#Kind of weird to post this right after the polls though

[ceiling-karasu]

I think these are really cute the way they came out. But it was really hard to make them in the far off background using only a small phone.

They kind of look like sprites, which is cute, but still, I think I need to get a larger screen to work on.

Does anyone have some recommendations for a small tablet? Can tablets download Sketchbook Pro, email, and internet and stuff or do I have to get an iPad for that?

What’s the difference between the two? I’ve never actually used any before.

[spaceguy44]

2024 US Election Post-mortem

I need to get my thoughts out about the election. I'll split it into a few main parts. (This will be long) 1. Why did Kamala lose/Trump win?

There's 2 main reasons for the result.

1. The biggest thing isn't that Trump gained a lot (he did somewhat), but that Kamala lost hugely. Kamala ran an "strong" but status-quo style center-lib campaign. This was not the right move to capture the electorate in today's America. It hasn't been since 2012. People at every part of the political spectrum have expressed disdain with the way establishment Democrats have run things. People want change! They have since 2008. Obama convinced everyone that he represented change. Hillary lost in 2016 because they didn't get that change after 8 years, and wanted something new no matter what. Biden did a good job in 2020 of being somewhat of a change candidate, but it was really COVID that allowed him to win. I do think Trump would've won in 2020 if it weren't for the pandemic. Kamala had momentum at first because she literally was "change." Biden was hugely unpopular, and people didn't like the return to liberal status quo, even if he did do more than even Obama to bring (domestic) left-wing policies to the forefront imo. Kamala represented hope at first that we could get away from the Biden that everyone hated, and bring in a whole new kind of politics and movement that would take us out of the neoliberal malaise that was the again Biden. What happened in stead was the establishment decided that there was a contingent of Americans that were allergic to left-wing politics, and they need to be captured.

THIS IS THE MAIN POINT OF FAILURE FOR BOTH HILLARY AND KAMALA. I do not believe there is a (large) population that is inherently right-wing, and another that is centrist, and another that is left-wing. I do think there are some that you could never convince one way or another, but it's just impossible that so many people could vote for Obama, and then turn around for Trump if people had some sort of weird internal political compass that they adhered to regardless of policy. No, Trump (and the right more broadly) MADE his base. This is the other reason Trump won.

2. Trump did make some gains, though I believe the right campaign from Harris could've overcome that. I think the Trump gains are more indicative of what Harris lacked. Kamala tried to adjust her campaign to match an electorate. Trump didn't give a fuck. He said what he wanted, and people liked that. They don't care about decorum. They don't care about "unity". They want someone they think will "fight" for them. People saw Kamala bringing in the Cheneys and just saw another neolib that would flake on any conviction to grab a vote. People don't want a policy. People want a candidate with conviction. Trump was also adept at playing on people's fears and insecurities. He MADE them into Trump supporters by playing on those fears. Harris did not try to make Harris supporters by playing on fears (at least enough). She was best with the abortion stuff, but that wasn't the issue that exit polls showed people care about. The top issue was the economy. Yes, "the economy" is objectively doing better if you look at the stats, but people don't feel like it because prices are still high despite the buying power of the dollar recovering (inflation was reduced!). People felt that because corporations kept prices at pre-inflation reduction levels. Harris briefly flirted with price capping, which would be the exact sort of populist policy that directly addresses people's fears/insecurities and breaks from the status quo that could excite a mythical "Harris base" that maybe existed for 2 weeks.

It's the same with immigration. Trump created a "big lie" about the border being in crisis, and played on the truly hurting average middle-American's insecurities. You have a population that is hurting for corporate consolidation destroying small local business, that has been devastated by opioids, and is seeing the towns and culture they grew up with decay and seemingly leave them behind. Are Trump's policies going to uplift them? Hell no! Does he talk to specifically them all and directly address their insecurities though? Absolutely. In stead of addressing these people (these are the ones on the red arrow map that's been going around), she accepted the lie about immigrants and rejected making any radical policy change from the system that threw middle America under the bus.

I should say I am literally living in a small rural city in a deep-red state, so I know what they're saying. These people aren't necessarily bigots. Some are, but I think most think they aren't. I think anyone can be prone to getting caught up in a hate movement if the right buttons are pressed, and Trump deftly presses those buttons. What needed to happen was pressing the right buttons to address their insecurities and fears that doesn't rely on hate and scapegoating. This is what I think Bernie Sanders does well in general polls, but there's too much movement within the Dems to preserve the liberal status quo. That needs to change or, the Dems die. LIBERALISM IS DEAD. We address the fears that made people Trump voters, or democracy dies! Here are 2.5 other smaller reasons: 3. Sexism, Racism, and Religiosity. I will not deny that these do play a part in certain parts of the electorate. However, I don't think they're insurmountable hurdles in a general election. I think Obama's campaign is proof of this. But we shouldn't deny that there are a significant portion that wouldn't vote for Kamala for purely bigotry reasons. Hell, I know some personally. But I do think it is a mistake to blame these for our failures. WE LEARN NOTHING OTHERWISE! 4. Believe it or not, but there's just a lot of people out there that just don't care or avoid politics all together. These people aren't bad or deficient, but they just don't include thinking about politics constantly as a part of their lives. They think about the election for a few days, and then get on with their lives for 4 years and tune out everything. Generally, these people are privileged, though there's also some that have been so hurt by our system and policies, that they tune out in pure nihilism about it all. These people vote on vibes, they vote based on what those they care about support, and many just sit out the whole thing. Voter apathy is definitely a thing, and it hurst especially the left imo. I do believe the majority of people would loath Trump's policies if they actually knew what they entailed, so this apathy only takes away from the left. 5. Kamala did NOT lose due to the Gaza protest. She might have lost a bit of support by not being an empathetic foil to Trump's "glass the whole strip" rhetoric, but I don't think it made a significant difference. And I'm gonna be real with y'all; Tumblr is mostly full of it if they think they can accomplish anything with a protest vote for Gaza. I learned this in 2016. That action won't do anything, and it's too risky when a literal fascist is on the other side of the ballot. Yes, I hate that Kamala did not oppose the current Biden policy of letting genocide happen, but Jill Stein/no vote can't pressure these people in the establishment without hurting their campaign financing. The votes are in, and 3rd party votes would not have saved Kamala.

2. What happens now? What is a 2nd Trump admin like?Maybe this is a bit of copium, but I do think that Trump will still be overall very incompetent and unable to enact the worst of his policies. Terrible things will still happen (and I'll get to that later), but I think some of the catastrophizing is a bit overblown. Let's take the mass deportation policy for example. This would be a horrible campaign on the level of the worst historical genocides. He would need to create an ICE apparatus so large that it would rival the fucking gestapo. Just think of all the agents and infrastructure that would need to be developed to round up ~20million people and transport them to the border and detention facilities. There's no practical way to deport that many people. The logical end point is concentration camps. Yes, we have them already to an extent (I mean the euphemistically named "immigrant detention facilities"), but we don't have anything that could handle "mass deportation." Building the facilities, hiring the agents, buying the buses and trains, and executing the warrants all takes a lot of time and money. None of this goes unnoticed, and it won't go without resistance today. Congress still controls the purse, despite what the supreme court says about Trump's immunity to do whatever he wants. SCOTUS said he can't be prosecuted for committing a crime, not that he can break a constitutional rule. The margins are too thin in the new congress, and I genuinely do not think that he has the political tact to navigate around how much resistance he'll get. My main evidence for this is the border wall. He had all the support he needed within congress and his base to try to "build that wall." The GOP even controlled both branches of congress, and shutdown the government multiple times to try to get his way. They had a majority in the house his first 2 years. It meant nothing! He got a regressive tax cut passed, and that's about it. I know there's a lot of bullshit he can pull to push terrible things through, and he'll have ghoulish cronies that will be the actual brains behind things, but honestly, they're dumb as shit too. They're too evil for their own good. They will eat themselves alive through infighting and liberal resistance before they can start a genocidal campaign on American soil. That's not to say there will be some horrible things. Here's what I do think he'll be able to do: - Ban abortion nationwide either through the Comstock Act or SCOTUS. - Completely fuck up half of our federal institutions that keep us informed and safe (ie. dismantling or gutting of Dept. of Education, EPA, FTC, NSA, HHS, and more). - Allow for more religious integration into our public institutions like schools - Essentially turn our government into an oligarchy (or more of one than it already is) - Reverse gay marriage rights (overturning obergefell) and restricting the rights of LGBTQ+ in the public sector overall. - Exacerbate the Gaza genocide - Let Putin have his way with Ukraine - Royally fuck up the economy with Tariffs - Probably get us into some kind of overseas war - If he survives to the end of his term, I do think that our democracy will be incredibly fucked. Like, I think they'll be able to push through so many bullshit rules that we won't be able to come back unless an actual leftist populist makes huge rounds.

Overall, it's gonna suck, especially if you're LGBT in a red state. I think he'll also continue targeting undocumented migrants, but I doubt he'll be able to put together the infrastructure to genocide them. Yes, Hitler and his regime were incompetent too, but it was really the enabling act post-Reichstag fire that allowed for him to start pushing the policies that would become the holocaust. It was only at that point that he had no more resistance, and could order whatever he wants. We're definite not there yet with Trump.

3. What do we (the left) do now?Honestly, just stay vigilant, be active within your community, make connections (even with Trump voters), and don't give in to the despair. Once you're hopeless, it will only make it easier for them to keep winning. We fight against the fascists until the bitter end. The only endpoint of fascism is self destruction. I am a leftist, but I am not a revolutionary. I think armed action rarely leads to good outcomes, and history shows that. However, if we get a Reichstag fire moment or an enabling act moment, that's not the point to lose hope. If people start turning their neighbors into the gestapo-fied ICE, that's not the point to hide. These represent the time where politics should be abandoned, and an actual violent fight for freedom and liberty should begin. I pray we never come to that point. Hopefully, these next four years will look like a continuation of 2016-2020. We'll have a slow degrading of our rights, but if too many of those we all care about are hurt, we can come together and help to reverse it. I know things are super polarized and we all have our own little bubbles in society, but there comes a breaking point where too many people are hurt, and even the biggest MAGA head will have someone they deeply care about that is very hurt by Trump. This is my hope, though it unfortunately relies on things getting worse first before becoming better. 

[ladyloveandjustice]

i really wish people on that "does it like women" blog would only vote on polls for media they're actually familiar with instead of just basing their opinions on what others are saying in the notes... like if you haven't watched/played/read something isn't that what the see results button is for? personally i only ever vote on a poll i know nothing about if it's like "who's the best video cat: fluffy from jrpg #1 vs skrunkly from jrpg #2" and my mutual is strongly campaigning for skrunkly on my dash, because i figure that's just a silly fun thing. and even some of the does it like women polls for media i am familiar with i end up not voting in because i feel too conflicted about it. the soul eater poll is a good example actually, i want to say yes because imo maka is an awesome protagonist who's pretty unique for the genre she's in but like you said in your tags, there are also a lot of reasons to vote no! and this is coming from someone who loves soul eater and has both watched the anime and read the manga!

Yeah...it's weird to me. I don't see why that gives anyone more of a high to click yes or no rather than the see results button, like yeah it feels good to vote on this type of thing, but only when I have an informed opinion that comes from my own heart. And if you really want to vote, that seems like a good opportunity to uh, just check out whatever the media is. Even watching or reading for fifteen minutes will give some kind of impression that's better than just vibes or someone else saying something. It'll still probably be inaccurate in a lot of cases, but at least it'll be based off something.

I am fortunate in that I've watched and read a lot of stuff though, and I did instinctively click yes on like, Billy and Mandy based soley off the vague childhood memory that Mandy was straight up evil and I support women's wrongs, but there was actually probably a bunch of shit in that show I don't remember, so it's not like i can say I'm ALWAYS fully informed. And sometimes I use tags to refresh my memory. "I can't remember what this did bad...okay from the tags I now remember" I am by no means a purist, I just think the point of the poll is opinions from people who actually interacted with the media or at the very least know so much about it against your will through internet osmosis that you might as well have watched ten episodes (me and Supernatural) (I have seen plenty of clips along with fastidious episode summaries and story breakdowns and so many goddamn tumblr posts so that counts for me. I'll be damned if I don't have a right to an opinion after living through the indundation of 2013 tumblr. I didn't vote on Doctor Who though despite basically the same, that seemed like more of a tossup for whatever generation it was and I didn't feel even the massive amount of knowledge i've somehow accrued was enough to make a blanket assessment).

Anyway, even if it's not that serious, it's an earnest question that you're supposed to put actual thought into, and that's why I enjoy it so much.

I don't want to get too annoyed with it, just like I try not to with the results. At the end of the day it's the internet and just a difference in approach that I won't ever understand.

I like Soul Eater too, don't get me wrong! I have fond memories. The manga definitely fell off for me at the end (and I skipped over a lot of the early chapters because I'd seen the anime, knew it had cut out quite a few pantyshots, and I wasn't dealing with those), I actually prefer the anime original ending, despite how basic it was (especially in Crona's case god why did the manga never give them a break). Just nice to see my girl win the day by punching someone really hard.

But I enjoyed it and I still adore Maka. There's still no enough action shonen out there that have a female main character for it not to be kinda special. But god. imagine a world where it cared about its female supporting cast's development more than boobs. or storytelling more than boobs, in a lot of cases.

[splatsvilles-fashionista]

The most popular new gear of Splatoon 3 Drizzle Season 2022.

So at the beginning of April I posted a google docs poll with all of the 100+ new gear pieces introduced at the launch of Splatoon 3, intending to follow up on it a week later. Unfortunately, it didn't get much traction, only having 92 responses as of the time of writing. This made me a bit sad, so I just kind of forgot about it. That said, 92 responses are still something to work with, so let's take a look at them!

As a reminder, the poll let you pick multiple answers for each category, which makes the percentages look a bit weird if you just look at them in a vacuum. So when I give numbers now, keep that in mind.

That said, let's start by looking at Headwear! This is by far the spikiest category, meaning this is the category where votes were the most split. That said, eking out the number one spot by just one vote is...

The Cephalo Pods! (29.3%)

And yeah, I get it. A lot of headwear is very large and cover up a lot of your character, and often changes colors in a way you can't control. So why bother with that when you can just put these bad boys on to keep your look clean and simple? Not to mention, you start with these. They're one of your very first gear pieces!

After the Pods we come to a shared second place, as both of these have exactly 28.3% of the votes, and I think they have some things in common with the Pods, too.

The Ocho OctoPhones and the Teddy Band!

Note that neither of these cover up your head. A bit of a trend with the most popular gear in the poll in general. Headphones have always been very popular, and with that bright red, the gold highlights, and that sleek 8-design, these were sure to be a hit. I'm not surprised to see the Teddy Band so high up either, how can you say no to something that adorable? (Also I have to imagine there is some effort justification at play, considering just what you need to do to get them...)

Also, quick shoutout to the third, fourth and fifth place, which are all just one vote apart!

The Howdy Hat (26.1%), Retro BluFocals (25%), and the Bream-Brim Cap! (23.9)

Now, let's move on to Clothes, which looks very different from Headwear in terms of how the votes are spread out. This is also by far the biggest category, so it's natural that the votes would be more evenly spread, but there are still a couple of clear favourites here, and none are more obvious than the number one, which is...

The Orca Bolero! (33.7%)

That's right, a whole third of all votes included the Orca Bolero. I can't say I am that surprised, though, Toni Kensa has been one of the most popular brands ever since their introduction in the second game. Their stark black-and-white aesthetic actually mixes really well with the bright ink colors on display in turf wars, and they pull on a lot of real-life fashion trends I think really resonate with a lot of Splatoon's audience.

In second place, we actually have another shared spot, but it's a pretty steep drop compared to the Orca Bolero, all the way down to 26.1% each.

The Annaki Choker Tee and the Patchwork Bomber!

Outside of the Pearlescent Hoodie, we don't get a lot of accessories in Splatoon, and I think this alone gives the Annaki Choker Tee a lot of appeal. The shirt itself isn't half bad either, with a slick Annaki logo over a really nice dusty red.

That said, I will admit I don't quite get the Patchwork Bomber. It's a real messy piece, mixing colors and materials in a way I can only describe as bold, but I have to imagine that's the point. If you voted for the Patchwork Bomber, please sound off in the comments! I'd love to hear why you like it so much.

Finally, let's take a look at Shoes! This is by far the most even category for the most part, but it has a couple of large standouts, including the single most popular gear piece in the entire season by an enormous margin...

The Punk Pinks! (50%)

That's right, fifty percent. Half of all votes in the shoes category included the Punk Pinks. And I don't blame anyone, honestly. This is a new version of maybe the single most popular shoe model in the entire series, and they're pink! These were a surefire hit, and the results show.

The second place is behind with a whole ten votes, but it still holds a dominant position of its own in the category with a whopping 39.1%:

The Pearl 01STERs!

These aren't my cup of tea, personally, but I absolutely understand why people like these. They're really big and bulky and overdesigned, and if you like that then these are perfect for you.

After that, there is an enormous drop, all the way down to 23.9% with the Red Hammertreads. These are just some cool punk boots, with leather straps all over. I'm honestly surprised we haven't gotten more of these yet, because with a name like "Red Hammertreads" it sure seems like they're setting it up.

And that's it for Drizzle Season 2022! Next up is Chill Season 2022, and we've not thankfully gotten to more manageable numbers of new apparel. So manageable in fact that going forward I can actually fit them into a tumblr poll, so stay tuned for that!

[silentstaresfanficandfanart]

thinking of making a game i post on itch.io (gonna try to make it an in browser game?) for us to goof around with are you guys interested

my main idea right now is

game where youre trying to deal with weird yokai hauntings and things of that nature chose your own adventure but also it's a magical girl kind of thing where you transform and are secretly fighting them and helping them and trying to keep things peaceful, and depending on how painful it winds up being, having curse management akin to that keito fic i have where he's a magical boy be a mechanic

i would be using original characters and my own storyline and setting for it since i'd want to set it so if you WANTED you could chose a price to play it for (more like a donation though since it would probably be optional-) rather than having like, microtransactions and junk, i just think it sounds like fun. Feel free to offer suggestions and things like that or ask questions or say what features you'd like the idea of but know that if you DO offer them you waive any legal right to the idea and cant sue me for using them even though you probably wouldn't like, if you GIVE me an idea that is giving me the idea- like, as in giving me permission to USE it (and i wouldn't exactly want exclusive rights it's not like id be like AND NOW YOU CAN NEVER USE THE IDEA FOR YOURSELF MUFUFU no i'td be like just dont go after me legally if i include an idea because you offered it of your own free will knowing you would not get something in return and that i am not obligated to add in an idea or remove it if you give it to me- i just want like , chill vibes-)

mostly it would just be like, for funsies though i dont exactly expect this to be some hit thing and i cant gaurantee any quality level (again hence why its like a "you dont have to pay for it but like if you want to you can if i ever figure out how THAT works" thing

so yeah tldr heres the poll what do you think

[bluedalahorse]

musings before I go to the market

Thinking this morning about how of the YR character studies I’ve written by myself, I have one centered on Sara, one about August, one about Simon, and one about Felice.

I’m about to talk about kudos, which can feel kinda gauche, but I mostly want to bring them up from the angle of something that contradicted my expectations a bit.

So it turns out that:

the August-centered fic (published in June 2024) has the most kudos at 32

Sara’s fic (published in September 2021) comes next at 29

Felice (published in August of 2024) is next at 25

and Simon (from July 2024) comes in last at 21

I don’t want to draw too many conclusions about this, because it’s a very small sample size. But it’s interesting.

What really contradicted my expectations is that the August fic has the most kudos. Moreover, it’s a fic that takes a pretty optimistic view of August’s future and portrays him as a relatively decent guy who’s trying to do the right thing. I think some of this might be timing-related—it was written close enough to the aftermath of season 3 that the post-completion fandom surge hadn’t quite died down yet, and while August had his vocal detractors I also think there were a lot more fans in the fandom last spring who gave him grace and wanted him to grow. I do sometimes wonder if that undercurrent in fandom still exists, very quietly, and that anti-August sentiment is perceived as “universal” in YR fandom because it’s what select people are most vocal about. Are people more hopeful toward/interested in/just plain curious about August than they let on? Sometimes I want to believe that, but I also don’t want to be naive.

Sara’s fic having 29 kudos seems to be in part due to its longevity. It’s been around forever, which I think is what allowed people to find it and read it. It’s my first fic, but not my best fic. There’s some cultural error weirdness and some side characters who aren’t used well. Other than that, it’s written in a pretty polarizing format—verse and second person. But it’s a fun little Good For Her story about revenge! I also think this speaks to the bigger size of the fandom in the early days, and the fact that there was more interest in non-Wilmon characters.

I think of all the fics I posted to AO3, the Felice one is the one that got the most reblogs when I announced it on tumblr. It also brought in readers outside of my usual circle. I attempted a more traditional fanfic form here, and had fun playing with it. In some ways, I think of it as the fic where I was most itching to make a statement, because I just had A Lot Of Feelings about the part where fandom (myself included) often praises Felice for being a selfless and generous friend. I wanted to poke at that notion a bit. I wonder what kind of reception it would have gotten if it had been published at the same time as the August fic, like which one would have caught people’s attention more. There is a lot of professed interest in Felice—she won the non-Wilmon favorite character poll, back in the day, after all—but I always wonder how that translates to fan interest in stories centered on her.

The other stat that really surprises me here is Simon coming in dead last for kudos, because he is after all the fandom’s most beloved. I can see there being reasons for this, though. First of all, the fic is written in verse, which is polarizing. It was also published during Simon’s month (I had at first hoped to attach it to a prompt, but then second guessed myself about that) so I was competing with a lot of other Simon fics. It’s maybe the closest thing I’ve written to a traditional wilmon fic, but Simon’s relationships with Sara and Linda are put on equal footing, and also I am just… I have a very particular way of writing romance that may not be everyone’s cup of tea. So I feel like it exists in this uncanny valley between traditional wilmon fic and my usual YR fanfic brand. At the same time, the people who liked it seemed to like it a lot! So there’s that.

Anyway, I’m about to add Vincent to the mix as of tomorrow, in a serialized drabble format with multiple POVs. So it will be interesting to see what kind of engagement he—a much more secondary character—gets compared to main characters.

I feel like I’m wearing a little lab coat and goggles and such. Let’s do fandom science!

[ibelieveinahappilyeverafter]

The Mafia Princess Part VII: The Jacket

Update time! Sorry for the slow posting time on this one, but I wanted to take my time and not rush it since we're really getting to the good parts now! I hope you guys are enjoying this story!

Mafia Princess Masterpost

AO3 Link

Winning Result: Go with Desi to get a new outfit/jacket bought for her.

Reminder: The poll for the next chapter will be under the read more at the bottom of the post!

---

“I guess… a new outfit would be nice,” Elsa slowly said, not really sure if it was the right choice or not, but she figured she could always make a break for it and run if she needed to. He may have been a mafia boss, but he was still recovering from getting shot at a bunch of times, after all. She could outrun him. 

Desi gave her a smile that looked pretty normal before he was looking past her and raising his hand into the air, almost like he was doing that thing in movies when people waved down a taxi. “Alright. My men will pick us up just around the corner of this block, out-of-sight of all your classmates.”

“Thanks,” Elsa said, surprised he would actually care about what it would do to her already dead social life to be seen getting picked up in a suspicious black car by a bunch of men in suits. “So… you’re really okay? Because that was a lot of blood.” 

“I’ve been through worse.” Huh. Should that impress her or scare her? At the moment it was doing a little of both, if she was being honest. “You handled the situation well yourself, though. Experience?”

“I’m just that good,” Elsa said, pretending she hadn’t had a couple nightmares about all the blood and that she was perfectly fine and able to handle herself. 

Somehow, the look he gave her made her feel like he knew what was going on in her head and that he realized just how terrifying it had all been. She wasn’t sure if she liked that. Someone looking at her and honestly seeming like they got it. She was used to just pity, at that point. 

Thankfully, she didn’t have to say anything else, the two walking around the corner and Desi opening a door for her and guiding her into the back of the car. Now that she wasn’t in shock, she could see how expensive it was. It looked like the same one from yesterday, at least, minus any blood stains. 

The seats were made of black leather, though, so possibly it had just been cleaned really well. Who the hell made car seats with leather, anyways? Leather furniture was so uncomfortable! Plus all of the adults with it just ended up covering it with some kind of plastic- Okay. She was getting off-track. 

The point was that she was in a fancy car that was expensive enough to have the two seat rows that faced each other with a mini-fridge installed underneath the back row seat, the one she was sitting across. 

There was only one other guy in the car with them, the same one from yesterday that had spoken to her and taken her to the hospital, and he must have noticed her staring because he asked, “You want a drink, little miss?”

“I think it’s illegal to offer a twelve-year-old a drink,” Elsa said without thinking, which seemed to be a really common theme lately. Maybe she had been cursed. Before she could apologize and try to not get shot, the fridge was opened and there was a water bottle being held out to her with a very flat sort of look being shot her way. “Oh.” Elsa took the bottle. “Yeah. That, uh, makes more sense, I guess.” 

She heard that huffing breath of laughter, looking to Desi who was sitting next to who she guessed must have been Scotty. It was nice that neither of them was sitting beside her and gave her some space, even with as weird as everything was. “Well, there are a few different places we can take you to get that outfit. What sort of clothes do you often wear? What you are now?”

Elsa glanced down without even thinking about it. She wasn’t dressed in much besides some black jeans and a generic band t-shirt that was so faded she couldn’t even make out the name of the band. Elsa looked back at him. “I’m a foster kid. We wear what we can get.” Alright. That had been a little rude, she guessed. She also didn’t want to dive down into her foster kid woes and look like some kind of beggar or, worse, owe any kind of debts. “If it’s alright, I… really just want the jacket I had replaced.”

“Was it special to you?” Desi’s tone was a little kinder, something similar to pity, but not quite as condescending. It was nicer. 

“Sort of?” Elsa shrugged, looking away to instead fiddle with her water bottle and get it open. “I had been outgrowing it anyway so it basically didn’t fit anymore, but it was a gift.” 

A glance up showed that Desi was giving her his full attention and looking interested in what she was saying, and Scotty was looking out the window to where she couldn’t tell if he was making it seem like he wasn’t listening or actually wasn’t listening. Somehow, she felt herself wanting to say more. 

“It was a birthday gift from an older foster sibling I had a couple years ago. We didn’t even keep in contact and he left the system probably over a year ago now, but the jacket was still mine, you know? We weren’t exactly close, but it was mine.” It looked like he got it, but just to drive home the point she added on quietly, “You don’t get gifts much in the system. You don’t get things that are yours in the system.” 

The three of them sort of sat there quietly, Desi finally raising his voice, “Aidano?” He seemed to be talking to the driver, Elsa looking back to see they were actually driving. She hadn’t even felt the car move from where she and Desi had first gotten in. “The usual clothing place.” 

It was hard with how twisted around she was, but she was pretty sure she saw Scotty and Aidano both share some kind of look that probably meant something. “So, Elsa.” Desi smiled at her, still acting like he was talking to someone interesting. “If you could have your dream jacket, what would it look like?”

Well. If she had already shared her tragic backstory, she might as well go all the way, right? With that in mind, she took a sip of water before she closed the bottle and then moved her backpack to rest between her legs before opening it and, after shoving the bottle inside, pulling out her most recent sketchbook. She hadn’t been working in it much, so it was pretty beat up. Still, she knew exactly which page to flip to. 

“I guess my dream jacket would be something like this?” Elsa held out the sketchbook, letting Desi take it and feeling a burst of pride when the big time mafia boss looked impressed at her drawing. 

“You designed this?” Designed? Big word for just drawing a cool looking jacket, but she’d take the compliment. 

“Yup,” Elsa said, even more gleeful when she saw Scotty, who had still been pretending to not hear anything, snuck a glance over and looked impressed himself. “Drawing is cheap, easy, and fun, so it makes for a good hobby. I can’t exactly get clothes easy, since, you know, I’m twelve, so I just drew what I wanted. So I guess if I could have a dream jacket, it would be like that.”

“You’re got talent here, kid. It looks good.” Heh. She was pretty good, wasn’t she? She was pretty glad though that he decided to not flip around to other pages like other people would when she showed them a drawing. 

A voice from behind her startled her before she realized it was just the driver. “We’re here, sir.” 

“Thank you, Aidano.” Looking back to her, Desi smiled. “I think we can do something about getting you a good jacket.” 

With that he was opening the door and getting out of the car, still with her sketchbook in his hand, she noticed, and gesturing for her to follow. She glanced at Scotty, who just raised an eyebrow back like he was waiting on her. “Alright, alright,” Elsa grumbled, sliding over before getting out of the car, making sure to grab her backpack and take it with her. 

She barely got on the sidewalk before Desi was walking into a store, Elsa quick to follow and then immediately stopping when she got inside because whoa. It looked like one of those high-end tailoring places people in movies got their clothes from when they were rich. Bolts of fabric were lined up against the upper walls and everything was made of polished wood and curved edges. It looked sleek, cool, and expensive. 

Desi was walking up to the counter where someone in a fancy vest and suit pants was standing, a tape measure slung over their shoulders to really drive in the point she was somewhere where people made the clothes for a person specifically. Elsa followed him, but she was slow enough she could sneak some looks at some of the mannequins that did have outfits on them. She didn’t see any prices, and she definitely knew what that meant. 

Desi and the guy seemed to know each other, going by how warmly they said hi, and Elsa made sure to give it a couple minutes before she joined them at the desk, especially with how serious they looked to be after the initial hellos. It gave her time to look at some of the clothing more, already thinking up ideas for next time she drew.

When she finally got to the desk, Desi spared her a quick smile. “Matthew, this is Elsa,” Desi introduced, Elsa waving at Matthew because this was a very expensive store and she wanted to be on good behavior considering she already looked like she didn’t shop in places like this. Ever. “Like I was telling you, her jacket got ruined while she was helping me out and we’re here to get her a new one. I even got a reference photo for you this time around.” 

Her sketchbook was laid on the table and Elsa felt absolutely mortified that a professional designer was looking at her doodle of a jacket she thought would look good on her. “Oh! Did you draw this?” Matthew looked at her and looked impressed. “This is incredible work! I can tell you like designing, and your pallet to the side here shows a good sense of color.” 

“Oh. Thank you,” Elsa said even as she mentally scolded herself for doubting her skills because, obviously, she was a god at drawing and should be worshiped as such. 

She didn’t get to say anything else before she was being almost literally swept away and then helped onto a little stand with her arms held out as that measuring tape was used to take her measurements. 

It then hit that she was in a very expensive store getting a jacket custom-made for her and decided she was probably in another dream that she should just go along with. As long as she pretended it was all normal and fine, then it would be, right? 

It at least was interesting watching Matthew work, totally focused but still somehow answering her when she asked a couple questions about what she saw around her. She was really interested in that blue fabric that looked sort of like silk, but also had a really faint glittering pattern to it that looked really cool. 

She wasn’t sure if she was upset or relieved when she was back at Desi’s side at the front counter, her sketchbook being handed back to her and Matthew back at the counter and writing things down in a notebook faster than she ever would be able to. “Alright, since it’s a much smaller order than your usual, we should be ready to have it done and ready for her tomorrow for those final alterations. Some time after two, at most.”

She didn’t get to ask any final questions about how her jacket would look at the end before Desi was touching her shoulder just enough to steer her back towards the door, Elsa passing by another woman who had entered and, okay, fair enough, Matthew had work to do. She’d just get her questions answered tomorrow, anyways- Ah. Right.

“So,” Elsa said once they were outside, Scotty following them from where he had been standing by the door for probably the whole time. Seemed like a mafia thing to do. “We’re… coming back tomorrow?”

Desi chuckled and took something from his pocket before holding it out, Elsa shifting her grip on her sketchbook to take a white business card. It looked like it was for the store behind her, the name and address and everything printed on it. Flipping it over, she was surprised to see a number actually written in ink on the back. 

“You can come back yourself tomorrow and get it, no need to worry about strange men picking you up from school again.” Oh, thank god. “Payment is all taken care of, too, so all you need to do is pick it up and make sure it fits.” 

Elsa nodded, playing with the edge of the card before holding it up. “And the number is…?” 

“Just in case you need it.” Alright. Cryptic, but she could guess from that much at least that it was probably his. Probably. “Now. If you’d like we can give you a ride back home or even just back to the school. If you’d rather, there’s a bus stop just across the street, too.” 

Hm. For being a big time mafia boss, he sure gave her a lot of free will to make her own choices before just going along with them. It was better than just being told what to do like in every other aspect of her life. “I guess…”

[genericpuff]

a shapeshifting time traveler and his apprentice who works as a minimum wage barista get pissed because their perfect speedrun keeps getting ruined by two teenagers with a kill count

they're about to run attempt 9999 and the barista is terrified that his boss is about to end up in some Y2K situation

the time traveler is very old and really does not care for the pop culture references from his apprentice whose strongest skill is creating latte art

they don't even get the bragging rights of being the main characters but still have to do the job of the main characters because the actual main characters are too involved in their love/hate relationship to be any good at saving the world

this is time gate.

---------

OKAY BUT HONESTLY I've been kind of stressing over making this post not because I didn't want to follow through on that poll I hosted, but also just because like... it's original work! And it's original work that I've been doing for over a decade in relative obscurity. So it's a little nerve-wracking to be like "Hey guys! Go read this comic that I started drawing nearly a decade ago! It really shows!" especially when I'm doing it from an alt account (i.e. this one) that people know me for being relatively confident on. It's like being that "one kid" in show & tell with their Pokemon cards all over again 🤣 I kept trying to come up with some kind of post that would "justify" me posting about it all, but nothing felt "good enough" so I finally went back to this draft about Springlock and decided to use that as the icebreaker. It's now or never.

Time Gate is a dark fantasy series I've been working on since about 2007/2008ish. It's existed on the Internet in multiple forms, starting as a Zelda fanfic online in 2009 and then dropping all the Zelda stuff and turning into an original comic series in 2014. Since then its first installment, Reaper, finished in 2021, two hours before the 'untimely' death of Betty White that totally wasn't the fault of my main character who can predict people's deaths. Reaper's completed narration of the beginning of [loop: 9998] clocks in at over 2,000 pages.

Now I'm working on Time Gate: [AFTERBIRTH] which is a direct continuation of Reaper and is drawn in the more vertical webtoon style. Yes, the choice of title is intentional, funnily enough the episode featuring my main character bursting out of a tub of her own blood and bodily fluids only got removed by Webtoons for having "too much boob curve". So I covered it up with more blood and that got Webtoons' seal of approval. Webtoons is... weird.

This series is a love letter to all those "weird kids" who grew up wondering why they got dopamine rushes off of arguments and fights or getting in over their heads trying to grow up too fast. It's a love letter to the people who love hyper-analyzing convoluted and way-too-long narratives with overpowered characters who could only exist within the limitless bounds of the imagination.

But most of all, it's a love letter to the part of me that still adores dumb over-the-top weeb shit.

That being said, this piece of work is not intended to provide comfort, but rather, catharsis. Don't read it looking for any kind of guidance on life or interpersonal relationships. Its story and its characters are only concerned with what comes after - when the lights have gone out and the hourglass has run empty.

This series contains blood/gore and fantasy violence, and depicts adult topics such as post-traumatic stress disorder through a fictional lens. It is not intended for anyone under the age of 18+.

I have a dedicated Time Gate blog, so you might see some reblogs here every now and then as I start to use it more (though I'm currently resting through a hiatus, LORE | REKINDLED came around at the perfect time for me to have something new to work on).

As you may have guessed, with Reaper originally launching in 2014 (when I was literally 18) the comic has... not aged gracefully, at least in my opinion, and could use some reworking, at least the first few volumes (I'm still pretty happy with the stuff that came out around the 2019-2021 mark after I took a nearly 2 year hiatus).

Of course, I can't stop y'all from looking it up and reading it (the original version will still be canon even if it's aged so help yourself) but just know there's a dedicated redraw and rewrite on the way <3

And if it's not your cup of tea, that's fine! It's a completely different story with different goals from Rekindled. The main characters aren't saints and they're in a relationship I definitely wouldn't recommend anyone be in LMAO

That being said, don't be surprised if you hear the subtle heartbeat of Time Gate underneath the floorboards of Rekindled~

[wolfiafuntime]

Hero of the Devildom | My Hero Academia X Quirkless! Teen! GN! Reader X Obey Me

Guess who's back on their bullcrap? I am.

Anyways, I started watching MHA again and this crossover has taken me hostage. I wrote a bit of it before realizing it's gonna take me a while to get to the parts I really want to. I'm currently contemplating deleting what I wrote and just skipping to the MHA storyline, or keeping this... 6 pages and continuing where I left off.

There'll be a poll at the end of this post for audience opinion (does that sound weird? I didn't know how else to word it...)

 Where are you...? One moment, you're walking into Aldera Junior High to attend another boring day of hell with Izuku, and now you're... In a courtroom? With eight, tall, windows, seven long banners, and several men in judge's seats looking down on you. The man in the highest seat starts speaking.

 "Welcome to the Devildom, (L/N)... Oh, pardon me. Feeling a bit shocked, are we? Well, that's understandable. You've only just arrived, after all. As a human, it will probably take a little while for you to adjust to things here in the Devildom." The maroon-haired man spoke, his deep voice kind. You took a second to blink, before speaking.

 "Aw, crap. What crimes did I commit while sleep-walking to get taken to Hell early?"

 "None," The maroon-haired man replies with a chuckle. "In fact, your soul is far brighter than any Human I've seen before. Let me introduce myself: My name is Diavolo. I am the ruler of all demons, and all here know of me. And someday soon, I will be crowned King of the Devildom. This," He gestures to the room. "Is the Royal Academy of Diavolo... Though we just call it RAD. You're standing inside of the assembly hall, the very heart of RAD. This is where we officers of the student council hold our meetings and conduct our business. I'm the president of said council." He monologues, his expression becoming stern as he brought up his title and responsibilities.

 "That's cool. My name's (L/N) (Y/N), aspiring I'll-decide-when-I-do. I am the ruler of the things I own, and President of the Aldera Junior High Quirkless Club. It's secret, though, so you can't tell anybody or I'll beat you up about it." You say, holding out your hand, but not expecting it to be taken. Diavolo chuckles again.

 "Don't worry. Your secret's safe with me." He says, and you put your arm back down.

 "Good... So, why am I here, again?" You ask, eyebrows creasing in confusion.

 "I will explain everything to you." The raven-haired man sitting in the chair below Diavolo spoke. He had a stern expression, and although his arms were crossed like the Prince's, his body was much stiffer.

 "(L/N), this is Lucifer. He is a demon and the Avatar of Pride," Diavolo introduced, uncrossing his arms. Probably to make Lucifer seem more inviting. "He is also the vice president of the student council and my right-hand man... And not just in title, I assure you," Diavolo then crosses his arms again and laughs. "Beyond that, he's also my most trusted friend."

 An almost disappointed expression comes across Lucifer's face, and he shakes his head.

 "Flattery will get you nowhere, Diavolo." He scolds, before turning to you with an empty smile. "Speaking on behalf of the entire student body and storied school of ours... I offer you a most heartfelt welcome, (L/N)-San."

 "Yeah... No offense, but that doesn't explain anything." You say, and something lights in Lucifer's eyes.

 "... Interesting. This one is different from Solomon," He says to no one, before his smile drops. "Diavolo believes that we demons should start strengthening our relationship with both the human world and the Celestial Realm. As a first step toward this goal, we've decided to institute an exchange program. We've sent two of our students to the human world and two to the Celestial Realm. And we're welcoming four to our school: Two from your world and two from the Celestial Realm," Lucifer then frowns, and shakes his head. "So, I take it you've probably put two and two together at this point, right?"

 "Yeah, you don't need to be so condescending about it," You say with a sweatdrop, childishly refusing to make eye contact with him as you begin slouching. Although you can feel his glare. Before he can say anything, you straighten back up. "But wait, why'd you choose me? I'm Quirkless."

 "You having a Quirk isn't necessary for this program. Even if you had a Quirk, it would be no match in a fight against a demon. It would, at most, buy you another half-hour of living," Lucifer explained. "Now, your period of stay is one year. You will have to work on the tasks you will receive from RAD. After one year, you will write a paper about your exchange here in the Devildom."

 "I have to write a paper?!"

 "I am not telling you to write a doctoral thesis. You can take it easy." Lucifer assured. You sighed a breath of relief.

 "Oh, thank goodness, 'cause I don't even know what a doctoral thesis is...!"

 "Don't worry. It's not like I will abandon you all by yourself here in the Devildom. You need someone to look after you, and I think that someone should be my brother Mammon," Lucifer said, smiling with a glint in his eye as he spoke. But his own mention of Mammon made him start glaring. "He's the Avatar of Greed and... How should I put it...? Oh well, you'll understand soon enough."

 Lucifer then raised his hand, revealing that he was holding- or at the very least grabbed- a cell phone.

 "Here, hold out your hand," Following his instruction, the device teleported from his hand to your palm. Looking at it, you found that it had a red screen, with a white crow silhouette, and '66:66' for the time. "This device is called a DDD. It's a lot like the cell phones of your world. This will be yours to use for as long as you're here. Now, go ahead and try calling Mammon with it."

 Unlocking the device with a swipe, you soon found your way to contacts, and scrolled down to the 'M' section. There, you found a picture of a dark-skinned, white-haired man wearing yellow-tinted shades.

 "Yoooo." You hear Mammon lazily answer.

 "Yoooo." You parrotted, raising two of your freehand's fingers in a peace sign.

 "Are ya foolin' around? Who the hell are ya?" Mammon asked, urgency still missing from his voice.

 "I'm (L/N) (Y/N). Lucifer says that you'll be babysitting me for the next year?"

 "'Babysitting you'...? AAH! I get it now, you're the other human-- the new exchange student! Pfft, whatever. Ya think THE Mammon would come and protect ya just 'cause Lucifer said I would? G'luck with--" Mammon, in the midst of his goodbye, was cut off by Lucifer.

 "You've got ten seconds... Nine... Eight..." Lucifer said, his voice casual. He didn't raise it for a single second, but it seemed like he didn't need to.

 "YESSIR!" Mammon shouted, before hanging up.

 "Sounds like you had a nice chat." Lucifer said with a smile.

 "Yeah, he sounds super reliable." You state, sarcasm dripping from your voice.

 "You look even more worried now, huh." Lucifer chuckles.

 "Well, if you were suddenly brought to a strange place and then get told that an unfamiliar face will now take care of you, you'd certainly feel anxious. However, Mammon won't be the only one to help you out. So will his and Lucifer's brothers. And it's probably better that you do that instead of me, wouldn't you say?" The Prince said, looking down at his right-hand man.

 "Yes... As much as I dread the idea of doing so, you're right." Lucifer agreed, a look of pain on his face.

 "Oh, come now. Really? You should be honored that you get to introduce such a sweet and charming little brother like me!" A tiny, strawberry blonde-haired man spoke with a smile.

 "This one here's Asmodeus. He's the fifth eldest," Lucifer introduced, gesturing to his right. "He's the Avatar of Lust."

 "Wh... I can't believe you just totally ignored what I said! And not only that, you referred to me as this one. How rude!" Asmodeus huffed, his eyebrows furrowing into a glare.

 "Hmph. At least he didn't ignore you altogether. How do you think I feel?" The blonde beside him said with a sigh.

 "That one there is Satan, the fourth eldest of us. At first glance, he may seem like a responsible demon with a good head on his shoulders, but looks can be deceiving."

 "Aha, so I'm that one, am I?" Satan replied with a nod of his head. He then turned his attention to you, a smile on his face. "Nice to meet you, (L/N). I am Satan, the Avatar of Wrath."

 "The Avatar of Wrath?" You parroted.

 "It basically sums up what he's about. He may flash you a pretty smile like that, but you had better be careful because it's all an act." Lucifer explained.

 "If you continue saying such nonsense, you'll just scare (L/N). Don't take him too seriously, (L/N). Lucifer enjoys speaking ill of his brothers. He is the Avatar of Pride, after all." Satan said, a weird aura surrounding him. You brushed it off as his wrath.

 "Sure thing." You agreed. One of Satan's eyebrows twitches at your neutral expression.

 "Are you done?" Lucifer asked in a sigh, and you turned your attention back to him. "Now, the one there with the very grumpy look on his face is Beelzebub. He's the sixth oldest." Following his hand, your eyes soon land on a large man with carrot-colored hair.

 "Lucifer, I'm hungry." Is all he said.

 "That's too bad. Now behave yourself."

 "I'm Beelzebub, the Avatar of Gluttony." Beelzebub says, not really looking at you as he places his hand on his stomach. A second later, a nasty-sounding growl comes from it. You wince at the sound.

 "So..." Lucifer says to get your attention again. "There are seven of us brothers in all, and I am the eldest. Mammon, the second oldest of us, will be here soon. My other brothers aren't here at the moment, but... Well, we can get to them later. All in good time."

 "During your stay in the Devildom, six of the seven brothers will lend you their strength. To keep you safe, you are to stay with them at the House of Lamentation." Diavolo added.

 "What's the 'House of Lamentation'?" You ask.

 "It's where I live with my brothers. It is a rather spacious house, and it was originally a cursed house in the human world. So, I assume it won't be a problem for you- a human- to live there. Although we will all be living together, you should still have the means to reach us at any given time. All of our phone numbers are already in your DDD. And it already has a messaging app installed, but you'll have to add us."

 "I'll go ahead and send you a message!" Diavolo said, pulling out his own DDD.

 "Isn't that nice, (L/N). Now you will be friends with the future king of the Devildom!" Satan said.

 "... Ugh, I don't believe this. Of all the rotten luck..." Mammon groans, hands in his pockets, and body slouched as he leads you to the HoL. It's been a couple of hours since you've been brought to Hell, and it's, admittedly, been pretty nice. After Diavolo messaged you, you were introduced to a tall, green-haired man named Barbatos, Diavolo's retainer. Just before Mammon arrived, he took your measurements for the RAD Uniform, and handed you a credit card with twenty-thousand dollars on it. Lucifer explained that it was your allowance for the year, and that if you wanted more, you'd have to work for it.

 Lucifer also explained that the tasks you'd be doing for the next year were all dance battles. If you won, your soul got shinier, and that would help you resist the temptation of demons. It would, in turn, make you appear more tempting for demons, but you would be able to protect yourself using an app on your DDD called Nightmare. Which temporarily granted you the powers of the Avatars.

 "Why should I have to look after some human? It's insulting, that's what it is!" Now, you were following a grumpy demon back to his house. "That rotten bastard... Does he really think he can scare me into doin' whatever he wants?" Mammon then turns to you. "Just so we're clear... It's not like I can't say no to Lucifer, okay?! I only agreed to babysit you because, um... Well you know, because... uh..."

 "Because then he'd get sad and you can't bare to make your big brother sad?"

 "Yeah, exactly! The Great Mammon can't stand to let anyone down, especially his family! Oh, hey, we're here." Looking ahead, your eyes land on a giant-two story house.

-=+=-

Also, a short list of pros and cons for keeping this:

Pros:

Those unfamiliar with Obey Me could stumble into the fandom (it's how I did!)

(apologies for how this'll contradict the first point) Some things will be added/changed to make it new for those familiar with Obey Me

It will set up some of the (Y/N)'s powers, and a little something interesting Obey Me's MC/(Y/N) that I'm planning on making a major moment story-wise

Cons:

We have to wait to get to the My Hero plot. A long time, too, because it took me a while to write those six pages

It'll give me less time to decide if (Y/N) gets class 1a as a reverse harem

Less set up for a slow-burn subplot regarding (Y/N) (it's not the story moment I mentioned earlier)

[skrunglebeasts]

i was possessed and wrote this whole ass thing after reading about who was in the finals for @coolesthscharacter

TEREZI: TH1S H4S B33N 4 COLLOS4L W4ST3 OF T1M3. ROSE: Agreed. TEREZI: UNO ROSE: Swap card. Give me your hand. TEREZI: B1TCH TEREZI: DONT BOTH3R. YOU W1N ROSE: On two fronts. Looks like the poll lines up perfectly with the results of our little time waster. TEREZI: OF COURS3 TH3Y D1D TEREZI: 1M L34V1NG ROSE: Don't enjoy yourself too much. I'll be moving on to hand the win over to Roxy. ROSE: Not that she deserves it any more than I do, but I figure it'll be a kind gesture. TEREZI: H4V3 FUN W1TH TEREZI: HUH ROSE: What? TEREZI: DONT M1ND M3 TEREZI: 1 JUST SM3LL SOM3TH1NG FUNNY TEREZI: H3H3H3H3H3 >:] ROSE: Ominous. ROSE: I'll see you later. TEREZI: 1 WONT ROSE: Aren't we past blind jokes? TEREZI: Aren't we past typing quirks? ROSE: Don't… ROSE: Do that. ROSE: It's weird. TEREZI: TH4TS K1ND OF MY WHOL3 TH1NG TEREZI: L4T3R LOS3R

Rose and Terezi exit in opposite directions, not bothering to spare a backward glance. Terezi's chipper mood bothers Rose for only the briefest second before she puts it out of her head. The troll loves mind games.

As she steps into the next room for the final contest, she considers a dozen different metanarrative consequences of this sort of contest and what that means for the continuity of everything. When the contest ends does she disappear? Is she shunted into the ultimate self who's story will never be completed? What does it mean for her to have even gotten this far, beating out even Davesprite. Has the cultural gestalt really shifted so much that a sad ghost boy version of Dave is no longer appealing? And is shs to be considered seperately from each of the entities that embody her? What is she? Who is…

Wait.

A silhouetted figure stands against the lights of the inexplicable room. A single blue light shines from the head…

ROSE: Is that fucking Sans? SANS?: nope!!!

The figure steps forward from the convenient shadowing and reveals a familiar, red-clad troll with a messy mass of black hair. In her hands is a skull with a blue light shining from the socket that Aradia is using to obscure her face. Rose sighs, a bit annoyed Roxy hadn't made it here. Of course this is what Terezi thought was funny.

ROSE: Hello, Aradia. ARADIA: hi rose

Her chipper tone is punctuated by the sound of the skull hitting the ground as she tosses it aside.

ARADIA: funny, right? ROSE: A little played out, honestly. ARADIA: come on. you of all people shouldnt say anything about "played out"~ ARADIA: your post-canon arc is just copying the one i had as a starting point and recycling it ARADIA: not that i mind! ARADIA: i find it flattering ARADIA: after all my old story has good ARADIA: b0nes ARADIA: to build on ROSE: Make up your mind about how you're supposed to sound. ARADIA: hmmm ARADIA: n0pe 

Aradia puffs out a breath to blow some of her curling hair out of her face.

ARADIA: So did you have fun getting here? ROSE: Not really. ROSE: Your ancestor flirted aggressively with me, then got mad that I called her boring. ARADIA: yours was very nice and quite interesting ARADIA: shes both very cool and very much a dork ARADIA: i can see where you and dave get it ROSE: Hey. ARADIA: though you clearly take more after dirk so you got a higher percentage of dork genes ROSE: … ROSE: Moving on. ROSE: Vriska was Vriska about the whole thing and got upset that no amount of luck could save her from being the icon of Homestuck's ire. ARADIA: i dont think thats what it was at all ARADIA: maybe she was boring, too ARADIA: after all ARADIA: how can you find anything exciting about someone who has done nothing wrong? :) ROSE: … ARADIA: 0u0 ROSE: … ROSE: Okay. ROSE: Well. ROSE: Sollux didn't really want to interact with me and spent the whole time with headphones on and listening to a podcast. ARADIA: hehe, sounds like him ROSE: Davesprite was monumentally awkward and seemed to be in the midst of a breakdown about not being "really real" because Davepetasprite^2 was in the running. ARADIA: sounds like him, too ARADIA: first mistake of anything like this is attempting to apply any level of canonicity to it ARADIA: better to just calm down and enjoy yourself ARADIA: but i suppose he wouldnt be davesprite or any kind of dave at all if he didnt appeal to the sad boy loving demographic ROSE: Are you going to keep interrupting me? ARADIA: probably ROSE: I played Uno with Terezi. ROSE: That's it. ARADIA: neat! ROSE: Let me return the question: Did you have fun getting here? ARADIA: i did! ROSE: … ROSE: Any details? ARADIA: no ARADIA: ill leave those to your imagination ;) ROSE: That's a copout answer and you know it. ARADIA: youd be surprised ARADIA: a little goes a long way ARADIA: lets focus on the now ARADIA: how do you want to do this, rose? ARADIA: among the multitudes of possibilities, the many threads that spread out before us ARADIA: which do you wish to solidify as true? ROSE: Maybe I don't want to pick. ROSE: Maybe I also want that to be left to the imagination. ARADIA: then ill pick! ROSE: What ROSE: But ROSE: Your entire continued existence hinges on one fact and that is that you are a voyeur. A perverted observer who has no interest in dirtying your own mitts as you passively allow the narrative to continue on it's way. You do not intervene. You don't take action.

She screws up her face in baffled disgust and stabs one finger in the air toward Aradia.

ROSE: You don't choose.

Aradia's persistent, placid smile widens slightly. It still doesn't reach her eyes.

ARADIA: not choosing is a choice ARADIA: i think thats something youve always struggled with ARADIA: a lot of people do ARADIA: choosing no action at all is still an action ARADIA: existence itself comes packaged with the burden of existing ARADIA: by simply being you are acting ARADIA: your existence means nothing ARADIA: your actions are meaningless ARADIA: but they are actions nonetheless

She turns on one foot, kicking off to float up and rotate gently and slowly in the air, as if attempting a slow motion pirouette. The languid motion controlled and beautiful. It makes Rose want to throw something at her just to ruin the image in the same way a child wants to crack a perfect sheet of ice just to see it come apart. ARADIA: and my choice has always been pretty transparent ROSE: Bullshit. ROSE: Your motivations, your reasoning, your purposes. All of that has always been obfuscated. You hide behind platitudes and more plot critical figures, but you never seem to be willing to show your hand. No one knows what your fucking deal is. ARADIA: hehehe ARADIA: thats just plain wrong ARADIA: ive destroyed more lives to save a single session than you could imagine in both your attempts to break yours or to do whatever it is you were doing with dirk ARADIA: ive been a ghost, a ghost frog, a robot ARADIA: even in that period of time you say i only observed i still decided to fight lord english for the fun of it ARADIA: and i lived :) ARADIA: what happened when a version of you tried to attack lord english? ROSE: Mgh. ARADIA: theres a reason im here ROSE: And what reason is that? ARADIA: same as it ever was

Aradia floats up, arcing her back until she's hanging upside down, arms and legs hanging limply. She's still smiling. It still doesn't reach her eyes.

ARADIA: i mostly want to see what happens when this whole place breaks apart. :) ROSE: … ROSE: I want to kick your ass. ARADIA: then do it ARADIA: or dont ARADIA: either way ARADIA: i think youre gonna have a bad time ARADIA: CUE MY FIGHT MUSIC! ROSE: You motherfucker.

[fictionkinfessions]

This is a post about the current blog poll regarding ask games on this blog. You can find the original post and poll to vote on via this link below. Please do not send votes via ask messages.

Posts about this topic have the tag 'blog poll'.

https://www.tumblr.com/fictionkinfessions/724128639169544192/

This is long. Here is a read more.

Anonymous asked: sorry im not home and mobile search sucks or else id look myself, but is there a catchall tag for ask games? i think there is but bad memory lol. if not maybe there should be so people can block all games instead of each new one !

Anonymous asked: Suggestion for the ask game debacle: why not tag all those posts with one consistent tag like "kinfessions ask game" or something? Either in addition to or in place of the custom tags. That gives everybody's blacklist something to pick up without requiring someone to add a tag for every single ask game.

Anonymous asked: voted to keep ask games but consider just adding a catch-all tag alongside the specific game for blacklisting purposes maybe? the anon has a fair point with how many there have been lately that it can kind of drown out regular confessions but ask games are fun and it wouldn't exactly be fair to completely get rid of them. wouldn't mind a sister blog for them either though

There isn't a catch all tag, and that's a extremely good idea. I'm kinda kicking myself for not asking for feedback before making a whole poll about it. We'd still have the poll, but there would've been better options about what to do. Also for not doing that to start with.

Anonymous asked: i'm all for continuing the ask games, but can we at least LIMIT them? sometimes it feels like there's a new one every day, or like everything posted is a response to an ask game. it's obviously not stopping anybody from kinfessing normally, but it feels weird to only see ask game responses when the blog was originally intended for kinfessions

Anonymous asked: a suggestion about ask games: host one or two as events with loose but present time limits. kinda like this blog had for june, with mostly pride-themed prompts? it would probably require more moderation, so no pressure if you don't feel up to it mpc. we could even vote for favorite games but i can see it may leave someone upset bc their idea lost. right now it seems (to me. just a personal opinion) like this sudden overflow of different yet very specific prompts is a bit directionless. it's not necessarily bad for a community blog but could discourage a full "conversation"? of linked confessions, which i see as the point of ask games. this isn't to say there are no responses to posted answers - quite the opposite, actually! i just think having fewer themes would allow more unique experiences to be included, instead of splitting more subtopics.

True, there have been a fair amount, and it's been ramping up. Not a bad thing, it's nice that people have curiosity about other's canons and sources.

Seems like a lot of work, but doable imo. My concern would be actually getting people to vote for the ask games. Also if an ask game wins, but nobody plays it, then what? Do we just go onto the next one? Would there be a time limit? What if people send things after the time limit? I'd feel like such a dick for not posting it because they didn't send it in on time. This isn't really a final exam at school or your office job with time limits. Literally how do I explain it without sounding like a Super Serious Tool?

People do that for holiday things, you can't stop that from happening. The only reason I put a time limit for holidays is so nobody gets triggered after they remove a tag from their blacklist, assuming nobody celebrates Fathers Day 2 weeks afterwards. You know what I mean? Not to mention this blog is very active. People may not see prompts until long after the time limit, and they may still want to participate. Also who thinks up themes, if there will be any?

Though maybe we don't vote on them. Like you mentioned, people might get upset if theirs isn't picked. I suppose we could just do it chronologically, as they're sent in. I'm not sure how to manage this. Save the future ask games to drafts and hope I don't lose them? Probably.

Anonymous asked: Going to agree with the anon, there is a bit too many ask games ngl, like I like them but there is so many of them at this point and like I even blacklist the tags but they still get through. I just wish that there was a bit less of them or that there was a seperate blog :(

The thing about the auxiliary blog is that it won't have the same amount of traffic and might go dead. Not a bad thing, such is life. But I think part of the appeal of ask games replies and confessions is that this is a fairly high traffic blog. People want to be seen, even if it's anonymous. I wouldn't mind running a side blog, or at least getting it active enough to let someone else handle it.

Anonymous asked: Hello MPC! You don’t have to post this, but I saw that you were asking for opinions and I can’t actually find somewhere to vote on a poll (unless it was metaphorical? I can’t tell honestly), so feel free to delete this if it’s just taking up space- but I kind of agree with the anon who spoke up about the ask games. It’s not really a bad thing they exist, but when you have so many going at one time, it’s hard to keep track of and sometimes the pinned post/asks become incredibly long. It also feels like it goes against the whole ‘this is not a canon call’ mindset of the blog because it can and does spark up conversations between people, if that makes sense? It’s not a bad thing people are involved, but I feel like it takes away from the point of the blog a little. I think having the ask games be cleaned up and a new system put into place to make it easier to block the tag/find them would be super helpful, but I know that can be stressful. All in all, I’m sure everyone will support your decision!! Thank you for everything you put into this blog MPC 🖤

The voting poll post is here if you haven't found it already. Thank you for your input, you have some good points. https://www.tumblr.com/fictionkinfessions/724128639169544192 It's true that the ask game post is incredibly, tediously long. Even with tags, it's hard to ignore.

I don't know about the canon call thing, I haven't really seen people implying they should be contacted over x y z happening in their canon due to an ask game reply. Honestly I'm not fighting that battle very hard anyways.

I get the feeling that ask games are going to stay. But we did get some ideas on how to manage them better than their current form.

Summary of suggestions

Limit amount of active ask games per week or per month. Maybe 3 per week?

Create a catch all tag for ask game responses

Ask game topics per week or month. Maybe can be voteable as well?

Create side blog solely for ask games regardless??

[mrowmrowmrow9]

The internet is weird

I’m quite new to having any kind of social media account, having started out on ao3 before getting a Tumblr, and I think one of the things that confuses me the most is which posts people will like more than others.

It feels like there’s no way to predict it.

Like for example, one of my first stories I ever posted on ao3 was a series finale fix-it called A World Where You Can Be Both. To this day, of all my works it’s first in everything but comment threads and bookmarks, and for the life of me I can’t understand why.

When I look back at that story, I think it’s terrible. Everyone’s a bit out of character, the plot is weird and the writing is barely mediocre. But people liked it, more than others that I would say are better written.

I suspect it had something to do with the timing (right after the finale aired), the writing quality being overlooked in favor of the premise of the fic (Music Meister! Karamel singing together!), and the karamel fam being starved of content since lots of fic writers quit when Mon left the show.

(Just to be clear I’m not saying that I think I’m a shitty writer or something, I just get curious about why certain fics get more attention than others.)

And Tumblr posts confuse me in similar ways, too. Out of two karamel-flavored polls I’ve posted around the same time (I understand that gen posts obviously get more interaction), one has I think over 60 votes and the other has 5.

???

Maybe it’s because people just love complaining about the finale (same!)? Or they didn’t wanna vote on a bit of a spicy topic? Polls are anonymous, though.

As with the fanfic one, I guess I’ll never really know for sure.

My conclusion is as stated above; the internet is weird.

[officeobject]

My pet teenie simulator part 8!

After writing an essay on why you DON'T need therapy, to your teenager, you were still mad at him, even though he had just accepted what you said, so he said to you, that a good way to get you to shut the fuck up and stop being a bitch, would be to give you affection, so he gave you affection, by the way he thought you would want him to - well, actually, just what you most like, which would then be awkward, as maybe you DON'T, want your hormone-pet to give your favorite method of affection or whatever.

(Just realized that the last one is literally me sometimes oops LOL). Anyways, I personally really like weird stuff, but like, only when it comes to platonic love, so yeah, he's the platonic equivalent of "all over me", and I didn't realize that this poll would have that 😐.

ANYWAYS, today I got ignored 👍(a crowd is cheering in my head for some reason - like, as a sarcastic thing or something),

But like, it's okay, because today I talked to my grandma and life was fun and stuff.

OH, and I should mention that I wrote about something, in an overly long reply HERE: https://www.tumblr.com/officeobject/769418105753567232/nobody-thought-of-closeted-trans-women-when-op?source=share ,

And I have a Christmas tree right HERE - also you can make my own, and like, just reblog this post and be like "comment on mine <3" or whatever and I WILL, though do keep in mind that you have whatever days exist until Christmas, left to send a message, which I will only see THEN, and you can't delete YOURS but I can possibly BLOCK you or DELETE yours or something (just saying this in case someone who ISN'T a poll person, sees this and wants to send something mean), and I THINK they have an app, and you can AT LEAST, choose a Christmas decoration, to set up on my tree, so like, you're welcome to say the most personal love-confessions ever - also do please tell me if I'm allowed to publicly react, or to react and NOT post it, OR to blur your nickname there even though everyone can visit and see it anyway, because I'd prefer it if you'd NOT leave it blank, but you CAN - you can also just MAKE-UP a name, just for that, which I will like MORE than just leaving it blank - and yes, my brain automatically goes to some kind of love-confession, whenever it thinks of the concept of me having fans - like, oof, but yeah, here's my tree - I OF COURSE chose the rainbow one (I am how I am), and also within seconds or minutes of MAKING my tree, someone - no name, had already put up a decoration, and like, I have no idea WHY/HOW, nor if the STAFF does it, and I hadn't even POSTED about it at that point - like, I had just signed in and stuff, so ... well ANYWAYS, HERE IT IS: https://decomytree.com/home?hashedId=02dOi09QjAoH .

I don't really know what to say.

Also, NO, you can't SEARCH for any trees, so unless there's some WELCOME message, then ...

[notebookmusical]

Okay I just saw your post asking for 5 star reads and I realized that I actually don't have many..if at all. Like I can always find a flaw in some books or something I don't really care for in a book I'm reading..even if I overall loved it. But that makes me think it's not five stars. I also find that maybe I'll enjoy reading the book or the vibe of it more than the actual book by the ending or something..like I love the idea of the book more than the actual book as a whole maybe. That's kinda what I was trying to explain in my last ask a little bit..like being excited to read the book but then it loses me near the end sometimes I guess. But that could just be a me problem. Or it's a book I know I'll love but I also didn't love the whole thing. A good example is Every Summer After..I loved reading that book but it also has some flaws so idk..how could I give it 5 stars? Also..she announced her new book and I wanted to know what you thought about it! But the plot didn't seem as exciting to me this time but we'll see..and if I like Meet Me at the Lake. I see Emily Henry in a similar way..I enjoy reading her books but if it took me a long time to read, then it doesn't feel like it would be 5 stars either. Or if I like all her books the same, and don't have an obvious favorite, does that mean they would all just be 5 stars or more like 4? I haven't finished them yet but I know I will love them. I guess I'm more likely to give something that means something to me 5 stars..even if I know it's not as good and realistically should be 3 stars or other people would say it's just okay. There's always some scenes or quotes I really like in a book or mean something to me.. and sometimes I just read certain parts over but it's not like that for the whole book. Maybe I'm weird but I'm never like wowed after reading the whole book and I tend to rate things all the same anyway but for other people, it's easier for them to tell. What makes you give something 5 stars? Or what's the big difference between 3 stars..or 4 compared to 5? Would you still give something that had flaws 5 stars? Sometimes I can't tell what I would rate something..just based on what I said and I don't know why. Rating isn't that important to me anyway. But I've already told you the last book I loved..which is the Stepping Off Place..and even that has some flaws to me..but I still reread parts sometimes and still love it so I guess it's 5 stars to me. I'm excited to read the authors other book that's out right now at some point too but I wanna read it with my sister and take my time, so I can't recommend it yet but it's called Sharp Edge of Silence. Another book I'm looking forward to finally reading is called Tomorrow Tomorrow Tomorrow that seems to be recommended a lot with 5 stars. I haven't read it yet, but it seemed like my kind of book as well. Another question I wanted to ask you is..what point of view do you enjoy most..or which one do you read more of? I basically always only read 1st person and I didn't think that was weird until a poll on here said it was super unpopular. It seems like more YA and romance seems to be mostly first person and that's what I like to read so idk if it's just more of a genre thing. Sorry this is so long..and I know you haven't replied so take your time! 🩷

i feel like i give 5-star reads more liberally than most people, but it really depends on my mood! and my ratings definitely change, like sometimes i'll give a book a rating (like a 4 star, or a 5 star) and then think about it and over the course of a couple days change my ratings (usually lower). i don't think that's a bad thing though; ratings are very subjective! if it isn't a 5 star to you, that's okay! i've also noticed that i tend to rate books that my friends love/that are really meaningful to them higher, just because it makes me feel more connected to them, etc.

i've been so out of the loop that this is how i found out about carley fortune's new book!! i'm super excited for it!! and i personally have rated all but one emily henry book five stars, but i've also never read them back to back! i technically have an explanation on goodreads for why i rate things a certain way, but it really is just based on vibes! i think that nothing is perfect, and so i've definitely given books that are flawed 5 stars, especially if they mean a lot to me! i think it is a combination of: enjoyment &, if it's well crafted. for example, i gave a book five stars that objectively, is very flawed! not super well-written. but i saw so much of myself and my identity in the experiences of some of the characters that it made me cry and i loved it so much → five stars! if its a book that i struggled to get through, but is well crafted → 4 stars, 5 if its phenomenal. i definitely want to go through my goodreads and re-rate a lot of books, but that's a project for ... someday!

i've heard SUCH good things about tomorrowx3, and i really want to read it!! i just haven't decided if i want to audiobook it for my first time, or if i want to own a physical (and i have a ~ thing ~ about hardbacks, so i'd have to hunt down a paperback copy).

i am more of a 3rd person POV reader, but i don't mind reading 1st person if it's done well! i think it really just depends on the story/writing style for me 🤍

you have nothing to apologize for!! i love chatting with you!!

[the-jackalope-coffee-co]

okok info dump time: so the other day I posted a lot on instagram, including a poll (which, relevant later) and it got the attention of two people who played big roles in my childhood and queer awakenings, but who because of different things like moving and just being in different places, we never really rekindled the friendships we had (and I thus never told either of them how I felt). I’ll tell you about them, first, and then why I’m spiraling. Chronologically, I’ll start with G—I met G in 4th grade, and he was easily one of the few kids that was really nice to me. He and I didn’t really talk about it, but I always felt like he liked me, I was just too scared to ask him about it because he was my best friend (but I’d liked him, too) We both moved away, though, for fifth grade, and we haven’t spoken much in all that time (in 2016 we said like “hi” but it didn’t go any further) but we’re friends on a lot of social media. It’s unreal how attractive he is—he’s practically AotC Ewan McGregor. The other person, C, is the first person I had a crush on that wasn’t a boy. We met in 5th grade, they were also the first friend I made at the new school. They might as well have made the sun, and I still think that about them. They’re gorgeous, smart, and incredibly talented. Hell, I just tried to bleach my eyebrows because C thought it looked cool on me. They only recently followed me back on social media, even though I’ve been following them for a while (read: years), and the moment I saw the notification it felt like the air flew out of my lungs. I had a similar feeling when they replied to my instagram story, saying my hair looked cool, and asking me what kind of dye I used. I replied, but it’s been 24 hrs and C hasn’t even opened it. G, on the other hand, voted in a poll I posted (which, like, only 20 of the 90 who saw it did) and I reached out to him, and he’s had a few responses now, but it’s been only one sentence at a time: one not long after I sent a message, then once late last night, and once this morning. So I don’t know if I’m just really rusty at socializing in general, or overthinking, but I’m a little overwhelmed by feelings that only I might be experiencing. And I don’t know what to do about it, lmao. I can’t even fully describe what I’m feeling? I’m really excited to talk to both of them, but I’m really easily crushed by the idea that it might mean more to me that we’re talking than it might mean to them? And I don’t even know what it means to me, I just feel kinda algdkadjskajdhd ? - 🆘

okay so I think this is super sweet!!

but, I do think there's a little too much going on. You may be rusty at socializing, it's tough to do anyway, but if you start skimping, as with any skill, it gets harder. So don't worry too much, once you get better, things will feel more natural

the other thing is everyone is super busy right now, like life is just hella weird and kinda awkward for everyone. so if G isn't replying right away, could be work/school/pet stuff/whatever that's going that takes priority. It's likely it has nothing to do with you as a person, G's just trying to maintain a level of sanity. Same with C probably.

On the worst case scenario, they're just interested in being mutuals and low level friends. It's not the end of the world, though of course it kinda sucks. But the way they still want to be friends is encouraging. Just focus on keeping it simple and slowly build up to socializing more. If it would make it easier to do so in person, send an invite. Just say 'hey it's been so long, I'd love to really sit and catch up. Are you free for coffee or something sometime?'

This puts the ball in their court. It's likely they'd be open to meeting up again, just to feel things out. If things are awkward irl, you know not to attempt again for a while (or ever, if the vibes are really bad)

[tanadrin]

here's the notes i made on stuff i found interesting while watching these videos.

Sarcasmitron's videos

Part 1: How Ukraine's Fake Culture War Became a Real Geopolitical Conflict https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=exJ024Zdzdk

-"Until the bombs started dropping, nobody thought Ukraine was worth understanding; for the past 10 years, Ukraine has been the site of some of the worst journalistic malpractice in history."

-Starting place is the typical post-Soviet Eastern European state: restructuring, misplaced optimism, strongman leader. In this case, the strongman is Leonid Kuchma (1994-2004), who in the early 2000s is embroiled in some epic corruption scandals, including the murder of a journalist. Two of his subordinates are rapidly becoming more popular: Viktor Yushchenko, erstwhile head of the central bank, with a reputation for being unusually honest, and Yulia Tymoshenko, former natural gas oligarch who was pushed out when the political winds changed, and re-invented herself as an 'anti-oligarch oligarch.'

-Kuchma tries to sideline them, first by forcing Yushchenko to fire Tymoshenko, then jailing Tymoshenko; that didn't work, and when he fired Yushchenko, he formed an opposition party that went immediately to the top of the polls. Kuchma realized he could not win re-election, so he hand-picked a successor to run against Yushchenko, his PM Viktor Yanukovych. Yanukovych had zero campaign skills, so he turned the race into a culture war over language--spreading rumors Yushchenko planned to divide the country (possibly through some kind of federal plan), ban the Russian language, or even ban the Russian Orthodox Church.

-The real political divide in the country in the early 2000s was between (roughly) the Ukrainian nationalists in the west, the professional/urban middle class based in Kiev, and the monolingual Russian-speakers in the east; the first leaned toward Tymoshenko, the second toward Yushchenko, and the third toward Yanukovych. But since all three figures came out of the same administration, and had basically the same policy goals, Yanukovych needed a wedge issue to differentiate himself. He landed on the United States.

-In 2004, the US's reputation was plummeting, and Yushchenko's wife was American, so Yanukovych portrayed Yushchenko as a puppet of the US who wanted to tear Ukraine away from Russia and put it in NATO. This was a weird accusation, because it was Kuchma who had desperately wanted to get Ukraine in NATO, going so far as to send troops to Iraq to soften up Bush. But Kuchma controlled the media, so this narrative stuck, and attracted Ukraine's anti-Russian far right to Yushchenko. -This, in turn, made the east nervous, because though there was no real threat of ethnic violence, Ukrainian nationalism was felt as an attack on the Russian identity as "the people who liberated Ukraine from Hitler" rather than "the people who conquered Ukraine for Stalin." -The divide here should be understood like a US-style culture war, not a Balkan-style ethnic struggle. For politicians and oligarchs, it was mostly a tool for driving voter turnout--a political farce.

-But the Kremlin wasn't in on the joke; Kuchma successfully convinced them to see Yushchenko as a threat. Russia donated $300 million to Yanukovych's campaign, and sent him their best campaign professionals. The Patriarch of the Russian Orthodox Church endorsed Yanukovych, and when it was clear none of this was going to stop Yushchenko, they tried to murder him. That failed, too, so they tried to rig the election. -All the failed attempts to bias the outcome made the rigging pretty obvious; massive protests ensued. Kuchma was forced to choose between a crackdown and yielding; he yielded, and agreed to new elections, which Yushchenko won. This is the 2004 "Orange Revolution."

-From the outside, it appeared that Ukraine was both before and after this "revolution" still run by oligarchs. Was this really a revolution? Yes and no. -When we say the US is an oligarchy, we mean "there's too much income inequality, and we really need campaign finance reform." When we say Putin's Russia is an oligarchy, we mean, "Putin has a bunch of billionaires who have to act as his capos, or else." -In Ukraine, "oligarchy" is literal: everyone who gets rich, gets into politics. The reason is parliamentary privilege: if you have a seat in parliament, you can't be investigated and charged with a crime, unless the rest of parliament agrees to strip you of your privilege. Even a legitimate businessman will need that privilege to avoid being squeezed by a corrupt prosecutor with connections to a rival. -There is little class solidarity--oligarchs represent different sectors of the economy, and come from different parts of the country. -The Orange Revolution was in one sense a victory of one clan of oligarchs against another; in another sense, it was a shift between the oligarchs and the middle class. The lack of solidarity among oligarchs means oligarchs could ride to power by throwing their lot in with the middle class and civil society groups, so in Ukrainian oligarchy--unlike in Russian oligarchy--civil society gets to play kingmaker.

-There was one problem: Yushchenko and Tymoshenko seem to personally despise each other, and hate working together. Within two years, Yushchenko had fired Tymoshenko, and after new parliamentary elections chose over her Viktor Yanukovych--only to again get into a power struggle, fire him, bring back Tymoshenko, get fed up with her again, and try to illegally call new elections. -Infighting didn't change when the 2008 crisis hit, nor when Russia began cutting off natural gas in the middle of winter, forcing Tymoshenko to negotiate a new deal at a much higher price, opening her up to more attacks from Yushchenko. -In the last two years of Yushchenko's government, they were at each other's throats, setting the stage for Yanukovych to make a comeback.

-Yanukovych pitched himself as the candidate to get Ukraine into the EU. A major mandate of Ukrainian politics has been to both keep Russia happy, and to keep Ukraine on a path to greater European integration, for basic economic reasons: joining the EU would be really good for Ukraine's economy (including for the oligarchs, even though it would reduce their power qua oligarchs), and countries in a comparable position that have joined the EU, like Poland, have seen much better economic growth since joining. -As Russia's man, Yanukovych could maneuver Ukraine closer to the EU without angering Putin. He outright excluded the possibility of Ukraine ever joining NATO via a bill in parliament--a very divisive move. -Yanukovych also wanted revenge: he had Tymoshenko arrested, because she'd pissed him off in the past (criticizing him for some self-dealing involving state assets). This alarmed the EU as major democratic backsliding, which made releasing Tymoshenko a condition for further integration--so Yanukovych began a major international smear campaign against Tymoshenko, shopping stories to conservative media outlets in Europe and the US, making her out to be an anti-Semite and Putin stooge. -But again, the Kremlin wasn't in on the joke, and this campaign smeared Putin as a side effect of going after Tymoshenko. This convinced Putin that Yanukovich and most of his oligarchs had turned against Russia, and it was only a matter of time before a second Orange Revolution destroyed relations between Ukraine and Russia for good. -Yanukovych was oblivious to all this, and went on trying to court Europe, thinking everything was fine--until in 2013 Russia starts sanctioning Ukraine, and says it will keep doing it until it drops out of the EU negotiations.

-Europe and the US thought this was a trade war with fairly low stakes. Russia, on the other hand, thought this was an existential crisis. Russia's envoy to Ukraine said that signing the association agreement would "nullify Ukraine's statehood" and "lead to a Russian military intervention." -Yanukovych meets with Putin to try to smooth over the apparent misunderstanding; he comes away from the meeting requesting $50 billion from the IMF for unspecified reasons having to do with Russia. Europe and the IMF, not knowing how strong the threats had been behind closed doors, assume this is just a cash grab; they don't bite, and Yanukovych walks away from Europe with nothing. -But breaking this major campaign promise infuriated the sectors of the country that hated Yanukovych already, sparking the Euromaidan protests. But the crackdowns were so excessive that it spread the backlash, uniting opposition party leaders: Arseniy Yatsenyuk, head of Tymoshenko's party while she was in jail; Vitaly Klitschko, who inherited what was left of Yushchenko's base after he left the presidency; and Oleg Tyahnybok, head of the crypto-Nazi Svoboda party, who (like far-right parties across Europe) had found some success by moderating his party's image and selling them as a protest vote. -When Yanukovych freaked and tried to pass a sweeping anti-protest bill, everyone in Ukraine got scared, and protests spread even to Yanukovych's part of the country in the south and east. With his base turning against him, Yanukovych had no choice but to start negotiating--which Russia took as a sign that they were right about him all along, and put more pressure on him to just crush the protests. Shortly after, the shooting started. -Eventually a deal was reached where Yanukovych would stay on until elections, with the opposition troika as PM and deputy PMs. But at the last minute, just before it was due to be implemented, Yanukovych apparently got cold feet and fled.

-It should have been possible to pacify the protests once the troika was on Yanukovych's side. But one of the annexes of the agreement was that there would be an investigation into who shot who; the leaders of Yanukovych's security forces thought (or were convinced by someone) Yanukovych was getting ready to throw them under the bus. They decided to betray him first; someone in the chain of command between Yanukovych and the riot cops ordered the cops to withdraw from all government buildings, leaving no one between him and the angry protesters. -Rather than let the state collapse, even Yanukovich's own party voted to kick him out of office and install a provisional government. Yanukovych later turned up in Russia, of course, along with a lot of the former security service guys--who also showed up in Crimea, which was already in the process of being invaded. -It may have been true that Yanukovych was unconstitutionally ousted--but of course the remedy for that was to challenge his ouster in court, which would require returning to Ukraine, which Yanukovych refused to do. This gave Russia the pretext it needed to make good on its threats.

-Many of the country's news stations in the east were controlled by a pro-Kremlin oligarch; when Yanukovych fled, they started running scare stories about how the new government was full of Nazis who would make speaking Russian illegal. Russia also organized mini-coups in the capitals of oblasts Yanukovych had won, with those coup governments declaring themselves independent republics. -At the time, people thought these were spontaneous protests. But the phone call in which Sergey Glazyev, the Russian envoy to Ukraine, talked about cash payments to the protesters, was leaked. -It didn't work. You can't sustain a revolution with paid thugs. -But it did work in Crimea, since they had help: Spetsnaz units without insignia marched in, disarmed the police, and besieged the local military installations.

-The fake culture war that had originally risked just some hurt feelings now polarized into one side thinking the enemy was bloodthirsty Nazis, and the other side thinking the enemy was fifth columnists trying to destroy the country. -Ukraine is now divided; Putin's approval ratings are through the roof; a piece of territory nationalists have wanted back since 1991 is now controlled by Russia again; Ukraine cannot join NATO because of its outstanding territorial dispute. If Putin had walked away here, he would have gotten everything he wanted. But he didn't--why?

Part 2: A Short History of the War in Donbas, 2014-2022 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fQ_ZRBLFOXw -This video opens with a montage of satellite imagery showing Russia's buildup prior to its 2022 invasion of Ukraine, and various media personalities refusing to believe such a thing is possible and defending Russia (Jordan Peterson, Matt Taibbi, Glenn Greenwald, but also The Guardian and The Nation), and asks--why? This is plainly a reflexive, emotive reaction that was proved wrong in the actual course of events, and wasn't restricted to any particular point on the left-right political spectrum, so what drove it? -He points to the start of the war in the Donbass in 2014.

-After Crimea, the divide in Ukraine started to shift from a linguistic one to a generational one among Russian speakers specifically. Young people were getting news about Euromaidan from their friends or the internet; older people were getting it from (oligarch-controlled) Russian-language cable news, according to which Maidan was the start of a neo-Nazi anti-Russian genocide. -In reality, the new government was dominated by members of Yulia Tymoshenko's party, with Arseniy Yatsenyuk as PM. -Russia was now bussing people in over the border in new protests; the former Maidan protesters became counter-protesters, afraid this was cover for another Crimea-style invasion. So liberals and ultra-nationalists were now fighting paid protesters and middle-aged cable news junkies, not over actual policy but over completely hypothetical ones. -The western media was happy to repeat Russia's story about this being a spontaneous ethnic conflict, mainly because that's how it was in the Balkans, and this was the last time western media paid any serious attention to eastern Europe.

-But this wasn't enough to destablize Ukraine completely; so Russia organized a classic 19th-century filibuster. Not the thing where you keep talking for hours and hours--but the original filibuster, a kind of military expedition by volunteers from the Crimean invasion force willing to sneak into the Donbass without any official government support. -Igor "Strekov" Girkin led this expedition, bankrolled by far-right Russian billionaire Konstamtin Malofeev, and helpfully liveblogged it on a Russian forum for collectors of military antiques. -The idea was to capture key buildings in Donbass cities in the predawn hours, then invite in local compradors to claim they had taken them all by themselves, just in time for the journalists to show up a few hours later. After a few days of chaos, during which it was assumed everyone in eastern Ukraine would go over to Russia's side, Russia could then send in its army and bloodlessly annex the south and east. -Disorganized local groups also staged similar attacks on buildings in big cities like Mariupol and Donetsk, but since they weren't well armed they were mostly ignored. Girkin managed to capture Slovyansk, and in many places people just went on with life waiting for a negotiated solution. -The Russian army meanwhile massed at the border and… just waited. -The Ukrainian army waited too, in part because they were barely functioning, and in part because they were worried a crackdown would provoke a Russian invasion.

-This was a problem for Girkin, because Slovyansk was under the control of a company of men with no authorization and no experience in governance; it was under martial law but under a military with no chain of command. This resulted in chaos. -The first order of the "people's mayor" in Slovyansk was a pogrom against the local Roma; people started disappearing at checkpoints, including journalists and international observers; some turned up disembowelled in the river. TV antennas were taken out, to inhibit the spread of information. When Ukraine sent in troops, people on the Ukrainian side saw the Russians escalating first; people in the occupied territories thought it was Ukraine escalating first. That difference in perception became increasingly important. -Street fighting continued in western Ukraine, with considerable casualties. Russian media flat-out lied about the nature and cause of these casualties; an accidental death of 42 people in Odessa in a fire was turned into a deliberate massacre using guns. Oligarchs, Nazis, Mossad, and the CIA were blamed. Meanwhile in Western Ukraine, the shock of these deaths actually calmed things down--they were taken as a sign things needed to deescalate. -As the presidential election approached, the separatists began a massive recruitment drive which was not just local, including recruiting from major Russian neo-Nazi outfits like Russian National Unity and the National Bolshevik Party. Even some left-wing Spaniards joined in, where they fought side by side with American and Swedish neo-Nazis.

-With Poroshenko's election providing the government more legitimacy, Ukraine felt more confident about trying to take back the east by force. But the separatists had an unlimited supply of "captured" anti-tank and anti-air missiles, meaning the battle would be slow and heavy on artillery, fought mainly by volunteers with only a few weeks of military training (and which thus would consequently include neo-Nazis). -But Ukraine had air power, and no wave of pro-Russian volunteers swept up by local sentiment materialized. Girkin couldn't hold on to Slovyansk, and asked the Kremlin for help; when this help failed to materialize, he left. -The recapture of Slovyansk provided a window into life under occupation--when Girkin left, 40 or so people were still disappeared, some of whom later turned up in mass graves. It turned out few people in the town cared much about the Russian world or federalization--they had just assumed Russia would invade, and wanted to be seen supporting the winning side. -No massacres of Russian-speakers materialized, of course, which also helped allay local fears considerably. -Even here, Russia's government could have gotten everything it wanted with a minimum of embarrassment--all it had to do was call back its agents and deny any involvement. Instead, they escalated.

-Starting in July, the Russians begin bombarding Ukrainian positions from the Russian side of the border. When that didn't help enough, they gave the rebels more advanced anti-air systems, resulting in MH17 being shot down. -The downing of MH17 brought major sanctions against Russian companies. Russia decided they might as well escalate further; several thousand soldiers and tanks rolled into Ukraine, surrounding a chunk of Ukrainian forces and destroying them with artillery. -And… no one noticed. Russia denied they had invaded, and everyone just decided to believe them. Not only was there satellite photography from the Pentagon and Ukraine, but Russian soldiers posting from Facebook, with selfies, and Russians taken prisoner by Ukraine saying in interviews they had been ordered into the country. -America's pro-war, consent-manufacturing, imperialist press… mostly decided to take Russia at its word. The only publication that dropped the "allegedly" when talking about Russian involvement in Ukraine was Vox.

-Many Russians believed Ukraine. Russian soldiers fighting in Ukraine meant Russian casualties, and the Kremlin couldn't keep a lid on this. More and more independent media was shut down, and official media became more and more radical and unhinged. Russia was lurching from hybrid regime to more and more totalitarian. -But they couldn't sustain a full-on military campaign. Russia agreed to pull out in exchange for more autonomy for the east; yet again, this was another Russian offramp, to a buffer state in the Donbass, plus everything it had before. It had thoroughly shown Ukraine who was boss, and that the US was not going to save them. -But Russia launched a new offensive immediately after signing the ceasefire agreement, and reneged on the deal. After a grueling battle and the capture of the Donetsk airport, the whole cycle repeated again, this time with a gratuitous rocket attack on Mariupol that definitively turned the city against the rebels.

"And finally it seemed like, with 12,000 people dead, Russia would finally take offramp number 5. And they did. Sort of. Until 2022.

And we'll pause here one last time. Because it's worth noting that Russia did not win anything of material value in this war. The territory in question is economically crippled and Ukraine was already ineligible to join NATO. And the war made Ukraine both more militarized and more anti-Russian. But they did win, and win in a way that would be consequential for the world, because Russia accomplished something in Ukraine that should have been impossible. It invaded and brutalized a neighbor and came out with a better repuation than it had going in. Half the West was more sympathetic to Russia than to Ukraine, let alone the rest of the world. Russia had invaded a country in broad daylight, and most of the world was convinced it hadn't happened, or if it had, it was somehow Ukraine's fault, because they were Nazis or something. And it's worth marveling at the scope of this accomplishment. Imagine fighting a war against a country so good at gaslighting, that half the world is convinced you were at risk of committing genocide against speakers of a language that you speak.

And so that begs the question--how did they do this?"

-Russia's invasion happened during the rise of ISIS; Europe and the US aimed more for deescalation than for strong pushback; they just wanted this situation to go away. -Russia's tactical approach: "hybrid warfare." -By broadening the gap between when something happened and when western media reported something has having happened (like Russia invading Crimea), sequences of events could be presented out of order. Russia could act aggressively, trigger Ukrainian retaliation, present that retaliation as unprovoked, and then a week later when Russia's initial aggressive act was reported, it could be presented as retaliation for Ukraine's aggression. It didn't matter what occurred first, bc no one in the West was paying enough attention. -The invasion of Crimea on the 24th of February could be retaliation for a "fascist junta" that hadn't been appointed to government until the 27th. Russia could point the finger at Ukraine for not following the Minsk agreements, after it launched three massive offensives immediately after signing the agreements. The Gravel Institute can present a war that started in 2014 as having been provoked by a law that wasn't passed until 2019. -This had a compounding effect on populists: the mainstream media, which was already hopelessly biased in favor of Russia, was assumed by anti-establishment types to be biased in favor of Ukraine, because that was nominally the side the US had taken. So populists took even more extreme anti-Ukraine positions to compensate for the "pro-Ukraine bias" they were reading into the media. -But OP isn't totally convinced by any of this, and it still doesn't explain why Russia decided to launch a full scale invasion in 2022.

Part 3: Shut Up About NATO Expansion https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FVmmASrAL-Q -Hasty privatization was in part about Yeltsin's conflict with Soviet officials who had participated in, or been sympathetic to, the August coup. The reformers seemed to think their choice was between destroying the state, or going back to the Brezhnev era. Russia's experiment in social democracy instead became an experiment in anarcho-capitalism, with predictable results. "An inflation crisis, a parliamentary crisis, a street crime crisis, an organized crime crisis, an official corruption crisis, an alcoholism crisis, a banking crisis, a sovereign debt crisis, two civil wars, and an Islamist insurgency, all in the span of ten years. And the KGB hardliners who forced this outcome would spend the next thirty years blaming foreigners and Jews." -There was simply no prospect of Ukraine joining NATO in the 2010s. Arguably the conflict that really reflected Russian anxiety about NATO expansion was Georgia; but the Obama administration made it clear that Ukraine (nor Georgia) could not join without territorial integrity and a referendum approving membership, both of which were absolute barriers to Ukraine's entry. Ukraine itself moved on from the idea with the election of Yanukovych. -Then the Euromaidan happened, Putin killed thousands of people, and refused any offramp. Merkel and Obama kept offering offramps, in the assumption Putin had simply made a mistake out of pique, but every one was refused. "The people who made thier name on the Great NATO Sob Story like John Mearsheimer just kind of skip this part now. And that's why Washington hates these people. It's not because he's telling them hard truths they don't want to hear, it's because America did what he wanted for six years, and when that didn't work, instead of admitting fault, he just furiously rewrote history to blame them so he could pretend he was still right. And that type of careerist historical revisionism would be forgivable if there was nothing at stake but his reputation, but there is substantially more at stake now." -NATO expansion was probably a bad idea. But it does not justify or even explain Russia's invasion of Ukraine. Attacking Ukraine would not have reversed the Baltics' entry into NATO, but it also wasn't necessary to prevent Ukraine from entering--Yanukovych had already seen to that! Even if it hadn't, Russia could have stopped in Crimea to prevent that. -Russia also has, like. A nuclear deterrent! Which makes the idea it needs buffer states against NATO an anachronism.

Part 4: The American Origins of Putin's Madness https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7OFyn_KSy80 -EXTREMELY bleak montage at the beginning of this video showing all the same hypocrisy, defensiveness, bloodlust, christian nationalism, fearmongering of gay fascism, cries of European decadence, and incitement to genocide during the war in Iraq that is on display in Russia wrt Ukraine. -Some of the similarities, OP argues, simply arises from the fact that the war in Iraq and the war in Ukraine were both fought with the goal of destroying the liberal international order. The neocons set out to undermine coalition building, international organizations, and international law as a principle, because the idea that the US might participate in that kind of multilateral order denied to them the fundamental truth that the US was ontologically good. -One key difference, though, was that the US could elect a new president, reverse course, and pretend 2001-2008 never happened.

-Lyndon Larouche! Ex-Trostskyist, who combined extreme social conservatism with sympathy for labor and Keynsian stimulus, and built on this a towering conspiracy theory implicating the British royal family, environmentalists, the Fabian society, the IMF, and Henry Kissinger. -Forced to flee the US by an FBI investigation into his cult's fraudlent activities, he landed in Germany, where he founded the Schiller Institute. He published an intelligence brief at regular intervals, hiring a writer named F. William Engdahl. -Engdahl's own contributions to the conspiracist landscape include Bill Gates' vaccines being used to sterilize people, and writing about George Soros. Engdahl claimed Soros was personally responsible for all the revolutions of 1989. -This might have been forgotten except for a movement developing on the American left, obsessed with proving the innocence of Serbian dictator Slobadan Milosevic (incl. Noam Chomsky and Michael Parenti). Confused and upset by Milosevic's resignation and arrest, they latched onto the theory created by the Larouche movement that Soros had organized Milosevic's overthrow. But now Soros was a tool of the CIA rather than the Rothschilds. -Michel Chossudovsky, one of the left-wing writers in this group, who was finding trouble getting published bc of his 9/11 truther articles, started his own publication. He hired Engdahl and other conspiracy theorists for "The Center on Research on Globalization," which would go on to a lucrative partnership with the Russian government.

-Gleb Pavlovsky's failed attempt to get Yanukovych elected in 2004 is relevant here, because he pointed to the 2003 Rose Revolution in Georgia--around which American conspiracy theories, building on the figure of George Soros, swirled. All this was a Western plot, Pavlovsky explained, that used performance art (seriously) and mass protests funded by the CIA. -The 2005 Tulip Revolution also gets looped into this rapidly expanding conspiracy theory. According to Pavlovsky, Moldova, Belarus, and Russia itself were the next targets.

-In 2004, the Iraq War is spinning out of control, so Bush tries to salvage his reputation by tying the war to the idea of spreading democracy. Bush's cheerleaders started calling the Iraqi elections a "purple revolution." So the name "color revolution" stuck. -Putin became convinced Pavlovsky was right, and Bush was angling to overthrow him. So he put Pavlovsky to work to prevent this, making contacts with the conspiracy theorists at Global Research, including Engdahl. -Engdahl produces a grand synthesis of the Larouchite, pro-Milosevic, and Pavlovsky conspiracy theories, in which the American deep state has the ability to create mass protests on demand, and is using this power to overthrow every government in Eurasia that stands in the way of US geopolitical ambitions. -Hugo Chavez then takes up this conspiracy theory, followed by Iran.

-Needless to say this is all quite easily debunked; besides the Bulldozer Revolution not having anything in common with the other color revolutions, the Orange and Rose revolutions weren't revolutions at all, both being resolved by backroom deals between political elites. None of the motives attributed to the US in these conspiracy theories really make sense, and these color revolutions seem to happen only to corrupt democracies. Regular dictators survive them just fine, making them useless for regime change--they can only hit leaders without a consolidated regime. Plus, none of the logistics here makes sense--the amount of money being distributed to NGOs implicated in these theories is tiny, and it's happening in countries where the government often controls huge swaths of the media. The CIA does not have the power to set the terms of the political discourse here.

-The theory of color revolutions faded with urgency when the unrest in Russia never came, and Medvedev succeeded to the presidency as Putin's figurehead without much fuss. -But it persisted in the US. Soros was the target of a huge neoconservative smear campaign after his public opposition to the Iraq War; this criticism eventually rolled up the theory of color revolutions, citing figures like Engdahl directly. This conspiracy theory got major airtime on Fox News and attention from figures like Glenn Beck. Beck in particular was hugely influential in mainstreaming this stuff--just in time for the Arab Spring. -Vladimir Putin is convinced, according to State Department officials that had to mediate between him and Obama, that Obama orchestrated the Arab Spring through the CIA as a color revolution. Putin is incensed by Medvedev giving Obama permission to start the war in Libya, leading to Putin running for President again.

-Here things start to go downhill. Russia's stability wasn't built on a magical propaganda technique; it had been built on a belief among a large number of Russians that Russia was moving basically in the right direction. Putin's return felt like a step backwards. -When the government was caught rigging parliamentary elections, people protested. No one in the west saw this as the making of a revolution, but Putin did. He thought the color revolution had come for him, and that the moderates in his administration were in on it. -Putin fired his moderate advisors, surrounded himself with his KGB friends, and filled cabinet posts with far-right nationalists. -He changed his domestic political approach, making modernity and westernization the enemy. He was now the defender of traditional values. The 90s went from something bad in Russia's past, to an ever-present threat that might return if the west were allowed to get its claws into Russia again. -The EU no longer became an opportunity to pry Europe away from the US, especially during the Bush years, but the EU-US relationship improved under Obama, and the EU had criticized Russia for rigging its elections. It was written off as an irredeemable puppet of the US. This was a big problem for Viktor Yanukovych! -With no way to chart a middle course between Russia's desires and Ukraine's people's desires, Yanukovich was stuck, and it didn't help that Ukraine-Russia relations were being handled by Sergei Glazyev. -An antisemitic ultranationalist, he was brought into the government in the wake of the purge of Medvedev and his supporters. Glazyev is also the leading member of the Larouche movement in Russia. -Ukraine's relationship with Russia was in the hands of a man who believes genocidal Jewish bankers run the EU.

-Needless to say, Glazyev's insane propaganda just before and during the Euromaidan protests pushed the Ukrainian people more towards Europe if anything.

-After taking Crimea, Russia thought Ukraine was tipping slowly toward civil war. When there weren't any uprisings, Glazyev tried to organize them. But the central government and most locals simply ignored these attempts, and they amounted to little. Ukraine was not going to dissolve on its own. -This should have been a sign color revolution theory was wrong, and you cannot overthrow a government by paying off NGOs. After all, Russia had followed all the steps it accused the US of following. Instead, this was taken as a sign that the gay Anglo-Jewish CIA was working even harder to keep Ukraine stable. -The cycle of escalation in response to imaginary American escalation continued, leaving hundred dead.

-Putin rebranded himself as the bulwark against Obama's global regime-change machine, which had caused wars in Yemen, Libya, Syria, and more; the left and right wing press both followed his lead. George Soros and "color revolutions" became an international bogeyman--including, in perhaps the most hilarious example of a conspiracy theory coming full circle, Netanyahu's government accusing Soros of an anti-semitic plot to destroy Jewish values. -In 2020, Engdahl claimed the George Floyd protests were a color revolution fomented by the American government to overthrow itself. -Russia's propaganda campaign and influence in spreading this conspiracy theory wouldn't stop growing until February 2022.

-The US could not get Europe together for a strong response in the wake of the invasion of Crimea, and so settled for sanctions. -The problem with "hybrid warfare" is that it is an imitation of a conspiracy theory; its tactics do not actually work. With the Ukrainians on the verge of winning the war in August 2014, Putin sent in troops and put the MoD in charge instead of Glazyev, and tried to get the Ukrainians to give up European integration at the negotiating table. -But Ukraine saw this as a demand that it stay poor forever; even setting aside the principles at stake, it made more sense to keep fighting the war. -Putin simply could not understand this; he continued to blame the US, and his conspiracy-theory-addled advisors cheered him on. -By 2022, frustrated and caught between different factions in his government all unhappy with the outcome, he opted for a full-scale invasion to finally prove Ukrainian democracy was a Potemkin village.

-One of the weird aftereffects of all this is the way that the anti-Ukraine-war group in the US unites far-left conspiracy theorists and far-right conspiracy theorists, and assorted anti-establishment types for whom various elements of color revolution theory have some attraction. -The Russian government fundamentally just isn't that smart, and things got out of hand. -There's no negotiated offramp at this stage, because Putin is scared of ghosts--he is impossible to appease, and so also impossible to deter.

-And now the Larouche movement is making inroads in China! good times.

This series of four videos on Ukraine and the Russia-Ukraine conflict is very interesting. The first is basically just a narrative political history of Ukraine from about 2000 to 2014, talking about different political factions that were relevant in the country in the period, and how different internal and external pressures shaped politics. It's very helpful for understanding the Ukrainian political context, including just how recent and just how shallow the supposed tensions between monolingual Russian and bilingual Ukrainian-Russian speakers was in 2014.

The second video is an overview of the Donbass war from 2014-2022, which you might have been vaguely paying attention to at the time. But it's very helpful to have it all laid out in chronological order with the benefit of hindsight, especially due to the obfuscation of Russian operations at the time that made it hard to work out what, exactly, was going on. It's a combination of a good old 19th century-style filibuster (the military expedition, not the parliamentary maneuver), Fox News-style propaganda, and some (rather badly failed) attempts at astroturfing civil unrest--why Russia thought that would work becomes important in Part 4.

Part 3 is just an extended argument that NATO expansion is not relevant to the 2022 invasion of Ukraine, and while I already agreed with that assessment, it's nice to have it laid out in detail. The very very short version is that by NATO's own public criteria, Ukraine was simply not a candidate to join NATO, and had given up on joining NATO, and that had been painfully obvious since at least the Obama administration. Even more frustratingly, there were multiple points where Russia had an offramp to escalation, where it had gotten everything it could have possibly wanted from the conflict in Donbass, and it refused them all.

Part 4 is the author's attempt to explain why it refused them. The very short explanation is that Russia's government is led by idiots, who are very enamored of a flavor of conspiracy theory that has its origins in the LaRouche movement, and which has been bubbling in both left-wing and right-wing circles since 2000. In this worldview, the US government acting through the CIA (or the British royal family, or George Soros, or Jewish bankers, or whoever your bogeyman of choice is) has an almost supernatural ability to overthrow any government on earth by funding performance art groups (seriously), civil society NGOs, and protestors, and that almost every revolution, actual or so-called, since 1989 has been their direct work, from the post-Soviet revolutions, to Euromaidan, to the Arab Spring.

This belief, in its more overt or fragmentary forms, is incredibly popular, spurred on no doubt by historical instances of CIA malfeasance and actual aggressive wars waged by the Bush administration. But the problem is, it's bunk. During Russia's initial moves against Ukraine in 2014, they tried essentially the same playbook in the Donbass, and of course it failed miserably--you cannot actually astroturf a popular uprising. (The CIA has preferred to stage coups and assassinations, which are a different animal from color revolutions.) The separatists in the Donbass eventually had to be supported by a few thousand Russian troops and direct military aid.

But Putin, driven by his own paranoid misunderstanding of world events, the clique of yes-men he has embedded himself in, and his fear of gay Nazi Jewish CIA agents, simply got Russia in over its head. There is no offramp because Russia cannot articulate what its goals are, and because "stop trying to use George Soros to overthrow the Russian government" is not something the US can agree to, since they are not doing it. The only thing that might have prevented Putin fucking with Ukraine in the first place was maybe if rigging the parliamentary election in 2011 hadn't resulted in protests, in which Putin saw the specter of the hand of the CIA--but of course the US and NATO and the EU had nothing to do with that!

And to cap it all off, since the 2010s the LaRouche movement and its theory of color revolutions has been making inroads in China, so we have that to look forward to in coming decades.