#It gives us more to do while we wait for Chapter 6 to release properly and the next story event to come out

[gfl-neural-cloud]

Daiyan's character event is coming!

The character event [Magrasea's Lang Syne] will be made available together with the ★3 Doll Daiyan.

〓Duration〓 1/25 0:00 -  2/14 23:59  UTC-8

[walker-extended-universe]

Chopped At The Roots, Chapter 7

Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3, Chapter 4, Chapter 5, Chapter 6

Relationship(s): Ben Perez & Cassie Perez, Cassie Perez & COrdell Walker

Tags/Warnings: Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Rape Recovery, Revenge, Hurt No Comfort, Torture, Death, Murder

Summary: Cassie won't get revenge for herself, but that's okay. That's what brothers are for.

Written for @whumptober Day 19: Abandoned Cabin

Taglist: @theladywyn, @ihavepointysticks, @klaatu51, @itsjessiegirl1, @neptunium134

----------------------------

Ben and Cordell knew Cassie wouldn’t want them to go after Mulligan. She won the case, he was fired, the problem was solved, she would be back to work in a few weeks after some mandatory leave, she would be fine, etc, etc.

As true as (some of) that may be, they knew this couldn’t be the end. Sure, Mulligan had been fired. But in a few months (thanks to a rotten plea deal), he would be out walking in the world, free as a bird. Who’s to say he wouldn’t try to retaliate against Cassie or even hurt someone else?

No. Mulligan had to be handled appropriately. If the legal system wouldn’t do it, sometimes a little vigilante justice was necessary. Even Cordell could admit that.

They had time to plan, thankfully. Cordell called in a few favors to keep an eye on Mulligan and make sure he wouldn’t get out early. And Ben gave up one of the spare rooms in his apartment for their planning. They couldn’t exactly let anyone else stumble on their murder plot.

It was extreme, yes, but it had to be done. And neither of them were going to shy away from that fact.

One benefit to living so far away from all your neighbors was that, even on the far corners of the property, you would find yourself in a pretty remote space. So remote that even the people who lived there may not come around.

The Walker ranch had a few places like that. Old bunkhouses and storage sheds that were no longer needed as operations had changed with the times. One such structure was still mostly in good shape and had been kept up as a “vacation cabin” for a while, though it hadn’t been used in years. Cordell just needed a little time to fix it up for their guest of honor. Nothing special, just toss down a few tarps for easy cleaning and make sure no one would get tetanus. They planned to use his truck for transport as well, since Ben couldn’t exactly fit a body in the trunk of his Prius.

Not that the body would be transported for long, but it was good to be practical about these things.

The day of Mulligan’s release, they were almost ready. Cordell did his part to keep Cassie distracted, looking for any random leads he could find that were worth “investigating” while Ben did his share of amateur tailing work to get a sense of Mulligan’s schedule. They couldn’t risk someone looking into the bastard’s disappearance too soon, after all.

Waiting those few weeks to make their move was near torture. There was nothing Ben wanted more than to just nab him and do the deed, but Cordell knew they had to be careful. One wrong move, and not even his badge would save them.

But it was so deliciously worth it, in the end.

Catching Mulligan outside his favorite watering hole, driving him to the abandoned cabin, and dragging him inside by the heels was already a thrill. Getting to properly punish him? Well, that was almost downright fun.

“You know, Mulligan, most men download a dating app or go to a bar if they want to get laid,” Cordell stated calmly as he crushed the man’s hand under his boot. “If you really liked Perez that way, you could’ve tried just asking her on a date instead of going the ‘Nice Guy’ route.”

Mulligan screamed and writhed on the floor, unable to do much else thanks to the restraints Cordell had installed in the floor. “You two are fucking insane! Let me go!”

Ben hummed. “Well, we could do that. Or-” He stomped hard on Mulligan’s groin, smirking at the scream that erupted from him. “-we could give you a taste of what you put my sister through. What do you think, Cordell?”

“I think we’re not even remotely done here.”

They broke a few more bones before they moved on to the fun stuff. Cordell took a step back and let Ben handle the knife.

“You know, what gets me about all this is that you raped her because you thought she wasn’t good enough to be on the force with you.” Slice. “You thought she was too weak, too feminine, too Puerto Rican.” Stab. “But, in the end, she was stronger than you.” Cut. “Because you hurt her, but she still stood back up.” Twist. “More than that, she refused to ask for help.” Slice. Stab. Twist. “And now, you’re a disgrace and she’s been welcomed back into the office with open arms.”

From the look on Mulligan's face (or, what Cordell could see under all the blood), Ben’s words were cutting him just as much as the knife. Still, he wasn’t broken down just yet. “Your sister’s a bit-”

Ben punched him square in the jaw. “Don’t talk about her,” he hissed. ”You don’t have the fucking right!”

Cordell let her get a couple more punches in before pulling him back. “Don’t hurt your hands too much,” he whispered in his ear. “We don’t want her getting suspicious.”

Ben panted, his fists shaking. “You’re right, you’re right….”

Cordell slowly let him go and Ben stood up. “Let’s finish this trash,” he muttered.

“You think he’s had enough?”

“No, but it’s not humanly possible to give him enough.” Ben grabbed the knife out of Mulligan’s leg and drove it right into his heart.

They watched Mulligan spasm for a few more minutes as he died before they started to clean up the mess. Ben took care of the tarps in the cabin, cutting them up and putting them in trash bags for dumping later. Cordell took care of the body, carefully sawing it up and preparing the pieces for burial at a few places he’d picked out around the ranch.

Mulligan didn’t deserve a proper burial, nor a funeral.

When they were done, they went back to their respective homes, and played like nothing had changed. Cordell played a game with his kids, and Ben spent an hour on the phone with Cassie talking about her day.

Later in the week, when Mulligan was officially reported missing, Cordell didn’t bring it up to Cassie. Ben pretended not to hear anything about it when she saw the news.

There was a short investigation, but with no witnesses or leads, it didn’t go anywhere. Given his record, it was assumed he skipped town.

And that was perfectly fine with them.

[haechanokeh]

I'm Right For You [pt.1 ]

[teaser/ prologue] [ 1 ] [ 2 ] [ 3 ] [ 4 ] [ 5 ] [ 6 ] [ 7 ] [ 8 ]

✓ I recommend listen to Die For You by The Weeknd every time reading this story 😌

pairing: popular college! mark x average! reader

genre: romance, smut, angst, series.

warning (this chapter): HIGH SEXUAL TENSION, masturbation and sex dream.

warning (the series): corruption, oral sex (both receiving and giving), cream pie, rough sex, anal sex, mention of religion, rough sex, self-esteem, psychology, public sex, sub! reader, sex toys. possessive mark two-faced mark

word count: 2.3K

I think I'm right for you, babe. You know what I'm thinking, see it in your eyes. You hate that you want me, hate it when you cry. It ain't workin' 'cause you're perfect and I know that you're worth it I can't walk away. (Die for you by The Weeknd)

Mark was the least classmate you want to be pair with, Not because he slacks, not a good student because god knows he’s an excellent student. you just don’t like how different from you, it was unexplainable but you feel so intimidated- you can’t even look straight into his eyes. mark receives a lot of recognition and everyone adores him. he’s very kind.  everyone wants to hang out with him well mark is very friendly, he's really a good influence they say. he doesn't smoke, he drinks but not that much, plus he encourages the class to attend bible study- his father is a pastor. but you never hangout with anyone unless it's school related.

“my house? y/n? are you listening?” he lowered his head to check your face looking down on the textbook the whole time. he grabbed your attention, your eyes quickly shifted anywhere but him. 

“ah... ahm i’m good with library, i don’t want to cause any inconvenience.” you politely rejected his suggestion to where you can do your case study in clinical pharmacy. it’s just it doesn’t look good if a girl is alone with man in a house.

“but we can’t talk properly in the library.” he reasoned, and you knew he has a point.

“ahm, maybe in coffee shops?” no, you heard mark dislike going to coffee shop just to study, he said the key to ace the exams are study at home or library. studying in coffee shop causes inconvenience too for people who truly want to enjoy coffees. 

“okay fine. your house.” you sighed. he showed his infamous smile.

❁ ≖≖✿❁ ≖≖✿❁ ≖≖✿❁ ≖≖ ❁ ❁ ≖≖✿❁ ≖≖✿❁ ≖≖✿❁ ≖≖ ❁ ❁ ≖≖✿❁ ≖≖

mark said that they have visitors in their house so both of you decided to go you didn't know that mark lives in a fancy condominium. his house look so expensive, you very conscious to move, afraid that you might break something.

"what are you standing there?" he chuckled and put down his bag on the floor beside the couch. you're standing still on the doorway. "sit here." he patted the long sofa next to the couch.

you quietly walked towards the sofa and sit on it, stiffly which made mark chuckle again.

"do you want water, soda, tea, coffee, or me?" he winked, teasing you. you blushed, and you really despise that feeling every time he's around. you don't like it when he makes you flustered.

"water." you brushed off the intimidation. your tone changed slightly like you're annoyed.

mark could easily read people, he's really good at it. he knew you dislike him but something in your eyes say different. mark has been building this sexual tension between you for so long already but it still amazes him that you always block it. rather giving up, he was motivated and it became an addiction. he wanted tou so badly.

"okay water it is." he just said.

you opened your bag and get your notes in chemistry. you saw mark’s phone light up, and you saw his phone wallpaper. it was just in front of you, his wallpaper is a girl facing down on the table as if she's sleeping but what caught your eyes the most is that her matching bracelets with written bold letters life. then you analyze whether it was you, you have the same hair color and the two rings in the middle finger too. you literally froze, analyzing what's going on.

"y/n, here's your water and a sliced of cake that my brother baked." you almost jumped when he appeared. his brows met in confusion when he caught you so surprised. he put the tray on the table. "something wrong?"

your mouth felt dry.

"n-nothing." you stuttered. mark gave you an unconvinced look but just shrugged. he reach for his phone. you suddenly feel thirsty so you reach for the glass of water and drink it.

"ahm... who's on your wallpaper? ah- your phone light up i think someone texted you." you said returned to gulping the water

"you." he casually answered. you chocked and spat out the water from your mouth. the glass slipped from your hand and thank goodness it landed on your thigh safely but you clothes became wet.

mark only watched you while laughing on your cute reaction. you glared at him.

"i'm sorry, you're just too cute." he apologized suppressing his laugh. mark sat beside you and grabbed the glass from your lap and put it back on top of the table. "i still don't get it why you never notice my signals." he said, wiping your face using the sleeves of his sweater.

it sends you shivers, his touch did but his mischievousness no. you were slightly annoyed.

“you don’t like me huh.” he pretend to be hurt.

“stop playing.” you said and look down on your shirt. “my shirt is wet now.” 

mark stare at your silhouette shirt and your flesh and black bra are showing in front of his eyes. 

“i think i should go home.” you were disappointed, both of you haven’t accomplished anything yet.

she’s going home? like that?

“you can barrow my shirt for the mean time.” he stood up.

“really? thanks.” you stood up and follow him.\

i just confessed but i don’t think she get it. she’s really something. a small smile plastered in his face but you weren’t able to see it since his back was facing you. 

he opened his door’s room and he went in with you. you slightly observed his room, nothing special but there’s a lot of book on the shelf and two kinds of guitar. he loves music and ready, you find it amusing though. your eyes followed him getting shirt from his closet. 

we walked towards you.

“here.” he gave you a generous smile. he extended his hand to give you his shirt. you reached for it and once your hand was on it he swiftly hide it behind your back causing you to stumble on the his bed.

“i’m sorry.” you sat up and you froze when he stand in between the first thing you saw was his clothed abdomen. you looked up and the unfamiliar mark was now looking down on you. 

"i just confessed to you y/n, are you aware or just pretending that it didn’t happen, hmm?” he caressed your cheek that gave you goosebumps.” do you hate me? despise me? but why am i seeing in your eyes, you want me and you hate it weren't you?"

the air became thick, your mouth just parted and eyes staring at him. you're still processing what he said, it made you question your hate towards him.

hate was a strong word, you don't hate him but you hate whatever he made you feel, like right now. you're heart is going crazy. you just realize that you really like it and it's hard for you to admit because you know that he will do not good to you. you will just get hurt because he will never like you back, but that's not the case anymore. although you're doubting his confession, you seemed to love the idea of having him.

you gulped, your throat became dry once more. cat got your tongue and your brain stopped working- you can’t even process what’s going on. it was gentle but it feels icy like his voice and eyes. he’s not mark, at least that’s what you think.

“mark... i- what’s-” you have no idea what you want to say. 

he slowly and carefully traced your parted lips. mark felt arouse thinking how good it feels to sucked by these tiny mouth of yours. he lifted your chin using his thumb and middle finger and with no hesitations he captured your lips. you lost your sanity. you melted and so as your surviving rationality. 

he cupped your jaws and he deepened the kiss, tongue inside and he locked your mouths. the sensation went straight to your core. you felt like the world stop revolving around the sun and heat just absorbed mark’s room. the sloppy and wet kisses became louder than the aircon. heat rose from your chest. you were unaware but your hands were on the back of his head playing with his hair. he released a smug smile which you did not noticed.  this is your first kiss, no one ever kissed you... well you never had a boyfriend.  

a wicked idea won in mark’s hand, his hands skimmed down your body until it reached you thigh. he parted and caressed it. but it was a bad idea for him, senses snapped back on you.

you quickly separated your self, pushing him and you stood up. you quickly get up from his bed. 

“I need to use your toilet, excuse me.” your heart was pounding loud and you feel so hot. you walked passed him and walking to his room. 

mark quick on his feet before you even enter his bathroom not a toilet. he turned you. 

“why did we stop?” he groaned eyes glued on your lips.

“if you’re bored and just want to play, please not me Mark.” you begged, lips quivering because you know deep down in you, you’re close to giving in. His eyes masked with darkness, jaws clenched. he stepped forward and you step back. you don’t like it when he’s too close. you hate the feeling of being weak.

“do i look like i’m playing with you?” his voice was deep with a hint of annoyance. it was your first time to see mark like this.

mark who’s always smiling, laughing, friendly, caring,  generous, and everyone adores. was now gone. in your eyes he’s like a tiger targeting its prey. it didn’t help you’re in his den and back against the wall.

“mark, i want to go home." you faintly whispered still looking straight in his eyes. you felt so small, like a prey waiting, ready to be eaten.

"do you hate me that much?" he was reaching for your cheeks but you flinched. mark was offended by your reaction. "i never been bad to you y/n, tell me what did i do to you to make you feel this scared of me." he tucked your hair behind you ear.

"i'm not scared." you almost choke when you said that. mark chuckled at your cuteness. "you're just different to me and i don't know how to act around you." his brow raised.

"i feel uncomfortable mark, can i go home?" it took a lot of courage to say that. you just want to runaway. he smiled sadly, admiring your angelic face. eyes wide open with innocence looking up to him, he felt the unfamiliar urge to dominate those eyes.

"i guess you hate what ever you are feeling towards me, but unlike you I won't runaway." he traced the side of your face, it send shivers down to your core. "because I just simply can't walkaway."

he stepped back and tucked his hands on his pants.

"you can stay, i will not do anything to you. let's finish our case study on the living room." he went back, giving you his familiar smile. the atmosphere changed, the coldness vanished and changed into warmth.

you felt at ease.

"thank you." you said and you're quick on your feet, leaving his room.

mark watch you left from his room, he erased his pretentious smile.

"how long will this last, fuck." he groaned in frustration.

awkward but bot of you at least accomplished and solved the case. he offered you to drive you back home but you insisted that he doesn’t have to but he was so persistent that you have to lie about running errand and meeting your mom.

❁ ≖≖✿❁ ≖≖✿❁ ≖≖✿❁ ≖≖ ❁ ❁ ≖≖✿❁ ≖≖✿❁ ≖≖✿❁ ≖≖ ❁ ❁ ≖≖✿❁ ≖≖

sleepiness caught you the moment your body touched the bed.

“mark...” you faintly moaned and covered your mouth as you watch mark thrusting his fingers on your slick producing squelching and sucking your clit. 

"oh my gosh, i'm gonna cum!" you squealed and your legs started to shake. he crawled over you, hovering your naked body.

you finally met his eyes that almost melt your knees.

"i though you hate it? should i stop?"

“NO!” you gasped, and woke up from your strange dream. you sat up and was catching your breath. you felt something sticky between your thighs, shame enters your system and guilt.

"what am i thinking?" you whispered to yourself.

you felt ashamed over your dream doing something dirty with mark, however the other party was thinking of you non stop.

❁ ≖≖✿❁ ≖≖✿❁ ≖≖✿❁ ≖≖ ❁ ❁ ≖≖✿❁ ≖≖✿❁ ≖≖✿❁

mark stroking his dick, eyes closed while imagining your mouth wrapped around his cock.

"fuck, right there y/n." he moaned, after few thrust he spurted his white thick liquid.

his chest rose heavily. staring at his hands filled with his cum, there was no disgrace in his soul when he masturbate and thinking of you at the same time.

mark is always contented whatever he has, he's very simple minded but things went wrong when you caught his attention. for the first time, he want something- your body and your attention.

he thought, he wanted to be greedy, he needs to be greedy.

"will not do anything? at least for today huh?" he chuckled bitterly as he remembered what he said awhile ago to you.

"no holding back." he seriously said and wipe his hand on the blanket.

hello, i'm sorry for grammatical errors. i hope you enjoy it there's nothing much in this, just sexual tensions for chapter 1 ♥️

and i hope you like it, here's the chapter 1. @mellowvoidexpertfriend

[helliontherapscallion]

Bonding (Adrenaline Junkie Chapter 12)

Part 1     Part 2     Part 3     Part 4     Part 5     Part 6     Part 7     Part 8     Part 9     Part 10     Part 11     Part 13     Part 14     Part 15     Part 16     Part 17

Spotify Playlist (collaborative)

Warnings: nightmares, swearing, mentions of death/injury

Word count: 3,383

(A/N): it feels good to get back to this story

A week and a half went by in a flash. In that time, you and Arthur grew closer. You absolutely loved how he was so interested in innovation and engineering, you felt like he was the perfect choice for your apprentice. To pass the time, you would teach Arthur the basics of redstone working. You taught him everything from how to properly store it to the beginnings of using repeaters. Occasionally, Philza would join you two in lessons.

“Then, you just connect the repeaters together with redstone and set each for the desired times. Et voila! You have properly working timed pistons.”

Looking up from your demonstration, you stifle a chuckle at the two sitting in front of you. Arthur, the ever vigilant student, was frantically scribbling down notes into the journal you gave him, his face scrunched in concentration and his tongue poking out the corner of his mouth. Your father, however, looked downright confused. The poor man was staring down helplessly at the two repeaters in front of him, the whole set up he had looked slightly flimsy in structure. Redstone dust messily formed a line between the iron contraptions with the occasional tiny break in the dust. Judging by the positioning of the repeaters themselves, they were in the right place but they were haphazardly placed. Sure the positioning of the two repeaters relative to each other would work, but it was just something that you wouldn’t do. You always hated clutter in your contraptions. The only true flaw in his build was the messy line of redstone. 

You walked over to the table your dad was working at and started to explain why the machine wasn’t working. “So your only mistake here is the cleanliness of your redstone. With it being this messy, there are plenty of potential breakages of the wiring,” you gently swept the redstone into a neat line with your hands and watched as the entire contraption glowed red. Pistons started moving in succession of each other in timed bursts. “One more thing, just a little nitpicky thing, the repeaters are set right, they’re just… messy?” You watched as Philza watched the movement of the pistons with a blank look before he looked up at you with a slightly annoyed look. 

“Other than that, the settings of the repeaters were set right!” You sheepishly grinned at him before realizing that he wasn’t going to be reassured by your weak reassurance. You looked over to Arthur, “Arthur buddy you wanna try?”

You watched as his eyes lit up in excitement as he looked up from you from over the brim of his journal. Without a word, he quickly got to work. You and Philza watched him as he continuously looked between his journal and his work.

“I didn’t know working with redstone was so hard. I just thought it was easy with how fast you invent things,” Philza said dejectedly. 

You reached over to pat him on the back, “it took me a while to figure it out. I remember four years ago when I started I was completely lost.”

You felt the vibration of his chuckle, “I remember when you almost crushed your wing in a piston. You were so lucky it only caught the ends of a few primary feathers.”

You chuckled bittersweetly, “not that it matters. I lost that wing a few months after that.”

You could practically hear his mind start churning, “but you made a new one, you can still fly.”

“It’s not the same Dad. I hate having to spend thirty minutes putting the sensors on my back. I can’t feel the air moving through my feathers anymore. It feels like a part of me is constantly missing and this hunk of useless metal doesn’t take that feeling away.”

He fell silent as he continued to watch Arthur work. You always felt bad whenever you dumped your trauma on him, he was always looking for ways for you to feel better. But there were just some things that couldn’t be fixed with reassurances and small gifts. He didn’t understand that and you didn’t have the heart to tell him that his kind and caring nature would never get you your wing back. It was gone forever and nothing can bring it back. 

You tried to not be bitter about it, it happened three years ago afterall, but you couldn’t help but feel a bitter taste on your tongue and a pang in your heart whenever someone mentions a time when you still had both wings. Whenever someone mentioned you having both wings, you could still remember the feeling of the air working itself through the nooks and crannies of the spaces between your feathers, the way that both wings would hang off your bed because they were too large (you never got to ask Philza about how he covered his wings), the way that they would both puff up behind you when you tried to intimidate your brothers during a snowball fight. You didn’t want those memories, they were of a better version of yourself. You didn’t want to be reminded of what could’ve been if you didn’t go deeper into that damned cave. 

“...Sorry, that was uncalled for.”

“Don’t apologize, I should’ve realized how you felt before bringing it up.”

“It’s not your fault, you didn’t know.”

You watched as his eyebrows furrowed and he looked at you with confusion, “why’re you just now-”

“(Y/n) I think I did it! Come look!”

Without a second glance at your dad, you hurried off to inspect Arthur’s contraption. It was perfectly set up; the redstone was in a neat line with no breakages, the repeaters were set perfectly and spaced evenly apart, and the pistons were successfully moving together in timed spurts. 

You grinned at Arthur, “well done! This is perfect, you’ll be moving onto making your own inventions in no time. I couldn't have asked for a better apprentice.”

Arthur basked in your praise and listened to your words like they were being sung to him by an angel. He was practically beaming with how proud he was of himself. If the redstone smeared on his cheeks could be activated by emotional response, it would be glowing a brilliant red. 

You reached out to wipe away the redstone from his cheek with your thumb, “why don’t you go clean up so we can grab some lunch. I bet you’re hungry.”

“I’m not hungry, I just wanna work with you more!” Arthur tried to convince you, but the rumbling of his stomach told you otherwise. You chuckled as the redstone slowly got camouflaged into his reddening puffed out cheeks. 

He looked away in embarrassment as he started to stalk up the stairs, “...I’ll go clean up.”

Alongside teaching Arthur the basics of what you know, you were working on a plan to somehow release the souls from the Warden’s captivity. You felt a sort of survivor’s guilt when you thought about how you returned to your family and Hugh did not. Your family could survive without you, but Hugh was Arthur’s only family. It was unfair that such a kind, loving boy had his only family ripped away from him at such a young age when he needed his brother most. The least you could do for Arthur was free his brother’s soul from it’s endless torment. 

You kept a journal that you would write out your plans in. The plans ranged from fighting the Warden with your very limited swordsmanship to blowing the entire cave to smithereens. No matter what plan you came up with, it would always result in you getting seriously wounded or dying for the last time. Most of the plans you came up with wouldn’t work anyways; the Warden was just too powerful. Asking Philza or Techno was out of the question, you didn’t want to risk their lives. That, and they would never let you go kill it. This was something you had to do on your own. 

The mere thought of facing the Warden stressed you out extremely, giving you more and more nightmares about the monster. 

The Warden somehow entered your house. You could hear it’s booming footsteps working its way through the hallways and stopping at each room. You could hear how it slaughtered your family brutally. You could hear their screams slowly becoming integrated into the horrid cacophony of the souls’ as their souls were absorbed into the Warden’s being. Finally, as the Warden reached your room, you could hear your family’s voices over the harsh screaming of the other souls.

“You promised me that you wouldn’t let it get me.” Arthur.

“I thought you’d always protect me.” Tommy.

“Why’d you let me die?” Wilbur.

“I’ve done so much for you and you just let me die.” Techno. 

“It should’ve been you.” Philza.

Just as the Warden’s clawed hand swung down towards your face, you bolted up from your bed and flattened yourself against the wall scanning your room for the Warden. There was not a single thing out of place in your room. You wiped away the tears that were streaming freely down your cheeks and grabbed your automatic crossbow you had leaning against your wall. Grasping it with an iron grip and your finger hovering over the trigger, you reluctantly left your room and made your way down the hallway. You opened Philza’s door and peered into his room. You could see his wings sprawled out behind him and his chest rising and falling gently. He was still alive. You closed the door quietly and made your way to Wilbur’s old room where Arthur was currently sleeping. Bracing yourself to find his corpse, you opened the door.  You only saw a mop of brilliant red hair poking out of the blankets. You couldn’t see movement, oh god was he even breathing? You rushed over to his bed and pulled back the covers. 

You could see his peaceful face looking back at you. Putting your hand under his nose, you held your breath as you waited for air to hit your hand. Finally after what seemed like forever, you felt a gentle burst of air hit your hand. You covered Arthur back up and stalked out of his room. Your family was alive. The Warden was still in that cave. It was just a dream. It was just a dream.

You glanced at the clock, it was about half past four in the morning. You’d have to wake up in about two hours, so you just made your way down to the kitchen to make yourself a cup of coffee. Not that you’d be able to go back to sleep after that nightmare anyways. Time moved infinitely around you as you became engrossed in your thoughts. You needed to make better plans to kill the Warden. You needed to be better. 

You didn’t notice when Arthur and Philza entered the kitchen. You were fully zoned out staring at the now cold cup of coffee in your hands, lost in thought. It wasn’t until you felt a hand on your shoulder that you snapped out of your trance. Recoiling violently and reaching for the crossbow you had propped up against the chair, you whipped around and pointed the weapon at the thing that touched you. Instead of the Warden standing there ready to devour you, you were met with a startled Philza stepping back with his hands in the air. Arthur was hiding behind him fearfully. 

Your eyes widened as you lowered the crossbow. You could feel your wing start to puff up and retract itself back in reflecting your horror as you hastily put the crossbow back onto the table. “I-I’m so sorry, I didn’t- I wouldn’t do that. Shit what time is it, I haven’t made breakfast yet. I’ll start. I'm sorry.”

You pushed passed them as you rushed over to the chest and pulled out the ingredients to make pancakes. Your shaky hands struggled slightly to pour the exact measurement of flour before someone stopped you. 

“(Y/n), I’ll make it.” It was your dad once again.

“No, I got it.”

“(Y/n), I’m not asking. Go sit down.”

You sighed as you started walking to the table. You could hear Arthur’s breath hitch in his throat when you grabbed the crossbow and stalked up to your room to hide it. You could feel guilt, shame, and horror rise up from deep within you from what you almost did. You couldn’t believe that you almost just shot them because of your stupid delusion. It would’ve been fatal too, your automatic crossbow never failed to kill. It was one of the many downsides to the weapons you invented, you had to live with the fact that people are getting killed because of your inventions. In a way, you indirectly killed many people per day. 

You walked down the stairs as slowly as you could so you could avoid having to face them. You couldn’t forget the look of pure fear on Arthur’s face as he hid behind Philza, you were the cause of that. You promised that you would protect him and he fully trusted you to do so. This morning you took that trust and destroyed it the second you reached for that crossbow.

When you reached the dining room, you sat down as far away from Arthur as possible. You could hear Philza pause his movements when he saw you enter the room before he started stirring again. He was probably trying to see if you came back with a stronger weapon so he could protect Arthur. You were a monster.

Soon enough breakfast was ready and a hefty plate of pancakes covered with maple syrup was placed in front of you. Breakfast went by quietly, the only sound coming from the clanking of silverware against plates. You didn’t eat much of your breakfast, you were too busy trying to think of a way to apologize to Arthur and Philza. In the middle of your thought process, you were interrupted by Arthur’s voice.

“(Y/n)?”

You jumped slightly and looked up at him, “yeah?”

“Can you look at my blueprint? I got an idea for something yesterday and I wanna see if you think it’d work.”

You looked at the young boy in slight confusion, “...Sure just finish your breakfast first.”

“I’m done, I’ll go grab it!”

Without giving you any warning, he jumped out of his chair and raced up the stairs.

“You gave us quite the scare this morning hun. What happened?”

“I’m sorry-”

“Don’t apologize, just tell me what happened.”

You sighed and ran a hand through your hair, “I just had a bad nightmare last night. I couldn’t go back to sleep so I just… came down here to wait a bit so I could make breakfast.”

“Nightmares are understandable, but why’d you have a crossbow?”

“I thought I needed something to protect the house if it came.”

“If the Warden came? I thought you didn’t get nightmares about it anymore.”

“Well, I still do, just a lot more frequently-”

Arthur burst through the door and ran over to you, slapping the paper on the table in front of you. You squinted at it, trying to decipher the messy handwriting. It was a layout of a secret door, which was popular in the world of redstoning. You didn’t have the heart to tell him that though, especially with how excited he was to show you what he made. So, you smiled at him.

“It looks good buddy, do ya wanna try to build it today? I can help you.”

“Yes! I’m gonna go get dressed so we can build it!”

He once again dashed up the stairs, leaving you and Philza alone in the kitchen. Philza chuckled, “he reminds me of Tommy when he was that age. Except… a little more mellow.” When you didn’t respond, he turned to look at you. “What’s wrong?”

You sighed, “he was so scared of me this morning. I promised to protect him and I almost ended up killing him.”

“...Ya know I almost stabbed you and your brothers multiple times when you guys were younger because you guys startled me right?”

You felt the corners of your mouth twitch, “of course I do, and you would always get us ice cream after.”

“Did you ever resent me for it?”

“No, you were just trying to def- oh, I see where you’re going with this.”

“Ever the keen one,” he chuckled. “Arthur’s more understanding than most kids his age, I bet he understands that you didn’t mean to do that. You just gotta make it up to him.”

“Alright, thank you Dad. I think I’m gonna go get dressed so Arthur doesn’t have to wait long. I think if I have him wait any longer he’s gonna explode.”

After you got dressed, you walked downstairs and grabbed the materials Arthur would need and a couple of extra supplies you might need. Walking outside, you were met with an excited Arthur. You two worked on his contraption all day. You knew exactly what he needed to do to fix any problems that arouse, but you only gave him little hints that would push him in the right direction. You wanted him to stop relying on you so much for the little things. Sure, you were always going to be there for him when he was stuck, but you wanted him to be more independent. 

Eventually, the sky took on hues of pinks and yellows as the sun started to disappear behind the treeline. “It’s getting late, Arthur. You made good progress today.”

He nodded as he walked alongside you back into the house as you led him to the couch. “Arthur?”

He looked at you, his brown eyes clouded with exhaustion and confusion. “I’m so proud of how fast you’ve improved. I have something for you.” You reached into your bag and pulled out a new pair of goggles and leather gloves.

“I know it’s not much, but-”

“I love it.” He whispered as he stared down at his presents in his hands. Without warning, he flung himself into your side as he tightly hugged your midsection. You froze before you wrapped your left wing around him in a feathery hug. Your hand reached up to stroke his hair as you chuckled. “It’s no problem kid, you deserve it.”

You two sat there for a bit before you patted his back, “dinner’s almost ready. Let’s go clean up so my dad doesn’t throw a fit. You have redstone and dirt all over you.”

After you two cleaned the dirt off from your faces and hands, you led Arthur down the stairs. You nudged his shoulder when you got to the end of the stairs, “race you to the kitchen!”

You broke off into a speed walk as Arthur started to sprint, laughing boisterously as the distance grew between you two quickly. Grinning, you shouted out, “oh no, I can’t go any faster! You’re gonna win!” 

You dramatically yelled out a stretched out “no” as he bolted into the kitchen and sat at the table. You sped walked into the kitchen and sat next to Arthur. “How’re you so fast? I couldn’t catch up to you if I tried.”

“Yeah, you’re a speed demon Arthur!” Philza agreed from the stove between laughs. He forgot how much missed having his kids race each other to the dinner table, having Arthur around the house was really refreshing for him. He was ecstatic that you were getting closer to Arthur, it meant that he was going to get another grandson soon. 

Dinner went by a lot smoother with laughter and banter being tossed around freely. Arthur would not take the goggles off and wore them proudly at the top of his head. Philza would cast knowing looks over to you when he was sure you were looking at him, which confused you, but you just brushed the feeling aside. You were happy sitting at the table eating with your little family; you couldn’t wait for your brothers and nephew to finally meet Arthur. They’d get along well with your apprentice. Until then, you have a mission to complete involving a certain monster. 

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[fanfic-archive]

Meeting the Baron (6/7)

Chapter 6. The Wilsons

Summary: Your short vacation is interrupted by a call from a friend. You head back to the States to help Sam and his sister fix up their family boat, and once you’ve finished Zemo is waiting for you to return to him.

Warnings: NSFW

Word Count: 4206

The sound of your phone ringing woke you up from a peaceful sleep. It was early morning, the sun just beginning to seep in through the curtains, casting a slight but warm glow through the room. With a groan, you rolled over and reached for the nightstand, picking up your phone and looking at the caller ID. Bucky’s name illuminated your screen, making you squint, before answering the call and bringing the phone to your ear.

“Hey, Buck. What’s up?” you asked, sleep audible in your voice, as you let your eyes flutter shut again.

“You sound like you’ve just woken up” Bucky commented, clearly more awake than you were.  

“I have” you groaned, hearing the movement of sheets behind you.

“Well, think you can make it back home for a little while?” he asked, making you wake up some more.

“Got news about the Flag Smashers?” you asked, eyes opening again, suddenly ready to jump out of bed and get ready.

“No, don’t worry…Sam’s doing this thing, getting the community together to help fix his family’s boat. I’m going to drop something off for him anyway so I’m going to stay and help. You coming?” Bucky explained and you let out a sigh of relief.

“Yeah, of course. How can I say no to that?” you agreed to go, always happy to help out your two friends, even when you weren’t in the country. You couldn’t help but smile a little more when you felt the man behind you shifting closer, wrapping his arm around you as his chest pressed against your back. “I’ll be there as soon as I can, I’ll be on the next flight” you assured him as you relaxed into Zemo’s hold.

“You still in Riga?” Bucky asked curiously as you started to feel Zemo pressing light kisses to the back of your neck.

“No, uh…decided to explore some more of Europe. It’s nice” you told him, being partially honest, obviously not mentioning the criminal…who was now trailing kisses over your exposed shoulder.

“You going to head back after fixing up the boat?” he questioned, wondering if you would be remaining in the States when you came back.

You looked back at Zemo, who lifted his head to meet your gaze. He didn’t speak but it seemed like he was waiting for your answer as well. “Yeah, I think so. But I’m always a phone call away if you need anything, same goes for Sam” you answered without breaking eye contact with Zemo.

“You better be” you could hear Bucky’s smile, which made you smile in return as you settled back down against the pillow, Zemo’s kisses against your bare skin resuming.

“Bye, Bucky. I’ll see you soon”

“See you soon”

Hanging up the phone, you placed it back down on the bed side table. “What do they need?” Zemo asked, finally speaking once the call had ended.

“Sam is having some people get together to fix up his family’s boat, help his sister out” you explained, turning around in his embrace to face him, resting your hands against his chest.

“Should I have travel prepared?” he offered without hesitation, surprising you a little. It was generous and you appreciated it.

“Please?” you looked up at him with an innocent smile and batting your lashes, the best pleading look you could muster.

“Consider it done, Meine geliebte” Helmut chuckled lightly to himself, wrapping his arm around your waist more securely.

Slipping your hands up his chest, one hand landed on the back of his neck as you lent up and kissed him. He instantly responded to the kiss, bringing one hand up to cup your jaw, deepening the kiss and making you hum in approval.

Normally, you didn’t like flying much at all. It wasn’t a fear of heights or anything that bothered you, it was the discomfort of it all. Waiting around in an airport before sitting in cramped seats for hours (especially if you were going somewhere outside of the States), none of it appealed to you and you would just rather avoid going anywhere than deal with all of that regularly. But your most recent flights had been more than comfortable, with excellent food and even better company. Instead of counting down the hours to your arrival, the plane was landing before you knew it.

You said your goodbyes to Zemo on the plane before getting into a car. You had no idea what he planned to do while you were with Sam and Bucky, but you assumed he would stay in the country. It made you worry for him, he would have a harder time avoiding arrest while in the States but, for some reason, he was taking that risk for you. Still, you were sure that he had a plan and would be fine. You would just make sure to stay in contact with him to make sure.

Finally, you had arrived at Sarah’s home, making you way through a whole community of people who were busying themselves with various jobs around the dock.

Getting closer to the house, you spotted Sam and Bucky talking to a woman that you recognised as Sam’s sister, Sarah.

“Hey!” you called to get their attention, waving when the three of them turned to you. “Sorry, I’m late” you apologise as you reached the trio.

“How did you even know about this?” Sam asked, clearly surprised to see you here. Bucky must not have mentioned it.

“Bucky called me” you told him, chuckling when Sam gave Bucky a small glare. “Oh, come on, I have some practical skills and some time to kill. Let me help” you knew that Sam wouldn’t like the idea of bringing you all the way to the US to help repair a boat, but you really didn’t mind.

“Thanks for coming” Sam was glad to see you, so he decided against chastising the two of you and settled for giving you a smile and a hug instead.

After pulling away from Sam, you gave Bucky a hug and then turned to Sarah.

“Hi, I’m Y/n” you introduced yourself, holding your hand out to her. You only knew her from what Sam had mentioned of his family, the two of you had never actually met.  

“Sarah” she shook your hand with a smile. “Do you know much about boats?” she asked, releasing your hand.

“Honestly, nothing at all, but I’m a quick leaner. You can put me on lunch duty if you need too” you offered, happy to help in any way you could.

“Come on, we have plenty of jobs for you” Sarah smiled, both pleased and amused by your enthusiasm.

You were on the boat with Sam, helping him strip away the rusted metal to be replaced with new stuff.

“So, how are your travels going?” Sam asked, starting up a conversation.

“I was in Vienna when I got Bucky’s call, it’s nice. It’s kinda nice to be back, though” you told him with a smile. He smiled but shook his head at you, he had never seen you as the type of be interested in travelling. Then again, it’s not like you were actually in Vienna because of your wanderlust.

“Planning on going back after this?” he looked over at you, chuckling when he saw you struggling to pry the metal off. Not that he was doing much better.

“Unless something comes up with the Flag Smashers, yeah” you nodded.

“What got you so interested in travelling anyway?” Sam squinted at you, half joking but half teasing but half serious.

“I don’t know…I’ve been living in the same apartment, doing the same dumb shit for years. And it wasn’t much better before that. I just think it’s time that I try to find out what else is out there for me” you shrugged. “Who knows, maybe I’ll be back for good by the end of the year, but I have to give it a shot” you told him honestly.

Having seen you both struggling, Bucky wandered over, grabbing the rusted metal with his metal hand, and ripping it up with ease. Both you and Sam glared at him as he walked away without saying a word.

“Show off” you muttered, making Sam laugh to himself before you both got back to work.

The day passed quickly, filled with working on the boat and getting to know the people you found yourself working with. Before you knew it, Sarah was letting you crash on her couch. You and Bucky had offered to find somewhere else to stay but the Wilson siblings insisted on you both staying with them.

You and Bucky had fought over the couch, both of you trying to be the generous one, but Bucky reminded you that he normally slept on the floor anyway. So, you got the couch.

Despite working all day and your body being completely exhausted, you couldn’t sleep. Just staring at the ceiling of the dimly lit living room while your mind ran wild. And the main thing occupying your thoughts? Helmut Zemo.

You had been distracted all day but now that it was silent, you were thinking about him again. Thinking about what the two of you were and where you stood with each other. Where the two of you dating? You were staying with him, he took you on a date, you kiss, you sleep together…you had to be dating. But he was a criminal, the man who broke apart the Avengers.

Why would he come back for you if he didn’t feel what you felt? You weren’t an ex-Avenger or anything like that, you weren’t like Sam or Bucky, he didn’t gain any leverage by pretending to have feelings for you. You couldn’t offer him anything like that…so he had to feel the same way you did.

Then the question was…how did you feel about Zemo? You wanted to be around him as much as possible, you liked him…you liked him a lot. But could you properly be with him, knowing who he is and what he has done? Oddly enough, you found the answer being ‘yes’.

Whatever was going on between you both, you found yourself wanting to call him. And so, you did. You grabbed your phone off of the table and scrolled for his number. You hadn’t been stupid enough to put his number under his real name, just in case he called, or Sam or Bucky saw.

You hesitated for a moment, glancing over to Bucky, who was laying on the floor, to check he was still sleeping. He was, so you pressed call.

“Miss me already, Liebling?” Zemo’s voice came through the phone when he answered.

“You wish” you teased by just hearing his voice put a smile on your face. You didn’t want to linger on the effect he had on you or how hard you might be falling. “Just wondering how you are…where you went” you confessed.

“I have arranged a place to stay until you are finished. Where are you staying?” he asked.

“…Sarah’s couch” you told him, smiling again when you heard his disapproving hum. “Relax, it’s not that bad. It’s a nice couch” you assured him with a quiet laugh.

“Is that why you’re whispering?” he questioned.

“Well, Bucky is next to me, I don’t want to wake him up” you hummed in affirmative.

There was a pause for a moment, the line going quiet. “…repeat that” Zemo ordered lowly before you could question the silence.

The demand made you smirk to yourself. “He’s on the floor” you clarified. “Didn’t realise you were the jealous type” you teased. In reality, you really didn’t mind. You kind of liked that he was jealous.

“I’m not” he insisted, making your smirk grow. “How is the boat?” he asked.

“It’s all coming together. I’m exhausted though” you admitted with a small groan.  

“Must be all that manual labour” now you could hear Zemo smirking on the other side of the phone. Knowing you were working hard on the dock while he was probably in a soft bed with silky sheets.

“Should only take a couple more days” you informed him.

“Just call when you need me to send a car” he reminded you.  

“I’ll get a cab” you assured him, not needing him to send a car. You could live like a normal person for one day.

“I will send a car” Zemo insisted, leaving no room for argument.

“Alright…” you sighed, giving into him. “…goodnight” you figured you best try to get some sleep before morning came.

“Goodnight, Meine geliebte. Sleep well” his tone was sweet, sincere. You smiled as you hung up the phone, placing it back down on the table.

“So, that’s why you’re so eager to get back” Bucky’s voice from the floor made you jump.

“Holy shit” you chuckled nervously, playing it off that he spooked you, “I thought you were sleeping.”

“I was, you wouldn’t shut up” he groaned, rolling over to face you.

“Sorry…” you apologised, feeling genuinely bad for waking him. You knew his sleeping was even worse than yours.

“It’s alright. So…you met somebody?” Bucky asked, an amused expression on his face.

“No” you denied but he looked more than unconvinced. “Okay, maybe…yes, I met someone” you gave in, knowing you couldn’t lie to him.

“What’s he like?” he sat up, happy to annoy you but also interested in learning more about what was going on with you.

“…treats me well, he’s nice” you told him, just glad that he hadn’t heard Zemo’s voice over the phone.  

“Well, that’s vague” he laughed to himself, “you could’ve brought him with you.”

“Absolutely not” you scoffed. There was no chance in that happening.

“Worried we’ll embarrass you?” Bucky asked jokingly.

“Of course” you joked back, the two of you laughing.

“What are you two gossiping about?” Sam asked as he walked into the room. He had only come for a drink until he heard the two of you talking, he thought you would be asleep by now.

“Y/n’s new boyfriend” Bucky teased, like a child.

“Boyfriend?” Sam asked, eyebrows raising in surprise as he looked at you.

“He’s not my boyfriend” you rolled your eyes.

“But there is someone?” Sam smirked.

You just groaned in annoyance, picking up your pillow and holding it over your face, hearing them both laughing.

Finally, the work on the boat was finished and the three of you were going your separate ways once again, but Sam and Bucky seemed to be becoming better friends, which you were happy about. The three of you were standing outside of Sarah’s home, saying your goodbyes.

“Good luck, Buck” you gave him a smile as you pulled away from the friendly hug.

“You too” Bucky nodded, patting you on the shoulder before grabbing his bag and leaving.

Sam smiled at you as you turned to him. “You’ll make a wonderful Captain America, Sam. And not just because Steve thought so” you told him as you pulled him into a hug.

“Thanks” he nodded, seeming to take your words seriously. “Have fun with your boyfriend” he teased as you pulled away from him.

“Shut up” you rolled your eyes with a huff before grabbing your own bag and walking away. “Don’t hesitate to call!” you shouted back over your shoulder as you left, while Sam just waved you off with a shake of the head.

Just like he promised, Zemo had sent a car that brought you back to the private plane. You could really get used to living like this.

“Welcome back, Miss L/n” Oeznik greeted you when you entered the plane. “Did you enjoy your trip?” he asked, offering you a glass of champagne.

“I did, thank you, Oeznik” you smiled, accepting the glass as he stepped aside for you to join Zemo before disappearing to give you both some privacy.

He was sitting in one of the chairs, his own glass of champagne in his hand. “How did it go?” Zemo asked as you sat down opposite him.

“Good. They decided not to sell the boat, but it looks like everything is going to alright” you told him, sipping from your drink.

“I’m glad to hear it” he nodded, drinking from his own glass.

“…I think Sam is going to take on the shield” you mentioned, curious to see his reaction.

“Ah, the new Captain America” Zemo hummed, obviously not a fan of the idea or the title.

“Don’t look like that. I actually agree with your opinions on idols but…they’re going to have a Captain America and it has to be Sam. Who knows what would happen if we got a new John Walker” you sighed, knowing Sam was the best candidate for the role.

“I might actually agree with you” he confessed with a small nod, making you smile. “And James?” he asked.

“I think he’s getting better. You know that list of his?” you asked, and he nodded, “I think he’s realised what he needs to do, I just hope he can move on afterwards. He deserves it.”

“The Flag Smashers?” he asked.

“No news. They’ll call me if there is” you finished updating him.

Before you knew it, the plane was in the in the air and you were on the way to wherever you were going. “So, where are we heading?” you asked.

“I thought I’d take you somewhere new” Zemo smiled, getting your interest as you tried to guess where he was taking you this time.

You glanced out of the window and the ground miles below before placing your glass down and standing up. “You know, Baron…” you hummed as you approached him, placing your hands on his shoulders as you straddled him. “…I missed you” you confessed, shifting to make yourself more comfortable.

“I missed you too, Meine geliebte” Zemo looked up at you, hands instantly settling on your hips as he lent back into the comfortable chair. His confession made you smile, and he noticed.

Leaning in, you captured his lips in a kiss. It wasn’t needy or rushed, but it was passionate, like being away for only a few days had felt so much longer. You both groaned quietly into the kiss when you shifted your hips, accidently brushing against him and making his grip on your hips tighten.

“Oeznik could come in” you whispered, pulling away from the kiss when you both knew exactly where this was going.

“He won’t, not unless I call for him” Zemo assured you, running a soothing hand up and you’re your waist. “Just have to be quiet, Vöglein. Can you do that?” he asked, pressing a kiss just below your ear, earning a soft sigh from you.

You just nodded, though you weren’t actually so sure that you would be able to remain silent. But you cupped his face in your hands and kissed him again anyway, with a newfound fervour. You meant what you said, you had missed him, you wanted this, needed this, but you knew that you had to be quick.

You tried to pull away from the kiss, smiling when Zemo followed you, hands sliding up your waist and back. After keeping you against him for a moment longer, he broke the kiss and lent back again.

He released you when you moved to stand up, your hands making quick work of the fasten of your jeans. You shimmied out of your pants and underwear, kicking them to the side before beginning to climb back onto the chair.

Stopping you from straddling him again, Zemo gripped your hips. He manoeuvred you to stand between his legs and lent forward to trail kisses over your stomach. As he pressed kisses to your flushed skin, hands holding up the hem of your tee-shirt to give him better access, you ran your fingers through his hair, admiring the way he looked and the way he touched you.

Once he finished with scattering kisses over your stomach and hips, making sure to leave a small bruise on your hip as a small reminder for later, he lent back and pulled you back down onto his lap, making you yelp in surprise. But you found your balance pretty quickly, hands gripping his shoulders as you adjusted your knees on either side of his hips.

A hand on the back of your neck pulled you down into a heated kiss while you dropped your hands to his lap, shifting back a little to unfasten his belt and pants. He helped you pull his pants down just enough to free him before grabbing you by the hips and pulling you back into place, so that you rocked against him in a way that made you both groan into the kiss.

Pulling away from the kiss again, you glanced over your shoulder, paranoia about getting caught resurfacing. “Liebling…” Zemo spoke gently, his fingertips grazing your cheek and making you turn back to face him, “eyes on me.”

You nodded, circling your arms around his neck as you lowered yourself down onto him. A sigh falling past your lips and your forehead dropping against his shoulder as you stilled, adjusting to the feeling of him. His hand soothed up and down your back, nuzzling his face into your hair as he held you close.

Zemo kissed your temple before you lifted your head, beginning to rise and fall in his lap. You couldn’t help it, but a moan escaped you when you found the right rhythm. To shush you, he pulled you down into another kiss. Muffling the noises that the two of you made.

You knew that you had to be quick, you didn’t have the time nor the privacy that you had that night after dinner in Vienna. There wasn’t time to savour everything but there would be time for that in the future, right now was needy, a quick ‘I missed you’. Zemo also wished that there was more time, wanting to cherish you like you deserved, but he also knew that there would be time for that later.

“Fuck…Helmut…” you breathed, burying your face into his shoulder to quieten yourself. Zemo’s head fell back against the headrest, eyes falling shut as he dug his fingers into your hips.

It wasn’t long before he sensed that you were both teetering on the edge of your climaxes, causing him to bury his fingers in your hair as he lifted your head from his shoulder to look at your face. Your teeth sunk into your bottom lip as your movements faltered, becoming less controlled.

Feeling the rush of your release coursing through you, you pressed your lips to Zemo’s, muffling a moan of his name. His high directly followed yours, the two of you holding each other and breathing heavily as you came down from your highs.

Your forehead rested against his, eyes shut, lips parted, and skin flushed. Zemo pressed a light kiss to your lips, running his hands up your bare thighs, before going back to admiring the way you looked on top of him.

“Du bist wunderschön” Zemo complimented sincerely, a fondness, an affection, in his tone. You had learnt a little bit of various other languages during your time with Zemo, mainly just the petnames and compliment that he would endlessly give you. The compliments were frequent but always sincere, it made it difficult to doubt him when he called you beautiful like he just did. You just smiled, gently caressing his cheek before tenderly kissing him again.

With a soft sigh, dropped your head to his shoulder for a moment. Zemo just smiled, turning his head to bury his face in your hair.

Knowing you couldn’t sit there for much longer without any pants on, Zemo helped you off of his lap, fastening his pants and belt as you pulled your underwear and jeans back on. Before you knew it, you were back in your chair opposite the Baron, Oeznik pouring you both fresh glasses of champagne while you shared glances and soft smiles.

“When can we expect your friends to call again?” Zemo asked once the two of you were alone again.

“Whenever the Flag Smashers make their next move” you told him with a sigh.

“And after that, what are your plans?” he was watching you intently, like he was trying to put together your answer before you even spoke.

“After that, when the job is done, I’m all yours” you smiled, not hesitating on your answer. You liked the idea of having all the time in the world to spend with Zemo but right now you had helped start a job and you had to finish it.

“Now, that sounds like an agreeable conclusion for the both of us” Helmut’s mouth twitched into a small smirk as he sipped from his glass.

“It does” you agreed with a small laughing, shaking your head at him.

“I’m glad you decided to stay, Meine geliebte” Zemo confessed, his expression falling serious as he looked across at you.

“So am I, Meine geliebte” you said with the same level of seriousness, earning a fond smile from the Baron before you both finished your drinks.

Meeting the Baron Taglist:

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[cheri-translates]

[CN] Victor’s Birthday R&S

🍒 Warning: This post contains detailed spoilers for an event which has not been released in English servers! 🍒

Victor’s 2021 birthday collection:

🐼 r&s ♡ l belonging date l video call l moments and texts l asmr

[ Released on 8 January 2021 ]

[ CHAPTER ONE - Special Present ]

Victor is about to welcome his 15th birthday.

This year, the first birthday present he receives is, as usual, from Little Vick’s zoo. Standing in his room and seeing the box filled with animal plush toys, Victor frowns in slight resignation. When he was young, his parents asked him which was his favourite animal. Without putting much thought into it, he gave the panda as an answer. Since then, he’s been constantly receiving all sorts of presents featuring pictures of pandas from his parents. When he was 9 years old, he even “owned” an actual panda.

As what his father says, since it’s rare for Victor to express that he likes something, there’s definitely a need to fulfil his wish.

Even though he doesn’t dislike this gift, he finds it a little difficult to handle when the zoo sends him a huge box of souvenir plush toys since he shares the same birthday as Little Vick. Other than these, the box would also contain photographs of Little Vick’s everyday life, taken by the rearing staff. Victor would keep them, and send the plush toys to the children of relatives.

[Note] In CN, the panda’s name is 言言 (Yan Yan). But MC used the name “Little Vick” in an EN Moment post, so I’m using it too!

This year, he plans to follow the same routine. Just as he tidies up the items in the box, a knock comes at the door.

“Please come in.”

He turns his head, watching as his father walks in and leans next to the door, a coat draped over his arm. It looks like he just returned from work.

“Are you done with work?”

“Mm. Dad freed up his weekend. Since your birthday is coming, why don’t we head out together?”

Victor looks at his father’s slightly fatigued expression, and contemplates for a while.

“Okay, as long as it isn’t too noisy.”

The man casts a fleeting glance at the cardboard box in front of his son, then offers a suggestion.

“Want to see Little Vick?”

“There are a lot of people in the zoo during the weekend.”

Victor answers very quickly. As such, the man recollects the places he’s taken Victor to in the past, attempting to find a location his son would like.

“What about the countryside park?”

“Okay.” Victor agrees, then raises his head to look at him. “Dad, has Aunt been at home recently? I’m thinking of sending these plush toys to her.”

Seeing the man nod, Victor takes up the adhesive tape and re-seals the box. Watching his actions, the man sighs in his heart.

Trying to figure out what this kid likes - it’s truly a difficult question.

-

[ CHAPTER TWO - Growing Up Problems ]

It’s a pretty long journey to the countryside park. Victor stuffs this year’s pictures of Little Vick into his backpack, preparing to flip through them along the way.

Actually, ever since adopting it, he’s never visited the zoo to see Little Vick.

He doesn’t really know how to define the relationship between himself and that panda. His neighbours call their three dogs “Boss”, “Second Boss” and “Third Boss”. The moment they’re called, they would rush to the owner, and are as close as family. But Little Vick needs to be meticulously raised by professional staff. Even if it’s given a name, it doesn’t mean it has become someone’s pet, much less a “family member”.

Moreover, everyone knows that a little kid can’t afford to rear a panda. Even if the adoption certificate has Victor’s name on it, he hasn’t offered anything personally. This makes him feel that his connection to Little Vick is even more indiscernible.

Precisely because of this, Victor is always a little surprised whenever he flips through the album featuring its growth. In just a year, Little Vick has grown by quite a lot, and looks like an “adult” - but it’s only 6 years old this year.

The car halts before the traffic light. The man leans over to look at the photographs in Victor’s hands.

“It’s grown quite a lot again. Animals always grow up more quickly than humans.”

“Mm.”

After a short silence between the two, Victor mutters softly.

“...I also wish to grow up quickly.”

Hearing Victor say this suddenly, the man is a little shocked, turning his head to look at him.

“Why?”

“Because there are many things I can’t do right now.”

The man deliberates on his choice of words. “The reason why Little Vick can grow up so quickly is because its lifespan is relatively short. But you're different - you have sufficient time to live out every stage properly.”

After the man finishes speaking, he doesn’t get a reaction from Victor for a long time. From the rearview mirror, he discovers that Victor seems to have sunk into a deep contemplation.

Could talking about such things be too heavy for his son’s birthday? The man lifts his hand to loosen his tie, planning to change the topic.

"But there’s still a chance for you to do things yourself if you want to.”

“For instance, you could try paying for Little Vic’s adoption fees.”

Seeing Victor raising his head, he continues.

“The adoption fees for Little Vick are in yearly instalments. Once you have the ability to do so, Dad won’t help you pay for them.”

Victor hesitates for a moment. “Doesn’t that still require me to wait till I’m older?”

“As long as you're able to earn money from me, it doesn’t matter how old you are. Didn’t you learn about the stock market simulator from Dad recently? I’ll let you use the profit in exchange for an equivalent value.”

Victor straightens up slightly in his seat, and asks in slight anticipation. “How much is it every year?”

"A hundred thousand yuan.”

[Note] Approximately USD$15,500

Victor lapses into silence for a while. To a kid, a hundred thousand yuan is indeed not a small number. Seeing his expression, the man prepares some words of comfort. However, he suddenly speaks.

“Okay, I’ll give it a try.”

-

[ CHAPTER THREE - The Moment of Meeting ]

The car stops at the entrance of the park. Within it, father-and-son look at each other in dismay.

Five minutes earlier, the two of them were notified by the carpark staff that the park has temporarily ceased operations due to some internal revisions. As such, they have no choice but to head to another place.

“Looks like we should have given them a call to check first.”

Seeing the rare expression of vexation on his father’s face, Victor retrieves a map from the storage compartment. The both of them stare at it together, and it seems that the Loveland City zoo, which is only dozens of kilometres away, is the most suitable replacement.

“Shall we take a look?”

Sensing that his father is waiting for his answer, Victor hesitates for a moment before nodding in agreement.

After registering the adoption certification, the staff of the panda area enthusiastically receives the father and son.

“Little Vick’s birthday is coming soon. It’d definitely be very happy to see the two of you.”

Walking into the warm venue, there are excited visitors everywhere. With such an atmosphere, Victor starts feeling slightly expectant too.

“The one at the front is Little Vick.”

The staff brings the two of them before a glass room. At the front is a panda which is hugging a ball and amusing itself. Victor leans closer to the glass, giving it a detailed look. Little Vick seems to have been taken cared of very well. Its fur is fluffy, it looks sturdy, and refuses to let go of its favourite toy.

The man laughs inwardly as he watches his son subconsciously draw nearer to the glass. He even thought Victor didn’t like such adorable animals - it turns out he just refused to admit it. The phone in his pocket vibrates unceremoniously, and he signals to Victor, turning around to answer the call in a corner.

When it’s time for the pandas to eat, the rearer brings a large bundle of bamboo into the glass room. Seeing the look of anticipation on Victor’s face, the rearer specially brings a small bamboo leaf close to the glass. As expected, Little Vick sets down its toy and paces over. After circling the bamboo leaf twice, it suddenly lifts up his front paws and plops onto the glass. Victor is stunned, subconsciously bending down, reaching out to attract its attention.

The staff smiles as he looks at the boy and panda. “Looks like Little Vick really likes you!”

“...”

Saying that he wasn’t pleasantly surprised would be a lie. Victor looks at its slightly curved lips, and smiles along with it.

Should he greet it, or should he just stay like this quietly?

While he’s struggling internally to come to a decision, Little Vick slides off the glass, plopping its bottom onto the ground. Finding a comfortable position, its back faces Victor as it starts gnawing on the bamboo.

...as expected, eating is more important.

Victor hurriedly retracts his smile, straightening up to look at the back of its head. In order to alleviate the embarrassment from earlier, he broaches a new conversation topic.

“May I know,” he turns to the staff member at the side. “If it’s considered an adult now?”

“Yes, it’s already at an age where it’s seeking a spouse.”

“In that case, will it live together with its family in the future?”

“Pandas are very solitary, and Little Vick’s a boy. Even if it has children, it’d still lead a solitary life.”

As though in deep thought, Victor nods. Although these animals look charmingly naive, they aren’t as weak as imagined, and don’t need to rely fully on those around them.

As compared to them, perhaps he truly hasn’t grown up yet.

-

[ CHAPTER FOUR - Repaying Love ]

Returning from the call, the man sees Victor staring at the back profile of Little Vick. Even after leaving the panda area, he doesn’t speak.

“Why aren’t you talking?”

After a while, Victor responds.

“It doesn’t seem like it’d remember us.”

The man recollects the image he saw earlier. With some understanding, he nods.

“If we visit it a few more times in the future, it might remember.”

“But... so many people visit the pandas every day. I’m just one of them.”

“Victor, let Dad ask you something.” The man pauses in his footsteps and looks at him. “Without considering other factors, do you like Little Vick?”

Victor nods very quickly. The man continues with another question.

“After knowing it wouldn’t respond to you, do you still like it?”

After thinking about it for a while, Victor nods again. The man laughs slightly, bringing him towards the resting spot near the lakeside.

“Not being able to return the same emotions yet not affecting your liking towards it - isn’t this very good?”

“But it’s usually living in the zoo. We can't rear it personally. This kind of liking can’t establish any connections.” Victor seems to hesitate. “I remember you mentioning that the reason for “liking” is to establish connections with other people.”

The man pauses in his steps, turning his head to meet his son’s puzzled gaze. He sighs softly.

“What Dad tells you is not necessarily always true. You need to learn how to assess the appropriate occasion and target. You and Little Vick aren’t able to understand each other. Protecting it from afar like this isn’t a bad choice.”

Victor frowns slightly. These words are slightly confusing, and seem to contain things he has yet to understand.

“In that case, what if there’s mutual understanding?

A cool breeze brushes past. He watches as his father blinks, concealing a very small emotion in his eyes.

“A person who is willing to understand you is someone who is wiling to walk down the same path as you. If you meet that person someday, you must definitely cherish them.”

Because their original plan was to visit the countryside park, the man also brought the cake along. Since the scenery by the lakeside isn’t bad, the both of them select a bench and sit down. The man hands the cake box to Victor.

“Do you mind eating the cake a few days in advance?”

“I don’t mind.”

Victor takes apart the ribbon. Inside is a very exquisite cake, a small brand logo printed on the bottom right side of the chocolate sign. Perhaps noticing his slight pause, he quickly hears his father’s voice.

“...this year’s cake was bought.”

“It looks very nice. Thanks, Dad.”

“The zoo doesn't allow for the lighting up of candles. So we’ll blow out the candles and make a wish at home.”

“Okay, it’s all right.”

Victor carefully cuts out two slices of cake, handing one to his father. The two of them sit next to each other, eating cake while staring at the lake, neither of them speaking.

-

[ CHAPTER FIVE - Important Person ]

After returning home and having a bath, Victor walks towards his room with relaxed steps. While passing by his father’s bedroom, he vaguely hears him talking to someone over the phone.

It’s so late. Is he still working? Victor is about to continue walking, but his ears suddenly catch a few special words.

Weather, zoo, birthday... His father doesn’t seem to be talking about work, but about very trivial topics to someone. Just as he’s about to step away from the door quietly, his father calls out to him.

“Victor, come in.”

“It’s late and you aren’t asleep yet.”

His father sets down the phone, not giving him a reply. Victor glances at the screen which has yet to dim, and it displays that he isn’t currently in a call. His father doesn’t seem to know how to explain that “phone call”. After a moment of silence, he suddenly broaches another topic.

“Dad didn’t give you a present this year. You’re going to be 15 soon. Do you want something different?”

“You’re referring to...”

“For example, a present belonging to an adult.”

“Anything is fine?”

“Tell me what it is first.”

After giving it some thought, Victor scans his father’s room. Most of the items are either things he already owns, or things he doesn’t need in the far future. After taking a look around, his eyes fall back onto his father - to be more precise, the dark coloured tie he’s wearing.

“I want to buy a tie.” Victor pauses, then adds on. “One with a darker colour.”

Actually, there have been many occasions when he’s needed to wear a tie, and he doesn’t lack them. But most of them cater to his age, or are for school performances, and he doesn’t have one which is formal. Also, considering his mother’s preferences, the colours and patterns of the ties in the closet are very outlandish. One of them even has panda badges on it.

Perhaps thinking about the same image, his father suddenly laughs.

“Okay, you’ll pick one yourself tomorrow. But I have a condition.”

“Go ahead.”

“The reason why we didn’t light candles or make a wish this year is in hopes that you’ll say it directly when you want anything in the future. Especially when it comes to important wishes - you need to tell them to important people as soon as you can.”

“However, if it’s something I can do, I don't want to trouble someone else.”

“To some people, it isn’t troublesome.”

After saying this, he tousles Victor’s hair. Victor seems to comprehend it vaguely. In the past, he used to teach Victor how to be independent, so why is he suddenly changing his attitude?

Could it be that someone like his father has moments when he wishes to rely on someone else too?

-

Returning home the next day after buying the tie, Victor is once again called into his father’s bedroom. The two of them stand properly before the full-length mirror.

“The pattern of a tie is very critical, but tying a suitable knot is also very important.”

He watches as his father retrieves a tie from the closet, turning around to face him.

“Today, I’ll teach you how to tie a formal knot.”

“Okay.”

Before being taught, Victor never expected that such a complicated knot existed. Even though he follows his father step-by-step, the final knot ends up being crooked. Refusing to give up, he removes the tie, giving it another try.

“Does this knot have a name?”

“Eldredge Knot.”

“What occasion requires such a knot?”

His father doesn’t give him a direct answer. “The more complicated the knot, the more important the occasion. Even if you were to only use it once, it’s worth preparing for it.”

Victor watches his father in the mirror. He doesn’t say more, and simply tells him to practise by himself before turning around and leaving. Victor spends an incredibly long time in front of the mirror before he finally ties it into shape.

When he turns around, wanting his father to check it, he sees the wedding photograph of his parents out of the corner of his eye. This photograph isn’t foreign to him, but he still takes a curious, careful look at it.

With this, he finally understands what his father meant by “occasion”. In the photograph, the knot the father tied is the exact same one.

-

[ CHAPTER SIX- A flowing love ]

One more photograph of Little Vick nibbling on bamboo appears on Victor’s desk. Even though there’s a huge “generation gap” between him and Little Vick, the way it eats seriously without being picky is worthy of acknowledgement. Victor thinks - if he can fork out the adoption fees and enable it to lead a healthy and happy life, it counts as a one-sided, reasonable expression of liking it.

Aside from studying, Victor spends a lot of time over the following days researching stocks intensively. After a couple of transactions, he manages to recoup more than his original investment. This sale enables him to accumulate enough to cover the adoption fees. With the success of the stock market simulation, his father, as agreed, deposits the money into Victor’s savings account.

“Next year, you can see Little Vick with pride.”

“It’s fine as long as I can continue providing it with a good life.”

The man sighs in his heart when he looks at Victor’s small, deliberately stern face. It appears that he’s still troubled by Little Vick not remembering him.

"However, I heard that it could have its own children soon. Could I continue adopting its children?”

The man is a little surprised, but responds seriously.

“It’s your own decision. You have to ensure that you have the ability to do so in the future.”

“I’ve done some calculations. Before I turn 25, I can repay you for all the adoption fees over the years.”

“Does this count as your wish?”

“No, it’s a plan.”

The man chokes up for a moment. Even though Victor is at an age where nothing daunts him, he rarely boasts. If he can truly walk down the path he has planned, it’s truly worthy of admiration.

There may still be much his son has to learn, but he’s wiling to believe in him. But before that, he still has to return to the previous question.

“So what's your wish?”

The self-assured mini adult suddenly grows uneasy after hearing this question.

“I wish... that you’ll see me as an adult next time.”

“Hm?” The man displays an amused expression.

“If there are certain things I can do, you can let me shoulder them for you.”

At the sight of Victor’s resolute expression, the man can’t help but laugh.

"I could consider it, but you have to first learn how to not wear your tie crookedly.”

He looks down. Without realising it, his tie has become loose, and hangs on him crookedly. He hurries to the mirror to straighten it, but still looks in the direction of his father out of the corner of his eye.

The call which didn't get through in the bedroom earlier - Victor knows who it was made to. A proper calculation of the time differences , and the gentle tone used to talk about trivial matters - he’s already heard it for many years.

Certain things can’t be re-lived. But at least, they can continue through other means.

As a person who is about to become an adult, he believes he can do it.

Fun fact: Victor tied the Eldredge knot in his Deep Love Date T^T

-

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[everythingsinred]

Let's Talk About NatsuMikan: The Anime (pt. 1)

I could go on and on about these two and I think I will, just because I don’t often see people talk about the analysis behind them. The meta I have seen about them has included a perspective that equaled the anime and the manga and I don’t think that’s an accurate way of viewing their relationship.

The anime is a different species than the manga, something that frequently happens during the adaptation from page to screen. Since they’re so different, I’ll analyze them separately.

There's going to be many parts to this so I'll keep a table of contents right here so people can more easily navigate (though you can also read through the "let's talk about natsumikan: the anime" tag on my blog):

Anime Analysis

Part 1: Exposition & Episode 7

Part 2: Episodes 8, 9, 10, & 11

Part 3: Episodes 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, & 17

Part 4: Episodes 18 & 19

Part 5: Episodes 20, 21, & 22

Part 6: Episodes 23, 24, 25, & 26 & Conclusion

The anime makes changes, as anime adaptations often do. The most outstanding changes are appearance related, as Natsume now has brown eyes instead of red, in addition to other characters who have hue-shifted eyes and hair. But there are also story changes, and I’ll be focusing on the changes that occur, specifically in regards to Natsume and Mikan and their relationship.

For one, their relationship starts evolving much earlier in the anime. I think it’s pretty undeniable that in the anime, Natsume started liking Mikan at the end of the dodgeball game. That scene never happened in the manga, but in the anime, it’s a crucial step in making sure nothing seems too sudden or forced.

The anime is 26 episodes long. If Natsume only starts liking Mikan after she saves him during the Reo Arc, then we’re already halfway through the show when positive feelings between the two appear. On the other hand, the feelings develop more slowly in the manga because there’s more time to properly develop the relationship in a more drawn out way.

My analysis will start with the anime, because it’s shorter and easier to discuss.

Exposition

It’s impossible to say that the anime was completely loyal to the manga. It very frequently couldn’t be, because it needed to fill in time in episodes or give closure early before the manga even addressed it (Natsume’s backstory in the anime, for instance, is vaguely referred to and implies deviation from the manga).

The most obvious difference between the manga and the anime from the get-go is visual. Not only do they have differing art styles (I don’t dislike the anime style but Higuchi Tachibana’s art style is so distinct and unmistakable while the anime’s isn’t so unique), but the setting is also different.

While the manga started in the depth of winter, the anime starts off in summer/fall. It always struck me as odd that while the first page of the manga has Mikan running after Hotaru in full winter-wear, the anime starts off warm and idyllic. You could almost think of that as a general warning for the difference between the anime and the manga. After all, while the anime has a reputation for being a cutesy and upbeat story about friendship and magical powers, the manga is much darker and discusses many morbid and depressing themes that can and WILL fuck you up. Warm vs. cold seems like an accurate difference, though I don’t think that was intentional.

We see way more of the village life in the anime, including Mikan’s efforts to keep the school from closing. This is a welcome change because Mikan’s passion to keep the school open is nothing compared to her friendship with Hotaru, and even after the school is saved, she runs away to see her friend, even if it means she goes to another school. The manga doesn’t imply that Mikan knew already about the school’s fate, and since she is always so preoccupied with Hotaru anyway, we don’t really get the impression that she cares very much. To Anime!Mikan, Hotaru is more important than saving the school, something she was so passionate about she rallied to get signatures. It’s an extra scene to prove just how much Hotaru matters to Mikan, and to show even more how selfless Hotaru was to go to Alice Academy, since she knew how much the school mattered to Mikan.

“Sign my petition to get a Gakuen Alice anime reboot!!!”

My boy Natsume is only introduced properly in the second episode, when we actually see his face and he speaks. His appearance is different from the manga’s too. I’m not sure if this was to appeal to a younger audience or what, but Natsume’s eyes are changed to brown instead of their iconic red, something that was always my biggest peeve about the anime adaptation. His hair is also somewhat purplish instead of entirely grey/black and, although this does bother me a lot less than the eyes, I wonder why they made this change when other characters have black hair. It might have been to differentiate him from Hotaru, another main character with black hair, though I’ve never had issue in the manga telling them apart.

His first interaction with Mikan is a lot more pleasant in the anime than in the manga, although that’s not really saying anything. Mikan’s skirt simply falls off and Natsume draws attention to it, rather than the unpleasant events that took place in the manga. This different event makes it a lot easier to support a relationship between the two of them right off the bat. They are still antagonistic but it’s not as terrible as it is in the manga. This makes it easier to establish romantic feelings earlier on, and might have been changed in order to achieve just that, or possibly also to appeal to a younger audience. Maybe both? Who knows.

“You can’t sit with us!”

With Natsume presented the way he is in the anime, it’s easier to make the claim that he’s simply a good guy who acts the way he does to protect people. And it’s true! He is! But he is also so much more. In the manga, he’s a more complicated character. Although he is a good person, he still requires character development, which is something he does go through, and something I’ll talk about more in his meta analysis later.

Most of the events at the beginning of the anime parallel the events of the manga. Mikan goes to Alice Academy at the same time of year, Natsume shows up with an explosion, Mikan has to go through the Northern Woods, she discovers her powers in her fight with Natsume, etc. Some of the continuation from episode to episode is different than the transitions between chapter to chapter, there’s extra scenes inserted to fill up time, and some of the exposition seems strangely presented (in the anime, Mikan finds out more about the school when she finds Narumi and Iinchou waiting for her at a tea party, which is…. Super weird…), but all in all the information and events are mainly the same. The big differences start with the dodgeball episode.

“Look how happy she is. Makes me wanna barf.”

Episode 7 vs. Chapter 9

I love the dodgeball episode. I feel like for the most part, the anime does deviation from the manga pretty well. With the last arc as an exception, I generally enjoy their changes and additions to the plot. The anime has to be different, has to progress at a different pace, has to introduce topics at different times. They have an episode to fill, and less time to build relationships. Natsume and Mikan are both different characters in the anime but it’s very subtle and has to happen due to the fact that the anime is shorter and seems more designed for younger audiences, in addition to wrapping up before the manga could explore more of the story.

Anyway, let’s talk about the dodgeball episode. AGAIN THIS DOES NOT HAPPEN IN THE MANGA THE SAME WAY so when discussing NatsuMikan as a concept, the anime events cannot be treated the same as the manga events. A lot of people maybe forget that the manga is very different than the anime when it comes to this episode. I see the two media conflated in plenty of fanfics, where seventeen year old NatsuMikan reflect on the dodgeball game from their youth that changed everything, and I get it because the anime version of the dodgeball game is cute! It's shippy! It's fun! But it doesn't happen in the manga the same way.

There's a similar trope with the sakura tree, which I can only remember from the anime, and yet it's such a fundamental aspect of NM fanfic it might as well have played a vital role in both anime and manga. Nothing wrong with any of this, of course. I'm just making it clear that my analysis will cover the two media as separate for the sake of a cohesive essay. Separating them in fanfic is far less important.

This look could probably kill someone. I’m surprised Mikan is still alive, TBH.

The chapter’s focus is Mikan starting to feel more at home in Class B, making friends with her once-hostile classmates, but the episode is more preoccupied with Natsume and Mikan’s perspectives on each other. While in the manga, the game ends with a tie and Mikan accidentally hits Hotaru in the face with the ball, the anime draws out the game to fill an episode and to introduce an evolution in the way Natsume sees Mikan. The first part of the anime episode is Mikan introducing her friends to her new senpai, Tsubasa. After she invites her friends, we see Natsume glowering at her and promptly ditching the next class, saying to Ruka that he can’t stand being in the same class as her. This addition to the plot already foreshadows that their relationship will change in some way by the end of the episode.

Tsubasa tells a frustrated Mikan that if she wants Natsume to be less unpleasant, he’d need to release some of his toxic energy. Thus, the sporty Mikan introduces the concept of dodgeball to the unwelcoming class. When they finally agree, Natsume gives one condition: that they play with the notorious Alice Ball, which is powered by the thrower’s alice (a detail absent from the manga). This Alice Ball is particularly terrifying with the threat of Natsume’s dangerous fire alice. Mikan also needs to get more people on her team, another aspect absent from the manga. While in the manga, Mikan only had her few friends on her team (including a wandering Ruka) and this ended up playing to her advantage, the anime has a humorous plot of Mikan tracking players down for her team, including a fake mustache she makes with her pigtails (she’s so cute, I love her), paying Hotaru to be on her team, and blackmailing Ruka to participate. This was mainly to fill time, but it makes the dodgeball game more important as well.

In the manga, we don’t see how the game ends, just that the teams tied and that everyone in class is having fun and bonding. In the anime, more emphasis is put on the “Mikan vs. Natsume” aspect, so a tie like the manga’s would be anticlimactic. Thus, the anime concludes the dodgeball game with Mikan and Natsume being the only kids left on the court, and Natsume not using his alice when he throws the Alice Ball. Even Hotaru leaving the game is something she does out of boredom instead of injury, further separating the other characters from the plot. It’s about Natsume and Mikan, and everyone else is mostly a side character. (Though Ruka also plays a vital role to this episode AND chapter, and it’s at this point that I think he started developing real feelings for Mikan as well. So when it comes to the anime, he and Natsume fall for Mikan around the same time, but in the manga, Ruka likes her first and the “he liked her first” argument for Natsume vanishes, though he never had that “advantage” to begin with.)

“Thank you!”

Natsume wins (something that shocked me at twelve years old) and is ready to walk away with his handy “tch” and all but Mikan thanks him for not using his alice and he goes off on her, demanding to know why she’s still smiling despite her loss. She says she’s happy that he had fun and was involved with the rest of class for once, and that in a way that means she wins. For Anime!Natsumikan, this is it. This is the turning point. “I just wanted you to be happy and have fun,” is what Mikan might as well be saying. “Really, this was all for you!” It’s sweet and it’s thoughtful and I don’t think Natsume ever imagined he’d be on the receiving end of her kindness, especially after all their beef. Manga!Mikan would probably not say these things to him, even if she meant them, for the sole reason that Mikan is stubborn and holds onto her pride, especially when it comes to her early relationship with Natsume, but Anime!Mikan is much more forgiving and much more willing to extend an olive branch, like in the dance episode. In any case, Natsume starts falling right then, and it’s obvious too, because he is pissed, and even more angry because he’s not even mad at her. He’s angry with himself for his change of opinion. This is the girl he was fully content to hate forever and yet here he was, starting to like her. Not ideal.

This scene, something so crucial to the development of Anime!Natsumikan, is completely absent from the manga. In the manga, Natsume still dislikes her by the end of the game although he does have fun.

He's not angry, just disappointed. In himself.

I’m not going to say one is better when it comes to starting up NatsuMikan because they’re very different creatures and I actually thoroughly enjoy both.

Anyway, the NatsuMikan after episode 7 is almost the same as in the manga, but the events carry a different weight since we know Natsume likes Mikan now (even if he would never admit it).

Summary

I hope this first part was interesting, and that it introduced the idea of Anime!NatsuMikan as being a little different from the manga's version. Yes, it is more or less the same story, but with so many thematic and plot changes, they take a different form as well, in a perhaps more subtle way, kind of like a slightly canon divergent fanfic. Fanfic where Natsume starts liking Mikan a bit earlier on in the story.

Next Part ->

[supraveng]

Moving On (1/?)

Summary: you have to confront your past....what could go wrong

Characters: former Bucky Barnes x reader, current ?? x reader, Tony Stark, Natasha Romanoff, Sam Wilson, Wanda Maximoff, Steve Rogers

A/N:  here is the angsty piece, it will have at least 2 more chapters; does not follow any MCU story line; flashback in italics; attempting an MCU/SPN crossover; let me know if you want to be tagged in the next chapters

@mythandmagik​

Pulling up to the compound you weren’t sure what you expected, but surprisingly you were a lot calmer than you had anticipated.  You hadn’t seen most of the team in the 4 years since you moved to the SHIELD office in DC and you were excited but so much had changed.  You took a deep breath and grabbed your bags before exiting the car and heading inside.    

Tony greeted you immediately with a huge hug, it always amazed you how calming his hugs would make you, you pulled away after a quick kiss to the cheek and followed him through the compound.  “Your accommodations are right this way” he told you with a smirk.  “Wow, billionaire, genius and bellhop?  I wasn’t expecting that” you giggled.  

“I expect a good tip” Tony remarked as you followed him to the elevator.  “How about I pay you with kisses from your favorite niece?” you asked as you pressed a kiss to your daughters head “once she wakes up that is”  “That is perfect payment!  She looks even bigger than when i last saw her” he mentioned gazing at her as you all headed out of the elevator.  

“Morgan has been asking all week when you were arriving, I think there is a tea party scheduled for this afternoon”   

“Well, that works for me, I’m honestly surprised she’s still sleeping.  What time is the briefing?” you asked as you headed into the apartment followed by Kevin, carrying your bags, and Tony.   

“About 10 minutess, I can push it back if you need to settle in but I thought you might want to rip the band aid off, so to speak” he smirked.   “No, Kevin will be here with her, I can freshen up quick and be on our way” you smiled as you settled your daughter in the crib Tony had waiting for you.  “GIve me 5 minutes, and I’ll be ready” you headed into the bathroom to wash up quickly.  

Chatting with Tony on the way to the conference room felt like you had never left, you loved working with him and missed seeing him on a daily basis, but you had actually grown much closer to him since you had moved away.   You took a deep breath before entering the room and looked around to all the Avengers eagerly awaiting Tony’s arrival and the start of the meeting.  

“Ok, we can start, Special Agent Y/L/N, will be running the show” Tony announced as he made his way to the head of the table.  You smiled looking around the room, your eyes landing on his before you walked in and got to work.  Clearing your throat you began handing out the briefing you created “this is my surveillance notes for Mr. Dick Roman over the last 4 years, he has various aliases depending on what country he is in, but no matter where he is, he leaves a mess in his path when he leaves”  

“Hold up, you are not coming in here and talking about so whack job, being all Ms Business without even a proper hello”  You chuckled “I’m sorry Wilson, I wanted to get through the briefing so that we can properly form a plan before getting into personal greetings, but if you need a hug Sammy, I am more than willing to oblige” you stated as you walked towards him.  

“Damn right I do” Sam responded while pulling you into a bone crushing hug “and it’s Special Agent now, huh?  Running up the ranks in DC, I see” he winked at you as he placed a kiss on your forehead.  “What can I say?  I guess they like me” you shrugged as you stepped back.  

“And who wouldn’t” Steve quipped as he pulled you into a hug “we all miss you” he whispered in your ear before kissing your cheek.  “Thanks Steve” you turned toward Bucky who was awkwardly standing behind you.  

“Got a hug for me, doll?” he asked almost as if he was afraid of you.  “Of course, Bucky” you hugged him and as soon as he touched you, all the months of incredible memories between the two of your flashed in your mind as if they were just yesterday.  

You took a deep breath before releasing him “you look good, Buck, I like the short hair” you smiled before being pulled into a triple hug with Wanda and Nat. Laughing immediately when they started tickling you.   “Ok, please stop” you squeal.  “And this is why I was wanting to get through the documents first” you shook your head and got back to work.  

It was only about an hour later when you all decided to break for lunch and head to the common area.  You heard crying as soon as the elevator doors opened and knew the inevitable had happened.  Rushing into the room you find Kevin trying to rock Joy in his arms, trying to calm her down.   Reaching over you rubbed her back, when she looked up and whimpered “mama!’  

“I’m sorry, she woke up a few minutes ago and was a bit disoriented, we tried reading a book and singing but she wasn’t having any of it” Kevin told you with a sympathetic smile.  “It’s ok, I figured the new space might be a bit confusing.  You’re ok, right, Joy?” you asked as she climbed in your lap and wrapped her arms around your neck.  Mumbling something in your neck you couldn’t understand, but you heard her sniffles and the attempt to regulate her breathing.  

“It’s ok, mama’s here now” you hummed in her hair as you rubbed her back.  Looking up you came across a variety of faces, some confused, some shocked and some in awe of the sweet moment.   “Sweetie, do you want to meet mommy’s friends?” you ask hoping the change in subject will help calm her down. She huffed a no in your neck and tightened her grip.   

“Oh, but uncle Tony is here and he said that Morgan wants to have a tea party, but you can’t do that clinging to my neck” you told her softly.  She pulled away to look at you “unca-to-ee an mogan uh heew” you hummed confirmation before she slowly turned around to the room full of people watching your interaction. She gasped when she saw Tony “unca-to-ee! An Nat!” she shouted before climbing down and running to her two favorite Avengers.  

“Thank you Kevin. You can enjoy the rest of your day in the city, I got it from here”  you patted his leg and rose from the couch to follow Joy over to the group.  “You’re sure? I don’t mind sticking around” he responded only for you to quirk an eyebrow at him “of course you’re sure, I’m out, call me if you need me” he responded shaking his head at the fact that he questioned you.  

“So, everyone, this is Joy, Joy sweetie, these are mommy’s friends” you told her “can you say hi?”  “Hi fwens” she shouted as she waved at everyone.  “I hungee, can i hav a nack?” she asked as she looked up at Nat.  “Of course you can!  Let’s see what we can find” she told her before sweeping her up in her arms and heading to the kitchen, Wanda and Tony following behind.  Bucky, Sam and Steven were still in a bit of shock.  

“You have a daughter” Steve stated  “She’s adorable, Y/N, she looks just like you” Sam told you with a wink before heading to the kitchen.  “Thanks, she is a handful, but completely worth it” you responded with a soft smile.  

“How old is she?” Bucky asks, almost frightened of the answer.  “She just turned two last month” you smile remembering the fun little party you threw for her.  “So she’s not…” he started to say but trailed off, with a look that you didn’t recognize, not sure if it was relief or disappointment.  

“No, Bucky, she isn’t yours, I would have told you if that was a possibility” you respond softly.  “Sure” he states before looking at his feet.  “Yes, if i was pregnant with your child, I would have told you” you were defensive now, that he would think otherwise.  “I can’t do this right now, I thought we could work together and be civil but I guess I was wrong” you state as you head towards the kitchen hearing him mumble something under his breath you stop in your tracks.  Turning toward him you walk over slowly, as if you were afraid to spook an animal ‘what did you say?  I couldn’t hear you”  He took a deep breath before looking at you “I said go, that’s what you’re good at” And just like that you were transported back to the day when everything in your relationship crashed 

“Doll, we need to talk?” he stated as he sat down next to you on the couch.  “Okay, what’s going on Bucky?”  “I really care about you Y/N, but I don’t think this is working, I think it’s best if we go back to being just friends” he tells you, barely looking you in the eye.  “Oh…. and why the change?  I thought things were good” you respond trying to keep yourself from crying .  “Nothing changed, it’s just not working” he responds again remaining vague and just expecting you to agree.  

“Is there someone else?” you whisper knowing that something had to have prompted him to dump you after dating for the last 6 months, the best 6 months of your life, but apparently not his.  “No, there’s no one else, I wouldn’t do that to you” he tells you reaching for your hand to comfort you but you pull away.  

“Come on Bucky, we’ve been friends for years, I’ve seen the women you’ve been with, I’m not stupid” you spat at him, knowing there was always a prettier woman on his arm the moment he got bored with what you used to refer to as his flavor of the month.  “There is no one else, Y/N, I promise you” he’s nearly pleading with  you to believe him.   You shake your head as you stand up, the tears rolling down your cheeks now, but you don’t care.  

“That’s actually worse, you’d rather be alone than with me” you chuckle humorlessly as you head toward the elevator, you had to get out of here before breaking down completely.  “Don’t touch me!” you screech as he lays his hand on your shoulder.  

“Doll, I’m sorry, but I still want to be friends, we’ve been friends for years, I still care about you”  he tries to console you but at this point you feel so rejected that you want nothing but to get away from him.  

“I don’t care what you want, you certainly don’t care about me” you yell just as Sam, Steve and Nat come in to see what the yelling is about.  “What’s going on?” Steven asked, looking concerned.  

"Nothing important, just your friend getting rid of his latest fling" you bitterly spit out as you glare at Bucky. "Have a nice life Barnes" then you are stepping into the elevator just as Natasha comes in before the doors close.  You start sobbing and she pulls you into a hug.

"What the hell man?" Sam asks as Bucky drops his head and leaves the room.

"You are the one that ended us, don't make me be the bad guy for taking a job out of town to try and get over you" you tell him barely above a whisper.  Bucky looks at you with regret "I messed up, but I find out from Nat that you aren't even in the state any more. I didn't get a chance to fix things, to fix us" he tells you reaching out for you.  

You just shake your head "Fix us? When were you planning on doing that?  Between which supermodel did you even remember my name?" you spat as his eyes widened.  "Not even a week after you were done with me did I have to see you with another one of your flings, so don’t stand there and pretend like you wanted to fix anything.  You got bored, like you always do, and you tossed me aside.”  

“That’s what you think?  I got bored and moved on?” he questioned looking hurt.  “What else am I supposed to think, Bucky?  You gave me no explanation, nothing.  You were just done with me.  So, yes, I took a job at the SHIELD office in DC so that i didn’t have to watch the man I loved parade around all the beautiful women who were just waiting in line for their turn” you tell him as you think back on making the decision to leave all of your friends and colleagues in NY.  

“Loved? As in past tense?”  he questioned.  

“Yes, honestly Bucky, we knew each other for so long that when we started dating, I thought you were it for me.  You knew all my baggage and dirty secrets and you still wanted to be with me, that had to mean something, right?  But it wasn’t meant to be”  you whisper and feel the tears pricking the back of your eyes.  

“We still could, we could start over, I owe you an explanation, but it’s not too late” he tells you, pleading for you to give him a second chance.  

To say you were shocked by his statement would be an understatement, you hadn’t spoken in 4 years and now he wants a second chance but before you can respond, Joy comes running back in the room. “Mama, com on, is yunch time!” she says as she grabs your hand and pulls you toward the kitchen.  

Lunch was more relaxing than you expected, especially after the short conversation you had with Bucky.  This isn’t what you expected today, not that you really knew what to expect but him asking for a second chance after all this time, really surprised you.  By the time lunch was over, Joy had more energy than normal, she was quickly acclimating to her new surroundings and loving all the extra attention.  

Walking over to Bucky after cleaning up your plate “Look, we should talk, but this mission takes priority.  When Roman is under lock and key, you and I can sit down and try to restore our friendship, but until then, we need to remain professional and leave our personal lives out of this.”  Bucky only nodded in return as he watched you pick up your daughter and head out of the room.  

PART 2

[jadoue1999]

The X-Men and the member they lost - Chapter 7

Summary:  The X-Men are finally back home, but there is much to talk about and a long road to go before everything goes back to normal. If they ever do.

Previous parts: Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3, Chapter 4, Chapter 5, Chapter 6, Chapter 7, Chapter 8, 

Chapter 7: Grief and bonding

The X-men stared at the speedster in stunned silence as he stopped in front of them. Wanda was avoiding their gaze, obviously ashamed. She spoke with Charles, the telepath trying to see if she would be a good fit at the school.

“I want you to understand, Ms. Maximoff, that the last time we spoke you seemed very keen on keeping your world. While I understand why you did it, I expect you to find a better way to cope than… this.” He said, motioning to the town around them.

The woman nodded. “Yes, you’re right. It never should have come to this.” She quickly glanced at Peter with glassy eyes, “for what it’s worth, I never meant to bring him here. I was just so sad that my boys would never meet their uncle… I suppose my powers acted without me realizing.”

The wheelchair bound man slowly nodded his head in understatement before agreeing that it was better that she’d go with them. Erik had to agree. He might not have been thrilled about having his son’s captor living with them, but with this world and the lack of mutants; it was certain her future would be bleak. Government officials were already coming in, just waiting for an opening to take the woman away. Being stuck in isolation, unable to use their powers other than the occasional scientists’ visits was something he wished on no one. Plus, he could see how much Peter wanted her by his side. He’d tolerate her presence, for his son.

They marched through the portal, this time it was a lot faster and easier on the mind. Erik felt slightly nauseous, but it went away quickly. He noticed with a smirk how amazed Charles had been at the ease Wanda created an interdimensional portal. The school was overjoyed at seeing everyone back in one piece. The students flocked Peter with greetings and questions. Though it was the professor who took most of the questions. The speedster was apparently still a little confused about what had happened. The students were all wondering who Wanda was. The group settled on saying that she was a powerful mutant who had accidentally lost her way. Erik could see that the professor didn’t want to scare anyone.

Jean, Scott and Ororo suddenly ran to Peter and squeezed him in their arms. They were all laughing in relief, telling him how glad they were to have him back. Peter was... uncharacteristically quiet. He who was always babbling could barely keep up with all the attention. Erik could see him starting to fidget and anxiously looking around. Finally, the crowd of people seemed to be satisfied with the few answers they got and started to leave the group alone. Charles took the other members of the X-men with him, probably to fill them in on what had happened. Wanda stayed by herself, looking disoriented as ever. Hank offered to give her a tour, which she accepted after sharing an anxious glance with Peter. Soon enough, they were gone, leaving father and son together. The metal bender walked over and gently put a hand on his shoulder. He could see how nervous he was. “Hey, are you okay?” The speedster looked at him and nodded, “oh, yeah... just tired. It’s been a while.” Right. He had been in a small town living with four other people for who knows how long. Of course, coming back to a manor full of overexcited children would be overwhelming. “How long was it? For you?” He seemed lost in thoughts for a few seconds before he shook his head. “I’m not exactly sure. I’d say a few days, but it felt longer than that.”

They walked together to an empty room, where they could talk in peace. The sun was just setting, bathing the room in a soft glow. They sat opposite of one another, neither of them talking for nearly a minute.

“So… you’re my dad,” finally spoke up Peter. He chuckled to himself, “you know, I imagined this conversation a thousand time and yet I have no idea what to say right now.”

“Well, I know,” he smiled at his son, “thank you for releasing me from the Pentagon.”

Peter seemed a bit flustered at the sudden recognition, but a wide grin soon adorned his face. “Ah, it was nothing. Ask Charles or Hank, I literally did it for fun.”

Erik smirked in amusement; the speedster really was something. He wasn’t sure what he could tell him. It was no doubt his mother told him about their lineage, so she probably told him how they met. He probably knew most of his life story whereas he didn’t know much about him.

“Tell me about you?” he asked him. “I’ve missed so much of your life; I’d like to know you properly.”

Peter hummed, probably trying to decide what to say. “Uh… What do you know? Just so I have a starting point.”

“Well, thanks to Charles, I know that your real name is Pietro, and that you had a twin, but I don’t know much else.” He knew, of course about the Pentagon break and about En Sabah Nur, but he had left the mansion too quickly to learn anything else about him.

The speedster seemed taken aback by the mention of his true name, but quickly masked his surprise with an awkward grin. “Right… well first off, I don’t really use Pietro. It’s, uh, it’s what Wendy used to call me. She never really accepted to call me Peter other than in public and she’s, uh, she’s been gone for awhile, and I try to not think about it so much. So, I hope you don’t get too offended. I mean, that’s why I never mentioned it to anyone else before, cause I prefer Peter anyway; I’m trying to keep that part of my past in the past and-“

“It’s alright,” said Erik, interrupting his rambling. “Don’t worry about it, I’ll use Peter.”

That seemed to satisfy the young man, who visibly relaxed in his chair before changing the subject. “Thanks. Anyway, I didn’t really do much, just a year ago I still lived in my mother’s basement and stole anything I wanted.” He looked around him before grinning. “You know, the explosion that destroyed the mansion?” Erik nodded, him and Jean had taken quite a few days the rebuild the whole thing. They had both needed a few days of recovery after using their powers for such an extensive and detailed task. “Well, I’m the one that saved everyone from the explosion. They were all saved without any whiplash.“ His face suddenly darkened, “except for Scott’s brother. He was already vaporized by the time I got inside.”

The speedster continued his rambling for a few minutes, Erik nodding along and trying to keep up. He was glad that Peter was finally back to himself. The conversation turned to what had happened in Westview and he simply had to ask.

“Charles told me your mutation gave you protection against telepath.”

“Sure does!” he answered, knocking on his head twice with a smug grin. “No telepath goin’ in there any time soon. My thoughts are sealed.”

He might not have known much about his son, but he was well aware that he was trying to deflect the subject. “Yes… well I wanted to ask because we never got a real explanation. How did you end up with the necklace? How did it even work on you?”

Peter’s fingers unconsciously brushed against his neck as his eyes became distant. “Agnes… she, uh, she had this freaky book that told her how to deal with people like me. She said there had to be a physical object with the spell, so it could keep up with me.”

Erik hummed as he put his hands under his chin, it was a start, but there had to be more. “She didn’t do anything else?”

“Well, the spell was painful. It’s hard to explain, but I was trapped in my worst memories until it found an opening and it could take control of me. Definitely not something I’d recommend.”

Peter kept fidgeting as he recalled the events, so Erik decided to stop asking about it. Perhaps a happier subject would help. “Tell me about the twins, they seemed nice.”

A smile grew on Peter’s lips and Erik knew that he had hit the right spot. The speedster started talking about how amazing they were and how much fun they’d had. He gleamed as he recalled helping the younger speedster with video games and how he had teased them about stealing all their candies. And while he now felt bad about it, the teamwork they had done to deal with Kurt and Raven was something he felt particularly proud about; going as far as to refer to them as ‘mini X-Men in training’. That made them both smiles.

They talked for a very long time; the clock was nearing midnight. Erik could see his son starting to doze off and he let him sleep while he went to grab a book. He hadn’t been in Wanda’s world for long and he himself felt drained, he couldn’t imagine how tired his son must have been. He had been reading for about twenty minutes when a sudden gush of air made him look up to the now empty chair. He heard movements in the kitchen and decided to join him on his midnight snack. Peter was reaching into multiple cupboards, fixing himself what looked to be sugary cereals and various other things. With the quantity of food, he was taking out, he must have been very hungry.

“Are you alright?” Erik asked as the silver blur kept going around the kitchen.

“Sure am!” he answered, not looking at him. “Just needed a quick meal, I did that all the time when I was with Wanda.” He opened the doors to where the various dishes were and turned his head slightly to the side. “Now boys, what I’m about to show you is the ultimate combo-“ The speedster stopped himself before he could finish his sentence. He slowly turned to Erik with pained eyes and looked around.

“Peter?”

His son seemed like a shell of himself as he ever so slowly put down what he was holding. His eyes scanned the counter that held too much food, even for him, before he looked back at the man with teary eyes. “I, uh, I have to go.”

Before he could protest, Erik was alone in the kitchen. The food was back to where it had been, but the speedster hadn’t touched the dishes he had just taken out. The metal bender sighed as he realized his son had taken out 3 bowls. There would certainly be a long road ahead before Peter could heal from his grief.

***

Peter was glad to be back, he truly was. 

He got his team back, his mind back and his father knew about him and accepted him even with his rotten luck concerning family. Nothing had felt better than having his friends jumping on him and telling him how glad they were to have him back between two laughs. Then the overdue discussion he had with his dad had been great. He really couldn’t ask for a better ending. However, his life in Westview had been so unique, so unlike anything he’d ever known before. There wasn’t the fear of being discovered because Wanda had made sure that they could use their powers without people staring. And there was no constant threat, save from Agnes, but they didn’t know at the time. Most of all, he felt complete. The overwhelming grief he had felt ever since Wendy had died wasn’t present because his twin was with him. She had never left in the first place. And he not only had his sister with him, but she was also married. Sure, her choice of husband was strange but who was he to judge? Vision had been pleasant company, even though they hadn’t talked much.

Then... then there were the boys. He had never thought himself as parental figure material. Hell, he was older than most student, but could still fit in better than most. He wasn’t exactly the most mature person. Still, he never thought he’d be a good role model. Then, he got into Wanda’s freaky tv show where he was the cool uncle that messed around with his nephews. He could play with them and do all the mischief his heart desired. He loved them and they loved him. Nothing felt as freeing as running through the crowd at Halloween, stealing candies, smashing pumpkins, and covering everyone in silly string. Then, the twins developed powers. The joy he felt when he saw Tommy suddenly breaking into superspeed mode made every happy moment in his life seem bleak. 

He and Wendy had grown up thinking they were unique, anomalies even. Then, she had died, and Peter thought he was alone. Until Charles, Hank and the claw guy had found him and asked him break out his father. He was happy to find that he wasn’t the only one with powers, he simply wished Wendy could have known as well. Then he moved to the mansion, where there were so many mutants. He felt at home. Yet, he never really was able to make connections with anyone, their world was simply too slow for him. But that wasn’t the case with Tommy. The twin was able to keep up with him and see the world at his pace. When they played games, he didn’t have to go agonizingly slow to give him time to react. When they wanted to go somewhere, they just went there while having a conversation, the child wasn’t frozen or in need to be moved. He just kept up with him. Peter, or Pietro as he had called himself, had loved taking out the soldiers with him, telling him what to do and working with Tommy like he had never done before. Him, Wanda, Vision, and the twins. They had been an unstoppable team and he truly believed that they would be together forever. Until they weren’t. He still remembered the panic he felt when the boys had started to fall apart as Wanda was freeing everyone. His mind had been jumping between his chill persona and the real him breaking through. It wasn’t fun.

He had meant to have a better talk with Wanda, but life at the mansion was always busy. Well, that and the fact that they didn’t really speak when they found themselves together. They felt contempt just sitting in silence and watching a movie together. It was clear neither of them was ready to speak about what they had lost. There was the occasional reference to something Vision or the twins would have liked, but even that was too much sometimes. Instead, they got to know each other. Wanda had been shocked when he told her that his real name was Pietro, and he could just tell that she saw her true brother for a second. One big difference between him and Wanda was that he had lost Wendy at 16, while she had lost her Pietro at 26. Peter hadn’t exactly dealt with her death, but he had learned to cope with the pain. Wanda only had a few years, and the wound was still pretty fresh.

One night a few weeks after they came back, Wanda had suddenly stopped the movie and turned to him. “What did Agatha do to you? When you went for repairs?”

Peter was confused for a second before concluding that the witch had probably used a fake name when she came in the town. “Not much to be honest. She did some freaky magic to suspend me in the air and basically blackmailed me.” He looked at her with a frown. “But you knew that. What did she to do you to make you so worried about me?”

The redhead squeezed the hot cocoa mug she was holding. “She made me revisit everything that made me create Westview. My parent’s death, my brother’s death, Hydra’s experimentation, and my encounter with Vision’s body. And we revisited the night I woke you up and…” She didn’t complete her sentence. Wanda was staring off in the distance as she recalled the intervention. “She threatened to hurt you and the boys if I didn’t cooperate. I also feared she might have done a similar thing to you.”

Peter thought back at the dreaded moment the witch had threatened his nephews and the confusion he felt when she spoke about why she menaced them and not him. “Nah, apparently your magic protected me, so she couldn’t really do anything. The rugrats were the real targets.”

Wanda pressed her lips together in a sad smile and nodded. They both stayed silent for a few seconds before she broke the silence. “I miss them.” Peter turned to the redhead; her eyes were fixed to the liquid in her mug. “Vision and the boys, I still have days where I think they’ll just… be there, you know? I imagine that Tommy and Billy are with you and Vision is about to cross the door and wish me a good morning.”

The speedster agreed with her statement, it was hard to keep going in a school full of mutant children without his mind trying to catch a glimpse of his nephews that never really existed in the first place. 

“You know,” he started with a smile. “I had never met another person with superspeed before Tommy. Felt nice to not be alone, even for a moment.” His grin faded as he stared at his hands, a burning question on his lips. “If you could, would you go back to Westview?”

She closed her eyes in concentration, momentarily lost in thoughts. She shook her head as she turned to him. “In retrospect, no.” she sighed, “but if I could see them again, without hurting anyone, I would.”

Peter hummed at her answer, he could see the logic in her thinking, of course, but he wasn’t sure he could resist the temptation. Even if it hurt people. Good thing he wasn’t the one that got reality bending powers. She continued the movie once more and they absently watched as they thoughts were consumed by memories of their long gone family.

***

Notes: Thanks for reading!

Next chapter: One of Wanda’s spell takes an unexpected turn!

[ka-za-ri]

Personal Assistant Pt. 2

Part 1: Here Part 3: here Part 4: here Part 5: here Part 6: here Part 7: Here Crossposted to Ao3: here

Hi. Hello. Thank you for reading the first chapter and for all the new follows. I’m still new to this whole fandom so excuse me if I overstep any boundaries. Unbeta’d because we die like heroes here. Please leave a comment or something idk, validate me?

Pairing: Lucifer x Reader Wordcount: 5,900 ish Genre: Smut Tags: Edging, Oral Sex, Orgasm denial, masturbation, sex toys, under-desk blowjob, sexual tension, sex on a desk, overstimulation

Probation Period

Lucifer wasn’t joking when he said you would be occupied with a lot of work. The first two weeks at the office were dedicated to acquainting yourself to the systems you would be using on a daily basis, learning the location of all the supplies as well as memorizing  what floors all the departments were. It was a proper nine-to-five with all the bells and whistles of benefits, overtime pay and paid-time-off as long as it was approved. Being so close to the head of the company, you came to realize just how much work actually needed to be done. Lucifer’s schedule was always full and you were constantly trying to squeeze in just one more meeting for him. It almost made the interview you went to feel like a feverish dream. 

Every now and then, you would steal a glance over to your boss after he finished speaking with another department head or analyst. The two of you would lock gazes and for a moment there would be a heat that welled up between your legs reminding you that everything he promised was real. 

You thought you were prepared for the job with your skill set, figuring fluency with an office suite was the bare minimum. However, you never thought you’d be learning six other proprietary systems while also having to answer a phone that never stopped ringing. 

Humans didn’t know many things; but, they could always be easily taught anything in the world with some proper training.

For someone who had lived hundreds of years, ensuring that you were well trained to actually handle the duties of his office before starting proper private lessons was a small price to pay. It barely passed in his mind that you could be needy and wanting more of what he had offered the night you signed your contract with him. He often looked fondly over the document after hours when even you had gone home, smirking in pride when he knew you hadn’t read everything thoroughly. No one ever did. 

You were beginning to think that the promise of “after hour activities” had all been made up and fell into a rhythm at work, quickly becoming efficient at weeding out the unnecessary meetings and phone calls by settling the issues at hand with a well worded email.Things were settling and finally you were in a lull where you could comfortably work and not feel like you were drowning in information. Still, even if you were a month and a half into your new position, the last thing he told you the night of the interview rang in your head. 

“Wear the same lipstick, will you? I’d love to see what that color looks like smeared all over my cock.” 

Ever since that night, you came into work with the same shade of red on your lips, hoping it would be the day he would get to see what the image of your lipstick all over his hard length looked like. It became so ingrained in your routine, you had even bought a few more tubes of the same color, just in case the current one you had ran out. 

Yet, nothing. No indications whatsoever from Lucifer that he took notice how obedient you were of his request. No outward signs that he was even remotely as affected as he was on the night of the interview. Soon enough, you had chalked it up to some persuasive tactics he used to get you to work for him. 

So, it was much to your surprise when you walked into the office in the beginning of your second month and found a small box sitting at your desk. Once your things were put away, curiosity got the better of you and you opened the non-descript box. The moment your eyes laid on the phallic object inside, you gasped and dropped it back onto your desk. 

“Is it not to your liking?” Lucifer’s low, silky voice came from behind you. He had somehow soundlessly made his way to your desk, watching your every move as you unwrapped his gift to you. 

“I uh… Uhm…” 

“A present… for making it through your first month here.” He explained, coaxing you out of your chair and bending you over your desk. Your body was as pliable and malleable as he remembered it to be. 

“I… Thank you… Lucifer…” you breathed, swallowing hard as you eyed the object nestled in the box. 

“Let me help you into it.” He offered, taking it into his hand. He moved one of your legs to be propped up on the top of your desk, the AC hitting your heat in a way it hadn’t in what felt like ages. Nearly nothing had been done and a fog of desire had already settled upon your brain. 

Now that he had an excellent view of your panties, he rubbed the stout, girthy toy up and down your slit, watching as your body twitched in reaction. Pushing your panties to the side, he pressed the tip of the toy into your pussy only to have a strangled gasp come from you as you weren’t wet enough to accept it yet. 

“I should have expected as much…” He murmured to himself. How foolish of him to forget that even if you had been in his care for the last month, your true training was starting today. Of course he couldn’t expect you to be as wet as he wanted as soon as you walked in. “Stay still.” He commanded and the warmth of his body left your side. 

Making his way to his desk, he unlocked a drawer and took out a bottle of lube. Generously coating the toy while he walked back to you, you saw the same glittering darkness in his eyes that made your heart race from the interview. Fearful that you had disappointed him, you started babbling apologies and begged for his forgiveness, promising to do better. He hushed you with a firm glare before going back to what he was doing. “The only thing you need to apologize for, is if you’re unable to be wet enough to take this first thing in the morning by next week.” he said coolly. 

The slick toy now much easier to slide into you was met with only the resistance of your tight pussy as he pushed it into you. “Starting today, you’ll wear this during your working hours.” He readjusted your panties once the vaginal plug was snuggly in you, the bottom of it just peeking out between your lips before your underwear covered them once again. Satisfied, he helped your leg down from the desk and put the bottle of lube into one of your drawers. “Don’t let it fall out now.” He said with a self satisfied smirk, turning heel and heading back to his desk as if nothing ever happened. 

The plug inside of you stretched you out and filled you deliciously so. However it wasn’t nearly large or long enough to properly satisfy you. Sitting down at your chair to start your own duties for the day, it pressed further into you, stimulating you and made it hard to concentrate on your tasks at hand. As hard as focusing was, the fear of disappointing Lucifer looming over you was even more oppressive. Any moment your mind wandered to the stretch your pussy was feeling, you forcibly had to look at something else or distract yourself with phone calls in order to get through the day. 

No matter how many distracting tasks you came up with, it did nothing to quell your arousal. The way the toy pressed at your entrance and teased all the spots inside of you that needed attention had your nerves on fire. You weren’t sure how you were going to survive if you needed to wear it on the regular. By the time your shift ended, there was a significant wet spot on your chair and on the back of your skirt. You were eternally lucky that there hadn’t been any physical meetings set up for the day. Though, you weren’t quite sure if it was actually luck or if Lucifer had orchestrated the day to work out like that for you. 

Regardless,cleaning up the mess you became in the bathroom was an adventure. The toy easily slid out of you and you groaned from both relief and desire. Having it inside of you all day only made you want something more. More being specifically Lucifer’s cock dragging itself in and out of your walls. As you washed the toy and stowed it away in its designated drawer, your mind meandered, wondering if today would be the day that you would see your lipstick on his dick. 

It was very much to your dismay though, when you came out of the bathroom, Lucifer had already left for the day and you were alone with your thoughts and a throbbing, aching pussy. 

~~

The moment you got home, you frantically searched under your bed for the box that held your own small collection of toys and grabbed the first one that you knew could satisfy you in the way you had been craving all day. Thrusting it into your sopping core, you moaned wantonly, throwing your head back and flopping onto your bed, not caring to take off any more clothes than absolutely necessary. 

The toy worked in and out of you and you bucked against it. Almost forgetting that it could vibrate, you turned it on and let it do its work, making you moan as you shoved its full length into you. If only it was Lucifer and not a piece of silicone. If only he had bent you over the desk after work and filled you. Your fingers rubbed at your clit and you angled the toy to brush against your g-spot, gasping and writing in pleasure as your vision filled with stars. You panted heavily, the pressure of an orgasm building quickly in your abdomen and you couldn’t wait for the release it would give you. It only took a few more hard thrusts of the toy on its highest setting before you came undone, crying out gratefully and spasming around it, your mind reeling in the euphoria of getting off after hours of being teased by a damn toy. 

But it wasn’t enough. It wasn’t him. And it somehow felt dirty that you had cum without his permission, without his heated gaze on your body. A feeling of shame and guilt washed over your body while you powered the toy off, gasping for air after the whirlwind fucking you had given yourself. You whined, pulling it out of you rolled over, the initial high had been great but it left you feeling dissatisfied for some reason. 

It was as if your pleasure belonged to Lucifer. No matter what you did to yourself, it wouldn’t be nearly the same as what he could give you. Your pussy ached for more stimulation just thinking about him, even if you had just cum. Yet, you couldn’t bring yourself to relieve yourself unless it was at his behest. Sighing heavily, you dragged your limp body to the shower to get rid of the mess between your legs and to prepare for another day of long torment without relief in sight. 

~~

It took less than a week to train yourself to be wet enough to slide the vaginal plug into you without the aid of lube. First thing in the morning, Lucifer got a front row show of you parting your legs, taking the toy out of the drawer and putting it in you. You adapted quickly, kicking your skirt up before you sat down so that your bare ass came in contact with the chair and you would have less to clean up. Lucifer was kind enough to have the foresight to supply you with a leather chair to ensure your essence could be easily wiped up at the end of your shif. Ever since the first night, the desire to be fucked only grew in you. You hadn’t touched yourself since then, hoping, praying that he would show you mercy and relieve you in a way only he could. 

Ah, but Lucifer was cruel and he took his training very seriously. As soon as he knew you had grown accustomed to the first toy he introduced, he was ready to push your limits again as yet another gift graced your desk a week later. The butt plug, adorned with a glittering red jewel made you swallow hard. You hadn’t ever explored using your other hole, but Lucifer was at least gentle as he trained your asshole open that morning. 

Plenty of lube dribbled down your backside as he slowly worked the hard metal plug, pressing it against your tight ass and easing it into you, cooing and praising you the whole time. He pet your hair as you gasped from being stretched to your limit, he stroked your face as the plug finally slid into you and your whole body was alight with a flurry of sensations. “Good girl…” he praised softly, planting a kiss on your cheek before going back to work. As soon as you sat down, you knew you had a long day ahead of you as the duality of having both holes filled cast a fog over your mind.

Part of his responsibility as a boss to you was to make sure you were cared for, looked after and treasured even if his normal disposition was rather chilly. He was a stern businessman after all, but he did dote on you in some ways. The main way being that he made sure to be there every morning to fit the anal plug into you while you slid the other one into your waiting pussy. Every step of your training was meticulously overseen by him and he just loved the way your body accepted everything he tried as long as he was patient enough. 

Your workload never seemed to lessen, even with the weight of the plugs inside of you every day. The corporate world didn’t stop for anyone and you had to adapt even further to hide your sexual frustration from the guests that frequented the office during his meetings. Guiding them to the little alcove in the corner of the office lined with couches that served as a miniature ‘waiting room’ was the hardest part. Every step you took sent jolts of pleasure down your legs and you struggled to keep your pace even while maintaining perfect posture. Your muscles clenched and strained to ensure nothing fell out of you. Even if the journey was a short one, it felt like it lasted for miles with how much effort it took to look professional. You always ended your introductions with a smile, letting your esteemed guests know that Lucifer would be ready to see them shortly before having to make the long, arduous journey back to your desk. 

Lucifer took pride in the company he built and the people he trained. You, most of all, were so susceptible to all his lessons and adapted quickly. It only felt natural for him to spend on gifts for you, giving you a plethora of options to choose from on how to stuff your pussy for your day. Every few days, it seemed like there was a new box on your desk. Whether it was deliciously textured balls that rubbed against each other and stretched you in a way that made you see stars, or smooth orbs with weights in them, making you clench anytime they shifted inside of you, they all had one thing in common: they all left you wanting more. None of them ever seemed to stretch you far enough or deep enough to satisfy that itch and craving you had for Lucifer’s cock and you were driven nearly mad at that fact. 

He could just how frustrated you were as you cleaned up after yourself and bent over your desk, waiting for him remove the anal plug from your ass. Your essence flowed freely down your thigh at the end of the day and he was satisfied; especially when you let out that precious breathy moan of yours whenever the plug left you empty. You would always look back at him, pleading with your eyes for him to take it further and fill you, but it was business as usual for him. He’d tell you to go home and you would be left on the edge, unable to cum unless he gave you explicit permission to do so. 

~~  

The end of your second month working at Akuzon as Lucifer’s personal assistant drew to a close and by the third month you were there, no matter what task you were doing, your mind reeled with fantasized images of how you wanted Lucifer to take you and make you scream. It invaded every fiber of your being. It was so endlessly frustrating to see your boss completely straight laced and nonplussed at your predicament. He could tell you were close to your breaking point, almost a month of teasing and yet no release in sight; it would soon come time for him to give you what you truly craved. 

“Ah… This is a problem, can you come here and help?” He called you over to his desk and pointed at the space underneath. “I dropped the whole box of paperclips and I really don’t have time to pick them up before my next meeting. Be a dear, and help?” 

“Yes, of course, Lucifer.” you obliged, thinking nothing of it and scrambled on your hands and knees to pick up what seemed to be hundreds of paperclips on the ground. Before you were even a quarter of the way through, you heard the elevator in the distance ding, signalling the arrival of your next guest. Scrambling to get up and greet them, you only found yourself blocked off by Lucifer sitting down, scooting his chair right up to you and blocking your escape. 

“Don’t make a sound now.” He said quietly, looking down at you with an expectant expression on his face. “This guest is of the highest esteem and I would like to make sure this acquisition goes smoothly.” 

“Y-yes, Lucifer.” You mumbled, shifting enough so that you were settled somewhat comfortably between his legs and staring right at his thighs. 

“My apologies for not having my assistant greet you.” Lucifer said as his guest came in. “She’s on an errand and couldn’t make it back in time. Please, take a seat.” He stood up, gesturing to the chair on the other side of the desk and got right to work, discussing the terms of his next acquisition and his expectations once the companies merged. The talk was mundane and there was a fair amount of back and forth as schematics were discussed. 

He kept one hand on his thigh, gently stroking his crotch, and you watched wide eyed, barely daring to breathe as he got hard right in front of his client. His voice betrayed nothing, staying smooth and low while he discussed business matters. You could barely think straight as his finger beckoned you closer to his clothed crotch. His musky scent mixing with the smell of his cologne and newly dry cleaned clothes made you dizzy. As his cock started to strain and press against his pants, you carefully leaned forward, nuzzling his crotch and basking in his closeness. 

He seemed to enjoy this little development. His hand wandered over to your hair, pulling you closer and encouraging you. The thrill of possibly being caught sparked an arousal in you that you hadn’t expected. The conversation above you melted away as you focused on the hardening length pressed up against your cheek and breathing in his scent, getting intoxicated by just his proximity. His hand gently patted your hair as you nuzzled him to full mast under his clothes. You felt your arousal rise along with his cock, your slick essence soaking through your panties. Yet you didn’t dare touch yourself or make a noise. 

“Ah, how foolish of me. I forgot the final paperwork in my car. Please, excuse me for a moment while I retrieve it.” The client said as they drew close to closing the deal. “I’ll be right back.” 

“Of course, please take your time.” Lucifer said. You couldn’t see it, but you could almost feel the self satisfied smirk that was undoubtedly on his face once the guest left to retrieve the documents. 

As soon as the elevator dinged and they were alone, his grip in your hair tightened. He slid back just enough to see your face peeking out from between his thighs. “Don’t ruin this for me.” he warned, unzipping his pants and pulling out his cock. You started salivating as you saw his length unfurl before you, hard and throbbing, a drop of precum dribbling from the tip and your tongue darted out to catch it and taste him. He smirked, loving how obedient  you were without him asking you to be. “Don’t mess up my suit. Understand?” 

“Yes… Sir.” 

The dark glitter of lust shone in his eyes for a brief moment as you addressed him properly. He settled himself back into place and you were once again alone under the desk; but this time with a very important task at hand. It was a long ride up the elevator from the ground floor to the top, which gave you ample time to suck him off as loudly and as lewdly as you wanted. His cock filled your mouth hot and heavy, the salt from his precum and his scent cast a haze over you as you put as much of him in your mouth as you could. Your hand fisting the rest of what you couldn’t handle all at once. 

His hand in your hair set the pace, making your head bob as you slurped and sucked. Only once did you hear a satisfied groan come from him. But, that was enough to send your hormones into overdrive and you redoubled your efforts into pleasuring him. Your knees ached and your whole body felt too hot to be cramped under his desk like this; but the taste and feel of his cock in your mouth was worth it. It was truly too soon when you heard the tell tale ding of the elevator in the distance, signalling the return of your guest that you had to abruptly stop being loud. 

“I didn’t take too long, now did I?” 

“No, not at all. I was just reviewing everything to make sure everything is crossed and dotted properly.” Lucifer replied calmly, but you could hear a slight strain in his tone. His hand pushed your mouth further down his length until he hit the back of your throat. You fought back a startled squeal and resisted the urge to gag, relaxing your body and your reflexes to accept him as he saw fit. Satisfied, he removed his hand to go over a few more things on the paperwork and you took the prerogative to keep taking him until every inch of him was down your throat. You had to take slow breaths to keep yourself from passing out, his girthy cock blocking much of your airway. 

You could feel his thighs tense as he was balls deep down your throat. As soon as he was able to, his hand returned to your hair and set a languid pace, using your mouth and throat as a fuck toy while he hashed out important business details. Drool pooled at the base of his cock as you let him use you. The worry of ruining his suit caused your whole body to tense in anxiety and you prayed that everything would drip onto the chair below him and not on the expensive tweed of his suit. 

“Yes, I think all of that checks out. Just our signatures left.” Lucifer’s voice floated into your consciousness, the first clear sign that it was all going to be over soon. He didn’t know just how wet you were from sucking him off under his desk. Just rubbing your thighs together, you knew there was a slick mess for you to deal with later on your own. 

Just a little bit more… You told yourself, holding your desire and your breath as you heard the tell tale scratching above you of papers being signed. From there, it was only a few more congratulatory remarks and the guest was on his way out. As soon as he leaves I’m going to suck his soul out from his dick. You determined, fantasizing about how his hot load would taste going down your throat. 

“Yes, that’s the last of everything. I’ll have the receptionist see you out.” Lucifer shuffled the documents on his desk and slid them into a drawer. 

“Of course. I look forward to future business ventures with you.” 

“And I as well. Thank you for coming.” 

Something happened then that you didn’t think could ever happen. You stifled a whimper against his cock buried in your face, but it was impossible to not make a sound. Your whole body shivered when he said that word. The way it lilted and the meaning it held to you had involuntarily made you orgasm. All the sexual tension you had been asked to hold for the past month came crashing around you and you were a shaking wreck, clenching around the small toys inside of you. The lack of air making the euphoria of your climax all the more surreal. 

“Did you hear something?” 

“Must have been the air conditioning settling.” Lucifer lied easily, gripping your hair tightly as a warning. “It does that sometimes… scares me half to death when I’m alone after hours.” He chuckled and gestured towards the door when he saw a message on his desk phone light up. “My receptionist is already here to see you out… Please be sure to drive safely home.” 

“I will. Thank you again.” 

The pain of his hand in your hair grounded you as you rode out the unbidden orgasm. As soon as the elevator was on its way down, the pressure of his cock filling your mouth and throat as you were roughly pulled away from him. You gasped, tears of relief streaked down your face as you took deep unhindered breaths to clear your mind. Whatever plans you had to swallow his load earlier were completely dashed as he pulled you off his cock. 

He slid his chair back assessing your disheveled figure under his desk.  The sight of your drool and lipstick smeared across your face, your hair an absolute rat’s nest from the rough treatment and your trembling form in the aftershocks of your sudden orgasm did things to him he hadn’t expected. He knew he had you trained well with the toys; but it never crossed his mind just how much power his words had over you. Just the casual phrase he let slip had made you cum. The knowledge of that sent a thrill through his body as he immediately started to scheme all the things he could do to you. 

Lucifer glanced down at his cock, looking at the long red streaks of lipstick smeared all across the length. He smirked, loving how the color looked against it. “I was right… that color does look good all over my cock.” He pushed his chair back again to give you just enough room to timidly crawl out from under the desk and stretch your aching muscles. Seeing you on all fours also made him want to do things to you, things that would have to wait until later. “I was going to reward you for a job well done.” He started, pulling you up and sitting you on the edge of his desk. “But unfortunately… it looks like someone got too much pleasure out of this exchange without my permission.” 

His hands spread your thighs apart for him and he pushed your soaked panties to the side, the toys peeking out of your ass and your pussy were absolutely drenched in your juices. Your nether region quivered, and pulsated around the small toy, trying to milk it as you had done to his cock months prior. “Every one of your orgasms… belong to me.”

“Ye… yes, Sir…” you breathed. “I’m sorry, Sir. It won’t happen again, Sir.” you babbled, praying he would forgive you. 

“I suppose I can cut you some slack. Even I didn’t know how sensitive you can be from my words.” His fingers stroked your labia, his touch driving you insane. It had been so long since he had last been intimate with you like this, your whole body was in complete sensation overdrive as it relished being touched by him again. Sure, he spent a few minutes every day prepping your ass; but that was nothing compared to what he was giving you now. 

“Thank you sir.” You sobbed, your heart nearly beating out of your chest at the prospect of feeling more of him. 

“Of course… It’s only proper that I congratulate you on making it through the probationary period.” He replied casually, pulling the plug out of your ass and letting it drop to the ground. He chuckled, as you whined, feeling your anus being stretched out as it exited you and then feeling the emptiness that came after it. The toy in your pussy came out next, but he made sure to take his sweet time to drag it out of you, watching it come out bit by bit. The needy whine that came from your lips as your empty cunt begged to be filled again was music to his ears. 

It was only a short moment after that all your needs were fulfilled. His cock easily slid into you, assisted by the copious amounts of your essence that coated your nether region. The dull thud of the toy hitting the ground sounded so distant. All that mattered was finally feeling full and having your needs satiated by Lucifer. With no one else in the office anymore, you moaned loudly, throwing your head back and clutching the edge of the desk to brace yourself. Your legs wrapped around his waist, drawing him closer towards you. It had been so long since you had felt his cock inside of you; yet, your body seemed to remember every ridge and edge of it as he filled you up. 

“Does that feel good?” He purred, very pleased at your reaction. Holding off on fucking you was possibly the best decision he had ever made. However, now that he had you, he knew he couldn’t hold off again like that. Not when your heat surrounded him and released all the carnal desire he had reigned in for the past months. 

“Yes… Yes, Sir!” 

“You’ve wanted this for a long time, now huh?” he asked, starting a slow and steady pace to build you up to yet another explosive orgasm. “The toys I gave you weren’t enough? You wanted this inside of you instead, huh?” 

“Yes… Yes… “ You were delirious, swimming in a sea of pure pleasure as his cock hit every sensitive spot in you that had been craving attention for months now. You couldn’t see or think straight. It was all like the first time you had coupled during your interview. All of it was so intense and amazing, it took your breath away. “I want you so much, Sir. I can’t stop thinking about you.” you admitted freely. 

“What a good girl…” he praised, stroking your hair gently. “Your hard work will be rewarded.” He said before roughly slamming his hips into you and burying his whole length into you. Your cries of pleasure rang in his ear as he picked up the pace and chased his release inside of you. Your walls, so tight after your first orgasm hugged him deliciously and he saw stars every time he was balls deep inside of you. 

“Oh… thank you! Thank you, Sir.” you sang endless praises for him as he fucked you senseless, taking you to highs you had never experienced. Being teased for months on end had made all your nerves so sensitive, you could barely handle the reward he was giving you; and that was possibly the best part of it all. “This is the best… reward.. Thank you… thank y---” 

Lucifer cut off your words with a deep kiss, shoving his tongue roughly into your mouth and exploring your mouth. He could taste traces of him in you and it only served to make his hips snap into yours even faster and harder. He was close again. Anytime it came to being inside of you, he knew it would be over soon. Perhaps that was why he preferred to tease you for such long periods of time. The payoff was so worth it in the end. 

“Cum.” he commanded once he broke his kiss with you. “Cum like you did the first time, milk me.” He hissed, his pace now erratic and needy. 

“Yes! Yes! Yes, Sir!” you obliged, the pleasure building up in your abdomen crumbling all at once and you came around his cock hard. Your vision whiting out for a moment and your ears ringing from the force of your climax. 

It only took a few more brutal thrusts before he emptied himself inside of you with a satisfied groan, his long lashes fluttering as your walls pulsed around him and accepted every drop of his seed. “Very good…” He murmured softly, holding you in a close embrace and patting your hair as the both of you came down from the highs of your orgasms. 

Lucifer hissed as he pulled out of you once he was soft enough to do so. The image of his cum dripping out of you was so enticing, it almost made him hard again. Satisfied that you were properly trained for his needs, he adjusted your panties back over your crotch and looked up at your blissed out face. “Congratulations, you’re now a permanent member of my staff.” He cooed, leaning in and placing a soft kiss on your forehead. 

You weren’t even in the right mindset to thank him, your brain reeling from the pleasure and your body relaxing after finally getting the release you had been craving for months. His words sounded like they were coming from under water, muffled and garbled. You blinked, in a haze, trying to focus. 

It wasn’t until something cool hit your neck that you jolted to consciousness, grounding yourself with the new sensation against your heated skin. A thin, delicate chain held up a beautiful pendant in the shape of a peacock feather now adorned your neck. In your high, Lucifer had pulled the gift out from his desk and helped himself to putting it on you. 

“A small gift… I think it suits you.” he explained softly. 

“Thank you…” You said, rather touched by the gentle gesture. “I’ll wear it with pride.” 

“I expect nothing less from you.” 

It was true, humans didn’t know much at all until they were trained. You were proof of that and he couldn’t wait to see what other things he could teach you to do with your body.

[shinjukuspiritcommittee]

Top 20 2021

My Favorites (updated)

Hello my readers, it’s been a while since I just posted something not related to a headcanon and I am doing one right now. I just wanted to take a bit of a break to just get SOMETHING on here on my days off work. Plus I’m just trying to find my groove when it comes to writing again so hopefully this helps me just get back into the mood of making a post more often lol. I wanted to revisit this topic for a while just because we’ve had a lot more events and a lot more alts in the game were added. And I know for a fact LifeWonders reads these posts in some capacity because I have meme’d an AR into the game with my top picks from the last list I did for Christmas 2019. No I didn’t. I’m just joking around and I know LifeWonders doesn’t read this.

Anyways rather than just make up a list on the spot like last year I decided to use the Housamo Sortmaker (Link: https://club.housamo.xyz/sortmaker/ ) to try and make a list that’s more revealing to what I was thinking at the time. Since I talked about 20 characters ish last time I’m just gonna read from my 20th place to my 1st place spots and try to justify whatever I was thinking at the time. Anyways-

20: Marchosias and Susan: This one was a surprise for me if I’m being honest but I’m just gonna blame the fact on Shukou’s recent involvement with LifeWonders in the form of Live A Hero and how Ryekie and Mokdai live in my headspace rent free whenever I think about the characters in that game. Maybe we can see about getting some LAH headcanons since that’s a LifeWonders property too). So out of all the characters Shukou drew for Housamo why did I pick Marchosias? Easy, it’s been 4 years and this poor man has yet to receive a proper alt or any kind of skin for that matter and I think that it’s a crime. Sure he’s not my favorite but he’s definitely grown on me because he’s just a gentle dad kind of character and his design has grown on me over the years. I just hope he doesn’t get left behind since he has a lot of really interesting and potential things to look forward to in the future given how the main story has unfolded.

19: Shiva/Algernon: The helmet heads are together because DAI XT quickly became my favorite artist for Fire Emblem Heroes and I really just like their designs. DAI XT just knows how to draw robots, armor and muscles well. Also Chapter 11 with Shiva you can read into some interesting perspectives. I don’t want to spoil any of the untranslated content for anyone who’s waiting for the official english translation. But if you are curious Roureem has a blogspot where he posts summaries of the newly released events.

Link: https://housamosummaries.blogspot.com/

18: Cthugha: I love this goober so much. He’d constantly try to act super sentai just trying say good morning everyday. He may not be very bright but that just adds to his charm and honestly I enjoy how he always tries to play the hero in a lot of scenarios because it’s refreshing when they implement him after a bunch of heavy hitting story stuff. I’m not gonna spoil too much about it but I will say he’s more than welcome after everything Chapter 10 and 11 put the reader through.

17: Mineaki: I’ve made a post about him being one of my least favorites way back when I first started this blog and let me just say how times have changed and I’ve learned the value of not judging a book by it’s cover. I still think there’s something a bit off about Kowmei’s style for his characters, but Mineaki has definitely grown on me. He’s a caring instructor who does watch out for his students even if it’s not always in the most direct way possible. Not to get into too many spoilers he’s got a lot of intrigue around him as well and I am curious to see his role get expanded down the line.

16: Ded: Housamo is the reason I really like christmas. The Christmas stories despite following a similar structure to each other do tend to be my favorite stories. Ded himself is also just another good dad character. He’s also two guys for the price of one, so I mean… you know… you’ve got the forever ask your other dad situation. There wasn’t much thought put into this choice I just like santa as a concept because I think the outfits are cute, it’s always nice to get something for people you care about on Christmas and Ded is the perfect embodiment of both sides to Christmas.

15: Shinya: Everyone we need to manifest buff Shinya for 2021, this is not a drill. This is legitimate. We must make Taromati’s and my wish come true. To be more serious again he’s just a sweet and gentle character. He’s also drawn by my favorite Housamo artist. Their characters always just look so naturally good. I’m just surprised he hasn’t gotten much of an alt given he’s perfect material for Valentine’s day. He’s just a soft boy and I would love for him to be in more things because I just enjoy seeing him.

14: Jacob: I have to be honest Jacob is on here because every time I look at him he just gets more handsome to me. I wasn’t all that impressed with his introduction and we don’t know much about his background but I’ve just been drawn to him more and more. Maybe it’s just because he’s drawn by GomTang? I just like looking at him and I can’t help it. To speak a bit less crass he’s another gentleman kind of guy and those are always nice.

13: Shennong: Yeah I like the doc a lot. Firstly, I’m a huge sucker for big bulls and Shennong fits the bill. The white fur really adds to his appeal visually and the purple horns give off a bit of an unnatural appearance. Shen feels like someone who’s been touch starved and alone for a long time given how he acts as a character and when we actually hug him I just lost it. He always has others well being on his mind so he’s not afraid to jump in and help, or give a much needed lecture about when you need to take better care of yourself. He just comes across as very well balanced overall.

12: Heracles: I won’t lie- at first he didn’t interest me much. He looked incredibly plain when among the rest of the cast and he seemed like the typical “bait” character since the banner had Echo, Barguest, Gyumao and Snow. But after reading the translation for Valentine Time Slip I was taken aback at how much of a gentle giant he turned out to be and I just really liked his interactions with the others in that event. And honestly his special quest from that year was one of the more unique ones given the slower pace and more romantic vibe it had. After the event warmed my heart I did a complete 180 and I just knew I really liked him.

11. Yasuyori: Before I start praising him I feel I have to justify why he didn’t quite make top 10 and it will have some mild Chapter 10 spoilers. To be as vague as possible his resolution just didn’t vibe with me at the end of Chapter 10. Like it wasn’t a bad resolution and it was the right choice to make but in my opinion there really wasn’t a moment I felt was clear where he made a choice for himself. Everything just sort of happened around him and it felt like he didn’t really do much to improve his situation. To an extent I kind of see that being the idea given his origins and the story he’s based on and there is some semblance of him coming to terms with himself alongside his isolation being portrayed pretty well, but I just wasn’t satisfied with it as much as I would like to be. With that out of the way, oh my god I just want this boy to never stop smiling and I just want to give him hugs constantly please he just deserves to be happy!!! Yasuyori is a character who’s got a lot of baggage and he’s just trying to find ways to properly cope with his trauma and not repeat past mistakes and I just really like that idea. His role in Xmas 2020 (sorry I just forgot the name of that event, but its when he gets his alt) was a much better representation for his character in my eyes. I’m not gonna spoil anything like I keep saying but he isn’t one to disappoint in future appearances and I just hope this lovable lug keeps getting the support he deserves.

10: Hephaestus: A spicy way to start the latter half of the list. I just want to give this lad a hug and tell him he is worthy of love. But at the same time he is a little shit… and I love that. I can’t fully explain why I grow a paternal instinct in me seeing this grown man sob about his mother but I just do. I want to keep him safe and give him all the affection he wants. Though I am aware a lot of Hephaestus’s interest in his parental figure is… questionable. I am just gonna say I would accept his love for what it is and he just wants approval.

9. Shuten: I’ll be honest I have no proper reason for why I like Shuten so much. He’s just a cool and reliable guy. He just seems like a go with the flow kind of person most of the time and he’s a bit more direct than most of the characters which I always appreciate. Plus I have an unspoken bias for naop guys in Housamo.

8. Durga: While not number 1 on this list, I still really like Durga. She’s quirky but not to an annoying degree, she’s determined and definitely very confident in her own abilities. Her growing to be more sociable throughout her events is something I enjoy seeing because it really creates this sense of growth.

7. Kyuma: I get a lot of people don’t like Kowmei’s art but I really think we should look past it because Kyuma is one of the sweeter picks. He’s someone who just wants to prove himself for his own worth and not what David can provide, but David is part of him and it just creates the potential for a good arc. Plus this boy is unintentionally smooth and will just take your heart when possible. I honestly want to see Kyuma more in events because he’s honestly the jock that carries 3 of the 4 brain cells. He’s also the last one without an alt so I’m just hoping he gets one in 2021 because he really deserves one in my opinion. (Also fan art makes him really cute).

6. Tomte: Tomte is relatively new but honestly his event in 2019 really endeared me to him. I’m trying to be spoiler free because the best way to enjoy these stories is for yourselves but let me just say his arc in the event was really endearing to me and much more than I was expecting. His fan service is also incredibly hammy and I love it. Visually Tomte is one of my favorites, I love his multi colored hair and starlit pupils cuz it makes his otherwise more generic look have some flare. I knew I liked him out the box and when I read about him in the summaries and can’t wait to read the official translation for him. I was just very endeared.

5. Tetsuya: Tetsuya fucks. Moving on…

Jokes aside this one’s a bit simple. I have no shame in admitting I think he’s attractive and his whole resistance towards wanting a relationship is cute in a weird roundabout way. When he says no I just want it MORE. I just really like duo haired tsunderes.

4. Kengo: Kengo 3rd alt 2021. Please LifeWonders I need my favorite Summoner. He’s a bro and that’s what counts. Kengo has got your back, not afraid to rely on you, a very fun and dynamic guy. Sure he’s not that bright when it comes to making plans or any book smart, but there are times where he’s the best at being able to read the room or just understand what someone needs to hear even if it isn’t always what someone wants to hear. His bullheaded nature is actually one of his redeeming qualities because it’s nice to just not overcomplicate things and just understand what’s actually going on. Yes the early story didn’t do many favors for him but to me the events, especially the later ones, do much more work for his character. To me, at least.

3. Ashigara: Ashigara is best bear, and I will defend that stance in 2021. The main thing that draws me to Ashigara is that I can see a bit of myself in him. He gets very emotional when he gets left alone, he’s very loud when with his friends, has a tendency of speaking his mind- just someone who wears his heart on his sleeve. I also appreciate that in spite of the negative he isn’t someone who backs down when the going gets tough and in a few instances he’s able to hold his ground physically at least.

2. Wakan Tanka: Love at first sight. This ray of sunshine still persists as the number 1 husband, but number 2 character. Firstly I am a huge fan of the partial beast aesthetic. The buffalo ears and the horns  are absolutely adorable. Secondly he’s a perfect body type; he’s not too muscular but not exactly flabby. Third he is just so positive and I love that. He’s someone I admire and wanna hug.

1. Taurus Mask: The more things change the more they stay the same. I’m still a big Taurus Mask fan for all the same reasons as last time. I just… relate to this boy. He is an incredibly shy boy who uses his public persona for confidence. Maybe I’m reading too much into it but it’s like we’re soul bros!

So yeah, my tastes haven’t changed in a year and a half.

[prettyflyshyguy]

Oops I wrote more C virus stuff

I got super energised and spent all night drafting up a one-shot about what happens when Ashley reunites with Leon post RE6 in the C-Virus AU cannon. It’s unfinished and is very much a draft, but I’m excited so I wanted to post what I have so far. I intend on compiling a bunch of these together and putting them up as chapters on AO3 and Fanfic.net once they’re edited, featuring various different characters.

You came this far just to become a Monster - The Aftermath

A brief summary: Ashley visits Leon while he’s stuck in quarantine. It gets a bit emotional. 

I’m assuming the President in RE6 was the same in RE4 despite the uh long time difference between the two games. It’s 9 years and I’m Australian so I know nothing about American politics but I think a president can only serve 8 years in one stint so uh maybe he’d just been elected in 4 and was just running out of time before he died in 6? I’m rolling with that for the sake of my head-cannon/AU storylines. It makes sense given Leon was described as being good friends with him, and we can assume the friendship started once he got Ashley back home safely after the events of 4. 

Given Ashley was 19/20 during RE4 she should be 28/29 post RE6 depending on her birthday. 

-

The conversation with Hunnigan echoed in her mind as she walked down the labs corridor. 

“While pursuing Chief Security Advisor Simmons, Leon became infected with the C Virus. He’s OK, don’t worry. It’s just we’re still running tests to make sure he’ll stay ok.

I know the report I gave you didn’t have much to go on in it, I’m sorry. I wasn’t allowed to provide you with much more information. You’ll just have to wait until you can see him for yourself.

He’s happy to talk with you, you can go down to the labs today if you’d like.”

“He’s happy to talk? You mean I can’t see him?”

The warm smile was betrayed by the sorrow in Hunnigan’s eyes. 

“He’s still adjusting to everything. He’s spoken to a couple of our doctors and he’s dealing with a lot of internal negative emotions right now, about what people think of him. I don’t think the tests are helping.”

Hunnigan reached out and gently held Ashley’s hand, squeezing it lightly.

“Don’t worry, I’m sure he’ll be happy to have you visit. It’s what he really needs right now. Trust me.”

-

Standing outside the viewing room door, holding her keycard at the ready, she steeled herself. The way the security staff described the setup, Leon had access to a shutter system on the viewing window, giving him control over how and when visitors can see him. It allowed him much needed privacy given his life since coming home was endless tests and scans and scientists. 

Tapping her card against the reader, the light flicked green and she heard the lock release. Pressing down on the cold handle, she slipped inside. There was a small coffee table near the viewing window, the shutter was down. A few chairs were on the far wall, she pulled one up to the window and sat down. On the table there was a remote control, it looked custom made for the setup. It only had a handful of buttons, the most important of which was a ‘call’ button that she was told would alert Leon that someone was in the room, and a ‘mic on’ button. The room had an inbuilt microphone and speaker system to allow comfortable communication even if large groups were there. 

It felt uncomfortably sterile. Worse than a hospital. She looked up to the top left corner of the room, where a security camera stared back. She was also told Leon had access to the feed. She wondered if he was watching now? Hunnigan said she’d call ahead. Was he waiting for her to do something first? Would he be upset that she was so hesitant? 

Shaking off the feeling she hit both buttons on the controller and flashed a smile and a wave towards the security camera, for good measure.

A moment passed before she heard a light clicking sound on the intercom, before a voice emerged.

“Ashley, hey…”

She was surprised that he sounded so… Normal. She wasn't sure what she expected, no one had given her any information other than that he’d been infected but he hadn’t lost his mind. There was an extensive report written about the events that went down, she’d been able to convince the BSAA to let her read a copy of it but it was heavily redacted. Particularly the parts pertaining to Leon. 

“It’s… good to see you.”

She was relieved to hear the sincerity in his voice, despite how slightly rough around the edges he sounded. He was Leon, that hadn’t changed. But she could tell he was different all the same.

“It’s good to, uh, hear you, haha..”

Her feet shuffled, she started bouncing one leg. Looking longfully at the window glass with the shutter still closed. She was fine with phone calls but this was making her nervous. It hadn’t been that long ago that they’d last spoke, that they’d last caught up in person. 

“I’m sorry, about your dad. I’m sorry I couldn't make it to the funeral. I’m sorry for everything, Ashley.”

“It’s ok, Leon. You did everything you could.”

Despite the lack of contact, the uncomfortable fog in the room was palpable for both parties. Her leg bouncing rate increased. Shuffling could be heard over the intercom speaker. They each heard the pain in the other’s voice. The wound was still fresh and very deep. 

Not wanting to have that conversation to a wall, Ashley attempted to change the subject.

“So how are you holding up? I mean with the tests and everything. Hunnigan said you shouldn't have to be in isolation much longer.”

“Uhh yeah… It’s fine. I’m doing fine.”

She let out a small sigh.

“You can’t bullshit me, Leon.”

Silence. 

“You’ve been stuck inside that room for almost three months now. You must be tired of it, and lonely.”

She paused, before continuing.

“When I got back from Europe after you rescued me, they kept me in isolation for precautionary testing for two weeks. They were paranoid I guess. I know for you they didn’t need long to clear you of any issues. Those two weeks were the worst of my life.”

“Worse than being injected with a mind-controlling parasite?” he joked back. 

“Much, much worse.” she playfully replied, “I didn’t have a strong, capable, and handsome government agent to save me from a bunch of creepy scientists in hazmat suits.”

She heard what sounded like a muffled laugh. A smile crossed her face. 

“Unfortunately for me the only ‘strong, capable, and handsome’ government agent I know is limited to Visitors on Wednesdays only.”

This made Ashley giggle suddenly, the first time she’d properly and genuinely laughed since before the C-Virus incident even occurred. 

“When I came home, Dad was so worried. He just wanted to make sure I was gonna be ok. He was always so busy and worked so hard. He just wanted to make sure he could change something for the positive. In the end you made sure that happened. You and Helena.”

A tear rolled down her cheek and gently dropped off her chin. Followed by another.

“I’d known Simmons for just about my whole life, he’d had family dinners with us, we’d visit his house frequently. Dad had confided in him about so much I just… I can’t believe he’d betray us like that. I can’t believe he would be so selfish.”

The tears were making it hard for her to see, her words were mixed in with sharp breaths as she began to sob.

“He killed dad and all those people, after everything, he just fucking killed him and killed everyone else and burned it to the ground all for what!! And now he’s gone and I don’t know what to do, Leon I just don’t know what to fucking do!”

She cried for a moment, letting the anger and the grief flow. Purging her system, letting it out. As she started to calm down she pulled a packet of tissues from her bag, to clean her face.

“I want to make a difference. I want to do something, like dad did.” she said slowly through strained breaths.

“I never want to feel helpless and small ever again. After you rescued me in Europe, after everything you did to stop Simmons, I want to do something for the world too.” 

She glanced up at the security camera, as if it would respond back somehow. Hoping he was watching.

“You and dad made me realise what I wanted to do with my life, what I cared most about. I even changed my college degree to International Relations when I got home but I mean, you already know that. Now with the BSAA here, I’ve asked Hunnigan if she can help me shift my career slightly, and work with you and everyone else here.”

“Really? You want to work for the BSAA?”

She nodded, not knowing if he could even see. Taking the moment to have a drink from her water bottle to gather herself.

“... I’ll put in a personal recommendation, if they’re still accepting those from me after everything.”

“Thank you Leon, I’m sure they will.” Ashley smiled.

“Well if they let me do anything, once the tests are cleared, I’d like to go visit your old man with you. If you don’t mind. I couldn’t be there for the funeral so… “

“Of course Leon,” she wiped a tear from her eye, “I’d love that. I’m sure dad would too.”

“I think you’d be great here, we need more people like you Ashley.”

“Of course, someone needs to be around to stop you getting into more trouble right?”

She was hoping for a smart ass response, a laugh, a quip, something. Her comment was met with silence. Her heart sank.

“What happened to you, Leon?”

He avoided responding, she could hear more slight shuffling noises.

“I know you feel uncomfortable, god knows I would too. Everyone’s talking about you, saying you’re a hero. You and all the others that worked together to stop the C-Virus from spreading. You saved people's lives.”

“... I don’t think you’d be calling me that if you could see me right now.”

The most she’d gotten to read about the effects of the virus on him were small comments about carapace and ‘external structural changes’. In all honestly she had no idea what he looked like, if he was even recognisable. She didn’t really know how to ask, besides the fact she really only knew Hunnigan well enough to be confident posing the question.

“I wouldn’t know. No one’s shown me any photos of you. I have no idea.”

He was silent again.

“But you’re still you, in the end. Does it matter what you look like?”

“It does when you look like a monster.”

She recoiled slightly at the tone of his voice.

“When I was in China, when it happened. It didn’t really matter to me. People's lives were at stake, Simmons was out there, I embraced it in the moment because I couldn't let people down. I needed to do something. I couldn't just give up and avoid facing the world. But now? I’m stuck in this cell and every few days I get more needles poked into me and more scans and more people asking me stupid fucking questions and I just.”

He paused suddenly. Breathing for a few moments.

“I can’t deal with all of this. I’m as good as a lab animal now. And why would anyone think any differently if they saw what I’ve become.”

“C’mon, don’t say that.”

Suddenly the shutter began to move upwards, a brighter light from the room beyond the glass spilling in. It took Ashley a moment to adjust before she could fully stare at the figure sitting opposite her.

“If you were in trouble and the thing that came to help you looked like this, would you still call it a hero?” 

[totallynormalfanficauthor]

The Visitor - Chapter 6 (Final)

Short Summary: Jack finds Sally outside his home, so he invites her inside

Pairings: Jack/Sally

——

Chapter Six

Just Friends... For now

"You've hardly touched your soup, Sally. Not hungry?" Finkelstein's voice came from across the table. She looked up.

"Oh. Um, no. Not really." She released the note and folded her hands on the table. "My, uh, stomach doesn't feel too well. May I be excused, Doctor?"

"Hmm" he grumbled. "Alright. Fine. Go ahead, get some rest." The end of his sentence was muffled by the spoon in his mouth. Sally smiled and stood up, thanking him as she headed for the ramp in the other room. But his voice stopped her for a moment before she could get there. "-I'll be up to check on you in a little while, so don't think about sneaking out again. Alright?"

She nodded her reply- although she didn't really mean it- and finally headed up the ramp and into her bedroom.

Once there, Sally sat down on her bed and held back a deep sigh. She debated on what to do as she glanced at the window. It was a bit soon, but would it really hurt to get there a little bit early? Afterall, it might do her good to relax and calm her nerves before Jack arrives.

She hopped off the bed and trotted up to the window. Sally observed the scene below her- it was a gorgeous evening. The breeze was soft, and she could tell from the sky that the sun would be setting soon. It seemed now would be a fine time to head out.

Clicking the window open, Sally flung her left leg over sill, and soon the rest of her, until she was falling quickly onto the golden leaf covered pavement below.

When she opened her eyes, the world around her was dark until her vision finally focused. Blinking, Sally sat up. Her right arm was barely hanging on by a thread, and her left leg had come apart at her thigh. She quickly stuffed the leaves back in and sewed herself up, and, using the side of the building to balance herself, she stood. After hesitating for a moment, her trip to the spiral hill had begun.

——

The pumpkin sun had barely begun to go down by the time she got there. Sally approached the withered gate. She found her hands slightly shaky, which was odd. Perhaps she was more nervous to speak with Jack than she originally thought.

A breeze swept through her hair and around her neck as she passed through, giving her chills.

Not much had changed about this place since the last time she was here, which had been quite awhile ago. It was nice to be back. Fog still covered the gravestones, moss lined the ground by her feet, the atmosphere was still creepy, yet soothing. It was a nice feeling.

Sally's eyes scanned the area around her. As they glanced around, her gaze found its way to the hill. A tall figure was standing at the top.

Jack.

He was already here. It startled her a little bit- she really was expecting to have arrived before him. But seeing as he was already waiting on her, there was no point in hesitating any longer. She approached the hill from the side, quietly, waiting for him to notice her. He must have been able to hear the crunch of the leaves under her feet, because after one step closer the skeleton suddenly turned to her direction, spotting her immediately. He looked a little surprised, but forced a smile anyway. She smiled back. Stepping a tad closer to her, he greeted, "Horrible evening, Sally"

"Horrible evening, Jack"

He nodded to her and finally took a seat on the hill, motioning next to him. "Please, some sit."

Sally did as asked and started her way up, sitting down a few spaces beside him. She awkwardly forced a smile as well. Her heart raced inside her chest. Finally, it was time... the conversation she had been waiting for. And there was no way out of it now. But as nerve wracking as it was, she couldn't wait to hear what he had to say.

"I'm glad you could make it.", Jack started.

"Oh, yes. I am too.."

The skeleton sat back a little, Sally noticed him avoiding her gaze. "I hope it wasn't any trouble? I know this was kind of short notice.."

"No, no. Not at all."

"Well, that's a relief...I-"

"Arf!"

The bark of a dog sounded to their left, cutting him off. Sally recognized it right away: Zero. And when she looked, sure enough, the ghostly pup had come up beside them, holding what must have been one of Jack's ribs in his mouth.

"Oh, Zero! Thanks, boy." Jack took the rib back and popped it into his shirt, then patted the dog on the head. Zero licked his hand before yawning, turning and flying away, barely acknowledging Sally. She watched him go with a smile.

"He's a very good dog..."

"Yes, he is."

"Did you train him?"

"I did."

"Well..." She folded her legs. "...you did a very good job."

"Thank you. Zero is a fast learner, so it wasn't too difficult."

"I see..."

They both grew silent. The ragdoll shuffled in her seat, unsure if it was because of the cold, uncomfortable ground beneath her or from the awkward tension rapidly growing between the two. The wind continued to whistle past them, and Sally gazed up at the large moon. She brought up all her courage, finally ready to finally ask what's been on her mind.

"...Jack..?"

"Yes?"

"...." she took a deep breath. "....was there a reason you asked me here..? Something you wanted to...discuss?" Her words came out a bit shaky, but Jack didn't seem to notice.

Sally watched his posture stiffen, his hands nervously tugging at the ground. But it was hard to read the expression on his face. "Ah..yes, of course..." he cleared his throat before continuing. "...I assume you may already have a bit of an idea on... what this is about?"

Her heart thumped, "I might.."

"I thought maybe..." Jack sighed, finally tilting his head up to make eye contact with her. She shivered as his sockets met hers. "Sally, you know that, you and I have been good friends for quite some time. And I do enjoy spending time with you, really. You listen and understand me better than anyone else. So please, understand that I care about you." He paused momentarily, looking at his friend. Sally's eyes were wide, her cheeks slightly pink. She liked the way this sounded, and hoped it was going where she thought it was. He continued.

"I think that...sometimes, when we get caught up in the moment, we're not...thinking properly. Or at least, I know I wasn't thinking properly. And it doesn't help when, you don't fully understand the way you feel. Don't get me wrong, I did mean everything I said about you that night.. but, I guess, what I'm trying to say is that..."

Yes...!

"...I'm sorry, Sally"

....what...?

"I shouldn't have kissed you. It was wrong of me. I'd never want.. to make you feel uncomfortable in any way. So I sincerely apologize if I did."

Sally felt something inside of her break. He was....apologizing? She could feel the frown making its way onto her lips. Perhaps she got her hopes up too soon... but Jack wasn't finished talking yet.

"When I saw you in the morning I could tell... something was off by the way you were behaving. That's why I wanted to speak with you this evening. I can assure you, Sally, the, ah.. Kiss, it didn't mean anything. I'd never want you to think bad of me... and, really, I view you as nothing more than a dear friend of mine- of course. But I'm hoping, now that this has been cleared up, it will make things a little less... awkward, heh. Wouldn't you agree?"

The skeleton smiled a bit as he looked at her, but his expression quickly faltered.

"...Sally..?"

He tilted his head. The ragdoll wasn't smiling. She stared downwords, eyeing the ground. Her hands were shaky, and her breath was coming out slow and shallow. It felt like the world around her was shattering. Jack's words were replaying inside her head, tearing a piece of her heart each time they did.

It...meant....nothing...?

All hopes for this moment were gone. Of course it meant nothing...she suddenly felt ridiculous for ever thinking otherwise. Deep down inside she knew this would happen. But it still hurt. A lot.

"..Sally...? Are you... crying?"

"What?" She lifted her head suddenly, reaching up to slide a finger under her eye. Sure enough, it was wet. Somehow the tears must have slipped out without her noticing. She quickly wiped them away then dried her hands on her dress. She did her best to collect herself, not wanting to appear too upset- although, even she knew it was a little late for that.

"N-no, I'm not. I'm fine. And, yes, of course. I... I agree with you, Jack.." She did her best to force a smile. Jack didn't look convinced.

"Are you... sure?"

"What? Of course I am. I-I think that, we both just, as you said.... not thinking straight. You never made me uncomfortable, I think I was, was just confused.." She managed to reply through wobbly lips. But her voice cracked at her next sentence, "Of course I...I only view you as a...as a friend as well. I mean that's what we are, right? It would p-probably be better if we just forgot about all of this anyways.."

"I suppose so..." Jack looked at her, frowning with a puzzled expression. "Sally... please, what's the matter? You seem upset."

"I..." she thought for a moment. Should she...tell him? Tell him the truth? That she was actually in love with him and has been the whole time?

What's the point... he already said he only sees me as a friend. What, am I trying to get rejected even harder?

"...I'm just tired Jack, really. It's been a long day. And I think... I got something in my eye. That's all."

Jack didn't seem too convinced, but didn't argue this time. "Oh... alright. If you say so."

"I really do agree with you, I promise. And I'm... I'm glad we were able to talk. I appreciate the, uh...c-clarification."

"Of course." The skeleton sat up a little, resting his hands on his knees. "I know it hasn't been long, but I'm sure things will be back to normal between us now."

"Yes..."

They both fell silent again. Jack was watching her quietly, while Sally stared at the ground in front of her. She was still holding back tears and trying to think of anything besides the pit of emptiness and despair that was growing quickly inside her stomach, torn open by the pieces of her broken heart.

"Jack...?"

"Hm?"

"Can I...ask you one more thing?"

"Of course"

She hesitated before boldly but genuinely asking, "..if it meant nothing, then, why did you kiss me?"

She found the courage to look up at him. He tapped his finger on his chin, eyes half closed in thought. After a moment, he sighed.

"Truthfully? I don't... really know." Their eyes met once again, a sorrowful glance. "Like I said... I don't think I was thinking correctly. I felt awfully... strange that night. I don't really know what it was that had come over me. But, I am terribly sorry, Sally. I'd never want to-"

"No, Jack, please. Don't apologize. It's okay." She let out another shuddering breath. ".. thank you for inviting me here, it was nice to speak with you."

"Of course, thank you for joining me."

Sally didn't respond, but gazed up at the moon. Another year rolled down her cheek, but in the darkness, Jack didn't seem to notice. He gazed at the sky as well.

"It's getting quite late.. perhaps we should get back."

"...that's okay, you go. I think I'd like to stay here for a little while longer."

There was concern in his reply, "are you sure? It gets quite chilly out here at night, and most likely darker too."

"That's alright."

"-if you come with me, I'd be happy to walk you home"

She had to bite her lip. God, what was this man trying to do? Of course, yes, give her another reason to remember why she fell so deep in love with him in the first place. Such a gentleman. And yet he broke her heart without even realizing what he had done.

"I'll find my way home later. It's okay."

"...well, if you're sure."

The pumpkin king stood up, brushing his suit off. He stepped past her and began heading down the hill. He called back his goodbye, but Sally did not turn to face him.

"We'll talk soon, Sal. Have a horrible night."

"Horrible night, Jack. Sleep well."

The only response that came was the crunching of leaves under Jack's feet and he crept down the hill and back through the graveyard. Sally turned to watch just as he went through the gate, and waved her final farewell. As soon as his figure disappeared down the trail, she couldn't hold herself back any longer.

Sally collapsed down onto the hill in sobs, the tears rolling down her stitched cheeks one after the other. She brought her hand up to cover her mouth in an attempt to muffle her cries. Her chest ached, and her hands and arms shook. This was an overwhelming sadness she had never felt before: absolute heartbreak.

Sally had known in the back of her mind the entire time that the chance of this happening was greater than she liked. But what was she to do about it? If Jack only wanted to be friends with her, then that's that. She was just going to have to accept it, as much as it pained her.

Propping herself up on her elbows, she wiped her eyes again, trying to calm herself down. Her weeping began to slow as she collected herself. But she was still sad.

'What am I supposed to do now...?' she wondered. Should she just... give up? Forget about her feelings for him entirely..? Perhaps that would be better... but, no. No.

Jack's words rang inside her head.

'I felt awfully... strange that night. I don't really know what it was that had come over me.'

Hm....

She sniffled. Felt strange... doesn't know what came over him... , something about that seemed oddly familiar.

Finally pulling herself together, Sally sat the rest of the way up again, staring into the night sky as the stars twinkled around her. The tears kept falling slowly, her nose sniffling quietly. She couldn't stop thinking about what her friend had said to her. Something about it seemed... not right. What did he mean he 'felt weird' ?

'But he told me he only sees me as a friend... this doesn't... make sense..' She shook her head. "Oh, Jack. You puzzle me."

Wiping her eyes for the final time, Sally stood up. The wind passed calmly through her yarn hair. She decided then that, all she could really do was go home. Go home, and sleep. Get the rest that she needed. And when she woke up in the morning... nothing would be different, would it? She would sneak out, see Jack again most likely, and everything would be back to how it was before. But maybe this... maybe this was a good thing. Despite everything that had happened that night, the pain she had felt and the tears she had cried, Sally still felt something.. else inside her heart, after what Jack had said. Like one tiny, tiny flame still burning at the bottom of a fireplace that had supposedly been put out. She couldn't help but think, and hope, with all of her phantom heart, that maybe, just maybe, there was still a chance her and Jack could end up together, even if it seemed so far from possible in this moment.

...

...

And she was right.

——

...

Sally always thought Skellington manor was a beautiful place. Jack's home, it was gorgeous on the inside and out. She always enjoyed being there, even if she hadn't gotten to visit very often as a good friend to the owner. Not that that mattered anymore.

Truth be told, she always felt at home around those parts. Even if it was hard for her to understand why. The energy it radiated was so oddly comforting. And it made her feel... happy. Perhaps it was a sign.

But had you told Sally years before that she would end up living within these walls? She may not have believed you.

But it was the truth.

It had taken a long time for Sally to get where she was now. But she was grateful for it, to be able to look back and think just how far she'd come. And it was worth the wait.

Sally often took time during her days and evenings, to relax on the soft furniture in her home and reflect on things in the past, just letting her mind wonder. And this is where she was now. She leaned her head back, drawing in a nice, long breath. The dim evening sunlight was shining through a window nearby, reflecting brightly off the golden ring on her finger.

She looked down, feeling a stir in her arms. The little bundle she was holding shifted over slightly, turning in it's sleep. She smiled. Moving the blanket away from its face, she gave her baby a kiss on the cheek. It wiggled a little, making a tiny grab motion with it's skeletal hand, but continued to snooze soundly. Sally sighed blissfully, closing her eyes. She felt content.

"Sally?"

She opened her eyes. Jack was walking into the room, his skull tilted and his hands behind his back. "Ah- there you are. I've been looking for you." He walked over and sat down on the couch next to her, leaning over to give her a long kiss on the forehead. She giggled a little at that.

"Yes. Is there something you need?"

"No. I just...wanted to see you."

Jack leaned over and placed his arm around her, holding her close. She leaned on his shoulder and yawned.

Reflecting back on how far she'd come with this skeleton man— that was her favorite. Even after all they had been through, Sally wouldn't have guessed that they'd actually end up together. And yet here she was. Holding the little skeleton baby in her arms, and wearing a matching ring on her finger. And she still loved him just as much as she always had, if not more.

...

It would be hard for Sally to forget that one moment. The moment when her world came crashing down, her heart split into two. When Jack said those horrible words to her-, "I view you as nothing more than a dear friend of mine". She thought he had meant it. And for a while, Jack did too. But slowly, with the more time that passed, he discovered: he did not.

In the end, it didn't matter what happened in the past, did it? Because the important thing was? They are together now. Together, happy, and in love. And Jack and Sally know, that they always will be, now and forever

[sondepoch]

Chapter 4

Written in the Stars (Lucifer x Angel!Reader)

Four thousand years is a long time. In the absence of your most cherished friend, it feels even longer. But when a certain student exchange program in the Devildom reunites you and Lucifer, things aren't the same. Because four thousand years of separation is a long time. And the love you once felt for Lucifer has changed into something different—something forbidden. But that might not even be your biggest problem, because with each passing day, your holy wings are turning blacker and blacker.

Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3 | Chapter 4 | Chapter 5 | Chapter 6 | Chapter 7 | Chapter 8 | Chapter 9 | ✔

MASTERLIST

Your D.D.D has an awful battery life.

That, or you're using it too much.

In fact, the latter is much more likely—given that, over this past weekend, you haven't gone over two hours without video calling one of the brothers—but that's hardly your fault.

The entire Devildom is in a frenzy right now, every demon going wild with anticipation.

The time has finally come for people to properly prepare for school, either mentally or physically, and the countdown has officially begun: not even twenty-four full hours remain before the first bell will ring, and everyone you know is buzzing about doing last-minute shopping. Neither the House of Lamentation nor Purgatory Hall are exempt from that, and the only reason you're not out of the dorm right now is because Simeon took pity on you and sent you home ahead of him, agreeing to buy the last of the items on the school supply list himself.

Such an angel, you think with a giggle, entering your room.

You waste no time in flopping onto your bed and plugging your D.D.D into its charger, flitting to Lucifer's number.

You don't even bother to take your Celestial cloak off, too preoccupied with the device's ringing to do anything other than use the garment as a blanket while you roll onto your stomach and place the device on your pillow.

This isn't quite your best angle, but Lucifer won't mind, right?

A smile blossoms on your face when you see the video call go through.

"MC, how many times have I asked you to text me in advance if you need me?" Lucifer sighs, acting stoic as he speaks. You can tell he doesn't mean the words, though.

"Aw, what kind of best friends are we if I need to set up an appointment to see you?" You laugh, biting back the sick feeling you get when you say that. Best friends. You still haven't forgotten how Lucifer almost kissed you two days ago when you came to him, crying. And you're certain you'll always remember how he chose not to.

Perhaps, if you hadn't been so focused on your own sorrow, you might have noticed the way Lucifer's eyebrows furrowed momentarily at the words, the demon disliking the label as much as you.

"Very well, then. What need have you of me this time, MC?" Lucifer leans back in his chair, angling his own D.D.D on his desk such that he doesn't need to hold it up.

"Um, just wanted to chat?"

Lucifer groans. "You said the same thing this morning, MC. And at four in the morning, when you called me saying you couldn't sleep—"

"Hey!" You protest. "It's not my fault that the Celestial Realm and the Devildom are in different time zones—"

"And the night before that," Lucifer continues, ignoring you entirely. "And in the afternoon before that, when you called me asking if I thought chairs had feelings."

"It's just such a tragic life, you know?" You ask, heart heavy at the thoughts that had run through your head yesterday afternoon. "They spend their entire lives serving, and people just sit on them. No one even says thank you!"

Lucifer massages his temple with one hand, closing his eyes in frustration. "We are not getting into this again."

"Fine, fine," You agree, pouting. "I just wanted to talk. What's up, Luci? Has Mammon caused any trouble for you since we last spoke?"

"Surprisingly, it's been Levi who's been an issue. Apparently, he ordered all his school supplies online, and they've still yet to come, so he's dragged the entire household out with him to buy the required goods in-person."

You laugh lightly. Even in the Celestial Realm, Levi had always preferred the indoors; imagining him braving the demon crowds of last-minute shoppers is quite the picture.

"Moreover, no one has seen Belphie awake since the last time you came over, so we're not sure if he even has everything he needs, but…"

"They'll manage," You say, interrupting Lucifer with a smile. "Don't stress—your brothers can handle themselves better than you think."

"Maybe so," Lucifer murmurs. "But what about you? How are you faring in all of this?"

You sigh.

Every single time you've called Lucifer these past two days, that's been the one question he's never failed to ask. He does it out of love, you know. He cares, and he simply wants to make sure that things haven't gotten worse.

But in truth…

"I haven't even looked at my wings, Luci." You laugh drily, staring at your pillow instead of Lucifer. You can already see the crestfallen look on his face. "I've been bathing in the dark and switching to my human form as often as I can so that I don't need to see them."

"MC…" He murmurs. You know that if he were here right now, he wouldn't hesitate to wrap you in a warm embrace and kiss your forehead between soft whispers that everything is going to be alright.

"No, you don't need to tell me. I know it's not the right thing to do." You put a hand up, halting him from starting whatever lecture is flitting around through his mind. "It's just...easier, this way."

Lucifer sighs.

"Let me see them," He murmurs. "We have to know if it's gotten worse."

"That's…" That's the reason why you don't want to look at them.

You swallow, suddenly acutely aware of how readily your tears had sprung forth the last time you stared at your reflection. The sight of your wings turning black at the root was too much to bear, and you doubt it's gotten any easier. At the same time, though, you don't want to cry to Lucifer. Not again.

"MC," The demon begins, voice gentle. "You don't have to look. But I need to know if it's gotten worse. Satan had some...theories, but I can't be sure about any of them until I look at the pattern of the growth."

It's a moment before you respond, but his words finally win you over in the end. You release some of your magical power, shifting back into the form you were born in. Burying your head face-down into the bed, you don't watch as your wings spread on your back, so great and majestic that they even push your Celestial cloak away as they rise to their full form.

You feel them flap once, then twice, as they stretch.

Staying silent yourself, you wait for Lucifer to make a comment, for him to say something about them. You just want him to look at them, take whatever notes he needs to, and then tell you you're good to shift back into your human form. You don't even care what they look like at this point; you just don't want to see them.

But when the demon continues to remain quiet, you can't deny that your curiosity is piqued.

"Lucifer?" You ask, peeking up with one eye. You avoid looking at the bottom left circle where your own reflection is, opting instead to stare at the shell-shocked expression on Lucifer's face. "What's wrong, Lucifer? Luci?"

You shift, moving your face up so that you can stare at him entirely, fear beginning to set in as you wonder what your wings could look like to have shocked him into such silence. "Are they…" Your voice trembles as you speak, terrified that you might have the truth of it. "Are they completely black?"

Your question startles Lucifer into alertness, and he blinks before a bewildered smile appears on his face. "No!" He responds, almost too quickly. He double taps on the screen, zooming in on your image. "MC, your…" He hesitates, as if he himself doesn't believe what he's seeing. "Your wings are completely white."

Your eyes widen, darting down to the small bubble where your own camera mirrors yourself back at you and, sure enough, the feathers on your back have turned snowy once more—all the places that were once pitch-black now looking as fluffy and pristine as the clouds of your homeland's sky.

"Let me…Let me check," You murmur to Lucifer, stumbling out of bed to your full-length mirror. It's uncomfortable, because your Celestial cloak is still awkwardly bunched around your shoulders, but there's no doubting it: your wings are white.

You hear a relieved sound come from your phone, bordering on laughter as a wide smile spreads across Lucifer's face. And that same smile comes to your own lips as you twist your body around, even the feathers closest to your back turned whiter than the pearls of your teeth: divine, holy, and angelic.

"We have to celebrate," You say, turning to Lucifer with a beaming grin. "I'm coming over, and don't tell me not to! This is amazing!"

Lucifer chuckles, folding his arms in contentment. "I wouldn't dream of it. My brothers will be delighted to hear this news," He taps on the screen, checking the time. "Meet you in ten minutes?"

"Perfect! I'll see you soon!" You exclaim, practically pouncing on the bed to end the call so that you can run over to the House of Lamentation.

Instantly, you revert to your human form, knowing that it'll offend the demons passing by if you leave the house with your holy wings on display, but you don't waste a moment in yanking your D.D.D from its charger and darting out of the doors, giddy with excitement.

All the pain you felt at learning your wings had turned black is converted to excitement, and you feel like you're floating on the clouds as you skip to where you know Lucifer is. You feel like this is what it must be like to be high, to be so unabashedly happy that nothing feels like it can ever compare—as if nothing can turn your mood sour.

But the universe has never been kind, has it?

Rather, the world loves to give you happiness and then steal it; just like it gave you the Morningstar and then banished him, casting your one source of joy out of reach.

You should have known when your D.D.D began ringing that it wouldn't be good news. Heck, if the fact that someone is calling isn't enough to let you know something is up, you should be doubly on edge when you realize that it's Lucifer's contact who's lighting up your screen.

But in the end, it's the utterly defeated voice of Lucifer that brings you down from your high, halting you in your tracks as he tells you to stop.

"What?" You ask, suddenly concerned.

"Stop, MC." His words come out slow, as if it brings him pain each time he speaks. "Don't come over."

"W-why?" You stammer out, not understanding. The House of Lamentation is within eyesight, you can literally see it in the distance. "Lucifer, what's wrong?"

"You can't come over," He mumbles, and you hear a light clanging over the phone—as if the demon kicked something and it came crashing down. "Just…" He almost chokes, voice thick with emotion. With anger. With sadness. And with something else you can't quite place. "Just don't come."

With that, he hangs up the phone, probably expecting that you'll heed his words and return to Purgatory Hall. But when have you been one to mindlessly follow the orders of others, when your heart is screaming to disobey?

Your footsteps as they bring you to the House of Lamentation are a lot of things: slow, concerned, distressed. But they're not hesitant. There's not a single flicker of indecision in your feet as they move forward, growing faster and faster as Lucifer's drained voice replays in your head.

Never have you heard the demon sound so miserable, so upset, so frustrated.

And you're not going to leave him alone.

It takes nearly a minute of banging on the front door before he finally opens it, trying his hardest to maintain a frown as he looks down at you.

"I told you not to come," He mutters, stepping back. It's not an invitation inside, though. You can't help but feel like it's a strange attempt to create distance between the two of you, but enter regardless.

"Well?"

You remain silent, your lack of words a very question in itself. Rather, it's an inquiry that demands a response, and you won't say a thing until Lucifer explains what has caused his sudden mood shift.

It must be an entire minute before he finally speaks, voice low as he stares at the ground.

"It's me."

You gaze at Lucifer in confusion, not quite understanding. "What?"

"It's me," He repeats, crossing his arms. "I'm…" He hesitates, dark red eyes flitting up to yours, two rubies that never fail to leave you entranced. "I'm the reason your wings are turning black."

"What are you talking about, Lucifer? That's nonsense." The words leave your mouth as soon as you process his words, not even waiting a second to contemplate the truth of them. At your blatant denial, Lucifer chuckles, but it's a sad sound.

"MC." He says your name slowly, as if he's holding onto it. "Your wings turned black for the first time when you came to me, and they've returned to being white after a weekend of separation."

You scoff at his words. "That's so circumstantial, Lucifer. You, of all people, should know that—"

"No." Lucifer's voice is firm. Dejected, despondent, and melancholic, but firm. "MC, this is how it's always been. You're the only angel in all the realms who absorbs light instead of giving it off. You're...you're the child of light. Light nurtures you."

Lucifer pauses, waiting for you to say something, but he continues when you're silent. "My light used to be positive. I could always feel you pulling at it in the Celestial Realm—absorbing it, equalizing it. I forgot what it felt like, but you've been doing it here as well. But I'm…" He clenches his fist. "I'm a demon, now. The light I give off is dark, and it's been corrupting you."

"No," You murmur, the same pain painted on Lucifer's face spreading across your own. "You're wrong, Lucifer. You're wrong!"

With a trembling lip, you let your angel form manifest, trying to show him that your wings are white, but he won't even look at you.

"Leave," He whispers, gesturing to the door that's still open. "Leave now, MC. Before I turn your wings black a second time."

"No!" You exclaim, slamming the door with your foot, moving forward. "It's not true. It's not!"

"Stop," Lucifer warns, a flicker of anger lighting in his dark red eyes. Every footstep you take forward is met by himself retreating, desperate to maintain the distance between you two. "Do not come closer," He cautions you, and you can feel the rage building up as you blatantly ignore his words, dead set on marching forward until he's forced to acknowledge you. "This is for your own good—leave me!"

But you keep walking forward, trying to get closer to him, drawing nearer and nearer to his figure until the deep red eyes are lit aflame with wrath and the man has turned into his own true form, wings and horns sprouting in an attempt to intimidate you.

"Get out," He seethes, hands clenched into fists.

But all you do is reach forward for his hand.

"Stop!" He shouts, angling his body away in a desperate attempt to stop you from touching. "Don't you see?" He roars. "Your wings—they're already turning black!"

But you don't care about that anymore. With that single comment, you remember—you have wings—and all it takes is one flap for them to send you flying forward, wrapping your arms tightly around Lucifer as he breaks your fall.

The two of you collapse on the ground on in a tangle of limbs and feathers, Lucifer continuing to try to push you off of him when all your efforts are directed towards holding onto the demon as tight as you can.

"Your wings," He chokes out, watching as the feathers change colors before his very eyes. It was different before, when one of you were always masking your true appearance with your human form. But now that you're both in your natural states?

There's nothing to obstruct the flow of magic as it flows through your bodies, out of your bodies and into each other. You can feel Lucifer's darkness pumping through your veins, tainting everything from your wings to your halo black with his aura.

"I'm ruining you," He hisses, still trying to shrink away.

"I don't care," You whisper, burying your neck in his shoulder. You hold him tighter when he finally gives up on pushing you off, allowing you to cling to him as closely as you want. "I...I thought my wings were turning black because I was turning into a monster. But if I'm not changing, if this is just my body absorbing your light—then I don't care, Lucifer. I don't want to leave you."

"You're a fool," He spits, ignoring the way you laugh his words off. "You're an angel. You—you don't belong here. Go back to Simeon and Luke. Their light is still pure."

"And then what?" You ask, pulling back so that you can look Lucifer in the eye. You hate the troubled gaze, the raw anguish that spreads across his face as he glances behind you to stare at your wings. From your peripheral vision, you can already see the blackness spreading, but you're true to your words.

You don't care.

"I'm surrounded by demons. If I don't absorb your light, then my wings will turn black because of them, all the same."

"MC," Lucifer chuckles mirthlessly. "None of these other demons were born to be harbingers of light. You forget, I'm the Morningstar. The energy I give off is enough to throw an entire realm out of balance. Other demons can't sully your purity, but I...I defile you with my mere presence."

You're quiet, still holding Lucifer tightly as you remain collapsed on top of him. His hands still rest on the floor, unwilling to taint you with his touch any more than is necessary, but you can see the way his fingers twitch.

He wants to hold you the way you're holding him.

"What if I'm okay with that?" You whisper, gazing hesitantly into Lucifer's eyes. They widen briefly before he masks the surprise.

"You're too much of an angel, MC." He glances away, and this time, you notice the way his throat bobs as he swallows thickly. "You do not understand the meaning of your words. A demon hears them differently."

"What if I do?" You repeat, gently cupping Lucifer's cheek and bringing his gaze back to you. "What if I do understand what I'm saying?"

"You do not." You cannot, he means. Lucifer hasn't been in the Celestial Realm for four thousand years. He doesn't know that angels are no longer the sort of beings to innocently go about, unaware of the effect they have on others. Eons ago, you may not have understood the loaded connotation behind everything you're telling the man. But now?

You know exactly what your words mean.

"You're wrong, Lucifer. I know what I'm saying." You let your head lower, bowing low until your lips are mere inches away from Lucifer. You gaze at his lips, making sure he can see the way you're looking at them before you finally lift your eyes to his own. "I'm okay with being corrupted, Lucifer. As long as it's you."

"You…" His voice shifts, the demonic urges he's been trying so long to resist finally surfacing at your words. You can't be any clearer than that, and the demon finally understands that his feelings aren't one-sided. That you don't look at him as a mere brother. That you want this as much as he does. "You don't know what you're asking for," He whispers, but now his own eyes are locked onto the plumpness of your lips, unable to look away.

"Then show me," You whisper.

That's all it takes for the last of his restraint to vanish, the palms that were once pressed against the floor lifting to hold you close as he captures your lips with his own, connecting your bodies in the most intimate way either of you have ever known.

You can feel everything in him, as your lips meet.

The beating of his heart, growing faster when you wrap your arms around his neck.

The tensing of his shoulders as he shifts upward, sitting up and pulling you onto his lap, ever closer to him.

The rhythmic pulse of his light as it floods into you—and despite having your eyes closed, you know that the edges of your wings have turned fully black, filled to the brim with the essence of the Lucifer.

As your body continues to absorb the waves of light and power radiating off his body, you feel your back burst with power, the Celestial cloak you had on breaking and being ripped off your shoulders as your wings spread even wider, shining the richest shade of black you've ever seen.

"Your wings," He mutters against your lips, leaning his forehead against yours as he slides a hand onto your cheek, rubbing soft circles into the skin. "I've corrupted them."

"No," You murmur, smiling softly. For the first time, you don't hate the ebony color of the feathers, smiling as you gaze upon them. "They're beautiful." You let them flap, entranced. Your eyes dart between your wings and his, pulling his body closer until your wings are touching. "They match with yours."

They match with yours.

Those had been your first words of surprise when Lucifer showed you your reflection in a mirror, on your second day alive in the Celestial Realm. You'd spent nearly every waking moment gazing at the six glorious wings on Lucifer's back, vaguely aware that you had feathers to match but never realizing that yours were just as beautiful.

You slide your hand down to Lucifer's, beaming at him as you intertwine your fingers in his. At last, the two of you are matching once more—no longer separated by the visual differences of angel and demon.

"Are you certain you want this, MC?" He asks. He brings a hand to your hair, a gesture of comfort that he doesn't forget even in the heat of this passion. "I don't want you to feel pressured to do anything with me. It's not too late to take back what you've said."

But you shake your head, an assured smile appearing on your lips.

"I told you, didn't I?" You ask, a light giggle slipping out. "I'm okay with being corrupted, as long as it's you."

And this time, you don't just mean your wings. You're truly okay with every demonic thought flitting through Lucifer's mind as he stares at you, mouth agape in awe of your sweet confidence. 

He chuckles, wrapping his arms around your waist, pressing a kiss to your jaw.

For the moment, he doesn't even need any of that. You've given him permission, but all he wants is to continue locking your lips with his own, kissing you over and over again until you're both lost in the sensation of each other.

He can feel you pulling on his light, reveling in it the way he's basking in your affection. It's a feeling so blissful only an angel as perfect as you could ever give him such a sensation, and Lucifer feels that there's nothing he needs from the world but you.

Perfection.

For the first time, you're both perfectly in sync, giving in to the emotions that have been hidden in your heart for millennia. It matters not that your wings are black, that your halo is shrouded in shadow, that you're both making out on the floor, of all places.

If anything, it feels like all those little things are what has made this moment so infinitely perfect: like the stars have finally aligned, and nothing can pull you apart now.

MASTERLIST

Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3 | Chapter 4 | Chapter 5 | Chapter 6 | Chapter 7 | Chapter 8 | Chapter 9 | ✔

Word count: 4.0k

Notes: I was on my run this morning and i saw a deer and i just casually glanced behind me and it was just like. really ominously walking in my direction >.> i screamed and began sprinting away (like holy SHIT i did not know i still had that energy in me, i had already run like 2 miles and i was p tired but that was wild). anyway, looking back, i dont think the deer was actually walking toward me i think it just happened to be vaguely coming in my direction, but still that gave me heart palpitations wow im still a mess over it

Comment & Like

Next Update: 6/02/20

I do not own the rights to Obey Me! or any of the characters within it.

[frostsinth]

Royal Flush - Pt. 6

Part 1|2|3|4|5 - MasterList - Art - Art - Art - Art - Art

Shit, it’s already part 6??!! Ok, so this update is REALLY long, but I assumed you guys wouldn’t mind. I hope you will enjoy the dynamics bewteen the characters I tried to play on here.

I’m already working on the next chapter, which will be a bit juicier. And there will probably be more art, since I love drawing these two, so be sure to keep an eye out for both!

If you like this story, check out my others on my MasterList above. Feel free to BuyMeACoffee while you are there. As always, drop me a ask/comment/reblog if you have any questions or thoughts! I always love to hear back from you guys.

“Well…” Damjan wheezed breathlessly, then hoisted himself up into a sitting position, “It seems you are in peak form today,” He looked up at me from where I had just laid him low, giving me a lopsided grin, “I’m guessing you and the King worked things out then, Your Highness?”

I offered him a hand sheepishly. “Apologies, General,” I replied as I hauled him back to his feet, which took the majority of my strength, “I hope I caused no injury nor insult.”

“Bah!” He grunted, releasing my hand and slapping his own down the front of his trousers to release the worst of the dirt. “I’d be a rotten wassa indeed if I let a fancypants shiba Prince keep me down.”

I considered the strange words only briefly before he forced me back into my defensive stance with a soft lunge. It didn’t surprise me; the half-goblin General always seemed to be poised to strike. More than once he had caught me off guard. But I was a fast learner, and he gave me a toothy grin in acknowledgement of my successful block. I nodded, and he executed another series of attacks that had me dancing back on my toes. For his size, Damjan was very quick. I was less attentive to the spar, however, and more so to his constant peppering of goblinese into our conversation. It was certainly a change from our previous meetings.

“Well, Your Highness?” He called as he dodged my returning attack, sending me shooting past him and spinning on heel to prepare for the next onslaught, “Did you two manage to reconcile your differences after all? And keep your knees up!”

I raised the edge of one eyebrow at him, side stepping his feint and landing a solid blow on his shoulder. “My apologies again, General,” I shot back, hiding a blush as I loosened my stance to circle around his outside, “But I don’t believe that is any of your business.”

“On the contrary.” He argued, lobbing two heavy blows towards my middle. I dodged one, deflected the other, taking a skimming hit for my efforts. “As the General of his Armed Forces, I am responsible for protecting him from attacks-” He caught my swinging fist in his, yanking me towards him “-Whatever form it may take.”

I gritted my teeth, rolling my hand free and spinning to launch my elbow up towards his chin. I knew what he was doing. Just like his seemingly random attacks, Damjan used constant verbal assaults as well. Anything to give him an edge. Generally I could tune out his taunts. But he seemed to have found my weak spot, and I couldn’t help lingering on his comment. He dodged my elbow effectively, laughing and dropping low to swing a leg out at my feet. I leapt up and kicked out, sacrificing a balanced landing for a hard hit that had Damjan falling back a few steps. I staggered, breathless, but had time to fix my grounding as he righted himself and squared me up. We paced around each other.

“I haven’t seen him yet today;” he began, my only warning before he charged in. A flurry of blows followed before he and I found ourselves grappling in close quarters for the upper hand. “So tell me, Your Highness... was he still asleep when you left him this morning?”

My focus slipped in my absolute bewilderment of his implication, and just like that, I found myself flat on my back. Jaw dropped open, eyes wide and staring at the blue mountain sky overhead. Damjan’s loud guffaw rippled through the air, and I jumped when his face appeared in my line of sight. He placed his hands on his knees, bending over me and cocking his head to the side.

“Don’t let anyone in your head if you don’t want them there, Your Highness.” He advised. His big, grey-green hand came down, grabbing my shoulder and yanking me back up. “Not everyone will use their advantage quite so charmingly as I.”

I scrambled to get my feet beneath me properly, blushing furiously. And hot with anger at such an intensely personal attack. I didn’t wait for him to ready himself, shamefully knocking off two quick blows before I had even regained my own solid footing. Damjan slapped both aside easily. One quick feint and sweep later, and I was staring slack jawed at the blue sky again.

“Don’t let them ruffle your feathers either.” He suggested, smirking down at me knowingly. He tapped his temple. “You can’t think straight if your head’s burning too hot.”

It took me an extra moment until the wind returned to my lungs, and I gasped. The General helped me up more delicately, patting my back helpfully as I sputtered.

“How.. How dare-” I gasped, trying to form the words at the same time I tried to regain my breath. I pushed away his hand.

He raised his palms, patting the air soothingly. “Apologies, Your Highness. I know that humans are not so comfortable with intimacy as goblins.” His ears flopped as he tilted his head to the side to consider me as I shifted my stance warily. “But I would be a poor teacher indeed if I didn’t try to prepare you.”

My lungs finally having resumed their normal function of breathing, I straightened slowly. Considering him with a stony glare while rubbing at an errant rib. He grinned sheepishly in the face of my look, raising his palms again.

“... Prepare me for what?”

“The Goblin Court.” His toothy grin widened. “There isn’t a goblin alive who doesn’t love to mess with anyone they can. And you will be the main target, as not only our future King, but also a shiba Prince.”

“Shiba?” I echoed dumbly, staring at him. It was not the first time he had used that word in reference to me.

“Human.” He translated, then placed his hand on his hip. “Seems I’m going to have to teach you a little goblinese as well.”

“Hibik is already finding an instructor for me.” I shot back defensively, wiping my hands together.

The General scoffed. “Yeah, and they’ll teach you real good book goblinese. But what about when one of those creampuffs at court calls you a baka lo minsa? Or mumbles diavrit? Hmmm? How much faith do you have in a little eincha from the academy teaching you proper goblinese vulgarities?”

My mouth opened and closed slowly, and I blinked at him again. “I… I don’t think-”

He shook his head. “The Goblin Royal Court  is more ruthless than any battlefield. They think it's all in good fun, but I doubt you’d much enjoy it, Your Highness.” His grin returned, and he walked over to pat me on the back good naturedly. “Tell you what, we can trade! You teach me some good human curses, and I’ll teach you the goblin ones.”

I felt my face flush even hotter, and he laughed amiably. “... May I ask, General,” I started, rubbing at the back of my neck as he started walking over to the wall of the ring, “.... Why are you…ah..” ‘Helping’ seemed like the wrong word to use, based upon my sore back and ego. So I let the question hang without definition.

He grinned, picking up his towel and dabbing at the sweat across his chest. “You are a member of the Royal Family now, Your Highness,” He explained, “Which means you’re under my protection too.” He tossed me my own towel, his grin growing. “So don’t make me work too hard.”

The notion he proposed… being a part of their Royal Family. It set my stomach into an acrobatic routine. It was a concept I hadn’t fully realized yet, despite everything else. That not just my living situation was changing, but my family was changing. Into a completely new world with its own dynamic and history that I had no part in until this very week... I stared numbly at the towel in my hands for a moment before I wiped down my own torso. A breath later I grabbed my tunic and slipped on my boots then followed Damjan back into the castle. My spine itched with nerves now that the spar was over, and I peeked nervously down the dark halls. He cast a glance at me out the corner of his eyes, lips still twitching.

“‘Baka lo minsa’ means something like… brainless, uncultured fool. But much cruder.” He explained, despite the fact I hadn’t asked. “And ‘diavrit’ is… well, literally it means to defecate, though it's more specific as to the manner of defecation.”

I cleared my throat, nearly stumbling over the carpeted hallway. Damjan laughed, wringing his towel in his hands. “I’m not sure this is appropriate-”

“Goblins don’t care.” The General interrupted. “Appropriate, inappropriate. Those words just have less sway with us. There is nothing off the table when it comes to an interaction; whatever you can use to gain the upper hand, you use.” He steered us up towards my tower rooms. “Proper einchak like Hibik may prefer what you would call a more “appropriate” attack, but even they aren’t above calling out your mother’s sexual partners, or your own natural bodily functions. Or standing uncomfortably close. The game, you see, is to do it eloquently. To attack your companion, set them off balance, gain the upper hand, and to do so with a delicate, poetic flourish.”

My head was spinning and I wasn’t sure if it was my heartbeat or footsteps echoing in my ears. I swallowed hard, checking the edges of my mask to make sure I had maintained it throughout our conversation. It seemed by some miracle I had; I wondered if it was enough.

“I appreciate your… candor, General,” I replied finally, feeling secure and confident in my form, and he turned to face me as we reached the door to my rooms, “However, I do not require such vulgarities to ‘gain the upper hand’ as you say.”

He nodded, crossing his arms over his still bare chest and leaning against the wall. “Fair enough, Your Highness.” He agreed. “I have no doubt you are clever enough to outwit anyone, human or goblin. But even if you do not need to use such topics or language, you should still find a comfort and familiarity with them.” His big head dipped to the side. “In order to maintain your composure under heavy fire… Which will include hearing talk of your sexual relationship with the King.”

I nearly cracked my jaw with how hard I clenched it, and I was certain my mask slipped a little. I stammered something uselessly incoherent, and felt my face flush even darker. I pulled at the hem of my newly donned tunic and shuffled slightly, glancing around. Thankfully, we seemed to be alone. I quickly considered a range of different methods of excusing myself from the conversation and ducking into my chambers.

“We are very comfortable talking about sex.” Damjan interjected before I could find the right method. “It is certainly not taboo to discuss our lovers and antics. I myself am currently entangled with a delightful woman… and sometimes her brother instead.” He grinned. “Goblins are very open and accepting of all things of such a nature. The King’s previous partners are well known, and such discussion is commonplace amid the court.” He looked me up and down. “They will expect you to be equally open, and if they find you are unsettled by it, they will never let it go unaddressed.”

I swallowed hard, giving him a curt nod and fixing my stance. “Thank you for the advice General,” I told him, then quickly continued as he opened his mouth as if to add more, “I do apologize, but I must take my leave. I have to prepare for the rest of my day. Until tomorrow then.”

I barely gave him a chance to formally nod and offer a farewell before I ducked into my chambers. I wasn’t able to completely ignore the amused smile on his lips, and his words lingered in my mind even as I closed the door heavily behind me.

By the Gods and all that was holy. I leaned against the wall next to the door and slowly sank to the floor, cupping my head in my hands. Trying to calm my racing heart. How was I supposed to be comfortable speaking about such vulgar and intimate topics when the mere thought of them made me break down into an incoherent mess?! I didn’t even know how I felt about the King, or where our private relationship was headed. Yet I should expect everyone ELSE to be constantly discussing it around me??

I groaned, letting my head fall back and hit the wall. Of course, obviously the general consensus for any level headed person was that we were to be married; which implied there would be some form of… intimacy… My head throbbed with the amount of blood rushing through it, and I tugged at my collar. My mouth went dry at the thought, but I couldn’t help but wonder about… such things. Especially what Damjan had said about Grier’s previous partners… Exactly how many were we talking about?? Not that it mattered, I reminded myself. We had only known each other for a week, and he was a King after all. Young, handsome… virile. I certainly had not shared my own romantic history with him (not that there was much of a history to share), and I found myself surprised to be pleasantly comforted by the fact that at least one of us would know what we were doing in… that department. It sent a chilly rush down my spine as I wondered what Grier himself expected for such matters of physical intimacy. My fingers came up to my lips of their own accord, and I felt the tingling ghost of his hand at my cheek. Certainly I had… enjoyed our interactions so far… I shifted, not unfamiliar with my body’s response to his advances, but never having needed to really assess such things before. I had only ever been able to… By the Gods, I couldn’t even think about my own intimate exploits in a coherent sentence. I had no words, no real thoughts I could describe it with. I settled for images. Memories of the one time I had slipped up, and let my emotions get ahead of my sound reasoning. It filled me with heat, and my breath became shallow.

There was also the lingering guilt, the stab of regret. Painfully twisting cruel fingers into my heart. I sighed again, rubbing my hand over the top of my head. This was not going to be easy. I gritted my teeth, then forced myself to my feet. I didn’t have time to linger on such things though. I was due to meet the Dowager Queen soon. And found it less daunting that she was a notoriously sharp witted and harsh Goblin Monarch than the fact that she was Grier’s mother… I swallowed painfully and headed over to the bathing room.

I wasn’t sure exactly when the introductions would happen, and wanted to be prepared as best I was able. Damjan had given me a little insight into the former Queen, mostly regarding her reputation as an indomitable force. But he had been frustratingly unhelpful in advice on meeting her myself. He had merely grinned and said something along the lines of ‘that’s a personal matter between you and Grier’. I kicked the soiled towel aside from where I had dropped it on the floor, scowling. So our personal intimate life was up for discussion, but not what I was supposed to do when meeting my intended’s mother? Hardly seemed fair.

I was scrubbed and polished clean by the time a light knock came on the door nearly an hour later, and I rushed to pull the fresh tunic over my head. My wardrobe options were becoming painfully repetitive; soon all my things would be soiled beyond respectable use. I wondered how to brooch the topic with Grier, which conjured a horrible image of myself in bright, lavish colors with ridiculous necklines, streaming lace and frills and… Perhaps I could send for my own things instead. Though I dreaded composing that letter almost as much.

A different goblin than the one on my mind stood at the door, and he bowed his head respectfully as I opened my chambers. Beside him was a silver cart filled to nearly unbalancing it with covered plates and bowls. I considered him briefly; I was certain it was the same goblin whom had been attending me since my arrival. Bringing my food the previous days, and walking with me and Hibik to the gardens the evening before those.

“The King has sent word that he will call upon you shortly,” He began, his voice quiet, “And requested your shared breakfast be sent ahead. If Your Highness would permit me?”

I nodded quickly, stepping aside to allow him into the chambers. “Of course, thank you.”

The goblin bounded lightly at my words, a small smile coming to his large lips. He barely came to my navel, and had dark curls that fell about his copper eyes as he moved despite an obvious attempt to keep them out of his face with some sort of grease and a hair thong. I followed him as he pushed the cart in, bringing it to the bed chambers where he had set the previous meals at the small table there.

I idled momentarily on the impropriety of dining in my private chambers, and felt a little flush to my cheeks at the thought. Certainly it was not commonplace, though I had heard that my father occasionally took counsel in his rooms when needs arose early in the morning… I assumed Grier had not given nearly so much thought to it as I was now, however, and didn’t want to be a bother about it. Perhaps it was not unheard of for goblins. It wouldn’t surprise me at any rate, given what I had seen of them thus far. I distracted myself by considering the dark haired goblin again.

“I apologize for my rudeness,” I told him as he began to set out the dishes, “I never requested your name. Might I have it now?”

He gave me a small grin, averting his eyes politely. “It is Seoc, Your Highness. I have been assigned as your personal attendant. In whatever capacity you have need of me.”

“It is a pleasure to meet you,” I replied graciously, “I beg your forgiveness for not having made an effort to do so sooner.”

Seoc bowed lightly, a small smile on his lips, having finished setting the dishes out on the small table before the couch. “Quite understandable, Your Highness. It has been an eventful few days for you.” He cocked his head to the side. “Can I be of any further assistance at this time?”

I paused, if only momentarily, thinking back to my lack of attire, but then shook my head. “No, thank you, Seoc. I appreciate your time.”

He grinned, nodding respectfully. “I will be within ear shot, should you think of anything, Your Highness. Please do not hesitate to call.”

Just as he bobbed out, Grier strode in through the open door, and I had to work hard to keep from starting at the sight of him. Not only because of his sudden, light footed and casual entrance into my private chambers, but also due to his overall appearance. He wore a tight emerald vest with yellow embroidery over a billowous, fluffy cream colored shirt that spilled out the edges of the vest as if unable to be contained and ballooned at the sleeves. His pants were a dark grey, and were equally tight all the way up to his navel with large gold buttons the size of his palm along the midseam. The vest reached just past the top of his trousers, but the cream colored shirt spilled out the back like a puffy tail. His hair seemed particularly wild, and he had a scowl set onto his lips. Hibik trailed behind him, babbling something and scrambling to keep the parchment in his arms from dropping.

“The sun has only been up for a few hours, Hibik,” The King grumbled, waving his secretary into silence, “Allow me time to fully come to my senses before you test them.”

I tucked my hands behind my back, squaring my shoulders and swallowing my nerves as the goblin turned to face me. “Good morning, Your Majesty.” I greeted him, though felt a tingle of unease that threatened to burst into a fully formed tension.

His scarlet eyes considered me, and he sighed heavily. “Don’t start with that again.”

“I’m afraid I do not know what-”

He waved his hand again, cutting me off. I pursed my lips as he turned to his secretary. “Another hour’s peace, Hibik, at least. Let me have some coffee, and hopefully some pleasant company. I trust your judgement on these things.”

Hibik nodded, bobbing nervously. “Of course, my King.”

Grier turned back to me as the other goblin darted out, closing the door behind him. “Did you sleep well?”

I blinked momentarily, confused by his switch. Eventually I nodded, though slowly. “... I did, thank you.” I noticed him looking about, the small scowl on his lips seeming to deepen. “Ah… did you as well, Your-”

“I will scream.” He threatened me curtly, narrowing his scarlet eyes. I clamped my mouth shut, my eyes widening slightly. Grier gave another deep sigh, shaking his head.

He strode to the bedroom without waiting for my invitation. I stiffened at that, but followed behind quietly. Again, I saw him look about, placing his hands on his hips. His brow scrunched, yet he said nothing, plopping down on the couch with a huff. My tongue itched to speak out against that, and I felt a tingling of insult at his behavior. But I settled into practiced temperance and withheld my comments. I reminded myself that it was likely just a simple misunderstanding… After all, I was his guest, and his future spouse. Perhaps it was not rude to assume such casual familiarity. I saw his nose twitch, and he looked over the plates and dishes before reaching for a decanter and cup. I too could smell the thick aroma of the hot brown liquid as he poured himself a serving. What had he called it? Yes, that’s right, coffee-

“HIBIK!” He shouted loudly, and I jumped in surprise.

There was a clatter and a crash from the hallway beyond the foyer. Then the small man quickly darted in, bowing repeatedly. I stared at him, a little taken aback.

“Y-yes my King?”

Grier waved his hand about. “Do I even have to say?”

“Ah, no, my King… Apologies I-”

“Who is his attendant again?” The King leaned back, his brow dark and his scowl somehow even deeper.

“Ah, that.. That would be-” Hibik scrambled through the parchment in his hands.

“Seoc.” I informed him, my voice a little tight. Both goblins froze, staring at me with surprise. As if they had forgotten I was there for a moment. I considered them both. “Is something wrong?”

Grier made a soft ‘tch’ with his mouth, sipping at his coffee slowly. Hibik glanced at him, then offered me a polite bow. “My fervent apologies, Your Highness, for the state of your rooms. I had intended to send up a designer for your consult as we discussed, but there was a delay in procuring the usual Royal decorators.”

I tried to puzzle together the implications of his response, but found I could not fathom what had them both in such a tizzy. “No apologies necessary, Lord Hibik-”

“It is unacceptable!” Snapped Grier, interrupting me. I felt my own temper flare, and clenched my jaw. “You, a Royal guest who is also my betrothed, to be treated so shamefully. No wonder you would think us uncivilized.” He started to turn back to Hibik. “No further delays. I want these rooms properly furnished before-”

“I beg your pardon, Your Majesty,” I interjected, a little louder than I had intended, taking a bold step closer, “But I will remind you that you have given me these rooms to do with ‘as I wish’, and as such, I will not be accepting any additional furnishings or decor at this time.”

The sharpness in my voice had him falling silent, and his slender brows shot up. Hibik glanced nervously between the two of us. I waited a breath, holding the goblin King’s scarlet eyes.

“... You mean, you like your chambers like-?”

“Lord Hibik, thank you, but we will not require your services at this time. You may go. I am sure you already have enough to keep you busy.” I informed him, ignoring Grier for a moment. I heard him begin to sputter behind me, but nodded to the smaller goblin who hesitated for a moment with a glance to the King before bowing and making his exit.

“You would dismiss my secretary-”

“Apologies, Your Majesty,” I interrupted him again as he had me, turning to face him properly, “However, if this is not to your satisfaction, I am certain as King you have numerous options available for where you may take your breakfast. I will not keep you from them.”

“Are you… kicking me out?” He sounded both equally astonished and perhaps arrogantly bemused that I would dare order anything of him at all. Perhaps he was not used to be refused so pointedly. Or eloquently.

I stiffened, squaring my jaw and considering him. “I would hate for Your Majesty to be uncomfortable. If you feel the setting is not to your standards, you are welcome to leave it.”

Again, he fell silent. Staring at me in unsuppressed surprise. Part of me hoped he would leave. I had never seen him so rude and demanding. It was off putting and I did not enjoy it in the least, and it left a bitter anger rolling in my gut. Was this the real Grier, I wondered? Had the rest been some act? The other part of me hoped there was some rational explanation… certainly he had shown his emotional range in such a manner before, but this time seemed wholly unprovoked. I held his gaze, unwavering in my stubbornness. Pitting my will against his. Finally, he broke the stalemate by slowly raising his cup to his lips and taking a careful sip. I wasn’t sure how he managed to make even that look arrogant. I continued to wait, my anger still twisting in my gut, hands still clasped behind my back.

“... Forgive me,” He grumbled, leaning back and taking another deep sip, “I am told I am not a ‘morning person’... I would like to stay, if that’s alright.” A small smirk played across his lips. “Though I have to say… I rather like this authoritative side of you.”

I felt my face flush, and just like that the bastard gained the upper hand again. His grin grew, and he patted the couch next to him. I paused, looking him up and down. Not entirely sure I was willing to forgive his earlier rudeness so easily. He finished off the last of his coffee and reached for the pot to refill his cup, flipping over another as he did and filling it as well. Slowly, I moved over. He held out the cup as humbly as he could manage, and I took his peace offering warily, sitting down at the opposite arm of the couch

“... I am often… less than courteous before noon.” He told me conversationally. “But I am sorry if I came off as… ah…” I checked on him out of the corner of my eye. “... More of an ass than usual, yes?”

“I believe Lord Hibik received the brunt of your ‘morning person’.” I replied lightly, keeping my tone as formal as possible and still not looking at him directly.

Grier sighed again, wincing. “Yes… I shall have to apologize to him… Though I fear he is far too accustomed to my morning antics.” He gave me a tiny, mischievous grin. “Despite the circumstances surrounding it... It is nice to see you speaking out… If I can otherwise encourage you to speak your mind, I will hasten to do so.”

I took a sip of the coffee in my hands, dropping my gaze. Silence spread between us for a long moment, and I felt my ears burn as it gave me time to remember the last time I had seen the King. More specifically, how his lips had tasted against mine. What did he expect of this interaction? I recalled the way he had so casually sauntered into my rooms, without asking my leave. For that matter, what did I expect? I was suddenly painfully aware of the proximity of my bed to us, and the invitation I had proposed to him last night. As well as how it could have been taken... I wondered if by goblin standards, that invitation had carried over until today. I swallowed my nervousness with another sip as he straightened, reaching out and plucking up what looked to be some strange baked treat from the trays in front of us. I saw his eyes skim about the room again as he leaned back and took a small bite.

“You really like your rooms like this?” I followed his eyes, considering the mostly bare room. I hesitated, chewing over an appropriate response. “Speak your mind, yes?” He reminded me. “You most of all should always be free to do so.”

I looked down into my cup, quiet for a moment longer. “... They are sufficient.”

“They are boring.” He mused, taking another bite of his pastry. “I know you said the rest of the castle was too loud, but surely you’d at least like some more furniture?”

I rolled my thumb along the edge of my cup before taking a slow sip, casting my eye around the room. The large four poster bed, the fireplace. The simple couch and small table. The bare walls and floors, devoid of personal effects and most color. It felt… strange. Empty and hollow, the shell of a real life. But somehow I found I preferred it this way. It felt… safe. A place to hide away and avoid facing the daunting spans of the rest of my life.

“... They are sufficient.” I repeated softly.

Grier plucked another of the baked treats from the tray and held it out to me. “It’s a bit early to dig for the emotional confession behind that answer. Can I perhaps tempt you with a goblin pastry instead?”

I almost smiled at his teasing, but lightly took the roll from his hand. He made sure our fingers brushed and I glanced at his eyes as they did. I pretended the heat wasn’t returning to my face, bringing the roll to my nose for an experimental sniff before taking a bite.

The dough was warm and flaky, and the inside was filled with some sort of ground meat. There was a burst of flavor, spicy and tart, quickly overlaid by the buttery softness of the dough. My eyes widened slightly in surprise, and I chewed thoughtfully. Very aware of his scarlet eyes watching me carefully.

“They are called uyapi,” He told me, turning to pick up another one for himself, “The outside dough is universal, but the fillings change depending on the meal and occasion. For breakfast, usually the goblin equivalent of sausage.” 

He bared his sharp pointy teeth as he spread his jaw as wide as it would go to fit the entire roll in his mouth in one oversized bite. I observed him in bewilderment as he chewed, his cheeks ballooned out almost comically.

I took a more delicate bite of the remainder of mine, nodding slightly. “It is good.” I told him quietly.

He swallowed the last of his. “The nice thing about them is they have a bit of everything, so are almost like a small meal in every bite.” He noted. “There’s meat, diced vegetables, and often cheese as well as the dough.” I watched as he brought his long fingers to his mouth, licking each one slowly.

My mouth went dry at the sight of his long tongue, and I quickly looked for something else to occupy my thoughts. Even as my face grew hot. I took a deep sip of the coffee before placing the cup back on the small table, straightening a little in my seat. I finished the last of the pastry and reached for another.

“I will be trying to spend as much time with you as possible,” He told me, unaware of my internal struggle and leaning back with a third cup of coffee, “To hopefully… ease the transition. I hope you don’t mind.”

I shook my head slowly, swallowing the last of the uyapi and reaching for my drink again. “It sounds like the appropriate course of action… given our circumstances.”

His thin lips spread in a wide smile, and he cocked his head to the side as I took a slow sip. “Our circumstances, hm? You mean how I have already fallen hopelessly head over heels for you while I can only assume that even if you did feel the same way, you wouldn’t even know?”

I sputtered into my coffee, my face burning hotter than my drink. I coughed to clear my airway, placing the cup back on the table. I saw his grin grow, but his eyes were soft. I watched him out the corner of my eye as I dabbed a napkin at my mouth and chin. There was a warmth in the edges of his ruby reds, an echo of what I had seen the day before. I swallowed hard, my head spinning, and stared down at the napkin in my hands.

“.... Forgive me yet again… You are just always so serious and proper,” He swirled his coffee, considering me with a tiny smirk, “It is amusing to see you all flustered, knowing that I put you there.”

I remembered what Damjan had said about the Royal Court, and squared my jaw. Taking a steadying breath and relaxing my features to the best of my ability. I couldn’t help a glance at him again, and noticed him place his half finished drink on the table by mine. I felt the cushion beneath us shift as he slid a little closer.

“.... Not to mention you look very cute when you are surprised.”’

I slid as far away as I could manage, blinking rapidly. “I-I do not like to be.” I stammered, my lips feeling numb and mostly useless. “I prefer to always have control.”

His grin grew, and I felt my flush deepen, wondering what hidden meaning he had taken from my response. “Noted.” He pushed his hair back out of his face. “However, as I was saying, it would make things easier for you to accompany me as I complete my regular duties. Then not only could we become more… accustomed to each other’s presence and preferences, you would also be able to become more familiar with goblin society.” He cocked his head to the side. “You would be a greater boon as a husband if you were able to help me govern my people. Though I would also relish simply keeping you as a trophy in my chambers as well. You are certainly handsome enough-”

“I have spent my life training in royal duties and assisting the Crown Prince,” I interrupted him quickly, and ignoring the flash of his sharp teeth as he smiled again, “I would be pleased to utilize those skills and obtain new ones in the aid of your people.”

“Our people.” He corrected, sounding amused. “Soon enough, at least. And I suspected you might not be the type to sit idly by. However, I believe this might be easier accomplished if you might permit me to cast the charm on your eyes we discussed.” His smile faded, and one long finger came up to tap his pointed chin. “Though perhaps not today, as you wished to better understand the magic before it was cast upon you. I can procure a book I am certain, though it may take a few days to find one in common or have one translated.”

“I-I…” I stopped as soon as my words stammered out, and swallowed hard. Grier looked back at me, curious. “If… If you think it would be best,” I started again, then reached up to rub at the back of my neck, “I… I would trust your judgement and… and you.”

Now it was his turn to look surprised, and I looked at him through my dark lashes. He stayed silent for a moment, then the warmth returned to his eyes. “... You would trust me?” I nodded shyly. “... I don’t mind waiting. Your request is quite reasonable-”

“I trust you.” I spoke the words softly, timid and sheepish. But their honesty was undeniable to either of us, and I felt him shift slightly in his seat even as those words settled deep into my chest. It was odd to admit… but I did trust him.

“... I’ll have to touch you.” He explained, lifting his hands with his palms out as if to illustrate his meaning. 

I nodded my consent, and he continued, sliding closer. Reaching up and gently cupping my face with his fingers on my temples and his palms against my cheeks. I bowed my shoulders and leaned a little lower so he could reach me more easily. I felt him skim his thumbs against my eyelashes, and blinked instinctually. His touch was light, but his skin was warm. My head swam as soon as it touched mine, and I almost missed his next words as my heart thundered in my ears.

“This won’t hurt,” He assured me gently, “But it will feel a bit strange… Try not to move.”

I nodded again, my movement slightly impeded by his hands. I saw him stiffen slightly. Noticed his eyes flick down to my lips. I wasn’t entirely sure if my heart had stopped, but I was pretty positive my breathing had. And he hadn’t even started the spell yet. He cleared his throat lightly, then closed those startling ruby reds. Freeing me to look down at his own lips without scrutiny. I watched them begin to move slowly, and could almost see them tracing the sounds out in the air with each syllable. The words he spoke were entirely foreign to me, but I felt a strange tingling sensation at his fingertips against my temples. It spread, like cool, trickling water, or hundreds of tiny little pine needles. It didn’t hurt, as he had promised, and as it reached my eyes his thumbs moved. I closed my eyes, felt him trace his thumbs over the lids. Still murmuring softly. It was warm then, like I was looking at the sun through my eyelids. It seemed to seep back, deeper than my eyes, and I let out a little breath as his thumbs moved away and the sensations faded with his voice.

I knew the shape of his mouth now, as it brushed against my own. I drew back in the breath I had released silently, but otherwise didn’t move. I kept my eyes closed as he gently trailed his lips along mine. It was brief, just a feather light kiss. Yet still my head spun like a top and it took me more than a single breathing cycle to let my eyes flutter back open after he leaned back.

He was watching me, his hands lingering on my face. I adjusted my tongue in my mouth, studying those scarlet eyes of his. “... Was that part of the spell?”

“No.” He admitted sheepishly. “I just... couldn’t resist the temptation.”

“...Well… you’d make a terrible monk...” I mumbled.

He laughed, running his thumb across my cheekbone. I flushed hotter at his delighted smile, and after another moment deigned to straighten. Slowly pulling my face out of his hands. He shook his head, still grinning like a fool.

“Obviously you are a morning person.” He said, bemused. “All quick witted and reserved… how long have you been up?”

“Since dawn.” I replied, looking around the room curiously. But nothing seemed to look different.

“An ungodly hour.” Grier grumbled, shaking his head, then his voice became tender. “Though, perhaps you could convert me to… What are you doing?”

I jumped from my slow rotation of studying the bedchamber, turning back to him embarrassedly. “I-I was… Just seeing if…”

He smiled knowingly. “You won’t notice a difference in here. You could already see in this light before.” Then he stood, straightening his vest before looking down at me. “You can see if it works sufficiently in the halls on our way to my mother’s quarters. Come.”

I jumped up at his words, my heart skipping, then quickly tried to brush away my suddenness with a glance around. His smile quirked to one side, and I cleared my throat. Fixing my composure back into place. He gestured to the table, but I shook my head before he could ask. I certainly wasn’t going to be able to eat any more now.

“Relax.” He told me comfortingly as he led the way towards the foyer. “She doesn’t bite.” I tried to listen to him, burying my fretfulness and following him out into the hall. “... Not that hard, anyway.”

“Grier,” I let slip unintentionally and unable to completely keep the exasperation from my voice.

His laughter proceeded us down the hallway.

….

“Mother?” Grier called softly following his knock, cracking the door open and poking his head around. “Are you decent?”

A scoff came from the room beyond him, and I resisted the urge to shift nervously at his shoulder. “Am I ever, mo apawiwi?”

Grier sighed heavily, shaking his head. “I meant that I have brought a visitor, inana. May I bring him in?”

“Do as you like!” Came the hazardous voice, thin but still strong. “You are King, are you not?”

He groaned, shouldering the door open and walking in. He gestured for me to follow him, which I did. Though much more slowly and less languidly than he. I kept my spine stiff, my shoulders squared, with my hands tucked into the small of my back and my heart in my throat.

The room we entered was grandiose, with high ceilings and thick draping curtains around the walls. There were a great many items of furniture; here a desk, there an armoire. In the corner a long table with a shelf built along one end. Most in a dark, polished wood though occasionally a lighter pine sprinkled amid the others. And of course, each of these available surfaces was covered in items. Delicate and expensive looking bottles of what I imagined must be perfume. Gems and jewels, necklaces and earrings. Books and large hats. Maps and parchment, quills and inkwells, globes and strange models of things I had no name for. A few small stone busts or statues, some of stone, others of wood, still more of copper. I wasn’t sure where to place my focus, as each time I shifted it I found a million things to see. I found that my enchanted eyes were easily able to define the shapes of everything, down to minute details. But the colors, which I imagined were just as loud as in every other part of the castle, were subdued. For which I was grateful; the clutter alone was overwhelming, not to mention the heavy smell of old perfume and worn cotton.

The King led the way towards the center of the room, where a great chair with a high, plush back was set amid piles and piles of trinkets like a dragon’s hoard. It was perpendicular to the door, requiring us to walk around to the side to approach it head on. Which we did, and which also gave a pair of beady red eyes time to carefully run us over from head to toe.

The Dowager Queen was small, her thin shoulders hunched and bowed with age. I could see the distinct shape of her bones in her skinny arms as they extended to rest her thin hands on the head of an ornate cane that tapped the ground between her knobby knees. She wore a large dress, poofy and full of lace and frills, which enveloped her tiny form like a cloud, spilling over the arms of the chair and bunching at her little shoulders. Her nose was similar to Grier’s, though a little longer and more hooked at the end. She had the same eyes, the same brows, though her face was more rounded than his, and her ears, while wider around the middle, still curled back towards her face in the same way his did. It was impossible to say what color her hair had once been, as it was bleached as white as fresh snow, but looked equally as soft piled into a neat bun on the top of her head. She jingled like a bell from all the jewelry she was adorned with as she tilted her head, scarlet eyes studying me as I came around to her front. I stopped a respectable distance away, tucking my heels together and dipping my head politely.

“Mother, this is Prince Nikostratus.” Grier introduced me, going to his mother’s side and dropping to one knee by the arm of her chair. “Prince Nikostratus, allow me to introduce the Dowager Queen Morag.”

I bowed slightly at the waist, dropping my eyes respectfully. “Your Grace.”

My neck itched from the weight of her gaze on me, but I kept my head bowed for a long moment. Trying to deny the twitch in my fist clasped tightly behind my back. When I finally did straighten, her eyes followed me, and her head tilted to the other side.

“Khos kala ka, spaye halshalen shiba wa.” She intoned, considering me still.

I was incapable of hiding the  helpless flick of my eyes to Grier at her words. He seemed embarrassed, and rubbed at the back of his neck.

“Ah… She said-”

“If I had been speaking for his ears, I would have spoken in Common, apawi.” She snapped, then flicked her fingers. “Cuir om, my child. Who is this shiba? Why have you brought him?”

“Well, Mother, Prince Nikostratus is to be my husband.” He explained, and I could see the anxiousness plainly on his face as he shifted on his knees by her side. “We-”

“Kashta vol! What is this nonsense you speak?” She cut him off again, her voice louder, and he winced, opening his mouth just to have her wave her hand to silence him and turn to me. “Non, come closer, shibakin. You will answer, not this abhama who would try to lie to his ina, and let me see your eyes when you do.”

I did as bidden, though my heart thrummed loudly in my ears. I took a few steps towards her, maintaining a respectable distance. I shifted my stance, shrinking my body as much as possible without actually bending or crouching down and making an effort not to loom over her. She seemed to consider this, reaching up to run her long fingers along her chin. I met her eyes firmly, burying my nerves and fretfulness deep down. Etching my face into stone to hide whatever she might try to pry from me. I saw Grier wince again, but ignored him. I didn’t have time to focus on appeasing both goblins at the same time.

“Why do you marry my son?” She demanded, her Common thickly accented with the rolling syllables of goblinese but still clear to the ear.

“We broker a peace between our two kingdoms with our marriage.” I told her honestly.

“Shiba men do not enjoy shiba men.”

My jaw stiffened. “Not openly.”

“You are a Prince?” She pressed.

“Yes.”

“The firstborn?”

“Secondborn. I would not take the throne.” I replied.

“So you seek one.”

“No.”

“Then why marry a King?”

“To end a war.”

“Even though he is goblin?”

“Yes.”

“For whom do you end the war? Yourself? For renown?”

“No.”

“Then whom?”

“My sister. My people.”

“For shiba.”

“For shiba and goblin.”

“Not for your King.”

“... No.”

She fell silent for a moment after her rapid fire, steepling her fingers before her chin. Her eyes studied my face. I was careful to keep it blank, but firm. Certain and undeniable. I saw Grier’s eyes darting back and forth between us. Thought I saw him chewing his bottom lip. But I refused to look away from the diminutive goblin in front of me. She straightened, shifting in her seat. As relaxed as I was on edge, though I hoped my composure held well beneath her scrutiny.

“PAYE!” She shouted, and we both jumped. “Bring chairs for my guests.”

An attendant darted from the next room, quickly dragging over two chairs. I hastened to help them as soon as I saw them nearly buckle under the weight, and they offered me a grateful look. I was vehemently aware of the Queen’s eyes still following me, and noticed Grier nearly trip over himself as he stood and settled in the offered chair.

“When will you wed?” She demanded as I took my own seat.

“It will take time to plan, inana,” Grier explained, rubbing his hands over his knees, “Perhaps next spring-”

“Pah!” She scoffed, waving her hand at him. “I am old, mo apawi. I do not have such time to wait about. You!” She turned on me, pointing with one bony finger. “Shibakin. You will send for your mother. You learn the most about a boy from his mother.”

I stiffened, and felt my jaw clench a little tighter. I saw Grier open his mouth, looking a little pained, but I shook my head slightly. Catching his words before they left his mouth.

“I am afraid my mother passed when I was a teenager, Your Grace.” I told her myself, hoping my voice didn’t sound too thin.

She clicked her tongue, making a soft sound in her throat as she considered this. “You have a sister, yes?” I nodded. “Then you will bring her.”

“...She is nine.”

“All the better.” She scoffed. “Children are always honest.”

“Mother, I don’t think it’s the best-”

“PAH!” She shouted, silencing her son again. “You don’t think Grier. That is your greatest fault. You have no patience.” Her scarlet eyes flicked over to me. “How am I to know what kind of man this Prince is if I cannot speak to his family?”

“You could ask me.” I replied dryly. Then instantly clamped my mouth shut as her beady eyes narrowed. Internally I kicked myself. What had ever possessed me to-

“PAH!” She barked, though this time it sounded more like a laugh. Her thin lips twisted into a smirk. “Would you answer? Do you know yourself, shibakin?”

I hesitated, then dropped my eyes. “... No.”

“PAH!” She laughed again, rubbing her hands over the head of her cane. “He is a clever one then.” I jumped as the end of the stick came up and tapped my knee. “Let me tell you, shibakin. No one knows who they are. Many think they do, but they are wrong.” She tapped my knee again, and I met her eyes. “If you wish to know someone, see them through the eyes of those they love. That is where you will find your answer.”

“That is wise, Your Grace.” I said humbly. “...What may I learn from you of the King then?” I noticed Grier shoot me an embittered look. I hid my amusement well.

“Of course it is!” She cried, then turned and smacked her cane against his leg. “Pah! I like this one, apawiwi! You will keep him.” She glanced back at me. “As for this abhama!” She whacked him again. “He never thinks! He never waits! He just acts acts acts!” She punctuated each repetition of the word with a whack against his leg. Grier scowled, trying to swat the stick to the side unsuccessfully. She was quicker than I would have expected. 

“Mother!” He hissed, and I thought I saw his cheeks burn a little darker. “I am a grown man. You cannot-”

“PAH!” She shouted, smacking him one last time for emphasis. “You are a child still, apawi, because you still act like one. Perhaps marrying this shiba will calm your passion.” Morag turned back to me, and I eyed her cane warily. “He is passionate, yes? He is heat and fire and burns at both ends. He feels everything. And he wears it on his ridiculous looking sleeves.” I pursed my lips to keep them from twitching. “You! You, shiba. You are cool, and calm. You are stone in a storm. You think before you act. Two minutes and I see this plain!” She banged her cane on the ground at the foot of her chair. “Teach this abhama some of your ways. And he will help you crack your mask to burn hot as he does, shibakin.” She nodded, as if agreeing with herself as she thought her words through.

“His name is Nikostratus, ina.” Grier grumbled, crossing his arms in a pout over his chest. “Not shibakin.”

“Pah!” She scoffed. “I am old, cai thani, I do not have time for such a long name.” She banged her cane against the floor. “PAYE! Bring us drinks! Ash usi yage!”

“Ina!” He scolded. “It is not even noon!”

He jerked his legs up to avoid her swinging cane. “PAH! I am cai thani, what do I care for noon? It does not wait for me. I shall not wait for it.” Morag turned back to me. “You, mo shiba, shall bring me your sister. I have always wanted a daughter. And this siut abhama,” She swung at Grier again, “Is quick in everything but giving me grandchildren.”

I tried to sort out her words, blinking slowly. The goblin attendant returned, and I found a glass pressed into my hand. It was filled with a clear liquid, and I could already smell the strong vapors wafting from it. I glanced at Grier, who had a different shaped glass in his own hand. But considering the grimace on his face, I was guessing his held the same liquor as mine.

“I would be honored to bring my sister here,” I started carefully, watching the little old goblin draw in a deep, pleased breath from her own glass, “But I am afraid there may be… other complications Your Grace-”

“PAH!” She shouted, and clapped the bottom of her cane on the ground again. “You will call me ina, mo shibakin. Ina Morag. And what what? What is this you speak? ‘Complications’? PAH! You are a Prince, no?”

“Yes, but-”

“There is no but!” She snapped. “You want her to come? You bring her. There, I make it simple.” Scarlet eyes darted to her son. “Perhaps I am wrong. Perhaps you are better match because you are both abhamak.”

“Your Grace-”

“Ina Morag! Ina Morag!” She practically shouted. Snapping her cane against the floor. “You are deaf, mo shibakin?” She turned back to Grier. “You are not teaching him goblinese? Gunum! That I should have a son that would not know my own language. Nare!”

“Nikostratus has barely been here a week, ina,” He breathed exasperatedly, rubbing at his brow with one hand, “We already decided to procure-”

“Gunum! You make excuses, Grier. Teach the boy goblinese. Nisle! Yes?”

He nodded, smirking. “Yes, inana. I hear you.”

“Pah!” She leaned over to me, holding one hand by her mouth conspiratorially. “He says this, and then as soon as I am out of ear, he will do what he wants anyway.” She nodded to me. “Do not let your manwe pull this on you, mo shiba.” A familiar mischievous grin spread her thin lips. “I will teach you his tricks, mo shiba. I am his inana. I know them all.” She tapped her cane lightly on the floor. “Come and visit your ina Morag. You are welcome here.”

I dropped my gaze, flattered and feeling heat rising to my ears. I heard her laugh, and recognized in its echo another thing her son had inherited from her. I chanced a peek at him out of the corner of my eye, and saw him hiding a small smile, his face equally flushed.

“Hechi!” She proclaimed, her voice softer than I had yet heard it. She held her glass high. “To your union, yes? And your future together.”

I recognized a toast when I heard one, and raised my own glass in a soft salute. I gritted my teeth as I brought the strong smelling liquor to my lips. I tried not to let it linger in my mouth longer than necessary. But I wasn’t entirely sure I hadn’t just swallowed fire. I heard Grier coughing as he downed his own, and felt the corners of my eyes water as I tightened my jaw and resisted the burn in my own throat.

Morag chuckled, seemingly unaffected by hers. She tapped one long boney finger and the attendant returned to refill her glass. They didn’t bother to offer more to us, for which I was glad. Manners aside, I wasn’t certain I would be able manage a second. The burn settled heavily in my stomach, and I swallowed a few times trying to clear it.

Suddenly, the old Queen began to speak again, long and flowing sentences in goblinese. I couldn’t even attempt to follow along, let alone pull individual words out. Again, her voice was soft, and though she looked at me as she spoke, I could see Grier stiffen in his seat. When she finished, there was silence for a long moment, and it rang in my ears. I turned to the King to find his face a little pale and his lips tight.

Finally, he nodded, looking down at the floor. “... Tasu, inana.”

I didn’t know the word, but it sounded affirmative, as if he were confirming something she had said. Her eyes finally fixed on him, her head tilting to the side. She spoke a shorter sentence in goblinese, and I could feel the tender warmth in it. I shifted, uncomfortable to sense such a moment between mother and son, even if I couldn’t understand what was being said. It was intimate, and I felt as though I were trespassing. After she finished, Grier hesitated before nodding. A moment later he stood.

“She wishes to speak to you alone for a moment,” He told me as I started to follow him, “...I’ll wait in the hall.”

My composure almost slipped, but I managed to keep it as he took up his mother’s hand. Then bent down and gave her a gentle kiss on the cheek. She smiled, patting his face fondly. He passed me one last look, which I couldn’t quite read, then left. Leaving me alone with the Dowager Queen.

She waited until the door clicked closed behind him, eyeing me all the while. I stayed still under her scrutiny, but felt my heart going a mile a minute in my breast. The minutes ticked by in silence, and I waited with practiced patience despite the knots slowly tying and untying themselves in my stomach.

“I have but one son.” She began finally, tapping her glass quietly. “One child. Grier is my everything, shibakin. And I would see him happy before I die.” She sighed, taking a sip and leaning back in her chair. “It does not matter what I say, he will do what he wants in the end. But I would know you, so that perhaps when my time comes I can go in peace.”

I straightened slightly, rolling the empty glass in my own hands. “I will give you whatever peace I can offer, Your Grace.”

“Hmmm. I see you do that.” She jerked her chin at me. “I have known you ten minutes, and I see it. You hide yourself, whenever emotions might show. You become stone.” I tried not to tighten more at her words, and therefore prove their weight of truth. “... But I sense you feel things strongly. Perhaps even more strongly than Grier does.” I said nothing, yet felt her words sink inside me like an anchor off the side of a ship. Dragging me down to dark depths. “... Do you love my son?”

I felt cold at her words, and my jaw clenched. “I barely know him, Your Grace. We just met a few days ago.”

“So? Does this matter?”

“... I am not sure I know what it means..” I admitted to her weakly, my voice soft but honest.

“You love your sister.” She pointed out. “You build a peace for her.”

“Yes, but... that is different.”

“Can you love my son?”

I almost winced. “I do not know.”

“Does he make you happy? Or is this a marriage of necessity?”

I thought about that for a long, quiet moment. I considered just telling her what she wanted to hear. Just speaking sweetly to soothe her conscience. I shifted, looking down at the ground without really seeing it. Knowing I couldn’t do it.

“... It started with my responsibility to my Kingdom. To bring peace.” I told her honestly, my voice hesitant and uncertain. “But… He’s been… I-I…” I gritted my teeth. “I am… not very good at expressing myself.”

“Hmmm.” She tilted her head to the other side. “When you touch, does your mind spin?”

“... Yes.” 

“When you see him, does your heart skip?”

“... Yes.”

“Have you kissed him?” I blushed furiously. She scoffed at that, and her jewels jangled as she shook her head. “And?”

I thumbed the glass, and felt my blush deepen. But I forced the words from my lips. “A-and … I can’t breathe… I can’t… think… I have no words, but feel I have so much to say…” I shook my own head. “I apologize, that makes no sense.”

“Love doesn’t make sense, abhama shibakin mo.” She replied, sounding amused. “I was not sure I loved his father when we married. Perhaps I did not then. But I came to love him.” Her voice became pained. “I miss him every day now.”

“I am sorry for your loss, Your Grace.”

“I am sorry for yours, shiba apawi mo.” She tapped my boot lightly with her cane. “Call me ina, yes? Ina Morag. Make an old lady happy.”

“As you wish… Ina Morag.” I tried not to mumble, and glanced up at her as I spoke.

She gave me a kind smile. “You do make him happy, mo shiba. It is obvious to anyone who knows him. Just in the way he looks at you. I never thought Grier would be one to settle his wild spirit with one heart. But, I believe he has settled his heart on yours… And I believe one day your heart will settle into his.” She smirked. “Though you may not notice when it does.” A laugh this time. “You may just wake up one day and realize it's there, and has been for a while.”

My blush returned. “...I would be lucky then, ina Morag… You have a good son.”

“Pah!” She exclaimed then waved her hand at me. “Now away with you, mo shibakin. Your youth has drained mine, and I must rest now.” She smacked me lightly with her cane as I moved to stand. “But come back soon, yes?” A familiar grin settled on her lips. “I would know more about my new child. And bring your sister!” She sighed. “It would do an old heart good to see a child’s face in this palace again.”

I bowed low at the waist, and her hand came up. Patting my head lightly. “As you wish, ina Morag. I will do what I can.”

“Toksor, mo shibakin.” She called lightly after me as I made my way to the door.

Grier waited anxiously in the hallway beyond, pacing back and forth. He jumped at the sound of the door opening, and rushed over quickly as I stepped out.

“How did it go? Are you alright? What did she say?”

I shook my head, slowly closing the door behind me, trying to settle my swirling thoughts. “Well, she was right about one thing at least.”

He peered up at me, his anxiousness settling into lines at the corners of his eyes. “What’s that?”

I hid my smile as I turned to stride down the hall. “Your sleeves are ridiculous.”

...

UPDATE: Part seven HERE

[bitterlikesweets]

Love Bites Ch 8

This is the eighth chapter of a modern/vampire AU ereri fanfic. You can also read it on Ao3. 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8

Next

Gray-blue eyes darken like a storm cloud.

“You want to kill the vampires who killed your mother.”

It’s not a question, but Eren nods, and Eren watches as thin black eyebrows dip slightly, Levi’s lips pulling into a tight frown. For a moment, Eren expects Levi to reprimand him, to tell him that he shouldn’t stoop to their level, or some other self-righteous bullshit. He hasn’t told anyone about the burning in his chest, the desire to hurt those monsters as bad as they hurt his mother. He’s been hesitant to admit the desire to himself, a part of him truly afraid that revenge will make him a monster too—as if he has any humanity left in him.

But he also knows that he’d want to kill them even if they hadn’t turned him. He wants them dead with every fiber of his being.

Maybe Eren was already a monster, even before he was turned.

So, he waits for it. The disgust, the disdain, the feelings he’s felt towards himself these past few months. He expects to see it on Levi’s face, for Levi to view Eren as he views himself. Levi has willingly given up killing vampires because he thinks that they’re still human. Levi has put that sort of violence behind him. He was a vampire hunter from birth, and he chose to quit.

Eren is the opposite.

Where do his mother’s murderers fit in Levi’s criteria for vampires who deserve to live and vampires who deserve to die? Where will Eren fit if—when he kills them?

Levi pulls his hand out of Eren’s, and Eren braces himself, his gaze locked onto the table.

“We need to go.”

It takes Eren a moment to process the words, and by the time he raises his head, Levi is across the room, his hand already on the break room door.

“Go where?”

“Somewhere I can teach you properly.”

That’s how Eren ends up following Levi into the parking lot, and then driving with only the taillights of Levi’s car to guide him through the darkened streets. Levi hasn’t said a word since they left the restaurant, so Eren just blindly follows, taking turn after turn until they’re in a suburban neighborhood Eren has never been in before.

Levi marches purposefully to a narrow, two-story house after parking on the sidewalk, and Eren hurries to follow him.

“The easiest way to kill a vampire is to ambush them in their sleep and drag them into the sun,” Levi says as he unlocks the door to the house.

He steps inside and swerves to the left, throwing open the door to a coat closet just beside the entrance. Eren watches him curiously, closing the door behind them.

“Obviously, you can’t do that, or you’d die too,” Levi continues, kneeling on the floor as he rummages through the small closet.

Eren glances around the still dark house. Levi has yet to turn the lights on, but Eren is more than comfortable in the dark these days anyway. He scans the area, takes in the living room, the winding staircase and the small kitchen down the hall from the entrance. He doesn’t know what he’s looking for—though perhaps a part of him was hoping that Levi would have a wall of knives and stakes and weapons, like a vampire hunter from a movie—but there’s nothing unusual about the place, other than the fact that almost all of Levi’s furniture appears to be black.

Levi emerges from the closet and tosses something at Eren’s feet. Eren frowns once he realizes what it is.

“So I should use a water gun?”

“It’s a possibility,” Levi says. “It was a personal favorite of mine when I was younger. I’d fill it with holy water and spray them in the eyes; it doesn’t kill them, but temporarily blinding them provided good opportunities for other tactics.”

Eren swallows, staring down at the colorful toy with a mix of awe and apprehension. He can imagine it for a moment. Young Levi—in his early teens maybe?—armed with a water gun and a stake, spraying vampires in the face and stabbing them while they claw at their eyes.

Eren is extremely glad he’s on Levi’s nice list.

“The most important thing is the element of surprise,” Levi continues, back to sorting through his closet. “I’m human, so vampires have every advantage over me. Strength, senses, healing… For you, the vampires you want to kill will likely have more combat experience than you. You’re at a disadvantage by default, so you need to create your own openings.”

The next thing that Levi pulls out of the closet is a metal crossbow, and Eren stares incredulously at the weapon as Levi holds it out to him.

“This is always effective; it’s quick and simple,” Levi explains as Eren takes it into his hands, trying to make sense of the mess of metal bars and wires. “But only if you nail the first shot. You have to get them in the chest.”

Eren frowns.

“And if I miss?”

“Best case scenario, you’ve alerted the vampire to your presence but have injured them enough that you have a chance at close combat.”

“What’s the worst case scenario?”

“You didn’t hit them, and you die.”

Eren’s not sure why he asked.

“In any case, you need to prepare for close combat no matter what method you choose.”

Levi gets to his feet and kicks the closet door closed. As he turns back to Eren, he throws something, and Eren is used to the man’s sudden tosses, so he catches it with ease. As he examines the object in his hands, he realizes it’s a wooden knife, blade and all.

“Alright,” Levi says, stretching his arms out for a moment before crouching slightly, flipping the knife in his hand. “Try to kill me.”

Eren blinks.

“...What?”

Levi rolls his eyes as if Eren is the ridiculous one here.

“It’s a simple task, brat. Try to kill me.”

“I’m sorry—what part of what you just asked me to do is simple?”

“Don’t get queasy now. You’re the one who wanted to learn how to murder people.”

“Yeah, but—”

“I’ll give you ten seconds, or I’m striking first.”

Eren’s gaze locks on the knife gripped in Levi’s hand.

“Ten.”

“Levi—”

“Nine.”

“Will you just—”

“Eight.”

Eren watches the man’s grip on the wooden handle tighten, sinking a bit lower into his crouch.

“Seven.”

“Oh for fuck’s—”

Eren grips his the knife tightly and it feels large and foreign in his hand—and a part of his brain realizes how fucking stupid he is because how the hell is he supposed to murder a vampire if he doesn’t know how to hold a knife—and he rushes at Levi, knife raised. He’s halfway to him, pushing his feet to run as fast as they can in the small room. He’s looking at Levi’s chest, trying to pretend that the hunter is a vampire. He pulls the weapon back like he’s pulling back for a punch.

When his arm shoots forward, he accidentally glances up at Levi’s face because the man has yet to move a muscle, and he swears for a moment that Levi is on the verge of a smirk—

Levi catches Eren’s arm before he can land a blow on him, twisting the limb sharply until Eren yelps and drops the wooden weapon. A swift kick to his ankles sweeps Eren off his feet, and Levi releases his arm to shove him to the floor, dashing any hopes Eren had of regaining his balance. Eren’s eyes squeeze shut as his back slams into the ground, and when he opens them again, Levi has a hand against his throat and the point of the knife hovering above Eren’s chest, where his dead heart is unable to portray the panic surging through his veins.

“You sure you thought this through?” Levi asks.

“I have!” Eren exclaims at first, but a raise of Levi’s eyebrow makes him frown and avert his gaze. “Maybe not so much about the execution of the plan, but…”

Levi scoffs and pulls away, tossing his knife in the air and catching it with enough ease that it makes Eren want to snap at him for showing off.

“Again.”

“Can’t you at least give me a few pointers about what I’m supposed to do—”

“Ten.”

“Are you really going to—”

“Nine.”

Eren glares at Levi, but the man tilts his head slightly, sinking back into his defensive stance.

“Eight.”

“Fuck you.”

Eren closes his eyes and takes a deep breath before scrambling to his feet. Okay. Trying to just rush him from the front is stupid anyway. He needs to think of something else.

“Seven.”

By the time he rushes towards Levi, he has not thought of something else.

He pulls back his arm and then practically throws himself forward. Levi reaches out to grab his arm out of the air like he did before, and Eren watches the movement, thinking that he can just dodge Levi’s grasp and try again—

Except it’s far harder to stop his own momentum than he thought it would be.

Levi grabs him and yanks Eren closer, and Eren feels the knife on his chest before he sees Levi’s arm move.

“You’re too slow,” Levi says, and Eren grits his teeth, yanking himself away.

He rummages around in his pockets, dropping the knife on the floor once he finds a hair tie in the back pocket of his pants. He’s already sweating, and his long hair flying in front of his eyes is not helping. Levi simply stares as Eren pulls his brown hair into an impromptu bun.

When Eren bends down to pick up the knife, he hears, “Ten.”

Eren scowls, but he readies himself. He switches the way he holds the knife, trying to hold it the way Levi does. Levi's grip is a bit looser, with the blade angled upward, sharp end facing out.

“Nine.”

He stares at Levi, trying to understand why he’s positioned the way he is.

“Eight.”

Eren plants his feet firmly on the floor and bends his legs slightly.

“Seven.”

He looks at Levi’s feet. The man is leaning forward slightly.

“Six.”

Eren leans forward, puts his weight on his toes and the balls of his feet.

“Five.”

He gets it, for a moment. It’ll be better for when he moves. It’s like he’s poised at the starting line of a race, waiting for the gun to go off.

“Four.”

Eren pulls his arms up in front of himself, shielding his face and his chest. He doesn’t know about knives, but he’s been in more than his fair share of fist fights.

“Three.”

He clearly doesn’t know anything about attacking just yet.

“Two.”

Maybe he’ll be better at defending.

“One.”

If nothing else, he’ll have the chance to observe Levi’s approach.

Eren watches Levi dash forward, and he pulls his knife in front of himself, thinking he can block Levi’s attack—

Levi’s arm moves like a flash, and Eren’s vaguely aware of pain in his hand before he takes in the crack of wood slamming against wood, before he realizes that thing flying through the air is his knife. He sees Levi shift his feet, his arms low, and Eren tries to jump out of the way, but Levi is too quick, his arms shooting upwards and forwards, and Eren can fucking hear the air whizzing around Levi’s arms, and for a second he thinks, this is where I die—

The wooden knife stops an inch away from his throat, but Eren is still trying to lean away and he loses his balance, stumbling backwards and falling on his ass.

Levi stands over him, knife loosely in his hand. He’s frowning, but there’s something different about his eyes. Eren isn’t sure if he’s imagining it, but something in Levi’s eyes looks like it’s shining, like there’s something about this whole ordeal that excites him, thrills him.

His voice does not carry that same excitement.

“Never let the vampire attack first.”

Levi turns abruptly on his heel, marching back to his previous position. Eren takes a deep breath, wiping the beginnings of sweat from his forehead.

“Again,” Levi snaps, and Eren hurries to his feet, scrambling to find his knife as Levi continues to count down.

~ ~ ~

An hour later, and Eren is a tired, sweaty mess on Levi’s living room floor. He’s just been knocked off his feet for the umpteenth time. His chest is heaving, damp locks that escaped from his hasty bun sticking to his face like thin strands of glue. Levi is still standing, staring impassively at the big vampire sprawled on his carpeted floors, long limbs spread out, besides the arm over Eren’s face.

“Fuck,” Eren says, and Levi huffs.

“Let’s stop for today.”

“No!” Eren exclaims, hurriedly pushing himself upwards, though the action makes him dizzy, and he falls back to the floor. “Not until I get you at least once.”

“Eren,” Levi says, “today was just practice. You don’t have to be ready within one day.”

“Maybe I would do better if you explained something instead of just beating me up,” Eren grumbles.

“Today was just for me to get a sense of how you fight. You’re not going to magically be ready to hunt even if I told you what I thought you should do.”

Levi sighs, and Eren shifts his arm away from his face to squint up at the man.

“In any case, this is how I learned. I don’t know any other way to teach you.”

“Pity me,” Eren says, covering his eyes with his arm again. “We’re not all prodigies.”

“That’s why I’m telling you we can stop for today, you shitty brat.”

“No,” Eren says again. “One more… give me one more try.”

“Eren—”

“Just one,” Eren insists, pushing himself to his feet. “Then I’ll stop.”

Levi sighs, running his fingers through his own damp hair.

“Fine. One more.”

They slide back into their positions, and Eren takes slow steady breaths. He’s tired, but he’s not exhausted—his brain is far more fatigued than his body is. Eren wants to get it, and he wants for it all to click. Because he wants to kill those bastards who hurt his mom, and he fears that they’ll be out of his reach if he waits for too long.

He barely remembers what they look like, and it was months ago, for fuck’s sake. He’ll be lucky if the vampires are anywhere near enough for him to even attempt to find them.

“Ten.”

His chest is burning and not just from exertion. His muscles tense at just the thought of those fuckers getting away. He’s pissed at himself for not going after them right away, or at least sooner than this, even though he knows that his lack of knowledge and experience would’ve gotten him killed.

“Nine.”

Eren grits his teeth, and his fangs feel heavy in his mouth. He doesn’t care about the reality of the situation. He doesn’t care if it’s reckless or if he’s not ready. He wants to find them, and he wants them dead. He wants to be the one who kills them. He wants to make them pay.

“Eight.”

He wants to make them scream, just like his mother did.

“Seven.”

His body feels incredibly light as he rushes forward. The knife is in his hand, but he’s rushing face first, fangs bared, his mouth open and ready to snap. He sees his mother’s throat in the back of his mind, bloody and fragile, and it’s far too easy to envision those red-eyed monsters in front of him, thanks to the darkness of Levi’s house—

Levi.

The man’s eyes are wide, and even though Eren sees that his hands are already coming up to block, even though he knows that Levi is a vampire hunter, that it’ll be easy for him to dodge, he freezes midstep, close enough that he can hear Levi breathing.

The fire in his chest has stopped burning, and he feels sick to his stomach.

“Eren?”

Eren’s whole body feels stiff. He brings his hands up to cover his mouth and looks back to the spot where he was previously standing. He moved so fast. He doesn’t remember taking more than a single step.

“I’m sorry,” Eren says, his voice muffled by his hands.

“For what?” Levi asks, trying to step into Eren’s line of sight, but Eren jerks his head away. “That was good; we should’ve been practicing like that this whole time. With the way you are, sometimes I forget. But you should be using all your abilities. Your fangs are a better weapon than any shitty knife.”

“No.”

“No?”

“I don’t—I don’t want to practice like that.”

“Why not?”

Eren wants to vomit. He squeezes his eyes shut, and he’s reliving that day again. But it’s different. He sees himself at the party, thrashing about. He’s throwing his cake off the table, breaking all the windows in the house. His mother is screaming at him, Stop Eren, please! He’s the vampire. He’s the red-eyed monster tearing his mother’s throat out.

His mouth—his fangs throb.

It’s not true. He knows it’s not. He was human before that night.

But a memory that is most definitely real flashes in his brain. One he’s been trying to push down.

It’s the morning after his birthday. He’s in a panic, calling the police, begging them to save his mom even though she’s already gone. And he sees himself in the reflection of the glass scattered around the house. There’s blood on his mouth. He wipes it off, and that’s when he sees the scar, the fangs. And somehow, a part of Eren knows that the blood in his mouth isn’t his own.

“Eren!”

Levi’s voice drags him back to the present, and Eren is still pressing his hands over his mouth. He’s crouched on the floor, curled in on himself, and there’s something wet spilling over his cheeks, his hands.

Levi kneels down in front of him, and Eren realizes he’s crying. Again.

He feels pathetic.

“I don’t—” Eren chokes out. “I don’t want to fight like that. Like them.”

“Okay,” Levi says, and his voice is soft.

“I don’t wanna be like them,” Eren says, “but I… I—”

“It’s okay,” Levi says, “you won’t be.”

“But I—”

“Eren,” Levi says, and his firm tone makes Eren press his lips together, dropping his gaze to the floor.

He feels a hand on his shoulder, and then it slides lower, to the center of his back. And when Levi pushes his unsteady body forward, Eren falls without complaint. His head drops onto Levi’s shoulder, and he feels like a child as he reaches out to grasp Levi’s shirt in his hands. The man’s arms wrap around him, and Levi sits there, silent, as he lets Eren cry into his shoulder, wide shoulders shaking with the effort to regain control of himself.

“Am I a monster?” Eren asks, his already quiet voice muffled as he speaks the words into Levi’s shoulder.

“No,” Levi whispers, and his head drops to rest on Eren’s. “You’re human. Fuck, you’re more human than me.”

“What do you…?”

Levi just shakes his head and pulls Eren closer. Eren sighs, sagging against Levi.

“Don’t wanna be like them,” he mumbles again.

“You won’t be,” Levi whispers. “You won’t be.”