#Jacob Trübsinn | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

starrz-n-waffl3-fries · 1 month ago

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That was very enthusiastic actually- okay! Ask And you shall receive!!! :333

CW!!! The following text will cover some very heavy topics. Such as domestic abuse, financial struggles, Major depression spirals, Suicide and hospitalization!!

if you are very sure that you want to read this, take a moment to yourself and mentally prepare before anything! Thank you so much, remember that you’re loved and that you’re not alone, and that I’ve been there and I see you<33

Jacob Trübsinn, a dingo that is relatively young. either somewhere in his late 20s or early 30s.

Jacob was raised in Germany in his adolescent years, making most of his fonder memories there! Despite his parents many arguments and the domestic abuse his mother faced. It’s a tough thing to experience secondhand for a child and so this is not me saying that he had a perfectly fine childhood before he moved. He had his problems, they were just more prevalent when they moved to America.

His mother got away from this abusive man via the only way she could really think of at the moment; Fleeing the country by all means necessary.

This was stressful for everyone involved. not only did they not speak English, but they also left in a hurry, so to say that they were underprepared would be a huge understatement.

The mother struggled so much to properly take care of Her son and was doing the best she could for her circumstances. But they were lower middle-class and barely getting by, and that will affect any child long-term or short-term.

Jacob’s mental health declined very quickly, And he quickly realized the impact money has on people and how soul-crushingly important it is. This disturbs him because when you’re a child you are under the impression that money is limitless, that’s why you’re so carefree and happy go lucky- because you don’t understand the weight of anything yet. You’ve never lived through the struggles of what money can do to you if you don’t have enough of it, and/or what it can do to you if you have too much of it.

Because of this he starts feeling hopeless- depression starts developing- he’s unmotivated by so many things because “what’s the point? Was there ever even a point? I don’t need to pretend to be happy just because everyone else is doing it. Fuck off.”

This affected his ability to speak English(given he didn’t see a point in learning it if people were just gonna ignore him and not talk to him anyway), his social health, And honestly, also his physical health, considering he was bed rotting most days-

Once he was able to get out of his mother’s house(it wasn’t too bad of an age, probably 20), he quickly found out that he couldn’t handle being alone as much as he thought he could- his mom was a cushion for him most days and moving into his apartment alone hurt exponentially- he didn’t know how to make friends so that was out of the question, And he didn’t Truly develop much Of a hobby to keep him busy because of how much his mental health declined. Sooo…

The screen cuts to black. He awakes in a hospital bed. Ugh… thought those fucking pills would take me out.. aw well. I’ll be thankful, I mean, if it weren’t for a neighbor next-door hearing my body drop I wouldn’t be here- I wonder why they did that… Guess I’ll go along with whatever they want to do with me after this.

His everything is hazy as fuck due to everything they put in him to keep him alive, And is dealing with the worst nausea ever from the attempt itself.

Every question he was asked by a social worker was given a slurred and half assed response, he wasn’t there enough to be able to translate much in his head and respond in his second language.

All he remembers is his neighbor and mother crying.. He understood why Mom was crying, not the neighbor.

you piece of shit… how could you do that to your own mom? Her life is hard enough as it is why do you have to go and make your problems everyone else’s? Dickhead.

And what is she crying about?? She doesn’t even know me..

None of that mattered though. He ended up staying overnight for two days at the hospital before being Sent to an inpatient facility.

This facility was really stressful in nature. Waking up every hour of the night so that they can check if you’re still alive and breathing so what was the point of even sleeping- there were cameras in the bathrooms-on top of that there were no locks- Every room felt like you were in a baby proofed house and you were the baby. And waking up every day at five in the morning?? Fuck no!!! What are we back at school? Jesus…

Although it was manageable for the most part. I mean, he’s tried killing himself, he’s lived through worse right?

Plus the fact that they were genuinely trying to help him was enough. He’s never gotten that type of support in his life from anyone other than his mother. It was a sweet experience for him, and he was even taught a little bit more English there by some of the nurses!!

After he got back home from being in the hospital for roughly three months, he finally formally meets the neighbor that saved his life. Felicity. Felicity Cinnamon. She was around his age(Maybe a year older, but that’s not saying anything really), And living alone as well. After his attempt she vowed to do everything in her power to make sure he was OK and stable after being hospitalized-

This overwhelmed him a lot, But he was more welcome to it than he ever would’ve been before the impatient therapy, so he leaned into her a little.

I like to think that the story takes place around the time where he’s adjusting to this new new support from her, this strange woman who is—honestly kind of cute—and being very sweet to him. And as the story progresses he rediscoveres old joys from his childhood, Learns a little bit more English, and genuinely continues to make progress with his mental health.

There are ups and downs and relapses- that’s not even mentioning the panic attacks, paranoia, and PTSD flashbacks, but to every journey there are always the high points and the moments that make anyone go “hey… maybe I could stay for a little longer.. life isn’t so bad<3”

And after a lot of healing, Jacob finally asks Felicity out! To which she graciously accepts. And while neither of their lives are perfect, they have each other other. And that’s what really matters, right?<3

why is this character is so important? if you are anyone other than watermelon reading this and don’t know the context of his character-

This character wasn’t originally mine!! he belonged to a departed friend of mine that I would rather not mention, but if you have been following my blog you could probably find easy- and he gave me ownership over this character shortly before we parted ways!!<3

Jacob Needed HELLAAA reworking. When they made Jacob, his defining personality trait was his suicidal ideation and depression.

This INFURIATED me from the get-go. As someone who struggles with both, you do not write a character and just never establish anything other than “haha he wants to kill himself”, or for that matter, make fun of him about it.

However, when they were confronted about it, they decided to rip out the suicide part entirely instead of working with it and being constructive about this major part of a character he made.

Source art🔼

Needless to say, this revamp was well overdue, and I apologize greatly for not working on it right from the get-go. This person has done a lot of shitty things with their characters, but this one by far takes the cake in my opinion and I am very glad to have him in my possession now. He’s going to have a better home going forward, that is a promise.

Thank you for reading everything, and I am more than open to any criticism for his character if you have any, and I will see you later!!!<3

I locked myself in my room and started pacing around and using talk to text until I got a story for Jacob down- it’s long as shit, but if anyone wants to read it, I can gladly post it- with the warnings attached, of course!!! :33

@watermelonolemretaw I remember you asked about Jacob on Sunday and I was like “uhhhhh😭” so I wanted to focus on it today😭✨

#the cruel game of life #oc lore #info dump #oc info #oc info dump #Jacob Trübsinn

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