#IVF Procees

[nimaayaivf]

IVF Treatment: A Comprehensive Guide to Process, Benefits, Factors, and Success Rates

What is IVF?

In recent years, In Vitro Fertilization (IVF) has emerged as a revolutionary medical procedure that has provided hope and assistance to couples struggling with infertility. This comprehensive guide aims to delve into the IVF treatment process, its benefits, key factors to consider, and success rates. Additionally, we will highlight the Nimaaya IVF Center in Surat as one of the best IVF centers, showcasing its expertise and commitment to helping couples achieve their dream of parenthood.

IVF Treatment Process

The IVF treatment process involves a series of steps that assist couples in achieving a successful pregnancy. While specifics may vary based on individual circumstances, the general process typically includes:

1. Ovulation Induction:

This phase involves the administration of fertility medications to stimulate the ovaries and encourage the production of multiple eggs.

2. Egg Retrieval:

Once the eggs are mature, a minor surgical procedure is performed to retrieve the eggs from the ovaries using a thin needle. This is usually done under sedation or light anesthesia.

3. Sperm Collection:

On the same day as egg retrieval, a sperm sample is collected from the male partner. In cases of male infertility, donor sperm can also be used.

4. Fertilization:

The retrieved eggs and sperm are combined in a controlled laboratory environment for fertilization. This can be done through traditional IVF or Intracytoplasmic Sperm Injection (ICSI), where a single sperm is injected directly into an egg.

5. Embryo Culture:

The fertilized eggs, now embryos, are cultured in a specialized incubator for a few days. During this time, their development is closely monitored.

6. Embryo Transfer:

One or more healthy embryos are selected for transfer into the woman's uterus. This is a relatively simple procedure that doesn't require anesthesia.

7. Luteal Phase Support:

Hormonal medications are prescribed to support the uterine lining and increase the chances of embryo implantation.

8. Pregnancy Test:

About 10-14 days after the embryo transfer, a blood test is performed to determine if pregnancy has been achieved.

Benefits of IVF Treatment

Overcoming Infertility:

IVF offers a ray of hope to couples who face challenges conceiving naturally due to various reasons, including blocked fallopian tubes, endometriosis, male factor infertility, or unexplained infertility.

Genetic Testing:

Preimplantation Genetic Testing (PGT) allows for the screening of embryos for genetic disorders before transfer, reducing the risk of passing on certain conditions to the child.

Age-related Infertility:

IVF can be particularly effective for older women who experience a decline in fertility due to age-related factors.

Male Infertility:

Couples dealing with male infertility issues can benefit from IVF by utilizing ICSI, where even a single viable sperm can lead to successful fertilization.

Same-sex Couples and Single Parents:

IVF provides a viable path to parenthood for same-sex couples and single individuals who wish to have children genetically related to one or both partners.

Key Factors to Consider

Medical Evaluation:

Thorough medical assessments of both partners are crucial to understand the underlying causes of infertility and determine the most suitable treatment approach.

Selecting the Right Clinic:

Choosing a reputable IVF center with experienced fertility specialists, advanced technology, and a supportive environment significantly impacts the success of the treatment.

Emotional and Psychological Well-being:

IVF can be emotionally challenging. It's important for couples to have a strong support system and consider counseling or therapy if needed.

Financial Considerations:

IVF treatment can be costly, and understanding the financial implications, insurance coverage, and available payment options is essential.

Success Rates of IVF

The success of IVF varies based on factors such as the woman's age, underlying infertility causes, the quality of eggs and sperm, and the expertise of the fertility clinic. Generally, younger women have higher success rates compared to older ones. Success rates are often reported as live birth rates per cycle.

Nimaaya IVF Center in Surat: A Beacon of Hope

Nimaaya IVF Center in Surat stands out as a leading fertility clinic dedicated to providing compassionate care and cutting-edge reproductive technologies. With a team of highly skilled fertility specialists, embryologists, and support staff, Nimaaya offers a comprehensive range of fertility treatments, including IVF. The center prides itself on personalized treatment plans tailored to each couple's unique needs.

Conclusion

In Vitro Fertilization has revolutionized the world of reproductive medicine, offering hope to couples struggling with infertility. The process, benefits, key considerations, and success rates discussed in this guide provide a comprehensive overview of IVF.

Nimaaya IVF Center in Surat exemplifies the commitment of fertility clinics to helping couples achieve their dreams of parenthood through advanced medical techniques and unwavering support. Remember that while IVF presents a remarkable opportunity, it's essential to make informed decisions based on thorough research, consultations, and a holistic understanding of the journey ahead.

Nimaaya - IVF Center in Surat

Address: Opp OLD RTO , Ring Road, Surat, Gujarat 395001

Mobile No.: 0261 611 9900

[kdyq]

The start of a new beginning

Ambessa x Fem!reader

Part one of a my mini series

Context : As Ambessa steps into a new role one of fierce protector and tender caretaker. While navigating the delicate early days of potential pregnancy with the help of Hextech IVF.

The lab was quiet except for the soft hum of Hextech crystals glowing faintly along the walls. Piltover’s finest alchemist stood before you a meticulous mixture of science and magic in his hands. Within the small vial he carried was the culmination of countless discussions, hopes, and dreams shared between you and Ambessa a mixture of your genetic material prepared for implantation through the marvel of Hextech fertility.

Ambessa stood beside you her imposing figure like a fortress of strength. Her golden eyes usually so sharp and calculating flickered with an emotion she rarely allowed herself to show… hope. “This is it” you said your voice quiet but steady as you reached for her hand.

She took your smaller hand in hers, her touch surprisingly gentle. “This is the beginning of something greater than either of us.”You smiled up at her warmth spreading through your chest. “You sound more optimistic than I expected.”

Her lips quirked in a rare soft smile. “Let’s call it confidence. We’ve fought for this and Medardas don’t lose battles.”The alchemist cleared his throat reminding you both that this moment was more than just words. “Shall we proceed?”

You nodded and Ambessa gave your hand one final squeeze before releasing it. “I’ll be right here”she promised her deep voice grounding you.

The process was not painful but it was deeply intimate. Lying on the sterile table you felt a strange mix of vulnerability and strength. The alchemist worked with precision the glowing Hextech apparatus buzzing faintly as it did its work.

Ambessa sat by your side her chair pulled close. She had insisted on being present for every second refusing to leave your side even for a moment. Her large hand rested on yours her thumb tracing soothing patterns across your skin. “Does it hurt?” she asked her voice uncharacteristically soft.

“Not really” you replied glancing up at her. “It’s just… strange. Knowing this could change everything.” “It will change everything” she said firmly her golden eyes locking onto yours. “And I’ll be here for every step of it.”

The procedure concluded without complication. The alchemist stepped back his expression one of professional satisfaction. “The implantation is complete. Now we wait for confirmation.” “How long?” Ambessa asked her tone calm but commanding.

“Two weeks” the alchemist replied. “ I’ll provide instructions to ensure the process is as smooth as possible. Minimal stress plenty of rest and careful monitoring.”Ambessa’s jaw tightened slightly but she nodded. “Understood.”You knew from that point own you wouldn’t lift a single finger until that conformation.

From the moment you left the clinic Ambessa transformed into a one woman security detail. She insisted on carrying you into the estate despite your protests.

“I’m perfectly capable of walking!” you said laughing as she scooped you up effortlessly.“Humor me” she replied her voice tinged with rare amusement. “You heard the alchemist minimal stress. I don’t take chances.”

Over the next few days her overprotectiveness became both endearing and slightly irritating . She refused to let you lift a finger but you know this is a love language for her she just doesn’t wanna tell you that. She’ll be reorganizing your usual routines with military precision.

“Ambessa I can pour my own tea” you said one morning as she carefully placed a steaming cup in front of you.“Not while I’m here” she countered her tone leaving no room for argument.

“oh my god your gonna drive me crazy” you teased though the warmth in your voice betrayed how much you appreciated her care.She leaned down her golden eyes locking onto yours. “Good. It means you’ll stay put.”

One evening as the two of you sat in the estate’s sprawling garden you finally managed to coax her into relaxing. The stars above were bright and the soft hum of the estate’s wards created a comforting background noise.

“You’ve been hovering “you said, leaning your head against her shoulder.“And?” she replied her smirk audible in her voice.

You laughed softly. “And I love you for it. But you don’t have to treat me like I’m fragile.”Ambessa shifted slightly, turning to face you. Her large hands cradled yours, the contrast between your smaller fingers and hers a reminder of her strength.

“You’re not fragile,” she said, her voice low and serious. “But this…. this life we’re creating…. it’s the most important thing I’ve ever done. And I won’t take any risks with it or with you.”The intensity in her gaze left you momentarily speechless. You reached up, cupping her cheek and she leaned into your touch.

“I know love” you said softly. “But you don’t have to carry it all on your own. We’re in this together.”Her expression softened and she pressed a kiss to your forehead. “You’ve always been better at balancing strength with softness. Maybe I could learn from you.”

As the two weeks stretched on your interactions grew even more intimate. Ambessa was a constant presence her protective instincts balanced by moments of vulnerability she rarely showed anyone else.

One afternoon she found you curled up in the library flipping through a book of baby names.“Already planning?” she asked her tone light as she sat beside you.“Just… imagining,” you replied, leaning against her. “Do you have any preferences?”

She took the book from your hands, flipping through it thoughtfully. “Something strong. Something that carries weight.”You smiled. “That’s very you.”

She looked down at you, her golden eyes warm. “And something that honors you.”The day of the follow up appointment arrived and Ambessa’s usual composure was replaced by a quiet tension. She held your hand tightly as you both awaited the results.When the alchemist finally returned holding the glowing test tube that signaled success, you felt tears well in your eyes.

“It worked”he said simply his voice filled with warmth. “Congratulations.”You turned to Ambessa your heart full. She stared at the test tube for a long moment before pulling you into her arms.

“You’ve done it” she whispered, her voice thick with emotion. “We’ve done it.”In that moment, surrounded by her strength and love you knew that this child would be born into a world shaped by both power and tenderness a legacy built on the unshakable bond you shared.

“THE END”

AN/ This took me so long to jus think about how im gonna do this whole story but im just about done with the part 4 ish I just wanted to have all or most of this mini series done so it wont be a long time between each “chapter”. Next one shot is Ambessa and then Sevika 🥸

[listen-to-the-inner-walrus]

[Alternate Text:

Alabama supreme court rules frozen embryos are ‘children’

Court allows two wrongful death suits against fertility clinic to proceed while decision could impact people seeking IVF.]

absolutely horrifying news coming out of alabama.

the whole article is a terrifying but worthwhile read, but i wanna highlight two passages from it which are just absolutely fucking horrifying.

[Alternate Text:

Alabama supreme court justice Jay Mitchell wrote that embryos are indeed protected under the state’s existing law: “The central question presented in these consolidated appeals, which involve the death of embryos kept in a cryogenic nursery, is whether the act contains an unwritten exception to that rule for extrauterine children – that is, unborn children who are located outside of a biological uterus at the time they are killed,” he wrote. “Under existing black-letter law, the answer to that question is no: the Wrongful Death of a Minor Act applies to all unborn children, regardless of their location.”]

[Alternate Text:

The Alabama supreme court’s ruling repeatedly references God and the sanctity of life, citing the Bible and biblical scholars including Petrus van Mastricht, Thomas Aquinas and John Calvin. Chief Justice Thomas Parker wrote: “Human life cannot be wrongfully destroyed without incurring the wrath of a holy God, who views the destruction of His image as an affront to Himself … this is true of unborn human life no less than it is of all other human life – that even before birth, all human beings bear the image of God, and their lives cannot be destroyed without effacing his glory.”]

[dbandbanart]

I absolutely love William I’m gonna cry-! He’s like just a little guy!!! Out of curiousity, are you still on board with the gene splicing concept? My thought is that it’s more like a Sweet Tooth situation where the little guy grew up in an incubator of sorts which can be super cute in a way.

Besides this, I kinda want to see William with his Aunt Franziska drawn someday since you mentioned it several times already. Probably something about how to use a whip which his parents would absolutely be concerned about. Just; “Hey! Papas! Guess what Aunt Franziska taught me today! *WHAP*” Probably was a habit squandered quickly though.

I also like the thought that he picked up a sort of “Hey don’t touch/go that/there! Proceeds to touch/go that/there himself” from his aunt too.

ohhh, thank you so much for your message! that's very sweet and I'm so happy!

I don't know exactly how the lawyer daddies got this baby. He could have been adopted, or it could have been an IVF procedure. Maybe one of the characters could be a trans person. All these things are possible, and everyone can go with whatever theory they want.

Heh, I actually tried to draw Franziska with her nephew hehehe. I would do it more often, but I'm just afraid to draw other characters because I'm not sure if my design is good for them. What about an adult version of Trucy? I'll definitely work on that)

Yes, Franziska was a wonderful aunt. And I'm pretty sure all of her brother's children would be perfectly capable of using the whip. But Kay could also teach them how to break handcuffs.)

[it-was-too-cold-always]

Always Read the Fine Print Chapter 3

Chapter 1 Chapter 2

Who actually reads all the terms and conditions? After mindlessly checking a box years ago, our Reader unintentionally agrees to be part of a scientific study to create super soldier babies. To make matters worse, her fellow test subject is the brooding and intimidating Bucky Barnes.

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader

Summary: As the Reader processes her role in this experiment, Bucky becomes more and more intrigued with her. He decides that his pardon is not worth her life, consequences be damned.

Warnings: arranged marriage, forced proximity, eventual smut, lots of angst

As soon as you left the room, Bucky let out a long, exasperated sigh. Fuck this, he thought, it’s not worth it. Bucky knew when he sought pardon for all his crimes as the Winter Soldier, it came with a price to pay. He knew they were going to run tests to try to recreate the serum. Granted, Bucky never thought they’d try to create super soldiers quite like this, which sent him into a blind rage. Hence why he’s on thin ice with SHIELD – turns out they don’t like it when you beat the shit out of their agents. But his rage was justifiable. Mandatory baby making? Talk about throwing consent out the window. He’s done enough harm as the Winter Soldier – making a woman to have sex with him so she can carry his child sounds like the opposite of making amends. So he decided that the only way he could morally proceed with the study is if he marries her; he can’t let her feel the cold and empty life of being a science experiment. With this new plan, he was able to swallow the idea of the study. But when he saw the dazed look on your face, the shock and fear settling into your eyes, he decided his pardon wasn’t worth it. He’d rather be locked in a cell for the rest of his days than subject you to this study…and to him.

You, on the other hand, were still in complete shock. A string of ‘holy shit’s were on a loop in your brain. You made your way up to the hotel room, ready to crawl into bed and mull over everything that just happened. I just met THE Bucky Barnes, you thought. Seriously? Quit fangirling and focus. They said you had to make super soldier babies. Surely it’ll be like IVF, right? No, you remember that guy saying something about if they fertilize too many eggs inside you, you could die. It had to be organically. Meaning sex…with Bucky Barnes. You’d think after crushing over this man for most of your life, you’d feel a little less devastated. But the whole “experiment” aspect of it really sucks out any potential for romance. With a heavy sigh, you decided not to think about it until tomorrow. Right now, it’s time for bed.

You woke up insanely early after tossing and turning all night. 3:37 AM. The goon squad said they would pick you up at 9 to start prep for the study. Better kiss your IUD goodbye. Don’t they say it can take a couple months before you can get pregnant? That could give you and Bucky enough time to get to know one another, so the whole sex part won’t be as awkward. But that lady did say that she’s moving up the timeline – boy, this was stressful. Not only did you have to get pregnant, but you’re on a time crunch. You never really did well under pressure.

Bucky also couldn’t sleep, replaying the entire interaction with you over and over, analyzing as much as he could. You came into the room dazed and confused; when your eyes met his, he saw you tense up. He anticipated not being well-received – he was, after all, an infamous Hydra killer. What he couldn’t wrap his head around was the look in your eyes afterwards. You seemed almost relieved. He couldn’t understand why. He HAD to be reading you wrong. So he replayed that moment over and over, trying to come up with a reasonable explanation. Your dark eyes hiding under thick lashes. The deep red blush on your cheeks. The way you fidgeted with your hands. All these details rolling around in his mind. The more he thought about that moment, the more he felt protective of you. He couldn’t let you be a lab rat, pardon be damned.

Finally, 9:00 came around and you soon found yourself back in an exam room at SHIELD. You were right on the verge of passing out from the IUD removal when you heard a commotion down the hall. The doctor quickly finished yanking it out of your cervix and ran off to god knows where. You heard what sounded like hand-to-hand combat – punches landing, grunting, some bones breaking. Suddenly the door to the exam room busts open, causing you to nearly shit your pants (if you were wearing any, you were still clad in nothing but a hospital gown). Bucky’s metal arm was gripping some guy’s throat, dragging him across the room.

“Get dressed,” he ordered.

Your brain was desperately trying to process his command. Dressed, right. Clothes. Where are my clothes? It was hard to think with severe cramping and being a little woozy from that damn IUD removal. While you shimmied off the exam table, Bucky tossed the now passed out guy onto the floor, looking for something. He found your clothes and purse, throwing them at you. He turned around and waited for you to put them on.

“You done?” he asked. “I’m getting you out of here. Follow me and stay close.”

“What? Are you out of your mind?” You were always such a rule follower. God forbid you get in trouble. “Bucky, that lady said you’re already in hot water. Let’s not make this worse, yeah?”

Before he could respond, several agents pop out from the hallway, guns trained right on him.

“Barnes, enough is enough. Quit throwing your little tantrum and get back to your exam room.” It was the same lady from yesterday.

“Or what, you’ll shoot me? Can’t have your little experiment if I’m dead,” Bucky taunted. Without skipping a beat, the woman fired one shot straight into his right shoulder. Agents approached to escort him out of the room, but he threw one of them into the wall with his metal arm. In response, the other agents whipped out taser batons that looked scary as hell.

“Bucky stop,” you pleaded. You were traumatized enough watching him literally get shot, you didn’t need to see him beat the shit out of the other agents while they tased him with their fancy sticks. To your surprise, he actually listened to you. He put his hands up in surrender, dropping the guy he had in a chokehold. He looked over at you defeatedly, knowing his window for breaking you out was now closed.

Chapter 4

Taglist 💛

@kandis-mom

[princess-of-the-corner]

Ace Attorney Ramble

(So, based on my past few submissions & asks, can you tell what my current hyperfixation is??)

So, had this thought, which will not leave me alone now. I think I remember you saying Manfred von Karma being the “gay rights, but only for me” type, and I can definitely see that. But I had the thought (which is now going on repeat in my brain), that von Karma is more of “What is this ‘Gay’ you speak of??”, mixed with “Gay is ABSOLUTELY a choice”. Like, sort of same but opposite of how you write Enji. Manfred is attracted to men, is fully aware he’s attracted to men, and is making the conscious choice to ignore it. As far as he’s aware, EVERYONE is attracted to the same gender as themselves, but we all ignore it, because continuing the species and family lines are more important. Someone would try to make an argument about how it isn’t a choice, just how human beings are built, and von Karma would fire back about how humans have changed faster than evolution, how we have loads of things that are imperfect about the human body that we “fix”, like eyesight, or the appendix.

Like. He would absolutely appear homophobic, would spout a lot of bullshit that sounds the same, but his actual issue isn’t people being ATTRACTED to the same gender. It’s ACKNOWLEDGING it, because as far as von Karma is aware, attraction to the same gender is on the same level as other things he considers “weak” - addiction, illness, compassion, hurt feelings. Everyone has them, but only WEAKLINGS indulge in such things. A von Karma doesn’t INDULGE, they overcome and surmount! They are never ANYTHING less than perfect, and perfect means a spouse that can give you an heir to the family. He probably had a whole portfolio of men Franziska could pick from to marry and have kids with, based on a bunch of bullshit social stuff. She might argue about IVF, and von Karma would be SCANDALIZED she’d suggest such a thing! He would hound, harass, and maybe even blackmail his daughter into getting hitched and having a kid. And once Franziska had the kid, he would cheerfully support her through a divorce. Social standing observed, boxes ticked, business concluded.

Sort of conversely, I think he’d be simultaneously totally cool with trans people, and also very transphobic. Like, if someone he worked with went up to him and said, “Hey, just so you know, I’m actually a man, my name is Victor now,” he’d be all, “Not sure why you think I care, Mr. Tree, I have cases to deal with,” and never misgender the guy. But if he found out Mr. Victor Tree was taking time off to have transitional surgery, he’d be scornful over the guy “taking time off for something as trivial as THAT”, like, putting your mental and physical health? Over your JOB?? He’d start bringing it up all the time, “oh, are you sure you have time to take that case?? What if you need to go to the hospital? Maybe this case should be trusted to someone with a stronger … constitution”. And the whole office thinks it’s cause Victor is trans, but no, it’s cause he willingly and deliberately sought out medical care.

My big takeaway thing is, I read a lot of fics where Miles has hang ups about his sexuality due to being raised by von Karma, and while I don’t disagree with them, I think it’s more likely that Miles had bigger issues acknowledging needing breaks, or medical care. Like, Franziska got shot, had surgery to remove the bullet, and then immediately left the hospital to find a guy and deliver critical evidence to a courtroom. Miles should be the guy who says, “it’s only a flesh wound,”, meanwhile, he’s been stabbed in the gut, and everyone is pleading with him to go to the hospital. He takes A hit to the head, insists he’s fine, and proceeds to solve a murder with a concussion. His pain tolerance is through the roof, and this is a bad thing.

(Thoughts, feedback?)

-

Honestly you’re right I think he’d see attraction of any kind to be ‘weakness’ so clearly whatever mess his marriage was is a very un-attracted one for other purposes like children or something. Having sex with a woman doesn’t count because he’s not giving in to attraction he’s just doing a business transaction.

Then yeah rip Miles and Franziska they’re gonna be like ‘Hm. My bloods on the outside of me. Pretty sure that’s fine.”

[archiveofkloss]

vogue: “Karlie Kloss and Tabria Majors Discuss the Physical Toll (and Joy) of Motherhood” by Audrey Noble

“Are you by chance part of the mom tribe?” Karlie Kloss asks me over the phone. It’s a natural—even expected—start to our conversation about the model and entrepreneur’s latest campaign for diaper brand Coterie, which is all about celebrating the physical journey of motherhood.

Though I am very much in my single, child-free era, motherhood is something that I hope is in the cards for me. And it is Kloss’s and fellow model and Coterie campaign costar Tabria Majors’s palpable excitement on my respective phone calls with each where they gushed about their little ones that strengthened my resolve to have a family of my own one day. (So much so, that I may or may not have enlisted their help to manifest it for me). Simply put: They love beings moms.

“It’s the greatest experience in my life,” Kloss tells Vogue. “I mean, maybe it’s the hormones, but it just gives me the greatest joy every single day to wake up and have these two little delicious humans whom I just love so much.”

“It’s just crazy to see how much she’s changed and seeing her little personality developing,” Majors says of her six-month-old daughter. “Just seeing her laugh all the time, it just warms my heart.”

The campaign, which debuted in early February, features Kloss (who invested in the Coterie late last year); Majors; board-certified pediatrician Dr. Mona Amin, MD; celebrity nail artist Mei Kawajiri; and influencer Reese Blutstein, sharing their pregnancy stories in hopes of inspiring others who might be struggling with the changes to their bodies—which is a topic that isn’t often spoken about.

Studies show that the rib cage can expand two to three inches and ligaments can stretch between the second and third trimester. According to the Mayo Clinic, the heart pumps 50 percent more blood to nourish the baby, while the American Academy of Dermatology notes that hair loss is prevalent in new moms. When you pair systemic failures in proper reproductive education with societal expectations to look “perfect” 24/7, many might feel confused and discouraged when witnessing their bodies go through major changes.

“You kind of just have to trust the process. I have learned to love and respect my body through this process, and with that comes changes,” says Kloss. “Of course, I have all the things like stretch marks and all the fun post-baby body things that I’m not mad at. They make me who I am, and I’m so grateful for that.”

Pre- and post-pregnancy can be a lonely experience, even if you are lucky enough to have a full support system. Which is why Majors says sharing pregnancy stories is important to help people feel less alone. She tells me about the outpour of love and support from fans over her birthing story has been an emotional, yet beautiful experience. She even recalls one woman messaging her and saying that her story encouraged her to proceed with her own home birthing—something that Majors says she will never forget. “I just thought that was really powerful and inspiring for me,” she says. “That just makes me feel really good that my story could impact somebody in such a way.”

It would be remiss to not acknowledge that the launch of Coterie’s campaign coincidently coincides with news of the Alabama Supreme Court ruling that embryos created through in vitro fertilization (IVF) are considered people, putting the legality of the procedure into question and further harming reproductive health care. The fight to protect reproductive rights is at the forefront during what is shaping to be a contentious presidential election year. These issues are not lost on either Kloss or Majors, who both intentionally pick brand partnerships that not only align with their personal beliefs but can also help make a difference. Both credit Coterie for creating a safe space for women to advocate for themselves.

“[I] hate that our bodies are being policed; I don’t understand how that’s even a thing. It makes no sense,” says Majors. “I think that’s why it's important for these partnerships to happen. [But] even outside of partnerships, you don’t have to be paid to speak up. You should just want to speak up naturally because this affects everybody on such a macro level.”

“It’s an individual's choice if and when they’re ready to become a parent. This is such a profound life change in every way and I think it should be an individual’s choice if and when they’re ready for that,” adds Kloss. “It [has] only reconfirmed my passion and commitment to fighting for reproductive rights, certainly in every state in this country.”

I ask them what’s the best mom advice they’ve received, and both give two truths that could be applied to all facets of life: Trust the timing of the universe and trust yourself. “You just have to learn to roll with the punches,” says Kloss. “Motherhood is messy and amazing. I think [it has] actually been so important for me to be more comfortable with not being able to control everything because that’s just the way it goes.”

“Trust your gut, trust your instinct,” adds Majors. “Especially as a first-time parent, you think that you don’t know anything (and you don’t), but you figure it out as you go along. And even if you didn’t research yourself to death, which I know everybody does nowadays, you will know what to do. You will figure out what to do. Your instincts will kick in, and it’s just a crazy feeling.”

Noted for my future self.

[tomorrowusa]

Nikki Haley believes that frozen embryos are babies. She said this in response to a decision by the Alabama Supreme Court which reads like it was written by a fundamentalist extremist.

Haley addressed the issue in a pair of TV interviews hours apart, days after Alabama's high court said that frozen embryos in test tubes should be considered children, rattling doctors and patients in reproductive medicine as well as raising legal questions. "Embryos, to me, are babies," Haley told NBC News. "When you talk about an embryo, you are talking about, to me, that's a life. And so I do see where that's coming from when they talk about that." Asked in a CNN interview later on Wednesday about the remarks, she said: "I didn't say that I agreed with the Alabama ruling."

The Alabama ruling has created turmoil in hospitals and clinics in the state offering in-vitro fertilization (IVF).

The ruling was greeted by widespread shock in Alabama, which has one of the nation's strictest abortion laws, according to news reports, with patients confused about whether to proceed with IVF and others wondering whether to move their embryos. The University of Alabama at Birmingham paused in-vitro fertilization after the state supreme court ruling, due to fear of prosecution and lawsuits, a hospital representative said.

Haley's comment is in the same category of silliness as Mitt Romney's 2011 comment that "corporations are people".

The Alabama decision is another demonstration of how Republicans are trying to crush reproductive freedom in the United States. And Haley demonstrated that just because she's running against Trump doesn't mean that she's a moderate on the issue.

The only way to protect reproductive freedom in the US is to vote Democratic for every office on the ballot. Republicans are pathologically obsessed with reproduction. They spent 49 years working to overturn Roe v. Wade.

Biden blasts Alabama Supreme Court's IVF ruling as Harris, campaign blame Trump

Keep Republicans away from your gonads. Register and vote.

I Will Vote

These people in Walker County helped elect the Alabama Supreme Court which consists of nine Republicans. They will never miss a chance to vote for wingnuts. If you skip an election or waste votes on third-party losers then people like these voters will elect MAGA Republicans in your absence.

[note-a-bear]

SCREAMING

There's apparently a romantic drama out now (based on a book, allegedly) where the premise is:

Boy meets girl

Girl dies circa hs? (That's what it seems like)

He remembers she was an ivf baby and that makes him think she might have a 'twin'

He *finds* this twin (no don't worry about how this makes sense or the logistics of ivf)

She's apparently the same age as his dead high school sweetheart and he proceeds to woo her?

And she's okay with this?

And everyone has a happy life after?

I am LOSING MY MIND. They somehow took all the weird ethical questions from the 'im a time traveler and I fell in love with adult you, so I have to make sure to orchestrate the past to make sure it happens, including dubious not-romancing-but-kinda of a child/younger you' and put them in boldface.

I'm almost unsettled enough to watch it

[crimswnred]

HC’s of how your LIs would react to finding out she’s pregnant? For the girls let’s say they’ve been trying for ages through IVF/donors.

LOVE LOVE LOVEEEE

thanks for the question!! from your ask I gathered you mean MC and LI have been trying to have a baby, right?!

with that in mind, I'll be doing my favourite LIs that I think would love to have a child 💕 if you have any specific LI in mind, pls send me an ask.

as always, please look under the cut 👇

☆ SEASON 1

JAKE

when you finally get that positive result you're not only overflowing with happiness but also are planning to make a special announcement for daddy. there's tiny little baby shoes in a surprise box, there's cameras recording and there's MOST DEFINITELY tears. Jake can't contain his happiness and he's crying as soon as he spots the tiny shoes. then, he's swirling you around. it's just a very very happy moment.

TIM

when he sees the test and looks at you searching for confirmation — because let's face it, Tim doesn't know how a pregnancy test works — he is screaming and kissing you. also, he IMMEDIATELY calls his mom to share the news. maybe even facetiming her while he cries like a baby. he's the happiest man in the world and is already thinking of names.

TALIA

I'm a little torn between whether or not she wants to have children and I don't have any recollection if that's talked about during S1 but I'm doing it anyway.

she just can't believe it. she looks at you, then she looks at the test and then she looks at you again in complete shock. not too long after, she's crying and hugging you and just keeping you close. it's been a long time coming and she's just so, so, happy. the moment isn't loud, it's intimate. just between the two of you.

☆ SEASON 2

BOBBY

oh, man. I believe Bobby is a very family centred guy, that's why the perfect announcement would be when your families are reunited. picture the whole fam in the living room! you get up, everyone is paying attention and you announce it. Bobby gasps, then grabs you, then twirls you and then gets all worried because can he do that if you're pregnant? you're laughing all the time, even when he starts crying. the fam is looking at you guys adoringly and I can see a lot of pictures being taken (and a lot of questions being asked as well)

NOAH

you sit Noah down on the bed, grabs his hands and tells him the news. the big smile on his face and the twinkle in his eyes leave you with no doubt: he IS the one. he waste no time on touching your belly and kissing you tenderly. the moment is simple but it's also private, intimate and very special. it gets you so emotional that you can't help but cry and he also sheds a tear.

☆ SEASON 3

AJ

she's immediately jumping around, hugging you, screaming, kissing you. it's a big party as soon as she hears the word 'pregnant', there's no need to see the test. she's calling everyone, the news are spreading like wildfire and you don't even try to stop her because you don't remember ever seeing AJ that happy. the same night, she's following every baby related profile she can find.

NICKY

this man is on his knees kissing your belly from the moment you show him the test. of course, he still wants to be 100% sure and take a blood test, but when I say he is absolutely BEYOND HAPPY when he sees the lines. talks directly to the baby about how he just can't wait to see them 💕

☆ SEASON 4

BRUNO

DEAR GOD. this man will go through every stage of happiness in 5 seconds. he'll be sooooo shocked at first, asking you a BILLION times if you're sure. once you confirm to him that YES you're fucking sure, he will then cry, hug you, kiss you, repeat his wedding vows, call his mama, talk to the baby, then proceed to act like you're 8 months pregnant even though you're barely a month. already thinking of a bunch of dad jokes.

YOUCEF

I really think Youcef would be soooooo emotional. he's crying in a way you've never seen him cry before and suddenly the feeling of his touch is way more soft and tender. It's a vere honest moment between you, and he demonstrates soooo much love. I really think that being a dad is a major thing for him and he couldn't be happier to share this moment with you.

📌 headcanons masterlist.

[abyssal-debonair]

https://www.washingtonpost.com/nation/2024/02/20/alabama-supreme-court-ivf-embryos

Throughout Alabama, there is widespread shock, anger and confusion over how to proceed after the state Supreme Court ruled Friday that frozen embryos are people, a potentially far-reaching decision that could upend women’s reproductive health care in a state that already has one of the nation’s strictest abortion laws. “Women who actually know what happened, they feel under attack and almost powerless,” said AshLeigh Meyer Dunham, a Birmingham mother who conceived a child through in vitro fertilization and is a partner in a law firm that specializesin assisted reproductive technology cases. “First you had the Dobbs decision and now this. What does this even mean?” The state Supreme Court decision signals a new chapter in America’s fight over reproductive rights and marks another blow to women’s rights groups that expect similar challenges in other conservative states. The ruling is limited to Alabama, but legal experts say it could embolden the “personhood movement,” which asserts that unborn children should be granted legal rights beginning at conception.

wayback machine link

[kickingitwithkirk]

Greetings from Austin

Summary: Jensen and Jared are at odds over a monumental decision that changes their lives in a way they couldn’t have envisioned.

Pairing: Alpha!Jensen Ackles x Alpha!Jared Padalecki x Omega!OFC

Word Count: 1824

Warnings: a/b/o, J2 are married/mated, homophobia, bisexuality, biphobia, angst, cursing, jealousy, depression/anxiety, medical stuff, sexual dysfunction, infertility, IVF, surrogacy

*additional warnings to be added in future parts.

A/N: Here we go again with one my weird as hell dreams, series Inspired by this art.

A/N II: There is no intentional hate or malevolence intended towards any of the Ackles or Padalecki families. This is a purely fictional piece containing real and created persons/names/events set in the fictional A/B/O verse. Some dates/events altered to fit story.

*no beta-all mistakes are mine

*divider by @writeyourmindaway​​​​​​

*images found online

Part I

Jared was about to speak when a woman in scrubs called out, “Mr. Bonham and Mr. Page.” they got up and crossed over to her, “Hello, I’m Sissy, Dr. Rodgers nurse, please follow me.”

They pass through the doorway leading through a maze of halls like any other medical clinic, except this one specializes in a particular service.

The nurse opens a door near the back of the clinic, gesturing for them to enter the spacious office, “Please have a seat. The doctor will be with you shortly.” She closed the door, and they sat directly in the pair of chairs before the large, dark mahogany desk.

Jensen, scenting Jared’s nervousness, lifts his right hand, kissing his palm, making him chuckle at the tickle of Jen’s soft beard before twining their fingers together and setting them on his left thigh. He smiles as the door opens, and a silver-haired Beta enters.

 “Hello, I’m Dr. Rodgers. How are we doing today?” He asks, moving to the chair behind the desk.

Jared gave him a tight smile, and Jensen remained placid.

The doctor raises an eyebrow, “Relax, Mr. Page. This visit is to review your paperwork before deciding how we proceed, not the Spanish Inquisition.” Jared released his held breath but couldn’t wholly calm himself.

“I know the process can be overwhelming, but I must ask, is there something we’ve done to make you uncomfortable?” Dr. Rodgers inquires.

“No, everyone’s been nice, very professional; we’ve had issues the first time attempting this.” Jared finished his sentence, but something terrible will happen in the recess of his mind, and it’ll be my fault. Jensen squeezes his hand tighter, instinctively sensing Jared’s mind is trying to spiral. “When we tried this before someone leaked our plans to the media, it wasn't conclusively proven the clinic wasn’t involved.”

We do everything possible to keep our client's anonymity protected here. All of the staff are vetted and sign an NDA. Your real identities will remain confidential, even if you choose not to proceed. It is why you chose this clinic, yes?”

“Yes, it is,” Jensen replied.

“How about we get this bit of paperwork out of the way? Then we can have a more relaxed visit,” he says, shuffling more papers.

“I’ve reviewed the applications you’ve submitted and noted a few discrepancies in the medical section that need clarification. Mr. Bonham, why did you omit Genu Varum from your medical record?”

Jensen kept his expression neutral and felt his stomach automatically clench. He remembered being mercilessly teased throughout childhood about his bowed legs by his older brother Josh and later his buddies when they’d come over to hang out.

By the time he was in high school Jensen’s striking looks and personality got people’s attention first, and nowadays, fantasies are composed in fanfic about his bowed legs.

“The questionnaire inquired about inherited genetic medical conditions; since mine isn’t, I didn’t think it was necessarily applicable.” Jared hears an edge creeping into Jensen’s voice and squeezes his fingers.

“Did you see an orthopedist, and could they determine what caused the condition?”

“I was born a preemie. The orthopedists my parents consulted decided my condition was attributable to that,” Jensen replies tersely, dropping his vocal range. Jared gripped his hand harder, telling him to cool his attitude.

 “Did they suggest surgical procedures or therapies to straighten your legs?”

“No, the doctor didn’t recommend surgery but sent me to physical therapy, thinking it would help them straighten as I grew.”

“So, no others in your immediate family have this issue?”

“Everyone in my family has straight legs, including my three children.”

Jared piped in, “he hates it, but he does this exercise regimen; stretching, strength training. He also takes several vitamins, omega oils, turmeric, and extra vitamin D to support his joints.” They watched the doctor scribble a few more notes.

“Mr. Page,” Jared sat up straighter, “I appreciate that you detailed your mental health status. You’ve recently been hospitalized and have changed your routine to an alternative regimen, increasing your therapy sessions. Has this helped?”

The interview continued for another twenty minutes as Dr. Rodgers questioned him and Jensen in depth about his depression and anxiety; feeling it was ratcheting up, he focused on Jensen’s thumb rhythmically moving over his and used every ounce of his acting skills to appear confident and in control.

Dr. Rodgers closed the files, “I only have a few general questions left, then we can discuss how you wish to proceed.”

After a more relaxed, genial conversation with the doctor, Sissy took them to a couple of private rooms with paraphernalia to help stimulate them into producing a couple of semen samples.

Jensen was getting close to finishing with his favorite spank-bank fantasy when he felt Jared across their bond.

~~~

Jared couldn’t get aroused.

He felt as useless as his flaccid cock.

His doctor warned him that losing his sex drive could be a possible side effect of his new regimen until his body adjusted to it. He had struggled with temporary impotence a few times on his old meds; always fearful Jensen would finally see him as undesirable, no longer a satisfactory mate.

Rationally, he knew it was his illness causing these exceptionally hard-to-deal thoughts recently, and the nagging idea this wasn’t the right thing for them continually kept creeping in. Plus, Jensen’s reluctance about having more children at his age also weighed on his conscience, warring against his biological longings.

They had a humongous argument when he told his husband about the appointment. 

Jensen said this was the wrong time to attempt it again, pointing out he was getting his equilibrium back set Jared off on a rant about how he no longer wanted him and would leave like Genevieve had because he was too broken to deal with anymore.

Unmitigated anguish crossed Jensen’s beautiful features. The notion that his mate could believe that he’d ever abandon him hurt so that no verbal language could ever express how that devastated him after everything they’d been through.

That bar fight to Jared’s first breakdown on set, the years of living as roommates while secretly a couple to finding wives who understood their unique relationship and still married them both in 2010.

Unfortunately, the joyous arrival of JJ three years later exacerbated Genevieve’s frustration of not being able to conceive, and it came out with a vengeance on Jared.

His unexpected breakdown in Switzerland was the final nail in their marriage. Gen was there for him, but it was all too much in the end, and she filed for divorce.

Shortly after, Jared’s iCloud account got hacked.

They believed but never conclusively proved Genevive was behind it since her lawyer was trying to break their prenuptial agreement; the videos documenting his intimate and explicit sexual relationship with Jensen were legally considered adulterous. In the end, the court upheld the legal document, but the ramifications that resulted after.

They were summoned to L.A. for the meeting from hell with WB executives, convinced it was the end of Supernatural and their careers. After the reaming out, they each received a week's pay suspension to cover some of what will cost PR time and money to deal with the inevitable repercussions and appease the show’s sponsors.

How would the show’s fans react? Would they still be able to accept them as brothers only on TV while in real life, they were involved in a highly stigmatized relationship? When they returned to work, there was an atmosphere of tension that hadn’t existed before.

It was an open secret that all shows had their share of bitchiness and backstabbing behind the scenes. Jensen may have thicker skin, keeping tighter control of his emotions, but Jared knew it hurt him just as deeply the loss of some of their friends because of society's prejudicial belief that two Alpha males shouldn’t be involved.

Alan and Donna showed up unexpectedly in Vancouver a few weeks later.

What started as a not-quite-comfortable visit quickly deteriorated thanks to his parents' religious conservatism. They had not raised him like this and blamed Jared, saying he had corrupted their son, leading him into a sinful lifestyle, and told Jensen he needed to repent and return to the wife he’d committed to before god.

Jensen blew up, replying it was none of their business, it was between them, and Danneel knew about them before marrying; he reiterated they better not say anything to her. Without another word, his parents left, and he later called them to make amends. His mother coolly stated that he was no longer part of their family and never to contact them again.

After the twins were born in 2016 came the finalization of Jensen’s divorce from Danneel, painful but congenial. They readily agreed on joint custody and still spent most holidays together. Jensen gave her financial security in their settlement, wanting to make sure she didn’t have to worry about working unless she wanted to.

They received support when publicly coming out as bisexual, then lost some of it when they married, and, to this day, get mocked for not coming out as gay, and Jared continually has nagging thoughts that they have let everybody down.

***

There was another knock at the door, and Jared ignored it, knowing it was that nurse checking on his lack of progress again turned into pounding, “Jared, open this door now, dammit!”

He flinched, realizing Jensen knew what was going on with him. 

Releasing the privacy latch, opens the door a crack and saw concerned green eyes. “Sorry, I thought you were that nurse,” he stepped away and sat back down as Jensen came in, re-latching it behind him. “She came to get me when you stopped answering,” Jensen said, walking over and running his thick fingers through his husband’s long hair, “what’s going on, babe?”

He knows that Jensen already knew, “It’s okay, Jar, take as long as you need.” He paused at the unpleasant scent wafting around him. “If you’d be more comfortable, we could do this at home.” 

Jared shakes his head, “There’s the risk of damage, contamination, and or unable to get it back in time that could make the semen unusable.” Jared quotes from a website.

Jensen softly chuckled, “Nerd,” and Jared noticed the bulge in his jeans, “You didn’t….”

“Drain the snake..choke the chicken..spank the monkey.”

“Fuck! Stop using old man slang.” He shook his head, smiling up at Jensen, intentionally goading him.

Jared reached up for the hand playing in his hair, grasping it to draw Jensen next to him.

“Jack, I don’t want to wait any longer on doing this. I love JJ and the twins, you know I do, but they’ll always be yours and Danneels. I know the timing could be better. I’m almost thirty-eight, and I want our pups running around the house, driving us crazy.”

“For the next eighteen years?”

“Minimum.”

tbc

Part II

SPN TAGS: @donnaintx  @lyarr24  @flamencodiva  @b3autyfuldisast3r  @lassie-bird @nancymcl  @spnbaby-67  @leigh70

Sam/Jared:  @idreamofplaid Dean/Jensen:  @thoughts-and-funnies  @stoneyggirl2  @akshi8278  @beabutterfly987 @smoothdogsgirl  @siospins2

GFA: @babypink224221 @waywardjoy @let-me-luve-you @all-4-wincest

[forlornmelody]

Queer Movie Review #31: You Me & Him

I fully confess: I found this film because the second season of Good Omens left a gaping hole in my heart. I've been slowly, methodically consuming various appearances of both David Tennant and Michael Sheen. Somehow, that meandering led me here. I held off for a bit--pregnancy stories usually squick me out. (Hence why I never finished the L Word. I KNOW.) But over time, I couldn't stay away any longer. You Me and Him just looked too FUN. And it was. So. Much. Fun.

You Me & Him tells the story of a lesbian couple, Olivia and Alex, (Lucy Punch and Faye Marsay), and their neighbor, John (David Tennant.) Olivia desperately wants to have a baby, and age 40, is quickly running out of time. Alex, still trying to figure out what to do with her life, wants more time to consider. Olivia gets IVF and tells Alex at John's divorce party. Alex gets black-out drunk and hooks up with John. And both of them get pregnant. Surpising both of them, John wants to be involved.

As nice as it is to have wholesome and "good" queer representation, I've been craving messy queer romances lately. And this movie delivers. A lot of characters make their assumptions about Olivia and Alex based on what happened with John, and all of them are wrong. John, of course, is desperately in love with Alex. And Alex only loves Olivia, despite their differences. Yet she wants John to be involved in raising their child, and he provides a sort of emotional support that Olivia often fails to give. But everyone else in their life assumes they're some sort of throuple, though they keep telling them otherwise.

Each character felt like a real person. I've met plenty of women like Olivia who would do anything to be a mother. And I relate to Alex in a lot of ways--constantly trying to figure out what to do with my life. If John were a real person, I'd punch him in the face. But as a fictional character, he is hilarious. And I will say he has a good arc. They all do, really.

Without spoiling too much, I should include a couple content warnings. Both Olivia's parents, and Alex's mom are homophobic. There is also a scene involving a loss of pregnancy. Proceed with caution if either of those things will ruin your day.

Would I recommend this absolutely weird film? Of course! Even as someone who is usually squicked out by pregnancy stories, I found this movie hilarious.

Queer Movie Review Masterpost

Recommend A Queer Movie

[jwood718]

Alabama Supreme Court cites the Bible as it confers personhood on embryos in fertility clinics. Adria R. Walker writes in The Guardian:

"In a first-of-its-kind decision, the Alabama supreme court ruled Friday that frozen embryos are 'children', allowing two wrongful death suits against a Mobile fertility clinic to proceed...

Alabama's Supreme Court building. wikipedia

In 2021, a patient at Mobile’s Center for Reproductive Medicine wandered into the clinic’s cryogenic nursery and removed several embryos...'the subzero temperatures at which the embryos had been stored freeze-burned the patient’s hand, causing the patient to drop the embryos on the floor, killing them'...

Alabama supreme court justice Jay Mitchell wrote that embryos are indeed protected under the state’s existing law: 'The central question presented in these consolidated appeals, which involve the death of embryos kept in a cryogenic nursery, is whether the act contains an unwritten exception to that rule for extrauterine children...Under existing black-letter law, the answer to that question is no: the Wrongful Death of a Minor Act applies to all unborn children, regardless of their location.'...

...In 2018, Alabama voters passed a ballot measure granting fetuses full personhood rights, but the measure did not note whether that applied to frozen embryos.

In vitro fertilization. Dallas IVF.

The Alabama supreme court’s ruling repeatedly references God and the sanctity of life, citing the Bible and biblical scholars including Petrus van Mastricht, Thomas Aquinas and John Calvin. Chief Justice Thomas Parker wrote: 'Human life cannot be wrongfully destroyed without incurring the wrath of a holy God, who views the destruction of His image as an affront to Himself … this is true of unborn human life no less than it is of all other human life – that even before birth, all human beings bear the image of God, and their lives cannot be destroyed without effacing his glory.' [emphasis added]

Cook, the lone dissenting judge, argued that the decision should have been a legislative one, not a judicial one.

“It is not my role to judge whether ending this medical procedure is good or bad -- but it doubtless will have a huge impact on many Alabamians. And it underscores the need to have the legislature – not this court – address these issues through the legislative process.”

The recent decision will probably elevate the issue of personhood ahead of the 2024 elections.

Full story from The Guardian and audio from NPR's All Things Considered, by Alejandra Marquez Janse, Justine Kenin, and Alisa Chang.

What I wonder is: what happens now to the embryos that are implanted, but fail? In the All Things Consider story, it is highlighted that multiple embryos are the norm in the procedure as just one may not result in pregnancy, so additional embryos are on-hand for a multiple attempts. If that single implementation fails, is the woman seeking to become a mother then liable for that embryo's death? It would be an easy leap for a state government to come to this conclusion, and penalize the patient. Would they cite religious texts to do so, even if the patient wasn't Christian? If that state supreme court has no hesitation in touting itself as unabashedly Christian, there won't be much stopping others doing so.

[coochiequeens]

Alabama today

Alabama earlier this month

"But kids in the Gulf States won’t see any of those funds this summer. In Louisiana and Mississippi, state leadership declined to expand the program. Alabama missed the deadline to set aside funds for their half of the expansion, which would have totaled millions of dollars.

About a third of families living below the poverty line in America suffer from food insecurity, research from the USDA shows. In Louisiana and Mississippi, the rate is higher than the national average. 

Carol Gundlach is a senior policy analyst for Alabama Arise, a nonprofit that focuses on people living in poverty. She said that while food insecurity affects poor people the most, Black families are impacted more heavily.

“In Alabama, 14% of Alabama households had reported in October that they sometimes, or often, did not have enough food to eat,” Gundlach said. “21% of Black households in Alabama — and these are families with children specifically — reported they didn’t have enough to eat sometimes or often.”

[athenawasamerf]

A bit of a random Q but i really need an outsiders perspective on this - my girlfriend has recently suggested that we might want to consider having intercourse with a man as an easier and “more natural” alternative to IVF/IUI, the latter being expensive & invasive. I am a lesbian and she is bi. She says it’s not that deep and it would make our lives much easier (don’t know exactly how she imagines the whole set up but let’s just go with it for now). Am I overreacting if i find that ‘proposal’ terribly offensive and disgusting? Even though she’s not insisting on anything, the mere suggestion feels so wrong and r*pe-y to me and I cannot stop thinking/imagining it, and with that wondering how could she ever suggest that… It’s also my gf’s first committed relationship with a woman and I almost feel like she hasn’t yet processed the fact that yes, as gay women getting pregnant is difficult & expensive and that sucks but it’s part of the deal…

I’ll start by saying that this is a delicate and complex situation that I can’t pass any judgment on from one ask, but I’ll do my best to help you sort out your thoughts and how to proceed, but this might be something you want to bring up with a professional counsellor or therapist.

First of all, it’s completely normal to feel offended and disgusted by that. Sex is a very intimate, vulnerable act, and you shouldn’t have to pretend that the thought of your girlfriend (or you) having sex with a man is anything less than horrifying. It sucks that assisted pregnancy is expensive and finicky, but that shouldn’t drive you into situations you don’t feel comfortable with. Just because it’s ‘not that deep’ to her, doesn’t mean that applies to you.

I understand where she’s coming from, but I don’t think it’s a healthy or safe way of having a child. Knowing who the biological father is, especially if he’s not a family member who donated sperm to help you, is a mess you don’t want to get tangled in. What if he sues for custody and child support? You’ll always have that looming over you. What if he attacks you/your girlfriend? What if that doesn’t result in a pregnancy right away? How many times is she willing to put one/both of you through that? Pragmatically, it’s just exchanging one problem for 20.

Besides, unless you struggle with fertility or want to carry your partner’s biological child, you won’t have to do IVF, which is incredible expensive and invasive. Using a sperm bank should suffice, and that’s a much simpler procedure and about as natural as assisted fertility gets. It’s essentially using a syringe to deposit donated sperm where it would naturally go during inter course and then letting your body do its thing.

I think the best course of action is to sit your girlfriend down and discuss your thoughts and feelings with her thoroughly, explain that the involvement of a known man in your relationship and the conception of your child is not something you’re comfortable with, and that she needs to be realistic about the limitations of having kids in a gay relationship.

Gay relationships are vastly different from straight ones, and that’s something your girlfriend might struggle to grasp in her first committed relationship with a woman. Since I don’t know her/her thought process relating to this, I can’t offer any more insight than what you already suggested. It takes some getting used to, for sure.

I hope you manage to sort this out together. And good luck on your (future) pregnancy and parenthood. 💕