  confession of murder (kr) confession of murder (jp)  crash landing on you  criminal minds  cyrano agency  dead friend  death bell death bell 2  defendant  derailed - ???  descendants from the sun  designated survivor: 60 days  detective k: secret of the living dead  diary of a prosecutor - ???  dinner mate  doctor john  doctor stranger doctors  dong yi  don’t click  emergency couple  empire of lust  empress ki  encounter  entertainer entourage - ???  fabricated city - ???  faith  fashion king (2014)  fight for my way  five fingers  flower crew: joseon marriage agency  forest forgotten  full house (2004)  gap dong  ghost goblin goddess of fire, jeongi god’s gift - 14 days  god’s quiz - ???  golden time  gonjiam: haunted asylum  good doctor  goong  graceful family  grand prince  granny’s got talent  green rose - ???  gu family book  gye baek  haechi  he is psychometric  healer  her private life  high society  hindsight  hong gil dong  horse doctor  hospital playlist  hospital ship  hotel del luna  hotelier  hotel king  hwajeong - ??? hwang jin yi  hwarang  i have a lover  i hear your voice  i remember you  i’m not a robot  iljimae  innocent man  insane  introverted boss investigation couple  iris 1 & 2  itaewon class item  it’s okay not to be okay it’s okay, that’s love  jang ok jung  jealousy incarnate  jewel in the palace  joseon gunman  jumong - ???  kill me, heal me  killer toon  king of baking, kim tak goo  king2hearts  kingdom 1 & 2  kingmaker  kkondae intern - ??  lawless attorney  legend of the blue sea  liar game  lie to me  life (2018) - ???  live up to your name, dr. heo  love alarm  love in sadness  love in the moonlight  love in harvard - ???  lovers in paris - ???  mad dog  maids  marry him if you dare  mask  meloholic  melting me softly  memoir of a murderer - ???  memories of murder  - ??? memories of alhambra  memorist  memory (2016)  metamorphosis  method  midas  miracle in cell number 7  mirror of the witch  misaeng  miss hammurabi  miss ripley  monster (2016)  moorim school  mother (2018)  my girl - ??  my girlfriend is a gumiho  my holo love  my id is gangnam beauty  my sassy girl (2001) my wife is a gangster (1, 2, & 3)  mystic pop-up bear  night watchman’s journal  nightmare teacher  oh my ghost (2015)  oh my venus  parasite partners for justice 2  perfume  personal taste  phanrom detective  phone  pink lipstick pinocchio  possessed (201()  prime minister and i  prison playbook  private lives  prosecutor princess psychokinesis  psychopath’s diary  queen for seven days  queen inhyun’s man  queen of mystery 1&2  queen of reversals  queen of the ring  queen seon deok rampant - ??  rebel (2017)  rebel: thief who stole the people  remember  reply 1997  reset - ???  resurrection rooftop prince  rookie historian goo hae ryung  ruler: master of the mask  running man (not the game show)  rv: resurrected victims  saimdang: light’s diary  save the last dance for me  scarlet heart-ryeo  scholar who walks the night  search: www  secret (2013)  shark (don’t look back: the legend of orpheus) shine or go crazy  shining inheritance  shopping king loue  sign - 2011  signal (2016)  six flying dragons  sky castle  socialphobia solomon’s perjury - ??  something about 1 percent  something in the rain  special affairs team ten 1 & 2  spellbound  splash splash love  stranger (2017) stranger 2  strangers from hell strong woman do bong soon  sungkyungkwan scandal  suspicious partner  tell me what you say temptation of an angel   temptation of wife  terius behind me  the bride of habaek the chosen: forbidden cave   the closer  the cursed - ???  the devil  the divine fury  the equator man  the face reader  the fiery priest  the flower in prison  the game: towards zero  the ghost detective  the girl who sees scents  the great seducer  the handmaiden  the heirs the host  the k2 the king and i  the king and the clown the king: eternal monarch the king’s face the last empress  the magician  the man from nowhere  - ??? the master’s sun  the mimic  the moon that embraces the sun  the nokdu flower  painter of the wind  the phone  the princess’s man  the producers  the queen’s classroom  the royal gambler  the royal tailor  the scarlet letter  the school nurse files  the secret life of my secretary  the secret message  the silenced  the village: achiara’s secret  the villainess - ???  the wailing - ??? the whispering - ???  the witness (2018)  the world of the married  touch  train to busan  tunnel (2016) tunnel (2017) vip (2019)  voice (1, 2, & 3)  w watcher  weightlifting fairy kim bok joo  what’s wrong with secretary kim when i was most beautiful  when the camellia blooms  when the devil calls your name  where stars land  while you were sleeping  whisper whispering corridors  white christmas  white: the melody  who are you (2013)  winter sonata - ?  witch you hee - ?  witch’s court  yi san  yong pal  you who came from the stars  you’re beautiful 

want to watch  late night restaurant  missing: the other side  money flower  my secret hotel  peninsula  revenger  the silenced  sound of a flower  take of nokdu  the throne  true fiction 

[coffeebased]

Would it be terrible if I kept doing this: popping onto WordPress once a year, for a week, just to chirp energetically about the things I’d done the previous year, before disappearing into the aether? Who would sanction me? Other than myself, of course, but I think that I have enough things to distract my conscience. My annually-updated reading blog hardly takes precedence over my other responsibilities and the reparations that have swallowed up my life.

  I know that I was due one more blog post in January 2019, about reading stats being compared across the years. How convenient it is that that is exactly what I shall be doing now, here in January 2020.

  My ideal posting schedule for 2020 will be as follows:

  2019 Books I have read and my 10 favourite ones (right now! Oh, happy day!)

2019 Reading Statistics (1/11)

Reading Statistics: 2013-2019 (1/18)

Goal-setting for 2020 (1/25)

  This was the system I tried to implement last year. Two out of three posts completed is still a failing mark. And goodness knows if I will manage to stick to that schedule this year, let alone what happens after those posts. That’s every Saturday for January settled. In previous years I used to do everything in one big post and that was great, like, very cathartic, but posts had gotten more and more unwieldy.

  This is such a heartening beginning to a blog post: complete abandonment to the four winds. No commitment! Just my own satisfaction. In 2020, forget overpromising, we are lackadaisically mentioning that we have some ideas that may or may not push through.

  I read 126 books in 2019! You can view the complete list: here. It’s the second least number of books I’ve read since I started documenting my reading habits in 2013. I’m not really surprised since I spent most of the year gathering data in the field or studying. More on that in succeeding blog posts.

  Previous year-end reading posts are here: 2013 | 2014 | 2015 | 2016 | 2017 | 2018 a b|.

  My Ten Favourite Books from Those I Read in 2019

    The Sparrow and Children of God by Mary Doria Russell

  In 2019, humanity finally finds proof of extraterrestrial life when a listening post in Puerto Rico picks up exquisite singing from a planet that will come to be known as Rakhat. While United Nations diplomats endlessly debate a possible first contact mission, the Society of Jesus quietly organizes an eight-person scientific expedition of its own. What the Jesuits find is a world so beyond comprehension that it will lead them to question what it means to be “human”.

Kid Gloves: Nine Months of Careful Chaos by Lucy Knisley

  If you work hard enough, if you want it enough, if you’re smart and talented and “good enough,” you can do anything.Except get pregnant.Her whole life, Lucy Knisley wanted to be a mother. But when it was finally the perfect time, conceiving turned out to be harder than anything she’d ever attempted. Fertility problems were followed by miscarriages, and her eventual successful pregnancy plagued by health issues, up to a dramatic, near-death experience during labor and delivery.This moving, hilarious, and surprisingly informative memoir not only follows Lucy’s personal transition into motherhood but also illustrates the history and science of reproductive health from all angles, including curious facts and inspiring (and notorious) figures in medicine and midwifery. Whether you’ve got kids, want them, or want nothing to do with them, there’s something in this graphic memoir to open your mind and heart.

    The Raven Tower by Anne Leckie

  For centuries, the kingdom of Iraden has been protected by the god known as the Raven. He watches over his territory from atop a tower in the powerful port of Vastai. His will is enacted through the Raven’s Lease, a human ruler chosen by the god himself. His magic is sustained via the blood sacrifice that every Lease must offer. And under the Raven’s watch, the city flourishes.

But the power of the Raven is weakening. A usurper has claimed the throne. The kingdom borders are tested by invaders who long for the prosperity that Vastai boasts. And they have made their own alliances with other gods.

It is into this unrest that the warrior Eolo–aide to Mawat, the true Lease–arrives. And in seeking to help Mawat reclaim his city, Eolo discovers that the Raven’s Tower holds a secret. Its foundations conceal a dark history that has been waiting to reveal itself…and to set in motion a chain of events that could destroy Iraden forever.

    Lent by Jo Walton

  Young Girolamo’s life is a series of miracles.

It’s a miracle that he can see demons, plain as day, and that he can cast them out with the force of his will. It’s a miracle that he’s friends with Pico della Mirandola, the Count of Concordia. It’s a miracle that when Girolamo visits the deathbed of Lorenzo “the Magnificent,” the dying Medici is wreathed in celestial light, a surprise to everyone, Lorenzo included. It’s a miracle that when Charles VIII of France invades northern Italy, Girolamo meets him in the field, and convinces him to not only spare Florence but also protect it. It’s a miracle than whenever Girolamo preaches, crowds swoon. It’s a miracle that, despite the Pope’s determination to bring young Girolamo to heel, he’s still on the loose… and, now, running Florence in all but name.

That’s only the beginning. Because Girolamo Savanarola is not who—or what—he thinks he is. He will discover the truth about himself at the most startling possible time. And this will be only the beginning of his many lives.

    A Memory Called Empire by Arkady Martine

  Ambassador Mahit Dzmare arrives in the center of the multi-system Teixcalaanli Empire only to discover that her predecessor, the previous ambassador from their small but fiercely independent mining Station, has died. But no one will admit that his death wasn’t an accident—or that Mahit might be next to die, during a time of political instability in the highest echelons of the imperial court.

Now, Mahit must discover who is behind the murder, rescue herself, and save her Station from Teixcalaan’s unceasing expansion—all while navigating an alien culture that is all too seductive, engaging in intrigues of her own, and hiding a deadly technological secret—one that might spell the end of her Station and her way of life—or rescue it from annihilation.

    Laura Dean Keeps Breaking Up with Me by Mariko Tamaki, Rosemary Valero O’Connell

  Laura Dean, the most popular girl in high school, was Frederica Riley’s dream girl: charming, confident, and SO cute. There’s just one problem: Laura Dean is maybe not the greatest girlfriend.

Reeling from her latest break up, Freddy’s best friend, Doodle, introduces her to the Seek-Her, a mysterious medium, who leaves Freddy some cryptic parting words: break up with her. But Laura Dean keeps coming back, and as their relationship spirals further out of her control, Freddy has to wonder if it’s really Laura Dean that’s the problem. Maybe it’s Freddy, who is rapidly losing her friends, including Doodle, who needs her now more than ever.

Fortunately for Freddy, there are new friends, and the insight of advice columnists like Anna Vice to help her through being a teenager in love.

    Tiempo Muerto by Caroline Hau

  Two women meet on the island where they shared a childhood. One is looking for her mother, the other her yaya. One is an Overseas Filipino Worker, the other an heiress. In an old bahay na bato haunted by scandal and tragedy, secrets and ghosts, the women find their lives entangled and face the challenge of refusing their predetermined fates and embracing their open futures.

    Gideon the Ninth, The Locked Tomb #1 by Tamsyn Muir

  The Emperor needs necromancers.

The Ninth Necromancer needs a swordswoman.

Gideon has a sword, some dirty magazines, and no more time for undead bullshit.

Tamsyn Muir’s Gideon the Ninth unveils a solar system of swordplay, cut-throat politics, and lesbian necromancers. Her characters leap off the page, as skillfully animated as necromantic skeletons. The result is a heart-pounding epic science fantasy.

Brought up by unfriendly, ossifying nuns, ancient retainers, and countless skeletons, Gideon is ready to abandon a life of servitude and an afterlife as a reanimated corpse. She packs up her sword, her shoes, and her dirty magazines, and prepares to launch her daring escape. But her childhood nemesis won’t set her free without a service.

Harrowhark Nonagesimus, Reverend Daughter of the Ninth House and bone witch extraordinaire, has been summoned into action. The Emperor has invited the heirs to each of his loyal Houses to a deadly trial of wits and skill. If Harrowhark succeeds she will become an immortal, all-powerful servant of the Resurrection, but no necromancer can ascend without their cavalier. Without Gideon’s sword, Harrow will fail, and the Ninth House will die.

Of course, some things are better left dead.

    Sixteen Ways to Defend a Walled City by K. J. Parker

  This is the story of Orhan, son of Siyyah Doctus Felix Praeclarissimus, and his history of the Great Siege, written down so that the deeds and sufferings of great men may never be forgotten.

A siege is approaching, and the city has little time to prepare. The people have no food and no weapons, and the enemy has sworn to slaughter them all.

To save the city will take a miracle, but what it has is Orhan. A colonel of engineers, Orhan has far more experience with bridge-building than battles, is a cheat and a liar, and has a serious problem with authority. He is, in other words, perfect for the job.

    Trick Mirror: Reflections on Self-Delusion by Jia Tolentino

  Trick Mirror is an enlightening, unforgettable trip through the river of self-delusion that surges just beneath the surface of our lives. This is a book about the incentives that shape us, and about how hard it is to see ourselves clearly in a culture that revolves around the self. In each essay, Jia writes about the cultural prisms that have shaped her: the rise of the nightmare social internet; the American scammer as millennial hero; the literary heroine’s journey from brave to blank to bitter; the mandate that everything, including our bodies, should always be getting more efficient and beautiful until we die.

  Thanks for bearing with me. Keep a weather eye for the next post.

[Reading] My 10 favourite books from 2019 Would it be terrible if I kept doing this: popping onto Wordpress once a year, for a week, just to chirp energetically about the things I'd done the previous year, before disappearing into the aether?