#Im happy :] my thing on todays to do list done :] thats great for me I am chillin

[b4kuch1n]

Fic Has Started Posting. Ink Comms Reopening This Saturday (03/06/2023) At 9AM Hanoi/Jakarta Time. I Will Be Putting This Nib Into A Fire

[thetenamongstthesethrees]

TW: REFERENCE TO SH AND RELAPSE OF SH AND SUICIDE ATTEMPT

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Ok so ik ive been inactive for a *WHILE* and im srry for that but like i have a buncha things that happened these past 3 months that I NEED To share SOOOO....

First things first, the one im most excited abt: I DID MY FIRST PERFORMANCE!!! My school was doing little mermaid jr and I got Scuttle! I was really happy to get my first role and getting at least one solo, and Im just happy overall on how it went! I think I did really good on my first try! Only bad thing was that now im kinda going through my lil mermaid hyperfixation and have been looking up fics where Sebastian and Ariel kinda have a Father/Parental Figure-Daughter or Older Brother-Younger (stupid but ultimately well meaning) Sister dynamic and have started to write a fic on that bc no ones done it before apparently😒(im going cray cray, bonkers mayhaps)

Might've gotten my eye infected(I live in the east of the us, new york to be more specific and woke up the day after the "live vintage (BLAME CANADA/j) filter" with my right eyes nerves slightly more irritated and haven't gotten that checked out so thats fun)

FINALLY finished that one drawing ive been making for 3 MONTHS.(well, technically....)

Almost done writing my passion project, AKA the one I originally wanted to make into an animated series but have settled for a book just in case that can't happen! I still need to work out some kinks, design more outfits, get all their personalities in check, make sure the world and magic is fully fleshed out, ect.

I also do band, and while I originally thought that I would have a problem bc of both band and theatres close scheduling(i originally had dress rehearsal on june 2nd, AND my band concert on June 2nd) but it all worked out in the end! My band concert went great, and while the dress rehearsal was a mess, we at least got through it! :)

Unintentionally quit SH! I was originally only meant to stop until AFTER performances, but ive been bettering myself and learned that if I ever want to forgive myself or at least move on I gotta stop feeling sorry for myself and not forget nor forgive, but remember, i just can't let it haunt me. I know I'll relapse, I always do eventually, but I want to enjoy these few moments of mental "clarity" while I can. I've also learned that for some reason i tend to become a more terrible person and despicable person the more time I spend at home with my mother, so that's fun. God, I hate America's education system, its messed me up BAD. AND the foster care system. I just tried to kms 2 times today, and she didn't even notice, or care. How sad is that?

On a lighter note, yes, as the rest of yt and TikTok, I got a minor lil hyperfixation on the Lorax and really think ppl should make more [PLATONIC] Lorax and Onceler dynamics, mainly the type where they're like some really annoying pair of bickering siblings or a father whos sick of his adopted child's shit, like there is so much on the table for platonic fluff and angst and most of what I've seen is romantic smut and fluff like CHANGE IT UP A LIL

Also, Ive been going to karaoke centers on Tuesdays and have become a lot more confident to performing in front of ppl! So far, I've performed "All You Wanna Do", "The Ballad of Jane Doe", "Heart of Stone", and am gonna do "What the World Needs" the next upcoming Tuesday, where I'm gonna try interacting with the audience while singing!!

(Also, before I end this....I may have ADHD??? my teacher who has ADHD says some of my behavior is "similar to hers"(i feel like thats just her way of saying i reek of neurodivergency) and I also did some research and I display similar/exact behaviors listed, have taken online tests from doctorate confirmed sites and basically all of them said to go get a diagnosis. I also found I do a few behaviors similar to stimming! Also also, I kinda suspect a lil more bc my mom has Autism and apparently sometimes neurodivergency is biological (i forgor the word) but my mom is kinda in denial abt my Depression diagnosis and thinks I got anxiety "biologically", so if I tell her I wanna get tested for ADHD shes just kinda gonna gaslight me into not believing that and i already told the school therapist and basically she just told me that I'm probably just imagining things or copying behaviors from my mother and that "kids like to give themselves all these titles nowadays" so I just did what I always do which is to keep it shut and act until they think you fell in line)

So yeah, thats all! Thanks for reading, now that my schedule is clear again ima start posting more frequently again, so be aware :) <3333

[narwhalpanda]

15 questions/15 people

thank you @angry-velociraptor for tagging me! im usually horrible at filling these (i tell myself aw thats sweet, ill do it later and then ill NEVER get back to it) but today im determined to answer some questions >:3c

1. are you named after anyone?

nope, my mom had to change plans for my name last minute so that my birthday and name day didn't fall on the same day. but even the planned name still wasn't an homage to anyone

2. when was the last time you cried?

about two days ago watching the end of Search for Bob (CR1 oneshot) when Liev'tel asks the Raven Queen whether Vex and Keyleth will be happy. that got me good, dammit Liam and Matthew

but overall i am so easily moved to tears its ridiculous

3. do you have kids?

nu-uh

4. do you use sarcasm a lot?

lately i've noticed that it's not always obvious to some of my friends when im joking/sarcastic without malice, so im trying not to unless im sure there cannot be a misunderstanding

5. what’s the first thing you notice about people?

their neutral facial expression (or how the look at me) and height i think?

6. what’s your eye color?

grey-blue, got that from dad's side

7. scary movie or happy endings?

im not much into movies but ive definitely watched more horrors than romantic comedies, so ill go with scary (ive got Mouth of Madness on my list rn)

8. any special talents?

not exactly a talent but id say im weirdly lucky when it counts

9. where were you born?

in czech republic, normal hospital baby

10. what are your hobbies?

drawing is my life long hobby, something i keep coming back to. lately ive become the filthiest of casuals of ttrpgs and im having a blast. also i have been housebound for past three months (icky leg injury) and in that time i got to come back to reading which has also always been my beloved activity, as well as pick up new things like painting minis (ive got little ranger/fighter/wizard mice miniatures and the are tiny and adorable af) and in past few days i got into neocities so im learning html and css to make my own little website and im having so much fun. id like to formally apologize to all my for the time abandoned hobbies, including but not limited to writing, embroidery, linocut and sewing, i swear ill get back to yall some time but now is just not that time.

11. do you have any pets?

currently not :c

12. what sports do you play/have you played?

ive played volleyball for ten years, i stopped playing when i went to college. after that ive done tai-chi for a year, then nothing for a loong time, then i finally decided to hit the gym and get some shoulders, which went great before i felt fit enough to try volleyball again and that is where my 3 month long icky leg injury comes from lmao. but when im healed id love to get fit again (not sure about the volleyball, im super scared but asasdgf it made me so happy to play again), it was brief but awesome, it really is so good for my body and brain to exercise regularly

13. how tall are you?

169 cm, which i think is about 5'6"

14. favorite subject in school?

geography and literature. i wish i remembered more from both high school and uni, man, it was cool to know things about these

15. dream job?

my dream job used to be book editor or librarian. now... ive worked as a librarian for two years now, on two different posts, and i really like the job, tho i eventually wish to do something that is paid a bit better and/or more creative. id like some fun job sometime in my life. but who wouldnt :D

tagging: @lawful-goof @mu-mumie @zraloci-cpr @picachews @zelvuska (feel no obligation you know how it goes :3)

[pwblogarchive]

May 2006

05/02/06 Q&A

question

Hey Pete, so, when can we can expect the new record to come out? Can you give us any information about it?

answer

late fall- info- there will be at least three love songs on it.

question

Hey Pete! If Andy has a diet of chips and mountain dew to make his hair look good, then what do you do to yours??? xoxo

answer

rusty nails, elmers glue and water thats in the bottom of a garbage dump. Yum!

question

Pete, whats yur fav thing to do with a knife? a. stab your self b. stab the guy next to you thats hittin on yur gurl c. stab the monsters in your dreams d. carve in a tree how much luv u have for life

answer

butter my bread and cut patricks pancakes up into little bites for him.

question

what is your favorite song out of “the music or the misery”, “snitches and talkers get stitches and walkers”, and “my heart is the worst kind of weapon”?

answer

i hate that band, they are selloutz.

question

hey peter just wondering in the music video for a little less sixteen candles a little more touch me where did u get your outfit we luv u guys

answer

we had them specially made for the video though we’ve been wearing them onstage on this tour.

question

Hey Pete. Is it true that you guys are now feuding with panic?? because that would suck if you guys are. i am happy for you that you made up with brandon flowers!!

answer

we are totally like feuding with panic. we are going to have a gigantic oil wrestling match between brendon and patrick to see who gets to keep the voice once and for all. bamboozled.

question

got into a fight with some stairs at school today. my feet were in on it. the stairs won. good thing my nose isnt broken. how was your day?

answer

ive got beaten up by the stairs on many occassions. a car window beat me up once too.

question

umm, i know its a wierd questin, but how do you keep you body in such great shape? i mean…WOW! please tell! Lol

answer

my body is falling apart. thank you no days off on tour and 15 foot jumps.

question

if you had kids what would you name them? xoxo love hannah

answer

patrick, joe, andy, and jason.

question

whats your eye color?

answer

it goes between dog poop and spinach with red spots. k thx.

question

you “officially have 22 songs for the new album”. just making sure, are there going to be 22 songs on the album, or are you selecting like 12-13 for the new album?

answer

we arent ready for “use your illusions I and II” - i would expect around 12 songs to make it.

question

peter.peter.pumpkin.eater… whats dirtys real name?

answer

jonathan cecil miller and he works at the red lobster in jacksonville.

question

any tips for learning to play bass?

answer

nah. but if youve got any i could use them.

question

Look, for once in your life maybe you should try reading some of the questions a bit further down the list…………………………yes, you are busy, I know that, but maybe some of us are busy too and dont have time to ask the same question 3 million times a day just so that you can go and ignore it because it was asked slightly too early. I mean, have you got some sort of selective reading problem, where you can only read the first 10 questions or something? Some of us have had some really good or different questions to ask and youve ignored them in favour of “OMFGZZZZZZZZ P33T UR SOOOO HAWTT” and it pisses me off like theres no tomorrow. So yeah, Im done with asking you questions, because you arent going to answer them. There is no point since it feels like Im asking a brick wall what the time is. Have fun answering your “I w4nn4 h4v3 ur b4bi3zzzzzzzzzz” questions.

answer

wow. and look which quesiton i wasted my time on…. the truth is there are sooooo many questions in here. i get to as many as i can. sometimes i hum “its hard out there for a pimp” and dirty does a little dance.

question

How does it feel to be Mr. New Booty?

answer

what is that

question

If unrequited love was in 2005 whats in for 2006?

answer

finding someone you want to pack in your suitcases and take everywhere with you.

5/03/06

question

pete theres this pic of you going around on the boards were you have on a track jacket and big nerdy glasses and sharpie on your hands and some ppl say thers a scar on your chin and some ppl(including me) cant see it. do you have a scar on your chin? if you do how did you get it?

answer

i do. at a show a long time ago my friend mani climbed on my back and my face hit the stage. i also have a scar in my eyebrow from joe trohmans guitar.

question

does fob not do signings anymore? if thats not a sign of selling out im not quite sure what is.. same goes for aar and a little bit oct. fall, hh, and fftl

answer

we do meet and greets and as well every night i look for kids after the show. some venues kick people off the property but i try and find the kids every night.

question

PLEASE READ THIS. I went to the concert in Charlotte yesterday. Nothing I read on the internet was true. I am an OCK. I was there at 10 til 6:00 and I was considered late. I didnt get in early. Well, that was okay. I saw October Fall. & Only me and one other girl knew the words. Yay for us & our mad love for music. Then FFTL came on. I still had about ten minutes before the meet and greet. & I was excited to see their set. Well, when I went to find the M&G place, I couldnt find it. I asked like 10 different people, and they told me 10 different places. When I finally found it, it was 7:23. The guards wouldnt let me in. I saw you, and yelled Hey! & showed you my bracelet. You just kept walking and laughing with the guys. & I had a letter for the band. So, I got someone to put it on stage. Then, the security guy knocked it off and laughed in my face. I did get right at the barricade for your set. I knew EVERY word. Too bad no one around me did. & I got threatened by some 12 yr olds dad that he would get security because I was pushing. But, I was going to be up front no matter what, for your set. Yes, I cried, and yes, it sucked. But I still love you guys. & I always will. I just wish you wouldve gotten my letter. Im bummed.

answer

im sorry. i didnt know you were showing your bracelet. usually when people yell stuff its goofy… you should send your letter though.

question

what is your most cherised memory from high school

answer

leaving it.

question

new booty is a play on “ms. new booty” which is some song by a rapper i cant remember. but the name wouldnt apply to you because youre somewhat lacking in the buttocks area.

answer

are you saying i aint got no junk in the trunk? i do heart bubba sparx

May 6, 2006

The blisters on my thumbs have a love/hate relationship with my sidekick, as does my sense of selfesteem. You get it or you don't. The last week has been amazing. I got the chance to meet lauren hoffman, who wrote one of my favorite songs to fall asleep to. Its so strange to put a face with a song. I also got the chance to hang with some of the guys from the band damnation ad which is oretty much the only thing that got me through age 14 to 18. Its so weird to get nervous and shake around people who sing the words that make you heart beat- but it happens to all of us I think.

Other than that shows have been amazing. I realize that I have based my entire life on maverick from top gun.

Can't wait to hang out with old friends at bamboozle.

Watch out for us on newstands around the end of the month.

Truelove

5/09/06 Q&A

question

Dear Pete, so heres my problem, my parents were divorced when i was eight and now i am 13. my parents have both found new companions and i am vey happy for them. only the thing is my mom and her boyfriend are constantly having indiscreet sex. it is really starting to piss me off. i dont know how i am going to confront my mom about her leaving open condom wrappers in the office. should i just but out and ignore it or should i tell my mom that she needs to be a little more modest? thanx.i heart u 4ever peter.

answer

i think that it is ok for you to bring this up to your mom. do it in a respectful way. i am sure she is unaware that it is bothering you or that you are even noticing.

question

Patrick reminds me of a cute little panda bear, what kind of animal does he remind you of?

answer

maybe a koala bear or something. he is cute but if you get close hes kinda got some vicious claws. besides i could see him sitting around just chilling and eating leaves all day- maybe you were right about the panda though. something cute and smelly.

question

Britney Spears or Christina Aguilera?

answer

billy beckett. you know becks is hotter.

May 10, 2006

the keyboard is unforgiving. it doesn't have much give. it hates the life inside your fingertips, it is jealous. if youre not careful youre gonna write yourself into a corner... her mom had a heart that served as a trophy case for award winning methheads. i couldnt blame her for how she turned out but id love to shoot the scientist that figured out the connection between geneology and behavioral patterns. her trustfund is nothing more than a series of amateur nights in florida strip clubs and an alcohol tolerance like you wouldnt believe. shes a prizefighter past her prime who just wont get out of the ring because its the only thing shes ever known. youre the young buck in fuck me red gloves laced tight, grinning just before the bell in the first round. because you know how the odds stack up. because you know that its just a matter of being faster and hitting harder. you are a wordsmith- imagine the bedside manner of this spin doctor. "sometimes if things are going right you just need to lower your standards". its last call for a shot of conscience...

you remind me of the way things went before all of this. www.myspace.com/thehushsound - wine red demo.

- xo

May 14, 2006

"charlie there is no future in anything. i hope you agree. that is why i like it at war. every day and every night there is a strong possibility that you will get killed and not have to write. i have to write to be happy whether i get paid for it or not. but it is a hell of a disease to be born with. i like to do it. which is even worse. that makes it from a disease into a vice. then i want to do it better than anybody has ever done it which makes it into an obsession. an obsession is terrible. hope you haven't gotten any. thats the only one i have left". ernest hemingway in a letter to charles scribner.

nothing steals the magic from writing the way writing about it does.

but i can't help but have it spin through my head as i read "the old man and the sea" over and over again.

following two plane crashes in africa.

the old man is just an old man.

the fish are just fish.

and the sharks are just sharks.

even in this context i dream of it no less.

this maybe the closest to love that i ever get.

i hate grammar. i hate spell check.

they are tools and trades we focus on when the right words escape us.

while we can use them in a world that we write, where we make our own rules.

they can rob a piece of its life.

for me words are more of a compulsion.

it is involuntary.

it falls in the catagory of breathing and the beating of the heart.

sometimes i want to throw my hands up.

to wave the white flag.

to apologize for everything i havent done yet.

but usually i want to forget the pictures and the rumors.

to become a recollection, a shared memory. visually: a faint, sentimental face that blurs into the background of everything. 

to watch all of the magazines turn to static.

and only be thought of by the clicking of these keys.

its a shot in the dark.

but every boy has got to dream, right?

on my best day, when all the planets have aligned, i still couldnt come close to touching you.

- xo

5/15/06 Q&A

question

whats your fave. item of clothing?

answer

hoodies. bury me in one.

question

What do u think of vegitarians?!

answer

i think everyone should go to www.peta2.com and vote andy as the worlds sexiest vegetarian.

May 16, 2006

take your taste back, peel back your skin. you should try saying no once in awhile.

name names. i wish there were words stronger than fuck you. but face down on a wet carpet, salty eyes i cant think of them. "i really enjoyed kissing you tonight. i wish there hadn't been any interruptions" versus "things happen". the texts flash and youre fucking caught. im addicted to the truth, didn't anyone tell you baby.

this is me broken down.

your fist and my face- because i found you out.

i dont think ive ever met anyone so terrible.

eyes only. 

only you understand this.

idontcareanymore.

- xo

May 17, 2006

“friends that lay together, stay together or how the thoughts in my head go, unfiltered”

forgive me for not showing more remorse- apologies were never really my thing- outside of feeling sorry for myself. the last nail in your coffin got stuck in the mail. youre gonna have to wait. until then focus on love below the waist. they say your head can be a prison- consider this a conjugal visit. my dad calls girls he dated back in highschool "old flames"- like it makes them feel better in his own head. he always asks my mother if "he's still got it?" but would anyone answer this question with a "no", like ever in history? its like i can't think of myself getting older without thinking about the way my father is 30 years older than me. theres not much that terrifies me more.

if i ever freely gave out the details of any of these events- theyd fucking lock me up and throw away the key. but thats okay as long as the place has 24 hour room service and a stocked mini bar.

everything everwhere is a roll of the dice. and the best way to make it through life with hearts and wrists intact is to realize "two out of three aint so bad". except when you throw a hail mary and its not caught. dont bet it all on anyone, ever, except yourself.

ive got alot of "Friends" but only two or three friends. you wouldnt like me if you saw the inside of my head but you might love me anyway.

everyone sends everyone the same lyrics as though they were written exactly for their hearts. but they werent. they were written because someone had a mortgage to pay.

noone owes me anything. no empathy or truth, little trinkets or kind words. at the end of the day im just a boy. and i know that. im okay with that.

she is a STARVINGmakeupARTIST. we exchanged sloppy kisses in the rain until i realized that she was only in it for the rain.

"tell the world to leave me the fuck alone, ie "please find me a home"..."

Posted by xoat 3:31 AM

May 19, 2006

“is that your ego in your pocket pete or are you just happy to see me?”

the truth is it feels foreign everytime a face graces the cover of one of "those" magazines or one of "those" countdowns. because all of the words are about how i wanted to cut my insides out. it makes me feel uneasy. the smile on my face is just so you wont ask whats the matter.today i thought about walking into traffic. not to die but because i am fascinated by injury. its probably good that "those" thoughts are so fleeting.someone thought theyd go out and teach my heart a lesson.lil' wayne "the carter 2" is keeping me out of my mind.

posted by xo @ 1:24 AM

May 20, 2006

“if i could do this all over i dont know that i would have called anyone at all.”

"all i ave in this world is a pistol and a promise, a fistful of dollars, and a list full of problems".spent the day figuring out my size in jeans and then buying two sizes smaller. the rest of the day will be spent painting them on my body.it gets harder everytime i have to pull out of your driveway and fly out of your life. this thing was the reason i met you and you are the reason i wrote the words and it is the reason we are ruined. itd be funny if it wasnt so pathetic.im guessing that if you looked up jealousy in the dictionary- there would be a picture of me.i heart upton sinclair even though he did not write the above quote.

posted by xo @ 4:52 PM

5/20/06 Q&A

question

How did you feel when Lauren Hoffman did a cover of Gin Joints and dedicated it to you?

answer

its amazing. its like someone you really admire saying the stuff you do is ok. besides i think she may have done it better than us.

question

Soo, Brent Wilson is being replaced by some guy connected with TAI? Pop goes the conspiracy theorists. You may want to make a statement soon.

answer

its not really my band so i dont feel that its my place to make a statement. i would just say there are two sides to every story. listen to both, dont immediatly condemn either and dont believe everything you read on the internet. im just glad were talking about something besides my penis.

question

would you rather be engraved in history and remembered as “the band that sold all of those records” or engraved in peoples hearts and memories and remembered as “the band that made the music that changed my life”? there is no right or wrong answer.

answer

i want to be a band that changed the way people look at the world. this is a lofty goal. well see if it happens. but of your two choices, definitely the second.

question

Hey Pete. Have you ever felt like you wanted something to end, but when it does you wish it wasnt over? I want to get out of this high school and this town so bad, but yesterday my best friend graduated and now I wish I could go back to last year because that means he wouldnt have to leave. I have a major fear of change, but at the same time I want everything to be different. Does that make me a hypocrite?

answer

everyone is a hypocrite. i think of change like james bond movies. the actor always changes, the character stays the same. it makes me feel ok. i kind of want to find a way through life like that.

question

Okay, i started this year as a preppy cheerleader, and ended it like a emo-goth. i had a secret love for your band, but never showed it. Now i have to do JV cheerleading next year, and i dont want too. I just want to be a full-FOB fan. They wont let me quit, so how do i show my style through a cheer uniform? Love bunch Pete

answer

honestly. it doesnt matter what you are wearing. look at what i wear. its a disaster. be yourself. the rest will fall into place.

question

if you ever decided to change your name…what would you change it to?

answer

pistol pete or spiderman.

question

Are you sad that the tours over? I am………I miss you guys.

answer

yes. that was the best tour we have ever been on. we got to be such good friends with everyone.

question

Pete, since Joe is Jewish, has he been circumcised??

answer

hold on let me look. Yup.

question

since you basically grew up with hardcore, do you even enjoy playing softcore? Do you even like the music you play?

answer

i love the music we play or we wouldn’t play it. we did for a long time before anyone really cared.

question

What are your 3 favorite movies?

answer

currently: barfly, goonies and ghostbusters 2.

question

How do you want to be remembered when you die?

answer

“a brave man who died honorably trying to rescue orphans from a fire” or some better lie.

question

what part of your body do you dislike the most?

answer

my brain. it makes me behave the way i do.

question

Pete, because your hair grew out are you back to your old hair or do you put like ten thousand gallens of hair jell in it to make it stick up?

answer

who needs gel? showers are for suckers.

question

pete, Juicy Coututre hoodies… in or out for 2006?

answer

that shit is as out as that one growly face i make.

question

What do you think of Mikey now he has had laser eye surgery? His glasses are as much a part of him as his bass! Its like you not wearing a hoodie. Life as we know it, has ended.

answer

sometimes you gotta switch it up. mikey is always gonna be mikey so get back to swooning over him.

May 21, 2006

“at night your body is a canvas”

and i am the greatest artist that has ever lived.currently: trying to lose all my sensitivies and sensibilities. gotta keep running even though we lapped them. trying to become the person i am supposed to be.

posted by xo @ 1:12 PM

May 22, 2006

calm down, charlie brown.

on my way back to pretending to be normal.

real post soon.

so i guess the link i posted isn't working for some people:

there are a couple of new pictures making fun of, oh that one incident out there. 

you should be able to see them in this issue of ap.

gotta laugh at myself, especially at the hushsounds expense.

- xo

May 22, 2006

Holly Golightly: You know those days when you get the mean reds?

Paul Varjak: The mean reds, you mean like the blues?

Holly Golightly: No. The blues are because you are getting fat and maybe it's been raining too long, you're just sad that's all. The mean reds are horrible. Suddenly you're afraid and you don't know what you're afraid of. Do you ever get that feeling?

Paul Varkak: Sure.

Holly Golightly: Well, when I get it the only thing that does any good is to jump in a cab and go to Tiffany's. Calms me down right away. The quietness and the proud look of it; nothing very bad could happen to you then - then I'd buy some furniture and give the cat a name!

posted by xo @ 8:09 PM

May 31, 2006

"the language i speak is hate and my verbs are my fists"

clam up everytime you ever try to say anything real to anyone outloud without the red light or microphone.endearing? pathetic?lose the question marks.edit.we should do this more often.reality television without the cameras.a ticket. a miss. a loss. a cancellation.i am the hot mess,"downtown girls" are more fun, forever. like he said.there is not a single word i could write that would make you understand how i feel right now.please return my spirit to me.its 8am pete, dont you dare go to sleep.

posted by xo @ 12:03 AM

[tarosin]

the great adventures of y/n, tubbo and jack - we built a boat

requested: yes/no

this is part 10 to the great adventures series

you didn’t actually expect to be filming a vlog with tubbo and jack today, you were spending one of you last days away from home with lani at the beach, not knowing that tubbo and jack would make you join them. you ended up finding several rocks you liked and ran off to pick them up thinking tubbo would like them, so you put them in your pocket. whilst you were collecting rocks, lani was on the phone to tubbo letting him know you were actually at the beach if he wanted you to join him in the vlog.

“wait y/ns there? put them on the phone.”

“they’re in the water.”

“why?”

“ill ask, Y/N WHY ARE YOU IN THE WATER?!”

“I FOUND A ROCK THAT MATCHES RANBOOS BRAND BUT A WAVE TOOK IT AWAY FROM ME AND IM NOT LETTING POSEIDON WIN!”

“yeah they’re fighting Poseidon, where are you going to be? ill bring them to you.”

few minutes later you made your way to lani drenched in water.

“i fell…stop laughing!”

“im not!”

“you’re eyes are literally watering because you’re holding in your laughter, anyway look what i got you!”

you placed a clear quartz crystal and a piece of sea glass in lanis hand.

“thank you y/n!! wait this isn’t like your other rocks?”

“i know!! it’s clear quartz and sea glass. i felt like you should have it! i think it’s because i won the battle with Poseidon!”

“you fell.”

“shut up!”

“are you staying at ours again tonight?”

“think so… wanna turn the crystal into a necklace?”

“definitely!”

lani ended up taking you to where tubbo was, but didn’t tell you what was happening, you only found out when you looked up to see jack recording you and lani.

“hold up, guest appearance.”

“oh hi lani…y/n, guess what?”

you looked down to see the boat.

“oh fuck no!”

you walked away laughing, tubbo followed after you dragging you back to the others.

“they said they can’t wait to go on the boat with us jack!”

“how likely is he to be able to build this?? how likely are me and y/n going to drown??”

“uhm good chances!”

“of what?”

“lani, am i going to live or die?”

you laughed as lani walked away shrugging.

“tubbo how much money did you spend on this…”

“£50.”

“oh great i’m drowning today!”

you stood next to jack tilting your head as tubbo attached the sail to the pole.

“just remember if you two die, i’m in your will.”

“i didn’t write a will.”

“well that was your first mistake y/n did!”

“tubbo gets my rock collection, tommy gets whatever he wants just not the rock collection, ranboo gets whatever tommy doesn’t want, and you get what ranboo doesn’t want.”

a few minutes later you helped tubbo put the sail up whilst jack stood filming you both.

“this looks unsafe..”

“and muddy.”

“it’s unsafe and muddy but we’re trying our best.”

“jack didn’t do anything.”

“rude!”

you stood next to lani trying to convince her to go on the boat so you didn’t have to as tubbo tried to lasso jack. after being told no several times, you stood with jack whilst tubbo began to tie a figure of 8, you watched as tubbo began teaching you how to actually tie a figure of 8 using a really morbid story.

“…heh”

“why was that so morbid?”

“we like death on the tubbo channel!”

“i want to go home!”

“no!”

“okay!”

the three of you began to carry the boat out to the sea, however you crashed into something straight away.

“could be worse…could have hit a member of the public.”

“IM TRYING!”

“i can tell…it’s not good enough but i can tell.”

“…TO HIT SOMEONE!”

“NO!”

“my bad T bo!”

“what the fuck did you call me?”

as you were getting ready to go down the ramp, lani looked directly at you and tubbo who were now trying to push each other into the water.

“try not to hit little people in the water!”

“little people…”

“shall we waterproof up?”

you turned around a minute later only to have tubbo holding his phone up to your face after annoying jack with it .

“say hello.”

“hi there , please send help. i’m going to die!”

“ignore y/n, they’re just dramatic..i wouldn’t let them drown.”

you helped tubbo get the boat into the water as jack filmed the pair of you .

“it’s cold.”

“i’ve been in here before…i fell.”

“how cold was it?”

“very.”

“the weed of the sea is in my feet.”

“ew! what the fuck!”

lani noticed you had all let go of the boat and yelled at you all to grab the boat before it left you all behind, jack, and tubbo got in the boat, however you refused as lani kept yelling that the trailer was on.

“oh we’ve left the trailer on.”

“that’s what lani has been saying.”

tubbo got off to untie the trailer and you stood nervously laughing as the wheel fell off .

“i'm actually going to die!”

“it’s fineee!”

you helped jack get out the boat, so you could all fix the boat.

“he thinks we could be doing better.”

“i think everyone could think that.”

jack got on the boat first, then tubbo, who then helped you get onto the boat.

“off we go!”

for the first five minutes, the three of you sat yelling at each other what you all should be doing to make the boat go forwards.

“i quite like this.”

“we’re not moving!”

“exactly!”

soon enough you had figured it all out and waved goodbye to the others after they gave you a thumbs up.

“TO FRANCE!”

“so now what do we do?”

“pray.”

“heh?”

“to what?”

“god..say your final goodbyes we’re going to die!”

“hey that rhymed, you’re a genius!”

at this point the boat had completely stopped moving, however tubbo didn’t think this was the case, and began trying to turn the boat around as it was apparently going to shore, despite the fact you and jack were telling him you all hadn’t moved.

“so what’s the sail for?”

“i mean jack has a point you are paddling.”

“luck!”

“….HEH?”

“y/n you talk to technoblade too much.”

“i’ve been saying heh before i met tommy, what the fuck?”

“jack go up to the front, so y/n can sit next to me.”

jack moved and you sat next to tubbo.

“so how long does it take to go to france?”

“ahh you know, about 20 minutes.”

“how fast do you think we’re going bud?”

“on a, on a, on a train.”

“how would you get the train?”

“i don’t think the train can go across this..”

rather than answering that question tubbo decided he made a hit list.

“we’re going to just go through here.”

“…through where?”

“between the people.”

“NO!”

“you’re creating unnecessary danger.”

you and tubbo started bickering about why he suddenly decided that he was going to hit a bunch of people with the boat for no reason.

“fine you take control y/n!”

“tubbo you were going to kill them!”

“that’s just part of the sailing life!”

you just stared at tubbo shaking your head slightly, trying to process what just happened, then all of a sudden tubbo got up and put you in charge of controlling the boat. you were surprisingly good at it, which was lucky for tubbo and jack who were now leaning out of the boat claiming that they were hiking. they only stopped when the boat began to go faster and noticed you had no idea what you were doing.

“y/n is going to be the reason we crash!”

“yeah i will!”

“why do you sound happy about that?”

“eta france?”

“any second now.”

you decided to focus on making sure the boat was going where you wanted it to go, whilst the others yelled out to the sea occasionally yelling phrases in french as they claimed they could see the french. well you think tubbo was yelling phrases in french, however halfway through you were convinced he started just yelling things in a french accent as he revealed he didn’t actually know french, resulting in jack asking to go to russia as he knows russian.

“y/n, sail is to russia!”

“you know what i don’t wanna drive here you go jack it’s your turn.”

“I DONT KNOW HOW TO DRIVE!”

“we’re sick of this shit aren’t we y/n, jack take that…you’re on the wrong side switch sides with us.”

you all swapped sides and you and tubbo sat with your arms around each other instructing jack how to sail .

“yeah, yeah, yeah.”

“thats good now turn us and we’ll be in the wind.”

“we’re about to catch the wind.”

“JACK MANIFOLD GET READY!”

you all swapped sides again and tubbo whispered in your ear, as you sat next to him, about making the boat capsize so jack would go into the water, jack ended up doing a lot better than you and tubbo did, and you all actually started going pretty fast. however, there was absolutely no way you’d get to land any time soon. you sat laughing with tubbo whilst jack yelled about how he was a fisherman, and that’s why he was doing so well and how he studied their fins so he could find out how fish swim.

“for a £50 boat it’s done us well, look we’re sailing, the water cleaned the boat.”

“we havent died.”

“im a little wet, but not too bad.”

“must be nice.”

“oh yeah you fell earlier.”

“how?”

“they were fighting Poseidon.”

“huh?”

“they probably found a rock they liked and went to get it but it ended up in water.”

“…yeah.”

you all ended up catching the wind and tubbo decided to make you and jack do reaction images.

“help girl, i don’t know how to sail.”

“okay jack your turn, drive and film.”

“hey look i’m filming and driving!”

“no film me and y/n!”

jack filmed the pair of you, tubbo had his arm around you to prevent you from falling out of the boat as you had a habit of leaning out the boat to touch the water. you had no idea what to do so ended up copying tubbo, the pair of you took off your hats .

“tips fedora…what do you want to name our boat?”

“tubboat!”

“no way..”

“THE TUBBOATS REAL NOW!!”

it was around now you and tubbo claimed you were all drifting out to sea, and to just let the wind take you wherever it wants to, whereas jack claimed the boat wasn’t moving at all. you pointed at a boat which was moving a lot quicker than you were.

“HES GOT WIND!”

“WHERES OUR WIND?”

“he stole our wind.”

“we’re stranded jack,y/n.”

you noticed lani and waved out to her.

“LANI!”

“jacks sailing, hes getting sailing tips from my cousins!”

“great can he take us to land?”

“no.”

“YO WERE ZOOMING!”

“i hope we don’t capsize..”

“why would we?”

tubbo looked at you and you nodded back at him.

“hey jack we’re gonna tip this boat!”

and with that the pair of you stood up and began tipping the boat over whilst laughing.

“SUCKER WERE STILL DRY!”

“tubbo i’m about to fall!”

tubbo grabbed your hand keeping you up on the boat with him, you both even managed to get back in the boat without getting wet.

“no, if i’m in you have to be in too.”

jack pushed tubbo into the water tubbo then went on to pull you into the water with him.

“NO!”

“IM FREEZING!”

tubbo helped you onto the boat first as this was the second time you ended up in the water, and you were quite clearly cold, he got on after you. you sat on the boat as he filmed the outro and jumped back into the water. once jack ended the recording, you reached out your hand to tubbo helping him back onto the boat. the way back to shore was you and tubbo clinging onto each other trying to warm up, and the three of you making shit jokes, and enjoying each other’s company. you even made a few more plans for when ranboos in the uk. few hours later you had said goodbye to jack and went back to tubbos house, tubbo let you shower first while he stayed with lani as she streamed.

“chuck your clothes outside the door, i’ll put them in the dryer whilst you shower. you can change into these.”

tubbo gave you a hoodie from his merch collection that would be dropping soon, along with your pyjama pants, 30 minutes later you sat with lani whilst tubbo went off to shower, lani ended up finishing the stream after 15 minutes.

“wanna make the necklaces lani?”

“i’d love to!”

not long later tubbo joined the pair of you.

“oooh tubbo i got you some more rocks, they're over there with your phone.”

you ended up making a couple of them into necklaces for him, so the the three of you had something to help you remember the day.

“y/n, i hope you’re enjoying your stay, youll practically be living here for a few month soon.”

“wait their parents said yes?!”

“what are you all talking about?”

taglist:

@dumb-chaotic-bi-energy @uselesssapphickitten @l0ver0fj0y @etheriaaly @xx-smiley-xx @hawarun @kylobensgirl @cawcaw-pretty-thing @reverse-iak @renleicrashed @augustine-is-joy @c1loudee

[softxhariana]

34+35 live stream

description: ariana’s live stream before debut of 34+35 remix music video.

word count: 2.22k

A/N: little piece based off this live stream that ariana did in the countdown to her releasing the 34+35 remix music video with doja and megan. obvs not included every question but just a few fun bits and harry mentions for you x

also disclaimer, this is NOT real, if u don't wanna read about these two then don't, i’m not tryna act like they’re together it is fiction.

❤ anywayz hope u enjoy luvs xox

❖   "HELLO EVERYONE! thank u for coming to this premier,” ariana smiled sweetly at the camera, as the video cut to a shot of her for the beginning of the countdown.

“we had so much fun making this 34+35 remix video for you, and uhh, we hope you love it.” she continued, playing with her hair. no matter how long she did this for she swore she would never cease to get slightly nervous in these situations. where it was her alone, in front of a camera. but her fans made her feel at ease, and she felt she owed them something, as she hadn’t done many quarantine interviews like other celebs have.

“i thought i would come celebrate and join the countdown with you guys. which is something that I've never done before, but i’m very happy to be here and i was very excited to get some questions from you all...” she held up the sheets of twitter questions she had received, “um that i’m gonna be answering while i’m here so, i cant wait to celebrate this together and countdown and answer some of your questions!” she finished with a smile.

and it was genuine. a real smile that her fans were thrilled to see.

ariana was genuinely so happy and content with her life right now. with her family, her music, her friends, harry. harry her FIANCE!! might she add.

everything just felt perfect, and after all the shit the last couple years had thrown her way, she appreciated the break.

 she got her love back, she was making music that she fully loved, and put her whole soul into, and she had fans who had stuck with her and supported her through some of the darkest times in her life, that were now able to experience her happiness and personal growth with her. so truly, little things like this, felt like the least she could do for them.

“ohh this is a good one because its 34 35 related” she tucked her hair behind her ears, “@noirgrande said ‘ummm its just i wanna the end of 34+35 is it awww shit or nooo shit, i just wanna sing the song right”

“umm it is indeed no shit” she confirmed, smiling matter of factly at the camera before reciting the closing line of the song.

~~~~~~~~~~~

“@arianalocks1223 said ‘will we get to see the track list before the songs release?’” she paused for a second to process - which turned into a few more seconds, she was a bit slow today. she had told harry with full sincerity that she thought it was because she was getting old but he had just cracked up at her absurd statement, and told her that if that was the case he’d still think she was a milf

“you will!” she nodded with certainty, “indeed. ummm... i can tell you them now” she blurted, oops.

“i suppose thats not like... is that against the rules? can i do that?” she turned, to question scooter who was supervising off camera, not wanting to get her label mad at her for releasing too much information, something she has a tendency to do. 

after getting the nod of reassurance from him she turned back to the camera, “so out of ‘POV’, you go into, um, an interlude called ‘someone like u’. after that is a song called ‘test drive’, after that is the 34/35 remix with doja and meg” she smiles lightly, “and after that is a song called ‘worst behaviour’, and after worst behaviour is... a song called ‘main thing’...” she finishes, a shy smirk forming on her face, dimples appearing, “so that’s the tracks.” 

continuing with the countdown, ariana felt her heart warm at the love her fans were giving her and this album. she loved interacting with them and making them happy and proud of her so knowing she had done just that, was an amazing feeling.

“umm hesbloodsline... @hesbloodsline ... i’m really fond of this question because its really to the point, ‘where's the pig and where the fuck is harry?’” she smiled, holding in a laugh.

“piggy’s here, she's great, she's really doing so well and life is really good for her right now, she's really thriving and doing her thing” she ranted, a hint of sarcasm in her voice, “um, i make her big salads everyday that she likes, she's doing really great. she asked me to stop posting her as much because she's actually really offended by a lot of your jokes that you make on twitter, she asked me to have a word with you guys” she continued to joke, well aware that she probably found herself more funny than anyone else did right now.

“she doesn't like the jokes about being eaten, they really hurt her, umm yeh, and she asked me to convey that... no she’s great...” she finally decided to answer, “and harry, is on set today, so um, yeh thats where he is... but don't worry i will tell him to keep you in the loop, i’ve got you” 

ariana unconsciously let a small smile take over her glossed lips when talking about harry. he had been so excited about this new project and seeing him passionate and happy about anything he’s doing, always made her happiest.

~~~~~~~~~~~

“nicole! @nastyctrl. nicole said ‘who helped come up with the concept for the positions music video, love u sm ari’ love you so much to, i love you so much more” she paused, she loved this story,

“um this is actually a really funny story, dave and i had been going back and forth on several different concepts, and i couldn't, like... marry one... i couldn't really, like, really commit to one, i wasn't 100% sold. and it was missing a certain element of empowerment. and i kept, you know, trying to think of things that would make it more impactful cause i wasn't loving what we had...”

“anddd then me and harry were on this huge hike, and he just turned to me and was like, ‘what if you were the president?’ which was like, not at all fitting cause i was dying and complaining the whole time. but i was like,” she tried to imitate a shocked face through her smile and laughed 

“and when i called dave he was like ‘oh... kay, ill call you guys back’ and had the whole production team redo everything, and i had mimi pull completely different outfits and we completely started over cause that idea was what i was, craving and missing. and i was like, wow, thats so perfect” she smiled, shrugging her shoulders, “so yeh, honorary directing credit to harry styles, if you liked that”

~~~~~~~~~~~~

“this is from @borderlinevinyl, who said ‘how much of the album was recorded at your little home studio?’ ummm..” she sang, looking off camera in thought, everything in quarantine had honestly just blurred into one so she was struggling to remember what exactly she recorded where,

“um... a lot of it was... i think i did parts of everything here and parts of things at tommy's i know i did, um, the final chorus ad-libs for positions at home” she began listing in her head, “i know i did all of off the table at home... i know i did the final chorus of my hair at home because we- i-” oops. she had to control the laugh threatening to leave her lips at the lack of subtlety in her correction

“-i got out of the shower and he was like ‘oh your whistles are really here right now’, and i was like y’know what... yeahh they are aren’t they” she laughed as she squinted her eyes and recited that part of the conversation, even trying to imitate his deeper accent.

she had been singing in the shower - as she always did - and harry joining her never seemed to stop her from belting out any whitney or old one direction classic she wanted to. he would even join in sometimes and they'd end up with their own mini concert, dancing around naked, shampoo and conditioner bottles in hand singing their hearts out to everything from high school musical to nicki minaj to fleetwood mac.

while it felt like too bold of statement to make as she truly revelled in and enjoyed everything they did together, showering with him was truly one of her favourite’s. whether it was steamy shower sex that had all glass surfaces in the room fogging up or letting loose and dancing and singing under the pouring water, every moment felt so intimate and sacred. it truly made her feel like they were they only people in the world. 

of course he would claim she was out singing him every time she whistled and would jokingly try to replicate the note but he was truly just in awe off the sounds that came from her mouth (in all senses of the word;)

"-and so i opened ‘my hair’ and just randomly did that” she continued, “um what else did i do here, i did the a lot of the backgrounds and ad-libs for 34+35 here, um, obvious was done at home, a lot of six-thirty was done at home”

caught in her own thoughts she only realised she had probably been droning on for too long when she caught scooters eye across the room and with a blush she shook her head as if to clear it, “this is an annoying answer, everything was kind of all over the place but i did a lot, a lot, a lot of the vocals for the album at the house" she finally finished the long answer, moving on quickly as she realised she didn't have long until the premiere and she wanted to answer as many of the questions as possible.

“ok, second last question from hannah, ever- @everdxystxless, im sorry i don't know how to pronounce that” she laughs looking up at the camera with wide eyes, not sure how exactly how she was supposed to go about pronouncing the username, 

“im sorry, um, but anyway she say’s ‘ari baby, how do you feel about harry getting to do a movie with florence pugh, we know your a big fan of hers, ps. i love you so much!’ well hannah, i love you too” she replies, as she thinks back to when harry first introduced the two, after she had gotten over the initial fangirling, the pair became amazing friends. florence struck ariana as such a genuine, loving person and they shared the same dry sense of humour. plus ariana might of been just a little obsessed with her accent - not that she would ever admit that and scare the girl off.

“and... um, yeah, it literally, made me beyond happy, i was fully like, fangirling when i met her the first time” she laughs as she plays with her hair, “she honestly, probably was like, ‘who the fuck is this girl? what is she doing?’”ariana imitated, a faux scared/weirded out look on her face, playing the part of a mildly pissed off florence - which she luckily had never been on the receiving end of, “im sure i was being the opposite of subtle about it but, no, she really truly is the sweetest, kindest, most beautiful, talented human being” she emphasises, the thought of any news outlets of fan’s trying to spin a ‘jealousy’ story about this making her internally role her eyes,

“midsommar is, like, one of my all time favourite movies, and she's amazing in it, and harry’s like so fucking lucky its crazy. so yeah, thats insane”

~~~~~~~~~

"...so yeah... thank you so much! this was so much fun!” ariana exclaimed as she wrapped up the Q&A, smiling wide at the camera, she knew her fans were going to love the music video and she couldn't wait for them to watch it, plus interacting with them in this way always made her happy.

“i love you guys, i miss you” she reminded, “i am so appreciative of everything you've done for this album, for these singles, for this music. i hope that, um, that this makes you super happy, i hope it makes you smile...we had so much fun shooting it and um, the girls are so fantastic, so i hope you love this and i hope you love the deluxe!” 

ariana didn't know how many more ways she could say thank you and express her gratitude but she still had over a minute and a half so she’d have to come up with something, even if it meant she’d sound like a broken record

“i am so thankful for everything and for the love that you've shown this music i cant even begin to articulate it properly so, thank you! i appreciate it so much” she breathed out all in one, “but anyway, the video should be starting soon, so... i hope you like it, don't refresh! it’ll be here soon... i promise... just don't refresh” she urged dramatically, she was really dragging this out, “but yeh” she got out through laughs “the video should be starting anytime now, i love you guys” she blew a kiss to the camera before moving as close to the lens as possible “byee”.

🖤 there u go!! i hope you liked it, and any feedback would always always be welcomed and so so appreciated pls and thanku x 

[shhh-no-ones-home]

kick back vinny mauro x reader

+++++++++

the song she sings are original lyrics by me, there will be a screenshot of the whole thing in the comments/reblogs if you would like to see it all. there is no sheet music, i am not a musician, but the lyrics are all my own and subject to copyright (/11/06/20/). thanks for understanding

Song: sorry haha I fell asleep by egg

tag list: @musicsexandpizza69 @thisplace-ishaunted @lifeisabitchandsoareyou @svintsandghosts @alilpunkrock @cynic-spirit @theoneandonlykymberlee +++++++++

I looked down at my phone as it rang for the eighth time today. It was Vinny. Again. Couldn't he take the hint? He thought he wanted me but I knew he didn't. How could he? Clearly he wouldn't let it go though. I rolled my eyes and went to put my phone back down when it dinged. He didn't call this time. It was actually a text.

"I know you're ignoring me but I'm gonna keep trying, i told you how i feel and thats not gonna change. Also a heads up, I'll see you on tour."

My eyes went wide before I immediately called our band manager.

"Just the person I wanted to talk to."

She said fairly chipper.

"Tell me we aren't."

I said sternly.

"What?"

She sounded confused.

"Tell me we aren't touring with motionless."

She laughed a little.

"Why would I tell you that? Of course you guys are. isnt it exciting?"

My mouth dropped.

"Why?!"

"Um, because it's good publicity? their manager called me yesterday and asked if you wanted to collab on something too so i hope youve been writing. but back to tour. They are doing a short spring tour, just a few weeks. i figured you were the best breakout band on my label."

She seemed very happy. I sighed into the receiver.

"Dawn their drummer has been calling and texting me for two weeks straight."

She paused.

"Okay?"

I pinched the bridge of my nose.

"He has been trying to get me to go out with him for two weeks straight."

"Oh!"

She said.

"Then what's the problem?"

I rolled my eyes.

"Ya know what, actually there's no problem. this is a great opportunity for our career. When are we starting?"

"Great! I have to call the rest of the girls but you start February third."

I nodded.

"Okay. Two months away. I can put this off till then."

I said more to myself.

"Well dear I've got to go, I'll talk to you when the posters come out."

°°°°°°°°°

i sat on the ground outside the bus and strummed my guitar lightly. id been in contact with all the girls from our band and all the motionless guys for our new song together since i got the call from dawn two months ago but things werent coming out as good as wed hoped. so here i was still working on it, by myself. the thing is though the song was supposed to be out by the end of tour and yet here we all were, one week in and still nothing. i couldnt even focus on the task at hand. i had to much other shit running through my mind.

"that sounds pretty."

i heard from behind me and stiffened my body.

"thanks, ive been trying to find new chords for the song."

i said as vinny came into view.

"well i think it sounds great, when i read through the lyrics you had so far i wasnt really sure how heavy it would end up being but i kinda like that."

he said, moving to sit in front of me. i nodded.

"it will be heavier but my brain wont let me right now."

i said, dropping my hands to my lap. he nodded back.

"well what you have so far sounds beautiful anyways."

i stared at the ground, tapping my fingers lightly against the guitar.

"actually vin, this isnt for the collab. its actually for you and the only reason i cant finish the other song is because im lost."

he raised a brow.

"its for me?"

i sighed.

"i dont exactly know how to talk to you anymore so i figured a song would be easier but its really not."

i said through a nervous laugh.

"ive been meaning to talk to you about that actually."

i shook my head.

"you dont have-"

"no, i do."

he said, sending me a look.

"i shouldve taken the hint in December but i thought that if i persisted then maybe youd see how much i meant what i said. but i guess somewhere along the line i got annoying. hell i know, i did, i was annoying myself. then when you started texting me back, even though it was just about the new song, i was excited. it meant i could still talk to you even if it was just business."

"vin i-"

"please, just listen for a second."

i cleared my throat and nodded.

"okay, lay it on me."

he took a deep breath.

"i want you to know that i did mean what i said, i do really like you and i want to try something, a relationship, casual dates, hell even just hanging out. maybe you dont want more, and thats fine. but i still want you in my life and i want you to know that i do care about you. even if you have been ignoring me on purpose."

i frowned.

"vin i dont know how to do this."

i said, motioning between us.

"all my past relationships have crashed and burned and i dont know how to move on form that. i dont want to have to change who i am again."

he shook his head.

"you dont- you would never have to do that. i like you the way you are, and i want to prove that to you."

i sent him a look.

"no, you like who ive created for you. thats not me. im not carefree and easy going, and agreeable. im pig headed and strongly opinionated and i have a loud mouth."

i said with a laugh. he smiled back at me which i wasnt quite expecting.

"i dont care about all that. i care about you, whether you think youve created someone for me or not. give me stubborn. give me opinionated and loud. hell even give me furious at times. i know thats the real you and yet im still trying. cant you see that?"

i bit the inside of my cheek and thought for a second. then i looked down started strumming again lightly.

"im sorry for making things harder, i never meant to make it this far."

i began singing lightly.

"you dont deserve this mess of a person, i just keep making things hard."

i looked to him and he was staring at me intently.

"we've made it this far, i cant believe youre still around. i thank the heavens cause if not id be six feet down"

i closed my eyes, swaying back and forth as i played.

"Im sorry for making things harder, you dealt with this before. If i make it up to you somehow, we wont have to waste our time no more."

i said softly, over the guitar before stopping and looking at him.

"its not quite done yet."

i said a little shy. he sent me a small smile.

"i love you."

he said and my face went straight. i watched as he scooted his way closer to my side.

"ill always be here for you, no matter how we move forward."

i looked to my lap for a second before looking back to him. he was staring at me longingly.

"i think i love you too vin."

i said, barely above a whisper. he looked between my eyes before his hand moved to graze my cheek. i couldnt help moving into him. before i knew what was happening i was kissing him lightly, his hand going to the back of my head to hold me to him. when he pulled away he had a huge smile on his face.

"the song sounds great by the way."

i laughed a little at that, feeling a blush creep its way to my face as he pressed his forehead to mine.

"our little atypical love song."

[neo-shitty]

toffee!

yeah same, i follow some fic accs that occaisionally post smut and its like mmmmm is the fluff writing enough to balance the posts that gives me finger burn trying to scroll past it? but yeah thats probably the way to go

ah i wasnt there for the teaser but i can imagine that was tantalising. lmaoo yes but to be fair i do have a writing acc called channiesbigheart so... balancing it out? but i absolutely am whipped beyond belief. it was a TRAVESTY how COULD they have. yeah the b sides gave him more lines but they werent the ones that were performed over and over at stages. yessss the line distribution in this album is impeccable, im pretty sure the thunderous stuff was some of their best distribution

hehe i can understand that, sometimes putting someone in a situation so horrible it would be considered a violation of human rights is theraputic, ya know? mmmm the differences are a bit nuts, it was 14 degrees today and in less than a week its going to be 32 or smth. BROOO that would be legendary, i bet theyd treat their artists rlly well and have great music as well ahhh but its a lot of work adn commitment. yES that is a mood if ever i heard one.

its the same in australia as well, sadly, you have people who hold up harry styles and lil nas x for breaking gender roles and wearing make up adn steryotypical womens clothing (and keep in mind i have infinite respect for both of them theyre honestly doing so much for the de-dehumanising of gay people and those who wear whatever they want), and calling the kpop boys gay and other things for doing the same thing, when theyve been doing it for years and gotten no recognition smh its so tragic. yes, anyway YES ONLY 6 MONTHS I AM FOR ALL INTENTS AND PURPOSES A BBY STAN altho i considered myself a fully fledged stay like 2 days after i got into them cos i just spent all day researching and fixating. YES someone said it. it feels like theyre losing a huge chunk of why a lot of people liked their music in teh first place, which was that whole dna, dope, fire mood. and even doing bright songs is fine, liek they should do what they want but i feel liek the western music industry is so fucking toxic that they feel pressured into making these decisions. dont get me wrong, theyre good decisions from a business perspective, theyre getting record breaking sales but still. mmm yeah honestly yg just needs to get its shit together or get out

oooh! not into nct but i see a lot of him, he seems rlly talented. ahh yes another channie ult lmaoo i feel that, my list is growing in leaps and bounds as well. mmm yeah i think i will, im just going to try to save enough money :) mingi appealed to me mostly for the voice (like felix smh what is it with me and deep voiced bois) but also his soft visuals and the whole cutesy thing he has going on i rlly liked. yes i did get into them while he was on hiatus, but im still mostly a casual stan, ill listen to the album when it comes out but i dont think ill obsessively look over everything to do with it, like skz. HAH WE'RE MORE SIMILAR THAN I THOUGHT. lmaooo the thot line describes them perfectly, why are they all so damn attractive. especially seonghwa, like that man looks like a character from a book, cardan greenbriar vibes anyone? mmhmm! his vocals are absolutely insane. ty! yeah im excited altho idk how theyre every going to beat border:carnival, that shit was impeccable. ahh no stress, enjoy teh groups you stan atm!

ahh thank you so much, ill keep that in mind. hehe thats good! hopefully its soon :( ah ty, it means a lot. ill think abt that and hopefully talk abt it a little more :)

ah, no it was inside our gymnasium but to get to the other side of the stage you had to exit the building, go around the back and then enter through the other stage door. ah tysm! im glad too. mmm same, they baffle me. ;n; noo so sad :( ahh, thats um not smth i put on here, but im in high school so make of that what you will :)

thank you! ive done a majority of them, i just have maths, an english presentation and an economic assignment due now so im pretty much home free. yeah i feel like hes the epitome of here for you while being inescapably far away. haha she sounds like one of my friends. lmaooo why is that me. hmmm i feel like youve answered a lot of them in that answer so maybe just ateez, enha, txt and bp? if you stan them? :)

ahhh no problem at all, proud of you for managing to overcome the procrastination! progress! mmm thats good! ahh pls do let me know if you ever decide that, i cant promise i wont cry but do what you gotta do :)

<3 w.a. 🐺

hi! sorry for the late reply, i didn't know how to construct sentences yesterday e.e

yeah sometimes it's the perfect balance! i personally don't like fics that focus mainly on the filth? the plot has to carry the whole fic somehow and the smut is just something to add to the mix. also, i'll follow you on your writing blog! i keep forgetting to do so, damn it.

"sometimes putting someone in a situation so horrible it would be considered a violation of human rights is theraputic, ya know?" putting it this way just silenced me but yes. angst just feels more realistic. it isn't always happy endings irl so i tend to do it a lot.

falling into skz is so easy! it felt like that for me too. stanning them felt like getting sucked into a blackhole. also yes i agree. kpop is nothing but an industry after all and it runs on money so i get why they do what they do as well.

i suggest we not talk about haechan because i will literally not shut up but yes my boy is an ace :( chan is also sooooo easy to love. and the chan's rooms just solidified his place as ult. having something to look forward to every week at a time when my mental health was just plummeting into the depths of tartarus just helped me be stable. oh yeah, mingi's deep voice is indeed sexc. and he has some wack ass duality as well! and i think seonghwa was one of the people i nearly considered as bias just because of his visuals because wow that's one beautiful face. and true, idk how enha's going to beat border:carnival. i don't like all the tracks simply bc of taste preferenceds but i like more than one so i consider that a lot already.

bro that gym should've had some sort of a covered walk :// also i miss being in high school sO DAMN MUCH. but i still feel like i am because time stopped when quarantine started and i was still in senior year at the time.

my ateez bias is wooyoung! it wasn't that much of a shocker to my kpop stan irls because i was a jimin stan for the longest time. enhypen is jake and they kept pointing out that he looked like seungmin sometimes so it's like chan's aussie-ness with a tinge of seungmin (the other guy in my skz bias line, in case i haven't mentioned it). txt is huening kai! i find it hard to believe that he's my age because he looks a lot younger? o.O and he always looks good damn :(( sigh for blackpink it's lisa! i tend to bias the maknaes of yg groups, it's a pattern i've noticed but don't intentionally do!

DON'T WASTE YOUR TEARS OMFG. you can always reach me elsewhere if i like disappear off this blog.

[pbandjesse]

Today was a pretty good day. Though I have a pimple on my cheek and it hurts a lot. It doesnt even look bad, it just hurts!! I went and got tea tree oil and it is helping a little. But still very annoying. 

I didnt sleep great. So getting up was hard. I woke up at 830 but I didnt get up for almost an hour. It was really nice this morning but it would get very heavy and hot later on. Because a storm was coming in. 

But this morning was pretty. I would get washed and dressed and got right into work at 10. I worked for like 3 hours. Both on camp stuff and styling. I chose all the projects for the summer and made supply lists. That took a while. And once that was sent off to Heather I jumped into the styling. 

I had a lot more then I expected to have assigned. I think my limit right now is 4 a day. Once I got to the 5th one my brain wasnt working really well. But I had a good time picking things out. The real issue was when Jess told me I should be saving the notes I send people and I didnt do that for the first 11 people I did!! Ugh. So Then I spent like a half hour making files for each person Ive done and it was just a lot of copying and numbers. But it was all okay in the end. I let my manager know that I hadnt been saving them and if that was alright, but I will save them going forward. It will make things easier Im sure as I get returners. 

Once I was finally done the things I was working on I went and had a little lunch. And then I went for a walk. 

I went over to Walgreens. And got some ice cream cones for me and James. I saw our neighbor and her dog and I waved. But it was hot and I really wanted to just be home. 

I spent the afternoon chilling. Working on my sweatshirt. I did some more organizing. I cleaned the kitchen a little bit. I decided I will do more cleaning tomorrow. 

We did some car emailing. Talked to dad for a bit about it. I think things are going in a good direction. I am still anxious but it will be alright. 

I would get a little upset with James later in the afternoon because they were understanding me about pasta. It was very stupid. But we made up and I made my own pasta. I also made thai tea. Which I should have let steep longer but it still good. I also had most of a half of a cantaloupe. It was very good. 

We would get some crazy rain around that time. The wind was going against the front of our building so none of our plants in the back were an issue.  But it would get worse. Like rain coming in the building. So much lightening. It was wild. Its still raining a bit but its calming down I think.

We had DND tonight and I was really upset when the internet got all messed up. But it was alright in the end and honestly it was one of my favorite games weve played. I also paid very good attention because I had something to do with my hands. I finished my sweatshirt. And I painted the handle of this knife. WIth strawberries. Because thats what I do now apparently. I still need to seal it but Im really happy with how cute it is. 

And the game was fun. I stayed muted the whole time because I was on a delay. So I was just in the chat and I got some great jokes in and now my character has a worm friend named Jim. My new goal is to make them magical. Because they are just a regular earth worm. And we cant have that. 

Now I am showered and ready to get some rest. We put the ac on because its humid. But I hope I can just sleep easy. Tomorrow I will do more styling work. And clean the apartment. Change our sheets. And work on some art. I hope its a good and productive day. For all of us. Goodnight everyone! 

[whorehour]

Wishlist

SIDE NOTE: This was requested but while writing it i accidenly lost the ask beacuse im really dumb:( anyways i hope u like it maureen and im really sorry:((

sypnosis: a one-shot in which yeonjun struggles with buying the reader the perfect birthday present and in the midst of reliving some old memories, they create new ones.  2K WORDS

TW// mild use of vulgur language // very soft fluff

it was 2am when u heard something tick against your bedroom window. you tried to ignore but, it just kept getting louder. as you drew open the curtains you were met with the face of your beloved best friend, choi yeonjun.

"morning sleeping beauty" "its 2am" "the early bird catches the worm" he remarked as he climbed into your room and jumped onto your bed. you want to be mad at him from disturbing your precious sleep but, the truth is that this wasn't something new. it was quite normal for yeonjun to show up at your place at the strangest of times without any warning but that doesnt mean you weren't confused. 

"what's all this about yeonjun" you weren't exactly pleased with this spontaneous visit you valued your sleep and yeonjun knew that. "whats this?" you asked as he shoves a crumbled up piece of paper in you face. "this my dear is your wishlist from when you were 8" "how did you get that?" "we made them together on your 8th birthday, here look you wrote that these are the things you want to acomolish in ten years" the memories of your 8th birthday came flooding back. your mum had invited your friends over for a party and after everyone had left you and yeonjun stayed outside in your backyard colouring. then, yeonjun suggest you make a wishlist list of all the things you wanted to accomplish together before your 18th birthday

"i cant believe you still have this" "of course i still have it, i keep everything that's precious to me." "so you snuk into my room at 2am just to show me this?" "yep!" he smiled clearly very proud of himself. he leaned his head against your beds headboard, his eyes sparkling brighter than any star in the sky. you had to admit that your best friend was indeed beautiful which is why you can't understand why he hasn't gotten a girlfriend yet. not that it bothered you, in fact it would’ve bothered you even more if he did. you've always had a little crush on yeonjun but you never even dared to reveal your true feelings for the sake of the friendship. 

"hello? earth to y/n?" "oh sorry... thank you i love it, really" yeonjun mirrored your smile and with a playful glint in his eyes, he stood up and went back to the window and looked at you as if he was expecting you to follow him.

"what are you doing?" "read number 6" "mc donalds at 2am? really?? now??" "its 2am isn't it? hurry up birthday girl, im hungry" you blinked twice in confusion trying to process all that was happening. you ignorantly thought that the wishlist was the gift paying no attention to its contents, but of course there was always something more when it had to do with yeonjun. 

"are you sure this is legal?" "probably not...hey, dont give me that look this was your idea" you and yeonjun were currently at an abandoned apartment building ready to check number 9 off the wishlist, having a picnic on the roof of an abandoned building under the stars. you had to admit, this birthday present was becoming quite scary, but the thought of getting caught doing something this stupid with your best friend was more than exciting. you finally reached the top floor and opened the door which lead to the roof. the apartment building its self was about 12 stories high so, you were quite high up.

"the views so pretty" "yeah... beautiful" you didn't notice how yeonjun was looking at you with so much love in his eyes. to him you were the most beautiful and precious thing and seeing the way your eyes twinkled with happiness made his heart skip a beat. if it weren't for your impatient whines to set everything up and start eating, he would've told you how he felt right then and there, but everything happens for a reason. 

an hour later and you were both laying under the stars talking and laughing and sometimes not saying a word, the silence was never awkward between you two, in fact you found so much comfort in each others company that sometimes no words were needed.

"did you feel that?" "feel what?" "its raining" "what!? hurry grab the stuff lets-" you were starting to stand up when yoenjun pulled you back down. he reached inside his jean pockets and pulled out the whish list. "number 2" he said nonchalantly. number two was special to both of you. it was something you always wanted to do but never had the chance because your parents would scold you, over time you had forgotten about it...until now. yeonjun stood up and extended his hands to help you get up. he pulled you in close and started swaying from side to side.

"there's no music" you mumbled and right on que, he started humming your favourite song. it was a magical moment, just like you had dreamed about when you were eight. it felt like a movie scene and you didnt want it to end. yeonjun held you close as you rested your head against his chest and whispered and it was at that moment you both realised how deeply in love you were with each other.

"you know, when i was eight years old i considered myself a great artist. however, today...not so much” "come y/n its the last thing on the list we have to do it" "alright fine, open the paint bucket" number 10 was very... ambitious. you wanted to paint a disney castle on one of your bedroom walls. sure the idea was cute, but it would've been cuter if it was done by a professional and not by two teenagers who can barely draw stick figures. but alas, yeonjun insisted to stick to the list and so, here you both where, ready to (ruin) paint over your white bedroom wall. 

"ready y/n?" "nope" "good"

"THATS SO NOT A CASTLE" "WHAT DO MEAN ITS PERFECT" "lets just paint over it yeonjun"  "no. we're leaving it as it is. its got character. you clearly dont understand art." "oh really? do you understand this" as the last word rolled off of your tongue, you painted a nice blue line across yeonjuns arm. he laughed for a second, then got serious and started running after you with a paint brush drenched in white paint. your bedroom filled with laughter and screams as yeonjun picked you up and pinned against the wall. he was so dangerously close to your face that you could feel his breath fan over your lips. you didn't move nor did you want to. yeonjun however, inching closer and closer until you could feel his soft pink lips on yours. the kiss was soft and short after two seconds he pulled back with wide eyes an apology already prepared, but you didnt give him any time to say a word, instead you wrapped your arms around his neck tightly and drew him into a deeper kiss. yeonjun finally relaxed and melted in your embraced as he kissed you back with so much love and passion. his hands snaked around your waist and pulled you closer if that was even possible. you could feel his tongue poke against your lips asking for permission and you willingly let him in. as your tongues battled for danced around in each other’s mouths, yeonjun wrapped his hands around your thighs and lifted you up. you wrapped your legs around his waist as he walked towards the bed where he laid you down softly. 

"you sure this is ok?" he whispered above you.

"more than ok...please, dont stop again" that was enough for yeonjun to strip off his shirt and go back to kissing you. his lips travelled down towards your jaw and down to your neck. he started to kiss all over your neck.until he found your sweet spot. the sound of your breathless moans cause yeonjuns pants to tighten as he littered hickies all over your neck. he pulled back to admire his work and his eyes travelled upwards to find a bright smile on his face. yeonjun felt his heart flutter as the sight and leaned in again to place a chaste kiss on your lips before pulling your top over your head. 

"you're so beautiful" he whispered as his littered kisses all over your chest and stomach. his kisses kept getting lower and lower untill he reached the waistband of your sweats. "may i?" he asked to which you eagerly nodded. he removed your sweatpants dangerously slow which cause you to whine in impatience, earning a breathless laugh from the man above you. you were getting impatient by how slow things were moving so you flipped yeonjun over and sat on his lap. his reaction was priceless, eyes wide and mouth opened ever so slightly he looked like a deer in headlights. he watched eagerly as you reached behind your back to remove your bra and tossed it wherever. 

the sight in fornt of yeonjun was enough for him to buck his hips upwards. his hands travelled towards your chest as you bent down to kiss him again while grinding on him. yeonjun couldn't help but moan, he flipped you over again and stripped himself of his pants and boxers. "like what you see?" yeonjun laughed at your wandering eyes. you didnt respond instead pulled him into another deep kiss but this time it was sloppier. yeonjuns hands slid down and removed your underwear, his lips never leaving yours. you could feel him lining himself into your entrance and gripped his arms which caused yeonjun to pull away from the kiss.  “dont worry, i got you... i wont hurt you i promise” you trusted yeonjun with your life and you couldn't feel safer with him, but you were still nervous. he pushed inside of you and you winced and the streched. yeonjun didn't move a muscle he was so scared of hurting that he waited for your command before he started moving his hips. he kissed your lips to distract you from the pain

"i love you" he whispered "i love you too"yeonjun buried his head into your neck and soon, the pain turned into pleasure and you started moaning in yeonjuns ears."f-faster" you moaned out. yeonjun didnt hesitate to buck his hips forward at a faster rate. he sat up and lifted your legs over his shoulders and moaned at the feeling of your warm walls wrapped tightly around his length. the view of yeonjun moaning and bitimg his lips as his hear stuck to hia forehead due to the sweat, had you moaning and cleanching around him

"fuck- stop that or ill- fuck" he continued to pound into you not caring how loud the two of you were being. yeonjun looked at you and could tell by the way your face was twisting and how you were tightening around him that you were close."come with me baby" his growled in your ear. his voice alone was enough to send you over the edge as you came on his dick. the feeling of your walls pulsing around him caused him to pull out and come on your stomach. the view of yeonjun moaning as he came on you was breathtaking. daringly, you scooped up his cum from your stomach and placed your digits in your mouth, sucking every finger while keeping eye contact with yeonjun. yeonjun moaned at the sight and scooped up the remaining cum and shoved his fingers into your mouth and watched in awe as you sucked his fingers clean. after he pulled his fingers out he leaned in and kissed you once again, tasting himself on your tongue. 

he pulled himself back and laid beside you as you both started up at the ceiling, trying to process all that just happened. "well, that wasn't on the list" you laughed and yeonjun joined in as he pulled you closer. you rested your head against his chest and wrapped your arms around his figure after pulling the covers over both of you. yeonjun kissed the top of your head lovingly and whispered "i love you" “i love you too...we still need to paint over that castle by the way." "ssshhh dont ruin the moment"

[queerlyhalloween]

Not to sound like the joker™️ but i hate western society. I know that hair and clothes aren't gendered, so do most of my mates, ive been working hard at unlearning the internalized transphobia that's just a part of being trans in the UK and actually ALLOWING myself to think about going on hormones and dressing in ways other than "ambigious as possible" despite the fact im non-binary

i grew myself a little mullet because ive not been working in the pub and wanted solid snake hair, ive allowed myself to look at my face and the long hair around it and not despair because i know that longer hair doesn't make me a woman, but the moment you go into a shop, or get takeaway or pass by people in the street its all "move out the way of this lady!" and "thank you, ma'am"

i dont want the gender option of 'other' on my ID i want to know 1 good reason why gender should be listed on an ID in the 1st place

ive just come back from the range and i had my hair up like some e-thot fuckboy, i had to go BACK to the range because they got my click and collect order wrong so ive got two members of staff looking over my order, im dressed in black jeans and a black masc-looking ripped shirt, mask covering half my face and as the manager's showing the kid who served me the receipt they go "oh I served that guy earlier" and the manager corrects them "its a lady". I say "im niether" and they both just stare at me like im a toddler. Im already panicking because the air feels the same way it did when some cunt came after me in the pub toliets. "dont worry about it :)" i say, they both turn back to the tills and completely ignore me.

Anyway, micro-aggressions, ive experienced a lot of them for many reasons over the course of my life and today ive decided to snap.

Not at the people in the range like, just in general.

I will never pass. That's just an element of trans euphoria i will never get to experience. Not right off the bat, anyway. Not where i live, and most likely not in my lifetime. Maybe for kids in LA or Brighton, and hey power to you guys man im happy for you, but people assume or guess m/f when they look at me and they will never get it right.

So when i see people on this site try and twitter etc rank "who's the most oppressed"™️ like a godamn smash bros tier list it blows my mind because of all the things you could spend your days doing thats what youre expending energy on?!

You could be the exact same age, race, sex, gender, sexuality, you could have the exact same disabilities, mental health conditions and money in your bank as another person on this site and you'd still never understand what they've been through. Our experiences, our families, our morals and lives are always gonna be different and the moment you try to write definitive rules on whose got it worse you've already lost and you're already wrong. Oppressed classes are not a fucking hivemind and pretending they are is only going to cause you more problems. I get the strong sense that some of you looked at the word intersectionality, went "ah yeah, i know what that means" having never read up on the matter, then proceeded to play the pain olympics.

And its creating a culture where kids feel the need to spills their souls online to justify living their lives!

You've not listed your disabilites in your bio so you're able-bodied. You're Irish but haven't listed your race so you're white. You're cis man so you've never played with gender and suffered as a result. You're asexual so clearly you're a cringeworthy baby who's never experienced a wrong-doing in their life.

The reverse is true too, if you list every aspect of yourself then you're automatically honest. The more opressed you are the less likely you are of causing harm to others. Psht, don't have a carrd in this day and age? What are you, a fraud? cishet white man playing make believe? Post a selfie or face the wrath of ozymandaus. What's privacy? It takes me 3 minutes to read the bio on this discourse side-blog so clearly they're an angel.

my mam abused me for years, she did the same to my brother when i left home at 18 and my dad drank himself to death. My nan, his mother, never believed me because my mam's a disabled woman with a lot of trauma, and at 14 how do you explain to the woman who takes you to the beach that it's WORSE because as she's beckoning you to the side of her bed so she can scream point blank in your face, or hit you, you're never truely sure, you're thinking about running away because of course she physically can't chase you but she can throw. And then where would you go if you did buggar off?

"You have to sleep sometimes" she used to say to me when I'd piss her off. Other days she told me horror stories about kids in care, and disabled people having their kids taken away, made me promise that I'd always love her and always be her baby, and I'd do that for her because she's my mam, she'd be satisfied then ignore me for a while. I grew up thinking that was entirely normal until i'd tell funny family stories at school and nobody would laugh. The closest I got to truely running away was when I changed my name and pronouns and her rejection, turned to vitriol one night and I so, so, nearly held a knife to my throat and simply fell forwards in the uni showers. Obviously I didn't do that.

But she's had a shitter life than me thus far so she's in the right, as the online black/white dichotomy states. I keep her at arm's length but I'm unable to cut her away without losing the rest of my family because I dared defy the role of eldest child and care for her as I've done my whole life, as is expected.

we need to take things on a case by case basis, and learn when stuff is none of our business.

"Hey! :) I see you've reclaimed (X) slur, without submitting the proper paperwork. Real quick tell me every trauma you've ever experienced or I'll write a callout post :) delete this anonymous message (as is your right) and i'll assume you as sus ❤"

you can only call yourself a dyke if on your 13th birthday, the moon's tender rays struck you through your bedroom window and gave you your first wet dream about girls.

Great, cool. I have no interest in calling myself a dyke, i cant call myself a lesbian because it makes me dysphoric, thats why im queer, but i can assure you that when 3 kids from catholic school pinned me under the bridge and threatened to cut me open for being a "dirty dyke tramp" they didn't play 20Qs with me first to check that i was actually a lesbian.

if your first thought is "well thats just misdirected homophobia, so youre not ACTUALLY a victim" log the fuck off and consider what's wrong with you. Because all our oppressors care about is sniffing out the wrong on you and beating it out, they dont care what breed of wrong it is.

so you're going to spend your day, the enlightened adult that you are, frothing at the mouth because some 15yr old dared call themselves butch despite them being OnLY a BiSexUAl? You're gonna say that trans woman deserves to be suicidal because yes she may be trans BUT she's from the UK, so clearly she loves her horrid country and government. You're gonna say that black lad deserves racial abuse because he's trying to focus on his studies rather than go to protests. That 19yr old who's living in poverty deserves it because they work for Amazon. Texans deserve to freeze to death because there are republicans in Texas.

You're going to harass a complete stranger coming to terms with the parts of themselves society has taught them are worthless at best because they're not doing it the way YOU think is right.

This post has not ended where I started it but I really dont care:

Some of you are so fucking desperate to be the bullies you never got to be in secondary school and it shows. But you're cowards. You can't just admit you want to divide and concur so you do it in a new woke way and when your time on this earth is done, you'll have commited the same pain that's been dealt to you and wonder why you died miserable in a world thats more or less the same.

okay to reblog but dont @ me for a debate because i have, like, real problems and will just block you

[magica-witch-project]

Hi there!! I love your blog and i’d like to make a wish thats alright?? My wish would probably be to stop procrastinating and get things done quicker. I like to spend time alone and i tend to daydream a lot. I like to draw and people tell me i have a great sense of humour. However im a bit of doormat and a people pleaser, so sometimes i let people walk all over me (´；ω；`) have a good birthday!!

Your magical girl form is pale yellow and lavender. Your skirt is pleated with a yellow belt. Your top is flowy with puffy, ruffled sleeves. The top button of your blouse is your soul gem, round and shimmering yellow. Your weapon is a large spear that almost appears to be a large colored pencil. You have an intriguing new power as well: the ability to freeze time! This allows you to get to just the right angle in a fight, making you a skilled fighter. You are fairly well liked by your peers for your humor and willingness to help out your comrades. Outside of your duties, your newfound time freeze ability has made itself useful. While not procrastinating is still a conscious effort, you take comfort in knowing that you will always be able to get your work done in time.

Freezing time is not without its consequences though. It is on one fateful day that you decide to freeze time to work on a project and get distracted- daydreaming, probably. See, this time freeze ability is like any other magical ability you posses. Using it drains your energy from your soul gem, so you have to be careful not to leave it on for too long. You’re usually so good about it, but today, the impossible happened. As your power drains, you begin to become irritable and frantic, as though something is very wrong and you can’t be sure what. By the time you realize what the issue is, it’s too late- your negligence has caused your descent into witchdom. You are now Ligarda, the witch of comics. Her nature is panic. Ligarda’s labyrinth is a surreal one- the whole thing seems to be constructed from pages of old comic books, all hard lines and bright colors. In the labyrinth stands a large wooden desk, which stands out starkly against the cartoony look of the rest of the area. Sitting at the oversized desk is an automaton, or the torso and arms of an automaton, at least. In its hand is a pencil, with which it is frantically sketching something (it is difficult to tell exactly what). Throughout the barrier, the rhythmic tick of a clock echoes loudly, needling at the brain of anyone inside. Ligarda, too, is acutely aware of the passage of time, and it seems that she never has enough of it, leaving her in a constant scramble. If provokes, watch out for the pencil in her hand- it’s quite sharp, and her movements are quick. The best way to defeat her is to strike from the back, where it is more difficult to reach. Upon her defeat, the barrier will fall silent as the papers around scatter.

Thanks for the wish! I know I took a few liberties in the interpretation of your wish, but I thought that the best way to make sure you got things done was to give you ample time to do them. I also wanted to play on the ideas of “crunching” to meet a deadline- a common issue in the comics industry. If there is anything you would like changed, please let me know and I am happy to fix it! I wish I had some good advice on how to avoid procrastination, but I often struggle with that myself. Beyond forcing your way through it, I find that it helps to write a physical to-do list and take breaks in-between each step or activity. I wish you the best of luck in the future!

-Mod Mami ✒️

[imdoingthismspaintadventure]

In which we close a narrative loop and dave is a tsun

Dave: Get the damn beta and save your friend's life!

Let’s get a move on!!

Finally the betas are easily accesible when we want them to be, instead of spending 40 pages finding them by doing things like throwing cakes out the window

This notion strikes you as nonsensical. You can't imagine how a video game could save someone's life, and in any case, you're quite sure no one you know is in any danger.

.... fucking what

Is this before the other things? Have we gone slightly back in time in terms of the general story? Is this while John was fucking around in his room?

....Does this mean that we will lose these betas somehow in the inmediate future because nothing can ever be easy? Oh no

Anyway, these are your copies of the beta you received in the mail recently. You've labeled them with your name in BOLD RED PRINT to distinguish them from your BRO's copies, who labeled his in kind. Neither of you really gives a shit about this game or has any intention of playing it, but you'll be damned if you'll let that get in the way of your campaign of one-upmanship.

What is it with these kids and weird family relationships?

I predict we will lose our copies and we will have to get Bro’s copies, based on that each kid so far has had their parent/authority figure as an antagonistic force.

Dave: Bleat like a goat and piss on your turntable.

Oh god this is indeed a pattern we are going to be following!

We had the “wrong name” bit, the “find your arms” bit, the “idiotic command” bit....Are we going to do them again for GG when they are introduced? I wonder what this command will be then.

You would never consider allowing any fluid even remotely resembling urine to touch your beloved TURNTABLES. That would risk breaking them, and a world without the gift of your godly science just doesn't sound like a place you want any part of. While you're at it, you might as well wipe out human civilization with a meteor or something ridiculous like that which will probably never happen.

I like that the “on your turntable” part is the outrageous part of “bleat like a goat and piss on your turntable” for Dave. Kid values his raps more than his life. Although it’s probably true that the world would be lesser without those wonderful, wonderful things.

And yeah, nothing to worry about with meteors and such, Dave. I’m sure nothing bad will happen, ever. Just like how those game copies you have are going to be safe and accesible forever.

That sort of thing only happens in stupid idiot movies for stupid idiots.

Oh come on, I’m sure you can find a bit of value in them, even if it’s in a “so bad it’s good” kind of way.

==>

...wait, are you really considering it?

You will however contemplate bleating like a goat for IRONICALLY HUMOROUS purposes at a later date.

...I will keep that in mind in case it comes up later.

If PS has taught me anything is that these comics are Chekhov’s armories

Dave: Examine closet.

So inside the closet there is yet another package (probably a gift from John, judging by the pattern we seem to be having. Seriously, do all these kids send each other presents in the same manner? ) and some sort of drink?

This is your closet. This is where you keep a lot of your crap.

Most accurate description of a closet ever

Like that BOX. And that bottle of... what is that? Is that...?

.....

Is that seriously a jar of piss? I would say “wtf” loudly, but your room is such a weird combination of things (including those weird fetus/ dissecated animals/ weeeeird shit) that I wouldn’t even be suprised

Dave: Check the blue box.

.....WHAT?

W-Why is there the BLACK OILY SUBSTANCE THAT STAINED THE KITCHEN WHERE JOHN IS STRANDED IN THE VOID HERE, ON THE PACKAGE??

Does the oil have multiversal properties? If it stains one’s house it also retroactively stains his possesions?? Or is this package from after those events?? Has it gone back in time??

WHAT??

But first let’s stop for a moment to appreciate the fact that Dave has a signed Stiller poster

This is the package that your friend John Egbert sent you for your 13th birthday a little while ago. It now contains nothing except a NOTE and a CERTIFICATE OF AUTHENTICITY vouching for the genuine Hollywood memorabilia which the box originally contained, and which you are now wearing to be IRONIC but also to be INCREDIBLY COOL IN A WAY SOMEHOW INTANGIBLY RELATED TO THE IRONIC NATURE OF THE ACCESSORY. You find it sort of exasperating to explain these subtleties to people.

John gave him the shades!! And they are apparently the real shades Ben Stiller wore in the movie!! That means that they are not *the* universal shades of PS, unless the shades in the Stiller bust were these ones and they somehow ended up there. But isn’t PS a videogame in this universe? But these shades had the universal glow?

Let’s not think too hard about that. It’s probably just an easter egg.

Also Dave please write a thesis on irony, the world needs it please.

The BOX also included a signed photo of BEN STILLER which now proudly hangs above your closet. Proudly and IRONICALLY.

I really like this totally (un)cool hipster kid.

Dave: Take box.

ohwahtthefuck

WHY ARE THE SYLLADEXES GETTING WORSE???

So it classifies things based on the balance of consonants and vocals in the name of the object and assigning an index value like in a hash map.

Oh boy this is a completely useless one in terms of getting shit done quickly, unless you have a godly grasp on words and their composition.

You captchalogue the BOX through your HASH MAP FETCH MODUS. Your modus's current HASH FUNCTION resolves the index by valuing each consonant at 2, and each vowel at 1. The total is divided by your number of cards, and the remainder is the index. BOX = 2 + 1 + 2 = 5 5 % 10 = 5 The BOX is captchalogued in card 5.

Just...LOOK at this

Look at this madness.

Dave: Examine jar of unknown yellow substance in the closet.

I don’t know why, but the combination of the quick turnaround, the fanfare and the fucking apple’s face makes this way more funny than it should be.

So it WAS apple juice after all.

Oh hell yes. It is an unopened container of APPLE JUICE. You thought you were all out. It is like fucking christmas up in here. This is so great. You've got to tell John about this immediately. He'll be so excited.

Oh wait, is this before the first conversation, when Dave and John talked about Little Monsters and Apple Juices? Is this why that conversation was as out of left field as it was?

I see how it all fits together now

Dave: Take juice.

You captchalogue the JUICE into card 7. 2+1+1+2+1 %10 = 7.

Dear god is this system nightmarish

Dave: Access Pesterchum and pester John.

Oh I can see the loop closing!

In addition to letting your buddy know about this outstanding juice windfall, you figure you'll wish him a happy birthday while you're at it. In your own cool, sort of roundabout way of course. Good thing you looked at that box he sent you, or you might have forgotten. You also might as well ask him about that beta. The kid's been harping about it for weeks. It would be cool if it came on his birthday. He'd be one happy camper.

Dave is such a tsundere in his friendships holy shit. You care about your friends a lot you dork

That background is rad

Wtf is “Complete Bullshit” as an app. (Probably some complete bullshit)

Ill beats because the laws of this universe demand it

Hephaestus, isn’t that the god of the blacksmiths and craftsmen? Cool icon. Reminds me of those flash games where the icons all fought each other.

Of course his emote in Pesterchum is  S m o o t h

-- turntechGodhead [TG] began pestering ectoBiologist [EB] at 18:13 -- TG: hey so what sort of insane loot did you rake in today EB: i got a little monsters poster, it's so awesome. i'm going to watch it again today, the applejuice scene was so funny. TG: oh hell that is such a coincidence i just found an unopened container of apple juice in my closet it is like fucking christmas up in here EB: ok thats fine, but i just have one question and then a word of caution. have you ever seen a movie called little monsters starring howie mandel and fred savage? TG: but TG: the seal on the bottle is unbroken TG: are you suggesting someone put piss in my apple juice at the factory EB: all im saying is don't you think monster howie mandel has the power to do something as simple as reseal a bottle? EB: try using your brain numbnuts. TG: why did the fat kid or whoever drank it know what piss tasted like TG: i mean his reaction was nigh instantaneous EB: it was the 15th day in a row howie mandel peed in his juice. TG: ok i can accept that TG: monster B-list celebrity douchebags are cunning and persistent pranksters TG: also fred savage has a really punchable face TG: but who cares about this lets stop talking about it TG: did you get the beta yet EB: no. EB: did you? TG: man i got two copies already TG: but i dont care im not going to play it or anything the game sounds boring TG: did you see how it got slammed in game bro???? EB: game bro is a joke and we both know it. TG: yeah TG: why dont you go check your mail maybe its there now EB: alright.

And they DID indeed have the exact same conversation!!!

We are indeed back in time!!

We are sooooo gonna lose those Betas!!!! : D

[lenjaminmacbuttons]

Hope you’re doing okay, I know there’s been a lot going on the past couple weeks. 🌈🌈💛💛

FOOF YOU CAN SAY THAT AGAIN

thank you for the good vibes anon, i love you and it means a lot to me. however unfortunately now im gonna use this to vent dump exactly how much has been going on the past couple weeks off the top of my head. this is actually pretty far from Everything thats happen but im so tired and dont want to think about any of it anymore

my grandma passed away last week. we were prepared for it and we know she’s at peace in a better place et cetera et cetera, her body was all full of restraints & impediments that she doesnt have to deal with anymore and the next time she’s in a body it’ll be all New And Improved and awesome. i missed so much work in anticipation of this that now i can’t get work off on the day of the funeral, so i can still go to it but i’ll have to go immediately to work right from it and have to pretend everythings fine and dandy and nothings going on.

everyone at work Does know there’s something going on however and the two coworkers i have who are actually like i consider them friends mostly they’re all like Hey Im Here For You Talk About Your Feelings Honestly with me and i. dont. want. to talk about my feelings at work. thats not what work is for and i dont like talking about my feelings anyway and i dont want them to ask anymore

the changes to the handbook and the honor code have completely sunk my heart. i had so much hope up until those hideous ridiculous unfathomably transphobic things they wrote and now i don’t feel like i can trust or have hope in ANYTHING the institution does anymore. ive been up all night going back and forth over whether i want to go to church today. or ever again. it’s not bringing me joy. it’s making me feel anxious and depressed and frustrated and alone. i keep seeing people just on the street or on facebook who are so happy and content with the church and whatever it does and i just…i get struck every single time with this thought of “they don’t care about me. they don’t care about any of these problems. they’re not affected personally by it and so they don’t care.”

and then that makes me feel like such a hypocrite because!!! ive been them too for so long!! what makes this moment so different!!!!! why is this the straw that breaks the camel’s back when the camel should have thrown off the whole burden and run to join its friends at the first strike of the owner’s whip!!!!!!

plus it’s making me feel gross about my mormon memes blogs. idk if i can keep running those anymore.

im failing this semester anyway and i keep getting emails about it. i was planning to take a break from school After this semester but ive missed so much class that i just really can’t go back to any of them so i guess im just dropping out right now. as much as i’d love to participate in all the incredible amazing protests going on right now i really really cant be on campus at all without feeling literally physically ill. and my Hope was to do really well this last semester and then submit mission papers and that way i’d know exactly what next to do with my life until i decide what After, and id be able to Get Out somewhere and travel someplace while still feeling like my life has some semblance of structure and direction. however! HOWEVER!!!!!!!!

i’ve been feeling so, so horrible and so worn down and i dont even know where or what my testimony is anymore. but that’s probably a lot lower on the list of Why I Can’t Serve A Mission, because a. i still don’t trust my Local Bishop enough to talk to him about things The Handbook says to b. i am finding it harder and harder and harder to be perceived as female. i never really have dysphoria about my body or my presentation or anything but like, when people say Sister and Ma’am and Miss and Daughter and Hey Pretty Lady It’s Me Your Relief Society President it’s like…that’s not me. that feels gross. and i wear suits and ties to church, have done so for a while and never get any flak for it, and im gradually working up the nerve to maybe start introducing myself as lev or levi instead of lillie buuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuut. socially transitioning apparently is not allowed.

not to mention my temple recommend expired ages ago anyway. anxiety about bishops prevented me from ever going in for an interview to renew it. i haven’t visited the temple once since before graduating high school. but every time i see it or think about it i long for it so badly and it hurts so much.

and also like, i get that same kinda horrible regretful longing feeling whenever i hear violin music? because i played violin for a few years and then stopped but i still have the instrument because it was given to me by my grandmother. who played it herself until sickness wouldn’t let her anymore and she entrusted it to me and i Stopped Playing but then i hoped to pick it up enough to at least learn how to play her favorite song and aw wouldn’t that be so nice to play that for her on her violin except i never actually got around to printing out the sheet music or practicing At All. and now she’s gone.

and one of the last things she said to me was that she would love to hear my book since her eyesight was too gone to read it so i said i’d record it as soon as i got the right software/hardware to do that and then i never did that either. also i promised alla yalls that book would be Published Published coming up on four months ago now and i still haven’t done that

i took a pair of safety scissors to my forearms as mentioned in a previous post and surprise surprise, the lines have not healed still, it’s getting warmer outside and thus harder to wear long sleeves, and guess what! a while ago on a separate occasion i complained that i kinda wished my self harm scars looked more like the classic cutter lines and Now They Do!! And I Hate It!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and a couple nights ago my little sister saw them and so i told her i got attacked by a spider-pawed bear and fortunately my brother Understands and backed me up like “dang what do they teach in schools these days i cant believe youve never heard of the spider-pawed bears that live in the mountains and are totally normal and real”

and steven universe is ending. that’s a thing.

and like….okay. not everything in my emotions right now is bad. some of it is just complicated. one coworker friend i have recently confessed that she’s had a crush on me for several months now. fortunately when she said this i was able to be honest and say that im not super eager for a relationship right now, im not ready in the slightest to settle down or anything, im still hung up on my high school crush and also dealing with issues from my last relationship, and she replied that’s all perfectly fine and she doesn’t have any expectations and she’s great being friends and we can take things at whatever pace is good

except i also now have a date with said high school crush loosely planned for tomorrow and i told this coworker friend about it and she admitted it’s making her a little jealous and then she said jealous is an ugly word and amended it to Insecure and i feel bad about that

but i also like. am really excited for this date. like it’s not really a for sure romantic capital-d Date and that’s fine, but i haven’t seen this friend irl for so long and ive been missing her so much over this past little while that we’ve been internet chatting and that ive been i guess officially falling back in love with her but i also like, i dont know what her deal is romantically right now i don’t want to presume anything but i really really really am itching to see her

work is stressful. it’s only gonna get more so as weather gets warmer. but we’re getting two new managers with loads of experience and glowing reviews next week. i have hope that they’ll makes things a little lighter.

and there’s also. good things. peridot took off her visor for the first time ever in canon and i saved like 50 different gifs of it to my computer cus it rocked my world. sonic has she-ra toys for the kids meals and i managed to snag a tiny inflatable version of the sword. i’m making cosplays of the tres horny boys from the adventure zone and they’re all very exciting and making things makes me very very happy. i’m finding joy in all the fanfictions i’m writing right now and in talking about dungeons & dragons with my brothers and friends. ducknerva is a very beautiful Good Ending version of marahope which makes me happy and taako is a super effective projection outlet. i bought cupcakes today and they were delicious. and when i think about those good things, when i think about any good thing no matter how small, everything else disappears.

whatever happens happens i guess.

she who lives will see.

[mendesbadrepuation]

Notice Me *Peter Parker* Series

Description: There is this girl and she is no ordinary girl. She has the gift of  a panther. Not just any black panther, a rare line of panthers that lived long ago. Many thought they were extinct until she was found by T’Challa. Tony swooped in and took her under his guidance so that she could start a normal teenage life. She has met Peter before and thats why she so desperately wanted to start school at Midtown High. It’s hard to be a girl that has 10x more senses both emotional and physical than a regular teenager.  All she wants is for Peter to see another side of her. The real her. Will he?

A/N: Yo so like I am a new writer and I write for two different fandoms. I have always had this character in the making and was a little scared to post this. it is a little different and this character belongs to me.  She has a special place in my heart. I know we all dream of being a superhero in some way. I can live that through this character. I hope that everyone enjoys this if you take a chance to read it.  Much love to you all! Thank you :)

~~~~~~~~

When I started at Midtown I knew the reason why I wanted to be there. Hell im pretty sure the entire Avengers new except Peter himself. I wanted to get to know Peter on a different level. He never knew who I was and he had no idea that I was the Blue Panther. Only a handful of people knew because I still wanted to be a kid.

Ever since I was little I have had this gift that was given me to me from my ancestors. I was hidden deep within Wakanda for some time until my powers became too strong. T’Challa came in and let me train and control my powers the right way. One night he requested that I help the Avengers with a mission and I was happy that I agreed. It’s where I met another family and it’s where I met Peter. 

I first met Peter on a mission and I hadn’t even seen his face yet but his voice drew me in. It wasn’t till later when I saw his face. Boy was I a sucker right then and there.

As time went on and I started school at Midtown High, I grew closer to Peter. Tony was my listed parent/guardian and he is the one I convinced to let me go to Midtown. Peter had no idea that I was the blue panther he would talk to on the rooftops of buildings almost every night. It was amazing to have this other identity and Peter tried to keep his a secret as well. Of course I knew and I saw all the moments where he’d disappear at random.

But now after everything that happened. The Blip, losing Tony and Cap, Peter has been working his way up to feeling better. I’ve been there for it all. And finally our trip to Europe was coming. Even I had to admit that this trip was everything we needed. Losing two father figures in my life took a toll on me, but I do know it really effected Peter. Tony and Peter had a bond that no one could ever replace. I was there every night on our rooftop to comfort him and let him talk his feelings out. And I was there in his daily life to give him a great friendship. 

“Peter!” Aunt May calls from the kitchen and snaps me out of my deep thoughts.

“Yeah May?!” Peter calls back as he was throwing t shirts at me to fold. He asked me to come over and help him pack. I was a very good packer and kinda had that “eh” attitude when it came to it.

“Don’t forget to pack-“ she stops talking and I knew what she was about to say, but Peter cuts her off.

“My toothbrush! I know!” He says loudly and quickly. “May, Y/n is here.” He adds back and I smile. I love May like my own family and I was falling in love with Peter.

“Y/n!” May comes around the door and she instantly hugs me from behind. I start giggling.

“Hey May!” I greet her and set the clothes that were in my hands down. I always helped May out whenever she needed advice on guys or what to wear. She had the cutest style.

“I’m going to order us some take out. The usuals?” She goes back out to order from our favorite Chinese place. Peter and I both reply with yes.

“Y/n.” I was still smiling from Aunt May’s encounter as I looked up at Peter.

“Peter.”

“What are your thoughts on MJ?” He asks. My heart beat quickens. This couldn’t be what I think it is.

“She’s a very sweet gal. A different gal but in a good way. She’s also very beautiful.” I take a seat on the edge of his bed.

“You think so?” He kinda perks up and I felt my shoulders slump. It does only seem fair that the guy of my dreams likes someone else.

I nod my head and don’t say another word. I didn’t want to push my luck and really get crushed the night before we left for Europe.

~~~~~~~~~

That next morning I was asleep peacefully on Peter’s couch. He never questioned about where I lived or anything. I told him once before that I live further up in the city. My family was the Avengers. T’ Challa was like a dad to me and my trainer. He taught me everything I know today.

“Y/n!” Peter digs his fingers into my sides and it causes me to wake up on full alert. Whenever that happens my eyes will always flash blue really really bright.

“Peter!” I keep my head down on floor. He scared me so much I rolled off the couch.

“Oh my gosh are you okay??” He takes ahold of my waist and pulls me up. I look at him and he looks at my eyes. “Woah.” I move my head down quickly and act like I dropped something.

When I looked back at Peter he scans my eyes again to see what he thought he saw. “Peter. You okay?” I ask.

“Yeah. Just thought I saw something.” He shrugs it off and I turn around to head towards the bathroom. It was about 6 in the morning and it was much earlier than what I’m use to.

I clean myself up for the morning and get ready for the day. I checked to make sure that I had packed everything for our trip.

“It’s going to be a little cold down there guys. Peter I packed you a few jackets. Y/n I put one or two of Peter’s in your bag just in case.” My face heats up at the thought of wearing one of Peter’s jackets. That sent my body into overdrive.

“Thanks Aunt May.” Peter and I both say.

~~~

After we had went through security and everything else that happens at the airport. We were finally on the plane. I got so lucky that it was Ned, Peter, and me all in one row.

“We can have a marathon!” I say to Peter. He smiles at that and before we knew it we were taking off.

Later I remember Peter excusing himself and going to the bathroom. I don’t know why but when he was gone for awhile I look back to see him talking to MJ. There was this smile on his face and I instantly got sad. I could never compare to MJ and that was the truth.

I remembered that May put a hoodie in my backpack and I dig it out. It was a dark blue hoodie that had a science emblem decorated on it. It was extremely soft and most of all it smelled just like Peter. My heart was full when I put it on.

When I look over I see Ned smiling at me. “Is that Peter’s?” He asks.

“Yeah. May packed us some extras that’s all.” Ned grins and then I see Peter coming back to his seat. He looks down at Ned like he was ready to tell him something. I watch him look at me and his facial expression just turns soft.

“Is that mine?” Peter asks.

“Uh-yeah. Remember May packed them for us. If it’s like too weird or you know you don’t want MJ to know I can take it off.” I ramble my words out.

“No. No. No it’s okay. It looks good on you.” My face turns hot red and I felt my senses heat up.

“Thank you.” I whisper in shock and Peter returns to his seat.

The rest of the plane ride we watched some marathon of Star Wars that Peter downloaded. Ned was playing his video games and it was relaxing to just be in this moment.

Once we had landed and went through the airport we were directly shuffled to our hotel. We got on a boat that took us through the little town of Venice. It was beautiful and I couldn’t help but just stare in awe. I look behind me and see Peter staring at MJ. I sigh as we continue on and I see Ned looking at me. I didn’t want to raise any alarms so I act like I didn’t see him staring back at me.

“Alright kids here is our hotel.” The boats pull up to this shady building that was having some construction done on it. We pull our bags out and walk in. It was even worse inside but you get what you pay for.

“Go put your stuff in the room and we will get to touring!” All of us run upstairs and get to our rooms. I was rooming with MJ and that made me more nervous than anything.

“So I guess were rooming together.” MJ says randomly and I nod my head.

“It looks to be that way.” I shrug out of the hoodie I had on and put my things together in my bag. I didn’t want to pack my suit but my suit was a different technology. Shuri designed a necklace for me that would activate my suit whenever needed. Mine was always with me. Even though it was suppose to be a vacation you just never know what could happen. 

There was a knock at the door and I was hidden behind the door. “MJ.” I hear Peter’s sweet voice.

“Peter.” Her voice perks up.

“You wanna walk together while we tour?” Peter asks and MJ nor Peter could see my frowning face.

“Sure.” She replies and she grabs her stuff walking out of the room. I sit on the bed and put my hands in my face. A loud groan escaped my mouth and I just collapsed on to the bed.

Another knock comes at the door. “Y/n?” Ned says kindly. “You coming?”

“Yeah. Right behind you bud.” I get up and place my back pack on my shoulders. With my camera in hand I follow in behind Ned who tries to tell me about his new findings on Venice.

We toured around for awhile and got to see all the cool tourist attractions. I was loving the culture as well as the beautiful language that came with it. We got to a spot where there was a bridge and the light was shining perfectly on it. The buildings around it were making the colors just pop. Peter was standing there looking out and I take the opportunity to snap a picture of him.

I hear something stir around in the water and I look down. Peter and I stare at the water as it begins to pick up pace. A huge gush of water shoots up and a figure made of water comes out.

“Holy shit.” I say and Peter looks at MJ then me.

“Run. Move.” Peter pushes us both up the street.

“Go guys go!” Peter pushes us around the corner. “Ned get them somewhere safe. I left my suit in my room. But I can’t use it because then everyone will know. Just get them out of here.” I use my senses to hear him. I usher everyone on up the street to safety.

“Go inside here guys!” I shout and put them in a building so they are out of destruction.

“Blue.” I hear through my small ear piece that’s built into my suit. “Do you copy. Code Blue.” I hear Fury say again.

“I’m going to go make sure Peter is okay!” I say and run out of the door to try and find Peter. “I copy Fury. I’m here with Parker but he doesn’t know my identity.” I say.

“Suit up and help him out. Try to stay hidden.” Nick replies. I make the X with my arms and my suit engages. Instantly my hair is placed into two braids and my mask surrounds me. I can analyze everything as I hear the sound of my suit shifting to its full power.

I push off the ground and fly towards the huge figure of water. “Peter I’m here to help.” I land next to him on the building he was perched on.

“What the heck Blue!? Are you following me?” I was almost offended that that’s the first thing he says to me.

“No. I’ve been here for two days now on a special call from Furry.” My tone was bitter. Just as bitter as his was. That’s when we see a green fog coming our way.

“Who is that?” Peter asks.

“I don’t know but he’s fighting the water.” I watch for a moment and then engaged my claws. I take a leap off the building and use my claws to slide down the wall.

When I reach a close enough distance to the figure I tell him I can help. “Just clear his path from the water and I can do the rest. Keep people off the bridge.” I jump from a falling piece of the building flying towards me. I do my best to move people around and get them away from danger.

There was a scream near by and I sprint towards the sound. Around another building I see MJ falling from the sidewalk collapsing. I take a leap off the side of the building and use that force to get me to her faster. My arms grab her waist and I pull her into my body. I twist around to cover her from taking the impact of the concrete.

A hard gasp of air escapes my lungs and I felt something puncture my ribs. Typically my suit would take the impact of it and turn it over to kinetic energy. Shuri designed them that way but I only brought my old suit because I assumed I didn’t need it. “Th-Thank you.” MJ says and I see Ned holding his hand out to help her up to safety. I look over and Peter is hiding behind the wall.

“You’re welcome.” I say. My voice was modified so you couldn’t tell it was me.

I run back to the new guy and I watch as he finally puts the water figure down. I sigh in relief but still felt a sharp pain in my ribs.

“Fury we got it.” I say. A car comes in front of me and the tented windows roll down.

“Get in.” I see Fury and one of the other agents. I climb in the back seat slowly because I could start to feel the workings of a broken rib. I see that Peter was already in the car and I hold on to my side as the car speeds off.

“Seatbelt.” Fury says.

“If I could put the damn seatbelt on I fucking would.” I growl at the pain and Peter looks over at me with a surprised expression.

“Teenagers.” Fury says darkly.

We drive into a tunnel that leads us back to a secluded building. “Let me help you out.” Peter says and comes around to my door. I put my arm around his shoulders and he gently placed his arm around my waist. He helps me walk in behind Fury and the other agent.

Peter sits me down in a chair once we reach a area where other agents were working around. There was a very nice lab and I look around to spot the guy that we seen earlier.

“You guys can call me Beck.” He introduces and I wave at him because I didn’t feel like getting up. One of the agents comes to my aid and uses the technology to scan my inflicted side.

“Can we lay you on the table?” They ask me and I nod my head. Peter walks behind me and helps me up on the table.

“Thanks Parker.” I lay on my non injured side as the agent starts to scan for the injury.

Fury, Beck, and Peter begin talking about what had happened. Beck explains what the water figure was as Peter wigs out about some science facts. Peter holds my hand as the agent presses into my side. The pain made me groan but I kept my composure.

I wish Peter could understand how much it meant for me for him to stay next to me. He held my hand and comforted me the entire time they focused on stitching up my wound.

~~~~~

A little while later after I had met with Fury and Beck to discuss the situations I was back in my hotel room. Everyone was downstairs watching the news to try and figure out what had happened earlier that day. I was in a lot of pain as my body was trying to heal.

I look at myself in the mirror with just a sports bra on to examine further bruises. There were lots of them. I took a hard fall on something but I’m still not sure what punctured my ribs so roughly.

There was a loud knock at my door and I quickly struggle to find a shirt. I see a hoodie on the bed and throw it on. “Yeah?” I open the door and Peter is standing there with a soft smile on his face. I smile back and let him in.

“Hey. I just came to see if you’re okay. I hadn’t seen you since the bridge accident.” Peter walks over to the bed and I take a seat next to him.

“I’m doing good. It was definitely strange.” I respond faintly. I knew everything but he didn’t know that.

“They are saying on tv that the guy that stopped the thing his name is Mysterio.” I make a hm noise. My eyes look up at Peter’s and I couldn’t help but blush at those puppy eyes. Why wouldn’t he notice me?

“I better get going. I’m glad you’re okay.” He wraps his arms around my waist and squeezes a little too tight for the moment of pain I was in. I let out a groan of pain and Peter backs away quickly. “Woah! I’m sorry. Are you okay?” Peter panics and I lightly giggle to cover myself up.

“Yeah! Just ran into a brick corner when I was trying to get away from some falling debris. That’s all.” I put my hands on my side to maybe ease the pain.

“Let me look.” Peter says. I slowly pull the hoodie over my shoulders and stand up. I look at just the right moment to catch Peter blushing. Once Peter sees the deep blue bruises he completely panics. “Y/n!” He jumps to his feet to get a closer look at my side.

“Shush! Don’t panic Peter. I’m fine. I don’t want to ruin this trip and freak out everyone.” I grab the hoodie again and pull it over my body. “Promise me you won’t tell anyone?” I hold my pinky out for him to cross. His eyes grow soft with such worry.

“I promise. But just make sure to come get me if it gets worse. Okay?” He places a piece of hair that had fallen out of my messy bun behind my ear. I blush wildly at his sweet action.

“You’ll be the first to know.” Footsteps come walking through the door and I meet MJ’s eyes.

“MJ.” Peter backs away from me. I roll my eyes in frustration. We get so close and then this goddess always has to come in and tear him away from me. All I want is for him to just notice me!

[shhh-no-ones-home]

december 23 - ricky horror

title: one in seven

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its official where i live! marry christmas and happy holidays to yall. i hope you all have a great day and enjoy the last couple fics of the year! thanks again for reading and sharing, i love you all and wish you all the best in 2021.

prompt: Notes and gifts from a "secret Santa" take a strange turn

request from: n/a

tag list: @musicsexandpizza69 @svintsandghosts @alilpunkrock @cynic-spirit @theoneandonlykymberlee @joeynihil @lifeisabitchandsoareyou @thisplace-ishaunted @xyours-eternallyx

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one week. thats all that was left. five days till christmas day and i was all but turned off by the idea of gifts and celebration and parties and everything else that came with the holiday. i think my secret santa knew that though, whoever it was. dont get me wrong, i didnt mind being on the road for christmas, i didnt like the day, and i didnt have family to spend time with so it didnt really matter. but little did i know at the beginning of this that everyday i would wake up to something weirder in my stocking. and not even in a bad way, cause the two things id received already were super awesome.

and yes, it was the guys idea to put stockings up and do secret santa. that way we each got something small the seven days before christmas and the day of we would ultimately find out who our gift giver was over dinner as they gave us one final larger present. and dont get me wrong, i was an excellent gift giver, already two days in and vinny had loved the two things i had secretly slipped into his stocking but i was getting more impatient. i wanted to know who was getting me things only a few people knew i wanted. and ultimately i wanted vinny to know who was giving him his gifts.

when i got up today i wasnt exactly sure what i was going to be pulling out of the stocking hanging outside my bunk. the first day i had gotten a skeleton hand mug, the second day i had gotten a bag of death wish coffee, and i really just wanted to know if the theme would continue. maybe this person was trying to tell me something. i laid in my bunk as my alarm went off, silencing it almost immediately since i was awake already, just staring at the ceiling. i tossed the blanket off and slid out of my bunk slowly, looking up at chris as he leaned back into the opposing one, sipping out of his Starbucks cup from yesterday.

"morning."

i said and he held his cup to me in cheers.

"morning."

he said groggily.

"you check your stocking yet?"

i asked and he nodded.

"yep, todays was a voodoo donut and a starbucks giftcard."

he said with a smile and i laughed.

"guess you get it twice a year now huh."

i said and he nodded contently,

"whats in yours?"

he asked and i turned around, my eyes going wide at how thick it looked. i drew my brows and reached my arm into it. i felt something soft graze my hand before pulling it out.

"awe, its so cute."

i said as i pulled the plush bat out, taking the black silk eye mask off of it and petting its head. i showed it to chris.

"either my secret Santa thinks i sleep too much or not enough."

i said with a laugh, putting the eye mask into my bag next to the coffee and mug. chris laughed a little bit as ricky slid his curtain over from behind him.

"what you guys talking about?"

he asked, rubbing the sleep from his eyes.

"y/n's concerned with the gifts from her secret santa."

chris answered and rick raised a brow.

"how come?"

he asked and i shrugged, hugging the bat to my chest.

"ive gotten two things of coffee so far and two things to sleep with. im getting mixed signals to say the least."

i said with a laugh and he nodded, jumping down from his bunk with a thud.

"maybe they think you needed something to help you keep up the good work, and something to help you relax. you do work harder than all of us combined."

he mentioned, making me smile.

"thanks rick, i guess ill just have to wait another few days and ask when i find out who it is."

i said and he nodded.

"guess so."

---

"okay, this is getting more and more confusing."

i said, unwrapping the fuzzy blanket, holding it out to look at what was on it. the whole thing was solid black with alchemy symbols, pentagrams, crystal balls, and the likeness on it in bright pastel pinks and purples. it was really cute and matched the bat perfectly. all this stuff just had me wondering what i could be getting at dinner. i knew this blanket wasnt cheap, it had a black craft tag on it after all.

"whats confusing?"

vinny asked, holding the new bulls jersey in his hand.

"the theme of these is a little skewed to say the least."

i said and he shrugged.

"that looks comfy."

he said, running his hand over the side of it and i nodded.

"what else have you gotten?"

he asked and i sighed.

"coffee, a mug, a plush bat, a sleep mask, pastel bath bombs, a coffee and honey face scrub mask, fuzzy black and pink socks, and now this blanket. its like a care package."

i said and he shrugged.

"guess youll just have to find out at dinner, which we should probably get ready for."

---

as we all sat around the table i watched intently as we went down the line, each person giving their last gifts.  justin had chris, chris had ryan, ryan had aj, aj had justin, i had vin, vin had rick, and finally rick had me. as he got up he reached for a large box and my eyes went wide.

"okay y/n i know all week youve been trying to figure out what the hell this all could be leading up to but i asked all of the guys if we could pitch in on something so its not just from me."

i drew my brows.

"we all know you work ten times harder than the rest of us so we all wanted to do something special for you."

he said, setting the box down in front of me on the table.

"you guys didnt have to do that. you guys put so much into the band, im nothing special."

i said and he sent me a disapproving look.

"but you are, without you none of this would work. so as a thank you from all of us..."

he said, pointing to the box and i moved slowly to open it, all of them watching me intently. i ripped the paper off first, then going in to rip the tape off it and popping the sides open one at a time. when i pulled the tissue paper out of the way i drew my brows. in it was a large wooden box.

"okay?"

i asked, pulling it out and setting it on the table in place of the carboard box.

"open it."

chris said from across the table and i pushed the gold tab up, lifting the lid. as soon as i saw what was in it my mouth dropped. i wanted to inspect it more but my vision was going blurry at the tears behind my eyes.

"you guys."

i said, closing it and standing up to give rick a hug.

"so i take it you like it?"

he asked and i nodded against him, pulling away and wiping the tears off my face.

"its beautiful."

i said, opening the box back up and looking over the kit of art supplies. there was everything i could ever ask for in here: a water color palette, gouache, oil pastels, soft pastels, colored pencils, drawing pencils, two sketch pads, brushes, the whole nine yards.

"we wanted to get you something that you enjoy and that relaxes you. this whole week ive been building up stuff that could make you comfortable during or after a long work day: comfy stuff to sleep with, coffee when youre running around making sure we're all in line, spa stuff to help you chill at home. they all helped with this idea but we thought it could be something to get you out of the real world when youve had enough. and now youll think of all of us when you use it."

he said with a wide smile and i couldn't help crying again.

"you guys take such good care of me."

i said through a sniffle as vin leaned over and hugged me, then Justin leaned in and did the same, pretty soon all of them were standing around me in big a group hug.

"we love you y/n, we wouldnt get anything done without you and we're so glad to call you a team member and most importantly a friend."

rick said, as they all stood back up and went back to their seats.

"thank you guys, for everything. and thank you especially for making this a special christmas, the most special christmas ive ever had."

he squeezed my shoulder gently.

"youre part of the family now y/n, and we wouldnt want it any other way."