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pelova4president · 9 months ago

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Shadows are to protect I

Alessia Russo x Putellas!Reader

shadows are to protect II, III, IV

summary~ You just moved to Arsenal and everything was unknown to you but now you had Alessia. Your situationship with Alessia was everything but perfect but at least she was there, sometimes.

this is pure angst

Alessia is your whole heart. You could tell her that a thousand times and she still wouldn’t leave her boyfriend.

He doesn’t even get her, not like you do. He doesn’t appreciate her like you do. It should be you holding her hand on the streets. It should be you kissing her in the bars of London.

You didn’t really know when you started to feel that way. You’d just moved to England, a very scary move from your comfortable and warm Spain. Spain and Barcelona was all you’ve even known. Expending your world was just as terrifying as you’d ever believed.

The welcome was cold, very cold. It was the completely opposite of what you were used to, it was quite literally what you were petrified of. You left the warm sun kissing the dark little freckles on your face and exchanged the English rain dropping down on your hair. You weren’t even sure what to call it, not in English and not in Spanish either.

But even now you weren’t sure if you’d go back and stay in Barcelona. The sun might shine there most hours of the working days but you’d always be in the shadows. In the shadows of La Reina, Alexia Putellas, your sister.

The two coloured club had offered you a contract extension where you’d get paid twice the amount you did last year. You’d driven to the club like you did most days but this time you had one thing in mind, or so you thought. Signing for another three years and being the average defender in the team for whenever one of the original starters couldn’t participate.

A red and blue pen rested between your thumb and point fingers as you listened to your manager talk about the future. But most of it fell to deaf ears. “Alexia and you would be the head of the Champions League campaign. Imagine this, the Putellas hermanas on top of Europe.” he said full excitement. It wasn’t the whole campaign that set you off but how he began his sentence, ‘Alexia and you’.

You were sitting here, ready to sign your contract, for your future. They wanted you to sign and still their first thought was Alexia.

Without saying a word you stormed off. You were not doing this again for three more years.

You had spiked interest from multiple clubs, not only Europe but America too. But when Arsenal let your agency know that they wanted you, you knew that that was it. From now on you’ll be a gunner, through and through.

You got picked up from the Airport. With a sign reading ‘Putellas’. It felt good. They didn’t have to clarify which Putellas sister they were picking up, there was only one in London now, you. The bigger man, he might’ve even be twice the height of you introduced himself. And with the little English you had in store you thanked him and told him your name.

The man you now knew as Keith was a simple man. He opened the door for you and didn’t say much. You liked it that way, the silence was fine by you. You liked that the intimidating car you were sat in had tinted windows. Not so you couldn’t be seen but because it gave you some sort of comfort. When you were younger and Alexia was a rising star she had you sit in the backseat, where nobody could see you and where you’d be safe she’d say.

The little droplets of rain were doing races and you had lost for about the twentieth time when the car came to a stop. Keith grumbled something about being there and got out. You didn’t really know what to do and what they expected of you so you opened the car door. Picking your bags up you placed your right foot outside and your left followed.

It all went too fast, Jonas showed almost all the rooms in the building and the wet pitches that were not in any state to be used. You had to film a few shots for your signing announcement, get through a few medical test and finally got to go home.

Keith drove you to your temporary apartment just a few minutes away from the training ground. You had a streak of almost one hundred days of English on Duolingo so you thanked the tall man in the few words you had learned to say and got out of the black Range Rover.

You were home. You were home, you kept repeating those words but you didn’t believe it. You were home.

This is it now. North London is your new home.

The appartement was empty except for the blank furniture, it had no personality and it was hard to think there ever would be. Four white walls, a grey couch, a black kitchen and an all white bed in the middle of your bedroom. They didn’t even tell you that the kitchen would be just as empty as the apartment.

The sound of a notification alarmed you out of your emotionless state. You forgot to put your phone on do not disturb. ‘Where are you?’ it read. Alexia knew you didn’t sign for Barca the day before but she didn’t know you’d be gone by the morning. Tapping on the do not disturb mode you traveled to your all white bed.

And that is how it went, do not disturb mode on. You we there, at the training ground and the games but not really there. You weren’t in the right mindset to talk to anyone yet and that’s why it was so goddamn frustrating when McCabe or Mead tried to get you to talk.

You sat alone at lunch, didn’t go out with your teammates and barely stayed in contact with your sister. That was until Alessia Russo came into your life.

You didn’t mean to let her in. You decided early on that you were at Arsenal for your career and career only. But she changed that, so quick. And before you knew it you were falling for her.

She came into Arsenal and everyone was a fan of her. It seemed like she was friends with everyone instantly and it made you curious.

Alessia had been a gunner for almost a week when you realised she lived across from your apartment. She came knocking on your door one evening, offering you some of het pasta since she had made too much. You knew that she’d been searching for an opportunity to get you to talk to her but you didn’t expect her to come knocking at your door like that.

You let her in and she started to talk to you. You couldn’t exactly call it a conversation since she did all the talking and you muttered out some broken English once in a while. But even though you hated to admit it, she was nice company. It made you feel less lonely, she made you feel less empty.

You’d told Alexia about your move to Arsenal before it officially came out and she wasn’t pleased, at all. She was mad, mad that you didn’t tell her earlier. You told her what had happened and what was racing through your mind when you made the decision but she just couldn’t fathom out the thought of you feeling that way. And that made you feel even less understood, it felt like your life was slipping away from you and you only made it worse with every next move you made.

But Alessia made you feel like you were okay for a moment. After the first day of eating together she offered you food almost everyday and after a month it became a tradition, you would diner together every single day and she even learned you English. You didn’t really progress in your Duolingo streak and didn’t talk much either so the help was very much needed.

It wasn’t until the first half of the season had been played that you realised you had other feelings for her. You saw her as more than just a friend. It was all going very fast and the feelings intensified by the day, that may be because she was the only one you really could talk to. It hurt you to even think about living without her and that might’ve the first warning you should’ve seen but you didn’t.

It was Alessia who kissed you first. You both had been drinking and the two empty bottles of red wine next to your grey couch were the evidence of that. Alessia was a touchy person, just like everyone in Spain so you didn’t mind. She was giggly and teasing you relentlessly.

“I bet you think about me hmm?” she hummed and started to climb on top of you. Taken aback by the movement you didn’t really react to anything she had just said. “I want to kiss you.” she whispered into your ear that was tinted red by now. You didn’t answer. “I’m gonna kiss you now, okay.” she leaned in, placing her pink lips on your red ones. It was sweet but turned desperate very quickly.

The blonde slept sweetly beside you that evening. The thoughts raced through your mind and none of them were making any sense. It was hard to think straight with Alessia next to you, that was what made things so complicated. But now that she was laying in your bed you couldn’t not have her there, you needed her.

Alessia started to stay over more and more, it became your new normal. Half of her closet was laying in yours and she even brought her favourite mug with her. You bought all her favourite foods so she would feel comfortable and she appreciated it, just not enough to stay with you.

You came home on a Thursday evening one day but Alessia was nowhere to be found. Normally she would be laying on your couch, watching some sappy Netflix show you refused to watch with her. A bowl of nuts in her hands she didn’t really like but it was a healthy snack so it would do. But the only thing you found on your couch was her blue hoodie. Well it was yours originally but she basically claimed it as hers now.

Putting your cold groceries away you walked towards Alessia’s front door. She had given you her spare key after leaving hers in her home, locking herself out for the second time. She had bought a keychain with it, a little Barca jersey with your name and number on it. You smiled down at the colourful jersey and opened the door.

Walking in you heard some laughter coming from the living room that you could describe in detail. It was a light living room with two big windows that were open at all times, she liked it that way. She bought a brown couch after you broke her beige one. You had gifted her a few plants to make the room a real living space but knew she didn’t really care for them so you’d come in and give them water.

The photo’s in her hallway were those of her mom, dad and brothers, who she adored so much. And even though she didn’t like to have pictures of herself in her home she had one of her and her best friend Ella after winning the Euros.

When you stepped into the living area you were a bit taken aback by the man sitting next to your Alessia. His left hand was draped over her shoulder, like it was the most normal thing. His right was resting on her thigh. Who was he?

You stood still, watching the pair until Alessia noticed you. Her eyes had gone wide. “Hey, what’re you doing here?” she asked carefully. You didn’t answer. “Luke, this is my teammate, and well, this is my boyfriend Luke.” she introduced you and stalked towards your frozen form.

Boyfriend? You thought..

Alessia gave her boyfriend some weak excuse and walked you back to your apartment. You were in your own home again, a safe place. When Alessia started to talk again you cut her off. “I- you have a boyfriend? I thought we had.. something?” you looked almost lost to her. “Well, you thought wrong. Whatever you thought we had, we didn’t.” she said without any emotion behind her eyes, like she hadn’t spent the whole of last week in your house, in your bed, wearing your hoodie.

She left your house like nothing had happened.

Were you really that stupid, did you really think she’d like you. You had created this whole other reality, one where she’d actually like you and wanted to be with you.

You kept to yourself even more now. Alessia had gotten you out of your shell to some extent but now you had crawled back in again. Every moment you weren’t training or playing football you were at home but it didn’t feel like home anymore. It wasn’t as empty as it was when it arrived but it felt like it. The life had gone away and that’s not something you can fix with a few overpriced paintings and some weird cactus.

You couldn’t eat dinner without Alessia, you couldn’t watch horrible movies without Alessia and you just couldn’t sleep in a bed without Alessia.

It was the one time you decided to go out and drink that she came over to talk to you again. She acted like nothing had ever happend, like it was back to normal again, like she had slept in your bed the day before. But you liked it, craved it even. You had longed for Alessia to come back again and save you from yourself.

So she ended up in your bed and stayed long enough for you to fall asleep. But not long enough for you to wake up to her scent or her sleepy blue eyes and messy blonde hair.

It went on like that, she came home with you for the night and you forgot about all the things she had done to you and you woke up to an empty bed. You did feel bad for the Luke guy, well you did in the beginning but somewhere along the way you started to lose that sympathy.

You were mad. Angry. He could drive her to training and hold her hand out in public. He could kiss her on the streets and wake up to her snuggled next to him. He could have all those domestic little moments and gestures you longed for. It wasn’t fair.

Alessia had prepared dinner for the both of you and you were watching a movie when you felt the need to talk to her about this whole situation. “Lessi, i really like you. I want you and i to be together because i love you.” there, you said it. Alessia didn’t look at you, she stared blankly at the movie infront of her. You reached for the distraction playing on the television and paused it but she still wouldn’t look you in the eyes.

“I love you.” you repeated again, hoping for a response. She sighed, “Look, i don’t know what you think we are but we aren’t that. I don’t know how many times i have to tell you this but i have a boyfriend and you’re just there for a quick fuck. That’s all. You’re not special just because your sister has won a few trophies. I can’t do anything about the fact that you’re fucking lonely but leave me out of it.” she hissed.

You just said you loved her, for the first time. You handed her your fucking heart and she stomped on it like it was nothing. Alesia knew your relationship with your sister was complicated and being in her shadows was something that hurt you the most in this world, but yet she brought it up. You’d told her everything you never dared to say out loud and she used it to damage you even more. She is your whole world but to her you’re a ‘quick fuck’.

You were hers but she’d never be yours

“Please go away.” you asked her, tears threatening to escape your tired glossy eyes.

You were left alone in your apartment and the loneliness was more torturous than ever. The fucking lasagna Alessia had made you had turned cold and you looked at the wooden table infront of you. There was a picture of you and Alexia framed, Alessia had printed it out to make you feel more like home but it only made you miss it more, especially now.

Looking at your phone you opened your chat with your sister. You hadn’t texted her in about a month, the last text being about your mothers birthday that you couldn’t attend.

You needed her, you needed you sister to protect you. You needed her to protect you from the sun and to place you in her shadows again. For once it was all you desired.

A/N let me know what you think of the fic!! Also, i don’t know if i should write a second part and if or how i should end up Alessia and R together. I could make R fall in love with someone else too??

#woso x reader #woso fanfics #woso community #engwnt #alexia putellas x reader #alexia putellas #alessia russo #alessia russo x reader #arsenalwomen #arsenal wfc #arsenal women #arsenalwfc x reader #barca femeni #barcelona femeni #barca women #angst #shadows are to protect

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andrew-thy-accursed · 7 days ago

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Akerlund dressed Ann Marit in the same jacket Pelle had, he gave her the very similar baggy clothes in that scene, he gave her the same hair color as Pelle, he filmed them kissing from behind her back, the entire sex scene was filmed in the way that you could just squint a bit and you would think it's Pelle there instead of her in that darkness. Then he thought about Pelle immediately after sex. Cried because of him, twice. She finds photos of Pelle and Øystein and tells him that he really do misses him and he just grabs the box from her hands without the word, as if she found photos of his ex girlfriend. Then he ends the film with the photo of the two of them. Jonas is the biggest EuroDead shipper

FUCK. YOURE SO FUCKING RIGHT AND I DIDNT EVEN CATCH IT DUDE...I've rewatched this fucking movie 10 times this year alone it was right in my fucking face the whole time ... these scenes have graced me with perfect crops to imagine it's EuroDead in my survival AU thank you I am indebted to you🙏🙏🙏

#black metal #mayhem #lords of chaos #ask response #øystein aarseth #euronymous #per yngve ohlin #Pelle ohlin #dead mayhem #eurodead #1995*#🩸🪓

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hannahssimblr · 5 days ago

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Jen, though different in her appearance, is the same as I remember. Our last meeting, at Christmastime, we took a walk in the dark misery of St. Stephen’s day. Lights twinkled in the eaves of the seafront houses, reflecting on the slick tarmac after days of rain, and as usual, with Jen I felt normal, like nothing had really changed all that much since I moved away.

“There you are,” she says, like she saw me yesterday.

“Your hair’s pink.” I say.

“It is, yeah.”

Now she is burying her face in the front of my coat, and her arms are stiff from the layers of clothing she’s wrapped around herself. From my chest, her voice is muffled. “Have you gotten taller?”

“I think you’ve shrunk, Jenny.”

“Probably my horrible diet. Can you imagine, I’ve not eaten a vegetable since Christmas?”

“I actually can imagine that.”

“Why? Do I look deathly?”

“No, you look nice.” She tilts her face to me, her round cheeks and upturned nose pink from the cold. “I’m still getting used to not seeing you every day.”

“It’s been a good while since you moved. Time you get used to it.”

I smile. “Are you hungry?”

“Starving.”

“Come on, then. We haven’t far to go.”

“This is actually pretty good,” Jen says, eating around the braised fennel on her plate, and picking out only the pieces of chicken. “Is there lemon in it, or something?”

“Lemon and some other stuff, yeah.”

“It’s tasty.”

“Jude is an excellent cook,” Astrid says. “I’m very lucky to have a boyfriend who cooks almost like a chef.”

“Yeah, you are,” Jen replies.

The apartment is warm and clean, candles lit around the little living area, and one on the table, casting a warm glow over the food. It looks like a place an adult would live, one with intentional design choices, the right lampshades sourced from second-hand shops, artfully stacked books on the coffee table and all the little things one can accumulate just from living having found their place in organised drawers, or little ceramic bowls placed around the place. In the bathroom, there is incense lighting, and a little bouquet of dried flowers in an amber glass vase by the sink. It matches the other amber glassware, containing soap and lotion and shampoos, all carefully chosen from heaps of rubbish at flea markets. Only Astrid’s artistic eye could spot the potential in junk, take it home, clean it up, and make it worthy.

When I was at Jen’s little kip in Ranelagh a couple of months ago, I got drunk and drew a crude, biro drawing of a little bald man with a huge bare arse. I gave him a speech bubble saying ‘TIOLET’, and we stuck it to her bathroom door so that nobody would get lost trying to find it. We fell about laughing at it until I thought I’d get sick. Now, weeks later, I have served her roasted chicken marinated in ouzo on a table with linen placemats. I ignore the blatant divergence in how I have presented myself, and pray she doesn’t bring it up.

“Jen, won’t you eat the fennel?” Jonas says. He’s finished his dinner, and she offers him the remains of hers. He piles her vegetables onto his plate. “It is so delicious, you know. It makes me wish Jude would cook for me at home.”

“He doesn’t?”

He laughs. “Not once. He’s always eating out or making toast for dinner.”

“That’s crazy. Jude! You’ve always been good at cooking. Why haven’t you treated your poor, suffering housemate?” Jen gapes at me in mock outrage while clinging to the sleeve of his shirt. He chuckles. He likes her. She likes him. I knew it would be like this, because everyone likes Jen, and everyone likes Jonas, and these people, the kinds that are easy to like, easy to get along with, fall into a simple rhythm with one another every time they encounter one another. This is one of the many benefits of having a personality that others do not find challenging.

“I should,” I admit. “I’m just busy, you know?”

“Busy being a bad housemate! I can’t believe this.”

“Me neither,” Jonas nods, making valiant inroads into his second helping. “All this time, I thought you were some typical kind of student who cannot make even a bowl of pasta.”

“Well, I’ve proved you wrong.”

“You have. I misjudged you.”

“I’m surprised to hear you talk about Jude like this,” Astrid says. “I don’t see him that way.”

“Like what? Unable to cook pasta?” says Jen.

“That he’s so irresponsible. For me, this has been a very grounding relationship. I feel he’s a steady person.”

How did I get this woman? I think, for at least the fourth time this evening. How have I been so fortunate?

Jen’s raucous laugh shatters the moment. “Him?” She says. “You find him to be reliable?”

“Well, yes, actually.”

“Easy know that you didn’t know him at school.”

“Oh, really?” Intrigue twinkles in Jonas’ eye.

“Yes, he was a complete wild card. You should start just asking him to tally up the amount of days he was in detention over the six years. The things I witnessed…”

“He tells me almost nothing about his life in Ireland!” Jonas tosses his napkin onto the plate, and I roll my eyes. “There’s not much to tell. I’ve said already that Ireland was crap. There was never anything to do.”

“That’s true,” Jen says, “fair enough. But we made our own fun. We weren’t ever bored for long.”

“This makes more sense to me,” says Jonas, “I had a feeling there was more to you than what you have told me.”

“Jude, I can’t believe you haven’t been sharing your hilarious stories. I swear to God, he’s gotten up to the funniest things. There was never a dull moment when we were growing up.”

“Yeah, we had a lot of fun, alright. We were really stupid kids.”

“We’re still stupid kids, what are you on about?” Jen grabs Jonas’ arm again while she giggles into her sleeve. “Did you know Jude got suspended from school twice?”

“Twice?” He echoes. “For what?”

“Right, okay,” I protest. “One was for fighting. That was bad. I’m not proud of it.”

“And the other was for starting a fire in the boys’ toilets.”

I glance at Astrid, who has something related to a smile on her lips, but it’s clear she’s confused, a small line forming between her brows. “Why would someone do that?” She wonders. “Was it on purpose?”

“No, no! It was a total accident,” Jen lets out a squawk of laughter before launching into the story. “So, set the scene, boys’ toilets, 2004…”

With dirty plates cleared and the dishwasher humming, we take our conversation to the little nook of Astrid’s studio apartment that closest resembles a living room. Our bodies are strewn around on big, soft, thrift shop furniture, where we talk and laugh until our bellies hurt. Jen wipes tears of laugher with the front of her t-shirt, legs thrown across Jonas as he tells us stories from his teen years, of ghost chilli peppers, and dirty mop water and stolen costumes from the theatre, painting an image of himself more mischievous and silly than the sensible man I’ve met, who reads the political column in the newspaper over his morning coffee.

We have lost track of time, and the candle wax is making castles at the bases of Astrid’s brass candelabras. She is sitting politely while we throw ourselves about, howling with laughter, no longer at the stories, but at how silly we are being. Finding hilarity in our own hysteria. Giddy from it. At some relevant point, Jen shows Jonas a picture on her phone of the drawing I made for her bathroom door, and the laughter starts again. He shoves his knuckles into his eyes to stop the tears. “You misspelt it,” he wheezes. “The word toilet. It was on purpose?”

“Of course, like, what, we can’t speak English?”

Astrid sighs, and examines her bare foot, rested against the coffee table. I present my hand to her, and she drops hers into it so I can massage it with my thumb. She gives me a humourless smile that doesn’t touch her eyes. “Are you tired?” I murmur.

“Yes, a bit.”

“Astrid,” Jen says, “I was actually wondering if you have any stories from school, sorry! I should have asked you earlier. As in, what’s the funniest thing that ever happened to you?”

She hesitates.

“Or anyone, really. It doesn’t have to be you specifically, just, like, something you heard.”

“I can’t think of anything.”

“Surely there’s something,” I insist, though it’s hard for me to imagine Astrid at school. I attempt to conjure her at a desk, being told what to do by a teacher, sitting in a cafeteria eating a packed lunch, but I can’t. I can see a girl doing it, some faceless blonde girl, but not Astrid. She’s too sophisticated to have ever been in a school, with sticky linoleum flooring and bathroom stalls studded with chewing gum. This woman wasn’t born, but materialised one day, and has been swanning around Europe being mesmerising ever since.

“What kind of school did you go to?” Jen says. “Mixed? Like, boys and girls?”

“Yeah.”

“I feel like there’s always a story about that. Like, in our school, someone got fingered in the science lab.”

“Well, that’s just disgusting.”

“I agree with you. Foul.”

We’re all smiling at her, nodding in encouragement, but she looks mildly irritated. At last, she sighs. “Someone once threw an eraser into the teacher’s coffee mug.”

A pause.

“And then?” Jonas says.

“And then it splashed, and the teacher got coffee on her shirt.”

“Oh! That’s funny!” Jen leaps in. “God, I used to get tea down my uniform all the time. And then you’re there walking around all day with a stained shirt. So embarrassing.”

Astrid frowns. “Okay, well, I just don’t think my school was like your schools. Nobody was doing anything disruptive. We just had our classes, talked to friends and we went home. I don’t know why someone would want to cause such a fuss. It annoys everybody when some students are being so problematic.”

“Yeah, we were fairly annoying alright,” I say. “I suppose it really shows up the differences between places like Ireland and Denmark, doesn’t it?”

“Yeah, I’m sure it was very nice to go to school there.” Jen gives her very best, warm smile, which Astrid does not return. I make a note to tell Jen it’s not personal later, that Astrid’s smiles are an extremely rare event.

Astrid doesn't reply.

The smell of an extinguished candle drifts beneath my nose. I suddenly feel a bit awkward.

“It’s kind of late.” I point out. ‘Maybe we should go.”

“Oh, yes, I’m tired,” she says. “I’d really like to go to bed.”

We get up and put on our coats, and as I bend to kiss her goodbye, she murmurs, “It was good of you to cook.”

“Anytime, love.”

“Good. You should do it more.”

“You think so?”

“Mm.”

“Then I will. Just tell me what you want and I'll make it.”

“I will.”

I kiss her cheek. “Goodnight. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Goodnight, Jude. Love you.”

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#lucky boy 2011 #sims 4 story #sims story #ts4 story #simblr #simblr story #show us your sims #show us your story

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spectraling · 2 years ago

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Jonas "head-empty-no-thoughts" Kahnwald <3

It's primary purpose is def for the audience, but it's really interesting to speculate on what the significance is in-universe lol. Tbf since Jonas is so fantastically wrong about the nature of time travel it actually does make sense that he would still be trying to make sense of it. That's definitely not what the mess is for, tho. He's clearly not solving a mystery. He doesn't put up the newspaper clipping and scribbles "When (is Mikkel)" on it bc he's genuinely asking himself that question, he's mocking the ignorance of it. Some people have speculated he's doing it bc he's sort of psyching himself up for what he has to do. Considering these are all things he brought with him, it's also possible it's actually Jonas' own belongings that he's collected over the years and he brings them to remind himself where he came from.....or to make it feel like home lol. There's papers on things like the greek mythology of Ariadne, which obviously would have a very emotional value to him. In his mind this is the final act of decades of work, where he might finally make things right and finally end his own suffering by essentially dying, so maybe he's being a bit melodramatic about the whole thing. Or it's possible he's just gone a little bit insane, which I am affording him. He's allowed to be insane, as a treat.

But yeah, at this point in time Jonas is still tracing his steps and Regina talking to Clausen causing the apocalypse is well within his motivations, bc in his mind he has to follow protocol in order to get to the point of destroying the loophole. Maybe the mess in the hotel room is part of that. Asking him to not put up the papers in order to collapse the entire knot is like asking him why he does anything he does in s1, or why any character make the choices they make. The thing with the loophole is that it's been presumably set up by his younger self so that when his older self does it "this time" the outcome will be different. So he never strays from the path really, the path has just been slightly altered for him, which is why it supposedly works. If he changes the path he won't become the person he currently is. If he doesn't do what "always has happened" he won't achieve his own goal.

he simply doesn't know about this and how his actions might cause the apocalypse in a very indirect manner (all of his actions cause the apocalypse tho, lol). He might not know about Clausen and his conversations with Regina at all. He never interacts with, is directly told about or reacts to Clausen's investigation of him. Hannah knows about it, but we can't say for sure she ever told him. He stays on the dl a lot in s2 which could indicate he knows something's up but I think he just simply has nowhere to go, any desire to do so and also clearly is doing his best to avoid contact with characters like Martha. Speaking of whom, when he locks her in the bunker he's not aware that doing so is what causes her to be killed in the first place. Every moment in his life is uncharted territory and he has no idea if the things he does is going to make things right or go horribly wrong (they go 100% horribly wrong 100% of the time, but it takes a very long time for Jonas to accept this).

I also would like to point out that while Noah tells Jonas some things that make sense we have to remember that Jonas has been specifically put in a situation where he leans towards trusting Claudia bc of her indoctrination and his lack of other options, perspective and knowledge. He knows Noah ultimately works in Adam's best interest and not doing what Claudia wants might be playing right into his hands. Jonas going against what Noah says is completely understandable. They're not friends, their relationship is strained at the best of times. This is what makes the entire situation in the post-apocalypse such an ingenious setup, bc the only person he can really talk to that is in the know is also a servant of the enemy. Elisabeth is also there, but she in turn has been indoctrinated by Noah to trust Adam.

However, I think it's also clear that at this time (and during a lot of Stranger Jonas' specific arc) Jonas is definitely conflicted, about trusting Claudia or anyone for that matter, including himself.

This is not the face of a man who is 100% sure about what he's doing or who to trust. It's not like Jonas didn't have his misgivings with Claudia long before Noah could ever mention it, he's distrustful of her from the get-go in 2020. This conversation is merely bringing up the doubt Jonas already has and it terrifies him. He has no allies, he has no other way to uncover information unlike Noah and Claudia. He simply has no other options than to attempt something he has not yet attempted. If having to choose, he's going to choose Claudia's idea over his biggest enemy. Imagine yourself in his shoes. If he doesn't attempt to destroy the loophole and everything still goes to shit, had he maybe been able to make things right if it wasn't for his inaction? This is the existential dread of Dark in a nutshell :')

When he finally gets to talk to Tannhaus in private he's desperately trying to get some answers out of him bc he's trying to find his own truth in this whole situation and they are teetering on the edge of understanding it so much that in hindsight their conversations make me want to flip tables bc they are so heavily laced with foreshadowing the true nature of the entire plot. But in the end, Tannhaus is just another pawn, just like Jonas himself, and they have no way of seeing the entire puzzle for what it is.

But yes, Jonas is definitely a character that 100% operates on emotion and is by nature a bit naive, which is why he finds himself in some of the situations he does (and is so much fun and frustrating to watch). But I think people also tend to vastly underestimate how isolated he is in the post-apocalypse and vastly overestimate how much he knows at the point when he becomes the Stranger. He doesn't know much of the family tree outside of what directly concerns him (he doesn't even know who Charlotte's parents are even tho he lived with them for decades), he's never had access to the notebook, he doesn't know about the alt world.....basically Jonas 33 years in the future knows about as much as Jonas at the point of the apocalypse in 2020, and that.....is not a whole lot, lol.

Look at this family tree, it doesn't tell you anything beyond that Mikkel is Michael and that Jonas becomes....himself.

Dark writers during s2: In this scene we're gonna do a s1 parallel

Andreas: Exciting! What kind of philosophical sentiment am I echoing here?

Andreas: Oh

#dark spoilers #jonas kahnwald #long post #if I had a nickel for every time I do a thirst post about stranger jonas and it turns into a long philosophical discussion #I would have two nickels #which isn't a lot but it's weird it happened twice #now imagining jonas finding the ariadne play in the old local library or something and breaking down into tears :')

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powermove102 · 1 year ago

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1888 is the FUNNIEST Dark era for me.

First up, you've got Jonas appearing out of nowhere, middle-aged, after being missing for half a year, and he's all like 'leave your damn families, *I'm* gonna save you xx', before plonking them all off in said 1888, which I can only imagine going down with a 'Where are we, Jonas?' '.... fuuuuuuck....'

Then the previously discussed 'how do you do, fellow kids?' energy because he is *50 years old* and they are *not*, paired with the fact that he is likely awkward as FUCK since they don't have much to talk about anymore (and this man is socially deprived, he only gets to chat to someone about the loop every once in a while).

And the building resentment. Oooooooooo do we like some yummy tension within the group, because they can't really trust him, he feels he's failed them but is still determined to save them whist STILL resisting Adam-ification. Juicy, I tell you.

Also what are they doing all day. Literally. Jonas I assume spends most of his time tweaking the machine but like? What else? What do the others do? It's so damn hilarious how bored and annoyed out of their minds they must be that they (at least Magnus) WISHED the apocalypse had nuked them too.

#dark netflix #netflix dark #jonas kahnwald #stranger jonas #magnus nielsen #franziska doppler #bartosz tiedemann #and then alt martha stirred shit up #but it was already funny beforehand

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i-can-read-to-him · 3 months ago

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The Wesper Fic Club's Author Spotlight is a post series that aims to feature two to three fic authors a month, randomly selected from a pool of names put forth on our server. The authors are then asked to answer three interview questions, select up to five of their fics for us to feature, and finally, recommend three fics by others in the fandom.

(Note: Our spotlighted fics are not limited to Wesper, though they tend to be a central pairing in most of our authors' featured works.)

This week, we are putting a spotlight on Lou's writing!

Socials: @waterloou (Tumblr) | hugharekillianmelou (AO3)

❀

Part One: Author Interview

Q: What do you consider your strengths as a writer?

A: I’m using these quotes from sparrow bc I’m gonna be honest and say I really don’t know how to perceive myself: “Off the top of my head, I would say you are very good at lyrical prose, imagery and atmosphere, thoughtful characterization, anddd I don’t know how to articulate this as cleanly, but like… the way you handle dark subject matter (like MCD) in a way that makes it feel... like something that should be dangerous to handle, but it is safely contained. Like one of those poisonous Victorian era books with the striking green colour [Scheele's Green] displayed in a glass case. Also, you maintain canon characterization even in AU settings, which is honestly a skill not everyone has. I love AUs, but some people lose sight of canon so quick and it ends up feeling very OOC.”

Q: What’s your favourite fic you’ve written for this fandom?

A: It’s called Lay Me Gently in the Cold Dark Earth and it’s from Wylan’s perspective when he’s 6 feet under and how he interacts with the earth around him and Jesper. Idk how else to describe it.

Q: What advice do you have for those facing writer’s block?

A: My only suggestion is just to switch to notebooks and use prompt lists. I struggle with writers block far too much it’s hard for me to sit down and write something most of the time.

Q: When did you first start writing? What keeps you going today?

A: Jonas Brothers YouTube imagines. I had a little flip notebook on a family vacation and lots of time to kill so I wrote my own imagines/fanfiction. It was also like not a self insert but like I’d insert someone age appropriate and live vicariously through them. I have so so many ideas and only I can execute them correctly so obviously I need to keep writing. It’s a tough job but if I want the content I need to make it

Q: Who is your favourite character? What do you love about them?

A: JESPER LLEWELLYN FAHEY!!!! He’s just so complex and loving and I also relate to him most bc of his sadness and feelings of inadequacy and using humor as a cover up. I saw the trailers before I read the books and then I read the books before I watched the show but that one clip of Jesper in those first trailers had me hooked ever since.

Q: If you could travel anywhere in the Grishaverse, where would you go?

A: Shu Han because it looks like I’d have the most fun there.

Q: If you could be friends with any character in the Grishaverse, who would it be?

A: Tolya!!! He’s got a lovely disposition and it’s nice to have someone with similar interests.

Q: Have you had a chance to interact with the SAB cast? Tell us about your experience(s).

A: The only interaction I’ve had is Jack liking my drawing of him. Honestly tho even tho this cast is amazing I think I’d be fine never meeting any of them. There’s already all my questions answered and I’d probably make a fool out of myself if I met them.

Q: What are some recurring themes you’ve noticed in your writing?

A: I am using more sparrow quotes bc my only answer was “Hozier coded” and idk if that answer was enough: “I think grief/death/mourning is definitely something that comes up a lot. Related to that... I want to say 'transcendent love,' if that makes sense. Definitely also strong platonic bonds, so friendship... Oh, balance and opposites (how the latter interacts and achieves balance)... sometimes with concepts like life and death, but also with people like Wylan and Jesper.” Ty sparrow ur iconic

Q: What kind of music do you like to listen to while writing?

A: Hozier, lots of like folk or floaty type of genres.

Q: Are there any songs you strongly associate with a favourite character or ship?

A: "half return" by Adrianne Lenker could be associated with either Wylan or Jesper and their childhoods. I do think it’s odd that this is the first fandom where music is not the driving force of my writing or associating with characters.

Q: What is one of your favourite scenes from the source material (book or show)?

A: Jesper’s introduction in the show is a classic and he’s just SO COOL.

Q: If could change anything about (book or show) canon, what would it be?

A: 😭 besides it being cancelled? Matthias’ fate.

Q: What are some headcanons you have that you consider your personal canon?

A: MODERN AU: Jesper is an engineering major. Wylan is a chemistry major (hates it), switches to biology and music double major. Jesper makes and sells jewelry on the side. REGULAR SETTING: Jesper lives for a long long time and Wylan reincarnates many times and they are together until they both pass.

Q: Tell us about something in your fics that you’re proud of and wish would get more notice.

A: I do like the poetic flow they have from time to time! It’s nice reading something I wrote and being invested. This is a cop out answer but I think they’ve been appreciated an adequate amount! Everyone is so sweet reading and commenting!

Q: What’s something you haven’t written yet, but want to write in the future?

A: OH BOY I have a list: - This is written but mouse wylan - sci fi au - Hozier song wesper series - human meat business crows serial killers - Hellraiser au wesper - whump wesper jesper shot - Halloween series - vampire crows au

Q: What’s something you wish you could write, but don’t think you ever will?

A: Most of the ideas listed above. My brain just doesn’t want to write the ideas. Also Smut. Did it once idk if I could write it again

Q: How do you feel about your fics being translated into other languages?

A: Go ham. As long as it’s credited to me idc

Q: Apart from sight, what is your favourite of the senses to describe when writing?

A: Touch I love touch descriptions because you can get an insight into how the characters experience the world.

❀

Part Two: Selected Works

Two corpses we were, two corpses I saw

Not Rated | 275 words | Wesper Hozier coded, Decay, Burial, Happy Ending

Short diddy about knight/pianist wesper

Golden slumbers

Teen | 460 words | Wesper Grief/Mourning, Pre-Grief, Aging, Jesper-centric

Jesper would always be a mourner

Lay me gently in the cold dark earth

Not Rated | 388 words | Wesper Hozier coded, POV Wylan, Character Death, Happy Ending

Wylan needs Jesper, even after life

❀

Part Three: Author's Recs

without pity by demigodbeautiies

Mature | 21.9K | Wesper Non-Con Drug Use, Whump, Mild Gore, Angst with a Happy Ending

It’s 10 am on a Wednesday when Wylan Van Eck’s life crumbles around him. Which feels ridiculous, honestly, but that’s life, isn’t it? - Jesper gets drugged with jurda parem. Wylan tries his best to deal with it. That, apparently, is hard to do when his life is falling apart.

A Lack Of Air Supply by Milkfrog

Mature | 106.7K | Wesper Past Child Abuse, Agoraphobia, Hurt/Comfort, Hurt Wylan Van Eck

"Wylan Van Eck, until the age of 8, felt like royalty. Like the world was made for him, and him alone. He could do anything he wanted to. He could dream of a future so expansive he'd have to live multiple lives in order to fit everything he wanted to do. But Wylan Van Eck, at 22 years old, cannot even leave his apartment." (aka. Wylan has agoraphobia n Jesper moves into the apartment next to him <3)

Before Sunrise by @aphroditestummyrolls

General | 2.1K | Colm & Jesper, Colm/Aditi Good Parent Colm Fahey, Colm-centric, Baby Jesper

He’d like to say he expected it— it’s a well known fact that babies cry. The first months of parenthood are a tiring business. That was what everyone said, and the ones who didn’t say it were certainly thinking it. But, not all babies cried like Jesper Fahey cried. Just like every night for the past 2 and a half months, the second Addy stopped her gentle rocking and pacing, it started up again— first, as disgruntled fussing, huffing and puffing like a grumpy little bear cub. His downy fluff of curls pressed against his mama’s palm as he scrubbed his nose into her collarbone, tiny fist clenching in her night dress. Colm sighed. OR Jesper is a colicky little baby, and Colm just wants his poor wife to be able to sleep.

❀

Please support our authors by commenting and leaving kudos on any stories of theirs you read and enjoy! Don't forget to also reblog this post and check back soon for our next author spotlight to come.

Interested in joining our server and getting to know our community? Feel free to request an invite via the @i-can-read-to-him ask box.

#waterloou #shadow and bone #six of crows #wesper #wesper fic club #author spotlight #wfc author spotlight #fanfiction #wylan van eck #jesper fahey #fic recs

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yellow-dejavu · 12 days ago

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Dark characters were wrong about a lot of things, but one thing they were right about was knowing that Charlotte was awesome. It is so funny and interesting how there was something about her that made the others characters want to tell her the crazy things they were involved in. It was almost like every time they had a problem in the 2019/2020 timeline, they called Charlotte. The characters in that era were like, who can I call who's smart and cool and won't think I'm crazy for telling them about some weird conspiracy? They all nodded and said: Charlotte! We have to call Charlotte.

In Season 1:

Peter was acting all weird because of his involvement when Mad's body reappeared. He was trying to tell Charlotte all season, until he did it in the finale. Peter was cheating and not really being nice to her, but even he knew that the only one who could help him understand any of it was his smart and beautiful wife.

When Ulrich followed Helge into the caves, he left a voicemail for Charlotte. He did this in both worlds.

Even Jonas, when he goes to 1986 to get Mikkel. Jonas just tells young Charlotte his plans for no reason. Jonas could have told Charlotte anything, but he tells her exactly the truth that he is trying to bring someone back from the dead.

In season 2:

Stranger Jonas goes to see his mother in the 2019/2020 timeline. Hannah thinks they need to tell someone. Who does she call? Charlotte. Literally the wildest thing has happened to Hannah. Her missing teenage son has returned to her as a middle-aged man, and she decides that the person who can somehow help her is Charlotte.

Magnus, Franziska and Elisabeth gained the knowledge of time travel because of Bartosz. When they decided to tell someone about it, they went to Charlotte and Peter.

At the end of season 2, Wöller tells Charlotte about what he and Aleksander did with the yellow barrels. Wöller's confession + the other information she has gathered lead Charlotte to the conclusion that Clausen will trigger the apocalypse by opening the barrels. Charlotte tells Wöller some crazy stuff about time travel. He has no idea what she is talking about, but follows her anyway.

In Season 3, Hannah blackmailed Aleksander, which is a very likely thing for her to do. She also did it in season 1 in Adam's world. The outcome in Eva's world is very different. In Adam's world, Hannah tells Aleksander to destroy Ulrich's life. He makes some phone calls and tries to do it, but Ulrich is already gone from this timeline. In Eva's world, Hannah tells Aleksander to ruin Charlotte's life instead. This time, Aleksander decides to come clean and show Charlotte the shady stuff the nuclear power plant has been hiding, triggering the apocalypse to happen earlier in Eva's world. Imagine being so cool that the apocalypse happens earlier because someone just doesn't want to try to ruin your life. I just love how Charlotte was thinking outside of the box and how she was genuinely nice to everyone.

#charlotte doppler #my beloved #appreciation post #karoline eichhorn #stephanie amarell #dark netflix #she was the best #a great character #i posted this #if she was on a ship in 1899 there would be people trauma dumping on her in all languagues #i just know that #she just has the vibe that you can tell her anything

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domquixotedospobresblog · 2 months ago

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A real guy, a respectable man, he has his qualities, but he also has his defects, a hard worker who strives to honor his commitments, he doesn't like to sit still, he's always finding work, whether at home or on the street, he works under the sun, if necessary he also does extra work under the moon, this guy is funny, I can hardly stand it, in the live streams he only watches, I think he's jealous, his love has a great sense of humor, maybe he's afraid that some poet will steal his love, he loves her and she loves him too, even with so many setbacks they always resolve things in bed, they're happy for a reason, and by her smile you can imagine that the night was good, this burly dark-haired man knows how to win over a woman, many desire her, but she only wants Dino.

Jonas r Cezar

#micro crônica #jonas r cezar #music #my playlist #jimmy page #the edge #jack white

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jazzically · 1 month ago

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OK I FINISHED S4!!!! lot to catch up on. OHHHH MYYYY GOD. OG MY GOD

that literally broke me im

i think this series would work really well as a comic i can see it in my mind

i NEED to draw so many things from 159 but i cant draw

OH MY GOD OHH MY GOD AAAAAH MY FRICKING HEART

you know what i dont care this post is gonna be all about jmart/mag 159 the last!!!!!!! (well mostly) screams and cries and dies

i really loved you, you know?

i started like. shaking and crying (but without the tears which was really weird maybe i'm dehydrated) right in the middle of peter's statement ahfskhdkdmdudndj

i had my earbuds in and the sound design was brilliant. the way martin's voice was like floating around and around....!!!!!! it made me think of the final bossfight from LN1 [minor spoilers for little nightmares 1] where the lady is just zooming around the dark periphery and six has to fend her off with a mirror

also the Lonely? i have a picture of the beach that happens to match what i imagined almost exactly:

wow the clouds kinda make the shape of an eye now that i think about it. ANYWAY I LOVE THEM SO MUCH SILLY LITTLE DOOMED MEN oh my god the extent to which i was rooting for them was probably unhealthy i was SO SO SO scared that he wouldnt find martin ever again because of what alex said in the s3 qna BUT FALSE ALARM THEY'RE OKAY!!!!!!! jesus christ i got so afraid UGHHHDDHHDDBKDBFKDBDK ofbsiskdbdkhdiabsk

i was kinda mad at jon for the entirety of s4 but its okay because he's entering his redemption arc!! [he brings Armageddon by being compelled to read jonas's statement] .....never mind anyway bros character development is coming along fantastically and the final reveals in the last few eps of s4 got me squealing OH MY YYYYHSISBSOAHSKSBDKDBDOSHAOSPDL

MARTIN DID IT ALL FOR HIM

the writing for that episode screwed me up and i went to bed and woke up brain rotting on TMA i probably even dreamed about it who knows

sobning my eyebalsf out that was SO GOOD

i cannot believe im only 40 episodes away from finishing it??? thats making me really want to slow down and basically.......listen through the first 4 seasons a second time before starting s5..... like genuinely i might do it. or at least s4. advice is welcome.. i love it i love it i am so sorry to myself that i gave it up earlier when my friend first recommended it to me (and again when another friend recommended it to me; jeez m attention span needs work)

UGH JOHN THE ARCHIVE IS INSANE IM

explodes into a pile of happy brain chemicals

#tma #the magnus archives #tl;dr i'm yapping about the s4 finale #“yapping” more like completely losijg my marbles #jazz freaks out about tma #tma s4 #tma s4 spoilers #mag 159 #mag 160

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theeccentricraven · 5 months ago

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OC Origins

Thank you @kaylinalexanderbooks for the tag! This is an especially fun one.

Rules: talk about the origins of the names and personalities (and maybe even the design?) of a couple of your OCs!

From The Blood Cleaners

Justin

When I got the idea for The Blood Cleaners back in 2006, I knew early on that I wanted a male protagonist. He was largely inspired by Jonas of Lois Lowry’s The Giver and Equality 7-2521 of Ayn Rand’s Anthem. Like them, he would be determined to stand up to the status quo to choose his own life. I imagined he would be determined for justice, both justice for himself and justice for the people around him, hence the name Justin fitted him perfectly. It was even more fitting when I later met a new friend named Justen who reminded me a lot of my own Justin with his determination to defend liberty and live his life with purpose.

It took a long time to come up with Justin’s appearance and age. Originally I just imagined a dark-haired boy. As I developed the dystopian world of Corpa - a completely self-sufficient city - I knew I needed a place where it would be realistic to have quarries and mines. I picked Arizona as a location (though I did take some liberty to craft a fictional location). I then felt it would make sense for most of the population to be of Hispanic descent and have brown skin. Latin-American culture matters a lot to me since I studied Spanish for years, love the culture, have many friends of Hispanic heritage, and have nieces and nephews with Latino ancestry, too. I thought it would make sense for the nuclear war apocalypse to create a bottleneck in the population, hence the survivors would mostly be people of color and so their descendants also would be. Ultimately, I decided to have Chapter 1 begin with Justin at age 8 when he makes the two key discoveries that serve as the inciting incidents of the two main plotlines, and then the rest of the story would be about Justin at age sixteen. The age made sense since sixteen makes more sense to begin an occupation rather than twelve, and because the content and subject material of the book should be reserved for readers sixteen and up (age of the character often represents the ideal age of the reader).

So that’s how I made sixteen year old brown skinned, black haired Justin who is determined to fight for his freedom.

Joselyn

Originally I thought Justin’s only love interest would be Clarice (I’ll tell her story in a future post). Clarice is one of the children of the Fists - the government and ruling class of Corpa - who lives in the Steel Castle. Justin would meet Clarice after earning the privilege to work in the Steel. The problem was that she would be absent for much of the story. For Justin to get to work in the Steel, he would have to first go through the training, the torturous transformation, work as a blood cleaner for a while, and slowly discover his telekinetic powers. This would be a lot without a love interest. When I started the revival process for The Blood Cleaners last year, I put behind a lot of years of regret for not writing. Not knowing how many books I would get to write for the rest of my life, I wanted to cover what I would regret not doing. For a long time, I wanted to have a story where two characters bump into each other after running around a corner. I wanted it to be a type of “meet cute”. I gradually came up with the idea of having Justin at age eight unwittingly bump into his future love interest when they were chased by two separate groups of people. This allowed for Chapter 1 to start with the inciting incidents for two of the major plotlines. First inciting incident was when Justin discovered the secret note. Second inciting incident was him running into Joselyn, beginning their romance plotline. I named Joselyn after Jocelyn of the film A Knight’s Tale. I used S instead of C to make them different.

I wanted to make Joselyn and Justin be parallels and opposites. Unlike him, she lives on the surface, not underground. Like him, she’s one of the common people as she lives on a farm. I did this partly for world development, since I wanted to show how the farms played a part in the self-sufficient city. I also made her be a Spanish speaker, since Corpa has a good deal of English and Spanish speakers. I describe Justin and Joselyn having similar features with brown skin and black hair, though they are not related (thank heavens!). They have a familiar ancestry, as Justin’s late father was also a commoner on the surface. Joselyn’s farmgirl characteristics might have had some influence from the love interest in Anthem, Liberty 5-3000. I make it clear that Joselyn is a capable girl, not a vulnerable damsel in distress. She has similar beliefs as Justin, though she’s more outspoken, no concern for how speaking her mind could threaten her life. She’s good at taking charge, though she begins with self-esteem struggles. I don’t like the way that the media has a tendency to either portray a smart female character who needs to deal with the dumb guy getting in her way or to portray a dumb female who needs a smart guy to rescue her. I defied the tropes by having Justin be a constant support for Joselyn, helping her get out of a rut, not in a way that shows he’s capable and she’s incapable, but that they are both capable and need support from each other.

I knew from the beginning that this meant there would be a love triangle because I did not want to cut Clarice - she plays a vital role in the story. I like having the love triangle be different from the usual love triangle tropes. I’ve observed that most love triangles are a girl choosing between two guys. When a love triangle is between a guy and two girls, the girls will often be nasty and the guy will be a jerk. I wanted my love triangle to be more innocent, in which both of the girls are worthy of and need to be loved. Justin never meant harm, as it happened because he didn’t want to hurt either Joselyn or Clarice and he genuinely fell in love with both of them. I won’t give away too much, but can say Justin will regret the heartbreak when it happens. As with any love triangle, a choice must be made, but I won’t give that away.