#Is anyone else ✨tired aesthetic✨

[citricacidprince]

...Mable stuck with bill timestuck, you say? I wonder if that would go better or worse than dipper being alone with bill.

Here to mention that I somehow only noticed your signature when it was next to fiddleford, and thought you were (rightly) calling him a prince. It took an embarrassingly long time for me to connect the dots.

Haha you’re not the first person to mistake my signature for actual writing so dw you’re good lol!

And as for my thoughts of Mabel and Bill in a Timestuck AU,,,

I may or may not have written a drabble in a mutuals DMs a few years back about a confrontation between Mabel and Bill and the aftermath of it! I also may or may not have just fixed it up and straight up doubled the word count haha-

Since I’m feeling a tad bit brave I’m gonna post the drabble under the cut for anyone to read along with two doodles I’ve done for it, I only ask that yall be nice to me since I don’t write very often and know I ain’t that good at it hehe-

Also I’m not lying this is like,,, 4707 words… I got possessed to write this haha

Before I begin!!! Important!!!

Trigger Warnings: Choking/Asphyxiation, harm to children, minor descriptions of small cuts and minuscule amounts of blood, verbal planning of commiting a murder/killing

(if I missed any please tell me!)

With that out of the way here's my stupidly long Timestuck AU drabble that's been on my back burner for years! The only thing you really need to know is that the twins time-traveled back after Weirdmagenddon of their own volition. Dipper is with Stan and Mabel is with Ford and Fiddleford. Mabel has been staying with the two for almost a month now and Fiddleford is the only one who knows she's a time traveler.

With the stage set, please enjoy!

💫—————————————🚩

It’s late into the night, Mabel is tossing and turning and can't go to sleep. Her mind is spiraling as she overthinks and worries about Bill, her brother, her Grunkles, everything. So at about 1AM she decides that she’s not going to bed anytime soon and gets up off the living room couch which she has called her new bed while staying with her younger Grunkle Ford and Fiddleford.

Despite it being the dead of night Mabel thought it’d be a good idea to just make something food related in hopes it would tire her out. Also, she figured it would be a fun idea since she knows Stanford is most likely still awake and probably hasn’t eaten in a while. She could make him something easy and sweet, like a batch of cookies, and give them to him as a gift! Who doesn’t like 1AM cookies?! If she doesn’t have the stuff to make that, eh, she’ll figure it out and make something else!

A bonus to this is that if Ford says he’s not hungry, a bold faced lie, she’d use her sweetest and biggest puppy eyes until he ate some. Maybe she could even convince him to go to bed and not stay up till 4AM!

The brunette starts making a batch of cookies in the cover of night, making sure to have plenty enough for Fidd's in the morning, and putting her entire heart and all her worries into the mix in hopes the oven would ease away the stress weighing down her mind.

Sure it took a while, but it would totally be worth it to see her young Grunkle's face light up in shock at the sight of a warm batch of cookies shoved into his face and getting crumbs on his nerdy notes!

Right as she was finishing up wrapping up three separate plates worth of cookies in a napkin with a pretty little bow, for the ✨aesthetic✨ she happily told herself, she hears a pair of heavy boots walk into the kitchen.

The voice of her, now young, Grunkle Ford calls out her name in the quiet kitchen. Just as she had expected, he was awake.

Before the excited brunette could whirl around and surprise Ford with the 1-2 AM batch of cookies she lovingly went and made by hand, his low voice rumbled out, “Could you grab me a mug? One from the cabinet.”

He sounded a little funny, like he just woke up. Mabel smiled as she could already picture Stanford’s bleary and tired face as he goes to make a cup of coffee with the mug he’s asking for. She lets out a small sound of exertion as she pushes herself onto the counter since she’s too short to reach the cabinets otherwise and gingerly opens the cabinet so it doesn’t squeak and pulls out a mug. Based on the small cracks and worn paint on the ceramic it seemed a tad old, the faded words of ‘Backupsmore 1973’ barely legible.

Just as Mabel turns around, about to lightly scold her young Great Uncle for drinking coffee at 2 AM instead of getting some rest, a large hand wraps around her little neck. She didn’t even have a chance to scream as she’s suddenly slammed into the now closed cabinet, the air knocked out of her lungs and her head spinning from the impact, a loud sound of ceramic shattering on the wooden floor echoing through the kitchen and Mabel’s ringing ears

A fearful confusion consumes her mind as she, unsure of what’s happening in her dazed state until she catches a glimpse of Stanford. Gone were the warm brown eyes she’s grown accustomed to, in their place were the sickly yellow slit eyes of a monster she knew all to well.

Bill Cipher.

“Shooting Star, there you are! I think you're getting a tad too comfortable around here! Let's fix that!"

Malice built in her throat as she spat out, her brows furrowed and her brown eyes glaring down his yellow ones, “Bill! You-”

“Ah, so you do know me! I assumed so, but wasn’t quite sure!”

The six fingered hand around her neck pressed a tad harder against the wooden cabinet behind her, making her wince from the pressure.

“Here’s the deal, Shooting Star, you’re being a massive thorn in my side.”

Her back was already aching from the impact of her getting slammed against the cabinet.

“Making Sixer second guess his trust in me with your insufferable kindness and child-like whimsy.”

Her sock-covered feet were slipping and sliding on the wooden countertop, legs uncontrollably trembling as her fingers gripped at Stanford’s large forearm in hopes of steadying herself.

“It was amusing at first but now it’s just annoying. So I need you,”

His hand tightened even more, making Mabel let out a sharp hiss of pain.

“Out of the picture.”

Mabel’s feet no longer are touching the countertop as Bill suddenly pulls her away from the cabinet, easily dangling her little body in the air and effectively hanging her. Panic instantly shoots through her and tears well up in her eyes as her airway is suddenly completely cut off, her little hands grabbing and clawing at her possessed great uncle’s forearm while her legs wildly kick at the air, too short to even graze against Bill’s chest.

Bill’s free hand raises up and idly taps his chin, as his musing over something indecisively, an wide and uncanny grin stretched across the possessed scientist’s face as he loudly questions, “Hmmm… how about… throwing you in the lake! If the water doesn’t kill you the cold air will!”

Mabel started to thrash around even harder, her heart pounding in her chest as fear coursed through every nerve in her body, her flight response in full gear as she tried over and over again to get out of Bill’s grip with no avail.

“Oooh! Or I could just tie you up and bury you in the snow! I hear frostbite is real killer these days!”

Blood was rushing to her ears; she could barely hear a word he was saying. All she could focus on was the panic bubbling in her chest and adrenaline pumping in her veins, screaming at her that she didn’t want to die.

It didn’t take long before her vision began to blur, her clawing hands and kicking feet getting more and more numb and slow with each passing seconds. She could faintly hear Bill say something about ‘throwing’, ‘roof’, and ‘classic!’ before she could feel herself almost completely clock out, vision fluttering in and out as her hand weakly claws at his arm one last time.

Just as she was about to give up completely, the polydactyl hand around her neck suddenly let go, sending Mabel unceremoniously crashing to the floor. She let in a large gasp of air, coughing her lungs out as air desperately tried to fill them once more. The brunette doesn’t even care about the small shards of broken ceramic cutting into her hands or shins, she was trying to make sure she didn’t accidentally start hyperventilating as drool and tears drip from her face to the floor with every sharp breath.

Mabel, disoriented and dazed, manages to glance up through strands of her long and curly brunette hair to see Ford still standing there with those disgusting yellow eyes, which were now staring off to space with annoyance clearly visible in his gaze.

"Geez Sixer, you chose the worst time to want your body back to 'test a new theory' huh?" He quietly mumbles under his breath, looking upset that his fun was being rudely ripped away from him.

Suddenly he stares down at Mabel, who was clutching her throat and panting heavily, brown eyes unable to stop crying. Despite this, despite all the pain and numbness that ran through her, she still found it in her to glare at the dream demon with as much animosity as she could muster while surrounded by ceramic shards and small prickles of blood.

"Well… we’ll just have to pick this up another time, won't we Shooting Star?"

The possessed body of Stanford Pines strolls towards the archway leading out of the kitchen, however before he leaves completely, he stops and whirls around with that same twisted smile Mabel vividly remembers seeing on her possessed brother’s face just a few months ago. "Oh, Shooting Star? Would you be a doll and clean up this mess? Wouldn’t want anyone getting hurt now, would we?"

And with one final cackle he left, making his way back downstairs to Stanford’s study, presumably to make it appear like he never left in the eyes of the oblivious scientist, leaving the little brunet alone on the floor to lightly grip her neck, wincing at the bruise that's bound to appear the next day.

She stayed there silently for what felt like hours but was only just a couple minutes, the adrenaline coursing through her veins slowly but surely fading away as the feeling finally came back to her numb fingers and toes, relieved that she isn’t hyperventilating anymore and she can actually breathe.

She eased herself off the cold wooden floor, her little body trembling the entire time.

Despite the feeling of spite coursing through her veins for that awful dream demon, he was right…, she really didn’t want anyone to get hurt… So instead of immediately going to fix herself up she spent the next 10 minutes sweeping up the broken mug and getting all the broken shards of ceramic into the trash.

Curse her and her big heart…!

When she was done it was about 2 AM, and it was now officially time to check the damage.

Before she left the kitchen she made sure to put the plates of cookies into the fridge.

She didn’t really feel hungry anymore.

With a couple of winces and hisses of pain she managed to tip toe herself up the stairs and to the bathroom, making sure she didn’t accidentally wake up Fiddleford by stepping on a loose plank or opening the door too loud. Once inside she gingerly pulls out the old timey medkit from under the sink and sits on the floor.

Well, technically the medkit was modern since it was the 80s…

Wah, Mabel! Not the time!

With a deep breath she gingerly treats the tiny cuts gracing her hands and shins, trying not to cry as she disinfects each cut just like Grunkle Ford taught her to at the end of the summer of plucked out mini pieces of ceramic embedded in her skin with a pair of tweezer like how her Grunkle Stan had taught her at the beginning of the summer (note from her past self, splinters are never fun).

Cleaning and applying band-aids to the cuts was the easy part, most of the bandages would be hidden under her sweater and the winter pants Fiddleford had gifted her during her first couple days staying at the shack.

It was her neck that was going to be hard to hide.

Mabel stood up and got on a step stool to look into the minor, immediately wincing at the sight of her bare neck, dark purple was already creeping in and bruising every bit of her neck. The brunette leaned closer to get a better look and almost whispered out one of the many swears she had accidentally learned from Stanford while living here.

There was a hand bruised into her neck, and it encompassed her entire neck.

She gingerly touched her neck and winced at the dull pain. Guess she wasn’t going to take off her sweater for about 2 weeks now… just 1 week if she was lucky enough…

She tentatively took a step outside of the bathroom and tiptoed down the hallway again, trying to not make a single sound. Just when she got to the steps she heard a door open behind her, causing her to instantly crouch down and hope that she was far enough down the stairs that her body was hidden from sight.

She dared herself to peek just above the top step to see Fiddleford standing outside of his room, stretching and yawning before closing his door and walking towards the bathroom Mabel just left, making the 13-year-old let out a sigh of relief that he wasn’t going to see her like this.

She knew she should probably tell Fiddleford what happened, but she just couldn’t. Maybe it was that childish fear of getting in trouble over nothing getting to her, or maybe it was the fear that her young Grunkle would be blamed for what Bill did.

Regardless, despite her better judgment, she kept her mouth shut and decided to hide her bruises from everyone else in the house, silently thinking of a way she could somehow protect herself from Bill.

She could practically hear Dipper yelling at her about how bad of an idea this was, but she was too shaken up to think of anything else…

So, she kept with the plan even as she shakily slipped a sweater over her large t-shirt she wore as a night gown and fell asleep on the couch, huddled in the corner in a ball as vivid nightmares haunted her fitful sleep, showing flashes of a possessed Stanford Pines throwing her off either the house or a water tower.

She woke up the next day to the warm smell of breakfast and the soft tones of Fidd's humming a tune in the kitchen, her body absolutely aching and a tad sweaty from the combo of the sweater and the fireplace keeping the room warm.

Mabel winced as she got off the couch. Yep… her back is definitely bruised.

She tentatively walked towards the open archway leading into the kitchen, silently calming her nerves and trying to put a smile onto her face. It helped that Fiddleford is making breakfast, she loves his food.

The kicthen was so empty when she first arrived but the southern man immediately starting keeping the place stocked when it was clear that she was going to stay there for a while. He also insistent on making her a meal 3 times a day since she was a ‘growin’ lil’ girl’. Because of her memories of Fiddleford being ‘Old Man McGucket’ were much more prominent in her brain it was easy to forget that he was once a father, but in those domestic moments when he doted and fussed over her it was clear that he was a good one.

Well, when he was sane that is…

She quickly shook off the bleak memory.

Happy thoughts, happy thoughts, happy thoughts…

She let out a low breath as a wide smile covered her face, her round cheeks rosy as she happily skipped inside.

Fiddleford perked up at the sound of Mabel walking inside, smiling as immediately spoke with a fond voice, "Ey there sweetpea, sleep well?" He idly glanced behind to see Mabel in her baggy t-shirt/sleep gown as well as a sweater on top of that, making him raise an eyebrow as he playfully asks, "Did someone get' cold last night?"

"Just a little bit." Mabel playfully replied back, unable to stop the wince that crossed her face at the sound of her hoarse voice.

Fiddleford, who was already done making breakfast, immediately whipped his head around at the sound. "Honeybee, are ya' alright?"

She lightly coughs into her fist a couple times and passingly remarks, “I’m fine, it's just morning gunk! Just need some water, haha!” Trying to sound as nonchalant as possible.

Fiddleford still had a suspicious look in his eye as he looked over the little lady before deciding to let her off easy with this one, grabbing a rag and wiping his hands while replying with a quiet, “Alright, if ya say so, sunshine…”

He quickly pours Mabel a glass of water and then grabs a plate of bacon and pancakes. “Fer you, made just how you like it,” Mabel sits down in her chair as Fiddleford places the glass of water in front of her and a plate of pancakes and some bacon that is extremely burnt. “Burnt in a volcano.”

The brunette drinks some water first, happy to note that it actually does ease the pain in her throat! After that she eagerly grabs a burnt piece of bacon and shoves it into her mouth, loving the way flakey black residue smears onto her fingers and the overwhelming taste of what can only be described as ‘BURNT’ fills her mouth. She muffles out, “It’s perfect!” In between bites as Fiddleford chuckles at her antics and makes himself a plate. “Yer such an odd lil’ duck, honeydew! Only kid I’ve ever met who wanna me ta’ burn their meal!”

Mabel immediately shoots back, pointing at Fiddleford with a mouth full of bacon, “Tahts cause ohther peowple are COWERDS!!!”

The lanky man lets out a full on belly laugh as he grabs his plate and sits at the table, the two beginning to talk about anything that crosses their mind.

Stanford wasn’t going to join them for breakfast. He’s usually asleep at this time or buried in whatever notes he was currently writing.

…Mabel feels a little bad that she's kinda happy he wouldn’t join them… Her throat feels like it’s constricting all over again at the thought of those sickly yellow eyes and horrid laughter…

At some point while eating, Fiddleford makes a joke that makes Mabel loudly laugh, the sudden shout of laughter causing her to wince and try to grab at her throat. She stops herself a couple inches short of the grab and quickly puts her hand back down, but the damage was already done.

Fiddleford, concern coming back at full force, puts down his fork and immediately asks with a concerned tone, "Honey, is ‘ere somethin' wrong with ‘ur neck?"

Sweat began to bead on Mabel’s forehead and she tried to immediately brush off the concern with a not so convincing, "Whaaaaat, psh, nah!"

He raises an eyebrow at the clearly nervous little girl. "Mabel, if yer' hurt I'd like to know."

She starts to fidget in her seat, fingers wrapping together and her brown eyes darting away. "Look, it's not thaaaat bad you don't gotta worry about it-"

At the confirmation that she is indeed hurt makes him sit up and shoot back, "Well tha' just makes me MORE worried bout it!"

Unable to come up with anymore excuses Mabel plays with a fork in front of her, eyes locked with her plate. Fiddleford let out a soft sigh and leans closer to the brunette across the table and rests his hand on hers, a kind smile on his face as he gently adds on with that fatherly tone that immediately made Mabel feel better, "Darling, it ain't gonna get better if ya’ don't lemme help. I promise I ain’t gon’ get mad, ya hear?"

Mabel tentatively glanced up at the southern man’s soft green eyes and could tell he meant every kind word.

So, despite her promising to keep her injuries a secret, she takes a deep breath and nods her head, gingerly taking off the thick hand-made sweater to leave her neck and bandaged up arms exposed to the world. The lanky southern man’s eyes seem to grow more horrified every passing second.

"Jesus, Mary, and Joseph-"

Fiddleford jumps up from the table, almost making his plate fall off while doing so, quickly rounding the table and crouching in front of the brunette with green eyes filled with so much worry and horror.

He found himself fussing over the girl who had easily wormed herself into his and Ford's hearts and found himself growing even more sickened at every bruise and cut he found, though nothing could compare to that sinking feeling of dread he felt looking at Mabel's bruised neck.

He cupped the brunette’s face and could feel tears well up in his eyes as he stuttered out a confused, "W-wha'..., Mabel wha' on earth happened-" His heart breaking trying to even comprehend what could have happened to her.

On the opposite end, Mabel could feel her heart swell at Fidd's fatherly fussing, but tried to brush it off the best she could, not wanting him to worry about her.

"I'm fine really! I just, uh… tripped down the stairs…? …Yeah! Didn't want to worry you, haha!"

Fiddleford, who suddenly stopped paying attention to what Mabel was saying, let his eyes looking closer at the girl's neck before they widened in a horrifying realization.

"I… Is tha' a hand…?"

A rush of panic suddenly runs through Mabel as she tries to come up with some excuse to throw him off, something, anything!

"Fidd’s it's FINE! I just… uh… wore a sweater that was too tight…?” Goodness she’s screwed, even she was aware of how unsure she sounded.

Fiddleford still wasn’t paying attention. Instead one of his hands lowered from her rosy cheeks and ever so slightly touched her neck with the lightest of touches. His green gaze was analytical as finger traced down the bruised skin, talking to himself so quietly that even Mabel almost didn’t hear him as he quietly began to count.

“One, two, three, four, five, s-”

The blond cut himself off with a sharp inhale through his nose as the look of worry that had previously graced the southern man's face suddenly disappeared and was replaced with a look Mabel had never seen on his face before.

It was a quiet anger. The kind of anger that's terrifying to witness as it bubbles from deep inside but you refuse to let it show on your face, even as your hands begin to tremble and your vision goes red.

Without saying a word Fiddleford stood up and stayed completely silent, unable to say a word for about 10 seconds while his face was blank and unreadable. Finally, Fiddleford looked down at Mabel and gave a kind smile that didn't fully reach his eyes.

"Sweetie, could ya' stay here a sec? I have something importan' I need tha’… discuss… with Stanferd."

After finishing that statement he gently patted the top of her brunette head and walked out of the kitchen archway, turning the corner and heading up the stairs that lead to Stanford's room, walking with such silent intensity that it kinda frightened her.

After a couple moments of staying frozen in her chair she finally managed to shake off the feeling, realizing she had to stop Fiddleford! As scary as it would be seeing Stanford again after last night's… incident… she couldn't just let Fiddleford go confront Ford without the full story!

She sprang up from her chair and winced at the pain radiating from her back. Yep! Still definitely bruised!

Mabel rushed out of the kitchen and up the stairs. She stumbles to a stop at the end of the steps as she sees Fiddleford standing outside Ford's door, just as quiet as he was downstairs. He raises his hand and gives a firm echoing knock and she could faintly hear her young Grunkle respond with a strong, "Come in!"

She hates that she shivers a bit at his voice.

She hates that she's a little bit afraid of him.

Fiddleford doesn't respond and instead just opens the door and then quietly closes it behind him. The door doesn’t close all the way which makes a sliver of light from Ford's bedroom/study shine against the floor in the hallway.

Well... Fiddleford hadn't broken any windows or started yelling, so maybe, just maybe, he's going in there to calmly talk out the problem with Ford? Well, that was more wishful thinking on Mabel's part. She HOPES they will just, talk it out, and no one will get hurt...

A loud crash and shout echoed through the hallway.

A girl could dream can't she?

Mabel sprints to Stanford’s door, tripping over herself the whole way, and yanks open the heavy wooden door as quickly as she could.

When she finally pries it open she’s greeted with the sight of Fiddleford in the middle of trying to choke out Stanford, while Stanford is leaning against one of his smaller wooden cabinets, pushing Fidds away (to the best of his ability) with his foot, clutching his very bloody nose in confusion.

Mabel rushes in and pushes the southern man away from her bleeding Great Uncle to the best of her ability but Fiddleford upon seeing Mabel finally backs off from trying to murder Ford, but the look of pure anger firmly remains on his face.

Ford looks at Fiddleford with pure confusion as he pushes himself off the small wooden cabinet, clutching his bleeding nose all the while.

"F, what on earth has gotten into you!"

Fiddleford stared back with his mouth agape, absolutely gobsmacked, before finally yelling back, "Wha'- what's gotten into ME?! What's gotten into YOU Stanferd Pines!"

Fidds pushed past Mabel and jabbed his finger into the brunet’s chest.

"She's a lil girl?! How DARE you even lay a FINGER on her!"

"F what on earth are you talking about?!"

Fiddleford roughly grabs Ford's shoulders and pushes him to look towards Mabel with a surprising amount of force.

"SHE'S what I'm talkin' bout! Stanferd Filbrick Pines who gave you tha' idea ya' had tha' GODDAMN right to even lay a FINGER on her-"

Stanford couldn't focus on the rant Fiddleford poured into his ears instead his eyes state frozen on the disgusting purple mark staining Mabel's neck.

"Mabel… who-"

Stanford knelt next to the sweet girl who reminded him so much of Stanley in his youth and felt a familiar pang in his chest. That feeling he'd feel whenever Lee came home covered in bruises. That feeling to protect… and to hurt anyone who dares to hurt them.

"Sweetheart… who did this? What happened?"

Fiddleford scoffed. "Ya should know."

Ford shivered at how cold F had sounded. Out of all of his years of knowing him, Fidds had never sounded like this.

Then the meaning of those words finally hit him.

Stanford rushed to stand up and looked back to Fiddleford's furious eyes with his own look of disbelief.

"Y-... You think I did this?"

Fiddleford's eyes didn't change in the slightest.

"Ya'. Ya' I do."

"We've known each other for years, we went to college together, I went to your wedding, you are easily my best friend. Do you honestly think I'm capable of doing something like this?!"

"I used ta'," Fidds crossed his arms. "Now I ain't so sure."

Ford didn't know HOW to feel. This felt like a betrayal but not in the way Stanley's felt. He also felt offended. And hurt. And so many other emotions that were swirling in his chest.

"How? How did you even get it in your head that I had something to do with this!? How could you look at me and even IMAGINE me hurting her?! I can't even imagine myself hurting her! She's-"

"Hand."

Ford froze from his rant.

"What."

"Yer' tha' only one who coulda' done it. How do I know? Hand."

"Ya' always go on an' on about the statistics of someone' being polydactyly. About how different ya' are."

"I want ya' to look at how many fingers are on that handprint on 'er neck, look me in tha' eye, and tell me who's most likely tha' guilty party."

Stanford froze, his face turning white at the realization. He didn't need to turn around and investigate the bruise on Mabel's neck. He now knows it had 6 fingers. When you put all the facts together, one thing is clear.

He IS the most likely person to have done it.

But there's a problem with that.

He DEFINITELY didn't do it.

He glanced back at Mabel, who seemed to be nervously pulling at her nightgown the entire time. After a moment she finally glances up, but after looking into his brown eyes for less than a second she quickly looked back down.

He didn't do it. He knows he didn't.

But if he didn't, why did she look so scared of him?

He didn't do it…

…Didn’t he…?

❔—————————————❓

Now this is a bonus doodle based on an idea I had for the aftermath of this! Stanford is stuck mulling over this in his room and when he finally leaves he notes that Mabel isn't asleep on the couch like usual. So of course he freaks out and assumes she ran away, running all over the house in hopes of finding her. He runs upstairs to Fiddleford’s room and knocks frantically on his door to get him to help him find the missing girl.

Fiddleford opens the door looking annoyed and tired. When Stanford says he can’t find Mabel and that he’s looked everywhere the southern man cuts him off by instantly replying “I know where she is.” That instantly calms down Ford but he looks confused as he asks “You do?” To which Fidd’s opens the door a little bit more to show Mabel asleep on his bed.

Stanford lets out a soft ‘Oh.’ And just stands there, looking awkwardly at Fiddleford for a moment before trying to break the tension with a weak chuckle and asking “Did she want to have a sleepover?” The blond doesn’t even hesitate to reply back, “Yeah. Because she’s scared of you, Stanford.” And closing the door on the brunet’s face.

Stanford doesn’t move for what feels like forever before he heads back to his room, feeling a little sick.

Anywho, I’m done now!!!

I’m happy and sorry you read through all of that, you can leave now! 💥💥💥

[bloopitynoot]

Reading SVSSS: Chapter 3

For those who don't know, I am reading SVSSS for the first time and sharing my thoughts!

If you have not read it, there will be spoilers! Consider this a warning.

Also- if you want to follow along, I am aiming to post updates daily. You can find all the posts in the tag bloopitynoot reads SVSSS. You can also check out the intro post for context on my read.

oh, that's good, he's (Shen Qingqiu/Shen Yuan) not dead p135

also not related to my read, but this time I am actually writing at my table (instead of cocooned in a blanket on my couch) so hopefully these note are easier to read (Read: I am trying to have neater handwriting for ✨aesthetic✨). All I need with my notes, book, and tea is a candle and i'd be living my ancient academic fantasy.

If anyone wants to know this chapter is accompanied by a white tea that tastes like loquats. It's my favourite nostalgic tea. My family used to travel south when I was small and my grandparent's house there had a loquat tree. I haven't had loquats in over a decade (canada lol) but this tea tastes jut like them.

Anyways! Back to SVSSS!

Give me patience: the amount of dislike I have anytime Ming Fan is present p135

oh dang, this boy can cook! p138

Re: this boy can cook- Bye LOL "Luo Binghe's excellent cooking skills were his foremost lady-killing technique." p138

boo, I am upset that the Abyss scenario still needs to happen (But I get it, of course it can't be that easy- we do need plot for this book) p139

I can't XD he really is falling into the plot/character of Protagonists Love Interest. First the congee cooking and no the "Poison cure" p142

WAIT. THE CURE FOR THE POSION. wut p143

RE: WAIT: I am crying LOL

But like could he 👀 "Like, he knew that the going at it with the protagonist could have cured the poison, but like he could do that! Could he? Ha ha ha ha..." p145

Not Liu Qingge over here thinking Shen Qingqiu is possessed (not really wrong though) p147

once again we have Ming Fan -> honestly I would not be surprised if he ended up the new villain/scum character role p148 there is nothing likeable about him

this line is killing me "Shen Qingqiu was astoundingly oblivious to the fact that, thanks to the divine wingman abilities of his useless teammate, Ming Fan, Luo BInghe's favor has again risen to a new high" p.150

Oh god, he's in Luo Binghe's dream world. I am so nervous for this. p. 152

Dang. Why so many deductions for failure -1000 is a LOT for him p154

okay but this dream subplot is feeding my theory that Shen Qingqiu is switching character roles from villain to Love Interest p155

Oh no :( not his childhood bullies p160

omg and now his mom's death p161

Shen Qingqiu has been taking a constant beating for 164 pages- how is he not dead p164

LOL Shen Qingqiu really said "i'm not paid enough for this emotional labour" p167

Also Shen Qingqiu "I finished my friendship performance; I can finally leave work now" p169 what a vibe

Even the Dream Demon Lord is over how much Luo Binghe talks about Shen Qingqiu (p172)

uuuugh the foreshadowing RE: if you don't learn the demon path and the seal breaks you are basically fucked p.173

You tell that demon, Luo Binghe! RE: "right now, you are discussing terms with me, and you are free to say anything...but if you harm Shizun, any agreement is void!" p177

LOL "Aura of Badassery" p177

Shen Qingqiu after a very bad no good series of days "pls I dont want to see you omg leave me alone I am v tired" p179 this guy can't catch a break

The dichotomy of Shen Yuan acting in this though. Outward: I definitely can handle this. Inward: I'm so fucking scared, I do not got this. Is so real p180

Shen Qingqiu "I want this kid to remain optimistic and feel positive with his heritage (so he does not turn evil and mass murder me and everyone else)"Luo Binghe "I am going to be the strongest of strong possible so that I can protect Shen Qingqiu" p182

Oh gods, not him asking him to move in with him (to basically have a servant but like Luo Binghe has just had his entire life changed) p185

okay so age check- suddenly he's 15??? I thought this kid was 14 like 3 days ago?? p186

Points to Shen Yuan though for noting that how Luo Binghe was being treated was child abuse. p188

YAY! He's going to train with Meng Mo (also it made me laugh at how pissed Meng Mo is about not having the teacher title) p190

That's all for this chapter!

next one aiming for tomorrow :D

[jestanotherclown]

The Rules Of Engagement Are Really Quite Simple

Absolutely no minors allowed. Helluva Boss/ Hazbin Hotel are adult shows so you must be at least 18 to interact. Minors will be blocked on sight and if you don't have your age in your bio or somewhere on your blog(s), I'm going to assume you're a kid and you'll be blocked. Mun is 21+

Mutuals Only please. I will answer questions and converse with non-moots but no threads.

Do not reblog/ comment/ interact on shit you're not apart of. This is one of the quickest ways to get yourself blocked from my blog.

Do not bug me about replies. If I forgot to answer, remind me after a week. Tumblr probably ate it or I'm stuck/don't have muse. Send it to me if I don't respond in a week.

Give me something to work with if you ask to plot/play with me. If I can't work with what you gave me, I'll let you know and if you still don't give me something to work with, I'm ignoring you. I'm not begging anyone to cooperate with me. And if you keep giving me shit I can't do anything with, I'm blocking you. End of story.

If I block you, don't come to another blog of mine and ask why. I don't owe you an explanation. If I block you, it means DNI with me anymore.

Don't Godmod, Spotlight, metagame or anything else like that.

If you ask to plot/play with me, please have basic knowledge of the RPC and how it works. If you ask to RP, I'm going to assume you know what you're doing.

Plotting with OCs is absolutely mandatory. Especially if I don't know your character well. Don't just throw your character at me and expect me to know how to respond. Plot with me first.

Plotting is preferred in general but not required outside of OC interactions.

Fizzarolli is GAY. He's canonically with Asmodeus but is open for shipping with MALE CHARACTERS ONLY. Do. Not. Force. Your. FEMALE. Muses on him. I have had this problem on my Angel blog and I will not put up with it anymore.

Don't steal my starters. Point blank period.

Do not spam like my open starters. Respond to it. That's what they're there for.

NON RP BLOGS ( UNLESS YOU'RE A MAIN FOR AN RP SIDEBLOG), BLANK BLOGS AND PORN BLOGS ARE UNWELCOME HERE.

Don't be afraid to talk to me OOC. If I come across as mean, I apologize but I am very tired of my rules being disrespected so I'm over clarifying for the people in the back. Feel free to chat with me, I promise I don't bite. Fizz might though 😜

Mun does not equal muse. Remember that.

I cannot and will not write with those that write in first person, chat style or script style RP. I can't respond to it and it's just a general pet peeve of mine. Please don't write this way if you plan on playing with me. I will not interact with you if you do.

READ MY RULES BEFORE INTERACTING WITH ME FOR FUCK'S SAKE! I don't put these here for the ✨ Aesthetic ✨

Send in one of my rules as a password if you read and understood this post

[degrees-of-fuck]

good day lilac, how r you, can i get more clara fun facts, she cutie 🤲🤲🤲

Good day 2 u Also and thank u ugyhkjn <3 <3 I'm pretty bleh and tired lately tbh, but very much in the mood to go on a ramble about my brain blorbos

You Sure Can ✨ puts her into your open hands

Clara has high purity due to her just kind of. Continuing to be a virgin I guess. And because she's gotten very good at Distracting things from penetrating her in any sense. As a result, she's Occasionally spotted with a faint halo - something she considers to be a sick, sick joke at her expense. She knew god had a cruel sense of humour, but damn.

I feel like maybe one or two people are capable of telling whether she's joking or serious most of the time, unless she's actively forcing herself to emote for some reason. So she says a LOT of out there shit with a look of total sincerity. This may or may not be one of the reasons her peers generally dislike her. She's fuckin weird and hard to read. (Not to mention a Nerd)

I once had the mental image of Clara filling milk bottles with her tit milk and selling them - which led to the mental image of Bailey using her milk for Orphanage Food Stuff rather than having to buy it, because why the fuck wouldn't they save money by exploiting their charge? (I mean she's already their cashcow)

One time in my game she tried to stand up for Sydney with 0 intent of getting Physically involved, but this 'somehow' lead to her getting beaten up. Which lead to particularly violent molestation, predictably. Right in front of Sydney. They did not notice and were just sort of acting like they were fighting and never seemed to really Notice what was actually happening there?? I guess their glasses were broken? Either way this really does feel like the perfect instance to describe the thought process that lead Clara to want to corrupt them

Botany Nerd Botany Nerd Botany Nerd Botany Nerd

While I think Closetgoth Corrupt Sydney has a pretty different aesthetic to her, I do imagine it has the odd shared element and I like the idea of them sharing certain accessories, or Clara giving them a couple things to get their collection started.

Fun Fact: u should pick her up and fling her into the ocean

Because she cares about fashion (or rather, her own fashion. not much one to keep up with what anyone else is doing) I feel like she has a slowly, but constantly growing collection of cowbells.

At the moment I saw this ask I was looking for sims cc to make her in my game again. Not really a fact about her, I just thought it was neat.

Her ears and tail are the most expressive parts of her I think? With their flapping and twitching. Even then though, she keeps them under good control around most people. (First time Robin was immediately able to tell she was lying about some dumb shit due to the movements of her tail giving it away, she had a big old panic attack. She REALLY relies on Dishonesty Powers. Had to re-learn a bit when new tics showed up.)

Even with her glasses she has pretty bad vision, tbh. She's not super near or farsighted, it's just... Bad. General low vision.

For Sims Reasons, I’ve been trying to think of what surname the orphans that have always been at the orphanage might have (So not Robin in my head. I imagine they came later, thus seeing PC as ‘older’ despite being the same age.) I thought for a while, before just deciding to go off of the fact that the forest is nearby, which is apparently a fairly common basis on which to name an orphan hoard. So Clara’s full name is Clara Woods.

[ravenadottir]

What social media do you think each of the S2 cast members prefer? I'm thinking TikTok for Chelsea, TikTok and YouTube for Bobby (he bounces between both), Instagram for Shannon, Lottie and Elisa, not sure for anyone else.

islanders and their preferred social media platforms

bobby. definitely youtube and tik tok as well. whenever he shows up on twitter or instagram he's being a crackhead or cute-baiting, respectively. gary leaves a comment on every single pic of food bobby posts. "again?!"

carl. no social media unless he's photobombing (which it doesn't happen on purpose). mc might be the one posting cute pictures of him but he's only interested in corresponding with his d&d mates or making an appearance on official pictures for his company's account.

Chelsea. definitely tik tok and she's known for her cute/crackhead energy. you can catch her doing some dances from time to time but she mostly focuses on rambling about things she finds weird.

elisa is a goddess of social media. posting on time, good content, no repetition, instagram and tik tok presence the most, not to mention her bread and butter youtube, but she's not coming to twitter a lot unless it's to retweet stuff.

gary. crackhead energy on twitter, thirst energy on tik tok, "boyfriend-baiting" on instagram. that's it, he just wants those dm's and people to slide into them, even if he has no intention of ever replying.

henrik. instagram is all about promoting his classes and the ✨nature aesthetic✨, tik tok is for the brief videos he would like to show people about his adventures. he definitely has a nickname on social media because the majority of his followers can't pronounce his name... something like "hot jungle guy".

hope. twitter to talk about current issues and causes, instagram to do the same but from time to time to engage in a selfie or two. i reckon she's a captive guest on elisa's channel whenever she wants to discuss beauty products for deeper complexion.

ibrahim. instagram and tik tok as well. respectively for the thirsty pics and videos of his practices and matches, besides working out routines. tik tok to him is a life changer because there's a limit to how much he has to talk and it's perfect for him.

kassam. concerts and behind the scenes on instagram and teasing videos on tik tok. he knows those veiny hands are very much welcome and he shows them constantly. he might even have a series of those just doing normal things but focusing on his hands.

lottie. an anon once said "she's probably doing tarot reading on tik tok" and i have to agree. she might do some thirst traps but focuses a lot on her astrology stuff as well. instagram is for the parties, gatherings and outfits of the day. rarely now she focuses on makeup but they make an appearance from time to time.

lucas. he doesn't like social media but he can't deny he likes the attention, particularly when someone posts a picture of him and he gets comments like "who is that?" on it. i wish he had more presence but if he's not in a couple he only makes appearances to talk about serious stuff like registering to vote or the vaccine.

marisol. tries her best with pictures on instagram but is mainly on twitter, seeing and retweeting political stuff and trying her best to engage in the conversation. might become a meme because she misunderstood a trend or two.

noah. not grand or very present unless someone is there to push him. he tries instagram for a while but ends up taking selfies in the same pose and gets tired of it. twitter might be more interesting to him but he forgets he has an account.

priya. given she's opening her own business, and designing, it's possible to catch her on instagram with ootd's and new products arriving at her boutique (headcanon information). also, her twitter is the biggest mess of subjects, there's music, feminism, memes, her comments on threads are gold though.

[strywoven-moved]

@lionfated​ : don’t need to if you don’t want to! AAAA ✨

PROMPTED.

brother , you can tell me i don’t need to , but i will anyways !  you always seem to make posts along the lines of , “i’m so surprised everyone is willing to write with me” & i am sincerely not sure where that doubt comes from.  have you sat down & read your posts ?  looked over your interactions with others ?  i’m afraid i’ll have to agree with everyone else on this , it’s no WONDER to me that people are looking forward to writing with you !  plus , you don’t need to strive to match the caliber of writing we give you , lucian , you already have a lot of your own ; the amount of absolute love & care & introspection you’ve poured into this ONE muse is something i will never get tired of seeing whenever i happen to catch you crossing my dash ( but i will go ahead & slam that onto all your blogs while we’re here ; you capture the voices of all your muses very well no matter the topic presented & i will always admire you for that ) .  i love seeing the evolution of your aesthetics & your art is so lovely.  i don’t have to mention this , really , but i’m always intimidated more by artists than anyone else ; that’s a talent i gave up a long time ago so i could write better , but it’s always wonderful to see someone be able to “dual-wield” writing & drawing like you can !  we love to see it.

you know , i’ve made my rounds in the RPC for a long time , & while i can’t say i’ve encountered you prior to this current run i’m making now , i want to make it clear : i’m very glad & i’m very GRATEFUL we get the opportunity to have our muses interact ; thank YOU for taking a chance on my muses ( both on my ocs & my divergent canons that , even now , i still cannot rightly say i’ve got any confidence in writing ) .  i adore our interactions ! each & every single one of them.  i look forward to seeing how these 3 dynamics progress !  however , given how many drafts you hold at any given time , i always tend to hesitate to send you things !  if i had anything “bad” to say , it would be that perhaps you tend to get in your own way when talking to some of us.

[pixeles]

@Izzy’s Dag-Dag The Artist… Tag

By @morgynemberisagenderfluiddaddy​

Tag Tag @poisonedsimmer AGAINNN~ Thanks for the tag I'm glad you include meeee! (◍•ᴗ•◍)✨

~ Rules ~

Show us a rendition of yourself in your own art! Can be anything! Sims render? Random stick figure? Picrew? Go nuts! (Just be sure to tag the artist if you use someone else's picrew!!!!) Tag the blogs you want to know, and don't be a dick that's it! Also, feel free to answer as vague or in-depth as you want. And if you don't want to answer a question for any reason just don't vibe with it! Skip it if you wanna! Also make sure you tag me and use #dagdagtheartisttag so I can see it!!!!!!!!

~Questions~

1.) Do you prefer to be referred to by your name or blog name?

Umm, call me by the blog name or "pix" if you want it to be shorter

2.) Where are you from?

Of this planet <(￣︶￣)>

3.) Do you have pets? 

Yep, a bitter little four-legged furry companion. I love him and my friend does not, it is an unrequited love. He loves to show me his beautiful teeth and fangs every time I'm around him (Please don't get me wrong, I don't mistreat him or anything like that, he's just like that, I won't tell the story)

4.) Tell us about your "dream"

Although traveling is very tiring (yes, I know) I would love to know many places (I already have a mental list lol), to know new cultures! since when you die the only thing you take with you (of course) is what you have lived, what you have experienced, enjoyed, learned in life.

I do not know if it is considered a dream, it is simply something I want to do, but if I do not achieve it, I will simply not feel frustrated

5.) Aside from art, what are your hobbies?

I love playing music, now I am trying to learn to play new instruments, draw, also a few years ago I loved to practice martial arts, they are tough but great! for X reasons I had to leave them, but I hope to get back to them, one day.

6. )Does anyone irl know about your blog?

Nope, a friend knows that I have Tumblr but she has no idea what it is or what it is for.

7.)Do you know anyone from your blog irl?

No...

8.) What are some fun facts about you?

Funny... Well, I am quite a case 😅 (or so they tell me), the truth should be answered by someone who knows me because I would not know how to tell you ... ummm, I could sometimes release some stupid comment that is irrelevant and that people laugh of that (without the intention of being funny). I forget the names of the people and I was embarrassed later yeah I'm a little clueless 😬

9.) What’s your day job?

¯\_( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)_/¯

10.) Do you have a celebrity look alike?

Mmm ... I'm unique, nobody looks like me 😎✨, HAHAHA just kidding, that I don't know..

11.) What's your aesthetic?

Simple. I like everything. So it may be very varied.

12.) What kind of artist are you?

Art...For art the first thing that comes to mind is drawing.So, those who draw with pencil and paper?

13.) How did you get into your form of art?

I have caught inspiration from other people and their style, things that I see on the internet that catch my attention and I suppose that all that becomes ... something?. I would not know how to define it.

14.) What do you watch/listen/read/anything else while you create?

Normally (if I am very focused) I listen to quiet instrumental solo music as a LoFi for example. But I like almost all genres of music.

15.) What is your favorite of your own creations so far? 

Well I would say that I have no favorites at the moment

16.) How would you describe your art style?

I don't have an artistic style hahaha I catch things from one place to another, I put it all together and that's it. Anything could come out, a vomit with glitter and with beautiful things for example.

17.) What is more satisfying to you coloring or outlining? 

Outline i guess

18.) What meme would you use to describe yourself?

19.) What character from any media form do you most identify with?

Hmmm...I was thinking about this question for a while but I don't know...

20.) If you were on the run, what would you change your name to?

Alex. I have my reasons

21.) Have you ever or do you want to change blog names?

I did it several times, it is difficult for me to choose something

22.) God forbid Tumblr decides to pull a MySpace and lets us have page songs, what song would you choose? 

It would be some instrumental solo song

23.) Oh yeah, I'm still on the MySpace train and I'm starting discourse! Who's your top 8?

Call me stupid but I did not understand this question very well and the truth is, I have not had MySpace, I just found out about the existence of this, so in response to this I will say the ones I like And they seem great to me!!. No order is specific.

🦝Racconium

🌆Magic-bot

🌌Darte77

🗻Poisonedsimmer

🏙️Natalia-Auditore

24.) Did you understand those references or did you have to look them up? (I'm fully away I'm ancient, but are you?)

I still do not understand HAHAHAHA!

25.) One last question; why are you like that?

Dag dag?

Now tag tag!!!

Some of the people I had in mind are already tagged. So...

If you do not agree with this tag you can ignore it completely, it is totally understandable! 😁

@fesim

Good vibes only! ~

[vlolets]

Thanks for the aesthetic tag @barenhaft 💜

soft: 12/20

baby pink | iridescent | glitter is always a good option | no bra | minimalistic tattoos | cherry patterns | sweet-scented perfumes | wearing generous amounts of blush | doodling hearts | getting excited to pet an animal | fun nails | rewatching old barbie movies | hair sticking to glossed lips | heart-shaped sunglasses | taking pictures of the sunset or sunrise | stuffed animals | protecting nature | stickers everywhere | teen movies | the light rain that falls from a clear sky at the beginning of the night

dark academia: 10/20

neutral tones | masculine outfits | studying languages | worn down copy of books | grey skies | turtleneck sweaters | loose-fitting pants | hair tied with a silk ribbon | trying to remember a cool difficult word you read somewhere to use in a convo | thick belts | minimal makeup | windows fogged by rain | vintage jewelry | blouses with cuffed sleeves | reading a murder mystery and trying to solve it | oxford style shoes | sweater vests | subtitled old movies in a language you don’t speak | leaves crackling as you walk | annotating books to express your emotions about the story

edgy: 9/20

closet full of dark clothes | fishnet tights | makeup sweating off | neon signs | searching for unknown songs | chokers | band tees | doodling on old converses | finding smoking aesthetically pleasing | weird humour | accidentally very dramatic | dim lights | layered outfits | chain belts | chipped nail polish | messy hair | low-quality pics | piercings | combat boots | scribbling on desks

70s: 11/20

colourful wardrobe | doodling flowers | wearing short shorts | using a bikini top or bra as a normal top | listening to ABBA | flowers in your hair | dyeing everything | jamming to songs alone in your room | drunkenly telling your friends you love them | patterned bandanas | mid-heeled shoes | messy braids | flared sleeves | walking barefoot on grass or sand | bold sunglasses | the good kind of tired you get after doing something you enjoy for hours | feeding stray animals | fun patterned socks | room decorated with succulents and other plants | likes to go roller skating or skateboarding

preppy casual: 14/20

collared clothes | drinking juice out of a champagne glass | getting excited to see the met gala looks | thick headbands | small pastel cardigans | making your friends take your ootd pics | plaid mini skirts | tweed two pieces | watching reality tv to pass time | frilly tops | watching old hollywood movies | academically driven | long manicured nails | new year’s eve fireworks | colourful tights | layered golden jewelry | yearns for luxury brand items | decorating your room with fairy lights | cursive and neat handwriting | lace details

Soft preppy? Lana and Blair Waldorf in a blender?

Tagging @lesbin @la-paritalienne @thecrownofflames @pushkinalexander and anyone else ✨

[cynicalities]

Aesthetic Tag Game

tagged by @morathicain , thank you! ❤

rules: highlight and count your score for each section

➼ 𝐒𝐎𝐅𝐓 : 9/20

baby pink | iridescent | glitter is always a good option | no bra | minimalistic tattoos | cherry patterns | sweet scented perfumes | wearing generous amounts of blush | doodling hearts | getting excited to pet an animal | fun nails | re-watching old barbie movies | hair sticking to glossed lips | heart shaped sunglasses | taking pictures of the sunset or sunrise | stuffed animals | protecting nature | stickers everywhere | teen movies | the light rain that falls from a clear sky at the beginning of the night |

➼ 𝐃𝐀𝐑𝐊 𝐀𝐂𝐀𝐃𝐄𝐌𝐈𝐀 : 11/20

neutral tones | masculine outfits | studying languages | worn down copy of books | grey skies | turtleneck sweaters | loose fitting pants | hair tied with a silk ribbon | trying to remember a cool difficult word you read somewhere to use in a convo | thick belts | minimal makeup | windows fogged by rain | vintage jewelry | blouses with cuffed sleeves | reading a murder mystery and trying to solve it | oxford style shoes | sweater vests | subtitled old movies in a language you don’t speak | leaves crackling as you walk | annotating books to express your emotions about the story |

➼ 𝐄𝐃𝐆𝐘 : 6/20

closet full of dark clothes | fishnet tights | makeup sweating off | neon signs | searching for unknown songs | chokers | band tees | doodling on old converses | finding smoking aesthetically pleasing but not doing it | weird humor | accidentally very dramatic | dim lights | layered outfits | chain belts | chipped nail polish | messy hair | low quality pics | piercings | combat boots | scribbling on desks |

➼ 𝟕𝟎’𝐒 : 5/20

colorful wardrobe | doodling flowers | wearing short shorts | using a bikini top or bra as a normal top | listening to ABBA | flowers in your hair | DIYing everything | jamming to songs alone in your room | drunkenly telling your friends you love them | patterned bandanas | mid heeled shoes | messy braids | flared sleeves | walking barefoot on grass or sand | bold sunglasses | the good kind of tired you get after doing something you enjoy for hours | feeding stray animals | fun patterned socks | room decorated with succulents and other plants | likes to go roller skating or skateboarding |

➼ 𝐏𝐑𝐄𝐏𝐏𝐘 𝐂𝐀𝐒𝐔𝐀𝐋 : 3/20

collared clothes | drinking juice out of a champagne glass | getting excited to see the met gala looks | thick headbands | small pastel cardigans | making your friends take your ootd pics | plaid mini skirts | tweed two pieces | watching reality tv to pass time | frilly tops | watching old hollywood movies | academically driven | long manicured nails | new year’s eve fireworks | colourful tights | layered golden jewelry | yearns for luxury brand items | decorating your room with fairylights | cursive and neat handwriting | lace details |

That was fun! ✨

I‘m tagging @gulaabjamoon @myriad-of-colors @spiderrpcrker @scatter-brain-at-work and if anyone else wants to do this, feel free to say I tagged you! <3

[verytendou]

✨AESTHETIC TAG✨

Tagged by @brokuro thanks maddy!!

>> 𝐒𝐎𝐅𝐓 5/20

baby pink | iridescent | glitter is always a good option | no bra | minimalistic tattoos | cherry patterns | sweet scented perfumes | wearing generous amounts of blush | doodling hearts | getting excited to pet an animal | fun nails | rewatching old barbie movies | hair sticking to glossed lips | heart shaped sunglasses | taking pictures of the sunset or sunrise | stuffed animals | protecting nature | stickers everywhere | teen movies | the light rain that falls from a clear sky at the beginning of the night |

>> 𝐃𝐀𝐑𝐊 𝐀𝐂𝐀𝐃𝐄𝐌𝐈𝐀 6/20

neutral tones | masculine outfits | studying languages | worn down copy of books | grey skies | turtleneck sweaters | loose fitting pants | hair tied with a silk ribbon | trying to remember a cool difficult word you read somewhere to use in a convo | thick belts | minimal makeup | windows fogged by rain | vintage jewelry | blouses with cuffed sleeves | reading a murder mystery and trying to solve it | oxford style shoes | sweater vests | subtitled old movies in a language you don’t speak | leaves crackling as you walk | annotating books to express your emotions about the story |

>> 𝐄𝐃𝐆𝐘 11/20

closet full of dark clothes | fishnet tights | makeup sweating off | neon signs | searching for unknown songs | chokers | band tees | doodling on old converses | finding smoking aesthetically pleasing but not doing it | weird humor | accidentally very dramatic | dim lights | layered outfits | chain belts | chipped nail polish | messy hair | low quality pics | piercings | combat boots | scribbling on desks |

>> 𝟕𝟎’𝐒 7/20

colorful wardrobe | doodling flowers | wearing short shorts | using a bikini top or bra as a normal top | listening to ABBA | flowers in your hair | DIYing everything | jamming to songs alone in your room | drunkenly telling your friends you love them | patterned bandanas | mid heeled shoes | messy braids | flared sleeves | walking barefoot on grass or sand | bold sunglasses | the good kind of tired you get after doing something you enjoy for hours | feeding stray animals | fun patterned socks | room decorated with succulents and other plants | likes to go roller skating or skateboarding |

>> 𝐏𝐑𝐄𝐏𝐏𝐘 𝐂𝐀𝐒𝐔𝐀𝐋 2/20

collared clothes | drinking juice out of a champagne glass | getting excited to see the met gala looks | thick headbands | small pastel cardigans | making your friends take your ootd pics | plaid mini skirts | tweed two pieces | watching reality tv to pass time | frilly tops | watching old hollywood movies | academically driven | long manicured nails | new year’s eve fireworks | colourful tights | layered golden jewelry | yearns for luxury brand items | decorating your room with fairylights | cursive and neat handwriting | lace details |

this was really fun!! I guess im 'edgy' but uh! i dont think anyones surprised haha [quietly shoves band tees into a drawer]. Not tagigng anyone bc i think i have tagged quite a few people (some more than once!) and yall probably want a break haha. but if anyone else wants to do it i'd love to see other ppls results :O

[irn-bru]

✨ aesthetic tag ✨

i was tagged by @anakinskyiwalker  (thank you! <3) to bold my faves/what applies to me:

>> SOFT 9/20

baby pink | iridescent | glitter is always a good option | no bra | minimalistic tattoos | cherry patterns | sweet scented perfumes | wearing generous amounts of blush | doodling hearts | getting excited to pet an animal | fun nails | rewatching old barbie movies | hair sticking to glossed lips | heart shaped sunglasses | taking pictures of the sunset or sunrise | stuffed animals | protecting nature | stickers everywhere | teen movies | the light rain that falls from a clear sky at the beginning of the night |

>> DARK ACADEMIA 6/20

neutral tones | masculine outfits | studying languages | worn down copy of books | grey skies | turtleneck sweaters | loose fitting pants | hair tied with a silk ribbon | trying to remember a cool difficult word you read somewhere to use in a convo | thick belts | minimal makeup | windows fogged by rain | vintage jewelry | blouses with cuffed sleeves | reading a murder mystery and trying to solve it | oxford style shoes | sweater vests | subtitled old movies in a language you don’t speak | leaves crackling as you walk | annotating books to express your emotions about the story |

>> EDGY 6/20

closet full of dark clothes | fishnet tights | makeup sweating off | neon signs | searching for unknown songs | chokers | band tees | doodling on old converses | finding smoking aesthetically pleasing but not doing it | weird humor | accidentally very dramatic | dim lights | layered outfits | chain belts | chipped nail polish | messy hair | low quality pics | piercings | combat boots | scribbling on desks |

>> ‘70s 9/20

colorful wardrobe | doodling flowers | wearing short shorts | using a bikini top or bra as a normal top | listening to ABBA | flowers in your hair | DIYing everything | jamming to songs alone in your room | drunkenly telling your friends you love them | patterned bandanas | mid heeled shoes | messy braids | flared sleeves | walking barefoot on grass or sand | bold sunglasses | the good kind of tired you get after doing something you enjoy for hours | feeding stray animals | fun patterned socks | room decorated with succulents and other plants | likes to go roller skating or skateboarding |

>> PREPPY CASUAL 2/20

collared clothes | drinking juice out of a champagne glass | getting excited to see the met gala looks | thick headbands | small pastel cardigans | making your friends take your ootd pics | plaid mini skirts | tweed two pieces | watching reality tv to pass time | frilly tops | watching old hollywood movies | academically driven | long manicured nails | new year’s eve fireworks | colourful tights | layered golden jewelry | yearns for luxury brand items | decorating your room with fairylights | cursive and neat handwriting | lace details |

tagging: @echos-gal @bi-scottsummers @skywalkerahsoka and anyone else who wants to do this!! 

[badliar-withasaviourcomplex]

ADAesthetics: Having an Aesthetic with ADHD

Cottage core, grudge, soft girl, and dark academia are only a few of the thousands of niche aesthetics one can partake in with only a little dedication, and a lot of disposable income. Modern fast fashion makes embodying an aesthetic is as easy as scrolling through Tik Tok for twelve hours straight. Not to sound overly cynical but I am fucking tired of aesthetics and yet... All I want is to find my aesthetic. One that makes me feel comfortable in my body, one that makes me feel like I can take on the world. 

Does anyone else feel like the moment you find an aesthetic and think this, this is the one for me, you learn about a different one that peaks your interest even more and immediately abandon the former. Recently I learned about the aesthetic ✨Croquette✨ and I was infatuated. I mean, not only does it have interesting origins, it has a classy light and feminine colour pallet which I love. So, I learn about this new aesthetic and immediately I begin to imagine outfits in my mind, fantasizing about looks with tops and dresses that I do not even own. And here comes in my main issue. It is impossible for my closet to keep up with my mind as it quickly shuffles through whatever aesthetics I find desirable at the moment. People with ADHD are dopamine deficient so we are always chasing  anything that provides us with even a crumb of dopamine. For me, aesthetics fulfil this. The act of finding a new aesthetic and planning out my life within it provides me with the dopamine my brain so desperately craves. 

So it’s all good then. Aesthetics make me happy so there is no problem, right? No. After becoming obsessed with an aesthetic and planning the outfits comes the time when I realize that I do not have the resources to live within that aesthetic. I almost experience a depressive episode from this. I cannot properly verbalize how badly I want to have an interesting wardrobe but for whatever reason I cannot. And it is not without lack of trying! When I find a new aesthetic I want to embody I go shopping as soon as possible, desperately searching for pieces that will help me achieve the aesthetic. But, for both financial reasons and ethical reasons, I choose to shop primarily at consignment or thrift shops and I rarely online shop. This makes it more difficult to find the specific items I want, leading to the aforementioned depressive episode.

The concept of “the tyranny of choice” basically states that with modern capitalism has provided consumers with two many options, adding stress rather than alleviating it. There are countless aesthetics available and, with internet communities, new ones are developing constantly. The options are, quite frankly, overwhelming. As a girly with ADHD, I feel these effects tenfold. Now, I am not a specialist so do not take this as fact but, I feel as though my ADHD makes decision making more difficult than it is for a neurotypical people. As such, when confronted with picking an aesthetic, which is something that involves overwhelming choice, I shut down. I begin to think what if I make the wrong decision. In her iconic novel The Bell Jar, Sylva Plath, or rather her character Ester Greenwood, discusses how she feels each decision or path is like a fig at the end of a branch that she must reach out and pick. But as she struggles to decide which fig to choose, or rather which path to take, the figs shrivel and die because she waited too long. This is how I feel with picking an aesthetic. Though aesthetics do not have a time limit, there seems to be a sort-of artificial time crunch associated with choosing. Indeed, on social media you see perfectly polished people sporting interesting and cohesive outfits that perfectly match their home decor, music, etc. These people seem so successful. These people seem so happy. I want that. And though, perhaps deep down, I am cognizant of the fact that this is all an act, I still feel inferior. I still want what these people have. I want it.

Though incredibly superficial, having a set aesthetic is something I have strived for since I watched my first lifestyle YouTuber at age twelve. I have tirelessly waffled between emo, sad girl, and cottage core countless times and I always downward spiral with each failed half-assed attempt. This trivial fixation on finding, and sticking to, an aesthetic is one I do not see ending soon. I fear failing once again but crave the dopamine much more. ADHD has many impacts on my life, ones that are definitely more significant than this, but still I sit here, writing about how I cannot find my aesthetic.