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deadcactuswalking · 5 months

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REVIEWING THE CHARTS: 27/04/2024 (Taylor Swift's THE TORTURED POETS DEPARTMENT, Drake's "Push Ups", Headie One/Stormzy/Tay Keith)

Let’s talk about Taylor Swift.

#4 - “Down Bad” - Taylor Swift

Produced by Jack Antonoff and Taylor Swift

Yeah, I’m cactus, welcome back to REVIEWING THE CHARTS, blah, blah, blah - I don’t like bending the format of this series, which actually fares quite well for a massive artist who will inevitably debut on top as it ensures a build-up to the big smash hit, but I also like reflecting the culture I write about. Taylor is such a cultural monolith in much of the English-speaking world and outside of it that despite the episode now having to end with her biggest competitor, Drake, he still doesn’t even stain this week’s biggest story, and really, only news story in an industry less and less important, and further removed from the concept of monoculture outside of freak accident white women like Taylor or Barbie than ever. Regardless of my opinions on her output, I may have to respect and reflect her sheer capability to produce discourse, reaction and most importantly, for people to actually give a shit about analysing music.

Now if we’re talking opinions on her output… you can probably get more out of me from looking at my first impressions account of listening to the new Taylor Swift album on RateYourMusic in my 2024 listening log (the account name is exclusivelytopostown). Oh, yeah, if you somehow don’t know, Taylor Swift released an album called The Tortured Poets Anthology and then two hours later, reissued it with the subtitle The Anthology, and naturally, broke all kinds of Spotify records, got a billion streams in a week, what have you. I have less to say about these individual songs than I do about the album, so I’ll try to weave it in but the crux of my takeaway is that this album’s title naturally leads to polarising results and it’s no surprise that she has compelled and practically controlled pop music and celebrity discourse for the entire week… it’s also her worst album attached directly with my favourite piece of full-length work she’s ever released.

Whilst there are plenty of in-depth reasons to compare and contrast the two releases, from here on referred to as ‘sides’ even though I’m not actually sure how the physical releases for this one worked out, the primary reasons for my stark difference in opinion lie in two fundamental components, both of which are not night-and-day between the sides, but have such a detrimental effect on my enjoyment when the two factors are combined that it ends up just as effective.

For “Down Bad”, I’ll focus on the first, and perhaps most important, reason for my preference of The Anthology: lyrics. Do not get me wrong, the second side has its fair share of strange lines and choices, as with any Taylor album, especially in her current obsessive, wordy over-sharing era, and some of its most befuddling are present on this half, making it stand out even more because of the array of lyrical perspectives that are actually on display. The second side lives up to its name, it allows for further exploration of the narrative perspectives Taylor adopts, the subtler details of decidedly unsubtle songs. I’m not saying that Taylor isn’t writing from her own perspective on all 15 tracks - there are 31 in total, of course, thank the Heavens for arbitrary singles chart rules - because she’s absolutely making parallels to if not directly referencing known moments in her life and career. The approach is adventurous, the charm returns to her clumsiness that was my favourite part of Midnights, and there are moments that can be genuinely biting and, well, poetic.

The standard edition is, for lack of a more accurate term, cringe. Again, there are absolutely moments where that is the case for side B, and I’m not claiming there’s a void of good lines… but there kind of is, isn’t there? We will always gravitate to clunkers, but what I’m more bothered by is the deadpan delivery of these lyrics, that don’t feel very Taylor-esque at times yet don’t establish themselves as a separate perspective. This is exemplified in “Down Bad”, which could be written by anyone outside from some Swiftisms in the verses, which really sound more like derivatives of her prior work rather than a signature style at this point, and really, I don’t need to explain to you why Taylor Swift should not have wriitten a song called “Down Bad”. Musically, this album spends much of its time in dull adult contemporary lightened up by Jack Antonoff synth wank that fails to distinguish the record from what came before it, so when the lyrics don’t feel like Taylor outside of when they’re at their worst, most petulant and bratty, which she fails to consistently sell because of said musical backing, it becomes a slow exhaust of four minutes… this song should really not feel this long. Hopefully now, you’ll understand what I mean in how the two components are mediocre by themselves and fail to constitute a complete package. We’ll talk more about the sonics with…

#3 - “The Tortured Poets Department” - Taylor Swift

Produced by Jack Antonoff and Taylor Swift

Musically, the first side of this album feels uninspired, a retread of steps Taylor’s been tracing alongside Mr. Antonoff for years now, with its most unique textures reminiscent of 90s adult contemporary and soft rock… it could work as utter background music if that weren’t a complete misunderstanding of why Taylor Swift works as a singer, songwriter, musician and cultural presence: an imperfect mess that has achieved unbeatable status not through style or character but through ability to craft a narrative regarding herself and everyone involved, or in some cases, allow others to craft that story for her. Taylor, despite me not enjoying a large amount of her catalogue, admittedly never made it off of bad songs: those came after the good songs, and those bad songs - the “Shake it Off”s, “Bad Blood”s, “ME!”s - were risks, paying off not in acclaim or sometimes even notable chart success, but for developing and evolving the mythos. An unstoppable force - of fans, acclaim, criticism, ex-boyfriends, cultural osmosis and Kanye - has finally made her the immovable object, and it sure sounds like it on this first side of the album, especially compared to the organic, risk-taking and more ambitious, often minimal, instrumentation that Aaron Dessner brings to the second, alongside some work from Antonoff that feels more delicate and refined, unless Taylor really wants to bring the punch in because when she takes a swing, she does it with mesmerising grace. When she misses… the album just kind of sounds like twinkly soft-rock ass.

I’m sorry, this song is fundamentally fine, but it is lost both in its production, a meandering piano jog with no compositional drive, and in its lyrical conceit of megastar Taylor having an affair with some nerd from a band I’ve been a proud hater of for years - check the archives - and mirroring Drake’s inability to explain who the fuck Jason is in “Away from Home”. I know who Lucy and Jack are, do I want to? No, do I dig the farfetched historical comparisons? Kind of, it adds texture lyrically, but it’s also as tacky as saying Charlie Puth should be a bigger artist. He’s big enough. He’s fine. I don’t even think HE wants to be a bigger artist. If it’s sarcasm, then it feels mean and if it’s genuine… maybe you should start listening more closely to the art of your friends - if that’s still accurate here - and fellow musicians that you reference in your music. Maybe there’s something there you haven’t fully grasped in all your security as the biggest artist alive: the ability to truly fail. I’m not sure Lucy Dacus, or Charlie Puth, or even Matty Healy, could survive an album as polarising as this, but once again, that mythos, that fanbase, that tree branch connection to every record and radio executive in the damn Anglosphere and beyond, it’s a comfy king-size bed to sleep on. Is the poet really tortured when they can go through the Hell of showbiz and come back to that? I don’t know, but what I do know is that the song fades out instead of ending properly, you fucking cowards.

#1 - “Fortnight” - Taylor Swift featuring Post Malone

Produced by Jack Antonoff and Taylor Swift

Inevitably, it’s her fourth #1, his second, and it has a well-directed video to wrap it all up. Self-directed, too. There’s a relatively solid foundation of this being about her relationships with Joe Alwyn and you know who. I think there’s a fascinating dichotomy that can be made if you interpret the song in different ways: the breakdown of her relationship with Alwyn, or the closing of the distance between her and bitch-face. I think the wham line of “I love you, it’s ruining my life” develops on one of my favourite songs of Taylor’s, “You’re Losing Me”, even if it doesn’t reach the same heights - or realistically, lows - instead going for a typical Antonoff synth pastiche that frankly disappoints. I think Post Malone’s presence, whilst perhaps underused, is best fit to haunting backing vocals to establish that looming male presence, and he sounds great here. The song largely goes nowhere, planting seeds it refuses to grow, but that’s a problem with the production more than anything. Like “Anti-Hero”, it’s a strong-concept, nuanced lead single that I don’t like primarily because of reasons outside of her control, and I’m just glad to wrap it up in a simpler bow that I can compare to her previous album… because Lord knows that’s what the first side of the album really doesn’t want you to do. Seriously though, this is absolutely lethargic, I can assume this felt like the best way to represent emotional numbness but there are much more unique minimal textures and patterns on the back-half, this feels cheap. Perhaps a good lead single, but terrible opener in my opinion, it really set the tone in a frustrating way. Sabrina Carpenter’s “Espresso” is at #5, Hozier’s “Too Sweet” is at #2. Welcome back to REVIEWING THE CHARTS.

Rundown

So other things happened, more than I expected, actually and to be honest, the intention is to be relatively brief. You know what the notable dropouts are but I’ll say that I cover the UK Top 75 anyway and that they are songs exiting out of the region after five weeks or a peak in the top 40, so we bid adieu to “Supersonic” by Oasis, “so american” by Olivia Rodrigo, “Been Like This” by Meghan Trainor and T-Pain, “Never be Alone” by Becky Hill and Sonny Fodera, “Praise Jah in the Moonlight” by YG Marley with uncredited appearances from Ms. Lauryn Hill, “Houdini” by Dua Lipa, “Water” by Tyla, “Asking” by Sonny Fodera, MK and Clementine Douglas, “Cruel Summer” by Taylor Swift and of course, rest in peace, “Lil Boo Thang” by Paul Russell, and welcome back to “Mr. Brightside” by The Killers. Camila Cabello’s “I LUV IT” featuring Playboi Carti is our other re-entry at #65 which is just funny if anything given this week.

As for our gains, there aren’t a ton, but a surprisingly fair few considering the amount of new entries, so I’ll note down the boosts for “Cry” by Benson Boone to #55, “FE!N” by Travis Scott featuring Playboi Carti at #53 - good week to be whatever species Carti is, I suppose - as well as “Never be Lonely” by Jax Jones and Zoe Wees at #50, “Never Lose Me” by Flo Milli at #49, “We Ain’t Here for Long” by Nathan Dawe at #47, “Back to Black” by the late Amy Winehouse at #43, “Good Luck, Babe!” by Chappell Roan at #21, “Tell Ur Girlfriend” by Lay Bankz at #18 and finally, one I’m very happy to see, the scrunkly Shaboozey at #16 with “A Bar Song (Tipsy)”. I can see top five in this one’s future, but speaking of… oh, wait, we’ve already covered it. Seven new songs! Speed round!

New Entries

#69 - “Joga Bonito” - AJ Tracey

Produced by Remedee and Nyge

The bar for cover art is in Hell. That is a PlayStation 2 model of a flag-wearing Brazilian lady showing leg, and that is now a charting single. It’s no surprise to me that Tracey is hopping on Jersey club-influenced beats, particularly with the mellow, filtered R&B sample and incredibly mundane flexes, as whilst he’s always been fun, and occasionally latches onto excellent hooks, he’s ultimately tied very heavily to trends and guest features, and this just feels a bit… empty, without a real “hook” outside of, well, its hook. He’s chatting the girl up, he says that she would look sexy in his merch, and he has the incredible bar of “I like Japan, so do you”. It must be true love. Look, if I’m going to critique Taylor for lazy writing over empty production, I can’t really give this a free pass either, even if it has some vague energy - none of it feels palpable or driving. ‘tis a shame, I tend to like Tracey’s output more consistently than other UK rappers.

#67 - “Pedro” - Jaxomy, Agatino Romero and Raffaella Carrá

Produced by Jaxomy, Agatino Romero, Steffen Harning and Reinhard Raith

Okay, this one might need some explaining. Raffaela Carrá was, and still is, a beloved icon in Italian pop music, LGBT and women’s culture, and seemingly the entire country. I’m not familiar with her at all, but that’s purely my bad: she’s sold millions upon millions of copies internationally, and released a prolific amount of albums worldwide in multiple languages. A gay icon and self-proclaimed Communist, Carrá’s classic hit “Pedro” never made it to the UK charts from release in 1980 until now, long after her passing in 2021. Latin disco by an Italian Communist sounds like I’d adore it, and for the record, I do. The original song is infectious, silly and brimmed with bombast from its obnoxious horn section to percussion so incredibly layered, especially with the snaps and claps, that it feels almost claustrophobic. Whilst far from a bad singer, Carrá brings a childlike clumsiness to the song’s hooks that define the song’s infectious personality. As someone who’s been introduced to this song literally today, it kind of feels like it’s been here for all of my life and that I’ve heard it at like seven school discos. Sicilian DJ Agatino Romero joined forces with Berlin-based Jaxomy for a pretty faithful remix that may pick up the pace and replace its rhythm section with pounding hardcore kicks, but the horns remain, because how couldn’t they? In fact, they sound even more full of life when placed onto much less organic instrumentation, from being just one element of a cacophony to a disco ball shining in your direction whilst you’re on the worst, most pounding, migraine-inducing high in a rave. It doesn’t change the song structure or even its fundamental instrumental texture a ton, probably out of respect, but that one change to the song’s arguably most important component does a lot to flip it on its head and I can really appreciate how skillfully it’s done here. Rest in peace to Raffaella Carrá, and I really hope this ends up sticking around. It’s just too infectious.

#62 - “Starburster” - Fontaines D.C.

Produced by James Ford

This is Irish indie rock outfit Fontaines D.C. with their new single about accidentally eating the Starburst with the wrapper on. Jokes aside, this is a great song. I’m not particularly invested in Fontaines as I am for some other indie and alt-rock acts that pop up here and there on the charts, in fact, I’m not familiar with their work at all, but it doesn’t mean this can’t stand on its own as one of the leading single for their next record, which I might actually have to listen to if it’s in this vein. I was initially worried given the sprinkle of pianos over lo-fi strings and James Ford production that this would be a late-era Arctic Monkeys rip but as soon as the dejected drums came in alongside that droning lead vocal from frontman Grian Chatten, it became obvious that this would functioning in a hip hop structure through way of indie rock, with Chatten actually rapping, in full Irish accent and all, over the instrumental as if it were a collection of loops instead of a live band with some smoky if typical riffs to back him up. Lyrically, Chatten details several violent analogies that seem to coalesce into sexual desire, or at least some kind of euphoric rush, intended to be purely momentary and necessary, even if it intrudes on others, if there’s a moment of bliss to be found. It’s difficult not to see this as kinky, and I honestly get a lot of mileage out of that interpretation given how its bluntness isn’t relegated to the lyrics, before of course, the strings trickle in for an ethereal bridge about swallowing and following, and Chatten asking for someone to “hit [him] for the day”, before returning to the gnarly mantra of the hook with a sly chuckle. Come on, it’s a sex jam. A weird one, for sure, one wrapped in grotesque metaphor, but I dig this on the smoky, grimed-out level it presents itself as, and maybe I’ll have to listen to whatever comes of this upcoming project.

#58 - “Gata Only” - FloyyMenor and Cris Mj

Produced by Big Cyyu

It’s rare to see Chileans chart anywhere outside of Latin America, let alone the UK, so I do want to give this some more of a chance, especially since the synth-led production at the start is a nice, promising ambiance… that gets immediately washed out by some of the shrillest synths and cheapest reggaeton percussion I’be heard in the genre. I’m not intimately familiar with the scene but I’ve heard plenty with more character, and even reggaeton that’s relaxing and ethereal. That could have been the play for these two auto-crooners, if it wasn’t for… THAT sound they keep repeating. Translating the lyrics, though of course this can lead to miscommunication, we get little of substance to chew on either. The most mush-mouthed appearance here is from Cris Mj, who was criticised by his own fans for his overly-reverbed, robotic performance before other fans convinced him that it was cool, actually, preventing him from deleting the song or at least removing himself from it as promised. I guess it turned out well as this is both acts’ biggest worldwide hit - it’s a massive deal to get a reggaeton song of all genres to cross over to little ol’ England - but if it weren’t for its inexplicable viral success, maybe he had the right idea initially in staying humble and listening to feedback. This is rote and droll in the worst kind of way because it’s in a genre that can be so exciting and weird… yet that stuff wouldn’t dare chart over here so we have these guys. I’m sure they’re nice, talented guys, but this is not compelling in any way. I can weirdly see it growing on me through some kind of subliminal hypnosis… but I don’t see myself revisiting it enough for the brainwashing to have its effect quite yet.

#41 - “Malicious Intentions” - Pozer

Produced by RA Beats

…really? Pozer? Of all possible guys in UK rap to give a second hit, it’s Pozer? The “Kitchen Stove” guy had that much potential? Whilst I have nothing against the guy, and “Kitchen Stove” is completely fine, it’s a viral breakout hit which finds its main appeal in a novel ambient sample flip taking advantage of the Jersey club wave. He does not feel built for another #41 peak, let alone however long this ends up lasting afterwards. Ironically enough, Pozer himself was the most out of place element of that song, and he seems to have understood that. Does that mean he’s changed his flow and delivery to fit a more chill and atmospheric tone? No, not at all. He’s ditched the ambient sample, replacing it with a wave of synth strings that sound pretty triumphant and play off pretty well against incredibly bass-heavy and driven Jersey rhythms less bothered with fancy percussion additions, and more with the sheer intensity of the 808s, slowly and gradually developing into a more traditional drill beat through the eventual addition of enough additional drums, it’s a really cool idea for an instrumental, especially when it reverts to pure numbing intensity for the chorus, and serves well for what Pozer is going for: an incredibly consistent flow delivered much livelier and with a significantly bouncier, funnier grit than before, and bars that really aren’t bad. Pozer also adapts very seamlessly to the changing rhythm of the beat, and his more introspective moments stick out as perhaps surface-level but particularly potent when delivered with the same restlessness as any other bar. Unrelenting feels like a good way to describe the song, always punching and punching a bit beyond its weight and getting reversed back - and that’s the rhythm. Whilst it’s not reinventing the wheel, this is genuinely pretty infectious and difficult to not get excited to, in spite of - or because of - Pozer’s acquired delivery that takes a while to get used to but shares its realm more fairly than you’d think with such great production and a rapper I didn’t think much of until today. Well done, man, this is an unsettling piece of production that is transformed by the confidence of the rapper on it, and for that, I really dig it.

#33 - “Cry No More” - Headie One featuring Stormzy and Tay Keith

Produced by Tay Keith, Pooh Beatz and Tommy Parker

Speaking of promising UK rap, here we have Headie One with yet another single from an upcoming project titled The Last One. Whether this is a full retirement, we can never tell with rappers. But would this be a strong farewell verse? Well, yeah, it’s impeccable for Headie, it feels like a perfect example of what he does well: a cold staccato verse that runs like a train, punctuated by dejected ad-libs and delivery and paranoid, detached bars revolving around gang violence over tight drill percussion and some of the best mixes I’ve heard for a drill beat: it all sounds crisp to me, especially that warping bass. The sample may not be the most interesting melody to go for over this beat, but its sing-songy tone reassures its ability to be both eerie and anthemic, alongside the incredibly clever implementation of Asake’s “Lonely at the Top” - which peaked at #90, though weirdly I did review this one - in Stormzy’s verse. How it doesn’t feel tacky is beyond me, it feels like a genuine shout-out that matches the tone of the song perfectly and leads into the flex in a subtler way than he probably would have done without it. Notably, Stormzy goes for a similar flow to Headie but kind of shelves him in the wordplay and rhyme scheme departments, even if neither are too lyrical here, mostly showcasing a clash between the images they have to maintain and the real people behind them, though some of that may be unintentional given all the flexing that surrounds it, especially in Stormzy’s verse where they’re so well-intertwined. I was expecting to like this, but came back with even more to chew on than I thought I would, so I’m glad that, even if only for that big debut week and a few more, it can land on the chart, this is great stuff. Hyped for whatever forms out of this and “Marvin’s Sofa”, honestly two of Headie’s best singles leading up to this forthcoming record so expectations are high.

#14 - “Push Ups” - Drake

Produced by Boi-1da, Tay Keith, Preme, Fierce, Dramakid and Noel Cadastre

I’m not Kendrick Lamar so who cares what I think about a Drake diss? Genuinely, what purpose would it be for me to sit down and analyse bars that have been thoroughly annotated on Genius already, discussed and taken apart by hip hop podcasters and influencers, if not other rappers, and in some cases, went completely viral? There’s a mix of corny and clever bars here, mostly in the latter which is impressive for late-era Drake, and I hate to say he has some points regarding what seems to be a convenient, preplanned attack on Drake that just confirms his suspicion and contributes to his own narrative. The beat is hard, the mix is rough but it’s a diss track so that is the least of anyone’s concerns. I assume the abrupt beat switch, after a DJ Akademiks meme inserts itself into the song like the leech he is, is a demonstration of Drake having more bars to come, but given there’s only one real punchline in that section, it feels like a long build-up to nothing and a strange decision to include overall as an epilogue. Otherwise, it’s a fun, venomous track with some of Drake’s most well-thought-out and honestly, well-delivered bars in years. It’s crunchy, it’s to the point, and I’m excited for what Kung-Fu Kenny has to say in response.

Conclusion

He’s not getting Best of the Week though. A cool diss doesn’t always equate to a memorable or replayable song, and for me, I think Pozer of all people has the most infectious here, colour me surprised, with the evil-sounding “Malicious Intentions”, but I’ll tie him with the more joyful “Pedro” by Jaxony, Agatino Romero and the late Raffaella Carrá for a more balanced Best of the Week. Hell, there’s enough good stuff here to tie the Honourable Mention up two between Headie One, Stormzy and Tay Keith for “Cry No More” and “Starburster” by Fontaines D.C. As for the worst, it should unsurprisingly fall out quite easily: Taylor Swift has Worst of the Week for “Down Bad”, with the Dishonourable Mention going to “Gata Only” by FloyyMenor and Cris Mj. For what’s on the horizon, I mean, hopefully more good to look forward to but knowing my luck… I don’t know, Bladee? For now, thank you for reading, rest in peace to Mike Pinder, and I’ll see you next week!

#uk singles chart #pop music #song review #taylor swift #the tortured poets department #post malone #drake #push ups #headie one #stormzy #tay keith #raffaella carrà #agatino romero #jaxomy #fontaines d.c.#floyymenor #cris mj #pozer #aj tracey

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deadcactuswalking · 5 months

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REVIEWING THE CHARTS: 04/05/2024 (Taylor Swift, Tommy Richman, Kendrick Lamar's "euphoria")

Just a week after her album’s impact, Taylor’s been dethroned by… Sabrina Carpenter! She grabs her first #1 on the UK Singles Chart with the smash hit “Espresso” and welcome back to REVIEWING THE CHARTS!

content warning: language, Yeat praise

Rundown

As always, let’s start with the notable dropouts, which are songs exiting the UK Top 75 - that’s what I cover - after five weeks in the region or a peak in the top 40. Now this week, we bid adieu to: “The Tortured Poets Department” by Taylor Swift (it got three-song-ruled and dropped out from #3, more on that later), “act II: date @ 8” by 4batz featuring a remix by Drake (not his best week, more on that later), “Von dutch” by Charli XCX, “Kitchen Stove” by Pozer, “Whatever” by Kygo and Ava Max, “Murder on the Dancefloor” by Sophie Ellis-Bextor and FINALLY, “Lovin’ on Me” by Jack Harlow.

As for our gains, we see healthy boosts for “Pedro” by Jaxomy, Agatino Romero and the late Raffaella Carrá at #60, “Outside of Love” by Becky Hill at #54, “Evergreen” by Richy Mitch & the Coal Miners at #46, “The Sound of Silence” by Disturbed at #42 (yeesh), “These Words” by Badger and Natasha Bedingfield at #22, “I Don’t Wanna Wait” by David Guetta and OneRepublic at #20 - I guess obvious covers and remixes have a good week - then finally, a song hitting the top 10 I’m personally very happy with: “A Bar Song (Tipsy)” by Shaboozey at #6. #1 incoming? Please?

We also continue to see the rise or, rather, resurgence of Amy Winehouse’s catalogue due to the biopic, with “Valerie” with Mark Ronson at #38, “Back to Black” at #39, and a re-entry for “Tears Dry on Their Own” at #49, which peaked at #16 when Ye’s “Stronger” was #1 in 2007. On that same album, he says he hates Nazis, look how far we’ve come. Anyways, “Tears Dry” contains a sample of “Ain’t No Mountain High Enough”, made famous by Marvin Gaye and Tammi Terrell, which didn’t chart in its original form for the longest time here. It peaked at #6 in 1970 but only in the form of a cover by Diana Ross, whose version charted whilst Freda Payne’s “Band of Gold” was #1 - just shows that we don’t really remember the bigger hits of the time. The Boys Town Gang reached #46 with their cover in 1981, Whitehouse and Jocelyn Brown both charted with covers coincidentally in August of 1998 - they peaked at #60 and #35 respectively - and finally, the original first charted at #80 in 2013, amazingly still its peak, and briefly re-entered earlier this year. “Tears Dry” itself was sampled the last time Amy made the top 40 in 2023, with Skepta’s #28-peaking tribute “Can’t Play Myself”.

As for our top five this week, we start in the dregs with “i like the way you kiss me” by Artemas at #5, “Beautiful Things” by Benedict Cumberbatch at #4, “Too Sweet” by Hozier at #3, then of course Taylor Swift’s “Fortnight” featuring Post Malone at #2 and “Espresso” at #1. It’s an interesting one today, folks, with a lot of unique and frankly, fantastic stuff to cover, so let’s start with… Kygo?

New Entries

#75 - “For Life” - Kygo and Zak Abel featuring Nile Rodgers

Produced by Kygo, Nile Rodgers, Ollie Green and Franklin

I’m honestly a bit surprised Kygo is still notching chart hits, especially without a big name attached this time. Sure, Nile Rodgers is a legend, but he’s doing so much dance-pop garbage in his later years that I don’t think many people check specifically for his collaborations, so there’s got to be something in this that’s unique, right? Aaaaaaand it’s a sample. It’s a nostalgia bait sample of a 2000s EDM track because of course it is. French house act Modjo debuted with “Lady - Hear Me Tonight”, which spent two weeks at #1 in 2000 and is an absolute classic I still return to today, even if Modjo were basically a one-hit wonder. “Lady” of course is built on a sample of “Soup for One” by Rodgers’ own band CHIC, which comes from a 1982 soundtrack album, never charted and kind of been eclipsed by “Lady”, largely because the original is honestly pretty bad, uninteresting and surprisingly stiff for an 80s funk track, with some of the weakest and most slap-dash implementation of synths. “Lady” really took the best parts of that song - its undeniable guitar melody, that isn’t even put to great use in the original - and constructed an entirely new, incredible song out of it. So I can’t tell if it’s pathetic and desperate for Rodgers to try and reclaim it, or something that speaks to the power of musical transformation. Oh, what am I kidding? It’s Kygo, it’s just kind of boring. It’s a rote piano house track that goes for the same tropical atmosphere Kygo has been doing for years - a lot of the same festival synths are there, it’s all full of bubbly swooshing that actively sound like pastel colours. The only real hook of the song is taken from Modjo and re-sang by Zak Abel, with slight lyric modifications taken from the “I’m Good (Blue)” department of refusing to allow for fun in your dance songs, and even that just feels desperate. What did Nile Rodgers even do here, man? Sign a legal document saying you can use the hook? It’s not even his Goddamn hook.

#69 - “Solo” - Myles Smith

Produced by Peter Fenn

Myles Smith is a singer-songwriter I hadn’t heard of until today but has been active since at least last year and is making at least some consistent buzz so I was interested to see what his first slow-burning chart hit here has to offer and… are we just, IN, 2012, 2013 now? We had festival house with the last song, the next song is heavily Yeezus-inspired, and this is a full-on Aloe Blacc stomp-rock song. It isn’t bad either - I actually had to get used to hearing his richer voice on this kind of scattered clap-stomp-holler folk track, and whilst this is nothing unique given the solemn pianos, spattering of strings and of course, that jingling indie folk rolick, that doesn’t feel particularly organic on this one, it still is far from bad. The lyrics are somewhat generic but not in an awful way, and the “so low”/”solo” double meaning is somewhat clever or at least, would be if in the context of the song, they actually meant separate things. It’s a bit annoying that it’s the main conceit because both have negative connotations for Mr. Smith here, so it just feels like he’s repeating himself rather than elaborating on his feelings or presenting a dichotomy. I imagine it’ll be a lost on a few people due to botched execution, which bothers me because it was an active attempt at clever songwriting that gets kind of lost in sonic translation. This sounds like I’m picking apart the song’s flaws but it is really just a fine little woodlands jams with a great singer, infectious hook and by the end, a damn fine melodramatic string section. I can see it growing on me, especially due to its gorgeous outro, but for right now, I’m somewhat lukewarm, not going to raise a fuss if it ends up smashing though and in a Noah Kahan world, I suppose it’s quite likely.

#64 - “If We Being Real” - Yeat

Produced by Synthetic, Radiate, Fendii, LRBG, Perdu and Dreamr

So terrible news: I like Yeat now. I’m still not granting him his silly little umaluts, and I won’t go too in-depth here, mostly because there’s another song worthy of in-depth analysis, and every piece Yeat’s put out fits into the jigsaw of the album’s narrative as a whole… it would require a lot more time and space, and frankly words, that I’m willing to give #64. No track feels unnecessary on 2093, the atmosphere is consistent across all 24 tracks, and lyrically, it’s a concept album, which I would have never expected from Yeat and he pulls it off brilliantly both sonically and thematically without straining himself to areas he probably couldn’t reach like trying to be super lyrical or stepping away from rage pads. Given the album’s experimentation and length, I wasn’t surprised by the lukewarm commercial reception, but I did at least expect maybe the songs with Future, Wayne or Drake on the deluxe, to have charted by now, when this hasn’t even happened in the US. So when the penultimate track on an album that’s over an hour in its standard issue becomes his first solo hit in the top 75, I have to assume TikTok virality is involved.

Regardless, I’m glad it’s here because it’s brilliant. Sonically as a separate track, it’s one extended verse over a corrupted industrial beat that cracks in right after a mystical intro full of textured but meandering strings, that get swooshed out of existence by a cinematic, malfunctioning clunker incorporating Yeat’s inhuman ad-libs, manipulated behind vocal recognition, into infectious loops within the beat. This is one of few songs - another’s coming later - where I can understand the sheer amount of producers. Lyrically, the title refers to Yeat or more accurately, his psychopathic billionaire character, attempting to shed some of his CEO veneer and ultimately failing, adopting a lot of the violent, power-hungry rhetoric the rest of the album relies on, making it a pretty ironic and depressing title, especially when considering its place in the rest of the album, coming right before the… actually honest and heartbreaking closer, “1093”. In the backhalf of this album, Yeat’s bragging sounds increasingly monotone and routine, and him rapping in and out of distorted filters or going up and down from his traditional murmur to a choking yell, exemplifies how sick and tired he is of the lyfestyle he curated for himself. This song in particular ends with him barely on beat for a beat that doesn’t even really have a beat, becoming a factorial ambiance more so than anything coherently rhythmic. I have no idea why this song in particular is going viral - it doesn’t have a chorus or even really some of the catchier, more potent lyrics on the album, and its beat barely functions as such for the vast majority of the song - Hell, it’s not even one of the album’s integral moments like the opener, “Bought the Earth”, “ILUV”, “Shade”, “Riot & Set it off”, or really countless others, but I’m not complaining because the sound design, the care placed into thematic and narrative consistency, it’s all still here. This is a 10/10 album, and if this song gets more people to check it out, I really can’t be upset with that.

#58 - “Love Me JeJe” - Tems

Produced by Guilty Beatz and Spax

So what’s “Love Me JeJe” actually mean? Well, in Nigerian Pidgin, it means “gentle” or “tender”, and the use of a more regional term rather than the English actually contributes greatly to why I think this song works: Tems’ buttery voice has always been able to display both coldness and a sensual warmth, often at the same time, but on some of the bubbliest guitars I’ve heard over an Afrobeats rhythm since the genre started charting consistently, she’s fully in that second category. Hell, most of the lyrics are pretty basic here, especially the practically meaningless chorus, but that’s to its benefit because thinking too much about this song defeats its purpose: to be gentle. It’s a frankly adorable expression of love and care at its most optimistic extent possible. Despite the clean, tropical percussion, it still feels cute and homegrown. Hell, the second verse, after a nice back-and-forth choir vocal, even references the Nigerian electricity provider that’s apparently nationally infamous for its power outages, with the lyric comparing the love she feels with her partner to the feeling when electricity comes back on in the village and all her neighbours inform the locals. Combine that with how breezy this is, the easy-flowing bridge into an outro full of murmuring, chatter and reverb-drenched laughing, it just makes for a really cute, likeable song. Not necessarily what I expected out of a lead single from Tems, but a delightful surprise. Now to balance that with pure hatred.

#50 - “euphoria” - Kendrick Lamar

Produced by Cardo, Kyuro, Sounwave, Johnny Juliano, Yung Exclusive and Matthew “MTech” Bernard

There’s part of me that finds it quite funny that Drake gets into serious beef with an incredibly analytical and perfectionist rapper like Kendrick right after putting out his own exposé of himself. For All the Dogs is as much of a dissection of Aubrey Drake Graham, albeit perhaps unintentionally, as Kendrick or really anyone could perform, as long as you’re paying attention. It’s been like that (no pun intended) for a while, but his latest is the most obvious and desperate attempt at clinging to status and image that it places his insecurities fully on display. You could recite lyrics from that album on a jazz beat and call it a diss track, so the fact that Kendrick went back to back with damn near dissections of Drake’s paranoia - especially on the Instagram follow-up track he made that is chilling - as well as a myriad of different issues he has with Drake, simply because… well, he doesn’t fuck with Drake. One could argue that this feud is complex and storied, with so many different beligerents… but the motives behind it are genuinely a lot simpler than most rap feuds, and the diss tracks that are made from it are way more straightforward. They just outline the reasons they dislike each other, almost systematically, it’s genuinely refreshing, or at least a lot more than what’s going on with Quavo and Chris Brown, yeesh.

This track in particular is as calculated as can be, acting as a dissertation on why K-Dot doesn’t really like Drake too much. It’s condescending, damn near academic, with its smooth jazz intro and categorical shoot down of each possible avenue you could hit Drake from. We have sextuple entendres on this thing, a total of three beats, two of which are cheap-sounding but absolutely murderous drill bangers, and Genius annotations that rival War and Peace when combined. I’m not a lyrical expert, and there’s so much in here that I didn’t get until I was pointed towards that direction by Genius annotations, Reddit, X, or, embarrassingly, YouTube Shorts. You don’t need to research or analyse for this to hit hard though, there are plenty of lines that aren’t going over anyone’s heads… until you look into the exact way the bars are constructed and suddenly they have 20 double meanings and hidden easter eggs. This is really sheer venom, filled with so many layers that I wouldn’t be surprised if he genuinely wins a GRAMMY for it - and it would be in character considering Drake doesn’t even nominate his songs anymore. It’s already having an effect too, that 4batz album came out today, and he’s not signed to OVO as rumoured. Ye’s on the record… but not the already existing and heavily-streamed Drake remix. Already, he may be losing some of that prestige.

As far as it is sonically, it’s six minutes of murder, and Kendrick’s delivery is energised, violent, damn near deranged at times, to perfectly balance how, somewhat subtly through his meta commentary about his own bars and albums, the lyrics are basically an essay. It has an introduction, a conclusion, a hypothesis, written examples, he even presents counter-arguments and weaves them into his own analysis. By the time he was going extremely in-depth about his experiences as a father, and just repeating that Drake knows nothing about that, it almost felt like overkill. My personal favourite lines and ideas presented here are the concise slow dagger of the intro verse, the “Demun”/”throwaway” scheme, the voice and character he puts on between “Cutthroat business” and “I’ll explain that phrase” - he’s like a disappointed teaching assistant, obviously the YNW Melly line and its set-up, the incredible Daft Punk line that got a cackle out of me on first listen, then followed up by a mocking interpolation of one of Drake’s most revered songs, the straightforward rant about everything he hates that references an iconic moment of DMX’s trademark honesty (rest in peace), the “record” scheme in verse three, and when he started the fake Canadian accent, I just lost it. Drake’s biggest weakness here is that when he’s funny, I’m laughing at him, but when Kendrick’s funny, I’m laughing with him, and much louder. If he does respond, unless the man tells us that Kendrick’s whole life and career has been a farce, or he brings, like, the actual former President Obama on the track or something, I can’t see how it tops this. This is one of the best diss tracks ever in terms of sheer detail, and might honestly be one of the greatest throwaway rap singles period. It’ll be tough to beat.

#31 - “MILLION DOLLAR BABY” - Tommy Richman

Produced by Max Vossberg, Jonah Roy, Mannyvelli, Sparkheem and Kavi

This is the sudden breakout hit for Virginia rapper-turned-singer Tommy Richman, which actually comes in two versions on Spotify, the original and a more distorted “VHS” version. Also, this is brilliant. Sure, Richman just sounds like Brent Faiyaz, but a trend I haven’t been able to talk about on here necessarily but has been very exciting for me is the return of grittier, groovier synth funk and hyphy beats into underground hip hop and R&B, with this representing the more melodic end of that sound, which is typically restricted to Midwest and Dirty South rappers. The sound design on this one is actually even unique to that sound, starting with a bizarrely British-sounding Memphis rap vocal loop which I think isn’t a sample and is just him doing a bad impression, filtered below an infectious beat that actually took me by surprise. It even has cowbells and the type of punchy jabbing drums that I love from classic southern rap, but instead of the smooth-talking rappers you usually expect over this, we get a Brent Faiyaz impression that didn’t click with me until hearing this song. I never really got his appeal until I hear it over this and I start to realise the very distinct new jack swing element to his vocals, as he pretty seamlessly transitions from soulful double-tracked harmonies to much more rhythmic, half-rap flows. Now this ISN’T Brent Faiyaz… and I still don’t really like Brent Faiyaz, but hearing his wannabes I think helped me gather what was distinct about him, and the literal Richman North of Richmond here pitting his filtered splatter of vocal ideas and riffs over the beat in a very Devil-may-care fashion exemplifies the elements I do like about him, just with an instrumental that I personally like a lot more. Also, the VHS version is labelled as such but is really just like a bass-boosted version of the song that sounds like it was done in 10 seconds in Audacity, though the vocal mixing sounds a bit different too. I would love for someone to explain why that was the version I ended up adding to my playlist, because I couldn’t tell you.

#8 - “I Can Do It with a Broken Heart” - Taylor Swift

Produced by Jack Antonoff and Taylor Swift

I know I wrote my whole Taylor spiel last week, but I’m not bothered about this one at all, and I really did expect it to be a fan favourite, mostly because, as the one track I actually enjoy on the standard version, she’s having fun! The lyrics are actively vapid, which doesn’t feel like the intention when she’s singing over soppy adult contemporary but very much feeds into the almost childish character she plays here over synthpop with an actual pulse. The synths here sound like a theme park she’s taking the boy to, especially with the backing vocals and chatter samples implemented into the ambiance and classic Antonoff wonky synths - though some of this doesn’t even sound like it’s in his ballpark. Like were Marian Hill or Sofi Tukker ghost-producing this? Some of these loop choices and flashy sound effects are frankly ridiculous, in the best way of course because the song is camp and fun. Sure, some of Taylor’s lyrics still come off a bit awkward, mostly because of her choice of slower melodies sometimes clashing with the fast-paced patter of the synthscape, but that’s a nitpick. I do love this song, I think it’s fun, Hell, I think it’s funny which is something Taylor has always kind of failed to translate to me in the past, so that is something. I just don’t think we have the same sense of humour. Does she like Norm Macdonald? I don’t feel like she does. Correct me if I’m wrong, Swifties.

Conclusion

It should be incredibly obvious who gets Best of the Week, it’s Kenny, easily, with “euphoria”, and I’m sorry, Swifties, but Yeat better. “If We Being Real” takes away with the Honourable Mention pretty easily as well, though really, strong competition and strong week all around - Tems was close too. There can’t be a Dishonourable Mention in this climate so, Worst of the Week goes to Kygo and Zak Abel for “For Life” that “features” Nile Rodgers, it genuinely just is a lazy template of a song. As for what’s on the horizon, I’m not sure. Dua’ll have some impact, but outside of that, time may have to tell. For now, thank you for reading, long live Cola Boyy, and I’ll see you next week!

#uk singles chart #song review #pop music #kendrick lamar #drake #taylor swift #kygo #zak abel #nile rodgers #yeat #tommy richman #tems #myles smith

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