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i just noticed (thought that has been plaguing me for two weeks) that I accidentally made witch eclipse too emotional and now I have to rewrite (reverse thought process cuz the only thing written was a timeline) his personality to make him a little less uh that
#random#witch eclipse#i think with all the silly stuff i've been drawing with him i kinda just forgot that he's supposed to be cold and cruel and volatile#cuz the way he's coded at the moment means that he's not going to get the pendant by any means necessary so uh#that's gotta be changed somehow#i do like the way i've characterized him tho#in the witch au he's not really as...explosive? as the og eclipse?#like yea he's like that but also he's kinda just? there?#i dunno how to explain it#he was angry and lashing out and everything in the beginning#but after realizing that no one was around to comfort him for his outbreaks#he kinda just. stopped experiencing emotions#he repressed a lot of stuff#that's kinda where his current personality stems from#where he always has to be doing something to prevent his brain from thinking about things he doesn't want to think about#i dunno how I'm going to incorporate lunar into this tho#because his relationship with lunar is similar to how it is in cannon#except he's not verbally abusive to lunar#he's not really physically abusive either#well at least not directly#he doesn't really view lunar as a person#he sort of just sees him as an extension of the pendant and a way to figure out its secrets and whatnot#kc-as caring as he was with eclipse-sort of established the fact that eclipse was just a project to him#this feeling increased greatly after the Argument#but that's where eclipse's behavior towards lunar stems from#anyways#rambles#in the tags specifically#wonder how much of this is gonna save#witch au
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Blocking ppl both makes me feel safer and yet skyrockets my paranoia
#cw for potential derealization#in the tags specifically#following this point on#now#pls don’t read if u think it may trigger u in anyway <3#BUT MAN#it makes me feel strangely like???#seen???#like everyone must be watching me and hating me and they’re all going to get me now#blocking friends of mutuals bc they interact/post v triggering content for me makes me feel awful#like that mutual is going to appear at my house#they’re watching my every move and are gonna be like [mutual why did kite block me ??] and the mutual will be like#[yeah that’s fucking stupid why did she block u] and everyone is going to hate me#they’re gonna turn on me and come to my house and steal my bones#and there’s no one I can talk to bc everyone’s connected#no actually I do have one [1] mutual who I think?? is pretty similar to me in what they like/tolerate#and in the little circle of kvnikida fans I kind of know that if they’re not following X bigger artist something strange abt them is -#probably going on BWHDJSJS- and they’ll never know who they are cuz we never fucking talk#but I appreciate them sm- but man fucking sucks#mental illness right? what’s it like to just be able to ignore things and accept u can’t please everyone?#I need to return to ccs asap LMAO#Before I have a legit paranoid episode over this-
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really glad that i forced my bf to watch wfm with me bc i get to throw my theories at him and be insanely smug a dozen eps later when i turn out to be right, but also unfortunate bc my bf likes gundams and has Strong Opinions on the mechs CONSTANTLY
#him: aerial is boring. the bits are okay#me: the bits are Her Thing tho. that’s her gimmick!#him: yeah and it’s been done! *lists off two or three gundams that also used bits prominently*#and then we went back and forth for like. several minutes.#me being like WELL shes also SENTIENT and i know wing zero and such were sentient but he wasn’t a capital P Person#hes like………… there was a mobile suit in ibo that was like that. thats only one generation away it was literally the last one its not origina#cant fucking talk to this man about mechs he will argue for hours#wfm spoilers#in the tags specifically
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the funniest meltdown ive ever had was in college when i got so overstimulated that i could Not speak, including over text. one of my friends was trying to talk me through it but i was solely using emojis because they were easier than trying to come up with words so he started using primarily emojis as well just to make things feel balanced. this was not the Most effective strategy... until. he tried to ask me "you okay?" but the way he chose to do that was by sending "👉🏼👌🏼❓" and i was so shocked by suddenly being asked if i was dtf that i was like WHAT???? WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME?????????? and thus was verbal again
#yeehaw#1k#5k#10k#posts that got cursed. blasted. im making these tag updates after... 19 hours?#also i have been told it should say speech loss bc nonverbal specifically refers to the permanent state. did not know that!#unfortunately i fear it is so far past containment that even if i edited it now it would do very little. but noted for future reference#edit 2: nvm enough ppl have come to rb it from me directly that i changed the wording a bit. hopefully this makes sense#also. in case anyone is curious. though i doubt anyone who is commenting these things will check the original tags#1) my friend did not do this on purpose in any way. it was not intended to distract me or to hit on me. im a lesbian hes a gay man. cmon now#he felt very bad about it afterwards. i thought it was hilarious but it was very embarrassed and apologetic#2) “why didn't he use 🫵🏼?” didn't exist yet. “why didn't he use 🆗?” dunno! we'd been using a lot of hand emojis. 👌🏼 is an ok sign#like it makes sense. it was just a silly mixup. also No i did not invent 👉🏼👌🏼 as a gesture meaning sex. do you live under a rock#3) nonspeaking episodes are a recurring thing in my life and have been since i was born. this is not a quirky one-time thing#it is a pervasive issue that is very frustrating to both myself and the people i am trying to communicate with. in which trying to speak is#extremely distressing and causes very genuine anguish. this post is not me making light of it it's just a funny thing that happened once#it's no different than if i post about a funny thing that happened in conjunction w a physical disability. it's just me talking abt my life#i don't mind character tags tho. those can be entertaining. i don't know what any of you are talking about#Except the ppl who have said this is pego/ryu or wang/xian. those people i understand and respect#if you use it as a writing prompt that's fine but send it to me. i want to see it#aaaand i think that's it. everyday im tempted to turn off rbs on it. it hasn't even been a week
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sometimes you just have to let yourself be a bit neurodivergent.
i hate going out, it gives me a lot of anxiety and sensory input that i dont like, and i am often forced to talk to people.
so i do this thing on more difficult days, or sometimes just for fun, where i "bring a fictional character with me". i walk and imagine Fictional Character walking next to me. they talk to me, reassure me, hype me up, whatever i need them to do.
today dean winchester came christmas shopping with me. he went over the list with me of stuff i needed to get, told me i was doing a good job every time i finished in a certain shop, reminded me to take a deep breath when i got a little overwhelmed.
and yea. its kinda silly. and i know its just me talking to myself in a different voice, but it Works! especially since all of my special interests/hyperfixations tend to be tv/movie related.
so do what you gotta do to Get Shit Done. stop holding yourself to neurotypical standards. if you need Fictional Character to tell you you're doing a good job, do it! if you need Favourite Singer to walk you to school, do it! yea it might feel silly but you're literally fighting against your own brain to get stuff done every single day. you can have a little self indulgent daydream, as a treat.
#autism#actually autistic#adhd#audhd#actually adhd#neurodivergent#im tagging adhd and autism because that is specifically what i have#this post can apply to any neurodivergent people who feel it helps#i am fully aware that neurodivergent includes people who arent autistic or adhd
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#funny talking tag#My favorite thing to do is HC characters as trans but also that they've never heard that term before and act accordingly.#My other favorite thing to do is make characters repressed.#My other other favorite thing to do is make a character go ''I feel like a(n) object/animal/thing pretending to be a man/woman''#''but I don't really care about that right now I have a job''#Anyway while this post can be about whichever characters you feel fit I made this with a certain character in mind.#(Dimentio of SPM fame) (He has something really specific going on that makes me cackle) (You can ask me about it)#(Also Morceau Oleander is a trans woman to me because she would be happier)#(and she deserves to live a life not defined by other's expectations of her)#Someone put a forbidden and ancient curse on this post so no more.
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✨💫Quick WIP of @kianamaiart 's lil magical girl character! I literally love her design sm (her monotone and "I'm done with life" expressions are my favorite shdgjshaksjsj) ⭐️
It's a bit messy and I need to work on the contrast more so it's easier to read,, but I think the overall composition and colors are nice :)) I might work on it a bit more but ehhhhh what if I said I don't wanna
#idwbamg fanart#i don't want to be a magical girl#fanart#NOT MY CHARACTERS!!#magical girl#strawbunnydoesart#idk if it's ok for me to use the official tag or I'm supposed to just use the fanart specific one??#Ahhhh if I need to change that I will (ノдヽ)
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i have such a love for characters who descend into madness or villainy out of deep, deep empathy. characters who fundamentally cannot cope with the cruel realities they find themselves in and blow up about it in spectacular fashion. fallen angel type characters with tears of outrage in their eyes. characters who break before they bend, and break so badly they splatter blood all over their noble ideals. every variation on it gets me so good
#getou suguru#kaneki ken#abyss twin#i know there are others who im not thinking of rn#feel free to reblog with more examples#aphelion.txt#tropes#WAIT I REMEMBERED MORE#jaina proudmoore#dimitri alexandre blaiddyd#phosphophyllite#i just spent like half an hour trying to find this on tv tropes but it must be. Too specific of a thing i have in mind bc#I just kept finding similar and related but too broad categories#despair event horizon. fallen hero. well intentioned extremist. etc etc etc#like specifically i'm talking about when the character's EMPATHY is the CRUX of the problem. sosooo crunchyjuicytasty#edit:#also just know that i am reading every tag on this post#and enthusiastically scribbling down the names i dont recognizr#so i can check out their series later#edit 2 wow this post blew up 🫡 godspeed fellow villain likers#the amount of people tagging this as 'me lmao' is concerning to me#wwx#how did i fucking forget this was also yllz era wwx
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One of my biggest nitpicks in fiction concerns the feeding of babies. Mothers dying during/shortly after childbirth or the baby being separated form the mother shortly after birth is pretty common in fiction. It is/was also common enough in real life, which is why I think a lot of writers/readers don't think too hard about this. however. Historically, the only reason the vast majority of babies survived being separated from their mother was because there was at least one other woman around to breastfeed them. Before modern formula, yes, people did use other substitutes, but they were rarely, if ever, nutritionally sufficient.
Newborns can't eat adult food. They can't really survive on animal milk. If your story takes place in a world before/without formula, a baby separated from its mother is going to either be nursed by someone else, or starve.
It doesn't have to be a huge plot point, but idk at least don't explicitly describe the situation as excluding the possibility of a wetnurse. "The father or the great grandmother or the neighbor man or the older sibling took and raised the baby completely alone in a cave for a year." Nope. That baby is dead I'm sorry. "The baby was kidnapped shortly after birth by a wizard and hidden away in a secret tower" um quick question was the wizard lactating? "The mother refused to see or touch her child after birth so the baby was left to the care of the ailing grandfather" the grandfather who made the necessary arrangements with women in the neighborhood, right? right? OR THAT GREAT OFFENDER "A newborn baby was left on the doorstep and they brought it in and took care of it no issues" What Are You Going to Feed That Baby. Hello?
Like. It's not impossible, but arrangements are going to have to be made. There are some logistics.
#idk what to tag this#worldbuilding#writing fiction#historical fiction#fantasy#a real-life example: my dad (a pediatrician) was once entrusted with the care of a baby who was born with a rare condition#this was in a place without great hospital/medical access and anyway they were going to fly the baby over#and he specifically asked them to bring the mother and baby#they show up with baby and...the baby's uncle#and he was like. y'all. do you think I asked for the mom to come just for fun??? We don't have formula here. what is the baby going to eat?
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just a kind reminder to please be kind to the people you know with gastrointestinal disorders/conditions! they're embarassing, often very painful - sometimes debilitating - and very hard to talk about without oversharing a lot more than most are comfortable with.
if someone you know:
- spends a lot/long time in the restroom
- has a colostomy bag
- requires diapers or similar implements
- experiences a lot of gas and/or bloating
- requires tube feeding or other alternative methods of nutrition
- has food restrictions (e.g. cannot handle a lot of spices, certain proteins, etc.)
- eats a lot, or only a little
or other similar factors of their life...
please be patient and understanding, it's hard having guts that really like disagreeing with you!
#chronically ill#chronic illness#spoonie#disability#i dont know too many specific conditions so apologies for vague tags
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The bigger they are the harder they fall 🥹🐟
#halsin#clover#bg3#cloverhoney#baldursgate 3#myart#there's a conversation going on twitter rn about the specific types of garbage Clover has eaten#and how Halsin starts tagging along on Clover's morning forages and is by turns charmed and deeply disturbed#also he's 1 willpower point away from just picking him up in his mouth
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You’re placed in a room with an animal. The door is closed and you cannot leave. The animal is completely calm and has no intent of harming you. You are in no danger unless you provoke the animal in some way.
#having a conversation about pathological fears of animal#if you put me in a room with the worlds chillest nicest chimpanzee I would be in hysteric#it’s been that way ever since age 12#that scene in nope was the most validated I’ve ever felt in my life#lea off topic tag#I just want to gauge if people have specific phobias of certain animals
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The greatest injustice ever faced is that I almost certainly started the still thriving "clown husbandry" tag on here, but any discussion about it (from a know your meme page to a youtube video with 500k views) says it's a joke of "unknown origin" or credited to this post, likely bouncing off of mine (which was actively circulating at the time with like 30k notes):
This is a tragedy for many reasons, most of all because it wasn't just an offhand joke but actually a direct response to some of the funniest online hate I ever got:
They're erasing the truest history of tumblr: its desperate need to seethe and argue over every obvious joke with more than 10 notes.
anyways here is the canonical pet clown. according to me
#but tumblr... i am pagliacci#clown husbandry#look strange aeons on youtube. i know you browse this tag.#I don't respect your 2011 tumblr core take on steven moffat#but I will forgive it when you right this wrong#EDIT: a few people think i'm saying i originated the concept of referring to a clown like an animal#i didn't. i mean i made this really specific joke about exotic animal husbandry and a lot of mutuals bounced off of it with similar jokes#and that's what people started tagging 'clown husbandry'#to this day when you look for the origins a lot of mutual's names (who also kept chickens/pigeons/reptiles/etc) pop up because of this
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(look at what i have to offer) — this is the spider's nest.
#wild life smp#grian#<- is that really... his tag...?#grian fanart#life series smp#wanted to also make him wear skizz's tie specifically bec i hc he cant tie it properly himself so its always lopsided#perhaps later on he then wraps it around his fist#anyway this was A LOT . simpler in my head. never again will i draw rails#eydidraws#my art#trafficblr#mcyt#self indulgent drawing for me . maybe ill post the original sillier sketches later :'D#also kinda failed but i wanted to give the illusion of 8 legs so shadow-arm-sleeve-coat (left) / shadow-arm-shadow-coat (right)#* extra edit for clarification: yes my wl! grian is wearing mumbo's jacket (all the rips) and skizz's tie (unharmed since he fell) :D#maybe when they resurrect next time ill draw them without it lmao
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you dislike Luke Castellan because he disagreed with an oppressive government system and actually took action to change the abusive ways him and his peers have been forced to follow for millennia.
I dislike Luke Castellan because in the Titans Curse he manipulated Annabeth, who he raised as his little sister, into holding up the sky, the FUCKING sky, for over 20 hours and had the audacity to walk away as though he was completely apathetic towards it while she begged and pleaded with him to help her.
we are not the same.
#I agree with Luke’s beliefs 100%#I don’t agree with his actions#but I specifically remember Luke seeming real fucking unaffected while leaving Annabeth to endure being literally crushed to death#the rest of the halfbloods that joined the titans army had good intentions but Luke… oh boy#I’m sorry I can’t help but disagree with his actions#percy jackon and the olympians#luke castellan#annabeth chase#percy jackson#percy series#camp half blood#pjo hoo toa#some ppl in the comments pointed out shit I forgot ty guys#like the way he manipulated Silena and Annabeth because he knew they loved him is literally pedophillia 🤢🤮#I was cautious with my tags at first because I thought Luke apologists were gonna come at me with knives if I said more than necessary#but now I’m brave enough to admit I hate that man and no one can convince me otherwise
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i thought i was at my lowest but holy shit it gets lower
#woke up feeling more lost and out of touch with myself.. my surroundings and my partner all in the span of a night.. what the hell..#i really need a new therapist. specifically a dbt therapist but i have really weird health insurance so there's not many options..#i just really need someone that i feel open enough to talk to about anything and that will actually help me and not just use the dumbass#worn out therapist lines..#bpd shitposting#actually bpd#actually mentally ill#bpd#actually borderline#bpd vent#bpd fp#bpd favorite person#bpd mood#bpd problems#sorry 4 the long rant in tags :/
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