#Idc It Doesn't Matter Fuck That Guy

[bi-lil-guy]

"They Could Never Make Me Hate You" But It's Because I Already Hated Your Ass Of My Own Volition The Second This MF Entered The Frame.

[normystical]

what are we thinking about older meme templates chat

[dukeofthomas]

BTAS Batman feels like a normal human who's really trained and skilled and manages to pull off amazing feats

Comics Batman just feels like a superpowered human

[aroaceofthesea]

Story idea: girl says she's not interested in love, meets a new guy

Plot twist: she doesn't fall in love with him because she's NOT INTERESTED IN LOVE and she finds out she's aro and they become best friends

[opheliac]

what do you do when your boyfriend sucks ass and you feel unloved and inferior all the time and you hate what you've become and he probably does too and you know it's all because of him because you changed for him and he hasn't changed at all

[astonmartinii]

fresh out the slammer [guilty as sin part five] | charles leclerc social media au

pairing: charles leclerc x sainz!reader

no court cases, no ferrari PR jail... i'm sure nothing will happen, right?

MASTERLIST | SERIES MASTERLIST | TIP JAR

f1

liked by charles_leclerc, yourusername and 1,289,405 others

tagged: olliebearman, francocolapinto & pepemarti

f1: THERE IT IS!!! The 2025 grid is set with Ollie Bearman at Haas, Franco Colapinto at Williams and Pepe Marti at Sauber.

view all comments

user317: HOLY SHIT

user318: i hate to celebrate someone losing their job in this economy but FUCK THAT MAN WOO HOO WELCOME TO UNEMPLOYMENT CARLOS SAINZ

olliebearman: can't wait to get started (˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶)

user319: when are you going to recruit pepe and kimi to the leclerc family agenda

pepemarti: y/n has been my celeb crush since i was like 13 (sorry charles) so trust me idc about the spanish guy

olliebearman: he fully doesn't play about y/n, he even tries to read poetry (key word being tries)

pepemarti: you can shame me all you like but i think y/n would appreciate the effort

yourusername: you would be correct !

pepemarti: OMG ٩(^ᗜ^ )و ´-

charles_leclerc: i'll take you in if you promise you're over your crush on y/n, it would be very inappropriate

pepemarti: I AM I SWEAR

user320: i know carlos gotta be sick seeing the spanish youngster freak out more about his sister

yourusername: i fear he has bigger fish to fry right now

user321: @carlossainz55 BOO! did i scare you? i'm a job application

user322: being on the internet as a sainz fan gotta be torture at this point

user323: former delusional carlando fan here! he brought this upon himself lol

maxverstappen1: evil may be conquered but these three and kimi look like prime candidates to join the united front of hating

yourusername: we gotta get them started while they're young

charles_leclerc: i fear we don't have enough room in the house for all these kids

francocolapinto: do we really need the aussie?

oscarpiastri: i was here before you ???

yourusername: we can get bunkbeds?

olliebearman: does leo really need him own room

charles_leclerc: WATCH THAT TONE

kimiantonelli: i'm quite small if that helps

yourusername: looks like we have a new favourite

pepemarti: ????????

user324: see? carlos loses his job and suddenly all is good in f1 again... coincidence? i think not.

yourusername

liked by maxverstappen1, alexalbon and 1,945,209 others

tagged: charles_leclerc, olliebearman & kimiantonelli

yourusername: and the pieces all fall into place ...

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user326: this is a level of motherism we have yet to see in f1

user327: and mother in a literal sense these ones take her up to like five grid kids and one dog

maxverstappen1: don't erase her cat godson and goddaughter

yourusername: leo is almost fully cat trained ( ≧ᗜ≦)

albonpets: do not even think of coming for our brand

yourusername: which one am i talking to?

albonpets: HORSEY

yourusername: ... okay then

charles_leclerc: seriously?

yourusername: i'm not going to fight a (my favourite) albon cat charles, i may have the sainz last name but i'm NOT carlos

charles_leclerc: it'll be leclerc before you know it

yourusername: (˶ ˘ ³˘)ˆᵕ ˆ˶)

user328: no because at this point i can fully picture carlos having an argument with a cat

albonpets: we're down to tussle for y/n

user329: i'm dying, carlos lost so bad ALBON PETS ARE SHADING HIM

user330: guys are we ready for monza tho? y/n and charles fully back, the united front of hating back, italy don't play about charles... carlos girl i'd sit this one out it doesn't even matter that you're driving the red car

maxverstappen1: at least it won't be me being booed for once

carlossainz55: i'm not a bitch. if people want to boo me they'll only expose themselves as sheep

oscarpiastri: BAAAA

olliebearman: BAAAA

francocolapinto: BAAAA

kimiantonelli: BAAAA

pepemarti: BAAAA

charles_leclerc: parenthood is so precious

carlossainz55: you think i care that these little runts like you guys? they'll be out the sport faster than your other little pet american

logansargeant: at least i'm pretty

francocolapinto: sorry i can't hear you over my williams seat - you really thought that was gonna be yours huh 🤔

user331: obsessed with how carlos has just resorted to name calling because his only 'ammunition' against y/n is that she always wanted to marry charles and didn't want to work

user332: if that's illegal LOCK ME UP BABY

yourusername: they nearly did 😭

user332: oh yeah my bad g

charles_leclerc

liked by maxverstappen1, oscarpiastri and 4,398,400 others

tagged: yourusername

charles_leclerc: fresh out the slammer

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user333: LET'S FUCKING GOOOOOOOOOO

francocolapinto: VAMOSSSSSS

user334: this was actually insanely poetic, ferrari i'm still angry at you but thank you for this genius strategy

user335: today you are excused, tomorrow we go back to hating

user336: the north remembers

yourusername: never in doubt starboy - i love you, you deserve this so much

charles_leclerc: i love you more, this win is for you after everything we've been through

yourusername: you're too sweet - it's all you baby and the win is all yours, my prize is being. yours

charles_leclerc: so glad we could have all of our REAL family around us today

yourusername: i love you all ⸜(｡˃ ᵕ ˂ )⸝♡

oscarpiastri: i guess if there's anyone to lose to here, it would be my grid dad

francocolapinto: if you don't want the P2 i'll gladly take it off of your hands

yourusername: okay babies let's calm down and celebrate that we ALL scored points today

olliebearman: thanks mum and dad

pepemarti: did you guys see my F2 podium (๑>◡<๑)?

charles_leclerc: we did!

yourusername: well done pepe :3

pepemarti: hehehehehehheheheheehehehe

maxverstappen1: oh boy got out of ferrari jail and now we're ALL being subjected to the conjugal visits

charles_leclerc: stay outta my business

maxverstappen1: BROTHER 4 MILLION PEOPLE IN YOUR BUSINESS

yourusername: and four million people know my man is off limits

yourusername: @carlossainz55 stop paying instagram models to flirt with my man

charles_leclerc: @carlossainz55 what money are you using for this i had to close my DMs

user337: HE'S PAYING INSTAGRAM MODELS TO TRY AND FLIRT WITH CHARLES THE VERY GUY WHO HAD HIS CHILDHOOD RIVAL DELIVER LOVE LETTERS WHEN HIS PHONE WAS TAKEN ???

oscarpiastri: we never said carlos was smart

f1tea

liked by user339, user340 and 11,943 others

f1tea: the ramifications of the sainz civil war may be a lot worse than previously feared. carlos sainz does not have a seat for the 2025 f1 season and doesn't look like he'll be chosen for a reserve role either with bridges with red bull firmly burnt. however, one of the biggest effects of this 'war' has been on those who still choose to associate with carlos. it's been reported that mclaren have had to turn down a number of sponsors after they asked that it is only run on oscar's car and that lando norris is not seen with the brand. do you think we'll see lando jump ship from carlos or will mclaren become a safehaven for sainz?

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user341: mclaren? a safe haven for carlos sainz? the same mclaren that houses the first child of y/n and charles? i'd like to see them try

user342: finally the carlando PR spin is dead

user343: they way they both thought that was their ultimate get out of jail free card and now it's like incriminating

user344: isn't this all getting a little petty now? like y/n and charles are together and carlos doesn't have a seat? what's the point of keeping all of this drama going?

user345: tbf this 'drama' was never going away the moment they exposed themselves for trying to use their daughter/sister as bait to further carlos' career

user346: if that wasn't downright criminal then unlawfully suing your daughter/sister for everything she rightfully earnt WAS

user347: yeah just because 55 fans and the sainzs themselves want to bury that loss doesn't mean it's not like one of the first things that come up when. you google carlos - of course sponsors are not gonna want ANYTHING to do with that

user348: poor lando getting caught in the petty crossfire

user349: i mean he was shit slinging at y/n after austria and that girl has levels of voodoo only taylor swift can better

user350: he's also a grown man who has seen this all go down behind the scenes so he's made his bed and has to lie in it

user351: the way the sponsors are just piling up for charles as well karma really is doing a number right now

user352: his charm is so universal that oscar is becoming one of the most marketable drivers as well

user353: no but as someone who was on the ground at monza, it's BAD like people were wearing their sainz merch with the 55 or spanish flag covered up

user354: oh he got them acting like middle aged football fans it's BAD

user355: at least they haven't started burning stuff yet

user356: if he takes out charles i fear it won't take long

yourusername

liked by charles_leclerc, maxverstappen1 and 1,452,097 others

yourusername: my new poetry and letter collection, the alchemy, is out today and you guys already made it a new york times bestseller. my heart is so full! the last couple months made me feel like i would never get to love so thank you for showing me that everything is possible x

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user357: ma'am i am in love with you

user358: get in line buddy

charles_leclerc: i will run all of you over

maxverstappen1: thank you for the dedication, it was a traumatic time for us all

yourusername: you simply could've not read my private letters to my lover?

maxverstappen1: and where's the fun in that?

yourusername: a pigeon wouldn't have done this to me...

maxverstappen1: yeah well a pigeon also hasn't been your best friend for years and doesn't have a couch and cats to comfort you

yourusername: you make a good point

user359: she's really out here making me believe in love

charles_leclerc: the most talented woman in the world, i'm blessed to be on the receiving end of such words

yourusername: writing is so much easier with a muse like you

charles_leclerc: you're making me blush

user360: sure if my boyfriend was a greek god i'd also write good poetry

charles_leclerc: no you couldn't, not like her

yourusername: (˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶)

lewishamilton: congratulations y/n, what an achievement! however, i do think the real achievement here is getting this grid to read a book

georgerussell63: excuse me?

alexalbon: ... you got me but i wanted the tea ☕️

charles_leclerc: APPRECIATE THE POETRY PEOPLE

alexalbon: funny how the letters were back and forth... but none of yours made it to the book

yourusername: ALEX :(

charles_leclerc: i didn't want my sad ramblings to drag down her shine - i thought you would get that seeing how bad you are at golf compared to lily

lilymunhe: oop.

user361: where are the children

yourusername: eating my cake :(

maxverstappen1: they're actually being really cute and are all sat in a circle reading it (˵ •̀ ᴗ - ˵ ) ✧

charles_leclerc: gotta make sure they can read none of us finished school

f1

liked by landonorris, carlossainz55 and 2,309,450 others

tagged: maxverstappen1 & carlossainz55

f1: LAST LAP SHUNT! Carlos Sainz takes Max Verstappen out in baku and the two did not mince their words on the radio

view all comments

user363: not to be dramatic but that's lowkey attempted murder

user364: at this point carlos is trying to ACTUALLY recreate that list of crimes meme

user365: let's get his ass in JAIL then

oscarpiastri: if i speak i'm in big trouble

carlossainz55: speak it big man - if you wanna act like a big guy back it up

oscarpiastri: okay you are a narcissistic misogynist who can't bear being told no. you are a talented man but without your name you would be nowhere but you lack the selfawareness to be grateful for where you are which is why you don't have a job. you are reckless and dangerous and the very few friends you have will drop you when you no longer serve a purpose in f1

user366: oh shit babe came out swinging

oscarpiastri: i'm hearing a lot of CRICKETS?

oscarpiastri: exactly - pussy.

user367: thank you franco colapinto for bringing back drivers with zero media training

user368: once again i am asking for proximity chat in f1

user369: the sweet souls on twitter would NOT be able to handle it

yourusername: bro tried to assassinate my best friend but i'm the problem

carlossainz55: stop being so dramatic, if anyone was to purposely hurt someone it would be max - look where he came from

yourusername: first of all FUCK YOU

yourusername: second of all, max is stronger than you ever will be, how dare you try and use his childhood against him when you know he's nothing but a gentle soul

yourusername: thirdly, by this logic the reason i'm such a 'gold-digging back-stabbing whore' is because of YOU GUYS

user370: i am absolutely losing it at the fact that carlos is furiously typing these at the fia HQ

user371: i know his PR officer is TIRED

francocolapinto: sorry our uncle got sniped but we did also get points @olliebearman

olliebearman: JUST TO SAY WE WENT TO SEE MAX AND HE IS OKAY BUT YES THANK YOU FOR THE POINTS

yourusername: guys lets keep the inside thoughts inside

francocolapinto: so you're not proud of us (╹ -╹)?

yourusername: I AM, I AM, WE ARE (charles is on the podium he'll tell you later)

francocolapinto: ( ˶ˆ꒳ˆ˵ )

olliebearman: ( ˶ˆ꒳ˆ˵ )

maxverstappen1

liked by charles_leclerc, oscarpiastri and 1,387,300 others

tagged: yourusername

maxverstappen1: i lived bitch

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user372: they're gonna have to do a little more than that to take down the united front of hating

user373: 50g can't stop the grind for these dudes

maxverstappen1: i would call that man a bitch with my last breath

user374: them celebrating the end of carlos' career by doing a mukbang is killing me

user375: when the funeral food be good as fuck you be forgetting who died

carlossainz55: you guys really are so pathetic

maxverstappen1: i didn't try to pimp out my sister, make her homeless then sue her but that might just me be

maxverstappen1: also the data will prove what we all know btw

carlossainz55: that you're reckless just like your daddy?

maxverstappen1: at least i can admit my dad is an asshole and i distanced myself, your dad is just as much a bitch but you gotta parade him around because no one else can bear being around you

carlossainz55: the only bad thing my dad ever did in his life is help bring the spawn of satan into the world

maxverstappen1: whatever, enjoy your race ban bozo

user376: is max suggesting ... it was on purpose

user377: if it was carlos might just be as dumb as they all say because fool was about to get a podium

yourusername: THEY CAN'T GET RID OF US BITCH

maxverstappen1: you're a sick motherfucker if you're enjoying this sainz disasterclass well i only just got out of the medical centre 🤧🤧🤧

charles_leclerc: no but deadass we're sorry you got taken out

maxverstappen1: someone had to be the mercutio to you people's romeo and juliet

maxverstappen1: PLEASE DO NOT KILL YOURSELVES AFTER I'VE GONE THROUGH ALL THIS SHIT FOR YOU

yourusername: we can't leave you with all these kids

charles_leclerc: yeah that's a lot of kids to inherit

user378: christian horner i hate you but you gotta get on your zoom

oscarpiastri: where's my congratulations 🤨

maxverstappen1: @yourusername @charles_leclerc yeah you can keep your kids

charles_leclerc: we're proud of you oscar (don't beat me again)

yourusername: well done oscar (your verbal takedown was particularly impressive as well)

oscarpiastri: 🤭🤭🤭

fin

note: lol i'm back. i was busy with work and then in hospital. but we all love guilty as sin? will get to tagging soon one sec

[scekrex]

Consider chasing dick instead of pussy

prompt by @akiriyo

pairing: Adam x male!reader

warnings: language & implied sexual intimacy I guess

note: not beta read bc idc

You were completely zoned out, your hand was supporting your head so that it wouldn't slap down on the table.

It was yet another day of Adam complaining - seriously the guy was complaining more about his ex wives than you two were having a normal conversation about anything else. Because no matter what you were talking about, Adam somehow always found a way to talk about Lilith and Eve. And once started, his ranting could go on for hours, there were countless nights without sleep simply because the man wouldn't stop talking about his fucking cheating bitches of ex wives. And with every other sentence he then claimed that ‘he’s totally over it’ and that he doesn't need them anyways.

Fucking bullshit.

“Yo, are you even listening, bitch?” the first man asked all of a sudden, fingers snapping in front of your face to get your attention.

“You should've dated a fucking guy instead of these bitches, y’know. All fucking day you keep complaining about how awful they were, how they cheated on you with Lucifer, how they betrayed you and how you'll never be able to get into a healthy relationship with a woman ever again because of those two cunts. Well then fucking quit chasing after pussy and try dick, you fucking idiot.” In all honesty? You really didn't know where that came from nor were you sure if Adam had been able to understand you because of how fast you were talking but by God it felt good. 

Because for once there was silence. Pure, blissful silence.

“What?” was all that came from your counterpart. His golden eyes were widened, confusion was written all over his face and he seemed truly taken aback. You simply huffed, now that you had started it, you might've might as well finish it.

“Y’know all I hear from you lately is ‘That whore Lilith did this’ and ‘Fuckin cheating cunt Eve did that' fucking quit it already and date guys. If you would've looked at me back in Eden for once, just fucking once, you would've been able to save yourself a lot of trouble. But instead you were chasing bitches that were rather bouncing on fucking Lucifer's dick than yours.”

His expression changed, confusion was replaced with realization and you just thanked God that this man seemed to have enough of his brain left to catch on to what you were saying.

“Fuck, you-” the brunette started. He had sure been expecting something but this? This wasn't something he had been noticing, not until you brought it up that was. “You were visiting Eden because of me?”

“Ding, ding, full points. You want a fucking trophy for being able to follow my words?” you bit back, slightly annoyed by his oblivion. Had Adam really been that blind to not notice the ways you've been staring at him a little longer than friends did? That you were always there for him, no matter how late, no matter what?

Adam's expression soured slightly at your choice of words and he shot a quick “Fuck you” your way. “You could've just fucking said so y’know.” Another huff escaped you as you got up from the chair you were sitting on to be on eye level with him - Adam was still sitting on the chair across the small table. “I could've just said so? Are you kidding? I've been fucking trying to but every time I tried you brought up your ex whores.”

Adam was silent again, he did nothing but to simply look you in the eyes.

That was until he grabbed you by the collar of your robe and pulled you in roughly. You stumbled slightly forwards, your knees hitting against his as your arm shot towards the backrest of the chair Adam was sitting on in order to not collapse on top of him. And then his lips brushed against yours, harshly and firm, far from soft and lovingly. One of his hands wandered to your neck, he made sure you wouldn't pull away too soon. But you weren't thinking about ending the kiss, you had been waiting for thousands of years for this to happen.

Adam parted his legs to pull you in closer, your chest was now flush against his and his hand that had been gripping your collar just moments ago was now on your ass.

And all you were able to think about was that you now had an effective method to shut Adam up properly.

[sanjisboyfie]

shanks being your doting boyfriend

(slightly himbo) shanks x male reader

NOT PROOFREAD mb. small, slight manga spoilers??? sorry guys + LMFAO i hadto ctrl + f every single time i used "arms" and switch it to "arm" also im so soorrryyyy its kinda rlly short.....forgive me also idc???? if this seems ooc to me shanks is just a silly lil guy.

— oh god. the power you hold. you actually singlehandedly could change the course of the entire one piece universe if you wanted to. why??? because one of the four emperors of the sea follows everrything you say like a lost puppy. he hangs off of every word that leaves your lips with a dumb, lovesick grin on his face. his head is empty, just thoughts of you. good thing you use this power of yours for good and keep this man HUMBLE.

"[name], can you please tell your idiot boyfriend to just do the dishes, i can't-"

"beckkkkkk, why are you bothering me and my boyfriend's personal time together?" shanks whined, little spooning his way into your side. his stubble was scratching your skin, making you itchy around your neck and shoulder, especially with the way he was so aggressively nuzzling his head. "we haven't even woken up yet,"

"yeah, and you were supposed to be on cleaning duty last night and you instead chose to spend that time coddling [name], so look where we are now,"

"i'm the captain, goddammit! why do i have to do something like cleaning duty?"

"ask [name], he made that rule,"

shanks' aggressive demeanor turned into putty as he pouted at you. it was not a fitting expression for someone that had a reputation like his and also his age (too old to be acting like a kid).

"babbbbyyy, why are you making us spend less time together? is it because you hate me?"

"shanks, just go fucking do some cleaning in the kitchen. it's a shit show and it's pissing me and the chefs off. get a grip, babe," you scolded, pushing his pouting face away from your own.

with a look of hesitation, shanks finally backed off and got out of bed. as he was putting on a proper pair of trousers on, he was muttering about his own boyfriend was bullying him. his comments went ignored by both you and beck — who was watching with a look of disbelief on his face.

to see his best friend, captain, and one of the four emperors of the sea so easily swayed into doing chores was something he doesn't think he'd ever get used to. no matter how long you and shanks have been together, seeing the red head so obediently follow orders was infathomable.

— shanks -> really intimidating status as captain of the red hair pirates -> turns into complete mush when you walk into the room. without fail, he physically deflates into whatever seat he's sitting in and holds his arm out to you invitingly, waiting for you to sit on his lap.

shanks was supposed to be in serious mode. he was sitting in front of some pretty high ranked marine officials, who were after his crews' heads. he wasn't the type to hold hostages, just to let them go back running to their navy base, but considering the crew was on a vacation of sorts, he needed to know how they were able to track them down.

it lingered in his mind that there was a chance there was a mole in their ranks, but he didn't want to accept that as it would be a painful reality.

"so, how did you know we'd be at this island to recover?" shanks questioned, eyes glaring holes into the marines' faces. they were shaking where they sat, except for one who tried holding a tough demeanor. "i'm not going to do anything to you if you just answer my question,"

just as the marine was about to spill all their information out, the door of the room they were in was slammed open. shanks' haki faltered slightly as he was able to recognize that it was you, and with that imbalance, it sent the marine officers over the edge and made them pass out instead.

you took in the scene, bleakly apologizing for interuppting. shanks didn't have the heart to scold you, so instead he just took you into his arm with a wide grin and said, "no, no, it's alright. i was beginning to miss you anyway, doll. was wondering why you weren't with me," he pouted into your skin, making you laugh.

"turns out one of the lackeys you let on board recently was the reason why these guys showed up out of nowhere," you informed your lover, who hummed in interest, "took a while, but was able to get him to crack under pressure."

shanks sighed in content, hugging you even tighter, "i love you so much, you're so sexy when you take control,"

another laugh escaped your lips as you heard your boyfriend almost drunkenly sing you praises, "it was nothing, the guy had zero resolve anyway,"

"you're so amazing, baby," he continued complimenting into your skin, acting as if there weren't three passed out marine officers in front of you two.

a couple of the lackeys of the crew came bounding into the room and almost froze when they saw their intimidating captain cuddling into your side like an eager puppy.

"u-uhm, captain?" shanks only hummed in acknowledgement as he held you tight to his side. "what do you want us to do with these guys and that bastard traitor?"

"oh, just keep them tied up and then leave them on the shore when we depart — they probably won't survive with all the wildlife around here," shanks hummed, waving his hand dismissively. you were standing in between his legs and he was relishing in the skinship you were allowing him.

"should we tell the rest that we will be setting sail soon then?"

this time you interjected, "yeah, i'll come with you, boys. i'll make moving the bodies easier."

the crew's face lightened up at your familiar kind behavior, but then stiffened when they heard a groan coming from shanks.

"but [name]!! these guys got it, just stay with me longer, please,"

"oh, shut up, idiot. just go back to the main event and lift up the spirits of our crew, they probably wanna hear words from their captain after such a traitorous bastard infiltrated us,"

shanks sighed at your mini lecture, but dragged himself to follow your footsteps. he was holding onto your hand and his feet were practically stomping into the wood.

"who even made me captain, i never asked for this," he sighed, making the crew weakly laugh to fill the awkward silence while you just tried apologizing for your boyfriend, and captain's, idiotic behavior.

— shanks really cherishes the alone time he can spend with you. living your lives as highly wanted pirates makes your daily life hectic. and, thankfully, the foundations of your relationship only led to you two being able to keep that strong trust, respect, and love for each other so alive.

it was nighttime and the ship was rocking ever so slightly with the waves. for once, you switched cuddling positions and had your head resting on shanks' chest. your fingers were drawing mindless shapes on the exposed skin while shanks' arm was squeezing your plushy flesh every now and then.

"you know, i love you so much, right?" he confessed into the night air, the genuineness of his emotions being made obvious with how softly he spoke.

"i love you too," you easily said back, not thinking twice.

"but, do you know i love you?" shanks repeated, sitting up and holding onto your waist to make sure all your attention was directed on him, "i know our lives don't make our lifestyle easier and i know i get really busy when times get rough, but i needed to tell you again that i love you so much [name]."

you grinned at his sincerity, leaning forward and pressing a soft, gentle kiss to his chapped lips. he reciprocated in a second's notice, but you pulled away before he could deepen it (as he usually did whenever you two kissed).

"i know you love me shanks, you are the sweetest lover i can think of. your kindness and humanity remind me everyday that this life is worth living if it's with you," shanks smiled at your words, nudging his forehead against yours to entice you to pull in closer to him.

your lips locked once more in a passionate filled kiss. your bare chests were now skin to skin with one another and it took a couple minutes of desperate kissing for shanks to be satisfied.

and when you finally pulled away and settled back onto his chest, he squeezed you once more and asked, "you've had other lovers besides me?" in reference to what you said earlier.

cue an eyeroll and pinch to his sides to make him shut his pretty mouth for some needed peace and quiet.

[killuintense]

share Leon links idc audio and porn GIRL WE STARVING.

KSJFJSKFKSKDK MAAAAAN i always end up spoiling y'all with what u want!!

but well, i leave my favorite videos when i want to think about Leon... yk 🤨

TW: explicit sexual content, links of p0rn videos, sorry leon i love you but never is enough ‹𝟹

LINK 1 — this video IS SO Leon re2r coded, so kind and gentle kissing you all the time, sometimes the rhythm of his thrusts stumbles a little because he is holding back the urge to sink into you because he loves the warmth you give him when you squeeze around him. He kisses you, he adores you, he LOVES kissing you on the mouth, it doesn't matter if it's messy, he just wants your hot little mouth to contain him. However, in the end it is almost impossible for him and he ends up speeding up the penetrations because he just wants to cum and he can't stand another second without the feeling of your heat enveloping him while he cums in your tight pussy.

It's really my favorite video because physically the boy also looks a lot like Leon uwu !

LINK 2 LINK 3— only Leon eating pussy 🤨 we already know that he is a fan of doing it, he can't help it and when he is too fond of you and wants to push you away, he grabs you by the waist and makes you lean all your weight on his face because he LOVES IT, and not always It has to be when you are lying down, sometimes he just takes advantage of any moment to bury himself between your legs and eat you anywhere. he is so desperate.

LINK 4 — for some reason this reminds me of Leon re4r, he would be the quite vocal guy and always when it came time to cum he would moan like this. An interesting point is that he loves to fill you, fill you enough so that your pussy is not capable enough to contain it so that it escapes from the sides, staining you even more with his cum. He loves it and giggles mischievously about it. He's really a very stamina boy and even though he came, he keeps pushing inside you.

anyway, those are all the videos. i genuinely only like videos of this style if they remind me of Leon lmao, but if that's the case i go crazy and many of the one shots i write are probably inspired by one of these.

LINK 5— i kept this one because it gave me a lot of Leon vibes from death island, he looks big and i always had the fantasy of doing it with that version of him in doggy style, especially because i see this version of Leon as gentle but at the end of the situation he gets carried away by the desire to want to take you at his pace so he fucks you harder. Another detail is that i love how similar the video's hand is with Leon, did you see that scene in death island where we can see it well? His hands are... fuck, you know, the amount of things those fingers could do, and the video reminded me of it all the time!!

LINK 6 — no matter the version, we all know that Leon is a needy and desperate boy. i loved the detail of him asking to stop in that way so as not to cum yet, Leon would have that consideration but it's obvious that you wouldn't, pushing him to the limit so that he can cum and your baby can release all the tension he has on him. you laugh at him for being so pathetic, but you kiss him and while he tries to recover, your hands don't stop touching his cock because, let's be honest, we all know that it is only yours and you control it how you want.

if i find more videos, i will do another part, of courseeeee, as long as it is well received uwu

thanks for your message anon, ily'all ♡♡♡♡

[ayeshascorner]

Some of my controversial opinions, scroll and fuck off if your sensitive idc

-Daddy kinks aren't weird, if you find them weird then get off of Tumblr cuz ur ass is gonna have a hard life, or ur just young.

-The teacher/student concept with Tom is hot, the age gaps are too although there's a limit, but overall it shouldn't matter as long as the reader is at least at the adult age, idk I really don't care as long as the fic is good

-The usage of "y/n" makes my face contort nd makes me wanna actually fucking die sometimes (MY OPINION, it reminds me of those tiktok POVs 💀)

-Sw in fanfic is okay, I genuinely dont see a problem with it, supporting it is okay unless its romancing SA or r-word and promoting it in any way (Which it isn't so idk who's ass ppl pulled that out of, u gotta make bank some way) <3

-Rough sex in fanfics doesnt= non con (I think everyone knew this already just making sure cuz some bitches r dumb) (another edit: y’all this doesn’t mean that you can write straight up 🍇 or mentions of 🍇 in your fanfic cuz that just isn’t sane, there’s a damn limit)

-If yall want these toll bitches to go away PLEASE I fucking BEG PLEASE stop mentioning them cuz that motivates them, they are petty as fuck. (ion support toll y'all so dont start- cuz I WILL drag your ass if a get accusations 😻😻 I'm not a weird bitch!)

-When someone posts something u dont like, just scroll, no one actually cares about your comments unless its support, like genuinely shut the fuck up, ESPECIALLY if its at the fic writers, they are giving it to YOU not themselves.

-I feel like some of the ppl complaining about the kid problem on here are kids themselves, I mean.. I can tell some of y'all aren't 17+ nd thats fine unless yk what ur getting urself into..

-If your a little sensitive ass snowflake then Tumblr genuinely isn't the place for you (I've said this multiple times nd ill repeat myself even more)

-"He's a full-grown man with a wife!" Shut ur dumbass up, stupidass hoes mad asf over small shit, like okay and? Ya' think were actually gonna fuck him?💀💀

-"🍇 isn't 🍇 if you like it" Your sick, shut the fuck up.

-"G-Guys I dont like the smut😖" Stfu and get off Tumblr.. Its obviously not the place for you 💋

-Last but not least...💀

Lets not do this, its genuinely stupid...Like why are we comparing races over a man who doesn't even know who we r? Be so fr.. Gtfo my asks if ur gonna say this 💋

[kanasbinwriting]

Hello!! Do you think you could do "a date with death" headcannons?? Like just general romantic headcannons!

GENERAL DATING HEADCANONS

Thank you so much for your request!! Apologies for the long wait :( I was quite busy recently.

I love him so much I might even do a part two if I can come up with more after I finish all of my requests...

I listened to the adwd soundtracks as I wrote this lol. Idk and idc if someone cares or not, but my Casper plush arrives soon and I'm sooo excited ^^!! Anyway, enjoy!!

┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈

- He looks like someone who adores kisses but wouldn't initiate them at first, so you'd have to make the first move

- But don't worry, if you stop giving him kisses and tease him enough he'll be the one to initiate them

- He gets especially weak in the knees when you kiss him on the neck

- Do you guys know that meme "Ah, yes. My girlfriend and her 500 dollar four foot tall mareep."? That's Casper with his Azrael plush and I will die on that hill

- He will laugh at you if you get jealous of his plush

- How can you be jealous of a plushy...? Mortals sure are weird...

- In the beginning stages of your relationship, he would be very shy and uncertain when it comes to initiating physical touch, but when you initiate it? He would never say no

- He loves to tease you but will explode when you tease him back

- No matter how often he denies it, it's obvious that he loves your teasing and adores the little back and forth you guys have

- You don't know how makeup works? Don't worry, because your personal makeup assistant is here!

- He would LOVE to do your makeup whenever you please, may it be every day or just on special occasions it doesn't matter to him. He also loves to have you this close to him and cups your cheek when he does your eyeliner

- Don't get me wrong, I bet he's a great cook, but I don't think he knows a lot of recipes and will make the same things over and over again

- If you want to eat something different, feel free to join him. I think cooking would be one of his favourite activities with you

- If you're a picky eater, he will make sure to only add the things you like

- His baking is shit though, no matter how precisely he follows the recipe, he somehow always fucks it up

- Even though he gets easily flustered, I think you two moved on quite fast in the relationship

- He would love to include you in his nightly routine

- Your skin's going to look glamorous!

- Even if you don't want to use his products for whatever reason, he'd still enjoy having you next to him doing your stuff as he gets ready for bed

- Even with Azrael in his arms, he still wouldn't be able to fall asleep without you. So when you get home late expect a grumpy reaper waiting for you on your bed

- He'll immediately forgive you when you give him cuddles

- I think one of his love languages is physical touch

- He isn't too keen on PDA, but he'll still hold your hand and give you small kisses in public

- In private he's a big cuddle bug though

- I think he would enjoy being the little spoon and big spoon, you can take your pick. He would also enjoy every cuddle position where he can hold your hand and look at your face

- One of his other love languages is definitely words of affirmation

- He enjoys receiving it as much as giving it

- I don't think that gift-giving is his love language, but he'll still give you gifts from time to time to surprise you

- Okay, I think I should stop talking about his love languages, but let me drop one more.

- I definitely think that one of his love languages is quality time

- Be it going outside for a walk or just staying at home cuddling while watching one of your silly series, he will always want to spend his time with you

-  He seems like a morning person to me, but he also enjoys staying in bed with you cuddling

- He's a GREAT listener

- No matter the subject, he will always engage in it and ask questions about it

- He loves listening to you info dump

- He'll even check the things you like out so he can engage in the conversation more

- I like to think that he enjoys playing coop games with you... especially Cult of the Lamb :)

- He's quite tidy and keeps his things organised, but he still wouldn't want to clean after you

- So if you leave your dirty laundry on the floor, be prepared for a big lecture

- When it comes to arguments, I think his reaction depends on what kind of argument it is

- Are you arguing about something silly? He will act stubborn and be a little know-it-all, even if he knows he's in the wrong

- If it's a more serious argument he will raise his voice, but won't scream

- It'll take him a day to cool off, and it will be a bit hard for him to apologise first but he still manages

- He will feel a bit awkward at first when everything's sorted out

- Just tell him that everything's fine now and give him a little smooch and he will be back on track

- Tbh I don't think that he's a jealous type, he trusts you a lot

- He does get jealous though when you somehow manage to spend more time with someone other than him

- I think he would immediately seek you out and talk to you, embarrassingly admitting that he's jealous

- If you have any hobbies and/or a fan of certain things, be prepared to suddenly have tons of merch and/or stuff of it on your bed waiting for you

- He'd look at you with a smug smile waiting to be praised and praises he will receive

- If you have any trauma and are mentally ill, he will do his best to support your every need

- If you have sudden outbursts and want to be left alone, he wouldn't mind going to a different room and wait for you to calm down. He'll still feel bad for leaving you

- He needs a lot of reassurance when it comes to your mental health and what exactly you need him to do

- The same goes for when you're chronically ill

- He won't bother to look the information up, he knows that not every method applies to the same person and will just straight up ask you what you need

- When he's sad, all he wants is for you to hold him and tell him that everything's going to be alright

- If you're stressed due to work or an entirely different reason, be prepared to get spoiled by him. Of course, he would lecture first that you need to take better care of yourself, but he will immediately massage your head after

- He will tear up if you give him a gift and bake/buy him a cake on his birthday

- If you have a hobby that he can somehow participate in be ready to have a player two, because he will join you

- He likes it when you call him baby girl. Even when it confused him at first

- He loves it when you give him serious and silly pet names, he isn't picky

- He knows that marriage is a big thing for most mortals, so he would love to marry you. It doesn't matter if it's official or not

[kylelovskii]

the real question is Kyle more or less of a lil shit once he gets the girl? like you can't tell me that boy doesn't own a remote controlled vibe... -mk anon

this request is so old but IDC!!!!

and he does. 100%.

i wrote this half asleep so im sorry if it sucks and if there’s errors

“cmon, pretty thing. just once? i promise i won’t use it much, and if i do, i won’t turn it up so high.”

liar. fucking liar.

kyle had sweet talked you into putting a vibrator inside yourself, then going to a party with all of the guys. he promised he wouldn’t turn it on very much, he just wanted to test it out, and you believed him, which is why you let him. but you were so, so wrong.

—

there you stood, talking with wendy and bebe. everything was going perfect, and you really thought kyle had just forgotten about it, but then you felt the slightest sensation between your legs go to not so slight.

your hand flew to your mouth, which caused wendy to stop mid sentence and look at you. “hey, are you okay? you look like you’re about to be sick,” she asked. you nodded frantically. “yeah—yes! ah— i just— um..got a sharp..c—cramp in my stomach. i’m gonna go to the bathroom,” you replied before rushing off, trying not to let whines and whimpers escape from your mouth.

you rounded a corner into a hallway where, thankfully, no one was. you sighed loudly, sinking down to the floor. “oh god, kyle— stop, stop, stop…”

“what’s that? stop what?” you heard a voice come from down the hall. you snapped your head into the direction of the noise.

there kyle stood, his hands into the pockets of his grey sweatpants and his glasses perched upon his nose. you looked him up and down, noticing how his white wife beater hugged his waist perfectly.

“you— you said you wouldn’t do it much. and that if you did— it wouldn’t be so high!” you said, not even bothering to stand up and go to him. instead, he came to you and knelt down, taking your chin in his hand. “oh, i guess i tricked you. poor girl.”

then he grabbed your hand and pulled you up. “why don’t we go back to the party, huh? i think our friends miss us. i don’t think it would be very polite to abandon everyone just so i could toy with you,” he said as he led you back to the group he was originally with. as you walked, the vibrations slowly came to a halt. when it stopped, you sighed in relief.

kyle held your hand as he spoke with cartman, the two of them bantering while kenny and stan just listened, laughing at the smart remarks that came out of one of the others mouth. you listened as well, letting out a giggle or two, but then kyle turned the toy to its highest setting.

your knees almost buckled underneath you, and you let out an audible gasp which turned into a whine. “oh, honey, what’s the matter?” kyle asked, rushing to your aid. you gave him a look, then lied and said, “my stomach hurts, kyle.”

everyone looked at the two of you confused, but then kyle excused the both of you so he could 'help you'.

he dragged you into a bathroom, locked the door, then picked you up and set you on the counter. he forced your legs open, then moved your panties to the side to look at your glittering cunt.

your skirt bunched up at your stomach as he kneeled between your legs. he didn’t do anything, he just looked up at you and dirty talked you.

“see? look at you. you’re such a good girl, but i bet you’d rather me do this in front of all our friends. especially cartman, huh? that right, doll?” you shook your head quickly, telling him no.

“awh, baby don’t deny it. you may be a good girl for me, but that doesn’t change the fact that you’re a little slut, right?” you shook your head again, whining and squirming, trying to close your legs. “no— nonono!”

“come on, take it for me. i know you can. be a good whore and take it. quit tryin' to close your legs,” kyle said, keeping your legs open with both his hands.

“please— i..oh god—” you groaned before your orgasm washed over you, your legs twitching and your hands flying to kyle’s hair.

as you came down from your high, you heard kyle speak, “wow that was quick. good job, baby. come on, i’ll clean you up and get that thing outta you,” he told you, helping you off the counter, then sitting you down on the toilet seat and running the water in the sink.

[restinslices]

Yo, still waiting for that if Tomas was a sub one (canon tbh)

Cannot believe I forgot. Y’all can boo me

Imma just come out and say it. He's such a whiny sub

There are characters that give me dom vibes but I think them as subs would be fun. There are characters that give me switch vibes. Tomas gives me only sub vibes. I don't detect a dom in there. idk, that's just me tho

So needy and whiny it'd probably throw you off when you see him doing anything other than begging you to touch him 

Cannot handle teasing at all. He's ok with teasing you but breaks easily when you tease him 

Honestly he can't backup any of the shit he talks. 

One of those subs who need attention at all times. Even if you're not interacting with him, he still wants you in the area 

Kinks I think he'd have are barebacking, biting, humiliation (a HUGE one and imma stand on it), breath play, collaring (in private), impact play, sex toys and sensory deprivation 

I just feel like he's a slut in disguise. Where's my proof? I made it the fuck up. I'm doing this for US 

If you have female anatomy he's also getting pegged. IDC IDC 

Humiliation is a big one for him because he knows it's still a safe space. You can taunt him about how he's a slut, write things on him, make him get off with something unusual, ect. but at the end of day you still love him and it's all for fun. 

You can tell when he's needy ‘cause he's extremely close to you. He follows you around normally, but he's right on your heels 

To torture him more you can pretend you have no idea what he wants. He knows you know and you know he knows, but watching him try to ignore how he feels ‘cause he doesn't wanna say it out loud is priceless. 

He also has a tendency to say he can't take anymore but in reality he wants you to keep going. This is a big guy, he can take it. 

There's two good punishments for him; Cockwarming and overstimulation 

Cockwarming because he can't handle teasing. It's so simple but he can't stand it and doesn't know which is worse; when you're inside of him (actual dick or strapon, doesn't matter) or when he's inside of you. Either way, it doesn't take long for him to apologize for whatever he's done and beg you to fuck him already. 

For overstimulation he gets turned on and cums pretty easily so it wouldn't take that much to overstimulate him. 

These two go well together. Cockwarming then overstimulation as a “isn't this what you wanted?”

What would make this better is quizzing him on something. His brain stops working when he's horny so quizzing him on Lin Kuei principles or something else he for sure knows adds to it. 

He knows he knows the answer but his brain is a fog. It kinda puts the punishment in his hands but that adds to the torture. If he could figure this out, then you'd actually fuck him (or you'd stop fucking him if you do this while overstimulating him)

As I'm typing this I thought of another thing that can be both a punishment but also something he enjoys. Dryhumping. Listen to me and listen to me well-

I can see him coming up behind you when you're alone and rubbing against you to let you know he's needy. And if you told him to keep going, he'd cum but it's not what he really wants to do. 

So him being in trouble and being forced to rub against you but not be inside you or have you inside him would drive him nuts. 

Aftercare for him would be showering together, cuddling and reassuring him you didn't mean any of the negative things you said. Especially after an intense punishment, he needs to hear you don't actually think negatively of him and you love him. 

Also reading together depending on the day. Just something really chill to pull him back to reality. 

I just realized he has the least amount of words so here are afterthoughts to fix that

I know I've called him whiny multiple times but I genuinely think sometimes he can't even form coherent sentences. All that comes out are noises 

Tries not to pout but does so anyway 

He can get off just from giving head 

Loves you leaving marks on him as long as he can cover it up. He can't be scrapping and the enemy sees a hickey on his neck

Tries to sneakily break rules. For example, if a rule is “no touching yourself when I'm gone” he'll do it anyway and try to get rid of the evidence. He'll shower, change clothes, clean any toy he used and whatever else he has to do but you somehow always know. 

Tomas is not the best liar and has some habits he does when lying, like tapping his fingertips together so you find out that way or from actually catching him and pretending you didn’t

The type to break rules on purpose if you haven't been giving him attention and then be surprised when actions have consequences 

Will call you whatever title you prefer if you don't just wanna go by your name

Like his brothers, he for sure could just throw you off but he never does. It adds to the fun. He's a skilled assassin but if you said “jump” he'd ask “how high?”

The best sub to have if you want one whos so pathetically in love with you but can be a little shit sometimes 

Even after his punishments, he keeps apologizing to make sure you're not actually mad at him. 

Probably begs you to cum inside him anyway you can

I see him and start tweaking fr

[de4dlyniightshade]

You got any slutty Raymond hcs mama???

so many. so so many.

sub. bite me idc.

blowjob LOVER like every man likes a bj ofc but he LOVESSSSSSSSSSS bjs bcs he gets to just put his brain in your mouth and not have to think for however long he can last(not long let's be real here)

clumsy like very clumsy sex bcs he doesn't know what he's doing but he puts his heart and soul into bless him he really tries but 9/10 times it ends with you on top fucking his brains out and using him to get yourself off.

munch!!!!!!!!! not great at it but munch!!!!!!!!!! he really does try and that's all that matters until he's accidentally edging you and you just have to grab his hair and fuck his face.

biggest himbo ever, outside the bedroom and inside, has no idea what anything means, what positions are called, names for kinks, nothing, he just likes what he likes and let's you do what you want with a dopey smile on his face.

super needy like no matter where you are if he's feeling a little frisky you're gonna know abt it and he'll make sure of it, wether he's straight up telling you or not-so-subtly pressing his cock into you.

sensitive! like super super sensitive, can't handle overstimulation whatsoever, he's immediately crying and gasping and squirming away from you.

we all know he's an ass guy ofc but like he's an ASS guy like he loves eating you from the back so he can grip your ass and even bite your buttcheek when you don't expect it bcs you never let him.

on the same lines, loves grinding on your ass, even when you're both clothed, the feeling of his cock slotting perfectly between your ass just tickles his brain just right and will make him cum embarrassingly fast.

tongue. all the time. will have his tongue in your mouth any time you kiss, he just can't help it. and licking you, sexually or not he just loves licking you.

loves when you choke him with his ascot.

the ascot stays on.

i love his ascots.

backshots with you pulled against his chest.

suuuuuppppppppeeeerrrrrrr vocal like crazy loud, so much so that more often than not you have to cover his mouth just so you don't get complaints.

will let you peg him.

loves a curvy gal. and has no shame about it. will shout it from the rooftops.

[pharahsgf]

idc if twitter gets deleted tomorrow but the fact that one of the most important and widely used social media sites on the planet is on life support because some dumb asshole has too much money to ever be told 'no' is so dystopian. like it doesn't even matter how universal and culturally entrenched something is, if a rich guy with zero common sense wants to fuck with it then he can easily do so

[electronicseafish]

Which colour of jewelry would suit them best - twst characters

Heartslabyul Riddle Rosehearts - Both gold and silver would fit him BUT gold would look slightly better on him Trey Clover - gold (silver washes him out so badly its not funny) Cater Diamond - unironically he looks better in silver but always wears gold Ace Trappola - he is aware he looks better in silver how? his brother likes wearing rings Deuce Spade - another silver guy im sorry i cannot imagine him in gold Savanaclaw

Leona Kingscholar - gold. whenever he wears silver jewelry cannot even see it Jack Howl - silver guy which is funny cause I thought he was a really weird werewolf at first Ruggie Bucchi - my guy looks best in gold but all he has is silver Octavinelle Azul Ashengrotto - it's obviously silver Floyd Leech - tbh im conflicted between tweels cause I feel like they both have faces for silver but Floyd wears gold Jade Leech - always wears silver you will never catch his wearing any jewerly that Floyd owns Scarabia Jamil Viper - he wears gold but looks good in silver just never wears it Kalim Al-Asim - has never wore silver jewelry Pomefiore Vil Schoenheit - he wears both types but looks slightly better in gold Epel Felmier - Whenever he wears golden jewerly it lowkey looks like he's sick Rook Hunt - gold guy only Ignihyde 

Idia Shroud - somehow gold makes him look even more dead (it doesn't bring his eyes at all they are already fuck ass radioactive yellow why the fuck would u give him golden jewerly to bring his eyes more trust me we can see them) Ortho Shroud - same as Idia tho he did try to wear golden jewerly to get that experience Diasmonia Malleus Draconia - unsuprisingly he is a silver guy Lillia Vanrouge - he exclusively wear gold purely because it makes him look kinda weird and to subtly fuck with people Silver - He looks ethereal whether he wears gold or silver it truly doesn't matter Sebek Zigvolt - gold he is pure gold guy trust me he would look great with gold earrings and such Night Raven College Staff Dire Crowley - I think this is canon based on his design that he wears gold and looks good in gold Divus Crewel - wears silver to keep his black nd white theme looks better in gold lol Mozus Trein - gold man same with Lucius he's also gold guy Ashton Vargas - pure gold nothing else Sam - I think he has gold earrings in his design but in my mind he wears silver idc Extras that don't fit in any categories but I wanted to include them anyway Dawn Knight - he has the same sytuation as Silver where both type of jewerly fits him regardles wears only silver (lol) Henrick Istovan - same sytuation as Dawn knight but wears only gold (yes even during war) Maleanor Draconia - canonically has in her design shit ton of silver stuff so what can I say other than silver? Baur Zigvolt - those gold genes are strong Dylla Spade - silver self explanatory Cheka - his design has so much warm colours putting him in any sort of silver jewerly would be a crime Che'nya - that fucked up gold that looks like silver but is gold but is silver (he looks decent with both so he just decided to take the middle colour) Neige LeBlanche - very clearly gold looks way better on him but silver doesn't wash him out Najma Viper - I feel like she would have a short lived phase where she try to make silver work with her for few months but eventually accepted her fate as only gold person Rollo Flamme - I feel like he would never wear jewerly but silvers looks good on him Ernesto Foulworth/Fellow Honest - gold just gold Gidel - suprsingly silver tho he looks decent in gold Skully - if that guy ever wears gold hell with break on twisted wonderland land and