#Jamie’s shit father

[historicalfictionenthusiast]

If you’re having a bad day I highly recommend picturing Roy Kent kicking the living shit out of James Tartt Sr

[skittishlikefromthewar]

one of the things i love about the show is like.

in s1 he's supposed to save this terrible team from relegation, but oops it's a taller order than anticipated and oops maybe he's not quite okay himself

in s2 he slumps back through the door with his tail between his legs and has to admit yeah maybe he fucked some things because yeah maybe his father damaged him a little more than he wanted to say and okay okay, maybe he's actually got a lot of work to do

in s3 he's putting the work in. he's making changes in himself, he's facing his problems and he's doing so well with it that he.....has a complete emotional breakdown. because hey uh *nervous laughter* what do you do once you start letting go of your maladaptive coping mechanisms?? haha no seriously haha how do you be okay now??? and the man he loves has no idea how to help him and can only try to be present with him while he struggles and tries to figure it all out. and ultimately he has to fucking rally and he's gotta pick his whole self up and tell people thank you and tell people fuck you and make the daily choice to move forward with his life.

now am i talking about jamie or am i talking about ted?

[jopzer]

okay. i have finally finished my rewatch and i think i've finally made sense of my thoughts vis a vis ted and jamie's relationship.

i think it's very interesting that the exact moment ted pulls away from being directly involved in jamie's development is when he realizes that what jamie needs is a father. like in season one and arguably the first half of season two he is very hands on in trying to get jamie to realize his potential/the error of his ways but like. things are noticeably different after he sees him and james through the door, and then after wembley they do not really interact again in a meaningful way until mom city. roy literally picks it up as ted sets it down, like. he can't be what jamie needs he doesn't Want to, he can barely even handle what he feels for henry like we see in mom city, he's not picking up a bonus son you know

i really do think it's a very interesting way to handle their relationship specifically. they're so so intertwined in their character arcs and they're constantly setting each other's off but they can't really meet in the middle because ted can't/won't connect with him on that level. they're a son without a father and a father without a son and they can't click into that relationship because ted pulls away from him the minute it becomes clear that's what jamie needs, and we see it come full circle and see why in his monologue during mom city

[the-casbah-way]

you know it’s bad when i’m unironically getting fucking outfit inspiration from father ted

[issdisgrace]

14TH BIRTHDAY

WARNINGS: SEXUAL ASSAULT, smoking, trauma, nightmares, james tartt is a shit father

Leaning on the balcony, I smoke a cigarette, taping to ashes off over the side. I sigh before taking another drag, lost too much in thought. I don’t notice Roy open the balcony door.

“Y/n.” I just hum in response as I look out into the night. 

“Another nightmare.” He asks. I just nod as he wraps his arm over my hunched shoulders.

“You want to talk about it? Your therapist said it would be good, too.”

“Remember how I told you how James would constantly try to get on my mom’s good side after he cheated or did some shit stuff? Well, it was mine and Jamie’s 14th birthday and James did god knows what and wanted to get back on mom’s good side, so he took us out for our birthday. We did all this stuff, then at the end of the night he took us to sex workers to lose our virginities so we could officially become real men. It was one of the most traumatizing night in my whole life. I couldn’t even look at any women without feeling ill. I couldn’t even look at my own mom. My mom, for christ sakes It took so long to be able to look at or be touched by her without feeling sick. I avoided her at all coast, she gave me space which I’m glad she did but when mine and Jamie’s 15th birthday came around. She mentioned our father was going to take us to see the football game for our birthday instead because she had to work. I woke up feeling absolute dread and before our dad came to pick us up, I ended up having such a bad panic attack that I passed out and I had to go to the hospital. Thats when I first met my psychiatrist, and I was urged to talk to him by my mom. I hated the thought of telling anyone, but eventually I told him everything and we worked together for a year and got me back to the point I could look at and talk with women without being sick to my stomach. That was also the year that me and Jamie started to drift apart. I still think he holds a grudge against me for making us miss our birthday that year. We were supposed to go see you play that year. We were both so excited, but I ruined that. I know I shouldn’t feel guilty after all the years and after mending our relationship, but I can’t help it.”

“I’m so sorry.” Roy says, pulling me into him. I slowly let my guard down and cry into his neck as he rubs my back. We stay like that for god knows how long, but eventually Roy leads me back into the house and to bed. We get into bed and he pulls the covers over us before kissing my forehead and I slowly fall asleep in his arms.

I stare up at the ceiling, running what Y/n told me over and over again. I can’t believe a father would do such a thing to his own fucking son. God, if I could get my fucking hands on that fucker, he would be dead. Calm down, Roy, calm down. No need to be going to jail. You can’t help or protect Y/n if you're in jail.

[oh-surprise-its-me]

Jamie’s aftermath of the mental abuse from his dad needs to be talked about more. 

I’m not sure I can explain how hard it is to deprogram yourself, it’s a shocking process, you learn you are so much worse then you think you are.

You have to live with the knowledge that your father helped make you, no matter how much you don’t want that truth, you have to accept that he is forever part of your dna.

It’s brutal.

Going no contact feels so freeing. Then you get the first text that you know you aren’t going to reply to. The guilt you feel is numbing. It’s crushing. You think about that text for the rest of the day. Fuck week even.

I’m still surprised by the writers that they made the choice to put Jamie’s dad in rehab and had Jamie visit.

Frankly I hate it, the whole show I thought he was a narcissist. No I don’t care that he had a drinking problem, he said and did horrific things to his child. You don’t do that. He is irredeemable in my opinion, Christ, Amsterdam? Like we threw that out the window. Stop redeeming his dad in fics.

The switch back and forth of him being around and fabulous to being around and cruel would have greatly impacted Jamie growing up. He would always want to make him happy, never knowing if the thing that made him happy yesterday will today makes for a minefield of a relationship. It’s exhausting.

You end up expecting every relationship to be that then, and when it’s not? You don’t always know how to react.

It’s hard to get your dad out of your head. I’m sure he’s chanting at Jamie on the field in Jamie’s head. Things your dad says to you in anger stick around, especially when they are said with such force that it makes you shutdown.

—

This isn’t very clear and it’s a bit jumbled but I needed to say it. Thanks for coming to my Ted talk.

[samwpmarleau]

Anyway James Tartt should rot in hell and making Jamie’s ending be forgiving and reuniting with the man who orchestrated his rape at 14, inflicted an additional decade of child abuse on top of it, and has shown no signs whatsoever of even acknowledging that let alone atoning for it is a horror story, not heartwarming

How is this even a discussion

[yutaspierced]

JAMIE KENT DOO DOO DOO DOO DOO DOO~ JAMIE KENT DOO DOO DOO DOO DOO DOO~ JAMIE KENT DOO DOO DOO DOO DOO DOO~ JAMIE KENT

[stonesandswords]

Sorry, yeah. He’s a living piece of shit.

[le-scenariste]

Thinking about the fact there was a time where Jamie didn't have to unlearn and grow away from everything his father's said/done to him.

I'm sure when he realised he could go pro in soccer and was training with a bunch of other talented kids, he probably thought a bit highly of himself. But it's cuz the way his father treated him as a means to show off without caring for his son's feelings that he became the asshole we were introduced to.

I think, if his father hadn't interfered, yeah he'd probably be a bit full of himself but I don't think he would've bullied Nathan and Sam (and ofc his whole team) nearly as much if at all.

Still probably would've been a lil shit tho. (just not to the same degree)

[whatdourelfeyessee]

JASON SUDEIKIS WE NEED TO HAVE A TALK ABOUT THE EMOTIOMS YOU ARE MAKNG ME EMOTE

[solemntitty]

unpopular opinion: i actually like a lot of the desert area in genshit cringepact but that's because i'm a simp for deserts in games

[jopzer]

some of the takes on this webbed site. good lord you people will not be seeing the pearly gates

[starscelly]

the kids on the stars are so interesting bc they’re being raised by 2-3 pretty normal (as much as an nhl player can be) veterans and then also tyler seguin. like yeah they have a normal dad who teaches them responsibility and professionalism and then also like the mom from mean girls.

[zickmonkey]

What if hypothetically for my mom's birthday I bought us a trip to Iceland?

[jvstheworld]

My Ted Lasso Re-watch: S1E10

The Hope That Kills You: Jamie Tartt and his 'dad'

So in my post yesterday I said I wanted to focus on this specifically and that's what I'm doing.

Trigger/Content warning for abuse.

Jamie has suffered abuse from his father since he was a child. Football was the reason he came back into his son's life and his overbearing and controlling ways forced Jamie to be the person he is now. He wanted his dad to stop calling him soft, so he made himself a prick so people would think he is tough. In reality, Jamie was never soft, he was a child, growing up, playing a game that he loved because his mum wanted him to be happy.

In season 1 Jamie is supposed to be 23 years old. His dad showed back up in his life when he showed talent, and used him to brag to people. Because let's face it, James Tartt Snr has not done a damn good thing in his life. His claim to fame is his son. Nothing he has actually done himself, but what Jamie is capable of doing. He didn't show up to support his, we wanted a trophy. He wanted everyone to see him a 'good dad' because Jamie was achieving. And to keep up that appearance, he abused his son. He continued to do so until Jamie fought back in season 2. This time it suck because Jamie had Roy.

For 10+ years, Jamie suffered ridicule, mental, emotional, and physical abuse at the hands of his own father. It caused him to dissociate when he was being yelled at, as we see in this episode and in the episode where Ted shouts at him. While Ted isn't his father and has no intention of hurting him, Jamie's response is to try and protect himself, by shutting down and making himself small. Making himself less of a target. Tartt Snr, in the other hand, wouldn't hesitate to hurt Jamie if it got his point across. In the scene we see in this episode, Jamie already started to dissociate, but Tratt Snr threw the boot to bring Jamie's attention back. But it was very close to hitting Jamie, even if it wasn't his intention. But it doesn't matter if it was his intention or not, he was trying to scare his son into acting a certain way. It's still abuse. And he goes on to shove Jamie's head down, forcefully. It's still abuse.

Now, the thing that people like to discuss is Ted's actions. He saw what went down and left. And Jamie saw that. People like to say that he should have done something to help Jamie. But the what could he have done? Reasonably and honestly, what could Ted have done?

I think people sometimes forget is that if you don't have an exit strategy ready for a victim of abuse, it's not going to help. It will make things worse. Sure, Ted could go in and try to stop what was going on, but Tartt Snr clearly has no problems using violence, and it would get Ted hurt too, because Ted isn't one to fight. And it will then make things worse for Jamie later. When watching the show back, knowing what happens to Coach Beard in 'Beard's Night Out' and he comes across Tartt Snr and his two friends, Beard gets the shit kicked out of him. And he only threw Tartt Snr out of the locker room. For that one small act, Beard got beaten up. You don't think the same or worse could happen to Ted if he walked in?

It's very easy to say, 'Oh, I'd do something if I saw it' but we don't. When we actually see it happen, majority of us freeze up and don't know how to react, because we're in an unfamiliar situation and we don't know how to handle it. We can't say for sure that when Ted was a coach in Kansas that he saw something like this happen. Maybe he did, maybe he didn't. If he did, then he might know not to intervene until a way out was planned. If he didn't, then how would he know what to do? But he did what most people, regretfully, would do. He walked away.

That's the sad fact of the world. When abuse happens, people can't act or won't act to help. Because it's not our place, it's not our business. Ted's reaction was normal. And I think that's what annoys a lot of people. Because when we hear about stories of abuse, we think of what could be done. And it's so much easier to do that when you're on the outside looking in. Hindsight is a wonderful if you don't have to go through this. But when actually faced with it, would you really be able to help?

All I'm saying is that Ted's actions are true to life. We wish, as viewers, for him to do more because he's the good guy. But, he's more realistic than we give him credit for. And in that moment he was.

Luckily, Jamie does get away from his 'dad' and manages to start undoing the damage that was done to him. He starts living and playing football for himself again. To make his mum proud of him. And that's amazing. Jamie deserves to be happy and live free from that abuse. His mum got out and is now happily married to a wonderful man who loves to bake. She found her happiness away from her abusive ex (because I would not put it past Tartt Snr to be abusive towards her while they were together). Jamie needs to find his own version of happiness away from his dad. This time with support from the people around him, which eventually becomes the A.F.C Richmond team, but more importantly Roy and Keeley.

Now, that scene in the last episode, I will have more thoughts about when I get there. Because I will have more thoughts about the locker room scene in season 2 and the 'thank you, fuck you' bit when Jamie talks to Ted in season 3. I will talk about it when I get there. For now, this is all I can say. I have no idea if any of this makes sense to anyone but me, feel free to tell me it doesn't and where abouts, ask me questions, leave comments, all that stuff. But right now, at the time of writing, that's where my head is at. So I'll leave it here.