#Kicking asses and taking names?
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localaceken · 9 months ago
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EVERYBODY SHUSH
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ENHANCE
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MY WIFE!!!!
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thesargasmicgoddess · 2 months ago
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Monday Mood...
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taikk0 · 2 years ago
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the unspoken broflovski family curse
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ratatatastic · 4 months ago
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the things ekky has done or said that i cant stop thinking about. the 4 minute cut.
#theres a lot more#but those videos exist in vertical and like wow yeah#obviously because of that honourable mentions:#ekky on the pole almost kicking luosty in the face falling on his ass while he gets hauled up by multiple cats and mikksy put his hat back#ekky calling forsy a perfect swede#ekky slowdancing with sasha at the club#ekky saying im below you to benny while pointing out his name#ekky showing off his tat every minute he can by pulling up his shorts at the parade and gave us an egregious look at his dick#the first time ekky and mikksy do the bumpy ritual and ekky grunts at each bump and goes I LIKE THAT#any practise day mini mic shenanigans i.e “forsy cuz i love him” “forsy but only with his shirt off”#when he went tarps off for his cupday because it was raining on the golfcourse#additionally when he shimmied the cup to feeling hot hot hot#that time he was wearing shorts that they were bunching up in the front and he had to “subtly” pick it out in front of a crowd of phins fans#that time he organised a sturgeon tagging trip and invited the boys who liked fishing and also monty for vibes#because fishing is his love language#oh letting maffhew pour champagne in his mouth at the club#feeling up stolie at the end of the parade and lifting up his shirt#drinking out of the cup with forsy and also feeding himself the champgane cam but forsy taking it away from him#him hugging senko into his stall#honestly anytime he brings up forsy whether its his footspeed/speed. his body.#or how blessed he is to play with him#and likening him to a greek god#please dont make me go on
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ghostbsuter · 1 year ago
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The house of Nightingale & Constantine ( P. 2 )
> previous part , > next part
.・゜-: ✧ :-
"Okay, who the heck is that?"
Danny storms out of the elevator, positively pissed at the appearance of another old house in his territory.
"Frederich Isak Showenhower, aka Freakshow, current heir of a long line of thiefs." John lets out a suffering groan, not even daring to take out a cigarette under Alfred's sharp gaze.
"Shoot, freakshow?"
"You know him?"
"Ancients, he mind controlled me at some point."
(He isn't gonna knowledge the narrowed eyes of the bat. Nu-uh.)
Constantine whistles at that, giving a wince. "Yeah, we all had go through that at one point."
"Didn't know he was a descendant of an old house, but I don't recognise the name Showenhower?"
John clicks his tongue, shrugging. "They branched out from the original house of Chatterton." He points at the screen, showing their current annoyance for all to see.
"What strange is, is that the house of Chatterton had many names in its line, so why is Showenhower of all the current heir? I'm calling tomfoolery."
"Oh no, I'm fully agreeing."
"Care to share with the class?" Jason, Red hood, asks, eyebrow raised and leaning against the table.
"Houses of the dark, old ones at that, are powerful." Danny explains. "The original house is always the most powerful, each branch can, depending of how far the connection is to the original, be very weak or very strong."
"But this here?" John gestures to the screen. "This smells like betrayal."
"The house of Chatterton was one of the youngest of oldest houses, new compared to the Nightingales and Constantines." The younger took over again, frowning.
"And yet Showenhower is the heir, which shouldn't happen since the family is rather estranged from the original. It should've only happen when no other house, those closer, are unable to take the title."
"It means they disappeared, and one cannot simply disappear once connected to a house of dark." The Hellblazer looks grim, eyening the golden pocket watch.
"Midnight soon," he glances at the Nightingale. "Should we?"
"Where are you going?" Bruce steps forward, cowl laying like a hood behind him.
Danny peers up at the man, apologetic. "B? Can you let me and Connie handle this?"
The man is looking at Constantine with sharp eye, conveying his message and intent clearly.
("Let him get hurt and we will hunt you down.")
"Alright, chum. Be careful."
He receives a bright smile, making it almost, only almost, worth it.
"Alright, chum. Be careful."
He receives a bright smile, making it almost, only almost, worth it.
Nightingale looks at Constantine.
These are no normal circumstances.
"The house of Nightingale offers a temporary truce until the suspected betrayal of a house of dark is fully investigated."
"The house of Constantine accepts the temporary truce offer and gladly accepts the request of help for the betrayal of a house of dark."
They shook hands, whispering "so mote it be." to legalise the spell and then are off to go.
Danny waves at his family as John teleports them both away.
"I'm betting 50 bucks that Constantine fails in protecting danny."
"I bet 60 for danny finishing the job!"
"70 for–"
(Bets were made, and all parties waited for the true end.)
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poorly-drawn-mdzs · 2 years ago
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Whatever Man and Whatever Sword
[First] Prev <–-> Next
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glitchedcosmos · 1 year ago
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Sonadow aside I also REALLY REALLY loved them the whole time
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hijinxinprogress · 5 months ago
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Coffee addict Never sleeps Tim drake ❌ 
Solving cases in his sleep off 87 energy drinks Tim Drake ✅
The coffee addict never sleeps perpetually tired Tim Drake thing is a widely accepted headcanon however that was elementary school tim but after he stayed up for a week straight subsisting entirely on coffee to decipher the bat weekly patrol schedule and how it aligns with rogue attacks/Arkham breakouts, he crashed then when he woke up it was fucking wednesday so he missed his chance to commemorate his discovery with pictures of Robin and he decided that shit would never happen again and made himself an ‘efficient’ sleep schedule so he could run around doing fuck shit, add to his robin shrine, and stay on honor roll bc he was even more pissed to see the gotham gazette had pictures of Robin with an on site interview credited to Vicki Vale (listen bowl cut tim had a one sided beef with vicki vale that included tim judging who gets better pics of the bats but she isn’t even aware that she’s competing with a whole ass child 😭 he’s sitting at the table with a mug of orange juice and looks at the newspaper snorts and goes ‘fucking amateur I could do better’) 
Regularly unsupervised tiny businessman in training Tim ‘Ten hours of uninterrupted sleep?? That’s so inefficient not to mention fucking stupid’ Drake is so pissed he missed getting shots of Robin dropkicking a rogue from 6 six stories up (for absolutely no reason dick just thinks it’s fun) that he just takes at least 3 hour naps every eight hours 😭 he refuses to spend almost half a day sleeping ‘for no reason when he could be doing something productive’ 
And he still does this as a bat but it’s just easier to tell if he didn’t take his nap bc he has less than zero impulse control and he’s just fucking done with everything like the gcpd is terrified bc tim’s saying shit like ‘This guys a fucking moron, I could’ve done this in half the time without killing anyone fucking loser doesn’t he know if you keep them alive you can prolong the torture?’ and ‘you’re like all hysterical and for what 🤨 ‘you blew up 83% of Bristol waah’ stfu and fucking rebuild it?? It’s only rich mfs that live there, it’s just a matter of them opening their fucking wallets’ once a new recruit made the mistake of asking if robin had adult supervision regularly and Tim responded with ‘well if you’re gonna snitch to cps like a little bitch then yeah’ and that cop did snitch so tim fucking doxxed him
Yj has just accepted that sometimes they will find tim in an air vent, on the roof, in one of their closets, or something just fucking knocked out then an alarm will go off and he’ll just get up like nothing happened but for the first couple of months they were probably concerned bc ‘I’ve never seen you sleep?? wtf are you on man’ and Tim’s confused bc ‘I slept next to you this morning wdym??’ and that’s how yj discovers tim sleeps with his eyes open
But one of the worst things about Tim’s ‘time efficient sleep schedule’ nonsense is that it fucking works he’s one of the most well rested and coherent bats even after back to back Arkham breakouts however the absolute worst thing about his sleep schedule is the likelihood of going into the cave and seeing tim staring in a daze but wide eyed yet somehow never blinking at the batcomputer with 57 tabs open on top of being unresponsive and thinking he has a fucking concussion or he’s been replaced but he’s just doing case work while muttering nonsense in his fucking sleep for some reason
#Tim drake being unhinged even in his sleep and taking sleepwalking to the next level by doing reports/solving cases in his sleep#A bat hearing incoherent mumbling but no one’s nearby: 😐 he’s in the walls 😨 he’s in the goddamn walls#No one knows how or why he’s in that particular spot in the wall bc there’s isn’t a secret entrance/crawl space there#Tim also has a wall of energy drinks Bruce regularly tries to lecture him aboot#And Tim’s like ‘your eldest son has snorted sugar MULTIPLE times’#then he gestures at Jason ‘and that one looks like if he didn’t have drug related childhood trauma he’d try to snort protein powder’#bruce: tim we have to talk about your behavior#Tim: like three of your kids have basked in the blood of their enemies 🤨 I am NOT your biggest issue rn#Dick Grayson being the main reason there’s an ‘acceptable levels of force’ slide with 600+ slides & most are examples of what not to do#Stephanie 🤝🏾 Damian: being reason Bruce is adding more slides to a PowerPoint from 2 decades ago#Tim drakes idea of straight forward is how everyone else imagines jumping through hoops and fucking struggling to avoid pissing off the fae#Like wdym simple?? This plan has 97 parts and he’s like no that’s just the first page of plan 1 if it’s sunny#Rogues: I can’t catch him off guard wtf do none of these mfs sleep??#Tim ‘never let em know your next move’ Drake who’s been sleep for the past 45 minutes: 🔵➖🔵#Yj has cuddle piles in the air vents#Everyone with enhanced senses is losing bc ‘there are children in the walls’#Coffee addict babs calls tim weak when he tells her he cut coffee bc it was fucking with him before continuing to chug hot coffee#Oracle: this is the worst Tuesday ever 😔 I need more coffee before I deal with an Arkham breakout#Nightwing: but it’s sunday??#Spoiler: Maybe it’s time we switch to decaf love also just out of curiosity when was the last time you slept??#Oracle: you want the fucking location or not?#Dick: I take it back mb#Spoiler: a thousand apologies to our gracious overlord#Oracle: that’s what I thought#Bruce: you’re benched oracle#Oracle: take that bench and shove it up your ass batman#Steph 100% calls everyone mushy pet names and has since Bruce lectured her about professionalism when she was dating tim#Imagine getting your ass kicked by a sleepingwalking middle schooler#Or worse: imagine having to explain to your insurance company that a sleepwalking child blew up your home#tim drake is a menace
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muckyschmuck · 5 months ago
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AAAAAAAAA
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sbd-laytall · 10 months ago
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Warrior Nun | 2.04 | "1 Corinthians 10:20-21"
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charlunday · 1 month ago
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i really hate when people think katniss didn’t love peeta, like what???? there was a whole paragraph in this book where she was talking about his EYELASHES??? Like huh
What's even more confusing to me is how people dismiss the importance of the love story in the books. They believe that anything to do with romance is some juvenile marketing ploy, and that they are so high and mighty for recognizing it. When in reality, what do we have to fight for if not love? And not even necessarily romantic love, either. The spark of the entire series is Katniss' love for Prim. To think the Hunger Games is about fury and rebellion is to miss the point entirely. Fury and rebellion leads to a society like D13. In order to create a world that is good for people, you must love people.
Love is what we live for, love is what we die for, and the entire series is just proving that over and over.
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deancasforcutie · 10 months ago
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everyone: *talking about how Cas' confession demands to be addressed in any Supernatural followup* *still phrasing it like it's an obstacle or accident they didn't think through and not the emotional climax the whole season was building to and the whole text supports, like the trap it laid on the network to demand acknowledgment in this way somehow wasn't always the plan*
Bobo "emotionally invested" *queering-the-text-to-defy-and-expose-censorship-constraints* *wrote-the-confession-to-expose-how-it-was-already-queer-and-pull-fandom's-pants-down-on-heteronormative-bias* Berens:
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xxplastic-cubexx · 5 days ago
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obsessed with how the literal second charles first dies in the classic comics magneto finally comes back for the first time in like twenty issues
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darling-heffron · 25 days ago
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Sorry all my wifi had been acting up and then I got busy doing other things, then poof, Saturday came and went! So sorry this is late but I hope the chapter makes up for it. Also I got my nails done and didn't think of the implications to my typing lmao! ✨
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Taglist: @mellow-human , @malarkgirlypop , @next-autopsy
Chapter Seven: And then there were Two
Sam’s POV: 
Walking was the easy part of Sam’s journey, the hard part was avoiding everyone else. Especially the humans, she didn’t need to meet anymore people like the family she had only buried days ago. 
There could be no guilt clouding her thoughts during these times, she needed to be focussed not sentimental. The last thing she needed was a friend. 
Her army comrades often called Sam the lone wolf of the pack, often adjacent from the other troops who were bonding and making lasting friendships. Sam enjoyed her solitude and didn’t have the patience for stupid people, she had other activities that filled her boredom. 
Fighting mainly, as it was a good way to release her stress. She often found that after having a rough day, letting out her pent up emotions on the punching bag felt good. Sam never felt the need to vent to her “friends”, her fists did all the talking she needed.  
If she didn’t feel like fighting, books had the same effect as talking to people. Except she didn’t have to say anything back to them. She didn’t enjoy fictional novels about romance and friendship and adventure. The blonde preferred the cold hard facts of history, she would learn from everyone else's mistakes and not make them herself. 
Unfortunately sometimes Sam would have to deal with people during her job. On her tours in Afghanistan she was paired with the most annoying girl in the squad. 
A lucky dip that was not so lucky. 
Her partner drove her mad almost every single day, trying to befriend the tall woman. Sam was not having it, she didn’t need nor want a friend. The soldier was a petite brunette that was only a couple of years younger, but for some reason she was always so happy. Always a pep to her step and a song in her heart, the girl was joyful on crack. 
Even in her demise she still somehow had a smile on her face and was optimistic about her doomed fate. 
The girl, Abby, had died only days before they were set to depart back home. She had offered to do the final sweep of the night for Sam, which she had been scheduled to complete. On her route back she had misstepped, accidentally setting off an IED that in turn took her life not hours later. 
Lying on the street with her limbs scattered about, she bled out slowly and painfully. But still the young girl managed to smile and laugh, making a joke. Abby had laid in Sam’s lap as she lost her blood and quickly turned cold. The last thing she had said was, “I’m glad it was me and not you.” 
Abby had died later that night in hospital from her wounds. Her death still haunted the angry blonde. 
Her depressing thoughts were interrupted by boisterous noise. Sam looked up with disgust etched into her face. These were the stupid fuckers she was talking about. 
Even from a distance she could see their unkempt oily hair and dirty clothes. They smiled at each other while they joked, some misogynistic comment falling from the shorter ones mouth as the other two chortled together. 
“Ugh, gross.” She muttered out loud. Sam didn’t enjoy people, but men were her least favourite. It may have been her army upbringing but all the men she knew were cunts, especially her father who seemed to be the worst one of all. 
The only reason there were other people here was because she had made it to Albany. Walking all day for two days she had made good time from Pittsfield. But even though the city offered food and other resources, it attracted everything else along with it. Just like the group of men who stood only 50 feet away, laughing amongst themselves. 
Somehow luck didn’t seem to be in favour of the young woman; she accidentally kicked an empty can across the street as she tried to evade the group. 
“Fuck me.” Sam cursed under her breath. She watched the men swivel their heads around to investigate the noise. Sam ducked quickly trying to hide behind the abandoned car she was standing near but she knew she had been spotted. 
“Hey pretty lady!” One of the men cooed. Sam rolled her eyes so hard she was concerned they were going to get stuck in the back of her head. 
“We see you blondie, come out!” The other greasy man joined in. 
Sam silently screamed in her head, she was not in the mood for people. Drawing in a deep breath she stood. She cracked her neck as she walked out from behind the vehicle. 
The men started to walk briskly towards her. Her fingers flexed at her side, itching to latch around the weapon on her hip. But she stood still, a relaxed posture and bitchy face, well her normal face but still, she looked menacing. 
“Quite a scowl you got blondie.” The tallest man of the group smirked at her. 
Her face didn’t change even with the comment. Sam didn’t speak, she didn’t want to seem like she was trying to make excuses. Plus men dug themselves into deeper holes in silence than in conversation. She would bait them. 
“Not much of a talker.” The short thinning haired man stepped closer, even though he was still a good foot away she could smell him from here. 
“Yeah but she is a looker, hey Jeremy.” The snivelly looking man egged on the tall one, Jeremy, elbowing him in the side.  
“You sure are pretty.” Jeremy licked his lips. Sam’s disgust was audible at the action. 
The young woman flicked her eyes around the group. They didn’t seem to be all that well equipped, noting the baseball bat the short chubby man held, and the grimey machete on the rodent looking man’s belt. Jeremy seemed to be the only one with a gun, tucked into the front of his waistband. Sam scoffed that was only good for one thing, getting his dick shot off.   
“I think she’s scared of us.” Weasel man continued. He looked like the fucking jester of the group, though he didn’t seem all that funny. 
“You don’t have to be afraid, we’re really nice.” The chubby man had the audacity to reach out to try and touch Sam’s arm. 
Her reflexes were faster. Sam’s hand shot out from her side and gripped the man’s limb like a vice. 
That set the group on edge, the other two sprung back, hands clasping around their own weapons. 
“I’m not afraid of you horrible fuck-eyed wank cloths.” Sam growled, squeezing the man's hand even harder. He let out a whimper of pain and tried to wiggle free, but Sam’s hold didn’t budge. 
“Leave me the fuck alone, before I rip of every single one of your ballsacks off and feed it to the rabid motherfuckers while you watch.” The man guffawed at her statement, her words were clearly not enough for the men, she would have to show them. 
“Oh you need proof. Well baldly, how many fingers you want broken?” Sam sneered at the man, his face bright red with rage and pain. 
“Now you’re quiet?” Sam wrenched the thinned haired man’s finger backwards extending them towards his back. “That means I get to choose.” She whispered before completely twisting the chubby man’s hand completely backwards until there was a satisfying crunch. 
Baldy howled in pain as he clutched at his now broken wrist. It hung limply from the joint, the men who had watched the whole interaction, now began to rile up. 
“What the fuck is your problem blondie?” Jesterville Jones piped up, his buck teeth exposed as he hopped around like the rabbit he was.     
“I chose wrist.” Sam shrugged, seemed like he wasn’t paying attention, or was an idiot. Most likely an idiot. 
“We didn’t do anything to you.” Jeremy whined as if his mum had just taken away his PS5 privileges. 
“You approached me, that was your first mistake. Then you called me blondie, you half chewed pencil looking fuck. And this literal easy bake oven tried to touch me. So if I counted correctly, which he can’t.” Sam pointed to weasel face. “That would make three things you did to me.” 
“Now do you all want limp wrists, you slimy turd canoes?” Sam threatened the gaggle of fucking morons. “Or would you like to leave with the little dignity you have still intact?” 
As soon as she finished her sentence the men fled. Tails between their legs like the small chihuahuas they were.  
Mars POV: 
Getting to Albany was simple. Marleen packed up and left as the sun was rising, unwilling to be near that house any longer. She followed along the highway, using road signs as her guide. 
The houses began getting closer together until she found herself at the city's edge. The closer she got the more her nerves started to scramble. Mars spotted several small groups and lone rabids and did everything she could to avoid them, turning a three hour journey into five. 
Marleen had never been to Albany before, but she could imagine what it was like; the roads bustling with vehicles, people everywhere, everything teaming with life. 
And now, it was barren. Abandoned. 
If she had to guess she would say there were live humans in this vast city somewhere but nowhere that she could see. 
That could be a good thing though. At least that’s what Denver always said. And just like that she was tearing up once again- how many tears did she have left? Surely her eyes would run dry at some point? 
Shaking her head, Mars headed into the eerie ghost town. 
She didn’t get very far before noticing undead stumbling in her direction. Shit. There were too many for her to stay and fight, she had no choice but to flee. They hadn’t seen her yet, giving her the advantage of stealth. 
As quietly as she could, Mars turned and treaded down a side street, off the main road and out of the zombies' sight. 
This repeated a few times; Marleen would come across a number of rabids and sneak away unseen onto a new path, slowly making her way through the maze of a city. 
Her luck was seemingly up. Avoiding certain death had never been easier for the young blonde.  
Until it wasn’t.
Mars rounded a corner, making her way down a narrow road- a glorified alleyway. And she did so without checking to see if the way was clear, her first mistake. 
Her second mistake was immediately dropping her only weapon the instant she bumped into something. 
Marleen had walked straight into a solid body and squealed. It took her a moment to realise that whatever she had walked into could be a human; like her or an undead and she had yet to find out which.
Her yelp was mixed with a low voice, arms wrapped around her body and held her close, it felt all too familiar. Mars cried out and struggled against the unknown person until she heard a distinct voice- the undead can't speak.  
Her head flicked upwards, revealing her captor as a living. In fact, there were three living men standing in front of her. 
All caution was thrown to the wind, she hadn’t seen real people since she and Denver had been separated two nights prior, and she found she was missing the social interaction. Being able to talk to someone who was capable of talking back, who didn’t have blood covering every inch of them- that was priceless to Mars. 
“Hey, shhh, It's okay.” The man holding on to her spoke, his grasp on her had stabilised the both of them, keeping the pair upright. Now that they were in no danger of falling, he released his grip on her and held up his hands in mock surrender.
From where she stood, she had a second to give them a once over and take in their appearances. They looked like they’d been through hell. Dirty and greasy and covered in filth. 
Something that stuck out to her was the shortest one favoured his left hand, like it was hurt. She would bring that up at some point, make sure chubby hadn't been bitten by a rabid.
She had two voices telling her two very different things right now and wasn’t sure what to do. 
One said: Absolutely do not trust these guys, turn and leave right now, you don’t know these strangers.
While the other said: Maybe they could help you? It’s tough being out here all alone, having friends is never a bad thing. Talk to them, ask if they can help you get to Illinois. 
“Uh-Hello?” Was the greeting she settled on, this seemed to please them as all three grinned at her. It should have been a good sign, the smiles; but for some reason it unnerved her. 
“Hello beautiful.” The tallest man, her ‘saviour’ spoke out, “you out here all alone?” Mars nodded slowly, still not totally convinced she could trust these guys. 
“Well what would a pretty girl like you be doing out here all by herself?” One of the others spoke up, he had buck teeth that resembled a mouse or a rat. All three men still smiled at her waiting for her answer. 
“I-I’m trying to get to Illinois.”
“Illinois, eh?” The rat man echoed the words as he stepped closer to her, “We can help ya get to Illinois.” 
“You can?” Mars felt a smile creep onto her face. She held hope that these men would be kind and helpful, regardless of their appearance. Don't judge a book by its cover and all that.
“Sure.” The tallest, who seemed to be their leader, smirked. 
“Yeah, we can help you.” Rat-man laughed as he nudged his friend's arm with his elbow, like they were sharing a joke- one that Mars was not privy to. 
It was then that Mars noticed the machete in the rat's grip, that paired with her dropped knife gave her chills- goosebumps rippled over her body. 
“You just have to do a little something for us first….” His voice gave Mars the heebie jeebies and she began to rethink her openness to the trio- maybe she should have been more skeptical of the strangers. 
“Scratch our backs, we scratch yours, blondie.” Rat-man reached out his hand and stroked Marleen’s cheek, her body instinctively flinched back, trying to get out of his reach.
“Really?” A louder voice sounded from behind the group of men. The trio seemed to recognise the person who had spoken, stilling in their actions and slowly turning. 
Between the gap of the men, Mars could see a tall, lean woman with a menacing stance. Her glare made the men shiver and Marleen found that she too was intimidated by this lady. 
Sam’s POV: 
Sam had tried her best to avoid the group after they had retreated. She continued on her search for food and water, but unfortunately before rounding a corner she had heard the slimy idiots talking amongst themselves. 
However what piqued her interest was a soft feminine voice that spoke back. Sam had stepped into the alley just as weasel face had said, “Scratch our backs, we scratch yours, blondie.” 
That pissed off the tall woman. For one, they had gone from one woman to the next, and secondly they didn’t even have the creativity to think of any better lines. 
“Wow! I thought you guys were fucking stupid, but this just really proves my point!” Sam gave her best cheerful sarcastic tone. 
“You seriously can’t think of any better material than Blondie?” She peered over their shoulders, finding a young petite woman backed into a corner by the group. The woman’s face said it all, please help me.  
A sigh left Sam’s lips, she was not in the mood for playing hero, but also the young girl, not even woman, looked so helpless it felt like a crime to leave. 
She cast her glare towards michelin man, who cowered under her hateful stare. He didn’t give her a second glance before darting off and ditching his so-called friends. 
“Dylan what the fuck dude!” Jeremy called out after fatso. Damn she had never seen someone of that girth run so fast. 
“Roly-poly has the right idea. Why don’t the rest of you scram and leave Bambi alone.” Sam looked over to the young lady, aptly named for her big doe eyes and deer in the headlights stare. 
“We aren’t scared of you, blondie.” Jeremy snarled. 
“Which one are you talking to, cause remember we are both ‘Blondie’ according to you.” Sam pointed out that the one name that had given each of the girls now didn’t work in the situation. 
“I’m talking to you-” He paused for a moment, pointing in her direction. “Angry blondie.” 
“Look at you using adjectives. Kind of embarrassing it took you that long to think of one, and angry at that.” Sam grimaced at the fucking idiot sandwich stood before her. 
“Can we be done now, I’m so fucking bored of this conversation?” Sam glanced down at her watch, she literally had better things to be doing than standing here wasting her breath on these white-trash shart hounds. 
“Well- uh- you.” The weasel man stuttered over his words. 
“You-uh-uh-um.” Sam mocked them. “Spit it out, speech impediment.”
“Right, that's it!” Inflatable balloon man bellowed in the least intimidating voice he could manage. In a quick motion he whipped out his gun from the front of his pants. Sam shied away worried he was going to whip out something else at the same time. 
“I don’t need to see all that.” Sam gestured to the man’s crotch. The young woman during the chaos, had bent down and grabbed the knife that had laid on the floor just in front of her. Sam watched her stand again, clutching the weapon to her chest. 
Jeremy surged forward with his gun, he flailed it around, it seemed as if he was unsure if he wanted to shoot Sam or hit her with it. It didn’t matter, the tall woman had disarmed him in seconds. 
Now she had the man by his neck and his gun in her grasp. Jeremy was pinned to her chest as he stared out at his mate who looked shocked but was still fixed in his position, not helping his buddy. 
Sam pressed the barrel of the man’s gun to his temple. Everyone froze, collectively holding their breaths. Weasel man’s face had drained of blood and he looked sickly pale. Bambi continued to wear her brown doe eyed stare, her mouth hanging slightly agape, Sam was unsure if this was due to shock or awe. 
“Alright lady!” Rodent man held out his hands showing his surrender. “We’ll leave you alone, just let us go!” The man pleaded. 
“Yeah just let us leave.” Jeremy sobbed like a young child who had lost their mummy in the supermarket. 
Sam brought the butt of the gun down hard into the side of Jeremy’s head, the man yelped out in pain as she pushed him away from her and he stumbled to the floor. Rodent man collected his friend from the floor, and urged him to leave. 
“My gun.” Jeremy held out his hand for his weapon. 
“It’s mine now. Fuck off.” Sam dismissed the command. She watched in amusement as the pair fled together, moving so fast they were falling over each other in panic. 
Turning on her heel she walked the way she had come from back out onto the street. 
Mars POV:
“Wait!” Marleen called out to her retreating saviour, “where are you going?” Her feet began following the mysterious woman- who completely ignored her. Her pace quickened, only slowing when she came side by side with the fiery lady. 
“Hey! I asked where you’re going.” Her statement came out whiny and she reached for the other woman's forearm. The moment her fingertips touched their target, the stranger sprung into action. She halted her steps and raised a closed fist so quickly that Mars barely had time to register what was happening.
“Woah-wait wait wait- it’s me! It’s me!” The shorter woman released her grip and raised her hands to cover her face, dropping her knife yet again. 
It clattered to the floor as both women watched.
“Who?”
“Me, it’s me?” Mars peered up at the taller blonde, her voice squeaked out from her defensive position, “From just now… you know, with those guys- Bambi! I’m Bambi…remember?” 
Recognition crosses over her face, “Oh. Right.” The woman lowered her fist, “You dropped your knife.” Her parting words as she turned swiftly and continued in the same direction. 
Mars huffed, bending over to pick up the weapon and then straightening to run after the other blonde. 
“You didn't answer my question.” Her words were spoken in between breaths, “Where are we going?” 
That seemed to gain the attention of her ruthless heroine, making her freeze in place once more. 
“We?” Her eyebrows raised in surprise, “WE aren’t going anywhere.” She gestured between the two of them with her finger. 
“But,” Marleen’s face scrunched in confusion, her bottom lip stuck out in a pout, “You just saved me?” 
“And?” 
Mars had no reply. It seemed logical to her that they buddy up, everyone needs friends and Mars could surely use someone as capable as her. 
The lean girl, hearing no reply from the smaller party continued on her journey. Once again, leaving ‘Bambi’ behind. 
And just like before, Mars chased after her, this time calling out “Can’t I come with you? I’ll be so quiet you won’t even know I’m there!” 
“No, I don’t pick up stragglers.” The woman’s husky voice sounded as she kept walking away from the young girl. 
“So why did you save me? Why not just let me die?” Marleen argued, genuinely curious. 
“I-”
“So you clearly have a conscience, or else you would’ve watched me be attacked by those men.” She spoke her thoughts aloud as they popped into her head, no filter and not even waiting to hear her responses. 
“Look-”
“Or you just didn’t want to watch it, so now you’re just leaving me to die when you don’t have to see.” 
“Jesus-”
“Cause leaving me now is like second hand murder. You know I’m not going to get very far by myself, but you’re still leaving.”
“Alright, alright! Fine! Christ, you made your point, I got it!” The lady finally got her words in before the young girl interrupted her once again. The taller of the two swung around to gesture for the persistent girl to cease her incessant yapping, “I will walk you to the next town over and then as soon, and I mean as soon as I find another group or person to take you, you are not my problem anymore. Understand?”
Mars let a cheesy smile break onto her face as she literally jumped for joy. “Deal!” Extending her pinky finger out to seal the promise the taller woman had just made. 
“I’m not making a pinky promise.” The lady shook her head, crossing her arms over her chest. 
Still Mars held out her hand, smiling widely, tipping her head to encourage the standoffish girl to accept her outstretched pinky. 
“No! I’m not.” The girl doubled down. But Mars ever so vigorously stood her ground, until the other blonde sighed and finally did as Marleen had asked. She reached out her hand quickly interlinking her pinky finger with the younger girl. The tall blonde snatched her hand away after sealing their deal. 
“Oh my God, are you normally this fucking infuriating?” 
“It depends who you ask.” Said with a shrug of her shoulders and a smirk on her face. “I’m Marleen, by the way.” 
“I didn’t ask.”
“You can call me Mars though.” Her cheery voice continued, “Sooo- what’s your name?” She was met with silence. “Okay, fine. Stay mysterious. I’ll just call yooou- Jessica?”
“No.” Her saviour deadpanned. 
“Okay, not Jessica…. Georgia?” Hope seeped into her words as she gently elbowed her taller companion in an attempt to gain her favour. 
“Please stop.” 
“You could just tell me your name? I’d stop if I knew what to call you- maybe Lauren?” 
Realising she wouldn’t shut her mouth until she got what she wanted, the calmer of the pair offered a solution, “If I tell you my name, will you be quiet?” 
“Yes.” Her reply was instantaneous and full of excitement. 
“It’s Sam.” She sighed out exasperatedly. 
“Sam!” Mars grinned, barely one second of silence passed before she was speaking once again, “Sam Sam Sam… is that short for Samantha?” 
“Shut. Up!” 
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AHHHHHHHHHH our girls finally met oml oml, so excited for this duo you have no idea! But ah, Sam doesn't seem all the keen on it ahaha sorry girl you got lumped with a whole ball of sunshine. Let me know if you also love these girlies together as much as I do.
Esra ✨
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borgialucrezia · 19 days ago
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it still sends me that cesare not only got to wear juan's armor and take command of his army without getting clocked for purposely trying to dishonorably sabotage it to humiliate him, but was also forgiven for killing him and then inheriting his father's legacy, secured the support of the french army and held the titles of duke of valentinois and the gonfaloniere of the papal army...the type of greed they talked about in the bible etc
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femmeetart · 10 months ago
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on their way to bother Fury
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