#In which case I'd sincerely like to apologize

[tikuri]

Revelation of the day

apparently volition aka willpower is something you can train and get better at? Like, if you push through and make yourself do things, not only will you get better at making yourself do that task, but you will get better at making yourself do things in general?

Was anybody gonna tell me about this or was I just supposed to find out about that by 1 am googleing myself?

[orionhelluvaranting]

Like creator, like character

Isn't that interesting how every bloody time someone tries to call Stolass' out this frigging owl finds a way to justify himself or shift the blame?

"I would feel bad if I hurt you but we both know I didn't do that!"

"Cheating implies there was a betrayal..."

"I don't look down on you!"

"I didn't leave you, I would never, that wasn't my choice!"

And do you know who does the exact same thing?

Vivziepop by herself! 🌟

"You disapprove me for sexualizing the rapist and preferring to sell merch with him rather than with his victim? C'mon, guys, Val isn't real! He's Karen from 'Mean Girls'! Fiction is an escape!.. You're just pissy your faves didn't get merch!"

"I liked the post calling my haters 'subhumans'? Well, people are just 'exhausted of being attacked for liking a show'. My fans harass critics? It sucks, but my fans are 'scared to talk about liking the show due to the harassment'. So you're no any better!"

"You've found a plothole XYZ, inconsistency in the story, lame jokes or any other flaws of my shows? No, my writing is smart and logical, bc I said so! Learn to read between the lines!"

"You think I have favoritism toward certain characters? No way! Stolass and Blitz are BOTH in the wrong, I'm gonna show this! Millie isn't ignored by the narrative, actually I'm so excited for you to know about her more! Loona doesn't speak a half of the season because... it was easier on the budget. HB has steered more towards a male-led stories. It's intended this way. You're just misunderstand my genius thought process."

"That's not my problem", "I care about SA victims," "Grow up!" etc.

And I'm not even talking about the justifying/problematic tweets she simply liked ����

This woman always has an excuse. For everything. Just like Stolass does. Honestly I'd rather not speculate about Stolass being Viv's self-insert (as other critics said long before) but that kind of behavior only confirms such statements. It's like they both live by this quote:

Say whatever you want but for me this is the main proof that Stolass will NEVER take responsibility for his own actions. Because it's seems like Vivienne has no clue how to do this either. She doesn't think she could ever be wrong. So she uses the same mentality for Stolass since he's her beloved pet.

And which one of Viv's excuses is your personal favorite? Mine is "We didn't ask anyone to redesign these characters, it's a choice". Sounds like "They should've seen that coming! It's their own fault they're harassed! What did they even expect?" for me. Just fucking brilliant! 😤💢

PS/ I haven't been monitoring Vivziepop closely enough all the time and maybe I don't see the whole picture, so please correct me if I'm wrong here but... I can't remember a single time this woman admitted her wrongness or apologized sincerely. Ever. I mean, if there's at least one case of Viv making amends or smth it would be nice, even if it prolly won't fix everything.

[killiaia]

Daddy and Mommy

Rosé x Male reader. 1.9K words

TW : A lot of Daddy and Mommy kinks. A lot of Breeding. Sorry not sorry.

--------------------------

"Why are you looking at me like that? " Rosé asks.

"Because I want to fuck you right now. "

Rosé blushes immediately. You see Rosé clench her thighs.

'Seriously, I could get down on my knees and eat your pussy."

Rosé lets out a moan, which makes you smile. 

You're at her parents' house on vacation. Everything's just perfect. It's a change for you, this being your first vacation in years. With the army and missions abroad, you never had time to take a vacation.

But here you are in Australia with Rosé. Her family is great, but you didn't expect her whole family to be there, which leaves you with very little time together. And you don't know what's going on with you right now, but you really want to fuck Rosé. 

"Soon. " Whispers Rosé. "Tonight, I've reserved a restaurant and a hotel room just for the two of us." 

"That's my good girl. "

Rosé looks around and whispers.

' I'm daddy's good girl. "

----

You follow Rosé into the restaurant and sure enough, it's a fancy restaurant. The kind of restaurant you know you could never afford. Rosé pulls you by the hand and you let yourself be guided. 

Rosé has put on a beautiful black dress that shows off her long legs. You put on a shirt and jeans that Rosé bought for you. 

You sit down at a secluded table towards the back of the restaurant. The waiter arrives, hands you your menus and leaves.

"I think even if I saved my whole life, I'd never be able to afford this restaurant. "You say.

"That's why I'm here. "

"In that case, you're my Sugar Mommy."

You look at the menu again, but you haven't missed Rosé's reaction to her nickname.

"What?" you say, eyes glued to the menu. "Do you like it when I call you Mommy?"

Rosé blushes and shifts in her seat.

"I think it's a good nickname for you. You pay me a lot of things Mommy."

"Baby... "

"What? That's right." You answer. "So tonight, Daddy's going to fuck Mommy."

"Oh god..."

"Daddy's gonna fill Mommy's pretty little pussy." you croon. 

"Baby.." whines Rosé. "Will you take care of me?"

"Of course. Daddy will start by fingering your pussy and then Daddy will eat your pussy."

"I'm so wet Daddy.. "

"I bet you are. If it were just me, I'd bend you over this table and fuck you like you deserve. "

Rosé's eyes darken and she closes the menu. 

"Let's get on with it. "

You don't argue and just follow Rosé. She apologizes to the waiter and you leave the restaurant.

"Mommy is so wet. " says Rosé as you get behind the wheel of the car. 

"Show me. " you say. 

Rosé flashes you a smile and spreads her legs, lifting up her dress. Her panties are soaked. Rosé runs a hand over them.

"So wet for my Daddy. "

"You're going to finger yourself the whole way to the hotel but don't make yourself come. "You order Rosé.

You start the car and out of the corner of your eye, you see Rosé take off her panties. The young woman starts by lowering her hand to her clit and begins to touch herself. 

"That's good, keep it up. " 

Encouraged by your words, Rosé begins to make circular movements on her clit. 

"Show me your breasts. "

Rosé listens and pulls down the top of her dress. You don't waste a minute and with one of your hands, you grab one of her breasts.

"Touch yourself. "

Rosé moans and inserts a finger into her pussy. You continue to knead her breast and pinch her nipples.

"Don't make yourself come. " You remind Rosé.

"Yeah.." pants Rosé 

"Good girl. " 

At the stoplight, you grab Rosé and kiss her. The young woman grabs your face and deepens the kiss. You smell her pussy on Rosé's finger. You grab her hand and lick her finger. Rosé's gaze is filled with desire. 

"Continue. " you say to Rosé.

The young woman listens and starts touching her clit again. Legs apart, breasts out, the view is just magnificent. Sincerely, it's very hard for you. If it were up to you, you'd park in an alley and fuck Rosé in the back seat.

"Daddy's gonna cum inside me?" Say Rosé 

"Yup, Daddy's gonna make you a Mommy."

"Fuuuck," says Rosé, fingering herself.

"We'll be there soon, get dressed Rosie. " 

"Yes Daddy. " 

Rosé gets dressed and you park the car in the hotel parking lot. Before getting out, you kiss Rosé. 

Rosé clings to your arm and you enter the hotel. Rosé asks for the room and you're given the key. You follow the Australian and get into the elevator. 

Rosé jumps on you and you slam her against the wall. You grab her face and deepen the kiss, your tongue forcing its way into her mouth. You run your hand down her dress and play with her clit.

"Oh god", says Rosé. 

You shut her up with a kiss and slip your hand into her panties. Without waiting, you stick a finger inside her.

"You're so tight and wet Rosie. "

"Only for you. "

You remove your finger from her pussy and lick your finger in front of Rosé, who moans. You help her get dressed and you get out of the elevator. 

Rosé gets out first and you can't help but tap her ass. Rosé turns and smiles at you. The young woman looks around and pulls up her dress, giving you a magnificent view of her ass and panties. 

"Open the door quickly, I'm going to fuck you like you deserve. "

Rosé opens the door and you follow immediately. No sooner has the door closed than Rosé is already naked.

"I need your cock. "

"Go lie down, I'll start by eating your pussy."

Rosé lets out a little cry of excitement and you watch the singer lie on her back and spread her legs. Her gaze anchored in yours, Rose brings her hand down and spreads the folds of her pussy.

"You have a beautiful pussy.

"I take care of it for you. Now is Daddy going to eat my pussy?"

"Daddy's going to eat your pussy," you confirm. "And then Daddy's gonna give you a big load so you can be a mommy."

You kneel on the edge of the bed and start kissing Rosé's beautiful legs. You take your time leaving kisses on every bit of skin on her leg. 

"Daddy, eat me. " Rosé is impatient.

"Be patient, baby. " You reply. 

You continue your oral assault on her legs. You slowly move up to her crotch and place a kiss on the tip of her crotch. Rosé shivers at the contact between your mouth and her pussy. 

Gently, you lick her clitoris, making Rosé jump with pleasure. You continue with a big lick from the bottom of her pussy to her clit. 

"It's so good." Shivers Rosé.

Encouraged by her words, you repeat the same gesture. You grab Rosé's legs and lift her pelvis. The position is embarrassing for her, she's so vulnerable like this but you don't give her time to respond, you start your assault on her pussy again.

"Oh god yes." 

You eat her pussy like it's your last feast. You spread the folds of her pussy with your hands and stick your tongue in her hole. 

Rosé is a mess. The young woman plays with her breasts.

You remove your tongue from her hole and replace it with your finger. You move back and forth and Rosé accentuates the movement with strokes of her pelvis.

"You're going to cum on my fingers like the little slut you are. "

"Oh yes. I'm your slut. "

"Cum slut! "

To accentuate your words, you plunge your mouth onto her clit. Rosé speeds up the movements of her pelvis and everything becomes the sound of your mouth against her pussy. Rosé lets out a high-pitched cry and you feel her juices flow into your mouth. Rosé's legs start to tremble and you grab her to lay her gently against the bed.

"Are you okay?" you ask Rose. 

Rosé lets out a nervous laugh, her legs still trembling, and you place a kiss on one of her legs.

"Yeah.." says Rosé softly. "First time I've come like this. "

You gently move up her body until you place a kiss on her mouth. Rosé wraps her arms around your neck and deepens the kiss.

"I love you. " Rosé suddenly says.

"I love you too, Rosie. More than anything. " You answer sincerely. 

"I want to spend the rest of my life with you. " says Rosé between kisses.

You're caught up in a surge of excitement and love for Rosé. Instinctively, you penetrate the young woman, who lets out a cry of pleasure. 

It's almost bestial. Your thrusts are powerful, shaking the bed. You continue to kiss her and Rosé pulls you towards her. All your weight is on her, but the young woman doesn't care. She's so taken with pleasure. 

The young woman lifts her legs, giving you a new angle of penetration. You grab her young ones, bringing them towards her. You stop kissing her to dot her neck with kisses. You suck her earball, increasing the pleasure. Rosé scratches your back. 

"Fuck me! Cum inside me! Make me a mommy."

"You're going to take my load. You're going to be so full. "

"Fill me up. Breed me. " Said Rosé.

"Get on all fours. I want to fuck you from behind. " You command her.

Rosé listens and the young woman gets down on all fours. You can't get enough of the view.

With her hands, she spreads her buttocks, giving you a view of her holes. With your hand, you caress her pussy and Rosé shivers at the contact. 

"What a beautiful pussy you have. " 

"Just for my Daddy. "

"That's right, that pretty and pretty ass is all mine. "

With your finger, you stroke her asshole as you position your cock in front of her pussy hole.

You slide your cock against her pussy.

"So wet. Just for me. "

"Put it in. " Rosé begs you.

"Ask nicely. "

" Put your dick in me Daddy. Smash my pussy."

You start by gently inserting the tip of your cock but Rosé is impatient. With a single thrust, her pussy engulfs your cock, taking you by surprise. You let out a moan of pleasure, Rosé's pussy is so tight.

"What a bad girl. " you say.

Rosé doesn't answer you. The young woman fucks herself on your cock.

"Bad girls deserve punishment. "

You raise your hand and slap her ass. Rosé lets out a cry of pleasure. You keep slapping her ass, increasing the Australian's pleasure.

"Keep fucking yourself. "

You grab her hair and pull it toward you, arching her back. With your other hand, you slap her ass.

"I'm going to cum. " Says Rosé.

You let go of her hair and put all your weight on her. You accentuate the thrusts and whisper in her ear.

"Come Mommy."

It's the final straw for Rose. You feel Rosé's vaginal walls contract around your cock. Rosé begins to tremble and lets out a hoarse cry of pleasure. 

You continue to thrust, determined to cum too. Rosé has understood your intention and continues to move her pelvis.

"Come inside me. Make me a mommy."

Almost like an animal, you give one last thrust and come in the Australian.

Completely exhausted, you drop onto Rosé. Breathing hard, you kiss Rosé's back. You pull out of her and see your cum coming out of her.

"I hope I'm pregnant. "

Rosé turns her head towards you and kisses you lovingly. 

"You'd make such a wonderful father. "

"If we have a child, he or she will be so lucky to have you as their mother. "

"I love you so much. " Rosé kisses you.

"More than anything. " You reply, looking at her lovingly.

[velvetvexations]

Right, so when one of your transandro comrades go on a mask-off tirade about how trans women are all objects, or rapists, or any number of awful shit it's "everyone makes mistakes uwu!"

But when a trans woman says something shitty suddenly your trite little "justice means forgiveness! everyone is human!" speech goes out the window and you loose your sycophants to run them off the site

I've said repeatedly that if even Rin Tezuka or Thicced Witch or any of the other really violently unhinged TRFs apologized for literally anything and recognized their behavior was terrible I'd defend them and their right to be forgiven and forgotten with my life, just the same as I would anyone else who sincerely apologized.

But none of them have ever done anything even close to that. Your whole premise is inherently flawed because you're acting like doing something bad is directly comparable to doing something bad and actually apologizing for it.

And, again, she told two different trans women to kill themselves. Four times. In like two hours. And she repeatedly doubled down on it. Then she called another trans woman a "sissy faggot." Acting like it's a targeted harassment campaign when mods react to that is insane. I'm not telling anyone to report her, mod action is literally just a thing that will happen because it's publicly telling people to kill themselves. This bizarre thing where you insist trans women should be free of all consequences because we're such poor little meow meows is deeply bizarre to me.

And she KNOWS that. Not only does she know that, because you could argue it's still not something worth being termed over, but you admit it's a really bad thing - so why is her doing a really bad thing, knowing it'll invite mod action, my fucking fault?

And I cannot fucking imagine any of you would feel this way if I had done anything like that. Yall are so unserious.

But for what it's worth even in this case yes, I would totally accept an extremely mild apology for advocating slur usage against another minority and telling multiple trans women to kill themselves, and if she remade, which she will, I would not do anything to ever connect her with the things she said previously or put her in the line of sight of anyone who might still have held a grudge.

Let me know when she, you know, apologizes, but I'm not holding out hope for it happening before the heat death of the universe. In the meantime I'm sure she will come back to a site she characterizes as being so horrifically transmisogynistic for the five millionth time, whining about how unfair it was.

[ask-stan-and-ford]

To Stanford,

I’ve been thinking about the pills you invented so you wouldn’t need to sit down and take the time to consume a meal. How do they work exactly, if you wouldn’t mind explaining? The process of eating is not only physical, but also in part psychological. The nutritional component is most self explanatory, I think, but staving off the feeling of hunger is what stumps me.

The sensation of feeling ‘full’ and ‘satisfied’ after a meal is not determined by the amount of needed nutrition one consumes. It’s a joined result of the visual perception of the food, the amount of energy needed to consume it (chewing, swallowing, ect.), the time consumption takes, the amount inside the stomach, and probably a few more factors I can’t readily recall.

By simply consuming (whatever quantity of) pills you would be sidestepping a lot of important steps that both the body and the mind need to feel satisfied.

I find it hard to believe one would choose to go around with the constant nag of hunger in their body, so have you found something around this?

I’m sure drinking good amounts of water would help, though certainly not to a fully satisfactory degree. Maybe you have found something to simulate the whole process, like looking at images of food and maybe chewing gum? Though that would make taking the pills less time efficient, which is the whole reason for their existence in the first place. Perhaps you’ve found some kind of artificial hunger suppressor?

In any case, I’m curious and would love to know what (if any) solution you have for the issue.

Sincerely,

🫘

PS: I do apologize again for the rather large amounts of text in these asks, I hope they’re not too much of a bother and will try to keep future questions more brief. I also want to say thank you for doing this! They’re extremely fun, the responses are always very in-character and I love seeing them pop up on my dashboard.

Maybe I can help with this one. Even if he wasn’t fully satisfied mentally, it had to make do. I’ve gone without plenty of meals, and went a while without consistent portions and eating times. So living with the “constant nagging of hunger” is actually pretty common. The human body works in crazy ways and at some point you can even trick yourself into feeling full. You body adapts to your situations and environments pretty well. Lots of people go hungry everyday and so they just live with that feeling. So long as his body was getting enough nutrients he was of course surviving. But I’m sure the actual concept of eating and reintroducing human foods back into his body has been a long and difficult process.

Wow Stanley I'm impressed that you didn't take that moment to poke fun at an odd thing I don't avoid "normal human things." I do thank you for starting me off though, and I'd have to say you hit the nail right on the head. Essentially, yes, I don't quite get rid of the feeling of hunger, but my body still gets what is needed. There's still always a baseline of satisfaction from getting nutrients, so I can keep the hungry feeling manageable. Over time I've learned to sort of train myself into remembering I've gotten all the supplements I need (since that was the whole point of the pills in the first place) and that I'm still going to function as intended. I should mention, saying this, I'm a horrible role model. Please eat your meals and don't take after me. I'm beginning to actually integrate actual food back into my diet now because I want to spend time with my family and I don't have to be concerned about multidimensional shenanigans anymore. Take care of yourself as I am learning to as well!

[palaxy27]

A very... sad headcanon was mentioned on Discord.

WARNING: Mention of depression and serious topics‼️‼️‼️

Boone has depression.

And that reminded me of this Boone fanfic (it's one of the few that focuses on Boone, and that's also considering that before there were more, but still few)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/5549291

While I don't agree with the idea, it would make sense.

I CLARIFY I DON'T KNOW ABOUT THESE TOPICS!!! TAKE THIS WITH CAUTION IN CASE I SAY SOMETHING WRONG!!

We've seen that Boone, despite being very cheerful and relaxed, has been very depressed many times. And it doesn't help that his friends (especially Penn) have often underestimated or doubted him. The example that comes to mind is in The Fast and the Floor Rugs, which, while understandable, is where Penn learns to trust his friend more... but he makes that mistake many times later. In The Bewildering Bout of the Astounding Automatons, it was seen more literally. The chapter begins with Penn telling him that he always messes things up. And when does Penn "activate"? He immediately starts saying things to him when he finds out that Boone set him up (I was honestly really frustrated with Penn here)

In fact, in a fanfiction.net fanfic by Pennashi, I believe, in one part, Boone mentions that he's still affected by what happened at The Princess Most Fair I sincerely liked that Aitor took this into account

And I'd also like to see a fanfic where Boone confronts him about this or where Penn reflects on this and apologizes

That and I just want to see more of him, the poor guy is always forgotten please😭😭😭😭🥺🥺🥺🥺

[frownyalfred]

Hello! A random and specific question has occurred to me, and I think you might have some thoughts, if you're ok with answering!

So, most of the time Judaism is passed down matrilineally. I know there are some exceptions, and some groups that believe Judaism can be passed down through either parent, but generally it's just through the mother. This is how dc accidentally made Bruce Jewish.

However, is it the birthing parent who makes a child Jewish? Or is it strictly the mother, regardless of if she gives birth to the child or not?

I know that sounds like I'm asking about trans Jewish people, but I'm actually curious how this would play out in a world where mpreg is normalized, like in an abo alternate universe. For instance, if Bruce is Jewish and gets pregnant as an omega, would his kids also be Jewish? I did look up perspectives on trans Jewish people having kids, and unsurprisingly views are divided but it seemed like people mostly consider the birthing parent being important, i.e. a trans Jewish man would have Jewish children regardless of the other parent. What are your thoughts on this, if you're open to sharing?

(This ask got longer than I meant, sorry I wrote you a whole essay lol. Also I really hope this doesn't come across as rude, and I sincerely apologize if it does. Tone is difficult on the internet!)

Oh, that's a very very interesting question. Another one I'd like to ask my rabbi if I ever work up the nerve.

I'm no scholar, so if someone else wants to correct me on this one, feel free. But here's my best guess:

The gist of matrilineal descent is that it emerged from a time when the only way you could guarantee that a child was Jewish was to witness the birth from a Jewish mother. Rape, missing fathers, etc all made it a grey area, and back then, it was the only way to be "sure" that a child was halachically Jewish.

The interesting thing is, this was a change from patrilineal descent, but people still argue about when that change happened. Depending on the denomination, matrilineal descent is very very important beyond just determining Judaism, or it's a vestigial practice that has stuck around because it's, well, tradition.

Now, origin and existence are two different things. While it might have emerged for certain reasons, modern standards have obviously changed. We can do DNA tests and other rituals. But a lot of major denominations will turn away patrilineal Jews or hold those with Jewish DNA at arm's length until their Jewishness has been determined. That's only changed recently, and even then very slowly.

So, now that that's out of the way -- how does this relate to omegaverse? I suppose carriers in a/b/o universes would be considered de facto mothers, because they give birth. From my (limited) understanding, the core of most strict matrilineal arguments are 1) we've always done it this way post reception of the Torah 2) it was the only way to ensure someone was Jewish and 3) there are inherent attributes to mothers/the feminine that Rabbis argue are metaphysical and important to consider.

But it depends on how you write omegas. Are they defined by their ability to birth? Are they dual sex or single sex? Do they have the ability to sire offspring in addition to carrying them? Do they serve a "motherly" role in addition to giving birth? All things to consider.

Me personally, I'm a big proponent of accepting all Jews as they are, as long as they're not proselytizing or cosplaying as Jewish from another religion. It's a closed practice but we're also dwindling in number, so turning away people because their father was Jewish and not their mother is bizarre to me. Especially if they were raised in the religion -- at that point it's a technicality, but many rabbis will still make you go through a conversion which is wild to me.

I would throw out there, for the sake of omegaverse -- if the carrier is Jewish, generally, in most cases, the pups are Jewish. That makes sense to me.

[daughterofevil158]

After Damon was shot, how does Jett react to realizing that Damon also got hurt during the accident, & how does he apologize? Does Damon forgive him immediately, or does it take time?

Prefacing with my personal interpretation of how their soulmark works (and a bunch of other stuff) (this ended up 3 paragraphs longer than I intended lol)

I've always been imagining the "shared pain" soulmark as having varied intensity among individual soulmate pairs. Basically, "If person A is in pain, person B feels 80-99% of that pain" because I'd think there would be some dampening due to person B not actually being injured (though I've been writing Jettmon portions as closer to the 99% threshold). However, the pain only subsides if person A does something about it. It's similar with things like illnesses and headaches (but technically worse for the illnesses since, because person B is only feeling the symptoms without actually being sick, they can still get the illness passed to them. Then person B is feeling A's illness on top of their own symptoms)

According to Jett's bio card, the accident was "just over a year ago," meaning he would've been about 19 (which, jesus christ man). And meaning Damon would've been 17 (jesus christ man). Neither of those feel like fun ages to go through that. Honestly feels like a tie when wondering who'd have it worse: Jett has to physically bear the scars of it along with dealing with the paparazzi, and Damon was a literal child who did not sign up for this. Plus in my OG post I mentioned it possibly happening during one of Damon's debates, so there's that too.

And while I mentioned here that there likely have been some bad injuries prior, the accident was definitely the worst. I feel like a year is maybe enough to, if not forgive, let any resentment go, but there's definitely a good amount in those first few months because being in pain sucks and being unable to do anything about it sounds like it sucks harder. But those prior injuries do leave the impression that clearly Damon's soulmate is either in a dangerous career or the clumsiest bastard who ever lived (and a bit more resentment fades when rationalizing that just being a klutz wouldn't be enough in this specific case, as well as remembering that they're also suffering from this).

Once Damon finds out it's Jett, there's the internal realization of "okay, yeah drag racing would explain all of that." And he's kinda just. Waiting for Jett to bring it up because Damon's already dealing with the Eva+Wolfgang situation, he does not want to add more on top of that unless he has to. And Jett's kinda just. Waiting for Damon to bring it up because surely if their soulmark was at a higher intensity he'd say something. Damon had never been seriously injured before so for all Jett knew the soulmark only projected some mild discomfort/pain, Once the Eva situation is mostly resolved it kinda slips from their minds.

At least until Damon gets shot and Jett realizes that, considering how bad that felt for him, his own pain from the accident must've been felt by Damon. And instead of being angry at him for ruining their lives, Damon had just been accepting his dumb requests for thumb wars and such. So in a nutshell, Jett's feeling Pretty Bad™

When he finally gets the chance to apologize once Damon awakens, his sincerity and genuine remorse help make up for him not being very good at wording things. And Damon's already had a year to process, and it already happened and can't be un-happened, and Jett clearly didn't know, so any lingering remnants of anger quietly wither away. There's definitely promises to be more careful once Jett's recovered enough to go back on the track.

(if you made it to the end, congrats! your reward is watching jett's ftes on repeat until you see the appeal of jettmon)

[hollygl125]

I enjoy your writing and am itching for more :P I still have plenty to read, but I'd like to know if you've got something in the works? 💛

Hi, @moviesaremylife!

Thank you so much for your very kind words—I’m so glad to know you enjoy my writing—and my sincere apologies for being so slow on getting back to you! I’m a bit behind on life everything. (I was also probably slightly delaying my answer, so I could give you a full response.)

I have a few drabbles stored away for whenever I feel like adding something to my AO3 account. (Okay, that’s probably not the most interesting part of the answer.)

I have a couple of other ideas, none begun, for self-indulgent one-shots/short fics. I’d also potentially like to go back and explore in more detail some significant encounters between the two characters.

I have a somewhat silly half-completed “fantasy” pwp that I will get back to working on at some point.

I just yesterday finally finished fleshing out (unintended and unfortunate pun, if you knew the details) the draft for my one-shot for this crossovers and fusions event. I would very much love to entertain guesses on what the other piece of media in my smashup will be. (I assume we’re taking it as a given that everything I write is GSR-focused and one of the pieces of media will be CSI. But this will be the first time I’ve written for anything other than CSI!) If anyone guesses correctly, I’ll post an excerpt. Anyway, that story will be posted next week.

I have a complete draft for this fairy tale AU bang. We just did the writer/artist matchups a week ago, so I am finally allowed to talk about this story now—I’m very excited about it! My story is a “beast,” which means, based on word count, it qualified for the big bang rather than the mini bang. (To be honest, it’s actually more like two and a half beasts.) That story will be posted in July.

I have an idea for this 5k AU event, and we’ll have to see whether I get anywhere with writing it. If I write it, that story will be posted in August.

I have a few other ideas for long fic AUs. I don’t want to get into too much detail in case I never end up writing any of them. But I like the idea of exploring the consequences of some small change (you know, the flap of a butterfly’s wings, the flip of a coin, etc.) that could affect when and how the characters first meet, and how that would affect them each individually as well as affect the development of their eventual relationship. I have a couple of ideas that follow that path. I also have an idea for a complete AU that I have generally plotted out but that would require more research than I can see myself wanting to do, so I’m not sure whether that will ever go anywhere. I find writing generally enjoyable and relaxing (when there’s no deadline involved!); I find posting fic to be a bit of an emotional roller coaster ride, though. So I am looking at these longer projects more as something I am doing primarily to amuse myself, and if I ever finish them I will share them, rather than as something I am doing primarily for the goal of completing and sharing them, if that makes any sense?

Anyway, thank you again so much for your interest in my writing, and my apologies again for the delay in getting back to you! 💛💛💛

[aeolian-mode]

Analysis of Mouthwashing (indie game)

Just played Mouthwashing and it's really affecting me. Thought I'd type my thoughts/analysis of it. (TW: if you don't know about the game, I talk about sexual assault as it is a major theme of this story. Also, spoilers!)

I was thinking for a while about the symbolism of televisions and screens in this game. I believe they are a metaphor for falsehoods. The vintage commercials are often untrue in today's modern economy or exaggerated. The screens seem to represent an unattainable ideal.

The screens in the ship display false day/night cycles. Anya finds comfort in the fake nighttime, but notices the dead pixel, which I think represents how she, herself, is overlooked in the "big picture" of both the Pony Express profits and Curly failing to notice and help her.

Swansea eventually destroys the screen of the sunset, revealing the grotesque reality beneath. He hates the falsehood and he strips the fantasy away. But what really struck me is the scene when Jimmy confronts Curly while watching himself in a TV screen during one of his final hallucinations. He tells Curly this: "What happened was an accident. We were trapped. I made a mistake."

When we watch TV we, more often than not, are watching actors engaged in a performance.

So, not even during his supposed moment of self-awareness is Jimmy sincerely apologizing and recognizing his own assholery. He's just watching himself, playing himself, on a screen.

In contrast, when Swansea gives us his monologue, the characters are silhouetted against a TV screen. There are no actors represented on this screen, just flashes of indistinct scenes and colors. Swansea is no actor, not anymore. He's real and sincere. He's above the performance now.

In Jimmy's case, not only is he apologizing insincerely to only one of his victims, he never acknowledges or apologizes to his primary victim. In fact, when we see her corpse, he doesn't acknowledge her at all. Worse, he actively blocks out the reality of what he's seeing later. Not once is Anya acknowledged in his television performance. I think he's a pretty terrible actor.

Additionally, Jimmy also never says directly what he did.

"What happened was an accident. We were trapped. I made a mistake."

What, exactly, is he referring to here?

The rape? Crashing the ship and pinning Curly on it? Tormenting Curly in his suffering? Slowly whittling down the rest of his crew until Anya breaks and kills herself, Daisuke is manipulated into entering a life-threatening vent, and Swansea snaps?

None of things were accidents or mistakes. They were all calculated decisions. "What happened" (passive) "was an accident" (absolving himself self of guilt). "I made a mistake" (sad sausage.)

Abusers rarely apologize. When they do, it's often performative, saying what the other person wants to hear. And they don't tend to directly acknowledge their own actions. They seem physically repulsed by the idea of saying "I hurt you. I made a decision to inflict this specific suffering on you." (In Jimmy's case: "I mixed the cocktail. I drugged you. I waited for you to pass out. I broke into your room. I raped you.") "This was evil. I was evil. I will do what is necessary to face the consequences, from both you, and society."

You will probably never hear an abuser say something like this, especially without an ulterior motive. To directly acknowledge their decisions, retread their steps, and verbalize how it hurt someone else? This is the antithesis of a disordered personality. A person who does this sincerely is probably a well-meaning and stable person, or a disordered person who is taking therapy seriously.

The fact that Jimmy is only able to bring himself to say "I made a mistake" as an actor on TV just really struck me the more I thought about it. I don't know how many other people also felt like this but I thought I'd share, since I've read a lot of analysis about Mouthwashing but haven't read about anyone talking about this. The symbolism of the game shows an impressive and unsettling understanding of what goes on in the minds of abusers. It reminds me so much of my own situation. It makes me feel seen. To know that the game's narrative grapples with this, and made a character like this with no redemption and no sympathetic "come to Jesus" moment, is cathartic to me.

Jimmy is an abuser. He never cares about the pain he causes others. He only cares about impression management, dodging consequences, and feeling like a good person. When all avenues to achieve this fail for him, there's only one way out. And he would rather crash the ship, manipulate everyone further into suffering and death, and shoot himself than face the music.

It's just so, so real.

[chaifootsteps]

there's a post on helluva boss' reddit that's like 'guess what's happening here!' [the shot where Stolas is singing onstage w/Verosika]

random reply roundup of responses, in order of how frustrating they are:

least frustrating -> it's a fakeout where it seems like Stolas is gonna roast Blitzo but instead he sings something sincere. This is the best of all possible worlds, if only Stolas would take some responsibility for what he did. Even this best case scenario is likely to be 'I'm so sad because he hurt me and all I wanted was to love him, poor little princely me :/' and Blitzo somehow falls for this BS

people pointing out roasting Blitzo will not help him/is still scapegoating him -> slightly better, though it still holds back from pointing out Stolas is the one in the wrong here and he doesn't get to complain when Blitzo is justifiably wary or angry at him

more frustrating -> Verosika feels bad for Stolas and wants him to realize how bad Blitzo is. Like yeah it's possible she'll project all the baggage from her relationship onto Stolas, but it doesn't mean that's a good thing to do. She's right that Blitzo treated her poorly, by his own admission with the credit cards thing he did, but her relationship with Blitzo is not the same as Stolas'. Blitzo is not the bad one in this scenario

-> Stolas sings about his heartbreak but doesn't name names. Um, he's singing it in front of a massive 'Blitzo sucks' poster with Blitzo's ex onstage. That excuse really doesn't fly, given how open a secret the 'affair' is it's obvious who he's talking about and Blitzo has every right to be hurt

-> Stolas' song is a 'wakeup call' to Blitzo. Er, wakeup to what? How it's Stolas' world now and he's just living in it, so he better get down on his knees and beg for forgiveness?

-> Blitzo should initiate the apology to show he's grown! I agree Blitzo should initiate the apology...to Verosika. Then he should tell her what happened between him and Stolas so a succubus who likely knows what it's like to have people try to force themselves on her (that No dress in her photo with Blitzo, anyone) can have Tex throw him off stage and get the crowd to egg his royal ass. If anyone needs a public humiliation here it's Stolas, not Blitzo

-> the song is a love ballad but it becomes an excuse for Blitzo & Stolas to roast Verosika who was doing a diss track. Only on the Stolas Show featuring Misogyny and Plotlines Ripped Directly from Fanfics, am I right?

most frustrating -> changing the lyrics to Poison so Stolas is the one singing it about Blitzo. No, I'm not kidding. We've well and truly crossed the DARVO event horizon here

side note, I'd love for these Stolas stans to articulate why they think Stolas has a fair reason to be hurt by Blitzo.

"He lead him on!" Uh, when? Blitzo was coerced into a deal to keep his job and kept up his end of the bargain.

"At Ozzie's!" He wasn't the one who called it a date, Stolas was. Blitzo's reaction at the end of the night make it very clear he thought Stolas wanted sex out of him & he didn't invite Stolas along as a date. He obviously thought he needed to appease Stolas by sleeping with him but he just wasn't emotionally up to it, so he called Stolas out for trying to have it both ways. If Stolas had any self awareness at all he would have learnt something from that.

"Blitzo lead him on by sleeping with him!" They had a one night stand after which Blitzo robbed Stolas, ghosted him and then was repulsed by/turned down his advances multiple times (and extended that attitude to his text responses, too). It's not Blitzo's fault Stolas was living in wilful self-delusion and making an imp responsible for fixing the life he trashed when he very much consented to cheating on his wife

I had to read this backwards so as to retain a little of my faith in humanity. Also, I'd just like to put it in writing now that I'm holding out a miniscule scrap of faith for the first option, because I never learn.

[ask-encore-ragatha]

So, you said you need advice. Well, I'm here to put my two cents in!

Firstly, for the Gangle situation: Make sure to not rush her on anything. What you said to her during the Spudsy's adventure really hurt her, even if it wasn't intentional, so you should definitely give her some space to let things blow over until she talks to you a little more. Make sure to practice general sincerity as much as you can, as well - one of the things she complained about following what you said was how she finds it difficult to pinpoint how genuine you're being, which could make apologizing a bit more difficult. But definitely give her an opportunity to think things through.

Secondly, for the whole Jax thing, I'd say again that you should take some time - in this instance, for yourself. Really contemplate these feelings and consider if they're worth progressing. Then, in the case that you find that you do want to further explore the concept of you two becoming better friends, try to work your way into Jax's social circle. Even if it means something as simple as asking him how he slept the previous night or attempting to connect with him over a hobby (...if such a thing is even possible). Also, get some advice from your fellow circus members! I'm sure someone like Pomni would be willing to help you out. Or you could ask your ever-so-loyal fans for assistance, you know we'd be happy to help too.

Basically, just take things slowly, and don't leap head-on into anything that you don't think will end well! You've got this! :D

(This might be the longest answer I've given so far! Thank you for giving me this fun scenario! I had fun monologuing my way to insanity. The big question though is do she got this? Idk, but all I'm gonna say is she's going to be commenting on a looooooot of Jax's posts......)

[iniziare]

ignoring aventurine's blatant gay coding is really something

Other things have had me a little salty this morning, so in case that influences my perception of how you intended this, my sincere apologies. Either way, forgive me for being serious for a moment, but I want to use this as a PSA to make a point going forward on this blog.

I have nothing against opposing views, and I have nothing against people disagreeing with me, but what I have something against on principle, are potentially snarky messages like this one that seem to have only one aim, which is to try and taint my character by making insinuations that are wholly unfounded (that you think me to be anti-LGBT?) and based on something that you genuinely cannot draw any such thing from. Now whether Aventurine is 'gay-coded' as you so put it, or a bisexual man (on which note: it's real saddening to see that in 2024, in-house fighting against bisexuality's mere existence still reigns supreme, good job, you're really making admirable strides) doesn't matter for what I'm going to touch on. Although out of respect for the character himself and the person who wrote him, I can't move on without noting that you may want to reread some character stories, some dialogues (particularly things said by the Harmony to him, for instance), to see whether that seals your faith in your claim, or diminishes it. Either way, I want to remind you: being bisexual doesn't reduce the significance of being drawn to the same sex.

Alright, continuing what I was saying: messages like these don't accomplish anything, outside of making you feel like you're on a pedestal; is it cold up there? I don't envy you. In all seriousness however, in all my years on any of my blogs, I have always aimed to be canon-strict with my portrayals, with which I set myself up for something that I deem imperative for myself in RP: to be criticized by the masses. I have always tried to engage with my follower base, I have always encouraged them to come to me if I'm wrong on something, I value people trying to poke holes in my logic. And if you succeed in proving that I overlooked something, I will happily admit it, and stand corrected. In that, I aim to say that I thoroughly enjoy debate and discussion (based in rationale, and not feelings), which I think are fundamental to our society even outside of Tumblr. If someone disagrees with me, my notes are open, if you want to question something that I think or have posted, my askbox (as you've learned and have made use of) is open. But all I ask is that you open a line of healthy debate with me, and not send something that is entirely baseless if you don't even substantiate your claim in your same message. But also, what I don't understand is that my post doesn't even directly diminish the popular Aventurine/Ratio ship in the fandom, it instead simply expresses frustration that not more people see the depth of the Aventurine/Topaz dynamic, and recognize it as a good ship as well, because there is a lot within the game that aims at a definite potential there. Granted, yes, that comes with having to acknowledge that Aventurine may just be a bisexual man who is also into women, but if that's something that doesn't sit quite right with you, then maybe the issue that you're pointing at me, should be returned to you, the one who initially pointed the accusatory finger here.

Again, if you want to have a conversation about this and tell me why you think that I'm wrong by substantiating your own claim, you're very welcome to, and I'd be happy to engage with you. But until then, this is all that I have for you. And before I might get a 'why do I need to substantiate my thing, Sae', it's nothing against you personally, and instead it's the simple 101 of debate. You disagree with a point that I make? Then it is up to you to tell me why you disagree, so that I can give you a fruitful counter that you can then do something with.

Regardless of the intention of your message, anon, I wish you a good day, and I hope that it's raining less over there, wherever you may be, than it is over here. I'm not motivated to go get my groceries!

[magicbeings]

hi!!

i recently found your fics and i absolutely LOVE them!!! i stumbled upon your catfish!au and was immediately obsessed with your storytelling and opened up your account to see you were the author of the pretty woman au i opened and that consequently lost in my 100s of open ao3 tabs. needless to say, i’ve quickly read almost all of your fics and can’t wait to see what you have next!!

if my understanding is correct, english is not your first language which a) SO impressive, you are giving such incredible works to the fandom FOR FREE and in a language other than your own, so grateful! and b) PLEASE know this is not a thing i’d normally go to the effort to comment on, because as said literally adore everything you put out and am not one to harp on tiny mistakes, esp if english isn’t your first language, but i noticed that throughout your fics, you have the occasional typo of “groin” as “groyne” (which is a word i’ve discovered today! just for a coastal feature that helps prevent erosion, the more you know!)

again, NOT a thing i’d normally feel any need to point out, however i have also recently read an anonymously-authored, r/s explicit series on ao3, and noticed in an update that was posted today also featured the use of “groyne” in place of where “groin” would normally be used

i’m not making any sort of insinuations, as any reason an author may want to post some fic, smutty or otherwise, that is not associated with their username is entirely valid!! but, in case it is a helpful tip, and in case there are any other slightly crazy detail-oriented people like myself who might make some speculative connection, changing said typo to groin in the anonymous fic might avoid future questions

i am SO SO sorry if all of this is incredibly presumptuous and i am an incredibly off-base stranger riddled with recency bias in your ask box, but i thought about if i were in this possible situation i would appreciate the notice. again, just such sincere apologies if said notice is unwanted or completely unneeded lol

again, i am enjoying your works very much and am looking forward to reading the tarot fic next! i hope you keep up all your creative endeavors and continue to do generously share it as long as it brings you joy 💗

Hi! First of all, thank you for the lovely message! I'm glad you're enjoying my stories 😌

Secondly (and I'm gonna answer this ask publically, in case anyone else perhaps wondered the same thing as you), no, I have no other works posted on AO3, under any different usernames, nor orphaned/anonymous. I mean, I have no reason too, all my most embarrassing kinks are already pretty clear from the works I already have under my username, so 😂

I hadn't realised the spelling of "groin" as "groyne" was wrong. Google Docs, which is where I write all my works, says that "groyne" is the British spelling for "groin", and will flag "groin" as wrong when set to spell check for British English. As I try my hardest to use British English on my Marauders fics (even if that's hard for me, because I originally learned American English), I was under the impression it was correct 😂 but I've recently started spell checking on MS Word, and it does flag "groyne" as wrong, and it did leave me very confused.

Then, I googled it, and there are some references saying the spelling "groyne" is correct for British English... So idk, maybe some native speaker can clarify that for me? I'm very curious now.

@marigold-hills @tealeavesandtrash @leavesthatarebrown @quiethauntings any of you Brits care to help me with this one? Hahah

But, to answer your question: no, that work you're referring to is not mine. Perhaps it's just written by another clueless non-native speaker who's trusting Google Docs to spell check for them? I'd bet that's what happened (:

And don't worry, I don't think your message is presumptuous and I really appreciate its intention, I'm sure if it was the case, it'd have been very helpful to have a heads up!

[mrsfrederickchilton]

FREDERICK. Chapter 52

The next day, Dr. Chilton, a naive soul, sincerely apologized for falling asleep in the middle of your movie. It is unlikely that he would have done that knowing that he had signed part of his own death warrant. And hardly he would be so eager to see you tomorrow, Wednesday, knowing that he would sign the other. You were determined. This had to be over. Although, of course, you weren’t sure that everything would turn out the way you wanted. But even that couldn’t spoil your mood.

I was thinking about you all day yesterday, you wrote to Dr. Chilton on Wednesday morning.

I’ve never had so many indecent thoughts in my life.

Dr. Chilton typed something for a long time, then apparently erased it, in the end not finding a suitable answer. You wished you could see his face.

You put on a skirt and a rather translucent button-down blouse. Naturally, you met orderly Higgins in the corridor, who looked at you with such a look that you almost burned with shame. For yourself — who you have become. For your clothes — the ones you usually don't wear. For the fact that he knows why you dress like that. He invited you to the dining room and you, in order to delay the moment of meeting with Dr. Chilton, agreed. You took a glass of juice and calmly discussed the weather (it was getting colder), the approaching Christmas (they would soon put up a Christmas tree in the hospital) and the shortened shift of the orderly, who needed to resolve some personal matters. That is why you did not play chess with him today or exchange short messages with your love. You found out about this yesterday, but did not change your plan. Maybe it is even better this way: neither chess nor the message from your love (which orderly Higgins had obviously already received, but decided to hold off, as is proper, until the next game) will distract you.

“Good luck,” orderly Higgins grinned as he said goodbye, and you couldn’t find the strength to thank him.

She's a pretty, you were right. Why did those words stick in your mind? Because Dr. Chilton discussed his patient's appearance with Dr. Irving (it's better not to even know in what words)? Or because Dr. Irving evaluated her — and what could he do in that case?

I didn't think I'd meet such a beauty today. What an asshole. Did Dr. Chilton discuss your appearance with him? You looked through a bunch of other emails yesterday, but didn't find a single mention of you. Actually, that wasn't exactly to your advantage, but on the other hand, for some reason you were glad that Dr. Chilton didn't drag your name (or your successes, virtues, or deviations) around. You also looked through the cloud storage of photos, almost empty. Alas, no incriminating images.

For now.

You poured the rest of the juice into the sink, rinsed the glass and put it back. You took the gum out of your bag, took your down jacket off the back of the chair and headed to the restroom to touch up your makeup. Yes, today you not only dressed up, but also put on makeup. No sweatshirts or buns. You combed your hair, not used to being so loose, and looked at yourself critically in the mirror. You looked like some kind of naughty teacher, although there was nothing particularly vulgar about your image. Apparently, your subconscious itself threw up suitable associations. You still decided not to renew your lipstick, half-erased by the juice. Having thrown away the gum and gotten rid of a piece of toilet paper that had clung to the small heel of your ankle boot, you dejectedly walked out into the hallway. But the closer you got to Dr. Chilton's office, the straighter your back became. This just had to be done. At least somehow. If it doesn't work out the first time, it will be a rehearsal.

You've seen such rehearsals in a coffin, of course.

“How are you?” Dr. Chilton asked, hanging your down jacket on the hanger and not taking his eyes off you.

You smelled of mint and cherries, and you were probably cold in that thin blouse.

“Wonderful,” you replied. “And you?”

Dr. Chilton perked up, seeming to hear genuine interest in your question for the first time.

“Mee too,” he smiled. Your messages had simultaneously excited and alarmed him, but he decided not to discuss them for now. The words you wrote were quite piquant, but what were you really thinking while typing them? Were your eyes cold, as they often were when you two were close?

Even if they were, he had never received such messages.

You sat down — Dr. Chilton had not been sitting at his desk for a long time, but sat in the “equal” chair opposite you — and he fished a beautiful jar out of a paper bag on the floor and set it on the table. You looked closely: blackberry tea with lemon zest. The same one you had recently drunk in the restaurant.

“I thought you liked it.”

You looked at the tea, but not at the psychiatrist. Hadn't you been taking too long? But you couldn't risk it until you had access to the phone. The plan was two-part, one wouldn't be enough. But that damn tea... You wished Dr. Chilton was less attentive. That in his eyes you were closer to that failed intern than to... whoever he thought you were today.

“Thank you,” you replied. “Are they going to put up a Christmas tree at the hospital soon?” You needed to change the subject and get him talking a little. Him and yourself.

Dr. Chilton began to tell you about the upcoming preparations: not much, but to lift the spirits (of the staff, not the criminals), there were indeed decorations planned, and yes — a tree. Usually they put up an artificial one, not particularly remarkable, but this year Dr. Chilton decided to order a large live one, and no one in the world would be able to get the reason out of him.

“Excellent,” you approved of his entire story. “I love garlands.”

Dr. Chilton started to say something again, but you were distracted by his socks, visible when he crossed his legs. Plain black. You imagined how his whole image would change if they were the cheerful Christmas socks that almost all the stores were starting to sell. You could give him one pair of those. Would he wear them without risking offending you?

You felt like — a little more and yes.

“…better?”

I think he asked something like “Are you feeling better?”

You could say that you weren’t feeling bad. Or that you would feel better when you were reunited with your criminal. Or that you would never feel better. But truth wasn’t on the agenda today.

“Yes, it is getting better,” you agreed. “Some thoughts are… receding.”

Dr. Chilton was very pleased with your answer, although he didn’t know what exactly you were talking about. Perhaps not what he wanted.

“Do you want to discuss this today?”

He didn't even pick up his notebook, although it was a mandatory attribute of visiting his office. It seemed that even “office” communication was becoming more and more casual. Or the notebook ran out of pages. You'll have to steal it.

“No,” you answered, standing up. Dr. Chilton also got up from his chair. “Something else.”

“What?”

You took a step toward him.

“You got my messages, right?”

For the first time in your memory, Dr. Chilton flushed.

“Yes,” he said in a voice that made you smirk: it was clear he'd read them several times.

You stepped closer, not taking your eyes off him. Quite eloquent, you hoped.

“Let's... have lunch at my place.”

The fact that he didn't say dinner meant he couldn't wait it to dinner.

“In...” he looked at his phone, which was now as much yours, “...half an hour.”

“No.”

“No?”

“I don't want to go anywhere.”

You took the last step, standing right next to Dr. Chilton.

“And I don't want to wait,” you added, looking into his eyes.

You thought your heart would beat in indignation, but it didn't beat at all. At least, you didn't feel it. It probably just already exists separately from you, unable to bear all this.

“You...”

“In here,” you said, putting your hands on his shoulders.

Despite his next words, his hands found their way to your waist.

“In the office? What a nightmare.”

“Why?” you asked, although you knew the answer perfectly well and agreed with it completely. But you had your own reasons for wanting it.

“A terrible vulgar cliché,” Dr. Chilton winced. “I can't believe you like that.”

Truth.

“Sometimes I don't even know what I like,” you chuckled, pulling him towards you by his tie.

Truth.

Dr. Chilton couldn't resist even if he wanted to. But he didn't want. Lately, in your presence, he had only one desire.

Or rather, only one — desire.

“Do you really want this?” he asked when you broke away from the kiss, which you tried your best to portray as passionate.

“Damn, yes.”

Lie.

“I need this,” you added, pushing him toward the desk.

Truth.

The laptop almost slid to the floor, but neither of you cared. You sat on the desk, which was much more comfortable than the antique French fireplace and much more trivial, thinking about the fact that Dr. Chilton hadn’t locked the door to his office. You wrapped your arms around his neck, feeling the fire already starting. The sound you made when you met his warmth was almost sinful. Dr. Chilton barely managed to suppress a groan as you pulled him close. He began to unbutton your blouse, kissing the skin exposed under each button. You pulled off his jacket and threw it on the floor. If the committee could see you now… Dr. Chilton suddenly stopped:

“I don’t have…”

“It doesn’t matter.”

Lie. You encouraged him to continue, and he couldn’t resist. Soon it got hot even for you. Dr. Chilton had his shirt unbuttoned and you were blouseless when the phone rang on that very desk.

“Don't,” you muttered, kissing him again.

More passion. More courage. Just try a little more, and it will be over.

Dr. Chilton had no intention of answering the phone. It seemed as if nothing in the world could tear him away from you, pull him out of this whirlpool into which your hands, your lips, your words, your breath, your heated body, your cold heart so easily drew him. But the phone did not stop ringing, and Dr. Chilton had to pick up the receiver anyway.

Damn it. You were disappointed. That tiny flame that you tried to fan by any means had gone out. Not in Dr. Chilton — he seemed to be easily flammable from your first intimacy. In you. Arousal in miniature, a probe of passion, micro-emotions. You were not a robot after all. You almost succeeded, but the phone call ruined everything. Now nothing would work. So, although the psychiatrist, holding the phone to his ear with one hand, hugged you with the other, not wanting to let go and probably hoping for a continuation, you pulled away and began to put on a blouse.

Dr. Chilton didn't even try to suppress a mournful sigh.

Next chapter (Chapter 53)

Masterlist

[serendipitouslyyyyyy]

finally got around to watching young royals season 3 and i have many many thoughts but mostly im just so happy w how they handled august???

like first off, they held off his apology scene until we were at a point narratively where it is very clear that he is very sincere in his remorse. but then they don't make wilhelm accept the apology. yes the apology is earnest and well meant and good, and yes we genuinely believe that he is going to be better, but wille still doesn't owe it to him to say it's okay and it's so important.

but then the most important part of the whole thing was the scene where nils came out to him and vincent. because in that moment, he realizes that yes, he completely and irreversibly fucked up with wille and simon and maybe he will never fully be able to right that wrong, but at least he can do better this time. at least he can learn and grow and never make that fucking mistake again. and no, it doesn't at all reverse the terrible things he's done, but goddammit he's changing.

and that's what makes it satisfying instead of infuriating when (spoilers) wilhelm abdicates and august becomes next in line. a season ago, august becoming king would be literally worst case scenario and therefore while we all wanted wille to abdicate, it would've still made for a shit ending. but i feel like they really put in the work this season to allow august to really earn our respect and feel like he could deserve that fate.

and it makes a point of emphasizing that he doesn't end up with everything. the narrative doesn't cruelly punish him but this story also does not shy away from the consequences of his actions. he fucked things up with sara, for example, and it made it clear that that was a permanent decision. but he still has a path forward and he still has hope which is so refreshing to see from such a troubled character

in conclusion, it's really hard to handle making shitty characters sympathetic in a world with zero media literacy, but what they did with august this season was just the right amount of nuance to make for honestly one of the most interesting characters in the show.

anyways sorry for the fucking essay i'd be surprised if ANYONE read all that