#J is for Jingle Bells

[ewebie]

Safety First: Ch 10 - J is for Jingle Bells

Look... I did nothing that I originally planned to for Nano. But I *did* manage something vaguely Christmassy... sort of... We all get some more Safety First - the shorts that have emerged from the Kiss Kiss Bang Bang universe. Who doesn't love the murder husbands?! Thanks to Mousie for a quick and dirty beta.

Safety First: J is for Jingle Bells 

Mycroft grumbled as he stooped to remove his shoes. Snow. There was snow. Which meant cold and slush and rotten visibility. He’d been forced to adjust his plans. He’d been forced closer than he’d wanted and outside, where the flakes had collected on his head and melted down the back of his coat. His hands were cold, his nose was dripping, and he was absolutely chilled to the bone. At least the flat was warm.

[1000feetunder]

The soft chime of bells grows closer, filling the room where Cali currently is as the door slides open.

In comes skipping a jester, black and white striped two-tipped hat bouncing off his shoulders and a ribbon of the same colors wrapped around his waist and trailing behind him.

As soon as he notices Cali, the eyes of his smiling mask land on them and he waves, approaching them.

"Yooo another human sick, me empazaba a aburrir, name's Jingles! What's your name?"

-🎭( @ribbons-n-bells )

Cali had been poking around the halls.

The chime of bells had caught them off guard, and as soon as the door opened behind them their hand was already around the flash beacon in their bag.

They turn to the door, ready to defend themself if needed, but what they see is not what they expected.

They stand up straight, eyebrow cocked.

" You can call me CA....'Jingles'. And . . . why are you dressed as a jester? "

[acaplaya-musings]

Voiceplay Visuals - Mission: Jingle Bells

(This post almost definitely won't be super long, but there was no way I was not gonna make a post for this video!)

Mission Jingle Bells was released on the 22nd of December, 2018, and as you all obviously know, it's a fusion between the Mission Impossible theme music and the song Jingle Bells, and it was legit sponsored by Paramount Pictures! Good for you, VoicePlay! The music was arranged by Layne, but we're not here to talk about that, we're here for the video! (Which was done by both Layne and Eli). So let's get into this!

'Hey you know how we got kidnapped for the Panic Medley videos? What if we got kidnapped again?' 😂

(Seriously, the Panic Medley videos were released just 5 months earlier, in July, and the Queen medley video, where Earl had to take on deities of death to get the chance to live again, was in November! 2018 was A Year)

Also I like that the camera feed says that the date and time is two minutes to midnight on Christmas eve, it's a nice touch.

Get that sponsorship money! Get that exposure! (Also it's kinda funny how VoicePlay has had ties with Disney, Paramount, and Universal! Getting a whole variety of connections there!)

Obligatory "man he looks so good here" 💜

Fun fact: The voice of "Creepy Evil Santa" was actually done by Eli! As for who actually physically portrayed him, I'm not entirely sure. I think I've seen people saying it was Kathy? But I can't remember if they were joking or not

A small thing, but I like how before Villain Santa tells you that the collar things actually control the guys' voices/vocalisations, the video actually kinda shows you! Villain Santa's presses a button on his device panel thing (see previous image), and then Geoff suddenly "kicks into gear", like starts doing exactly what is requested, no hesitation, as if he really is being controlled! It's neat!

(Follow me for more overexplanation of miniscule details /j)

And yes of course I am going to mention the bow in Earl's beard. It's hilarious and adorable, 10/10, no notes

And yes, their hands/wrists are all bound to the chairs with wrapping paper, with bows on top!

(Also I thought Geoff was the only one not wearing a tie but Eli isn't either!)

I am kinda interested to know what the collars were made from actually (there isn't any BTS stuff for this video sadly - I checked)

"What fun it is to ride and sing a-"

"-sleighing song toniiight"

*grabby hands* Gimme the controls, GIVE ME THE CONTROLS! 😂

(Seriously Evil Santa dude, you could've done so much more!!!)

J killed it with the rap part of course! (Who wrote that bit? Was it the same dude who wrote bits for VoicePlay's covers of Superstition and Valhalla Calling?)

Kinda looks like J is giving Layne hope/encouragement/reassurance here and it's kinda sweet!

Geoff! You're not supposed to be enjoying this! ��

(But also his head bobbing is kinda fun/amusing - I guess when he can't sing with his hands like he usually does, moving his head will just have to do!)

Now there's a freeze-frame bonus for sure! 😍

Also just noticed Geoff is moving his fingers a little bit in this part! He cannot be fully stopped! XD

(Also hey are Eli's shoes the same ones that he wore in Creep and In The Air Tonight and maybe one or two other videos? He seems to like black sneakers with thick white soles on them)

When the video started, the time on the camera feed was two minutes before midnight, and two minutes later... it's still two minutes before midnight! What kinda Polar Express time nonsense is this? 😂

"I'm so pleased, you may leave now! Merry Christmas, VoicePlay!"

"Thank you, mister evil... supervillain guy... but can you untie us now? ...Someone's coming to untie us right?"

(Lol rip)

I remember this was one of the videos I watched not too long after I first discovered VoicePlay in 2019, and I'm pretty sure that I wasn't entirely certain who was speaking at the end, but of course now I know it's Geoff! (Though his typical speaking voice nowadays is an octave or so lower, lol)

Okay so not too short of a post after all (3 more images than my post for Baby Its Cold Outside, actually!), and definitely well worth it! But the next post I have in store? Well, there might be a solid chance of me hitting the image limit on that one, lol. See you again soon!

[robo-milky]

…Jurors! Jingle Bells AU…

Rollo and Cloche somehow are always in the same trials together, while everyone else is a different roster of the 21 NRC boys. They constantly clash heads and have differing opinions, so it’s not much of an issue. Rollo being the one person to drag everyone behind, the moment magic is introduced into the equation. Cloche begrudgingly playing diplomat between Rollo and the others for the sake of a unanimous decision…

“Do you have to bring up unlicensed practice of magic, again? I thought we decided that it was irrelevant to the case.”

“A crime is still a crime. Is this not another indicator that the defendant has no regard for the law?”

Why the hell is Mr. Fleur City eligible for Sage Island’s jury? Ummm just a silly AU guys, let’s not think too hard about it

[Edit] PLEASE- IT’D BE SO FUNNY IF SAGE ISLAND’S JURY IS LIKE A SMALL TOWN JURY-

[dnd-shithouse]

I’m gonna say something so evil and controversial!!

If I knew Glenn in real life, I would despise him.

Not because he lets his son smoke pot, or because he is an absent dad or even because he likes Disney world.

I’d hate him because he plays Christmas Rock music.

[tapesandelectronicsclub]

I had a dream where I was celebrating early Christmas with my family. Lizzy, Doll and Rebecca participated along with their Bluetooth speaker they brought.

The three Worker Drone girls said that it's two days before Christmas. Also, they called me a "nerd" just because I'm myopic and wear glasses.

The dream ended with Santa Claus, Uzi, Cyn, maid V and maid J celebrating early Christmas with the song Jingle Bell Rock.

[churrothezanyrabbit]

i don’t care if it’s past christmas

this oopsie hand slip was meant to be

[playvoices]

Christmas time is afoot!

[donutdrawsthings]

I love peeling the skin around my nails. It's like shearing a sheep to me

[cressidagrey]

Recipe for Love - Honey Cakes

Summary:

The Beehive Bakery is out of Peach Cobbler. This leads Azriel to make some very impulsive decisions. 

Warnings:

Definetely NSFW. Maybe don't make life-altering decisions about a lack of Peach Cobbler?

A/N:

thanks to @k-godling for listening to me rambling on about this and finding the perfect name for that Bakery! This will eventually be a series consisting out of One-Shots, so if you have an idea, shoot it my way! (Also, if anybody actually tries out that recipe, let me know lol)

Twice-Baked Honeycakes Ingredients:  1 ¾ cup flour 1 ½ tablespoon baking powder ½ tsp salt ½ cup unsalted butter, room temperature 3 tablespoon butter for greasing muffin pan zest 1 lemon ¼ teaspoon freshly ground nutmeg ¾ cup milk 2 eggs

¾ cup honey 1/4 cup honey for drizzling on top 1 teaspoon vanilla Directions:  Grease the inside of muffin wells. Set Aside. Whisk together flour, baking powder, salt, nutmeg and lemon zest. Knead butter into flour mixture until crumbly. Set Aside. Whisk together milk, eggs, honey, and vanilla. Pour wet into dry ingredients and combine until just combined. Pour batter into Muffin wells. Bake in Hot Oven for 16 minutes or until mostly done but not quite golden enough. Remove from Muffin Wells and place on a baking sheet. Warm the remaining ¼ cup of honey. Brush the tops of the cakes with the honey. Allow to sit for 5 minutes. Bake for an additional 8-10 minutes, or until the cakes are golden brown.

Habits were what got people killed. 

Azriel knew that. 

Getting slow, getting complacent…it was dangerous. 

He couldn’t help himself though. 

Or maybe it was that he thought that if this one thing would kill him…the one thing he did that sparked joy somewhere deep in his chest, that made everything feel not so bad…then it was worth it. 

If Azriel were actually smart, he would have gone straight to the House of Wind that particular day and not even bothered to visit that Bakery. 

Quite frankly, he would thank the mother on his knees for that bit of idiocy for the rest of his life. 

Azriel should have gone home. He was dead on his feet and hadn’t eaten properly in 3 days after the mission in Spring had dragged on and on and on…and now Azriel only wanted food and then his bed and then some sleep…

He had already forced himself to turn in a report to Rhys so that maybe he could actually sleep in the next day…he just hoped that Cassian and Nesta wouldn’t find the energy for one of their early morning trysts. 

But before bed…before sleep…he had promised himself another slice of that peach cobbler days ago. Just one. 

So when he sludged into the bakery…he realised with a grimace that it was late enough in the evening that it would already be closing soon. His hope that there still would be some peach cobbler was left diminished.  

Just one single slice…please. 

Just…

The moment the door closed behind him with a little jingle, there was a soft voice. 

“We’re out.” 

Azriel had grown used to it…to the near bell-like quality of it, all of it belonging to B, that blonde female he had seen the first time. He had gotten used to her , though he had always been served by one of the other people working there, by chance and circumstances. They had never even exchanged a single word. 

But he had liked to watch her…Watch her happiness as she flitted around her bakery. He had figured out that she was the owner quite quickly. 

She was always so…sweet. Sweet to her customers, sweet to her employees…She handed out these little smiles of hers generously and flirted up a storm with seemingly anybody who was willing to stand still long enough. 

She was sunshine personified. 

“What?” Azriel asked dumbly, staring at her, rooted in the spot as B continued counting money at the till, quickly putting coins into tidy little stacks. Seemed like the Bakery was running very well indeed.   

“We’re out of Peach Cobbler,“ she clarified, her voice lilting. “That’s what you always order, isn’t it? Sorry, Peaches.” 

Did she just call him Peaches ?

Did she just call the Spymaster of the Night Court, the horror of Prythian, an Illyrian warrior that was literally nearly twice her size Peaches ?!

Azriel had absolutely no fucking idea what to say to that. 

B looked up, giving him a smile that lit up her whole face as their eyes met across the room. “So what can I get you in…?” The words stuck in her throat. 

Sparkling blue eyes stared up at him. And he could just stare right back because at that very moment… everythingchanged. 

He had never felt anything like this before. 

Had never felt the warmth that burrowed deep into his chest…that sudden unfurling of a golden ribbon…the feeling of being tied to another person so utterly, so thoroughly, so completely. 

It was…

Oh . 

She blinked. Full lips pulling into a smile, that button nose wrinkling. “At least that explains why you come here every week. My peach cobbler is magnificent but clearly not the only reason,” she told him with a saucy little wink and he wanted to laugh, half hysterical. 

Brazen. 

His mate was utterly brazen. 

Something inside him eased.

“It’s quite confident that you think I only came for you,” he said hoarsely and she grinned at him. 

“Well…” she trailed off… ”I think my confidence is inspired,” she teased him, still grinning, her happiness bleeding all over their bond, all over him, and he nearly staggered with it. 

Worry registered on her face. “Sit down before you fall over,” she said pointedly, as she came from behind the counter. He couldn’t help but drink her in even as he managed to sit down on one of her wrought iron chairs, wrestling his wings behind himself.

His stomach growled. 

The sound was so loud in the quiet cafe that he blushed beet red. 

She only laughed, snagging a plate and piled it high with four little cakes that she brought over, putting it in front of him. 

He swallowed.

“If I eat that…” he said hoarsely as she sat down across from him. 

If he ate that, he would accept the mating bond. He would bind himself to her, forever, irrevocably.

“Oh, I know,” she told him with a grin. Not worried in the slightest. It didn’t even seem to cross her mind. She mustered him, blue eyes so gentle. “I am very much aware,” she promised him. “And you are looking at me like you expect me to turn you down, Peaches.”

He was expecting her to turn him down. He was expecting her to take one look at him and the shadows that slithered behind him, currently happily hissing to themselves, Finally, Master! …and to turn around and run . 

“I won’t,” she said with a shrug like it was the easiest promise she had ever given.  “You are my mate. I will never turn you down.” There was fierceness bleeding into her voice at that. “Whatever happens, you’ll always have me on your side.”

A surprising amount of loyalty, right there for his taking. 

His mate was insane. And quite frankly…he loved it. 

“You don’t even know my name,” he gave back hoarsely. 

“It’s not Peaches?” She faux gasped and he couldn’t help but snort. 

“Azriel. My name is Azriel,” he said quietly.

“Azriel,” she repeated, pushing that plate towards him.“Eat. Unless you don’t want to?” She asked him teasingly.

Azriel did want to. He wanted nothing more than that. 

There had been so much in his life that he had wanted and hadn’t been able to get…but she offered herself to him on a silver platter.

And so he picked up one of these little cakes. 

****

It had taken 150 years for him to show up. 

Bee wasn’t quite sure if she should just be grateful about that, or if she should be pissed off that it took that long. She had been waiting for him. 

Of course, she had. 

For somebody that had her whole life made herself a family out of choice… she had waited for fate to at least bring her a mate. 

And for once…for once she had been right. 

He was right there. Right there in the Beehive. Right there in her home. 

Granted, he stood out like a sore thumb with these beautiful, ferocious wings that stretched over his back…and the violent black leather armour he wore, blue stones gleaming. 

But all of that stood in sharp contrast to the rest of his demeanour, which looked like he was fully expecting her to turn him down. 

Jokes on him, she had no plans to do that. 

He was hers . She would never turn him down. 

Also, he was far too pretty for her to ever even consider it…She had really hit the jackpot with that. 

(And maybe the fact that she had been harbouring a secret crush on peaches for weeks and he was the only reason why the peach cobbler had been a daily staple in the Beehive also had something to do with that…)

“Better?” she asked him curiously as he scarfed down the second cake, stealing one of them for herself. “Honey cakes,” Bee told him brightly. “My sister brought me some lavender honey yesterday so I made them.” Roisin had gotten it from a friend herself, and Bee thought that it was quite a successful pairing. 

Her Honey Cakes had never tasted better. 

“Yes,” he breathed out, and he looked into his eyes to find the pupils blown wide, his want and need sharply grating against that new, golden bond tying them together. 

“Do you proposition every male that walks into your bakery and orders Peach Cobbler?” he asked her, his voice hoarse and she couldn’t help but grin, as she offered him her hand, as she stood. 

He took it, dwarfing hers with his own, violently scarred…but oh so gently. So gently. 

The first touch was like a spark…like a wildfire roared to life in her blood. She couldn’t help the goosebumps that rose over her skin. 

“Only the ones that are as handsome as you,” she quipped back, her voice shaky, as she wrapped her fingers around his. “Let’s go upstairs.”

“Upstairs,” he agreed and followed behind her as she quickly grabbed the till…remembering that at least. 

Though it was thrown carelessly on the table in her hallway as she turned as soon as she could close the door and lock it behind her. 

He still stood there, staring at her…and she half expected him to pounce…because he looked like a cat like that, watching her every move. 

But he didn’t move. Didn’t move. Didn’t do anything but watch her, his mouth slightly open, his chest rising and flaking with every sharp breath he took. 

Oh well… she could take the lead…She would gladly do that. 

So she stepped closer to him…breathing in his scent…cedars and something she couldn’t quite place…wintry…like a forest in the morning…He smelled so good . 

She wanted to roll around his scent. Bee wanted…

Instead, she reached out with the hand he wasn’t holding, carefully, slowly…lifting it up to his face. 

She touched Azriel’s cheek and he turned into her touch, leaning into it, the tightness in his body relaxing as she cupped his cheek…

And then she stood up on her tiptoes and failed horribly to even reach higher than the middle of his chest, making him laugh, his body shaking with mirth. She growled as she yanked him down and he went willingly, finally letting her crush her lips to his. 

And then…oh. 

It was like coming home. It was like falling asleep and waking up at the same moment…it was like…like everything inside her calmed and burst into flames…

And…by the cauldron, she needed him.

That must be that damn mating frenzy everybody always talked about. 

His tongue hungrily licked into her mouth and she gave as good as she got from him, her hands curling tightly into the leather armour he wore. 

 “I don’t even know your name,” he growled against her mouth and she couldn’t help but laugh. 

“Beatrice. Everybody calls me Bee. Like the animal, not like the letter,” she answered with a moan, even as she walked backwards, until he had enough and just scooped her up like she weighed nothing…she couldn’t help but squeak, because she may wasn’t particularly tall, but she was rather… substantial and he didn’t even seem to notice her weight. 

Oh well. she wasn’t going to start complaining. 

Not when he managed to find her bedroom on the first try and Bee hit the bed as he followed her down. 

She caught his mouth with hers again, hungrily licking into his mouth, grounding up against him…the bulk of him pressed her down into the bed…muscular and massive. 

There seemed to be nothing soft about his body at all, was there? 

She managed to get a hand on the buckles that kept Azriel’s jacket closed and then pulled back with a regretful because she was quite sure that that was never going to work. 

“Get it off,” she managed to bring out. “Before I try and rip it off.” His eyes darkened at that but he lifted off her and she leaned up on her elbows to watch him…watch him unbutton the jackets and open the buckles so that he could slide it off his body…these beautiful dark wings, unfurling behind him…the swirling tattoos that covered his chest and arms…

Bee had been right. There wasn’t an ounce of fat on him anywhere, the muscles standing out sharply, speaking of…years of hard work and training. Azriel was gorgeous. 

She was a lucky, lucky girl. 

With maybe just a teeny, tiny bit of self-consciousness because he looked like that and she…didn’t. 

Though the way he was watching her…hazel green eyes dark…desire so plainly on his face…his tongue slipping over his lips…

It made her sit up and open the bow that kept her apron closed…let her shrug it off and throw it to the floor…Something to deal with tomorrow. 

Somehow that pulled him into action…made him lean down so that he could kiss her again, and Bee smiled into that kiss, moaning softly as his tongue plundered her mouth. 

She wasn’t sure what she had expected, but somehow she had thought he would be…rougher. 

He wasn’t. If anything, he was endlessly gentle…

Azriel caught her ankle without a word, obligingly unbuckling her shoe and dropping it to the floor. He slid one hand up her leg briefly, all the way to the knee, Bee unable to stop the goosebumps that broke out all over her body, the soft shiver that rocked her. 

“Cold?” he asked her, his voice quiet but she shook her head, even as she offered her other foot, letting him take off the other shoes and toss it over his shoulder,

“You could keep me warm?” she offered breathlessly, making him laugh, the sound warm and rich like molasses, before he crawled to join her on the bed. 

 Her breath hitched as he crawled over her and settled between the spread of her thighs…Kissing her again…She was so busy with curling a hand in his hair that she didn’t even notice him starting to unbutton her dress until he reached her waist and then growled in annoyance. 

This time it was her laughing, struggling to sit up underneath him so that she could shrug out of the rest of her clothing…could pull the dress over her head and slip out of the lacy little unmentionable she wore, because she was quite sure she would rip them apart in her hurry to lose them later anyway…and the way he stared at her body as she bared more and more skin to him…as she shook out her hair so that the blonde curls fell over her shoulders…

One look over her shoulders and he bore down onto her again, catching her mouth with his with a growl and she hitched her leg higher against his thigh. 

“You’re warm,” she whispered quietly. Azriel was all lean muscles and warm skin…and she arched a little underneath him and shivered. 

He shifted just slightly and her breath caught in her throat…even like this she could feel the rock-hard bulge of him pressing against her through his trousers…making her shiver once again. 

She took the weight of him and moaned against his mouth as he dipped his tongue between her lips.

She whimpered and Azriel lifted his head and slipped off of her to lie on his side. Bee turned with him, seeking his mouth and shivering under his hand as he slid it up her side to cup her breast. 

A long drawn-out moan was the result of that, as rough fingers skilfully brushed over one rosy nipple…

His touch was careful and hesitant…and she met his gaze, pressing against these hands… trying to make it so clear to him that she wanted him…she grasped the golden bond flexing inside her and poured all her want and happiness into it.

He had expected that, his body freezing for just a moment as he dropped his head to her shoulder, holding her like she was made out of spun glass, hands desperately clinging onto her skin. 

Another puzzle piece of him…him, that male that had always been silently brooding in that corner and had expected her to turn him down.

She kissed him, softly, coaxing… and he returned that kiss. It was intoxicating, his patience nothing short of shocking. 

 They got a little lost in those kisses. 

Bee was a little overwhelmed when he wrenched his mouth from hers and slid down enough to take one rigid, aching nipple into his mouth. She couldn’t help the moan that escaped her, the shudder that wrecked her body…

She shuddered when Azriel pushed one big hand between her legs, fingers trailing over her lower lips before dipping between them. 

She was already embarrassingly wet, the scent of her own arousal in the air hard to ignore. 

Bee gasped into his mouth as he dipped one thick finger into her hole, her body shivering with the stretch of it. Everything was big about him, even his hands. His teeth clenched on her nipple briefly and she arched up against his mouth, her back arching.

Azriel lifted his head and their eyes met as he pressed his finger deeper into her, Green meeting blue. Bee’s breath caught in the back of her throat and she lifted her hips upwards against the pleasure with a happy little shiver. 

“Good?” he asked her, his voice hoarse and she just about managed a shaky nod. 

“Perfect, Peaches,” she promised him with a grin and without fanfare he pushed a second finger inside her, making her gasp. 

His thumb found her clit at that moment, drawing a tight little circle about that attention-seeking nub and she couldn’t help the long-drawn-out moan that escaped her. 

“More,” she requested in a whine and he chuckled as he shifted them around, placing her on his lap, Bee the one on top, rising above him, his hands on his hips. 

She growled when she still felt the trousers he wore, managing to shove them out of her way and then…then swallowed when his cock sprung free. Long and thick and…Gods, everything about him was unreasonably pretty, wasn’t it? 

She wanted nothing more than to sink down onto him in one fell swoop. 

It would probably be a bad idea, just because of the sheer size of him. 

But that didn’t stop her from reaching out for him… wrapping one small hand around the hot length of his cock…she watched his face, watched how Azriel hissed in a breath but didn’t try to stop her and flexed his hips as she rubbed the hear of his cock against her entrances. 

Azriel kept a hold of her hips, a thumb still circling her clit, making her half out of her mind with wanting him. 

He makes her take him slowly instead…tiny gentle thrusts that nonetheless make Bee shudder with pleasure, ragged breath escaping her, a whine leaving her throat, her head thrown back…

When she’s finally fully seated, Azriel’s eyes fall shut for a moment in ecstasy, and Bee braced her hands on his chest and shifts a little, just to see how it feels. Cauldron, she was so fucking full.

He let her take her time, not even trying to control her movements…his hands stayed on her hips, still rubbing her clit…He let her rise up on her knees and sink down again in little restless motions, her breasts bouncing…he caught one of them in his mouth again as he sat up, his abdominal muscles flexing in a truly ridiculous display of strength that maybe made her moan wantonly…

Not that she wasn’t already doing it…they were both panting with it, Bee keening with her moans at how fucking good it is, how big he feels inside her, how perfect…until almost by accident she finds exactly the perfect angle to hit that spot inside her, that one spot that makes her see stars…

And she watched as it registered on Azriel’s face and he grinned, slowly lowering his back onto the mattress… tightened his hold on her hips to hold her in place and started to thrust. 

That was the last straw. 

She could feel the bond rushing between them - a little wild and rich with their feelings. The most beautiful thing…

Each drag of his cock inside her pulled her further and further away from herself and into a place, she’d never been. It was more than sex, more than even love. More than anything she had ever felt…

She couldn’t help but wail as it settled inside her…deeper and more pleasurable than anything she’d ever known.

Bee scrabbled against Azriel’s chest, against the swirling dark marks with uncoordinated hands because she had to do something with them…if she didn’t, she wasn’t sure what would happen, as her whole body shook with the strength of the waves of pleasure that crashed over her at that moment. 

Azriel made a positively feral noise and yanked her down, pressing his face into the crook of her neck…breathing in her scent as he clung to her and spilt inside her, hot and filthy and glorious.

She couldn’t help herself as she collapsed, utterly uncoordinated, across Azriel’s chest. For just a moment, he lay still beneath her, shuddering through the aftershocks, his hands still on her hips…his nose pressed against her neck, breathing her in…

He loosened the hands around her hips…she was pretty sure that he had bruised her but she didn’t care one bit. 

Not one bit as he helped shift her until she laid draped over him…and then he wrapped one arm around her waist and combed the fingers of his other hand through her blonde tresses…again and again…so utterly sweet that she melted into his chest, tucking her face again. 

“Thank the cauldron, I didn’t have any peaches anymore,” she mumbled against his chest. For a moment he was quiet. Then he chuckled, the sound warm and soothing. 

“I think I prefer honey now," he answered and she reached out to poke his chest weakly. 

"If you think that's funny, I'll let you know that any bee-related jokes have ceased to be that around 6 decades ago," she told him drily, getting another chuckle from him. 

[cubfan135-facts]

cubfan135 fact #21:

Hermitcraft season 6 featured an unknown individual known only as The Jingler, who conducted a series of pranks on several hermits. Those who fell victim to the Jingler's pranks were often referred to as being "#Jingled". Some pranks included (but are not limited to) vandalizing Grian's map room to say "You have been J-J-Jingled!!!", and leaving a mysterious book in Hermitville with coordinates that merely led to a sign reading, "GG You've been had! #Jingled".

The Jingler's identity was never revealed by the time Season 6 had concluded. Fans and hermits alike speculated their true identity for years. Many fans believed them to be Grian, however it was unlikely as Grian already had two prankster alter egos in Season 6, Poultry Man and The Salmon Ghost. GoodTimesWithScar was revealed to be the Jangler, a different entity entirely with no official ties to the Jingler. Rendog was suspected of being the Jingler for asking his viewers to "jingle that [notification] bell" at the end of his videos. Tango was also suspected of being the Jingler, as his returns to the server coincidentally aligned with the Jingler's pranks.

The most in-depth search for the identity of the jingler on the Hermitcraft server appears to be from Joehills. Upon checking the community mailbox, Joehills discovered a message from the Jingler left in every hermit's mailbox. Deciding that he could not let this devious behavior continue, he set out to follow a trail to reveal their true identity. He initially asks for the help of his viewers to gather intel from other hermit's videos, however this effort would prove fruitless as the Jingler carefully made sure to never reveal themselves on camera. Joe suspects a parrot by the name of Jingles to be behind the pranks, claiming that the parrot works for ConCorp. However, it is possible he was actually thinking of Captain Jack Sparrow, the CEO of ConCorp, and the lead seemed to come to a dead end.

The Jingler's identity was still unknown by the end of season 6, leaving both fans and hermits to speculate on their identity for years. Many began to believe there was no one true Jingler, but the hermits as a collective conducted a multitude of pranks under one common alias.

The Jingler's identity was finally revealed on April 23, 2022 on the Hermitcraft 10-year anniversary livestream. Cub admitted to being the Jingler, notably only after being asked directly by Jevin. Grian in particular was so distraught by the revelation that he joined the discord call from his mobile phone to comment on the situation.

Hermitcraft season 6 began in July of 2018, meaning that the identity of the Jingler was kept a secret for roughly 4 years. It is possible that this is the longest-kept secret in all of Hermitcraft history. The only known "evidence" of Cub being the Jingler is when he is seen during Impulse's Season 6 episode 32 asking if Grian has completed the infinity room. It is likely Cub was inquiring either to see if he could vandalize the map without Grian noticing, or to see Grian's reaction if the prank had already been carried out. Besides this small piece of circumstantial evidence, there was virtually no proof of Cub being the Jingler prior to April 2022. The most concerning detail in this story is, perhaps, the fact that the identity of the Jingler was only revealed when Cub was directly confronted by Jevin on stream. It is unknown if Cub ever planned to reveal the Jingler's identity on his own, and he very well may have intended to take this secret to the grave.

[transmorolians]

you know too much.

if your body has jestrogen (jester estrogen) then you grow clown tits that jingle all the way

[saturnville]

candy bling, joe rantz.

pairing: joe rantz x black fem oc (cleotha jean). content: cleotha jean reminisces on her relationship with joe rantz. warning: more "modern" approach to their relationship. suggestive content. song: candy bling by mariah carey (I suggest you listen as you read). tag list: @neeville @turn-thy-paige @ihe4rtisa @ineedafictionalman @lovebyceleste @alliewassobonum

In the solitude of her room, Cleotha found herself surrounded by fragments of a past she had long tried to forget. She sifted through the contents of a dusty old box, memories flooded her mind with an intensity she hadn't felt in months. Each item she unearthed struck her heart in ways that made her uncomfortable, a relic of a love once consumed by every thought and emotion.

Among the treasures she tried to forbet lay a delicate silver anklet, its tiny bells tinkling softly as Cleotha held it in her hands. Memories of lazy summer days and whispered promises rushed back to her, painting vivid scenes of youthful romance and boundless dreams. 

“What’s this?” Cleotha asked as she was handed a small, velvet bag. Her movements were sluggish as she peeled herself off the pillow she and Joe shared. The soft moan she pushed out was enough to make his insides stir again. 

Joe pulled his arm behind his head and drummed his fingers against his sheet-covered thigh. A small smile pulled on his lips as he shrugged. “Open it.” 

Cleotha held the sheet to her chest and shook the bag. Jingle, jangle. Her eyebrow quipped as she opened the bag and dumped the content in her hand. Two thin gold chains fell out, shining under the gaze of the sun. She hummed in awe as she fingered the chains delicately. “Two bracelets?” 

“Bracelet and anklet,” Joe replied with extra emphasis, a teasing tone underlying in his words. Cleotha, who knew exactly why he bought it, threw her head back in laughter. She muttered, “You’re disgusting.” Still, she held her wrist out for him to place the bracelet on it. 

Joe pulled the sheet back to reveal her brown legs. He readjusted their positions so he was in between her legs, her foot against his bare thigh. Cleotha watched intently as he hooked the gold chain around her ankle. He smiled in pride.

“You like it?” Cleotha asked, rotating her foot in a circle. Joe hummed and palmed her thigh, hooking her leg around his waist. He brought his lips to hers, nipping and sucking at the plushness there. Then, he made his way back down, pecking at her collarbone down to her calf once more, placing her leg over his shoulder.

“I do. I’ll like it even more in a second. Lay back.”

He made her feel so beautiful that day, glistening like jewels beneath the sunlight. Next to it, a necklace adorned with the initials 'J' gleamed in the dim light. She tried to smile as she recalled when she first received it.

“Joe!” she gasped. “This is beautiful! Will you put it on me, please?” 

“Of course. Turn around for me.” 

The smile on her face was childlike as she stood back to chest with her lover. His warm hands pushed her hair over her shoulder then wrapped the chain around her neck. The gold complimented her skin beautifully. He connected the link to the clasp and tapped her hip when he finished. “Let me see, sweetheart.” 

Cleotha Jean grinned as she posed in front of him, the J on her chest smiling back at him. Joe nodded in approval, “Looks pretty, baby.” 

“You think so?” she gushed, running her fingers off the pendant. “Want a closer look?” Cleotha pulled him in by his belt loops and pushed him against the bed, climbing on top of him. SHe wrapped her arms around his shoulders and pressed butterfly-like kisses all along his face. His cheeks were stained red from her lips,

Joe’s eyebrow raised in amusement as he welcomed her affection, His eyes dropped to the pendant that swung against her chest. “Yes ma’am.” 

But it was the worn envelope nestled at the bottom of the box that stirred something deep within Cleotha's soul. With trembling fingers, she traced the creases of the paper, feeling the weight of years of unspoken words and unanswered prayers. As she unfolded the letter, the words spilled forth like a long-forgotten melody, each line a poignant reminder of a love that had once defined her very existence. 

The park was their favorite place to be. Especially during the month of September. The sun still hugged them, but didn’t suffocate them with her warmth. Nature sung its harmonious song, the animals danced with each other amongst the trees, and the grass was still a bright green. It was a peaceful place to be. 

It was like every other weekend; Cleotha Jean and Joe were sprawled across a picnic blanket with a basket of food propped open in front of them. Joe was lying on his back while Cleotha sat upright munching on strawberries and coloring in her book. 

“Cleo,” Joe said. Cleotha hummed and continuing coloring her flower. “I wrote you a letter.” 

Her coloring stopped. She swallowed the remainder of her strawberry and dropped her colored pencil. Joe reached behind him for a white envelope that he managed to tuck under the blanket without her noticing. He extended it to her, which she took with thanks. 

Joe watched as Cleotha curiously peeled open the envelope and retrieved the letter. It was folded in threes, and was filled from top to bottom. 

My forever sweetheart, Cleotha Jean, 

You don’t understand that I wake up everyday and give thanks that you walked into my life. I felt that I was nothing but a poor kid with seemingly nothing to offer the world until you showed me otherwise. 

I didn’t think it was possible to love someone more than I loved myself. Your existence proves me otherwise. 

I often wonder if you know that you are a gift in human form. Wrapped in a brown shell, garnished with gold. I wish to keep you with me forever, as long as you’ll have me.

I often think about our future together. How I’m going to marry you as soon as we graduate. We’ll buy a house, travel the world, and have children. I’m still banking on 3, but whatever you want, I’ll be content. As long as I’m with you, I’ll take anything.

I want to be yours forever, if you’d have me. 

Will you marry me? 

The letter flew from Cleotha’s hands as she screamed loudly. The birds above her croaked at her sudden outburst. Her hands flew over her mouth and she finally made eye contact with her lover, who’d positioned himself on one knee with an open box in his hand.

The ring was beautiful. It was dainty, just as she liked, and a rich shade of gold. His eyes were hopeful as he awaited her reaction. 

“Will you—“

“Yes!” Cleotha replied gleefully. She threw her arms around him so wildly that he fell backward into the grass. His laughs were music to her ears. “Yes, yes, yes! I’ll marry you.” 

Joe smiled, “Yeah?” 

Cleotha bit back a teary smile and nodded. “Yeah. It’s you and me forever.”

Her sweet baby. She hadn’t realized she’d been crying until she finished the letter and a puddle of tears smudged his neat handwriting. Cleotha folded the letter and put it back in the box, right next to the ring she took off months prior. It stared back at her and she forced herself to look away. She didn’t want to keep it, but Joe insisted she did, saying “it’s yours. I will never take back what rightfully belongs to you.”

With each memory unearthed, Cleotha found herself transported back to a time when love was pure, and the future seemed to be filled with promise. Yet, as she traced the contours of her past, a sense of longing stirred within her, a yearning for the man who had once held her heart in his hands.

She should’ve been over him by now, she scolded herself. Their union had ended more than a year ago; what was she holding onto? Well, another side of her probed. A three year relationship that began in college, an engagement, wedding planning, house hunting, and a planned future. It all dimished at the blink of an eye. It would take more than a year to recover from such emotional trauma. 

Cleotha befriended a bottle of red wine after that. It was sweet and savory, just like him. She chuckled lowly as her fingers dapped away the drop that fell from the corner of her lips. She should slow down, she figured, but it was the anniversary of a love that she cherished more than herself. She owed it to herself to get wine drunk and eat popcorn, right?

She tucked her feet under herself and poured another glass, humming a tune, though nothing particular, to herself. Just as she brought the glass to her lips, a knock sounded on her door. Her eyebrow quipped as her eyes darted to a nearby clock. It was 9:32 on a Saturday night, who could have been at her door. 

“Hold on!” she called out, glass in hand as she stumbled lightly to reach the door. She cursed as she stepped on a shoe that she kicked off in the entryway, toyed with the locks, and peeled the door open. “Oh…” 

If anyone would have told her he’d be standing in front of her right now, she would have called them a liar. The communication had been severed eons ago, only having heard from him when she got the job promotion she had been praying for. Any other conversation, interaction, or moment of desire, was a faction of her imagination. Yet, here he stood, a ghost from her past, with sorrow etched in his eyes and regret weighing heavily on his shoulders. And she had no clue how to handle it. 

She didn’t know whether to cry, scream, or throw herself in his arms. He looked so different than when she last saw him. He was broader, presumably from working out to keep in shape as he moved on from his athlete days. His hair was still platinum, but it was slicked back rather than messible touseled, though she loved it that way. His eyes, so gorgeous and blue, were so sad and empty. 

“Hi, Cleo…” 

Cleotha’s eyes welled with tears. She’d yell, scream, and put him in his place in the morning, but right now, all she could do is throw her arms around his neck and cry woefully into his shirt. With a voice choked with an emotion, she found the strength to say, “I missed you.” Her voice trembled with vulnerability. “I missed you so much.”

And in Joe's eyes, Cleotha saw a flicker of longing that mirrored her own. They stood in the doorway of her home without the exchange of words. The tears and gentle touches spoke loud enough. Maybe in due time, what was broken could be repaired, and the union that began years ago, could be recovered. Just maybe.

—

likes are great, but feedback is desired as well, friends! thanks for reading!

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

One of the most disappointment in the events us not having Oogie Boogie (seriously, that was a perfect way for Jamil to be scared and it's only one bug). But I didn't care anymore because of how slapped the song was. It made me repeat it over and over.

Also, the 'The End...?' is suspicious. Like is there a possible continuation of the Nightmare Before Christmas sequel event? Maybe it might explore the Christmas theme part or the Oogie Boogie part. I mean it happened with the first two Halloween events.

TO THE PERSON THAT SENT IN THE OTHER ASK ABOUT THIS TOPIC: So sorry 🤡 I intended to include yours in this post but my dumb laptop didn't copy paste the image properly and by that time I had already deleted the original ask from my inbox... JUST KNOW THAT I DEFINITELY SAW YOURS, I'M NOT IGNORING YOU... I PROMISE OTL

LET JAMIL BREATHE A LITTLE/j HE'S ALREADY BEEN TORMENTED BY MULTIPLE BUGS THIS ENTIRE EVENT 💀 The caterpillar, the spiders... I WAS LAUGHING AT FIRST BUT NOW I JUST FEEL BAD FOR HIM... Yes!! This idea was brought up earlier, actually. We talked about it briefly here. I have also heard a few people talking about the boys for the other half are the more traditionally “bright” or cheery characters, which would fit for a merry Christmasy event! Someone even suggested that this year's boys are the "Naughty" list and the other group to be featured in the future are the "Nice" list. Now that we know Oogie Boogie never physically showed up this event (but was mentioned a lot), it's possible he'll come for Halloween 2025, along with his twisted variant! The possibility is quite strong since this year's ended with "The End...?" AND a jingle bell sfx AND Lock, Shock, and Barrel scampering across the screen in the bathtub they kidnapped Sandy Claws in.

[luckykiwiii101]

Hey Upper East Siders. Want to play a game…? One condition, this time you HAVE to play by the rules. Or it’s game over…

- XoXo, Gossip Girl 💋 💌

And who am i? That’s one secret i’ll never tell, You know you love me - XoXo, Gossip Girl 💋 💌

————————————————————————————————————————

♥️🖤♥️🖤♥️🖤♥️🖤♥️🖤♥️🖤♥️🖤♥️🖤♥️🖤

————————————————————————————————————————

Hey Upper east siders.

It’s that time of year again. When the sleigh bells are jingling and people add more items to their never ending wish list.What if i told you…it’s more than just a wish list.Ever wanted something so bad that you would do ANYTHING to get it? Well luckily, i’m not talking about signing a contract in blood. You don’t even have to lift a finger, nor shed any blood…or tears. You can have everything you’ve ever wished for.You just have to play a little game. Will you accept this dance…? If the answer is yes…keep on reading.

Now that we’re nice and ready. We can get started on this super quick and fun journey. If i didn’t say this earlier, GOSSIP GIRL HERE!! and i have the BIGGEST news ever! YOU will have entered/woke up in the void state within a week and manifested your dream life! Maybe you’ll do it in less than a week, and have a holly jolly Christmas XoXo. Just depends on how determined you are.

You know what happens if you aren’t…right? There are two outcomes. Let’s go over them shall we..?

“Will you have this dance..?” “No”

(Option A)

SPOTTED: Lonely Boy. Can’t believe they didn’t want their dream life, only in exchange for a little persistence. How tragic……And EVERYONE is talking. Wonder what Blair Waldorf thinks. If only they knew how easy life was…

“Will have you this dance…?” “Yes”

(Option B)

SPOTTED: SPOTTED, On the steps of the Met: B. Looking perfect, as usual. Feeling perfect, as usual. Having everything they’ve ever wanted. So much for such little “work”. Did they really think they could just waltz over here and not manifest their dream life? So effortless, it’s almost funny.

So……Which do you choose?

(thought so)

Option B?! Good choice. Looks like Little J will have everything they want and a ticket to the inner circle. Why waste precious time dreaming when waking life is SO much better?

Luckily, your journey will be very short, and VERY sweet.

YOU’VE BEEN INVITED!

Serena Van Der Woodsen, your invitations just arrived. With strings attached. Come out, come out, wherever you are.

Gossip Girl here…enough with the stalling. Now for the main event.

You will spend the next 7 days, accepting that you are a void master.

What is the void state?

Well well well. Look what we have here. An overcomplicator on our hands, caught red handed. (Just kidding, XoXo)

It’s a state of pure consciousness. When you are detached from your physical senses completely. You can’t hear, see, smell or feel anything. Must be heaven if your name is Dan Humphrey.

Did you know, that you enter the void state everytime you fall asleep? Shocked? Well don’t be. It’s nothing special. Things always work out for you after all, should be used to it by now. Doesn’t it feel weird to finally have Gossip Girl on YOUR side? Can’t wait to pry into your success soon……and write ALLLLLL about it. You better not disappoint me, you know what happens next. Don’t wanna end up like lonely boy……do you?

“But i don’t believe in the Void State.”

- Said no sane person ever. Unless your Queen B with a broken heart.

Here you go! 💋💌💋

Does little J want a virtual slap of common sense? Don’t tempt me. A few clicked pics of your journey home could turn into a journey to hell. You know you love me. XoXo.

How do I enter the void state?

(Here you go 💌💌💌)

Looks like entering the void state really IS sugar and spice and EVERYTHING nice after all.

Hear those silver bells? It’s a void master INCOMING!!!

Applying states for the void state:

(Here you go! 💋💌💋💌)

And everyone knows the biggest present comes in the smallest box………not so difficult after all.

Then there are those boxes you are SO glad you opened.

“Challenges” to apply:

EVERYONE knows that there’s no such thing as a “challenge”.

“Take one It Girl on a pedestal. Add a crowd eager to see her fall. And give them the means to knock her down. So sad how they know they’ll only be the ones who end up falling” - XoXo Gossip Girl

Is Queen B Feeling frustrated? : (Lotusmi’s void challenge)

Always finding your hands in your hair and your fist in the wall? Well this one’s for you! (💋 💋 💋)

Love complaining? Of course you do! Talk about a Blair Bitch Project.

And for the building to really blow up, all you need is an unexpected turn. Who knew changing attitudes were so helpful?Especially for the Stubborn Blair Waldorf.

Desperately Seeking Serena: (3 day void challenge)

Is Queen S feeling like she needs a whole mind reprogramming in a gorgeously short amount of time? Well it’s time to turn that mental frown, upside down! (Here you go!!! 💋♥️💋♥️)

Ah, what’s that magic word again? Oh, Consistency! Whoops! Don’t tell me you forgot too?

And anyone who’s used to bending the rules will find themselves breaking them.

Feeling like a Dare Devil?: (Void Princess challenge)

Confidence is built, and NEWS FLASH!!! You don’t need confidence to build it. No expense is spared.

(Post is here 💋💋💋)

There’s nothing Gossip Girl loves more than a little……push. Not off of a building of course………ofcourse.

Of course Gossip Girl here isn’t going to link every single void challenge here. Wouldn’t you like to come up with your own? Use your favourite one to your hearts content.

As we all know, there’s nothing Gossip Girl loves more than a surprise.

Is that a smile we see on B’s lips? The spotlight’s on her for once and no one helped her get it. I guess “miracles” can happen.

Distraction Method (made by the one and only, Gossip Girl)

Another stray thought lands in B’s lap. Will she use it as ammunition or will she surrender and put down her arms?

Here you go! 💌♥️💌♥️

What happens if Queen B doesn’t want to persist?

No, that’s not a tear in my eye. It’s just allergies. Without you, I’m nothing. —Gossip Girl

Who doesn’t love a five-finger discount. Especially if it’s the middle one.

Look who doesn’t want to end up on my blog. Who will I gossip about now?

Who cares if i’m pretty if i fail my finals?

Everyone knows that Blair Waldorf is SO much better than Rory Gilmore. Luckily for Blair, the word “failing” is unheard of. Too bad for Rory, it’s all she thinks about.

Read this 💋💋💋

Hey Upper East Siders. We hear that World War III just broke out. And it’s wearing kneesocks. Choose your side or run and hide. We have a feeling this one’s to the death.

Why should I listen to Gossip Girl?

Because “I was a teenage drug addict” is not exactly a winning college essay.

Now have a holly jolly Christmas with your every desire. You can thank me later.

Every happy ending is just a new beginning. Because on the Upper East Side, the good times ALWAYS last forever. You know you love me, XOXO —Gossip Girl 💋 💌

[playvoices]

Time to get out.