#It’s because uuuh I do that. And it’s ANNOYING!!!

[heuffopla]

Quick comic about this headcanon I have that Pim can’t get REALLY angry without crying and it’s really frustrating for him oops

[sittinginthewoodsrn]

i cant dirty talk actually.

im australian it will NOT be sexy i promise

i dont wanna be bred, i wanna mate

like?????

[shegetsburned]

𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐢 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐤 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐣𝐣𝐤 𝐦𝐞𝐧 𝐰𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐨𝐤 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐲𝐨𝐮 | part i ‧₊˚ 𓐐

— ft. satoru gojo. suguru geto. kento nanami. toji fushiguro. ryomen sukuna.

𝐬𝐚𝐭𝐨𝐫𝐮 𝐠𝐨𝐣𝐨

normally he prefers to just eat what other people prepare for him, tasting his friends and students’ meals, most of the time.

but when he cooks, gojo doesn’t have time for shit, so I’m thinking of something simple but good. he likes to eat, especially sweet stuff. something sweet and salty, maybe?

he can do anything he sets his mind to, but is probably too lazy to cook most of the time, so he’ll just do the same two or three meals.

main dish; i’m thinking of teriyaki sauce chicken with some rice. it’s simple and soooo good. you can also feel the sweet taste of the sauce on the meat and it’s absolutely delicious.

you’ll have to close your eyes before satoru feeds you the first bite as he waits for your reaction.

i’m sure it’s sublime and it annoys you that he can always do everything just right. I mean, after cooking the same thing over and over again, everyone would excel, but this man has done it perfectly since the first time.

𝐬𝐮𝐠𝐮𝐫𝐮 𝐠𝐞𝐭𝐨

man looooooves to cook for you. you’re barely doing the cooking when he’s at home and it’s delicious every time.

he’ll learn new dishes just for you and ask what you prefer. he doesn’t cook for him, he does it for you, to see your smile when you swallow one of your favourite dishes.

it’s not extra elaborate dishes, but it’s cooked with so much love. the presentation is insane and it’s always exquisite.

suguru will find a way to make an amazing meal with the few ingredients you guys have in the fridge.

he’s definitely the type to add his own touch to every meal so that it tastes absolutely divine.

main dish; maybe a spicy ahi poke which is a spicy tuna bowl made with fresh chunks of fresh sashimi and a spicy mayo sauce. despite looking like an ordinary meal, its lightness and flavour makes me think suguru would be the type to cook this for you.

𝐤𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐨 𝐧𝐚𝐧𝐚𝐦𝐢

i have mixed feelings about this man because he used to buy the same sandwich from the same bakery for years. so i have a feeling he barely used to eat, especially being so occupied with work and doing overnights; less experience in the kitchen?

but for you, he has a soft spot and wants to do the best in everything that concerns you, including cooking. so he’ll learn his ass off in secret and surprise you with amazing meals.

he often prepares multiple dishes for one dinner so you can taste as much as possible. this man is hardworking.

main dishes; seafood salad + vegetable stew + temari sushi (their presentation is adorable, you’d love them) + a bunch of meat and seafood.

kento prepares everything before you come home, living for the sparkles in your eyes when you see the delicious-looking plates on the table.

𝐭𝐨𝐣𝐢 𝐟𝐮𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐠𝐮𝐫𝐨

honestly, he barely cooks for you. he usually just orders take-outs, and makes you pay.

I just know he likes spicy stuff. it’s always fuming hot when it goes into your mouth.

i’m sorry but this man doesn’t know how to cook. he just endures food or goes out to eat. i swear he doesn’t give a fuck about what he eats, as long as he thinks it’s good and enough for his belly to be filled, he’ll eat it.

main dish; instant noodles at best. adding canned meat and sriracha sauce into the mix. he’s lazy, okay? but who doesn’t enjoy a good old cup of instant noodles?

also, toji’s the type to shove the food into your mouth to make you stfu thinking you’re annoying because you’re hungry.

𝐫𝐲𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐧 𝐬𝐮𝐤𝐮𝐧𝐚

uuuh, is he even cooking for you, or are you the one doing everything?

i have a feeling he’s crazy about meat. he needs some in his meals at all times otherwise it’s uninteresting.

so if he ever cooks for you, don’t be surprised to see different kinds of meat, and it is spicy asf too.

he takes pleasure in killing the meat himself, loving the thrill of chasing and devouring his prey.

main dish; roasted lamb shoulder with garlic. a whole ass piece of meat for the king of curses and you. he’ll probably eat many shoulders to satisfy his hunger and watch you take your time with the giant meal he prepared while salivating.

he’ll eat you after.

© shegetsburned 2023. Please do not repost/edit/or claim my writing as your own.

[masked-watcher]

Ghost: You are one annoying bastard, you know that, right?

Soap: And still you put up with me mhm?

Ghost: Someone's got to babysit you.

Soap: And you're volunteering?

Ghost: Not like I have a choice.

Soap: You do. You're surely able to request another partner at any time and given your reputation, and uuuh probably mine, Price or Laswell would happily oblige.

Ghost: I don't want another partner.

Soap: Even tho I am annoying the shit outta you?

Ghost: Especially because you're annoying the hell out of me.

[eliza-the-hunted]

Thoughts b4 bed, this...got ridiculously long..SKIP TOWARDS THE END for my Peri and Dev idea I'd like to personally see if you don't care about my godparenting ramble. 💖 (I marked it with a star for easy spotting.)

Godparenting is self harm (in certain situations). You CANNOT pair a fairy, who has basic empathy, with a child who is being neglected and/or abused, and expect them to NOT get attached or to love them.

Cosmo and Wanda loved Timmy. They were his parents!!

Juandissimo loved Remy. He couldn't move on from him.

It's also horrible for the kids when they get a fairy who doesn't develop that parental/guardian relationship.

Peri failed Dev because he remained distant and overly professional. (I'm not saying he didn't care, that's a whole other debate. I'm just saying he was not what Dev needed. Dev needed a Cosmo, Wanda, or Juandissimo.)

I'm sure other fairies failed kids in similar situations, maybe even worse, because they didn't want to fall into that emotional trap. It's BEYOND hard not to. You would have to be extremely hardened, dissociated, or heartless in order to do that.

At least the kids get to forget their failed experience.

Fairies have to remember. They have to remember for the rest of their lives that they either:

A) Got bonded with a kid and had to say goodbye, a type of goodbye that's honestly like a funeral. You will never see each other again (except in passing. But you can't contact them.) The loss and yearning would be too much for anyone.

B) Have to remember that they couldn't bond with the kid and thus failed them. They failed that neglected/abused child. That child had to grow up with their abuse without any escapism because you had to remain professional and throw away your whimsy. I'm CONVINCED Peri is NOT the only fairy to be annoying about "da rules". I'm actually pretty sure that's the NORM because of how all the fairies reacted to Cosmo and Wanda with Timmy.

Going into fairy godparenting, knowing that you could come out with either outcome, is self harm to me, (SH is doing anything that you KNOW will hurt you physically or emotionally, it can be any number of things! JS this here because people have a VERY narrow view about what counts as SH!) and really makes me overthink about like...

Fairy mental health? How does fairy therapy look like for these situations? I kind of envision it similar to ppl IRL who work with abused kids need therapy, yet they keep going. They keep moving on and helping kids (or doing their best to).

⭐️All this to say my idea for Peri and Dev:

I would love for Peri to learn from his situation with Dev and why it didn't work. I know ppl want them to get back together asap, but tbh I think a slow burn would work best, for Peri's mental health. I think Peri should shadow his parents and Hazel for a bit, and learn/see how they do things, including how they interact with kids. I think Peri needs some self reflection first.

My idea is this:

Peri shadows his parents for awhile and does some self reflection. While he shadows his parents, he watches Dev from afar. Not like, intently like some ppl HC, just in passing. Like Dev will interact with Hazel and Peri will make passing remarks like "he's a good kid", (if him and Hazel are getting along) or "oh, Dev.." (if he does smth rude to Hazel)

Eventually, smth happens to Dev that finally seals it for Peri, he has already been meditating on everything for awhile, but whatever happens to Dev is the final straw. (I wonder what happens??) And he gets permission to be Devs godparent again and then bursts in to save Dev!

(this would all happen maybe thruout the whole season, and this event would happen at the ending of S2? Ik ppl would be impatient for that, but!! I think it would work best AND be a rlly satisfying season conclusion!!) and a rlly good start for S3 (iiiif we got all that lmao, I'm being VERY hopeful that we get at least 3-4 seasons! which I shouldn't when S2 is still up in the air lol. oh well. I can dream.)

Uuuh. Yeah. IDk just some thoughts I've had. Sorry this was so long. If you read it then wow! I'm shocked haha. 💖 (bonus points if u read the tags hahaha)

goodnight. 💖💖

[murainhell]

Apology Tour Spoilers!

Guys… I'm going to start by saying that I really like the episode. The songs, the return of Verosika, the way we have several conversations between the two of them even though they get nowhere because they keep not listening to the other!!! The drama. Yes, give me more. I didn't expect them to fix it quickly, so this has been what I was hoping for and more.

But I'm so annoyed by all the hate I'm seeing on twitter. I mean, one of my friends doesn't like it and we've been able to have a civil conversation about our opinions, but that website… Oh, goodness.

First of all, why are so many people hating on the poor incubus guy? What is his crime? He notices a super cute owl demon at a party, technically single since he's Blitz's new ex, and asks him to dance. Makes Stolas laugh. He steals a kiss but Stolas reacts well. I'll be honest: I would kiss Stolas too in that situation lol

I mean, yeah, I would understand if people were saying that Stolas is drunk and what about consent and such, but…. Who hasn't been out at a party and made out with someone? And they're bloody demons? I mean. Seriously, the strong reaction of hatred towards him is just because he gets in the way of Stolitz? Let's be honest, did anyone really expect them to sort it out already? This communication problem between them is going to go on for a long time. They have a lot of things to heal, themselves first, and then with each other.

Martha and Mayberry being together is also a problem for some people? We're in hell, I hope they have a good time!

"What happened to the husband? Isn't he in hell?" Honey, just because he's not in the frame doesn't mean he's not, we just don't care about him lol

"This is so toxic, they're both in hell because of each other" yes, and? Dear, Martha was a murderer and ate people, she was going to end up here anyway. Possibly the other sending hitmen after her was super hot in her book, who knows! (And personally happy to have crumbs about a cannibal, as it makes me think about Rosie and her town then, it's not such a universal thing, neither how they look or living under her protection).

Verosika, beautiful, gorgeous, I am delighted to have more information about her and the reason for her anger towards Blitz. I hope this makes people hate her a little less, jeez. Blitz needed someone to speak to him straight and it is obvious that it is after their conversation that it all sinks in.

And now about our beloved stars. Again, who expected them to solve it already? It's the next day, for God's sake! And I think exactly the same as I already said, this is not a team Stolas vs. team Blitz thing, they are both right and wrong at the same time! They have not had time to reflect and think!

I've seen many opinions from people saying they now support Stolas even more and others saying that the series now hates Blitz and the narrative is against him, giving the victory to Stolas. But, uuuh, no? I mean, it's just an episode specifically about Blitz being shitty to other people, it's something we know and it's necessary for him to see his effect on others. That doesn't mean they're proving Stolas right, we'll have more episodes to explore the whole conflict.

Stolas has his moment to talk and talk about what he wants, but he still hasn't heard what Blitz wants. He clearly doesn't know either. We'll have time for that later.

But it is so sad… Blitz doesn't know what to do, but Stolas is also looking for a relationship without knowing anything about them, he has them idealized.

And sometimes I can't help but think…. Does he really love Blitz or does he just think that because he was the first being to make him feel good? Bird boy, you urgently need to have other people in your life to know if it's Blitz that important or you've just idealized him.

"I don't even know why you would want to be with me." "I want to be someone's someone. I want to feel wanted."

That's not a conversation. No one is responding to the other (but Blitz is listening. This is the second time Stolas is not actively listening to him).

"Stolas shouldn't be kissing others if he claims to love Blitz so much" oh, right, being sad and looking for what he wants so much in others after being heartbroken (or so he thinks) invalidates the other. Fuck, too bad I can't use an expression in my native language, but I guess this is the equivalent? The quickest way to get over one man is to get under another one.

I know it's frustrating when your ship doesn't sail, but isn't it exactly these moments that make being together more rewarding later on? It's not the end of the series. It's going to be four seasons as Brandom said.

I feel like we have a series with complex characters who screw up and react quite realistically and people don't know how to digest it. Over the last years the confrontations are seen as black and white, there is always someone who is right and the other is wrong… Guys, it doesn't work like that.

My theory for now is that they won't be talking to each other for the remaining of the season. The scene of Blitz protecting Stolas? The season finale, and it's going to mark the beginning of the "you do care" but without them being together yet. The beginning of what could be a friendship, you know, the foundation of a relationship. And then, hopefully, next season or the last one will bring us the resolution.

[unyandere]

Yandere bully x reader who uses Socratic irony

Tw: use of Socratic Irony, gaslighting (?), bulling (attempts), Yanderish tendencies (but like not soo strong), bad English

I don’t wanna explain briefly Socratic Irony, so, if you want to understand what it is, who used it (spoiler: Socrates), how it works and how it was applied,… I’ll leave it to you to discover.

And for more unyandered Yanderes look at the MASTERPOST

He awaited for you at the entrance of the school, trying to think of a new insult.

He already picked on you for being a loner, a nerd, a creepy library person who always read stupid ancient books or something like that,… He didn’t have any more adjectives or ways of describing your “bad” traits.

Maybe he should have gotten more physical and more prone to “use” you for his needs… He shook his head, it was too soon. For now he’d have fun teasing you until you finally lost your temper giving him a reason to put you against a locker, make you feel his breath on your throat and hit you until you were a crying mess just because of him and him alone, maybe after that you would do everything he says, you would become his daring partner, would stay at home and do everything for him and never see anyone else,… Not like you had any friend with which you could cheat on him.

He saw you approaching the school with your bag and books, you had… what was that book? The bully tried to see the title from afar but he couldn’t make out the words, he only saw the author. Plato.

“Hey, what’cha got there idiot?” He said, approaching you and taking the book from your hands.

“Now now, while I am definitely not an expert in Idiotology , while you might be, I am not convinced by your theory” you answered.

“My… theory?” He repeated, confused.

“That I am an idiot. I don’t believe I fit into the characteristics needed in a person to be an idiot” you explain.

“Why?” He asks.

“Would you describe what an idiot is to me?” You demand.

“You are an idiot, the other students are idiots, most teachers in this school are idiots,… is that enough?” He answers, a bit annoyed.

“I’m sorry I didn’t make a precise question, I mean, what are the characteristics needed in a idiot” you explain.

“Uuuuh… Being stupid-“ he starts saying

“But what does being stupid mean? Is knowing things what makes people not stupid or is being wise what differentiates a stupid from a normal person? Would you say I’m stupid? We should know more or less the same amount of things since we go to the same school and we are in the same year” you say interrupting him

“I… Uuuh… W-whatever nerd” he mumbles perplexed

“What’s a nerd in your opinion?” You ask

“I… A nerd is a loser” he answers trying to make you shut up

“What does being a loser mean? Is staying alone a loser thing?” You continue to question, making him pretty much desperate.

“Uuuh… yeah, being a loner is a total nerd thing” he answers.

“But being able to stand a life of loneliness isn’t a brave choice? After all ermits get praised for living alone… Being able to stay alone means that someone is enough for themselves, which means they love themselves and loving ourselves isn’t the first step into loving others?” You continue to ask

“…I mean, kinda?” He answers unconvincingly.

“So doesn’t it mean that nerd are the ones who love the most?” You continue to ask.

“I… I guess” he answers.

“But aren’t lovers the happiest people on earth?” You ask.

He thinks at himself in love with you.

“I suppose” he answers.

“And aren’t happy people winning in their life?” You ask.

“Yeah, duh” he answers.

“So… couldn’t we say that nerds are winners and we should all aspire to become nerds since nerds reach happiness?” You ask.

He nods convinced.

Then he stops, realising in what he agreed.

“Wait… what?”

[vypridae]

You seem to be the only one making brokerdoll (thanks for the ship name btw) content, and I wanted to know if you have any more headcannon s, or just general thoughts on the ship. I'm starved for content

okay a. you are so welcome for the ship name i shit you not i spent like ten minutes just being like WHAT DO I CALL THEM because i couldn't figure out a word that would go well with "doll" (as velvette's ship names tend to have in them)

ANYWAY!! HEADCANONS !! i had a post uuuh here (that took me so much longer to find than it should have) of some hcs but here are some more!! (if this took forever to get out i apologize my brain is working at 2 wpm rn and sometimes thinking of hcs is hard)

after they started dating, carmilla starts buying velvette clothes she sees that she thinks velvette will love

spoiler alert: every single piece she buys for vel is exactly her style

i like to imagine carmilla is pleasantly rich, even in comparison to the other overlords, because her weapons and parts and whatnot just sell super well

so she gets so much money to spoil velvette with and she UTILIZES it

velvette's love language i imagine is acts of service or getting gifts (she knows they love her when they get her stuff) and carmilla's is gift giving, which neither of them seemed to realize until velvette literally squealed in joy when carmilla bought her a jewellery set she'd been wanting for FOREVER

also since singing is apparently just a canon thing in the hazbin universe, i cannot for the life of me stop imagining pre-relationship velvette sneaking vox's camera footage from inside carmilla's bunker(?) (of which he got velvette, conveniently, to put there after the overlord meeting) onto her phone just to listen to carmilla sing over and over and over again.

vox and val HAVE walked into her room to see her with her phone sitting on her dresser, watching the same footage of carmilla singing out for love for the 138147985th time

(they don't question it because lets be real they have their obsessions too)

post-relationship, velvette probably posts a bunch of fake online drama about her and carmilla because she thinks its funny to see people being like OMG??? WHAT NO WAY

carmilla is like "cariño why are you posting that we broke up. again." and velvette is like "just for funsies, babe <3"

velvette probably ends up showing carmilla how to use social media because let's be so fr she probably has no clue

velvette loves running her fingers through carmilla's hair and probably has just as much fun actually doing it up as carmilla has with velvette's

painting nails ?? carmilla paints velvette's and paints little white swirl designs over the black polish and velvette draws cute little pink hearts on carmilla's

(yes, they do both get questioned about it)

velvette probably wanted to start a friends w/ benefits (or enemies with benefits) relationship with carmilla but she knew for a fact carmilla would deny INSTANTLY

ok look they aren't married but matching rings ... carmilla wears hers as a necklace and velvette shows off her ring (that she keeps saying is "marriage proposal material" when its not) to literally everyone forever

possessive carmilla? only slightly. she glares daggers and probably throws said daggers at anyone who tries anything to velvette

pre-relationship velvette pining she progressively started sitting closer and closer to carmilla during meetings until she was in the chair next to her like zestial is during ep 3

(she lies out her ass and says it's "so i can annoy her easier, obviously" but she's just gay)

(carmilla starts noticing when velvette starts arriving to meetings earlier rather than later so she can get the seat she wants)

also velvette probably ended up convincing staticmoth to stay away from overlord meetings specifically so they can't tease her for being head over heels in hate-love with carmilla when she's in the same vicinity as her (of which they agree with because its more time for them to do What Ever The Fuck Their Gay Asses Do)

(also vox has cameras set up at the meeting room)

(guess who gets teased to heaven and back by two (2) overlords when she gets home)

(they both know the struggles of a weird obsession with another demon, they know how to poke and prod at velvette until she admits her gayness to them)

they probably ended up convincing her to confess tbh

(which doesnt happen for Several Years, probably)

either that, or carmilla finds a letter on her chair in the meeting room signed "~V" and opens it and it just says "we should be homos" or something stupid like that AJHAKASHJ

firm hc that velvette cannot confess for her fucking life . she doesnt like being vulnerable

lucky for her, carmilla 100% sends back a letter thats signed with "C. Carmine" and says "We can date, if that's what you mean by "being homos"" or something HAHAHASGFJ

[fatherentropy]

My grandma came to the states with her new American husband saying that her kids would be American and promptly didn't teach them shit about the Philippines. Unfortunately if you're biracial and look it you know uuuh that is not a thing other (white) people will ever let you do

I know tES got that whole thing where the kid will always take after the mom but there's always outliers and at least one case I saw where a later generation showed traits of older generations and that's just how genetics work anyway. SO Yorick's mom passes for a Nord, Yorick's dad passes for Breton, Yorick probably takes after his paternal grandmother and is only 25% Sea Elf but just a smattering of almost every kind of Human on Tamriel and he will default to literally anything but Maormer. Not because he's ashamed about it but because people are super annoying with that shit and it's funnier to make them angry than explain.

Also everyone not familiar with Maormer mistaking him for something that isn't Maormer except for Altmer who can clock him from five miles away amuses me.

[bfiaflbox]

You're my person

Pairing: Matty x Reader Warnings: Mentions and description of panic attacks, apart from that it's just fluff Disclaimer: I know that panic attacks feel different for every person so this is heavily influenced by my own experience.

I'm a supportive girlfriend, I'm a supportive girlfriend is your mantra for this evening. You don't particularly like these "industry events" as Matty calls them but he said he'd like you to be there so you were being a supportive girlfriend. You were hoping for an open bar and a nice outfit to get you through the evening.

You're at Matty's side in a crowded room full of dressed up and important looking people while Matty is having yet another conversation that you can't contribute to, with a person you don't know. It is then that the pit in your stomach opens and you start to feel uneasy. It's the feeling of self-doubt and rage you know very well. You observe the feeling, try to figure out where it's coming from and you realize it's because right now you are nobody. Or rather just a body. You're arm candy and you know the people here see you like that.

Nobody here cares about you, of that you are sure. Suddenly you don't want to be here anymore. Your dress is too itchy, the room is too small, everything's too loud and your shoes feel weird on your feet. You try to take a deep breath to shake off the feeling of impending doom but it doesn't help. The pit in your stomach grows. You're frantically trying to think of an excuse to leave the room, leave the venue, run to the forest and die in a hole. Another deep breath doesn't help either.

Matty next to you is oblivious to the black hole in your stomach that threatens to eat you alive and is making easy conversation with an older man who definitely likes to hear himself talk. You can't take it anymore, you put your hand on Matty's shoulder and quickly say "Excuse me, I'll be back in a minute" and almost run for the exit to the restrooms.

You lock yourself in a stall and hold your stomach. You're fine, you're fine. You're safe, nothing's going to harm you. You keep repeating these words in your head but they don't seem to work. Too late you notice that locking yourself in a tiny room maybe wasn't the cleverest idea when faced with a panic attack but at least you're alone. Tears threaten to well in your eyes. Great, crying will help for sure. You put the lid of the toilet down and sit on it, burying your head in your hands. You try to focus on what you can physically feel instead of your emotions. Fuck, have I been in here too long? Who cares, back to feeling your toes. They feel trapped in your high heels. I feel trapped. No, back to physical sensations. I can feel my elbows pressing into my thighs and leaving red marks. I can feel my hands getting colder and colder. That doesn't feel good. A few deep breaths will help. You breathe in through your nose and out through your mouth. Breathing out feels good but as soon as you're done, the dread is back. So you do it again. And again. And again. "Darling, are you in here?" it's Matty. Fuck. You debate if there's a way to deny it but come to the conclusion there really isn't. "Uhm hmm" you choke out affirmative. "Are you alright? You've been gone for an awful long time" You can't tell him, it's going to ruin his night. "Uuuh. Yeah" good job, that didn't sound convincing at all. "Honey, I'm worried" and he sounds like it. Just as you're about to open the door to the stall you're hiding in, a woman walks in and starts to berate Matty about being in the women's restroom. "Honestly, I don't give a fuck, my girl's not well. Mind your business" You open the door and are faced with a Matty that's a mix of worried and annoyed. You take another deep breath. "Let's get some air, please?" you ask him and he just nods and mumbles a soft "Sure, baby" and leads the way out of the building.

Once you stand in front of the house he turns to you and bluntly asks "Panic Attack?" You just nod. "Do you want a hug or your space?" your heart melts at this. He's not judging or belittling you, he's taking you seriously. "Space, please" "Alright, hot or cold?" You look at him questioningly. "I know, sounds silly, but what would help right now? Hot or cold?" "Cold" "You've got it. Wait here a sec, ok?" He waits for you to look him in the eyes and nod, before he goes inside again, leaving you there. It's a bit chilly but you welcome the lower temperature right now. You still feel the pit in your stomach but it seems a tiny bit less threatening now that Matty's on your side. A few minutes later he reappears with both your jackets and a glass filled with ice cubes. "You got our jackets?" "Don't worry 'bout that, here." He hands you the glass filled with ice cubes. You take it but don't quite know what to do with it. When he notices that he motions to his sternum and says "put it on your chest". You don't know what that's supposed to do but you trust Matty. When you can feel the cold glass on your chest, you get it. For some reason it's very relaxing. After a little while, breathing feels like breathing again and less like fighting for your life. "You feel a little bit better?" You nod again. "Good, let's get you home" You open your mouth to protest but Matty just drily interjects "Don't even try. I know how bad panic attacks feel, I'm not going to make you go back in there." you just smile weakly and nod again. He takes your jacket and puts it over your shoulders, careful not to make you feel like he's invading your space. It's not entirely necessary because you've calmed down a great bit by now but the respect and the care warm your heart. "I ordered an Uber earlier, it should be here any minute. You ok with my place?" "Yes, thanks"

The car arrives and you get in the back after putting the glass down on the curb . Once the driver starts, you look at Matty with adoration. He's so lovely to you which you enjoy but somehow don't think you deserve. You ruined his evening after all. "'m sorry" you tell him. Suddenly you feel very shy. He just takes your hand and asks "Do you want me to talk?" "What do you mean?" "It can be soothing to hear someone's voice but it can also be too much when you're in a state of sensory overload" he explains. "Please talk, I like it", you smile.

"You're doing amazing by the way. I had my fair share of panic attacks in the past and the thing with the questions is sort of what I told the guys to do whenever I get panicky because the nature of the attack can vary and you might need different things. Like with the question 'hug or space", I found both can be very helpful but the wrong thing can make it worse..." he continues to talk but you kind of don't take in the information. You just enjoy the sound of his voice. You feel yourself coming down from the attack.

When you enter Matty's house, he takes your jacket and you proceed to sit down on the sofa. He brings you a glass of water and sits down with you. "You alright?" he asks timidly "Yeah, yeah, I feel much better. Sorry for ruining your night, though" "Don't even think about it, it's no big deal. But do you know what brought on the panic attack?" You think about not telling him for a second, not ruining the picture of the supportive girlfriend you had painted in your head. But you decide to let him in further. "For some reason I suddenly felt so useless and out of place. Like I was just a body with the sole purpose of looking a certain way, not a person. It triggered something deep down and I panicked" "I'm sorry" he looks genuinely sad. "Don't blame yourself, I know I still have a lot of work to do regarding my..." you point to your head with a rotating index finger. "No, it's true that I didn't make you feel included tonight. It's just... I don't know these industry events are kind of hard for me as well. I was just so glad you were there with me. You know, a room full of strangers is terrifying but with my people around, I can do it" "So I'm "your people"?" "Yeah, you're my person" he smiles.

[straw-kid]

As He Falls In Love With You...  - Diego Brando Oneshot. 

JJBA Steel Ball Run Headcanon

It was at the Steel Ball Run race when Diego laid his eyes on you. When he rode next to you, he would stare at you with a sullen expression. He always passed you at Silver Bullet, leaving you with dust on your lips, what a annoying guy. He always seemed to want to show himself to you.

Full of himself.

Diego was very unsociable. He didn't talk to anyone, he just scowled at the Steel Ball Run members. He never smile.

For Diego, feeling some curiosity in wanting to know who you were was something that messed with his ego. Why would he want to know who you were?

Pfff you are pathetic! 

But damn, to watch you hold the bridle of your horse with a strong expression, with a desire to win the race, oh my... what good looking...

It was on an extremely hot day that you can't keep up with the race, your horse is tired, sweaty from ears to hooves. It would be fair to stop and rest. Uuuh what a terrible day. You tethered your horse and left it under one of the few shades that held a horse. You, on the other hand, almost sunbathing. Sweat ran down his forehead. Would you be able to continue this race alone?

You take the canteen, empty. Ah, bad luck.

That's when you hear a distant gallop getting louder and louder. It is then that you recognize who is there. Diego.

You give a heavy, dry sigh. "What is this guy doing here?" you think with yourself.

That superior expression washed over you and all you did was look away. Diego didn't say anything, he never speaks, and it's in that moment of intense silence brought by him, that you notice, he was a strong figure, an aura of power, it was as if he controlled the sound around him, for a moment not even Silver Bullet's hooves echoed.

Diego approached. "you look awful" took a canteen from his things. "here, drink it" it was the first time you heard his voice. it was more serious than you expected to hear.

You divide the water by filling your canteen with Diego's water. "ah ah ah, I need it more than you. It's not because I'm being nice to you that you might take advantage of me." He take his canteel back. 

"tsc" You make a mean face. "Don't look at me like that, if I didn't share it with you, you wouldn't make it past today".

Diego was bold in his words, a bit full of himself. In addition to the canteen, he offered a few snacks for your horse.

After that moment, everything seemed to be over, that diego only showed a mere pity for you and continued the race alone, but it was not what you expected. Diego then makes you a proposal. "You look like you're carrying a lot of junk on your horse. I wouldn't do that with my Silver Bullet if I wanted to win.... However, the path ahead will get colder. We're going up some hills."

Indeed, you carried a lot of junk. But as the Steel Ball Run courses were, it was definitely important that you were prepared. It was impressive the fact that Diego carried almost nothing in Silver Bullet, it made sense that he ran like the wind, he was light as the wind.

Without delay, Diego got right to the point. "I would need support during this route, as you can see I also don't have so much water because we share it. So let's make a deal, I'll take you on the safest and fastest route of this race and you give me shelter with firewood.”

It was a fair deal. you wanted to win and you weren't in the best of conditions to continue, Diego knew different paths but he wasn't going to be able to continue for that long.

"Sure" you say shaking Diego's hand and at that, he opens a naughty smile. And because of the newness on Diego's face, you not only noticed the perky lips, but what preceded his face. Diego have hazel eyes, how big and full of life they were.Diego had a harmonious face when he wasn't with a grumpy look. You felt something.

You found out that day, Diego was a pretty boy. 

Riding with Diego was like riding alone. He didn't talk to you, very silent, he just warned you about something far down the road, it was like he smelled the dangers and you had no idea how he was so good at it (his stand but you just don't know about this OR even know that this exists!)

Resting in makeshift camps with him was awkward at first.He was bossy, told you what to get and what he needed, criticized the way you arranged things, but as time went by, you got used to his way, and also, he stopped bossing you around.

Diego's company was pleasant even though he was someone in a bad mood.

Diego would never tell you this, but since he decided to give in his ego, to have you for company, it was comforting. 

There were nights when you shivered with cold, and he stoked the fire instantly. There were days when you hadn't eaten enough and Diego would say "I don't need all of this, if you don't want it I'll throw it away". You have been noticing these subtle gentle behaviors. He didn't know how to be kind.

As the journeys passed, he became more sociable with you. Having said that, he started talking more. You had kept the following information with you: a big fan of coffee, he liked the strong taste that comforted with the heat. He enjoyed the company of animals more than that of people. Too much noise disturbed him to think and sleep.

Although Diego became more talkative, he didn't bring up many facts about himself and you were more interested in that, but it seemed like asking him that was too much. Without having the facts spoken aloud, those being watched spoke much more about him.

Diego likes to eat, even if it's a goo or a delicacy from an expensive restaurant, he'll eat, no matter how much he complains, any food seems to please him. He is very fond of family, from the little he tells about his tragic childhood, he always speaks highly of his beloved mother, he seems to like the idea of ​​being surrounded by people he likes, or dreams of. In moments where you catch him off guard, he's looking at you, but he doesn't turn away when that happens.

Normally you turn, it's embarrassing!

Diego is always looking after you. But it is no longer like someone who is angry about something, however, relaxed eyes, Diego has a calm look for you, and only for you.

You  guys didn't break up after the deal, you're an unbeatable duo. You like being together. Sometimes Diego passes by you and always touches your shoulders and very rarely, touches your waist, but when you do that to him, he tends to dodge his back, you never understand.

Yeah, Diego touches you sometimes, rubs your back when cold, touches your arm when want attention, touches your hand when need to make a quick move. But don't try to do that to him, he will give you a grumpy look.

There was only one moment when the touching was more intense than the casual ones. The race was intense and Diego had hurt his forehead. you had demanded that he let you help him, he was proud, he wouldn't even let him pay triple the prize of the race. With that said, you left him in agony on the floor overnight. In the middle of the night, you woke up, with a bad feeling. Diego was lying down badly, he had a fever. He was weakened, it would not be possible to continue like this.You took his head and placed it in your lap, so you could handle his face well, clean the wound properly, and help with his fever. Your icy fingers touched Diego's hot forehead, who contracted his eyebrow in disdain, he knew it was you with him. You ignored his expression. You took his hair off his forehead, tucking it behind his ear, wiped the damp, warm cloth on his forehead.

Without realizing it, you massage your blond hair with one hand. Angel hair, fine and light, it glistened in the firelight.

Even though it was no longer necessary, you didn't remove the cloth or hands from Diego's face anymore and he had nothing but the expression of tranquility on his face.You slide your fingers across his features. Dry, plump lips, thickly wired brows, strong jawline. 

What a man to be in your lap right now, right?

Suddenly, you feel a hand touch your back, slide gently to your waist and meet your hand, Diego took your hand, waking you up from your trance. He looks you deep in the eyes and places a kiss on the back of your hand. "Thanks Y/N, you sure are sweet". He smiles. 

You are simply on fire from the heat you felt.

That never happened between you again, Diego was someone too closed for any interaction that required a lot of personal space.

Even if you didn't know about the existence of stands, Diego always used it to protect you, sensing danger for miles around and smelling fruit or animals to hunt, however he would never tell you or show you, maybe that would spoil something, maybe it would make you think he was a scary monster.

Diego is like that, he only demonstrates from afar without being direct.

[cozzzynook]

Ratchet and Drift like Rodimus and are trying to court him. However they think Perceptor is trying to court him as well.

They find out Rodimus is having what they assume to be a date with Perceptor in his room. They decide to interrupt and find the two cooking together.

Perceptor is teaching Rodimus some family recipes. They are surprised because they didn't know Rodimus could cook.

The two of them barge into Perceptors hab and see Perceptor teaching Rodimus an old family recipe that he planned on making for them the next night. While Beainstorm is working on a project on the kitchen table that Perceptor told him to stop hours ago. With Perceptor angrily glaring at the two when for almost breaking his door and scaring them.

“to what do I owe the displeasure?”

“Uuuh,” Drift at least looks sheepish after the shock wears off but Ratchet still looks incredulous which is annoying Perceptor and Rodimus is just confused.

“What are you guys doing here?”

“We uh..”

“Carrier, you didn’t blow them off did you?”

And the two mechs found themselves sputtering for two reasons, one of which being that they didn’t know Perceptor had a kid, that kid being Rodimus.

“Carrier!?”

“Oh yeah, he’s my carrier…sorry carrier,” Rodimus looked guilty and Perceptor patted his cheek plating in comfort, “it’s alright little flame. Keep cooking, I want to have a word with the two.”

“Gentlemechs..lets go to the back room for a talk.”

Perceptor started walking towards a door with a bolt and the two mechs looked like they were about to transform and high tail it.

“Don’t run. It’ll only make him angrier,” Brainstorm went back to working on his device and Rodimus looked like he was watching a funeral pass.

“I’ll…ask him to be nice,” Rodimus went with them to the back after the putting the fuel on low.

They were so glad he followed them inside.

[canirove]

Broken Hearts Football Club | Chapter 20

Previous chapter | Next chapter

Masterlist

"Uuuh, the revenge dress is back" John laughed. 

"I totally forgot about the Christmas party and it was the first thing that I found" June said while checking she had everything she may need in her purse.

"Well, you look hot as hell, you should wear it more often. Like... Maybe on your next date with Chilly? When is that happening, by the way?"

"I don't know."

"June, did you fuck things up again?"

"Of course not!"

"Then why haven't you met again?"

"Because we've been busy. But I'm stopping at his place on my way to the party."

"Then you can start forgetting about it" he chuckled.

"What?"

"The moment he sees you with that dress in his front door, he'll drag you to his room and…"

"Shut up, John!" June said again, feeling her cheeks getting warmer.

"Just a warning" he shrugged.

"Whatever. Have you seen my keys?"

"I think that crazy cat of yours was playing with them earlier.”

"What? John! I can't be late!"

"To shag Chilly?" he said with a mischievous smile.

"You are so annoying" she replied. "Help me find the keys."

"Ok, fine. You are too stressed and getting laid will definitely help, so let's get this over with."

"John!" 

"I'm just teasing you, June" he laughed. "You look so cute when your face looks like a tomato."

"And you look really cute with my fist on your nose."

"Ok, ok" John laughed again. "Let's find your keys so you can go give Chilly his Christmas present. Which isn't something sexual" he quickly added when he saw the look June was giving him. 

━━━━━━❃━━━━━━

“Merry Christmas, Chilwell.”

“Merry Christmas, Maxwell. Please come in.”

“Thank you” June smiled, taking off her coat. “Sorry I am a bit late, but I couldn’t find my keys and… Ben, are you ok? Ben. Chilwell!”

“Uh?”

“Are you ok?”

“Yeah, yeah. It’s just… your dress.”

“Please don’t tell me I ripped it getting out of the car or that it is covered in cat's fur.”

“No, no. It’s perfect.”

“Then why are you looking at me like that?” she asked.

“Because it is perfect.”

“You aren’t making any sense, Chilwell.”

“It is the dress you wore at the Sky party last season, isn’t it?”

“It is. Why?”

“I haven’t been able to stop thinking about it since that day.”

“About my dress?” June laughed. “I knew you were into fashion, but I didn’t know you were so into it.”

“I’m into you wearing it” he said, finally looking her in the eyes.

“What?”

“I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you wearing that dress.”

“You… haven’t…” June mumbled.

“That night I realized that June Maxwell was more than an annoying girl who also happened to be an amazing football player. She also was hot. Very hot” Ben said, slowly walking towards her.

“Oh.”

“Oh” he repeated, now standing in front of her. “I couldn’t keep my eyes off you that night. Didn’t you notice?”

“Back then I wasn’t paying you the same attention I do now” she said with a nervous laugh. 

“Yeah…” he replied, biting his lower lip and making June suddenly feel really hot. 

“So, umm… Your Christmas present.”

“Is this my Christmas present? You wearing this dress?” he smirked.

“What? No… no, no no. This is” she said, showing him the little bag she was carrying.

“Shame” he sighed.

“Yes, umm… Your present” June repeated, putting the bag in front of her and hoping that it would somehow stop whatever was going on between her and Ben.

“Wait… You actually made it!” he smiled as he opened the bag. “I thought you had forgotten about my beanie!”

“I had other customers in case you forgot.”

“Did you also embroider the girls' initials on theirs?”

“Just on yours. Is it too much?”

“It’s perfect, June. I love it” Ben said with a smile that made June’s heart skip a beat.

“Put it on. I used John as a model but I think your head is bigger.”

“Rude” he chuckled.

“I’m not being rude, it’s a fact. Does that sound familiar?” she smirked.

“Nope” Ben laughed. “So, how do I look?”

“As I expected. Stupidly handsome” June sighed.

“Sorry” he replied with another smile while grabbing her by the waist and pulling her closer to him, the space that she had put between them gone again. “Thank you very much, Maxwell.”

“You’re welcome, Chilwell” she gulped, the heat she had been feeling earlier also coming back. “Do you want to do something before I have to leave?”

“I do. I want to do this” Ben said before kissing her. 

━━━━━━❃━━━━━━

“There you are” Vittoria said as June walked into the party. “Where were you?”

“Trying to survive the chaos. First I forgot to pick a dress for tonight and had to go through my whole wardrobe to find something nice. Then I couldn't find my keys because Pepper had been playing with them. Then I got stuck in traffic…”

Which wasn’t a lie. But the real reason behind June arriving late, was the make out session she and Ben had had. Leaving him had been extremely difficult. 

“Have I told you yet that I love that you called your cat Pepper? Chilly... Pepper...” Vittoria smirked, making June roll her eyes. “Anyway, come. Lauren has been asking for you nonstop, I think something happened.”

“Something like what?”

“I don't know. By the way, is this the Versace dress from the Sky party? The revenge one like John calls him?”

“Yep.”

“You know, now that you and Chilly are back to being friends, you should ask him if the dress had the effect John wanted. If seeing you wearing it made him hard.”

“Vittoria!”

“What?”

“We aren’t alone, lower down your voice.”

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry. But you should ask him. Knowing what happened after, I think I know his answer” she smirked again.

“Yeah, whatever. Let’s go find Lauren” June said, trying to change the topic. Because she already knew that the dress had had the response John had been looking for when he chose it for her. 

━━━━━━❃━━━━━━

"No" June and Mason said at the same time.

"C'mon, guys. You are the captains, you have to do it!" Lauren begged.

"And it is Christmas. Can't you put aside whatever happened for just one night? Please?" Reece pouted.

"Ok, fine" June sighed. "But just because you two are the most annoying siblings ever and I can't say no to that face."

"Thank you" Reece smiled. "Mount?"

"No" he said, crossing his arms over his chest.

"Mase, bro… C'mon."

"I don't want to be anywhere near her, Reece. End of the story."

"Seriously, Mason? It's just a stupid speech, nothing else. We do it and then you can go back to ignoring me and being bitter" June said.

"Bitter?" he laughed. "I'm not bitter, Maxwell."

"That's not what people say."

"What people, uh? Chilly? I know he forgave you and that you are back to sucking his dick."

"I'm not…"

"Ok, ok" Lauren said, stopping June mid sentence. "It's Christmas, remember? A time for peace and love. So let's leave the sexual comments for another day and focus on what matters now. The speech."

"Exactly" Reece said. "Will you do it or not?” 

"I will. But Mr. Mount here is too obsessed with what I do in my personal life" June said.

"Maybe because it is with my best friend? The one you said you didn't have feelings for?"

"Mason, I already apologized for lying to you. What else do you want me to do?"

"Oh, so you do have feelings for Chilly" he laughed.

"Yes, I do. Happy now?"

"Do you love him?" he asked.

"Mase, I don't think this is the moment to ask something like that" Lauren intervened. She knew better than anyone how much June struggled with talking about her feelings.

"It's complicated" she replied.

"It isn't, Maxwell. Do you love Chilly, yes or no?"

"I…"

"Guys, it's time for the speech" a Chelsea staff member said, interrupting the conversation. "Are you ready?"

"I am" June quickly said. She could kiss that woman right now.

"Mount?"

"Yeah, I guess" he sighed. "But you still owe me an answer" he whispered in June's ear as they walked back into the party. 

[sakurabutterflyart]

Take a Break Sweetheart 🧡💚 [COMPLETED](Delta Dawn x John Dory)

(WARNING: ENGLISH is not my first language)

John Dory is Delta's bestfriend. Who's obviously hitting on her. But as time went on, they've become inseperable. Even after so many rejections, they somehow still get along, also despite being so different yet similar in some way. Though she can't see why. There's something about John that she felt a sense of comfort around him, where she can be herself around him.

Delta stared at his bestfriend, preparing coffee for the both of them as she continue on her work as Mayor in Lonesome Flats. The blue haired troll caught the lady staring at him, then gave him a soft flirty smile, causing her to scoff at his goofiness.

"What's with that look? Are you finally falling for me Ms. Mayor?" He gave her his most charming smile, that most Brozone fans will faint at the sight.

"In. your. dreams." She leaned in her palms, rolling her eyes as she looks away from the handsome troll. Though she admits, she can't deny that he has charming looks that can  make every girl swoon. Which almost got her too.

Ever since he came to the village, her exhaustion disappears simply by having his presence or company.

As he placed down the coffee, the red haired troll immediately stop writing all of her paperworks to take a little rest. She yawns, making John Dory look up noticing the fatigue of her eyes.

"Uuuh my dear Mayor,  how many hours did you sleep last night?" John Dory asked, narrowing his eyes. As she saw her shrug.

"Ummm, maybe 5, 3 or..." Delta mumbles as her voice gets very high pitch, clearly hiding something.

"Ms. Delta Dawn, did you sleep last night?" He asked again, getting her cornered.

"Uh... no?" She hesitantly answered, seeing his face ready to scold her, causing her to be a little angry about it. "Hey! Don't give me that look Mr! I'm the Mayor and Sheriff in Lonesome Flats! Don't expect me to just go around sleeping."

She scolded back,  as she took a sip of her coffee. Helping her ease her temper, by relieving her sleepiness.  The pop troll sigh, as expected from her best friend. Well that's what makes her hot anyway, her strong personality with a heart to look after her people is what also made him fall for her. But still...

"Look Delta you should really go to sleep, you haven't slept for 3 days now." He said worriedly.

"What? I did fall asleep, I took an occasional nap wherever and whenever I can." She argued back. "Plus I can't afford to rest right now. I have some fences to repair, some thieves to catch and also a niece to look after, to pick up from school and make dinner. "

John watch as Delta rub her head, stress showing on her face by just thinking of what she has to do for the following days. Becoming more worried that if she's even gonna make it through the entire day.

He sigh, took a deep breathe and whispered,  "You leave me no choice sweetheart."

He approached his beloved friend, walking behind her. She was confuse until he felt him slide his hands throughout her palms to her coffee mug to grab it, while his other hand grabbed her shoulder. Which made her heart jumped.

The women was used by her friend's touchiness, especially because pop trolls loves to hug every hour.

Both of them never really hug often. But John Dory enjoys physical touch, especially with fellow country trolls with his patting at the back, some high fives, handshakes and also some bro hugs. Both of them shared some physical touch too, with his hand kissed greetings, holding hands when he guides her to somewhere,  some back patting, also playing around with her hair to mess with her, tickles her so she can get annoyed to chase him around town and ocassional hugs too. She acts like she hated it, but she secretly likes it.

But this one's a little different, John Dory was too close, she felt her face burning by too much physical contact.  "What are you doing?!"

The women yelled. John Dory gave her his cocky grin, placing down the coffee and pulling her away from her desk preventing her to grab it. John Dory then lean in and place his head on her forehead, feeling her face's temperature. "Your face is heating up, you really need to rest now lady Sheriff."

"I'm heating up because you're too close, Mr. Idiot Detective!" She yelled, but receiving a smirk from him.

"Oh so you're telling me that you're falling for me Ms. Delta." He raised his eyebrows in flirtation,  causing Delta to lightly punched him.

"Stop messing around you idiot, I need to get back to work.  " She gets up, but realized her body is too weak to get up, falling back to the chair. She saw the man's face formed into an anxious expression, which somehow made her insides felt touched by his caring nature. 

"Woah, easy there." She felt the blue haired troll, starting rubbing her head, massaging her all the way to her shoulders. She can't even protest, it made her feel good from all the exhaustion.  Then she sense that her chair was pulled to the coach. John Dory then lifted her all the way to the coach, laying her down, with pillows and blankets  being placed.

"John Dory... I can't-" She muttered, feeling her eyes drop when she sense the softness of the pillow, ready to fall asleep.

"Shhh..." He sat down, holding her hand. "You need to sleep, I promise I'll wake you up soon."

"B -but what about... the... village... the thieves... my niece?"

"I'll take care of them." He whispered.

"I swear.... John... Dory, if something... happens in this village.... I'll kick your bloody face." She threatened,  making John Dory internally gulped, yet she's still very  beautiful even when she's angry. Internally laughing at the thought.

"Don't worry, I got this m' lady."

She finally let's go and lose consciousness, sleeping peacefully.  John Dory watched his friend fall asleep, admiring her beauty, sighing in relief that she's finally resting. Hesitantly stroking her hair.

"You're so stubborn." He said to her, lovingly gazing at her. He didn't want to invade her personal space and wanting to respect that.  But he can't help it, he place her beautiful red hair aside and gave her forehead a quick peck. "I love you... Ms. grumpy lady,"

He giggled then got up and left, proceeded working on her desk. The scarlet haired woman was actually awake, feeling her heart screaming in joy from what he just say. She opened her eyes, and look at her beloved friend doing her work. She was a little worried of what's gonna happen, but she trusted him, cause she's known him for almost a year now, he's been helping her around the village. He's also been able to raise his brothers on his own and being able to work at the band, while managing finances in a young age.

"How did I get so lucky..." She thought. 

"I love you too,  idiot..." She whispered, drifting off to sleep.

[mixelation]

Ask meme: Karin / Sasori

send me the rarest of pairs and i'll tell you if i ship it & how it would work

i'm into it aesthetically, but i think they're too..... idk, similar?? for me to fling myself into shipping it. like.... they're both meticulous and prickly in similar ways they don't really think "mesh." i don't think Karin would entertain Sasori's insane art opinions, and I think Sasori would find some of Karin's eccentricities extremely annoying. but also i do like both characters a lot, so i'd probably click on a fic out of curiosity

uuuh concept:

they match on ninja tinder. it is ENTIRELY because they mutually think the other one is pretty

the first couple dates go well. karin is like "yeah i do...... biological research...... in a ninja village that totally exists and isn't a crime against all elemental nations......" and sasori is like "im an artist do NOT ninja-google my work i am NOT a serial killer"

sasori is on ninja-tinder to do this very complicated dance where he builds up a relationship with someone he thinks is pretty and then he uses that to fuel his art when he murders them. karin just wants to smash and not get caught by the ninja feds

anyway they both end up at a seedy hotel and get each other's clothes off and

sasori: what the fuck, i do NOT like your scars. would you mind if i stepped out for a bit and got you some new skin

karin: FUCK you, you don't even have skin. if i wanted new skin id make it myself. like i'd fuck a guy who doesn't even have skin

sasori: ugly. let me get you new skin

karin: freak. i'm going to grow YOU skin, see how you like it

mid-way through trying to violently force skin grafts onto each other they decide to make out instead

[nevraeldarya]

If you get Isekai-ed in Twisted Wonderland what would you do ?

Well me personally it depends :

In the case where I still have the plot knowledge:

1- I'll pray that I have a System even the Original Game Mechanism will do, and knowing how Isekai in Games works, there is a 100% chance that a System will be there.

2- If I have a System, I'll make sure to learn basic physical skills, a powerful punch and kick should put the boys straight.

3- Resources, if Rook can use his bow and arrows then I too will learn how to use that thing to hunt my own food. Cause Crowley is a piece of shit, I mean have you seen how he threatened us with taking food during chapter 3 ??? Sure he didn't say it out loud but hinted at it.

4- Knowing my dumbass I would be dead back in the real world so searching for a way to get citizenship is a MUST do.

5- The magic hammer, I shall get my hand on that thing.

6- Money ? The System covers that with Missions.

7- Relationships, uuuh what can I say ? The Dwarf Mines thing will never happen with me there I would let the trio deal with that shit alone, I am not the "Oh I should make sure the plot progress as it should" kind of person, bitch fuck that shit ! I want to live and I am clumsy as fuck, besides with how annoying Grim is I would have beaten some respect in him, that's why I would hope that Yuu is there to deal with that part, I am realistic not an idiot thank you.

Also being friends with Ace is a huge no for me, cause let's be fr for a moment and lets push our love for him to the side, are you telling me you're gonna become friends with the person who mocked you the first time they spoke to you ? The answer is no, of course not.

Not to mention at the rate that I am in, Idia has a better chance of getting friends more than me. (<_<)

8- I will NEVER make a contract with Azul, keep that golden trap away from me, so if Yuu isn't there to deal with it, I will never sign that shit to save anyones ass, you caused yourself that problem now swim in it.

Another Note : With Yuu being there it means we get kicked out from Ramshackle because they are stupid, and I am a vengeful person, I will make it so hard for them to finish that contact which means, one way or another I'll get that picture before them hide it, then sneak in Azul's vault take the Idiot Duos contract and keep it (not Deuce I love Deuce) and never let them get away. (Yes I am horrible)

9- When I get my shit together move away from Sage Island and live in peace. But that will take a long time. And if I have to suffer so does everyone.

Now In case I don't have a system but still know how the plot goes :

1- Get the magic hammer

2- See if Glyphs work (Owl House Fan) if they do good ! If they don't shit

3- Same as above, learn how to use a bow and hunt for my own food.

4- Follow the idiots to the Dwarf Mines and get the blot stone before Grim eats it and make sure HE DOES NOT EAT IT ! Then innocently walk up to Ortho who will scan me, ask for the blot rock for research I innocently ask why, he explains takes me to Idia who explains more and I ask something in exchange for it, I will explain to him that I am from another world, can't return and need citizenship, he will accept because hey ! Blot rocks are good for research !

5- Go around for a job, see if Sam can hire me if he can't... well Azul it is but I am bringing Ortho with me to help me get a good deal so I won’t get scammed.

6- If the Glyphs do work then I'll be praying for a Palisman, I guess ask the fairies if they have a tree seed that looks like a blue snail carapace ? If they do have it good, if they don't have it, well there goes another dream in the air.

7- Publish "Villain/Villainess Trope" cause Twisted Wonderland most likely doesn't have that, I will ask Ortho to help me by giving me tips on how to make it popular quickly.

8- Learn how to use potion in the case where Glyphs don't work, I mean have you seen what Yzma does with those things ??

9- Eeeh try to live a good life while I can.

In case I don't know anything :

1- Try my best

2- Die at the Dwarf Mines...... yeah.