#King University Bible and Religion

[machinesonix]

Somehow I have made it this long without realizing that none of the screen adoptions of Dune so much as mention the Butlerian Jihad. Like I guess it's burned into my brain so hard I sort of assumed it was part and parcel of the universe. Don't get me wrong, I think that's probably the first thing you learn if you want to dive deeper into the setting, but it still hits me like if the LotR movies showed us the big flaming eyeball tower and was like ‘Oh, that's why there are bad things, but don't worry, that's just background stuff.’ Yeah, you can understand the movie, but if the story is just like Frodo vs. The Witch King you are losing out on any of the conversation about the corruptive allure of power or theological undertones. So without further ado let's pretend this is for the benefit of interested new fans roped in by the movies and not part of my desperate attempt to silence the howling specters of literary analysis that live in my blood.

The Butlerian Jihad is an event set ~10k years prior to the events of Dune in which humanity won their freedom from the machines that they had enslaved themselves to. As a result, it is a religious taboo to create a machine that thinks like a human. That's frankly the bulk of the information presented by Frank Herbert in the text without dipping into books 7+, but whether or not those are canon is frankly an enormous can of worms, which really makes sense when you consider the size of the worms. But boy howdy, Frank loved his subtext and parallelism. Everyone has a foil character, every theme is hit from multiple angles, and Villinueve has been doing an excellent job of capturing a lot of that in repeated imagery and dialogue. The Butlerian Jihad happens off camera, but it's themes are absolutely critical to the big picture.

The Butlerian Jihad was a holy war. It was not merely a rebellion against the machines, it was a crusade against them. The prohibition against thinking machines isn't just a law, it's in the pan-universal Bible. Absolute psychopath Pieter DeVries himself claps back at the Baron for insinuating he might have a use for a computer, and this is a guy who has been hired specifically for his preternatural absence of morals. Let's hold onto that idea for a minute. 

Probably my favorite scene in the first book is the one where planetologist Liet-Kynes is dying out in the desert. As the last of his strength fades to dehydration he hallucinates conversations he had with his father concerning terraforming Arakkis for human habitability. He's told that the means are not complicated. There is already enough water on the planet, the Little Makers just have it all trapped deep underground as part of the sandworm reproductive cycle. You just need to isolate enough water to start irrigating plant life, and once it's established that'll keep the water on the surface on its own. The hard part is making sure everyone on the planet is environmentally conscious enough to foster a developing ecosystem. Nobody can drink any of that water while it's being collected, because they'll just introduce it back into the water cycle where the Little Makers are. It's going to take generations, so that sort of water discipline is going to have to go above and beyond a social convention. People need to be willing to die before they'll take a sip and compromise the plan. Ghost Dad Kynes concludes that the only mechanism in the human experience to enforce this consensus is religion. 

In the context of this whole parallelism thing, you have probably noticed that the Butlerian Jihad is not the only holy war in the narrative. Paul sees a new jihad as the only way of creating a future where humans can flourish. Now you might be saying ‘Wait now, Machines. I thought the point of Paul’s holy war was to avenge Leto and disempower established power structures by taking away the control of the spice!’ And you’d be right. The thing is, without getting into spoiler territory, Dune Messiah is not going to be about how everything just gets so much better now that Paul has destroyed the economy, government, and untold billions of human lives. This isn’t the endgame. Dude can see the future and the way he does it involves looking into the past. Paul lives in a society defined by a holy war and his goal is to redefine society. 

Putting it all together you can see what I mean about the Butlerian Jihad being essential to the themes even though the story never shows us a thinking machine or a narrative beat where the absence of computers changes the outcome. It helps us see the big picture. I���ve seen a lot of dialogue lately on whether Paul is a tragic hero or a consummate villain and I’m not here to answer that, but I am here to underline the critical detail. Paul intends to be seen as a tyrant. Just like Kynes’ hallucination says, religion is the lever to make a value stick around forever. He wants to traumatize humanity to hate chosen ones and emperors the same way the machines traumatized humanity to change them forever. The Water of Life ritual doesn’t invert his values, it lets him realize these visions of war are the means, not the ends. He is absolutely not happy about it, but this is Paul’s terrible purpose. 

[elbiotipo]

Are the Tres Reis Magos even saints or anything or did just go to heaven like normal christians. Were they even mages or do we just call them that for reasons?

Oh you have no idea how much lore these guys have.

Well, you should know by now that the Bible actually doesn't mention three wise kings (that's the English translation, I'm getting to that), it just mentions three wise men who came "from the east" to pay homage to baby Jesus, they saw a star that "stopped" over at Bethlehem. Traditionally, they're considered three because they brought three gifts; gold, myrrh and frankincense.

In Spanish they're called the "reyes magos" and the word "mago" here refers to "magi". Magus, mago, magi, it all has a root on the name for the priests of the Zoroastrian religion of Persia. The Bible uses this word for "wise people" in general, the implication is that even the wise astrologers of Persia paid homage to Jesus. I believe some said they were the first Christians even. The "kings" motif, however, does not appear in the Bible, it seems to be added later, for the prophecy that kings would kneel before Jesus. This actually happens elsewhere in the Bible, Emperor Cyrus is considered a wise man blessed by God, despite being Persian. The implication, I believe and this my personal interpretation, is that people from all over the world recognize the wisdom of God no matter their origin, that salvation has become universal.

And they are indeed saints, it was during the Middle Ages where the traditional names for them were made: Melchior, Gaspar and Balthazar. These come from later manuscripts, so they're non-canonical (in the literal sense), but they became really popular. Then lots of traditions came about these names, they were associated with different places... Melchior from Asia, Gaspar from Europe and Balthazar from Africa. In fact, Balthazar is very much venerated in African communities in Latin America (right next to me, for example). There were so many legends about them I can't really list them all, and this is only in the Latin American world, I think other churches have more.

There's also the story about the fourth Rey Mago, which my Dad told me, which goes something like this: he was going to see Jesus with the other three but delayed, and got lost. The gifts meant for Jesus he spent around helping other people. When he finally reaches Jesus, He's on the cross. He tells him that because he helped other people, he already paid homage to him. I think this comes from a modern novel published in 1895, but I have a feeling the story might be older as I'm sure my dad and grandparents didn't read it. There's also another tradition where the fourth Rey Mago is from America, but I haven't found much about that.

[thatchickwiththecamera]

If I'm There

This is from a request sent to me by @lma1986

Pairing: Noah Sebastian x Female Reader

TW: Death, Loss, Grief.  

Any and all feedback is appreciated!

Y/N groaned upon entering the hotel room and flung her body onto the crisply made king sized bed. The pelican case she had been holding was discarded somewhere along her journey. Noah, her boyfriend of two years, simply smiled at her antics as he rolled their remaining bags into the entryway. 

Noah’s band, Bad Omens, had just wrapped up their latest North American tour with a four day run of shows across central and eastern Canada. Y/N was a member of the band’s visuals team and worked as the lighting and video technician alongside Matt at Front of House. Her and Noah met four years ago when she was running visuals for one of the bands supporting Bad Omens on tour. 

Noah, Matt, and Nicholas liked her work and decided to extend an offer to join their growing team prior to the next tour. After two years of working with Bad Omens and two years of tip-toeing around shared feelings, Noah finally asked her on a date and as they say, the rest is history. 

With this tour coming to a close, it meant that they had the next two weeks off to do whatever they wanted before the guys had to be back in Los Angeles to finish tracking the new album. Everyone was scheduled to fly back to their respective home states at various times throughout the next day. While all of the gear was to be freighted back to the LA to either be stored in the warehouse until the next tour or to be moved into the awaiting studio space for recording. 

“I am so ready to sleep in my own bed,” She exclaimed, voice slightly muffled by the pillows. “I think the mattresses in the bunks are getting worse with each tour.”

“Either that or we’re just finally starting to feel older.” he said, flopping down next to her, “I mean, we are almost thirty.” 

“Don’t remind me.” She groans.

Before she can raise the question of who gets first dibs at the shower, she is interrupted by the familiar sound of her sister’s ringtone chirping from the phone in the front pocket of her hoodie. 

“Yellow!” She tiredly exclaims, placing the phone on speaker. 

“Y/N” the serious tone of her sister's voice cuts through the speaker. 

She immediately sits up and looks over at Noah, now sporting a concerned look on his face that she was sure matched her own. 

Her sister rarely called her by her first name. Mainly using childhood nicknames. Never her given name. 

“What’s wrong?” Y/N questions. 

“Y/N…it's Olivia.” Her sister continued, voice shaky. “There’s been an accident.”

She went on to explain that Olivia, Y/N’s best friend since as long as she could remember, had been hit head on by a drunk driver on her way home from dinner with friends from work. She had been rushed to the local trauma center where the medical team had managed to stabilize her but they stated that the next 24 hours were going to be critical. 

Noah was immediately on the phone with Matt, who five minutes later knocked on their door ready to drive them to the airport. 

The small airport chapel was dark and empty. The smell of incense lingered in the air from a Mass held earlier in the day. Y/N sat quietly in the last pew staring up at the large crucifix hanging on the wall above the altar and tabernacle. 

Despite eventually developing a vehement disinterest in organized religion as an adult, Y/N had been raised in the Bible Belt of the deep south and had grown up in and out of church as a child and young adult. She had witnessed and experienced enough over the course of her life that made her unable to completely let go of the notion that there was a greater power at play somewhere in the universe. 

Her grandmother always expressed belief in the power of prayer and when her usual sage advice fell on the deaf ears of a stubborn teenager, she always told Y/N to ultimately pray about it. 

“Give it up to God,” she would say, “Put it in his hands.” 

There were no direct flights out of Toronto, which left them stuck at JFK in New York City for the next three hours due to a layover. Noah’s many years on the road made it possible for him to sleep pretty much anywhere despite his tall frame. But her anxiety prevented her from finding any respite of sleep on the uncomfortable metal chairs outside the gate. 

Which is why she now found herself sitting in the Our Lady of the Skies chapel talking to a wooden crucifix. 

“I don’t know how to talk to you or if you even are actually there and listening,” She states, eyes stinging from the tears that threatened to form, “But at this point I’m desperate.”

“If there is one person in this lifetime that deserves to live a long and fulfilling life it is her,” she continued, “she can be one of the most naive people I know, but she has only ever brought kindness and love into this world because of it.” 

“You’ve already taken so many from me…,” she pleads, unable to hold back the tears as a few escape and trail down her cheeks. “Please don’t take her too.” 

A moment later she felt the warmth of an arm wrap around her and turned to see Noah sit down next to her, their carry-ons bags sitting on the floor in the aisle next to the pew. 

She buried her face in his chest. He wrapped his arms around her, placed a tender kiss on her head and held her close as she finally let the tears pour out. 

Upon landing in South Carolina, Y/N's sister met them at baggage claim. She looked as tired and spread thin as Y/N did. She knew just how much Olivia meant to her little sister, and also considered her a good friend. But her bond of friendship was no wear near as unbreakable as the one that had been built between Olivia and Y/N over the years.

She wrapped Y/N up into a tight hug and let her know that Olivia had been rushed back into emergency surgery about an hour before they had landed. They had found internal bleeding that was previously missed due to the severity of the initial trauma sustained in the crash, causing her previously stable condition to quickly deteriorate. 

Upon arriving at Columbia Memorial Hospital, they quickly located Olivia’s parents in the waiting room outside the Intensive Care Unit. Olivia’s mother, Mary grabbed Y/N in a  bone crushing hug the second she saw her, thanking them for coming as quickly as they did. She followed the band and knew the journey they had made to be there. Before they could speak further, a man dressed in surgical scrubs emerged from the large bay door. She felt Noah take her hand and give it a squeeze.

Mary walked over to the doctor. He grabbed her hands and shook his head. Y/N couldn’t hear the words he spoke, but Mary’s reaction to them told her all she needed to know. 

Olivia was gone.

Y/N felt numb. She felt her emotions shut down. She wanted to cry, to scream, to fall to her knees but her body just remained frozen in place for what felt like an eternity. Noah’s hand never left hers and his grip never faltered.

They briefly expressed their condolences to Mary and other member’s of their family before leaving them space to grieve. There was no reason for them to stay at the hospital while Mary began the heartbreaking task of preparing for her only child’s funeral. 

The drive to her sister’s house was silent. She showed Y/N and Noah to the guest room and left them to unpack and prepare for bed. 

Y/N found little sleep that night. As sunlight began to stream in through the bedroom window, she turned to peer at the clock on the nightstand. 

It read 6:00am. She quietly rose so as not to disturb Noah’s sleeping form in the bed next to her. She quickly dressed, grabbed her sneakers, and headed out the front door. 

Y/N ran. 

She ran until her lungs felt like broken shards of glass. 

She ran until her legs felt like they were made of jello.

She ran until her feet were numb and weighed heavy like cinder blocks.

In school, she ran after her first heartbreak, she ran when her father died of cancer, she ran when her mother became absent in her own grief leaving her and her sister to fend for themselves, until she would eventually pass as well. 

She ran when all of life's problems seemed to pile up as high as the peaks of Mount Everest and bare down on her shoulders. 

When life didn’t make sense, Y/N ran. 

Olivia had always been the one to run with her. When her own body would grow tired she would remain on the bench at the trailhead of the old high school cross country course, making sure Y/N knew she wasn’t alone. 

But now Olivia was gone and the bench by the trailhead sat empty save for the water bottle Y/N had discarded at the start of her run. She tried to ignore the empty spot as she set out on her second loop. 

As she circled around again she spotted a second water bottle sitting next to hers on the bench. She felt the already growing agitation stir inside her further at the idea of having to interact with a stranger on the course. She prayed they would just run their route and leave her alone. 

Halfway through her third loop she heard the sound of another person coming up from behind her and expected them to call out what side they would be passing her and continue their run. 

Instead the person fell into stride next to her. She turned her head, ready to tell the stranger to politely fuck off, but stopped when she saw Noah running next to her.

He didn’t say anything, just kept running, never leaving her side as they continued to complete two more loops. He knew this was something she had to do, and despite his own fatigue, he wasn’t going to let her do it alone. 

Toward the end of her fifth loop, she felt her legs start to give way. Her toes snagged on a root sticking up in the middle of the path and she waited for her body to hit the dirt. She thought that maybe she would just lay there for a while and let the earth swallow her whole, but the impact never came. 

Instead she felt Noah wrap his arms around her. Pulling her firmly into his chest. The weight of everything she tried to hold inside started to fracture and crumble around her. The emotion she tried to run from rebounded back like a lightning bolt striking her directly in the heart. She thrashed against his hold and hit the bottom of her fists against his chest. 

She screamed out in rage as the hot tears streamed down her face. But despite her best attempts at getting him to let go, his hold remained firm. Noah was sure that his chest was red by the time she finally relaxed in his arms. He took the opportunity to kneel down and scooped the sobbing figure of the woman he loved into his arms. She didn’t have the energy to protest as he carefully carried her home. 

The funeral took place four days later. It was held at St. Joseph's Cathedral downtown where four generations of Olivia’s family had been baptized, confirmed, married, and eulogized. She could not deny that the Mass her family prepared had been beautiful despite Y/N not knowing much about the ways and traditions of the Catholic Church. 

After the service, Mary came up to the both of them and thanked them again for traveling back like they did and for staying for the service. 

“You were the closest thing Olivia had to a sister and even though it may not have seemed like it at times, you were and still are like my second child.” She stated. “Thank you for being her friend and being in our lives.” 

Tears once again formed in her eyes as Mary pulled her in for one of her soul squeezing motherly hugs that Y/N learned to cherish over the years. 

“I love you so much” she said, reaching up to grab either side of Y/N’s face, wiping away the tears with the pads of her thumbs. “And I am so proud of you.”

“I love you too.” Y/N replied, before hugging the woman once again. 

The next day they were scheduled to fly back to LA, but not before visiting Olivia’s grave. It was covered in layers of floral arrangements and marked by a temporary placard with ‘Olivia Renee Barber” and her dates of birth and death engraved on dark metal. 

Noah stayed back as Y/N paid her respects. He wished that he could take all of her grief and carry it on his own shoulders so she didn’t have to weather the burden. He knew from his own experiences that she had to go through this process at her own pace. Loss was not linear and there were no magical boxes to check as you grieve and heal.

There was one thing he knew for absolute certain. As long as he was around, she would never go through anything in this world alone. He’d be there to catch her when she’d fall and just as he knew she’d do the same for him in return.

[whencyclopedia]

Monotheism in the Ancient World

Monotheism is simply defined as the belief in one god and is usually positioned as the polar opposite of polytheism, the belief in many gods. However, the word monotheism is a relatively modern one that was coined in the mid-17th century CE by the British philosopher Henry More (1614-1687 CE). It comes from the Greek words, monos (single) and theos (god). In the Western tradition, this 'belief in one god' specifically refers to the God of the Bible; the God of Judaism, Christianity, and Islam (and always written with a capital G). However, in the ancient world, the concept of monotheism as we understand it today did not exist; all ancient people were polytheists. They may have elevated one god as higher than the others (henotheism) but nevertheless recognized the existence of divine multiplicity.

The concept of the universe for the ancients consisted of three realms: the sky (the heavens); earth (humans); and the underworld (sometimes known as the netherworld or simply 'the land of the dead'). The sky was the domain of the gods and was crowded with a host of divinities understood in a gradient of powers. Many ancient civilizations had a dominant god, or a king of the gods, with other divinities being in charge of various aspects of life, serving as a court of advisers, or simply as messengers to humans below. Many of these powers could transcend (cross over) to the earth below in various manifestations. They could also travel to the underworld, and in those manifestations were known as chthonic (underworld powers). Some of the lesser deities, known as daemons, came to be perceived as evil over time (demons). These powers were believed to be able to possess people and functioned as an explanation for diseases and mental disorders.

Belief, Faith, & Creed

The modern concept of monotheism also assumes two other concepts, that of 'belief' and 'faith.' The problem in understanding religions in antiquity is not that they did not believe in things or that they lacked faith in the gods and goddesses. However, this was not often articulated or manifest in the same way that we now assume in our religious systems. Unlike the later creeds of Christianity, there was no comparable creed in the various ethnic cults in the Mediterranean basin.

The closest equivalent of shared knowledge was found in the works of Homer (Iliad; Odyssey) Hesiod (Theogony; Works and Days) and the myths of the bards as the basis of stories of creation and the gods and heroes. There was no central authority (like the Vatican) to dictate conformity of beliefs and practices. Each ethnic group developed rituals and practices necessary for worship (consisting of sacrifices) that was passed down to their ancestors from the gods. It was crucially important to carry out these rituals without mistakes.

Continue reading...

[kotylynnemerrill]

Okay y'all....here is the rest of ch. 1...or just another little section. Tbh I'm still not sure how I want this to flow but I'm working through the process.

Y'all know the drill 😁

Your words I hold forever

************* ❤️**********

11:52

Fez isn't sure how long it's been...how long they've been sitting here, but it must be getting close to midnight judging by the sudden surge in the party's energy. He's doesn't really care to be honest.

He focuses on her voice...the way her mouth moves as she speaks and Fez isn't entirely sure she's not giving him some sort of high from her presence alone or if the joint he just finished is finally kicking in.

Maybe she's a siren he thinks as his blue eyes flitter up to her brown ones...now bright and hypnotizing. Her guard is down, obviously in her element as she talks.

Lexi Howard is in fact a wealth of random knowledge and he loves it. She speaks about Christians stealing Christmas from the Germanic pagans, about how King James was rewriting the Bible while also trying to turn his pee into gold...whether or not Johnson would be successful in limiting the Soviet power in southeast Asia.

Fez wasn't necessarily a pessimist but neither was he optimistic when it came to the current governments abilities. Lexi was hopeful though despite agreeing with him. Like most of America, she was not so sure morally it was a great idea that the US got involved in the war in Vietnam.

The war had already caused a lot of devastation in the effort to stop the spread of communism...a lot of devastation economically as well.

This led to them talking about God and yet again Fez is surprised by this woman sitting next to him.

"Do you, like, not believe in God then?" Lexi shakes her head no...Fez calls her fearless. She laughs a little at this.

" I wouldn't say that...more like I'm guided by my severe discomfort of religion in general. I mean you look at all the shitty things happening in the world right now...I don't see how this person...this being who has all this power...power to stop the war...and all this unnecessary death, but doesn't. And we're just supposed to put all our faith in him? Say he works in mysterious ways and it's his will. It's cruel. I don't know if I'd want someone like that in charge of the entire universe or judging me for my actions for that matter." She heaves a sigh. "I'm not naive though...I realize that..."

"You don't gotta explain yourself. I get what you're sayin." Fez grins playfully. "I know by now you ain't one of those flower girls."

"you mean flower children?" Lexi laughs at the name bestowed upon the free loving group of people...also called hippies.

"Yeah...I'm not one of those either."

Lexi is all white teeth as she playfully nudges fez's worn leather loafer with her dark heel.

"Do you believe in God?" She asks quietly.

"Hell yeah I believe in God." Fez looks up towards the ceiling as if he could sense the 'big guy' looking down on them.

"Like there's a man sitting in the clouds...judging all your actions?"

"Hell yeah."

"Really?" Her eyebrows are raised and eyes wide. Not judging but genuinely curious.

"I mean...I look at it like this. We all do shit and eventually we gotta answer for it...the whole cost of havin free will and shit... balance. Ain't nobody exempt from that... especially not me. I've done things I've got to answer for you feel me? I've had to do what I had to - I ain't blamin anyone else for that shit though. But I don't think we're totally damned either."

Lexi tilted her head thoughtfully. "I'm still not a hundred percent on board but I see your point." Fez raises his hands, and slightly tilted his head as if to say 'well I tried '.

"You here with anybody?"

Lexi scrunches her nose again...annoyed...as if just remembering why she was here in the first place... remembering the source of her stress earlier.

"I was supposed to meet my sister here...she was supposed to ride back home with me after the party, but I'm pretty sure she ditched me."

"That's a shame. I'm real sorry to hear that. She's missing out" Fez flicked his eyes towards the crowd of dancing bodies. Wondered if she would join him for a dance...not that he was much of a dancer...but maybe...

"Ehh," Lexi gave a half-hearted shrug, "not really. I'm pretty boring. That's why none of my other friends bothered to come except Rue..." Lexi pauses, her brows furrowing in thought. "I haven't seen her either tonight."

Fez felt guilts chains tug at him again hearing this. She should be hanging out with Rue tonight...maybe if he had just kept a closer eye on her she wouldn't be..he didn't want to think about where she had gotten to...or what she was more than likely doing.

As hard as it was...he told himself again, tonight - whatever Rue was up to, was not his fault.

He turned his attention back to Lexi and the way her full lips were down turned. He wanted to see her smile again. If he made her smile...said a prayer before bed tonight, like his grandmother taught him...maybe God would be gracious enough to grant him protection and the will to get through what was to come in the coming months.

"What do you mean boring...you're like the coolest person here."

Lexi blanches at this, and furiously begins to denying what was obviously, in Fez's correct opinion, nothing but pure facts.

"Why would I lie?" Her cheeks are crimson again and she unsuccessfully tries to hide it (and the wide smile) behind her slender hand.

Fez could get used to this. He was definitely gonna make a conscious effort to pray more often... everyday in fact, if it would allow him to see her smile like this.

"...thanks." she folds her hands back in her lap again seemingly giving up on trying to hide the effect he had on her.

Yeah...he would pray everyday for the rest of his life if need be.

"Yo I gotta cut soon, but...I just wanted to tell you that...talking to you was one of the best parts of my whole year."

"Yeah right..." Lexi huffs and Fez feels his chest clench in agitation. Had no one ever told her how special she clearly was...how magical...

"Why you always do that shit?"

"What?"

"Like... doubting yourself and shit."

"Oh. Ion know...do I do that?"

"Mm... kinda." Fez let's his eyes flick over her before leaning foward, bracing his hands on his knees.

Courage...Courage...Courage...

"I really liked talkin to you tonight...for real. I'd like to do it again sometime."

Something shines in Lexi's eyes as she stares at him. Something warm and determined...like she had found the missing puzzle piece...and wasn't going to let it go.

"Yeah...me too."

[tateshifts]

Are religions significant in the wizarding world, or do they have their own unique beliefs? I'm really curious about this. Also, do any of the Slytherin boys believe in anything? Like Christian’s or Atheists ? It's something that's always intrigued me, and I'd love to know more.

hiii omg this is so interesting i LOVE this question !!!!!

disclaimer ; this is just what i’ve heard, seen or learnt in my dr. i don’t have any religious beliefs myself so PLEASE if there’s anything wrong with what ive written let me know !!

wizards do sort of have their own beliefs, i’ve not looked into that much but they do believe in the ‘immortal wizard’ Merlin. wizards equivalent to saying ‘Gods sake’ or ‘oh my God’ is actually ‘Merlin’s beard’ or ‘for the love of Merlin’. Merlin was supposedly a very influential wizard and he was thought to have actually been one of the first wizards to act upon the prejudices against muggles and muggleborns.

We learnt about him in History of Magic and how he ‘legendary’ he was. Merlin is kind of the equivelant to God in this universe. Most wizards believe he was a real person who just had a lot of influence on the wizarding world at one point, and others believe that he was just a myth or a legend. There is one written record of his account from his times in the Medival period which is why there is a chocolate frog card that states he was part of King Arthur’s Court. There’s a lot of holes around his timeline so this is what makes some wizards believe that his history is just anecdotes.

But for the most part Merlin is like a god to wizards. They don’t have a religious label/name for believing in him and it’s not shamed upon if you do or don’t believe in him. You can’t really tell when a person does believe in him, it’s kind of like here when you meet a person for the first time you can’t tell whether they believe in God or not- you just ask i guess ? There is no equivalent to a bible or quran or a torah, and i’m pretty sure he didn’t have any teachings.

The boys don’t believe in Merlin, but they do say ‘oh for Merlin’s sake’ and such. When i first shifted I was so confused on who Merlin was and I kind of had to peice it together myself until we were taught about him. My memories in my dr we’re very hazy so that didn’t help me out at all when people used culture references around me, i just had sit, nod, and smile LMAO

People our age don’t typically believe in Merlin, it’s mostly the older generations of the Wizarding World.

In Muggle Studies we do learn about muggle beliefs and religions, we were to learn about Christianity, Judaism and Islam and write an essay about one of them.

i hope i answered you’re question good, i tried my best 😭 and THANK U SM FOR THE ASK🫶🫶🫶

[beemoon17]

Deconstructing my Religion + Reading the Bible Beginning to End

I grew up Christian the way many Americans do. If people asked or if I asked what our religion was I was told Christian, my family has occasional periods where we’d go to church on Sunday mornings, that sort of thing. It wasn’t something we really talked about at home or made a big deal about living by. I went to a Christian school for two years, from 4th to 5th grade, I’m autistic and my mom thought I’d benefit from the smaller class sizes, but she pulled me out after 5th grade because I came out as transgender in 5th and she figured it wasn’t the best environment for me as a queer person.

I’ve explored alternative religions and spiritualities most of my life, starting around 5th grade. I’ve been interested in the Greek gods, witchcraft and paganism, Norse gods, deities like Lord Lucifer or King Asmodeus. It’s in my nature to research, it’s always been my favorite activity. So I’ve read books, posts on social media, watched videos, explored articles. And although I developed technical understandings and even interests in worshiping specific deities or participating in specific practice, I’ve never been able to allow myself to commit.

I wondered often why that is. I’ve wondered why I hold so much fear over doing it wrong, making mistakes, or even just not knowing enough. I’ve come to the conclusion that it is because even though Christianity was not as large an influence in my life as it was for others, it was still an influence, especially because of my queer identity and the commonly held views of Christians in regards to that. I’ve decided that in order to commit fully to a religious or spiritual path that feels right for me I need to fully understand, dissect, and deconstruct my personal understanding of the Christian religion.

To do this I have decided to read the Bible the whole way through, taking notes on my questions interpretations, theories, and general observations. I have decided that I will post my musings here on my blog for others to enjoy. I will put a disclaimer, I am clearly not an expert on religion. I have not studied it in a university, I am not a professor, I am not a philosopher. I’m just a regular old person. My views are subject to personal bias, my interpretations are not full proof , and my theories and ideas will not always be without holes or questionable logic. I am not perfect and make no claims to be. However, I refuse to prescribe to an archaic and classist idea that the Bible and other religious texts can only be interpreted and understood by scholars and those of “superior” intellect. Texts that are published to the public, texts that many are expected to choose to base their lives and morals around, should be analyzed and reviewed by those people. If I get anything blatantly wrong, or if you have other ideas or interpretations, I am extremely open to hearing about my mistakes or discussing things! I love to talk, be respectful and it’ll be fun! These are also my thoughts as I read, as I read I stopped and wrote down exactly what my first thoughts and questions were. So many of them may be incomplete or subject to change and rethinking as I go on. I am providing my in the moment thoughts and opinions, and also my evolution of thoughts.

I’ve decided to take note of every commandment/rule/law so that I can know and understanding them all, so some of these bullet points will just be those with no thoughts. Others will be general observations. There will also be questions, many of which I will have answers to whether that be answers I found through research or answers I found through my personal understandings. I will also have “theories.” And so, without anything else to add, here are my notes.

1. Genesis 2:3 “Then God blessed the seventh day and made it holy, because on it he rested from all the work of creating that he had done.”

2. Genesis 2:9 “The LORD God made all kinds of trees grow out of the ground — trees that were pleasing to the eye and food for food. In the middle of the garden were the tree of life and the tree of the knowledge of good and evil.” I had never known there were two distinct trees in the garden, I was always led to understand these two trees as the same, interchangeable in name and function.

3. Why is LORD written in all capital letters at some times and not at others? This is because LORD is a translation of the Hebrew word considered to be the true name of God “YHWH” or “YHVH”. It was written this way because Hebrew lacked vowels and when written, people just knew how to pronounce it aloud despite it not being written out. The Jewish people also had a tradition, a belief, about not saying the true name of God aloud out of respect, because it was holy, instead they would say “Adonai” which is Hebrew word meaning “Lord”, when reading aloud or speaking of God. So in the Old Testament when it says LORD it is a translation of “YHWH” or “YHVH”, the true name of God, and when the Old Testament just says Lord it is a translation of the word “Adonai” which literally means lord, sovereign, or master. When “God” is used to refer to God it is translated most often in the Old Testament from the word “Elohim”, it is a plural word often used alongside singular words to refer to God. It is also used in reference to other gods in the Old Testament.

4. Genesis 2:16-17 ‘And the LORD God commanded the man “You are free to eat from any tree in the garden; but you must not eat from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, for when you eat from it you will certainly die.”’ I noted that Adam was given no commands regarding the other special tree mentioned, the tree of life.

5. In Genesis 2:18 and Genesis 2:20 the word “helper” is used to describe the companion God hopes for Adam to have, what is this word helper translated from? It is translated from the Hebrew word “ezer.” The word ezer is also used to refer to God himself 16 times from what I read, including in Psalms 33:20 and Psalms 115:9 where the word is used to describe God as a help to us, to man. Many view women as being created as a subordinate to man, created to be his helper in a way that implies she is less than or subordinate, but the same word used to describe woman’s purpose in being created is used to describe God. And one thing the Christian god is not is subordinate to his creations. Going by this interpretation of the word, I would say that woman was created to be an equal partner to man, to act as a protector, a strength, a rescuer and an ally.

6. In Genesis 2:21-22, God, who is referred to using masculine pronouns, and Adam, who is a man, create the first woman, Eve. Two MEN are responsible for the creation of a person, the first person ever created from another person rather than from God alone. God takes a rib from Adam and fashions it into Eve, and so Eve is, in a way, born from Adam’s body. It almost feels like the creation story here is a way to discredit women in the act of creation, to take away from what it means that women create life in their wombs and bring men and women both into the world. From the gender perspective of the time women are people with vaginas who give birth. So how do you take away from this power women have, this insane act of creation they are capable of? Give the credit to men. I mean right after this in Genesis 2:23 it says ‘The man said, “this is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called ‘woman,’ for she was taken out of man.”’ But it is literally men who are taken from women, who come from women, life comes from women!

(I personally have a much more complex view of sex and gender, of what it means to give birth, be pregnant, and to be a woman. However, for the case of the perspectives of the time and for my sanity I am using simple and non exploratory language that does not encapsulate my full understanding of sex and gender.)

7. Genesis 3:4-5 ‘“You will not certainly die,” the serpent said to the woman. “For God knows that when you eat from it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil.”’ That is what the serpent says to Eve about eating from the tree, and I’m going to argue that I don’t believe he lied. Yes, the serpent led Eve to disobey the word of God, which of course God would not like, and by Christian standards would be considered sinful, but he in no way lied to do it. As I mentioned before, in Genesis 2:16-17 it says this ‘And the LORD God commanded the man “You are free to eat from any tree in the garden; but you must not eat from the tree of knowledge of good and evil, for when you eat from it you will certainly die.”’ God gives no reason why it is bad that Adam would gain this knowledge, the only reason he gives not to eat from it is that he would certainly die when he did. Now, do Adam and Eve one day die? Yes. Do they die as a result of eating from the tree of knowledge of good and evil? No, not in my opinion, which I will explain, and so the serpent didn’t lie about that, it was not certain that Adam and Eve would die as a result of eating from the tree, and they did not certainly have to die at all. Additionally, the serpent says that Eve will become like God if she eats from the tree of knowledge, which she does, as God confirms himself in Genesis 3:22. So once again no lie from the serpent. The serpent only offered Eve what she truly desired, which was KNOWLEDGE, which was WISDOM, as is stated in Genesis 3:6. Eating the fruit didn’t take away Adam and Eve’s immortality, it wasn’t a fruit that stripped them of that, they couldn’t be stripped of it even if it was because Adam and Eve were mortal when they ate the fruit. Eating the fruit simply gave Adam and Eve the same knowledge of good and evil that God himself possessed, which God did not like. Going back to Genesis 3:22-23, which says ‘And the LORD God said, “The man has now become like one of us, knowing good and evil. He must not be allowed to reach out his hand and take also from the tree of life and eat, and live forever.” So the LORD God banished him from the Garden of Eden to work the ground from which he had been taken.’ When we go back to this verse we see that Adam and Eve did not have to “certainly die”, they possessed the same knowledge and wisdom that God himself possessed, and God was immortal with this knowledge and wisdom, and according to his text possesses this knowledge and wisdom and is still purely good and without sin or fault. So it stands to reason that God simply did not like that Adam and Eve had this knowledge themselves, and so he chose to punish them with death and harder lives. Not for anything truly evil, purely for not doing what he said, and for possessing knowledge that he did not wish them to have. Knowledge that perhaps made them too much like him for God’s taste, too equal to him.

8. All of that above translated to an idea or theory or whatever you’d like to call it in my mind. It seems to me that Heaven may not be the ideal happy place most think it will be. Long after the time of Adam and Eve, the Bible says that Jesus comes to Earth to die for humanity’s sins and give us the gift of eternal life, which God did not allow Adam and Eve to have on account of their gaining of knowledge of good and evil, their new found wisdom. So, in my mind it seems logical to assume that going to Heaven is not just about loving Jesus and God, and viewing them as your savior. My “theory” is that in order to go to Heaven you have to give up what Adam and Eve took for themselves and for all of humanity, the knowledge of good and evil. You pay for your passage into Heaven by becoming a blank slate of sorts, you become passive, without higher critical thought. You lose the likeness to God humanity gained through eating the fruit of the tree of knowledge of good and evil, the likeness that in my theory, is humanity’s ability to create like God, to have ideas like God of new and big things, to innovate and wonder and speculate. Heaven is enteral mindless bliss and worship and devotion, and all it costs is everything that makes you free and “human” as we view humanity today.

[boybff]

wait hiiiii hi hello bestie i didn’t know u like video essays!! i’ve been trying to find more to watch recently, do u have any other recs? about any topic 👀

HIIIIII bestie Robin, are you ready?? After harvesting my Youtube subscription and liked video lists here is what I have compiled. I'm gonna put my current top 5 video recommendations and then the rest of the list, under the cut, is organized by creator.

Why Are There So Many Confederate Vampires

The art of religious interpretation (midnight mass vs god’s not dead)

Defunctland: Walt Disney's City of the Future, E.P.C.O.T.

Hogwarts Legacy, JK Rowling, and Trans Advocacy

Cultural Inspirations in Avatar: The Last Airbender Book 1 - Water 

CHANNELS

biz barclay - hilarious, brilliant, my best friend who drinks wine and weaves me long insightful stories while sitting on the dresser or in the bathtub. The vast amount of knowledge, historical 

understanding snapewives: religion, fandom, sociology, & erotica

Goncharov (1973) video essay

The art of religious interpretation (midnight mass vs god’s not dead)

Xiran Jay Zhao - Author of one of my FAVE YA novels, “Iron Widow” (which is a MUST read). I always want more avatar content that focuses on cultural inspirations from trusted sources. Xiran taught me so much about the avatar universe I already loved as well as valuable critiques. They also do retellings of historical events such as- Bisexual Han Dynasty Emperors and Forgotten Warrior Queen - Fu Hao.

Cultural Inspirations in Avatar: The Last Airbender Book 1 - Water 

Cultural Inspirations in Avatar: The Last Airbender Book 2 - Earth 

Cultural Inspirations in Avatar: The Last Airbender Book 3 - Fire 

Fundie Fridays - Jen, a leftist queer feminist, and her husband James examine different aspects of Christian fundamentalism, American conservative politics and pop culture. She has remade a lot of her older videos so make sure to watch the updated versions! She was also featured in the Amazon docuseries “Shiny Happy People” which I would HIGHLY recommend. 

Vacation Bible School of Rock (3 part video series History of Contemporary Christian Music)

Ken Ham’s Creation Museum & Ark Encounter

Ask a Mortician - Caitlin Doughty!!! The adult Wednesday Addams we should have got. So compassionate, informed, and moving!! I love her work and she has taught me so much about what it means to have a relationship with death and grief. Her work deals with heavy topics and you can tell she does this work from a deeply respectful, informed place. 

The Lake That Never Gives Up Her Dead

Let’s Visit the Churches Made of Human Skulls

Why are Black and White Funeral Homes STILL Separate? With Dr. Kami Fletcher

Iconic Corpse Series

Princess Weekes -  Nuanced video essays on pop culture, race, feminism, and other social issues. Takes time to break down complex concepts, their origins and material consequences. The essay on confederate vampires and the connection later made to sci-fi media like Firefly were so paradigm shifting to me!

Why Are There So Many Confederate Vampires

The Magical Negroes of Stephen King

Ro Ramdin - Poetic, biting, and introspective essays on pop culture. 

Do Celebrities Hate Their Fans? (Doja Cat, Frank Ocean)

Hogwarts Legacy, JK Rowling, and Trans Advocacy

DefunctLand- History of extinct theme parks and themed entertainment experiences. 

Defunctland: Walt Disney's City of the Future, E.P.C.O.T.

Disney Channel’s Theme: A History Mystery

Mina Le - Fashion, movies and pop culture

WHY IS EVERYTHING SO UGLY: The Curse of Modernism

FAIRYTALE COSTUMES: it’s giving renfaire but why?

Quinton Reviews - Extensive videos covering niche topics, most popular for Nickelodeon deep dive retrospectives.

How Documentaries Lie to You

The ICarly/Victorious Saga Playlist

TheEpicNate315 - yea i fucking love endless hours of useless skyrim lore because the conspiracies are so deep and I have to do 0 of the research to get all of the information years of scouts worked to piece together! 

The Skyrim Mysteries Iceberg (Part 1 of 4)

The Fallout Mysteries Iceberg (Part 1 of 2, incomplete series)

Mike’s Mic - Silly, goofy, and thorough breakdowns of nostalgic TV shows

Any of his unhinged recaps - LOST, Pretty Little Liars, Glee

Tiffanyferg - Media criticism and commentary

Internet Analysis Series 

Zoë Ligon - sex educator, artist, and writer, who also owns SpectrumBoutique.com, a health and education oriented sex toy store. Such a special place in my heart for her!! Her bondage mini-documentary with Midori was so touching. 

Sex Stuff | Japanese Rope Bondage with Midori

Channels Newer to Me

Broey Deschanel - a mixture of film analyses, retrospectives, politics and just absolutely overthinking anything to do with pop culture

Elvis (2022) and the Utter Mediocrity of Biopics 

Meeptop - rambling about movies and stuff

Who is Dahmer Even Made For?

LadyJenevia - discussing entertainment media content including films, television series, etc. Expect to find reviews of recent cinematic releases, video essays on older releases, and interviews with talent from the film/television industry

Glass Onion: A Knives Out Mystery and The Art of Hiding in Plain Sight (Netflix Review/Video Essay)

As a disclaimer, I am not endorsing any creator fully and if you see someone you think I should not promote please reach out to me so I can edit this list. As a general rule of thumb the more I had to write about someone, the more informed the recommendation.

[beebopboom]

Always an Angel, Never a Man

Intro post - where we discussed some more Wizard of Oz parallels and some of the title sequence

Now though we are going to dive deeper in the character that is the Metatron, and for that we are going to be going into The Book of Enoch and who he is as an angel - at least for this part

Background info

I've said this before but I’ll reiterate here - yes I know that Neil has said…somewhere that the Metatron has always been an angel in reference to someone asking about Enoch - but I don't think we can throw all the books away especially when it seems ideas have been pulled from them.

This actually started out as a question of whether or not the Metatron had come down to Earth and paraded around as Enoch to further his agenda - and well, it was a start.

So for the most part there seems to be two explanations for the origins of the Metatron - one: he was always an angel - two: he was the human, Enoch who was then turned into the Metatron. Each of these versions vary from religion to religion but for the most part that’s the gist of it

ha yeah right you know me time for probably unnecessary long explanations to the best of my ability

Disclaimer (I guess): These explanations are not going to stick to just one religion and are going to be summaries to the best of my ability - summaries are the devil how tf do people do this all the time

Also this is quite long - it took me about ten minutes to read through

The Metatron

The Voice of God, King of Angels, Prince of Divine Presence, Prince of the World, Prince of the Countenance, lesser YHWH, Angel of the Veil

Just some of the titles that have been attributed to the archangel known as Metatron - the list could go on

Created before or along side fellow archangels - including Michael, Gabriel, Raphael, and Uriel - he is considered to be above them and the one they defer to. He sits at the hand of God as their scribe and is one of the few angels able to see beyond the veil God sits behind, able to look upon and hear God. He is said to have immense Power and Wisdom

His main job is to write down the good deeds of both Heaven and the Earth and record those in the Book of Life. He is said to have connections to both the Tree of Knowledge and the Tree of Life therefore having a special interface between the two realms, physical and celestial - he is a bridge between God and humanity. He is a patron angel of children, giving them the knowledge they had not received and can be said to have been the angel who led the people of Israel through the wilderness. He is in charge of guiding the souls ascending to Heaven.

He is often attributed to roles God, Jesus, and even the Archangel Michael has had - to the point where there is a story of Rabbi Elisha calling out that there were two powers in Heaven and the Metatron is punished by 60 fiery lashes and unable to sit in Gods presence again for not correcting the assumption

Which leads us to the other origin story for him and that is-

Enoch

Now he has one mention in the Bible in the book of Genesis and it is only to say he no longer walks among men because God took him. This then spawned the Book of Enoch - which is really three books. Among other stories that I will get into later - it is the story of a man that was so righteous God took him so he didn’t experience death and made him an angel with all the same roles as we just went over.

This book covers things such as the concepts of fallen angels, a Messiah, Resurrection, the Final Judgement, and a heavenly kingdom on earth

………we aren't going to talk about the Nephilim

But there are these angels called the Watchers who have banded together and turned away from God. Enoch is shown the destruction and knowledge these angels have put upon humanity and shown the four archangels and their task to go about fixing the Earth. Enoch is then tasked with telling the Watchers that they shall have no peace or forgiveness for sin. He then goes on to see the universe - the Earth, the cosmos, and both Heaven and Hell - guided by angels. He sees the fiery pit that is where the Fallen are held and the river where all the dead souls await Judgement. He is shown the cornerstone of Earth and the pillars(mountains) of Heaven, and on the highest one sits the throne of God. He is told the secrets of the stars and is shown the hierarchy of Angels. 

He goes on a few journeys through the Heavens and eventually turned into the angel Metatron - which some would say this is a reversal of the Fall of Man, where Enoch is given that “spark" back. Upon reaching the 6th sphere of Heaven the angels call out to God asking why he has been brought to Heaven and God answered that he was righteous and worth the rest of the people - this is placed in flood times I forgot to mention

But why is any of this important? Well we are working with around 10 minutes of screentime people - crumbs I tell you, crumbs.

What really got this going though was Metatron saying this when referring to his outfit and corporation

"This calls for much less attention, though”

This implies the Metatron knows how to blend in - with humans and angels……and demons

But particularly with humans - further proven with the line

"I've ingested things in my time, you know”

Whether or not this is true he is really pushing this in front of Aziraphale and Crowley - clothes and food wonder why - it’s almost like it’s reminiscent of another conversation, one between Aziraphale and Gabriel back in season one at the Sushi restaurant.

Anyway though - the Metatron may not have had the transformation from Enoch but the story is still relevant to who he is as a character - it’s actually a great combination of the two

In season one he only appears as a floating head but I want to start with right before he appears

Four lights come down and four pointed stars start to appear

The thing is I think these are meant to represent our archangel council

The number four and its connection to the Metatron has been sitting in the back of my head for a while now - it's a common grouping in good omens with the horsepeople, the them, the angels, and the demons - but I think it's also a call back to Enoch and the four archangels that guided him, here me out - I mean it’s four colored lights surrounded by stars cmon

The only one missing is Raphael. In season one he is replaced with Sandalphon - who has a special connection to the Metatron with a similar origin story as Enoch and is said to be his twin brother. In season two he is replaced with Saraqael who is also mentioned in the Book of Enoch, one of the only places to do so.

This council though is the last stop before reaching the Metatron - so they have to come first. Four angels at the trial and four (active) angels when he appears in the bookshop. Sensing a theme of needing four angels.

Aziraphale then asks if he is God which is quickly corrected by the Metatron saying he is only the voice and to speak to him is to speak to God which then Aziraphale calls him a presidential spokesperson - and yeah that all tracks for what we know to be his role, just no mention of the other things he is in charge of

Which let’s take a quick break to point out that the Metatron is supposed to guide souls into Heaven - Heaven is very much empty, where are you taking them our dark clothed angel hmmm?

Season two though we really get a look into his character

In the trial we get to see a bunch of floating heads and yet his is still different, as he has no body. He is still concealed with no corporation - behind that curtain

Now we have two instances of this both in Heaven and Earth - not something we see with anyone else who all have a corporation to move about - besides when Aziraphale gets discorporated but even then he is still shown with his whole see-through body. So here is that special interface playing out - his way of showing his position off and maintaining an air of mystery

An interesting thing to note during his speech is him saying that for one prince of heaven to be cast down to hell makes for a good story - in the habit of telling stories about fallen angels there Metatron?

Now we’ve analyzed the coffee shop scene to death and I don’t particularly have anything to add so we are just going to keep truckin

But the bookshop - the bookshop tells us so much.

He walks in and hardly anyone recognizes him - only Crowley and Saraqael. And this makes sense, he’s in a corporal form - out from behind the curtain. The thing that made him special, that put him above other archangels - he’s removed it. They’ve probably never felt his full essence and it’s not like it’s going to set off alarm bells when they are the same rank as you, essentially. Then Crowley describes him in terms he knew Aziraphale (and others) would recognize - finally cluing everyone in 

But why Crowley and Saraqael? What makes them special?

I’ll admit I don’t have a clear answer for Saraqael - for why they are different. Only a theory that they are one of the angels that he has keeping an eye on the angelic deeds he was told to keep track of - perhaps even the corporations that are being used, when one is needed and whatnot

Crowley though is a Fallen Angel - the series goes through great lengths to stress this point - this term. You may remember that this is the term used in Enoch to describe the Watchers. The group of angels that turned away from God and Enoch then had to inform them of their fate.

It’s been sprinkled in throughout the series that Crowley only ever asked those “damn fool” questions and went his “own way” with hints that those questions were never asked to God. Which leaves the Metatron. The Metatron who Crowley has seen.

"Oh I know you. Last time I saw you, you were a big, floating giant head, mind.”

The last time implying there was a Before - before the beginning perhaps.

So let’s say God gives this criteria of what qualifies as a rebelling angel which then the Metatron is supposed to carry out the acts of punishment - except he’s an angelic scribe not a fighter so he gives this confrontation job to fellow archangels, let’s say Michael, and tells them this what God told them to do, while he works on the way to make it actually stick - through the Book of Life and finally activating the threat of this book by crossing the angels out causing them to lose their names, their status, their place in paradise

and then comes in this pretty high ranking angel, a prince perhaps, asking these questions that just happen to fit into this criteria but different in the way that they don’t want it all to end and you still turn him away

(I’m probably going to do a whole other thing about the connection between Crowley and the Metatron but for the sake of not derailing this post even more I’m just going to move on)

The Book of Life - The Metatron is said to be the angel that writes in it - records all the names of the beings doing good deeds in both Heaven and Earth. He hears all, sees all, and he’s going through past exploits. And yet has only just recently made a move - he truly is a King

He immediately calls Michael out for their “you’ll be erased from existence” spew saying they don’t have the authority for that and sending them away - implying he does have the authority and he’s here to offer a way for that not to happen**

And here on out we get to see some interesting characteristics. The Metatron has always been one to offer shallow praise - even back in season one - and he is shown to be openly revered and feared. He has this all seeing - big brother affect on all the angels. He is said to see everything it’s only a matter of what and when he chooses to use it. And use it well he does - he’s manipulative with praise and interest, with the knowledge he reveals. He is also in the nature to wind them up and watch them go. I’d say this is a twisted take on the Patron Angel of Children. 

So when you take out the parts of those two versions of Metatron’s backstory that we know are not canon to Good Omens and mush it all together - this could be a narrative that comes out

But I want to take a quick dip back into his clothes before rounding this off. He is dressed in darker colors, usually associated with demons, there is just no way to ignore this. An angel with duality written into their clothes - An angel that can go into Hell - An angel that is supposed to guide souls to Heaven and yet there are none but there is an overflow in Hell - An angel that created the back channels.

Now hear me out - I know we are heading into a crack theory area.

Back in season one when Michael brings forward the pictures of Aziraphale and Crowley they say they got them from the Earth observational files - something that the Metatron would be in charge of as the angel tasked with the Book of Life - and ask Gabriel to use the back channels already knowing they were going to.

Michael is the only angel we really see have any connection to these back channels, through the phone and actually going down to Hell. Michael is also very quick to take up the Supreme Archangel spot without explicit permission, a role apparently the Metatron is able to assign. It almost like the Metatron has given them special permission before….

Why would Metatron have use for those back channels though? Well gotta put those human souls somewhere, not that he particularly wants to deal the predictable and dim humans - and why not make sure all plans are running smoothly for the inevitable next War.

There is also this concept called the Humbling of the Metatron - has it already happened or is that where we are heading? All I know is we have a lying***, manipulative, exploitative Angel on our hands

and I truly think that he has made his moves and revealed his cards - it’s only putting it all together

**I really don’t think the Metatron has access to this book like he is foretold to have, like he acts like he does - at least not anymore

***When he orders the coffee he asks for a dash of almond syrup but when telling Aziraphale he says a hefty jiggle - such a weird thing to lie about there Metatron

————————————————————————

This series is mainly just going to be exploring the character that is The Metatron with pretty much every route possible. I’m not trying to say which is the correct conclusion because this character could really go in any direction. This is just for fun. I tired to get all the religious stuff as correct as possible but there is always the room for error, things I’ve missed, etc

but anyway for the next part we are going to dive into another big influence over our series and characters, as Crowley calls them - Occult Forces.

part 2 is out!!

[sxrrandomfanfics]

100 Different Media To Write For in 2025

There may be more series that are more fun, but these are things that I know

January 2nd - Psychonauts "One-Shot" January 2nd - Death's Door "I am a Reaper" January 5th - Psychonauts "Baby Talking to Animals is Completely Normal No Matter the Circumstances" January 11th - Helluva Boss "A New Argument" January 11th - Mouthwashing "Fish in a Birdcage" January 13th - Psychonauts "Precognition" January 23rd - Slay the Princess "Diary of Jane" January 25th - Psychonauts "Love Hurts (you and me and everyone)" January 26th - No Straight Roads "You Don't Regret Me, But I Regret You" January 27th - Sky: Children of the Light "Stone Cold" January 27th - Rain World "Oh. That'll do it."

February 15th - Psychonauts "Earth and Sea Chapter 24" February 16th - OK K.O. Let's Be Heroes!"Sweet as Candy Chapter 42" February 17th - The Owl House "Weight of the World" February 18th - Tangled "Wash Day" February 19th - Pokemon "Don't Forget, You Still Can Fight" February 20th - Vampire Husband "Aren't You Tired?" February 21st - Digimon "That One Trope Where they Fall for the Pet and Not for You" Frebruary 22nd - DC Comics "Baby, it's Cold Outside" February 23rd - Steven Universe "Let Me Serenade You" February 24th - Abrahamic Religions "Immortal Curse Means Forever (But at Least You're a Bandage)" February 25th - My Ghost Friend "Can't a Woman Have Cleaning Boy Fantasies?" February 26th - Fire Emblem "Sorry, You Can Go" February 27th - Detective Grimoire "I Think Scars are Kind of Badass"

Things I could Write For

Sonic

Dark Cloud

Shining Force

Jentry Chau Vs. The Underworld

Dan da Dan

Undertale

Gravity Falls

Amphibia

Inside Job

Kill la Kill

Shin Megami Tensei

The Wizard of Oz

Ace Attorney

My Little Pony

Secret Saturdays

Generator Rex

The Pretender

Dungeons and Dragons

Cult of the Lamb

Powerpuff Girls

Dexter's Laboratory

Star Vs. The Forces of Evil

My Hero Academia

Yu-Gi-Oh!

Kipo and the Age of Wonderbeasts

Villainous Flags- All Paths Lead to Doom!

Scissor Seven

DragonTales

Clifford

Pucca

Crash Bandicoot

Spyro the Dragon

American Dragon Jake Long

Danny Phantom

Kim Possible

Courage, The Cowardly Dog

iCarly

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles

Ernest and Celestine

Spirit - Stallion of the Cimmaron

Watership Down

Second Hand Lions

Jumanji

Zuthura

The Little Mermaid

Aladdin

Hercules

Shrek

Madigascar

How to Train Your Dragon

Rise of the Guardians

Grimm

Xiaolin Showdown

Lili & Stitch

Atlantis: The Lost Empire

Treasure Planet

Dinosaur King

The Great Mouse Detective

The Rescuers

Up Up and Away

Sky High

The Princess Protection Program

The Wizards of Waverly Place

The Suite Life of Zack and Cody

Anastasia

Land Before Time

Adventure Time

Regular Show

Teen Titans

Static Shock

Batman

Flash

Superman

Law and Order

Grimm Adventures

Jimmy Neutron

Fairly Odd Parents

Spongebob

50 First Dates

The Princess Bride

Johnny Test

Dragon Ball

Code: Lyoko

Miraculous Ladybug

Avatar the Last Airbender

Totally Spies

Big Bang Theory

The Simpsons

Futurama

Terraforming Mars

Centaurworld

Maya and the Three

The Book of Life

Coco

The Bible

Genesis's Discography

Mitski's Discography

6Teen

Total Drama

Mao Mao: Heroes of Pure Heart

Big Hero 6

Baby Mouse

Calvin and Hobbes

Cavetown's Discography

Captain Planet

Ben 10

The Incredibles

Moomin

Spot the Dog

Between the Lions

Pinocchio

Snow White

Sleeping Beauty

Cinderella

Foreigner's Discography

Nightmare Before Christmas

The Santa Clause

Rankin & Bass

Warrior Cats

Wings of Fire

Yes's Discography

Chowder

Tom and Jerry

Marvelous Misadventures of Flapjack

Spirited Away

Kiki's Delivery Service

My Neighbor Totoro

Howl's Moving Castle

Castle in the Sky

Sailor Moon

Ducktales

Chopped

Kirby

Blue's Clues

7 Deadly Sins

Little Witch Academia

Delcious in Dungeon

Spy x Family

Kingdom Hearts

Frozen

Ancient Magus Bride

Inside Out

Star Wars

The Lord of the Rings (Rankin and Bass movie)

Aggretsuko

Klaus

Chess

Checkers

Star Trek

The Amazing World of Gumball

Cells at Work

Ouran High School Host Club

Hilda

Dead Endia

Bomberman

Theory Channels (YouTube)

Mario

Umbrella Academy

Phineas and Ferb

Full Metal Alchemist

Muppets

Song of the Sea

Wolfwalkers

Breadwinner

Meet the Robinsons

Beauty and the Beast

Fairytail

Splatoon

Project Moon

The Gregory Horror Show

Ever After High

Monster High

School for Good and Evil

Cursed Princess Club

He-Man & She-Ra

Legends of Chima

Smiling Friends

The Lion King

Mrs. Dalloway

Chikn Nuggit

Encanto

Infinity Train

Hero: 108

Golden Sun

Over the Garden Wall

Codename: Kids Next Door

The Frog Princess

My Grandmother Asked Me to Tell You She's Sorry

5 Nights at Freddy's

Among the Sleep

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Power Ranger

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101 Dalmations

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Odin Sphere

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Marry My Husband

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Arthur

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Hotel Transylvania

Beware the Villainess

Overlord

That One Time I was Reincarnated as a Slime

Soul Eater

Hajime de no Aku

Supernatural

Naruto

The Wrong Way to Use Healing Magic

The World God Only Knows

Devilman Crybaby

Blue Exorcist

HunterXHunter

Bob's Burgers

Geek Girl

Jane the Virgin

Emily in Paris

Jurassic Park

Jaws

Tremors

Friend's Fanfiction

My Own Fanfictions

[anamericangirl]

I've already graduated long time ago but I was wondering what is the relationship between schools and religion in your country?

I've heard about a thing in the USA called a Sunday School but I don't know how it works. Where I'm from, Poland, we have a class called ''Religion'' where we are taught Roman Catholic religion, the most prevalent religion in Poland. There would be sometimes lessons about other religions but they usually boiled down to ''Be nice to others and let's all get along.'' We would talk about other religions in history class. Ancient Greece? Greek Gods! Ottoman Empire? Islam. Poland before its Christening? (Yes, Poland ''becomes Christian'' when our ruler, prince Mieszko I, got baptized in 966. And yes ruler of the country doesn't have to be a king. We had few rulers who's never been technically crowned.) Slavic Gods!

What about kids who aren't Christian or who are but whose parents don't want them to be taught religion in school for some reason? They go to ''ethics'' class which boils down to ''Don't kill because it's a sin bad thing.'' etc.

Perfectly serviceable, right?

But even though it's not mandatory there are still people who think religion should not be in school at all. Because in their opinion there's already enough going on in school and religion class just keeps their kids in school an extra hour (In Poland classes are only 45 minutes and breaks are only 5 - 10 minutes long, with one long one, 15 minutes.).

Most people like or at least acknowledge that it's far more convenient that way.

It's not some small village where an entire school would fit in one room. How would the priest ask and grade an entire building's worth of children? (''Religion'' isn't taught by priests, nuns or catechists. (I think that's how you translate it.) We would get grades for reciting the prayers and other stuff, our notebooks and participation during class.)

But it might be because my school is religious even by Polish standards. Our Patreon is John Paul the Second. We have his bust in front of the school, almost every class has a cross and his picture. We have some pictures and drawings (made by previous students) of him in the hallways.

What do you think?

Thanks for the message! It was interesting to read about how things are done in Poland. I think for the most part it is the same here. Publics schools here can't promote or practice a particular religion, but they can teach about different religions (which mostly would occur in a history class and there wouldn't be a whole class on religion itself. That can be the case in college/university though).

However, there are private christian/catholic schools here as well and those schools can practice/promote religion and provide religious classes.

Sunday School is not an actual school that's just what we call church for children basically lol. During Sunday church services kids are usually dismissed to go to Sunday school which is just a class that takes place during church where they go over bible stories/lessons in more kid-friendly ways.

[rcttencore]

wait till you hear about this next nominee: KANG JUYEONG, born on the 13th of AUGUST, 1993 and bears a striking resemblance to LEE SUNGKYUNG. they’re a FOURTH year BACHELOR OF FINANCE student and RAISED FUNDS TO BUILD THE UNIVERSITY'S FIRST CHAPEL — impressed yet? rumor has it they’re hoping to be the FINANCE DIRECTOR IN MBC, but personally, i think they should aim a little higher — something like the king’s club, for one. now, that suits them a little more, don’t you think? guess we’ll just have to see if they’ve got the talent for it in our upcoming recruitment round.

erm so hi again!! :D august, 21+, swapping one mess for another! i watched this one edit of the roy family to charli xcx's apple and i was like wow i need this canon.... fly high naeon (k*lled her off like they did with my favourite character in the boys season finale but we don't talk about that).. anyways, this is judgemental, elitist, ew poor people, miss kang juyeong! favourite granddaughter of mbc's ceo, who only gives a shit about you if you're old money rich!

super sorry to everyone i've spent the last 2 weeks plotting with, but i promise we'll brainstorm and come up with equally fun plots because she will most definitely cause drama!! ‪♡‬ like this plot for me to double-text you or just drop into your dms again!!

as always more info below!!

personality

inspo: charli xcx’s apple, the glory’s lee sara (thank U gloss for this), gen v’s cate dunlap (juyeong would be a homelander i fear), basically every member of the succession family (but mostly shiv roy’s entitlement), hints of scream queens' chanel oberlin & euphoria’s maddy  tropes: million dollar baby, the hellkite positive loyal, meticulous, articulate, cultured, protective negative pompous, hypocritical, judgemental, elitist, condescending cunt sun, whore moon, bitch rising leo sun, sag moon, leo rising

tbh shes pretty simple. just your typical snobby bitch who thinks people should just stop being poor and will tell u condescendingly about it

strong belief in maintaining a certain social order (if gatekeeping was a person, it'd be her) & extremely elitist 

she’s very big on keeping a good image for the camera (in public, at least, she’s not stupid!). all about smiling for the camera, showing your perfect self but close the doors, invite her to the king’s club, and she’ll show her true colors 

sharp tongue, has the tendency to be very dramatic (it's the leo in her)

she’s the biggest fucking hypocrite out there! she’ll act like the bible is her religion, no sin but then she’s snorting coke off some guy’s abs

but honestly, if ur in her inner circle then you’re kinda set for life. she’ll literally die for you. would go to the ends of the world for u. you ask for the moon? juyeong will get it for you. 

the kind who would provide you an alibi no matter what like ‘babe your boyfriend just called and asked where you were, i told him we were watching a movie but idk where you actually are’ vibes 

her feelings about hyungseo: she thinks he’s gaudy and tacky. although she begrudgingly accepts his presence in the king’s club, she does not like him at all!

background

she’s her grandfather’s favourite child - he thinks she’s like the second coming of jesus or something 

but in reality, it’s kind of a self-fulfilling prophecy. he puts her up on a pedestal and spoils her rotten and she’s the only person in the whole family who wholeheartedly listens and believes him & his tradition.. so it kinda works! 

most of her cousins just write it off as an old man’s rambles and their families have enough money…and her older sister is the worst offender though she gets disowned when she’s sixteen for flipping her granddad on live television and just saying some nasty shit about the church her family runs (she gets written off because she’s a teenage girl right but there is truth to her words) 

as she grows older, there are things with her grandfather’s ideology that she doesn’t necessarily subscribe to but she likes the taste of privilege too much to act otherwise 

and she has her own set of values - it’s a mix of what she believes from the bible & what she’s been raised up with. do they contradict sometimes? yes! does juyeong really care? no, not at all! her moral code is whatever she believes to be

but one thing she keeps with her is that u should only trust and respect the generationally wealthy <3 the inner circle of the top 1% is life <3 family name is everything to her!

even with the king’s club, she got in via having connections who vouched for her and just generally made the rituals/ life easier lol 

she thought being in the king’s club would mean being with like-minded individuals but little did she know… people get in on the merit of hard work too! and not just their family names! ew! 

post grad, she’s working in mbc as a finance director (nepo baby vibes) 

her family is also going through shit after the whistleblower ratted them out for embezzlement and they’re going through Serious Investigations and… let’s just say juyeong is practicing escapism heavily (read: she’s pretending nothing is wrong)

plots

we can brainstorm but just some high level stuff! 

her inner circle please <3

people who have blackmail on her !!! like your family’s fucked. u want to make it worse for them? 

also people she does not respect and just has a general antagonistic relationship with !!

omg pls give me people who think her penance is due!! like she used to tell them to fuck right off because they were new money or whatever and now, your muse is like “who’s fucking laughing now?” [jojo siwa vc] karma’s a bitch

someone related to the plot, did something fucked up to hyungseo and juyeong saw but she’s taking it to the fucking grave bc she considers u a friend ~

juyeong fucks a someone she thinks isn't worthy of being in the king's club - alternatively, juyeong falls in love with someone she doesn't think should be in the king's club ^__^

[aprillikesthings]

Idk if this is insensitive to ask about so I apologize if it is, and triply so if I've asked before and forgotten which I may have.

I'm really curious if you in the capacity of a religious person have any at all She-ra related thoughts about divinity. I've thought a bit about that recently, mostly in the context of trying to come up with explanations for what She-ra herself is. And having no faith of my own to speak of to rely on, not that I understand as religious anyway, I feel my perspective is limited.

I seem to tend to end up with a kind of christian-ish model common in sci fi and shows like Xena during the 90's and 00's, which I think is also similar to how some early christians talked about the old religion: underneath the apparent reality of the many gods and magics and matters of the world is one single ineffable will, guided by ineffable morality but fundamentally benign. That might be Etheria but it might just as well be the universe itself. Either way, it's beginning sounds an awful lot like capital G God to me. But somewhere in the back of my mind that seems like a hopeless attempt to eff something which should be ineffable.

So idk like, if you ever think about she-ra and your faith in the same sentence I would drink that sentence like ambrosia

oh, Lord (pun intended)

so, disclaimers: I'm not a theologian and also, I'm tipsy right now lol

BUT

The 2018 She-Ra, as created by ND Stevenson, is in part a response to the specific kind of Christianity he was raised in: Adora's storyline is a refutation of the idea of a destined savior, and Catra's storyline is a refutation of ...well, Calvinism.

WAY more nerdy discussion of She-Ra being a response to Calvinism over here and I know I link that essay a LOT but it's just good

--and the thing is, it's nearly impossible to talk about She-Ra from the perspective of Christianity without asking "which Christianity?" Because as the link above points out, Calvinism is a specific (if well-known and highly influential) branch of it, and one that a LOT of people disagree with.

THAT SAID:

I seem to tend to end up with a kind of christian-ish model common in sci fi and shows like Xena during the 90's and 00's, which I think is also similar to how some early christians talked about the old religion: underneath the apparent reality of the many gods and magics and matters of the world is one single ineffable will, guided by ineffable morality but fundamentally benign. That might be Etheria but it might just as well be the universe itself. Either way, it's beginning sounds an awful lot like capital G God to me. But somewhere in the back of my mind that seems like a hopeless attempt to eff something which should be ineffable.

That was actually a common paradigm back in that era (90's/00's) among Wiccans/Pagans: that all of the gods were just facets of a singular, larger concept of The Divine, that all gods were just humanity putting faces on the ineffable, and I'm still not sure that idea is entirely wrong.

But you can't really apply that to the idea of the Trinity in Christianity without doing A Heresy--if you can explain/understand the Trinity, you're likely fucking it up. It's meant to be A Mystery.

(In both cases, I think if God is real, God is much bigger than our minds are physically capable of understanding, in much the same way that we struggle to understand, for instance, the size and timescale of the universe. One of my absolute fave lines from Paul's epistles is from First Corinthians 13:12, and probably the only time I prefer the King James Version: "For now we see through a glass, darkly; but then face to face: now I know in part; but then shall I know even as also I am known." Which is to say, we can't really understand God while we're alive but only catch glimpses. This link is to the Common English Bible translation of 1 Corinthians 13, and the CEB is more conversational than poetic, but tbh that whole chapter of 1 Corinthians is popular for a reason, and even in the CEB I can't read it without getting emotional.)

BUT

In my denomination (among others), there's a lot of emphasis on the Incarnation--which is to say, that God decided to be born as Jesus, from Mary's body, to live as a human being like us, so that God had first-hand knowledge of what it was like to be human--but ALSO so that humans could know that God had lived and suffered as we have. A lot of us (hi!) find the Incarnation to be a huge comfort. Like, no matter what I deal with, suffer, or go through; God has also experienced it, as a human being in a human body, and can empathize with me. Because it's one thing to think "well obviously if God is omniscient, God knows what it's like to be human," but it's another thing to believe that God has lived in a human body.

And a huge part of the Incarnation was that God chose to do that--and so did Mary, for that matter. God didn't have to be born from a human body, but he was; and Mary said Yes.

THAT ALL SAID

I ...don't think there's a concept of God or divinity in She-Ra. If anything I think ND would reject that notion outright, and I'm fine with that. ND, like a lot of people, has every reason to reject the idea of God, especially as defined by the faith they grew up with.

I think the closest thing to Divinity in She-Ra is the idea of magic--and it's not an exact metaphor. Magic, in She-Ra, is a neutral force on its own, but taking it away or destroying it is evil.

Shadow Weaver's supposedly dark magic can be used for good purposes (for instance, SW and Catra using it to teleport inside the Crystal Castle with the intent of finding and helping Adora). But also, Glimmer's supposedly good magic can be used to hurt/fight people (her offensive "sparkle" things used in fights).

But destroying magic is portrayed as evil. That's what Horde Prime did on Krytis, for instance; and the Heart was bad in part because it used the magic of Etheria towards destructive ends--saving the universe meant not JUST preventing anyone from using the Heart as a weapon, but releasing all the magic it had been storing for a thousand years, which brought a ton of new life to Etheria.

And I hope some of this made sense???

[goodomensjail]

Check out this video from the AMAZING YouTube channel “Religion for Breakfast” who is a religious SCHOLAR who breaks down biblical, and cultural religious aspects.

In this video he clearly shows us the only references to “Satan” and “Lucifer” in the Bible and this is where my theory that CROWLEY was an Angel associated with the “morning star” is who culturally goes on to do all the things on earth associated with “the devil” (tempting Eve and appearing to Jesus in the desert)

I think Neil Gaiman is combining some actual biblical scholarship, where Satan and Lucifer are never biblically tied as the same entity with some Paradise Lost, which culturally tied them together forever, and some original goodness for the good omens universe, which seems to place a supreme archangel closest to God over all the other angels.

In conclusion Crowley had the angel name Lucifer, and was the supreme archangel before Gabriel. Crowley, and unreliable narrator was actually the cause of everyone’s fall by asking too many questions which started seeding foment.

He is not “Lucifer king of hell” he is not a Duke of hell, Satan was still the big “opposer” who took over and lead the war.

That’s it that’s my essay

[mbrainspaz]

I wasn't one of those evangelical kids who got caught up in the emotions of the camp devotionals. I never really cared about the rapture, or death in general. Much less eternal life. The reason I stuck around all the way through college was because I trusted the family and friends who taught me all the bible stuff. They always told me not to trust them, so that one's on me.

They always said, "Don't take my word for it, read the scripture! Do your own studying!" I said to myself, "yeah yeah, cool. In theory. I can't read aramaic or ancient greek though, and I don't really want to spend years in school learning that. It's much more practical to have all these people I know I can trust because they're such good people who clearly have my best interests at heart."

Then I went to a bible college. For an art degree, but they still made me take a bible class every semester. Between meeting esteemed bible scholars and historians in universities on the other side of the world who did know ancient greek aaaaaaand becoming distanced from my old communities, I finally did what they'd always told me to do: I did my own studying. I never learned much ancient greek but learning how to do academic research helped a lot.

Wouldn'tchaknowit—my findings vastly expanded my knowledge from what I'd been taught as a kid. At that point in my early 20's I didn't feel betrayed. What I thought I'd discovered were earnest mistakes! An honest lack of understanding from folks who hadn't had the privilege of traveling and studying the way I had. I was happy to bring what I'd learned back home to them, and embark on new adventures in learning together.

Only one... little... problem. Turns out none of them wanted that.

They didn't want to hear about the fascinating history of biblical mistranslations or cultural analysis of American evangelicalism and how it relates to feminism. They didn't want to learn about the history of other world religions like Buddhism and the interesting parallels with Abrahamic religions. They didn't want to believe queer people aren't explicitly condemned by scripture or that the 2000 year old book they worship might not actually contain a fail-safe blueprint for life in the 21st century. They didn't want think about how much of the bible might've been tacked on by scholars & kings who used it as a tool for social control. I still believed in god and called myself a Christian at this point, after all that. I lost my faith in the people first. I opened my eyes and saw it all. I saw too much.

Any time I tried to share what I'd learned or gently push back against their teachings their condemnation was immediate and absolute. It quickly became clear that what 'studying scripture' meant to them was only ever, "we'll tell you what it means, and you'll believe us." Any deviation from their 'interpretation'—now plainly revealed to me as patriarchal 1950's American traditionalism dressed up in middle eastern farmer's robes and doing a VBS play production of an ancient culture they knew frighteningly little about—only branded me as a disrespectful dissident. I also saw Christians I'd respected doing all manner of dishonorable things. A missionary who'd once nearly convinced me to work with him in South America sent me a horrifically islamophobic manifesto. Church elders admitted to me that they owned city slums. Outwardly perfect couples filed for divorce. Bit by bit it wore down my trust. It broke the illusion that Christianity offered any kind of exclusive merit or made anybody better somehow. I started to realize they were all just as flawed and fallible as any 'sinner' off the street. Of course they were all quick to say 'we have all fallen short of the grace of God!'—but what's the point, then? These people I'd trusted with my soul were quick to admit that they shouldn't be trusted... then turn around and insist that they still knew what was best for me and my life.

Over the next few years it got to the point that they as good as told me to my face that the only way I could keep being part of their community was if I shut up and conformed to exactly what they believed. I almost could've put up with it except that that tacitly included being good christian wife with 2.5 kids who votes republican, lives in the suburbs, and goes to Wednesday night bible study to listen to some local septuagenarian who never set foot in seminary school teach me a moral lesson from the same damn book every week.

Like hell.

It became painfully clear they'd never truly cared about what was good for me or what would actually make me happy. Once I realized the horrible truth of my situation I only stuck around so long because I didn't want to rock the boat. I always liked the singing, and the sexist jokes from the pulpit were a decent conversation starter for whenever I wanted to try another assault on the fortress of my parents' ignorance. One day during Sunday morning song service my dad saw me reading a book in my lap. He leaned over and angrily said, "If you're only here for me, don't bother." So I stood up and walked out.

Never been back.

God and I were always chill, from the start to the end. We get into some heated moral arguments and sometimes we debate whether gods even exist, but what else are gods for? It's the worshipers who worry me.

[jurakan]

"The Catholic Church does not enforce a literal reading of all parts of the Bible. The Scriptures have many types of texts: prayers (Psalms), visions (Revelation), debates (Job), parables (parts of the Gospels), letters (St. Paul), and, of course, historical reports (Acts). But not everything in the Bible is a historical report. Writing more than a century ago, Pope Leo XIII (1878-1903) used a quote of St. Augustine when he said:

The sacred writers, or to speak more accurately, the Holy Ghost "Who spoke by them, did not intend to teach men these things (that is to say, the essential nature of the things of the visible universe), things in no way profitable unto salvation." Hence they did not seek to penetrate the secrets of nature, but rather described and dealt with things in more or less figurative language, or in terms which were commonly used at the time, and which in many instances are in daily use at this day, even by the most eminent men of science.

So why do a number of Catholics still have a serious problem with evolution? Most likely, some Protestant groups have persuaded them that they should have a problem. When Scripture is the one and only authority--sola Scriptura (see chapter 3)--then Scripture is seen to be completely infallible if taken literally. Years ago, many Catholics in the pews understood that evolution of the human body was somehow acceptable in Church teaching. What has changed recently is not Church teaching, nor science, but the fact that non-Catholic fundamentalists and Evangelicals now have an enormous impact on our culture, especially in North America--and so has their rejection of evolution, making Catholics feel as if they must be suspicious of evolution if they want to be 'faithful' in their religion.

As a result of this, the theory of evolution has become highly suspect, even among some Catholics. Lost in this debate is the profound Catholic truth, affirmed by popes and theologians from the earliest Church until today, that science can never conflict with the truths of faith--not even evolution (see chapter 29). There is just no room in modern society for a "King James Version" of science textbooks. In schools, we should teach science, not preach it! Pope John Paul II said it right: "Scientific culture requires Christians to have a mature faith."

-Forty Anti-Catholic Lies by Dr. Gerard Verschuuren