#Ladylike Magick

[ladylikemagick]

My self-care birthday ritual...

My self-care birthday ritual…

…goddess pampering for an enchanted life…

I have a confession to make, kitten. I am a GIANT birthday fiend!

In fact, I’m quite notorious for not just having a birth-day but also a birth-MONTH! Not just for myself I might add, I love celebrating my nearest and dearest’s special days for as long as I’m allowed.

This year I think I’m more entitled…

[thevioletmoonwitchery]

Herb of the Week; Birch

My apologies for not writing an herb blog for a couple of weeks. Truth be told I was both busy and uninspired. Even this very morning I was racking my brain while I thumbed through my trusty volume of Cunningham’s Encyclopedia of Magical Herbs for an idea. Suddenly it came to me when I heard my cat Nimbus chittering at the birds in the tree outside my window. Why not blog about a tree? So I have decided to dedicate the next few weeks herbal blogs to the topic of trees. Up first is a favorite of mine from my childhood state of New Hampshire, the birch tree

. https://www.growforagecookferment.com/foraging-birch/

Birch contains powerful medicinal properties!

Birch is also known as Lady of the Woods. This tree with its graceful ladylike appearance is feminine. Yet it is surprisingly sacred to the god Thor. Birch is ruled by the planet Venus, and associated with the element of water. Its powers are Protection, Purification and Exorcism.

Some Magickal uses are as follows;

Protects against lightning.

Birch twigs can be used to exorcise spirits by gently striking the afflicted person or animal with one.

Witches brooms are traditionally made of birch

A cradle of birch wood will protect a baby from evil forces.

Tie a red ribbon around the stem of a birch like the Russians did to rid yourself of the evil eye.

Well that concludes this week’s blog. I hope you have enjoyed it. I look forward to writing the next one. As always comments and questions are welcomed. Until next time be well Witches!

Brightest Blessings,

The Violet Moon Witchery

Sources: Cunningham’s Encyclopedia of Magical Herbs by Scott Cunningham, growforagecookferment.com

[tetsuwan-atom]

What kind of Queen are you(4 choices)? 

The General

The General is a warrior woman. Fierce and strong, she leads battles and she is always winning them. Many tried to belittle her because she is a female but she fought until people realised who she really is. People are enchanted everytime she takes her helmet down to reveal her beautiful face. She is seen as a goddess by many especially by the little girls who are told to act more ladylike.

The Priestess

The Priestess is a woman who practice magick. She is known by people not only because she is a great ruler but because she can cure a lot of diseases with her knowledge in plants. She is in love with nature, animals, humans and art. Wiser than most of the old nobles, she has a gold heart and saving hands. The queen isn't always a nice person, if you try to harm the things that she loves she will gladly make you suffer.

The Mother of the Nation

The Mother of the Nation is a woman loved by everybody. She is seen as a symbol of purity, love, feminity and understanding. She is the perfect wife and mother and that's why many women want to be like her. Don't be fooled by that though, she is a true feminist and always fighting not only for women's rights but for everyones. Because of her  kindness people, especially the peasants, are seeing her as a saint.

Tagged By : @xbloodsoakedx​ - Thanks!

Tagging : Anyone who wants to do this!

[adleryoung]

After the Ixies had received their orders and buzzed away, I turned again to Burnside.

"Are you going to tell me who you were working with?" I growled.

"Ain't," she blurted.

"What dainty and ladylike form should I transmogrify you into?" I mused while she glared at me nervously.  "Remember that Floozy prosecutor during my trial?  Oh wait, you weren't there.  She turned up again, selling tainted food to my army just before the battle.  I think her name was Miss Thompson.  She seemed like a femme with some class.  Or how about a marsh bird, like an ibis or a crane?  They move with such care and precision on those spindly legs.  Or why not a frail old lady?  Yes, an old lady with refined and courtly manners.  I can geas you so you'll always have to say 'please' and 'thank you.'  How would you like that?"

"Th-this ain't fun no more," Burnside grumbled uncertainly.  "I don't wanna play.  Yer takin' things too far."

"I'm taking things too far?" I scoffed.  "This is coming from the little beast who thinks murder and cruelty is jolly fun!  I'm taking things too far!  HA!  By Fuma, that's rich coming from you!  Choose your dainty new form, or I'll choose for you."

"DON'T PUT ME IN THE BOX AGAIN!" Burnside screamed as I made my finger sparkle with Gramarye and brought it close to her.

"What are you talking about?" I asked, startled, as she keeled over and lay huddled & sobbing in the grass.

"Ohhhh I ain't been this scared in a long time," she gasped in between sobs.

"Are you serious?"

"Nor this turned-on," she moaned.  "Stop torturin' me, Adler, you durn varmint.  Please."

Something about this didn't seem right, so I backed off.

"I'm going to make some stew," I announced.  "If you co-operate, I'll let you have some.  If you're very good you can even have some more Orgasmic Touch.  If not, well, I hope you have enough gold saved up to buy a complete wardrobe of Old Lady clothes."

I apported a stew pot and got the trees to help me locate ingredients as I slowly assembled a hearty forest stew.

As the stew cooked, I pondered my predicament.  Assuming everything I knew was true, and lowfolk could not work magick, how had the rabbits managed to confine my scrying to these woods?  They were religious and superstitious; could this somehow be used as a spell amplifier?  Did their prayers somehow have this much efficacy?  Did some god other than Fuma rule the lowfolk world?  I had never considered the possibility before now.

Or maybe it was simpler than that.  Maybe the rabbits' prudery and utter hatred of all forms of fun was causing some sort of nullification effect ... no, that was silly.  As was the idea that their vegetarian lifestyle had caused some sort of disruption in the ham-force.  This would only make sense if the Gnostermongers were right, and All was indeed Ham.  But that couldn't be the case - could it?

[vixlenxe]

What kind of Queen are you(4 choices)?

The Dictator

The Dictator (know also as the Evil Queen) is a strong, smart and ruthless woman. The nobles started to call her those names after she took their wealth to give it back to the poor. She often times is called a witch for the way she's dressing but she doesn't care about it anyway, she likes the terrified glances that she is receiving from them. Don't make the queen angry, she is not only a good fighter but full of ideas on how to destroy you.

The General

The General is a warrior woman. Fierce and strong, she leads battles and she is always winning them. Many tried to belittle her because she is a female but she fought until people realised who she really is. People are enchanted everytime she takes her helmet down to reveal her beautiful face. She is seen as a godess by many especially by the little girls who are told to act more ladylike.

The Mother of the Nation

The Mother of the Nation is a woman loved by everybody. She is seen as a symbol of purity, love, feminity and understanding. She is the perfect wife and mother and that's why many women want to be like her. Don't be fooled by that though, she is a true feminist and always fighting not only for women's rights but for everyones. Because of her  kindness people, especially the peasants, are seeing her as a saint.

The Priestess

The Priestess is a woman who practice magick. She is known by people not only because she is a great ruler but because she can cure a lot of diseases with her knowledge in plants. She is in love with nature, animals, humans and art. Wiser than most of the old nobles, she has a gold heart and saving hands. The queen isn't always a nice person, if you try to harm the things that she loves she will gladly make you suffer.

Tagging - @fckin-multi​​, @akumanoken​, @tetsuwan-atom​, @frznkingdom​, @fxtelism​, @graceful-cure-swan​, @wxrk-is-never-dxne​ & whoever wants to do this quiz!

[thehuntress-rose]

Character Name: Rose Whitman

Title/occupation: “America’s Finest Flower”, cousin to the Baron Charmant

Sponsor: Lumière Charmant

Magick Status: Mundus

Accoutrement: Hunting Rifle

Accomplishments: Well read, a great shot, equestrian.

Biography: Rose was always a firecracker. From a young age her American father took her on hunts for game, though it was unbecoming of a Lady. John Whitman let his daughter get away with anything. Being ladylike wasn’t as important to them as it was to her other relatives. Her mother, however, was more strict and wanted Rose to live the aristocratic life she was raised in. She married for love and missed the luxuries her nobility gave her. She tried to shape her daughter into a gentle little woman who could be married off into royalty since she hadn’t.

Rose didn’t want that. She wanted to stay in America and live her life as she pleased. She wasn’t anyone’s property to give away. But she didn’t have a choice in the matter. Her bags were packed and she was shipped off to her cousin’s estate. And her father didn’t say a word against it. 

This is Rose’s second season and she is as bitter as her first. Luckily, no man wanted a fiery woman under his thumb, because she’d be sure to burn them. But this season might be different, what lengths will Rose go to in order to avoid becoming a lovely bit of property?

[sailorportia]

Three Englands and an American

Ficlet Valentine for @cwjhunt

Roses are red Bamboo is for pandas I think you’re a star So here’s some Hamanda!

Fandom: Little Witch Academia Pairing: Hannah England x Amanda O’Neill

approx. 1650 words, rated T

In which Hannah receives some unexpected assistance taking care of her two younger cousins.

One kid? Hannah could handle that just fine. Two kids? Pushing the limits, but still manageable. But three kids?

"Kill me now."

Hannah had been press-ganged by her family into taking care of her younger cousins for an afternoon during their visit to Blytonbury. The girls were pleasant enough to spend time with, but they needed all of her attention. The last person Hannah wanted to see right now was Amanda O'Neill, who happened to be walking toward them.

The girls noticed that their cousin recognized Amanda.

"Who's that, Hannah?" The younger of the two girls, Gabriella tugged at Hannah's sleeve. Like all the Englands, she had auburn hair, tied back in two pigtails, and dressed in clothes as similar to the Luna Nova uniform as she could get—Gabriella couldn't wait to go to the same school as her cousin. The eight year-old was Hannah's favourite of the two, sweet, well-mannered, and shaping up to be a proper witch.

"Is that your girlfriend?" The older of the two girls, Danielle, had learned the previous summer that Hannah was bisexual and brought it up at every available opportunity. The twelve year-old had developed an attitude and was old enough to resent having a babysitter, on whom she took out her frustrations through relentless teasing. Danielle couldn't have been more different from her sister; she had recently shorn her long hair into a rough pixie cut in a gesture of rebellion against her parents, and her current outfit was a pair of artfully ripped jeans and a black t-shirt with a crude slogan plastered across it.

"Absolutely not," Hannah protested. "She's nothing but trouble." Particularly what she did to Hannah. And her feelings. Hannah would never have expected that she would actually look forward to Amanda's attention. Unfortunately, the American's interest in her seemed to be strictly intended to frustrate her.

Amanda spotted the three of them, smirked and made a beeline for them. "Kids already?" she said. "I heard teen pregnancy was on the rise but this is ridiculous."

Hannah rolled her eyes. "They're not mine, jackass. They're my cousins."

"I'm Gabriella England. How do you do?" She held out her hand and Amanda shook it solemnly.

"I'm Amanda O'Neill," the American replied. "Coolest witch at Luna Nova."

Hannah elbowed her other cousin. "Introduce yourself, Danielle."

"Ugh," Danielle scoffed. "My name is so frickin' girly. I hate it."

"Danni, then," Amanda said. She held out her first for the twelve year-old to bump. Danni smiled and obliged.

"What are you doing here, Amanda?" Hannah asked. She hoped that she was in Blytonbury for something important so she'd go on her way and leave her alone.

"I was just killing time looking for something to do," Amanda said. "And look what I found." She laughed. "Three Englands? Is this the War of the Roses or something?"

"That reference almost makes sense, so I'll give it a pass," Hannah said. "Now get the hell out of here."

Gabriella tugged at Hannah's sleeve again. "Hannah, you said a bad word."

"Yeah," Danni said. "And earlier you called Amanda a jackass." Gabriella reprimanded her sister for repeating the word.

"Urk!" Hannah had forgotten to watch her mouth around the two younger girls. Amanda really did bring out the worst in her.

"Wow, Hannah," Amanda said, smirking even more obnoxiously. "Looks like you don't have what it takes to take care of kids."

Hannah put her hands on her hips. "And you do?"

"I'm actually great with kids."

"Yeah, because you are one!"

"As fun is it is to watch your lover's spat," Danni said, "I thought we were going to the park."

"Yeah!" Gabriella said. "You said we were going to see the ducks and go to a café!"

"We are not having a lover's spat!" Hannah blushed.

"Like I'd be having a lover's spat with her!" Amanda said, forcing a laugh.

"Amanda should come with us too!" Gabriella grabbed Amanda's arm.

"Yeah," Danni chimed in. "Amanda seems like way more fun than you." She grabbed Amanda's other arm.

"I've been captured," Amanda said dramatically. "I guess I have no choice."

"No way," Hannah said. "I'm not watching three kids."

"Please?" Gabriella and Danni gave Hannah their best wobbly lip

Hannah considered her options. She didn't need Amanda complicating her task of taking care of her cousins, but on the other hand, Gabriella and Danni rarely agreed on anything, and if she could mollify both at once, that was a win. And if Amanda was as good with kids as she said she was...

"Fine," Hannah sighed. "But you better behave yourself." She pointed at Amanda accusingly.

"Yes, mom."

The group of three became four and made their way to the park. Hannah led the way, holding Gabriella's hand; Danni trailing at Amanda's heels like a puppy. Once at the park, Gabriella went straight to the pond to feed the ducks, and Amanda magicked up a ball for her and Danni to kick around. Hannah noticed that Amanda had intuited Danni's boundless energy and chosen an activity that would tire her out. In theory. Danni ended up climbing a tree to show off to Amanda. While Hannah chased her back down to the ground, Amanda gave Gabriella a piggyback ride. Once the energy was wrung out of the two girls, they lazed around on the grass in front of the lake—Hannah chastised Amanda for her unladylike sitting position.

"I wish Amanda were my cousin," Danni said wistfully. "She's so much cooler than Hannah."

Hannah frowned, but before she could respond, Amanda chimed in. "You have no idea. Hannah's such a bossy-pants."

"I know how bossy she is way better than you," Danni said competitively. "She's always lecturing me on manners 'cause she's the queen of being ladylike."

Amanda scoffed. "Hannah? Ladylike? She challenged me to a duel for pulling a prank on her." She neglected to mention it was the eighth prank that week.

"Whoa!" Danni looked at Hannah with stars in her eyes. "You challenged someone to a duel!?"

"That's nothing," Amanda said. She smirked at Hannah. "Didn't you spit at Chloe after she trash-talked Diana?"

"That was supposed to be a secret!"

"Hannah, spitting is bad," Gabriella said earnestly.

"Well," Hannah scrambled for an appropriate answer. "If someone is being rude, they aren't deserving of a lady's finer manners and should be treated accordingly."

Gabriella considered this, while Danni stared at Hannah incredulously, apparently reassessing her opinion of her cousin.

Their time in the park came to an end and Hannah ushered the others in the direction of the café. As the girls walked (Amanda joking with the girls along the way), Hannah tried to puzzle out Amanda's behaviour. Not only was she actually being helpful, her revelations that Hannah wasn't as stiff as she seemed gave her a huge boost in Danni's books. Was Amanda trying to make things easier on her? Naturally Hannah appreciated the effort, but the thought of Amanda going out of her way for her put butterflies in her stomach.

They got to the café and Amanda took the others' orders. When it came for Hannah's turn, Amanda put a finger on her lips before she could speak.

"I know exactly what you want," Amanda said before walking off mysteriously.

"Ooh!" Gabriella and Danni voiced in unison. Hannah shushed them and herded them off to a table.

Amanda returned with their orders; she handed Hannah a scone and a coffee with a single cream—just how she liked it.

"How'd I do?" Amanda asked cockily.

"H-h-how do you know what I like?" Hannah spluttered.

"I asked Barbara and she said that was your fave." Amanda waved her phone.

"You have Barbara's number?"

Amanda smirked. "Jealous?"

"As if!"

"Damn, I try to impress you and this is what I get?" A crack appeared in Amanda’s suave facade at that slip of the tongue.

Hannah raised an eyebrow. "Since when do you care about impressing anybody?"

"That's the thing," Amanda replied nervously. "You're not anybody; you're nobody!" 

"Hey!" Hannah felt her face grow hot with indignation. And then she processed that, posturing aside, Amanda had admitted to trying to impress her, and her face grew even hotter out of embarrassment.

"Awww, you two are so such a cute couple," Danni said, taking a self-satisfied bite of her donut.

"We are not a couple!" Hannah yelped.

"Amanda, Hannah won't tell us if she has a boyfriend," Gabriella said. "Does she have a boyfriend?"

"Does she have a girlfriend?" Danni asked.

"Not yet," Amanda said, winking at Hannah, who made a strangled noise in response.

Is Amanda flirting with me!? The thought was more than she could bear. Is that what she's been doing all along!? Or is just trying to annoy me? Did she come along with us because she wanted to spend time with me? Impress me?

"Just have your snacks, children," Hannah said in a high-pitched voice. The girls grinned and did as they were told. Even Amanda.

For a while, anyway.

"Admit it," she said, nudging Hannah with her elbow, "you're glad I'm here to help you out."

Hannah couldn't disagree. Amanda had made the afternoon easier on Hannah. She was good with kids after all, and they actually made quite the team. Taking care of kids. Together.

And following that line of thought made Hannah choke on her coffee.

"I had lots of fun with Amanda," Danni said.

"Me too!" Gabriella added.

The hopeful tones in their voices pushed Hannah to make a decision. She ignored her own apprehensions and the jittering of her heartbeats and pushed forward. "I'm in charge of Gabriella and Danni tomorrow too," she said. "I... I would appreciate it if you helped me baby-sit them again."

"It's a date." Amanda smiled so sincerely that Hannah was left speechless.

"I guess I'll be getting Amanda as a cousin after all," Danni said slyly.

"Danni England!"

[shanie-the-toyaddict]

Let me tell you folks a little bit about my social circle.

I, personally, am a pro-choice, liberal, pro-gun reform, pro-immigrant, bisexual woman who has strong pagan leanings and a fondness for magick. My mother believes that inter-racial relationships are icky and an abomination and people need to “keep to their own color’.

My father is homophobic (possibly, haven’t discussed this with him lately) and believes that women are unfit to be president, and basically is super misogynistic and treats my mother like his personal slave.

My extended family (that I really know) is all pro-Trump.

One person I know is not only homophobic and transphobic, but has an annoying tendency to call Barrack Obama “Obama Bin Laden”, and is also Pro-Trump.

Another person I know is the OPPOSITE of a TERF - She believes “you can be a woman without the plumbing, but you can’t be a man WITH the plumbing” I attend a Pentecostal Church that is Pro-Gun, Anti-Gay, and Anti-Choice. Many of the members are Pro-Trump and have spoken out against “The horrible flood of foreigners”. I am trying out a Christian - Based recovery group, that on DAY ONE used that Duck Dynasty asshole as a testimonial as to why they were so great. I have a recently acquired Church Friend who is probably the best of the whole lot, but she currently works for Salvation Army and doesn’t understand why I have a problem with that and I don’t want to explain for fear of scaring her off. Another person I know is absolutely awesome. He doesn’t belong on this list, other than the fact that he is dislikes Becky Lynch’s “The Man” gimmick and feels she should “Be more ladylike, like Lacey Evans” A Final person I know also really does NOT belong on this list, because she is sweet and innocent and pure and really rather naive and every time we have sessions I give her verbal lessons on everything from Religion to History, to Broadway. These are ALL THE PEOPLE IN MY IRL CIRCLE RIGHT NOW. EVERY ONE OF THEM. They are almost all varying degrees of TOXIC and nearly every one of them has opinions, STRONG PROBLEMATIC OPINIONS that I disagree with. When people talk about cutting toxic people from their life, or say stuff like “If you think THIS we can’t be friends” it troubles me. Because honestly, if I eliminated all the people from my life who I didn’t see eye to eye with on things, I WOULD LITERALLY HAVE NOBODY IN MY LIFE. No Friends, No Family, NOBODY. There is only TWO PEOPLE in my lifetime I have eliminated for being problematic. One was an extreme homophobe and transphobe who frequently used slurs and thought all gay people should die. I cut him out for obvious reasons. The other was someone I knew for a very long time, but my relationship for him was the sort that the bad outweighed the good and he was constantly getting me into serious trouble that could endanger my freedom, so I cut him out as well. Other than that, I leave these supposedly toxic people in my life because the good of having them in it outweighs the bad and I need people in my life because I have a crippling fear of loneliness and abandonment. The bottom line here is, from my experience, NOBODY is perfect. If we adhere to cancel culture and insist on eliminating everyone remotely problematic from our lives, we will all wind up with NOTHING.  So yeah, next time you state that someone is problematic and needs to be canceled, just remember. Everyone is some level of problematic at some point in their lives. People change, people grow. People LEARN. STOP FRIGGIN CANCELING PEOPLE DAMMIT.

[ladylikemagick]

Blissed Out Diffuser Blend

Ladylike Magick's Blissed Out Diffuser Blend

Looking to bring a little bliss to your day? Try this little concoction for your pleasure xo

[theladypirate]

Or what about...

"...what."

"The teaching position. You've been accepted! You will go to The Brambleblood Academy, find that wretched welp, kill her, and our Dark Master will rise again. Oh, Evie, I'm so jealous!" Her cohort and occasional friend, Vivica Leach, practically vibrated with enthusiasm, and not very well contained envy. It made her inky skin take on a not unattractive green tint, sharp teeth glinting eerily in the fluorescent lighting. They'd switched to more eco friendly options in most parts of the keep, but the break room was sort of a space in limbo.

Evelyn Vile, who had dutifully put her name into the pile of applicants, with only a cursory, uninterested glance at the assignment, had not been asking Vivica to repeat herself. It was more along the lines of giving the other woman a moment to reconsider her joke.

Because it had to be a joke.

Evelyn Vile was not teacher material. She wasn't fieldwork material. She preferred her laboratory, and the company of her poisons, and the silence of the dead. Or at least the silence of the overworked, which was not difficult to find in her section of the keep.

Vivica sighed dramatically. Vivica did everything dramatically, which was part of her charm. Allegedly. It must work, because Evelyn still hadn't even attempted to lace her perfume with... anything. Not even the tamer stuff.

"Oh Evie," she said as she draped herself across the uncomfortable plastic chair, fluttering her eyelashes at Evelyn. "This whole thing is wasted on you, you won't even enjoy it, you're so serious and dour, it's not fair!"

Evelyn frowned. It didn't look much different than her normal face, except her eyes narrowed slightly. "No, it's not. Also I am not dour. And it's an assignment, not a vacation. Don't lean back in that chair, it's not stable."

Vivica, who was balancing said chair on the back two legs while somehow still managing to look perfectly proper and ladylike, sighed again. Dramatically. "Such a waste," she muttered.

------------------

Miss E. Vile, Professor of Theoretical Dark Magicks and Charms, stared in horrified silence at the mess that used to be her very orderly desk. The student responsible, one Miss Olivia Krane, aka "Olli" aka the most probable candidate on Evelyn's very short list of probable candidates for Chosen One, shifted back and forth where she stood, looking mortified and thoroughly apologetic.

"I'm so sorry Professor Vile, I don't know what went wrong, I wasn't- I didn't- I'll clean it up!" she stammered, while several of her classmates snickered, and one of the two of her closest friends made as if to stand. Evelyn turned her glare on her class, bringing instant silence, and, distantly, in the part of Evelyn's mind that was NOT currently horrified at the state of her desk, a pang of satisfaction.

"Please remain seated Miss Leland. Miss Krane. That particular countercurse should have been covered in last year's material, yet you appear unfamiliar with the incantation. Please, explain yourself."

Olli, who had been doing a fair job at impersonating a tomato, stammered and looked wide eyed at her friend as if to ask for help.

"We never got to that part! The whole last half of the semester was basically a free study hall after Professor Hall... after he passed away." Kenna Leland had been forbidden from standing, but not from speaking. More guts than sense, she had, but Evelyn could appreciate initiative. However there were more pressing matters. Like her desk. And the new, slow, sinking suspicion Evelyn harbored in her heart.

"...Are you telling me. That you've not had anyone teaching this class. For. Nearly. Four. Months." She punctuated each word with a step as she stalked towards her desk, and consequently, Olli, who shrank a little but remained where she was. She visibly steeled herself, and looked Evelyn in the eyes.

"Its a specialty class, they couldn't find a proper substitute. That isn't my- that isn't -our- fault."

Brave. All of them. Idiots, but brave. Only...

Evelyn looked out at her class, and her two potential targets, and her ruined desk, and felt nothing but that same vicious little spark that had led her down the path to working for the Dark Master, He Of Many Pompous Titles And Subpar Work Benefits. It wasn't like they weren't trying, they were here in a school, ostensibly to learn, and the faculty had failed them. They were SO far behind. Four months, and then the summer break, which should have had a project assigned, and then the three weeks it had taken for her paperwork to go through.

Well. That wouldn't do. That wouldn't do AT ALL. Evelyn was not teacher material, not really, but she was assigned to teach, technically, and she would not be thought of as incompetent in her job.

Evelyn looked out at her class. Her class looked back at her, tense and unsure. Evelyn nodded once, to herself, and smiled. It didn't look much different than her normal face, except the edges of her mouth curled just ever so slightly up. It hurt a little.

"...Upon review I have decided to institute mandatory remedial lessons for the entire class, during study hour and on Saturdays until such time as I am confident you have caught up to your peers. Please be seated Miss Krane."

Concept: administrators of YA fantasy boarding school realise that, while the laws of narrative causality that govern their realm ensure that a thematically appropriate villain will inevitably arise to menace the student body, there’s nothing stopping them from preemptively filling the narrative void by simply hiring a suitable candidate to play the role.

[ask-gayharrypottercharacters]

Bellatrix/Narcissa

New cissatrix drabble written by the talented @ordinarylittleme

Narcissa can’t quite pinpoint when she fell in love with Bellatrix.

Perhaps it was when, for the first time, she saw her sister smile. They were four and two, respectively, and it was Narcissa’s birthday. Bellatrix handed her a book, Magick Moste Evile, and told her to “enjoy” with a glint in her eye very unfamiliar to Narcissa. But she took it, smiled, and said thank you in her most ladylike tone, which made her sister burst into laughter and Narcissa thought that she’d love to hear that sound again.

Perhaps it was when Bellatrix turned eleven, and about to go to Hogwarts. She and Andromeda watched enviously as their sister wore black robes and walked into the brick wall, her hands shaking with fear. Narcissa remembers that moment the best, how vulnerable Bellatrix was in that one moment before she walked through to Platform 9 ¾. She thinks that her sister is beautiful, when she decides to let her guard down.

Perhaps it was when Narcissa turned fourteen, and Bellatrix was seventeen, and she wore a blue satin sash to go with her silky, multicolored robes. Cygnus Black had arranged a magnificent party for his eldest daughter, and he was at the head of the table, drinking glass after glass of Firewhiskey. Narcissa sighed, her father never changed sometimes.

Narcissa doesn’t know. But she loves Bellatrix- And her sister loves her back.

[adleryoung]

"I am not interested in any of your shadowy dealings," I sulked.  "It was the Sisterhood that got me into my present predicament."

"Somehow I don't think the Sisterhood is responsible for you being dressed like a sacrificial maiden," Alice scoffed.  "Perhaps there is something you'd like to confess?"

"You looked much cuter as Relda Fauxfox," Mara quipped around a mouthful of ham.

"Huh?" Fifi asked from the doorway.

"By Fuma, there's two of them," Alice observed as she took another bite of her sandwich.

"You do realize you're eating lowfolk ham, right?" I sneered.  "You've got a lot of nerve, barging in here uninvited and abusing my hospitality."

"But you are honor bound to offer hospitality to travelers," Mara pointed out.

"You call this hospitality?" the rat piped up.  "There isn't even any mustard!"

"Aren't you that rat I met in prison?" I asked.  "And are you wearing the Scuti I took from the SALVs' laboratory?"

"My host and I made a little deal with the Marshal," the rat sneered.

"I just know I'm going to regret asking this," I sighed.  "But how did the Queen get pregnant so quickly?"

"It's been several weeks since you left," Alice explained.  "Temporal slippage with all the Gates you used to get here."

"Okay, I'll abbreviate my question to:  How did she get pregnant?"

"A certain gem and a certain Scuti got together with a certain royal ungulate, who got together with a certain skunk for an evening of certain venery," the rat grinned.

I stared at him for several seconds as I intently willed myself not to visualize the scene he was hinting at.  "And what is she pregnant with, exactly?" I finally managed to say.

"Nobody knows for certain yet," Alice explained.  "It would be best if the child is not a skunk, though even in that case it should not matter, since Estmere is not an elf and has no right to the throne.  His heir has no claim."

"Nope, not talking about that any more," I grumbled, shaking my head.  "I am going on the back porch to change clothes.  No peeking!"

"Nice decor," Alice said as she admired the Vulpitanian posters.  "I assume you chose these?  They are very period-appropriate."

"Oh yeah, like, fer sure," Fifi giggled.  "Isn't Young Monocled Patriot just the best?"

"He certainly is," Alice nodded.  "Oh hey," she added, as Gertrude lugged Jack into the Station and laid him on the floor.  "Is that a Scuti Activated Locomobile Vehicle?  May I take a look?"

"Hmm," Alice mused as she inspected Jack.  "This is a very old model, built by Redbough back before the Antglade rebellion.  It has had a lot of unauthorized work done to it .. I think it may have originally been meant to be female.  Its Identify Friend slot has a homemade wooden card shoved in it, with 'George' written along the edge.  Who's George?  And its volume control has been set to maximum.  I can fix that for you, if you'd like.  Uh-oh, its Discombobulator array is damaged.  You'll need to find a replacement.  Hello, what's this?  A magick capacitor for brief excursions into lowfolk territory!  Now that's a handy thing to have!"

"I'm very concerned that the Duchess of Daisies has such a machine, and possibly others like it, in her possession," I declared as I stepped back into the room.

"Fuma's Whiskers!" Gertrude exclaimed.  "You're a male!!  How could one as elfly and handsome as yourself pass so convincingly as a maiden?  You must truly be a master of disguise!"

"Ummm, okay," I said hesitantly.  "Thanks for that compliment, I guess.  But as I was saying, I'm concerned.  Lifelike automata were outlawed throughout the Empire by my grandfather, Adler the Prudent."

"This would have been built long before that edict was passed," Alice pointed out.  "Plus there are numerous loopholes, if the automaton can be made to be easily distinguishable from a real elf.  One can build it without a tail, for example, or give it the form of an imaginary creature like a jackalope."

"I've always wanted to drive one of those things," the rat murmured dreamily.  "Maybe its memory core contains information I could retrieve.  Once we get it operational, let me pilot it, and I think my host may have something of value to tell you."

"Oooh, can I tease it out of him slowly with a knife and a fistful of straight pins?" Burnside squealed excitedly.

"I'm concerned not only about the automaton," I scolded, "but also by your appalling behavior, Attache Burnside!  How could you be so vicious?  Surely you don't carry on like that at home?"

"Whenever I was bad, my lowfolk pappy locked me in a box," Burnside growled sullenly.  "As you can see, it didn't do much to improve my attitude.  I wouldn't suggest you try it.  Confined spaces make me go completely berserk."

"You mean, you weren't berserk in the woods earlier?"

"Nope.  I was having fun."

"How did you know Jack had a Discombobulator?"  I asked, after taking a moment to digest her previous statement.

"I've seen him around Antglade Station a few times, and I knew what he was."

"HEY!  What kind of demons art thou?" the lowfolk maiden suddenly yelled.  "These are not the exquisite torments of the Netherhells!  Art thou going to stand around talking for all eternity?  I should have been violated repeatedly by now!  Breaker of Winds!  Where is thy bed?  Take me thither and do thy savage duty upon me!"

"Hey, back off, buckteeth!" Fifi snapped.  "I like totally had dibs on him before you ever even knew he existed!"

"Bah!  Be not so greedy!  Thou hast lain in his unholy embrace since time began, Frost-Biter!"

"I haven't!  Like not even once!  No way I'm letting you get it before I do!"

"I am his Imperial Court-Appointed Floozy," Thomson interjected.  "Both of you must defer to me."

"Tough luck for all of you," Burnside snarled as she bit into the maiden's leg.  "But I'm the Prince's Diplomatic Attache, and it is my duty to stay closest to him at all times."

"I just need to keep the maiden intact for the Duchess's collection team," Gertrude insisted.  "Careful, there.  Don't make me have to hurt you."

"What are you doing?" Alice asked as Mara raised her fists and slowly approached the scuffle.  "You don't have any stake in this."

"My host body has experienced the Prince's magick touch," Mara explained through clenched teeth.  "Even though I know better .. the craving is .. nigh irresistible .. just to be close to him for a while .. with no distractions .. couldn't hurt .."

This was too much foolishness for me to tolerate.  I lunged across the desk and yanked the hatchet out of the previous Border Agent's skull.  Immediately the air was rent by a loud, piercing, unearthly scream.

"TAKE IT OUTSIDE, LADIES," I yelled.  "Settle the sleeping arrangements however you like, but the hammock is MINE, and mine alone!"

The femmes all rushed out the back door, and I replaced the hatchet.  The night was suddenly still - unsettlingly still.

I peeked out the doorway to see why everyone had gotten so quiet.

Duchess Catherine O'Daisies sashayed up the porch steps, with a large clay jug slung over her shoulder.  Gertrude bowed her head reverently.  Burnside did a ladylike little curtsey and muttered "Your Grace."  The other femmes huddled nervously against the railing at the far edges of the porch.

"Adler, honey," the Duchess sighed musically, "I just heard the news from Albric Tor, and I figured I'd better stop on by.  I brung a jug of Usquebaugh to help us think, cuz you 'n me's got a lotta plannin' to do.  Oh, and in case y'all was wonderin' .. what y'all was tusslin' about a minute ago?  Seein' as Adler's a diplomatic representative, he's gotta be extra neighborly to the Antglade, meanin' the one he snuggles up with at night has gotta be either me, or my duly appointed proxy, lil' ol' Miss Burnside.  Take your pick, Adler honey."