#Is was a Landside

[mangadumpingground]

Now that the 2024 Presidential Election is over for America ... Donald John Trump has WON by a LANDSIDE, and the Republicans have taken firm control of the Senate, and STILL control the House, we can finally get some really deserved sleep.

[godaime-obito]

I think ao3 is going to hit 4x their fundraiser goal soon

[skeleton-on-wheels0]

you may ignore this entire thing, i just need to keep this in a dream diary, but i'm too lazy to actually keep one, and this is somehow more intimate than a book that my mother will read through when she wants to clean my bookshelf

so, i had this dream yesterday in which i was in love with a boy. we were in my grandparents' garden. he was a bit taller than me, but i decided to pick him up. after a few giggles, he did the same thing to me. i have no idea what happened but my chest was filled with happiness and love that moment. he lifted me from below my ass. i think we kissed, but my grandparents and parents were somehow mad that we were togheter, but i couldn't care less.

i also think that this boy is one of my classmates that i've developed a crush on. he's the son of a priest and has a twin.

[tillman]

STOP VOTING GALEHAUT HE HATES WOMEN AND RAN A RED LIGHT AND DOESN'T RECYCLE

galehaut ran over my dog with his horse can we cancel this guy how the fuck is he beating millia rage

[hor3nee]

Not a single person voted darkside chronicles Leon never forget. Never forget.

[svsembedded]

Early Landside Detection System Using IOThttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5wjgNQAs8Mw

[cheecats]

Evil peepaw won by a landside lets goooo, I'll do another round some other time! <3

[mixelation]

wait here's something weird and kind of niche i wrote a while ago

sakura's POV, meant to be a build up to itasaku but barely contains a hint of itachi

From Sakura’s point of view, it goes like this. 

She takes a call from the Office of Public Health, which is located in the Fire Country capital and is a civilian institution. They theoretically have no power over anything Konoha does, but occasionally Sakura has to field angry calls about Konoha shinobi spreading diseases long distance, or putting things in public wells, or that one time some idiot chunin squad caused a landside that wiped out a major delivery of medicines to a rural province. 

“Konoha Hospital, Haruno speaking,” Sakura says, plastering a fake smile across her face even alone in her office. 

“Ah, yes, is this the…” The voice on the other end pauses, and Sakura hears the shuffling of papers. “Lead Medical Jounin?”

The woman says this like she can’t believe it’s a real title. But as of two months ago, it’s Sakura official, very important, and extremely high ranking title. It’s come with more annoying phone calls than she anticipated. 

“That’s me,” Sakura tells her. “To whom do I have the pleasure of speaking?”

The woman on the other side is head of Fire Country’s tuberculosis response team. She’s calling because of several very worrisome cases of TB across the Western provinces. 

“Multi-drug resistance is common in Water Country,” Sakura replies airily. She would rather people not be getting MDR-TB in general, but also, this is not her job unless this lady is about to tell her they tracked it to Konoha shinobi. 

Just to be sure, Sakura continues, “As you should know, Konoha includes an annual TB screen for all active shinobi, and a full course of antibiotics for any infected shinobi. Is this, perhaps, a courtesy call that we should be on the lookout for resistant strains?”

“It’s not coming from Water Country,” the woman tells her hotly. “We don’t know where it’s coming from. Contact-tracing hasn’t worked. These towns aren’t even on normal trade routes.”

Sakura’s cheeks are starting to hurt as her fake smile broadens. “Ah, well, if you require Konoha’s assistance, the more appropriate office is Mission Requests–”

“No traceable contacts paired with no obvious source,” the woman interrupts, “is almost always shinobi, Haruno-san.”

Sakura purses her lips, smile failing her. She just said they made sure anyone catching TB on the job was screened for and treated. She knows years ago that Tsunade had to handle some fiasco where a select few Konoha-nin were spreading an STI all over the place, but this situation is different. 

“What exactly do you want?” Sakura asks, voice hardening. 

“We’re auditing you,” the woman says. “I have an order signed by the Daimyo.”

Fuck, Sakura thinks. 

Sakura attempts to dump the audit on Tsunade. Tsunade laughs in her face. Sakura does manage to get approval for funding more overtime for medical ninja and staff to deal with it; Tsunade rarely argues against dumping money into the hospital or Medical Corps. 

Several thousand TB tests later, and many hours of Sakura organizing and photocopying records to prove they really were screening everyone, and she is royally pissed. Also, tired and probably malnourished from resorting to cup ramen for dinner too many nights. The audit is time consuming, and it doesn’t excuse her dealing with numerous other crises the hospital has just by virtue of being a hospital, on top of all her usual duties. 

Ms. TB Response Team deigns to make the trip down to Konoha to go through their audit. She looks exactly how Sakura imagined her on the phone: chin-length graying hair gelled into place, thick-rimmed glasses, a lab coat over a blouse and pencil skirt. It takes her and two other team members three days to go through the documents Sakura offers, and then another day to tour the labs to make sure they’re adequate. 

Ms. TB Response Team seems disappointed when they find nothing. Sakura doesn’t not want to harm a civilian woman just for doing her job, as annoying as it is. But she does sort of want to throw her desk through a window and yell I TOLD YOU SO. 

“This is good news,” Ms. TB Response Team says eventually, seated across from Sakura’s desk, “although inconvenient.”

Inconvenient? Sakura wonders, struggling to keep her smile in place. Yes, from the capital’s perspective, it would be a really convenient explanation if it were just Konoha ninja spreading TB around. They’d have their source and then also the ability to demand Konoha do something about it. 

But also: Tsunade’s Konoha doesn’t do this shit. Not with something as easily detectable as TB. 

“I’m glad we could assist in your investigation,” Sakura replies, surprising herself at how smooth her voice sounds. “Will that be all?”

“Mm, no,” Ms. TB Response Team responds, pushing up her glasses on her nose. “Perhaps the parameters of the audit were unclear. We’d also like to see your records on missing-nin movement.”

Shit, Sakura thinks. 

This one she really does get to dump on Tsunade. She’s positive of it as she opens the office door and gestures Ms. TB Response Team inside. 

Usually a small group like a disease response team wouldn’t be able to convince Konoha to share highly classified information like this. Another Kage probably wouldn’t let them at it, end of story. But Tsunde is a doctor first and Hokage second. She looks at the reports on MDR-TB, leans back in her chair, groans, and mashes the palms of her hands into her eyes. 

Multi-drug resistance means the bacteria do not respond to two or more of the available anti-TB drugs. This makes them difficult to treat, and untreated TB has a high mortality. They can’t let this spread. 

“Fine,” Tsunade eventually says. Ms. TB Response Team perks up. “No, I’m not letting you at our records. But I’ll let you have Sakura.”

Sakura immediately tenses, and the floorboard cracks underneath her as she shifts her position.

“Shishou,” she starts. 

“Sakura can go through the documentation and report back relevant findings,” Tsunade continues. “I assure you she’s highly competent.”

“Shishou,” Sakura repeats. “I have other important duties. Surely another shinobi is more suited to–”

She just got this position, and four out of the six months she’s been doing it have been this stupid audit. She doesn’t even have her feet under herself properly.

Tsunade eyes her levelly. “Learn to delegate,” she says. 

Several more floorboards crack when Sakura stomps out of her office ten minutes later.

[merrybandofmurderers]

so, varric won the last poll by something of a landside, unsurprisingly. so now i wanna see how things go if the varric-mancers went with their second choice

(note: this is only about the main games, the awakening romance poll was done already [yes, nathaniel won])

[aleppothemushroom]

Inside Out 2 review

It's a rare thing to have a Pixar sequel that's as good as the original. Now, would I say Inside Out 2 is better than the original? Uuuhhh...no. Not really. Do I still think that it's an incredible film that does right by its predecessor? Absolutely.

For one thing, it doesn't conveniently forget the main character's arc from the first movie. Joy no longer passive-aggressively dismisses Sadness for being "useless." She treats the latter like an equal now, even letting her go on an important assignment.

The movie's message is also unique in how it's not "every emotion is important" and more about self-love. And what I really appreciate is that they don't tell you to practice self-love. They show you how to self-love. They find a way to perfectly visualize how being too hard on yourself is bad for you and how to treat yourself nicer. True, it's probably the only movie that can visualize that, but still it's so refreshing. Really hit home for me (I cried a little but not a lot because I'm a man [totally]).

Speaking of emotions, they're all just as entertaining and fun as they were before. There's a scene with Joy and Anger that particularly stands out. I love the new emotions too. Well...most of them, but we'll to that in a bit. Ennui and Embarrassment are both huge moods. Anxiety steals the show by a landside. She's funny, she's relatable, and she makes a great antagonist without being a "bad guy." She has her place in Riley's mind, she just doesn't exactly know what it is yet and is trying to do what she thinks is best.

Cool transition alert, Riley feels more like a...character in this? In the first movie she felt more like a vessel for the emotions, while here she feels way more independent and her own person rather than just an extension of the emotions (which is actually a major theme in the story).

The movie is also very funny. I'd even say it's more funny than the first. (Riley's hidden secrets are a huge highlight).

Now, what's holding Inside Out 2 from being better than the first movie to me? Well, let's get the minor nitpick out the way, I don't like Fear's new voice. Tony Hale's doing a fine job, but it does not sound like Fear. Which is weird because Disgust's new voice sound fine. Could they have not found someone else who sounded a bit more like Bill Hader? Like, there's gotta be a voice double you have on speed dial somewhere.

Now for actual criticisms, Envy. I like the concept behind the character. I like the design of the character. I do not like how they use this character. She doesn't really feel like "Envy" to me. The movie mostly just treats her as second-in-command to Anxiety. There's a few moments where she acts more envious, but it feels more like the movie is trying to remind us who she is rather than having her be consistent throughout. By the way, I'm gonna get into some spoilers, just to let you know.

SPOILER WARNING! ABANDON YEE WHO BE WITHOUT KNOWLEDGE!

That scene where Joy breaks down and Anger helps reinvigorate her spirits comes way too early. Which makes the scene where Joy is at her lowest moment and doesn't know what to do get resolved way too quickly.

Joy's arc in this one seems a bit undercooked. Like, I can see an inkling of her starting to believe that she's useless in Riley's growing mind, but it's only an inkling that gets resolves anyway.

Another arc, a story one, of the emotions learning to let Riley grow and develop on her own is also not fully developed. The movie tells us that's what the characters learn but like...did they? I like the idea, I like the resolution, I just didn't see the build-up. And if it was there, it was not that noticeable.

But while I had some complaints, I think the positives outweigh the negatives. This is an excellent Pixar sequel and I would not mind (HA!) if this became their new big franchise. I just hope that Disney doesn't learn the wrong lesson from this film's destined success and starts pumping out sequels like crazy.

[ebaylee422]

Landside

Billy X GF!Reader

Authors Note: We want a scared Dad Billy? Yeah we’re gonna get one.

AU Summary - This is if Billy didn’t ‘actually' die during Season 3. He’s been with the group for a year, even aiding them against Vecna Season 4. Everyone who fell victim to Vecna was trapped in the Upside Down, including but not limited to Barb, Billy (ofc), Bob, Chrissy, Eddie, Jason, etc You get the idea. They all still bear the weight of what happened to all of them. It’s like they were raised from the dead if you will. This fic takes place maybe five years later? So 1990-91 ish

Warnings/Tags: Smut, Unplanned pregnancy, family trauma, name-calling between friends. Fixing everything and any death post season 4, lots of Steddie and Ronance, Talk of body issues, pregnancy fears, fear of not being good enough, Physical violence in the form of threats or thrown objects.

Word Count: 7.8k

I come up from doing a few laps in the pool, stepping up the stairs. Billy walked towards me with a towel in hand.

“Looking good out there Ms. Y/L/N.” I smirk, taking the towel from his hands, dabbing at the water on my face and hairline.

“Thank you,”

“Perfect form, and that suit is marvelous.” he winks.

“Well your form is marvelous,” I say making him blush, “I mean, you are a great teacher, teaching lessons to the kids-”

“You know, I could uh. I could teach you if you like?”

“Oh?”

“Yes, well, I know all the styles.” he looked me up and down, opening a piece of gum. Setting his free hand to follow the strap of the bikini dangerously close to cupping my breast. “Free style, um Butterfly, and Breast stroke.” I watch him breach his soft lips slipping the gum into his mouth, accidentally dropping the towel in my hands.

“Oops.” I bend over, picking up the towel slowly. So he can see the arch of my back and the space between my bathing suit and breasts. “I didn’t know you offered adult lessons.”

“Well you know, I offer advanced lessons to a select clientele. Come to think of it, there's a good pool out at uh, Motel 6 on Cornwallis. Very quiet, you know, very private. Should we say tonight, 8 o’clock.”

“Wouldn’t this be the 4th time this week Mr. Hargrove? I don’t think there’s anything left to teach me.” I brush my hands on his chest toying with the whistle around his neck.

“Oh you see that’s where you're wrong I think there are plenty of things left to do. I just don’t think I’ve pushed you hard enough.” leaning into the tease, brushing up my arm leaving goosebumps even in the damp heat of summer.

“Well I need to-”

“It will be the workout of your life.” he cut me off,

“I will need your help deciding what to wear, you have such impeccable taste.” I ran my hand down my side over the hem of the swim bottoms, knowing it drove him crazy looking at the light trail of hair disappearing into my swim bottoms along my pelvis.

“A tease you are,” he pulls my waist to him, kissing me deeply for everyone at the pool to see how taken we are with each other. My fingertips dip into his waistband, distracting him while my tongue dips into his mouth, snatching the gum and pulling back quickly. "Oh a thief too, I see your game." I blow a bubble, smacking the gum and twisting out of his arms to hold his hands.

“Gotta hit the showers, California, perhaps a rain check? I’ll find you before I leave!” winking and popping the gum one last time, skipping to cool off from the hot sun in the women's locker room. 

Grabbing a fresh towel and some soap from my locker I pull the curtain taut. Letting the water run over my suit, unsticking it with all the chlorine and sunscreen. Hanging it on the hook, tying my hair up and washing my body. Just when there’s suds' coating my eyes I hear someone pull the curtain open,

“This one’s taken!” I hide my body against the wall, trying to wash out the soap when the curtain closes again. Getting frustrated I vigorously put water in my eyes, hearing wet steps. A hand covers my mouth so I can’t scream, turning me around quickly to the haughty chuckle. Billy stands smiling wildly, “What do you think you're doing!” I smack at his chest, he shushes my protest, kissing down my throat creating a bee-line to my chest. Instinctively I hook my arms around his neck, looking down to see he’s also completely naked. “You're supposed to be working, go away.” I hum as he kisses the tops of my breasts.

“But your breasts are so amazing and all soapy. God, have they gotten bigger? My girls, all pretty and sensitive.” he whines on my neck, “and I know you didn’t just buy a suit I wanted, tease me with it. Not wanting me to fuck you, oh not my doll! What have you done with her?!” I laugh as he shakes me, hands on the middle of my spine.

“Okay well then it worked better than I thought, I guess actions speak louder-” he was hammering the spot on my neck that gives my stomach butterflies, “Billy-” I whine.

“Yes? Anything for you.” he looked up, with those gorgeous blue eyes pupils of black onyx swallowing the ocean with lust.

“B, I don’t feel too good...” I pout,

“Well then, let me make you feel so much better, huh? Let Billy take care of you. I'll make you feel better, and damn you smell so good, Indiana.” He doesn’t push my limits by forcing himself on me, just showering me with love in his way of physical contact.

"Billy-..."

"What hurts baby?"

"My back, and I'm nauseous." I hold onto him, playing with his St. Christopher’s necklace under the cool water.

"Well I could blow your back out for ya and buy you dinner afterwards. A nice corn dog and push pop from concessions?"

"You're not helping. You corn dog."

"Correction, it's horn dog." He blows a raspberry along my neck, correcting me.

“Billy! Someone will hear us!” I laugh, running my hand through his wet locks.

“Nope paid that one kid five bucks to scare anyone off, think his name is Ben. Maybe Benson?”

“There’s a teenager outside the woman’s shower room scaring people away so you can fuck me?”

“No, I locked the door and put one of the shower chairs under the handle!”

“Hmm, might take me a little more convincing.” I tease, pushing his shoulders down for him to kneel in front of me. He winks holding onto the backs of my thighs.

“God damn, doll.” He nuzzles his nose along the seam of my cunt, lifting one of my legs to hook over his shoulder. “So fucking wet f’ me, huh?”

“Yes...” I moan when he licks a trail from my entrance to my clit sucking the button into his mouth to roll it over his tongue. He looks up at me as two of his fingers split my folds curling them inside me.

“Shit Billy, ‘M close.” I pant holding the back of his head as he licks my cunt like his favorite ice cream flavor. He pulls off suddenly standing, retreating his fingers from my cunt to circle my clit.

“Want to feel you cum on my cock, doll. Get me there.” He commands, thrusting his swollen and leaky cock against my thigh. I grasp him, rolling in matching circles with my thumb along the tip.

My head thumps the tile wall and we giggle at the noise.

“You okay?” He holds me cheek in his free hand then threading his fingers into my soaked hair.

“Yeah, want you.” I whisper, kissing his lips with bruising passion. He takes himself from my hand lining up with my entrance. Holding my other leg against his hip now so I’m spread open for him. He puts my hand between our bodies above my clit,

“Rub your clit for me, not gonna last long in your pretty pussy.” I whimper at the thought, he kisses me deeply as he pushes inside. My walls have to re-stretch around his girth every time. My free hand accidentally scratches along his back as he pounds into me. He pants into my mouth as he picks up speed, I squeeze around him cumming with a soft cry of his name. That sends him over the edge. I can feel the first wave of his hot load as he pushes himself deeper inside. 

Billy drops my leg, rubbing at my hip and holding me upright as we come down from our high. He kisses along my collarbone as he reaches for my body wash. We spend a few minutes in peaceful post orgasm, treasuring each other’s bodies before he speaks.

“Feel better, doll?” Billy whispers like an unspoken confession.

“A little, thank you honey.” I turn off the water after we clean ourselves off, he dries off by shaking out his hair like a dog. Pelting me with water droplets in the process.

“What?” He acts innocent as I dry my arms and legs, “I’m going back to the pool anyway.” He hands me a towel allowing me to dress moderately dry. Giving up his water after his guided workout, I take one sip before being hauled over his shoulder.

“Billy!” I yell as he grabs my bag from the hook, moving the chair from the door.

“What? I promised my girl some dinner!” He smacks my ass when he walks down the hall to concessions.

“Billy put me down, I’m too heavy!” I groan, getting nauseous from the pressure on my abdomen. He sets me down on the counter cutting the line completely, getting one of his close friends Heather’s attention in the process. 

“Horseshit, you’re fucking light if anything and beautiful no matter what. You could turn green and I’d still do ya.” Heather and I audibly cringe at him.

“Regular for both of you?” she asks leaning over the counter

“Yeah, three corn dogs and a large coke with-”

“With mustard I know!” She goes to the single fryer, dropping them in.

“Have you tipped her today?” I ask him, pinching his waist.

“Ow, hey we both work here. I might as well give her some of my paycheck with the amount of food we trade.”

“Trade?” I raise my eyebrow in disbelief “Billy it is your responsibility as the straight white man to empower the women in your life. Be better.”

“Yeah ass-wipe, be a good civil servant and pay me.” Heather leans over handing me a paper cup of Coke with a straw.

“Stuff it dyke.” I gasp smacking him in the chest, “Ow!”

“Bite me lunkhead.” She fires back at him, they flip each other off like children.

“You two are terrible to each other.” I groan, sliding off the counter when she sets the bag down next to us.

“Hey Y/N, are you coming to the tailgate tonight with everyone?” She asks, tearing a twister with her teeth.

“Um, I don’t know yet. We’ll call you tonight if we can’t make it. Right Bills?” I look at him looking for a way out of it.

“No babe we gotta. We’re hosting the after party at our place with everyone. So I can keep an eye on Max.”

“Don’t go all psycho big brother on her, she’s in high school Billy.” They start to argue about what they were exposed to at young ages and with Max’s condition Billy argues she could be taken advantage of. I feel dizzy as they argue, leaning onto Billy’s shoulder for support.

“You can’t say shit because you are an only child, huh?” Billy pulls me closer by my waist, trying to have me side with him. “Doll, you okay?”

“Huh? Just got really sleepy, I think I should nap and pick up the apartment before we have a bunch of our friends and family over.” I kiss his cheek, “I’ll see you at home?”

“Yeah of course, you want me to walk you to the car?” Billy asks worriedly, pressing a kiss to my temple and hugging me tightly goodbye.

“No it’s okay, have a good shift guys. I’ll see you tonight!” I wave leaving the food and cola with Billy. I drive home quickly and pass out on the couch immediately blaming it on the Hawkins heatwave.

I woke up a couple hours later to dishes clanking together and whispered song lyrics. Stretching my aching muscles, I stand seeing a blanket thrown over my lap. Smiling, I walk into our kitchenette to see Billy with his Walkman on full blast, before he can see me. My stomach gurgles and I race to the bathroom, throwing up an empty stomach of Water and Cola. I sit on the floor for a moment dizzy, dry heaving a few times. Noticing I’d knocked over a box of tampons that were unopened. My heart drops as I try to piece together when I’d had my last period.

“Shit...” I scramble off the bathroom floor going into the bedroom with my purse with my planner and address book. By the book it could’ve been anywhere from 7 to 9 weeks ago. It’s not like Billy and I’s sex life isn’t consistent, and birth control wasn’t something I could feel good about. We agreed to use condoms and suffer any consequences if that happened. Last time this happened was in Highschool, Billy took me to the clinic and they gave me something called Danazol or something like that. Everything turned out okay then, but we were older now this really had consequences now if I was truly pregnant.

“Y/N? Where are you at doll?” Billy yells down the hallway, dragging his feet and hitting his hip on the hall table like always. I look at myself in my vanity mirror and quickly wipe my eyes clean. Running into the closet before he steps inside the room. 

“Picking out my outfit for tonight!” I answer back, clearing my throat.

“Oh yeah?” Billy comes around the corner, wrapping his arms around my waist. “Does that mean my girl is gonna give me a little show?” He chuckles.

“Unless you wanna be late to the tailgate? Not again, hot stuff.” I turn out of his arms, looking in our shared dresser for pants.

“Ooo you should wear those black Levi’s your butt looks good in.” He thinks, always having the more trendy style out of the two of us.

“Okay what shirt? I don't want to get too hot.” I add taking the high waisted Levi’s out, with a tired huff.

“I’d say none because you’re already smoking-” Billy teases

“Billy please, you are the one who got me into this mess. Please help me.”

“Okay, I’m sorry for finding you the best thing in my life so violently attractive.” He pleads and pouts “Forgive me, and definitely that solid red crop you wear to the bars.”

“I wear that to show off my boobs and get us free drinks.”

“Exactly, you look great in it.” I scoff, grabbing the clothes and some fresh under clothes.

“Are you ready to go?” I asked him from the bathroom, happy he didn’t look too closely at my facial expressions. Billy has a way with prying things out of people, part of the endless Casanova charm.

“Hell yeah got and eight pack and Munson and that other tall dude are bringing the dobie. We are all set.” He goes on about the plans tonight as I get ready in the bathroom. Looking under the sink after I change my clothes I look for a spare test. Always having some cheap ones lying around for myself or friends. Hitting a particular box with my hand I take it out and go to pee. Setting it on the counter while adding a hint of makeup and volume to my hair.

“Almost ready, Bills.” I call out, waiting longer than three minutes. I close my eyes and flip over the test on the counter. Taking a deep steadying breath in through my nose and out through my mouth. My neck sweats as I slowly open my eyes, looking down. I gasp, loud enough it worries Billy.

“Babe?”

“Sorry accidentally stabbed my eye with the mascara wand!” I say the first thing that comes to mind, cringing as I hold my hand over my mouth.

“Okay we let's get going Indiana, we can’t keep my fans waiting.” He laughs, starting to open the bathroom door. I scramble throwing the test into the medicine cabinet and shutting the mirror.

“Yeah, let’s go!” Billy dips in for a kiss,

“You look beautiful.”

“I look like a sl-”

“No, do you like it?” He asks honestly, I nod my head. He’s matched with cut offs and a Def Leppard muscle tee. “Then you're perfect. Grab your purse doll. I’ll go start the car.”

I smile sighing in relief, wrapping the test in toilet paper and burying it in the trash. Locking the door behind us, Billy already has his new muscle car running. A 1985 Camaro IROC-Z in his signature blue color. The drive to the large run down lot where Star Court had burned down. Gives you shivers thinking about when I lost him for nearly a whole year. He has a hand on my thigh as he pulls up next to Steve’s burgundy BMW. Robin and Nancy immediately separate us, taking me away to get each of us a drink.

“Girls, Jesus hang on a second!” I laugh barely able to get my seat belt off before I’m dragged to Argyle’s Van. 

“Hey there pretty ladies Johnny boy has the drinkies in the front seats.” He says as him and Jonathan’s head hang off the side of the out back doors. They are already toasted.

“Got any Coke?” I ask

“Which kind?” I hear a scruffy voice behind me, turning to see Eddie. I hug him tightly,

“Eddie!” I shriek, swallowing down tears in my eyes as Steve stands awkwardly next to him. I pull him into my next hug “Stevie! When did you morons get home?”

“Couple hours ago, Eddie just sold a few songs to a up and coming band in Texas?”

“Yeah, Pantera? Plus another to Warrant again, they should release their new album sometime this fall.” Eddie confirms a little smug,

“Wow good for you, babes.” I smack Eddie’s bare shoulder, feeling someone’s hands wrap around my waist and sniff my hair obnoxiously. “Billy...” I squirm feeling cold beverages in his hands.

“Hello gentlemen, see you’ve reunited with my lover.” His breath reeks of cheap beer already making my stomach turn upside-down.

“Sure have, wanna bum me a smoke like old times?” Eddie shakes Billy’s hand, Steve and Billy share a nod, still not fully healing their relationship quite yet.

“Go hang out with the guys, the girls and I are gonna mingle with some distant friends.” I encourage him, he gives me the ice cold coke he got for me before heading off with them.

“Okay Y/N,” Robin slurs a little, holding onto Nancy’s hand “now I wouldn’t say I’m an expert on breasts more a connoisseur.”

“Because you like judging people” Nancy laughs,

“Shush, baby. We’re all friends here but babes what are you doing differently? You look so hot, right now!” Robin holds her hands out like she’s trying to convince Nancy and I.

“Just a-” I freeze watching Nancy’s eyes narrow, like she does when she is trying to solve a puzzle. Damn Nancy Drew acting Wheeler.

“Just... What?” Robin asks a little loud, we both shush her.

“I’m late.”

“Late?” Robin looks at her girlfriend quizzically,

“How late?” Nancy’s eyes nearly burst out of her skull, Robin nods along with her eyes squinted.

“The positive kind.” You try to hint to both of them, Robin now bobbing along to the music as she drinks from her solo cup.

“Shit, does Billy know?”

“I took the test before we left, I don’t know what to do.”

“Does he want kids?”

“Yes, no? Shit maybe? We’re just in a really good place right now so I’m nervous.” I shrug, and Nancy hugs me. Robin turns around randomly and then runs towards Steve as he goes to get another beer.

“Everything will be okay, we’re here for you.” She takes my arm and we walk around mingling and chasing Robin away from the trunks with beer pong set up on them after she talks to Steve. 

He walks back over to the guys, Billy is catching up with Heather when Steve whispers something into Eddie’s ear.

“Yeah right, I’m gonna school your ass when we get to my place.” Billy yells at Heather as she walks towards you and the other girls. 

Steve clears his throat, Eddie looks at him oddly. Steve nods towards Billy, Eddie’s brows furrow as he sighs.

“Hey, Billy you're okay with Y/N dressing like that?” Eddie lowly wolf whistles, at the sight of her. Steve knocks on his head with his beer bottle.

“Um hello? I’m right here.” Steve rolls his eyes, Eddie knocks his shoulder, spilling his beer a little on his shirt. Billy laughs when Steve glares back, taking a long drag of his smoke and blowing it in the opposite direction of his friends.

“I picked out her outfit, I know how to fight. Y/N can wear whatever she wants.” Billy says, simply through his exhale.

“Okay man but... Stevie over here did win in ‘84. Just saying.” Eddie says critically, through his teeth, holding his hands up in surrender.

“Hey fuck off Scarface.” Billy scoffs as Steve interjects, wrapping an arm around his very not sober boyfriend's waist.

“Look Hargrove, Eds is just saying Y/N/N has filled out a bit this summer and is getting a little unwarranted attention.” Steve points the neck of his beer bottle to the ex-basketball team, all a bunch of high school rejects still living in their parents basement as they get fatter and older.

“Oh come on, they’re too scared of me to mess with my girl. I came back from the dead remember?” Billy wiggles his spare fingers while oooing and ahhing like a ghost. Eddie laughs at that, knocking their beers together while Steve’s headaches at the idiocracy.

The sun sets and a majority of the adults who have to work in the morning leave. While a majority of the high schoolers stay together drinking the now warm beer, most of our group also sticking close together about starting college or jobs in the fall. Billy and I reunited shortly after to head over to the apartment first, Lucas and Max sat in the back seat of the car as I drove, being the only sober one.

“I totally could’ve driven, I only had a few beers.”

“And smoked a joint with the guys.” I add turning down the music,

“What can't I bond with my little sister's boyfriend?”

“I had one puff, I doubt I’ll even feel anything.”

“One puff was enough, you already drank tonight Lucas.” Max says kindly, 

“Pfft you girls worry too much, right Sinclair?” Billy holds out his fist for Lucas to bump it. He laughs a little too hard when Billy tries to yank him forward.

“Don’t gang up on the only two women that enjoy your company.” Max scoffs at her brother.

“Whatever, you're up for some ball tomorrow Sinclair?”

“He can’t-” She’s cut off my Lucas explaining their plans

“Sorry Billy, it’s Max and I’s anniversary. We’re staying in Indianapolis for the night.”

“Aw how cute, please take pictures.” You fawn over them, you know exactly what Lucas has been through. That pain of losing your first love, knowing at a young age it was your last. Taking this second chance for all it’s worth every moment no matter how insignificant it is to others, is precious.  

“Better wear protection Sinclair, or I’ll have to kick your ass for knocking up my sister.”

“Billy!” Max punches him hard in the shoulder.

“What Billy means is we want you to be smart about your choices, but we can’t tell you what to do anymore-” 

“Just want what’s best for you, you’re good kids. We don’t need more children running around right now, we’re all still kids.” Billy cuts you off, 

“Um, Y/N are you on birth control?” Lucas asks politely, We’d agreed when Lucas and Max got serious their junior year they could ask me and Billy anything. I didn’t want them to feel odd for their feelings or idiots for the things that aren’t taught.

“I didn't enjoy it, I use a diaphragm sometimes which is like a cup that prevents the sperm from going up into the cervix. Yet we mainly use condoms because the latter makes us both uncomfortable.” I put simply, shrugging. I look in the back mirror. Lucas is leaning his head on Max’s shoulder as she plays with his shirt cuff.

“It feels like your jamming your penis into plastic Tupperware surrounded by warm-”

“EW! Ew stop Billy.” Max covers her ears and starts singing to the radio. I turn it up for her, we pull up to our assigned parking. Others start filling up the parking lot shortly after making a b-line straight to Billy and I’s apartment. 

“No, we had to pull off to the side of the road because we were lost, and exhausted!” Billy exasperates, 

“If Billy didn’t finally just pull over, I probably would've strangled him over the armrest.” I add to the story of Billy’s and I’s recent across-country road trip to California.

“So what happened after you figured out where you were?” Will asks

“Not exactly we-”

“We were in the backseat when a Sheriff drove by. We couldn’t even get our pants you all the way before he knocked on the window.” Billy laughs, Eddie and Argyle join him.

“I pulled down my dress while Billy collected himself enough to ask the man, old enough to be my grandfather for directions.” I rolled my eyes, leaning against Billy. He wrapped his arm around me as he finished the story.

“He handed me a handkerchief and slapped me on the back because her lipstick was smeared on my neck.” He pointed right under his jaw,

“Yeah I’m the slut and he was the stud.” I scoff,

“It’s okay baby. He probably keeled over jerking it to the image of you in that sundress when he got home that night.”

“Ew.” I cringe, “Want another babe?” I ask taking his empty beer can away.

“No, I'm good doll.”

“Hey did you hear Carol Perkins and Tommy H. are expecting?” Steve nods, sharing to Billy and I, I stiffen in Billy’s arms thankfully his too tipsy to notice.

“Yeah no shit, I never really gave a shit about them after graduation. They were the kind of people you know in school and then end it. Figures they are one of the firsts to get knocked up.” Billy continues to blabber about how he doesn’t think anyone should have kids until they’re married or at least financially stable among other things. In front of all our friends, who Buckley has told everyone closest to Billy and I. 

My stomach turns as I make eye contact with Steve. Him and Billy did work things out, my friendship with Steve and Steve’s serious partnership with Billy’s closet friend Eddie made a huge difference.  

“I’ll be back..” I walk down the hallway past my spare bedroom where Robin is passed out as Elle and Max read a Cosmo next to her. I go into the bathroom and sit on the toilet trying to collect myself. There’s a knock and a call of my name. “Almost done.” I call out,

“It’s just me doll, are you okay?” Billy talks quietly, I open the door and he swoops me into his arms, “What’s going on? You’ve been weird all night.”

“I’m sorry.” I mumble in his shoulder

“Don’t apologize, I know you haven’t been feeling good lately. Maybe we should make an appointment or something?”

“Yeah, I’ll do that. Can I ask you something?”

“Anything.” He kisses me once, then twice.

“Do you want kids?”

“Is that why your acting strange, because of the pressure of having babies outta high school?”

“You didn’t answer my question...” I whisper looking at the ground trying to will tears out of my eyes

“No, I don’t think I do. My Dad was a shitty father to say the least, he thought having me would save his marriage but the abuse he gave to my mom only got worse afterwards. That’s too much responsibility.” He answers so assured and honest it breaks my heart. 

Maybe a dog, someday but fuck kids. We’d be great Aunt ‘n Uncle to Max’s kids and anyone else who decides to baby-make.”

“Yeah, I guess so.”

“Why do you ask?” Billy asks nervous

“I heard about Carol at the grocery store and wasn’t sure how’d you react.”

“Oh Y/N I don’t give a crap about them. Not when I have you guys.”

“Hey, I think I’m going to say goodnight to everyone and lay down early.”

“Yeah? I can end the party if you need.”

“No, no. I can sleep through anything.”

“Okay doll, whatever you need.”

I go back out into the living room and slowly say goodnight to everyone, Steve, my best friend next to Billy, hugs me a little longer and a little tighter. 

“Good night, honey. We’re here for you.”

“Yeah, always Y/N.”

“Thanks guys, love you.” I blow Eddie and Steve a kiss, Eddie dramatically falls backwards and Steve catches it to place over his heart.

Everyone else bids me goodnight as well, I run into Nancy and she’s waking a very grumpy very sleepy Robin.

“You leaving?” I ask her, Robin is practically curled around Nancy’s small frame leaning on her for support.

“Yeah Robs doesn’t feel good obviously.” Nancy shakes her head, placing a kiss on her partner's cheek.

“I’m never drinking again...” Robin groans

“Get home safe girls, call the house when you get there?” I hug both of them,

“Mike is driving us home since he’s sober, we’ll be okay.” She assures me, small towns were definitely non-conforming but we’d heard of other violence acts committed on same-sex couples in the bigger cities. No one ever deserved that.

Call me, if you need anything. We’re here for you too.” Nancy adds, saying goodbye to everyone as her, Robin and Mike leave.

I go into my bedroom and close the door, putting on my pajamas and removing my makeup. My stomach turns but I go to sleep anyway, a couple hours later I feel the bed dip and a warm arm wrap around my waist. It disappears a few hours later as Billy gets ready for work. Like always, I slowly wake up before he leaves, giving him a goodbye kiss. When he’s out the door, I race to the bathroom and puke my guts out. It’s like that enough of the morning I call out of work. Laying sadly in bed most of the day, until just before Billy gets home around 6. I wash my face and take another test, once again it’s overwhelmingly showing positive. I took this one and the other I hid in the trash last night and put them in my pocket. I conjured a plan on how to tell him, Billy Hargrove. My Billy, he comes home as I’m finishing the only dinner that sounded and smelled appetizing.

“Hey Indiana! I’m home.”

“Hi California.” I call back from the kitchen, plating the chicken and pesto for two. Well three...

How was work?” He kisses me on the cheek, smelling of coconut sunscreen and chlorine.

“It was okay, I had lots of lessons today. The boss is having me take a course on training babies how to swim. Guess it’s in high demand, and extremely important. Almost 45% if not more babies from birth to age four.” He tells me wide eyed, helping me bring the plates to the table as I grab him and beer and the ginger ale I’d been nursing for a couple of hours.

“That’s horrible.”

“Yeah but it means they’re moving me to nearly full-time since those lessons are more important than just the summer. I start working at the Hawkins Rec Center in a few weeks.” He says with a smile hidden by pesto

“Wait, you got a promotion?!”

“Yep, don’t have to go back to the shop this year. I can just teach lessons and couch at the high school.”

“Billy, that's amazing!” I reach out and take his hand,

“I can’t wait, but I’m a little nervous about teaching kiddos so young.”

“You're great with kids Billy.”

“I wasn’t-”

“You’ve changed, you and Max had a lot of unresolved issues. Things have gotten a lot better the past couple years. For christ’s sake she is here for dinner at least once a week if not more. Not even Susan can say she sees her daughter as much.”

“Thanks, how was your day?” He kisses the top of my hand all suave and romantic,

“Haven’t been feeling to good but I think I’ll get better in a couple months...”

“You go to the doctor?”

“No, I took a test yesterday and today.” I swallow the bile rising in my stomach

“If you didn’t go to the doctors-” I cut Billy off, running to the bathroom and clutching the toilet bowl. He follows, then helps by holding my hair and rubbing my back. “We should go to the ER, you didn’t even drink yesterday.”

“It’s okay-”

“No the hell it’s not Y/N! You’re throwing you guts up and you’ve-”

“Billy...” I hold out my hand for him to help me up, flushing the toilet before washing my hands. Tears fall down my cheeks,

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to yell...”

“It’s not that.” I strain to find the two words, hiding my face in my hands.

“What’s going on?”

“Promise we can talk about this?” I turn to him dizzy, I take his hand in mine and go to sit down on our bed.

“We can talk about anything, Y/N.” He pushes my hair out of my face. I reach into my sweatshirt pocket and turn over the pregnancy tests. Tears continue to cascade down my cheeks as Billy freezes his expression is unreadable. He swallows hard taking the tests.

“I’m pregnant.” I tell him wetly, wiping away tears so I can see him better. He stands, throwing the tests down the hall with a clatter. Hard enough I jump at the sudden action. Hands running through his hair, irritation now bursting through the seams.

“What?” He scoffs

“I’m pregnant, Billy.”

“Fuck, Y/N.” He paces the foot of the bed, working himself up “How long? How long did you keep this shit from me?”

“I-I found out last night.” I explained standing close to him.

“Yeah? Is that why you’ve been all weird and shit around me? You were hiding this?”

“Nooo, no Billy. Please.” I try and reach for him,

“Don’t ‘No, Billy’ me. Is this why you don’t want to go on birth control? Just trying to trap me?” His voice gets elevated as the questions continue, he pushes off my hand like he’s been scolded with hot water.

“No, I love you.” I cry, holding onto myself

“Do you? You know I don’t want kids, Y/N!” He gets in my face words booming through the house and my ears and I gasp. “What the fuck?” He storms out the room, hearing him knock into the table in the hall with a groan before there’s a crash and bang. I run out, he’s thrown it across the hallway creating a dent in the drywall and breaking the legs of anything that was on top flung or stepped on.

“Please don’t push me away!” I raise my voice, trying to walk over the mess in my bare feet.

“Did you even think, to consider how I felt?”

“I am trying to understand but you're yelling and throwing things around. Are you blaming me for this?”

“You’ve got some nerve, it takes two Y/N. You won’t make me do shit, now move.” I find him in the living room collecting his wallet and keys.

“Billy, please-” I beg him standing in front of the door, he moves me aside with a strong hand.

“No, I’m leaving. I can’t do this, this is the one thing.”  He spits at me, fire exploding behind his eyes. 

“If you leave, I’ll never forgive you!” I call to him, my voice raw and overwhelmed with emotion.

My mind begging and pleading for him to shut the door and engulf me in his arms. Tell me everything will be okay, that he loves me and we’ll get through this.

“It’s too much.” He fums, the door slams shut behind him, shaking a picture off the wall. 

I hobble over to it, defeated, it’s one from the California trip. Billy had given the camera he borrowed from Jonathan to an older surfer to take a photo of us at the beach in our wetsuits. My hair is tied back, smiling at the camera with a teeth filled grin. While Billy looks at me and smiles, eyes dopey with exhaustion but something he hadn’t felt in a long time. Joy. The glass from the frame has shattered and scratched it, splitting the two of us by our hands. I hold it close as I dial the only people I can trust,

“Yello, Munsington household or Harrinuson if you like that better.” Eddie answers the phone, with his infectious bravoto.

“Hi Eds.” I sob out in relief.

“Y/N, honey. What’s-” His voice deepens immediately in concern,

“I-I told him, he left. He left me.” I weep into the receiver, trying to collect my thoughts.

“Okay, hey do me a favor unlock the door and turn on the TV? Distract yourself while Steve and I get there.” Eddie tells me calmly, ‘What’s going on?’ I hear Steve interrupts.

“Okay. I’ll try, I’m so sick Eddie.”

“Do you need to go to the hospital?” Eddie asks, ‘Is that Y/N/N?’ Steve interrogates still faint on the line.

“No, I’m just puking.”

“Is there blood or anything strange about it?”

“No...” I cry louder

“Hey-hey,” Eddie gets my attention again, “that’s good. Remember what I said, Steve and I are getting in the car right after I hang up.”

“Okay Eds.”

“We’ll be there soon, Sweet Girl.” Steve takes the phone from Eddie who barks ‘Steve where are my keys?!’ 

Hang tight, I’ll be right there. Everything's gonna be fine.” Steve assures both of us.

“Yeah...”

“We’re on our way.” Steve hangs up the phone, staring at his metal head boyfriend with a single shoe on untied and the other in his hands as he tears up the entire living room looking for his keys.

“Eds?” Steve stands by the landline hands on his hips.

“Hold on Steve, I gotta find my keys!” Eddie holds out his shoe pointing it at his boyfriend as he moves to the kitchen table.

“Eddie.” He scolds in a boisterous manner enough to make Eddie look at him

“What?!” Eddie yells, looking at his boyfriend to find him jiggling Eddie’s car keys in his hand,

“Get in the van-.” He motions him to the door,

“Why’d you let me tear up the apartment?”

“It was kinda funny, give me a reason to make you help me clean it when we get home.” Steve throws the keys to Eddie going to the passenger side.

“I haven’t even put my shoes on.”

“I doubt your shoes will have any impact on us kicking Billy’s ass.”

I hear a single knock at the door before a flurry of dark curls and onyx eyes enters the apartment, behind him a tanned honey colored pompadour with equally syrup eyes enters. I suck in a breath, watching them look around. Steve goes to where I’m crouched in the living room, cleaning up the glass from the picture frame. He immediately engulfs me in his arms, not saying a word as I squeeze him a little too tight.

“Hey, shhh. I’m here, Sweet Girl. I got you.” He holds me tight, his caress of my hair like an affirmation he’s molding to my skin with each rub.

“Shit Steve where is she, he tore up the hallway-” Eddie walks with untied shoes to Steve practically hoisting me in his lap as I cry, he holds one of the positive tests.

Hey, Y/N...” Eddie accidentally steps in the pile of glass swept together, he finishes the job with a broom and dustpan. My breathing steadies a bit more with them here, I’m not alone.

“I'm sorry, I don’t have anyone else to call.” 

“Hey now, none of that. Don’t apologize, you’d do the same thing if Eddie knocked me up.” I chuckle at Steve pinching his bicep, feeling relieved by the minute.

“You’d make a great mom.” I breathe deep trying to make the joke back,

“So are you.” Steve kisses my temple, swaying us in the living room. His words sink deep as I hide my wet cheeks and snotty-nose into his shoulder. 

“Um, I don't know if you want your pee stick but I found it in the entryway.” Eddie sits criss-crossed in front of us, setting the test down like an offering in front of me. Taking a minute to finally tie his shoes, as if he hasn't tripped a billion times since leaving the apartment.

“Gross Eddie, it’s just called a pregnancy test.” Steve chortles straightening out his leg to kick the other in the thigh.

“Ow! You’ve hurt me deeply Stevie, I twas trying to lighten the mood. Also that pasta is the freaking bomb.” He swats Steve’s foot away when he nudges him again. Noticing a change in mood again, instead of sadness it’s anger.

“It made me sick, that’s how the conversation started...” I mumble against Steve,

“Wait am I going to get sick from eating some?” Eddie asks alarmed

“No stupid she’s having morning sickness, keep up.” He squints at his boyfriend as if to say ‘read the room’.

“Are you PMS-ing babe? You’ve been awfully mean-” The metal head pouts,

“Shush this is about Y/N.” The King with no crown points his finger angry,

“No, I love it when you two bicker like you’ve been married for 50 years.” 

“One day with this one is a whole year’s worth of irritation.” Steve sticks out his tongue playfully at Eddie shaking his head.

“I wonder what 5 minutes of pleasure with me is then.” Eddie blows a kiss and wiggles his eyebrows.

“Ew stop being in love in front of my unborn child.” the silence is a pregnant as you are.

“So Robin wasn’t just drunk blabbering last night?” Steve rubs his warm hand along my back,

“Nope.” I pop the ‘p’, the silence overwhelms all of us until Eddie gets uncomfortable enough to speak.

“You don’t have to right this second but, you wanna tell us what’s going on?” He fumblingly asks with a concerned smile. I relay all of what happened tonight along with a few more tidbits.

“Billy hasn’t ever explicitly told me he didn’t want kids. So I wasn't expecting him to be excited and have everything figured out but he just left me.”

“Jesus Christ, you talk to anyone else?” Eddie wipes a hand over his forehead, I shake my head. Steve has been tense since I started talking about what Billy said.

“He say where he went?” Steve asks with deathly calm, I shake my head twirling the test in my hands.

“I know where he is, and I’m gonna kill ‘im.” Eddie stands up, taking out his car keys.

“No Eddie!” I whine,

“Munson, where the hell are you going?” Steve stands beside me,

“To talk some sense into this asshole, I love you I’ll be back-” He kisses Steve before running out of the complex.

“Don’t get arrested!” Steve yells out, turning back around to me. “How about you get cleaned up? I’ll clean up out here and we can watch a movie together on the couch like old times.” He offers, holding my arms and massaging my biceps to encourage laughter.

“What about the drywall? And the kitchen-”

“Y/N/N. I’ll call Wayne in the morning, I’m sure he’s got the tools from patching up the trailer. And I’ll clean the kitchen so you don’t get sick again because of the food aversion.”

“You’re stubborn...” I pout, moving over the broken pieces of wall and furniture in the hallway. 

“Nah just enough to not take shit from you and Henderson.” He laughs, picking up the trashed things in the hall as I enter the bathroom. 

Turning on the shower to warm up a few seconds allows the room to fill with steam. The first thing I see in the mirror is me, hazy and weak. Too weak to handle side effects a a little blue pill, to weak to stick up for myself and yell back, too weak to fix things. The mirror fills with steam as quickly as I fill with dread. I start undressing only able to see my body from a upper preview. For weeks I thought I was bloated, stressed out from my job and not working out. The normal protective pudge of my stomach has a small softball size curve that doesn’t move like the rest of me. It’s hard to suck in, and more prominent when I full relax. I don’t feel scared for myself, but scared of what I can offer. Alone, I’m barely able to remember to drink water but always remember to do the dishes before bed to make breakfast easier to have.

Lamenting through my own thoughts, I shake them away. There’s doctors to talk about this kind of thing, that’s what they’re there for. Support groups for mothers who don’t know what to do. The kids have taught me a lot but none of them except Erica were even under ten when we’d first met. When it’s your own child, it’s a whole different ball game. There will still be a team surrounding me even as the opponents team boo’s and hollers. Now it’s a waiting game to see if my pitcher is with me. 

I like to think Billy is a good man, not by any means by himself. Repaired as many relationships as he could, hate who he was before. He thinks before acting but I’d seen that look before, anger is normally a response to a much deeper and complex feeling. Fear, frustration, sadness. He’s been taught his whole life that the answer is to push those other things away, make room for hate, bigotry and self preservation. While I grew up in a different way, in a different world. Built for me to fail, built for me to resent motherhood as the only outcome for my life. The only thing a woman is good at, but doesn’t receive the credit for only the blame and the hard work it takes. To be loved by the things you can create but not the person you are. Billy is just as scared as I am, but I will not be the one to fix this. I will not be alone.

Masterlist

[xrag-dollx]

Guardian Angel...

~Kit Walker x fem! reader

𝒮𝓊𝓂𝓂𝒶𝓇𝓎: A thunderstorm was coming closer and Kit was nowhere to be found. When he'd return was unknown.

𝓦𝓪𝓻𝓷𝓲𝓷𝓰𝓼: Pretty much none (?) Just a comfort-fluff with a pinch of angst :3

𝓐/𝓝: English isn't my first language so sorry for any mistakes <3

You woke up. A storm was built up like a negative emotion coming closer. The wind, wild and pounding, almost unpredictable was raging outside the landside, combing the wheat and the grass in a obstinate manner, the wrathful thunder was one with its power of the sheer nature. A lightning bolt enlightened the sky for merely just a moment, as it danced a wild waltz so high.

"Kit?"

You glanced to your next but he wasn't there. Your bed, blank and left with bleakness was resting next to you instead. You were worried. Where was he?

In your dismay, you rushed through the house in your long white sleeping gown, as it softly caressed the wooden floor underneath your feet. You shouted his name for the hope he'd respond, an illusion of his voice was crossing your head, hearing him screaming your name, but your mind played tricks on you as the beloved voice of his couldn't be heard anywhere. In seeking desperation you rushed to every empty room of the building, just to find shallow places instead.

The rain crashed onto the rooftop as it produced ear-piercing noises. It frightened you...the weather frightened you... almost to death. Huddled up, you sat on the floor, crying out your shattered heart, waiting for Kit's return in despair. You felt so abandoned, a cold breeze of air hugged your presence as it made you shiver. Kit was gone, when he would make his return was only laid in the lap of time, yet you prayed for the good. All of a sudden, a lightning strike, bold and raging, bores into a birch within seconds. You let out a scream of fear, it echoes in the emptiness of your room, your body was trembling... tears of fright streamed down your pale skin, as it got painted by the water of emotions. Married to a depraved notion in your mind that your beloved husband was somewhere, outside, engulfed by storm and rain. A bitter feeling got spread in your stomach like a wildfire in rage. Suddenly, the door to your house crashed open, the rain was coming down in waves and flashing lights enlightened the night...

"Hey!...oh suga...c'mere"

Kit spoke, as he spotted you on the ground like a frightened stray cat, to catch you into his embrace, he was soaked to the bones but you couldn't care less. The one you loved the most has returned form the depths of darkness and ignited a fire inside of you with burning desire. You felt as vividness began to bloom like a flower in may in every part of your broken heart. You were clinging onto Kit like he's a fond memory of yours. You didn't want to let him go. Never, ever, again. You wanted to get fed with the tender love he's giving, it just made you insatiable.

"Shhhhh...it's okay, baby...I'm here now"

"Kit cooed as he softly combed your hair, holding you tightly in his arms like you're his biggest possession. His whispers worked like a remedy on you, washing away all the pain and sorrow within a blink of an eye. Kit noticed how sleepy you got as he picked you up bridal-style, taking you upstairs to the warm and beloved bedroom, gently laying you down the soft bed like a fragile doll made of porcelain.

"I'm here for you..."

He whispers, as he was taking your hand in his, kissing the velvety skin on the back of your hand as he's gently rubbing it with his thumb. The thunderstorm calmed down and Kit rested next to you, like he was guarding the angel you were.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

𝓣𝓪𝓰𝓼: @fear-is-truth, @doll3tt33, @evanchantingpeters, @am3ricanh0rrorwh0re

《xrag-dollx all rights reserved. Copying my work is prohibited.》

[kangshxrtie]

ch. 23 ⤍ left 4 dead

​​you switched the screen from the "starting soon" animation to your face cam, flashing a quick smile before going  into your introduction.

"i honestly have no idea what i'm doing today," you confessed to the stream, leaning back in your chair. "so it would be really great if one of my friends watching could hop on and play games with me." 

almost instantly, a message popped up in chat.

jenaissante am i one of your friends 👉🏼👈🏼

"i would assume so. would you like to play games with me, yunjin?"

jenaissante yes pls jenaissante i'm getting food rn jenaissante inv me though

you only saw the first message and didn't invite her, instead scrolling through the chat, searching for someone else.

_chaechae_1 can i play?

"yeah, of course, chaewon," you replied casually.

jenaissante how dare u say yes to chaewon when i asked u first

you squinted at the screen, confused. "wait, did you say something? i didn't see it."

jenaissante fake —permanently banned

your eyes widened. "wait, shit! i didn't mean to ban you, i was trying to check the logs!" you broke into a laugh as you quickly unbanned her.

jenaissante just say u don't fk with me

"i swear i didn't see it! you said you were getting food, then 'invite me' a second later. how was i supposed to know?"

jenaissante can't believe you hate me

"just get your food and join us," you said.

jenaissante okay

you hopped on a call with chaewon, brainstorming what games to play. the two of you tossed out random suggestions, but each idea was quickly shot down due to the number of players needed or a lack of interest in the game. finally, yunjin joined the call—still eating, so not much help in the decision-making process.

"let's play left 4 dead 2," you suggested, scrolling through your steam library.

"isn't that for four players?" chaewon asked.

"yeah, but how hard can it be to find one more?" you shrugged. with everyone in agreement, you immediately started looking for a fourth.

"i've got a fourth!" you announced.

"who?" yunjin asked, curious.

"just a girl i know," you said cryptically.

"what girl?" yunjin pressed.

"you'll find out when she gets here"

"wait... is it kazuha?" chaewon guessed.

"uh, no, she's busy today," you replied.

"oh, right," chaewon nodded in understanding.

suddenly, yujin joined the call with a loud ping, interrupting the conversation.

"oh, it's just yujin," chaewon said casually.

"just yujin?" yujin echoed, clearly offended.

"not like that!" chaewon chuckled. "y/n was talking about you like you were some random girl we'd never met."

"i literally said she's a girl i know, which isn't a lie," you defended.

you booted up the game and invited chaewon, yunjin, and yujin to your lobby. everyone picked their characters as you fiddled with the settings.

"what difficulty should i pick?" you asked the group.

"maybe advanced?" yujin suggested.

"or, you know, maybe normal?" chaewon said, her voice laced with caution.

"we can handle expert. we've got this," yunjin declared confidently.

"can we, though?" you asked, skeptical.

"of course! we're pro gamers," yunjin insisted.

"you know what? you're right. expert it is," yujin agreed, backing her up.

"i don't agree with this at all, but sure," chaewon muttered.

sighing, you set the difficulty to expert, not trusting yunjin or yujin at all but just wanting to see what happens.

user2 we'll see how long that lasts user3 "they're not even lasting a minute" is winning the polls by a landside rn user4 betting all my points on them losing rn

the game loaded in, and as usual, you all messed with the controls to get comfortable. scanning the ground, you grabbed a weapon and glanced at everyone else's characters.

"wait... why is chaewon's character kinda hot?" you remarked suddenly.

"huhhhh?" yunjin blurted, totally caught off guard.

"y/n, you can't just say stuff like that," yujin laughed, trying to hold it in.

"i'm serious!" you continued. "her character just backed it up on me. y'all need to see this from my point of view."

as the first wave of zombies swarmed in, everything fell apart in record time. chaewon screamed as she died almost immediately, yujin calmly took out a few zombies, while yunjin panicked because of chaewon's freakout—only to die herself. you were just trying to help, but it was too late. you all died in less than a minute.

you quickly went to adjust the difficulty. "normal or advanced?" you asked, trying not to laugh.

"we died so fast!" yunjin laughed, still in disbelief.

"we can handle advanced," yujin suggested.

"no, we cannot," chaewon said, her voice sounding genuinely scared.

you set the difficulty to normal for the sake of chaewon, who seemed like she was actually traumatized from the previous events.

"no, we cannot," chaewon said, her voice sounding genuinely scared.

"everyone on the roller coaster," yunjin instructed, already making her way up the tracks.

you followed, but when yunjin turned around, she noticed chaewon still struggling at the bottom. "she's down there alone. she's not gonna make it."

"i am!" chaewon yelled, her voice laced with panic as she fought off the swarm of zombies below, while the rest of you were already perched at the top of the roller coaster tracks, watching her struggle.

"you gotta get up here!" yujin called out, her tone urgent.

"i'm trying!" chaewon replied, breathless.

"she's actually not gonna make it," you observed dryly.

before long, zombies started appearing at the top of the tracks, forcing all of you to engage in a fight. yujin was downed causing yunjin to freak out and looked to see chaewon stuck below, trying to fend off zombies and ultimately getting downed herself.

without hesitation, yunjin leapt down to save her. "i'll save you, chaewon!" she shouted, helping her back to her feet.

as soon as chaewon was revived, she announced, "i have a defibrillator! i can save yujin!"

meanwhile, yunjin called out, "i'm about to die!" as she sprinted up the roller coaster tracks.

"please don't," you muttered as you yourself were downed.

"y/n!" yunjin screamed from the other side of the tracks, panic evident in her voice.

yunjin and chaewon fought desperately to fend off the incoming horde, trying to revive at least one of you. but in the end, yunjin got downed too, leaving only chaewon to fight.

"teamwork did not make the dream work, yikes," you commented, leaning back in your chair.

"that's toxic, y/n," yunjin groaned.

"i'm coming back!" yunjin exclaimed as chaewon managed to help her back up.

"please don't," you deadpanned.

they finally revived yujin, but the zombie horde was relentless. despite your best efforts, it wasn't enough, and you were all taken down by the overwhelming hoard. the level had to be restarted, but at least you managed to beat it on the second try.

now that you all were in a safe room, the group decided it was time for a quick break before the next round. you took this time to turn your attention to chat, seeing a chat from kazuha causing you to smile at it.

k_a_z_u_h_a__ ain't no way ur playing with my roommates & not me rn

"are you jealous?" you asked in a teasing tone.

k_a_z_u_h_a__ and if i was?

"i would have invited you, but you were busy," you replied with a grin.

k_a_z_u_h_a__ :( k_a_z_u_h_a__ still messed up

user2 should we leave 🤨

"i'll play games with you next time then."

k_a_z_u_h_a__ :) k_a_z_u_h_a__ that works k_a_z_u_h_a__ gotta film now... k_a_z_u_h_a__ i'll miss u

"bye, kazuha. go do your job," you said, waving at the camera with a smile.

once kazuha logged off, you responded to a few more questions about the game and joked with your chat before the break ended. then it was time to lock back in for the next round.

"chaewon, behind you!" yunjin shouted, swinging a baseball bat wildly at the zombie chasing after chaewon's character. "this thing's so fast!"

chaewon let out a scream once she finally noticed, firing her gun with her eyes squeezed shut. somehow, she managed to kill the zombie.

"i got it, chae!" yunjin said triumphantly, smacking the now-dead zombie one last time for good measure.

"oh wow, thanks a lot," chaewon replied sarcastically. "really saved my life there."

before yunjin could respond, a spitter grabbed her character. "wait, huh? chae, help!" she called out, struggling.

chaewon just burst out laughing, watching yunjin's character get dragged away.

"why are you laughing? help me!" yunjin begged, "my character's gonna die! do something!"

chaewon kept laughing, only stepping in after yunjin's health hit was completely down.

"i was actually dying, and you just stood there laughing like a maniac," yunjin grumbled. "even after i saved you."

"oh, that was funny," chaewon said, still catching her breath.

a little later, yujin came up to you, wielding a chainsaw as you took down the last zombie in sight only for yujin to swing the chainsaw at you.

"what the fuck!" you yelped.

"oh, sorry! thought you were a zombie," yujin said with fake innocence.

"no, you didn't. don't lie to me," you laughed.

"i'm serious, i couldn't tell the difference!" yujin insisted.

"yeah, sure," you replied, shaking your head.

eventually, you all reached the safe room, the mid-level stats appeared on screen, detailing the damage each of you had dealt. once your characters were back in view, everyone reloaded their weapons, patched up any wounds, and stocked up on ammo and supplies, prepping for the next onslaught.

"alright, last level. let's go," yunjin said with determination prompting you to open the door.

"yippee! last level!" chaewon cheered, her voice full of excitement.

"we're professionals now," yunjin boasted confidently, with chaewon echoing, "professional gamers!"

"seasoned at this point," yunjin added.

the mood was light as you ventured out, shooting the few zombies that outside near the safe room. things were manageable until chaewon's panicked scream rang out.

"behind us! oh god, they're behind us!"

user5 instant chaos 😭

you whipped around, guns blazing as yujin tossed a boomer bile into the horde, and you got out of there following behind chaewon who was now heading up some bleachers. as you were a prompt came up to start the stage lighting.

"do i start this?" yunjin asked, eyeing a prompt to activate the stage lights. before anyone could answer, she hit it.

"oh—we have to survive here," yujin noted, already scanning for a place to take cover.

"there's some medkits up here!" chaewon called out.

the notification flashed across the screen: rescue is coming! defend yourselves.

"alright! where are we holding out?" yunjin asked.

"under the main stage," yujin suggested, and both you and chaewon agreed.

with that, the fight began. molotovs flew, bullets sprayed, and zombies kept pouring in, all while the stage lights burst like fireworks overhead.

"yujin, behind you!" yunjin yelled, saving her from a sneak attack.

"thank you," yujin replied, barely catching her breath.

"i got the right side!" chaewon called out, steady in her role.

"i got all the sides... except for the ones i don't," yunjin quipped.

"we're literally destroying them," yujin remarked confidently. "this is easy."

"too easy," yunjin agreed.

just as the lights flickered out and the zombies seemed to stop coming, you were about to relax.

"that's... it?" you muttered.

"i knew we would end them," yujin said proudly.

you were about to reply when chaewon's voice cut through. "guys..."

"it's just one. we'll mow it down," yunjin said dismissively.

"yeah," chaewon echoed.

as you focused on the tank approaching, chaos struck again—a jockey rode yujin, dragging her health down fast. you quickly intervened, freeing her before returning your attention to the tank.

"wait... it's not dying," yunjin exclaimed in disbelief, continuing to unload bullets.

"he's so big," chaewon groaned.

"oh, wait, it is now!" yunjin cried as the tank finally fell, everyone cheering as victory seemed close.

but then, another swarm appeared. zombies flooded the bleachers, and yujin was slammed to the ground by a charger. chaewon, wielding an axe, rushed in to save her, only to face yet another tank. the group barely managed to set it on fire and take it down as the rescue helicopter appeared overhead.

another notification flashed across the screen: rescue has arrived! get aboard

you and chaewon scrambled up the bleachers while yujin held her own on stage, fighting off the remaining zombies. but just as she made it to you, chaewon was downed. yunjin ran to help but got downed herself.

yujin threw a molotov to clear the area but ended up setting both you and chaewon on fire in the process. "both chaewon and yunjin are down! we can't go without them," yujin said urgently.

"i'm coming, give me a sec!" you yelled as you fought through the flames to revive yunjin.

"just run to the helicopter!" you shouted once yunjin was back on her feet.

as you made your escape, yunjin got downed again. yujin, torn between survival and saving her friend, paused. "i can't leave without her!" she cried, fighting off zombies. but eventually, she gave in. "actually, i might have to leave her," yujin said, backing away.

"yujin! what the fuck!" yunjin shouted as yujin left her behind.

"sorry, i gotta put me first," yujin quipped as she headed to the helicopter with you and chaewon.

"wait, we can't leave without chaewon," you said.

"you right, we can't leave her, and by we i mean you two" yujin agreed staying near the helicopter, far from the danger.

"i have a defibrillator!" you said, rushing to revive yunjin.

"alright, i'll cover you," chaewon promised, while yujin hung back in her safe zone.

you called for help, taking damage while trying to get yunjin up. "wait, help me!"

chaewon hesitated but eventually stepped forward, just as yujin climbed into the helicopter. "pilot, you can leave now."

"what do you mean, leave?" you snapped.

before you knew it, the helicopter left with only yujin aboard. the sound of her triumphant laughter echoed in your headset.

"yujin, you left?!" chaewon's disbelief was palpable.

"ain't no way," yunjin muttered.

in memory of:

chaechae jenaissante gameryn

"i went to get a medkit for chaewon, and they killed me for it," yunjin said.

"in memory of us minus yujin's bitch ass" you said.

"don't worry, you'll be going in the autobiography for sure," yujin reassured like that meant anything.

"it's so on brand. yujin would leave us in a zombie apocalypse," chaewon sighed.

yujin just laughed in response.

"wow. you're not even gonna try and defend yourself?" you asked, incredulous.

"y'all wouldn't believe me anyway," yujin said casually.

"damn right! you left us!" yunjin exclaimed.

"if we ever end up in this situation for real, i'm sacrificing you first," you said firmly.

"fair," yujin responded, still laughing.

after the game, the group spent a few minutes laughing and recapping the best moments, mentioning yujin's betrayal and the chaos that ensued. once everyone said their goodbyes and left the call, you sighed in relief, finally able to settle in for some one-on-one time with your chat to debrief without the noise of the rest of the group. 

user6 yujin really said "every man for himself" lmao

user7 ofc yujin would be the one to leave

user8 yujin's betrayal arc, wow...

user9 left 4 dead (literally)

user0 no mercy, no loyalty, just vibes

user1 yujin's so real for that

“never inviting yujin to another lobby again,” you declared, shaking your head. you spent a few moments catching up on donations and responding to messages you missed during the game before wrapping up the stream with your usual outro.

ALL CHAPTERS !!! | NEXT CH !!!

[alexandraisyes]

I really want to thank you.

I've learned a lot about psychology and mental health from your blog. And it's helped me change how I talk about disorders a lot (not calling people and characters sociopaths/psychopaths/narcassists when they're a bad person, not making jokes about schizophrenia, stopping saying "im delusional", etc.) And honestly its not even that hard to do once I understand the why of it. Why should I call villains sociopaths automatically? Because obviously that villainizes Aspd. And then it just- clicks in my brain and yeah, for some things (especially the delusional one because I hear people say it all the time) I have to remind myself and correct myself, but just changing my way of thinking helps what I say

It also isn't even kind of an inconvenience?? Like sure, for soem things I have to figure out what to say instead, but tbh that just makes me think deeper on what actually is going on. Not demonizing disorders actually is helping my own mental health, its nice

Plus, you've actually helped me discover my love for psychology. Learning how the brain works is really interesting! And I want to help people. Plus I'm learning in a way that doesn't cause my anxiety. I have issues with seeing things that I relate to and automatically worrying that I have that disorder or whatever, and it's defiently getting better, but also the way you explain things doesn't trigger that warning alarm in my brain. It's straight forward, and often you're talking about things I don't even kind of relate too, which both helps me learn about how other people's brains work and let's me learn without worrying about myself

anyway- uhh TLDR that was just a lengthy way to say that your explanations and things have educated me and I really enjoy reading them (sometimes I physically can't bring myself to because they're long, but most of the time I can!!!)

Thank youuu. You've helped me learn more about others and myself <3

I have been marinating this in my mind for the past day, trying to figure out how to express how lovely of a feeling this brings me. I'm not exactly the emotional sort, so the immediate shock and then elation has long since passed, but the contentedness remains.

I cannot properly express the gratitude I feel, towards you and the universe, from this message. This is the kind of impact I've wanted to have on the world since I was very young. I would sit in my room as a little girl and daydream that I would write a novel or sing a song that was so expressive about pain and clarity and yes, psychology, although I didn't know the word for it, that it would shift people's mentalities, and make them understand why compassion is important. And reach the people who needed to hear it, and help them deal with their own hurt, and their own trauma, and let my words be a sort of healing factor in people's lives.

Never once did I ever think I'd achieve that through a tumblr blog.

And I have such a small amount of reach, such a small amount of influence in the grand scheme of things, but pebbles can cause landsides.

It's such a profound feeling to know that you have accomplished what you set out to do in even just a handful of people. That you have made a real difference to the net positive, like you've always wanted to. Everyone wants to leave a lasting legacy, an impression on people, that's just human nature, and some people will reach and reach and reach for that legacy and never be satisfied.

And I'm about to start getting really philosophical, so I'll cut it off here with a thank you. Thank you for telling me this. Thank you for letting me know that I have made a difference. I don't exactly have a sense of self for this knowledge to fall back on (a rather unfortunate consequence of my disorder), but I will cherish it regardless. Despite the fact that I have always wanted to make a difference, it never crossed my mind that I may actually reach that goal one day.

I'm glad my writings have helped you.