#It's these lyrics that just stick with me because shit. Fucking love that part

[brainfilehasstoppedworking]

I could care less about the dress I won't partake in any cake Vows? Well, I'll be lying when I say "That through any kind of weather I'll want us to be together" The truth is I don't care for him at all

No, I do not love the groom In my heart there is no room But I still want him to be all mine!!

[hecksupremechips]

Time for me to be completely changed as a person! *just watched falsettos*

[p3ndeja6]

˖ ݁𖥔 ݁˖ 𐙚 ˖ ݁𖥔 ݁˖

skz x fem! reader

megan thee stallion songs (lyrics) inspired

content: porn without plot, ok maybe semi-plot, p in v, unprotected, creampie (hella), switch, dom, sub, established and non established relationships, jealousy, infidelity (Lee know part), and some other freaky stuff that I can’t remember, freaky in general

a/n: finally got this shit out the archives, lowkey ass but I’ve been out this game for like months so..

word count: 2.6k

lazily-proof read

Hyung line

BangChan

big ole freak

“I wanna fuck in the mirror, I like to look at your face when you in it”

it’s been hours already and you and bangchan are still going at it. not sure what lead to this part but it’s still going.. at this point, movements had gradually took you over by the vanity, a large brown mirror that 180 the entire room. Currently in front of it, tears streaming down your face as you refuse to look at the way chan had your hair in his hand pulling on it

skin clapping against your ass, holding onto the edge of the drawer. Moaning and whining at the feeling of how chan was giving no mercy. He laughed in a low tone, almost condescending.

“Cmon pretty, look up, see how you fall apart for me” he grunts pulling your hair for you to look at yourself in the mirror, you give in and open your eyes, looking at how pathetic you looked under his grip. You yelped at the tug, panting and feeling the heat of embarrassment rise up to your ear tips.

“atta girl, so beautiful, you look so perfect-“ he pushes himself harder, making you moan and lean against the drawer, “- crying for me, pleading with those big eyes of yours”

“fuck chan-“ you moan out “kiss me please” you whimpered quietly. He loved dominating you but melted like butter when you talked to him like that when all he did was murder your pussy. He grabs your chin nicely, making you turn to him almost at an uncomfortable angle. He kisses you so passionately, moving his tongue across your lips, allowing him to get access now inside your mouth. Getting nasty and sloppy.

You were starting to feel that knot in your stomach tighten, you let go of the kiss and make your head fall back down. concentrating on keeping it in, “my pretty girl wants to come already?” you let out a cry whimper, his soft dominate voice pushing you to the edge. quietly, almost lower then a whisper. “please.. please” he chuckled, knowing exactly what you meant

his hands that were placed on your hips, now grip even hard, holding you so steady, almost as if you were inanimate. the sticky,sweaty,skin slapping against each other. The way you can feel him pound into you as his balls smack against your ass.

“I’m so-so close baby” he whines, turning submissive. You bit your lip, knowing when he begins to falter that dominate persona, it breaks you. You prop your elbows up to look at you and chan from the mirror, biting you lip.

"me too baby, please come for me, i want it inside" you whimpered. Looking at him through the mirror, smirking, hair sticking to your face.

that was his breaking point because he gripped you sides so hard, pounded into you a couple of times and then released inside your cunt. you following right after.

holding you in place as you both try to catch your breath. After a few moments, he pulled out slowly, almost as if it hurt both of you, leaving you empty, feeling the warm liquid drip down the back of your thigh.

you finally are back to reality and your legs gave out, you hold onto the dresser again.

chan quickly holds on to you, chuckling.

“I got you baby”

Minho

Thot Shit

"He got a girl, but he begging to see me"

It’s been months since Minho cut you off. You guys were just friends with benefits and he saw you nothing more than that. You had some unresolved feelings for him but it never came to mind as much until after he cut you off. Told you it was over because he, quote

“found someone new, someone worth it”

ouch…

obviously you had no other choice but to move on.. technically..

He was never technically your boyfriend to begin with. So you had no right to feel upset, though you wished he saw you as “worth it”

On a random Thursday night, around 11:26 pm, you were feeling quite mischievous, you were starting to miss Minho, missing his touch, his dick, all of it

You knew he had a girlfriend but you honestly didn’t give a fuck. you started to send explicit pics to Minho on random hours of the night..

at first he never answered, until you sent him a video of you and someone else, quick video of the other guy fucking into you senseless.. though that video was quite old, you knew you had to pull it out the archives to make Minho break.

which he did… he broke…

“what the fuck y/n????”

“my bad”

a few weeks later since that text, he never replied and you thought that was the end of it. you decided maybe it was time to move on, or what not.

though you didn’t try to but the feeling of moving was there.

It was 11:16pm on a Thursday night, you were in your living room, freshly showered, watching a Disney original movie. Living in serenity in the comfort of your home. Until there was a knock on your door

you didn’t plan to invite anyone over, so you were cautious when checking the peephole. To your surprise it was Minho. you weren’t sure whether to be excited or nervous, because it’s been months since you’ve seen him last.

you opened the door and and quirked an eyebrow to him standing there in front of your door. you wanted to laugh but kept it in

“can I help you?” you said teasingly, he looked up at you, eyes dark, full of desire, temptation.. “yeah you can actually” you look at him giving him a subtle look of surprise. “I need you… I needed to see you… please”

“In what way” “you know what way”

he comes in your apartment, closing the door, looking at you so full of temptation.

“you know you shouldn’t be here, you got a girlfriend now, she can fill in these desires for you”

“she doesn’t feel the same as you” he doesn’t say more but just goes straight towards you, smashing his lips against yours. you were surprised by his move, but you didn’t take too long to react to his kiss

lips moving hungrily, Minho holds you tight, guiding you towards your bedroom, his feet almost moving in muscle memory.

he pushes you down in your bed, looking down at you, his eyes practically x-rays looking through your clothes.

in a quick swift motion, he takes your sleeping shorts of, small scoff comes out of him when he sees you weren’t wearing any panties.

“naughty girl…” he smirked.. caresses your thighs, rubbing them until his hands lead him to your wet, thumping cunt.

You were getting hot, missed this.. you missed him.. his fingers brush against yours wet folds, giving them gently swipes. Your breath hitching, making your head fall back, while you hold yourself with your elbows.

his fingers creep inside of you, making you let out a moan. he smiles, pumping his fingers deeper, and faster. The welching of your pussy making it clear in the already quiet room, with the distant sound of the Disney original you were watching in the living room still going.

your thin tank top sliding down making your tits pop out, having to hold onto something, you grab one and squeeze needing more sensations. he leans over to look down at you. “look at me” he says, moving his free hand to grab your chin. “I wanna see your face when my fingers make you cum”

this was sending you over, his fingers going at a dangerous speed, angling his fingers, hitting that gushy spot real good. Moving one of your free hands to grip his shoulder, your jaw dropping open, letting out desperate whiny moans.

you felt that knot getting tight, “Minho… fuck…please.. I’m gonna-” “let go"

with that, he takes his fingers off quickly, making you whine out loud from the emptiness of his fingers, you look at him and he was unbuckling his jeans quickly to take out his dick out.

“fuck… sorry but I need to be inside of you” he positioned himself in front of you, not waiting one second to go faster. Pounding in you, holding your hands down, looking down at you.

“I ain’t… fuck… I ain’t forget about that…video you sent…”

you were too dumb fucked to try to remember what the hell he was talking about. his voice more stern “hey look at me….you let… some guy fuck.. you like that?” He says in between thrusts.. each sentence would pound you harder, emphasizing his anger for you being with some other guy like that

“this is…. my pussy… I don’t share” He kept pushing himself harder, breathing heavily by your ear. You felt that tip hit your spot so good. Making your legs wrap around his waist. Wanting him so much closer.

“fuck… what..mmh…about it?” you knew this would get him more worked up. “what about it?… imma show you what I’m about”

his hips snapping against you, the skin slapping, and the wet welching sounds being louder then the actual tv.

gripping his back, nails scratching him all his backside. You were breathing heavily, moaning into his ear. “I’m gonna… Minho..” “me..too”

“do it inside me..”

Changbin

Ungrateful

“Legs to the head of the bed ‘cause I’m flexible”

Changbin just came from the gym, all sweaty and hot. You expected him to hop (cameo) in the shower when he got home but the first thing he did was go towards you and attacking you with desperate,needy kisses

you knew where these kisses lead you guys.

“Mm.. fuck.. you feel so good.. but I need more of you”

he says as he pushes your legs over his shoulders. Balls deep. You were a moaning mess, gripping onto the headboard.

headboard hitting the wall rhythmically, denting the wall in that one same spot over again.

pornographic moans coming out that pretty mouth he loves so much.

“god baby… you’re taking me..so mm.. so well” he says gripping onto your hips, brusiningly good. No thought was going on in your head.

“mm bin.. fuck.. right there!” you cried out

he couldn’t help himself, his speed making you get light headed. He kept pushing your legs further up,taking his so well. His fat tip hitting your spot so deliciously good, every thrust he makes, letting out a whiny moan.

gripping his broad,strong shoulder; you were close. “Bin.. gonna..” “hold it”

he wasn’t done with you yet. you cried out a moan. You didn’t know how much you had left to hold it. your stomach started to cramp by the pressure of his strong body leaning over you, pushing your legs further.

the creaky bed springs getting louder with every movement on the bed. headboard hammering into the wall.

“look at me baby, let me see how pretty you look while deep inside you”

you looked at him, doe, glossy, eyes looking up at him. mouth open as you moan out his name. you’re hands now holding onto your thighs. he looked so pretty as he fucked deep into you

“I’m so in love with you” he thrust harder

“I love you I love you” you cried out, like a prayer

he smiled down at you, those words pushing him closer to the edge, his hips getting sloppier

you knew he was close to his climax

“let me do it inside” he panted out, you shook your head yes immediately, wanting all of him so deep inside you. Didn’t care that you could end up having his baby from this.

“plesee.. do it.. inside of me.. need it inside”

his head falls back as his deep thrusts finish him, shooting his nut inside of you. You followed by squirting all over his cock. letting out the loudest orgasm yet with him. he holds his position a few seconds after you both finish. Slowly putting your legs down.

you wince a bit in pain,he looks at you amused

“you’re so flexible baby”

Hyunjin

crybaby

“moaning like a bitch when he hit this pussy”

you don’t do relationships. everyone knew that. as much as you keep telling hyunjin that. He can’t help but keep coming back to you

he begs you for him to let him hit. You’d be lying if you told him you didn’t want him to

He was too fine for you to reject his advances. That because whenever he hits, he gets whiny and desperate for you. begging you to let him nut inside of you. Always end up telling him to nut on your stomach

“mm..fuck.. y/n pleas… let me do it inside”

your back arching back, his long dick all up in your guts. “Mm .. no Hyunjin” you moaned out

he leans over you, next to your right ear, moaning and whining. Praising hold good your pussy feels.

“fuck y/n..you feel so good..” he couldn’t help himself but slide his fingers from your stomach down to your clit. rubbing it as he’s balls deep inside you. the overstimulation getting to you. Head getting dizzy, feeling so good.

“fuck hyunnie” you moaned out, arching your back all the way. His other arm holding onto you as your back is arched, angling you as he fucks you, and rubs you good. Your arms cover your eyes, feeling that feeling in your stomach get tight.

he thirsts harder and faster, he looks down at your fucked out state. Watching your titties bounce a bit from his thrust movements. Mesmerized by how you looks so ethereal like this, letting him do this to you. He felt good knowing that you don’t do relationships, let alone let some guy fuck you the way he is.

he loves you but he has never said anything. You’ve made it clear that you don’t do boyfriends, all is casual. Though since you two started fucking, to him it felt like more then casual. hang outs feel like dates, nights like these feel more then just fucking to him

the pleasure was getting too much too you, you were so close. He felt how close you were by the squeeze you did on his cock. moaning out loud at the feelings of you squeezing harder on him.

he loved your pussy, he loves eating it, fucking it, fingering it, all of it.

“mm.. so.. so close hyunnie” you let out. You were so drunk on his cock you didn’t even know what you said within the few seconds.

“fuck Hyunjin..” gripping onto him as he pounds harder.

“nut in me… i need all of you inside”

this set him off completely, pounder ungodly fast. Quickly busting his seed deep inside of you, you following after cumming all on his dick, moaning so loud, still heavy in endorphins

“fuck.. I love you” you say heavy breathing, trying to catch your breath.

he freezes and looks at you, seeing how pretty you look in the sex glow. Baby hairs sticking to your sweaty forehead, chest falling up and down from you trying to catch your breath. your legs were shaking at this point.

you pull him towards you, kissing him passionately. You’ve never done that before after sex. This kiss felt more then after other times you’ve guys fooled around.

felt real, more feelings were being said with this kiss. He didn’t hesitate but kissed you back, holding your head with his hand, expressing his true feelings to you.

“I love you too”

[bteezxyewriter12]

Be Mine

Pairing- Hobi x Named Reader

Word count- 4.6k

Includes- Fingering, oral, pussy eating, blow job, deepthroating, cum eating, marking, riding, missionary, multiple orgasms, fluff

Tag List- @mingtina @jaxminnie @yeosayang @delightfulmoonbanana @tannie13 @y00nzin0 @marsstarxhwa

@borntowalkaway @soulseobi05 @kpop-bambi @seokwoosmole @meowmeowminnie @realisticnotes @effielumiere @svnbangtansworld @pinkies-things @insomniacatiny @marvelfamily3000 @amyz78 @blueie-things

Masterlists- check out for more fics

📝Masterlists 📝BTS Masterlist 📝Hobi Masterlist

Hobi POV

I stare at her

I can’t keep my eyes off her

She’s not even doing anything special, just sitting in my room at the dorm surfing the web

It’s just me and her here.

The guys went out to eat.

They asked me if I wanted to go and I did but I’m so far behind in writing my lyrics for our new songs that I decided to stay

She said she’d keep me company

So we’re in my room, me on my bed with my notebook and her at my computer

I can’t concentrate

I can never concentrate when she’s in the room

She’s unlike anyone I’ve ever met

She’s short and beautiful

Her black hair is long and her dark brown eyes always shine

She has a tattoo sleeve on her right arm and scattered tattoos on her left.

She also has double eyebrow rings on her right eyebrow, which I hate on everyone else but love on her

Her personality is nothing like I’ve see either.

She’s feisty and doesn’t take anyone’s shit.. She proved that the minute she walked into our photo shoot and was announced as our new makeup artist three years ago.

She came in looking tough and honestly scary.

That day Yoongi was in a bad mood.

When he made a snarky comment in English about BigHit being desperate that they hired an American makeup artist she snapped back.

“Really? I don’t see your qualifications to determine what makes a good makeup artist. From what I see BigHit did everything to make this job worth my while because of my skill. I left an amazing job on "The Walking Dead” to put make up on singers and rappers. And I don’t need lip from said rappers and singers on some thing they have no idea about. So how about you stick to rapping and let me handle my job?“

Then she started talking in Spanish.

To herself I guess.

All of us had our mouths hanging open in surprise.

Surprised that she had the guts to answer Yoongi back.

Usually no one says anything to us.

Yoongi looked just as surprised and pissed off.

I don’t know if he understood what she said.

I got parts of it but anyone can tell by the tone of her voice and her body language she was pissed.

"Look I really don’t care how famous you are. I don’t take shit from anyone and I don’t let people walk all over me. If you respect me, I’ll respect you ten times over and will bend over backwards for you or to help you. If you fuck with me, be prepared to get fucked back.”

“Well then, I promise not to fuck with you”, Namjoon said

She nods

“I was told to do Yoongi, Hoseok and Jungkook’s makeup?”

“Yea Yoongi’s the one who made the comment.”, Namjoon says

“Great I’ll start with him”, she smirks

Namjoon translated every thing she said and Yoongi paled.

After that none of us gave her a problem and were afraid to talk to her at first.

But after awhile Namjoon started talking to her since he spoke fluent English.

And she was friendly and nice

Turns out she meant what she said.

If we were nice and respected her she reciprocated ten times over.

Even Yoongi apologized and they were cool.

She became one of our best friends

She is tough but once you get to know her she’s very loving, caring, funny and sweet.

Just don’t get her angry because then there will be hell to pay.

And when she starts going off in Spanish, it’s best to steer clear

So I’m in love with her

I fell for her the second she walked into that photo shoot

So imagine my disbelief when I found out that she slept with Namjoon and Yoongi.

Apparently, as they say, because she didn’t tell me, they did, it was only a one night stand.

Namjoon was teaching her Korean since she moved here three years ago.

She wanted to learn and he really was the only one who could help her since he spoke English and Korean.

She picked it up quickly and studied a lot to become better.

She basically fluent in speaking it and getting better at reading it

Namjoon told me that it happened one night while he was quizzing her in Korean.

He just kissed her and it went from there

The same with Yoongi.

She was in his studio.

He wanted to play the song he was working on and get her opinion.

While she was leaning over him as he explained the song on the computer and looking at the screen,

Yoongi said he stood up and kissed her.

It wasn’t planned and neither was the sex.

It just happened.

All this happened the first year she was here and hasn’t happened since.

She didn’t sleep with any of the other members and she doesn’t have a boyfriend.

I just found this out a few weeks ago when Namjoon let it slip.

Of course I’m pissed off and jealous but she’s not my girlfriend.

She can do what she wants

I wonder why she never slept with me though.

We’ve been alone together a lot of times.

We’ve fallen asleep together and cuddled during movies.

I’ve held her hand, kissed her cheek and nothing, not even hinted she was interested.

And I can’t help but wonder if it’s something about me.

Is something wrong with me?

Or does she just not want me?

These are the thoughts in my head as I watch her

She giggles at something on the computer

I love her laugh.

I can listen to it all day

She catches my gaze and smiles at me

“You ok Hobi? Having trouble?”

“Uh, yea a little.”, I answer, looking away embarrassed at getting caught looking at her

“You want help?”

“No, I’m good thanks”

“Ok. Let me know if you want any help though”, she says

“I will”

She turns her attention back to the computer

I want her.

I’m not gonna lie.

I thought about what sex would be like with her a million times

I love her but I know she doesn’t love me.

Not like how I love her

But if the only thing I can ever get is one night with her, then I want it.

So I decide to go for it

“Uh Jo?”, I ask

Yeah Hobi?”, she turns her attention to me

“Would you uh, I mean do you..”, I stammer

Fuck

I can’t do this

“What Hobi?”

“Uh nevermind”, I mutter

“C'mon Hobi. Tell me, you can tell me anything”, she urges

Fuck

Fine

I look down at the floor

“Do you uh want to have sex with me?”

Silence

I should of known.

I shouldn’t of ever asked

“Neverm-”, I start to say right as she said, “Yes”

“Wait what?”, I asked surprised

“Yes Hobi. I want to”, she says blushing

“You do?”

I’m totally caught off guard

“Yes. I’ve wanted to for awhile”, she answers turning redder

“Seriously?”

She nods

I can’t help it, I smile at her.

She wants me.

I’ve never been more happy.

She gives me a small smile then comes over where I am on my bed.

She climbs on my lap, one leg on each side of me, straddling me, my hands going to her waist

Holy shit

This is really happening.

She looks at me and smiles, reaching up and touching my cheek, looking in my eyes

I stare at hers, drowning in the beautiful brown of her eyes

Her hand goes in to my hair and she runs her fingers through it a few times

I close my eyes and shiver from her touch.

When I open them, I see her watching me

Then she leans in closer and presses her lips to mine.

The second they touch mine, heat runs though my body and stars explode in my vision.

I’ve never felt this way when being kissed.

By anyone

I pull her closer to me and deepen the kiss.

She opens her mouth for me and I slide my tongue in, caressing hers

Fuck she taste sweet

She kisses me harder, her tongue sliding on mine, her hands flying up to my hair.

I groan when she tugs on my hair

“Hobi”, she moans, making me harder than I was before.

“Hobi, I want you now”, she whispers

I want her now too

My hands grab the hem of her shirt and I pull it over her head, my lips reattaching to hers the second the fabric is over her head.

My hands start touching her all over

She grabs my shirt and takes it of me while I unclasp her bra, taking it off.

I turn and roll so she’s on the bed on her back.

Sitting up, I finally look at her

Fuck, her body is so sexy

I see things I never knew she had and just stare.

She has her belly pierced which is such a turn on.

She also has a tattoo on her side that I’ve never seen.

It's large and takes up her entire right side of her torso and ribs.

I run my hand down it and she trembles at my touch

She has huge breasts, that are perfectly circular and her nipples are hard.

And both of them are pierced

Fuck

That’s hot

I look at her and see the that she’s looking at me and my body the same way I’m looking at her.

I like that she’s looking at me like that.

It’s nice to have someone do that

To everyone else, I’m the funny, adorable sunshine J-Hope.

I’m almost never called hot or sexy as much as Jungkook, Tae, Jimin and Yoongi are.

I’m cute and adorable, not hot or sexy

But the way she's looking at me, like I’m the sexiest thing in the world, makes me happy.

She reaches up and touches my abs and then chest muscles that I happen to have now.

I’m glad I can be with her before they inevitably go away.

It’s hard to keep abs on my body

“You’re so fucking hot”, she whispers

“I have abs now”, I reply

She gives me a weird look then sits up

“Hobi..I don’t care about abs, if you have them or not”, she says

“You don’t?”

“No Hobi. Having abs doesn’t make you hot. The way you are, you’re personality, how funny you are, how sweet and caring and lovable, those things make you hot. The fact that you’re beautiful and have an amazing body, abs or not, is just a bonus.”, she explains

“I..I….”, I stutter

I can’t believe she’s saying this.

She’s the best girl I’ve ever known

“Anyone who cares about abs or looks is superficial and doesn’t deserve you. You have the best personality and that’s why I fell in love with you, not because of stupid abs.”, she says

I nod, freezing, realizing what she just said

She’s in love with me?

She feels the same?

Is this a joke?

Cuz it’s too good to be true

“You….You’re in love with me?”, I whisper

Her eyes widened, like she just realized what she said

“I..uh…I”, she stutters looking around

Then she sighs and mumbles, “Fuck it”

She looks back at me and says, “Yes Hoseok, I’m in love with you. I have been for the past two years”

I’m completely shocked and elated that she said this

“I know you don’t feel the same, and I was never going to tell you-”, she starts

“You’re wrong”, I tell her

“What?”, she asks confused

“You’re wrong. I do feel the same. I’m in love with you too. I have been since the second you walked in the photo shoot and told Yoongi off, three years ago.”, I confess

“Are you being serious? This isn’t a jokeright?”, she asks worried, “Because if it is it’s really not funny”

“No Jo. It’s not a joke. I love you”, I tell her

I can’t believe this is happening.

I’m getting the girl of my dreams.

If I ask her that is

“So does this mean you can be mine?”, I ask suddenly shy

“Yes Hobi. I want that very much”, she smiles

I feel my face break out in to a smile

I grab her and kiss her like I’m never going to let her go

Because I’m not

She kisses me back just as fiercely

I break the kiss and kiss down her neck to her collarbone, then to her shoulders.

She’s finally mine.

I’m so happy

I gently push her back so she’s laying down again

“I want to make my girl feel good”, I whisper to her

“Hobi”, she sighs

“Shhh Baby. I want to. Will you let me?”

She nods.

I’ve never felt like this with sex before.

I honestly don’t care about me or even if I cum tonight.

I just want to make her feel good and make her cum over and over

However I can

With every other person I just wanted to orgasm and then that was it.

Yeah I made sure they did too, I’m not an asshole.

I think I’ve only gone down on one girl.

But I can’t wait to do it to her

I want to make her shake and moan and scream in pleasure.

I want to watch her cum over and over.

I want to feel it.

And if I do, great.

But it’s not a priority this time

I pull at her shorts and slowly take them off.

She’s wearing some lacy panties thing that doesn’t cover anything and instead of taking it off, I just rip it off her body

“Fuck Hobi, that’s so hot”

I smirk at her, then open her legs.

I look down at her and see she’s so wet.

Fuck.

It’s one of the best sights I’ve seen in my life

“Baby is that for me?”, I ask

She nods

“Do I make you this wet?”

She nods again

I touch her and she jumps

“It’s ok baby relax”, I say

Slowly I push two of my fingers in her pussy and she moans.

Fuck, she feels so goddamn tight.

I start to move my fingers in and out and she groans

God I love the sounds she’s making

After a few minutes I take my fingers out and move them to her clit.

I start rubbing and massaging her and she yells out in pleasure.

I keep touching her until she starts shaking

“Are you going to cum baby?”

She nods

“Good girl”

She shouts out as she cums

I watch her pussy as she does, watching her cum soak my sheets.

Holy shit.

I’ve never be so turned on so much.

And my first thought is: I want it in my mouth

So I lean down and lick her cum off her

Shit

Fuck

It tastes so good, so sweet and I want more.

I move her to the edge of the bed, then I kneel on the floor

“Hobi”, she says

“Shh. I want to lick you.”

“Hobi”, she says again as I lick her from the bottom of her pussy to her clit

“Fuck”, she screams

I move my tongue all around her, swirling around, up and down.

I flick her clit with the tip of my tongue and she screams so loudly

So that’s where she likes it most.

I put my mouth around it and suck

“Ahhhh”, she yells

Is that where you like it baby?”

“Yeah Hobi, fuck right there, don’t stop”, she whines

“Ok I won’t baby”

Then I suck her clit hard and she cries out

“God Hoseok!”

I keep playing with her clit in my mouth and she gets louder and louder

“I want you to cum”, I tell her, “Can you do that for me?”

“Yes fuck yes Hobi”

I lick her rapidly and I feel her getting closer

I hit the spot she likes on her clit and she screams, “Hoseok!”

She cums in my mouth and I can’t get enough of it.

I swallow it and go back to lick more.

I’ll never get tired of the taste of her

She’s screaming, “More Hobi, more, don’t stop, please don’t stop. More”, as she slides her hand into my hair and pulls

Fuck I love when she pulls my hair.

She wants more and I give it to her.

She cums again, then again and then a fourth time.

And each time I lick up her cum like it’s candy.

Because to me it is

She relaxes a little but I want more

“I want more baby. Please, I gave you more, can I have more?”

“Mm..mm..more what Hobi?”

“More of you’re cum.

It tastes so good and I want it in my mouth”

“Fuck Hobi, that’s fucking hot” she moans

“Can I have more?”, I ask again

I’m not asking to be hot, I really want more

“You can have as much as you want baby”, she replies

I look up at her and she’s smirking

Two can play that

“Good because I want a lot”

Then I go back to licking and sucking.

I get her to cum two more times and I’m working on the third time, when I get an idea of something I want to try as she cums

I hear her moaning louder and louder and I know she’s about to go.

Right before she does, I slide my tongue inside her pussy and move it around

“Hoseok” she screams and this time her cum soaks my tongue as her pussy clenches and pulls it

I moan at the taste and sensation.

I only take my tongue out when she relaxes and lets go of it

“Fuck Hobi, that was…fuck..”, she says

I smile at her

“You’re amazing with your tongue baby”

“Thanks. I’ve only done that once so its nice to hear I’m good at it”

“No shit only once? You’re like a pro”, she praises

“Yeah well I didn’t like doing it so I stopped quickly”

“Oh Hobi. If you don’t like doing it then you really don’t have to”, she says looking concerned

“No Jo. I didn’t like doing it to her. I love doing it to you. I can eat you out all day”, I smirk

“Are you sure?”, she asks looking doubtful

Positive. Why would I beg you for more if I didn’t like it?”

“I guess”

“I promise you Jo, I love doing it to you.

"Ok Hobi.”

She smirks at me

Then she tackles me and pins me under her.

She kissed my neck and I moan from how good it feels.

I can never get enough of her kisses

“Now I’m gonna make you feel good”, she says

“You don’t-”, I start but she puts her fingers on my lips

“No Hobi. I want my boyfriend to be satisfied. What kind of girlfriend would I be if I didn’t?”

Her boyfriend.

That’s me.

I’m her boyfriend.

I’m still in awe of that.

That she’s mine and I’m hers

She leans down and kisses me, her tongue in my mouth.

I moan and as she pulls away she grabs my bottom lip with her teeth and gently bites

Fuck

That’s amazing

“I like to bite Hobi. Is that ok?”

“Yes, yes!” I moan so turned on, “You can bite me anywhere”

She kisses my body, gently nibbling on me but when she gets to my bicep she bites down harder and I groan in pleasure

It doesn’t hurt, it feels good

She continues kissing me down my body, her hands pulling at my pants.

She sits up and in one motion pulls my boxers and pants off

“Fuck Hobi”

“What?”, I ask, leaning up and seeing her stare at my dick

“You’re so big. Bigger than anyone I’ve been with”

Really?

For some reason that makes me really happy.

She’s still staring at it, while she licks her lips absentmindedly.

I almost cum from watching that and I know some pre-cum probably came out.

She doesn’t even have to touch me to get me to orgasm

It amazes me how my body responds to her.

And how hers responds to me.

I watch as she leans over and licks me from the base to the tip.

God

Fuck

She wraps her mouth over my cock and she sucks hard

“Shit”, I cry out

She starts moving her head fast, sucking and licking at the same time.

She moves up and massages the underside of my head with her tongue

“God that feels amazing baby!”, I yell

Then I watch as she leans all the way down and takes my full length in her mouth, deep throating me

Holy shit

That’s fucking amazing.

She sucks and I feel my cock all the way in her throat.

I’m very surprised that she doesn’t gag, she just keeps on sucking.

She lets go and looks at me

“Fuck my mouth Hobi”

“Wha..what?”

“Fuck my mouth. I want you to fuck me hard as you can. I want to feel your cock slide in and out of my throat.”

“I..uh..I”, I say incoherently, so fucking turned on

“Please?”, she asks and I nod

She takes me half way in her mouth and waits.

I snap my hips up and I feel my dick hit the back of her throat and go down a little farther

“Fuck!”, I shout as she moans

I start moving, in and out of her throat and it feels incredible.

She’s moaning while I do it.

I slide my hand to touch her pussy and feel that she’s all wet again.

Holy shit she likes this.

My other hand grabs her hair and wraps it in a ponytail around my hand and I can’t help but pull everytime I move

I feel her sucking as I move and before I know it I’m screaming her name, coming down her throat.

I feel her swallowing and it pulls on my cock, making me cum more.

I collapse when I’m done and she sits up.

“Damn Hobi”, she says, “You taste really good baby.”

I look at her and smile

She smiles, then looks down and says, “You’re still hard”

“Yeah”

She climbs on top of me, hovering above me.

I feel her wetness slide down on my cock and I get turned on again.

I could have sex with her all day

“You want it Hobi?”

“Yes, baby, I want it”, I answer

“Ok”

She slides down onto my cock, so fucking tight and I groan as she does.

Then she starts bouncing hard and I yell out.

She tightens her pussy around me as she moves and the pleasure increase

God she knows how to work me.

I grab her hips and slam her down on me, going in so deep.

She cries out, throwing her head back and her body arching towards me.

I sit up a bit and I kiss her stomach, sucking on the skin and making a hickey on her

“Yea Hobi, mark me up, so everyone knows I’m yours”, she moans

I give her a few more hickeys on her stomach, her moaning for each one.

I lie back down and thrust my hips up so that we both meet when she’s coming down.

We both yell out and go faster

“Fuck baby you’re pussy takes my cock so well”, I shout

“Yeah baby, your cock belongs in me. Just yours and only yours”, she whines

“Yeah this is my pussy, mine to fuck, my to eat”, I growl

“Fuck Hobi!”

“Cum on my cock baby. I want to feel you pull on my cock like you did on my tongue”

She listens and as soon as I finish talking she cums on me, pussy tightening and squeezing as she screams my name

I keep slamming her on me, yelling, “Scream my name louder baby. I wanna hear you scream louder!”

“HOSEOK! HOSEOK!”, she shouts and she cums again

I slide out and roll her over on her back.

I grab legs and open them wide pounding back into her.

My bed hits the wall over and over as I ram my cock deep inside her.

I want her to cum again.

I love feeling the way her pussy grabs my cock and doesn’t let go.

I hear the door to downstairs open.

The guys must be back but we’re too far gone to care.

I slam her and shout, “Who fucks you this good?”

“You, Hobi, you!”, she screams

“Seriously?”, I hear someone downstairs

I keep fucking her as I lean down and suck on her skin leaving marks on her neck, her breasts, her shoulders, her chest, so everyone knows she’s mine.

Just like she wants me to.

I suck on her nipple and I feel her clench me.

I get back up, still ramming her hard, feeling her getting ready

“Scream baby, let everyone know who makes you feel this good, who makes you cum this hard”

“Hobi!”, she screams and I feel her cum

“Louder!”, I command

“HOSEOK, fuck, yes, HOSEOK”

I look down and as I’m moving in and out of her, I see my cock covered with her cum.

It’s so fucking hot to see

“Who is he with?”, someone else asks

“We’re not done baby”, I tell her

“Yes Hoseok, yes more! More! I want more baby!”, she yells

I put her legs on my shoulders and I get up on my knees.

From this angle I can hit her deeper.

I slam my cock deep in her pussy and she screams for more

“Harder Hoseok. Fuck me harder, don’t stop!”, she screams at the top of her lungs

“Whoever it is, he’s giving it to her good”

I move harder into her and she’s just screaming incoherently in ecstasy

I hit a spot and she shouts, “Fuck right there Hobi. Right there. Yes, fuck yes, don’t stop.”

I slam that spot again

“Right there baby?”

“Yes! YES!”

“He’s going to break his bed with all that banging”

“Is that going to make you cum again?”, I ask her

“Yes!”

“But you came so many times today baby. You want to again?”

“Yes Hobi please! Make me cum again”, she cries loudly

“Ok baby.”

I pound her spot over and over waiting for her to explode

“Be a good girl and cum for me”, I yell

“Yes Hobi yes!”, she screams and cums again this time her clenching and pulling making me cum in her

I scream her name as her pussy sucks the cum from my cock, deep inside her

“Baby! Joanne! Fuck! God! JOANNE!”, I scream in pleasure

“Joanne? Oh my god he’s with Joanne!”, someone shrieks

When we both finish and I fall on the bed beside her.

She reaches for me and I go over laying on her chest.

Her arms wrap around me, and she strokes my hair

“They stopped. Did he really have sex with Joanne?”

I roll my eyes and shout, “Do you mind if I have fun with my girlfriend?”

She laughs

“Girlfriend? What? When is she you’re girlfriend?”

“Today!”, she yells, “Hobi’s mine and I’m his so get used to hearing us!”

“Great”

She keeps playing with my hair and I start to fall asleep.

“I love you Hobi”, she says

“I love you Jo”

I lift my head and give her a soft gentle kiss

“Night baby”

“Night”

I lay back down and fall asleep in my love’s arms

[queens-of-spirits]

The Poolverine Playlist

So as I mentioned in the latest chapter of my fic, I have a Poolverine Playlist. I had some people say they were interested so here it is! Please let me know if you have additions or edits to these songs to share! It’s under read more because it is loooooong. I was going to add links but tumblr will not let me add that many.

Like a Prayer by Madonna (3 versions). You know why this is here, I know why this is here, no explanation needed, it is their song

The Power of Love by Huey Lewis and the News. It’s the song that plays while Wade is searching for his dream man a wolverine

You’re the One that I want - From Grease. The Honda Odyssey song!!! The thing that, combined with the come hither motions, the taunting, the belt grab, and literally ever other part of this scene, makes it clear that there was a little more than fighting going on in that car.

If I Could Turn Back Time by Cher. I know this one is more from the second movie, but the themes of time travelling to undo past mistakes (specifically of cruel worlds like those initially shared between them) really fits their story

The Masochism Tango by Tom Lehrer. My personal alternative soundtrack to the Honda Odyssey scene. They both were enjoying stabbing each other a biiiiit to much for this not to be fair game.

Love Grows (Where My Rosemary Goes) by Edison Lighthouse. I can’t stop imagining this playing over a series of domestic vignettes post-movie where Logan realizes he’s in love. Also, there is hand-holding imagery, you’ll see a lot of that in this list.

Problems by Mother Mother. Particularly the first few verses. The whole finding love in a strange place while locked up in a cage is very them (“Not all of you was asleep,” anyone?) and that first bit about the singer believing that the subject is good enough for heaven but they aren’t? I can see the edits in my mind’s eye. The best part? It works no matter who you imagine as the singer.

Wrecking Ball by Mother Mother. This could be either of them, but I just can’t help by see Logan dealing with his anger and violence and idea that he ruined his worlds and then the two coming together to be fucked up and break shit together.

Curses by The Crane Wives. This is so Worst Wolverine. His world is destroyed and it’s his fault, but then Wade comes along and makes it all easier somehow.

Tongue’s & Teeth by The Crane Wives. Again, so Logan it HURTS. Feeling like a monster that hurts or destroys every good thing and will ruin Wade too, but willing to accept the fact that Wade seems to know this, but doesn’t care.

Predator by The Crane Wives (I really like their music lol). It’s on their latest albums and again. It really embodies the character of Logan to me. Tim’s hard to describe without just showing you guys the lyrics, so honestly go listen to it guys.

Sticks and Stones by The Pierces. This one is hard to describe, so please trust me and listen to it with Poolverine in mind

Iris by The Goo Goo Dolls. Okay, if I had to pick another song for the hand holding to Madonna scene, it’s this one. The vibes are immaculate, the theme talking about not being understood but finding someone who sees you are perfect, but that’s not why it’s here. It’s here because if two lines that are so much like Logan in that moment where he rushes in to save Wade. One: “you’re the closest to heaven that I’ll ever be/And I don’t want to go home right now.” This one is Logan finding something in Wade he’d thought he’d lost and realizing, perhaps even in that moment, that he doesn’t want to go back to a fixed world. Two: the very first line “and I’d give up forever to touch you.” Logan believes that if he goes in that chamber he will die, but he breaks down the door anyway. He’s literally giving up his effectively immortal lifespan (forever) to touch Wade because he’d rather die with him that live in a universe where he doesn’t exist.

Too Sweet by Hozier. This one is so Logan falling in love with Wade post-movie. Logan having another chance at life and Wade trying to pull him out of his most self-destructive habits while Logan can’t think of anything but how Wade is too good, too sweet for him.

This is Love by Air Traffic Controller. I love these boys but they are a liiiiittle toxic. This is that (plus the knife and gun imagery)

The Red Means I Love You by Madds Buckley. Remember that scene where Wade bled into Logan’s mouth and he had that feral ass grin and laughed? Yeah.

I WANNA BE YOUR SLAVE by Måneskin. You say rough sex I say Poolverine.

Big Bang Theory Man by Clare Fader and The Vaudevillians. It’s another toxic romance vibes song. This one has guns lol

Somebody to Love by Queen. I think this really exemplifies their lives before they find each other. They’re both lost, both put down by life and the world. They don’t know it yet, but they’re just looking for somebody to love.

You Give Love a Bad Name by Bon Jovi. A little more toxicity for the boys. Logan singing this about Wade works well. Like with the idea that Logan played his part in Wade’s game and got sent to the void. Plus comparing Wade to a loaded gun? Yes. Just yes

You Make My Dreams (Come True) by Daryl Hall & John Oates. I like to believe that they both made each other’s dreams come true. Wade got to team up with Wolverine and Logan got a second chance.

The Other Side from the Greatest Showman soundtrack. Look I know Hugh is the one singing here, but I can’t help but draw comparisons from this song to Wade dragging Logan away from the bar where he’s content to waste away.

I Don’t Care if You’re Contagious by Pierce the Veil. My beta reader (crypticanid here on tumblr) recommended this one so it’s here.

The Chain by Fleetwood Mac. The chain is them holding hands to save the world :-)

Dancing in the Dark by Bruce Springsteen. Here for dad rock energy and because it fits pre-movie Logan.

Shackled And Drawn by Bruce Springsteen. See above (Springsteen is peak dad rock to me)

Angel Eyes & Basketball by Foot Ox. Look at these opening eyes and tell it isn’t Logan “There are flowers growing all around a massive animal inside of me/And it's so ugly/And I'm so broken/And I'm so ugly/And it's so broken”

Heaven’s Gate by Amélie Farren. This is so Worst Wolverine pre-movie. He’s lost and helpless and blames himself for ruining his world. Also, the bit about “I was told that I was vital in the plan to save my life” is giving Logan agreeing to help Wade so the TVA can fix his world. And not believing in Wade and always running away before finally deciding to stay and follow? So represented in this song. Also! “‘Cause I didn’t deserve heaven, but I’m standing at its gate”? That is so Logan when he sees the start of his life with Wade stretch out before him.

Creepy Old Guy from the Beetlejuice musical soundtrack. This is one of the silly ones, but I find the idea of Wade singing this about Logan, who remember is over 200, really funny. He’s Logan’s controversially young girlfriend.

November by Sparkbird. It’s a song about travelling grouch parallel universes and the vibes are very Poolverine. Plenty of knife imagery.

Loser, Baby from the Hazbin Hotel soundtrack. Look I know this one is a little off the wall, but c’mon, it’s a song where an animal themed alcoholic and a hyper sexual gun-lover who are heavily implied to have feelings for each other sing about how life sucks and they’re both losers, but at least they have each other. It’s one the nose (I would actually cry if someone did artwork of them dancing in front of that billboard like in the show)

[little-diable]

Texas - Dean Winchester

I had to post this today, simply because I'm so so so obsessed with the header @deathofpeaceofmind created and y'all needed to see it. This is sad, but please give it a chance (I know y'all don't like reading my angsty fics). Lyrics from the song "Texas" by Jessie Murph. Please like and reblog if you enjoyed reading this. Enjoy my loves. xxx

Summary: When a fling turns into something more, but life forces you to part ways.

Warnings: 18+, smut, oral (f), angst, heartbreak, crying

Pairing: Dean Winchester x fem!reader (about 2k words)

You got all the good shit, and I got consequences, I'm cold, I'm lost, I'm ruined, and you go back to Texas

The sun was drenching the sky in a deep orange, a colour so vivid, Dean wasn‘t sure if he was awake or still caught in a dream. Silence engulfed him and Sammy, only Baby‘s sounds echoed through the air, doing little to drown out the confusion ringing in his ears, the messy thoughts he couldn’t shake off. 

It hadn’t even been an hour since Dean had parted from her, pressing a soft kiss to her forehead, not daring to wake her as he left her apartment behind, very well knowing he won’t ever get to see her again. Her, the woman that had instantly caught his attention the second he had entered that one godforsaken bar two weeks ago. Her, the woman that had ended up in Baby‘s backseat only hours after Dean had bought her the first of many drinks to come. Her, the woman his heart had called out to, and was now mourning.

Fuck, he had been stupid, so unbelievably stupid, and yet he hadn’t been able to pull away. He should have left her that night, shouldn’t have exchanged phone numbers, but he hadn’t been able to let her go, not without knowing that he’d get to see her again soon. (Y/n) had taken his heart hostage like a wanderer getting lost in unknown territories, ending up in the grasp of their enemy. 

But fate had never been kind to Dean Winchester, he hadn't been created to live a life filled with love, no, he was following the call of death, of all things coming to an end. An end (y/n) wouldn't see for years to come.

“Dean,” Sammy spoke his brother's name, carefully – just a whisper, not daring to rip his brother out of his trance without a warning, not used to seeing his piercing green eyes filled with tears. “It’s about her, isn’t it?”

Dean couldn’t help but scoff, cursing his brother for asking a question this stupid. Of course it was about her, about (y/n), the woman his drunken self would probably have married if their paths had crossed in Vegas. Sammy wasn’t oblivious, he had shared a few conversations with (y/n), understanding why Dean was that intrigued by her. And yet he still found himself surprised about the way Dean was now reacting to their departure. 

(Y/n) certainly hadn’t been the first woman Dean had found himself crushing on, certainly not the first he had wanted to stick around, but something was different this time. Something so awfully heartbreaking the older Winchester brother directed all his anger towards his stupid heart. Fuck, could one even fall in love, within a few hours, days? 

You came in like a one-man show, out of town, had a couple years on me, knew that shit I didn't know, and it felt so real that I couldn't let go, while you ran me around like a motherfuckin' rodeo

While Dean was driving through blurring by towns and areas he had crossed before, (y/n) was still laying in her bed, glassy eyes directed up ahead, staring at her ceiling. Her heart was clenching in her chest, a pain so unfamiliar (y/n)’s mind began to wonder if the past two weeks had happened or if it had just been a trick of her bored brain. 

Dean Winchester had ripped her heart from her chest, linking his together with hers to form a bond that was now pushing her into soaring waves of sadness, of confusion, and of anger. It felt like those movies, the ones she'd cry about on days where everything got too much and she needed to let go of the sadness bottled up inside of her. Stupid movies that had now caught up with her. She was paying the price of a crime she hadn't committed. But perhaps it had been her fault after all, perhaps it had been her fault for falling in love with a man she barely knew. A man with eyes so green her mind took her back to her childhood days, the carefree hours where she'd get lost in meadows and forests she no longer visited.

How dare he let go, how dare he leave her behind without saying much but a halfhearted apology that now rang in her ears like a song she couldn’t stop thinking of. 

With her eyes squeezed shut, (y/n) tried to get rid of her memories, trying to forget the past two weeks that have felt all too real, so full of an emotion she had stopped believing in years ago. An unlucky try that only pushed her further into her misery. 

“Don’t you dare close your eyes, darling.” Fuck, that grin would be the death of her. Dean was hovering over her, pressing (y/n) further into the comfortable mattress of her big bed. He was nestling between her thighs, tongue running through her folds with skilled movements, very well knowing how to touch a woman. (Y/n) didn’t allow her thoughts to focus on the women he had once touched, wondering who had taught him to eat out a woman like this, rather trying to relish in the warm contact, on the orgasm that was slowly but surely coming upon her. 

“Christ, you’re too good at this.” Her voice trembled, eyes struggling to stay open, focused on his handsome features, on the freckles lingering on his skin like star formations filling the night sky. A view so breathtakingly beautiful one couldn’t help but marvel at it. 

One of his hands found hers, interlacing their fingers to hold onto her as (y/n) let go, back arched off her mattress, toes curled. An intense sensation swapped through her, filling every pore of her trembling body, making her choke on her cries as if this was the first time she ever got to experience something like this. 

Her heart was roaring in her chest, a sound so unfamiliar (y/n)’s mind wondered if she was still caught in her own body. But Dean didn’t give her any time to ponder over her thoughts, crawling up her body with a smirk growing on his lips, kissing her before another breath could be inhaled into her aching lungs. She could taste herself on his tongue, once again reminded of their closeness, of the bond (y/n) found herself clinging to, praying that Dean wouldn’t ever leave her again. 

“Ready for another round?” 

A cry wrecked through her, hands holding her face, trying to dry the tears that wouldn’t stop rolling. The pain that stuck to her was too much for her body, not knowing how to get rid of it, how to let go of the waves that tried to pull her under, drowning the helpless woman. Fuck, Dean Winchester had broken her heart, without even giving her one good explanation. 

You go back to Texas like it didn't happen, like I'm not here with all of this mess, and you drunk and out and you wildin' out

“Does she know?” Once again did Sammy’s voice break the silence, not used to sitting in Baby without any music rumbling through the speakers. Dean’s eyes hadn’t left the road once, not looking at his younger brother once – no matter how much Sammy moved in his seat, trying to catch his brother’s gaze. 

“No.” It was one simple word. A word that pieced together the puzzle, finally falling into place, though so suddenly, without another warning. Deep down Sammy had hoped that Dean had explained their profession to (y/n), something that would tie the two together, giving them a reason to cross paths again. 

“But why? She would have understood. What did you say to her?” Pain. An emotion so blinding began to fill Dean’s system, forcing the memory of yesterday evening to resurface. 

“What do you mean by one last time?” (Y/n) was placed in Dean’s lap, naked body pressed against his. The two had shared a kiss that had left them breathless seconds ago, a sensation that had been interrupted by Dean’s words, forcing (y/n) to halt in her movements. 

“We are leaving tomorrow morning, Sammy and I.” She froze, trying to search his eyes – without any luck. Dean had his green eyes focused on her hands, fumbling with the fingers that had touched every inch of his body in the past days. He didn’t dare meet her gaze, very well aware of the pain that was now swimming in her pupils, the same emotion he tried to swallow down. An unlucky try that left him choking on the breaths trying to suffocate him.

“What? Don’t fuck with me, Dean.” She let go of him, crawling from his lap to reach for her oversized shirt, suddenly feeling the urge to hide herself from his eyes. It took him another breath to reply, trying to sort through his thoughts. 

“We got another job offer we had to take, I’m sorry.” Tears welled up in her eyes, raising her hands to momentarily cover her face and the expression of pain tugging on her features. An uncomfortable silence began to fill her bedroom, the room that had been filled with sounds of pleasure just minutes ago. 

“I, uhm, I need a few moments.” Her quivering limbs did little to support her, guiding (y/n) out of her bedroom, away from Dean and the tears welling up in his eyes only just now. 

“There’s nothing to understand, Sam. Our lives aren’t made for relationships, I’d rather have her hate me than end up hurt because of this fucking shitshow we are damned with.” Dean’s voice had a dangerous growl to it, trying to stop the conversation before he’d start overthinking once again. He had made his peace, even though he wasn’t able to swallow down his pain rising in his throat like bile. 

“I’m sorry, Dean. I really am.” 

“Will you stay for a bit longer?” Her whispers reverberated through the quiet bedroom, head placed on his chest, getting lost in the uneven beats of his heart. His big hand stroked her spine, forcing goosebumps to rise on her skin. 

“Of course.” Dean had a hard time speaking up, trying not to choke on the sadness he was overwhelmed with. Both knew that he’d leave in a few hours, forcing (y/n) to wake in an empty bed, hand searching for the warm body she’d never forget. 

“Thank you, Dean.” Both knew that she wasn’t just thanking him for sticking around for a few hours longer. Both knew that she was thanking him for the love he had elicited deep inside of her. Both knew that she was thanking him for the time he had spent with her, momentarily making her forget about the struggles both were stuck in. 

“I’d do it all over again.” 

You got all the good shit, and I got consequences, I'm cold, I'm lost, I'm ruined, and you go back to Texas

[theorionbunny]

Title: That kind of feeling, I’ve waited so long. Fandom: an extremely goofy movie Paring: Maxley Summary: Bradley is mermaid and Max finds out, with him other than tank being the only one to know will this be devastating or will work out perfectly fine?

author’s note: i need to be euthanised this took me three days in in total to write i hope you enjoy 🫶🫶🫶 (i used daft punk lyrics from the song digital love for tittle btw)

There was always something off about mom she hated getting wet but she always looked longingly at the ocean, she hated eating seafood and when my father ate it she stared at him; the look behind her eyes was like he killed a friend or something, me and my sisters were not allowed to go in the water, bathing and pools were fine but the ocean and lakes well you’d get a look and pulled away. She never told us why, and would stay completely quiet and reserved if we asked boring holes into your eyes with hers until you walked away and father would huff as you did.

I feel like saying all of this is making it seem as if I disliked my mom, and I don’t I loved her more than anything. I was definitely what people call a “mama’s boy” and I am not ashamed in the least of this notion. She was always my favourite she didn’t yell if I messed up or came home untidy from playing in the yard, she just smiled fondly and helped clean me up, she found it cute when I played with her clothes and makeup to make myself look more like her. I look like my dad the most, I hate it. My older sisters look like her and I got the shit end of the stick, all I got was her eyes I wish I got more. Mom talked my father into letting me dye my hair blonde like hers it took months but it’s blonde now I really like it.

She was the best, but she lied. Lied about what dad did to her, lied that she was okay, lied about well I guess she didn’t lie about that but she did keep it from us, from me. Because he made her, who the fuck marries a mermaid and then makes them keep it to themselves that, that’s what they are anyway? Well he does I guess, it’s part of his superiorly complex or something. The knowledge that he has one of the most beautiful mythical creatures under his thumb and that he’s the only one who knows it. I was fifteen when I found out I had woken up and there was six strange lines on my body I noticed while showering, two on my forearms, two on the upper and two on the sides of my neck completely symmetrical. I went to my mom after and she didn’t say a word she just held her breath and looked at them studying them almost.

She did something I never thought she’d do, she took me to the lake the one our dad always fished on. The one we were never allowed to go near and told me to get in the water. I trusted my mother with my life so I did as she said and was scared but I did it she was right behind me as I walked in I didn’t know how to swim obviously but right as I was submerged and about to not be able to touch the bottom, she put her hands around my waist held me close and told me to take a deep breath, I did and she dove down into the lake with me in her arms. I won’t lie it was some magical girl shit but it was amazing the lines on my arms and I can only assume my neck two opened up and there was this weird fish fin like thing that came out my legs felt weird like they were stuck together but it wasn’t uncomfortable it felt, right almost.

And it was because I was just like her, like my mother, a fucking mermaid. Jesus this is insane to say, it’s been three years since that happened. I’ve graduated high school and I’m on my way to collage, at least mom got to see that. She got to go to my high school graduation but she’ll never see anything else she passed a few months ago, stroke while she was asleep we were too late.

The alarm blared and sun came through the curtains on the window. I feel like shit, it was 10:25 I had and hour before my classes started now, do I go back to sleep for half an hour and show up looking like I crawled out of the ocean or do I take a shower and get ready? It doesn’t matter that much as since I started a fire at the X Games, attempted to cheat, got caught and almost killed Tank and that damn freshman (now sophomore) a few months ago everyone pretty much hates me and doesn’t give a shit anymore…back to bed for half an hour it is. I laid back down and was about to fall back asleep when there was a knock at the door. Crap it was Thursday, Thursday was when everyone in the Gamma fraternity woke up at the same time and went down stairs for an…intervention of sorts to make sure no one is quote end quote “loosing it” no one says it (at least out loud) but, I know I’m reason.

I was so scared of loosing the games and so stressed about failing that I cheated and almost killed people. It’s a no bullshit space no matter what you say it has to stay in the house, no one can laugh, no one can judge it. It’s so fucking scary. I trudged down the stairs I was the last one just my luck, there was one space left a lonely chair almost in the dead centre of the room ooh how riveting. Tank always started by saying good morning to everyone like some group therapist and we always went by order of names first not last, i was third first was Aaron and the Aidan then me.

The two had relatively normal lives, Aaron got a gift basket from his mom as a ‘just because’ and Aidan had been having some trouble with his partner something about them being stressed over a test and him trying to help but it not going very well. Now for the grand show my turn I sighed as I worked up the courage, Tank was starting to forgive me and the others knew my family my father in particular. Save the amount of times they heard him yell at me and call me a horrible son for petty shit, so even though I didn’t deserve it they were sympathetic, rightfully upset still but sympathetic nonetheless. “My…” I took a breath, “My mom’s death anniversary is coming up in a few days, so I’m not doing the best.” I looked down the whole time my tail in between my legs and ears hanging lower than usual. Tank put his hand on my shoulder and spoke “on the day of I’ll tell the teachers you’re sick so you can go to the beach like you always do.” He smiled softly and winked after he finished he was the only one who knew.

I’ve known him since grade school when, “it” happened I convinced him to skip classes with me to go to the water I jumped in and showed him, he was definitely freaked at first but after it settled in his mind he thought it was cool. The other Gammas went the only other person who had an actual story was James he’s pretty new but he’s nice, his grandma called yesterday to tell him the cat died and he would be leaving for home in a few days to spend time with his family and reminisce. I wish my family was happy enough for that we don’t even get together for my moms death hence me going to the beach…alone well among other things. Two days, just get through two days then you go to the beach.

Surprisingly it did go by fast but whether that’s because I have a bad conception of time or because I spaced out for two days who knows, but finally I could go. I grabbed my bag it had some spare clothes, something to eat and another smaller bag to actually take down into the water with me. I walked to the beach and just like always there was no one there. I’ve noticed that if a collage student is going to skip class it because they need a mental day so they stay home instead of going out to party or hang out with friends like in high school.

I started to take my pants off when I heard foot steps I froze and turned my head it was. You have got to be fucking kidding me. Max Goof of all the people, him. Y’know what fuck him, fuck him. I am here for my mom and I am not going to let him ruin this plus he’s a little farther down and by himself, if I stay quiet he shouldn’t see me. I continued to undress myself and dove into the water, it was cold but I was used to it I felt the changes and then took a deep breath in I sat there for a few seconds before realising someone was…calling my name well a dumbass shortened version. I huffed and swam back up if he thinks I drowned he’ll definitely come down here.

I popped the very top of my head out and tried to keep the movement of my tail just enough to keep me up “what?” I said sharply, “Sooo the goody two shoes skipping? Tank said you were sick.” Of course he did. “I am sick, sick of this conversation.” I said as a matter of factly, “already? It just started…brad.” I hate this kid so much and it’s not even because of the X Games anymore he just gets on my nerves with his dumbass sense of humour, and stupid big doe eyes, and, and pretty long eyelashes, wait- what the fuck i am saying? God I’m creepy.

“Brad?” He took me from my thoughts “I told you not to call me that!” I yelled “why do you hate it so much?” He asked I thought about it, well I was trying to be open but with him? Ugh who cares, “it’s what people call my father, so I don’t like it.” he stared at me “what?! You asked!” I yelled again. “I know, I know I just wasn’t expecting an actual answer.” He put his hands up defensively I rolled my eyes I contemplated diving back in the water but if I did he’d see, but do I really care no one would believe him if he tried to tell anyway. “So” he started again “what are you doing here” that’s a dumbass question I muttered “what does it look like? Swimming” I said at full volume this time “well i know that but, why?” So so many stupid questions I groaned inside the comfort of my head “if you must know, my mom passed away five years ago today and we always swam together so, yeah.”

He looked surprised at my transparency, which is fair I’ve been pretty mean to him this last year. “Wow, um that’s I’m sorry I wasn’t expecting that.” “Yeah no one does.” He looked at me, like really looked at me and. Wait, why are his eyes looking at my neck, oh shit. Busted, fuck “well uh I should uh, I should go now. Like right now, bye!” And then I did the single most stupidest thing I’ve ever done in my life…well in the last three months, I shot myself out of the water and dove back down. There’s a chance that he didn’t see the 5 foot pink tail…right?

I heard the sound of water splashing behind me, shit. This is why I hate him, he makes me clumsy in my 23 years of living I have never let anything slip and in the 8 years of that I’ve been like this no one has found out because of a clumsy mistake like that. I stopped swimming and turned around he was following me, of course he was I sat there watching him slowly but surely make his way to me I lifted my arm to point behind him and sternly said “go” he just kept swimming and I know he saw me as he was making eye contact with me as he slowly continued to swim forward.

I decided to keep going thinking he’d run out of air and have to bail, I was wrong we’ve been down here for almost a minute impressive but annoying. I finally turned again to shriek out “stop following me!!” He looked at me face full of determination and made one swift shove forward in the water far enough to reach out quickly and grab the base of my tail he pointed to the surface jabbing his finger up as he made a stern face I shook my head and started thrashing to try and get him to let go and leave me alone.

Just to my luck I slapped him with my fin hard enough to make his mouth open within seconds he let go starting to choke from lack of oxygen and tried to make it up he would never make it I sighed loudly before grabbing him and at full speed swimming up when we got up he gasped for air and I started swimming to the rock where this shit show started, I lifted him up onto it and he continued to gasp. I crossed my arms and laid them down onto the rock and laid my head down on them promptly after, when the gasping stopped I looked up just to enough to uncover my eyes. He was just staring, “you good” I tried it was muffled but not so much that he couldn’t hear me, nothing, “you know it’s rude stare no matter the reason?!” I was starting to loose my patience, again. “Okay well if you’re gonna sit there like a dipstick I’m gonna go” I lifted my head up all the way and started to turn. “Wait!” I stoped and looked at him expectingly “I just, i don’t know, I” I huffed and it looked like he was trying think of what to say. I felt cocky and decided to act full of myself I plastered my usual nasty ass smirk on my face and said “what? Left speechless by my breathtaking beauty?” He looked up slowly “kinda yeah, actually.”

Okay wasn’t expecting that but whatever, I lifted myself up fully onto the rock and laid on my stomach “yeah I tend to have that effect on people.” He smiled slightly before opening his mouth to speak “how, like how?” He gestured to my tail. I looked back and swished it slightly back and forth “I, I honestly don’t know. I mean I know it comes from my mom but that’s all I know I never asked her what her story was, I always thought if she left it was for good reason, especially because my father wasn’t always bitter so I know he didn’t threaten anyone or anything.” I looked back over to him he looked mesmerised, it was kind of cute actually. “Any other questions?” I teased, he looked at me and said “yeah but I feel like you’ll slap me.” I smirked again “eh go for it, I’m feeling gracious.” He smirked back and narrowed his eyes while raising his eye brows, well i don’t like that look. Not one fucking bit. Wait is he gonna ask- “where’s your junk go?” My face dropped and his just got impossibly more smug “you’re right I am gonna slap you for that” I got off my stomach and sat up right lifting my tail to the side of his face before raising my hand as well and asking “You want the tail or my hand?”

He started laughing and his eyes trailed down my tail before landing on the slit in the middle of my tail at the top right below my bellybutton, I jolted up and shoved hands in front of it “okay buddy that’s enough of that creep!” He doubled forward laughing, I felt the heat rise in my face. Yep he thought this was hilarious. I looked at him dead in the eyes and with an unamused expression asked “what? You want a mermaid sex ed lesson or something?!” His laughing subsided and he said “on the prospect of being genuinely curious, yes.�� He paused “on the prospect of it coming from you? No.”

“What you think I’m not good enough to teach you or something?!” God why am I so competitive INreally gotta put the shovel down bc this hole is just getting deeper. He chuckled and looked at me almost, fondly? No that’s not what that was it couldn’t be. “You’re kinda cute when your flustered” I was about to answer with what I don’t quite know but i was interrupted by a tingling in my legs I looked down the colour was starting to fade meaning I was drying and my legs would be back soon, I look over to where my bag was and tried to start reaching for it “what wrong?” Max asked. I looked over and said “I’m drying so unless you want to see me naked I suggest you help me grab my bag.” He looked like he was trying to fight off a smirk, he better fucking not do what it looks like he’s thinking about doing. Unfortunately he doesn’t hands me my bag- wait, unfortunately? Where the fuck did that come from? He hands me the bag but his face still says he wanted to keep it from me, ugh I can’t tell if I’m delusional, paranoid, both or neither.

As I grab my clothes my tail continues to thin until my legs are back I quickly pull my pants on and pretend not to notice Max leering at me every now and then. I look up and he pretends he was turned around the whole time I almost want to say something just to tease him but, we’re getting along right now I don’t want to ruin it.

I stared at the ceiling it was 1:23 it was still dark out Max was probably asleep, we had the same english class so I knew his first class was 13:30. He was actually really smart, as my English class is a senior level class. Thursday was nice actually, it was the first time on my mom’s death day I actually felt consoled, happy even. yesterday me and Max actually smiled at each other in hall. He gave me his number and told me to text him if I ever wanted him for anything. would I seem like a freak if I texted him now? I checked the clock only a minute had passed, well here’s to hoping he sleeps with his ringer off.

max🛹

hey, would you want to go to the beach with me? as in now if you’re not sleeping that is.

sure gimme a sec 2 put a shirt on

oh he answered immediately, of course he texts like that. Wait, he sleeps shirtless- no no no, don’t go there Bradley that’s creepy, I sighed and flipped my phone shut, I started walking to the beach, when I arrived he wasn’t there yet so I undressed and dove in. A few moments later I heard foot steps when I looked up it was Max he was wearing his usual red shirt with a pair blue board shorts. He smiled at me and sat down two towels, he shucked his sandals off pulled his shirt off and slid in. Eyes up there Bradley don’t you dare, he was the first to speak “So, what’s up?” I cocked my head slightly “What?” he chuckled “Well you asked me to come, so I thought maybe something was wrong.”

“No, nothing’s wrong. I was just- as stupid as it is, lonely I was…lonely” he smiled, “that’s not stupid, kinda sweet actually. And shows you have changed, in a good way” I raised my eyebrow “I just mean, because last year you would have never called or texted me to hang out with you when you were lonely, you hated me and now here you are. You’re nice to be around now.” He finished I looked off across the the horizon line “I didn’t hate you.” I muttered “what?”

I sighed and looked back at him “I didn’t hate you” I said again louder this time, “oh” he said lamely. I sighed a second time “I admi- I was, ugh. I thought you were cool. And yeah I had a really, really shitty way of showing it but-“ “the shittiest” he cut me off. “Shut up! I’m trying to be sincere for once!” He giggled and I continued. “When I first saw you I thought you looked cool and you were, are good at skateboarding. So I decided to follow you and I did, I asked you join the Gammas and you said no. And that was embarrassing to me because you were this really cute guy and you did something not a lot of people did and that was say no to me. And on top of that you made fun of me a bit but the point I’m making is-“ “you think I’m cute?” He stared at me, I stoped and froze.

I. Did not. Just say that. Every instinct I had just kept screaming ‘Deny! Deny! Deny!’ But for some reason as I continued to stare back at him all I could stutter out was “Is, is that o-okay?” He let a breathy chuckle and smirked as he said “So what I’m hearing is, you had a crush on me and were pulling my pig tails like a toddler.” He teased I felt the heat rise in my cheeks and the butterflies pool in my stomach. I just stared at him I had nothing, no sarcastic comment, no mean comeback I’d kick myself in the ass for later, nothing. All I had was the truth, for once. “I, I suppose so”

I started to back up in the water slowly, I quickly said “I’m sorry that’s probably insanely creepy, I was horrible to you for a year hell I almost killed you and now I’m here and throwing that at you and-“ he grabbed my wrists and held me where I was, “no, you’re just shit at feelings.” He had a stupidly cute shit eating grin on his face. “I guess that’s one way to put it, but it’s still not an excuse” I muttered, when had he pulled me so close?! “Never said it was.” He muttered back.

We sat there in silence for a few minutes, I’m 80% sure he had been using me as a buoy at this point but I found myself unable to care in this moment. His eyes flickered down to my lips “kiss me.” I started to lean forward, “What a gentlemanly way to ask.” I said closing the distance before he could say something in return. We stayed like that until we couldn’t breath, when we pulled apart he peppered a few light kisses in the crook of my neck. “So now that I kissed you is some weird mermaid shit gonna happened” he asked stupidly “yeah, you’re gonna sprout gills and turn into a guppy fish so I can keep you with me forever.” I replied “Sweet.” He said with a tone that can only be taken as fondly as he continued to lay his lips lightly on my neck and collarbone.

This was peaceful, the cool water, my tail and his legs brushing against one another slightly entangling every now and then, and his arms on my waist mine around his neck holding him as close as possible. I sighed and for the first time in a while it was out of content, until he stoped to leaned back slightly and peer downward at the water I looked at him confused until he said

“So that’s where your junk goes.”

[badnewswhatsleft]

THANK YOU FOR THE MANIA TEA POSTING like genuinely im so. interested in it i wish to know more…like we know some parts but i need the full picture u feel me

LITERALLY mania tea is fascinating im constantly microwaving it in my mind.... like don't get me wrong i rlly do love mania i will defend it always, but knowing joe was absent from and particularly unhappy with it... it doesn't affect my enjoyment of the album per se, it just always. sits in the back of my mind.

it was pretty obvious that joe was literally effervescent with pride in being more involved for srar. it was very interesting to me to find out llamania demos were likely joe & patrick close collaborations because you can tell joe really valued those sessions. for smfs: "[...] i have been more a part of the process from the ground up than i have been in years. i feel a personal connection to these songs." (p.211). and in that discord q&a "i like collaborating with my band" - like that guy clearly loves working with patrick/his band so much😭🥹

(and idk i have to shoehorn this opinion in llamania is soooooso so so so excellent to me like i promise thats not even joetrick brain speaking because i loved it before i even knew any of this info. like hello musically and LYRICALLY all 4 mins of it is already so good and interesting. im so serious)

so to see what happened with mania is so interesting. im just so stuck on the fact that joe says patrick initially agreed with him on the idea of returning to a more acoustically driven sound!!

like why would there be/who would make that sudden call to scrap everything...??

at about 00:58 in this vid patrick explains that the way it used to work, he and pete work so smoothly together they would produce a bunch of material and then ig the industry machine steamrolls on. from the sounds of it in joe's book as well, i wouldnt be surprised if maybe some version of that had happened again for mania? this is so tragic because all of srar they were so fresh faced adamant that the process would be different this time round lol. lmao even. but then... again: the fact joe says before going into mania, patrick had agreed with him on returning to a "band" sound again in the first place is still very intriguing?!?! which then leads me to think about the following -

there are also these points about mania from the guys that also give me much food for thought.

(source) "it didn’t feel like it was what me or Patrick really wanted to be doing but we both thought that was what the other wanted!" literally what. i dont like to extrapolate from one sentence where i cant even read his tone or body language but. what kind of dysfunction lol

(source) wild post-mania description of mania. everybody fights and everybody's miserable sweeeeep

also sorry for scuffed photos of book pages but the way joe describes it all is.

ummm i don't remember if i had a point to this. mania is literally like "this tea ain't shit" and half an hour later im pacing back and forth muttering to myself with none of this rocks open in my hands sticking book tab stickers on every paragraph. unfortunate album of strange creative frustration and pressure from pop culture and industry trends and joe clocking himself the fuck out of it we love to see it !!!!!

[chris-continues]

Trigun Band AU

General HC’s + how you meet

TW: suggestive (just heavy kissing)

SPECIAL THANKS TO @h4venpha @sapphirescience @linkdedruid and @beanibon FOR HELPING ME BRAINSTORM ILY GUYS AND IF U WRITE ANYTHING BAND AU PLS TAG ME <333 (in all caps to indicate enthusiasm) (shakes violently)

TAGS: @millionsvash @macncherries @lune010 @astrathecowboy @captaintweet

Let me know if you want to be added or removed from the taglist!

You’re a classmate of Wolfwood’s in college and find out he’s apart of a rock/alt garage band named Gunsmoke with some of his friends- one day he’s frustrated that it’s his turn to do some of the managerial stuff and as he’s complaining to you about it, you suggest that you can take it up. You’re interested after all, and he seems chill enough so.. why not?

You meet him there with his brother, Livio (singer), who’s wildly cute and sticks to him like a social anchor, then meet Vash (drummer), Meryl (second vocalist), and Milly (guitarist) who are inside setting up (Wolfwood is a bassist)

Over time you do more gigs with them and have fun, soon pining after all of them lowk…

Wolfwood guides you with a hand on your back, Livio uses his hand to prevent you from bumping into anything, Meryl lectures you (she’s just worried about you!!), Milly grabs sweets for you, and Vash sometimes stands a bit close to you, gaze lasting a bit too long.

Also Livio’s lyrics start sounding a bit more romantic too :0 (I wonder why??)

Polycule begins!! (Livio and Wolfwood are platonic since they’re brothers) and they’re the best partners you could ever ask for

While getting ready for a show, you’re their “good luck charm” (meaning they kiss you right before a show)

Milly kisses your cheek, Meryl is too shy to do anything but will give your cheek a kiss if she’s nervous, Vash peppers kisses over your face, Livio is also usually too shy but Wolfwood teases him about it like “what, too shy to kiss your own partner Liv?” And then Livio pecks your lips and hides his face, Wolfwood pulls you in by the waist and kisses you then tickles you cause he’s a piece of shit (affectionate)

Vash will cheekily go, “And this song is for you, mayfly.” And wink at you. Whenever this happens, Meryl usually feels part of your secondhand embarrassment and adoration and facepalms

Songwriting sessions with them consist of Wolfwood and Vash tapping their knees and making dumb noises to make a beat that somehow eventually works?? And Meryl is like, “how do you guys do it?? >:0” cause she’s been tryna construct something for a hot minute.

Livio is actually pretty good at coming up with lyrics, constantly humming under his breath with headphones and finding inspiration. It’s really cute. Him, with his hair up and knees curled to his chest as he sits on the floor, hand tapping as he hums.

Milly does something similar w/ drum beats! Sometimes they’ll be sitting next to each other and doing it and their hands touch. He gets really flustered and she’s like, “Awww”

During these sessions Milly, Livio, and you often go on snack runs (they both have sweet tooth’s)

Making out with Wolfwood in the back room.. his tongue piercing is cool against your lip

Also both him and Vash have matching tongue piercings, they fucking love to tease their partners with it because GOD it’s something

Livio gets one a bit later (so far for piercings he has snake bites, vertical labaret, his eyebrow, + industrial and other ear piercings), no tattoo’s though.

Vash has a smiley, a bellybutton piercing, along with a few ear piercings (and his tongue piercing), but one drunken night Wolfwood dares him to get a tramp stamp. He also has an inner lip tattoo saying, “babygirl” in cursive lettering

Wolfwood has spider bites + tongue piercing and has a matching tramp stamp with Vash (it’s a heart design with flames coming from the sides)

Wolfwood and Vash asko have matching nipple piercings

Milly would have an industrial, Meryl with a septum + a few ear piercings. I think they both would keep it pretty light.

You guys potentially get matching tattoos? (Smth w/ angel wings?)

Wolfwood gets it on his back, Vash on his wrist (so he can always look at it) Livio also gets it on his wrist, Meryl on her sternum and Milly on her shoulder/bicep

[skittlespizza]

TF2 Mercs as the Crane Wives Songs/An Analysis of All the Mercs

This one is going to be a long one, but as is customary with my fandoms, I will be assigning characters songs from the Crane Wives discography. I won't be going lyric by lyric explaining why it relates to the character as it will make the pacing and general setup of this post awkward, I'll just highlight the lyrics that matter.

I will be sticking to their canon personalities. I will be avoiding as much fanon interpretation as possible, and will be avoiding shipping content & common headcanons. It's nice to re-engage with canon media as a nice refresh for interpretations and headcanons.

SCOUT- Take me to War

Take me to War is about anger and fighting. As a child, Scout found himself last to fights and oftentimes had to watch from the sidelines as his brothers got to fight. And he didnt. He was too small. But being small had an advantage, he was able to run.

I've earned myself a reputation/ That my bark is much worse than my bite/ But I keep snapping at Goliath's hands/ With all of my tiny might

This first stanza summarizes Scout, I feel, quite well. Scout talks shit, he's small and can't follow up with the shit he talks, but he talks shit nonetheless.

Dress me in red and throw your roses/ And I'll rankle the beasts with words/ It's a graceless dance of epithets/ We learn to make someone hurt

Scout doesn't look all that scary, that unassuming, but he's tough as nails and despite being cowardly, will stand and help when needed.

All of the words I've swallowed/ All of the sharp things I've kept in my mouth/ I am always bleeding out

This lyric specifically highlights how sometimes words can be more cruel than actions. The mercs all throw insults while on the battlefield, but remember that Scout is the closest thing to a normal boy on that battlefield. He can take literal assassins and killers head on- despite being so young and "normal." We can assume that his sharp tongue would translate quite poorly in normal conversation as being surronded by the mercs sort of. Fucks up your personality.

I'll be the sweetest thing to ever scare you/ Give me a fight I can't resist/ Give me something to break with my fists/ Take me to war/ Oh, honey, I dare you

Scout is a sweet, welcoming small town Boston boy with a heart of gold. Underneath it all, is a violent and teasing killer who, much like his teammates, enjoys violence and hurting people. I feel like this is something that's underutilized when it comes to Scout. He's so young, has a family and future and yet is so easily turned to violence. Take Scout to War, he dares you.

SOLDIER - Little Soldiers

No, I didn't just choose the song because of the title. I struggled immensely when it came to Soldier. I had a general idea, going in, of what everyone's character song will be. With Soldier? The Crane Wives songs deal with deep character incatracies and such, Soldier lacks that, at least on the surface. This song, I feel, represents the friendship he has with RED Demo. His loyalty to his friend and his love for him. This song has the word love in it, but I want to avoid any shipping content in this analysis so it's accessible to everyone. Love can be platonic.

On the broken backs of all the words we spared/ Like little soldiers in the trenches/ It was a march we made towards ruin and despair/ But we held hands all the while

Being forced to kill your best friend over and over is difficult. Fighting, sparring, on the battlefield, yet close friends and confidants outside of it. Holding hands with someone who killed you, it's cruel in a way. For two friends to have to kill over and over. Yet, they continue this friendship despite it all.

Beneath the table you would offer up my bones/ And all the dogs would lick your fingers

How are you supposed to badmouth your best friend? He's supposed to be your enemy, offering up all the parts of your friend that hurts, and you have to be fine with everyone believing you hate him.

We didn't give up, we wouldn't dare surrender/ It was an honest loss

Despite the Administrator forcing them apart, they'd never surrender their loyality to one another. They're loyal to each other before her.

PYRO - Daydreamer

Like I said, I'm trying to stick to canon as much as possible. In canon, Pyro is not that... well, complex. I myself have many headcanons for them, but canon only. Daydreamer is a song about someone who gets stuck in their own head quite a bit, which suits Pyro and their Pyrovision.

Two steps forward and one step back/ I’ll take a one-way ticket anywhere/ It’s not over, this is only a setback/ We’ll just have to move a little bit faster now, faster now

Pyro is two steps forward, one step back. They do something amazing, then do something childish. They balance a fine line between absolutely insane and genius.

Daydreamer, you’re falling behind (falling behind, falling behind)/ I’ll get there in my own time

Pyro... isn't really sure nor is aware of what's going on. And you know what? It works for them. This one is far shorter than any other due to the length of the song being short and not having stuff to analyze as Pyro is rather simple. And sometimes simple is good.

DEMO - Keep you Safe

I knew I wanted to do this song as soon as I reread Demo's backstory. Keep you Safe is about waiting and regrets. One thing Demo is good at is waiting. Waiting for the perfect time to strike or waiting for his parents haha. Demo was abandoned as a kid, and was done so because he needed to hone his skills on his own. Honestly Demo had one of the worst childhoods, killing his parents and losing an eye is not an easy thing for any kid. No wonder he's an alcoholic.

When I was a child/ My nerves ran wild/ When I watched my friends/ Rise to the tops of the trees/ With the risk of fall I never climbed at all/ Every day I told myself “I’m not ready”

Demo felt safer creating bombs, he rather create than socialize. He was never ready. Demo had a shitty childhood and prefered to wait out the dangers instead of engage.

My daddy always said/ “Nothing worth doing comes easy”/ Time is not your friend/ Time is not your remedy

His parents believed in toughing it out. Believed in fighting and believed in working hard, to the point that it was borderline neglectful and absusive. (Again, abanonding your child so that he could find his skills on his own is fucked up). Demo learned the hard way the world is not kind, and sometimes you need to take action. This one is shorter, but I struggle a lot trying to talk about Demo without delving into my headcanon and personal intpretation too much. I'll cut this one short.

ENGINEER - Canary in a Coal Mine

I struggled A LOT with Engie. I reread all his story as much as I could but could not find a matching song, so I had to stretch this to fit quite a bit. Bear with me. I chose Canary in a Coal Mine because of his relationship with the Administrator, and how she would be just about dead without him.

You and I are friends of empty graves, black air and black, black lungs/ Am I the only thing that keeps you safe when the light is gone?

The Administrator is essentially an empty grave with black lungs, has been through a lot of shit. He is the only reason she is alive, he's and his knowledge is the only reason the war continues. Without Engie's ability to create, there wouldn't be anything. He's the only thing keeping her safe when the light is gone.

Feed me promises, keep my heart well/ I'll sing you songs until the darkness does recede

With promises of clearing his "old debt", he's willing to do whatever to feed his god complex. I apologize for the short one this is, I struggled heavily with him much like I did with Pyro.

HEAVY - Hard Sell

Heavy is the anchor in his family, he's always been a protector and always been the worker. When he was younger, maybe he wondered if things would get easier once he got bigger and stronger. Heavy uses his strength to protect by being violent.

I'm trying to make something of myself/ My better days, I go buy the hard sell/ But I feel like I'm working with barbed wire and moth wings/ 'Cause I can't really get a hold of many things.

Maybe as a child, Heavy had to put a lot of pressure on himself to grow. On Genius lyrics, a summary reads:

"The narrator is trying to improve themself in an aggressive matter, but they’re too rough on themselves, making them feel fragile. In being so hard on themselves, they feel like change is unobtainable."

What we do know about Heavy is this: Heavy has always had to fight and protect. He's probably had to grow up early, and he's tough on himself. To be stronger. To protect his sisters and family. He cares about them more than anything and is willing to push himself to do anything for them. This can also be interpreted in the sense that he works extraordinarily hard, physically, to protect people. Pushing himself past his bodily limits, as seen in End of the Line.

Is it me? Is it really just me?/ Does everybody have it together or are we all pretending?

I don't think Heavy is perfectly mentally sane, but he has to be essentially a calming anchor around him or they'd probably also fall apart. The rest of the song repeats mostly, but that's the reason I chose Hard Sell for Heavy.

MEDIC - Ribs

Medic is an interesting character to me. I knew I wanted to do this song due to the religious themes in it (as he talks to satan), and also because of the general themes of innards. KEEP IN MIND, THIS TALKS ABOUT THE AMORALITY OF MEDIC. I AM NOT SAYING HE DOESN'T CARE ABOUT HIS TEAM, HE DOES. But he is also amoral.

Marrow made a wife of Eve/ But no one gave up a rib for me and mine/ My hearts did expose to the elements/ Calloused and untouched by a man's design

Medic isn't a man of god, he's not pure or holy. He's untouched by morality and what is good or bad. He's pure, unadulterated curiousity and mania. His heart was exposed to what we can assume is the worst of humanity, and thus all morals were thrown out the window.

Oh, my ugly organs/ How lucky we are

Whereas one may pity Medic for his insanity and lack of moral compass, he sees this as an absolute win. He's lucky he's untouched by innocence.

Oh, my savage empire/ How lucky we are/ Never to be moved by the words of a liar

He's reinstating he's once again lucky for being a dealer with Satan rather than god. He knows God won't be able to give him what he wants, Satan? Satan can. Satan will. He will become immortal one way or another.

The dark doesn't frighten me/ I chose to close my eyes/ It is mine, it is mine/ The night doesn't frighten me/ I chose to let it thrive/ It is mine, it is mine

This lyric really is why I chose Ribs. The dark, evil and inhumane parts of himself is not something he chooses to hide, to close away and deny. He embraces that part of him that others may urge to hide. He is not afraid of his evil, Medic chooses it. Sometimes we forget how demented Medic is. He betrays everyone to join TFC, he brought Sniper back to life, he DECAPITATED BLU SPY AND LEFT HIM IN A FRIDGE WHILE ALIVE. Medic is evil, he's cruel and merciless but in a way that is so honest and open and endearing that exudes confidence and choice.

SNIPER - The Wolf

Sniper, I knew very early on as in media he's compared to a Wolf quite often, and the themes align well. Sniper struggles quite a bit with proving he's not a crazed gunman. That he's 100% sane and is rather a calculated killer. He's aware he's a bad person and sort of embraces it in a sort.

I am not a builder/ I’m much better at blowing things down

Sniper is a person who destroys. Destroys heads and lives specifically. He's aware of this and embraces it through his unconventional career choice.

I am not a tempest/ I light torches in my sleep/ I have gasoline in my veins/ I am always burning, burning, burning

Sniper is destructive, he's a controlled fire of sorts. A killer, but not an insane one but that intense passion he has for his job, seen through his voicelines, burn despite the controlled aspect.

I am a falling axe/ I am a sharpened knife/ I am a poison asp/ I am a risk to your life

Sniper is a highly dangerous man and a bad person, a wolf in sheeps clothing of sorts as he's not that dangerous looking. On the inside, he's a cold heartless killing machine, at least when he's on the job.

Can it be/ Can it be easy for once/ Cause I’m no good at being kind to myself/ Or anyone

This part will be making a few assumptions: we can guess that Sniper has some sort of insecurity as having your parents constantly berate you for your job probably stings. Especially when you love them more than anything. Wanting to crave that approval so so badly, yet struggling so much to connect with people as he's on the job 24/7. He's not kind to himself- or anyone else. He's a prowling beast looking for his next kill, not some schoolboy making friends.

A single video made me fall in love with Sniper as a character and its because of his relationship with his parents. It's eight years old but holds up to this day. Here.

SPY - Empty Page

This is the reason I made this post. Spy is, and will always be, a nobody person. He doesn't have a stable identity due to his career and even when telling his son that he is his father, he can't show his face. Being a spy has mental health repercussions when it comes to your identity, and this has always fascinated me about Spy.

I’m just a ten cent copy/ Of people far more advanced than me/ Every thought that I’ve ever had/ Could be ripped from a magazine

Instantly, you can tell why this song is Spy. Spy is a ten cent copy of people, he's a copycat, a liar. He literally steals the identity of people to play a role, he isn't a person. He's a blank canvas to LITERALLY project onto!

Cut me a path, and I will follow it/ Draw me a line, and I’ll avoid it/ I’m nothing if not obedient

Spy is an obedient worker who will do anything and everything he's told to... again. It's Spy.

I am an empty page/ A muddled shade of paint/ I am a light that’s burning out

Spy is an amalgamation of all the people he has had to be in the past, he is an empty page, he is a color of paint that in unique because he's people clipped together from magazines. Spy isn't a person, he doesn't even have a name. He is JUST. A. SPY.

Years of imitating mastery/ Only made me a better thief

Again. He's an imitation of people who he's needed to be. Despite him maybe being the main reason I made this post, this song is so straightforward and blatant in why it's Spy, I can't add a lot of commentary.

BONUS: SPY & SCOUT - Never Love an Anchor

Never Love an Anchor, despite the dozens of animatics and popular belief, is not about romance. It's about family. The romantic interpretation is so.. upsetting since the song literally cannot be romantic due to some lyrics but whatever. Anyways, Spy's POV to Scout. I know I said I would only highlight the important lyrics, but this one is a special case.

On some level, I think I always understood/ That these hands of mine were clumsy, not clever/ And I tried to do the best that I could/ But try as I might, I couldn't bring myself to hold you

Spy has hands meant for lockpicking and killing, not holding a child close and making a family. God did he love Scout, but he couldn't dare look his child in his face knowing that beneath the facade of a father, he was an empty shell. Spy has hands meant for murder, not creating.

It's a secret I keep tucked inside my chest/ With this heart of mine that's guilty, not remorseful/ There is love that doesn't have a place to rest/ But it would have buried you if it had settled on your shoulders

Spy will never tell Scout the truth. He cannot, will not or will ever be able to because of his cowardice and for Scout's safety. He doesn't regret leaving, he knows it was for the better, but god does he feel so much guilt and shame for leaving. For being a Spy. He would've gotten Scout and his family killed if he stayed with them, and he didn't want to have to bury his own child. If he loved, he'd hurt.

There are times when I still wonder about you/ You are someone I have loved, but never known/ And you'll never see the reasons I had/ For keeping my claws away when they were close enough to hurt you

He sees Scout everyday, seeing the son he never had become a boy strong and agile. He wants to know about Scout, he wants to be there, but can never tell him why he couldn't hold him. Why Spy had to leave.

I am selfish, I am broken, I am cruel, I am all the things they might have said to you/ Do you ever think of me and my two hands?/ And wonder why they never soothed your fevers?/ And wonder why they never tied your shoes?/ And wonder why they never held you gently?/ And wonder why they never had the chance to lose you?

Spy is a bad person, and he hoped Scout wouldn't end up the same. It's not too late for Scout to turn his life around. But Spy doesn't have that right— the right to act like a father. He never held Scout, never raised him, never took care of him, never taught him. Never helped him. He never had a chance to lose his son out of fear of losing him. It was a lose lose situation, but at least this way Scout isn't dead.

God. This song.

BONUS: PAULING & THE ADMINISTRATOR - The Moon Will Sing

The moon will sing a song for me/ I loved you like the sun/ Bore the shadows that you made/ With no light of my own/ I shine only with the light you gave me/ I shine only with the light you gave me

Pauling's entire being is centered about the Administrator and it's incredibly sick and codependant. Pauling is nothing without the woman who gave her everything, so she will have to work endlessly to make her happy, right?

Ending Thoughts

Woo! That was a long one. It took 5 days to write this all due to me rereading all the source medias several times. I hope you enjoyed this, please leave your thoughts on this. I like to reread the source medias of my fandoms at least once a year to refresh my headcanons and such. This was that.

[space-station-collective]

some of the less pretty parts of plurality

we talk a lot on this blog about the funny or nice parts of being plural, but there's also a lot of bad shit that can come with it. it's not all good, just like it's not all bad. it just is! sometimes, seeing posts like this makes us feel a little better, knowing we aren't alone in these struggles and seeing other people who have come through it, so, here's this

this is going to require a lot of me being vulnerable on the internet lmao

everything is going under a cut, and i'm marking applicable TW and CWs here as well as in the tags. i tried to keep it as light as possible (if there's any tags i missed, PLEASE do let me know and i'll add them ASAP /gen)

(this is also quite a long post, under the cut the word count is: 437)

WARNINGS: addiction mentions, physical illness, exotrauma mentions

-) developing an addiction/dependency that everyone has to manage, due to one headmate's actions

-) trying to collectively recover from addiction when not everyone wants to, and some headmates actively working against the progress and goals

-) more specifically, having to maintain a clean streak for everyone, not just one individual. not just yourself. we have an agreement- we stick together with this stuff

-) headmates who actively dislike people we know, and generally collectively like, and having to manage and ignore secondhand emotions towards those people when the headmates in question are around (not to say, ignoring how those headmates feel about people, but moreso not letting the emotions bleed through into our own interactions)

-) panicking because your job directly relates to helping other headmates, and despite your best efforts, things keep getting worse (not directly applicable to me who is writing this -host)

-) having to agree with headmates, who have done nothing wrong, that they can't be around front, because they're symptom holders, and the body is ill enough all the time that we physically can't handle them fronting

-) fighting. constant fighting. i can't think of a day since our syscovery that there hasn't been some sort of fight, argument, breakdown, violence, some sort of incident internally

-) so many headmates with so much exotrauma. some of their triggers have bled into our collective triggers, and holy shit is it hard to explain thost to people who don't understand exomemories, or even who don't know about the system

-) having to watch littles who are far too young for any of this experience this whole ordeal

-) "Atlantis" by Seafret. it's about an extremely different topic, but the lyrics hit home. "i can't save us, my atlantis, we fall. we built this town on shaky ground." because holy fuck, it feels that way sometimes

several of these things are now managed, several are not. being human is a weird, messy, fucked up experience, and when you shove a bunch of consciousnesses into one human body, it gets even more convoluted

whoever you are, whatever reason you might have for reading this: i love you. you are not alone in your struggles. you have support from so many places, and you will get through whatever you're currently experiencing, be it so simple as your favourite pencil breaking, all the way to personal tragedy. you are loved

-the host (he/they), expressing thoughts of the collective

(scheduling this to post outside of the queue because our content is usually much more lighthearted than this and i don't want to take up a spot for that)

[iolypse]

primarily english speaking qsmp members as D&D characters because I can't help but fuse both of my current fixations together

Philza — species for this one was tricky, class and subclass a little harder, but I ultimately decided on aasimar ranger (horizon walker). kept trying to pick between aasimar and air genasi, almost put air genasi because I felt like qfoolish fit aasimar better, but they can both be aasimar it's fine. by the time I finish writing this, foolish might not even be an aasimar anymore, im still thinking. regardless, qphil has always been a bit of a tactician and a bowman, hasnt he? classic traits of a ranger. from there, it felt like horizon walker was the only subclass that fit. protecting from otherworldly threats, preserving life and other planes. yeppp sounds like this paranoid motherfucker right here.

BadBoyHalo — now that's a tiefling if I've ever seen one. class is a little more complicated. I've deliberated between paladin and warlock before eventually settling on paladin, making him a tiefling paladin (ancients). I don't have to explain the tiefling part (have you seen his everything?), but the paladin part could use it. we're yet to really see qbad make any real deals with any powerful forces, so that took out the warlock part for me. I wanted to make sure he had at least a little bit of magic though (c'mon), so I immediately went to paladin, and it worked out. he's a dedicated man! he'll make a promise and he'll fuckin stick to it. I debated between devotion and ancients after that, but devotion tends to have a more lawful side, which ended with me choosing ancients. they fight the darkness because they love life, plain and simple, and you're dull if you can't see how much this dude loves life.

FitMC — alright, I'm sorry, I had to do it, but this is a human fighter (rune knight) right here. I simply couldnt see him as anything other than human, and rogue and artificer didn't fit since there's other characters that fit those classes so much better, so fighter it was. still, qfit has a lot of cool gadgets and bits and bobs, and I wanted to recognize that in this adaptation of him, so I decided to show that through the rune knight subclass. rune knight fighters can do a lot of cool shit with their runes, enhancing pretty much anything they put their mind to. probably some shit he found scrawled in the horrors of 2b2t and decided to study.

Foolish — this one was hard! the fuck is this guy? I instinctively thought aasimar, but I already made qphil an aasimar, so I played around with different types of genasi and then goliaths, even minotaurs just trying to find something that fit the semi-inhuman sorta innately magical, physically strong being vibes. I think aasimar fit best, so then it was a matter of class. hes a builder! he builds shit. that's what qfoolish does. but he is NOT a mechanic and therefore not an artificer, not musical enough to be a bard, not angry enough to be a barbarian, so what the fuck is he? took a LOT of fucking around, but eventually I remembered the college of creation exists, and I felt it fit well enough, making him an aasimar bard (creation). he draws his power from his builds— he inspires with sight, not song. it's a unique take on a bard, but I've seen some awesome chef bards, so I think this works just fine. he's an architect bard.

Slimecicle — this one was FUN. 100% that's a fucking plasmoid. he's a goopy guy! then I experimented with different bard and rogue classes, thought maybe warlock for his deal with demon rubius, and then decided i couldn't disrespect the juanaflippa song and said fuck it, he can be a bard. again in correlation with the song, I went with valor, since he's telling her great story through the lyrics, keeping her memory alive with it. I DID consider spirits, however, since he actually managed to bring juanaflippa back, however briefly. still, I felt valor fit the bill just a little better. he's a plasmoid bard (valor).

JaidenAnimations — ohhh this one took some thought. I wanted her to be fairly humanoid while still having some subtle unusual traits, and elf was considered but it felt too regal. I almost considered kenku for how she tends to repeat what other people say, but it wasn't right. thought I'd try something a little strange, and I ended up with shifter! specifically wildhunt. class was just as difficult— she wasnt going to be any primarily martial classes, so that cut out a bunch, and she's not really faithful or super devoted, so that took out paladin, warlock, and cleric, and eventually I narrowed it down to sorcerer, picking aberrant mind for their mystery and influence on others. being the only woman in an island full of gay twinks is tough, man. she's a shifter sorcerer (aberrant mind).

Wilbur — half-elf bard (eloquence). this one came pretty quick to me, actually. the bard part is more than obvious, subclass picked for the number of times qwilbur's casually convinced other people to just go with the bit. he's a man of words, and he weaves them well. he can be damn persuasive, mixing in genuine arguments with small white lies, all while playing your heart strings just right. half-elf is almost entirely vibes honestly— human was too bland, elf too spicy, so we met in the middle.

DanTDM — this dude's been gone since the very fucking beginning pretty much. I almost want to make him a rogue just for that, but man, he's the diamond minecart, alright? I grew up watching him. it'd be a disservice not to make him an artificer. from there, alchemist best suited the vibes, since he never really did much of anything machinery-related. he is a human artificer (alchemist).

[misc-obeyme]

HI HELLO IM BACK, I HAVE MY NOTES WHEEE. I had to go back and re-read where i left off. ajsjd idk if anyone else is waiting for updates on my silly little poly story but here is the next part

I mention this diner that's open, and Solomon cuts in like "That's right, didn't you say they had the best cake batter milkshake you've ever had? And I recall you gushing about the food, specifically the mozzarella sticks." "It's the same one ya showed the menu off to us and how they had 20 something flavors, ain't it?" "And Mammon, you wanted to try the cinnamon one, right?" *Cue Mammon looking perplexed*"Sol, wha... Yeah, I-I mean, how the hell did you remember that? I said it so long ago.." "It's easy to remember the things my favorite people enjoy. :]"

How to make two people tsunderes short circuit 101. I'd like to think this is the realization for both me and Mammon about Solomon. Mammon does his little scoff and tries to play it off and it backfires, "So what you're sayin' is, I'm always on your mind?" "Hm. Yes. That feels accurate." "EH?!?" Meanwhile, I'm definitely trying to tamp down the feeling and shove it in a box.

Basically Mammon is "Oh. Oh." and I am "Oh. Oh. Aw, fuck."

okay but Mammon drives us to the diner and we sit in a booth, and they're sitting on the same side and we each other a milkshake and fries to share !! Mammon takes a fry, throws it in the air, and catches it in his mouth. Unfortunately it's hot as hell since it's fresh so he's fanning his mouth and dying internally, peak dumbass. Solomon and I can't help but laugh, and I find myself laughing a little too hard and oh. There's this realization that feels like a cold bucket of water and I'm all "Oh. Oh.. Oh, shit." because HELLO? WHY CAN I FEEL THE FONDNESS IN MY OWN GAZE WHEN I LOOK AT THESE TWO DORKS, MY FACE FEELS HOT, AAAA.

I immediately rip open my straw and focus on my milkshake, trying to convince myself I'm in a silly goofy mood. And idk why, but I can't stand cherries. Cherry flavored things? Awesome. Cherries? No. So i end up placing the cherry on a napkin but I keep the stem (you know where this is going). Solomon sneakily takes the cherry, as Mammon is already sipping his cinnamon shake (definitely horchata flavored).

Solomon pops the it into his mouth at the same time I present the cherry stem now tied into a knot on the tip of my tongue, and suddenly both of them are flustered and choking. (I've only been able to do this once irl, BUT I CAN SAY I'VE DONE IT)

Anyway I'm stuck between laughing so hard I snort, and reaching my hands out towards them both across the table in concern. I try calming myself down, but one look at their red cheeks and I'm a mess again. I think Mammon would flick me on the forehead and say something about my milkshake melting if I don't stop giggling. We end up leaving slightly after 2 am.

We're all in the car, Mammon is driving along the highway. Stars are out, windows down, and the radio is blasting. And then fall out boy comes on !! Because when that band plays, I turn into a different person.

Of course I'm giddy as hell, and Mammon even reaches over to turn it up. You know what's playing? Favorite Record (that just feels like such a fitting song). Mammon and Solomon's eyes meet in the mirror, and there's no words spoken, but everything was said. Because Mammon said he was just playing stuff from his liked songs. Which means, he either lied and made a playlist for tonight OR he started listening to them because I enjoy them so much (it's the second reason)

And in the beginning, I was kinda humming and mumbling the lyrics as I progressively get more confident. But when it got near the chorus, I can't help myself. Suddenly I'm happily singing along, loud and unashamed.

Mammon feels his heart stutter. The roads are empty, so he sneaks a glance at me. And he wonders if this is love, or the beginnings. Because oh. Oh. He's never seen me so carefree. This is his realization moment. And he vows to get to know more songs if it means having another moment like this. Solomon is in the backseat, recording because he's never seen me so energetic before (unless I was gushing about an interest, but there's still a sense of hesitation when I do). Don't mind him, he's making a mental note to google karaoke clubs.

I'm partly embarrassed when the song ends, but no one says anything, so I calm down pretty quickly. It's not long before we arrive at Mammon's apartment/shop. Solomon and I grab our things from the trunk, and follow Mammon inside.

okay that's it for now !! sleepover is next !! i think playlist drama comes after ?? I can't remember. This got long ajsjd. Also I'm making an outline of the songfic, so the bullying kinda worked. I was daydreaming about it on the bus. It WAS gonna be a Mammon pov thing about my mc or maybe reader, but now I'm like 🤨 what if... solomams.... the lyrics fit more for them together... I could write two fics but they'd be basically the same with minor differences. Hmm. Who knows. We'll see. Also my friend/coworker made me some decorations to put on my bag that were solomon and mammon inspired 😭 so sweet. OKAY BYEEE I'M FR DONE NOW AJSJD

- ✨ anon

Ahhhhh Solomon flirting with you two is the cutest thing EVER.

Also who do I have to kill to get a horchata flavored milkshake?? Because that sounds like the most delicious thing I've ever heard of in my life.

I am LIVING for these realization moments!! You singing your heart out to one of your favorite songs a;ldskjfljkdfjkdf

This is so cute I'm dying! I don't know about everybody else, but I am fully invested in this story and I will not be satisfied until I know how the whole thing goes!!

You've fully converted me into a solomams shipper, too, by the way. It's because I just LOVE the way Solomon teases Mammon in a flirty way, that is seriously so cute! But I gotta say, it's even better with your MC involved...

I await the sleepover with baited breath!

[acatinafancyhat]

Watched Chess Netherlands today because... well, I can 🙃 It was surprisingly not all horrible. Definitely flawed and problematic but it had some parts I really liked! Of course I had lots of thoughts again so here is me venting them. 99% sure no one else cares about Dutch Chess but what the hell, tumblr is for screaming into the void right? ✨️

Act I

- You can instantly tell this is a Dutch production because the championships take place in what looks like a school gym. I mean we do our rubiks cube tournaments there. Is fine for chess, no?

- Explaining chess to the audience bc that's what the show is really missing

- Many Svenska Vibes

- Anatoly with an i is the most Dutch Soviet Russian i've ever met. Just, no nonsense. 'go take care of my children woman.' Calling each other names is how we show affection <3

- I will say the boys (Anatoli's kids) playing chess during the opening is a nice touch

- Story of Chess also has very to the point lyrics. "chess requires reticence so u don't kill each other" see now this actually sets up the show real well :)

- Awkward humor no one laughs at ✅️

- Anatoli's kind of a downer

- Freddie's sort of charming but his relationship with Florence is gonna be garbage i can tell

- strike 1: ableism

- (honestly he just reminds me of every Dutch white guy on tv)

- strike 2: assault

- Florence is already so done with his shit good for her

- also "with me there, he is brilliant" tru tru

- Singing Nobody's Side while random people have a lil party behind her?

- oh it's an excuse for karaoke ONIB

-Are they really gonna do the whole song though do we really need that

-lol Freddie pushes karaoke guy off stage so he can finish the song. honey this is a little early in the show to be getting this drunk what are you doing she hasn't even left you yet

- Arbiter leads morning exercise... ok well why not

- No dancing during the chess game. It's cool we can just watch two guys play chess from a distance for a couple minutes. Fun times.

- Freddie sticks his gum under the table real subtle like he hasn't got multiple cameras pointed at him right now

- Actually on second thought i think the chess game might be better without the dancing. Characters are doing interesting things. The contrast between Anatoli sitting stiffly at the table while Freddie is prancing around fistfighting the cameras is Most Amusing :)

- Did he just try to make Anatoli's move for him omg 🤣

- Freddie @ arbiter "uh it might be time u keep things under control around here" and off he runs HE'S SUCH A LITTLE SHIT ngl i kinda love him here

- However Florence's defense of him just seems completely unreasonable considering toli literally just. sat there. the whole time.

- Anatolyi gets the 'i'm ridiculous' monologue like in Svenska

- 'Hey my people killed your people oops now let me sing a song in the language you probably don't remember and it's somehow romantic and not creepy or overstepping any boundaries at all :)'

- Running away from Molokov in a shittier version of Svenska. Meh. But again they are aware of the lack of embassies in and around Merano which I do appreciate bc i'm pedantic like that

- Freddie: hey what's she doing with that Russian

Freddie: hmmm idk

Freddie: they're definitely talking abt me tho 🤨

- Flo & toli have a healthy conversation about the fact that he just left his kids behind i support that!!

- However this timing/setting for Anthem sucks. He's just singing it to Florence. And it's literally about how he misses his family? Weak. This needs to be an epic declaration of love for his homeland to all the world not whining to your girlfriend. Ugh can't believe they fucking ruined Anthem!

- So far all of this strikes me as discount Svenska but without the investment in Flonatoly and the only thing it's really got going for it is a handful of good lines BUT we'll see about act 2...

Act II

- Why the fuck would you start your second act with Merchandisers?

- Nice audience interaction though, it doesn't completely not work

- But following it up with Heaven Help My Heart is hmmmmmm really not ideal pacing-wise.

- Freddie's woman verse is even more cringe in Dutch i can't accurately translate it but it's so..... yikes..... The word he uses instead of "woman" ("popje") literally means "little doll/puppet" (but with slightly different connotations). It's sometimes used as a term of endearment but in this scene it is very much derogatory and ew.

- "here I stand wondering / if I ever knew you / have I ever really known who you are?" I like this translation!

- Pity the Child pulls no punches (does it ever?) He's so pathetic, he's such an asshole, and as a teacher I weirdly feel this one (at one point he talks about how no one ever noticed him at school either and just... oof don't get me started). Also the desperate rapid-fire chess game he plays against himself in the musical break and during the final verse--that needs to be in more versions holy fuck go watch this bit it's GOOD!!

- The Deal but without a political angle. Fascinating.

- No

- no. no no no i hate this i hate this Freddie wouldn't sacrifice his game not even for Florence NO. CANCELED.

- Interestingly instead of honey/parner, Freddie uses the same word as in the woman verse when he's talking to Florence during The Deal but this time it's the endearment variant. That's a little bit problematic.

- Molokov's plan is still to bring Flo and Sveta together even though Anatoli is now supposed to win 🤷‍♂️

- Anatoli casually downs several shots of liquor (vodka?) during Soviet Machine. not sure this will help him win the game but at least he sleeps through Russian Guy screaming that final whoooooooo high note in his ear

- Florence tests Freddie's chair... demands they bring a different one... is she still working for him? idk. I'm guessing it's meant to be sweet but it just looks silly to me idk

- Fuck reverse I Know Him So Well honestly. "he wants me / no he wants me" boo fucking hoo. You two deserve each other.

- Oh! Oh! Talking Chess, yay! 😁

- Gosh this is actually really cute?!? Freddie literally just came to discuss this random chess gambit he came across and thought was interesting? Nothing even to do with their current game just 'hey found this thing i thought you might like and i like and can we be friends now i really like chess 😶'

- Unlike in Svenska and RAH, I actually don't know for sure who is going to win this game. They do a good job of making this really about chess in the end. I like it.

- Freddie reminding toli it's about chess even during their match now that is the freddie i came to see!

- He calmly sips his water as Sveta and Florence are physically removed from the premises

- It is Quite Unfortunate that this production hates women...

- Really they seem to only be here to get in the men's way. Ugh.

- I don't support any of the relationships except Freddie and Toli being pen pals and playing long distance chess for the rest of their lives.

- Ending feels a little OOC but still nice to see some healthy Freddie & Flo interaction for once 😌

tldr; not the worst production out there, worth watching if you've already seen Svenska and don't mind Freddie being the most likeable character. (okay likeable is not the right word he sucks but, you know. He reminds me of RAH Freddie but slightly more yike.) PTC and Talking Chess are highlights!

[talentforlying]

@handgiven: ♬♬♬ THREE songs??? 👀 — SONGS I LOVE

bite the hand - boygenius! this one punched me in the head last month and has not let me go since. it's very much a summary of constantine's attitude towards love and kindness in general; he wants it, craves it, but he's learned to keep his fangs out to survive, and that often means he snaps at someone who doesn't deserve it. this song always makes me think of his sister, especially, and i've sort of assigned it his mourning song for her. she let him in time and time again, gave him a respite from the darkness and a family to be part of, and he repaid her by getting her killed and failing to save her. even though she made the choice to stay in hell, he'll always feel responsible, and she's still always the one he reaches to in his lowest hours, even knowing she's no longer there.

i can't hear you, you're too far away / i can't see you, the light is in my face / i can't touch you, i wouldn't if I could / i can't love you how you want me to

sweet as whole - sara bareilles! one of my earliest constantine anthems, and a great summary of how he generally views the world and brushes off all the terrible things he sees and has happen to him. people suck, and shit happens! that guy's an asshole, that girl's a bitch, he's a bitch, fuck it all and let it go! it's very much a song that he and his friends would belt out if they weren't bound by the laws of toxic masculinity to not know who the hell sara bareilles is, i promise you that. it also provides an excellent reason for why he talks so much shit:

and i hate to think that i ruined the day / of the dick and the queen of the high horse parade / but i'm sick and tired of your poisonous ways / your toxin wasting perfectly good space / and i say what i think / 'cause it's more economic than drugs or a drink

unraveling - the crane wives! if you can't tell already, the crane wives are one of my favorite bands of all time, and this one is the current emotional arc of my current dnd character. in this case, though, i am hitting you directly with the constantine-after-em-falls stick, because GOD!! the survival of faith in a different form, but having to adjust to that change, to mourn the loss of the sapling before you can appreciate the new growth? the tailor + gardener + carpenter examples when we've already talked about how they're both so good with their hands? "my love" as in the unconditional holy love that angel em gives to constantine? the lyric "i never knew i needed you" and the way it's drawn out with such bewildered wonder? my head is actively in my hands.

i once loved a gardener with his dirt-smudged face and hands / trimmed my weeds and gave me room to grow my flowers again / but now my love is gone / and i am left here withering

^ constantine as the garden, struggling to survive being repotted after poisoning his own soil (breaking em's halo)

i once loved a carpenter who carved a smile for me / sanded my rough edges, crafted new and lovely things / but now my love is gone / and i can’t help the fracturing

^ em as the clay, losing his divinity, the unconditional love of god / heaven, and his halo to constantine's hands and having to rebuild

+ 3 songs for em: oh my GOD for fallen em, prayer - ghost quartet, one of my FAVORITE songs in the world from one of my FAVORITE shows / performances!! if you have not looked up the mckittrick performance of ghost quartet, i SO recommend it!! it's also one of my favorites for constantine, but i feel like it just sits so well around the concept of a former angel struggling to adjust to being part of the material world he'd floated through previously, and all that you've talked about em dissociating and struggling to afford himself the same forgiveness he gives so freely to others.

i will try to forgive myself / for living in the dark / for my loss of wonder / for forgetting how to play i will try to forgive myself / for being absent in public / and bored before stars for not remembering / for not being in my body / for not starting right now i will try / to see myself as i am

and while i'm on my crane wives shit, icarus - the crane wives, also my beloved!! i don't even have anything i can say about this one, just look at these fucking lyrics:

oh my brother, my brother, my brother / who have you become in the wake of all that's happened here? they're burning down the orchard to the soil / to the soil, to the grave / spreading out the ashes of a love that only gave and gave . . . it's okay, it's okay / my love will fall with grace

finally, polite and good - secret pie has a very otherworldly em vibe for me, it's very much got a just-outside-of-humanity-playing-human sound to it and the lyrics are spot on with "your tea and your cat". it feels like if em's apartment was just slightly a horror movie in a way, which, with all that biblically accurate angel business, it could be at just the right angle.

don't mind what you see in the mirror / don't mind the shadows that knock at your door / i'll be right here, unchanging sincere / i will be Polite and Good

[frogmanfae]

Newsies as things that happened at band camp part 7

Jojo: Why do you have a tub of Vaseline?

Elmer: It's Buttons's I'm babysitting during the parade block

Jojo: ...what-

Elmer: Its name is Velociraptor

Crutchie: So remember that girl who told Jack he's her second choice?

Davey: Yeah?

Crutchie: Yeah he went after toxic girl and now he's sad

Davey: Damn it

Romeo: I was famous on wattpad for like 2 years and then they took all them down and I sent email after email to get them to put it back up to no avail! My books had like 100k reads!

Davey: *silently has 500k reads on his wattpad books and people are still reading them despite not updating anything in over a year because he transferred to ao3 and completely abandoned all of his wattpad book ideas*

Jack: *sticks his hand in Davey's drum while hes wearing it*

Davey: ...Thats violating-

Davey: *going through the band room like a tornado knocking shit down with his drums* First lesson of quadding, if you knock it down that's their problem

Albert: In sixth grade I wrote my narrative writing to be like a whole notebook thick and it was actually just a FNAF novel that turned out to be canonically accurate, for some fucking reason

Albert: *asks Spot to play something on his snare*

Spot: *plays it*

Albert: Okay that's like I thought

Spot: *keeps playing*

Albert: Okay you can stop

Spot: *keeps playing*

Albert: Please it's 8:30 am

Jojo: How is summer almost over

Specs: Shhh

Jojo: We don't even get 104 days of it. Where the fuck do Phineas and Ferb go?

Race: There's nothing fresh about those air fresheners on your drum they've been there since before freshman year

Spot: leave them alone! They're vintage!

Jack: Those saw the declaration of independence get signed

Race: He got them way over four score and seven years ago

Davey: That class roster is the nightmare blunt rotation if I've ever seen it

Jack: I'd smoke a joint with them. Would I be happy? Probably not. But I'd still do it

Race: This might be the ADHD or the potential autism but have you ever thought about how colors aren't real?

Albert: Please stop it is 8:45 am

Denton: If we had to do push ups every time we made a mistake we'd have a BUFF band... Love you guys

Sarah: At least you have a chair

Davey: I do not??

Sarah: You have a drum

Davey: Thats not a chair!

Sarah: Don't you sit on it?

Davey: ...Occasionally

Spot: We should just sit on our drums in protest

Davey: Yeah! Just like those... Um... The things...

Spot: ...Sit ins?

Davey: Yes! Those!! I'm on new medication I can't-

Jack: Got a secret

Jack: Can ya keep it

Jack: Takin this one to the grave

Jack: Better lock it

Jack: In your pocket

Crutchie: It's not even 9:45 in the goddamn morning shut the fuck up

Race and Elmer: *saying the lyrics of Posituvity from the Little Mermaid Broadway show like it's slam poetry*

Race: *at the football team* look they all got fat booties

Romeo: Girls if you don't have a date to homecoming, hit me up. Cuz I'm the bomb dot com

Buttons: *about a peanut m&m on the stairs* thats a hazard

Spot: I am going to stick my foot so far up all 3 of your asses-

Race: Ew you got the root beer popsicle?

Albert: What's wrong with root beer?

Buttons: It's root beer!

Race: It's inferior to frooty flavors!

Albert: Oh of course YOU would think that

Race: call me a fag why don't ya

Elmer: *licks popsicle* Ewww...

Buttons: Why'd you get root beer??

Elmer: *crying* I thought it was chocolate!

Jack: Oh so i was looking at pictures of my family and apparently my great grandfather, my dads grandfather on his dad's side, we WHITE. Like WHITE white. Like, blonde hair blue eyes, Hitler's wet dream-

Race: so what happened to you?

Jack: I'm thinkin he had an affair with your great grandma or somethin cuz he sure as hell ain't related to me

Albert: all the Reddit people went to tumblr

Jack: Whats tumblr?

Race: That one cite that banned porn and then everyone got mad and moved to twitter

Davey: And then everyone got mad at Twitter and moved back to tumblr

Spot: *angrily* I just got called a freshman

Race: Ha loser-

Spot: *punches him*

Albert, Race, Elmer, Spot, Sarah, Katherine, Jack, Davey, and Crutchie: *sitting in a circle around the stairs*

Buttons, trying to get up the stairs: what are you-

Albert and Race: *locking freshman in the practice rooms*

Elmer: *the freshman locked in the practice room*

Finch: *looks at Elmer through the window and just shakes his head and keeps walking*

Elmer: *presses his hand against the glass sadly*

Sarah: In the best possible way, your shirt is giving Monster High

Race: Coming from a queer woman, thats the best thing I could have heard, thank you

Denton: You're starting to sound like sick cats at measure 27 *Sick cat imitation*

Denton: Okay flutes and clarinets measure 34

Elmer and Specs: *whines of absolute suffering*

Denton: *clap clap clap clap* *pause* horns up! Sorry I was late, thats on me

Albert: He's finishing his donuts!

Denton: Hey! That is an orange peanut butter cracker!

Albert: Oh my b my b

Race: Do you have tape

Denton: ...Why?

Race: My trombone broke

Denton: how did your- *sighs* yeah. I have tape.

Finch: they're performing open valve surgery

Buttons: Oh my God is everything okay??

Finch: Trumpet valve, not heart valve.

Davey: *drops drumstick and stares at it defeatedly for 15 seconds before picking it up*

Katherine: That thing ran on miracles and duct tape

Jack: *starts playing Mary Had a Little Lamb on the quads (the beginning to a certain drum cadence)*

Spot: NO!

Davey: SHUT UP

Davey: SHUT THE FUCK UP

Albert: STOP

Race: The gray hairs come in and it's just game over

Spot: No random tapping, drums. NO RANDOM TAPPING, DRUMS!

Denton: ...do you want to play Jig II? It's your call, youre the one who has to play the solo in it

Davey: I don't really care

Denton: Alright let's play it then

Davey: UGHHHHH *sobbing*

Race: Popsicles are probably the #1 food to eat seductively

Romeo: Thats funny because I was reading a fic one time and the one guy was about to suck the other guys dick but he had never sucked dick before so he just looked at it and went "... Like a popsicle?"

Race: Why the fuck are you reading that kind of- aren't you asexual??