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f10werfae · 2 years ago

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Small Big Big Lovin

Pairing: Husband!Chris x Short!Wife!Reader

Summary: Fans recount the best things they’ve seen about Y/n and Chris' loving relationship

- Requests are open!

Likes, Comments and Re-blogs are appreciated♥️

Chris Evans Masterlist💫:

Full Masterlist✨:

Taglist Form🌟:

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@/lemonsqueezy: Anyone see the mirror selfie Chris posted of him and Y/n, his arms wrapped around her with her jumping onto him like a koala😭😭 AND THIS MAN WAS NOT TRYING TO HIDE HIS HANDS ON HER ASS (Can’t blame him tho)

@/Whosaidso: Chris said on his newest press tour interview that every morning their kids barge into their room to have Y/n do their hair. Anyone else cryin?

> @/spiderwomantt: OK BUT R WE IGNORING THAT HE LITERALLY CALLS HIS OWN KIDS THE COCKBLOCKERS

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@/Evanslovesass: My aunt got to interview Y/n on the red carpet and apparently she’s so much smaller in real life🥹 Chris literally had to act as her bodyguard because people would bump into her cus they couldn’t see her

> @/buckystanners: AT ONE POINT YOU CAN SEE HIM JUST CARRYING HER THROUGH THE PEOPLE

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@/princeofasgard: I just saw Chris and Y/n out doing the grocery shopping and this man was just watching his wife struggle to reach the lucky charms on the top shelf

> @/hungryhipposusa: WELL DID HE HELP HER?!

>> @/princeofasgard: YEAH BUT SHE LIT HAD TO BEG HIM LMFAO

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@/yourmomsmom: if yall think you have a chance with Chris then you’re wrong, the guys absolutely smitten with Y/n as if she’s God on Earth /gen

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@/henrycavillishubby: Yall remember when Y/n revealed that she met Chris because she was a trainee hair stylist who was working with another stylist, and the reason they started talking to each other is because he wouldn’t leave her tf alone. Poor gyal

> @/sticksonbricks: Don’t forget that the only girl he lets deal with his hair is Y/n now, HE SAYS ITS HERS ONLY TO TOUCH AND TO PULL WTF

>> @/marvelousshulk: Why are we surprised they have like a gajillion kids

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@/hornymackiebarnes: Anthony Mackie really just clowned Chris evans because anytime wants to Chris wants to kiss Y/n he has to bend his neck or she has to use a stool😭☠️☠️

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@/tomhollandsleftnipple: OKAY BUT CHRIS DYING Y/NS HAIR ON LIVE WAS THE CUTEST THING EVER, HE WAS SO WORRIED SHE WOULDNT LIKE IT N KEPT STEALIN KISSES FROM HER. IM SLEEPIN ON THE HIGHWAY TONIGHT

>> @/Ynshairfollicle: and when baby Izzy came in the middle of it to sit on Y/n's lap, I swear she’s an exact double of Chris

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@/celebsgoferal: ALERT JUST SAW CHRIS EVANS FULL ON FRENCHING WITH Y/N UNDER A TREE IN MY LOCAL PARK AND HE WAS NOT HOLDIN BACK😍😭😭 GOD IT FELT WEIRD

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@/Dcandmarvel101: I just met Y/n Evans at my work and she’s actually the sweetest woman alive, she even tipped me so well!! Chris came to pick her up and wouldn’t even let her pay for her own nails since apparently he picked the colour for them. I hate it here.

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@/nocolourjustfaxandprinter: Anyone see Chris Evans camera roll, there that meme of a massive plug going into a phone’s charging socket, god bless Y/n for real

>@/socksontoes: Babes she’s living her best life, SHES GIVING HIM HIS BIG BOSTON FAMILY

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@/Giraffeshortneck: I was at a fireworks festival at my hometown in Massachusetts and saw the Evans couple snuggling while watching. Chris had Y/n inside his coat with him all zipped up, HE EVEN KEPT KISSING HER CHEEKS AND HEAD WTAF

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@/hiyageorgie: Chris calls Y/n his sweet girl. That’s it. That’s the tweet.

>@Y/nEvans: Fun fact I call him my bubba, something he actually used to call me when we first started dating

>>@/trinitysimpsonS: OMG SHE REPLIED TO YOU

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@/thexmenarehere: Who was going to tell me that Chris has a tattoo of Y/n's name with a kiss mark on his right pec, because her head always lands there when they sleep. I never knew I needed this information. I love it.

> @/lovememenot: And Y/n has a small cursive C tattooed on her hip. Saw it in one of her bikini shoots for her new clothing brand😭

>> @letsgetreadytobumble: OMG I THOUGHT I WAS THE ONLY ONE THAT NOTICED THAT BRO

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@/treetopshigh: That one video where in the background Y/n was cutting Chris’ hair and he had fallen asleep onto her chest midway, AND SHE KISSED HIS FOREHEAD TO WAKE HIM UP GENTLY

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@/brightandsunny: bro my sisters friend worked on the set as a stunt woman and she said Y/n is an amazing mother. SO HANDS ON AND TENDER LOVIN, AND CHRIS JUST CANT GET ENOUGH OF HIS OWN WIFE. ALWAYS HAS HIS HANDS ON HER. Safe to say she has her hands full.

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@/Freshwaterfish: I love that one video on Y/n's tiktok where she pranks Chris about wantin a surgery to make her taller, and this man went all soft trying to convince her that she was his “precious little goblin queen” NOT THE REACTION I WAS EXPECTING BUT SO WORTH IT

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@/sweetlovin: No one gonna mention about how when Y/n was pregnant Chris literally dropped all his projects and rushed home to be with her. Next thing we know she’s carrying triplets AND WITH HER SMALL FRAME, GOD BLESS HER FOR REAL. HER BACK IS GOING TO BE ACHING

>@/kristoffslevn: Chris did not cut her any slack☠️☠️ three mf babies

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@/dreeezzy: Chris with his kids is so adorable, because they’re small like Y/n was when she was little, HES ABLE TO CARRY ALL FOUR AT ONCE. Don’t even get me started on him putting his baby girls hair into pigtails while he was on his lunch break while filming. Or when they all missed Y/n so they all huddled up in his chair to face-time her while she was t at home cus she was heavily preggers

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@/Y/nEvans: Anyone got any tips on how to get a six foot man’s heavy ass head out of your boobs without wakin him up??

>@/ChrisEvans: They’re soft, warm and snuggly. Leave me alone.

>>@/Y/nEvans: They’re just tits 😭😭

>>>@/ChrisEvans: Yeah mine. What can I say? I’m a simple man with simple needs

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@/levelheadednoob: anyone else wonder how Y/n and Chris have ya know ;)) cus that woman is tiny and he is like six foot

>@/ChrisEvans: We get through it fine thank you, four kids and counting :

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Taglist Tags (Form to join is up there^^): @kimhtoo17 @itsaylayay1213 @evanstanwhore @mrspeacem1nusone @thereisa8ella @seren-a-ity @patzammit @pandaxnienke

#romance #chris evans imagine #chris evans x reader #chris evans fanfiction #chris evans #chris evans oneshot

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pocmuzings · 4 years ago

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hello hi , it is g , ur friendly local neighbourhood hindu indian ( as in south asian ) ! so a few people requested that i just make a guide-esque sorta thing on hindu indian characters ! im not really good at guides , so instead , these are just little things i’ve noticed or picked up on that could really potentially strengthen the next indian character u ( pretty please ! ) pick up !

disclaimer : i am writing this from my perspective and it is NOT definitive , nor do i speak on behalf of all hindu indians ! i am a 23-year-old bisexual cis female hindu indian , with one older gay brother, and a Train Wreck middle brother . my mother is from new delhi , and my father is from nairobi but has indian heritage ( not sure which part of india bc he’s an Engima ) . i have extended family in india and have visited india about 10-15 times throughout my entire life .

so firstly , im so glad u all are here and want to write more hindu indian characters ! please please do so ! i hope this helps , encourages u , and isnt too confusing !!

psa : i need everyone to know that this is a very basic ‘ guide ‘ and theres a lot it DOESNT touch on or address bc i didnt want to get too Extensive and Detailed and have people Turn off and not Read it . this is just written in the terms of hopefully helping build character / be relevant to characters a bit better that ive employed into writing my OWN hindu indian character creations ! but if u have any other questions pls reach out to me or any other indians in the rpc and im sure we’ll try our best to assist u !

FCS:

one thing i’d really like to say is that its great to see fcs like dev patel , deepika padukone and avan jogia picked up every now and then in rps , but there’s actually a LOT of other indian fcs you could be and should be using ! the main reason people don’t seem to know them is because they’re not ‘ hollywood ‘ stars per se ( it was a super big deal when pr*yanka broke out of bollywood and into bollywood but we don’t talk about her on this Blog ) . they’re usually bollywood stars and i don’t really see bollywood discussed that much in the rpc !

if you’re after MORE indian fcs , i have a tag of indian females here , and indian males here . the fcs on my blogs are also not ALL that exist . there are plenty of other blogs out there that post indian fcs , such as sonamhelps & bollymusings !!! there’s also some really great faceclaim directories out there that include a LOT of indians with resources !

unfortunately , i do not know of any trans indians or nonbinary indians but that doesn’t mean they don’t exist . indian cultures and beliefs are still quite Old School and not super progressive . india only just had it’s first wlw mainstream bollywood film released last year . lgbtqia+ issues are NOT really spoken about in india or within indian families at ALL , and if they are - they’re usually dismissed or reacted to Very Very Badly . ( again this isnt definitive and im sure and hopeful that some indians have had GREAT coming out stories and been accepted by their families but this has not been a common thing ive seen or witnessed from my cousins my age , indian friends , myself and my brother who are lgbtqia + )

FOOD :

we do eat with our hands and we eat like PROS with our hands . we can shovel it so easily and quickly . i don’t know how to describe it but you use the first three fingers of your hand to place the Food there , and then use your thumb to kinda scoop it off and into your mouth . this is NOT unhygienic because indians wash their hands very regularly and most of the time we aren’t actually touching our mouths to our hands !

indian food is MADE to be eaten with your hands for the most part . it is literally NOT practical to eat food with a knife and fork . here’s a really great article explaining things more in depth re: indian food and using our hands !

cows are seen as Very holy beings in hindu indian culture , and for that reason - there isn’t a lot of beef being eaten or consumed. sure , some indians DO eat beef but i don’t think its super common, but in my personal experience as a non-beef-eater this results in A LOT of me asking ‘ oh , sorry what sauce does that pasta come with ? ‘ ‘ oh those are beef sausages ? sorry i can’t eat them ‘ etc etc . beef is in a LOT of things , and this makes me very very careful and almost pedantic about what i do eat and ask about , food wise !

indian food is seen as stinky by a majority of white people . it has a very very strong smell as im sure u know , and opening ur lunch box as a little kid to a Curry or Dal ur mum has made u ? one way street to being bullied . i also remember a time a real estate agent continuously told my dad nobody was interested in buying our house bc it smelled too much like curry,�� despite my mum not having cooked curry in Weeks ( just say what u Really mean , bitch ! )

indian curry exists but so does dal / daal . this is curry-like dish that is usually made out of lentils . so if ur going to talk about indian food and u know curries and samosas . . pls also bring up dals . and sabji ! ( sabji is usually just boiled vegetables plopped together . a lot of potato usually )

desserts are what we call Indian Sweets . this is stuff that is usually very VERY sugary and a bit of an accustomed taste . theyre very colourful and LOOK beautiful but even i , for one , can not eat many indian sweets bc they are a Lot of Sweet and Sugar . examples of indian sweets that u can google : gulab jamun , burfi , rasgulla , jalebi etc . here’s a great link for more !

give me spiced food or give me death . literally . . put some cumin in . . put some garam masala . . put some chillies . . flavour ur Food for my Indian Taste Buds

FAMILY :

if you are the oldest son of an Indian Family . . congratulations . you are now the Head of the family and must carry every weight and burden alone . it is extremely isolating and taxing on you ( my dad is the oldest indian son , and also - so is my eldest brother , obvs ) . there is a LOT that is expected of you to do . you are expected to quite literally run the family and be the ‘ man of the house ‘ by yourself .

if you are a daughter . . . even BIGGER congratulations ! you are basically a maid to every male or guest who EVER comes over to your house . you must be a Hostess , you must be in the kitchen cooking , serving snacks, bringing tea , and then washing up and basically waiting on Hand and Foot . you will not be included into a lot of dialogue or engaged in a lot of conversation and TRUST ME ! THAT WILL GRIND UR GOD DAMN GEARS IN THE 21ST CENTURY !

if you are a boys’ boy ( aka straight and Sporty ) , then congrats ! you get it the easiest : you are the favourite of every social event . the uncles and cousins love talking to you and dude-ing it up with you , and the aunts fawn over you and think you’re the Best Thing since sliced bread . sit back , put your feet up , and expect to be treated like a God. you can do absolutely no wrong . ( my middle brother is this to a T and listen . . he’s been in and out of jail for physical violence and ab*se for over 5 years . and family still FROTH over him . my teeth are gritted to dust thinking of this again )

indian aunties are lethal . they gossip like teenage girls . they will find out everything . they will bitch behind your back . they can NOT be trusted .

everyone is ur uncle or aunt, sister or brother . literally everyone . ur cousin ? no. thats ur sister . ur dads friend ? no , thats ur uncle . you will call them as such . EVERYONE is family .

family is in general a VERY BIG THING in indian culture , too . ‘ what will it Look like to everyone else if we don’t all arrive together ? ‘ my dad usually asks dskjdfjn . it’s all about Looking Right and Standing As A United Front . that being said , indian family has undying and unwavering loyalty for one another , they just show it in a very Weird way .

FASHION:

female hindu indian formal clothes are usually really embroidered to hell and back and this makes them very scratchy , uncomfortable, and HEAVY . you aren’t running anywhere anytime soon in a full blown lehenga or saree

most ‘ modern ‘ hindu indian women do not wear full Indian Clothes all the time . some do , but usually it’s a lot of wearing a kurti tunic with jeans , or just normal everyday clothing . again , this is going to be different based on which parts of india your character is from , though !

usually , older women and married women wear traditiona hindul indian clothing quite often . i know my mum wore a sari AT HOME everyday when i was growing up, until i was like 13 and took her shopping with me to get something Else to wear .

bindi’s just stick right onto ur forehead but they do fall off a lot , especially when ur wearing makeup or sweating . again , you don’t need to wear a bindi everyday , unless thats ur preference . i usually only wear them for festivals . ( festivals means indian celebrations , not like . . coachella ((which u should not be wearing a bindi to , if ur not indian fyi )) )

male formal clothes are usually just literally anything Formal and buttoned up for the most part , and u can get away with that , or you can wear a really nice kurta

indians wear white at funerals , not black ( not sure if this should go in the fashion section but this entire thing is being organised into a Mess by now anyways ) . you CAN wear black to a funeral of course , but its common to wear white !

DATING ( tw’s for islamaphobia ):

modern day indian / desi fuck boys exist and my god they are Something Else . hasan minhaj did a really good piece about this and explaining them to a T ( starts at 1:43 )

( THIS IS THE POINT THAT WILL MENTION ISLAMAPHOBIA AND HOMOPHOBIA ! ) basically according to Older indians , , ur dating options in 2020 go like this ( if ur a cis female like me ) : hindu indian men are god tier , white men are Not Okay But I Guess So Bc We Have To Accept They’re Everywhere , females / being lgbtqia+ is not Taken Seriously , and muslims are literally not even close to being an option or Accepted . again this isn’t definitive but based on a lot of indian media i’ve consumed and seen how they portray muslims in general as well as Dating Options , as well as talking to other indians , both who are older / traditional and hold these ideals , whereas Younger gens generally do NOT hold these ideals / actively are Against these backwards ideals. i remember when i was in year 6 and had my first boyfriend . . he was a muslim and my dad FLIPPED the FUCK out . it’s not even that i was dating someone / young / his only daughter . . it was mainly because i was dating a muslim . again , this is a very OLD SCHOOL and traditional way of thinking and it is NOT CORRECT . pls don’t take this as a note to be islamaphobic if u write an indian character bc . . thats literally the opposite of what im trying to tell u here .

yeah arranged marriages are definitely still a thing for us , even now in 2020

YES if u are an unmarried / single indian ( ESPECIALLY if ur a woman ) about to enter ur 30s . . ur in DANGER and u are the black sheep and theres probably something Wrong With You bc why are u still single ?

TRADITIONS / BELIEFS / SUPERSTITIONS :

idk if its just me and my family but we are SUPER superstitious . if you say anything like ‘ he hasnt gotten sick in years !’ immediately , everyone knocks on wood or their head . if you were planning on leaving the house and sneeze ? thats bad luck , stand and wait for five minutes then u can leave . we have a strong belief in drishti , or alternatively : The Evil Eye , and making sure we don’t invite it into our lives . a lot of our prayers are about warding drishti away .

the evil eye is kinda Complicated but basically its an ill-wishing upon an unsuspecting person . if somebody is jealous of you or angered by you , they may wish upon you or cast upon you the Evil eye ( or even just glare at u whilst ur not looking and thats Big Bad ) .

a lot of older indians , like older people in general i guess , are not super progressive or Open . this isnt ALWAYS the case but older indians can be very very stubborn in their beliefs in what is Right and Wrong , Normal and Not Normal

theres a LOT of hindu indian festivals and events ! tbh too many for me to even keep up with . but without fail at least once a year ill say to ONE of my friends ‘ oh sorry i cant make it . i have an indian Thing on that day ‘ and its usually about a festival , so pls be aware that there are a LOT of indian festivals and if ur writing an indian character , its perfectly understandable and Relatable for them to say they can’t make it to a party or hang out with their friends that night , for that very reason !

the main / most popular ( ? ) festivities that i personally do celebrate every year without fail are :

diwali ( the festival of lights , celebrating goddess lakshmi roaming the earth . in my household this is usually turning on literally every single light and lighting candles and fireworks / sparklers and saying some prayers , and eating a formal dinner all together ! )

holi ( the festival of colours . celebrating victory and love . again personally for me , this was usually celebrated at the temple with all of us Kids running around throwing paint on each other ! )

rakhi / raksha bandhan ( a day of sisters celebrating their brothers . you tie a rakhi which is usually a bracelet / holy string around your brothers wrist , feed them some food , pray for their wellbeing and in return they gift you something . in my case, i usually get money from them ) .

navratri / durga puja ( 9 nights and 10 days of celebrations but tbh u don’t have to do all the days . or i mean . . i don’t . i fast one day from morning to night and then i slide on over to boogie and dance dandiya which is literally the MOST FUN dance ever bc its based off some Historical Fight and u go faster and faster and keep going until ur absolutely SPENT bc u dont wanna lose ur place in the circle )

there are SO MANY HINDU INDIAN GODS too . and so many prayers to all of them and to just general Life Wellness . chances are that ur character will know at least ONE aarti / gazal / prayer off by heart and have sung it at least 30 times in a monotone voice . the ones i know off by heart bc ive had to sing them 3000 times ? om jai jagdish hare , & the gayatri mantra

GENERAL LIL THINGS I DIDN’T KNOW HOW TO CATEGORISE ( tw’s for skin whitening , colorism and classism ) :

( THIS IS THE POINT THAT NEEDS A TW FOR SKIN WHITENING AND COLORISM ) lets hold indians accountable right now : we advertise SKIN LIGHTENING CREAM . i think they finally stopped that earlier this year / due to BLM ( i’m not entirely sure / could be wrong ) , but thats literally how bad it is , that we would openly advertise and encourage people to literally bleach their skin rather than look darker .

( THIS IS THE POINT THAT NEEDS A TW FOR COLORISM AND CLASSISM ) colorism is a BIG thing in india and usually linked to class . generally speaking , the people who are Darker Skinned are usually people who work outside / labourers or homeless even , and are therefore seen as lower class / bottom class . the lighter skin you have , the more privileged and advantaged you are bc ur seen as working a Good job out of the sun and having a home . it’s incredibly classist as well as just generally Fucked Up . why am i telling u this ? mainly so u understand the importance of using a dark skinned indian fc vs a light skinned indian fc which i know is hard , bc a lot of darker skinned indians arent in hollywood / have resources , but its still something to Think About .

i have a long Ethnic name . literally my first name is 10+ letters , which i know doesnt seem that long Necessarily but its also a Super Ethnic name with e’s and and j and n . it Flows and Sounds very clearly different from a christian name . it is VERY important to me that my name be said Correctly because i’ve spent so much time having it said incorrectly or Westernised . i also know a lot of indians my age who ( like me ) have had to dramatically shorten their REAL first name ( which is usually also pretty long . not always , but it is Common ) , to fit their name into white people’s mouths better . please put some thought into ur indian characters name !

not all indians speak hindi ! hindi is one of MANY dialects within india . there is also tamil , urdu , bengali , punjabi , telugu and SO many more , so pls research which part of india ur character / their family is from bc hindi won’t always be the default language for them !

not every indian is hindu ! of course ur character doesnt have to be religious at all , bc if im being honest IM barely religious but my FAMILY is and this is smth u should think abt bc religion is a pretty big thing for indians . so even if ur character isnt hindu , they were probably raised with SOME religious beliefs . have a think about which religions they would have been brought up with ! there’s a very large percentage of practicing muslims , sikhs and buddhists too ! and even christianity !

WRITING WISE / CREATING AN INDIAN CHARACTER WISE :

the first step should be to consume indian media ! listen to indian music . watch bollywood movies ! theres SO MANY out there on everyone’s netflix . if u want some recs , let me know and i can try my best to find smth for u ! if u want smth thats Hollywood-indian . . . Hasan Minhaj is great to watch , especially his episodes on indian culture / politics , and Never Have I Ever on netflix was rlly good / relatable for me personally as an indian growing up in a western society !

i would really really love to see more indian rep in general , but i’d also like to discuss the Stereotypes that ive seen indians portrayed as in mainstream hollywood media :

indian women as soft spoken and subservient beings who are abused by their husbands and have no say in anything

heterosexuality within indian relationships and indian dating

indian men as sleazy

indians in general not being seen as Sexy or Sexual beings with any sex drive at all

Stumbling , Stuttering , Nerdy awkward messes of men who don’t know how to interact with anybody they find sexually appealing

an indian character that everybody ( usually white ) finds Uncomfortable and Weird and is seen as usually the Butt of the joke .

i think those mentioned above could be helpful in how to plan your next indian character and think about how to SUBVERT a trope theyre often portrayed as , or create an indian thats not stereotypical !

so what and who SHOULD you write ?

an indian character who is proudly and openly gay , or bi

a trans or nonbinary indian ( PLEASE ! )

an indian character with really super accepting parents and family

an aromantic indian

an indian who is focused on their career first and not their dating life

a fuckboy / fuckgirl ( honestly . . i’d love to see it )

a indian character who is a party animal

an outspoken indian female who takes no shit and is strong in every sense of the word

a confident , smooth talking indian businessman who is Sexy and Lusted After ( not in a gross christian grey way but just . i’d love to see indian characters seen as Sexy . not in a fetishy way , either , but just because it’d be a nice change in pace ! )

a character who IS traditional / religious but also very progressive and forward thinking in their beliefs

honestly just any character that isnt whats mentioned above

#guide #writing help #rph #rpc #islamaphobia tw #colorism tw #classism tw #idk if this is any good and i was very uncomfortable putting in the part abt how a lot of older indians feel abt muslims #but i mean . . lets just call it the fuck out bc its Gross Behaviour so lets call it out and work to change it #anyways every trigger is tagged super clearly in every point that talks abt it #i kept those parts Brief and as Direct and Honest as possible #pls let me know if u need me to tag anything #and lastly . . . pls write indian characters !!!!

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shidiand · 6 years ago

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How do you imagine Tenco's Story ending in your head?

that is a GREAT but UNEXPECTED QUESTION freshlybaked "spider" bread and i'm really happy to have the opportunity to try and answer this ageless question that has burned within all of us in the tenco's story iv waiting room community since 2013. it is an incredible coincidence (or is it? 👀) that i was just talking to Risa about tenco's this (edit: yesterday) morning so i am extra double super in the mood to talk about Tenco's Story today. so excellent of a coincidence is this that i am tempted to refer you to them in case you wanted to hear their thoughts on the matter that would probably turn out super cool, but that is neither here nor there; let us talk Tenco's Story.

i of course must mention my unadvertised and modestly detailed commentary on tenco's i-iii at https://shidiand.tumblr.com/tencos, presenting slightly interesting facts in an unwieldy and difficult-to-use format, but as it dates back to june 2017, i want to take some time to understand my feelings about the series once more.

tenco's story is a series that has a lot of meaning to me.

i took on my current name of shidiand in november of 2013. i was still in 11th grade at the time, 4th year of high school, and a very socially isolated person. i should say i was introduced to touhou in 7th grade, 2010, so i was still working through a 3 years-strong phase of trying to simultaneously both find an outlet for and bottle up an endless wellspring of awkward weeaboo-gamer nerd energy at the time.

i had my first real foray onto the internet in 2010, tried out twitter, followed some RPers and other people who had Cool Touhou Usernames. didn't really go anywhere. i had maybe 50 followers, i dont really know the count but it was definitely a) double digits and b) pretty low. didn't know what to tweet about. didn't know how to hit it off with others. i think there was basically maybe only 3 other people i ever properly interacted with. oh shit i was playing league of legends at the time. oh my god. i really did play league of .. oh my god. let's move on.

aw shit im super digressing amn't i. well.

this is just how it goes when i write essays on tumblr.com.

i'm afraid you're just along for the ride at this point so please do your best to enjoy it.

i got kind of tired of twitter at the time because i didnt know what to do with it. didnt know how to interact with people and didnt find the people i was following interesting, so i ghosted on out of there by the end of 2012. didnt deactivate it until like 2015 but at that point that was just burning away my dark history. anyways. november 2013.

--im taking a lot of time here trawling through old files on my computer, my tumblr blog, notification emails still lying around in my gmail inbox from twitter, the dropbox i didn't actually use but it had several tenco's story pictures on it but i deleted them so this was useless, ... to trace the timeline of this story and im really seeing a lot of remnants of dark history here you know? did you know i wrote a letter to a girl i had a crush on valentine's day 2014, slipped it into her locker, and anxiously hung around nearby at lunchtime to see how she reacted at lunchtime? i certainly didn't, or at least i made darn ass sure to forget about this incredible virgin incident and not remember it, ever, until i came across the records of it that i thoughtfully preserved for the me of 5 years later today. ok well now i have to read the letter to see if it was as bad as it just sounded there brb

ok so the good news is that it was actually very focused on being positive and full of admiration for the cool things she did instead of being a confession letter so i am very glad i was able to be a respectful chad 5 years ago, but the bad news is that the jokes, the actual sentences i put together. oh my god. but i mean. well. at least i got the spirit. its certainly a step up from this other person in my grade, WEEABOO ANDREW, YOU MAY RECALL THIS STORY AND HIS NAME FROM PREVIOUS STORYTIMES, THE MAN THE MYTH THE LEGEND who came to school on halloween once cosplaying kirito from sword art online and got very possessive about people asking if they could hold his black replica plastic sword, and probably worse, dropped a "will you be my girlfriend" letter into the locker of my homie and fellow trombonist samantha, who was a little bit nerdy, hung out with the anime-likers who were actually sociable and fun to be around so you can imagine why weeaboo andrew was into her, which had i) a direct quotation from SAO chapter 16.5 (origin of the famous "glopping noise" line), and ii) a condom. jesus christ. i dont want to talk about this any more. next topic.

i also put this drawing of iku nagae and her skarmory (actually an albinoss from 18 DRAGONS) on the other side of the letter because it was the coolest thing i could think of drawing at the time. and i completely agree with 2014 me because it IS super fucking cool. hell fuckin yeah

https://shidiand.tumblr.com/post/76301993387/iku-nagae-ft-that-thing-that-supposedly-is-a

alright that was a fun little trip down memory lane but lets get back on track. november 2013. i started anew as shidiand. still awkward, still learning how to express myself and looking for my place among others. i followed some touhou bloggers, hung around r/touhou a lot as well. in december i got my first tablet for christmas, a wacom bamboo splash. i still use this thing! the usb cable disconnects if you bump it so i have to find just the perfect position to sit in whenever i want to draw, but its served me well. anyways. i was just starting to play around with digital art but i remember, probably just before new years, for some reason i wanted to find out more about tenshi hinanawi (i don't remember why. tenshi wasn't even one of my favourite characters at the time) so i went googling and right there on zerochan i found this:

https://www.pixiv.net/member_illust.php?mode=medium&illust_id=23525572

this was during my dark souls phase so i just went BANANAS at the sight of this. this was literally the coolest image i had ever seen in my internet life. That image alone made me want to draw in hopes that I could make something as cool as that someday.

it wasn't immediately after but i soon discovered tenco's story, and it was love. kannnu was my very first artistic inspiration, and for a long time, my only one. i absolutely idolized them at the time. since then, ive found other artists to look up to, in a more healthy manner, but to this day i still look up to kannnu, still admire their work a lot.

i played around with drawing, followed the lives of people on tumblr, started reading touhou fanfiction, made a new twitter. i met a lot of new people along the way. some people i havent stuck with, some i cut ties with, and some people i still keep in contact with today. over those long 5 years of being shidiand, i found a name (i used to use shidian and then shid, but someone called me shidi once and i realized that was a lot better), how to reach out to others, how to express myself, places that i could feel included in. this is why i owe a blood debt to evelyn, who permitted me to kneel at her throne and was like "yea ok you can join my discord server u seem cool". evelyn, if you were confused by me ominously mentioning this blood debt/blood oath in a tumblr reply 1-2 years ago, this is the context. those 5 years were like a coming of age of sorts, that i never had when i was in high school.

and my love for tenco's story, that inspired me to draw that day, has been with me since almost the very beginning of my time as shidiand. from the beginning, i have always encouraged people to READ TENCO'S STORY, like the kin of those who cry PLAY MELTY or WATCH SYMPHOGEAR. i think my very first sidebar description was something akin to a prayer, written in very choral language, hoping for the day tenco's story iv was completed, ..., "meanwhile, furious shitposting". kannnu's work, finding delight in whatever they chose to draw, has been at my side, all along. my true mentor, my guiding moonlight...

so that's why i still to this day love tenco's story so much.

let's talk about tenco's story.

tenco's story is a story told through single pictures. the plot is vague, and details are sparse. dialogue is rare. we only know what has happened; we seldom know why. furthermore, there are many gaps between scenes that the reader is left to fill in for themselves; we see only snapshots that form an hazy outline of the events that occurred, and must imagine the rest. motivations and explanations fail me. but even with a barebones plot, tenco's story has themes, and if nothing else, those have to be carried through.

the main theme, of course, is journey and travel, but there are also other ideas, too. i actually think they start to change as the series goes on:

book i, where tenshi runs away from home, is about striking out on your own. it's a very fun and unpredictable journey, together with a friend.

book ii, where tenshi and iku are separated, forces tenshi to find and rely on companions of her own even more. but they do so, and they are able overcome hardships, and there is food and festival.

book iii marks a climax, reasserting tenshi's goal of finding the sword of hisou. i feel like the journey shifts from a travel (visiting) to a path forwards (making your way through). perhaps this is just something i get from knowing the locations from dark souls (Anor Londo, New Londo Ruins, the Great Hollow), but the locations start to give more of a sense of verticality, like they're emphasizing tenshi's climb to the summit. the hardships and enemies are the greatest they've been yet, and right when they near the top, tenshi and iku start to bleed. the book ends on an uncertain note.

if i had to describe the type of journey and travel that tenshi and iku undertake, there's this sense of wonder at discovering new places, wandering from vista to vista in delight, but also a sense of conquering, making it through a difficult patch. the sequence from pages 2-44 to 2-51, taken together, convey this sense of overcoming the best. it's one of my favourite parts. again, although the tone definitely starts to lean towards struggle in book iii, i think tenco's sense of wonder really is the heart of the series. there's no map of the world, no predicting where tenshi and iku will end up next. and through their travels, though they come across many enemies, they also find friends -- places of refuge, places full of life, people who will look after them for a few days, companions who will stay with them for the rest of the journey. at the end of book iii, we see a long haired tenshi with purple hair being impaled by the sword of hisou (3-33, see also this extra illustration that risa pointed out to me http://sinnnkai.blog.fc2.com/blog-entry-195.html), and regular short haired tenshi continuing on her journey (3-42). if we ignore the out-of-story images where tenshi has the sword of hisou, tenshi has actually only ever used her sunlight blade (2-24, 3-26, etc), so i think that the long haired tenshi on 3-33 is a different person altogether. (if i had to guess, she might be the purple haired woman in the top left of https://www.pixiv.net/member_illust.php?mode=medium&illust_id=35443328 as we have never seen that woman appear anywhere.) she probably has something to do with the flashbacks at the end of book ii and she might somehow be short-haired tenshi at the same time, but this is just speculation.

however, in 3-43, tenshi's hair is rather blue, so i don't know if this is the purple haired woman or not. if it is, tenshi is probably still fine and closing in on the summit, but if it isn't, then it's very worrying to see a picture of tenshi without any of her companions. it's very ominous.

meanwhile, iku, while climbing the red carpeted corridor, is stabbed, and disappears for a few pages. there's a black page, a shot of a shrine that strongly resembles the hakurei shrine, and a picture of iku standing behind someone in a tux, with the line "In the past, I was saved by the lady I was serving, you see?". and then iku wakes up in a field of flowers.

i think what this scene makes clear is a theme that has continued to appear and reappear throughout every book of "being saved, being aided by someone's kindness".

i think another theme that is implied and has to be addressed by this story of running away from home is "return". something im imagining is that the reason tenshi makes finding the sword of hisou her goal is because she wants to have something to prove herself with, to vindicate her when she comes home. but i don't think she needs to prove anything, and i ultimately think that she would be happier spending the rest of her life exploring.

so i think this should be what happens in the ending.

open on iku's journey, and give her a long sequence of travel without seeing tenshi. underline her newfound resolve. she climbs to the summit with albinoss, and finds the rest of tenshi's companions fallen. and in the last room is sword of hisou tenshi, who has lost herself, and it comes down to iku to bring her back. after a difficult battle, when both of them are on their last legs, iku is unable to stand any longer. but at this moment tenshi sees her companions struggling to get back up and reach her, and that's what brings her to her senses. and iku gets to see how many friends tenshi's been able to make on her own, and they finally and properly reunite. together, tenshi and iku carry each other out of the last room.

i don't think it's necessary to return to heaven. as a conclusion, dedicate some time to tenshi and iku travelling together. they're on their way back, revisiting old friends who helped them along the way, enjoying the journey. their last stop is the house of the elderly nawis (1-42). tenshi shows off the sword of hisou; she decided to keep it not as a trophy to show her family but as proof of the bonds of her companions. surrounded by friends, tenshi and iku decide to part ways with each other, knowing that the other will be alright. iku drifts among the clouds once more, and tenshi sets off for the horizon.

that's the plot that i'd write/just wrote. i don't really expect tenco's story iv to ever come out, though. i mentioned my first sidebar description earlier in this essay, but of course, you can see that it's been changed. 2 years ago, i read my hopeful prayer once more and was struck with a terrible melancholy, so now it reads this: "having come to terms with the fact that tenco's story iv will never be released, i can still live, knowing that the spirit of the journey will live on through kannnu's original works [...] meanwhile, furious shitposting".

on one level, tenco's story is a story, but in the process of following it, i came to think of the work itself as a journey too. you can constantly see kannnu's improvement between and even within each book. they have always drawn whatever they liked; what plot matters in the face of "I wanted to draw a beautiful sky." "I wanted to draw a fantastic battle." "I wanted to draw Dark Souls and Monster Hunter and Pokemon and Brave Fencer Musashi and Bokura no Taiyou and Touhou."

its not really kannnu's style to go back and tie up old ends. they just draw whatever makes them happy. so as i watch them continue to draw beautiful places and fantastic creatures, new characters heading out on journeys of their own or just enjoying their everyday lives, it's as if tenco's story never ended. the limits and consistency of that world ignored, and a new one springs up; in a way, the world of tenco's, which had such thin boundaries, just gets bigger.

but even so, having said all that, i still see them draw that short-haired tenshi from time to time. it makes me happy to see them remember tenco's story with such fondness. often crossing over with orion or roar or elweiss, you can see tenshi on another journey.

#tenco's story #freshlybakedspiderbread

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sharkeysnight · 6 years ago

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paramore?

How long have I listened to them? god. it’s really been ten years, huh

Favourite song: part ii. which is actually one of my Three Favorite Songs Of All Time, Ever, so that’s fun

Least Favourite song: i don’t really like be alone? also i think a few songs on all we know is falling are sort of boring but they get a pass for those on account of they were all like sixteen flksjdd

Favourite Album: after laughter and self titled hold equally important places in my heart but al probably wins by just a smidge

First song I’ve heard from them: it was a song on my cousin’s guitar hero game when i was like ten or eleven? it was either miz biz or crushcrushcrush but i dont remember which skdfjl

Have I ever Seen them in Concert? ya! not a Proper concert but i did go to see them on good morning america last year

Any merch I posess: a couple shirts, a record, and a poster

Favourite recorded concert, If available: oh fuck i have so many. bbc radio 1′s big weekend is fantastic, as is voodoo music festival, both from 2013. also like, anything from monumentour, yknow how it is. also im ridiculously fond of tiny desk concert?

Favourite Single/Music Video: idk abt singles but my fave music vids are now and hard times

Favourite Member, current: hayley. obviously & of course. but i’d be lying if i said i didnt have a huge soft spot for taylor as well

Favourite Former member(if available) lmao jeremy used to be my fave when i was eleven and pretending i was straight. meanwhile i was literally telling all my friends about how fantastic hayley was on a daily fckin basis

#thank u so much anon! i just asked somebody abt pmore actually lmao #Anonymous

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brod-anthropology · 4 years ago

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This weeks watch

-Twilight

banging, absolute masterpiece, the best one in the franchise.

-Rebecca

Incredibly good! It’s a classic story and they really stuck to it, they didn’t deviate too much and it was well acted. It was just really well done! The costumes were great and unexpected, like they were period accurate (as far as I can tell) but they weren’t the normal drab and dreary that they could’ve easily gone for. And honeslty OOF!! I could go on about how beautiful it was, the cinematography was *chefs kiss*. It helps that they had a great set but even so, the angles, the way they used colour and lighting, so good!!! Would defintily recommend.

-Megaconda

It was uhhh, interesting. Enjoyable. A classic in its own right, but maybe not the highest quality one. But no in all seriousness it’s not a serious film, it’s not even a B movie it’s like a C movie- but it’s fun! And that’s what counts, it was enjoyable and even if the camera work was terrible and the graphics, editing, acting, writing and story all left much to be desired you can’t really blame the film itself, it’s not serious and I enjoyed watching it!

-Sharknado

Now if we’re talking about masterpieces, you’ve found the right film. Alright camera quality, terrible continuity and downright awful but incredible acting, it’s the film of a generation. It’s fun and stupid and silly and it doesn’t really make sense, the plot is one entire plot hole but it’s enjoyable! The ridiculousness makes it worthwhile, if not for the terrible CGI and A+ plus action scenes. Really not a serious film but defintily a classic to watch, it really speaks for itself- it’s literally a film about a tornado full of sharks, what do you expect from a film with such a banging plot.

-Sharknado 2: the second one

It’s just Sharknado 2. That’s it. This time he’s in New York not LA and they try and give some backstory, but it’s just Sharknado 2. Actually I lied, Billy Ray Cyrus plays a surgeon for all of 4 minutes, and it’s the performance of his lifetime, and it’s not so painfully dominated by Cis White men (though they still have a govern, VERY heavy presence).

-Bearcano VS Nazi Sharks

Really, you don’t want to know. Not the best thing to ever be made.

-Black books

Classic! Favourite series! It’s about an Irish alcoholic who owns a bookshop and his best friend who runs a shop next door and the guy that he hired to help around, it’s a lot funnier than it sounds I promise, there’s nothing spectacular about the editing or the shots but it’s hilarious and it’s my favourite comedy series and defintily a comfort- the writing and visual gags are banging. it’s not particularly serious but has a certain early 2000s charm that I don’t think would be allowed to be written into a show nowadays. But yes! Bill bailey and Dylan Moran!

-Treasure Planet

Classic childhood film! Watched it with Ellie, she’d never seen it!! Honeslty I remember it being great as a kid and if anything it’s only better now I’m older and I get more of the references, I think it’s one of those hidden gems from that experimental period dreamworld and Disney had (you know like the prince of Egypt, Atlantis, ferngully, etc...). It’s just crazy cool! The attention to detail is amazing and so is the worldbuilding, the animation and cinematography is crazy and honeslty it deserves a live action remake so much more than the Lion King or the Jungle Book and you can’t convince me otherwise.

-the grinch

This is actually one of the few Christmas films I’ve seen and I watched it with Ellie whilst having our little farewell Christmas decoration meal thing together. It’s just a classic really, there’s not much to say- the costumes are amazing, I feel sorry for Jim Carrey for the hell he went through for that look, and the whole design of it is phenomenal.

-home alone

Never seen it before Ellie showed me and it’s surprisingly good! For some reason I’ve never seen it and my family avoided showing it to me but?? It’s not bad!! I see why people like it so much, I can imagine if you watched it when you were younger it would’ve had a real big nostalgia feel to it and it does stand the test of time fairly well. The writing is decent and the gags are funny, and it’s a bit of a feel good so it ticks all the boxes for an alright Christmas film.

-Staged

Very good! Another favourite! David tenant and Michael Sheen try and rehearse a play over zoom in lockdown, it’s very witty and well written and it’s very very cool to see how well they managed to work with the limited filming options and adapt it to actual zoom calls and such, like there’s very little in person bits and even then its clear that it was done on like a phone (or at least not a professional camera) and I just think it’s cool how well they managed to adapt a narrative to not only fit around how awkward working over video calls is but make the entire plot essentially be that. Plus I think its kind of a testament to how good the acting and writing/plot is, like the fact that it’s so good and about 85% of it happens via video calls just kind of shows that you don’t need flashy cameras and sets and costumes, they made it good just by focusing on the narrative and acting out what they could in character (I know they don’t play characters in the show but they’re like caricatures or characterised versions of themselves you know)

-the Christmas chronicles

Surprisingly! Another good Christmas film. Santa’s a bit if badass won’t lie, and it has very thing you need: Santa in a leather coat, an annoying brother sister duo, a car chase scene involving the police, a dead dad, and elves that look like if rats developed into humans and not primates. It’s really a festive classic. (I know this sounds scathing but this was actually quite an enjoyable watch it was just a very weird plot,internally the brother and sisters dad is dead and that’s killed the brothers Christmas spirit and then the sister decides to video record Santa on VHS even though it’s set in 2017 and then they accidentally stow away in his sled and cause him to crash, jeopardising Christmas- that’s the exact plot). It was actually well done, the kid actors weren’t the best but again they’re child actors but overall the plot was interesting and it was well choreographed and shot, it’s a Christmas film it’s not a masterpiece but it was enjoyable!

-Disenchantment

A rewatch but still good, thought the 3D perspective in 2D animation does make me queasy soemtimes but we’ll ignore that. It’s very funny and quite tongue in cheek but what do you expect from the dude who made the Simpson’s and futurama, it’s quite a smart play on merging modern culture and references into a fantasy medieval setting though sometimes it does come across like they’re trying too hard, but don’t we all try too hard sometimes. It’s well made, not incredible but it’s well thought out, well written and well planned and it’s a real fun and easy watch and Im rewatching it so clearly it’s at least alright

-Hilda

Incredibly good!!! So so good!!! Like I literally can’t sing the praise of this show enough! I ya on Netflix it’s like a kids animated show it’s about a girl and her pet deer fox and they move to the city, and it’s like her with her friends going on little adventures and being a scout and whatever except it’s set in a world where like folklore and stuff is real- it’s more Scandinavian folklore so it’s like giants and vittra and trolls and druegens but it’s so cool!! The writings kind of simple because it’s aimed for kids but it’s still solid and the plots are crazy cool, the characters are very loveable and oddly well-rounded and they develop as the show goes on, the storylines are also super cool and interesting and they have really good continuity. And I really can’t tell you how cute the animation is, it’s really simple and Patel but it works so well for the theme of the show and the actual sequences are so fluid and dynamic it’s so cool! Cannot even describe how much I love this show and how happy I am season 2 just came out!

#101 #102 #104 #general

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rebeccacclarke-blog · 6 years ago

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Y1 / S1 / Week 3: Interview Practice

Interview Questions:

Have you been to many festival / events?

Please Tell me more about your least favourite experiences…? Or something you saw happening?

What were you thinking in those moments…?

How did that make you feel…?

What did you do about that…?

Have you ever had items stolen or damaged at an event?

How did this make you feel?

Did you make any changes or take action because of this?

Do you feel that people at events respect your belongs and self…?

Do you feel safe in mosh pits?

Have you had any bad experiences in mosh pits?

How often do you drink?

Do you feel pressured…?

How does this make you feel…?

Who pressures you usually…?

Do you ever have any regrets from drinking…?

Have these regrets made you change your behaviours…?

Has drinking impacted your everyday life, if so how?

Has drinking ever led you to a situation where you were not in control…?

Please explain, how did you feel?

How do you define sexual assaulted?

Have you ever been sexually assaulted?

How did this make you feel?

Did you do anything about it, if so what?

Have you ever felt vulnerable in a social situation?

Please explain…?

What do you think could make an event better…?

First interview:

Gender / age?

24, female

Have you been to many festival / events?

Only been to one last new years, I went to Northern Bass

We would like to hear about your experiences…?

Really good experience, one of my favourite new years, really good time

Please Tell me more about your least favourite experiences…? Or something you saw happening?

Security is daunting a little bit, it completely depends on what security guard you get, they either don’t care or they are a bit too intimidating, your not the police.

What were you thinking in those moments…?

Don't care or too intimidation, calm down bro, swat team

How did that make you feel…?

On edge

What did you do about that…?

Nothing

Have you ever had items stolen or damaged at an event?

Not me personally

Friends- goods stolen

How did this make you feel?

He was pissed off

Did you make any changes or take action because of this?

No actions

Do you feel that people at events respect your belongs and self…?

No- everyone is selfish and notice this at festivals, no one gives a shit while under influence, not very hard to break down this barrier, donate tentpegs, crowd is just ppl not real, but when you talk to them its more human

Do you feel safe in mosh pits?

Yes reasonably

Do you like being in mosh pits?

Yes

Have you had any bad experiences in mosh pits?

Not bad bad, its overwhelming cause im 5.3, claustrophobic

How often do you drink?

On average, 1 time a week

Do you feel pressured…?

Not pressured, its encouraged, works at bar

How does this make you feel…?

Most of time strong enough, but im susceptible with peer pressure

Who pressures you usually…?

Friends

Do you ever have any regrets from drinking…?

Yes. definitely, why did I post on snapchat

Have these regrets made you change your behaviours…?

Grown slowly as i've grown up, not a result of reflecting on regrets

Has drinking impacted your everyday life, if so how?

Yeah, but positively, makes things easier, making mates, social is a plus espech when anxious

Has drinking ever led you to a situation where you were not in control…? Please explain, how did you feel?

Definitely, stupid, take it too far

How do you define sexual assaulted?

Any sexual advance without consent

Have you ever been sexually assaulted?

yes

How did this make you feel?

Pissed and mad every time

Did you do anything about it, if so what?

No- hit people, not legally tho, yelled and reacted

Have you ever felt vulnerable in a social situation?

Yes

Please explain…?

In any situ where you don’t have anyone to rely on, who’s close, unfamiliar is most vulnerable

What do you think could make an event better…?

Drug testing- offering safe way to make sure drugs safe, but then it just promotes it, even preventing mad bad trips, correct dosage

Second Interview:

Gender / age?

Female, 20 years

Have you been to many festival/events?

Concert and events can’t even count, but festivals RnV twice, Bay Dreams once and Laneway.

We would like to hear about your experiences…?

Pretty good, the three day events it gets a but hectic at the end, even Bay Dreams which is a one day events, Hectic as in dirty and everyone is dead not literally but hungover and come downs and stuff.

Please Tell me more about your least favourite experiences…?

My personal experience of what I disliked the most was when you lose your friends or have to find your friends, it's such a struggle.

When I lose them I try text them and that usually doesn't send, and you and on other person just sit there, like I’m not usually by myself, just like me and my boyfriend and we are just chilling, never been alone usually always been with at least one person, but sometimes have gone to the toilet by myself or run off to meet up with someone else.

What were you thinking in those moments…?

In those moments when I was by yourself I was just thinking where are my friends, just trying to find someone because I hate being by myself.

How did that make you feel…?

I feel anxious when I am by myself.

What did you do about that…?

I found my friends.

Have you ever had items stolen or damaged at an event?

Not really, just damaged because I stood on it, so it was my own fault.

How did this make you feel?

...did not apply

Did you make any changes or take action because of this?

...did not apply

Do you feel that people at events respect your belongs and self…?

...did not apply

Do you feel safe in mosh pits?

Yes I do, but I know one of my friends, she hates them. With friends I feel safe and myself in mosh pits I would feel a bit eugh, but also if there is someone kinda grotty in the mosh pits I like like get out of her.

Why Do you like being in mosh pits?

Generally its a good vibe and everybody is there for the same reason, and everyone wants to have fun, so I like them and just having a dance.

Have you had any bad experiences in mosh pits?

I usually try stay out of it but there are people that are aggressive and will push and then kinda, if you say anything and if they get angry they will almost start a fight but I would never let it get that far, I’m not that type of person.

Have you ever seen anything bad things, like fights in mosh pits?

Yes, I’ve seen chicks fighting and pulling each others hair and it got quite intense.

How often do you drink?

Weekends only, but not every weekend, like when uni gets more intense lees socialising and less drinking every second or third weekend.

How much do you usually drink in one night?

I binge, I am a lightweight, to get drunk it would be like 5.

Do you feel pressured…?

No, I don’t think so, If I don’t really feel like it I won’t, or I will just have one or two and be like nah that's alright.

How does this make you feel…?

...did not apply

Who pressures you usually…?

...did not apply

Do you ever have any regrets from drinking…?

I honestly don’t, when your drunk your excuse is that your drunk, my regret would be when I am sober and I have done something stupid and it's like you can only blame your stupid self.

Have these regrets made you change your behaviours…?

...did not apply

Has drinking impacted your everyday life, if so how?

Yea, being hungover and if I have work the next day, gotta think about the consequences.

Has drinking ever led you to a situation where you were not in control…? Please explain, how did you feel?

I don’t think so, I haven’t really ever gotten blackout drunk, like I have never forgotten anything, never gotten that far, it would take alot and I just don't get like that, always felt in control even if technically I wasn’t I have always thought I was.

How do you define sexual assaulted?

Anything unwanted, any advance that there was no consent for.

Have you ever been sexually assaulted?

Yes

How did this make you feel?

Just scared, thought it was my fault, you think about what you have done to bring it on yourself/ cause it to happen?

Did you do anything about it, if so what?

Have you ever felt vulnerable in a social situation?

Yes

Please explain…?

Vulnerable in social situations is like everyday, coming into uni, walking into the classroom, coming in late.

What do you think could make any event better…?

They often have stuff already set up and I either don’t pay attention to it, can’t think of anything because I feel like they try do as much as they can generally and then its whether people want to use it or not, with helplines and things, Laneway had their own helpline number you could call if you needed.

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imagine-ikebukuro · 8 years ago

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tagged in a few things

more under the cut!

92 truths meme

Tagged by: @glitzcake thank u!

LAST…

[1] Drink: orange juice

[2] Phone call: a friend of mine, annika

[3]Text message: my brother

[4] Song you listened to: this remix, i’m obsessed with it lately!

[5] Time you cried: aw shit, a few days ago? last weekend? idk man

HAVE YOU EVER…

[6] Dated someone twice: no

[7] Been cheated on: nope

[8] Kissed someone and regretted it: yup

[9] Lost someone special: kind of? but… more in a sense of drifting apart rather than someone passing away

[10] Been depressed: not diagnosed, but i’m pretty sure my mental health is not at its best at all

[11] Gotten drunk and thrown up: lmao yes and not only once either

LIST THREE FAVOURITE COLORS…

[12] grey!

[13] turquoise!

[14] burgundy!

IN THE LAST YEAR…

[15] IN THE LAST YEAR…

[16] fallen out of love: nah

[17] laughed until you cried: pretty sure

[18] found out someone was talking about you: people be talking shit 24/7 and all i gotta say about it: I DON’T CARE AS LONG AS IT’S ABOUT ME

[19] met someone who changed you: mhhhh, no not really

[20] found out who your true friends are: definitely!

[21] kissed someone on your facebook list: yeeeaaah? could’ve been in 2015, my sense of time is terrible Dx

GENERAL…

[22] how many of your facebook friends do you know in real life: 90% of people, 5% others are friends i’ve known for several months or years over the internet and 5% are random people or some “celebrities” i found lmao

[23] do you have any pets: no, sadly not ;;

[24] do you want to change your name: i’m fine with my name, tbh!

[25] what did you do for your last birthday: i went to the museum and ate sushi with my family and a few weeks later had a party with my friends

[26] what time did you wake up: today? 8am

[27] what were you doing at midnight last night: watching youtube videos

[28] name something you cannot wait for: to finally be accepted to college and not being nervous about applying for university and everything, but have it all sorted out

[29] when was the last time you saw your mother: she’s sitting in the same room as me right now

[30] what is one thing you wish you could change about your life: if i could go back in time, i would do anything to have my father and i get along properly today

[31] what are you listening to right now: a zelda remix playlist

[32] have you ever talked to a person named tom: actually, yes, i had a huge crush on someone named tom, he was two classes above me during middle school

[33] something that is getting you nervous: the thought of me getting my wisdom teeth removed tomorrow, ugh. also, general organization and planning shit, like applying for college, moving out of my hometown, living on my own very soon, being forced to meet new people, all that jazz.

[34] most visited website: i guess tumblr? even though, lately, it’s probably youtube

[35] elementary: 2004 - 2008

[36] high school: graduated last year

[37] college: i can apply for my first semester next week. if i’m accepted, i’ll start going there in fall this year.

[38] hair color: i’m a ginger, so red-brown

[39] long or short hair: short! i cut it into an undercut like almost 2 years ago

[40] do you have a crush on someone: no, i avoid that shit

[41] what do you like about yourself: my eye color?

[42] piercings: i literally got zero piercings, not even on my ears, but i wish i had an industrial piercing and i used to really want flesh tunnels, maybe i’ll get there eventually

[43] blood type: i actually don’t know :^)

[44] nickname: some people call me lilly, some call me li. the villagers in my animal crossing town call me ukeprince, wot

[45] relationship status: married to the neighbour’s cat which i saw from my window and went out for just to pet it about 500 times by now

[46] zodiac sign: virgo!

[47] pronouns: they/them, she/her, he/him

[48] fav tv show: at the moment i’m watching PLL (but i don’t like it at all so rip) my favorite’s gotta be buffy the vampire slayer!

[49] tattoos: none yet

[50] right or left hand: right handed

FIRST…

[51] surgery: i had surgery in my mouth last year and like mentioned above, i’m getting my wisdom teeth removed tomorrow, if that counts

[52] piercing: none

[53] best friend: she’s not even active on tumblr anymore, rip, her name’s lydia though IF YOU READ THIS, THEN HELLO MY BRO

[54] sport: i’m planning to swim regularly again after recovering and healing up from surgery

[55] vacation: if it counts, my first ever “vacation” was the music festival Rock im Park 2013 with my father and a good friend of mine

[56] pair of trainers: no clue

RIGHT NOW…

[57] eating: nothing

[58] drinking: orange juice

[59] i’m about to: maybe get to playing some loz: botw

[60] listening to: still the loz remix playlist

[61] waiting for: anxious feelings to pass

[62] want: a huge cup of coffee

[63] get married: nopedy nope, i don’t fixate myself on wishing to get married. if it happens, it happens and i’ll be happy about it, but if not, then that’s cool on my terms, too!

[64] career: i’m working on becoming a teacher (i want to teach german, english and ethics in high schools)

WHICH IS BETTER…

[65] hugs or kisses: honestly, it depends, but generally, i’d say hugs

[66] lips or eyes: eyessss

[67] shorter or taller: i don’t care, both is nice

[68] older or younger: as long as it’s pretty close to my age, i don’t mind

[69] romantic or spontaneous: neither LMAO if i had to chose, romantic, bc i’m as spontaneous as a potato, i gotta plan ahead, bruh

[70] nice arms or nice stomach: stomach! and by that i mean any kind of stomach! ripped af or soft, i’m weak.

[71] sensitive or loud: sensitive

[72] hook up or relationship: relationship

[73] troublemaker or hesitant: a nice balance between the two would be cool. let’s be real though, troublemakers always catch my eye, even though i’m quickly annoyed by them just as well wtf is wrong with me

HAVE YOU EVER…

[74] kissed a stranger?: no

[75] drank hard liquor?: yes

[76] lost glasses/contact lenses?: no wtf i’d be walking around half blind

[77] turned someone down: yes

[78] sex on first date?: no

[79] broken someone’s heart?: apparently so

[80] had your own heart broken?: at the time i think i would’ve called it that, but honestly, it wasn’t that horrible, so nah?

[81] been arrested?: no

[82] cried when someone died?: yeah

[83] fallen for a friend?: do lowkey crushes count in which you gush over how amazing someone is? platonic crushes? it’s a thing.

DO YOU BELIEVE IN…

[84] yourself?: i used not to, but lately i’m more confident i think!

[85] miracles?: not really

[86] love at first sight?: no

[87] Santa Claus?: no

[88] kiss on the first date?: sure

[89] angels?: no

OTHER…

[90] current best friend’s name: Lydia

[91] eye color: greyish-green (if i cry or sometimes late at night they’re really GREEN!)

[92] favorite movie: nightmare before christmas!

10 questions ask game.

tagged by @peacefuldesires thx!

What things make you smile and all warm-fuzzy inside? CATS no seriously, i can have the worst day, but when i walk home and get to pet a cat on the way, i instantly better. i remember coming home after my last final exam all upset and a cat meowing at me and purring and wanting to cuddle with me and i couldn’t help but smile!

What things make you feel a bit sad (don’t push yourself to answer this one)? my current family situation, there’s a bit of drama and fights going on.

What things inspire you to grow? anything and everything, to be honest. there’s new things you experience and learn every single day. things you conquer and master just fine and mistakes you make and all of them shape you into knowing what to do next time a bit more.

The last song(s) that you couldn’t stop listening to? i can’t really think of anything right now, uhhhh, i’ve been listening to the trust me durarara!! ending lately again haha

5. Are you an introvert/extrovert/ambivert? What kind (are you a shy extrovert, super confident introvert, or perhaps a really confused ambivert :0)?: i’m an introvert through and through. i wouldn’t say i’m exceptionally shy nor super confident. i’m somewhere in between. it really depends, around my friends i’m outgoing and cheering and with certain strangers, especially if i know i have to talk with them for literally no longer than 3 minutes right now (i.e. a cashier or someone you walk past) then i’m polite and rather talkative. i just feel exhausted even after spending a lot of time with friends, though the time was enjoyable, but i need my alone time for sure.

What calms you down? the triangle breath! it’s my favorite method to use whenever i feel anxious, upset, angry, or just need to stop and pause for a few minutes. you picture a triangle in your mind (you can even trace it with your finger, or if you can draw it on a piece of paper). you take a breath in through your nose, tracing one side of the triangle. then you breathe out through your mouth, tracing the second and third side of it. other than that, listening to music, taking a nap, petting a cat, watching videos of cats or other cute stuff, sometimes playing a video game.

A character that you really relate to (perhaps you have similar personalities, or maybe you came from similar backgrounds)?: this is gonna sound trashy, but saeyoung choi from mystic messenger and there’s a story behind it too. my friends were playing it way before me and told me “there’s this character that looks just like you, you know nerd glasses, messy red hair, always wearing a baggy black hoodie. he even acts like you, making puns and using memes ALL THE TIME!” and it’s true lmao. also, kaneki ken to some extent? like i really resonate with his personality, the choices he makes, his thoughts speak to me, he’s pretty harsh on himself and goes through ways that are self destructive if he can help others with it.

One thing you love learning? language, it’s just fascinating to me.

Angst or fluff? ANGST, I AM THE ANGST QUEEN, COME ON

If you punch yourself, does that mean you’re strong or does that mean you’re weak? neither and a little bit of both at the same time. let’s go deep in on this one and take the “punch” as emotional self loathing. bashing yourself down definitely doesn’t mean you’re strong, it doesn’t make you tough at all, it only means you’re harsh on yourself. it doesn’t make you weak either. you’re making yourself believe you are weak, but the fact that you endure that and still have the power to do so, means you’re tougher than you’re think.

MY QUESTIONS:

Now that spring’s here, what’s your favorite thing about this season and what do you not like about it?

What’s your spirit animal? Literally. Which animal do you think resembles your inner self and why? (maybe your Patronus, if you know it?

What’s your go-to order at a café?

Do you consider yourself to be creative?

If you could go back in time and change something, would you? If so, what? If not, why?

Where do you see yourself in 20 years from now?

Home sweet home, what makes you feel comfortable in your own home? What’s the overall aesthetic of your room, any colors, textures, an atmosphere, do you maybe keep many stuffed animals or posters or plants?

What do you think is most important when it comes to friendship?

What’s something you improved in since last year?

Werewolves or Vampires, which are cooler?

I tag: @imagine-your-party-hosts || @obsessivefujoshi || @dotaccino || @mollyxmousey || anyone who wants to do this

#i was tagged #shut up liane #long post for ts #not drrr

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twistednuns · 6 years ago

Text

June 2018

Travelling makes me happy. Makes me feel like a more interesting person, makes my life feel much richer. I'm thankful for every opportunity I get to see the world. My time in Bali was fantastic. I carried around four books all the time and yet I only managed to read about 100 pages. There was just so much to do and see.

The word Geräuschkulisse

Roasting peaches on top of halloumi slices with a dash of honey and apple cider vinegar. Mmmh.

"Whether it’s meditation, reading, or trekking through Timbuktu, you must find something that gives you a happiness that is not contingent on others." One or two people about the importance of being alone.

Shopping at the market early on Saturday morning. The charming dude who sold me strawberries, mangoes and an avocado. Empty aisles at the drugstore. Carrying everything home in my huge trekking backpack, almost losing balance on the bike.

The rust-coloured &otherstories dress with tortoise shell buttons. Such a dream, alas, too small. Had to send it back. Sigh.

Going to Im Grünen Festival near the Austrian border with Markus. Stopping at Chiemsee for a swim. The band Leoniden covering the old Sugababes song Overload (got stuck in my head immediately). Realising that it keeps getting harder for me to be in bad company. The more I like myself the less I like others.

Veganz Choc Bar Coconut. Even more addictive than the dm bio coconut bars and the Rapunzel ones. Delicious.

Spending an evening with Franzi at the new rooftop beergarden. It's on top of a parking garage near Stachus!

Alessandro's HAND!SPA hand cream which comes in a little yellow macaron box and smells like lemon buttermilk.

I finally caved in and bought a SodaStream Crystal. Bye bye, bottled water and plastic waste! EDIT: I also got a high speed blender. Hello, nicecream!

Getting to know my new neighbour Silvie.

Making pink and yellow slime with the sixth-graders.

Learning about how brazil nuts grow. They're huddled against each other in a big shell! Weird. I never knew.

Reading Linnéas Jahrbuch, an old Swedish children's book favourite of mine. I love Lena Anderson's illustrations.

Thoughts about the monstera hype.

A small girl said goodbye to her friend one morning on the subway: "Dann noch ein schönes Leben!"

Such a busy Saturday. Getting all my affairs in order in the morning, writing long to-do-lists. Going grocery shopping, buying plants at Ries. Visiting Sabine, working on our song for the choir. Getting a message from Manu: his parents have a sales booth at the Africa festival in Munich and he doesn't wanna go alone. Going home, baking a cake, hurrying to the subway, meeting up with him and his mum. She got us in for free and I had such a nice evening there. Eating, drinking, walking around, talking to the parents, some friends, buying a ring, chili oil and lemon/orange pepper. Discussing art with his dad. Joking around with his mum. I felt very comfortable in that warm and familial atmosphere. Also, everyone kept thinking we were a couple. Mh.

Hanging out at Maria Einsiedel on a Sunday afternoon. Reading. Only jumping into the Eiskanal once. Very refreshing. I like that feeling as if thounsands of tiny needles were pricking your skin, just a little bit.

Climbing. Up the monkey bars, the wall in the boulder room, over the fence. It's nice to feel strong and capable, earn that sense of accomplishment, to feel your muscles working.

Solving two anagrams after staring at those words for almost two hours.

Feeling like wonderwoman. I don't know what happened but since the beginning of 2018 I've been feeling like a completely different person. I'm much happier, I have more energy. I enjoy getting things done and going the extra mile - often quite literally when I simply walk to the next bus stop instead of waiting, or when I start cleaning or doing things that are not absolutely necessary. I'm starting to feel like myself. To come closer to my true sense of being. It took me ten years longer than I thought it would but I guess I needed to take the long route.

I made sweet potato toast for the first time. A great savoury breakfast option!

Murakami's Wind-Up Bird Chronicle. The book is almost 800 pages long and I'm not quite finished but I have to say that so far I like it even more than Kafka on the Shore. All those visionary women, the shadow world - and the stories about the Soviet–Japanese border conflicts during the Second World War (submarines, sitting in wells, shooting zoo animals, being skinned alive) creep the shit out of me. I also love the focus on neat clothing in that book.

Safiya Nygaard is a good/weird person. Seriously. All those pop-culture references. Thank you, sister.

Playing around with the Bitmoji app (and the fact that mine looks a bit like Rachel Weisz).

Terrazzo tiles.

Booking my flights to Australia and Indonesia! I'm so excited. I've never travelled alone for more than a few days and now I'm going to be away for almost a month. I'm gonna spend almost 27 hours on planes on my way to Brisbane. What an adventure.

Ulli Lust's graphic novels.

My new yoga class. I'm going to be there every Wednesday, cursing myself and my decision to commit to this. It's exhausting and weird but so good for me. But I've already found out that I'm able to put my feet behind my head in a backwards bend. Way to go.

Learning how to use a potter's wheel. I didn't do too well because you need to stick to rules (something I'm bad at - at least when it comes to art) but turning and shaping the semi-hard pots afterwards is so much fun; exactly my thing. I need to practise, it's awesome to see a vase growing between your hands.

Miranda July's The First Bad Man at Kammerspiele Munich. This is the most hilarious and entertaining production I've ever seen in a theatre, I suppose. Anna Drexler reminds me of Birgit Minichmayr and has a lot of comedic talent. And Brandy Butler, geez, that voice. You could see quite clearly that someone had a lot of fun putting this play together.

Love in Translation

"If I'm not the love of your life I'll be the greatest loss instead." - Rupi Kaur (and the first part of her poetry collection The Sun and Her Flowers - I thought her poems about losing love were very relatable)

Meeting the bees! I designed honey jar labels last year and now I got to know the industrious little workers behind our product. We harvested and pressed the honey - I even petted the bees, they are so soft. I had a pretty nice day. And I love crushing honeycombs with my bare hands. Good texture and a very satisfying feeling.

Going dancing for the first time in... a very long time. I met up with Frank and Claudia at Import Export, took a picture of the fake Pommesbude and had actually quite a lot of fun doing silly moves, talking to Frank. It was weird because we kept saying the same thing at pretty much the same time. So that means we're still the same kind of lame/awesome?

#personal #present perfect #things i love #june #2018 #june 2018

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