#Impossible Tasks

[whump-queen]

“I’m sorry, I’ll do better.”

“I don’t want you better I want you fucking perfect.”

[hislittleraincloud]

OH NO someone fucking help me

I took an XTC pill and she's asking impossible things of me

are you serious right now, Larissa

and what's with the random technicolor scene with the other lady

what is going on

ETA: I actually started doing it but she stopped me at thallium

[alexa-santi-author]

Because I am an enormous dork, I hired @yenthejoline to create an illustration of the lead characters in my award-nominated fantasy romance novella Impossible Tasks. Now I need to finish revising it and indie publish!

[outromoony]

Reading actual books when fanfiction exists is one of the hardest things in the world—how am I supposed to enjoy something that doesn't have Remus Lupin in it?

[ravingsofamadsoutherner]

My Throbbing Opposable Thumb

My Throbbing Opposable Thumb #Blog #Blogger #Blogging #InjuredThumb #Humor #OpposableThumb #SmallTasks #ImpossibleTasks #AllThumbs

“Dinosaurs are extinct today because they lacked opposable thumbs and the brainpower to build a space program.” — Neil deGrasse Tyson Like most people, opposable thumbs are not something I tend to think much about…until yesterday. Yesterday I took a dive, forehead planting just outside my home. Luckily, I chose a large patch of un-mowed clover to crash into. I’d like to blame my puppies, but it…

[aethersea]

I do think Blazing Saddles handled its one depiction of native americans very poorly, and the full extent of its representation of chinese workers on the railroad is they were literally just there. not even one single speaking line. unclear if this is worse or better than the redface.

it's fucking phenomenal at lampooning antiblack racism though. extremely blatant, extremely funny satire, which is constantly and loudly saying "racism is the philosophy of the terminally stupid at best and morally depraved at worst, and we should all be pointing and laughing at them 24/7"

plus the main character is a heroic black man who has to navigate a whole lot of bullshit but is constantly smirking at the extraordinarily stupid racists and inviting the audience into the joke. the one heroic white character is a guy who was suicidally depressed until he met the protagonist and they just instantly became buds, and he's firmly in a supporting role the whole time and happy to be there. the protagonist saves the day with the help of his black friends from the railroad, and uses the position of power he was given to uplift not only those friends, but all the railroad workers of other minorities too, in an explicit show of solidarity.

anyone saying "Blazing Saddles is racist" had better be talking about its treatment of non-black minorities. it had better not be such superficial takes as "oh but they say the n-word all the time" or "they have nazis and the kkk in there!" because goddamn if that's the full extent of your critique I very seriously suggest you read up on media analysis. there is too much going over your head, you need to learn to recognize satire.

[noecoded]

heartbreaking:the worst people you know just started an emo band

[hyunpic]

cant keep my hands to myself… i mean i could but why would i want to 😼 <- skz when they see hyunjin

[strqyr]

redid an old vacuo design for ruby that i never actually finished ✌

not so sure about the color scheme of this one but it is what it is, i fought with it enough as is lol

[whump-queen]

✍️ like 3 months ago u said on discord "I did get an idea about a whumper setting a shock collar to detect whumpees heartrate and go off if it exceeded a certain level… eventually they’d have to force their body to ‘relax’ if they wanted the pain to stop" and i haven't stopped thinking about it since

omg I had completely forgot about this but look what I found sitting in my notes app—

Relax

“How many times do I have to say it, hm?”

content: shock collars, restraints, begging, cruel/sadistic whumper, set up to fail

✧ ─  ༻✦༺  ─ ✧

Whumpee seized as the collar went off again, every muscle in their body tensed and contorted with agony over and over. They didn’t know how many times it took, but at some point they collapsed, limp against the concrete when the current finally stopped.

“P-please—please make it stop.” They let out another choked sob, “I—I can’t do this anymore I—“

Another jolt of electricity sparked straight into their neck and another piercing scream rang out and echoed along the concrete walls.

Whumper only laughed, and when Whumpee looked up at them with those desperate, pleading eyes, Whumper’s lips pursed together and their eyes narrowed. Whumpee knew that look—a mocking gesture of sympathy.

“Awe pet, surely you dont think begging me will do anything, do you?

“I mean,” Whumper lifted their hands up in a universal gesture of innocence, “I’m not even holding a remote right now, am I?”

Whumpee’s eyes widened, “Then how—how are you—“

“I dont control this right now, you do. And if you want it to stop, you’ll need to learn to fucking control yourself.”

It was no use. Their voice kept cracking between words. Whumpee could only let out a pathetic whimper as they sunk limply back into the floor.

Whumper smiled and turned on their heel, snickering when they heard yet another snap of electricity and another desperate shriek of pain.

They reached for the door handle, but a sharp shout from their captive on the floor made their fingers pause.

“Wait! W-wait I— I’ll do anything, I— Please— Please just— just make it st—aaAAGHH—“

Whumper turned to look at the bound shaking figure, twitching with the voltage that never seemed to leave their system for too long.

A condescending smirk slid across their face.

“I’ve already told you. If you want the pain to stop, you’re going to have to relax.”

Whumpee felt fresh, hot tears stream down their face as they watched Whumper disappear through the doorway, locking the door behind them.

✧ ─  ༻✦༺  ─ ✧

there are a lot of scenarios you could do with a premise like this, this was just drabble wip I had in my notes so! may write more of this idea and I invite anyone else to use this idea if you want (if you do, tag me cuz I wanna read it!)

general whump tagljst: @whumpshaped @whumpsday @emmettnet @a-whump-sideblog @whump-it-like-its-hot @wolfeyedwitch @whumper-soot @unorganisedalienrubbish @kira-the-whump-enthusiast @hidden-dreamland @whumpedydump @lonesome--hunter @ashh-ed @whump-in-the-closet @shannon-foraker @oriantthegiant @banditosong @anonymustyou @feralwhump @jieunie-23

lmk if you want to be added/removed from the taglist <3

[cookiesonfire]

telling him to count how many hickies i give him then shoving my fingers into his mouth, playing with his tongue. when he's unable to count, teasing him with "aww am i making you feel so good and stupid that you forgot how to count? such a cute thing unable to do something so easy" shoving my fingers even deeper into his mouth bc his muffled sounds are music to my ears. using my other hand to pull his head back so i can give even more hickies and mark him as mine and only mine.

[jamesheathridge]

sigh....

[crystallizsch]

This is Halloween, this is Halloween Pumpkins scream in the dead of night

PASSES AWAY. i am blaming this post by @anbaisai 😔💪 i am simply not immune to dancing prompts

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

A-Qing, the little fox.

[junotter]

All the jokes about Ken and horses are good but I just wanna say it's such a good parallel to how actual young men get swept into misogyny and the patriarchy.

Like they're told to believe it means men get to be cool and manly and have this power but with that comes extremely rigid commands of what they can be as a man and a cycle of self hatred for never matching those gender roles perfectly. Patriarchy tells men that if they just do exactly what is expected of them, then they get all the "cool stuff" that comes with. That doesn't work though when there's only a small group that actually gets that power, but men will keep trying to fit into those roles in hopes that they can.

In the end there are no horses or the myth men are told, it's just endless cycles of self hatred and ingroup fighting.

[bedknees]

"It's impossible for a piece of media to have a perfect, thematically flawless ending."

Arcane: