#Jacen hiding behind Chopper | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

comeyeknights · 2 years ago

Text

Jacen has grown a bit resentful of Ezra Bridger.

It seems like people are always comparing him to both Ezra and his dad, neither of whom he's ever even met. And since the war ended and Sabine threw herself fully into searching for their missing family member, she's been around less and less; expeditions growing both longer and more frequent. Jacen knows he isn't the only one who worries that one day, she won't come back at all.

There's a hole in his family, and Jacen doesn't know what to do about it.

It was only natural that he start looking for someone to blame. And Ezra Bridger, his childhood hero, was the logical target.

After all, he's the one who left, the reason his sister keeps leaving, the reason Zeb wants to laugh and cry at the same time whenever Jacen teams up with Chopper to play a prank, and why Mom is always so sad whenever she sees a Loth-cat or a meiloorun or a million other little things.

Everyone keeps talking about how great it's going to be when Ezra comes home, but it's been over ten years - longer than Jacen's entire life. If he's not back by now, it's because he's either dead or he doesn't want to come home.

Jacen doesn't even want to be a Jedi anymore. All Jedi do is die or disappear and leave gaping holes in their families' lives that never go away. So he's been ignoring those little nudges, his occasional flashes of insight his family has always told him comes from the Force. He shoves them away and refuses to listen. He's going to be a pilot, like his mom. The parent who is there.

And then he'd met Kas the Navigator.

Kas had the Force, like Jacen, but he wasn't a Jedi - he used his powers to fly.

Kas used the Force to guide him through the farthest reaches of the galaxy, fighting the Empire and saving people long after the Rebel Alliance said the war was over, and he taught Jacen how to use the Force like that, too.

He was the coolest person Jacen had ever met. Within twenty-four hours of being rescued Jacen had decided that when he grows up, he wants to be just like Kas.

But it turns out that Kas the Navigator doesn't even exist.

Jacen flies through the common room, ignoring how Din and Cara look up in surprise while Grogu reaches for him in concern.

He can feel the toddler's concern. Because Kas - no, Ezra - had taught him how.

He'd shown Jacen how to break through all those walls he'd put up to keep out the Force, how to open himself up instead. And Jacen had let him, because this wasn't Jedi training, it wasn't going to end with Jacen tearing an even bigger hole into his family - it was Navigating.

But Kas the Navigator doesn't exist. Only Ezra the Jedi.

Jacen drops into the cargo hold and scrambles into a small closet, half-hidden behind a few crates. Curled up between the cleaning supplies, arms wrapped tight around his legs, he lets his head drop to rest on his knees.

It's been more than ten years, he remembers thinking. If he's not back by now, it's because he's either dead or he doesn't want to come home.

Well, Ezra wasn't dead.

Some time later - probably only a few minutes, though it feels longer - quiet footsteps track across the cargo bay, heading unerringly toward his hiding place. A pause, and then a soft knock on the door.

"Hey, kid," Ka--Ezra's low voice calls. "Can I come in?"

Jacen glances around the tiny closet. "Not enough room," he grumbles; but, after a moment of consideration, grudgingly adds, "...but you can open the door, I guess."

The door slides open. Ezra settles against a crate a few feet away, looking out across the cargo bay instead of directly at Jacen. His brow is furrowed, like he's gathering his thoughts.

Jacen wants to be mad at him. He wants to scream and rage and demand to know why Ezra had left the yawning crack in his family to gape and fester when he could have just come home. Why did he stop caring about his family, when not one of them has given up on him for even a single second?

But Ezra Bridger was also Kas the Navigator, and Kas was his friend.

A couple weeks ago, during a quiet watch when everyone else was asleep, K--Ezra had found Jacen looking out at the stars.

"Hmm, those look like heavy thoughts," he'd said, and then asked if sharing them would lighten the load.

Jacen had been wondering if Sabine was out there somewhere, still looking for their missing family member, and whether she even knew he was missing yet.

He'd ended up ranting for several minutes about his missing older brother. When he'd explained his conclusion about why he hadn't come home, K--Ezra had gone very quiet. Eventually, he'd said, so soft Jacen had to strain to hear, "Maybe he doesn't think he's ready yet. Maybe he just needs a push."

(In hindsight, the fact that Kas was actually Ezra Bridger was kind of obvious.)

Just when it looked like Ezra had figured out whatever he was going to say, Jacen cut in.

"What did you mean, when you said, 'he doesn't think he's ready yet'?"

Ezra sighed, long and slow. "It's...kinda complicated."

"Then uncomplicate it!"

And for the next half hour, Ezra did his best to do so.

"You're right, I should have come home sooner," Ezra concludes. "I can't even use the work I've been doing out here as an excuse - I'd probably have been at least ten times as effective if I'd just asked Hera for some backup. I just..." he broke off; the truth was, he hadn't wanted to come home and interrupt all their lives, only to shatter their newfound peace with the news of what Thrawn was up to and then leave, again.

"For what it's worth, I was planning to go see them after I got you home. I was gonna look up Cham Syndulla on Ryloth and ask him where Hera and everyone was."

He risked a glance at Jacen - Jacen Syndulla, Hera and Kanan's son, his baby brother that he didn't even know existed - the kid was deep in thought, his face all scrunched up just the way Hera's always did (how had he never realized who Jacen was? The signs were so obvious, now that he knew to look for them), but he'd uncurled some from that tight ball Ezra had found him in.

"Everyone misses you," he said finally, accusingly. "A lot. Like there's a hole in their hearts where you're supposed to be."

Ezra closed his eyes. "I know. I'm sorry."

There was a shuffle from the closet, and then a small form tucked himself against Ezra's side.

"They're gonna be really happy to have you back."

Ezra wrapped his arm around Jacen's shoulders, tugging him closer. "Me, too. Now, how about we go make something to eat before Sabine decides to cook dinner?"

The face Jacen made told Ezra instantly that Sabine's cooking skills - and her propensity for ultra spicy foods - had not changed in the ten years he'd been gone.

"Yeah," the kid said, jumping up with an almost amusing alacrity, "that's a pretty good idea."

Ezra chuckled as he followed the ten-year-old back up to the galley and common area.

They were only a few days away from the Outer Rim, now. If all went well, he would be reunited with Hera, Zeb, and Kallus within a week; two at the outside.

After ten long, hard years, he was finally going home,

Seeing some speculation on that skeleton crew show they announced back in May has got me thinking about Jacen Syndulla, and the Empire kidnapping Force sensitive kids, and wild space/the unknown regions...and now I'm thinking, wouldn't it be cool if Jacen found Ezra first?

#star wars rebels #kidnapping au #fanfiction

83 notes · View notes

calebdumes · 3 years ago

Note

Kanan Lives AU where he's a nervous wreck during Jacen's birth and the rest of the Ghost family has to talk him down. Bonus for Zeb and Sabine ALSO being nervous wrecks but trying their best to hide it (Ezra is super chill, mostly because he knows fuck all about childbirth). Chopper attempts to murder Kanan for causing the problem in the first place.

I'm sorry this is so short but I hope it's what you wanted!

fandom: star wars rebels

relationship: kanan jarrus/hera syndulla, kanan & ghost crew

rating: g

word count: 763

The smell of bacta was overpowering, filling Kanan's nose with its cloyingly sweet yet unnervingly sharp scent. Hazy memories of heat and burning metal flashed across his mind causing the scars on his back to itch uncomfortably. He ground his teeth against the sensation, leaning heavily on his cane as he paced the length of the waiting room. His emotions were raging a relentless war in his mind, his control slipping with each frenzied step. He should be in there with Hera, not out here waiting. What if something happened? What if something went wrong and he wasn't there to help?

Kanan turned on his heel, a low growl slipping from his lips. His cane echoed off the cold stone walls with an uneven tempo.

“Would you stop that?” Sabine snapped, her irritation a violent flair in the Force.

Kanan tilted his head in her direction. “Stop what?” his voice sounded strained with anxiety to his ears.

“The pacing.” she replied. “It's not going to make this happen any sooner so just...sit down.”

He shrugged her off, unwilling to sit still. If he stopped moving then he would be left thinking and he was already doing too much of that.

“She's got a point there chief.” Zeb's voice was low and even but Kanan could sense his underlying worry. It wasn't nearly as elevated as Kanan's but it pulsed with a sickly light, twisting Kanan's stomach into knots. “There's nothing you can do but wait.”

“I don't see what the big deal is,” came Ezra's voice from behind him. “Hera's just having a baby, what could possibly go wrong?”

Something dense flew past Kanan's head, a wash of cool air brushing across his skin followed by a thump and a grunt of pain from Ezra.

“Ow!” Ezra grumbled. “What was that for?

“She's just having a baby?” Sabine let out a poisonous hiss. “She's just having a baby?”

“Well she is isn't she? It's not like, super serious or anything.”

“You're kidding right? Please tell me you're kidding?”

Chopper, deciding to break his murderous silence jumped into their squabbling with a withering grumble that loosely translated to Hera wouldn’t be in this situation if it wasn’t for Kanan and his inability to keep it in his pants.

His muscles tensed as Chopper rolled closer, the droid’s manipulator arms clicking menacingly. Kanan threw up a Force barrier between him and Chopper, just as a precaution. It wouldn’t be the first time the droid had tried to attack him for getting Hera pregnant and he doubted it would be the last, even after their child was born.

“Kanan,” Zeb said, his voice right next to Kanan's ear, causing him to jump. “You need to sit down or I'm gonna ask that med droid to give you some sedatives.”

“I'm fine.” Kanan grumbled, letting Zeb guide him into a chair. He sat with his shoulders pushed back and his hands tight around his cane.

“Right.” Zeb chuckled. “Sure you are.”

“I should be in there. I should be with Hera.”

“Doc said to wait out here.”

“I know what he said.” Kanan snapped. “It doesn't mean I agree with it. What if something goes wrong?”

“Then the doc will take care of it.” He felt Zeb shrug. “It’s his job.”

The rational part of his brain knew this but the rational part of his brain wasn’t in control at the moment. His worry and anxiety was clouding everything. Until he was by Hera’s side, he didn’t think his rational mind would be calling the shots anytime soon.

“It’s going to be fine.” Sabine said, breaking off from her argument with Ezra.

“Yeah,” Ezra agreed. “Everything is going to be fine. You’ll see.”

“I don't like waiting.” Kanan admitted as he felt a tendril of calm flow from the bond he shared with Ezra, some of his worry dissipating. He gave them all a weak smile, letting his shoulders relax.

Of course that was when the medbay doors swished open and all the emotions contained inside came spilling out. Already struggling with his own metal state, Kanan flinched from the onslaught of pain and suffering from the injured rebels housed inside.

“Master Jarrus?” he heard the doctor say over the flood of emotions sloshing around in his worn mind. Kanan stood, his knees buckling.

“What's wrong,” Kanan breathed, his heart freezing in his chest. “What happened?”

The swirl of darkness that had taken hold of him suddenly dissipated in a wash of golden light with the doctor's response.

"Would you like to meet your son?"

#angualupin #kanera #kanan jarrus #garazeb orrelios #sabine wren #ezra bridger #star wars rebel #swr fan fic #swr fanfic #star wars #shleby writes #shleby promps

75 notes · View notes

canuckianhawkbi · 5 years ago

Text

SW Rebels headcanons for Pride

disclaimer: these are all just fun ideas I had and aren’t meant to be based in ““fact”” (except Kanera and Kalluzeb obvs) this list is mostly the Spectres and a handful of supporting cast. enjoy!

Kanan Jarrus: Spectre 1 is the only straight member of the Ghost crew. he was a Jedi padawan, which had to have been like going to catholic school (romantic attachment, physical or emotional = The Dark Side™) explaining why he immediately went lightsaber-over-heels for Hera

Hera Syndulla: imo bisexuality is the cultural norm on Ryloth, but between Hera’s Rebellion-first workaholic attitude and her “straight-passing” relationship with Kanan, nobody realizes Spectre 2′s lekku swing both ways

C1-10P: Chopper is a droid, but he and AP-5 are obviously a couple. after a young Jacen saw his uncles Zeb and Kallus affectionately cuddling he set up a cute but hilarious ceremony in which Hera not only led Chop down the “aisle” to the Ghost’s cockpit (Jacen himself following behind as ring-bearer) but also officiated bc she’s ship’s captain, and captains can do such things. the droids were Mr. and Mr. Spectre 3 ever after

Zeb Orrelios: Spectre 4 isn’t usually romanic in public, but he’s a big purple fuzzball for Alexsandr, and a damn sappy drunk

Sabine Wren: before she was Spectre 5, Sabine and Ketsu had a very casual, mostly platonic relationship when it was just the two of them on the Shadow Caster day in and day out, saving each other’s lives on multiple jobs; this only made things more complicated when they had their falling out. Ahsoka privately speculates on why Sabine wants to find Ezra so badly, but politely keeps her opinions to herself

Ezra Bridger: Spectre 6 grew up under the Empire’s (homophobic) reign, and was orphaned at a young age, so he’s never had a serious think about his sexual identity. the show makes it obvious he had the hots for Sabine right away, but that sure doesn’t mean he has to be straight. Jai Kell secretly liked Ezra’s long hair, and thought he was pretty

supporting cast beneath the cut!

Alexsandr Kallus: see Zeb. Kallus had to hide his sexuality from the Empire or risk being demoted out of the ISB, so taking on the role of Fulcrum and eventually defecting to the Alliance was very liberating for him

AP-5: see Chopper. their “rings” were made from the casings of a pair of restraining bolts; AP-5 argued that the metaphor was dubious, at best

Ketsu Onyo: see Sabine. Ketsu isn’t very good at expressing her feelings, so she definitely had the “I’m a lesbiab” conversation with Sabine (S: “take your time” K: “GIRLS!”

Captain Rex: the Kaminoans genetically reduced the Fett clones’ sex drives as much as they could without impacting their capacity for aggression; Rex is ace

Ahsoka Tano: it is entirely possible that Ahsoka could be bi canonically. ironically, even though she grew into adulthood without the Jedi, she became less interested in the idea of romance as she got older imo

Fenn Rau: Rau only ever had one partner, and his commitment to the Protectors and Skull Squadron caused a strain on their relationship, especially at the outbreak of the Clone Wars, which ended the relationship. Rau’s romantic history is a closely guarded secret, though he did confide in Rex once when the captain caught his fellow warrior drinking alone on Rau’s former anniversary

Ursa and Alrich Wren: before Ursa married Alrich and officially became matriarch of Clan Wren, she had a handful of favourite servants of various genders at Wren Stronghold. before he met Ursa, Alrich took a liking to a particular male model at art school, but had no idea why (the poor man thinks he’s straight)

Mart Mattin and Jun Sato: Sato is really Mart’s adoptive father, who married his late biological father long after Mart’s mother died. Mart refers to Sato as his “uncle” for fear that the well-known Rebel commander might come under even greater threat from the Empire if the truth got out. Mart is privately jealous of Sabine, mistakenly thinking that she and Ezra are a couple

the first time Cikatro Vizago and Hondo Ohnaka met was at a bar while they were both very intoxicated, and woke up the next morning with no memory of the night before. Hondo doesn’t like labels or commitment, and Vizago thinks he’s straight, so neither of them have ever talked about it since

the only things Grand Admiral Thrawn loves are art and strategy; he much prefers dominating the galaxy to dominating in the bedroom

111 notes · View notes

tigereyes45 · 5 years ago

Conversation

Hera: Alright who put a lock on Choppers legs?

Sabine: Wasn't me. Ezra?

Ezra: I literally just got back! It was probably Zeb!

Zeb: Hey now we all know if I have an issue with the tin can I have other methods of dealing with him.

Hera: And I told YOU that if you used those methods again you would be stuck fixing him.

Jacen: *hiding behind the open door and whispering to Ahsoka* It was me. Chopper stole my blaster, so I made sure he couldn't move anymore.

#Star wars #swr #sw #star wars rebels #zeb #sabine wren #ezra bridger #hera syndulla #jacen syndulla #sabine #hera #ahsoka tano #ahsoka #chopper #C1-10P #c110p

57 notes · View notes

gondalsqueen · 7 years ago

Link

Chapters: 15/17 Fandom: Star Wars: Rebels Rating: Explicit Warnings: Major Character Death Relationships: Kanan Jarrus/Hera Syndulla, Ketsu Onyo/Sabine Wren, Alexsandr Kallus/Garazeb "Zeb" Orrelios Characters: Hera Syndulla, C1-10P | Chopper, Original Characters, Kanan Jarrus, Ezra Bridger, Sabine Wren, Garazeb "Zeb" Orrelios, Alexsandr Kallus, CT-7567 | Rex, Mart Mattin, Wedge Antilles, Ketsu Onyo, Jacen Syndulla, Luke Skywalker, Leia Organa, Ackbar (Star Wars), Lando Calrissian, Jan Dodonna Additional Tags: Pregnancy, vague mentions of abortion, future character death in the background, Season/Series 04, Established Relationship, Oral Sex, Chair Sex, Table Sex, sex during pregnancy, chapter 2 has lots of sex, Secrets, the best pilot in the galaxy, flying combat, character injury, canon torture, flight of the defender, rebel assault, Jedi Night, Major character death - Freeform, Grief, Morning Sickness, Counseling, Masturbation, Dreams, Traditions, Space family, Inappropriate bets, Lothal, Shopping, down time, Space Combat, Battle of Scarif, Rogue One - Freeform, hammerhead corvette!, Yavin 4, Stardust - Freeform, Alderaan, Death Star, labor, Childbirth, domestic life, Lothwolves, Dogfight - Freeform, Hoth, did i mention babies yet?, Babies!, One baby, Work/Life Balance, Advice, Bounty Hunters, Capture, this story has it all apparently, Return of the Jedi, Second Death Star, Existential Anxiety, parenting, Breakups, wine and cheesecake, wine and cheesecake needs its own tag, battle of endor, Battle for Coruscant, forces of destiny: an imperial feast, The New Republic - Freeform

... “LANDO CALRISSIAN?!” “Hera, shh!” “You want to tell me how in the seven hells LANDO CALRISSIAN ended up leading this attack, Gial?”

“You weren’t here.”

“I was coming, and you knew it!”

“And yet.”

“No, don’t feed me that ‘your dedication to the Alliance’ crap, Gial, you of all people—” “—General Syndulla, if you’ll step into the briefing room with me…” She glowered at him. Gial Ackbar nodded his head towards the room—please. “Oh, all right, fine.” Hera sighed in exasperation and let him hold the door for her. Old school Ackbar, still. “Calrissian is NOT leading the attack,” Ackbar told her as soon as the door shut. “Good.” “I am.” Hera considered. “They gave you all the cruisers?” “Yes.” She considered some more. “All right, that’s fair.”

“I’m so very glad you think so,” he told her dryly. “But if you seriously think I’m taking orders from Calrissian—” “If I tell you to, you will.” Karabast. He knew her too well. “Yes, of course I will.”

“Lando Calrissian is leading Gold, Red, Gray, and Green squadrons, and he will spearhead the run on the Death Star’s reactor.”

Hera tried not to feel cheated. Again. “He’s a good pilot, huh?”

“Yes, he is. And he has the Millenium Falcon, which is a good ship. But I want you to look at something, since you missed the briefing.” He dialed up the plans for the half-completed battle station on the table display. “Here is the run.” A dotted blue line. “Here is the target.” A green circle. “Do you see this?” “That shaft is big enough to fit two freighters, side-by-side.” “Yes.” “That target is the size of a corvette.” “Yes.” “So...we get people in there and it’s not hard.” “As you see.” “Hmm.” “We have given you a command, General. In the field, as ever.” “I’m interested.” The blue and green disappeared, and a new green spot lit the entrance to the tunnel. “This is where we begin the run on the Death Star’s reactor. If we can’t get pilots in there and keep them protected once they enter, we can’t complete the mission.” Oh. Hera tried not to grin. “You want me to guard the entrance.” “You and four squadrons. Can you do it?”

She considered. Shooting down TIE fighters was her specialty. It would be difficult not to miss any in a pitched battle, a real challenge, but she could do it. Shooting them down while staying in one area and not getting blown to bits, herself… Now that was a worthy task. “Yeah,” she said. “It’s good.” “We finally get to attack a Death Star.” “I can’t believe they named it the same thing again.” “This from a galactic empire that decided ‘Death Star’ was a good name in the first place.” “Yes, I suppose that puts it into perspective.” “Don’t you have a transport called ‘Phantom 2?’” “Let’s not quibble, Gial.”

...

Hera saw Rex off at the flight deck. “You be careful,” she told him. “Watch out for those kids, and don’t let them do anything dumb.” He hugged her so hard she thought her ribs would crack. “All I have to do is hide behind some trees, General. You keep up the fancy fighting, okay?” “Born for it.” “Yeah.” He grinned, a wry thing. “Me, too.”

Rex boarded the Tydirium and Hera watched, waiting for it to leave. “General Syndulla!” a voice called from behind her. “Hey, Hera!” Lando, of all people. “Calrissian, how did we get so lucky as to end up with you?”

He ignored her tone, as ever. “Eh, you know how it is. I’ve got some good business interests, some good friends…”

“No. Friends, you?”

“I’m as surprised as you are! Speaking of friends—” he clapped her on the shoulder— “I was sorry to hear about Kanan.” Hera blinked. That had been five years ago.Then, putting on his particular brand of smarmy sympathy, he asked her, “How has your sex life recovered?” It was so unexpected, and so Lando, that she burst out laughing. “Classified!” she told him. “And you will never have the clearance.” “Ah, well, a man can dream.”

He’d changed, but not that much. It hadn’t been a pick-up line, though—just a joke to make her feel better, something naughty and unexpected amidst a long list of sincerity and platitudes. The Tydirium’s engines hummed to life and they watched it take off, Lando uncharacteristically silent as it went.

“Your friends are in there?” Hera asked. “They are.” “Mine too.”

…

Space battles typically didn’t last long. One side blew the other up (or EVERYBODY blew up), and then it was done. Endor was the longest combat flight of Hera’s life.

The Alliance fleet jumped into...a LOT of Star Destroyers. And the Death Star itself, looming as large as a moon. She’d forgotten how big those thing were. Get in fast, she thought. Finish this job before they can scramble all of their forces. “All wings, report in,” she called. “Phoenix Squadron, standing by.”

“Orange Squadron, standing by.” “Blue Squadron, standing by.” “Yellow Squadron, standing by.”

“Phoenix and Orange,” she called. “We’re going to beeline for that Death Star. Blue, Yellow, you’re flanking. Keep Imperial fighters off all squadrons and keep us moving.”

“Copy, Phoenix Leader.”

“Commence run.” Even now alarms were sounding in all those Star Destroyers, on-duty pilots donning helmets and climbing into their fighters, the rest scrambling into their gear. They wouldn’t encounter the onslaught of TIEs for a few minutes, though. She muted the comm. “Chop, what do you read on that thing?”

He grumbled a negative.

Hera frowned. “You have NO readings? Not even static from interference?”

Nothing. That didn’t make any sense. “You’re sure you would be able to tell if they were jamming us?” Unless the Empire had invented some completely new method of scrambling signals, he could tell. Unless they... Of course they’d invented a new method. She unmuted the comm, but Lando’s voice was already calling, “Break off the attack! That shield is still up.”

“You heard him!” Hera called. “About face!” She pulled the Ghost up sharp, watching in relief as the fighters behind her followed suit. She muted the comm again. “Great, Chop. Now what?”

Ackbar’s voice, “We have enemy ships in sector 47!” Oh. That was what. “Do we have a plan for getting that shield down, or is this just for fun?” Hera asked. “Han will have that shield down. Fly pretty, Phoenix Leader.” Fly pretty. He had some nerve. But Rex was on the strike team too, after all, and she remembered throwing fighters at a blockade, trusting her own people to take care of the planetary defenses. Okay, Hera. Keep your pilots alive and buy them time to work down there. “All right, you heard him. Engage those TIE fighters. Chase them away from the cruisers. Stick with your wingman and force them to fight two-on-two. Make your skill count.” A chorus of “yes, sirs” sounded over the comm. She knew every one of those voices. “May the Force be with you,” Ackbar said. Oh, it will, Hera thought. Then five TIEs came at her all at once, and she and Mart dove right into the middle of them, rendering them unable to shoot lest they be caught in their own crossfire. Wedge Antilles led Red Squadron by moments after they’d dispatched the group, howling like a krayt dragon and having way too much fun. Hera and Mart waited until the X-wings had passed, then caught the TIES that were chasing them. Some of them, anyway. Several of the remainder peeled off and came after Phoenix Squadron. Skill, not luck, Hera reminded herself. Skill, not luck. Take it slow and wait for your chance. Don’t make stupid mistakes. You’ve got a long time. Outfly them. And then it was nothing but the melding of instinct and analysis that was combat, flying in her zone, keeping an eye all around her, keeping the other eye on the shape of the battle as a whole.

Until the Death Star started blowing things up.

“Get the cruisers out of range!” Hera screamed into the command channel. All the other squadron leaders were saying the same thing, a cacophony of voices. The fighters could avoid fixed beams like that one, but the bigger ships were toast. “Home One, get out of there!”

“Break off the attack.” Even now, Ackbar sounded steady and measured.

“We won’t get another chance,” Lando argued. “Han will have that shield down, we’ve just got to give him more time.”

He was right. Fight now or lose...just like always. “Back the cruisers out of range; the fighters will engage,” she argued. That thing could blow up a planet, huh? Let them get frustrated trying to pick off fighters one by one. Meanwhile, she could bounce TIES off the surface of the big ships for a while.

Lando was thinking the same thing. “Move in as close as you can and engage those Star Destroyers at point-blank range!” Yeah, that would work.

“Hey, Gold Leader,” she said. “You want to stay and dance?” “I knew you couldn’t resist me forever, Phoenix Leader.”

“Yeah, yeah, you keep those delusions. You’re going to need them.” She shot two TIEs out of her way and sped towards the Star Destroyers. “You take the six Destroyers on the left, Gold Leader. We’ll take the six on the right.”

“Phoenix leader, I like your style.”

“I’ve picked up one!” Dek called, panic in his voice. “He’s got a lock on me.” “Serra, get on it!” Serra shot the threatening TIE out of the air without even slowing down. A moment later she caught an ion blast right in the fuel port and exploded before she could even call for help. “Stay alive!” Hera yelled. “Your only job right now is to keep each other alive until the shield goes down!” She flew a tight loop around the Star Destroyer’s communications tower and lost the TIE fighter on her tail when it cut the corner too close and crashed against the dish. Then she and Mart ran straight at each other, picking off the fighters on the other’s tail as they went. He wiggled his s-foils as he made the close pass over her, pilot-speak for “Hi, there.” She laughed, but all this was minutiae. They’d never take out all of the TIEs, and she hadn’t gotten in any good hits on the Destroyers. Then one of Green Squadron went down, crashing into the foredeck of a Venator class ship and sending it right into a Super Star Destroyer. Not the way she wanted to take those things out.

She lost four more in quick succession, good pilots, her pilots. That was enough to spook a team, turn their luck. “You’re doing great,” she told them, voice as soothing as she could make it. “We’re hanging in there.”

Ackbar made the call—Hera and the rest of her team were too busy to notice. “The shield is down. Commence attack on the Death Star’s main reactor.” Oh, thank the Force, she thought. “You heard the Admiral,” she called. “Same plan as before. Blue Squadron, Yellow Squadron, you’re on flank. Keep us steady on the sides. Phoenix, Orange, straight through the middle. Clear out a path for the strike team.” No more playing the long game. Now it was all about speed. “Wedge, 0.7!” she warned. Her voice was beginning to go hoarse. Well, at this point, both speed and stamina. Guess you’re thankful for those double-shift practices now, kids, she thought.

“I’m going in,” Lando called. His copilot added something and Lando translated: “Here goes nothing.” Then the Falcon disappeared breakneck speed into the half-finished maintenance tunnel, two X-wings following it in.

“Close the gap,” Hera yelled. Her people moved in but those blasted TIEs were too FAST, and four of them slipped by before she could get a lock on them. She took out the fifth and sixth without wasting a shot. “Gold Leader, you’ve got four hostiles on your tail!” “You guys taking a nap out there, Phoenix Leader?” “I believe your exact words were, ‘I won’t do anything you wouldn’t do,’ so just take them out!”

This was the hard part, though. They flew a pattern, one squad guarding the entrance while everybody else kept the ships off of them, but the entire Imperial fleet was headed her way now, and Hera could tell the difference between “poor odds” and “impossible.” She was losing people left and right, trying to coordinate whose shields were maintaining and whose were gone.

“Fly really, really fast in there, Gold Leader!”

Wedge was with him. That should help. “We aren’t exactly stopping for caf, Phoenix Leader!”

She moved so quickly the only thing she remembered about this part later was trying not to die. They heard nothing from the team in the reactor for five long minutes—five minutes was a death sentence in combat terms. Then:

“We got it!” Lando’s voice was pitched so high she barely recognized it. “Phoenix Leader, we got it! Get those fighters clear, we’re coming out!”

“You heard the man, go go go go go go go!” She was expecting to lose even more on the way out, but the Imperial pilots must have gotten a clue when the Rebels started running, and it was as if everyone together had agreed to make a break for it.

She didn’t see the explosion, though the light from its blast behind her nearly blinded her and the concussion knocked the Ghost head over heels. Hera went with the roll, using her ion engines to steer away from other ships until she’d ridden the shock wave out. When she looked back, she saw nothing but glowing particles and heard nothing but a collective, triumphant roar that had her wondering if her ears had gone as well as her voice. They’d done it. They’d done it.

She didn’t learn until later that both the Emperor and Vader had died with the Death Star.

…

They worked through fifteen hours, rounding up enemy combatants and patrolling the forest moon before pilots were allowed to take shifts. During that time they acquired a hundred and seven TIE fighters and a Star Destroyer, and Hera began to fantasize about flying one of those TIEs again. Then she came off duty, landing the Ghost just beyond the Ewok village and hitting the comm button before she’d gotten on the ground.

Sabine didn’t answer. She tried a second time and got a touseled-haired version of her friend with lines from the sheet still pressed into her face. “We won we won we did it!” she shouted as soon as the image appeared. Behind her, Chopper beeped a string of expletive-laden excitement.

“What? Hera! Are you okay?”

“Yes! We won!”

“Slow down. I can’t understand you. Are you all right? What do you need?”

Hera took a deep breath. “Is Jace asleep?”

“Yeah.” “Go wake him up.”

“...Okay, but you so owe me.”

Five minutes later Sabine reappeared with a mostly asleep Jacen, who perked up when he saw her. “Hi, Mama! Hi, Chopper!”

“Okay,” Sabine said. “Go ahead.” “We destroyed the Death Star,” she said calmly and slowly.

“YEAH! “Woo!” Jace and Sabine high-fived. “The Emperor and Vader are both gone.” “Gone?” Sabine asked.

Chopper tweeted a distinct ha-ha. “D-E-A-D.”

“Dead,” Jacen translated with a disturbing level of satisfaction.

Sabine clapped her hands over her mouth in delight. “The majority of the Imperial fleet destroyed or appropriated.” A small squeak from behind Sabine’s hands. “There’s still plenty of clean-up to do, but we’re expecting a formal surrender from most of the Moffs within hours. We won, you guys. The whole war. We won.” Jacen whooped. Sabine picked him up and twirled him around, then swung him into her arms and kept spinning. “We won! We won!”

She watched them flip out for a solid two minutes and wondered how much her son was going to learn about fireworks tonight. Then they calmed enough to talk to her and Jace turned an eager face to the holocam. “Mama, can you come home now?”

She winced, but only on the inside. “Not yet, love. We’ve got to finish making things safe.”

“Well, how long is it going to take to make things safe?” “I don’t know, baby. A few weeks? We’re close now.” Not safe—she wasn’t naive enough to think that they’d fixed everything—but this triumph was more than she’d expected to see within her lifetime. She’d take it, and offer it to a four-year-old as a win.

“Hey—” Sabine attempted to distract Jacen, “—your mom just beat the Emperor. You want to help celebrate?”

“Yeah!” Walk it back, Sabine, Hera thought. He’s going to be telling everyone that I beat the Emperor from here on out. In an instant she realized: With the Emperor gone, so was the galaxy-wide ban on Jedi.

“Hey, Hera,” Sabine grinned at her. “We’re going to break the news to Lothal. It’s not classified or anything, is it?”

“Certainly not! They probably already have a report.” “Okay, then. Talk to you in the morning. WE LOVE YOU!” “We love you! I love you, Mama!” Jace chorused, all smiles. She laughed. “I love you guys, too.” “Okay, bye! LOVE YOU BYE!” “Bye, buddy.”

Hera switched off the holo, put her face in her hands and thought, I’m going to do it. I’m going to do it. I’m really going to make a better galaxy for him.

Then the comm beeped again—Han Solo—and Chopper gave her a skeptical whistle.

“Of course I’m going to give him the ration bars. I just want to make him sweat for a while first. Here, watch this.”

…

“A few weeks,” she’d told them. Hera didn’t make it back to Lothal for four months. After Endor they rode on momentum, running through Onderon, Corellia, Duros, supporting dozens of worlds in their own rebellions. Mandalore liberated itself, which had been a long time coming, anyway. Hera provided the air support for Ryloth’s Resistance, wincing in embarrassment as her father demanded to know when she was going to bring that sweet baby to see him again—right as they flew in and strafed the AT-ATs that had his forces pinned down. Then they destroyed the remainder of the Imperial fleet at Akiva. She commed Lothal whenever she could, setting aside extra time on Jacen’s birthday. When he appeared in hologram that day he was distracted, running onto camera still talking at someone over his shoulder. “Say hi to your Mom,” Sabine’s voice advised. “Hi, Mama! I’m having a party.”

“Wow! Right now?” “No, tomorrow, but you should SEE the balloons Sabine’s doing. They have these things on the inside—”

Sabine’s face appeared, cutting Jacen off. “They’re safe,” she explained hastily. Then she gave him the “shh,” look.

“Who is invited to your party?”

“My friends from school.” Jacen had long been in school on Lothal at that point, happy and popular if often in trouble with his teachers. (“Jacen is outgoing and sweet, a good friend to all,” she recited his last report to herself. “He is ahead of his age group in all academic subjects. For next quarter, we will work on listening to his teachers and making good judgments about when to exercise caution.” She could have written it herself.) “They’re all bringing me presents,” he added. Ah, the important part. “Did you get my presents?” Hera asked.

“Yeah, but I liked the tooka game and the Luke Skywalker toy better than the clothes.”

“Fair enough. Luke still your favorite?”

“Ye-eah. Me and my friends, we’re going to play Jedi today, though.” “Lothal is crazy about its Jedi,” Sabine put in quickly. I didn’t tell him anything, her tone meant. “What are you learning in school?” Hera asked.

“I learned grav-ball!” Never anything about history or engineering or math. All games and friends. She didn’t really mind that—it was so different from her own early childhood. “Oh, and I learned a song for my music program. It’s about ‘hey, little lothcat.’” He launched into it and sang the whole thing to her. “I’ll record the performance for you,” Sabine promised.

“Thanks. Hey, Jacen Syndulla,” she said.

“What?” “You are five years old today. What’s your favorite color?”

“Green! Or yellow.” “Fair enough. What’s your favorite food?” “Ice cream with meiloorun sugar sauce on top.” “What’s your favorite thing to do?”

“Watch Battle Droids and play fight with my friends. But we don’t get in trouble, Mama.” “If you say so. What do you want to be when you grow up?”

“A Jedi!” Kriff. Hera took a deep breath and told herself not to worry.

“Or a pilot or a teacher or an artist. Or maybe this guy who has a pet rancor and he goes around eating up bad guys with his rancor. And then he lets kids ride it, but it doesn’t eat them unless they’re mean.”

Whew. That was...somehow a less disturbing answer. What did her level of relief say about her parenting?

Jacen turned again and chattered with somebody off-screen. “Do I need to let you guys go?” Hera asked. “Yeah, I think so, for now,” Sabine told her. “The first cake blew u— Uhm, it didn’t turn out great. We’re going to buy a new one.” “I really will be back soon.”

“He’s happy, Hera. He misses you, and I am pissed off that I’m not in the fight on Mandalore right now, but we’re okay.” “Soon.”

“Jace, come back here and say goodbye to your mom!” “Bye, Mama!”

“Bye, love.”

After his holo disappeared she thought: I am just like my father. Then she put her head down and sobbed in guilt and self-pity. Chopper was rearranging some crates in the cargo bay, and she thought she had the cockpit to herself, so she didn’t pull herself together until she heard footsteps on the ladder. When Rex poked his head through the hatch she was still mopping her face guiltily.

“Hey— hey— General— There’s no cause for that; we’re the conquering heroes.” “I know.” “Today’s Jacen’s birthday, huh?”

She nodded, then burst out crying again in spite of herself. “I’m RUINING him, Rex.” “Hera, I don’t have a clue what you’re talking about.” “I’m not even there. He knows I’m somewhere in danger. I can’t even bother to make his school performance.” “He’s, what? Four? I’m sure there will be other school performances. I doubt his life is ruined.”

But Hera shook her head. If he stayed on Lothal, he was happy and safe in a society that adored him. And without her. When she came back she’d scoop him up and they’d be off to whatever child-unfriendly outpost came next. “I don’t want to do to him what… I don’t want him to grow up to be like me.” “That’s because you’re an idiot, General.”

She wiped the handkerchief across her face angrily. “You unhappy with the galaxy?” he asked.

She shook her head. “Everything you’ve been through? You’re still out here fighting and believing in us, still happy to be alive? We should all grow up to be like you.” “That’s...incredibly nice, Rex, but you don’t really know me.”

“With all due respect, General, maybe YOU don’t really know you.” They took Coruscant the next week with so much support from its citizens that Hera was able to leave and await a new posting.

She returned to Jacen and Sabine as a General of the New Republic.

#hera syndulla #jacen syndulla #battle of endor #fanfiction #next season #foundation

18 notes · View notes

calebdumes · 4 years ago

Text

kanera prompt from @opalknight “Things you said at 18, 28, and 38″

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

fandom: star wars rebels

relationship: kanan jarrus/hera syndulla

rating: n/r

word count: 1.4k

18 Years Old

"I can't do this." Hera said with a groan, rubbing at her temples. From across the holotable, Kanan smiled at her wickedly. She furrowed her brows and looked down, heat blooming across her cheeks. "You're cheating aren't you? There is no way you can win this many times."

Kanan leaned back in his seat, his teal eyes gleaming. "Just admit that I'm the better player."

Hera bit her lip to stop herself from smiling back at him, her stomach swooping pleasantly. Kanan had been a member of her crew for a few months now, proving himself to be more than just an extra hand to help out around the Ghost. He had a tactical driven mind that had saved her life more than once and was always ready to reassure her when the mission seemed hopeless. He was a shameless flirt but Hera was finding that it didn't bother her much. In fact, she was almost afraid to admit that his flirting was starting to make an impact.

Kanan was handsome, there was no question about that, with his blue green eyes that sat beneath his thick brows and amber skin wrapped around lean muscle. But he was funny, and kind, and a bit of a dork and that had Hera's heart leaping in her chest whenever he walked in the room. But there was one thing that was becoming increasingly clear, Kanan Jarrus was a cheat.

He was still looking at her with a cocky grin on his face, waiting for her to make the next move. She glanced down at the board in front of her. There was nowhere left for her to go. Any move she'd make would spell out her doom. So Hera leaned forward and flicked the table off, their game dissolving into nothing.

"Aw c'mon!" He cried as she stood. "I was about to win!"

"You mean you were about to cheat to win." she huffed.

"Honestly Hera I am both hurt and surprised that you would think that of me." He said with mock resentment.

"Then how do you explain winning five games in a row?" She asked, folding her arms across her chest.

Kanan stood, towering over her as he leaned forward with a smirk and said. "I guess I'm just that good."

Hera rolled her eyes and pushed him playfully in the shoulder. "Right and I'm blurrg's daughter."

Kanan captured her hand in his, his thumb stroking over the pulse point on her wrist. "Well then you are the prettiest blurrg that I have ever seen."

He was so close now, his breath ghosting over her flushed cheeks. All she had to do was lean forward just a little bit and she would have him. She wanted to - goddess help her, she wanted to - but she knew that the second she gave in, it would all be over and she wasn't sure she was ready for...whatever this was with Kanan.

So she took a step back, her heart beating furiously in her chest. "I can't." she whispered. Kanan just smiled, giving her wrist a gentle squeeze.

"Well next time you want to try again," he said, those brilliant eyes of his sparkling. "Just let me know."

He let go of her arm and walked out of the lounge. Hera bit her lip and wondered when she would be ready.

28 Years Old

"I can't do this."

She was numb, the world a grey haze before her. Distantly she could hear Chopper beside her, grumbling about something but she couldn't bring herself to care. They were gone. One moment she had them both in her arms and now there was nothing but empty air.

Hera curled up on her bed and stared blankly at the wall. It didn't matter. Nothing mattered.

Ezra was gone.

Kanan was gone.

A tear slipped down her face. Hera closed her eyes.

When she opened them again, Sabine was crouched down next to her, concern written across her young face. Hera wondered when she would lose her too.

"Hera." she said softly. "You need to eat."

"'m not hungry." she mumbled, hiding her face in her sheets. If she could just go away for a little while maybe when she got back, things would be different. They would be here and there wouldn't be a gaping hole in her chest where her heart should be.

"I know you're not but the doctor said you need to." she paused, placing a hand on Hera's shoulder. "For the baby."

Another tear escaped the corner of her eyes.

"I can't." she whispered. "Sabine, I can't do this without him."

Sabine pulled her close, her armor sharp against her arms. She let Sabine hold her as she cried. Tears she had thought had long since dried up came flowing out of her in raw, angry sobs. How could they do this to her? How could they tear this family apart?

How was she supposed to fight without them by her side?

How was she supposed to raise her child without them to help?

How was she supposed to go on living when Ezra was missing?

And Kanan. How was she supposed to breath without Kanan next to her?

Sabine gripped her tightly, rocking her back and forth. "It's okay Hera, it's okay." she whispered. "I've got you. It's okay."

"I can't do this." she cried. "I can't do this without him."

"I know. I know." Sabine's voice was thick. "But we have to."

Hera tightened her hold, desperation lacing her words. "I can't."

"We have to Hera. I know it hurts but we have to." She pulled back, her hands still firm around her arms. "For them. For the baby. We have to keep moving."

Hera nodded mutely, her lekku falling heavy over her shoulders. With a monumental effort she took the bowl Sabine offered her and took a sip. The broth burned down her torn throat and landed heavy in her stomach. She did it again.

Once the bowl was empty, Sabine left with a soft promise to return. Hera watched her go with swollen eyes. She sat there on the bunk resting her hand on the barely there bump of her belly. For just a moment she could feel Kanan's hand on hers. She held the feeling close to her chest.

She couldn't do it. Not right now. But maybe in a little while, she'd find her strength to move on.

38 Years Old

"I can't do this." Hera threw her tool down on ground, wincing at the loud clatter it made as it fell. She sat back against the bulkhead and breathed deeply through her nose, trying to disperse her frustration. It was a beautiful day on Lothal, one of those perfect cloudless evenings that made the endless grassy plains shine like gold. She looked back at the underside of the Ghost's main dashboard and sighed. This just wouldn't be fixed today.

She pushed herself to her feet, her knees popping with the motion. Goddess she was getting too old for this. Following a bright peel of laughter, Hera climbed down the ladder into the hold. Zeb sat at the foot of the ramp, his greying fur glimmering in the bright sun. Out in the little patch of land that sat behind their house she watched as Ezra tossed Jacen in the air without touching him, the Force keeping her son aloft.

"I see Jedi training is going well." she laughed as she sat down next to the Lasat.

"You know Ezra," Zeb chuckled. "Everything's a game to him." he paused looking down at Hera's grease stained hands. "You get the Ghost all fixed up?"

"I can't, not today. I'll have Chopper look at it when he gets back."

"You have any idea what Sabine plans on making?"

Hera groaned. "Not a clue."

Zeb echoed her sentiment before pushing to his feet. "Maybe I'll be too sick to eat tonight." He said as he shuffled back towards the house.

Hera smiled. Her gaze drifted back out to the swaying field where Jacen was listening to Ezra with rapt attention. She saw herself in the dots of green on his skin, the hallows of his cheeks, and the arch of nose but everything else, that was all Kanan. Her heart ached with the familiar echo of grief but she blinked it away.

"You would love this." she whispered softly. "I don't know if you can see it wherever you are but, he's so much like you. They both are."

Off in the distance she heard the familiar whine of Sabine's speeder. She stood and called out, "Ok Master Jedi, training's over! Come inside and wash up for dinner please!"

There was a chorus of groans from behind her as she stood and locked up the Ghost. She couldn't help the smile that pulled at her lips. Some things never changed.

#opalknight #kanera #kanan jarrus #hera syndulla #star wars rebels #star wars: rebels #look at me write #shleby writes #you could always see me

100 notes · View notes

gondalsqueen · 7 years ago

Link

Chapters: 11/? Fandom: Star Wars: Rebels Rating: Explicit Warnings: Major Character Death Relationships: Kanan Jarrus/Hera Syndulla, Ketsu Onyo/Sabine Wren Characters: Hera Syndulla, C1-10P | Chopper, Original Characters, Kanan Jarrus, Ezra Bridger, Sabine Wren, Garazeb "Zeb" Orrelios, Alexsandr Kallus, CT-7567 | Rex, Mart Mattin, Wedge Antilles, Ketsu Onyo, Jacen Syndulla Additional Tags: Pregnancy, vague mentions of abortion, future character death in the background, Season/Series 04, Established Relationship, Oral Sex, Chair Sex, Table Sex, sex during pregnancy, chapter 2 has lots of sex, Secrets, the best pilot in the galaxy, flying combat, character injury, canon torture, flight of the defender, rebel assault, Jedi Night, Major character death - Freeform, Grief, Morning Sickness, Counseling, Masturbation, Dreams, Traditions, Space family, Inappropriate bets, Lothal, Shopping, down time, Space Combat, Battle of Scarif, Rogue One - Freeform, hammerhead corvette!, Yavin 4, Stardust - Freeform, Alderaan, Death Star, labor, Childbirth, domestic life, Lothwolves Summary: It was spring in the northern hemisphere, cascades of purple flowers draping from the trees and a cool breeze against her face and lekku. Strapped to her chest, Jacen slept, lulled by the wind and the walking. Then she was happy in spite of herself, happy just to be in a world that was still alive and getting better. ...

The next two months lasted four months. Or at least they felt like they did. Part of it was the steep learning curve of keeping this tiny, needy thing alive, part of it the fugue from lack of sleep. Mostly it was the fact that she practically never slept in longer than two-hour snatches, so when she stopped to add up her awake time...two months really was more like four months.

“Stay on Lothal,” Rebel Command told her. “Moving bases is mundane. We can do it without the Ghost.” And Hera, who had thought she’d feel guilty about any time away from her post, took the leave and ran with it.

Everybody helped with baby duty. Ketsu, unexpectedly, had the best luck — maybe because she was the only one who didn’t worry about what would happen if Jacen never stopped crying. She just put him on her shoulder and walked and bounced and went on watching her show, one earpiece in place. “She’s frosty,” Sabine said in admiration, but Hera found little overlap between battle skills and baby skills.

Mostly Hera got up with him when he cried, though. There was no point waking someone else to change his diaper when she was just going to have to feed him afterwards. And even from another room his cries made her milk let down. She was raw with lack of sleep and she cried every time he nursed, muffling the sobs and missing Kanan, missing Ezra.

Jacen was a tiny, wild creature during those first few weeks. When she held him in the small hours, limbs scrunched up against her body and eyes buttoned tight, he seemed more like some kind of cub than a person. She ran her hand over his downy hair and said, “It’s okay, good boy. The world won’t always be so strange.” She kissed the little legs that were quickly becoming pudgy. She tried to remember lullabies from her childhood, but drew a blank and had to resort to singing some of Kanan’s drinking songs, instead: “No wind that blew dismayed the crew nor troubled the captain’s mind.” He’d sung it to her every time she’d been grounded with a bad injury or a stomach virus.

Those weeks were hard and boring, but normal in a way she’d never experienced before. They cooked and cleaned and said “oh Force, how is he awake again?” They repaired things and went to the market. She caught up on mission reports and read everything Rebel Command sent her. Nobody planned missions and nobody shot at them. It was just her and her family, going about life and watching too many shows on the holonet.

Hera walked to the market every day so she could see the sunlight and get out of the house. It was spring in the northern hemisphere, cascades of purple flowers draping from the trees and a cool breeze against her face and lekku. Strapped to her chest, Jacen slept, lulled by the wind and the walking. Then she was happy in spite of herself, happy just to be in a world that was still alive and getting better. Soon it would be summer and the Lothali children would be out of school, twisting open the water mains when nobody was looking and playing in the flooded streets like feral lothcats. She didn’t know what came next and often she was so tired that the world around her seemed unreal, but each day she got to walk in the sunshine.

In the early evenings when he’d been fed and changed and soothed but still wouldn’t stop wailing, Hera strapped Jacen down and put him in a landspeeder. Outside the city she could pick up speed and race across Lothal’s grasslands. And as long as she kept moving, he would calm and sleep.

Except for one night. Hera was so tired that she tried to cheat the system and just walk him around the house instead of driving him. Jacen was having none of it. By the time she admitted defeat and put him in the landspeeder he was worked up into full freak-out mode. He’d calmed by the time they hit the city gates, but then he just sat there blowing bubbles to himself and chewing on his fists, eyes wide open.

“Please go to sleep,” she begged. “Come on, aren’t you even a little bit tired?”

He was not, so she kept driving.

The first howl came from far away. Hera saw the creature climb to the top of a distant hill and raise its head towards the full moon. Lothwolf. Beautiful.

The second came disturbingly nearby. The third just to starboard. And then one appeared in front of her, coming into being where nothing had been before, and she was forced to jam on the breaks.

It’s okay, she thought. These are friends.

Two more stalked up on either side of the speeder. They were HUGE friends.

His own personal amusement park ride paused, Jacen started wailing again. One of the wolves nosed towards him. No, no, he was too little and that was TOO close. Hera scrambled to unbuckle him and pick him up. But then the wolves nosed at her, too. Did they think he was some hurt baby animal who needed protecting from her?

“Hush, you big boy,” she soothed. It’s okay, she told herself again. You rode on one of these things. But that was when Ezra had been around to talk to them, and she didn’t exactly have his way with animals.

One of the wolves picked her up by the nape of her shirt and deposited her gently on her feet outside the speeder. Okay, they weren’t behaving like wild creatures. Two more showed up right behind her and she didn’t know it until one of them nudged her in the back. She must have jumped a half meter in the air, but she stood her ground. Jacen stopped wailing and sneezed, then observed in wide-eyed fascination, though the wolves must have been beyond his range of focus.

Then the first one, the wolf that had stopped her speeder, opened its mouth. She put a protective hand over Jacen’s head as those teeth loomed nearer. But it only extended its tongue, bigger than the whole baby, and...licked him? And her entire arm, too — eew. The next one nudged in and licked them as well. And then there was a whole pack, covering them in wolf slobber, breath heavy and warm all around her but not threatening. They were...grooming Jacen, or marking him. It didn’t seem to hurt him, at any rate.

Once each of the wolves had gotten its turn that wail went up from a distant hill again. They turned their heads towards it and loped off without so much as another look at her.

Well, that had been...the second-most bizarre experience she could recall. Jacen, thoroughly slimy and pacified, nuzzled for her breast. “NOW you’re happy?” she asked him.

...

When Jacen was eight weeks old he got his second and last set of inoculations. He ran a mild fever and screamed all night and they all stayed up fretting while Chopper beeped in annoyance: Within expected parameters!!! What was wrong with them, had they all forgotten how to measure temperature? Two days later Rebel Command let her know that they were settled into the new base and ready to begin regular missions again, the message clear. Hera still hadn’t gotten more than a half-night’s sleep since Scarif, her body was far from combat-ready, and Jace wanted to nurse every three hours. But the break was over.

“We’re not really taking this little thing back to base?” Zeb asked.

“He stays with me,” Hera told him.

“That was a great plan when we thought we were taking him to YAVIN, but this is Hoth... “

“The Ghost is heated.”

“You can’t keep him in the Ghost all the time.”

“He stays with me,” Hera repeated every time somebody protested. And that was that.

That evening she found Sabine staring too intently at the xisor chard instead of chopping it. “What’s wrong?”

“I can’t go with you.”

She’d known that was a possibility. Hoth was so remote, and Sabine had duties elsewhere, too.

“It’s not just Lothal,” Sabine told her. “It’s the Mandalorian rebellion and Concord Dawn, and Ketsu won’t join in on a military operation THAT totally, and I need to be...not hiding. Not that you’re hiding. But — ”

“You’re tied to the rest of the galaxy now. I know. That’s not a bad thing.”

“It’s not.” Sabine sounded like she was trying to convince herself.

“We won’t just sit on base all the time. We’ll still run missions and leave the planet. You’ll probably see us again in a few months. That’s not very long.”

“I know, but it’s long in baby time!”

Oh, that was it. Jacen had been almost like Sabine’s own child since the moment he’d been born, and to leave that — Yeah, that was going to hurt. “We’ll comm every night,” she said. “He won’t forget you.”

“Who’s going to watch him when you’re out on a mission?”

“Zeb or Rex or Chopper. We’ll trade off. It’s a series of caves surrounded by solid rock on all sides, Sabine. He’ll be safe.”

Sabine nodded, unresigned, and they made their last dinner on Lothal.

#swr spoilers #hera syndula #jacen syndulla #lothwolves #fanfiction #next season #native

11 notes · View notes