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emotionallychargedtowel · 10 months ago

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Why hello! I don’t see why we can’t keep the Top 5 trend alive in the new year so…

From one chronic rewatcher to another, what are your top 5 most rewatched scenes?

Sorry this took so long, @wen-kexing-apologist! I'm just now getting back to posting a bit more regularly after the holidays got me totally off track, and this question brought up a lot of Thoughts so I've been chipping away at it for weeks.

So, um, this is the best question ever. Except it’s the meanest question ever, because I'm terrible at choosing between things like this.

I am a massive rewatcher, whether you’re talking about whole series, episodes, or scenes. Scenes especially. Why watch an entire thing when you can go right for the best part/s and watch them over and over? This is also one of the reasons I have way too many gifs saved on my phone.

I thought about coming up with a list that was based more on what would make a good post, and/or what would make me look less uncool, than what I actually rewatch the most. But I couldn't bring myself to do it. I wanted to be honest instead. So at the risk of seeming even more like an Utsukare obsessive and overall one-trick pony, I'm going to talk about the five scenes I think I've actually rewatched the most, even though four of them are from my perennial obsession.

The four Utsukushii Kare scenes are in the order they occur in the series, not from most rewatched to least. Then I'll talk about a fifth scene from another series that I've been pretty vocal about appreciating, and I'll mention some runners-up.

“who do you like, him or me?”

If gif posts are any indication—gifs are the smallest increment of rewatching, after all—some of my favorite scenes to rewatch aren’t that popular with other rewatchers. This one gets gif’ed, sure, as you can see. But it's not as popular a choice for this kind of treatment as a lot of other Utsukare scenes.

There are a few reasons this one is a favorite of mine. One is that I tend to like some jealousy in my romance. I have my theories about why it’s so appealing to me specifically, but I’m not entirely sure how to explain it. I also love a good aggressive shirt-grab. (Utsukare certainly delivers these regularly.) But the main reason I keep coming back to this moment is that in just a few sentences, a bunch of character development happens. Well, I guess it would be more correct to call it character revelation. This is the first time we really see this side of Kiyoi, and in that respect, it foreshadows the big perspective shift that’s just around the corner. The viewer picks up a lot of hints that Kiyoi has feelings for Hira prior to this point (even if Hira remains stubbornly oblivious to them). We’ve even seen Kiyoi kiss Hira already (even if he did push him to the ground a split second later). But this is the first time we see such direct evidence of the strength of his feelings for Hira. Kiyoi is so unguarded for this brief moment. The mask slips and what’s underneath is total desperation.

Hira, of course, misses the real meaning of what Kiyoi is saying despite how obvious it is. Which means it's also the viewers’ first indication of how intensely Hira clings to his favored view of reality in the face of evidence to the contrary.

"sorry I like you"

This is another scene where so much is happening in a short span, all because Kiyoi got desperate enough to talk about all of the unspoken bullshit between him and Hira. As usual, Hira doesn’t get it. But he might be starting to.

This scene is pretty rough watching in some ways. When this episode first aired and it ended with this scene followed by each of them on their own and feeling terrible, I was a bit of a mess. It was silly of me to worry. There were plenty of favorable signs in the preview for the finale. I knew the novels had a happy ending. But it was just so sad and so real that it got to me anyway. But I also enjoyed it, because for an obsessive analyzer like myself, seeing these important relationship dynamics finally come to the surface in such concentrated form was fascinating. It was also a relief to see things out in the open.

Both leads turn in such great performances here. Yagi Yusei really steps up. It’s even more impressive given his relative lack of acting experience. His performance is so raw and affecting. If he had been less vulnerable, Kiyoi’s point about how contradictory Hira’s actions and statements are could seem like a kind of “gotcha” moment designed to win an argument--like he was pointing out that Hira was hypocritical in a bid to score points. Instead, Yagi shows viewers how deeply being caught in this double bind with Hira has hurt Kiyoi.

Hagiwara Riku, in contrast, portrays Hira as so confused that he’s basically dissociated. Hira has a really strong tendency to see the world in whatever way suits him, regardless of the truth. Kiyoi’s words force Hira to set his usual narrative aside and see how much clinging to it is hurting the person he claims to love, and it throws him off to such an extent that he seems to be experiencing a form of psychomotor slowing. He looks like he’s moving through molasses. He can’t form sentences, or at times, even words. His normally expressive eyes seem like they’ve shrunk to half their normal size. He’s really come unmoored, and it shows. The more I think about Hagiwara’s work in this scene the more impressed I am by the insight and physical control he had to bring to bear in order for it to work.

Of course, if I watched this scene on its own habitually, this level of blorbo distress might take a toll on my mental health. Which is why I usually follow it up with…

"I'm not going to kiss you for a while"

I’m busting out the bullet points for this one because otherwise it might take me all day.

This scene works on so many levels!

Well, the main ones are:

Relationship progress! Character growth!

The whole kiss fakeout thing is hot

Hira gets some payback and frankly, he deserves it

The other highlights for me are:

Even after repeated viewings and knowing very well what happened in the story, I still feel kind of relieved to see that Kiyoi came back, especially right after rewatching the scene prior to this one.

When Kiyoi asks Hira why he thinks he came home and he says, “to punch me?" he does it in the most weirdly cute way.

Kiyoi’s absolutely lethal snotty face/voice when he responds to the possibility of punching Hira with “maybe” is so perfect that it's hard not to think that Hira might have a point about this whole King deal.

Hira apologizes and it’s actually sincere and not just some knee-jerk bullshit.

The way Hira closes his eyes and waits for Kiyoi to smack him is a rare case of him actually letting go and putting himself in Kiyoi’s hands instead of his usual topping-from-the-bottom thing.

More about the kiss fakeout:

Hagiwara does a great job of telegraphing Hira’s expectant response. In scenes where two characters are going to kiss but get interrupted, it's not uncommon to see a kind of hesitation or other subtle signal that the actor knows the kiss isn't going to happen. But there's none of that here. Hagiwara even does this sort of gulp/swallow thing like he thinks the kiss is going to start any moment. When the kiss doesn't materialize, he nails an absolutely pitifiul sad puppy expression.

Kiyoi’s vulnerable voice and facial expression when he explains about the kissing boundary thing is so sincere and cute. Could he be any more different from season 1 episode 1 Kiyoi?

I’ve written about how the no-kissing-until-Hira-takes-Kiyoi-seriously policy might seem like a controlling move or an inappropriate ultimatum to some viewers but it actually better resembles what Harriet Lerner calls a “bottom line,” resulting in a boundary that is not only justifiable but downright healthy…or almost healthy, at least. It's a bit on the extreme side, and the fakeout part remains a little mean. But they're understandable given what Hira has put Kiyoi through.

Here's my s2e4 writeup that includes that discussion:

“sorry, Kiyoi”

So, I’ve already written quite a bit about this scene. In one instance, I wrote a propaganda blurb when it was in bl brackets’s kiss bracket.

Here's the original blurb I wrote for @bl-bracket when I nominated the scene, as used in the post where people voted:

Hira and Kiyoi Final Kiss: "It’s an important plot point (because Kiyoi has said he won’t kiss Hira until he stops putting him on a pedestal and now Hira is making progress on that front, and because Hira hasn’t initiated physical stuff in the past, and initiating is itself a way of treating Kiyoi more like an equal). It’s also just a really well-acted and effectively shot kiss, and as a result it communicates so much about the characters and shows a side of their relationship not portrayed elsewhere in the show. And of course, it’s super hot. That includes the kind of weird but suggestive details that are typical of the show, like Hira passing candy/candy spit to Kiyoi through the kiss and then switching into this really distinct sexy voice that makes it sound almost as if he’s changing personalities."

And here's an additional, longer propaganda post I wrote to lobby for votes:

One of the points I tried to make in that post about why this scene is special was that it really does represent a leap forward in how both leads portrayed intimacy in this series. Prior to this scene, viewers had seen a dead fish kiss on graduation day, a more intense makeout situation in the season 1 finale that was shot so impressionistically that it was often hard to tell exactly what the actors were doing, and some interrupted kisses earlier in season 2. And then this happened. Here's a quote from what I wrote previously:

Personally, despite being a fan of both actors and thinking they did amazing work on the series, until I saw this scene I really didn't know if they had it in them, if they could actually pull off something that felt real. But they brought it. They're not holding back. As opposed to more stylized kisses you see in BLs and other romance dramas sometimes, I found it very naturalistic, like the way a couple of real kids in their early 20s would kiss.

So, yeah. I thought it showed real growth on the part of the actors as individuals and as a pairing/team.

This scene also caused me to dig deeper, with the help of some very knowledgeable mutuals, into what “persistent” and “cute” mean in a sexual context in Japan. My main post about that is below.

Noticing Hagiwara's use of Hira's "persistent voice" also helped me to notice something else when I checked out his other work, and that is that he often uses his voice in very different ways in different roles. I recently watched a drama he did before Utsukare and I was struck by this all over again. Again, it shows a really impressive degree of control.

And now, for our one non-Utsukare scene in the top 5:

"I'm trying to seduce you"

I also wrote a nomination blurb about this scene for the kiss bracket. (If you're seeing a pattern here, well, yeah, it's a pattern.) The original voting post here but I'll go ahead and quote it in its entirety since it's pretty short.

This kiss is ridiculously hot and is a culmination of so much that’s been simmering beneath the surface for the entire show up to that point. Togawa has been pining so hard for Nozue for so long that when Nozue gives him a glimmer of hope and then tries to leave, everything he’s been bottling up comes surging out. Kimura Tatsunari exudes a level of desperate lustfulness in this scene that’s as intense as anything I’ve seen in any genre. We’re all familiar with the idea that people look at a person’s mouth when they want to kiss them, but Togawa looks at Nozue’s mouth like he dreams about it every night and sees it every time he closes his eyes. No wonder he feels a need to stick his thumb in there. Takeda Kouhei also communicates so much in this scene. Nozue is shocked and confused but he can’t help but respond to Togawa’s kisses. You can see the gears turning—and refusing to turn—as he tries to make sense of what’s happening—and keeps kissing Togawa back even though he still can’t process it. Togawa’s declaration, “I’ve been trying to seduce you, with everything I have,” is the cherry on top.

There's another bit of subtle physical communication here that I find interesting, and I think you might too, @wen-kexing-apologist. Just recently I've been thinking about the meaning, in kissing scenes, of what for lack of a better term I'll call the head-bonk. By this I mean the thing where one person puts their forehead against the other person's, often with at least a tiny bit of an impact that renders it a bonk rather than, like, just touching them together. Togawa kisses Nozue once, then a second time, and then goes in for a third that Nozue avoids by sinking toward the floor. The third kiss doesn't happen, but when Togawa starts to initiate it he does an absolutely sublime head-bonk. I'm still figuring out what I think about the head-bonk thing. All I know is that, from my vantage point, that little move on Kimura's part practically screams "I've been holding this back for five goddamn years and I can't wait one more second to kiss this person."

Runners-up and honorable mentions:

Semantic Error:

Their first kiss in the restaurant after Jae Young calls Sang Woo "hyung" - I have watched this so much that if I had been asked for my top 6 this would have been #6.

Jae Young demonstrating the features of the "free trial"

Minato’s Laundromat (season 1, of course):

Shin freaking out about Minato being alone with Hanabusa

The washing machine kabedon

The “smelling the sheets” scene

Kiseki (I just watched this for the first time a week or so ago and I have already done so much scene-rewatching it's ridiculous):

That incredibly angsty sex scene with Ai Di and a drunk Chen Yi, you know the one

Chen Yi's confession to a physically restrained Ai Di

The scene at Ai Di's bar where Chen Yi puts him in a double kabedon

Ai Di and Chen Yi's conversation after Ai Di gets out of prison, where he says he fucked Chen Yi "just for fun" and offers to let him do stuff to him as "revenge"

Ai Di trying to scare Chen Yi by stroking his chest and asking him if he wants to "play" and then getting weirded out when Chen Yi asks, "What if I say yes?"

Jheruei and Zongyi's first real kiss and subsequent A+ lap-sitting moment

And as a bonus, here's my most-rewatched non-QL moment:

There's a scene I'm obsessed with in Something in the Rain where Jun Hui comes to Jin A's home and sees her ex-boyfriend there with her and her parents, lobbying to get back together and manhandling her, and he reacts exactly the way you'd expect as someone to who's in love with Jin A. It is tattooed on my brain. If I ever learn to make gifs I am gif'ing the fuck out of that scene.

#obsessive rewatching #utsukushii kare #utsukushii kare meta #old fashion cupcake #hagiwara riku #yagi yusei #kimura tatsunari #takeda kouhei #BL asks meme #semantic error #kiseki: dear to me #minato's laundromat #something in the rain

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wen-kexing-apologist · 1 year ago

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The Greatest Kisses of All Time

So @neuroticbookworm just finished watching Old Fashion Cupcake and @waitmyturtles is never not watching Bad Buddy, and this naturally sparked a conversation around two of the best kisses of all time. The kiss between Togawa and Nozue in Episode 4 of OFC and the kiss between Pat and Pran in Episode 5 of BBS.

For as much as there are similarities in these four characters, namely that Pat and Nozue both exist for years without any understanding of Pran and Togawa’s feelings, and that Pat and Nozue both exist for years without realizing their own queerness. I don’t know how many people who may be reading this were around for the BL-Bracket Best Kiss competition, but myself and quite a few others on here were fighting tooth and nail for the final fighting ring to be Bad Buddy vs. Old Fashion Cupcake because these are just…such emotionally complex, beautifully shot, and masterfully performed feats of acting and filmmaking. But their kisses could not feel more different. So I wanted to take a moment to break these scenes down.

Bad Buddy, Episode 5

There is already so much want and hope and pain in Pran’s eyes when he turns around to face Pat. When Pran says “we aren’t even friends” Pat’s response is this extremely small, ironic smile and an exhaling of breath. When he responds to Pran’s statement, his is listing off all of these barriers to the two of them being together, the tow of them being friends with each other. But the way his voice sounds, the way the music supports makes the words and the emotions so dichotomous. Pat is listing all these reasons that they should not be together, but Ohm delivers these lines like Pat is telling Pran all the reasons they should be. And part of that has to do with the subtle ways in which he undermines the impossibilities of their friendship with the realities of it. “How can we be friends if we live next door to each other but can’t even talk?” but they do talk. They have spent their whole lives talking.

And I think you can kind of tell the way this kiss is going to go at the end (with Pran walking away) with how much sadder Pran progressively gets as Pat continues to talk “[when you were away] I was so damn happy” and Pran looks crestfallen. And again we get a dichotomy here with Pat listing off all these positives of Pran being gone from his life, but the tone that is being set by the irony in Pat’s face and the sadness in Pran’s is building on this idea. Pat is listing all these reasons why being apart from Pran was good for him, but Ohm delivers these lines like Pat is telling him all the reasons why being apart is not an option. The way that realization and hope comes in to Pran’s eyes, in to his face when Pat says “It was so depressingly lonely for me”. Like, that line is fucking tragic, this moment is fucking tragic. Pat admitting how lonely he was is sad, and yet it is the thing that gives Pran hope that finally finally his feelings may be reciprocated.

This is the constant trend. Why should the lines “Do you want to be my friend?” “No.” be so heartwarming and hopeful, so honest and pure, and raw when at face value saying you don’t want to be someone’s friend would not be regarded as a positive thing. The moment of happiness when Pat pulls away from their first soft kiss knowing something is right, the way Pran’s jaw sets in determination when he grabs Pat and pulls him in for more. Their kiss builds and builds and builds in its intensity the longer it goes on, the more time neither of them pulls away, how hungry they both are for it the more it feels right, the more things settle in to place. The look of pure and utterly joyous relief on Pat’s face when they finally part, everything having clicked in to place for him. Finally understanding himself after all of these years, only to have Pran, who has known for so long what he wants, how he feels about Pat, sobbing and walking away because he cannot allow himself to believe this is real.

I think I said this in one of my Our Skyy 2 posts about PatPran that Pat is someone that is unable to ponder. It may take him his entire life up to this point to realize that he has feelings for Pran, but the second that he does, he does not linger on the thought, he does not mull it over, he does not find shame in it. He is upset at Pran because Pran sang their song, because that song is important, because Pran is important, because he wants to be with Pran, and then he immediately goes to tell Pran all of this, to admit his feelings, to kiss him, to want to be together. While Pran has been sitting on this love, this knowledge for years, pining and in pain at all the ways Pat has kept him close while being completely oblivious to both Pran’s feelings for him, and his feelings for Pran. And, I don’t know, maybe it is just that hindsight is 20/20, or that Bad Buddy is so deeply ingrained in me at this point that I may be overestimating my powers of prediction here. But Pran walking away from that kiss was not a surprise. Pat’s reaction to that kiss was not a surprise. You can see every part of where this kiss is going, you can see the pain in Pran’s eyes, you can see the desperation in Pat’s. You know what is going to happen the second they break apart.

But Nozue and Togawa? I am not certain that I can say the same

Old Fashion Cupcake, Episode 4

Honestly throughout most of Old Fashion Cupcake, we do not get anywhere near the level of sexual tension we get between Pat and Pran, though the few moments there are are fucking powerful. Leading up to the Episode 4 kiss, Togawa has convinced Nozue to try to plank, and boy oh boy is it a good excuse to get this hot man on his bed. I do appreciate the fact that there does not appear to be any sexual tension to begin with. Togawa getting on Nozue’s back may look sexually suggestive, but it does not (initially) feel sexually suggestive. And that is in part due to the fact that Nozue is currently distracted, he isn’t tuned in to the sexual tension. And it is a testament to Takeda’s acting prowess that in a split second Nozue is able to go from laughing at being tickled to laying the tension on thick. We move in to the conversation about the positive impact they have had on each other’s lives. A complete opposite of Pat and Pran. This is an admission on Togawa’s part about his feelings for Nozue, even if he does not say that directly.

It is why he starts the conversation with his back to Nozue, it’s why it takes him so long to make eye contact. And Togawa walks away, while Nozue smiles fondly to himself, reflecting on the importance of Togawa to his own life, and I honestly do not think it is until the second that Togawa comes rushing back towards him, saying his name low and with such intensity that it really starts to click for Nozue what is about to happen, what is happening. Over the past few episodes, Nozue has been turning over these thoughts and questions about why he feels so irritable and out of sync when he thinks Togawa has ignored his email. But I do not think it is until Ochi-san calls Togawa and snaps him out of this moment, that the embarrassment kicks in. We enter the continuous shot, Nozue says he has to leave, and he will not make eye contact with Togawa.

And it must be said, that while do not in any way shape or form doubt that Ohm and Nanon could have absolutely demolished a continuous shot for their Ep 5 kiss, I think we rely too heavily on their microexpressions for it to have worked. But here, it is such a brilliant choice, because everything that ends up unfolding is spontaneous, unexpected in some regard. The episode 4 kiss being a continuous shot serves to express and highlight the motion of the scene, the energy of the scene, which is what we need for the eruption that will occur, where we rely more on seeing the difference in the words and the emotions that are coming out of Pat in Ep 5 of BBS. I think that Nozue’s feelings, his realization, his anxiety comes on suddenly, so suddenly that the camera does not have time to cut away. Nozue is panicking, and he is trying to stay emotionally detached in a way that Pat and Pran are not, in a way that Pat and Pran are incapable of. Because Pat has been oblivious and Pran has been repressed, while Togawa has been repressed and Nozue has been oblivious, and Nozue, unlike Pat, is a character that is prone to decision paralysis. His habit of maintaining the status quo because making different choices means something bad might happen, means that he is much more likely to keep things the way they were. To ignore his feelings, or to run from them, unlike Pat who is physically incapable of holding those feelings in his body.

There is desperation between Togawa and Nozue, just as there is desperation between Pat and Pran, but the desperation for Pat and Pran comes from Pat needing Pran to understand his feelings, while the desperation for Togawa stems from trying to stop Nozue from running from his feelings, while Nozue’s desperation is to flee. I love love love that Nozue’s approach here. Where Pat was listing off all these impossibilities for their relationship, that were tragic yet true, and delivered with hope, Nozue is trying to shut down. He is being as polite as he can muster, but he is absolutely not concerned with seeming like he is lying. Again, where Pat is rambling off a list of things that were true but had not been said aloud in years, Nozue is rambling off a list of things that were not true and are only said because Nozue’s brain is disconnected from his body. The first thoughts that pop in to his head are the first things that come out of his mouth, any and every poor and pathetic excuse, and Togawa’s desperate attempts to counter every argument, to try to keep Nozue here. There is a tension underlying the scene that we get through the background music, that is far more discordant than the romantic, hopeful swells we got in Bad Buddy.

Togawa grabs Nozue, and kisses him, and the music cuts out so that it is just silence. Nozue’s mind goes blank, and where we get the intensity of Pat and Pran’s kiss escalating from both sides as their kiss goes on, what we get from Nozue is a physical reaction that his brain has not caught up with. Because at every turn, Nozue kisses Togawa back. But his eyes are wandering, he’s very much uncertain about what is happening. Not in a “do I like this? How does this feel?” kind of way, in my opinion, but in a “how did I get here? What is happening?” kind of way. And then he drops, and Togawa follows, and we get the “I’m seducing you” confession. And for a while Nozue is just frozen there on the ground, but the longer Togawa speaks, the more Nozue’s brain and body finally connect, and the more he seems to relax. He tries to engage Togawa in conversation, they have switched roles as Nozue tries to stop Togawa’s ramble.

And Togawa won’t let him. Pran walks away because he cannot allow himself to hope that Pat is actually serious about liking him, Togawa puts his hand to Nozue’s lips to make sure that he Nozue cannot reject him. Togawa’s internalized homophobia will not allow him to dream of a world where Nozue returns his feelings. So he hurts himself by rejecting Nozue before Nozue can reject him. Togawa asks to be hit, just sits there bowing and waiting to be beaten for being queer, for liking his boss, and you can see the way it hurt Nozue to see that Togawa assumes that Nozue would resort to violence like that. Nozue gets this look of disgust on his face, this look of pain when Togawa tells him he can hit him.

And where I knew where the PatPran kiss was heading, while it was no surprise that Pran walked away at the end of that, I cannot say I know what Nozue would have done if Togawa hadn’t jumped the gun. I don’t think Nozue knows what he would have done if Togawa had let the moment linger. If Togawa had let Nozue speak.

Anyway all of this to say that I love both of these scenes so much, and it is a testament to the acting prowess of all performers involved that so much can be conveyed. That Ohm and Nanon had to film all the rooftop scenes for the entire show in one evening, had to change the nature of Pat and Pran’s relationship as the Qs progressed. That Takeda and Kimura could carry four minutes of an intensely emotional scene where the power and the comfortability must flow between Togawa and Nozue, where Takeda has to stay physically in the scene while ensuring that his character looks and acts like he is in two different places. Pat’s hope, Pran’s despair, Nozue’s understand, and Togawa’s fear are all so visceral, it is no wonder these scenes have made and maintain such an impact.

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