#JOEY BATEY

[endiness]

"Which story by Andrzej Sapkowski do you like the most?" "A Little Sacrifice. This is the first story that made me cry."

[notthiscoolkid]

Fast art inspired by The amazing devil song "Drinking song for the socially anxious". One of my favourites songs that I found this year❤️‍🩹

[thedemonofcat]

When Jaskier's angry or upset, it's always "Don't touch me!" "Get away!" "Hands off!" And then the bard will be gone for hours or days until he calms down.

Now, Geralt understands this kind of reaction. He himself doesn't want to talk to/be around others when he's angry. Much less let anyone touch him. The thing is...Jaskier acting that way never fails to make Geralt feel like shit. Jaskier is usually so affectionate that the sudden cut off is jarring. The first few times it happened, Geralt had been sure that Jaskier was fed up with him and leaving for good.

However, Jaskier always returned. They would make amends, and the bard would resume his touchy, affectionate ways.

One day though, they had their worst argument to date. And although he had always come back before, Geralt was certain that this was the time Jaskier would leave forever. If Jaskier walked out that door, Geralt was sure he would never see him again.

So, unthinkingly, Geralt caught the bard's wrist.

Jaskier's eyes widened, anger replaced with pure panic. "Geralt! Let me go! Let me go right now!"

Geralt loosened his grip reflexively in response to Jaskier's panic. Did the bard think the witcher would force him to stay? He opened his mouth to try to explain.

Only, the world was...spinning. And Geralt's tongue was heavy. And everything was warm. Oh, he felt so very sick.

Then, the world went black.

An unknown amount of time later, Geralt woke. He felt kind of hungover but was otherwise fine. To his relief, Jaskier was sitting at his bedside.

When the bard notices Geralt is awake, he inquires after his health. At Geralt's reassurance that he was fine, Jaskier launched into a tirade about the number of times he had told Geralt "NOT TO TOUCH HIM WHEN HE IS MAD! AND THAT INCLUDES RIGHT NOW, YOU SCARED ME HALF TO DEATH, YOU BASTARD!!!"

Geralt is a bit confused about how Jaskier being mad and his fainting spell were connected.

Two things are revealed that day:

Jaskier is part fae

Some fae become toxic to touch when they are extremely upset or angry or scared. It is a magical trait, so it wears off when Jaskier calms down; nevertheless, it is dangerous.

This puts some things into perspective. Like how Jaskier, who seems to feel entitled to his emotion/reactions no matter how inappropriate they may be, is very skilled at controlling his temper. Or how when he does lose it he chooses verbal slander over physical violence. Or how when there IS a physical fight Jaskier wraps his hands in cloth and tries uses blunt instruments.

Bonus: Geralt tells all of the witchers not to touch Jaskier when he's mad, and Lambert takes that as a challenge.

When a fae is startled enough by touch, it can shatter their Glamour.

That’s exactly what happened when Lambert was goading Jaskier, determined to rile him up, resorting to poking the Bard. But when Lambert finally made a remark about Jaskier’s feelings for Geralt, something inside Jaskier snapped the moment he felt the poke.

A surge of magic erupted, sending Lambert hurtling backward. He crashed against the wall, clearly injured. Everyone turned to stare at Jaskier, who now stood transformed—his fae nature fully revealed. Pointed ears, delicate horns sprouting from his head, and his bright blue eyes glowing even more intensely than before. To top it all off, Jaskier hovered a few feet above the ground, wings unfurled.

Geralt had never seen his Bard look so otherworldly, so undeniably fae. It was both mesmerizing and terrifying. He knew Jaskier hadn’t meant for any of this to happen, but Lambert had pushed him too far.

As the anger faded and Jaskier glanced around, he was met with wide-eyed fear. They looked at him like he was a monster. Overwhelmed, Jaskier shrank himself down with a flicker of magic and flew away, disappearing into the air.

[petew21-blog]

Great Shift stories, Henry and Joey

Paparazzi:"Gentlemen, smile. Look to the right. Yeah. Good"

Henry and Joey were at the front of the hall, where the press conference was about to be held, before the release of the new Witcher season. They were all instructed to suit up and arrive. Henry felt like he was betraying Joey. They were about to announce soon, that he was leaving the Witcher TV series and passing the role to Liam Hemsworth. Henry didn't want to continue playing Geralt if the story wouldn't be more faithful to the books. Unfortunately, Joey already signed his contract and therefore had to play Jaskier for another year without Henry.

They stood next to each other. Joey couldn't pretend that he was happy. He was angry, because Henry didn't tell him soon enough how he felt and that he was leaving, trapping Joey in a job he started to hate. He felt betrayed

Back then nobody knew what happened in the following moments. Maybe it was an accident. Maybe it was intentional. But all they knew was that suddenly all around them was pure chaos. The whole city confused and screaming. Most of the planet swapped bodies with someone standing close to them. Some were very unlucky, in some cases the swap was lethal or caused many people to die. But some people got really lucky. Just like Joey and Henry here

They were obviously both shocked when they found themselves in each other's bodies. But they were interrupted by the people around them screaming and shouting at each other.

Joey in Henry's body:"Henry? Is that you? I'm you!"

Henry in Joey's body:"Is this real? Is it really happening?"

Joey:"I think it is. And I don't think we're the only ones. Maybe we should go somewhere more quiet."

Joey starts walking away, but as soon as Henry moves his body a sharp pain shoots from the back of his body.

Henry:"Ah fuck. Wait. There's something wrong. It feels like..."

Joey started smiling, realising.

Henry didn't find the pain that bad anymore and was slowly figuring out, what it was.

Henry:"Joey? Is that what I think it is?"

Joey:"I don't know what you're talking about"

Henry started laughing at his old face

Henry:"Hahahaha. No you didn't. Holy shit you're naughty, Joey. You really went to a press con with a dildo up your ass? Wow. I never thought that you'd be able to do this."

Joey:"Maybe we should go?"

Henry:"Oh fuck, we are. I really need to take a proper look at that thing stuck inside of me now "

Joey went first and couldn't stop smiling, as he heard Henry struggling to walk properly

But Henry was getting more and more into it. He never had a dildo up his ass. And this one was BIG.

They got into an empty hotel room nearby.

Joey went to the bathroom first to piss and left Henry outside. Henry started throwing his clothes off to the ground. But stopped, once he felt the thing in him move. He got on his knees and felt his own ass trying to push it in and out. An overwhelming feeling caused him to moan out loud and hold ok tightly to the bed sheets.

He heard the bathroom door open

Joey:"You wanna use the bathroom?"

Henry got up and without saying a word went to the bathroom while grabbing his old body's cheeks playfully on the way.

He wanted to look at himself in the mirror, but he needed the dildo to move. He needed to find a better position. But another unwanted movement caused him to collapse into the bath still in his clothes.

He just sat there leaning on the edges of the bath, moving his ass up and down in the air. Causing the dildo to move up and down. He was now covered in sweat. His body was begging to be fucked

Joey:"You need some help with that?" He pointed at his ass

Henry needed to be fucked. And there was a thing much better than the dildo in his ass

He leaned to the front and grabbed his old semi-hard bulge looking seductively into his old eyes

Henry:"Whip it out big boy. You got a hole to patch. And I need it"

Joey:"Are you sure you..."

Henry:"Fuck me right now!!!"

Joey threw off his pants and boxers. Leaving himself in Henry's Grey shirt only

Henry:"I want you to show me how you can be better than that dildo"

Joey:"I'm not really sure about this"

Henry:"Please just fuck me already. I can't take this anymore"

Joey helped Henry to take off his clothes. He turned him around to let him hold the edge of the bath. He then grabbed the base off the dildo and started moving it up and down rythmically. Henry was moaning in pleasure. No, he was screaming

As soon as Joey got hard, he pulled out the dildo and showed his new huge dick into his old ass. Henry couldn't even tell the difference. But now it was warmer, pulsating. And Joey was pounding him.

They were now one. Combined. Sweaty. Joey was deep inside of Henry moving his intestines.

Henry:"Ah ah ah ah. Fuck me... I need you"

Joey couldn't hold it anymore, he pulled out his new dick and shoot the load at his old back.

He was breathing rapidly from the fast tempo. Henry was still holding on. But Joey moved his head to the side and noticed his old dick leaking cum

Joey smiled. Yeah, fuck the betrayal. He's gonna be punishing him for that very often from now own.

Anonymous inbox request:

What about the great shift strikes. And everyone is swapped with the closest person at the moment. A story where henry cavill gets swapped with joey batey before some press con. And henry finds that joey's body has a dildo up his ass and he's so turned up that he begs joey to fuck him.

[daily-celeb-photos]

Joey Batey

[underpreparedbard]

I can’t put into words just how happy it makes me that they brought Joey in to do Sirens Of The Deep

Game Geralt and show Jaskier? Such a DREAM combination

[tielmamon]

hand slipped

[ourstaturestouchtheskies]

A Storm in the Rocky Mountains, Mt. Rosalie – Albert Bierstadt (detail) // Lofoten Island – Lev Lagorio // Rosenlaui – François Diday // Mount Elbrus in the Clouds – Nikolai Yaroshenko // Storm in the Mountains – Hermann Ottomar Herzog // Sierra Nevada – Albert Bierstadt // Rocky Mountain Landscape – Albert Bierstadt // Inkpot Gods – The Amazing Devil

[endiness]

JOEY BATEY in BLOODY CAKES

[angelellipsis-devilofdots]

joey batey did not write "you're not a coward cause you cower; you're brave because they broke you, yet broken, still you breathe" (x) to be known as the toss a coin to your witcher guy

[izzy-hands]

The Adventures of Fun Uncle Jaskier™ and his Pocket-Sized Princess™

[thedemonofcat]

A curse hangs over all Witchers: eventually, they each become the monster of their respective school, forcing another Witcher to track them down and put an end to them. When no one hears from Geralt of Rivia for a long time, two Witchers are sent to find him, assuming he’s succumbed to the curse and transformed into some kind of wolf-like beast.

However, to their surprise, they find Geralt alive and well, living peacefully in a cottage deep in the woods. He hasn’t turned into a monster at all. It is here that the Witchers meet Jaskier, Geralt's husband—the man whose love has kept him human and grounded through it all.

[pandalikeelf]

Joey Batey at the table reading for season 4 of Netflix's The Witcher.

[i-seeaspaceshipinthe-sky]

Geralt is... a hammer. When you're a hammer, every problem is a nail.

The Witcher: 2x04 | 3x02 | 3x03

[ughmerlin]

#he's got his priorities straight

[hannibard]

GERALT AND JASKIER ARE BACK BABY!!!!!!!