#Let alone a fucking MASK
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
Obito had both eyes the whole time and chose to walk around half blind for no reason, there was something wrong with that man
#Wasn’t even for the bit Madara wasn’t sighted without both of his eyes#Let alone a fucking MASK#obito uchiha#naruto
178 notes
·
View notes
Text
Little reminder for the people who forgot Kieran is 14 years old FOURTEEN meaning that any suggestive content of him automatically makes the poster of it weird as fuck ESPECIALLY if they are an adult but even if they are a minor posting suggestive stuff of a fourteen year old is still super weird so maybe don't do that
#kieran pokemon#pokemon indigo disk#rival kieran#pokemon dlc#pokemon teal mask#kieran sv#trainer kieran#pokemon kieran#IVE FUCKING HAD IT WITH THE R34 AND SUGGESTIVE SHIT OH MY GOD IM SO DONE STOP IT EVERY DAMN SITE I GO ONTO ITS ALWAYS HEY LETS GO LOOK AT#KIERAN FANART THAT SHOULD BE FUN! and OH DEAR GOD THATS R34 OKAY! HOW ABOUT WE GO LOOK ELSEWHERE AND OH! HAHA THATS AN ADULT SHIPPING#THEMSELF WITH KIERAN A FOURTEEN YEAR OLD OKAY WELL HOW ABOUT I GO LOOK AT FANFICS AND HCS? AND OH OKAY WELL THATS SUPER SUGGESTIVE EVEN THO#HE IS FOURTEEN HAHA! FUNNY GUYS SO FUNNY SO HAPPY FUN TIMES LETS SEXUALIZE THE FOURTEEN YEAR OLD!!!!!!#Like duh no shit it's the internet I can't stop it but at the same time fucking knock it off? It's not that hard and as long as it's there#You will see me ranting about it because it's not okay it's just not Im just so done with seeing it please leave him alone
73 notes
·
View notes
Text
What better way to practice new prosthetics then to piss of the bitch that got you to need them in the first place!
In other news, my pirate ocs Gali and Ido (with a third Meridi not present) who are the two sides of the fulmini cult escapees :P
A bit of backstory under the cut since they're the only fuckers I have WITH a backstory! Which btw does detail cult shit so :P big fat warning for that-
The inciting incident on Petropia that introduced it's modern underground population to the surface named the Surface Craze was in all due part because of fulmini interference at the behest of the High Override, who saw what was initially just a planet entirely made of quartz-like crystal the Override Fleet could use as a power source. Having instead found that the planet was not only populated but by a species of the living variant of that same quartz-like material - electrical properties and all - but that additionally they can regenerate their crystalline body so long as they have the energy to pull from.
Seeing this as a solution to the fulmini's energy crisis - a perpetual machine at it's finest - the High Override sought to heh... acquire some petrosapiens for themselves. To their collective benefit, a community of petrosapiens had found their faith and world shattered, previously having been extremely devoted to the Sugi religion (derived from the ancient texts of Thuugi back when their tongues were long enough to be bitten off). Instead of needing to drag away dissenters who fought tooth and nail against the invaders, this community had already shifted their faith onto the false prophet of the High Override, which already had them fall into the Coupled Override head over heels.
The cult has now expanded it's pool of prey, and like the unwilling fulmini who gives the High Override their tithe (their minds, their central colony), the petrosapien cultists pay with their arms.
50 years (or the closest equivalent) into this arrangement, 50 years Petropia spent experiencing the surface for the first time in generations, Ido was born into the cult far away from the planet she should have known as home. Any doctor worth their salt had enough brains and stubbornness to not fall into faith-based trust of the Coupled Override, so between the lack of those and the remainder pseudoscience physicians left to echo chamber themselves, when Ido began developing Excessive Compression Disorder (ECD, a nerve-equivalent disorder that causes tension fractures throughout a petrosapien's crystalline structure) despite the rather obvious visible signed she went undiagnosed and improperly treated. At the age of 200 - a petrosapien's coming of age, and 50 years after Petropia's destruction - it was Ido's time to pay her tithe and begin her offerings to the High Override.
Gali - her sacrifricant - was to sever her arms below the elbow, as was procedure. What wasn't was the near explosive response from external pressure, or the last compressive force needed to completely shatter what had already started to break.
Cutting people's arms off is technically already a violent act however, though the lower arms survived the procedure as expected, the elbow and even upper arm had scattered shards of glass-fragile crystal in a visceral radius and physically severed through the sacrificant's central colony; then Gali was abruptly severed from the High Override after they felt as if a limb began necrotising. Sacrificants nor executioners really need an active memory to do their jobs, so Gali didn't need to have memory for however long their colony was one with the High Override's. Forcefully amputated from the larger system like an infection without any of the memories of being apart of said system however, kind of rewinds a colony back to the people they remember being long before any interference.
While Ido was caught staring wide-eyed, fearful, and newly lacking the limbs she thought she could regenerate easily - her arms try and try but they shatter like glass, crumble like sand, and she violently shudders like gravel grinding into each other - Gali regained access of their long unused senses and found a sea of hostile enemy combatants staring back. With all the training of a military general with none of the present self-awareness to realise they were the cause of the currently very panicky rock's lack of arms, Gali almost like a flick of a switch reverted to the many rules of engagement regardless of the fact that they were sporting exposed central colony that may or may not have been another's with their own collection of memories.
Seeing to rescue someone who had all their rights to fear them, Gali and Ido fled to the stars.
With a few language barriers mixed with someones learning they haven't spoken much longer then anyone thought they did, discovering how planets that were meant to be each other's home have been destroyed and irrecoverable, and learning the before and after to the horror story that is the High Override and their cultist network of external nerves and collective colony, Gali and Ido may or may not have gotten arrested :P
And they probably would have been tried for crimes neither of them could particularly understand not having learnt any of the common universal languages, up until the point the prison ship was raided by a collective of pirates only working together for equal cuts of the profits (the Plumbers used a prison ship to transport the Annihilargh while they still thought it to be a threat, what's to say they wouldn't simultaneaously transport prisoners - aka, the fucking point - with some high sought-after McGuffin). The pair would meet Meridi, a galvan with a penchant for mechanics and especially the kind that deceives an observer like - for instance - an android suit.
Meridi isn't here but gist is, she pilots both her own ship and an android resembling a human, and spies a pretty prize of walking talking taydenite. Instead of scoring a deal, she takes into consideration (perhaps with a cold calculation rather than a warm sympathy) the condition of ECD affected crystals and how much effort it would take to actually refine it and deems turning Ido into pocket change isn't worth it. In fact, further taking note of the explosive volatile footwork of crystallokinesis with the additional muscle of a fulmini veteran, actively helping Ido (and Gali by proxy) would potentially turn out more of a profit.
Gali isn't in dire need for hiding, but Ido uses shadow and a human-mouth jaw mask as tools to conceal what price her skin costs, while Meridi attempts to make prosthetics for a species that doesn't have nerves that also takes into account the unstable electrical currents produced by the compression of crystalline motor functions.
A bit of a tangent in a very long not-even-bothering-to-summarize backstory, I want to talk about petrosapien prosthetics, at least ones that can have 'motors' like Ido's arms (not like Chio's leg). With no external muscles to help strap in and extend the remnant of tendons humans have running through limbs, petrosapien exoskeletons do not offer the same interconnectivity and do not have easy ways to extend what had been cut off. Myoelectric limbs again by human standards also do not fit petrosapien nervous systems either, especially since the only nerves they have are in their equivalent of the central nervous system which also interacts with internal organs, the peripheral nervous system of a petrosapien operates with the highly structured yet individually unique non-standardised crystalline formations and compression. What Meridi does however is take material from Ido's crystal to create the joints in a conductive copper rod prosthetic (insulated in rubber to prevent harm to others), where Ido's compression triggers electricity to run down to remotely compress the crystal joints, which compress under the pressures of electricity and send the signal to be compressed again until motility is achieved.
And that is a lot of context :P woops- I either make no backstory or I make this convoluted piece of moving puzzle pieces, the duality of man I suppose :P
#gali#ido#fulmini#petrosapien#ido is hiding the fact she's a petrosapien in the same way tetrax hides the fact he's a petrosapien :P#oc#ben 10 oc#ben 10#fanart#cult#cult mention#the cult details are under the cut but they are mentioned to be ex-cultists in the caption#so it turns out i did end up using something from that mega collection of images#lowkey (highkey actually) i was inspired to give ido a human-mouth mask from that one cover of thunderstruck#thunderstruck guzheng cover by moyun i believe- i do hope it's not like a facial corrective mask and i'm taking that and using it wrong#but moyun covers her face in all videos so forgive me if i'm completely enamoured with the mask design#gotta be honest with you- i made the concept of ido (pirate petrosapien) based on that mask alone#before i had settled on other half of an ex-cult duo#let alone bringing another older actually a pirate character to create another fucking trio#gali as a fulmini uses plural they/them by default but ido with her fulmus/petropian pidgin accidentally single pronouned gali as she/her#gali doesn't mind it she'll just say it's the plural she/her and they'll nod like it makes sense#(anything can make sense when you're one of two people actively speaking a pidgin language out of necessity)#it's not because gali has 'hair' those are the equivalent of exposed nerves (a fun prank to play on your friend *immense pain*)#but those are parts of other's central colonies with their own memory overriden or not#gali mayy or may not have the fulmini equivalent of a dissociative disorder (more osdd than did if anything)#but the functional equivalent in fulmini biology is quite literally caused by having someone else's brain attached to you#more akin to a male anglerfish than childhood neuroplasticity developing coping mechanisms#and introducing excessive compression disorder! a petrosapien chronic illness! yipippie!!!#i know functionally ecd (or this fictional version if humans have their own ecd acronym taken) isn't a problem real people face#but even in a fictional setting i want to be respectful and hopefully it was?
12 notes
·
View notes
Text
gross man fully swore at me (us) (lydia and a friend) bc we weren’t really laughing at his shitass jokes like ok be funny then
#and for the next like three acts/intros people had to stroke his little ego#like girl it was simply not that serious. i chuckled i gave a polite smile at first but then the jokes were truly just. bad#haha fat women haha masking haha this woman i had sex with. grow a pair#abby talks#he said smth abt not looking at him with that fucking face. bro don’t get up in front of an audience if u can’t handle a girl not laughing#at u let alone if i were actively booing more#and like we should’ve killed him to be clear like skinned him alive#and i hope he felt that way when the funny and charming middle aged fat woman got many many more laughs than he did. bc well she was really#funny and didn’t suck ass <3
8 notes
·
View notes
Text
do you ever go do autism crazy for something you can feel it in ur chest. like it’s hard to breathe almost it’s making you gasp for breath and jump around physically. got an adrenaline rush thinking abt Kirigiri.
#GODDDDD. I LOVE HER SM AUTISM WOMAN.#I go insane thinking abt her and her life and how she develops in THH and past it#and how Makoto and her literally bring out the best AND worst in each other#and her narrative parallels w Byakuya. the way they’re so similar that they’re hypocrites for disliking each other#at first and then the way they’re indispensable in that they’re they only other one that Understands why they’re like that#I cannot word my thoughts for her nearly as coherently unfortunately so no paragraphs tonight. I’m just going to start growling like a dog#the way she fucking commands so much respect and control and how strong she is#and the fact that she is constantly reinforcing that strength by shoring up any weakness or vulnerability with terrifying effectiveness#that leaves her invulnerable but completely alone. and for a long time that seemed like a good thing#and she may even believe it is#but you hear the way she talks about her father and you realize she’s HUMAN. she doesn’t want to be an island all the time.#she has emotions just like anyone else and being viewed as though she doesn’t is incredibly alienating and reinforces her isolation#if she really didn’t care she wouldn’t still be mad that her father left her alone. it wouldn’t still pick at her the way it does#it wouldn’t drive her to abandon the entire purpose of her family by revealing herself as the Ultimate Detective in order to get to him#and then there’s Makoto and Byakuya challenging those aspects of her all over again#Byakuya sees the worst of her. he believes what she puts forth as herself and sees that ruthless cold efficiency#and he isn’t wrong to believe those things. as much as she wears a mask it isn’t fake that she has those qualities#but then comes Makoto who doesn’t see through her mask either but chooses to believe she must be human somewhere even if he’s not sure#he continues to trust her with absolutely no reason to and it feeds into her own ruthless efficiency by making him her Guinea out of sorts#but it also means there’s someone on the shoreline of her island. they want to come in. Will she let them?#that island is painful but not more painful than being vulnerable.#hhhh#I’m crazy
8 notes
·
View notes
Text
also, get your fucking flu shot. i am so exhausted at seeing people who firmly believe that there's no such thing as long-term effects from any virus other than covid and get really cavalier or hand-wavey about the flu. after i had the flu around 2018 (signing out of the hospital against medical advice and refusing oxygen because i was broke, firmly convinced i was probably going to die at home gasping for air or of the fever that put me in the ER), i coughed for six months, was very sick for a year, and still have permanent throat damage (and probably lung damage too). i coughed so much i had to temporarily wear incontinence pads because i lost all my pelvic floor tone and had to do pelvic floor therapy to not piss myself. i couldn't draw a full breath for months after the coughing stopped. i had episodes where eating was difficult because the scar tissue in my throat was choking me. I couldn't yell for over a year. i used to walk five to eight miles a day and even a year and a half after the flu could barely make a mile.
i saw multiple doctors during that time period and every single one of them told me that nothing i was experiencing was unusual after a bad flu and it does, in fact, often take multiple years to recover from an especially bad flu. every single one of them told me this was not the *usual* reaction to a flu, but it wasn't *abnormal* either.
get your flu shot.
#this also means i cough a lot and cough extremely violently#so i still get nervous when i cough in public let alone during 2021 or so#since i didnt really leave house during 2020 much#but even when i was masked and scrupulously covering my coughs people would fucking glare at me#like i cant help it leave me alone my throat is a ruined wasteland#covid#coronavirus#covid tw
53 notes
·
View notes
Text
so many of you talk about the cruel adults in your childhood that negatively effected you and caused lifelong insecurity yet you're still perfectly fine with being that mean stranger to any kid that has the misfortune of existing around you and thats just really gross !!!
#like i get kids can be overwhelming for a various amount of reasons but its not going to kill you to treat children with basic human decency#adults can be just as overwhelming or annoying—if not more. yet if you talked to an another adult the same way you do to a kid#then ppl would fucking hate you and not want to be around you because youre not being cool and witty—youre just mean!!!#everyone has experienced the frustration of being a kid being mistreated by an adult. some more than others#rather its ignoring your bodily autonomy (from sa and assault to hugging you when you don't want to be touched to not letting you#make your own harmless choices like a haircut or whatever). everyone has been talked down to or had their opinion treated like its nothing#or that their thoughts or input doesn't matter. everyone has a childhood experience with a mean or judgemental adult#yet over and over ppl are fine just repeating that cycle of abuse and hatred#like youre a young adult and youre still getting treated like shit by older ones. but youre able to have a drink or you graduated or smthn#so now you feel like you earned that right to be judgemental & angry & mean to a group of people that didnt fucking do anything to you#anyways. this is because im sick and had to go to the store to get groceries and meds#so its a 20 minute walk to the nearest store in 108 degrees bc i dont have gas money and then in the store im ofc using a face mask#like im sweaty and feel disgusting and like shit but this kid was SO fucking excited about his spiderman toy and wanted to talk and#his mom said ‘i told you no one wants to hear about that crap leave her alone’ and like?? no fuck off let a kid be happy?? hes not fucking#doing anything wrong?? so we talked and he showed me the little tiy that lights up and asked if i saw the new spiderverse movie#and i told him i havent! so he asked why so i explained i have photosensitivity and what that means and why i cant see it#(‘even though i heard its super cool!’) and HE WAS SO SWEET... like immediately hid the toy because oh! flashing lights can hurt me!#and then immediately said dont worry because he'll tell me about it so its like i saw it instead!#and like. guys imma be honest with you. i stilm got no fucking idea what this movie's plot is.#but you bet your fucking ass i was pretending like i was following along & was going ‘no way!’ ‘so it's a parallel universe...?’ ‘oh wow!’#like yea its unnecessary. i felt oike i was gonna collapse and im still struggling to breathe at home now. but also i been the kid#who just wanted to talk about my interests and no one wanted to or was dismissing it.#i know it's not a end of the world deal but i also know that crushing feeling. you gotta be the kindness you want to see in the world yknow#anyways. be nice to kids or im not going to be nice to you. they're one of the most vulnerable members of our society and deserves kindness
32 notes
·
View notes
Note
how are you feeling today? did you make it through unscathed?
Yeah I definitely didn't 😭 I've been hella congested all day and I definitely have a cough, but it's more bc my throat is bugging me than anything. I don't think I technically have a fever, my temp's just slightly elevated from where it normally is. It's fucking miserable bc I can't breathe through my nose and the damn thing fucking hurts, and I'm kinda uncomfortable and a little achy, but other than that I'm mostly just tired and a little hazy and generally just don't feel great, so I'm not dying like my partner was lmao. But yeah, all this to say that I'm fucking pissed at him and I literally feel like a goddamn plague rat 😭😭
#not snz#i fucking hate it here#I've sneezed a few times but not much#mainly just coughing#super sniffly tho#also i did go hang out with him just so i could bitch at him lmao#also i feel fucking disgusting and i was sad being in my room#like i don't want anyone to perceive me#like i was almost never sick when i was younger and if i was no i wasn't unless it was bad#but times have changed 😔#so no more going out and doing things while being either maybe or definitely sick 😔#thank god honestly but i still don't want people to Know#like don't fucking look at me let me rot in my hole and die alone#but i didn't wanna be alone apparently like i was very sad about the thought for some reason smh#so yeah we literally just hung out in the car#lowered the seats and had blankets and pillows and shit so it was kinda chill#and he bought food from a couple different places bc it's his fucking fault and he's trying to buy my forgiveness lmao#various soups and mac and cheeses and the general concensus was that they'd probably be good if we could taste them better 😭#some of them tho the texture was just not it like even a great taste couldn't save them imo#also there's a boba place that makes hot teas also so we went there a few times#ordered in advance masks on obviously so we were only in there for like a minute just to grab everything#like we were being as careful as we could#also he's like mostly feeling better like his fever broke apparently#he still sounds fucking gross tho lmao like his voice is shot and he still has a pretty bad cough#and now I'm like fucking whatever we both have the same gross ass fucking disease so it's fine i guess#but i still kept glaring at him as a first reaction whenever he decided to be symptomatic lmao#but i wasn't pressing myself against the window trying to escape so progress lmaoooo#anyway it was a chill day i guess like we were just hanging and making sure the other person wasn't dying lmao#I'm at home now and took a hot ass shower and my eyes hurt and I'm tired so it's probably bedtime lmao
6 notes
·
View notes
Text
/vent post
if anyone has nice words, my job is making me come in tomorrow when i’m 90% sure i have covid
to stare at a screen for eight hours
in a room of fluorescent lights
i’m not upset nooooooo
#i’m literally in so much pain#i have been crying for hours#i cant take pto cause i have plans in December i’d rather kill than cancel#and i cant take unpaid time off cause i still have pto#and my work did away with covid time off#and my laptop doesn’t have a charger#only a docking station#and my supervisor#is so fuckikg stingy about letting me work from home#so i gotta go in#wearing two masks#so fucking uncomfortable#literally making me cry just thinking about it#vent post btw#i’m so miserable and alone rn#pyre rambles
10 notes
·
View notes
Text
genuinely so angry and scared im shaking. how many other times this week this month this year have i been exposed without knowing it. do people even tell each other anymore. it’s just so grim. it’s so fucking grim
#purrs#delete later#covid19#i am fighting for my fucking life every day to stay safe and to keep the people around me some of whom are disabled / chronically ill /#immunocompromised / medically vulnerable safe. i am fucking fighting for my life. it’s already hard that i am usually one of two people in#any given room still wearing a mask let alone an n95 mask. hard and bad enough that we get looks for wearing masks and people think im crazy#for my life still being on hold and for my family still basically never going anywhere. ITS FUCKING WORSE that we are still very much in the#throes of all of it and we are in constant physical and quite frankly EXISTENTIAL danger not only of getting sick / becoming (more)#disabled / literally fucking dying but also returning to the absolute hell of lockdown which while important was psychologically damaging in#ways that are difficult to even articulate. like not only have we as a society decided to not give a shit about unpacking all of that and#healing from the trauma and assuming everyone went through the same thing when we very much did not and to just send everybody back to#school and work because 🤑🤑🤑🤑🤑capitalism🤑🤑🤑🤑🤑 but we have ALSO decided to pretend like the freakish unceasing danger just doesn’t exist#anymore and to get rid of every tool we had available to keep us safe or at minimum make people have to pay exorbitant amounts of money to#access them because 🤑🤑🤑🤑🤑capitalism🤑🤑🤑🤑🤑 !!!!!!! im TIRED. im so fucking tired of it. i am so fucking exhausted and angry and scared. and i#HAVE the luxury and privilege of being able to afford n95 masks and covid tests and to be able to work a job that i can do remotely if i#need to and to not be disabled or immunocompromised. what makes me fucking furious is we decided to throw all the people who don’t have#that access or privilege under the fucking bus and forget about them lol. but what do you expect from a country rotten to its core the way#it is lol. im fucking despondent. why are we living in an incinerator.#* the lockdown(s) werent just important they were necessary. and arguably we should have another one even though if we do i genuinely fear#for my mental health both during and afterwards and quite frankly before. im tired. i am grateful for the life i live which has resulted in#part from the different things that have happened because of the pandemic but i also so desperately wish this never happened and every day I#think about what life would be like if it hadn’t happened. the grief of it all is unspeakably big.
13 notes
·
View notes
Text
need to get the fuck!!!!!!! off !!!!! my phone!!!!!!!
#god is not in ur phone#but all the nice queer people are#constantly torn between “this is enjoyable” and “there's other things that are also enjoyable maybe i should be doing those instead”#and where's the line yk??? and ik being isolated isn't helping either cause where am i going to talk to people???????#when so little places are wheelchair accessible let alone covid conscious enough for me to risk it#even the fucking hospitals don't require masks anymore even though like over a thousand americans are dying from covid every week :/#y'all fucking suck lol i'm so fucking tired of being in isolation but if i get any more disabled i won't be able to do anything!! at all!!!#fuck man#screen time is weird and complicated and hard
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
this is a post to tell you to start harassing your local city council to pass a ceasefire resolution
show up at meetings in numbers sign up to speak, play a video,send emails whatever you can do
if they don’t listen shut it down disrupt that shit
#my city council is full of a bunch of cowards that refused to listen to their constituents so we disrupted and they ran scared#now they’re holding an emergency meeting to change the rules of council meeting trying to silence us but we’re showing up we’re not letting#it go ceasfire fucking now#make sure you’re safe in case the zios show up don’t go anywhere alone wear face masks#free palestine
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
Honestly I'm being a very brave little guy right now and deserve praise for that
#sad shit in the tags#my grandpa died today#so with the grief is the preparation for family obligations to come#and of course now my cat is pissing pink from an UTI so I have to run around getting the prescription filled#and I called out yesterday and today and will have to use bereavement for a couple days next week to help my mom with my grandma#and I'll get the time because my supervisor is awesome but also my company at large is a shit show and whenever i get back it'll suck#I've barely got the energy to mask let alone deal with all of this#but i will because i always do#it just fucking sucks. it all sucks#thank god for my boys and my friends without them I'd fully be in hell
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
This post is great, genuinely. People should want to mask for the sole purpose of protecting elderly, disabled, and immunocompromised people.
But it leaves out a very important reason which unfortunately matters more to most people I think, and that is: YOU are vulnerable to covid. Even if you don’t die, long covid is common, it’s miserable, and there are no approved treatments for it. Even if you don’t get long covid symptoms, there is almost certainly some form of long-term damage to your organs you just haven’t noticed.
If you enjoy being able to do things (or need to be able to do things to survive under the capitalist system we live in), if you enjoy not being in constant pain, hell, even if you just like not getting sick as often: wear a respirator in public.
Unpopular opinion: we should all wear masks as much as possible. Forever.
Immuno compromised people were in danger long before 2019. How many people could we have saved, just by masking?
Seriously. Disabled people deserve to live without fear.
We never know if we're carrying a disease or not, since most symptoms only show up after we're contagious.
Very useful in a world with cameras everywhere.
Even if your masking is not perfect, it is still better than nothing. Every step, even the smallest ones, is another layer of protection for immuno compromised people.
Wouldn't it feel good to save a life by doing something so simple?
Thank you and goodnight!
Edit: this is about all mask preventable disease, not just covid.
#in the 2014-2015 and 2017-2018 flu seasons#51k people died from the flu in the US. both years.#and I imagine very few people even heard about it let alone cared#I think most Americans didn’t know about masking to prevent the spread of disease then though#not really sure how we lost that knowledge after 1918#disability#disabled#chronic illness#chronically ill#disability justice#covid#covid 19#pandemic#covid conscious#still coviding#covid isn’t over#wear a mask#wear a fucking mask#wear a respirator
10K notes
·
View notes
Text
whining hours . sry
#like idk i try to like. imagine a future where i have like. friends. you know. Bare mimimum i have People i talk to. who arent lamp. and i#just cant imagine it happening again#like. i genuinely feel like i cant connect to ppl anymore and idk how id like. i dont see a way for me to do that ever again since i cant g#to school and like. sny job im able to get wouldnt be the kind where i like. meet people or make friends. and last year when i eent out wit#the express purpose of Making friends i literally couldnt. speak to anyone. like i just sat alone with my headphones on until it was time t#go home ... i dont know how to like. initiate casual conversation#+ like. i worry i get way too invested in any potential friendships bc i want so badly to be Normal and have friends and then i freak out#rly badly over something trivial. and thats entirely my fault like I need to work on not letting my freakouts effect the person im freaking#out abt. yk. like its my stupid brain that just gets rly rly overly defensive and weird abt everything its not like. I need to work on that#and thats another reason i dont knowif ill ever be able to make friends again is bc i genuinely dont trust myself not to get overly attache#way too quickly and then explode or something. idk#i also think maybe im just not meant to have actual lasting relationships with anybody ever. yk. like maybe im not meant to ever have roots#and maybe i just wont ever get to have stability and my life will always be entirely transient. Perhaps thats for the best so that i dont#have t like. lose ppl. and ppl dont have to deal with me#+ if i make bad decisions there r less ppl to care abt it. you know. which is a plus. idk#theres like. some parts of me r like desperate for friends and for love and to just . feel like i exist and Talk to people and like. have#stability. and then the rest r like No this is good bc we cant hurt as many ppl like this and also we dont deserve any of that so this is#for the best. and i just have to sit here like ok ! bc if i seek out friendships that part shuts it all down and if i dont the other part#makes me feel miserable and lonely. like damn i am destined for misery. but whatever. it doesnt rly matter DHRNFJFN im just being whiny#it just feels like i need like. ok this is my abdicating responsibility and is the reason i dont have friends disclaimer. i know that. very#aware. but i like. i need somebody to be the one to reach out to Me bc i like. i cant reach out to ppl like. i cant Try to initiate#conversations . but i think if there was a person who like. initiated conversations w me and started a friendship with me i like. i think#itd help me get used to Having a friend again and then id like. id be better at maintaining it and eventually id be able to pick up th#weight. but Obviously nobody wants to like. put in all that effort for somebody whos incapable of returning the favor possibly ever. yk#i need to just bite the bullet and humiliate myself and reach out even if its embarassing and even if it makes me have to throw up#<- happened one time when i tried to talk to someone new. which is so. oh my god. there r ppl who have avtual fucking issues and then im#just like boohoo i tried to think abt a conversation starter and got so anxious i fucking threw up. GOD. i hateit i hate it i hate it. but#wtvr. ik i cant actually expect that from anybody basically like. ik its a stupid wish. idk. i just wish i had somebody who could help me#like. remember how to mask and how to socialize Like a real person. and wouldnt mind that im like. weird right now. and would be willing to#talk to me until i got normal and stuff. wtvr. idk ... 10000 lashings
1 note
·
View note
Text
drives me up a wall living in a very very red district, like “no democrat is ever going to win any local election, let alone a real leftist” district, like “our school board members ran on who was the most anti-mask” red, like “I pass white supremacist signs on the way to buy weed” red
and being in the local leftist community and the guy who runs the anarchist book club and the lady who helps keep the warming shelters open and the people who marched on city hall when a local business was getting death threats for having a drag show are all members of a discord and we get on this discord and have frank discussions about how best to vote
the people who do the protests and the mutual aid and all the real work
going “okay, they’re both fascists, but this one lacks ambition and seems happy to just glide in the position” or “they both suck, but this one can be reasoned with if you frame it patriotically enough” like we don’t even have a democrat to vote for. we know what a vote is. we know what we hope accomplish with it. we know what it can do, and we know what it can’t.
and going from those discussions to here where people think that your vote is some kind of fucking??? enabling maneuver??? as if someone isn’t going to end up in that seat regardless of what you do???
we didn’t build this system, we just live in it. we’re just trying to survive. a vote isn’t a statement of your values, it’s not an endorsement, it’s not a marriage contract, it’s a strategic play you make to keep alive.
the biggest mistake I see leftists making is overestimating their own popularity. “well but everyone would be leftist if they just-“ no, stop, 1) you can’t possibly know that 2) everyone will not just
38K notes
·
View notes