#Lauren McNeil

[popentertainment-concertphotos]

Knuckle Puck – Baltimore Soundstage – Baltimore, MD – December 7, 2023

Photos by Lauren McNeil © 2023. All rights reserved.

[batfleckgifs]

CHASING AMY • 2021

[egotistival]

" i'm not like you. i just can't ... move on."

"no?" the question was voice with an upper inflection in her voice purposefully to make it seem like she was doing what the other said she was; moving on. in reality, there was a dull ache in the center of her chest that she couldn't ignore when she looked at those doe eyes. so she tried not to look. there was a cigarette in her left hand that she ashed before taking a drag, facing away from willow and looking at the traffic down in the city below. her apartment was on the upper floors and she still got dizzy when she looked down sometimes; a feeling that she held onto now. "look at me," she blew out the smoke from the side of her mouth, and tried to catch the eyes of her guest. "it'll pass; it always does." @obsesionadas

[ninadaily]

arielle :

" our wedding #FriendZoneToEndZone

📸 : @christinamcneil"

[vilnmelling]

The Matthews-Goldstein-Lipschitz-McNeils

While I make some more alignment charts, voilà, here's my rendition of the Jon Matteson family tree!

Gary and Paul are brothers, and they have an older sister who my sister and I definitely didn't name after Jon himself. There's quite a big age difference between the siblings, with twelve years between Joan and Paul (Gary's somewhere undecided between there).

I've seen many people headcanon Gary as Richie and Trevor's dad, but I just canNOT see that man raising children. Plus, the surnames don't match up. Speaking of surnames, though, Gary changed his on his own accord, purely for his lawyer brand. "Gary Matthews" just didn't have the right ring to it.

Joan has three sons: Trevor, Richard ("Richie") and Daniel. Trevor and Richie are twins (Trevor is eleven minutes older, I don't make the rules). Paul used to be saddled with babysitting the trio, and as a result, he's very close with his nephews, even now that they don't need babysitting anymore. He's especially close with Richie. BONUS: Trevor is the reason Paul had to see Godspell at the rec center. Trev was in it, and he also thought it was awful (in a fun way).

Since Black Friday tells us two of Linda's sons aren't Gerald's, and Lauren has confirmed that Linda and Gary have had at least one affair, we put two and two together and now Gary's the biological father of Trent and Seaton. (Seaton was picked at random, and Trent being Gary's child was just obvious). Whether or not Gary knows this is up to interpretation. It's possible Linda's the only one who knows.

Wallace McNeil and Boy Jerry are brothers and the cousins of Joan, Gary and Paul. Wallace got the f*ck out of Hatchetfield the moment he had the possibility to. Girl Jeri converted Boy Jerry into such deep Christianity, but then he took it further than she ever had.

Due to Lauren confirming Linda and Gary's affair/s (whether it was a joke or not, I take that as canon now), Roman Murray and the Monroe family aren't a part of this family in any official, legitimate way (*cough* looking at you, Gary and his illegitimate children *cough*).

For reasons I hope are obvious, Wiggly isn't included either.

Now just imagine the family gatherings. Summer barbecues, where Trevor takes every opportunity to reference the Barbecue Monologues. Christmas celebrations that Boy Jerry is specifically asked not to show up to. He shows up anyway — even the time they didn't tell him at whose house they were celebrating. Birthday parties where no one has any idea what to buy the birthday person. What does Paul get Trevor the theater kid? What would Boy Jerry get Richie the anime nerd? What does anyone get Paul the Normal Man?

[wanlittlehusk]

ok actual favorite reads of the year list

i'm very into you by mackenzie wark and kathy acker

mercury retrograde by emily segal

bear by marian engel

sex goblin by lauren cook

mona by pola oloixarac

unlicensed: bootlegging as creative practice by ben schwartz

the quick and the dead by joy williams

moby-dick by hermy

i used to be charming by eve babitz

someone who isn't me by geoff rickly

please kill me by gillian mccain and legs mcneil

this young monster by charlie fox

tentacle by rita indiana

stories in the worst way by garielle lutz

narrow rooms by james purdy

[voices-of-hope-county]

Are there, by chance, voice files of the female deputy actually speaking, or a name of the voice actor who recorded the sound effects?

The female Deputy never speaks, but it sounds to me like she has the same voice actor as one of the cultists. You can find a transcript of most of her lines in this document if you search for “CULT_FOLLOWER_FEMALE_05”. One of the Angels might be played by the same person too.

I know Randy Yuen did motion capture for the Deputy in general, and maybe the male Deputy has his voice, but there is no information about who played “CULT_FOLLOWER_FEMALE_05” and the female Deputy…

The actor’s name must be in the credits, however, so probably one of these people:

VOICE TALENT Doug Abrahams Marty Adams Claire Armstrong Ted Atherton Kailea Banka Carolina Bartczak Lawrence Bayne Bruce Blain Jesse Bond Sarah Booth Marc-André Boulanger Wyatt Bowen Paul Braunstein Kimberly D. Brooks Jason Bryden Nicki Burke Mark Camacho Braeden Clarke Lucinda Davis Stacey DePass Bruce Edwards Jake Epstein Jonathan Goad Amber Goldfarb Alain Goulem Rob Greenway Gavin Hammon Ian Hanlin Lauren Jackson Julianne Jain Mara Junot Helen King Jameson Kraemer Gabe Kunda Tristan D. Lalla Erica Lindbeck Erin Mathews James Mathis III Jon McLaren Scott McNeil Cynthia Kaye McWilliams Chimwemwe Miller Julie Nathanson Mayko Nguyen Peter Outerbridge Lindsay Owen-Pierre Giles Panton Christopher Parson Kristen Peace Murry Peeters Simon Lee Phillips Geoffrey Pounsett Claire Rankin David Richmond-Peck Cara Ricketts Kyle Rideout Charlotte Rogers Paula Shaw Jesse Sherman Ivan Sherry Howard Siegel Jonathan Silver Dylan Taylor Jeff Teravainen Brett Watson Jane Wheeler Dan White Scott Whyte Debra Wilson Kim Yarbrough Farid Yazdani

And there is a little more information about who played who on IMDb.

This is all I know for the moment... but I hope it helps :)

[couldpolyamorysavethem]

BANKY EDWARDS and HOLDEN MCNEIL from CHASING AMY

Justification:

"Genuinely part of the main plot of the movie. Ends with a threesome offer that Lauren Adams, Holden's girlfriend, rejects and was mostly intended to make Banky feel more comfortable with both Holden's relationship and Banky's own repressed attraction to his best friend. Holden & Banky have a genuine attachment and multiple scenes of intentional romantic tension that monoamory and homophobia prevent from boiling over. Kevin Smith writes a lot of very close male best friends, which makes the love between Banky and Holden much more noticeable by comparison. If Chasing Amy would have ended with a throuple, Banky & Holden would have been happy and catty and satisfied until the end of time." - @caninegoodnight

[broadcastarchive-umd]

#PBS "To Be Young, Gifted and Black," depicting the life and works of playwright Lorraine Hansberry, aired on "NET Playhouse" in 1972 and repeated the following year. The cast comprised Ruby Dee, Al Freeman Jr., Roy Scheider, Lauren Jones (above), Claudia McNeil, Barbara Barrie, and Blythe Danner.

Weaving together excerpts from the playwright's diaries, letters, and portions of her work, this TV adaptation of the Off-Broadway play includes many scenes shot on location in the South and on the streets of Harlem. The program was released on VHS in 1998, but a remastered DVD never happened.

[popentertainment-concertphotos]

Story of the Year – Rams Head Live! – Baltimore, MD – January 16, 2024

Photos by Lauren McNeil © 2023

[real-odark]

sorry my ancient relic pepsi bottle was cursed ANYWAYS what do u think of chasing amy

insightful thank u. unc 💜

i think it definitely couldve been worse but DEFINITELY couldve been better

like its at a mid point for me that there were some pretty good things (joey lauren adams' performance [actually just alyssa herself i love her], hooper x, matt damon cameo, gay kiss!) but there were a lot of. bad things that made me cringe throughout the whole movie (holdens views on lgbtq at the start and him falling out of understanding and redemption era 😭, holden mcneil just as a whole, holden mcneil goatee, holden mcneil, the ending......bro used her likeness and name without ??? consent??? like she straight did NOT know about this and also its probably crazy looking to average readers lawl...also banky and holden falling out im gonna tear at the walls? those are two pathetic assholes meant for each other)

not my favorite of askewniverse so far but not my least favorite either lawl

overall just so many things i think couldve been done . DIFFERENTLY? to make it better but honestly i just really like kevin smith 90s humor-heavy so seeing this one get all serious (and by "serious" i mean them handling actual conflicts and big topics of conversation like identity.....and also "serious" being holden whining like a little bitch boy.....i still want him though) was like a Change Alright and just made me kind of mad to see some of it portrayed the way it was

(and/or RECIEVED by characters like you know who im going to say already. holden mcneil)

wish they knew the word bisexual and wish they knew maturing and growing up exists ok #savealyssajones2024 thank you anon

[lboogie1906]

The Negro Ensemble Company was founded in New York City, under the direction of actor Robert Hooks, actor, playwright, and director Douglas Turner Ward, and producer, and director Gerald Krone. NEC was criticized for its integrated administration (Krone was white), its grant from the Ford Foundation, its location in Greenwich Village, and its first season’s bill.

The genesis of the NEC can be traced to 1965 with the production of two one-act plays by Douglas Turner Ward, Happy Ending and Day of Absence, both satires.

The success of the plays prompted the New York Times to ask Ward to write an article on the Afro-Americans in the theatre titled “American Theatre: For Whites Only?” In the article published on August 14, 1966, Ward stressed the need for an established Black theatre by African American playwrights with an unfettered, imaginative Negro angle of vision. He targeted Blacks as the primary audience, but he wanted to attract an informed white audience that shared common experiences to readily understand, and debate the playwrights’ explorations. Ward’s Times article attracted the attention of W. McNeil Lowrey at the Ford Foundation which asked him to apply for a grant for such a theatre. The Ford Foundation awarded Ward a $434,000 grant to establish the NEC. Teaming with Robert Hooks, who brought to the NEC his three-year-old Group Theater Workshop, they made the St. Marks’ Playhouse, the permanent home of NEC since it had been the site of Ward’s successful playwriting debut. A defined policy established the company as a Black-oriented, Black-controlled theatre of high professional standards with an extensive training program in all facets of theatre, from acting to backstage crafts.

The NEC launched or boosted the careers of numerous African American actors including Moses Gunn, Francis Foster, Adolph Caesar, Denise Nicholas, Roxie Roker, Esther Rolle, Rosalind Cash, David Downing, Judyann Elder, Arthur French, Hattie Winston, Clarice Taylor, Allie Woods, and Ron O’Neal. Others who performed with NEC included Stephanie Mills, Cleavon Little, Richard Roundtree, Lauren Jones, and Roscoe Lee Browne. #africanhistory365 #africanexcellence

[favevoiceactorbracket]

Meet the Competing Voice Actors!

After the preliminaries and days of deliberating, here are you VOICE ACTORS COMPETING! One will take home the spot of Tumblr's Favorite Voice Actor!

A note before they are introduced! If you would like to support any of them send in an ask or make propaganda, any propaganda you make and post yourself should have me tagged! As well using the tags #favevabracket or #favevabracket2023!

And a quick reminder about the two rules that will be staying active!

No harrassment, hate, or vitriol will be tolerated. We are here to celebrate the work of voice actors not tear each other down

This is all for fun! Do not take it super seriously!

Good luck to all of our competitors!

Kirby Morrow

Rob Paulsen

Robbie Daymond

Tiana Camacho

Alex Hirsch

Khoi Dao

Megumi Ogata

Ray Chase

Sungwon Cho

tara strong

Yuri Lowenthal

Alejandro Saab

Billy Kametz

Billy West

bryce papenbrook

Cree Summer

Grey DeLisle-Griffin

Kevin Conroy

Phil Lamar

Zach Aguilar

Zeno Robinson

AJ Michalka

Alex Brightman

Allegra Clark

Ashley Johnson

Christopher R. Sabat

Daws Butler

Eartha Kitt

Erika Harlacher-Stone

Frank Welker

J. Michael Tatum

Jack De Sena

Jason Griffith

JK Simmons

John DiMaggio

June Foray

Kristen Schaal

Mark Hamill

Richard Horvitz

Steve Blum

Tom Kenny

Wendie Malick

Aaron Dismuke

Aaron Paul

Aimee Carrero

Alison Brie

Ami Koshimizu

Angela Bassett

Ashley Ball

ashly burch

Avi Roque

Ayumu Murase

Ben Schwartz, baby!

BETH MAY

bill farmer

Bill Scott

brandon rogers

Caitlin Glass

Casey Kasem

Cassandra Lee Morris

Cecil Baldwin

Christine Cavanaugh

Clark Duke

Colleen Clinkenbeard

Daman Mills

Dan Castellaneta

Dan Provenmire

Dani Chambers

Dante Basco

Dave Fennoy

David Tennant

Deedee Magno Hall

Deven Mack

Doris Grau

Doug Boyd

Dylan Marron

Elizabeth Maxwell

EG Daily

Elijah Wood

Ellen McLain

Eric Vale

Erin Fitzgerald

Josey Montana McCoy

Greg Chun

Gu Jiangshan

Guilherme Briggs (brazilian)

Haley Tju

Harry Shearer

Haruka tomatsu

Helen Gould

Hynden Walch

Jack McBrayer

Jackson Publick

Jaime Lynn Marchi

Jason Griffith

Jason Liebrecht

jason marsden

Jennifer Hale

Jerry Jewell

Jim Cummings

Jim Ward

John Burgmeier

John Swasey

Johnny Yong Bosch

Julie Kavner

Justin Cook

Kaiji Tang

Katey Sagal

Kdin Jenzen

Keith David

Ken Sansom

Kent William

Kevin Brighting

Kevin R Free

Kieran Reagan

Kimberly Brooks

Kimiko glenn

Kyle Igneczi

Kyle McCarley

Laura Bailey

Lauren Tom

Leah Clark

Liam O’Brien

Lorenzo Music

Lucien Dodge

Lucille Bliss

Lydia Mackay

Lydia Nicholas

Maddie Blaustein

Mae Questel

Mae Whitman

Maggie Robertson

Mara Wilson

Mark Oliver

Matthew Mercer

Matthew Zahnzinger

Maurice LaMarche

Max Mittelman

Mel Blanc

Melissa Hutchinson

Michael Adamthwaite

Micheal Sinterniklaas

Mike Judge

Monical rial

Natsuki Hanae

Nicole Tompkins

Olivia Olson

Olivia Wilde

P.M. Seymour

Parker Simmons

Patricia Ja Lee

Patrick Pedraza

Paul Castro Jr

Paul Frees

Penny Parker

Pete Gustin ( i think thats how it's spelled)

Peter Cullen

Phil Harris

Phil Hartman

Ricco Fajardo

Roger Craig Smith

Roz Ryan

Sandra Oh

Sarah Miller-Crews

Sayaka Ohara

Scatman Crothers

Scott Adsit

Scott Mcneil

Stanley Tucci

Stephanie Beatriz

Stephen Merchant

Steve Whitmore

Tabitha st Germain

Takaya Kuroda

Tom Kane

Tress McNeil

Veronica Taylor

Vincent Tong

Will Arnett

Yasuo Yamada

Zach Callison

Bobbie Moyinhan

Josh Brener

Andrew Francis

Brent Millar

Sebastian Todd

Kestin Howard

Lizzy Hofe

Andy Cowley

Todd Haberkorn

Yoshimasa Hosoya

Russi Taylor

[egotistival]

making no move to defend her staring, or to apologize for it, lauren stayed put for a moment and let willow continue. a sort of odd grin comes to her face then at the absurdity of the moment - them agreeing on their mutual attraction for one another. it reminded lauren of an odd business meeting, the awkward tension, but that's where the similarities ended. her expression softened somewhat, and she could appreciate the fact that willow seemed to care for her feelings on the matter. she knows now that willow hasn't had good luck with men in the past, makes a note to keep that at the forefront of her mind throughout their future interactions too. she doesn't want to step on any of willow's feelings. "have you ever been with a woman?" she asks, curious and attentive to how her hand reaches for willow's own, cupping around it and shaking, but not too firmly. lauren moves around her, dropping her hand and moving towards the couch in the middle of the room. "would you like to sit with me?"

so like her to overlook the weight of her own words and how they might make other people feel. too much of an introspective thinker to imagine that, ' hey, willow. other people are sad and depressed too ! ' opens her mouth to respond to the clarification, only to close her mouth when lauren continues. " oh. okay . . . " so she does want to sleep with her ? or at the very least isn't put off by the idea. doesn't know why it resolves some of the inner turmoil she's going through. willow's just not accustomed to the idea of others not wanting her physically, sexually. " i guess that makes sense. you were staring at my tits back at the club. " and the lack of subtly made willow blush. it makes her blush now. " i don't not want to sleep with you, by the way. you're really pretty and probably super good at sex things. " what is it that her boss always says ? the quiet ones are the freakiest. " i just don't want to give off a gay for pay vibe. " because willow doesn't know if she actually likes women, or just really appreciates the feminine form. what if she likes them sexually and not romantically ? no. that'd make her just as bad as the men she internally complains about. " that's really nice of you. there's not many people . . . guys who'd do that. " the distinction would be appreciated by lauren, she thinks. hopes so, anyways. it really is difficult to discern what is wanted and what isn't. " they're total scumbags. even the rich ones. " especially the rich ones. offers a smile and eager nod, hand extending to shake lauren's. " friends. "

[theimpossiblescheme]

the storyteller trio - playlists for celia, urania, and nasira for @bombawife‘s OC week (album art by @thedragonchilde)

01. alice alone - joby talbot | 02. spark of creation - nikki renée daniels | 03. down the hole - molly gordon, colton ryan, wesley taylor, z infante, nkeki obi-melekwe, heath saunders, catherine ricafort, andrew kober, grace mclean, and noah galvin | 04. on the steps of the palace - denée benton | 05. someone to say - haley bennett | 06. snöfall - a cerulean state | 07. the whole of the moon - fiona apple | 08. moving - kate bush | 09. u - kylie mcneil | 10. the weekly volcano press - sutton foster, maureen mcgovern, jenny powers, danny gurwin, john hickok, amy mcalexander, robert stattel, and janet carroll | 11. impromptu op. 5 no. 5 - jean sibelius | 12. follow the light - pomplamoose | 13. stop - shoba narayan | 14. the maiden and the selkie - heather dale | 15. rêverie - duved’s transatlantic five x tatiana eva-marie | 16. what is a youth - joanna wang | 17. i am my own invention - darren ritchie and janet dacal | 18. op. 66a, th. 234 - II. pas d'action: rose adagio - petyr tchaikovsky | 19. fly me to the moon - the macarons project [listen]

01. magic to do - patina miller and the players | 02. takk… - sigur rós | 03. new constellations - ryn weaver | 04. fairytale - sara bareilles | 05. the projectionist - sleeping at last | 06. zephyrus - the oh hellos | 07. set el habayib - fayza ahmed | 08. parachutes - hans zimmer and richard harvey | 09. whenever i call you friend - kenny loggins and stevie nicks | 10. the life of the party - zoe jensen | 11. digital ripples - ludvig forssell | 12. rainbow veins - owl city | 13. moon river - audrey hepburn | 14. sky woman - anachnid | 15. platonic love song #1 - lauren bird | 16. dear moon - jehwi | 17. the lost words blessing - seckou keita, bethany porter, kerry andrew, jim molyneux, karine polwart, rachel newton, kris drever, and julie fowlis | 18. i’m going to go back there someday - dave goelz | 19. 14.3 Billion Years - andrew prahlow [listen]

01. milk cassette x.mp3 - analog_mannequin | 02. turnaround - camille and hans zimmer | 03. who am i - harolyn blackwell | 04. stay gold - first aid kit | 05. bookstore girl - charlie burg | 06. the wind is changing - howard harper-barnes | 07. take me home, country roads (whisper of the heart) - chelle | 08. trying something again (again) - lullatone | 09. snowflake - kate bush | 10. oh, what a world - kacey musgraves | 11. keep breathing - shoba narayan | 12. rainbow - dodie | 13. the romantic - lauryn marie | 14. quiet resource - evelyn stein | 15. helwa el hayah - carizma feat. bmd | 16. halfway - audrey brisson-jutras | 17. snow in venice - elizaveta | 18. pocketful of sunshine - natasha bedingfield | 19. rise up - andra day [listen]

[andrewmoocow]

Steven Universe Snake Eyes chapter 7: Gods and Monsters (originally published on October 9, 2023)

AN: And so, we enter the biggest bomb I've ever dropped in one of my stories since I revealed that Haruko Haruhara was saved from her destroyed home planet by Rick Sanchez and eventually betrayed him for Atomsk before meeting Dipper and Mabel Pines. The origins of the Gem race has been one of the biggest mysteries in all of Steven Universe with tons of fans giving their own ideas on it, even as far back as the first season. I've pondered that too sometimes, but there are some parts of the series that are best left to the imagination. Well, until now that is! In this version of Steven's universe, the story of Gemkind shall finally be revealed for all to see, and you all have front row seats to a glimpse at a whole universe's worth of backstory and quite possibly the biggest threat Steven will face yet.

Synopsis: Steven and company meet the creator of all Gemkind and learn of an evil far greater than Black Rutile.

Cast:

Zach Callison as Steven

Estelle as Garnet

Michaela Dietz as Amethyst

Deedee Magno-Hall as Pearl

Aurelio Voltaire as King Cobralan Serpentes

Shirley Millner as Queen Constricta Serpentes

Neil Flynn as Aescul

Henry Rollins as Captain Boa

Jennifer Paz as Lapis

Shelby Rabara as Peridot

Uzo Aduba as Bismuth

Kimberly Brooks as Jasper

Lauren Ash as White Topaz

Grace Rolek as Connie

Tom Scharpling as Greg

Patti LuPone as Yellow Diamond

Lisa Hannigan as Blue Diamond

Christine Ebersole as White Diamond/Gem

Sarah Stiles as Spinel

Peter Cullen as Titanium

Frank Welker as Tungsten

David Kaye as Steel

Corey Burton as Chromium

Bumper Robinson as Gold

Scott McNeil as Iron

Jeffrey Combs as Mercury

Hailee Steinfeld as Zinc

Jason Marsden as Prince Nosiop Jormagundr

Noël Wells as Black Rutile

Keith David as Pyth

Matthew Moy as Lars

Zach Steel as Ronaldo

Atticus Shaffer as Peedee

Cissy Jones as Princess Naja Jormagundr

Enuka Okuma as Rhodonite

Kathleen Fisher as Fluorite

Erica Luttrell as Padparadscha Sapphire

Ashly Burch as Rutile Twins

Jeff Bennett as Murinus/The Sheriff

Featuring Samantha Newark as The Lapidarist

And Joel Grey as King Serpentes I

---

The date, 420,000 years ago. The place, the prehistoric planet that would someday become Serpentes, the capital of the Slytherophidian empire. Before it would become the mighty metropolis that thrived on forcing species from across the universe to compete, Serpentes was a small scattering of snake people colonies dotting the planet's countryside, all under the shaky rule of one monarch, its namesake king Serpentes the First. Serpentes typically spent time away from his subjects on expeditions to explore the planet and learn its history, as he proclaimed himself a scholar. But there was one discovery that would change not just the history of his home planet but the entire universe as well.

"Found anything yet, sire?" a Slytherophidian dressed as a cowboy asked while spitting into a bucket. "We've been out here for weeks and still haven't found any ancient ruins and all that! Might I suggest we quit the tomb raider business, cut back on searching uncharted lands and temples of doom, and go home already?"

"No, Murinus, there has to be something we're missing. I know it!" Serpentes muttered to himself while examining the map in his hands. "We just need to keep looking!"

"Look, Your Highness, I can totally get your eagerness to explore, but I'm happy with just kicking back and letting you do all the work." Murinus said before turning his tail into feet and kicking them on a rock. "Hey, do you see a light somewhere over there?"

"A light? Where?!" Serpentes excitedly replied while gazing out into the horizon. "By Jove, I think you're right! We must go there immediately!" To the king's delight, he could see a faint beam of light ejecting from an ancient temple hidden in the distance. "Come along, Murinus!"

"Me and my big mouth," Murinus said to himself as his king dragged him along toward the temple as the beam got even brighter the closer they got. Upon arriving at the temple, the beam of light was at its absolute brightest, and Serpentes couldn't be more excited.

"Hm, I must say, this would make a nice castle to live in." Serpentes mused as the duo entered the temple, which was filled with crystals and rocks jutting out of the walls and the ceiling. But the most peculiar inhabitant was a large, crystalline being gently clutching a bubble housing a strange gemstone. "And who might you be?"

"Almost there, my child. Almost there." The being whispered to her bubble before she turned to discover Serpentes and Murinus in front of her. "More snakes? You shouldn't be here."

"Do not worry, giant woman. We come in peace." Serpentes calmed the being down. "My name is Serpentes, the king of the Slytherophidians. And this is my companion, Murinus. Say hi, Murinus."

"Howdy." Murinus tipped his hat to the giant woman. "Say, what's that you got in there, madame?"

"Oh, this?" the giant said, presenting the gemstone inside her bubble to the two Slytherophidians. "I've been working on it for the past couple of eons. I call it Gem. It is an advanced lifeform that possesses extraordinary powers unseen by mortals, but I'm not sure how I can test it to make sure it won't harm anybody with how powerful it is."

"Then, why don't I help you take care of it?" King Serpentes offered his assistance. "Maybe I can set up a way for it to grow and control its powers so that everyone can watch and see how strong it is."

"That is a wonderful idea, Serpentes." The giant agreed with the king and shook his hand, sealing the deal.

"By the way, I don't think I ever got your name," Serpentes said.

"My name?" the giant replied. "My name has been lost to time, but you may call me the Lapidarist."

--

In the present day, Steven and the Crystal Gems were being taken through the Jormagundrs' castle towards a hidden doorway by the royal guards, all having no idea what to expect when King Cobralan said it was time for them to learn the truth. As the trip grew longer, the group was soon joined by different sets of guards escorting Greg & Connie and the Diamonds.

"So, uh, what are we doing?" Greg asked nervously. "I was going to cheer you up after your big fight with Black Rutile, but then suddenly, these guys told me they had something I needed to see."

"Do they have a birthday surprise planned for Steven?" Peridot added just as curious.

"I don't know." Yellow Diamond answered. "But whatever it is, I don't think we'll ever be the same after today."

"You are indeed correct, Yellow Diamond," Aescul said as he led the group through the dark corridors hidden within the castle walls to a mysterious chamber that closely resembles the Crystal Temple back on Earth. "Everyone, I'd like you to meet your maker. Hee, I always wanted to say that."

"Wait, our maker? As in the creator of all Gemkind?!" Pearl squawked in shock as the Gems and humans bore witness to a massive, crystalline being kneeling before them, its face utterly blank except for a large diamond on it and wild, spiky hair not unlike White Diamond's.

"Hello, my children." The giant said. "I am the Lapidarist. I am the creator of all Gems."

"Dude, this is so sick!" Amethyst yelled in amazement. "We're face to face with our actual god here!"

"Correction, she is our god as well." Titanium declared as he and the other Metals emerged from the shadows of the chamber to meet their sister race. "So the rumors were true. Our creator still lives."

"Hello there, Miss Lapidarist." Steven greeted the Lapidarist. "My name's Steven Universe. Uh, do you like being called Miss, or do you prefer any other pronouns?"

"On the contrary, my friend, my species has evolved past the need for what you call genders." The Lapidarist explained. "But Miss Lapidarist does have a nice ring to it."

"So, this is the mother of all Gems?" Spinel wondered while scratching her head and sitting on Yellow's shoulder. "How come we never knew about this?"

"Hello there, Lapidarist." White Diamond said sourly as she glared at the creator of the Gem race. "Fancy seeing you again after millions of years."

"Ah, Gem. What a surprise." The Lapidarist greeted White with an inquisitive tilt of her head. "What is it you're calling yourself these days, White Diamond? Not sure if I like the name."

"Okay, enough with the introductions, everybody!" Mercury complained. "Now then, big lady, the snake people said they were going to give us answers, and by your name or whatever, we're gonna get some answers!"

"Actually, we prefer to be called Slytherophidians, Mr. Mercury." Captain Boa corrected the curmudgeonly Metal medic. "The Lapidarist has been the royal family's best-kept secret for generations, all the way back to our first king Serpentes I."

"We've been watching your race for a few years now because the Lapidarist wanted to see if Steven truly meant well in making the radical changes he did to Gem society." King Cobralan added.

"Well, I sure did, no matter what certain emotionally stunted terrorists may say," Steven said assuredly, unaware that Black Rutile, Nosiop, and Pyth were watching from afar.

"Hmph, yeah, right." Black Rutile said glumly while the three villains kept themselves hidden. "Just wait until I use the Lapidarist's powers to wipe you out for good."

"So Miss Lapidarist, earlier you called White Diamond by the name Gem," Garnet said. "We'd like to learn more about that; thank you."

"That was the name I was given when the Lapidarist created me," White said, rolling her eyes as she cringed at the thought like a human would when remembering their awkward teenage years. "And a name I've abandoned for eons."

"Well, allow me to enlighten you." The Lapidarist said while altering the entire room like a holodeck to present the Crystal Gems with White Diamond's hidden past.

--

In the beginning, there was only one. A single black infinitude, so cold and dark for so very long that even the burning light was imperceptible. But then the infinitude found release, and at last, the darkness broke, filling it with shining stars. From these stars came the Lapidarists, who filled this newly born universe with life. On that day, the universe as we knew it was born. Cells, molecules, atoms, from ions to pions, muons to gluons, neutrinos, gravitinos, these were the first planets to be forged by this race of builders, with life blossoming on each one. Life, a precious gift persevering in the face of every obstacle, but it would soon come under attack.

Where there was light to create the first sentient beings, there was a being of pure darkness and evil that sought to extinguish it. A terrible snake-like creature of frightening power known as Squamata devoured planet after planet, millions of voices suddenly crying out in terror before they were just as suddenly silenced. The Lapidarists tried all they could to stop this threat from becoming more powerful. They created many races like the Magmen, the Metals, the Slytherophidians, and the races of the first Universal Lords to combat it. While they successfully sealed Squamata away beneath the future planet of Serpentes, it came at the cost of the entire Lapidarist race being wiped out except for one. Declaring itself the guardian of the monster's resting place, the last Lapidarist isolated itself from the rest of the universe in a hidden temple where it spent millenniums forging the being that would eventually save the universe from their ancient foe. But all of that changed one fateful day.

--

"Ladies and gentlemen, presenting the first-ever challenger of the Contest of Champions, Gem!" King Serpentes announced as he revealed the Lapidarist's creation to the other Slytherophidians. Gem was a tall, pale-skinned female humanoid with copious amounts of mascara applied and dressed as a warrior, but her most distinguishing feature was a gemstone attached to her forehead. "I had found this creature one day years ago on an expedition to the wilderness of our planet and brought her home with me. That was when I got the idea to have her compete against species from other worlds to see who is truly the strongest in the universe. Now then, release her competition!"

The gates opened, and out came a green, hulking humanoid with massive muscles wearing only purple pants that let out a booming roar. Gem just smirked and pulled a spear from her gem that she used to fight the monster.

"What an astounding display of strength, ladies and gentlemen!" King Serpentes exclaimed as Gem duked it out with the ogre-like beast, showing great tenacity and grace compared to the monster serving as her opponent. "Perhaps if more were to come, we would make this into an annual event where champions from far and wide could come and display their powers, like the Grendel we captured, for example!"

"Just a little bit more, you disgusting Grendel!" Gem exclaimed eagerly as she began stabbing at the monster with her spear, causing it to leak pink blood to the cheers of her adoring fans. "Yes, you all love me!"

"And what a shocker, everyone!" Serpentes exclaimed as Gem finished off the Grendel. "Gem has slain the creature! She is truly an amazing warrior!"

"Oh, thank you, thank you all!" Gem accepted the riotous applause as she reunited with King Serpentes outside the arena. "Oh, Your Majesty, I had so much fun today!"

"Perfect, Gem. And you'll be having more fun for years to come." Serpentes said as the two walked away to the temple from whence she came, which was now having a new castle built over it.

"Um, Mr. Serpentes, if I may ask a question," Gem asked her king. "Have you ever thought about letting me explore the planet like you do? Maybe even the whole galaxy, the universe even? I bet there are infinite possibilities for me to explore out there!"

"Now, now, Gem, don't get too excited." Serpentes calmed Gem down. "I admire your enthusiasm, but your one true purpose is here, right at my side and fighting in the Contest of Champions."

"But I just want to explore like you do!" Gem urged her father figure, now sounding an awful lot like a certain pink diamond. "Why can't you let me?!"

"I understand, my dear, but the universe is a vast and dangerous place filled with millions of species that could no doubt either kill you or steal you for themselves," Serpentes explained. "Please understand that this is why you are forbidden from ever leaving Serpentes. Now, I'm off to speak with the construction workers, so you behave yourself, young lady."

Although Gem understood why Serpentes was so protective of her, she felt utterly sheltered in the world she called home. However, while the king did say Gem was forbidden from ever leaving the planet, she assumed he didn't mean more than one of her.

--

"Wow, White was just like Pink when she was created?" Steven realized as his eyes were opened to White Diamond's past while giving the three Diamonds a smug smirk.

"Maybe that's why you abused her so much because she reminded you of yourself," Connie added wryly.

"Guess it's true what they say. Some people are more alike than you think." Gold giggled at White's embarrassing memory while the Diamond blushed in shame.

"Don't make that face at me, White; don't deny what you were in the past." The Lapidarist chided her creation. "Do you remember what happened afterward?"

"Do you not?" White asked, her eyes widened in genuine surprise as she tried to dodge the question.

"Ooo-hoo-hoo, this should be juicy!" Steel giggled eagerly as White took a deep breath and came clean.

"Yes, I remember what happened afterward," White admitted. "For hundreds of years, I took advantage of a loophole created by Serpentes and created the first Gems."

--

Using technology stolen from another race that she reverse-engineered herself into what would later be known as Injectors, Gem began using Serpentes's resources to create more beings like her that she would dub Gem. However, this would come at the cost of the planet slowly suffering the effects of these Injectors draining its life energy, causing dozens to die in uncharted parts of the planet. Upon discovering this courtesy of Murinus, Serpentes sought to do something about this crisis.

"Are you sure that Gem could be to blame for all of this?" Murinus said as he and Serpentes marched to the Devil's Palm canyon, named as such for resembling a humanoid hand with a plateau in the center where the palm would be. "At least she ain't running off to explore the universe."

"And that's the problem!" Serpentes exclaimed. "When I said she was forbidden from leaving, this was not what I meant!" Soon, the duo arrived at the Devil's Palm, where they discovered not just one colorful humanoid with a gemstone on her body but dozens upon dozens more of them. "What in the?!"

"SERPENTES!" the new species all cried out in delight at Serpentes's arrival.

"Hey, your Majesty." One of them greeted casually as Serpentes tried moving his way through the sea of humanoids to reach Gem.

"Gem, what is the meaning of this?!" Serpentes yelled angrily at his creation. "Whatever you are doing, you will soon destroy this whole planet! Is this what you wanted, to tear our world apart and then abandon it to find some other planet to terrorize?!"

"No, my lord, this is not what you think!" Gem urged Serpentes. "You forbade me from leaving Serpentes, but you didn't say the same for all these creatures that I call Gems. Nice name, don't you think?"

"Yes, that is a very nice name, but that's not the point, my child." Serpentes said while drawing out a sword from his hip. "I am sorry, but to ensure the safety of our planet, I'm afraid I'll have to shatter you."

"Is that so?" Gem said as she drew her spear with a smirk. "Then come on, enough talk! Have at you!"

"I will do what I must," Serpentes replied as he readied his blade.

"You will try." Gem added before the two went head-to-head in a mini-Contest of Champions. The Gems that Gem created began cheering for their mother figure as the Slytherophidian and the Gem clashed under the scorching afternoon sun, while Murinus saw fit not to get involved in the situation and wait until it got better.

"You can't keep doing this, Gem!" King Serpentes urged his mighty warrior. "This technology you stole from the Metals was designed to harvest resources from planets at the cost of slowly killing them! How did you even find such things?!"

"Steel practically gave them away when the Metals decided they wanted to live in harmony with their colonies instead of committing genocide." Gem revealed while nimbly dodging a sword swipe. "He just happened to dump them all here one day and let me take some for myself."

"I should really tell them to stop using other planets as a garbage dump for their old tech." Serpentes muttered to himself before seeing an opening on Gem and jabbed his sword into her gem, causing a slight crack.

"W-what did you do?" Gem whimpered in fear as her form glitched while Serpentes looked down at his tail in shame at what he had done. "What did you do to me?"

"I'm sorry, my dear." Serpentes apologized while stroking Gem's face. "But I am only doing what is right." With another stab of the snake king's sword, Gem was utterly shattered, her namesake gemstone on her forehead being reduced to four pieces in four very familiar shapes. "Murinus!"

"Yes, my liege?" Murinus asked as he emerged from his hiding spot before being handed the four gem shards. "Oh no, you didn't."

"I want the Lapidarist to find somewhere for these shards and all of these Gems to flourish so they won't cause any more damage to Serpentes." King Serpentes ordered, looking out at all the Gems inhabiting the Devil's Palm Canyon. "I can handle one Gem, but this many would give me a headache."

And so, with help from the Lapidarist, once she was told of what happened, Gem and all of her creations were exiled to an uncharted planet that would one day become the Gem Homeworld. Hundreds of years afterward, the first of Gem's shards would reform into White Diamond, followed by Yellow, Blue, and Pink Diamond over the next couple thousand years, eventually forming the Great Diamond Authority and beginning to conquer a good portion of the universe that the Universal Lords didn't dominate.

Though the Lapidarist was disappointed at what Gem had become, she vowed not to interfere. She had no choice but to watch as the Diamonds wreaked havoc across the universe, conquering and destroying planet after planet as her story was passed down for generations. At the same time, her fallen kinfolk's other creations, such as the Metals and the Magmen, began rising to prominence in the intergalactic community.

--

"And that is the story of the Gem race." The Lapidarist concluded her story, having blown everyone's minds with the history she revealed to the Crystal Gems once hidden from the public eye. "I am truly sorry that I have been the author of all your pain through my creation of the Diamonds."

"We know you didn't mean any harm, Lapidarist," Bismuth said. "You only wanted to create life, but then it went horribly wrong."

"And we've carried it with our family for generations." Queen Constricta said while everyone was still unaware of who was spying on them.

"This is most interesting." Nosiop muttered excitedly. "Perhaps once we gather our army, we can unleash this snake creature and prove to the Slytherophidians that we were meant to be conquerors!"

"Yes, conquerors," Pyth smirked deviously like he had other plans in mind that didn't align with the prince's.

"As I said, I am truly sorry, but I can make a change." The Lapidarist stated while presenting a mechanical, orb-like device. "This is an Accretionator. A powerful device with the ability to create a strong gravitational pull that can draw in various asteroids and cosmic dust to revive an entire planet. Observe." To demonstrate, the Lapidarist created a hologram of a Gem colony that Steven and Connie recognized, the planet that the jungle moon they once visited as Stevonnie orbited. When the Accretionator was inserted into the planet, asteroids and space dust were vacuumed to the planet's surface, making it as good as new, like it was never conquered and colonized. "Impressive, isn't it? So tell me, do you accept this bargain?"

"Uh, we're going to need to discuss this among ourselves first," Peridot said as the Crystal Gems huddled together to discuss the Lapidarist's offer. "You saw what that Accretionator can do, right? Hundreds upon thousands of worlds revived in seconds! Do you realize what this means?!"

"Yeah, but what about afterward?" Lapis asked. "Are we just going back to how things were before Era 3 started? I think I know someone who would love that."

"Yeah, yeah, Black Rutile and all that," Jasper added sarcastically. "If Steven didn't completely break her body and her spirit, she'd accept the deal faster than you can say, 'Pull the lever, White Topaz.'"

"So what should we do?" White Topaz asked while looking back at the Lapidarist, patiently awaiting their answer. "I don't want to keep our literal goddess waiting."

"Well, ladies, your final answer?" Captain Boa spoke up. "No need to keep a lady waiting."

The Crystal Gems broke their huddle and turned to the Lapidarist. "Look, we're flattered by your offer and tempted by the chance to heal those broken worlds." Pearl declared. "But we just can't do it; the price is too high."

"The entire reason why we became who we are today is because we wanted to freely express ourselves," Amethyst added. "We wanted to live our own lives without anyone telling us what to do or how to do it."

"And we don't want to harm others simply because they are different. Everyone should be able to coexist regardless if they are flawed." Garnet stated firmly. "Like the Diamonds, for example. They have done horrible things in the past, but they're working to make a change for the better, no matter how hard it may be. I'm sure we have made ourselves loud and clear."

"How interesting." The Lapidarist said with a tilt of her head. "I thought I could coax you into complying like you did with so many other individuals, but it seems I was wrong. You prefer to make a change in your own way."

"You're right," Steven replied. "Besides, we once met alternate versions of ourselves from another dimension who were like our polar opposites, and they didn't want to make a change either."

"Should you tell them, or should I?" White whispered to the other Diamonds.

"Tell them what?" Iron asked, overhearing the three Gems' conversation.

"I don't think I like where this is going." Zinc said disdainfully as the Diamonds turned to face the Gems.

"Steven my dear, lately there have been rumors going around of a cover-up we've been performing," Yellow stated shakily. "Well, I must say that the rumors are true."

"What rumors?" Tungsten asked curiously.

"There were rumors that we were hiding the fact we did indeed wipe out organic life on a couple or so planets." Blue Diamond declared. "Well, suffice to say, the rumors were true. We exterminated all life on planets that were trying to fight back, and we hid the truth by saying we would never kill organic life. It's a secret we've been hiding for years, but somehow, the Slytherophidians found out and used it to blackmail us into coming along with them!"

The Crystal Gems all gasped in shock at this revelation. While they were aware that the Diamonds had done many horrible things over thousands of years, they were always told that the planets they conquered were primarily uninhabited, so hearing that a few worlds turned into colonies did house intelligent life was quite possibly just as, if not even an even bigger shock than learning of their species' origins. But no one took this harder than Steven.

"Why am I not surprised you'd hide something so horrible from us?" Steven said gloweringly, trying his best not to lose his temper again. "I wanted to give you three a chance, even after all the horrible things you did to me, us, and everyone. But no, you just keep hiding secrets from everyone, just like my mom did when she was alive. And especially a secret this awful. This is why I'm always so uncomfortable around you because I'm worried that any moment, whenever I turn my back, you'll just go back to your old ways and try to kill me. So destroy all my friends if you want, because I will make you pay for it."

"Steven, you don't understand. We never wanted it to be like this!" White exclaimed as Steven quietly stormed off.

"You pressed the Mom button." Amethyst declared. "You shouldn't have done that."

"Steven, wait!" Spinel yelled as she jumped off Yellow's shoulder and ran off after Steven, leaving the Crystal Gems, the Diamonds, the Metals, and the Slytherophidians alone with the Lapidarist.

"You know, my offer is still on the table." The Lapidarist suggested to the Diamonds.

"We appreciate the gesture, but it will take more than just one device to atone for what we've done." Blue politely declined the offer. "Is there anything else you want to tell us?"

"Indeed, there is." The Lapidarist replied. "There is a prophecy that states that on the day of Ragnarok, there will be a mighty warrior who will emerge from the merger of a group of troubled beings to save all reality from Squamata." She then began to chant the prophecy out loud while her body shined every possible color in existence. "Enlightened warriors of clashing kinships come from afar to banish the Eclipse. Only when united in heart and mind, can they stop the worlds from being aligned."

"So definitely a fusion then." Garnet declared after a quick analysis of the prophecy.

"Yeah, but of who?" Greg asked curiously.

"That is for you to find out, my mortal friends." The Lapidarist said while reverting her body to normal. "But in the meantime, I sense a great crisis on the immediate horizon."

--

Elsewhere in the Jormagundrs' castle, Princess Naja was pacing about her room after being locked away by her brother's enforcers for trying to interfere with his plans. "Nosiop can't get away with this." She muttered to herself. "But who can possibly help us in this hour?"

"Hey, anyone in there?" Lars asked as he knocked on the door. "One of the guards told us that somebody got locked up in their room. Can you tell us who you are before we break you out?"

"I'm Princess Naja Jormagundr!" Naja introduced herself to her rescuer. "My brother had me imprisoned here because he's plotting to conquer our race, and he and Black Rutile didn't want me getting in the way! You must tell Steven Universe at once!"

"Don't worry, miss, we got your back!" Ronaldo yelled as he tried breaking down the door by ramming into it. "Agh, my shoulder!"

"Hey, Paddy Sapphire, can you shapeshift us a key hand?" Peedee asked Padparadscha.

"Ooh, Peedee will ask for my help to free the pretty princess!" Padparadscha said before the door opened, revealing Lars, Ronaldo, Peedee, and the Off-Colors on the other side of the door.

"Looks like our princess wasn't in another castle after all," Lars said as he took Naja by the hand and gave her a gentlemanly kiss. "So, what's this about your brother?"

"He wants our race to become conquerors because no one could take him seriously," Naja explained. "He has aligned interests with Black Rutile to further those goals, and I fear they will doom you all."

"Oh dear, not Black Rutile." Fluorite shook her head in disgust. "Nosiop has made the wrong choice. Black Rutile is one of the evilest, cruelest Gems we know."

"Or is she?" Rhodonite wondered. "After her big meltdown to Steven, I'm having second thoughts about Black Rutile."

"Of course, she could also lie to gain people's sympathy." The left Rutile twin suggested.

"That is so like Black Rutile to do that." The right Rutile added.

"So, now, what do we do?" Peedee asked. "Are we just going to wait and see how this goes?"

"Everyone, I have another vision!" Padparadscha exclaimed. "Prince Nosiop Jormagundr is going to make an announcement!"

"Hey, she's right!" Ronaldo gasped before pointing at Nosiop slithering into the stadium. "Look over there!"

--

At the Ouraborium, Nosiop had returned to his family's viewing box, where he sat on his father's throne alongside the other Universal Lords to make his grand speech. "Today, people of Serpentes, shall be the most glorious day our planet has ever seen." Nosiop declared with Black Rutile and Pyth standing on either side of him. "As of today, I shall now take my father's place as your ruler, for he is not fit to be a king or a Universal Lord. Let this be a wake-up call to you Slytherophidians, the Universal Lords, the Gem race, and the ignorant masses across the entire universe! I shall soon arrive with an entire army of loyal Gems at my side to face down an ancient foe my father has hidden from you for so long! We all must answer to the hand of fate, and fate has chosen me to conquer this world!"

As soon as Nosiop finished his speech with an evil laugh, the entire stadium was sent into a frenzy, wondering if their prince was joking or if he intended to conquer Serpentes. The Universal Lords were left shocked at this declaration, but none were as affected by this as Black Rutile, who looked to one side as she began contemplating her role in Nosiop's plans.

And so, Nosiop pulls off step one of his grand plan. Announce what he's doing to the world and make everyone so scared and confused, they'll have no idea what to do with him. Yeah, talk about dropping a lot of bombs in just one chapter, but this isn't the end of it! Next chapter, we'll be in the homestretch with chaos aplenty and a contemplation of where certain characters will end up by the end. It can only get crazier from here, folks.