#It's overwhelming I don't like it I don't like it I don't like it
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Daily "avoiding hopelessness" checklist
Hey, friends. I know I've been really struggling to look towards the future with any kind of hope, so here are some little things I've been trying to do every day that might help you, too.
Accept that your productivity might look weird right now. Don't expect yourself to act as if nothing is wrong.
Make art. I try to write something every day, even if I don't really feel like it, and I've found that once I get into it, I'm grateful I did.
Do something to plan for the future. Doesn't have to be big. Even getting some ice cream you know future you will thank you for counts.
Eat. Even if you're not hungry. I keep skipping meals because I don't feel like eating, and then I force myself to make something and realize I was absolutely starving.
Clean up one thing in your space. If doing all the dishes and sweeping the floors and putting away laundry all feel too overwhelming, try just doing one of those things.
Lean on your online and offline communities. I live in a county that voted trump by a margin of eighty percent. My world feels scary and hostile right now, and it's my communities that are helping me feel hopeful.
Try to find one thing that feels normal. One thing that feels safe and normal and helps you feel a bit more grounded. My local grocery store just got their shipment of chocolate oranges in for the season. That's my thing.
Try to find one thing to look forward to, no matter how small. My thing is checking my ao3 inbox for comments on my fics.
Love you all <3
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vanteguccir · 3 days ago
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── ୨୧ ! TOO MUCH
chris sturniolo x reader
SUMMARY: Where Matt and Nick say some hurtful things to Chris during a fight, bringing his insecurities to life and causing him to turn to his anchor, Y/N.
WARNING: Insecurities, fighting, crying, anxiety attack.
REQUESTED?: Yes, by anon.
AUTHOR'S NOTE: That is my work, I DON'T authorize any plagiarism, copy, or "inspiration"! | English isn't my first language, so I'm sorry if there's any grammar error.
   ༻✦༺  ༻✧༺ ༻✦༺
The noise in the living room had escalated from playful teasing in front of the camera to sharp, biting words. Chris stood behind the kitchen table, his hands clenched into fists at his sides as he glared at Matt and Nick, who were both looking at him from the other side of the table with expressions caught between frustration and exasperation.
"Do you ever think before you act, Chris?" Matt's voice was, surprisingly, raised, an edge of impatience in his tone. "We can’t get through one day without you doing something childish and making a scene, or worse, making our videos look like shit because of it!"
Chris’s jaw tightened, but he didn’t respond immediately, his eyes darting between his brothers, trying to make sense of how things had gotten so out of hand.
"I wasn’t trying to do anything." He muttered finally, his voice barely above a whisper laced with hurt. "I was just... being myself."
"Yeah, exactly." Nick jumped in, crossing his arms tightly over his chest. "And that’s the problem. You’re always yelling and doing the most, Chris. It’s just... exhausting, okay?"
Chris clenched his fists, jaw tight as he glared at Nick, feeling himself crumbling a bit because sure, he’s too much. Sure, he speaks too loud and had opinions about everything and wasn’t afraid to share them, even if they were about the silliest things. Sure, he feels cornered and childish and immature and annoying, and most of what they're saying is probably true, but hearing his own brothers say it out loud... it pains his heart.
"You know, that’s actually rich coming from you." He shot back, his voice carrying a frustration he couldn’t hold back, trying to disguise his pain with anger. "You’re always the first to say that people watch us because we’re different, because even though we look the same, we're still different. But all you ever do is complain that I’m not just like you or Matt!”
Nick’s expression shifted, taken aback by Chris’s words. But Nick wasn’t one to back down, his voice snapping back almost before Chris had finished speaking.
"That’s not what I’m saying at all!" He fired, eyes narrowing. "Is it so insane to want you to stop yelling and acting like a literal child in every video? We’re trying to be professional, Chris! People like us, yeah, but they won’t if you keep acting like-"
Chris dragged a hand over his face, pressing the heel of his palm into his forehead, trying to shut out Nick’s words, trying to drown out the overwhelming feeling of being misunderstood.
"... and we can’t keep dealing with it, Chris. Grow the fuck up."
The youngest felt his chest tighten even more. His greatest insecurity - one that clawed at his chest every night when he couldn’t sleep, when the silence around him became deafening - was now on full display, brutally brought to life by the people he trusted most.
The internet was relentless in labeling him as "the weird one", the "annoying triplet", just because he was loud and talked too much, just because he was unapologetically himself. He’d laugh it off, of course, joke about it even because it was easier to pretend it didn’t bother him. But deep down, those words haunted him, scraping at the edges of his self-worth, making him wonder if maybe, just maybe, he wasn’t enough.
And now, hearing Matt and Nick throw those same words at him... he felt hollow. Like all the air had been knocked from his lungs. They knew. They knew how those comments got to him, how hard he tried to ignore it, to rise above the criticism.
"Fine." He said bitterly, hating how his voice trembled slightly as he struggled to keep his emotions in check. "I’ll get out of your way, then."
He pushed his weight off of the table, preparing himself to get out of there, but as Chris stormed away, Nick's frustration boiled over, and he turned to Matt, his voice sharp and incredulous.
"Are you fucking kidding me?" He hissed, his eyes flashing with a mixture of anger and disbelief.
But Chris kept walking, his shoulders tense as he made his way to the stairs, refusing to let himself look back. His brothers’ voices felt like static at this point, blending into the background as he forced himself to keep going.
Behind him, Matt muttered under his breath, an edge of impatience creeping in.
"Why is he being so dramatic?" He called, exasperation evident in his tone. "Chris, just come back, man! Let’s finish this video."
But Chris didn’t even slow down. Each word felt like salt in a wound he was struggling to ignore, a constant reminder that he wasn’t on the same level as them, that they were all looking at him like he was the problem.
Maybe he was.
As he went down the stairs, his mind was racing, every emotion simmering just below the surface.
His hands trembled slightly as he reached his bedroom door, a mix of anger, shame, and sadness twisting in his chest, his breath hitching as he struggled to keep it together. He wanted to scream, to push all the hurt away.
Finally, he opened the door and stepped inside.
Y/N - curled up on his bed with notebooks spread around her and laptop balanced on her knees - looked up instantly, a huge smile spreading across her face as she noticed him, her expression so genuinely happy to see him that it made his heart ache even more.
"Hi, honey! How was filming?" She greeted brightly, unaware of the turmoil written across his face.
But her smile faltered quickly as she took in his red-rimmed eyes, the way his face seemed almost haunted, his body tense and trembling as he stood frozen in the doorway. She blinked, worry flashing across her features.
"Chris? Hey, what happened?" The girl whispered, and her words were like a lifeline, breaking the dam he’d tried so hard to keep in place.
She was quick in put her work together, placing her notebooks and laptop gently onto the floor beside her, leaving it all opened for her to come back to it later, her arms instinctively opening up to him.
"Come here, baby."
Without another thought, Chris crossed the room and collapsed into her open arms, sinking onto the bed as if the weight of the world had become too much for him to bear alone.
His arms wrapped tightly around her waist, his face burrowing into her shoulder as if he could somehow hide from everything that had been clawing at him. His legs slid between her thighs, his body curling into hers, every part of him drawn in close, seeking refuge in the only place that felt safe.
Y/N didn’t say anything at first. She could feel the way his shoulders shook, the silent sobs racking through him as he tried to hold back, his breath catching painfully against her neck. She held him even tighter, her hands slipping up to cradle the back of his head, her fingers threading gently through his fluff hair as she pressed soft, reassuring kisses to his forehead, his temple, anywhere she could reach.
"Shh... It’s okay, sweetheart." She murmured softly, pressing her lips to his line of hair. "I'm here. You're safe. Just breathe, Chris. Just breathe, baby."
But Chris felt anything but safe in his own skin. Shame and hurt twisted inside him, tightening like a vice around his chest. He tried to fold himself even smaller, curling tighter into her, trying to somehow look smaller for a 5'8 grown man, pressing his body as close to hers as he could.
He wanted to disappear, to melt into her embrace, and let the world live freely without his presence. The words Matt and Nick had thrown at him - the very same words he read online, the labels he was used to brushing off - felt so true, so much a part of him that he couldn’t deny them.
Childish. Annoying. Immature.
He hated himself in that moment, hated how much he cared, hated how the words dug under his skin, making him feel unworthy, unloved.
"Am I... am I really that annoying?" He whispered, his voice cracking and sounding more horse than it should. "Do you... Do you think I’m too much, too?"
Y/N’s heart twisted painfully as she heard his words, the broken way he spoke them. She frowned deeply, pulling back just enough to look down at him, her hand cupping his wet cheek as she met his gaze, her thumb brushing away a stray tear that had slipped down his face.
"Oh, sweetheart..." She shook her head gently, her voice laced with disbelief and fierce love. "No. No, Chris, of course not. You’re not annoying. You’re not too much. You’re everything I could ever want. You’re perfect exactly the way you are."
He clenched his fists, gripping onto Y/N’s hoodie - or better, his own blue hoodie -, his knuckles white with the force of it as he tried to agree with her, but her words didn’t seem to reach him. His brow furrowed, his eyes filling with fresh tears as he choked out.
"They said... They said I’m always yelling, being loud, making a scene... like I’m always... embarrassing them." His voice caught on the last words, his breath hitching as he fought to keep from breaking down completely.
Y/N held him tighter, her hand moving to the bottom of his white shirt, traveling inside of it only to rub soothing circles along his naked back as she spoke in a soft, steady tone, hoping her words would anchor him.
"Chris, they love you. They’re just... they don’t understand how much their words hurt sometimes. But that doesn’t mean you’re a burden or that you’re too much. You bring so much joy and energy to everything. That’s part of who you are, and it’s one of the things I love most about you."
He shook his head slightly, his breathing coming faster as anxiety started to build again, overtaking him.
"I... I just don’t get it. One minute, they’re saying people watch us because we’re different... and then they tell me I should be more like them. I don’t... I don’t know how to be that. I tried so hard to be like them, you have to believe me, but I don’t know how to change who I am-"
Y/N felt the depth of his frustration in the desperate way that he begged, wanting - no, needing - her to believe him. She cupped his face gently, urging him to look at her.
"You don’t have to change, Chris. Not for anyone. You’re enough just as you are, baby. And you’re not a burden. Not to me, not to anyone who really sees you and loves you for who you are."
He nodded slowly, finally trying to take a deep breath, only to feel like his nose was closed and his throat was being chocked by invisible hands. He closed his eyes forcefully, biting his bottom lip in concentration as he tried to breathe in a gulp of air that never seemed to be enough. Chris could feel his heart tightening, his chest struggling in the quick movements of going up and down too many times in a second.
"Can't- I... Please-" He tried, tightening his hands around her hoodie, panicking with the anxiety attack that seemed to come so suddenly.
"Hey, hey, Chris. Sweetheart, you’re okay." Y/N whispered softly, her voice a calming presence against the storm inside him. She shifted slightly, one hand now resting on his chest with a firm press as she guided him through deep breaths, her own voice slow and steady. "Come on, just breathe with me, okay? In... and out... Nice and slow. I’m right here with you."
Following her lead, Chris pressed his eyes tighter in a way that made him see stars behind his eyelids, focusing on the rhythm of her voice, the rise and fall of her own breathing against his fists. With each exhale, he felt a bit of the tension release, his chest loosening as he tried to match her calming breaths.
Gradually, his racing heart began to slow, the adrenaline draining from his body, leaving him feeling heavy, exhausted.
Y/N smiled softly, brushing her fingers through his hair as she pressed a gentle kiss to his forehead.
"There you go. That’s it... Well done, my strong boy. Now, just relax. I’ve got you."
As his breathing evened out, Chris opened his eyes slowly, his blurred gaze meeting hers with a vulnerability that tore at her heart.
"You don’t have to carry all of this alone, Chris. I’m always here for you, no matter what. You’re safe with me, okay? I love you... so much." She leaned down, pressing another kiss to his forehead as she held him close, her voice soft.
The gentle reassurance, the quiet love in her words wrapped around him like a blanket, pulling him further into her warmth. His eyelids grew heavier, the tiredness finally catching up with him as he let himself surrender to the comfort of her arms, a quiet whine escaping his throat.
"I know, honey. Sleep." Y/N whispered, a tender smile on her lips as she cradled him closer, holding him like a mother would hold her kid, her hands tracing soothing patterns along his back. "You can rest. I’ll be right here when you wake up."
As she continued to whisper soft reassurances, her fingers running gently through his hair, Chris’s breathing finally evened out, his body relaxing completely in her arms. His head rested on the curve of her neck, his arms still wrapped around her waist as he drifted off, his pain and worries slipping away in the safety of her embrace.
Y/N leaned down, pressing one last, lingering kiss to his hair before laying her cheek against his head, her arms wrapped securely around his body as she watched over him.
"I love you, sweet boy."
     ༻﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡﹡༺
A couple of hours had passed, the sunsetting casting a soft, warm light over Chris’s room, where he and Y/N lay wrapped together on the bed. Chris’s face was nestled against her shoulder, his breathing steady and calm now, his chest rising and falling in sync with hers.
Outside the room, Matt and Nick exchanged a glance. They’d been standing in the hallway for nearly five minutes, trying to muster the courage to knock. Their earlier argument with Chris had weighed heavily on both of them, guilt twisting in their stomachs as they replayed every hurtful word that had left their mouths.
Finally, Matt raised his fist and knocked softly on Chris’s door, the faint sound echoing in the silence. When there was no answer, he hesitated, glancing at Nick before slowly pushing the door open.
They both froze at the sight before them. Chris and Y/N were curled up together on the bed, Chris’s face still damp from tears as he lay against her, completely relaxed in her arms. Y/N had one arm around his shoulders, her fingers resting in his hair, while her other hand was hiding inside his shirt, holding his back, cradling him protectively. They looked peaceful.
Matt’s heart clenched at the sight, guilt intensifying as he took in Chris’s tear-streaked face. He glanced over at Nick, who was staring down at his feet, clearly feeling the same crushing remorse.
"Let's go. We can come back later." Matt muttered, pulling Nick towards himself before starting to back out of the room, thinking it might be best to give Chris a bit more time.
But just as they were about to close the door, Chris stirred, shifting slightly in Y/N’s arms. He nuzzled his head on her shoulder, his face just inches from the gentle slope of her neck where he could still catch the faint, familiar scent of her perfume mingling with the natural warmth of her skin.
He moved slightly, careful not to wake her, though his movement caused her to pull him in closer, her fingers instinctively brushing over his back. The feeling of her hand tracing small, soothing circles over his shoulder as if it was a muscle memory grounded him further, coaxing a soft sigh from him as he nuzzled deeper into her embrace, pressing a gentle, barely-there kiss to her neck.
When his sleepy eyes finally traveled around the room while gently stretching his legs between hers, he finally caught Matt and Nick's figures standing in the doorway.
His face fell the instant he realized they were there, his peaceful expression replaced by a guarded, distant look. Carefully, he eased himself up, making sure not to wake Y/N as he pulled himself away from her arms.
"Came for round two?" He looked at Matt and Nick, his sleepy voice laced with bitterness as he asked.
Nick swallowed, words catching in his throat as he struggled to find the right thing to say. What an irony. He opened his mouth but only managed to mumble, stumbling over his words as he tried to get them out.
Finally, Nick took a small step closer, his voice barely above a whisper.
"Chris, I... we came to say... We just..." His pearly teeth caged his bottom lip momentarily, taking a deep breath. "We love that you’re different."
Chris stared at him, incredulous, eyebrows raised as he scoffed softly.
"Different? That’s what you’re leading with?" His eyes narrowed, hurt simmering just beneath the surface. "So now I’m the ‘different’ one? Funny, ‘cause that didn’t seem to be a good thing a few hours ago."
Nick faltered, his face flushing as he realized his words weren’t coming out the way he intended. He tried again, tripping over his explanation.
"No, no, I... I didn’t mean it like that. I just-"
Chris took a deep, shaky breath, his gaze lowered as he avoided Nick and Matt's eyes, interrupting Nick.
"Look, I want to apologize, alright?" He started, his voice barely more than a murmur, thick with emotion. "I know it was all my fault and that I’m a lot to handle. I get it. I can be too loud, too... everything, really. And I know I’m not like you guys. I’ve tried so hard to be, but it’s just... not me." His words hung heavy in the room, his fingers twisting anxiously in his lap. "I feel like sometimes I just ruin things because I don’t know how to turn it off. You two seem to have this balance, you know when to joke and when to be serious, and I’m over here just... always pushing things too far."
He exhaled deeply, finally lifting his eyes to meet his brothers', the weight of insecurity and years of self-doubt written all over his face.
"I’m sorry if it feels like you have to put up with me. I’ve tried to be more like you, but it’s never enough. And sometimes... it just feels like who I am isn’t what anyone wants." His voice cracked at the last words, his vulnerability laid bare, and he quickly looked away, bracing himself for whatever they would say.
Nick and Matt shared a look, each seeing the guilt mirrored in the other’s eyes as Chris’s words sank in, cutting through them like a blade.
Matt felt his chest tighten, a pang of regret settling heavily in his stomach, making it hard to breathe. How could he have let Chris - his little brother, the boy who was always loving him no matter what - believe, even for a second, that he wasn’t wanted exactly as he was?
His legs moved on instinct, carrying him back into the room before he even registered it, straight to Chris, who looked so small and hurt, slumped at the edge of the bed. Kneeling down, Matt reached out, placing a steadying hand on Chris’s knee, his fingers gently pressing into his brother’s skin as if trying to ground him.
"Chris, you’re our little brother. I don’t ever want you to feel like you’re too much for us." He swallowed, his voice wavering as he continued, willing Chris to see and feel every word. "I love you, man. We love you for who you are. You don’t need to change a thing. It’s your energy, your spark that makes everything better. You have this way of bringing life into everything, and that’s something I wouldn’t change for anything." He looked into Chris’s eyes, his own gaze filled with a raw honesty. "We need you to be you, Chris. No one else."
Nick’s heart clenched as he watched, his own guilt building with every second. Gaining control over the hurt and regret flooding him, he crossed the room in long strides, dropping down beside Matt. He looked up at Chris, his throat tight with emotion, the sight of his little brother so closed-off, so wounded, cutting deep. He was supposed to protect him, not hurt him.
"Yeah... you being another person? That’s not what we want at all. We’ve never wanted you to be anyone else. You’re perfect the way you are, Chris." Nick’s voice shook, filled with a determination to make Chris understand the truth, to undo every careless word he and Matt had thrown his way earlier. "I'm so, so sorry that we said all of those things and made you think so bad about yourself."
Chris’s defenses wavered, his resolve crumbling as he glanced between his brothers. Their sincerity seeped through, but doubt still clouded his gaze. He let out a heavy sigh, loosening his grip on his hoodie just a bit.
"You promise?" His voice was barely a whisper, fragile and laced with uncertainty, his fingers twisting anxiously into the fabric of his sleeve.
Without hesitation, Nick reached forward, taking Chris’s hands in his own, intertwining their fingers and squeezing firmly.
"We promise. We love how wild you are, how you’re always the one bringing the energy. You’re louder, sure, but that’s not something bad, it's exactly what makes you, you. You’re the happiest out of the three of us, Chris, and we wouldn’t change that for anything." He gave Chris’s hand another reassuring squeeze, feeling the smallest hint of relief when he saw the younger brother begin to relax, if only slightly.
Matt nodded, adding gently.
"And hey, I don’t think we need to be professional or act in a type of way for our videos to be good. The viewers love us for who we are... the mix of chaos and calm. That’s what makes us, us. It’s why they stick around."
Chris took a shaky breath, letting their words settle over him, feeling the weight of them begin to ease some of the pain. Slowly, he nodded, his fingers curling back around Nick’s reassuring grip.
"Okay."
Matt leaned forward, placing a hand on Chris’s shoulder.
"We’ll do better, alright? We’re brothers. We’re gonna mess up, but that doesn’t mean we won’t have each other’s backs. Always."
Chris exhaled deeply, finally letting the tension melt away as he leaned into their touch, the comfort of his brothers grounding him in a way only they could. Straightening himself, he managed a small, tired smile, his heart feeling a bit lighter.
"Yeah... always."
"Well, I’m really glad you guys are okay again." Y/N’s soft voice broke the silence, bringing all three heads up in surprise.
She moved with a quiet strength as she sat up and brushed her hand tenderly through Chris’s hair, watching his face light up as he realized she’d been awake all along.
"But just so we’re clear... if either of you hurt my baby like that again, you’re going to have to answer to me." She turned her gaze to Nick and Matt, a playful but fierce glint in her eyes.
"Y/N..." Chris dragged the last letter of her name in a whining tone, feeling flustered with how she called him 'her baby' in front of his brothers - even though they were more than accustomed with it.
Nick’s eyes widened jokingly with her threat, a chuckle escaping him. He lifted his hands in mock surrender, glancing at Matt as if to say, 'Well, we better watch out'. Matt nodded, eyes a bit sheepish, scratching the back of his neck.
"Alright, alright, no more ganging up on Chris. You have our word, Y/N."
Content with their promises, Y/N turned her attention back to Chris, opening her arms and pulling him into her embrace once more. He let out a soft sigh, sinking into her warmth, his head nestled against her shoulder. Her arms wrapped around him protectively, fingers tracing soothing circles along his back as she whispered.
"I told you they didn't mean it." He closed his eyes, letting her words wash over him, the last bits of hurt melting away.
Nick and Matt watched the two of them, a fondness softening their expressions.
"You know." She murmured, pulling Chris's head away from her chest and looking at him with a mischievous grin. "You’re pretty lucky to have all of us wrapped around your finger."
Chris laughed, a real laugh this time, the sound full of relief and love.
"Yeah, I know. I just... I guess I forget sometimes."
"Well." Nick started, squeezing Chris’s shoulder with a grin. "We’re not going anywhere. So next time, just remind us if we’re being idiots, alright?"
Chris nodded, glancing gratefully at each of them, feeling more grounded and cherished than he had in a long time.
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haunteddollstuff · 15 hours ago
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I don't want to be quiet and reserved I want to be all over my friends I want to hug them and feel their skin and Im so scared of that because I don't want them to leave because I'm overwhelming, but if I hold back I pull away because I feel like I'm not doing enough
I need people who love me as a being who wants to feel and bite and love all the time
feeling like you're 'too much' and 'not enough' at the same time is so confusing and heartbreaking
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txttletale · 2 days ago
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penny for yout thoughts on the latino vote this election? i'm on a working visa in a very liberal part of the US right now. it's hard for me to be objective right now, i feel like my own people (sigh) betrayed me. what happened?
everything i've seen seems to support the idea that, just like most us voters, a very large percentage of latinos treat elections in general and this one in particular as a big referendum on Econony: Good Or Bad? [x] and that the economy is a higher priority for most of them than immigration policy [x].
also, yknow, even if immigration had mattered a lot to latino voters, "the camps are good and should be expanded, we need crueler, more violent, more vicious border policy" was a bipartisan consensus this election. harris couldn't shut up about how tough on the border she was. the message the democrats wanted to send was "don't worry, we are just as racist as the republicans" -- with that as their pitch, why apart from inertia would anyone expect an overwhelming latino majority for the democrats?
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bbydoll18xx · 3 days ago
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I Try to Refrain (But You’re Stuck in my Brain)
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You have a dream about Paige, and it leads to some shocking revelations.
Paige Bueckers x Reader
Masterlist
Word Count: 1.2k
Themes: loneliness, reader realizes she's in love with her best friend, paige is a flirt (what's new?)
A/N: hi guys. sorry it's been a hot min. This election has made me miserable and my grandpa just died today so I wrote this to distract myself lol. I wanted to write something that wasn't fluff before coming out with a new part to I've Got a Wand and a Rabbit, so hopefully this will suffice. Please don't let this flop
Also Is There Somewhere is one of most favorite songs of all time you all should check it out if you've never heard it !!
Please enjoy:)
~
There was simply no denying that being a college student was pretty fucking exhausting. Between your on-campus casual job, the extensive list of assignments you had racked up, and the overwhelming need to still have a social life, the circles under your eyes had become much more pronounced in the last few weeks. 
You needed your beauty sleep, or else you’d be well on your way to looking like Shrek by the end of the semester. And because you had been on the hunt to end your single streak, looking like Shrek would be the worst thing to happen. 
You giggle to yourself, the sleep deprivation clearly making you delirious. Checking your watch, you see that you had in fact been up for a whopping 28 hours. It was time for a seriously good nap. You throw your backpack onto the floor of your bedroom, tugging your sweatshirt off of you and flopping down onto your bed. The plushness engulfs you in warmth and comfort, lulling you into a deep, calming sleep, that you so desperately needed.
Or so you thought.
~
You wake up panting. The air around you is suffocatingly hot, and you can feel the sheets twisted uncomfortably around your legs, trapping you in the warmth. Your heart is pounding against your chest, and you slide your hand across your sternum in a futile effort to soothe yourself. 
The dream was quickly fading, and you squeeze your eyes in deep concentration, desperate to hold on to the remnants of it before they fled from your racing thoughts. 
It was hazy. But the pounding of your chest and the fluttering that accompanied made you feel like you were missing a key detail. It was right on the tip of your tongue, inching further and further away the more you search for the answers. 
You were in bed with another person. They were warm, and their laugh was enough to make you want to get down on one knee right then and there. You were cuddled up with them, the feeling of peace washing over you.
It has been a long time since you felt peace, and as you search for more clues to unearth your future love of your life, the wistfulness settles deep inside you. It mocks you, whispering into your ear that you’d never feel so lucky to be at peace with someone. 
The last of the dream fades, and you groan, throwing your arm over your face and vowing to prove your meanest, most vile inner voices wrong. 
Because, goddamn it, you did deserve to be loved. And maybe, just maybe, it would happen for you. 
~
You go to bed that night with a fierce determination to coax your brain into revealing more, and as you settle into bed, you pop two benadryl tablets. 
‘This’ll give me some good dreams,’ you think slyly, before shutting your eyes and waiting for the next clue, sleep quickly overcoming your thoughts.
You sleep soundly, waking the next morning with a crick in your neck and long, blonde hair on your brain. 
“Holy fuck,” you whisper, your dream still playing again in your muddled brain. “It’s a girl," you say incredulously.
"Or maybe an Australian surfer dude," you say sarcastically out loud to yourself.
"God, I'm losing it," you mumble, rubbing a hand over your sleepy eyes.
Her face was blank, deluding you of figuring out who it really was, but the familiar, tinkling laughter was playing on a loop. It was making you crazy. 
Your thoughts drift back to being tangled up with lean limbs, the soft hair flowing over slim, strong shoulders and down the girl’s bare back. You recall how you had traced a line down the line of her spine, goosebumps erupting in the wake of your touch. 
She was strong and delicate, a dichotomy of perfection that had your thighs clenching in want and your heart clenching in need.
You sigh. It felt almost real, and now it was being ripped from you every time you woke up. It felt unnecessarily cruel, and tears prick your eyes as reality sets in. You were escaping to a fantasy world in your dreams to avoid the crushing forlornness that was settling deep into your bones. 
Loneliness was certainly the muse, it seemed. 
~
You meet up with your friends later that night, searching for a distraction from the blonde hair that was currently haunting every waking moment. As you cross campus to head to Aubrey’s apartment, you scold yourself as each blonde who passes you makes you glance hopefully in their direction. 
There had to be something to jog your memory, unclouding the face you wanted nothing more to recognize. But each face elicited a disappointed pang in your stomach that spread an uncomfortable coldness through the rest of your body. 
You shake your head as you approach Aubrey’s door, trying to rid yourself of the disheartened aura you were currently giving off. 
You and Aubrey had become friends two years ago, and by extension, the rest of her team and her girlfriend had accepted you with open arms. You were looking forward to Caroline and Azzi’s wisdom and kind smiles. And KK and Ice’s laughter would certainly be a great distraction. 
Your mind gently drifts towards Paige before the door swings open with a large bang, and a loud, joyous cry erupts from the group of girls in the apartment. 
You wave at them, cheeks turning pink from the attention. You scan the room, letting your brain secretly look for Paige, just to check to see if it would trigger the flashes of your dream. 
You move towards the kitchen, joining into a heated discussion KK and Jana were having about Legos, eyes still darting around curiously.
“I’m obviously the best and fastest builder,” KK boasts, sticking her tongue out childishly at her teammate, and you giggle, taking a sip of your drink as Jana voraciously defends herself and her Lego-building abilities.
It was almost subconscious. You step back, as if you were being pulled against your will, and you hit a wall of warmth and muscle. Your heart lurches as your mind registers what was happening. 
“Damn, ma. I gotchu, don’t worry,” Paige mumbles in your ear, chuckling as you turn into a bumbling mess in her firm grasp. 
“Oh, god. I’m sorry, P,” you whisper, not trusting your full voice. You steady yourself, proud that you at least did not spill your drink. 
Her hand slides down your side to rest heavily on your waist, and her touch ignites a fire in your belly. Your breath hitches as you look up at her. Her hair is down for once, flowing across her shoulders, and your head spins as she laughs again. 
You knew that laugh.
“Never gonna complain about having to rescue a pretty girl,” she flirts, and you turn your head, not wanting her to see the way her words sent your face up in a blaze of heat. The realization hits you like a crashing wave.
Your dream was about Paige fucking Bueckers.
Your friend, Paige Bueckers. 
You were so goddamn fucked.
Maybe that wouldn’t be such a bad thing. 
~
What'd we think?? Please let me know. I might do another part if you guys are up for it.
Thanks so much for reading. I'm hoping I will be writing more frequently from now on
xoxo katy
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rinachains · 23 hours ago
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suguru was pleasantly surprised when you shook him awake this early morning and told him in a groggy voice that you wanted to take a shower together.
both of your bodies are still a little sore from the night before, as evidenced by the small bruises and marks scattered across your skin.
it's rare that you and suguru shower together since you prefer to shower at night while he prefers to shower in the morning. you also once explained to him that you like your space in there and that another person would kind of overwhelm you, so the idea of cleaning up together never really appealed to you.
he respected that, of course, but not without a tiny, little pout on his lips.
but now the two of you are standing in your shower stall, the glass door fogged from the warm water you always use, and the fresh, soothing scent of suguru's shampoo lingering in the stuffy air.
droplets of water cover your bare bodies, glistening, as suguru's back is turned to you so that you can wash his hair.
you can't help but admire the way his long, black locks cascade down the muscles of his broad back like ink accidentally spilled over a precious letter.
even though it doesn't seem like a big deal, you know that the fact that you can wash his hair is a sign of trust that only you are granted. his hair is important to him, he can be quite stingy when it comes to it - or dramatic, as you like to call it sometimes - and the realization that suguru even asked you to wash it for him makes you more than giddy.
taking more product into your hands, you rub them together to make the shampoo lather, and you have to reach up slightly to massage the product into his scalp in circular motions.
suguru's head falls back into your gentle, working hands with a low groan, the sound echoing through the small space.
"I could get used to this," he sighs, a pleased smirk tugging at the corners of his mouth.
you snort behind him, "don't. this is basically a once in five years occurrence."
"mhm, I guess I should tire you out the night before more often then. it makes you quite cooperative."
a slight hiss escapes him as he feels a sharp tug on his hair.
"oh, sorry, I forgot that this is reserved for our bedroom," you say in a false, innocent tone, and suguru reaches a hand behind him to grab your wrist and halt your movements.
he glances over his shoulder, only to see an amused, mocking expression on your beautiful face. there's still a drowsy look clouding your half-lidded eyes, a puffiness that makes your cheeks and your lips plump, and he's suddenly overcome with the need to lift you into his arms and squeeze you against his chest until both of your lungs threaten to collapse.
"do you realize that we're both naked right now and that you're doing this?" he asks lowly with an arch of his thin brow. the grip on your wrist in his large palm is loose, a ghostly touch that you could easily free yourself from.
you simply shrug, "it's not my fault if it gets you off, I don't really see anything erotic about it right now. besides, you started with the dirty talk."
huffing in return, he turns back to face the wall and lets go of your wrist, but not before quickly bringing it to his lips and planting a light, ticklish kiss on it.
"that's hardly dirty talk from me, you should know that."
"I do, but your quality is not always consistent either."
"I wonder how someone can be so sweet and mean at the same time."
a humming noise emanates from you, automatically sending a shiver down his spine, "I can only throw the question back at you."
suguru can't stop a grin from forming on his flushed face, and his eyelids flutter shut as you touch a sensitive spot on his scalp.
"guess that's why we're here, huh."
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aceing-on-the-cake · 6 hours ago
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So every time I see posts like this I think about the fact that drowning people can, will, and most often do end up trying to drown their rescuers, and that lifeguards are trained because of this to offer an object and not themselves first, such as a flotation tube, before placing themselves within arms reach.
Then I think about the two times in my life where I had spent months, where I would have days in between even speaking to another human because I was so lacking in contact.
Then I think about when I did gain people again, and they told me they cared about me, and they took an interest in me, and they spent time with me.
And I think about the feeling of desperation that overwhelmed me when they would stop, for even minutes or hours. Because they were sleeping. Because they were busy. Because they are humans with their own lives to live.
I remember having to sit there, and face that gnawing hole inside me that I knew was illogical. Knew was born out of fear, and loss, and how 15 minutes put me right back in that water all alone even if I could see I was on land.
Because drowning people are dangerous.
And I knew I was dangerous, unless I controlled this feeling. Faced it. Looked at it right in the eyes and chose to trust that when I had asked them before "you like me? you don't find me annoying? you want to be in my life?" that they meant it.
And now I'm reading this post and I'm not drowning, and you can leave me in the water alone, comfortably alone, and I don't often flash back to feeling like I am. But I still do, and I think I always will.
Because I almost died. And I don't think I'll ever truly forget that.
But drowning people are dangerous, and most people are not trained lifeguards. So when you drag them down to you, you use them to hold your head above water by placing theirs under, they can either drown with you, or they can let go.
And most people are going to let go. Because nobody wants to drown.
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golden-ebony · 3 days ago
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Omg I adored your 10’s a crowd fic!! What if Logan was with a reader who loved the color pink! Their bedroom had pink everything, even wearing pink! You can make them innocent if you want but imagine how Logan would just find the reader so angel-like coming hard surrounded by bright pink pastels🤭
Handsome in Pink‧₊˚❀༉‧₊˚.
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♡ Pairing: Logan Howlett/female!Reader
♡ Word Count: 1.4k
♡ Rating: Explicit 18+
♡ Warning/Tags: SMUT! MINORS DNI, sub!Logan, hand job in the mirror, PRAISE, p-v sex, unprotected sex, a lil cum play (kinda?), a lil orgasm denial
♡ Note: Just a quick lil thing because love a lil sub!Logan and I love the color pink. I specifically envision worst!Logan for this, but do as you please
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It wasn't something Logan had noticed about you at first. Pink. Typically, it was something subtle like your nails or just one piece of your outfit like that short little number that drove him crazy. When you causally mentioned that it was your favorite color, it all clicked for him. It wasn't just what you wore.
It was the little coral trinkets and floor mats in your car. It was rose gold key ring. It was the baby pink lace panties that poked out when you reached across his lap to grab the remote. They were all different shades. You saw rose, millennial, salmon, cherry blossom, etc. Logan, on the other hand...
"Hm, the site says pastel but then sends this," you groaned as you eyed the skirt that arrived in the mail.
With furrowed brows, Logan crossed his arms. "Ain't that pastel?"
"It's more bubblegum than pastel."
"But it's pink."
"You don't get it."
Logan would be the first to admit that he didn't exactly have an eye for fashion or design, but when he saw your room for the first time, he knew he had never seen so much pink in his life. There were a variety of pinkish hues were broken up by white furniture and flourishing green plants. The pastel bedding mixed with darker pillows and blankets somehow worked for Logan.
Logan had never seen a room like this. And by god, he had never experienced pleasure the way he did in that rosy room.
Your preference for pink gave people a number of preconceived notions, Logan included. A number of those assumptions were correction. Sweet, romantic, sensitive, tender—these were words that could describe you.
Innocent wasn't one of them. And Logan learned this in the best way possible.
"Look at you, baby," you cooed, feathery kisses lining Logan's shoulder. Both on your knees, you were flushed against Logan's taut back. Logan's large figure towered over yours. Still, you had a clear view of the man in your standing mirror. Your slight hand, wet from a mix of your own saliva and his pre-cum, was wrapping around his throbbing cock. Your nails of your other hand slightly tranced circles onto his back. "So handsome, so big...so good for me."
Logan's chest heaved and abs clenched as you tried to control his breathing. It was overwhelming for Logan. The feeling of your frilled, cerise bralette against his back, your warm hand steadily pumping him, your soft stare gazing at his reflection.
It would be easy for Logan to thrust his hips into your grip, control the pace. But there was something about giving into you, surrendering to your alluring spell.
"Fuck, sweetheart..." Logan's groans came deep from his chest as he tried to ignore every dominant instinct he had. "I need to touch you. Please darlin'."
You relished in his begs and pleads but continued your pace. The deep growls that were emitting from his chest was proof of thin his control was at. Your thumb grazed on his tip causing Logan's hips to unintentionally buck.
Your nails roughly dug into his back, earning a wince mixed with pain and pleasure. "Easy, baby...I think you're doing just fine with what you got, yeah?"
Logan couldn't find the words to respond. The smell of your peony perfume and your soft voice dancing through his head, being under your trance—it was intoxicating. Retraining himself, Logan dug his own palms into the sides of his thighs. He was a mess, and you both were loving every second of it.
It was like a high to watch the indestructible man crumble under the simple weight of your touch, knees digging into the cerise fleeced blanket. With ragged breaths and a twitching cock, you could tell Logan near his climax. You savored the strained breaths and groans that Logan couldn't help but release.
"You're gonna come for me, Lo." Your voice was just above a whisper, but you knew Logan heard you. You weren't asking; you never had to. Keeping your speed steady, you keep your eyes locked on his through the mirror. "Just let it happen, baby. Doing so good for me."
Logan's release was almost immediate as if he was waiting for your divine approval. His body clenched against your, feeling his release tighten every inch of his physique. He'd rather have painted your walls, feel you clench around him. But the feeling of taking ropes of his cum into your palm just to lather his still-hardened cock with it as he rode his high felt like something else entirely. As he watched you lubricate his cock further, his thoughts were completely taken over by your soft moans of approval.
"Oh, Lo, such a good boy," you purred against his shoulder. The sound of your praise made his cock twitch again. And you knew what he wanted.
You looked ethereal as you rode his cock. The sight of his cock continuously disappearing into your tight cunt—leaving a creamed ring in its wake—it was heaven. Logan was more than happy to watch you control your pace on his lap in exchange of finally being able to caress you. With a slacked jaw, his rough hands massaged your soft skin from your thighs to your ass, all while watching provide him levels of pleasure that he hadn't experienced in years. And he never imagined he'd feel this way with blushed, stringed lights in his vision field and rose, satin sheets smoothing his back.
Even when you told Logan not to come, not yet at least, Logan found that there was a level of pleasure of watching you get yourself off on his lap. Yes, flipping you over and hammering deep into you until you drunk from his cock sounded good. Yet, surrendering to your alluring call was something else entirely.
"Jesus, princess." He words were barely audible as his eyes roamed your figure. "So goddamn pretty."
Your hum turned into a worn gasp as you felt your climax on the horizon again. You knew ordering Logan to hold off on his own climax during your last one was difficult. As your grinds turned into bounces, Logan looked desperate. He needed to finish in you, coat his favorite pink walls white.
"I know, Lo..." You were practically about to come apart yourself, leaning down to pressed your chest against his. Your strained yet firm voice rang in his ear, "I need y-you to fill me, baby. S-so close."
His grip on your hips slightly tightened. His needy eyes looked in with yours, scanning for you permission to give you everything he had. He didn't see it but he sure as hell heard.
"Please, Logan, just fuck me! I need you, baby."
Like flipping a switch, his hips thrusted up into you with reckless abandon. Your cries were soon muffled when Logan's lips meet yourself in a searing kiss, but he needed to hear those pretty little moans of yours no matter how sweet you tasted. Nuzzling his head into your neck, he continued to mercilessly thrust into you, feeling the recoil of your ass against his hips.
The combination of his teeth nipping at your pulse and pounding deliciously close to your cervix made your eyes roll. You knew you were good at getting Logan to fall into a wave of pleasure just from your touch alone, but the both of you knew Logan could easily turn those tides.
"That's it, Lo. No one fucks me like yo—fuck!" Your voice cracked as your orgasm shot through your body quicker than you expected. Your nails dug themselves into Logan's shoulder as he continued to fuck you through your high. The cries of his name was enough to push him to his edge.
"Ah—shit! Thank you, baby, so fucking good!" With three final thrusts, Logan spilled into you, completely enveloped in a rosy haze. He came harder than he did earlier, entirely stuffing you with his arousal.
Clinging to your glistened figure, his mind was cloudy. The rose-colored sheets were definitely closer to cherry under Logan's sweating form. He couldn't conjure a singular thought as you slowly grinded against his, singing his praises. There wasn't a better feeling; Logan was sure of it.
If pleasure had a color, it was definitely pink.
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♡ note: i love hearing y'all's thoughts
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levandright · 3 days ago
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𝐖𝐎𝐑𝐃𝐒 𝐎𝐅 𝐀𝐅𝐅𝐈𝐑𝐌𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍
their favorite way to show their love for you is through — words of affirmationꜝꜝ
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if you enjoyed reading this consider leaving a like or reblog ᐢ..ᐢ
pairing ⋆ ot7 enhypen x gn! reader ʬʬ content / warning(s) ⋆ comfort—so much comfort, established relationship, non-idol au ꕀ word count : 2,541 (the longest yet) ʬʬ go back to the start? ᐢ..ᐢ lev notes : tysmmm to my lovely moots for giving me the inspiration for this by answering my lil survey <3 as usual my bsf proofread + edited and added to this (they should start their own blog istg- but then again they don't really write as a hobby... + they're busy so i think their blog would just collect dust T-T) i should really take notes cause they write so poetically...
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𝗟𝗘𝗘 𝗛𝗘𝗘𝗦𝗘𝗨𝗡𝗚 - “ you are capable of so much more than you know.”
you’re sitting on your bed, feeling the weight of deadlines and responsibilities pressing down on you. the glow of your laptop screen feels harsh in the dim light, and you can’t shake the sense of being overwhelmed. just as you take a deep breath, there’s a soft knock at your door.
“heesung?” you call, grateful for his presence. he opens the door, his expression shifting from concern to warmth as he sees you.
“hey y/n, i brought some snacks,” he says, holding out a plate of your favorite treats. “but I can tell you need more than just food right now.”
you give a small smile, but it fades as you look back at your screen. “i just feel like everything is piling up. i don’t know how to handle it all.”
he sits down beside you, placing the snacks aside. “let me remind you of something,” he begins, his voice soft yet steady. “just like the moon must endure the night before it can shine, you too will find your light again. it’s okay to feel this way; it’s part of the journey.”
you look at him, captivated by his words. “but what if I can’t find my way?”
he gently takes your hand, his grip reassuring. “you are not lost; you are simply navigating through a storm. allow the winds to guide you, and trust that the sun will rise again. each challenge you face is like a note in a beautiful song—sometimes dissonant, but eventually leading to harmony.”
his poetic words wrap around you like a warm embrace, and you feel the tension in your shoulders start to ease. “you really know how to lift my mood, don’t you?”
he smiles, a twinkle in his eye. “i’m here to remind you that even the darkest nights will give way to dawn. let’s take a moment to breathe and celebrate your strength. you are capable of so much more than you know.”
with a newfound sense of hope, you nod. “thank you, heesung. i really needed to hear that.”
“anytime,” he replies, and together, you take a deep breath, allowing the weight to lift just a little more as you share in the comforting silence.
𝗣𝗔𝗥𝗞 𝗝𝗢𝗡𝗚𝗦𝗘𝗢𝗡𝗚 - “you did your best, and that’s enough.”
the evening is quiet as you sit on the edge of your bed, shoulders slumped and eyes fixed on the floor. it’s been a tough day—one of those days where no matter how hard you tried, nothing seemed to go right. frustration bubbles inside you, mixing with a sense of inadequacy you can’t seem to shake.
you hear a gentle knock at the door, and a moment later, jay steps inside. he takes one look at you and instantly understands; he’s seen that look before.
without a word, he crosses the room and sits beside you, placing a comforting hand on your shoulder. you look up, trying to manage a small smile, but it fades quickly. “i really tried, jay. but I feel like it wasn’t enough. nothing went the way i wanted it to.”
jay’s gaze is warm and understanding, his expression softening as he listens. he reaches for your hand, giving it a gentle squeeze. “hey,” he says, his voice calm and steady. “you did your best, and that’s enough.”
you blink, letting his words sink in, but part of you wants to protest. “but… what if my best wasn’t good enough?” he shakes his head, his hand still holding yours.
“your best isn’t measured by the outcome. it’s about the effort you put in, even when things get tough. you showed up, you tried, and that’s what really matters.”
a comforting silence settles between you as you take in his words. “i guess i just wanted everything to go perfectly.”
“i know,” he replies gently. “but perfection isn’t what makes you amazing. your determination, your resilience—that’s what i see, and that’s what matters to me.”
a small smile finally breaks through, and you feel a weight begin to lift. “thank you, jay. i needed to hear that.”
he smiles back, brushing a strand of hair behind your ear. “i’ll always be here to remind you.” then, with a soft touch, he pulls you into a warm hug, his embrace steady and reassuring.
and as you relax in his arms, you realize that maybe, just maybe, doing your best really is enough.
𝗦𝗜𝗠 𝗝𝗔𝗘𝗬𝗨𝗡 - “even the stormiest skies eventually clear.”
it’s a rainy evening, and the soft patter of raindrops against the window matches the heaviness in your heart. you sit curled up on the couch, wrapped in a blanket, staring at your phone, feeling overwhelmed by the weight of your worries.
suddenly, the door creaks open, and jake steps in, shaking off the rain and instantly brightening the room with his presence. “hey there sunshine,” he greets, noticing your downcast expression. “what’s got you looking so glum?”
you sigh, feeling a mix of relief and sadness. “just… everything. It’s been a rough few days.”
without hesitation, he plops down beside you, pulling you into his side. “i get it. life can feel like a heavy cloud sometimes, but remember, even the stormiest skies eventually clear.”
you lean against him, grateful for his warmth. “it just feels endless right now.”
he brushes a stray hair behind your ear, his voice steady and soothing. “you’re not alone in this. i’m here to help you carry the weight. let’s take it one step at a time. every storm has its purpose, and i believe you’re going to come out even stronger.”
a small smile breaks through your gloom as you look into his eyes. “thank you, jake. you always know how to make me feel better.”
he grins, his eyes sparkling. “of course. you light up the darkest nights. just remember, whenever you’re feeling low, I’m right here to remind you how incredible you are.”
feeling a sense of comfort wash over you, you snuggle closer, letting his reassuring words wrap around you like a warm blanket as the rain continues to fall outside.
𝗣𝗔𝗥𝗞 𝗦𝗨𝗡𝗚𝗛𝗢𝗢𝗡 - “you mean so much to me”
you’re standing in the snack aisle of your favorite grocery store, contemplating whether to go with your usual chips or try something new. sunghoon, who’s been scanning the shelves beside you, suddenly goes quiet. when you glance over, you catch him just… staring at you, a small, soft smile on his face.
“uh, did i miss something?” you ask, laughing a little as you grab a bag of chips.
sunghoon shakes his head, but his smile only grows wider. he takes a step closer, lowering his voice as if he’s about to share a secret. “you know you mean so much to me, right?”
you blink, surprised by the sudden confession. glancing around, you notice a few shoppers moving past, some casting curious looks your way. “sunghoon, we’re at the store…” you whisper, cheeks warming as you give him a playful nudge.
he chuckles, completely unfazed by the setting or the people around. “i know, but i just wanted to say it. i love you, and i don’t care where we are. i don’t want to miss a chance to remind you.”
your face softens, and you feel your heart flutter at his sincerity. “you’re so random sometimes, you know that?”
he grins, grabbing the bag of chips out of your hand to toss it into the cart. “maybe, but you love it,” he says with a playful wink.
you roll your eyes, trying to hide your smile. “yeah, maybe i do.”
and as you continue down the aisle, you feel lighter, his words replaying in your mind. sunghoon may choose the most unexpected times to say how he feels, but you wouldn’t have it any other way.
𝗞𝗜𝗠 𝗦𝗨𝗡𝗢𝗢 - “you are more than enough.”
the evening light filters through your window, but instead of its usual warmth, it only amplifies the feeling of heaviness in your chest. after a long day, you find yourself scrolling through social media, comparing yourself to the perfect smiles and flawless features of others. tears start to fall, blurring your vision as self-doubt creeps in.
suddenly, there’s a soft knock at your door, and before you can respond, sunoo enters. he immediately notices your tear-streaked face, his expression shifting from curiosity to concern. “hey, what’s wrong?” he asks, quickly crossing the room to sit beside you.
you wipe your eyes, attempting a smile, but it falters. “i just… i feel like i’m not pretty enough for you,” you admit, your voice trembling. “you could find someone so much better.”
sunoo’s heart aches at your words. he reaches out, gently taking your hand in his. “what? no way,” he says, his tone firm yet gentle. “you are more than enough. these thoughts don’t reflect who you truly are.”
“but everyone else seems perfect,” you reply, your voice breaking.
he shakes his head, squeezing your hand tighter. “perfection is a myth, and even if it were real, it wouldn’t matter. you are unique and beautiful in your own way. i see all the things that make you special, and they’re what drew me to you in the first place.”
a small, hopeful smile begins to form on your lips as you look into his eyes. “really?”
“absolutely,” he replies, leaning in closer. “i love you just the way you are, and i would never trade you for anyone else. you are perfect to me, and I’ll always be here to remind you of that, especially on the tough days.”
feeling the warmth of his words seep into your heart, you nod, gratitude flooding through you. “thank you, sunoo. i don’t know what i’d do without you.”
he wraps his arms around you, pulling you into a comforting embrace. “you’ll never have to find out. i’m here for you, always.”
as you settle into his warmth, the weight of your insecurities begins to lift. then, gently pulling back, sunoo cups your face in his hands, his eyes searching yours. “can i show you how much you mean to me?”
before you can respond, he leans in and kisses you softly, his lips brushing against yours with a tenderness that makes your heart flutter. it’s a kiss filled with reassurance and love, reminding you that you are enough just as you are.
𝗬𝗔𝗡𝗚 𝗝𝗨𝗡𝗚𝗪𝗢𝗡 - “you’re doing your best, and that’s what matters most.”
the sun has just begun to set, casting a warm glow through your bedroom window as you sit at your desk, surrounded by textbooks and notes. you’ve been putting in long hours, determined to improve your grades and stay on top of your studies. but tonight, exhaustion starts to seep in, and you can’t help but feel a twinge of doubt about whether all this effort is worth it.
just then, jungwon knocks softly before entering your room, a bright smile lighting up his face. “hey, i brought you some snacks!” he says cheerfully, holding up a plate filled with your favorite treats.
you look up, trying to muster a smile. “thanks, jungwon. i really appreciate it, but I’m not sure i have time to eat right now.”
he sets the plate down beside you and leans against the desk, observing your scattered notes. “you’ve been at this for hours, haven’t you? i just wanted to check in on you.”
you sigh, running a hand through your hair. “yeah, i’m trying to keep up, but it feels like I’m not making any progress.”
jungwon’s expression softens as he looks at you. “i see how hard you’re working every day, and i want you to know that it doesn’t go unnoticed. you’re putting in so much effort, and that’s something to be proud of.”
his words catch you off guard, and for a moment, you’re speechless. “you really think so?”
“absolutely,” he replies, his voice sincere. “you’re doing your best, and that’s what matters most. remember, progress isn’t always immediate, but every step you take is a step closer to your goals.”
feeling encouraged, you take a deep breath and nod. “thanks, jungwon. that means a lot coming from you.”
he smiles and pulls you into a gentle hug. “and don’t forget to take breaks, okay? you can’t pour from an empty cup.”
you laugh softly, feeling lighter already. “i’ll try my best.”
“good,” he says, stepping back and gesturing to the plate of snacks. “now, let’s take a break and enjoy these together. you deserve it.”
as you share the snacks and laughter, you feel a renewed sense of motivation. jungwon’s unwavering support reminds you that you’re not alone in your journey, and his encouragement makes all the difference.
𝗡𝗜𝗦𝗛𝗜𝗠𝗨𝗥𝗔 𝗥𝗜𝗞𝗜 - “it’s okay to be tired.”
it’s a saturday afternoon, and the sun filters through the window, casting a warm glow in the room. riki had been looking forward to spending the day with you, but as he watches you curled up on the couch, he notices something isn’t right. you’re usually vibrant and full of energy, but today, you seem dulled, your usual spark muted.
“y/n,” he says softly, sitting down beside you. “you okay? you seem a bit… off.”
you look up, forcing a small smile, but it doesn’t quite reach your eyes. “yeah, i’m fine. Just a bit tired, i guess.”
riki studies your face, noticing how your gaze drifts away, trying to mask your weariness. “you know, it’s okay to be tired. you don’t have to hide it from me. everyone has those days.”
you shrug, trying to play it off. “i didn’t want to ruin our day.”
he shakes his head, concern deepening in his eyes. “you could never ruin our time together. if you’re feeling overwhelmed, it’s totally normal. you don’t have to put on a brave face all the time.”
taking a deep breath, you look away, guilt creeping in. “i just didn’t want to burden you with my problems.”
“listen,” riki says gently, placing a reassuring hand on your shoulder. “feeling tired and needing a break doesn’t make you weak. it just means you’re human. we all have our limits. i care about you, and it’s okay to share how you really feel.”
you meet his gaze, feeling a mix of relief and gratitude. “i appreciate that, riki. i guess i just thought i should be able to handle it all.”
he smiles softly, his voice steady. “there’s strength in acknowledging when you need help. so, how about we take a break together? we can watch a movie and order your favorite takeout. no stress, just a cozy day.”
your heart warms at his thoughtfulness. “that sounds perfect.”
“great! i’ll grab my phone,” he says, jumping up with newfound energy. as he moves about the room, you feel a sense of comfort wash over you. riki has a way of making you feel understood, reminding you that it’s okay to let your guard down.
as the two of you settle in for a cozy afternoon, laughter and lightheartedness return, slowly chasing away the shadows of your worries. when he finally sits back down beside you, he leans closer, gently brushing a stray hair from your face.
“just remember, i’m always here for you,” he whispers, his eyes warm with sincerity.
before you can respond, he leans in and presses a soft kiss to your forehead, his touch lingering as a wave of comfort washes over you. in that moment, you feel a sense of peace, knowing that with riki by your side, you can be your true self without fear.
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perm taglist. @honeychocos @kozumesphone @manaah02 (open)
wyll taglist. @lilly-cherry7 (comment or ask to be added)
©levandright
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eldritchgriffin · 1 day ago
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As an ADHDer, I have experienced pretty much all of this. As a person who has now convinced two separate people to get tested for ADHD, resulting in them getting diagnosed, absolutely look into how you can get tested if you relate to even half of this.
Also, I frequently experience over/understimulation, so here's some Eldritch ADHD Advice. The most important thing is to become aware of when you are over/understimulated.
Some indicators of understimulation are boredom, difficulty focusing, or your mind wandering. The critical part is realizing that you losing focus is due to not having enough to focus on, not due to having too much to distract you.
Signs of overstimulation include feeling overwhelmed, disengaging from conversation because you can't find the energy to join in, and wanting to go somewhere quiet or lie down.
Now, for the actual advice:
The way I think of it is that my brain requires a very specific level of stimulation at any given time. Different tasks offer different levels and types of stimulation. The trick is figuring out what kind and how much engagement something takes.
As an example, I cannot listen to podcasts if I am not doing anything else. Podcasts are an audio only experience, and not one I have to actively engage with, so I struggle to focus on them. In the other direction, I can't listen to podcasts while driving, because driving requires too much focus, and I can't pay attention to the podcast. The balance I've found is podcast combined with a simple task or game. Cleaning is good as long as it doesn't require much thought, and for games I'll usually choose something like sudoku, nonograms, endless runners, or similar - nothing that requires reading though. The important thing is that it gives me something to look at and keeps my hands busy.
If I'm having trouble doing a task because it doesn't stimulate me enough, I'll try listening to (usually instrumental) music, or if the task requires audio, finding something to fidget with.
For overstimulation, noise-canceling headphones have been a game-changer for me. Also, know that sometimes it's okay to just leave. If you've been at an event for long enough you're getting overstimulated, and you don't need to stay longer, you can just go home, or at least find somewhere quiet to unwind for a bit. As the skeleton says, "if it sucks, hit da bricks."
This turned out much longer than I had planned lol. Hopefully at least some of it is helpful!
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bro im gonna CRY i didnt know this 🥺
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sweetpupii · 1 day ago
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Hi! Do you take requests?
If so, I think a fic bases on this excerpt:
"she can't have her parents walking in again. poor cassandra…finding your daughter with her whole face buried in between a girl's thighs is not the most ideal situation"
of your cailtyn story would be phenomenal 🙏
If you don't, feel free to ignore this! :)
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Let's start by saying Caitlyn knows how to eat pussy and loves doing it :3 babe could have it for breakfast, lunch, dinner and even dessert. she wouldn't call herself an expert per se, but she's quite proud of her talent.
sure, receiving it feels good—but what's better than knowing you're making a girl cum with just your mouth? to cait, absolutely nothing. the moans, the hair-pulling, the thighs clenching against her head ♡ ugh chef's kiss.
( she came untouched a few times from it but you did not hear it from me ok? )
it's usually one the first things she does when you successfully sneak into her room. like a reward for getting through massive place she calls home without anyone noticing.
your back against the bed and legs immediately spread to expose the sight she absolutely adores. god, she could just stare at it forever and it'd still have the same effect in between her own legs. new panties are needed.
she doesn't dive in face-first like an animal the second your clothes are off, even if she does feel like a starved woman. she starts by slowly kissing your thighs and caressing any bit of skin she can, hand sneaking up your abdomen and ribs to massage your breasts a little—don't mind it.
“Should I continue?” cocky because she already knows the answer is a breathy ‘yes, please’.
oh and she gets way more cocky once she finally starts working on you, soft and slow stripes and twirls with her tongue. nothing fancy yet; she wants to tease a little more.
the second your hips start bucking into her mouth though? girl, grab onto something because she takes the signs IMMEDIATELY.
legs propped up on her shoulder while her hands hold your hips down to keep control of them. the slurping sounds are almost pornographic with how sloppy she's being. no whine coming from you is gonna make her stop any time soon. she's enjoying it waaaay to much already.
if she's feeling nice she will add a finger or two while sucking ๋࣭⭑ curling them just right inside you, not in-and-out like crazy. her tongue’s already lapping at you pretty fast so no need to overwhelm you…yet.
she wishes you would look down at her for a sec to see that pretty expression better, but she also understands it's her own fault that your head is thrown back against the bed, clenching around her fingers while pulling at her hair. what a curse to be so good at pleasing girls.
she knew speeding up her movements wasn't a smart thing to do so late at night as soon as the loud whine that escaped your lips reached her ears. obviously louder than the previous ones.
the heavy thump on the door when it opened proved her right.
“Caitlyn.”
of course it had to be her mother out of all people.
cassandra's eyebrows furrowed as she looked away with a small huff, trying to erase the sight from her mind by blinking and observing every detail on the window. she thought caitlyn was trying to sneak out and get involved with stuff she shouldn't like she had done in the past with serious cases or something, not this!
“It is 3 am; please take your… friend out of here.” a dismissive wave of her hand showed that there wasn't much room for arguing—none really because she's already out the door with a low mumble to herself before her daughter could say anything. tomorrow's talk is gonna be awful, that's for sure.
“just keep quiet some more, then you can go home, alright?” the blue haired girl softly whispered, leaning up and kissing the soft skin on your shoulder to reassure that you're not leaving until you get a few well deserved orgasms, her fingers already going back to rubbing small circles.
she's not gonna let a pretty girl leave her bedroom unsatisfied even if it means getting caught again.
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siddyyyyyyyy · 16 hours ago
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Desire — I'm Hungry
Logan Howlett x Mutant!Reader
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MDNI wc: 0.6 K summary: Logan goes feral for your unique mutations. warnings: smut, no y/n used, riding, praise, subby Logan a/n: something possesed me again. Hope you enjoy!!
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Your pitch-black wings fluttered as you settled on Logan‘s cock, trying to take it all in one go, but he makes sure that you don‘t rush yourself.
With soft pants, you try to calm your breathing but it‘s almost impossible with how his hands keep caressing your feather-filled back, making you even more flustered.
»C‘mon, baby, don‘t rush… I‘ve got ya,« he murmurs against your shoulders, keeping his hands at your back to try and support you more on his lap. With a few final whimpers, you are seated on him fully and still. Logan takes the opportunity to run his hands across your back again, relishing in the soft feathers that run down your spine and muscles.
You always noticed that he seemed to like your mutation the most, always catching him staring across the room or even catch a glimpse of his twitching fingers at his sides, aching to touch you.
So, of course, the moment he gets some alone time with you, he won‘t waste a minute to pounce at you and get his hands all over. Tonight, it seemed like he was extra needy. Logan finally got to tell you about the admiration he holds for your unique features that come from your mutation; a crow hybrid.
A very fascinating thing in Logan‘s mind. And he calls himself a lucky man for having you all for himself. Such rich wings that shine in the sun should be cherished. He tries not to overwhelm himself with your beauty and mysterious looks.
He can‘t help himself whenever his hands land on your wings, gently caressing them while he controls his breathing under you.
Finally, what seemed like an eternity to you, you grind your hips into his own, cock sitting heavily inside of you, throbbing with need. But Logan doesn‘t seem too affected, breathing in your scent from the crook of your neck while he holds onto your hips. A low growl leaves him at the added friction, not quite getting what he needs, but he doesn‘t want to rush you for now.
»Fuck— « you pull your hips up, »ngh— darl‘,« sitting back down with full force. His head falls back, he has to pull himself together so he won‘t hammer his hips into you. Sighing out heavily, he makes sure to watch as you fuck yourself open on him and get a steady rhythm.
Using him as your support, your hands land on Logan‘s broad shoulders, leaning into him so you can properly ride on him. His eyes swell, becoming glazy while he lets you use him as you like. The room starts to fill with heavy pants from the both of you, low groans and slight whimpers. Your rhythm becomes faster with time, making your thighs tremble on his sides.
»Yeah, baby, jus‘ like that...«
Sharp fingernails digging into his scarred skin, making him groan in ecstasy. You near your orgasm, clenching around him as your light eyes find a bright edge to it, almost shining in the dimmed room. Logan catches the glimpse of it, hips bucking into your own unvoluntary.
That was enough to push you over the edge, feathers fluttering subtly as you cry out for him. Praises fall from his lips like a silent prayer, guiding you through the intense shockwave before you calm down. Settling against his shoulder, you hug him around his neck, releasing him from your long nails. Catching your breath, the room settles into a comfortable silence before he speaks up.
»Tired yet?« »Not for long.«
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a/n: Sorry this came out short, I don't usually write for X-Men, but lately..... Anyway, thanks for reading and I apologise for making it short.
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athelind · 3 days ago
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Well said. After my initial round of angry reblogs, I started slowly reaching the same conclusions.
When I heard about that election day spike in Google searches on "Did Biden drop out?", yeah, my white liberal upbringing had some nasty knee-jerk reactions, but it also started me thinking about just how utterly overwhelmed someone would have had to be to have missed the major news story of the last three months.
I work at a computer all day, and I spend around half my workday with the local news radio station playing in the background. I skim Tumblr and chat on my tiny little Discord echo chamber, that is a position of privilege.
Those of us in stable, middle-class jobs don't have any idea how badly the inflation of the last few years have hurt people living on the edge. Me? My savings account isn't in the shape I would like it to be, but all my bills are paid, and that is a position of privilege.
When you're barely hanging onto that edge, sometimes, you just want CHANGE. And sometimes, you just want to punish the people in power.
Ask not how the people have failed the nation; ask how the nation has failed the people.
things we need to address:
gen z men getting pulled into alt-right pipelines through andrew tate, joe rogan, elon musk, jordan peterson etc
the gullibility and stupidity of half the country voting against our collective best interests
the broad effect social media has on public and common good
lazy minds and lack of empathy
outside-country interference (trump and elon’s connections to russia and the amount of bots from other countries spreading misinformation)
the long-term effects of AI and rampant disinformation
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crimsoncandy04 · 2 days ago
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OH MY GOD YOU WRITE SO FUCKING GREAT!!!! Can I ask for a mouse/hamster hybrid reader and Kitty/Scaramouche. He's trying to catch us and eat us 😏 👅
Can I stick to canon a little? I might not be very imaginative so I usually work with lore and stuff to make my ideas flow a little easier for me.
And I think I know how to do this.
It was no secret that the harbinger known as The Doctor often tampered with human DNA in order to succeed in certain projects regarding his segments. However as one of his subordinates, you became increasingly concerned when he started involving animal DNA too.
And terrified when he picked YOU out of everyone else to undergo a sort of surgical transformation to see if weaker humans could be physically "improved" with animal genetics.
You went to sleep on the operating table, a woman.
You woke up in a similar body, however your eyes widened in shock as you noticed the rounded ears and long tail you had. You were in a small box sized room full of reflective walls. And in them you could see that you were now in fact a mouse and human hybrid.
You tried to yell but only squeaked.
However the experiment was far from over.
One of the tall reflective walls suddenly retracted into the ground. Revealing a long dark corridor made entirely of stone. The narrow walls Rose high into the shadows and as you stepped out the the tiny place you had woke up in, the opening slammed shut behind you too. Leaving you in the darkness of the weird maze/labyrinth all alone.
Or so you thought.
Suddenly a sharp tone cut through the cool air.
"Oh so you DID survive. Congratulations I suppose. But don't think this makes you any more of a useless pawn dear."
A figure leapt down from the top of one of the higher walls behind you.
His indigo eyes glowed. Marked by beautiful long lashes and striking red eyeliner. He looked so...catty and you'd definitely be right about that.
The young man's big fluffy tail suddenly began to swish behind him as he stalked closer to you slowly.
"now don't move, mouse. This is only going to be uncomfortable if you make it that way." His big fluffy ears twitched a little with excitement as he suddenly tried to reach out and grab you.
However you were faster than you remembered now.
And you ran.
Sprinting through the dim maze of nothing but more long stretches of hallways and sharp turns, you could hear the man in pursuit of you.
Every time you thought you put some distance between you both, you'd see a flash or indigo hair out of the corner of your eye and force yourself to keep going as he seemed to be able to scale walls and leap from high places just like a cat effortlessly could.
Finally you felt fear overwhelm you. And you panicked.
And you tripped.
Hands descended upon your shivering body before you could even muster up a scream. Lips silencing you as the man gently rolled you over onto your back and pinned you beneath him.
"you're fast my little mouse. But not faster than me~" he mumbled in a strangely seductive tone as he moved his lips down your body and stopped just above your pubic mound.
"please don't hurt me!" You wail. Your body shaking as you watched a devious grin appear on his rather lovely face.
"keep begging, mouse. You look even more delectable when you do~" you noticed something strange about his hands then as he ripped your panties off. His fingers resembled those of a doll. He wasn't human or cat...
Was this the sixth harbinger that was rumored to occasionally help out The Doctor?
You didn't have time to ponder this as you feel him dig his nails into your knees and force your legs apart as he leaned in closer to your sex and gave your clit a small kiss before roughly shoving his long tongue deep into your aching cunt.
"ah~ please stop! Please this feels so...good~" your body continued to shiver but not out of fear as you felt him moan and purr against your pussy. You felt a tiny squeak leave your lips then. Making his eyes take on a predatory gleam as he pulled you against his face even more and began to alternate between lapping at your heat and teasing your clit with his sharp teeth and cool tongue.
He kept you on edge for the longest time. Seemingly enjoying your taste as you felt his purring get louder while you rocked your hips a little and felt your lower body tighten.
"don't fight it. Just let go little mouse ~" he hummed. You felt so good at that moment that all sense of shame seemed to have been lost as your body erupted and you squirt into the eager mouth of the man before you. He greedily slurps up every last drop and hungrily swallows your lewd juices as you lay panting and completely drained before him.
You struggle to sit up as you feel him pull away finally. Only to see him give you another sadistic and horny grin as he looks you directly in the eyes and starts counting.
You immediately feel nervous again.
Quickly getting to your feet and running away as he neared the final number.
You didn't know how long he planned to draw this out or why he was so hungry for you like this, but one thing was for certain. He would continue to hunt you.
And you would be devoured.
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mochinomnoms · 2 days ago
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I think about other potential characters flr PTM and I feel like PTM! Malleus can be so silly yet angsty at the same time. Like during the gargoyle research club,Yuu will just be overwhelmed by Mall's thoughts of gargoyles/structures and their history of it. Yet when they have their alone time together like strolling around abandoned buildings,Mall's thoughts are just angsty or thinking of a future with yuu. Like how their relationship affects Briar Valley and how their citizens view humans in general and now a human might be their potential queen. Or most commonly the fact that you'll eventually pass before Mall. Maybe you'll leave with a heir or maybe you won't who knows. Maybe over the course of his courtship with you him and Vil/Yev are trying to work on a potion to slow down/extend the lifespan of human life. As its their that or he puts you to sleep like Silver when he was a child,stopping the aging process from happening to you. However his other thoughts are fond memories with you. Memories of a future with you. Or ones with the peoples he's closest with,mainly Diasomia,as they all care for him (as they care for him not only because he's their responsibility as future ruler of Briar valley,but as an actual friend)
Sorry for my rant,just wanted to word vomit out PTM Malleus thoughts 🏃‍♂️
No thank you for sharing! I honestly didn't have any thoughts about Malleus in PTM I almost immediately struck him off the list cause I wanted him to play a different role in the story, so it's so nice to hear someone else's ideas!
Seeing how Book 7 is going at the moment, I think I probably would've made a PTM story with Malleus a lot more angsty, but I honestly don't have very much to share for him, you have a lovely brain tho I love your thoughts on how his story might've gone!
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arlathen · 1 day ago
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one of my dear friends finished veilguard today and they were like "yeah i fought solas and he went into the fade kicking and screaming" and i was like. oh dude i forgot that not everyone is having a cathartic quasi-mythological romantic reunion at that point in the game. like there are people who still want to hurt him after learning everything he's gone through and done and why. they don't see him looking wet and pathetic and feel an overwhelming urge to hold him tight and rub his back. absolutely insane cannot relate.
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