#LIKE HE'S. god he has the patience for so much. and its a very different sort of vibe if you're like. a charming asshole

[dangoulains-devotion]

yuffie has many interesting elements to her but people refuse to move past "i find energetic kids annoying" and it makes me sad

[kismate]

came to the conclusion that kismet can only work so well with people who are assholes before reaching his own personal limit

[norrisainz33]

baby blue || cs55

☆ summary: carlos sainz is married to famous pop star y/n who has been connected to the f1 world for years having been a mercedes ambassador and good friends with lewis hamilton. after a video of y/n and lewis surfaces, y/n shares some big news with the spanish driver.

☆ pairing: carlos sainz x famous!wife!reader x lewis hamilton

☆ fc & warnings: rihanna! a little angsty, mentions of pregnancy, translated spanish

☆ requested: yes! thanks for this idea and for your patience. had to add in some written parts to this to tell the story! hope you enjoy xxoo

masterlist

ﾟ. ✿ ୨❤︎୧⠀✿ . ﾟ

ynuser has made a post

liked by zendaya, tatemcrae, carlossainz55, lando, williamsracing, sabrinacarpenter, dualipa, and 2,435,768 others

ynuser: 📍 bahrain

view all comments

user1: pink is your color

dualipa: real! miss u my sweet gorgeous girl

user33: you just gonna post like we didnt see the video from the paddock

user18: no for realllll like girl be soooo for real

user1: nah nah nah you guys need to but out you know nothing!! they're just friends. we dont need to scrutinize everything they do

tatemcrae: my icon fr

user2: ynlewis supremacy

user8: seems like shes a ynlewis truther herself bsed on that video

user3: lewishamilton come get your girl

user4: more like carlossainz55 come get your girl yikes

[comments on this post have been limited]

✿

staring down at your phone you watched as the video played over and over each replay making your stomach twist a little more. you cursed yourself for not remembering where you were before having your very public breakdown in front of lewis at ferrari hospitality. what was supposed to be a quick visit to tell lewis (one of your closest friends) that red suited him and say a quick hello to alexandra had spiraled into something entirely different. one moment you were complimenting him and the next you were sobbing in his arms. of course, the media caught every second of it and in true fashion they plastered the video everywhere. the rumors started flying almost immediately with the world convinced you and lewis were more than just friends as they have been for years.

but here's how the conversation really went:

"hi lewis!! god that red is doing wonders for you right now," you smiled as you took in the sight of your best friend decked out in ferrari gear.

"thanks, y/n/n. i think so too," he grinned - his confidence and happiness clear.

"you ready to hop in that car and show everyone you’ve still got it grandpa?"

"absolutely. you know better than anyone how much i want to make this work." his voice was full of sincerity and something about the way he said it made your chest tighten and tears started welling up in your eyes.

"oh no, don't cry on me now…" he said his hand gently brushing at your cheek.

you laughed but it was shaky as the tears fully spilled down your face. "sorry, sorry… i just - i'm so excited for you, and i miss danny and checo," you rambled suddenly feeling overwhelmed. he gave you a confused look not exactly sure where all of this was coming form.

"something tells me there's more to this, y/n/n," he said his tone shifting as he took a step closer.

without thinking, you blurted it out. "i’m pregnant."

lewis froze for a split second before pulling you into a tight hug, letting you cry into his shoulder. the kind of cry that left you feeling both raw and relieved at the same time.

"hey, hey— the cameras are loving this," alexandra’s voice suddenly broke through and she frantically pushed both of you toward the ferrari hospitality area her tone full of urgency.

as she led the way you couldn’t help but feel the weight of everything.... the unexpected turn your life had taken and the way the world was watching every moment unfold and it was too late to take it all back now.

✿

ynuser has posted a story

view all story replies

user1: wow a rare carlos sighting on a story.. awk timing after that vid....

carlossainz55: wow posting me? surprised its not lewis.

ynuser: carlos don't start please. you know its not like that

carlossainz55: then why was it lewis holding you while you were crying and not me? and why won’t you even tell me what happened?

ynuser: i did tell you. it’s just been so overwhelming lately especially with the pressure from my label to release new music. on top of that i haven’t been feeling great which makes everything harder. you literally held my hair while i threw up all night. come on carlos please.

carlossainz55: mi amor you know I’ve had a hard time with your relationship with lewis. and now that he’s taken my seat… it just gets harder to see him in ferrari red while comforting my wife. it’s hard not to feel jealous!

ynuser: i’m really sorry carlos. i can’t even imagine how that feels. focus on your last practice session and get the data you need. we can talk properly when you’re back at the hotel ok?

carlossainz55: fine but you’ll explain everything word for word right?

ynuser: of course. now go -- i see on tv that the power’s back on

carlossainz55: yeah yeah ill go. i love you -- even when im upset

ynuser: i love you too. always

user33: damage control?

alexandrasaintmleux: love you pretty girl. please let me know if you need anything both charlie and i are here for you too

ynuser: i love you more alex 🤍 thank you for always supporting me. oh and for noticing the cameras before they got too much

alexandrasaintmleux: thats what friends are for. please please please keep me updated

user10: i just know everyone's tearing u up in these replies so im here to say i love and support you bb

lewishamilton: did you tell him yet?

ynuser: considering you’re both at the same testing... no I haven’t

lewishamilton: oh don't give me that. you could have told him last night!!

ynuser: yeah well i was scared!!

lewishamilton: sweetheart, the faster you rip off the bandaid the faster he (and everyone else) stops getting the complete wrong idea

ynuser: i know i know i know!!!!!! easier said than done here lewis.

lewishamilton: he tried to approach me this morning and i was able to avoid it but if he comes to me and starts asking what is up... i'm not going to lie

ynuser: alright message received. him and i agreed to talk everything out tonight.

lewishamilton: good.

user11: idc abt this man release new music pls im begging its been ages

schecoperez: mi amiga what in the world is going on?

ynuser: too much honestly... i'll call you bc BOY do i have a lot to share and ALSO i miss you SO MUCH

schecoperez: will be impatiently waiting :)

user44: tbh idc abt f1.. id rather see pics of u. free my queen from this nonsense sport!!!!

✿

you flopped back onto the giant hotel bed letting out a big sigh. alex and lily had just left after giving you the pep talk of a lifetime and dropping off the cake. if it wasn't for them and all the effort they’d put into running around bahrain to find someone who could make you this cake, you probably would’ve chickened out of telling carlos altogether. it wasn’t something either of you had planned for yet. you’d only gotten married a few months ago and between carlos switching to a new team and the insane pressure your label had been piling on you, it felt like the wrong time to be having a baby. hence, your breakdown in the paddock with lewis. but like alex and lily said everything happens for a reason and maybe this was just the moment it was meant to happen, no matter how daunting it all felt.

you quickly sat up when you heard carlos fumbling with the door to the hotel room and immediately, tears started to well up. you tried to hold them back but they came rushing down as soon as carlos stepped through the door. his brow furrowed when he saw you crying on the bed.

"mi amor..." he sighed setting his things down on the couch and shrugging off his williams jacket. "what’s going on with you?" he asked gently kneeling in front of you and placing his hands on your bare knees.

you were fully sobbing now desperately wiping away the tears as he watched you in silence. "i just... i..." you tried to speak but the words got tangled up in your sobs making it harder to get them out.

"cariño take a deep breath," he said softly taking your hand in his and giving it a firm squeeze. you obeyed and took slow, deep breaths, trying to calm yourself down. which wasn’t easy these days with all the changes your body was going through. eventually you shook your head not being able to calm yourself enough and pointed toward the box on the table hoping he would understand. carlos’ eyes followed your finger and he stood up walking over to the table. "y/n, what is...?" he stopped mid-sentence struck silent as he stared down at the contents of the box—a small cake with 'we’re having a baby' written on it and a pregnancy test sitting next to it.

you kept focusing on your breathing summoning the courage to look at your husband who stood completely still. in the endless seconds it took for him to react - guilt, panic, and despair began to settle in. "i’m sorry, carlos, i know this is a horrible time. i should’ve told you earlier, we should’ve talked about this first, and i just—i’m sorry this—"

"stop, y/n," he interrupted, his voice thick with emotion. you couldn’t tell if the tears in his eyes were good or bad. but then in the blink of an eye, his face softened and his expression lightened up. "don’t apologize for this, my love." he picked up the test and glanced back at you. "this is real?"

"yes," you whispered.

he dropped the test moving swiftly toward you and pulling you into a tight embrace. "we’re going to have a baby chili," he mumbled into your neck holding you like he never wanted to let go. and with that all of your worries melted away.

✿

ynuser has posted to their private story

view all story replies

lando: what u posting close ups of food for

ynuser: you’ll find out when you’re older

lando: tf that supposed to mean

ynuser: means you can’t keep a secret to save your life

lando: a man accidentally includes a photo from a wedding in 1!!!! photo dump and he can’t ever come back from it

ynuser: exactly

lando: 🤨

lilymhe: THE CAKE HAS BEEN EATEN???

ynuser: it has!!!!!! and everything is ok

lilymhe: i’m so relieved

carlossainz55: the best cake i’ve ever had 🤍

ynuser: i'm really quite glad you think so

carlossainz55: of course gorgeous. i am so excited that we get to be parents

ynuser: i'm so happy that you're happy

carlossainz55: over the moon actually. i already called the florist and local bakery near casa de mi familia to get everything sorted for when we tell them in a couple weeks. i also sent you room service and some special deliveries so if you hear a loud knock on the door this morning, just know its from me

ynuser: carlos 😭😭😭😭

carlossainz55: i also may or may not have already slipped and told teto..........

ynuser: I THOUGHT WE WERE TELLING HIM AND GIGI AT DINNER ONCE YOU OFFICIALLY FINISHED TESTNG

carlosainz55: ....... i mean that was the plan originally but we were cycling this morning and he could tell something was up and well i couldnt lie!! i swore him to secrecy it is ok

ynuser: i'm making my lawyers send him an nda

carlossainz55: LOL

ynuser: i'm serious

carlossainz55: oh... well in that case… whatever makes you feel best my love!!!

alexandrasaintmleux: details mon ange

ynuser: he finally got back after testing and i completely broke down into tears bc of course i did—im a mess with these hormones. he immediately was worried ofc and was like “mi amor, what’s wrong?” but I couldn’t even stop crying long enough to explain. so i just pointed at the cake box instead and then be opened it, stared at it for what felt like an eternity… honestly, it was probably 8 million years and then HE started crying. which just made me cry even more. but honestly after we got everything out it felt like really good. he was beyond excited like already talking about the little one and brainstorming names and looking up where to buy baby clothes in spain and already planning how to tell his family and mine

alexandrasaintmleux: 🥹😭 see!! it was all ok!!! i’m so so so glad he was excited. i knew he would be!! he wanted so badly to be dad

lewishamilton: so?

ynuser: i told him

lewishamilton: thank god!! now i can assume uncle duties without getting my face bashed in

ynuser: you’re so dramatic

yourbff: i’m so happy for you guys 😭

ynuser: thank you sweetheart 😘

dualipa: assuming i’m missing context here

ynuser: i’ll face time you baby girl

carlossainz55 has posted to his story

[sharing the joy with our family ☀️💙]

view all story replies

anasainzvdec: mi hermano i am so excited for you. i can't wait to be an auntie 🤍

carlossainz55: i love you ana! you will be the world's best aunt

user2: PINON!!!!!!

carlossainzoficial: ¡tal vez la mayor alegría que hayas podido compartir con nosotros! [perhaps the greatest joy you could have shared with us!]

carlossainz55: me alegro. no puedo esperar a que seas abuelo, papá. [i am glad. i can't wait for you to be a grandfather, dad]

carlossainzoficial: estoy muy orgulloso del hombre en el que te has convertido y de la vida que has construido con y/n. [i'm so proud of the man you have become and the life you have built with y/n]

carlossainz55: ¡no me hagas llorar papá! [don't make me cry dad]

user4: sharing joy??? with your family..... what does this mean?

lando: google translating this as we speak

lando: and what joy are you sharing and why are you not also sharing it with me?

carlossainz55: i will be on sunday muppet. you are coming to dinner at my house no?

lando: oh heck yeah ill be there

user18: what an interesting wording you have here mr.sainz - what are you talking about?

ynuser: petition to bring pinon with us everywhere

carlossainz55: jajaaj i don't know that she would like that

ynuser: 😭😭😭😭😭 fair ig. tho i think a baby and a puppy would be a perfect pair......

user55: the world is healing youre back with pinon

alexandrasaintmleux: EEEEEEK!!!!!! y/n filled me in on how it went. truly so excited for you. i can't wait for the big dinner party where you're telling all of us 🤍

carlossainz55: i am very much looking forward to this weekend. we'll see you soon mi amiga

carlossainz55 has made a post

liked by lando, willamsracing, alex_albon, ynuser, charlesleclerc, lewishamilton, carlossainzoficial, and 765,102 others

carlossainz55: spent the weekend celebrating the news with some of my favorite people. you are so loved already baby chili. you're mommy, daddy and loads of aunties and uncles can't wait to meet you so very soon 💙🌶️

view all comments

user55: crying my eyes out rn you have no idea

ynuser: thankful for you, our baby boy, and the amazing people we have supporting us 🤍

carlossainz55: even more thankful for you for giving me the greatest gift i could have ever asked for my beautiful wife

user85: may a love like this find me expeditiously

user1: well…. a baby wasn’t on my bingo card

lando: dibs on teaching baby chili how to drive

charlesleclerc: i already called dibs

georgerussell63: no i believe i did

carlossainz55: frankly, i dont trust any of you to teach him

charlesleclerc: WOW

user4: congratulations 😭 i'm seething with jealousy 😭

alex_albon: can't wait to be the favorite uncle

lilymhe: with me as the favorite aunt

alexandrasaintmleux: um hello? i'm going to be the favorite aunt

lando: FALSE I AM THE FAVORITE AUNT

ynuser: guys please lets not fight

user23: carlando having their own pic at the end is sending me. classic carlando behavior

user13: man this vroom vroom got my girl and now they’re having a baby? smh

lewishamilton: congratulations you two! overjoyed to see two of my favorite people becoming parents ❤️

carlossainz55: thank you 💙

user88: tea

user56: so many of the drivers being at their baby shower has me in genuine shambles im not ok this grid baby is going to be so loved

ﾟ. ✿ ୨❤︎୧⠀✿ . ﾟ

a/n: phew this took me forever... hope you enjoy!! likes and reblogs appreciated as always ❤️‍🔥

ﾟ. ✿ ୨❤︎୧⠀✿ . ﾟ

disclaimer: pictures are not mine and everything i write is fiction

© norrisainz33 || please do not rewrite, translate, or copy any of my works posted here on to any other platform

[meanbossart]

Ask compilation: Mommy issues, Hair Stew, spicy blood, and some vague art advice from a guy with no formal art education.

Been a minute since I did one of these!

Thank you all for your messages and for your patience, as always I'm incredibly sorry that I can't reply to all of you!

DU drow saved Arabella in act 1 and obviously helped her out in act 2. He's surprisingly soft on (most*) kids and always has been, even as a Bhaalist (though he did consider them all Murders In The Making back then).

Arabella is no different. He thought her efforts to stop the druid's ritual were comically charming and appreciated how much Arabella seemed to successfully look after herself. They got along really well while she was around, though she probably spent more time with the more "approachable" party members at DU drow's own insistence.

And he is just biased towards less domesticated animals! Dogs are fine but DU drow appreciates cat's knack for self-sufficiency more. Also, they are pretty and elegant creatures - both things he enjoys in animals as well as people.

As for favorite cat, Malta. Easily.

First of all, interesting question!

It's a mixture of both. I draw conclusions from stuff I observed (Astarion's ass grabbing and confidence during sex, The Dark Urge's entire characterization, the obvious oral fixated vampire connection, Orin's barefootness) and more minute stuff that's already based of off personal headcanons I have - but of course, its all pretty limited to things I can personally stomach. I'm not necessarily into the same things they are, but I can get them, if that makes sense.

And thank you so much!

How dare you. He's clearly a Foetus man.

I'm really glad you like her!!! I honestly love that scenario even more than I thought I would and have a lot of plans to draw more of it.

And potentially! I honestly hadn't thought about that, but I think female elves do tend to be a little shorter than the males, so she might shrink down to 5'8, 5'9 or something. Kind of a negligible difference because I would still like for her to be a pretty tall woman.

The epilogue party isn't really a "canon" event to his story, since it wasn't out when i finished the game and - and while very satisfying from a gameplay POV, I don't find it narratively interesting.

BUT his epilogue party would look pretty full save for Halsin, Karlach and Lae'zel. We'd have a God Gale, a Selunite-ish Shadowheart and a Blade of Frontiers Wyll - as well as Spawn Astarion, obviously. I Haven't given it much thought, admittedly! And there isn't much reason to do so since A Novel Experience serves as the Actual epilogue to me.

He puts the blame for Yenna's death wholly on Orin. It's one of those things he avoids reflecting on entirely and Yenna's name will probably never leave his mouth again. Considering he allowed her into camp and personally failed to convince Orin to spare her life at the temple, I think it's a guilt too difficult to circumvent, were he to entertain it.

Because he has a father figure already, which left room to fantasize about an idealized maternal one. It's also his bias towards femme people.

Hello!

Unfortunately I can't give you an easy answer for this one. I have drawn a lot and for a long time, and I've always enjoyed dynamic poses and put a whole lot of effort into capturing motion in a way I'm satisfied with - and often I STILL feel as if certain aspects of my art are stiff!

I think working on being a little "looser" with one's art and playing with lineart weight helps tremendously. Understand things like foreground/background division can also help to give your art dimension, and inevitably that movement you are looking for. Unfortunately, I'm self taught and not very educated on the matter myself 😅 I can do it, but explaining or teaching it is something else entirely.

It dips in his stew 😔

The usual pet names! Darling, Lover, Sweetheart, he's been known to let a "baby boy" slip out. DU drow is more known for the literal name-calling.

.... And neither of them is a "daddy" person, for sure.

He has no idea and he thinks that's pretty damn funny. He likes how his dick looks, and he is kind of glad that he gets to enjoy it without having any memory of how it got to be that way - he's definitely assuming Bizarre Sex Accident, though.

He will eat whatever is available without complaint if he has to for survival, but he does enjoy a nicely prepared dish! From rustic home-cooking to the gourmet dining. He's most definitely fond of onions - as well as meat, fat, and heavy seasoning. I don't know what that means for the way his blood tastes, maybe it makes it specially hearty... Which Astarion might like, based on his Spicy Food comment in act 1.

Either way Astarion does not feed on him after the campaign is over, so that's not something they have to worry about!

He's.... Okay with Minsc. He definitely doesn't take him too seriously but they've had fleeting moments of meat-head-like understanding between the two of them, not that DU drow would ever admit to it. He kind of sees him as Jaheira's beefy pet.

He is profoundly suspicious of Boo.

This ask was a little buried in my inbox, so I hope you have been able to secure work since then! Patreon subscription completely aside.

That's a tough question because there is definitely a degree of luck involved. I'd say find your niche - be that a genre, character, or fandom - and then find the niche within that niche you feel comfortable in and where you can meet people of similar interests, and who might be interested in your art. Don't go in making selling pitches, obviously, actually try to make friends and lift each other up.

At that point, if you're both persistent (-in your craft, NOT in chasing after validation!) you will be able to sell a few commissions or get a few bites on patreon or a similar platform! After that, its a matter of letting your work speak for itself.

This is very simplified of course, and a summary of a process that usually takes many many years to develop unless, once again, you get very lucky. But I do think persistence and passion tends to reward folks who stick with it!

I know some artists use advertisement and reel trends on instagram to get more eyes on their work as well, and I've seen a few get a lot of success from it, but unfortunately I don't know anything about that side of things.

[sy-ki]

𝐒𝐦𝐢𝐥𝐞 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐜𝐚𝐦𝐞𝐫𝐚

word count: 1.4k

tags: caleb x afab fem!reader, smut, implied psuedo incest, creampie, cum eating, panty sniffing, pussy eating through panties (? idk what else to call it), cunnilingus, light nipple play, clit stimulation, light face licking, implied aftercare

note: uhh so this is like my first time ever writing smut, its not even beta read so forgive me for any mistakes, anyways.. it's 2:30am and i should definitely be sleeping so lmk if i missed any tags or anything like that

“Caleb hurry”

“Have some patience pips I'm trying to find the right angle” he says as he sets up the camera to catch you in the bed sitting cross legged, only wearing his old worn out tshirt and panties. Fleet work demands the attention of their colonel and not knowing when exactly he'll be able to wrap it up this is…. "motivation" for the time spent away from each other.

“Alright there” He says, satisfied with how the camera captures all of you and moves back in frame, climbing on the bed he settles in front of you hands on your knees rubbing soothing circles before prying them open, and they are immediately soothing down your thighs “You feel okay?” Caleb asks which in all honesty is very sweet of him, considering you haven't ever done anything like this but right now you can't bring yourself appreciate it, given how his lips were on yours minutes before he got an alert that the Fleet would need him tomorrow morning for a confidential case, so you nod wrapping your arms around his neck hoping he won't notice your disappointment.

But he does.

He always does.

“But you are. I hate that stupid fleet of yours, they always take you away from me” you say, spoiled. Absolutely spoiled by your gege, always needing him by your side, wanting to carve a space open in his chest and fit yourself inside. You had always been like this, it's a lot worse now though, ever since the explosion, thinking you had lost him forever and then finding him again, it has made you more possessive of him and his time, always clinging to him even after how much he changed in your eyes, how different he became from the Caleb you knew and grew up with. His heart sores at the thought.

“Don't be like that baby, you know I'm not leaving because I want to” he tries to soothe you like he has done countless times since you were children, trailing soft pecks from your forehead to your cheeks

He's quick to kiss away the sad little pout on your lips, “I'm here right now yeah?” he tries to reassure and distract you, kissing and nipping at your neck, which seems to do the trick since you were already worked up from earlier, he gently lays you down on your back and lifts your legs over his shoulder, kissing down your calves down to your core, there's impatience in his movement, how he grips the back of your doughy thighs pressing your knees to your chest as he mouths at the seam of your cotton panties, all tongue and teeth as he bites, sucks and licks just a few inches away from where you need him the most.

A choked “Fuck-” is all you manage to say before you throw your head back, hips lifting from his hold as they try to chase the pleasure his mouth gives, but he is faster, stronger it's easy to forget on normal days but when Caleb’s like this, hands pinning your thighs back down— manhandling you it sends a shiver down your spine “You liked that” he say, smug bastard “Shit- just- quit fucking around” you demand, a little frustrated now.

“Calebbb you're teasing again” you whine breathlessly pussy throbbing and gushing “I’m savouring you” he replies pressing his nose right up against your clit through the now slowly soaking panties and he breaths you in “Fuck— god you smell so fucking sweet”. He pays no mind to you squealing and trying to push his head away as he presses his nose deeper, breathing shakily, before you can yell at him he flattens his tongue over your pussy through the fabric.

All it does is make him chuckle “What a spoiled girl, didn't I teach you to ask for the things you want” he chides all too satisfied having you unravel beneath him, it makes you flustered, frustrated, hot like molten lava flushing your face warm, you want to hide from him, bury your face in the pillow but you know better than to do that, so you do what you've always been taught, you ask, nicely politely, “Want you, please” you beg to which he shakes his head “Be specific pips i can't read your mind on how you want me” he says, his thumb pushing under the elastic of your soaked panty as he pulls and snaps it on your skin “Shit- fuck. Okay, want your mouth, please.. gege use your mouth”

He grins before he adjusts you so your soaked cunt is on full display, the camera capturing it, before he licks a stripe up your silt fabric clinging to your puffed up lips, the tip of his tongue presses down where your hole should be then sucks the soaked fabric into his mouth before he pulls back just enough to slide it to the side and latch his mouth onto your clit, sucking and pressing down on it with his tongue, and all you can do is grip his hair and moan, legs wrapping around him, thighs trapping his head in place and Caleb thinks he can die happy here.

It isn't long when the coil in your belly is pulled tight “Caleb im g-gon—” “Go on baby, make a mess” it's all you need before you unravel on his tongue, his tongue fucking into you to taste every last drop, when it gets too overwhelming he gently pulls away with a kiss to your sensetive clit, you pull him up and into a kiss, tasting yourself on his tongue, it's messy, it's filthy, drool dripping down the sides of your mouths when he rubs his tongue against yours, swirling and sucking on it, you don't want to pull away, never, you want to be attached to him in every sense of the word, fused together, but the need for air takes over and your both separate with a filthy swipe of your tongue, Caleb however leans down to lick up the sides of your lips catching drool spilling over.

“Do you feel okay to continue?” Caleb asks to which you eagerly nod, you've been waiting for this the whole evening, moving you both in the middle of the bed, he picks up the camera, kneeling between your legs as you spread them open, the camera catching the wet shine of it, your hands bunch up his your tshirt up to your neck, Caleb can't help himself from pawing at your tits, leaning down to take one in his mouth, swirling his tongue around your nipple and lightly biting it, which earns him moans upon moans from you, popping it out of his mouth, he thumbs at your bottom lip, you take that as an invitation to wrap your pretty lips around it and suck, his cock throbs in his pants, has been leaking pre since he started touching you

You look up at him from under your lashes, still sucking on his fingers as you take his cock out stroking him, it earns you a delicious hiss from him as he slides his thumb out from your mouth, pressing and circling it on your neglected nipple, you gasp pussy gushing as you run his tip on your clit. Up and down, up and down as it catches on the entrance of your hold making both of you shudder, losing composure second by second, Caleb holds himself at the base and taps his cock on your wet cunt, pushing in all in one go.

The stretch leaves both of you breathless, and he sets a punishing pace, seemingly all thoughts and composure leaves him and he hastily sets the camera back down, in a somewhat coherent position so it at least keeps you both in frame, wrapping his hands around your hips he all but buries himself in you with each stroke, the camera shakes as well the recording definitely turning blurry. You wrap yourself around him, clinging and surrounding him as he reaches deep within you, tears of pleasure cling to your eyes as you hide your face in his neck, clenching around him as he momentary stutters his pace and he latches onto your nipple, two-three well angled thrusts and you both are coming undone, ropes and ropes of hot cum spilling inside you as you go limp under him, too boneless to move or ask him to move as he crushes you under his weight.

By the time he's finds the strength to pull away from you, you are floating between the edges of sleepiness It makes something fond bubble inside his chest “It's okay honey, you can rest I'll clean you up” He says kissing your cheek and reaching to switch the recording off, you give him a sweet smile before succumbing to sleep.

[fordiaz]

The Archer (Evan Buckley) ࣪ 🏹°࿐ ࣪ ᳝۰ ◝

“We’ve both been afraid of losing the things that matter. But maybe this time, we don’t have to.” જ⁀➴

Synopsis: Evan Buckley has always feared people leaving — but the 118 never did. When a new paramedic joins the team, Buck is forced to confront the version of himself he’s tried to outrun. Through quiet moments, late-night calls, and unexpected vulnerability, he learns that maybe, just maybe, love doesn’t have to hurt to be real.

Genre: Drama, Hurt/Comfort, Angst, Slow Burn

AU: None

Pairing: Evan Buckley x Afab!Paramedic!Reader

Warnings: Mentions of injuries the usual stuff in 911 episodes, calls and emergencies.

Note: Another fic yet again because these things are literally sitting in my google docs waiting to breathe new life. Thank God for my hyper fixation on this show (I’m still on S6) that I’m putting out fics like a machine. Anyways, if you guys enjoyed don’t forget to like + reblog and leave any comments because they are very much appreciated! Happy reading!

Evan Buckley lived in extremes.

He always had. From the moment he showed up at the 118 — too young, too fast, too much — he’d chased every call like it owed him something. Like if he just ran hard enough, climbed high enough, saved enough, he could outrun the feeling gnawing at his ribs.

He didn’t name it back then.

Didn’t need to.

Because naming it meant slowing down. Meant looking it in the face and admitting that he wasn’t just chasing danger — he was chasing worth.

The job gave him purpose. The team gave him structure. And for a while, that was enough.

Until it wasn’t.

Because when you’re the guy who runs into burning buildings with a smile on your face, people stop asking if you’re the one burning.

He became a legend fast — not in the medals or accolades kind of way, but in whispers around the department.

That’s Buck. He pulled a kid out of a collapsing house. He scaled five stories without ropes once. Total maniac. He hooked up with two EMTs in one weekend.

They weren’t wrong.

Buck didn’t care what people said, as long as they were saying something. Being talked about was better than being forgotten.

And under the bravado, the recklessness, the charm — there was a boy who had been left too many times. By his parents. His sister. Abby. The world.

So he made sure no one could ignore him.

He was the guy who dove headfirst into every call, heart first into every mistake. He was loud. Sloppy, sometimes. He was the kind of brave that bordered on foolish.

Bobby saw it. Hen saw it. Chim tried to buffer him, joke around him, nudge him back into place.

But Buck? Buck was barely holding himself together.

He wasn’t malicious. Just restless. Hungry for connection, for the kind of safety he didn’t believe he deserved. Which is why, when Abby Clarke walked into his life, he latched on with both hands and no helmet.

She was older. Calmer. She saw through the noise and offered him something still. Something quiet.

And he clung to it.

He thought this is it — someone who stays.

Until she didn’t.

And when she left, she didn’t just take her suitcase. She took whatever fragile progress Buck had made believing he was enough for someone to stay for.

He spiraled.

Hard.

Sleeping around. Ghosting shifts. Picking fights with Chim. Pushing Bobby’s patience to its limit. He got suspended. Almost fired. And still, he kept running — from something, toward nothing.

And then he hit a wall.

Not a physical one. But one only he could feel — the kind that comes when the thrill stops numbing the ache.

That’s when Bobby finally sat him down. Really sat him down. No raised voice. No threats. Just a soft, quiet: “Are you done trying to destroy yourself?”

Buck hadn’t answered.

Not that day.

But something shifted.

He started showing up differently. Stayed sober on his days off. Came early. Took care of the new guy, Ravi. Listened more. Talked less. Learned to shut his mouth before the sarcasm slipped out and hurt someone.

It was slow. Uneven. There were backslides.

Nights where he stared at his ceiling wondering if there was anything left for him outside the job. But then came the little wins — Bobby trusting him with a delicate rescue. Hen letting him lead a training. Chim actually saying, “Proud of you, man.”

They were quiet victories.

The kind that didn’t need sirens or spotlights.

And Buck started to realize: maybe being seen didn’t have to mean being loud. Maybe it could mean being real.

And in that stillness, that liminal space between healing and hurt, something — someone — would soon arrive.

But not yet.

Not today.

Today, Buck walked into the firehouse with a steady gait and a thermos of coffee in his hand. He wasn’t running anymore.

He wasn’t fixed. But he was trying.

And as he stepped into the kitchen and spotted Ravi talking to someone new — a face he didn’t recognize yet — he tilted his head, curiosity piqued.

Not because of interest.

But because these days, he paid attention.

Because he knew better than anyone: everyone walks in with a story.

And sometimes, if you’re lucky, you find someone who stays for yours.

The firehouse kitchen smelled like garlic bread and grilled chicken — Bobby’s signature meal for easing new recruits into the fold.

A little comfort food, a lot of subtle observation. It was tradition by now. Buck had seen it play out a dozen times. But tonight, something felt different.

“Alright, everyone,” Bobby called out, wiping his hands on a dish towel.

“We’ve got a new member joining us on rotation. Paramedic. Transferred from Station 136. Came highly recommended — and yes, she’s already survived the paperwork.”

That got a few chuckles.

Buck leaned back in his chair, sipping a beer, eyes fixed on the table — until he heard footsteps and glanced up.

You walked in with quiet confidence, your expression open but unreadable. You gave Chim a nod, bumped fists with Ravi, even managed to coax a small smile out of Eddie. But when your eyes met Buck’s, something sharpened in your gaze.

“Evan Buckley,” you said, stepping forward before Bobby could do the honors. “The man. The myth. The sex swing incident.”

Hen choked on her water.

Buck blinked. “Seriously? That’s still going around?”

“I mean, you got stuck mid-rescue,” you said, grinning. “It’s basically required reading in paramedic group chats.”

“I was saving a guy’s life—”

“While tangled in a very specific apparatus,” Hen added, laughing now. “Classic Buck.”

“Right,” Buck muttered, but he was smiling too as he stood to shake your hand. “Well, glad I could make an impression.”

“Hard not to,” you replied smoothly.

Bobby motioned toward the food. “Grab a plate. Get comfortable. You’re family now.”

You slid into the seat between Buck and Hen — the one always left open for new blood. Buck noticed the ease in your posture, the way you listened when Chim talked about his daughter, how you laughed — really laughed — at one of Ravi’s sarcastic remarks.

You were tuned in. Not trying to dominate the room, just present in a way that made people want to open up.

Hen leaned closer. “So, three years at 136, right?”

“Yup. Two of those mostly on medical calls. Rotated through some tough wildfire seasons last year. Decided I wanted something steadier. A tighter-knit crew.”

Buck tilted his head. “And you think this place is steady?”

You looked at him with a smirk. “Steady’s relative. But I’ve got a good gut.”

Hen raised her glass. “To instincts. You’re gonna fit right in.”

Buck didn’t say much after that. Just observed.

The way you leaned toward Hen when she spoke. The way you passed the salad bowl without anyone asking. The calm energy you brought into the chaos.

And for a guy like Buck — whose life had often felt like a long string of misfires — that calm made him want to stay just a little longer in your orbit.

Later, when you excused yourself to help Bobby in the kitchen, Hen elbowed him. “She’s good.”

“Yeah,” Buck muttered, still watching the doorway you disappeared through. “She really is.”

Something in him stirred — something that hadn’t moved in a long time.

But for now, he kept it buried. One shift at a time.

The sirens wailed as the 118 raced through downtown. Dispatch had flagged it as a ‘multi-casualty trauma,’ and the pit in Buck’s stomach tightened the closer they got.

It was a three-car collision on a bridge, with reports of people trapped, including a child in critical condition. The kind of call that didn’t just test your skills — it tested your nerve.

“Chim, Buck — you’re with me on extractions. Eddie, Y/N, you handle triage,” Bobby directed as the truck rolled to a stop with a hiss of brakes.

Without missing a beat, you grabbed your trauma bag and jumped out of the rig, sprinting alongside Eddie toward the first wrecked vehicle.

Buck watched you go, momentarily caught off guard by the way you moved — focused, fast, in full command of your role.

He didn’t even realize he was smiling until Chim gave him a look. “You gonna stand there or you wanna keep up?”

“Right, yeah,” Buck muttered, snapping into motion.

The scene was chaos. Glass shimmered on the pavement like ice. A woman screamed from one of the cars, her leg pinned beneath the dashboard. A toddler wailed in the backseat. And that was just one of the three vehicles.

Buck was elbow-deep in a door panel when he heard you over the comms.

“Victim 1 has a head wound and possible spinal trauma. Stabilizing now.”

You were crouched beside a man whose forehead was bleeding profusely, calmly applying a C-collar and giving directions to a bystander to help brace him.

It wasn’t just that you knew what to do — it was the way you spoke. Direct, grounding. People listened.

“Y/N, I need a hand over here!” Chim called out from the middle car.

“On it!” You tossed a pair of gloves to the bystander and dashed over.

Buck watched as you assessed a woman’s irregular breathing and slipped a hand behind her neck like you’d done it a thousand times.

You didn’t hesitate. You didn’t rattle. You just moved.

Even Eddie glanced up from where he was wrapping a boy’s arm in gauze and muttered to himself, “Damn. She’s good.”

By the time all victims were stabilized and en route to the hospital, Buck stood near the rig, helmet tucked under his arm, adrenaline buzzing.

You walked over, brushing dust off your sleeves. “You alright?”

“Me? I’m good,” Buck said. “But you—wow. That was incredible. The way you handled the head trauma guy, and that kid who was hyperventilating?”

You shrugged, modest but glowing from the rush. “You do this job long enough, you learn how to find your footing in the chaos.”

Buck stared at you for a second longer than necessary.

“Yeah, but not everyone makes it look that easy.”

Chim joined them, clapping you on the back. “If you keep pulling moves like that, I’m not gonna let Hen take you next shift.”

“Too late,” Eddie said as he came up, peeling off his gloves. “I’m already requesting her.”

You rolled your eyes, but Buck could see the smile tugging at your lips.

Bobby walked over last, clipboard in hand. “Good work, all of you. Y/N, you’re proving to be everything your record said and more.”

“Thanks, Cap,” you said, wiping sweat from your brow.

As the team packed up and got back into the rig, Buck slid into the seat beside you.

“You’re full of surprises,” he said quietly.

You turned to him, brow arched. “Good ones, I hope?”

“The best kind,” he said.

And he meant it.

It was just after sunrise when the 118 pulled back into the station. The adrenaline from the bridge call had faded, replaced by the familiar ache of fatigue and the hum of relief.

The B shift crew was already filtering in — exchanging nods, half-sleepy greetings, and fresh cups of coffee.

Buck scrubbed a hand through his messy curls as he slid off his turnout coat, tossing it into his locker.

You were at the sink in the kitchen, rinsing your hands and scrubbing away the grime of the last twelve hours. Hen passed you a towel and a warm smile as she grabbed her keys.

“You did good today, Y/N,” she said. “For what it’s worth — not many people impress Buck.”

Buck looked up from his locker with a faint scoff. “I’m not that hard to impress.”

“Yes, you are,” Chim and Eddie said in unison as they passed by, drawing a light chuckle from you.

Buck shot them both a look before wandering over to the kitchen. You were drying your hands, your sleeves rolled up, a few strands of hair escaping your bun.

“Hey,” Buck said, leaning a little against the counter. “Shift’s done. You got plans this morning?”

You looked up, curious. “Besides sleeping for five hours and eating my weight in leftover pasta? Not really.”

Buck smiled. “Well… I was thinking coffee. There’s this spot a few blocks down — open early, quiet, and they actually know how to make a flat white. If you’re into that.”

You blinked — surprised, but not unpleasantly. “You offering me caffeine, Buckley?”

“Maybe,” he said, his grin boyish, almost shy.

“Or maybe I’m trying to hang out with the paramedic who saved three people in record time this morning and made Eddie Diaz speechless for a whole twenty seconds.”

You let out a small laugh, reaching for your jacket. “Alright. Coffee sounds good.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah,” you said, slinging your bag over your shoulder. “But you’re buying. Hero tax.”

Buck chuckled, holding the door open for you as you both stepped out into the golden, sleepy haze of early morning.

“Deal.”

From the window, Eddie watched the two of you walk off together, shaking his head with a knowing smile. Hen stepped beside him, coffee in hand.

“Told you he’d crack first,” she said.

Eddie hummed. “Yeah, but for once… it’s not just a flirt.”

Hen sipped her drink. “Let’s just hope he doesn’t mess it up.”

The thing no one told you about being a firefighter wasn’t how loud the job could get.

It was the silence after.

The silence when the sirens faded, and the blood was cleaned from your gloves, and the screams stopped echoing in your ears.

That was when the weight crept in — not just from the job, but from who you carried it for.

You had learned early in life not to hold on too tightly. Nothing ever really stayed — not your childhood house, not the friends you thought were forever, not even the people who promised they wouldn’t leave.

Change had always arrived like a storm: without warning, without apology.

So you adapted.

You moved light. You didn’t ask for permanence. You didn’t get too attached.

But then you found the 118.

And somewhere along the line, they became the one place you didn’t have to flinch.

Buck had started as a ripple.

That first coffee turned into a second, then into breakfast runs, then into small moments: him helping you hose down the rig after a muddy call, saving you the last protein bar in the kitchen, walking just a step behind you on every building search like he was quietly, instinctively keeping watch.

He didn’t make it loud, but Buck had slipped into your life like he’d always been meant to be there.

And that terrified you.

Because lately, your heart had begun to stutter every time you lost sight of him during a call.

You started counting the seconds he was out of your line of vision. Every loud crash, every “man down” over comms, had you holding your breath before you even realized it.

You weren’t used to caring this much. Not about someone who ran headfirst into fire.

And today’s call — it shook something loose.

A scaffolding collapse. Six construction workers trapped. One rebar impalement. Two amputations. The kind of call that would drain anyone.

Buck had gone up to the second floor, clearing debris to reach a trapped victim. You and Hen had stayed on the ground level, assisting with triage. You’d looked up once to check on him, just in time to see the beam snap above him.

He’d dodged it. Barely.

He’d waved it off afterward with that crooked smile of his, sweat matting his curls. But your heart had dropped so fast you didn’t even register you were shaking until Hen quietly placed a steady hand on your back.

You didn’t let it show.

Not then.

But later that night, long after the rig was clean and the paperwork was filed, you found yourself lingering in the kitchen as the others filtered out.

Bobby was wiping down the counter, Hen sipped her tea at the table, and Chim leaned back in his chair scrolling through photos of Jee-Yun.

You didn’t mean to say it aloud.

But you did.

“I’m scared.”

The room stilled — not with judgment, but with familiarity.

Bobby set the towel down. “About what?”

You hesitated, swallowing. “About caring too much. About getting used to something good… and having it taken away.”

Hen tilted her head, gently. “You mean Buck.”

You didn’t answer. You didn’t have to.

Chim set his phone down and leaned forward, more serious now. “Buck has that effect.”

“He’s reckless,” you said softly, voice fraying. “He throws himself into danger without a second thought. He laughs it off and keeps going. I’m just— I’m scared one day he won’t come back.”

“Have you told him?” Bobby asked.

You shook your head. “I don’t want to make it about me.”

Hen stood and crossed the kitchen, resting a warm hand on your shoulder.

“Sweetheart, caring about someone doesn’t make it about you. It makes it real.”

Chim smiled, softer this time. “He probably feels the same way. Buck might be reckless with himself, but he’s not reckless with people he cares about. And trust me — he cares about you.”

You looked up, heart pounding. “You think so?”

“I know so,” Bobby said. “I’ve seen the way he looks at you after every call. Like he’s checking to make sure you made it back.”

Hen nodded. “You don’t have to keep carrying the weight of every fear by yourself. You’ve got us. And you’ve got him — even if neither of you have said it out loud yet.”

The silence returned, but this time it was filled with something warmer. You let out a breath you hadn’t realized you’d been holding.

“Thanks,” you murmured. “I needed that.”

Chim bumped your shoulder with his. “You’re part of this family now. You don’t get to do things the hard way all the time.”

You laughed, finally. “Noted.”

And when Buck walked into the kitchen a few minutes later — face flushed from a hot shower, curls damp, a curious glance cast your way — you didn’t look away.

Maybe things didn’t always stay.

But maybe some people could.

And maybe, just maybe… he was one of them.

It started small.

You used to sit next to Buck on shift, shoulder-to-shoulder at the kitchen table, his leg brushing yours whenever you both leaned in for a bite of something Hen made.

Your jokes came fast and easy. He knew the exact creases in your smile, the way your laugh always started in your chest before reaching your eyes.

But lately?

Lately, you’d been somewhere else entirely.

You’d started riding back with Chim and Eddie after calls, hanging back in the rig longer than usual, sometimes even taking your coffee breaks outside, pretending to answer texts.

When you laughed now, it was still warm — still you — but Buck didn’t feel like the reason anymore.

At first, he told himself it was nothing. Maybe just a bad day. A bad week. Burnout.

But now, two weeks deep into the change, he was starting to feel like an outsider in a story he’d once felt lucky to be part of.

Breakfast runs used to be your thing.

It had started after your second call together — a collapsed balcony with two patients and a lot of adrenaline.

Buck had bought you a coffee to calm your nerves and you’d smiled like it meant more than just caffeine. After that, it became ritual. You even had a usual order.

Now?

You didn’t even ask if he was coming.

Buck found you outside the diner that morning, standing by the curb while Eddie laughed at something Chim said through the window.

You were focused on your phone, but your face was too blank for someone reading a meme. You looked… elsewhere. And that scared him more than anything.

“Hey,” he said, approaching slowly. “Got room for one more?”

You looked up, startled. Your smile was polite. Too polite.

“Of course.”

That should’ve been comforting. It wasn’t.

He slid into the booth beside you once inside — you didn’t protest, but you didn’t shift closer, either. Chim and Eddie talked around you both, but Buck barely heard any of it. His stomach was too twisted.

And when you offered Eddie a bite of your toast with a soft laugh — the same kind Buck hadn’t heard in days — something inside him snapped quiet.

You both ended up walking out together afterward, coffees in hand, the LA morning sun not yet punishing. He waited until you reached the edge of the lot before breaking the silence.

“You’ve been distant.”

You froze just a little — not fully, but enough for him to notice.

“I’ve been tired,” you replied.

“That’s not what I asked.”

You sighed, brushing hair from your face. “Buck, it’s nothing personal.”

“But it feels personal.”

That made you pause. Really pause. Buck looked at you like he was trying to solve a puzzle he didn’t have all the pieces for.

“You used to talk to me.”

“I still talk to you.”

“Not like before.”

That quiet hung between you, longer than it should have. Cars rolled by. Somewhere nearby, someone honked. It all faded into background noise.

“I just needed space,” you said finally. “That’s all.”

“From me?” Buck asked, not unkindly — just hurt. And it was that part of him — the aching, raw honesty he only ever let out with people he trusted — that finally cracked through.

You didn’t answer right away. And maybe you didn’t need to.

“Did I do something?” he asked softly. “Or not do something?”

You looked down at your cup. “It’s not about you, Buck. Not completely.”

“Then help me understand.”

You exhaled. Slow. Heavy.

“I care about you. That hasn’t changed,” you said. “But this job… what we do, what we see — I’m trying to protect myself. And lately, I’ve been feeling things I shouldn’t.”

“What kind of things?”

“I worry about you,” you said.

“Every damn call. Every time you take a risk or crack a joke to hide how much you care. I worry because you act like you’re invincible when none of us are.”

Buck blinked. That was the last thing he expected.

“I worry about you all the time too,” he said.

“You think I don’t notice when you zone out after a call? Or when you touch your shoulder like it still hurts from the collapse?”

You looked at him then, and it was the first time in a while you really looked. Buck felt it in his ribs.

“I didn’t mean to shut you out,” you said, voice quieter now. “I just didn’t know how to make room for… this.”

“For what?”

“For how much I care about you.”

That stopped Buck cold.

For a second, he couldn’t speak — which was rare for him. He ran a hand through his hair, swallowed hard.

“I thought I was imagining it,” he admitted. “When you started hanging around Eddie more, I thought… maybe you were just over me.”

“I needed a breather,” you said gently. “And Eddie’s easy to be around when you’re trying not to feel everything at once.”

Buck nodded. He understood that more than you knew.

“I don’t want to be a distraction,” he said finally. “But I don’t want to be out of your life either.”

“You’re not,” you said quickly. “You’re not. I just need to go slow. For my own heart.”

Buck gave you a smile — soft, genuine, a little sad but somehow still hopeful. “I can do slow. I can do anything, really… just not losing you.”

You reached out and touched his wrist, just briefly, but it sent a warmth through both of you.

“You’re not losing me, Buck,” you said. “Just finding me again. In a different way.”

He nodded.

And for the first time in weeks, the silence between you didn’t feel like a wall.

It felt like a bridge.

The shift was slow.

Rare for L.A. — rare for the 118 — but the quiet was almost a welcome reprieve.

The four of them had just wrapped up restocking the rig after a minor call, and Buck found himself sitting on the tailgate with Eddie, nursing a bottle of water and trying not to let his thoughts spiral.

You weren’t on shift today.

And somehow, that made him more aware of your absence than usual.

Eddie glanced at him from the driver’s side. “You good?”

“Yeah,” Buck said automatically — then sighed, tipping his head back toward the sky. “Actually, no. Not really.”

Eddie raised a brow, folding his arms and leaning against the rig. “Wanna talk about it?”

Buck hesitated. “What’s Y/N been saying?”

Eddie blinked. “That’s direct.”

“Yeah, well. I’ve been going in circles in my head for two weeks, so I figured I’d try a straight line for once.”

That earned a short laugh from Eddie. “She’s… she’s been quieter. But not cold. Still herself, just maybe… more internal lately.”

Buck nodded. “She talks to you though.”

“She talks to everyone, Buck. Just not you the same way right now. You know why.”

He did. But hearing it said aloud still stung.

Hen and Chimney appeared around the corner, Hen wiping her hands on a towel while Chim juggled two protein bars and a Gatorade.

“Talking about Y/N?” Chim guessed with zero subtlety.

“Wow. Okay,” Buck muttered.

Hen smiled knowingly. “It’s not hard to tell. You’ve been sulking like a sad golden retriever since the breakfast run.”

“That obvious, huh?”

“Painfully,” Eddie replied.

Hen sat beside Buck and nudged him with her shoulder. “You wanna know what she said the other night?”

Buck’s eyes narrowed. “You’re just gonna tell me?”

“She said she didn’t know what to do with someone who felt permanent.”

That made the words hit like a sucker punch. Buck’s grip on his water bottle tightened.

“She said,” Hen continued, “that for the first time in a long time, she had something that scared her in a good way. And it scared her so much, she didn’t know if it would survive her fear.”

“She meant me?”

“She didn’t say it. But she didn’t have to.”

Buck went quiet.

Chim leaned against the door, eyes thoughtful. “Y/N’s always been calm in the chaos. But when it comes to people she lets in… she’s selective. You got past the filters.”

“I didn’t mean to overwhelm her,” Buck said, voice low.

“You didn’t,” Eddie said. “But you surprised her. That’s different.”

Buck glanced at all of them. “Why does it feel like I’m the only one who didn’t know what was happening until it was too late?”

Hen softened. “Maybe because you’re not used to something being real, Buck. You’re used to the storm, not the quiet after.”

Buck didn’t say anything for a long moment.

Then: “I think I love her.”

The words felt like oxygen and a confession in one breath.

“I didn’t mean to,” he added quickly.

“I just… it crept up on me. Somewhere between the way she remembers everyone’s coffee order and the way she calms people after the worst days of their lives. Somewhere in how she’s always steady, even when she’s falling apart.”

He ran a hand through his hair, eyes wide now that he’d said it aloud. “I think I love her. And I don’t know what to do with that.”

The group went still for a moment — not shocked, but holding the weight of the moment carefully.

“You don’t do anything,” Eddie said, voice quiet and firm.

“Not right away. You be there. You let her come back to you. And when she does, you make sure she knows it’s safe to stay.”

Buck blinked, chest tightening.

“And if she doesn’t?” he asked.

“Then she wasn’t ready,” Hen said. “But I think she is. I just think she’s scared.”

“And you know what it’s like to love someone who’s scared,” Chim added. “So… don’t rush her.”

Buck nodded slowly.

He looked around at the people who had been his constants — even when he hadn’t been his best. People who saw through the ego, the recklessness, the mess.

He’d never imagined the moment of falling in love would come with so much stillness. But now that he’d recognized it… he didn’t want to run from it.

“I’ll wait,” Buck said. “Whatever it takes.”

Eddie patted his shoulder. “Good. Because she’s worth it.”

Buck looked toward the horizon — where the next call, the next shift, the next chance would come.

And somewhere in all that unknown, he hoped you were waiting too.

It was strange, being off shift and still feeling like you were waiting for something to go off — like a bell, a siren, a call that never came.

You hadn’t been sleeping much.

You hadn’t been talking much either.

At least, not to him.

Not since that breakfast run where Buck had looked at you like you were slipping through his fingers and didn’t know how to stop it.

It had been easier, in a way, to talk to Chim, to Hen, even Eddie — because it meant avoiding the one person who made your heart pace harder than a four-alarm call.

But today, you’d needed something softer.

So you texted Maddie.

Mind if I come by? I kinda miss Jeeyun.

Maddie had responded within a minute:

We’d love to see you. She’s teething like a tiny gremlin but I promise we’ll try to make it fun.

Now, you sat curled up on the couch in her apartment, a blanket half-draped across your legs, a drool-stained burp cloth clutched loosely in your hand, and Jeeyun nestled in your lap like a warm, squirming bundle of grounding energy.

“She likes you,” Maddie said softly from the kitchen, mug of tea in hand.

“She’s a baby,” you murmured. “She likes everyone.”

“No,” Maddie said, settling beside you. “She likes you. Not everyone gets that giggle from her.”

Jeeyun babbled loudly, her fingers wrapped around yours.

You smiled, but it didn’t quite reach your eyes.

Maddie didn’t press. Not at first.

“I’m guessing this visit isn’t just about teething woes and baby cuddles.”

You sighed, brushing a hand down Jeeyun’s back.

“No. I just… I needed quiet. And I needed not to be at the station. Every time I walk in there, I feel like everyone’s waiting for me to say something.”

“About Buck?”

You nodded. “He’s… I don’t know. I don’t know where we stand.”

Maddie watched you carefully.

“Do you want to know what I think?” You glanced at her.

“I texted you, didn’t I?”

She chuckled lightly. “Fair.”

There was a pause, quiet except for Jeeyun’s soft breaths.

“I think my brother can be reckless. Impulsive. Emotionally chaotic. But I’ve never — not once — seen him as focused or consistent as he’s been since you came around.”

You looked away. “He’s… he’s Buck. That scares me.”

“Because you think he’ll mess up?”

“Because I think he won’t. And then I’ll be the one who doesn’t know how to handle it.”

That admission came with a weight you hadn’t expected — a kind of ache you hadn’t named until now. Maddie leaned forward, resting her arms on her knees.

“You’re not the only one who’s scared. Buck doesn’t do vulnerability well, not with feelings like this. But he’s trying. And believe me, I would know.”

You swallowed hard. “I don’t want to be someone he gets tired of. Someone he looks at one day and realizes he wanted something easier.”

“He already had easier,” Maddie said. “And none of it made him feel what he feels now.”

Your eyes burned, but you didn’t cry.

You just looked at the baby in your lap, who cooed and grabbed at your dog tags like she was trying to keep you grounded.

Maddie added gently, “If Buck had to choose between a steady life without you or a chaotic one with you in it, he’d pick the chaos. Every time. I know my brother. And I wouldn’t see him with anyone else.”

That last part — I wouldn’t see him with anyone else — cracked something inside you.

It was one thing to wonder if he felt what you felt. It was another to hear it spoken, with certainty, from someone who knew him best.

You nodded slowly, pressing a kiss to Jeeyun’s hair. “Thanks for letting me come over.”

Maddie smiled. “Anytime. Especially if it helps bring you back to him.”

You didn’t answer.

But you thought about how Buck looked at you like you were something he didn’t want to lose.

And maybe… just maybe… you weren’t ready to lose him either.

There wasn’t a moment he could point to when it began — no grand gesture, no dramatic reconciliation.

But it started, he realized, during a call.

A routine one, even. An apartment fire, thick smoke, elderly couple trapped on the third floor.

Buck was on the hose line, you were searching rooms with Chim, and the second he heard your voice over the comms — calm, clear, certain — something in his chest loosened.

Then, something else happened.

You came back.

Not all at once. But in pieces.

During cleanup, you passed him a water bottle and murmured, “Nice knockdown.” Your eyes met his.

Not too long, not too soft. But you looked, and Buck noticed. Buck felt it.

The next shift, you called out for him during another call — “Buck, left hallway’s clear, I’m heading back out with Hen” — and your voice didn’t sound clipped like it used to.

It was steadier. Almost like… you wanted him to hear it.

He started hearing it more and more.

You began standing a little closer when you briefed with the team. You laughed again — not at him, not because of him — but near him. And it mattered. God, it mattered.

During a high-rise evacuation with B-Shift, you caught his wrist when he was climbing the stairs too fast and simply said, “Don’t push your knee, you’re limping again.”

It wasn’t playful, but it was gentle. The kind of thing you used to say before all the silence.

And Buck held onto it like oxygen.

Hen noticed first.

She leaned into him at the back of the rig as you checked Chim’s minor burn. “You feel that?” she murmured, tilting her head in your direction.

Buck didn’t answer. Just followed the way you were focused on Chim, how your hand moved with practiced ease, how you smiled slightly when Chim made a joke about pain being temporary and dramatic flair being forever.

“She’s softening again,” Hen said quietly. “Good job not screwing it up this time. Yet.”

Buck let out a breath he didn’t realize he was holding.

Later that night, Chim tugged Buck aside while restocking the trauma bags.

“You know she asked about you last shift?”

Buck’s heart thudded. “She did?”

“Yeah. Something about how your wrist was holding up after that fall. Didn’t want to ask directly, I guess.”

Buck couldn’t stop the small smile that crept in.

“She cares,” Chim added. “Still. Maybe more than ever.”

That did something to Buck — not just fill him with hope, but anchor him. Because for the first time in a long time, the thing that had been tearing at him didn’t feel like loss. It felt like a second chance he hadn’t even known he was working toward.

At the next call, he was assigned to your side again.

And when you both cleared the scene, soot-smeared and tired, you nudged his arm lightly with your shoulder.

“Nice teamwork, Buck.” His chest bloomed warm at that.

“Thanks,” he said softly, catching your eyes again. “I missed it.”

There was a pause. You didn’t flinch. Didn’t pull away.

“Me too,” you said. And it wasn’t nothing.

In fact, it felt like everything.

It was after another long shift.

One of those where your muscles ached in ways you didn’t realize they could, but the adrenaline was still running high.

The sun had barely cracked over the horizon when the 118 rolled back into the station, your silhouettes golden in the dawn.

Buck stretched his back with a groan, watching you unclip your radio with one hand and rub the back of your neck with the other.

He was just about to say something — anything — when you turned to him with that same look you used to wear months ago. The one that came with trust.

“Coffee?” you asked. Then — after a beat — “Breakfast?”

His heart did a quiet somersault.

“Yeah,” he said, voice soft. “Yeah, I’d like that.”

You walked a few blocks in comfortable silence. No teasing. No awkward tension. Just footsteps echoing side by side until you found a small diner tucked on the corner of an empty street.

It wasn’t fancy — red booths, yellow lighting, a faint smell of syrup in the air — but it felt safe.

You picked a booth by the window. Sat across from him. And when the waitress poured coffee into your cups, you stirred in sugar like it was second nature.

For a while, it was easy.

You talked about the calls. About Christopher’s latest obsession with stop-motion animation. About Chim’s plan to prank Ravi again and how Hen was already scheming a counterattack.

And then — mid-bite into your pancake — you set your fork down.

“I used to think nothing in my life stayed,” you said suddenly, eyes on your plate. “Family. Friends. I don’t know, stability just… always felt like it slipped right through.”

Buck blinked. Because it felt like you had just cracked something open in him too.

“But the 118… it stuck,” you continued. “And I guess somewhere along the way, you did too.”

Buck’s throat went dry.

“I know we never said anything outright,” you went on, quieter now. “But I felt it. I know you did too.”

“I did,” Buck said, immediately, almost breathless. “I do.”

The way you looked at him then — hopeful, hesitant — it punched through him like nothing else.

“You scared me,” you admitted. “Not because of who you were, but because I didn’t know if I could handle how much I wanted to stay where you were.”

His heart was racing. He leaned in, hands wrapped around his mug to keep them steady.

“I’ve always been afraid of people leaving,” Buck said, voice low.

“Most of them did. Except the 118. Except you. And I was such a mess when we met — sleeping around, numbing out, pretending like nothing mattered. But you…” He exhaled. “You looked at me like I could still be something good.”

You stared at him for a long moment.

“Because you are,” you said.

Silence stretched between you. Not uncomfortable, but full. Full of everything unsaid that no longer needed to be hidden.

Then, softly, you added, “We’ve both been afraid of losing the things that matter. But maybe this time, we don’t have to.”

Buck felt the weight of it — that promise. That hope.

He reached across the table slowly, gently, letting his fingers brush yours. And you didn’t pull away.

“I’m not going anywhere,” he said.

You smiled — small, but real.

“Good,” you whispered. “Because I’m tired of running.”

There wasn’t an announcement.

No dramatic revelation. No secret whispers caught in the locker room. But something shifted.

It started small — the way Buck hovered just a little closer to you after morning roll call.

The way your elbow would brush his when you reached for the same granola bar in the kitchen, and neither of you flinched away anymore. The way you’d grab an extra cup of coffee during breaks without being asked.

Hen noticed first.

Of course she did. She always did.

She didn’t say anything at first — just arched a brow and smirked a little to herself when Buck instinctively grabbed the end of a hose line before you had the chance to haul it alone. She made a bet with Chim the moment she saw you both return from a supply run with that familiar soft flush on your faces.

“Twenty bucks says they’re already halfway in,” Hen muttered, sipping her coffee as you and Buck disappeared around the engine. Chimney blinked after you.

“They’ve been soft with each other lately,” he admitted. “Buck didn’t even try to one-up Eddie on that last rescue. That’s growth.”

“Love’ll do that to you,” Hen said with a grin.

Eddie noticed, too — quietly, in the way only Eddie could. He wasn’t surprised. Not really. He’d seen the way Buck looked at you for months now, even before Buck knew what he was feeling. And he’d seen how you looked back like you were trying not to fall but were already halfway there.

He hadn’t said anything, but the first time Buck helped Christopher adjust his helmet during a family BBQ with you smiling in the background, Eddie knew. And he was happy. Genuinely happy.

Bobby didn’t need to say much either. Just gave Buck a knowing pat on the shoulder one day after a call — the kind of gesture that said, I see it. I trust it. Take care of her.

Even Ravi, the last one to catch on, noticed how you leaned into Buck’s side during team lunches. How you laughed easier now. How Buck seemed to listen more — not just with his ears, but with his heart.

It wasn’t just affection.

It was something steadier.

And you felt it too.

For the first time in a long time, you didn’t flinch at the idea of something lasting. You weren’t waiting for the other shoe to drop, or for Buck to disappear when things got too hard. He had been showing up — for you, for the team, for himself — in a way that wasn’t performative. It was real.

You caught Hen watching you one morning in the kitchen. She was grinning.

“What?” you asked, sipping your coffee.

“You just look happy,” she said, like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

You smiled back, a little shy but not scared. “I think I am.”

Buck came up behind you, ruffling your hair with that ridiculous grin of his before stealing a bite of your toast.

“Hey,” you laughed.

“What? We share now,” he teased, mouth full.

Hen just shook her head and muttered something about whipped golden retrievers.

The rest of the day passed like any other — calls, chaos, controlled urgency — but the difference was in the pauses. The quiet in-betweens where Buck would find you, touch your hand briefly, or glance your way like you were the thing grounding him to the world.

And for once, you weren’t afraid of what that meant.

Because he wasn’t afraid either.

This wasn’t the kind of love that burned too fast and too bright. This was the kind that unfolded. That stayed. That chose you every day, in every little moment — even the ones no one else saw.

You were still the same firefighter. Still the same paramedic.

But now, in the laughter around the table, the warmth of the 118’s eyes on you, the feel of Buck’s fingers brushing yours when he thought no one was looking — you felt something new:

Home.

© fordiaz 25’ -. no part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any manner without the permission from the publisher.

[pedge-page]

Wait ok hear me out. Bored preggo wife starts reading smut and finds she really enjoys a breeding kink/men getting real nasty and aggressively talking about breeding their woman. So she asks Joel to try it and when he does, she’s like grossed out “uhh… nevermind” and he’s so fuckin frustrated and blue balled 😂

Joel Dealing with Preggo Wife: Role Play Me Not

Notes: Thank you for your patience with these requests lately, this one was from March and I've been thinking about it ever since!

warnings: almost smut, lots of dirty talk and degrading language, and usual shennanigans with these two

18+ ONLY

- - - -

It’s pretty late, Joel’s body is wracked, and nothing feels better than the foam mattress bed he’s curled up on. You had a pretty good day, judging by your happy soft hums and scrolling aimlessly on your phone. Hopefully whatever nonsense thing you’re gonna purchase with his card and surprise his doorstep tomorrow morning won’t be too harrowing, but for now, he’ll live with it if it means some rest.

But your incessant giggles, matched with the way you’re shrinking under your brightly lit phone reading something so furiously just begs Joel to ask:

“What are you doin’?”

“Nothin!” You quip quickly, rotating best you can so he can’t see the obvious thing you’re hiding on your phone.

“Okay.” He tosses the cover over his shoulder and presses his head back into the pillow again to close his eyes.

Obviously not the answer you wanted, so you loudly snort with your fake ass ‘Tee Hee!’ again because this motherfucker better take the god damn hint.

He sighs. “What.”

“Hmm? Nothin!”

Joel squeezes his eyes shut, gritting his teeth. You can’t see his face from your side, but even if you could, he doesn’t think it would deter you.

You clear your throat before uttering your loudest and most obnoxious giggle.

“JUST—!” Tossing the covers down and rolling to his back, he remembers to take a breath, channeling his calm bear voice. “—just show me already. Please.” He’s exhausted, rubbing his face with both hands before holding out one palm behind him for you to place your phone.

You excitedly shove it in his grasp, and Joel rolls over to see. His eyes take a moment to adjust to the brightness, so he collects his reading-glasses from the tableside and props them upon his nose.

Its quiet for a solid minute, and your heart is racing as he stare at his broad back, the fabric of his shirt all stretched tight to accentuate that massive man of man that is your manly man—

He rolls back over with a questionable uncertainty, fear and paralysis mixed with concern and shock.

You’re giddily nodding your head, lips tucked under your teeth from the excitement. “Can we do that?”

He opens his mouth but no words come out. He doesn’t even know where to begin. 

“This is—uh. you like…this?”

“Well I don’t know, but I wanna give it a try…”

He scratches his skull with two fingers, hoping it’ll dig deep enough to itch the bad feeling he has in his brain. “I don’t know, baby, It’s a bit … much.” 

“But you call me your pretty slutty wife sometimes! It’s not much different!”

He glances back at the vivid words on the screen. It is VERY much different than that. But you put on your famous puppy pout, with those big round gleaming eyes, trembling fishy lips staring up at him, topping it off by squishing your tits together so they’re bursting out of the nightgown and smashing into his chest.

That’ll do it.

He shrugs, chucking his bifocals behind him with renewed energy arousing his body, especially down south. He gets to his knees, pulling your cover off from your lap and tracing his big hands over the soft expanse of your thigh like a new toy. you bite your lips, shouldering off your spaghetti straps so your tits are close to being popped out. He rolls the soft fabric of your gown up your growing belly and presses his lips against the swell. “Shit, that’s what I like to see. Gonna be a little fuck toy whore for Daddy to play with?”

“Ah…time out.” You hold your hands in a T formation. He stops rubbing and looks down towards your face. 

“Uh—yes?”

“I don’t like whore.”

“Ah okay—Daddy’s fuck toy?”

“Ok that’s—mmm.”

“What? No good?”

“It’s just ok. We’ll work on that. You can keep going.”

He shakes his head a little but resumes his gentle ghost of his fingers and lips, cascading lower until the scratchy prickle of his beard is at your naval. “Bred ya nice n’ good huh? Little breedin’ stock just f’me—“

“Oh hold on.”

“What.”

“Breeding ‘stock’? What am I, chicken soup?” You chuckle.

He purses his lips. “I don’t know, it was in the damn fic you made me read!”

“Okay okay, sheesh!” You toss your hands up.

“Can I please keep goin now?”

You nod, and he commences lower. 

“Body was made for breeding. Now spread those petals—“

“Oh what I’m a flower now?”

“Damnit, Baby! Am I doin this or not??” He curses. 

You go quiet and nod again, shrinking in against the headboard.

“Just about had it with ya whinin’, baby. I should tie you up like the naughty cow you are—“

“Farm metaphor again?”

“N BREED YOU—“ he seethes, gripping your thighs and hitching them around his hips so you can feel his bulge press into your core. “Breed you over and over again, like the dumb little cum dump you deserve—“

“Ugh hold up this position isn’t comfortable I need ta—“ you wiggle out of his grasp and begin trying to alleviate the pressure your baby is putting on your spine. Joel all but abandons holding your legs as he sits on his knees in front of you with his thumb and finger pressed tightly into his eye sockets. 

You wiggle and roll, unable to find a good position to sink yourself comfortably. The bed shifts with each turn, and Joel is damn near done role playing with you and about to just fuck you with your face down in the mattress whether you wanted to or not when—

“Okie! I’m ready Daddio!” You announce. 

You’re in the exact same position.

“Are we good to continue?” He asks slowly, his frustration being held at bay along with his hard cock that’s begging for some action finally.

You nod. 

He finally tugs his dick out and positions it at your entrance, spitting onto your slit. “Now shut up, take this fucking cock, and let me fuck my seed into you cuz that’s all ya good for—“

“Ya know what.” You wave your hand over this whole scene. “I’m done. This is … no. Nevermind, I’m done with this. M’ready for bed now.”

You slap his cock away like it’s a needy hand and roll to your side, slinking the cover over your shoulder again and turning off your light with a little grin. 

Joel just falls back on his haunches, his cheeks puffed red, balls swollen blue, fully awake all over, with a grumpy cat-worthy scowl etched into his face staring down at you.

- - - -

Taglist:

@harriedandharassed @lola8888673 @its-nebuleuse @zliteraturehoe @merz-8 @joeldjarin @pascalscoffin @pedroshotwifey @ghostslillady @innerpersonunknown @missladym1981 @mrsoharaxx @survivingandenduring @milla-frenchy @cockykookiee @fairytale07 @daddy-din @pedropascalsbbg @spookyxsam @somehopeatlast @millercontracting @pedrostories @mishala005 @theoraekenslover @animez96 @not-a-unique-snowflake-blog @puduvallee @cassiecasluciluce @loohoop @himboelover @callsignwidow

[sxftkxssxs]

I love your writing when it comes to the arcana! We’ve seen the main 6 with a winged mc- but what about the courtiers? (Idk how specific we can get with the asks so you can ignore this next part) and if winged mc would occasionally make bird noises- like squawking or chirping depending.

you can absolutely get specific! I love hearing everyone's ideas and how they expand on the original!! I'm very glad you like my writing!

Courtiers with a Winged!MC

Volta

Resident Sweetheart thinks your wings are absolutely gorgeous!

She'd love to look closer one of these days but hey-! Was that food she saw over there?

Volta admires from afar for the most part, if you can get her curiosity to get the better of her for a moment she'll willingly investigate with your permission!

She doesn't have the patience to run her hands through your feathers though, you might wanna find someone else for that job.

If you give her one of your feathers she's immediately tearing up, promising to keep it safe for you.

She probably ends up wearing it somewhere or hiding it in a spot she specifically picked out for it.

She doesn't mind if you chirp or squawk! She might think there's a lose bird and get excited at first but she gets used to it.

Valerius

Oh, is he enamored.

He LOVES your wings. He thinks that they're the epitome of beauty.

If you have feathers and allow him to run his fingers through them he'll be completely at peace. Can you blame him? Pretty and soft things are too good to pass up.

Gods forbid if you actually give him a feather to keep. He'll accessorize the hell out of that! Wearing it in his hair, a necklace, you name it.

If your wings are more leathery he still thinks they're beautiful! He'd still be content to brush his fingers on them every once in a while.

Purely my self indulgence coming through but I believe he'd love to help you care for your wings. He might be more into it than you.

Valerius has the best products, ushering you to the baths as soon as they arrive. In his mind, helping you with your wings in the baths is like helping someone wash their hair. Its intimate and peaceful. He might tear up the first time.

Valerius actually loves the occasional chirp, but do not squawk near him. He can try to be nice all he wants but that noise hurts his ears and is quite unpleasant to say the least.

Vlastomil

He thinks they're beautiful! Even though they represent almost the exact opposite of his gorgeous worms..

With Vlastomil he's much more content to admire with more distance than the others. Though if you insist he might think about a more close up investigation.

He'll help you with your wings if you ask him to, thought he's not as knowledgeable as Valerius so you might have to consult him beforehand.

Vulgora

They think it is absolutely BADASS!

Vulgora thinks leather wings are cooler, even if there isn't a huge difference in how they work. They'd still love them if you had feathered wings.

If you can actually fly with your wings they'll get even more excited. They'll suggest "dodging practice" and for your safety say no.

They'd be perplexed if you wanted them to brush through your feathers or just simply feel your wings. Gentle touch is absolutely foreign with Vulgora. They'll have to ease into it honestly.

Vlademar

They have questions, which is the only warning you'll get.

How do they bend? Are they identical to bird wings? Can you actually fly with them? How easily do they break?

At first you'll likely have to deal with them somewhat gently bending your wings, feeling around them, and if you have them, even occasionally leaving with some of your feathers.

When they do take some feathers they put them in a jar, yes, they have a jar. But hey! At least its your own jar?

Eventually they'll get bored of fully examining you...that is until you start chirping or squawking. That gets them interested all over again.

They aren't bothered, quite the opposite. They want to know if the noises are natural and if so, why? It'll be a long few nights for you I fear..

[rafayelsbelovedbride]

Society resting on the misery of the unfortunate.

Since the themes of sacrificing a certain someone for the greater good is the main focus for the stories of the LIs, I can’t help but to analyze their reactions as the ones who walk away from Omelas.

For Xavier, it is very obvious. The moment he found out the truth, he walked away. He walked away from Philos, but also from the MC too. No matter how much he’s trying to find a solution, he still left her behind, although to save her. Maybe, that was not the plan, maybe he underestimated the time he would need, or maybe overestimated other people’s patience. Of course, there were unforeseen circumstances too. Xavier only tried to abandon the land that put him and her into this position, he tried to find a new place and elope too, but he still ended up abandoning her too. Queen MC is still not safe, she feels abandoned, she feels left alone, and she still has no idea what is going to happen to her. In Xavier’s case, he walked away from Philos, but his actions have not solved any of the problems. It’s been hundreds of years since he was gone, but Philos is still there, thriving. And MC is still the child in the basement.

For Rafayel, his circumstances are pretty similar to Xavier's. While Lemuria and Earth are described as two different worlds, they still share the same planet. So, what if the reason for Earth’s long existence was due to Lemurians constantly feeding the Earth’s core with sacrifices. Sea gods are described as the beings that keep the flames of Lemuria alight. And when one sea god dies, it has to be replaced with a new one to keep the Lemuria in its place. But, I find it hard to believe this is the entire truth. The sea gods are not really described as actual gods, but more like sacrifices. Rafayel was a child that was found next to the flames with its power within himself. But, was he the sea god, or was he declared as the sea god? Rafayel is raised as the sea god by the elders (whom he doesn’t really like), his aunt, and his teacher. But I struggle to find the proof that he is not being manipulated, especially by the elders. And I wonder, were there other ‘most devoted followers’ that had to give their heart to the sea god. Did the previous sea god, which was a whale, receive a human’s heart too? Or is Rafayel being considered as the last sea god because finally the Lemurians found a permanent solution to their problems about the earth’s core. And that is the same solution as the one that the king of Philos showed Xavier. Either Rafayel takes her heart and becomes the perfect sacrifice with the aether core now in his heart as the sea god, or they put MC into the abyss without her memories to die and reincarnate over and over again.

But Rafayel believes that he is the sea god. He believes in the stories that was maybe just made up by the elders. He thinks he needs his most devoted follower’s heart and not the aether core. He thinks he has to be the god that can protect the Lemuria and be trusted by the Lemurians. But he fails. He fails the duty that was the only reason for his existence. This is where Xavier’s and Rafayel’s stories differ. Xavier sees this duty as something that was pushed into his way without his consent, and Rafayel sees it as the reason for his existence. And that’s why Xavier is more resentful towards Philos, but Rafayel has this resentment towards MC. Rafayel is the sea god, he should not be swayed by some mortal. He should not be manipulated, he should prioritize his responsibilities towards Lemuria, and Lemuria only. But he fails. Every single time. And he feels guilty. Guilty because he is witnessing all of his kind, all those innocent Lemurians being massacred by the humans because he chose a human over Lemuria’s existence, because he lied.

But Rafayel’s choice does not only affect the Lemuria. The disappearance of the Lemurians only accelerates the death of the planet, not just Lemuria but as a whole. Maybe Lemurians, with their little, immortalized Cardiac Microvascular Endothelial Cells, (LCMECs) were keeping the earth’s core intact every time they died. And that’s why sending people to Philos’s core worked, because humans found immortality through these same cells that they were researching. Maybe that’s what ‘returning into the sea when they die’ was supposed to represent. Maybe the Seamoon Ceremony was about this. Maybe the Lemurians, the elders wanted to transfer this responsibility that Lemurians had shouldered for centuries without humans knowing to a human. A human that can die a thousand deaths, and die a thousand deaths again.

But Rafayel ruined it. Now; the Earth died, Rafayel died, Lemurians died, and Philos is repeating the same mistakes again. Rafayel chose to walk away from Lemuria with MC by his side, but this decision only killed him along with everyone while MC was still bound by this fate.

And in Sylus’s case, the way he keeps emphasizing they are the same, true kindred spirits, somehow suggests that he is also the same child in misery in the basement alongside MC. We’re still waiting for his myths, so it may be a little early to talk about his version of the story, but I’m going to do it anyway.  Maybe before people discovered MC’s existence, or maybe even before she came into existence, there was Sylus, with the weight of the world on his shoulders. Maybe in another world, he died a thousand deaths, and died a thousand more all over again. But unlike MC, he remembers everything. He remembers all his life, all his loss and all of the people who made him into this monster. So, he is not the perfect sacrifice. A perfect sacrifice should not resent, a perfect sacrifice should not turn into a monster, a perfect sacrifice should give up their life with a smile, and a perfect sacrifice should be the perfect victim. A perfect sacrifice should not remember the atrocities that were committed against her. So, maybe just when Sylus thought he freed himself from this fate, he saw that he was only replaced. They now have the perfect sacrifice in the palm of their blood-soaked hands.

Now, how can he walk away from the little soul that was sentenced to become the same monster he became? He can’t, and he won’t. He would rather chase the MC to the end of the world, only to remind her what these people put her through. If MC cannot be angry, he will be in her stead. If MC cannot resent, he will resent. If MC has no reason to fight, he will give it to her. If MC cannot own her memories, he will keep all of them safe in his head. He will always be there to remind her, she can escape her fate. So maybe now, Sylus too became the perfect sacrifice, as he willingly embraces this fate and he willingly takes her place. And maybe he hopes that one day after he is reborn again, he will find MC when she remembers, when the cycle is broken. But he is always left disappointed. She does not remember, so she must have died again, she must have been sacrificed again without him being able to prevent. He is angry, because no matter how many times he takes her place, she is still not safe. He is angry because he cannot escape this destiny.

And then we have Zayne. The one who sees MC’s destiny, the one who sees the never-ending cycle. The Master of Fate who can control how long a human is allowed to live. And maybe, also the one who can end it all. I wonder why MC was considered as a variable who will be resented by people even though she has no intention to harm. Because we see that this was true, she was resented by Lemurians, and maybe also by the people of Philos. Every time she refuses to die, she will harm people. Maybe that’s why the old man asked Master of Fate to get rid of the variable, so that the cycle wouldn’t even start. But Zayne defied fate, he gave MC an even longer life instead. And he was punished for it.

Master of Fate was given a solution; if the child in the basement never exists, then this ethical dilemma would also cease to exist with it. But of course, he could not accept this solution. He could not let MC die. Maybe he made this choice because he was sure he could protect MC from all the consequences of this decision. But, he loses his memories. With the punishment he receives, Astra locks his memories. He can only remember MC when it is already too late. He is destined to either helplessly watch MC die or die before he can help her. Zayne is the one who made MC the perfect sacrifice, and he is the one who is destined to live with this regret.

[synnthamonsugar]

Still thinking about this post and continuing to be frustrated about Elsie, and how poorly developed her relationship with Eris and Drifter is, and how underutilized their friendship is in general.

Thinking about the intersections of their lives. Elsie knows Eris and Drifter, even if they don't know her. Elsie has faced off against Eris at her worst, and now stands at her side at her best. Elsie has found Drifter dead as he desperately and selfishly tried to survive, and now he's alive, more sure of himself, more willing to look out for his friends.

And Eris and Drifter don't know Elsie at first, but they must trust her for their collective survival — for humanity, the Traveler and the Light, if they are to use Darkness against Darkness.

Thinking about the parallels of their stories. Elsie, who like Eris trapped in the Pit, has pressed on day after day, held onto hope against better reason, who finally finds a way out, traumatized, changed, but wiser. Elsie, who like Drifter, has lived by different names and identities, has endured betrayal, and withstood apocalypse.

Thinking about these three as the three who transcended their design, as foretold by The Nine. The hourglass counting down with infinite patience, the forgotten blade sharpened anew, and the dredgen. Their meeting is not just happenstance, but fate.

How satisfying it would have been for them to find in each other what they lost or never had. For Elsie, friends to walk at her side as she escapes the cycle and faces an unknown future. For Eris, a fireteam; not a replacement for her lost comrades, but a chance to make new ones. And Drifter gets a crew he will neither be betrayed by nor forced to betray — learning the real meaning of trust.

I think a catastrophic disservice has been done to all three by focusing on Eris' and Drifter's relationship, all but cutting Elsie out of the picture. It would have been so much more powerful to have Eris send a radio message to Elsie and Drifter talking about how their friendship helped her aspire to more than survival. Imagine if all three continued their studies of the Pyramid and its technology together, continuing the arc first started in Beyond Light. (This one is shockingly egregious for being set on Europa and hand-waving Elsie away to focus on Eris and Drifter — as the fandom does.) What if Elsie and Drifter had visited Eris together in Season of the Witch, what if Elsie had told Eris that she trusted her despite the terror she felt at Eris picking up the mantle of hive god as she had in all her dark futures, instead of getting into fights with Ikora over it?

These are relatively small tweaks to the narrative that would have kept Elsie relevant beyond her role as emotional support sister to Ana, would have added depth to all three, and truly established them as a "Dark" mirror to the Vanguard. I'm heartened that all three were together at the final battle, but it sucks that we got zero development of their relationship between their fight with House Salvation in BL, and the very end of TFS.

Just!! What they could have been. What the writers and fandom could have made of them. Man.

[vallification]

armin arlert headcanons!!!

notes: au/noncanon oriented, some apply to canon too, maybe a few mature themes!!!

let me know your thoughts!!!

armin’s eyes are bright and clear uranian blue (#afdbf5)

obviously armin is scary smart, but even when he doesn’t know something he can guess with about 95% accuracy.

nerdmin is real.

his “nerd thing” is fantasy stuff. skyrim, renaissance faires, dnd, etc.

armin is the pc gamer god, so much so that eren and jean both plainly refuse to play against him. if they’re not on armin’s side they won’t play.

armin, sasha, jean, and connie have a stardew co-op farm. he’s achieved perfection on his own in five different loads

he played soccer from middle school to college. the privilege of playing college ball was a crazy surprise because he was weaker and smaller than everyone on the team— however, he was definitely quicker.

armin does calisthenics now because he greatly appreciates the control it gives him over his body. since he doesn’t workout for muscle growth you wouldn’t be able to tell from appearances, but he is incredibly strong

the movie perfectly captured my hc for his aesthetic, maybe a bit more mature looking than that but it’s otherwise perfect

armin wears a cheap casio digital watch

armin really hates that he’s seen as cute and sweet and not hot by most people. he feels this especially when he’s at a party or event with eren and jean.

black chuck taylors are his every day shoe, they’re very worn but still very clean

armin needs his glasses to function optimally, but he’s not helpless without them.

armin loves biology and all of its subjects, but marine biology and the ocean have his heart

despite his low self esteem and saint-like patience, he refuses to let people treat him like a doormat.

armin is everyone’s friend, but naturally eren and mikasa are his best friends. jean is close though!

he likes to do his own thing in social situations, but after a few drinks he’s a social butterfly

armin wears a silver ring on his left middle finger and a silver charm style bracelet with his watch.

he drives a dark blue 1991 mazda rx7. it belonged to his father once, and he fixed it up to mechanical and aesthetic perfection with eren and connie’s help.

i’m really not sorry, he’s also bisexual.

armin is a huge eavesdropper

he has ONE very small tattoo of a star on the back of his arm, just above his elbow, courtesy of jean via connie’s amazon tattoo gun

he hates when people wallow in self pity, so he’s rather ashamed of his insecurity and low self esteem.

armin has lots of little moles, they’re everywhere. face-wise, he has one on his left cheek and to the left of his mouth!

armin is a super dry texter, texting him is literally like exchanging work emails. he does enjoy imessage games though

[tsutsumi-kurose]

Thoughts on chapter 120? Like Kou just died, Amane has been dead, who knows what will happen next

You know what I’m curious about

What Kou said about the house

That whoever is in it becomes servant to its whims

Who else do we know is part of the house

Tsukasa.

He’s dead now, but even before he was dead, he was part of it so that begs the question….

How in control is Tsukasa? If he is at all?

hiii thank you sm for the ask!! (and thank you for your patience!! life's been a little wild this week!)

heads up this post is. pretty long lol chapter 120 was such a trip!!

to address the biggest event first: I thought the tragedy was really beautifully done!! teru absolutely unraveling and giving up all pretense in a way we have never seen before… SO good, I’ve loved watching this arc tear him apart—he’s such a guarded and constructed character, I’ve loved the angst of seeing the neat threads of him pulled apart to reveal what’s inside (that feels mean but I promise it’s a compliment about how he’s written lol I just really love angst)

I think I have a lot of the same questions as you!! as for what happens next, they’ve resolved to turn back the clock, but they still haven’t figured out what changed. times running out!! how will they find out?

well, there is one way they know to get answers in this world (:

such a helpful little guy in every reality huh!! my favorite little lore keeper <333

I love the change of tsukasa-kun not granting any old wish but specifically only granting information. knowledge has been a really interesting theme this arc... I have especially loved how a lot of this arc hinges on how much our characters don't know---especially teru, as he typically is one of the more knowledgeable characters throughout the series. (sorry i'm really delighting in his pain in the post lmao it's just that it's fascinating to see characters get the floor swept out from under them, seeing what breaks them, etc).

this difference in the timeline really highlights sources of knowledge/knowledge systems... which is think also relates to the clock keepers... knowing what they wanted to change and how to change it but no one else knows... the minamoto family having information or not having it and withholding it and from who... teru feeling powerless in this timeline bc he doesn't have knowledge and power to have the sort of control he normally has over supernatural situations... knowledge as power/power belonging to those with knowledge/knowledge as something owned and dispensed by those with power... really interesting themes this arc!!

in terms of figuring out how to get back before time runs out, i wonder if teru could stand to get information through this tsukasa-kun if it was for kou? does he have the skill and power to go against this iteration of the well god and get answers his own way? how will he cope with his loss of control now that it's caused him the greatest loss he could suffer? i honestly can't say i have any predictions there, but i'm very excited to find out!!

thinking about knowledge/lore keepers also makes me think about natsuhiko and sakura… telling kou how a human can become a supernatural, telling yashiro about tsukasa being hanako’s yorishiro and about her lifespan… thinking about knowledge as a theme this arc really makes me wonder where they are and what they know

but to stay on track with the ask lol: wrt what the clock keepers changed, I’m even more convinced after the 120 color spread that it has to do with amane changing the past 1968, though I have no idea what he changed or why. but i am thinking a lot about this interaction in 111:

hanako is still very much holding his knife up to kako---protecting tsukasa!!!---after kako says to dispose of tsukasa!! meanwhile, kako's eye seems to say halt---there seems to be something additional/different happening there. the circular lens framing of that panel of tsukasa also suggests that's from the pov of kako's eye specifically. when akane asks "is that all you wanted to say?" do we really know what it is that kako said? hanako's wide eyed "huh?" seems like it's a totally different reaction than the face he makes right above while wielding his knife, but we don't really see anything new between these panels, besides them looking intently at each other. does kako have some sort of way to control people into changing the past, I wonder? can he see someone's past, but only with enough information, maybe? did something happen to amane the first time he messed with the big clock back in 1968 that kako can sense here? at this stage, all this analysis has given me is more questions lol

to respond to your final question: tsukasa!!! tsukasa and how much autonomy he has!! perhaps my favorite tbhk mystery to ponder <3

i am a long time believer that tsukasa is tsukasa... and upon first reading, this arc strengthened that belief. but i gotta admit, the more i think about it, the more i realize there are definitely some arguments to be made about the status of our regularly scheduled tsukasa! i think the main things this arc has given us to consider regarding this mystery are: 1) the possessions feel very different here than the possessions in the original timeline; and 2) we start to see the god have more of a personality in this arc.

please join me on my thought spiral lol

the first difference we see this arc is that tsukasa-kun seems so not in control as compared to original timeline tsukasa, which makes him seem more possessed. most prominently in this arc, I think tsukasa-kun’s little moment of calling out for amane while wandering around the school portrayed him as much less in control than the tsukasa we know.

and 120 certainly seems to have confirmed that in the new timeline, possession is largely in the well god's hands, and something that the possessed person has no control over; amane seems to be violently possessed, then seems to forget anything ever happened once he's not being actively possessed.

to get back to the question of agency: the change in amane's demeanor and who's in control has been shown very starkly through the color of his eyes this arc. the changes are incredibly abrupt.

in contrast, original timeline tsukasa's eyes slide easily between black and gold---he carries on conversations, making one consistent point as his eyes change back and forth.

this would seeeeem to suggest original tsukasa has more control than this amane, and is therefore more himself

but kou's eyes weren't black either when he led nene to adult amane... why does kou's possession slide in and out, whereas amane's is so stark? and what does this mean for our original tsukasa, who seems so seamless?

though kou’s is still different from original tsukasa’s possession, as kou very visibly broke out of it because he heard nene calling for help? (maybe there's something to be said there about love and familiarity and its power, even if temporary.) kou’s possession felt somewhere between the abruptness of amane’s possession and the seamlessness of original tsukasa’s eyes shifting.

which… could suggest either that original tsukasa has agency, since he doesn’t seem to ever be fighting against possession or snapping out of anything. but, to argue the other point, it could also mean he’s so wholly controlled that he can’t fight against it or snap out of it. (which I don’t necessarily believe, for reasons I’ll get to in a bit!!)

the extent of the god's control this arc is also really interesting to think about considering possessed amane just... watches kou whisk nene away

this panel is so haunting. who's in there? is it the well god? it would seem so, as there are no bags under amane's eyes when he comes back to himself. so then is this the well god's expression? doesn't it look... tired? it just watches them run off. maybe because it knows it still has control over kou. but that doesn't explain the fatigued expression. it's so hard to read!! somewhat sad, somewhat... curious, maybe?

which raises questions about the well god having more personality this arc. I could be forgetting smth, but i don’t think we’ve seen it say too much before this other than the deals it made with original tsukasa, but it gets to express itself a bit more this chapter!! and i think there are a lot of similarities to tsukasa that may raise concerns about the agency of original tsukasa… but i think there are differences as well!!

the laughter in response to distress and the fact that the god asks a lot of questions do admittedly feel pretty similar to tsukasa:

i have considered that the god acting independently in a way that original tsukasa acts could indicate that tsukasa's personality is the god's, but if you consider the timeline, i think it's actually the other way around!

in this timeline, it seems like tsukasa still sacrificed himself for amane, which would mean that the god still learned its speech patterns by copying tsukasa when he started talking to it under the house, which confuses their similarities right off the bat! the well god is made of tsukasa, the well god learned to articulate itself through tsukasa.

we see tsukasa acting this way in the red house, before going back, when he has the god in his chest but can have a conversation with it. this behavior is also in line with tsukasa saying "yay!" and smiling brightly when amane says he loves him, even though we know tsukasa still thought amane hated him, despite him saying he loved him.

i also think there are differences in personality between original tsukasa and the god we see here!

their philosophies and goals seem different to me. “this is happiness” and “join the land of the gods” feels very different from “I like the look on people’s faces when they stop holding back” and “if something as simple as [humans and supernaturals mixing] is enough to break the world, it should be broken”… the god seems to exert authority over a taking or transfer, with a definitive ddestination and answer, whereas tsukasa's beliefs seem more in line with a smashing of any such boundaries or authority. wondering what would happen if the clock were to be “blown to smithereens” is very tsukasa, whereas things seem to have an order in this red house ritual… there's just something very one track and surreptitious about the way the well god seems to be operating here that feels at odds with tsukasa's beliefs and methods to me.

there’s also something to be said about tsukasa’s investment in emotional honesty vs a god that takes over people and decides what their emotions are for them. "this is happiness" and "are you happy to see me?" feel very opposed to each other!! tsukasa just seems so much more genuine in the questions he asks. what about what nene wants? so? how are you feeling? are you... happy to see me? do you think amane's gonna come? do you love your mommy, kou? more than nene chan? amane, do you… love me? so many questions!! they just seem so much more open-ended and prompt so much more than the god saying "this is happiness" and deciding that for everyone.

and asking questions is a habit tsukasa had before leaving the red house, even before sacrificing himself: he asks the god if it wants rice then asks if it wants a frog; he asks amane what wish he wants granted; he wonders how amane will kill him! he's always been really curious, and we see that in original tsukasa as well: he wonders what the inside of the supernatrual fish looks like, he wonders what it would be like to make an artificial human, he wants to know if akane has gears inside him too... an endless well (pardon the pun) of curiosity!!

the god, on the other hand, seems at this point to just want to pull people into the well, and has not shown any visible interest thus far in who those people are or any details about them, or any interest in life beyond the well. it makes a blanket statement about everyone wanting happiness and decides what that means. not very curious!!

tsukasa is also very willing to answer questions, without a price! which is different from the god taking people in exchange for answers! tsukasa very openly answers kou's question about his wish in 77-78 without asking for anything in return. tsukasa also stays where amane wants him in 111 despite definitely being able to overpower him, and (in my personal reading) does his best to hear amane out about why he's stopping him. tsukasa seems much more willing to communicate and converse that this god possessing people and telling them what happiness is and leveraging information.

something i'm also having half formed thoughts about is the fact that tsukasa couldn’t grant ghost mitsuba’s wish until it was less vague, whereas the entity seems to be deciding the meaning of the vague wish for happiness. also who even wished for that. they couldn’t have all wished for that. well god, who are you talking to?? who all wished to be happy and when?? what are you referring to?? cite your sources?? (also raises the question: what conversations has this god heard and how?? but that's a little off topic rn lol)

so, i think tsukasa is much more open and doesn't seem to want authority in the way the god appears to. sure, he definitely has a bit of a streak with giving orders---to sakura, and mitsuba, and nene, to name a few---but i think he's much more receptive to freedom and the breaking of rules, whereas the god seems to have one idea of what is good and isn't interested in any outside input, nor in sharing its ideas or doing anything in conversation. he also seems to be genuinely trying to grant sakura's wish as far as i can tell!! whereas nothing has suggested the god is taking other people's wants and wishes into consideration, at least not in any genuine sort of way.

so while tsukasa and the god definitely have some similarities, i think they have enough differences to suggest they each have their own minds and personalities and agency. i'm still of the belief that original tsukasa is tsukasa!

to dig a little deeper into the what has been revealed about the well god this chapter: while i think the well god is authoritative and acts in its own self interest, i kinda can't help but feel a little sympathy for it... the way it watches kou carry nene off, the way tsukasa-kun makes deal in exchange for people spending time with him, the way the people the red house takes never leave---the god doesn't seem to do anything with them, it just seems to keep them there. doesn't this all make the well god seem lonely?

i've said before that i think original tsukasa's shifting eye colors seem to indicate more emotional and mental shifts than possession/control shifts, which could raise interesting questions about the emotional core of this god...

this may also be a piece in the puzzle explaining what made original tsukasa so special: why he was the only one who got out of the kannagi cavern, why he had the autonomy to tell the god he was going back home without asking permission… he's god's favorite!! lol and i've always wondered why!! (i mean he's my favorite too so i get it---but lore reasons lol). could tsukasa be special to the god because tsukasa chose to be with the god?

one last thought i have right now is that I also think original tsukasa’s emotional investment in hanako and nene hints at him being himself, bc I don’t see why the god would be so invested in those two specifically? if original tsukasa is wholly possessed, what reason does the god have to shower amane in so much love every time he sees him? that feels different than a learned speech pattern, and even if the god has tsukasa's memories, it doesn't seem in line with what we see of the god here to jump at amane and hug him whenever he sees him--actions like that feel very singularly motivated by tsukasa's feelings. there is, of course, the possibility that if the god took over tsukasa, he was affected by his feelings, but at that point, isn't the god more tsukasa than tsukasa is the god? if the god is possessing tsukasa but has been made to have tsukasa's personality and act on tsukasa's feelings...isn't tsukasa arguably the one in control? where does the difference lie? what tips the scales?

maybe the biggest question re: tsukasa's agency will be... how much of tsukasa is the god, and how much of the god is tsukasa? though at this point, i do still personally view it as a partnership.

anyway, i leave you with my favorite panel, which haunts me in new and exciting ways every time i think about this:

[mangocurist]

toxic codependent yaoi i love you toxic codependent yaoi save me

this is based off of @pancake-x2's idea of the uu!director being wifrot (as a unit)... its soooo good im like. frothing at the mouth thinking about it. ARGHH pulls my hair out in clumps I need them to Kill each Other and Make Out about it

ﮩ٨ـﮩﮩ٨ـــــــــﮩ٨ـﮩﮩ٨ـﮩ٨ـﮩﮩ٨ـ♡ﮩ٨ـﮩﮩ٨ـﮩ٨ـﮩﮩـــــﮩ٨ـﮩﮩ٨ـﮩ٨ـﮩﮩ٨ـ♡ﮩ٨ـﮩﮩ٨ـﮩ٨ـﮩـــــﮩ٨ـﮩﮩ٨ـﮩ٨ـﮩﮩ٨ـــﮩ

If there was any one thing that someone needed to know about Parrot, Wifies would tell them this: he is a difficult man to keep chained down.

Now, don’t get him wrong— Wifies doesn’t enjoy having to force his partner in crime to stay put in one place— it’s clear that Parrot wants to stretch his wings and explore the server, fool around with the pawns they’ve taken such great lengths to acquire and just generally find the workings of this server and break it apart at its seams. 

It’s simply his nature as a free spirit, and Wifies understands that he must feel restrained, cooped up in this sterile lab with nothing for company but himself and the countless experiments Wifies checks on daily. 

Even besides his natural need to explore, Unstable is a much different place from Parrot’s home server of Lifesteal, and Wifies can’t imagine what going from a place like Lifesteal, where death is not only not permanent but in fact infinitely avoidable so long as you have the smarts to evade and steal from others, to Unstable, where everyone watches their backs with caution knowing that the moment they turn around they risk never moving again would be like. 

To Wifies, it’s much the same as having brought a wild animal into a supervised environment: unless they are broken and beaten down, it is difficult to ever fully rid of their innate desire for freedom.

An animal’s first instinct, when trapped in a difficult situation, is to flee.

But while he needs Parrot’s… wild nature, so to say, present to fully carry out their purpose on this server, Wifies cannot possibly risk setting Parrot free to wreak havoc on Unstable. It would simply be too large a risk, and he— they, the Director— does not take risks. Not unless they know they can win.

Which they can, as long as Parrot does not leave the cage Wifies has placed him in.

Parrot, for his part, knows this, and he complies well. Wifies is honestly impressed at the restraint Parrot shows— his partner's patience is certainly not mirrored in his doppelganger, a little bird too curious for its own good. Then again, maybe it is one of those differences that come from the man’s time spent on Lifesteal that allow him to keep his cool where the other Parrot would have leapt ahead, adrenaline rushing through his blood and rendering his critical thinking useless. 

His willingness to wait for the perfect moment to strike was what made him such a good predator on Lifesteal, and here… it made him the perfect second half for the Director's scheme.

Wifies only hopes that he doesn't see a day where that shrewd planning decides to weave its own web to trap him in.

“You know, he's not taking your clone's death very well.” A voice comes from behind him, before the familiar feeling of two large wings come to drape on Wifies’ shoulders, Parrot leaning over him to look up at the large split-screen monitor. “Did you know? Ash told me that he hallucinated the guy. Almost makes you feel bad for them, doesn't it?”

“If this is you trying to convince me to let you out to further toy with them, you should rethink it. We’re almost at the finish line— what will this do for us but cause more unnecessary problems?” 

Parrot rolls his eyes, but sits down by Wifies’ side anyway, resigned to watching Wifies pick through the live footage of server members. As a reward, Wifies’ hand comes up to prune through the man’s feathers, dragging them down between the clumps of half-plucked molt and dust from god-knows-where, considering he's been cooped up in the lab for his entire time on the server. And they're in the End right now— Wifies doesn't even want to consider what exactly Parrot could have dirtied himself with.

“Can you go a little high– uh, yeah, that’s good,” Parrot hums as he leans back into Wifies’ touch, avian traits on full display as he calms down. 

Wifies is glad for it. It’s a show of trust, something he needs from Parrot if they are to work through this together. And— this part is admittedly perhaps a bit of his own selfish desire, too– but he enjoys having the other man around. At least, he likes Parrot's company over Ashswag’s, or ItzRealMe— or even the latest lineup in their little assassin rotation, though Wifies is being honest when he admits that Cube may be the most tolerable they've yet to contact.

Speaking of.

“Have you met with Cube yet?” Parrot is usually the one to make the trip around to their contacts, on account of the fact that he can fight and prepare for traps much better than Wifies can. It is the most logical solution Wifies can think of: Parrot needs to get out, and he is intimately familiar with treachery and bloodshed— far more so than the scientist who keeps himself locked up all day surrounded with machines and only nearly organic clones. If anyone gets the wrong idea, Parrot is the one who will be able to fend them off.

He held the title of admin for four years, after all. That was as good a reason as any to prove his ability.

“Yeah. He agreed— because he had to, mostly, but I think he thought it'd be funny to fuck with Parrot 2.” Parrot hums at a scratch to his ear-wings, making the smaller appendages flap with excitement. “He's apparently decided that he'll trap their base to kill the guy.”

Wifies twists his head to look at the content avian, hand pausing momentarily in its ministrations. Parrot frowns, but he doesn’t say anything. “Do you think that'll be enough?”

“Hell no,” Parrot scoffs. “I'm not stupid. No matter which ‘me’ is being trapped, I'll find my way out eventually. Cube is good, but not good enough.”

“It's unfortunate that most of these assassins only focus on one core specialty,” Wifies agrees. “I’d like if we could find one that would be able to account for all their weaknesses at once, but that’s practically impossible to come by.” 

“You could just make one yourself,” Parrot suggests, and while Wifies gives the suggestion some consideration, he waves it away.

“I don’t have the ability to do that just yet. I mean… look at my current creation,” he scoffs as the screen shifts to a replay of his clone and Parrot’s doppelganger’s odyssey. “He’s as dumb as a brick. Doesn’t understand anything besides how to dog the footsteps of his betters. I sometimes wonder if I made a mutt instead of a human. Surely there were better options for Kenadian to introduce sentience to?” 

“You’re way too hard on him. Honestly, I think I prefer your clone over mine. Actually— no, I know I prefer your clone over mine.” Parrot’s frown grows deeper as he witnesses the way his doppelganger addresses the clone, posture growing more and more rigid and disturbed as his foot starts to tap incessantly against the floor. Wifies runs his hand through his wings again, and when that doesn’t work, he moves to start braiding Parrot’s hair with one hand. The action manages to calm him, but it probably won’t last for too long if they focus on his mirror image.

Wifies does understand, much as he wishes he doesn’t. “Well, there is no bigger critic than the artist themselves.” 

“Yeah, I guess.” Parrot sighs, wings coming up to drape over Wifies’ shoulders again as he rests his chin on Wifies’ head. “Oh, we should go and take a look at how they’re doing now. I mean. How he’s doing. Sorry. Almost forgot that there’s only one exception now— in your words, of course.” 

“You’re sounding rather vindictive for a man who prefers loyalty over action.” 

“I just hate that version of me. It’s not that I don’t understand what he’s doing, I just don’t like that he’s doing it with my face.”

Wifies shakes his head, amused. With the click of a button, Parrot appears— the other one, the one with half-pruned wings by a clone who shouldn't have lived long enough to assist him and yin-yang symbols carved into his heart, inextricably connected to his very being— staring at the white wall of Leowook’s newest base, eyes red with what could be insomnia but is more likely the product of his unfortunate attachment to one of Wifies’ failed products.

“Is there a reason you wanted to check up on him? He isn’t doing much,” Wifies points out, eyes drifting over to study Parrot’s face. There’s dust from whatever he was doing before scattered on his face as well, and he scoots over just slightly to rub the spots of dust off the man’s face, making Parrot’s wings flutter slightly. 

“I wanted to suggest something.” 

Wifies turns to look at Parrot, frowning. “If you say—”

“I won’t leave.” Parrot crosses his arms. “I know how you get about seeing this whole thing come to an end, and I’m not going to ruin it just because I want to get out. Which— yeah, okay, I do, you know I do, but I’m not going to do it right now because we need to see this to the end together.”

Wifies turns to study the man. His wings have retracted, lying flat and tense on his back. His eyes are trained on Wifies’ own, staring as if waiting for Wifies’ approval. It’s an unsettlingly intense stare, one that he doesn’t associate with Parrot often— unless he’s looking to get something out of someone.

Even now, it is difficult to trust that Parrot believes what he is saying.

In a life or death situation, the animal will choose self-preservation over aiding its companion.

Still. He needs him. Wifies needs Parrot, and whether that will spell the downfall of the Director is something that he will ignore for the time being, if only to allow himself to indulge in an illusion for a little while longer.

If he needs to clip his bird’s wings, then so be it.

“...Go on, then.” Wifies says after a beat of time passes. “What is it?” 

A smile curls on the edge of Parrot’s mouth. 

“I don’t think he knows to just what extent we’re willing to go. Why don’t we show him how far the limit really is?”

[faecaribou]

i love to dissect differences in relationships in blu and red teams. scout edition because i only gaf about him sorry lol

Scout and Spy

Blu Spy, Blu Scout: healthy father son relationship. well as healthy as it gets for a spy and a scout lol so still not great but they are capable of telling each other they care. Blu Spy is very careful about never showing any ounce of affection on the battlefield so Scout can't rely for help from Spy like that but off-field he goes to Spy for any and all advice, usually emotional advice.

Blu Spy Red Scout: blu spy is a major dick to him

Red Spy Red Scout: unhealthy father son relationship. spy might help out his son but they will beat the shit out of each other every step of the way. projecting their own self loathing at each other which leads to them being shitty to each other which is just. its a endless feedback loop but sometimes in the evening Spy is feeling particularly nostalgic and Scout needs advice and well. come on into the smoking room, Scout, I'll help. And if Red Scout is in a jam on the battlefield, well. Spy promised his mother he'd look out for Jeremy. But if he can get away without Scout even knowing who helped, that'd be great.

Red Spy Blu Scout: red spy does not have any particular hatred for this member of the blu team. He is jealous of the blu spy and scout relationship, you think he wouldn't pick up on it despite blu spy trying to hide it? haha. he doesnt target the blu scout at all even if he's jealous because he doesn't want blu spy 'randomly' deciding to focus on him all game. like red spy wouldnt do the same if someone targeted red scout, puh-lease

Scout and Medic

Red Medic Red Scout: two people who cannot stfu but neither wants to listen to the other so they dont bond over this but they're still cool. If I'm allowed to feel a little shippy I'd even add that Medic appreciates Scouts legs ^w^ and Scout is like "BOOBA" but Medic is exasperated by Scout's constant injuries though he WILL heal him. Scout is terrified of Medic's unnecessary experiments but if Medic is like "this is necessary and here's why" then Scout WILL sign up pretty quickly, he was second to get the uberheart after all. Medic appreciates that even if he's annoyed that when it comes to needles Scout will run.

Red Medic Blu Scout: blu scout is going to get tortured to death

Blu Medic Blu Scout: EMESIS BLU. if no EB then Medic alternates rapidly between distancing himself from Scout and smothering him. He doesn't want to care for his team but he does and so he keeps doing this hot-cold thing that drives Scout nuts, and if Scout is injured then Medic is definitely overbearing until he's healed in which case then he's getting yelled at and violently kicked out of medbay.

Blu Medic Red Scout: EB-wise I see Blu medic trying to replace his missing scout with this guy :( non-EB wise i feel like scout loves to kill this guy so that he can brag and thus blu medic does NOT care for him. he wants to sic Heavy on Red Scout sooo bad

Scout and Heavy

Red Heavy Red Scout: Older brother vibes to Scout but Scout highkey takes it for granted because hes so used to having older brothers. he harasses the shit outta this old man be nice scout >:( Heavy in exchange has wayyyyy too much patience for Scout because of his younger sisters. Though sometimes Scout will say something so jarring that Heavy remembers that Scout is in fact, not his little sister, and actually get mad, in which case Scout will back off immediately because ohhh fuck i angered the big guy. Scout's older brothers are pretty hot-headed, he knows when he actually needs to back off or get strangled, though he frequently toes that line too far

Red Heavy Blu Scout: never thought about this dynamic even once in my life tbh. standard rival team neutrality

Blu Heavy Red Scout: Scout i swear to god leave him alone stop killing him for sandwiches. one day Heavy is going to snap and when ubercharged he's going to beat the shit out of Scout and Medic won't be able to decide whether this is the best thing ever or mad at a wasted ubercharge but after that incident Scout will cool it a little

Blu Heavy Blu Scout: same as red heavy red scout except blu scout is a bit quieter and thus bothers him less

Scout and Sniper

Red Sniper Red Scout: i am not a sniperscout shipper but i imagine that they have a level of broship here

Red Sniper Blu Scout: standard rivalry, i genuinely believe as a general rule cross faction-wise that snipers are too busy dealing with spies or being jumped by a particularly irate Demo or Soldier to super care about Scouts on the battlefield. Scouts are like "MAN I HATE HEADSHOTS" because they hate all forms of dying but besides the random running up to the roost to bash a head in there's not much going on

Blu Sniper Red Scout: i seen this as a cross factional rival turned romance before and sure i guess

Blu Sniper Blu Scout: sniper is physically around the blu team more than red sniper but he is just as quiet, if not moreso so i think they just got a coworker thing going on here. blu scout has a significantly more protective father (or it just appears this way since blu spy is more vocal about it) so god forbid blu sniper makes any sort of move on scout ship speaking

Scout and Demo

Red Demo Red Scout: Scout doesn't care much for Demo unless Demo's breaking out the drinks and sharing. He's a teammate, he's nice, but he's hard for Scout to understand with the slurring and the accent and they don't have a lot of mutual interests. Explosions are fun but Demo's not going to set off explosions willy-nilly in the backyard so how much fun CAN he be. Likewise, Demo thinks Scout is a good kid but a tad annoying, definitely annoying younger brother vibes. Fond but not spending hours of his time with him

Red Demo Blu Scout: Run by each other. Kills them. Keeps running. Demo has bigger fish to fry and Scout likes to think he does too

Blu Demo Red Scout: About the same except I like to think Blu Demo is a little less jovial than Red Scout so a little more serious. Maybe a little more tense than the other dynamic but still the same.

Blu Demo Blu Scout: Blu Scout is juuuuust quieter than Red Scout so these two are less likely to fight than Red Demo and Red Scout, but somehow the red ones are closer to each other than these two. Blu Demo does not like sharing his alcohol with someone who has just horrible alcohol tolerance, Scout can achieve the same effect just drinking the blu beer

Scout and Soldier

Red Scout Red Soldier: They rough-house a LOT because they both consider themselves to be the best offensive class and they're both very hot-headed and prone to physical violence. The longer they've known each other, the less likely they're seriously injuring each other or sending each other to respawn while rough-housing. Soldier tries to dad scout but its so bad that literally no one realizes this is what he's doing. "let's go fishing scout!" Scout returns from this trip soaking wet, bleeding, one fish caught but he still doesnt know how to fish, which was the whole reason why soldier dragged him along, and now scout hates fishing. soldier thinks he did a job well done but he didnt

Red Scout Blu Soldier: bruhhhhh i hate fighting enemy soldiers-I MEAN SCOUT HATES IT whats the point of running fast if this asshole is going to fall out of the sky with a rocket. Scout hates this guy and while Soldier hates him back its more of a "I hate all Reds" than personal. It's personal to Scout.

Blu Scout Red Soldier: Blu Scout's a little more nervous about 1v1ing Red Soldier, which is fair because if he kills red soldier the guy will probably forget his original objective and spend the rest of the match trying to hunt him down and repeatedly kill him. like sure he'll forget by next fight but Blu Scout'll spend THIS fight miserable. Again, it's more personal to Scout than it is to Soldier

Blu Scout Blu Soldier: Soldier is definitely the leader of the offense team and he runs them to the ground making them train. Blu Soldier's easier for Scout to approach when it comes to emotional problems, and might be in his top 3 to go for advice, but its a very reluctant and grudging bond they have. The only rough-housing they have is on the wrestling mat.

Scout and Pyro

Red Pyro Red Scout: scared of pyro at first but eventually they becomes friends. they both like to draw, Pyro will pretend to like baseball (he's just waiting for his turn for the tv), and they both enjoy explosions. they're buddies

Red Pyro Blu Scout: Pyro is so scary to him. Also he's afraid of burning alive. Pyro of course does not have opinions on anything about the enemy team because as far as he's concerned he's giving lollipops to babies. If Scout knew about Pyrovision he'd only be more scared

Blu Pyro Red Scout: Also terrified of the enemy Pyro but he's so convinced red spy would mock him over his fear that he just keeps getting burnt up again and again until its less about fear of burning alive as it is just fear of Pyro

Blu Pyro Blu Scout: They bond because they suffer together under Blu Soldier's makeshift boot camp but Blu Pyro enjoys being outdoors more than Red Pyro (outdoor fires vs indoor fires preferences) so they're not as close as the reds because they dont necessary draw together or watch tv together

Scout and Engineer

Red Engineer Red Scout: yes yes we know. daddy issues Scout paired with "calls him son" Engineer. Scout goes to Engineer if Spy is too busy for advice, or to complain about Spy to Engie. Engie's work has juuust enough lack of explosions that he doesn't usually mess with Engineer's things and thus is allowed to be in the workshop, provided he still doesn't touch anything. If Scout touches anything that's a whole week banned from the workshop, and yes Engineer will hide in the workshop to hide from Scout during that week because Scout has perfected a quiet, insecure regret that will make Engineer break and they both know it. Engineer wishes he had a son I know it and he is taking that out on Scout

Red Engineer Blu Scout: Scout hates sentries but tf is he gonna do about it lolololol get fucked little guy. He never gets close enough to Engie to be a problem so Engie doesnt even care

Blu Engineer Red Scout: same thing honestly except Scout thinks Blu Engineer is a little scary when mad about sapped sentries so he just runs past the guy with only a few scattered shots at him. He shoots at the guy but he's not sticking around for a proper fight

Blu Engineer Blu Scout: doesnt have as much daddy issues as Red Scout but Blu Scout either goes to Blu Engie or Blu Solly if his dad is busy. He knows juuuust a little bit of knowledge where sometimes if Blu Engineer is in a good mood he'll let Scout sit next to him and hand him the tools he asks for. Blu Engineer is more for practical problems than emotional ones so they aren't quite as close as the red ones, and after the first year or so Blu Scout isn't causing any explosions in the workshop... on purpose

[verdantlights]

SON OF ARES

INZO

INFO:

He/him/It/its, AMAB

Human

6'4" and 210lbs

Owner is Scistrae

Brand is across his chest above his heart

TRIVIA:

He is the youngest sibling to Vant's family of Tov, Wren, and Cato. And he lucked out with the best genes /silly

Is aware it and Cato are brothers. Doesn't know about Wren and Tov..................yet.

Has an odd relationship with Demi (read: situgaytionship)

Autistic

It has the same owner as Toki. No it does not know about Toki, but Scistrae loves Inzo a lot more than Toki.

He is a fucking UNIT. and he makes sure everyone fucking knows this because he FIGHTS.

The Crashout™ of Season 41.

Always collared and has been locked up Till Style on multiple occasions.

He fights due to immense anger issues caused by severe emotional regulation (autm,,...autmim...)

He finds fighting to be a good outlet and loves it more than anything, honestly. He's the type of guy to have fun and laugh while throwing punches. Like fighting is a game.

Demi is it's favorite opponent. its very homoerotic

Actually pretty chill outside of it's temper. It may get worked up easily and have very low patience, but people around it have learned to just... not rile him up. Which is actually really easy to do.

So he's just a guy more often than not.

He is a jersey type beat. just. full stop. he is the jersey beat period.

Fighting is a dance form to him.

Types of fighting include whatever the fuck he got from reading books. More often than not, it's martial arts. This is because martial arts are written down a lot more than something like boxing. so theres no specific art he's a master of, its just a mix of a bunch of things hes read about

A massive fucking math nerd. He loves math and numbers. Finds itself counting a lot and solving problems in his head almost as a form of stimming.

That was the other thing, fighting is like stimming to him LMAO. i mean it has to be if its what helps him regulate his anger.

It has vitiligo, obviously, but it's genetically modified to be more randomized instead of in usual spots (hands, around the eyes, around the mouth, etc etc.) and is also a combination of both scalp and skin vitiligo. I don't remember the names of the specifics, but I know that they are separate and it's very rare to be born with both. But..... Inzo has both.

Idk man he's so pretty i love it so much im so proud of it.ahhagagdhf

OTHER:

gaybyoy.

his genetics in general are pretty rare considering his eyes are a lightish green.

inzo being siblings with tov, wren, and cato was completely like. vant offhandedly mentioned that because of the vitiligo and autism, inzo could totally be a part of the family and im like hell fucking yeah.

cryinrg this is so funny to me

im gonna be so honest i kept forgetting to do this so im so sorry that it looks like ass. im focused on a lot of different things at once,,, euueueue

Demi belongs to @lulling-riot / @/alien-til-i-stage gay gay homosexual gay

Tov, Wren, and Cato belong to @ivanttakethis hi vant ily vant

@apple8ees @chevalperd @bluemoonscape @rockwgooglyeyes @apriciticreveries @junebluues @awaggaa @messengers-of-the-gods @friedclownshrimp @starry-skiez @yunoftheclouds

my brain is hurting too much i mightve forgotten to tag someone,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

also me when i lie

[canisbrutus]

hii if your reqs are still open, i like ur headcanons very much and do u perhaps have any on wade? i barely see content of him and hes a mess of a guy.. .. . .

awh ty ty! Yeah that boy. hooh. Somebody get him a sandwich.

CW: mentions of child abuse and alcoholism. obviously.

Wade Martin 💣

The Basics:

inhales.

so as you know he's got a shit relationship with his dad.

gets allllll his aggression from him.

his mom left the picture and took his sister christy with her maybe ~3 years prior to ingame events.

being under that roof alone with him. its certainly shaped this boy.

him and his father are what the preps and many of the 'financially superior' would call: trailer trash. or white trash.

no prospects, no hope, no future, just another bluecollar jackass.

such a bleak scene doesnt foster any form of academic success.

to say he struggled in school is an understatement. and of course, he certainly didnt have any help at home.

only his friends, tom, trent, etc, in the same shit boat he was in, agreed: school sucked ass.

at least he had them. they were all he had.

Expanded Lores:

to understand wade, we must first take a look at his father.

and boy, what a piece of work he is.

yes that man currently owns? a seafood restaurant. but earlier in life his real passion was boxing.

heavyweight champion before he had a seizure on the mat.

but that Fight never left him.

he never raised a fist against his children while his wife was around. but after she left and his drinking problem got worse?

well. wade picked up some moves from him too.

wade's father didnt have any patience for such a disappointment after life fucked him over so much already.

but hey at least he's got his buddies he cracks skulls with.

all the bullies are like pack bonded tbh. yeah they're hooligans but they're very ride or die together. loyal to the end.

bc god knows they aint got anyone else.

even his sister doesnt really like him. yeah she'll giggle at the stunts he pulls, but he's a bit too... i unno Gross for her tastes.

that typical teenage hormone fueled 'uhhhhh girlllllls' source of serotonin he's hooked on.

but again, at least he has his own 'brotherhood' he fraternizes with.

like rebels, or perhaps greek soldiers.

yeah he's a fan of those mythologies. histories. achilles, perseus, heracles, etc.

are him and his bully boys just as faggy as the greeks?

idk man what goes on in the trenches stays in the trenches.

Anyway

this boy has a severe insectophobia. stemming from a rather unpleasant infestation at home.

it is a Blessing his father doesnt actually do any of the cooking at the restaurant.

for ages they've battled against the three menaces: ants, flies, and worst of all fuckin german cockroaches.

many a night has wade woken up to something or several somethings crawling on him.

at least bullworth only has rats. in the dorms, anyway.

the kitchen is a different story of course and he doesnt trust anything in it. which is justified.

moving on his favorite victims are donald bucky and constantinos respectively.

typically he gets the latter to do his homework. which doesnt always turn out well for him.

his grades have not improved in the slightest but at least he has more time to dick around.

he drinks sometimes but he doesnt really like it. if anything it just makes him miserable because it makes him feel even more stupid.

he's pretty fuckin depressed at heart he just hides it behind his fists most of the time.

he's a jackass that's just tired of all the bullshit in his life. who knows maybe he wishes they'd take him away from his dad if he acts up enough.

maybe then his mom would stop harping on him so much if it means having him back. maybe she'd regret leaving him behind.

maybe then his father would regret what he's done and start Loving Him again.

hey is it just me or are these starting to look more like character analyses than hc dumps. well whatever you wanna call em i like writing em.

requests are still open lalala

[hc masterpost link]