#IVE WORKED ON THIS ONE TOO LONG FUCK IT WE BALL
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slasherscream · 8 months ago
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Wash Day
pairing:  jordan li x fem black!reader
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"You wanna go out to dinner tonight? Know I've been busy this week. Feel like I've barely seen you." Jordan mutters against the shell of your ear. You shiver as he gives the skin a teasing kiss.
Already you're pouting, knowing what your answer has to be even though you wish so desperately that you could give a different response. "Wish I could, Jordan. But my night is already spoken for."
You're spun around by a hand on your hip, playful and fast so that you can't stop yourself from falling into his chest. Your hands grip his jacket for balance, and he reaches up to hold one of them with his own. "You got plans? With who? Cate? Cancel them."
"Brat." You laugh.
How demanding Jordan is would be less cute if they ever asked you to do something they themselves wouldn't. As it stands, with the way they do anything you ask at the drop of a hat, all you can do is roll your eyes and pretend to be exasperated instead of smitten.
"Fine, don't cancel. I'll just come with." Jordan sighs, as if seeing his best friend is a great tragedy (Which it is. Cate being there means you'll smack Jordan's hand away when he tries to sneak it up your skirt at dinner.)
"What if we want a girls' night?" You shoot back, grinning.
Jordan shifts. The hands on your waist are smaller now, but pull you in closer, "You're the one who's feeling bratty. Really have been neglecting you this week, huh baby?" Jordan smirks, in that condescending way she does when she realizes you're trying to get a certain reaction out of her.
"The plans aren't with Cate, and they aren't cancellable." You sigh, deciding not to rise to the bait of her tone, smirk, or the little circles she's rubbing into your skin.
"What are these oh so important plans?" Jordan asks.
"Do you know how many white boys have complimented my hair today, Jordan?" You ask.
"Pardon?" Jordan blinks at what seems to be a completely unrelated topic.
"Six! Six white boys complimented my braids today. I'm about to kill myself, if we're being honest. I must looked fucked up, and you didn't even say anything." You pout.
You've been having a bit of a rough day, to say the least.
"You look beautiful. What are you talking about?" Jordan asks, confused but nonetheless, wanting to make you feel better. "If you didn't look good I'd very politely... have Cate tell you. But you look great! You've been getting compliments all day, you just said it yourself!"
"Wow, you'd throw Cate under the bus, huh coward?"
"Cate isn't interested in making out with you every spare second of the day. I am. You can be mad at her. I've got stuff I wanna do." Jordan's grin is downright salacious. You smack her arm, trying not to smile.
"Ah. You are operating under the same delusions of the white man. I see that now, I'll let go of the anger." You say, sighing and kissing Jordan on the cheek.
"First of all, don't you ever fucking insult me like that again.... Second of all, what particular delusion am I sharing with the white man?" Jordan asks.
"White men only compliment a black woman's hairstyle at two points in time. When it's brand spanking, fresh off the lot new. Or when it's started to look like shit. I've had these braids in for longer than... is your business. So guess which compliment I'm getting right now?"
"I fucking refuse to say your hair looks like shit, and this conversation feels like a trap. You're always beautiful to me." Jordan says.
"Thank you, baby. But we live on a campus where the diversity win photographers lurk around every corner trying to get pictures of 'The Diversity Win Couple' in our most natural state. I need to take out my braids tonight before I talk crazy in the group chat, and Andre sends me a 'this you?' pic that will devastate my argument." You shake your head somberly, already imagining the fate that lies before you.
"You could stop talking crazy in the group chat." Jordan teases.
"You know damn well I'm not capable of that."
The two of you burst into laughter, unable to keep it together. Jordan has always been obsessed with how easy it is for you to make them laugh.
"Is that gonna take up your whole night, though, baby? We don't have to go to dinner early! We'll go wherever you want." Jordan insists, tone bordering on begging.
Whenever they come out of a particularly busy week, they spend the next two weeks glued to you. As if to make up for it. The clinginess is a stark difference from how they acted before you made things official.
"Jordan, look at the braids on my head."
"I'm looking at them."
"Are you seeing them with your eyes?"
"Yes, and my eyes are sending the image to my brain, which I assure you is working. What's your point here, baby?"
"How long do you think it will take me to undo these, detangle my hair, wash it, deep condition it, and then wash it again?"
Jordan squints at you for a long moment, analyzing your hairstyle and the utter displeasure on your face. "I dunno? Maybe... four hours?"
"I should fucking murder you. Just for that, you're helping me with wash day now."
Jordan's face breaks into a grin like sunlight breaking through clouds, "So I do get to spend the day with you, is what you're saying?"
"Yeah, baby, you get to spend the day with me." You click your tongue at them. Pitying them for the ache in their fingers they're about to feel. They complain about curling their God damn hair a couple of times a week. You suspect you'll be ready to kill one another by hour two.
But you also missed them a lot. Or whatever.
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"Don't cut too high up, Jordie. " You whine, shifting his grip lower on your braid, to an acceptable cutting length of the hair extension.
"Baby... can I ask you a very serious question right now?" Jordan hums, obediently cutting where you instructed.
"What?" You ask, already starting to unbraid the piece.
"How... long... do you think your hair is?" Jordan, to be fair to him, does ask the question quietly and with the proper amount of hesitation.
"How dare you! Are you calling me bald?" You gasp, stifling a laugh.
"Don't do this to me. You are prolonging the process. We can cut these braids at least four inches higher than what we're doing right now." Jordan says, you can't see his face but you can tell he's also trying not to laugh. Bastard.
"My hair grew!"
"From the top of your head. It did not magically lower itself further into the fucking braid extension." Jordan loses the battle and laughs.
"Jordan Li do not fucking cut off any of my hair or I'll cry and then blow up this school."
"Of course, princess." Jordan kisses the top of your head and gives in to your terrorist demands because you're cute.
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"So how am I supposed to do it, baby?" Jordan claps her hands and you smile at how eager she sounds to help.
"You're gonna want to section it off. Do like... eight parts of hair. That'll make literally every step after this easier. Then you're gonna comb the hair from the bottom, 'kay?"
"Got it."
Jordan starts the process of parting your hair, careful and slow. Fingers sectioning off eight chunks of hair that she keeps apart with the silky hair ties you hand her over your shoulder.
"You sure you don't want me to comb it, Jordie?" You ask Jordan.
"I'll be gentle, don't worry. You always say your shoulders hurt at the end of wash day. Which is crazy, because I've seen what you can bench. I've got you, baby." She spritzes extra detangler spray on each of the parts she just made.
You move around slightly, a little sore already from sitting still between her legs for so long, but smiling to yourself nonetheless. A pillow is suddenly shoved into your face and you lean away, confused.
"Sit on this one instead. It'll be better." Jordan says.
You switch out the pillows and tilt your head back to look at her. "Why're you always right? Is that your kink?"
"No, my kink is bossing you around." Jordan smirks and leans down to give you a kiss. Despite the awkward angle you can't help trying to deepen the contact. The feeling of her soft lips sliding against yours, firm but gentle, is always irresistible.
She hums and gives you a playful nip before pulling away. "Don't start something we can't finish."
"Who says we can't?" You shoot back, staring up at her.
"You will be pissed an hour from now if you glance at your phone and we haven't made any progress." Jordan runs her thumb along your bottom lip before pushing your head forward.
"Who says it will take an hour?"
"I do. If we start, I'm not stopping." Jordan's voice dips seductively and a line of tension runs up the length of your spine.
You smack her thigh for teasing you, "Shut up."
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"Is this comfortable?" Jordan frowns, staring at the angle your head has to be at to fit in the bowl of the sink.
"No, but this is the best angle this chair can get me to." You say. Usually you just wash in the shower, but since Jordan is helping the sink makes more sense.
Jordan stands, scowling at how uncomfortable you seem. Suddenly he grins, "Baby! Make a chair with your shields. Something that leans."
You were getting a lot better with being able to make complex shapes, with less concentration. You stand up from the chair you'd dragged from the common room. Jordan pulls it out of the way and gives you an encouraging thumbs up.
It takes you a minute, but you conjure a shield that resembles a salon chair and the both of you let out identical cries of delight.
Jordan pushes you to sit down with a kiss on your forehead. "That's my fucking girl. Tell me if the temperature is too hot."
Jordan washes your hair with the perfect amount of pressure and thoroughness. He's nearly rhythmic in his methodical cleaning. You didn't realize your eyes had fluttered closed until you hear him laugh. You open one eye to glare at him playfully, knowing he won't get soap in them.
"What's so funny?"
"You're like a cat. You gonna purr for me, baby?" He smirks.
"If you keep going like that, yeah. Or I'll fall asleep. Please don't make me fall asleep. I'll fall on my ass." You say.
"I'll endeavor to make the rest of the wash as unpleasant as possible."
He does not do that. And at one point you do fall asleep. Jordan catches you before you can actually fall. 'Thank God for Supe reflexes', you both think. You spend the rest of the wash with your eyes wide open and Jordan laughing at you.
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"Did we put too much?" Jordan asks, dabbing at another drip of oil and conditioner down your brow.
"No, this is typical. The hair has to be saturated. It's dripping because the oil is you know... getting hot and even more liquid-y." You say, eyeing the episode of Property Brother's you'd both decided on. "Hm. I think that woman should be put to death."
Jordan was keeping vigilant about dabbing at the sides of your face. You'd been in charge of one side, at first. But Jordan seemed to have a sixth sense for when the other side was dripping as well, and kept interrupting you before you could get to any trickles of oil. You'd given up and just started narrating the show for her as she wasn't taking her eyes off the line of your brow.
"Why? What did she do?" Jordan dabs again.
"She wants to put up a fence that blocks the view of the historical house that she did not have to buy if she wanted a fence so bad." You roll your eyes.
"Is the city gonna let her?"
"No."
"Haha. 500k down the drain." Jordan cackles.
"Anti-gentrification win!" You hold out your fist for a fist-bump and Jordan obediently obliges, oil soaked rag still held in her fist.
A comfortable silence falls over you two, besides the noise of the portable hair dryer.
"I really think we put too much, baby." Jordan mutters, dabbing again.
"I have been doing this since I was twelve, Jordan!"
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"Play the video again, one speed slower this time." Jordan's eyes are glued to your phone.
You're sitting between his legs again, cushioned by the (superior) pillow of his choosing. You were trying to decide on a simple hair style when Jordan saw a picture of Mini Twists and got excited to see you in them.
("You've already seen me in mini twists, Jordie. What are you talking about?"
"You weren't my girlfriend the last time you wore them though! Now you are, and I get to look at you as much as I want."
So that had decided that.)
"Okay, I think I got it. 'M gonna start with a braid base, without making the parts too big, then start twisting the hair with two strands, and that will make it last longer, right?"
"Right." You smile at how focused Jordan sounds.
They're hot when they're in the zone. You just didn't think they'd get so into helping you with your hair. But you should have known, really. Acts of service paired with their inner perfectionist? You're completely relaxed at this point. You know Jordan won't have you walking out of your room looking crazy, come hell or high water.
"Is this okay?" Jordan shows you a picture of the back of your head, three rows of twists done.
You gasp, snatching the phone, "That's my head?"
"Uh... yes?" Jordan answers slowly.
"The back of my head? The head on my body?"
"Should I start over?"
"Fuck you! These are almost better than mine. Who's hair are you playing around in when I'm not here, Jordan LI?"
"Stop using my fucking government name." Jordan tilts your head back to look at him with a gentle grip on your neck, grinning down at you. "You play too fucking much. You sure they're good, princess? It's okay if I need to redo them."
"I'm gonna give you orgasms that will make you lose brain cells."
"Baby!" Jordan laughs, rolling his eyes. "I'm serious. Do any of them need redoing?"
"The first row is really fucking good for a beginner but the second row is damn near perfect." You say.
"I'll redo the first row then." Jordan kisses your temple before moving you to face forward again.
"I said they were good!" You protest.
"But the second row is better. I want the whole thing to look good. Don't want you feeling self conscious cause I fucked up the style, y'know." Jordan mumbles.
You tilt your head back to look at him, ignoring him sucking his teeth (a habit he picked up from you) at you moving.
"I love you, Jordie. Thank you for helping me today." You coo.
You watch his face go red with a grin. He grins back, leaning down to give you a gentle kiss. When he tries to pull away too soon you whine, holding him close by the hair at the nape of his neck.
"Wanna kiss you. You're sweet." You breathe the words against his lips, insistently continuing the caress.
He sighs, smitten, and let's you lead for a moment. Hand finding it's way back to your neck and tightening just enough to make you gasp. Still, he pulls away too quickly.
"I'm gonna fuck you up." You scowl at him.
"The only thing you're gonna fuck up is your neck, brat. This is a horrible angle for you." Jordan's smile is so soft at the edges it's your turn to blush.
"Speak for yourself."
"No, I'm too busy speaking on behalf of your neck."
"Well, I'm speaking on behalf of my-"
"Pussy?"
"I was going to say raging hormones but that's a lot more to the point, yeah. Or maybe I was going to say something romantic. You ever think of that, Jordie? Huh?"
"Were you going to say something romantic?" Jordan hums.
"No."
"Let me do your hair in peace." Jordan turns you forward again with a laugh.
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"Turn this way." Jordan instructs, snapping another picture.
"I don't know whether you're worse than an Instagram hair stylist or a Mom." You ponder, words barely audible because your girlfriend is scary.
"Shut up and smile." Jordan scowls.
As if engraved into your genetic code the words make you do just that. You suffer through another 20 pictures being taken before you say enough is enough.
Jordan happily shows you the pictures, as if you hadn't seen yourself in the mirror just a minute ago. Or ever. The grin on her face so wide it looks like it hurts.
"You like it, baby?" Jordan asks again.
"It looks so good, Jordie. It looks like I paid someone honestly."
"Yeah?"
"Yeah." You drape your arms around her shoulders. "How's this angle?"
"For what?" Jordan tilts her head to the side, puzzled.
"For kissing. Since you were so worried about the angle before."
Jordan scoffs, but she's the one to pull you in. She doesn't pull away this time.
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A/N: i needed reader to have a goofball vibe because i have a goofball vibe. if you enjoyed this fic consider reblogging, leaving a reply, or an anonymous ask saying you enjoyed it! a writers fuel is engagement. xoxoxo
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microwavetoaster-selfships · 8 months ago
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Send me good wishes yall. I'm going to try and work on some late work when I get home but I'm chronically bad at doing that without an energy drink but I'm not ready for the impending doom of selling my soul to energy drinks so I can function
Uuhhhhhhhhh I accidentally went on a tangent and there's a whole vent in the tags oopsies
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starlightazriel · 3 months ago
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bee 8
desc: modern day bestfriends>lovers azriel au (fem reader)
warnings: lots of time jumps, rhys being rhys, arguing/angst, lying, az being unhinged in vegas (leave my bby alone he's not used to serious relationships), reader being insecure , SMUT ! (oral, az eating the booty like groceries (we been over this guys hes a freak), raw dogging, soft dom, self gratification,vibrator, squirting, spanking, cream pie), fluff, drug/alcohol addiction
A/N: IM SO SORRY THIS TOOK ME SO LONG MY LIFE IS V V MESSY AND UNHINGED ALSO THIS ISNT FULLY PROOF READ
MOOD FOR THE BEGINNING OF THIS
wc: 5.9k
other parts can be found on my masterlist under azriel
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eight
"I got us a massive suite at the four seasons for our trip this weekend," Rhys is grinning while showing Cassian a photo of what he had booked for them. Azriel suppressed the urge to roll his eyes, only Rhys would drop that big of a bag on a weekend work-stay, they were supposed to be location scouting. He didn't want to be ungrateful, but him and Bee were in their honeymoon phase... Everything was just going right, everything except the fact that Rhys wanted to move him hundreds of miles away.
"This weekend?" Azriel grimaces, leaning against the reception desk in the shop. Kat had gone home already and it was just Rhys, Cass and Azriel left. "What if I don't want to uproot my entire life here and move to Vegas?" he asks then, Cass shifts uncomfortably on his feet, looking between his two best friends.
Rhys' jaw flexed and he leaned back, tilting his chin up at Azriel in that power tripping way that he did so often. Azriels jaw flexed, his hands balling up at his sides as he stared Rhys down, not shying away from his intimidating frame. He knew challenging Rhys never ended well, sometimes he just couldn't help himself.
"You do realize that you have a contract, right Azriel? A contract that you signed, a contract that includes relocation if I see fit," Rhys voice is cool and unwavering as he assesses Azriel. "Maybe, if you had been sober while reading the contract, you would have known that was included," Rhys eyes narrowed, the tension in Azriels jaw grew, his temper flaring. "And maybe if you had been sober when we were talking about this trip weeks ago, you would have remembered that we were going this weekend to scout out a few potential new spaces," Rhys tone was unwavering, Cass winced behind him, it was always his job to keep the peace, usually between the three of them it was almost always Rhys and Az butting heads.
"Fuck this, I got dinner plans to get ready for," Azriels voice was a near growl now, and he didn't even bother to say good bye to either of his closest friends before he left them in the shop with a slam of the front door, the bells rattling at the top as it slammed shut.
His annoyance and Rhys' sheer entitlement had him needing to take the edge off. Az loved Rhys, of course he did, he was basically his brother- but that didnt mean they always agreed. Azriel tried not to think about Rhys' jabs at his sobriety while he took a quick sniff from his vile before heading home.
-
With Bee, it was just easy. Azriel didn't seem to have the same issues he did in the past with other women, being faithful to her came easy. He guessed it was because he always had been loyal to her in a sense, since they were just kids.
The past weeks had been a type of bliss that Azriel had never known, a different kind of high than the one he got from his drug of choice. They were fucking constantly, waking up together every morning, going on dates whenever they had time, fuck, he had even posted her which he had never done for anyone else... It was a picture of her at the beach, grinning so brightly it made his chest feel tight because he put that smile on her face. ive been so blind, was his only explanation under the photo.
And still, he wasn't able to bring himself to tell her about Rhys' Vegas plans for the next year. Everything was too perfect right now. Granted it had only been a few weeks since their first date, but he just didn't wanna mess everything up so soon, he wanted to live in this perfect little bubble just a little longer.
"Az? You with me?" she giggles softly, her dirty martini pulled to her lips, her eyes glowing as she looked at him from under dark lashes. "I think I want to get the vodka pappardelle," she places her glass down again and points to the menu.
"Yeah, whatever you want baby, sorry," he ran his finger through his hair, leaning back into his seat, flicking his eyes back down to the menu. "Just- I know it's last minute, I'm going on a little Vegas trip this weekend with Rhys and Cass," he waited a second before looking up and studied her face, absentmindedly messing with the straw in his own drink.
"A Vegas trip?" Bees eyebrows draw together, her attention was already on him, the menu forgotten, he swallowed. "Like Las Vegas?" she asks, a little more slowly this time. "Why are you guys going out there?" the concern, the uncertainty in her eyes made Azriels gut wrench. He knew he should tell her everything now, tell her that the possibility of him living there next year was becoming less of a possibility and more of a reality. Sure, when she was done with school, she could be a nurse anywhere... But that was still a ways away.
"Boys trip," he shrugs, and it wasn't exactly a lie, it just wasn't the full truth. She looked back at him skeptically, and he knew he had to change the subject soon.
"Boys trip, huh?" she leans back, raising an eyebrow skeptically. In the past- boys trips were really only meant for single Az.
"I'll be good," Az flashes her a smile, he knew he may have used the wrong choice of wording. A year ago, a boys trip to Vegas would have meant unlimited blow, maybe even a threesome, hooking up with randoms, losing all of his money. "Gonna gamble for sure though," he sips his drink, she's still looking at him with a skeptical look as if she knew there was more to the story. Luckily for Az the server came back for the rest of their order.
"Have we made some decisions?" she asks, looking between the two of them, Az only jerked his chin toward Bee, he liked the smile it put on her face to be able to choose everything for them so they could try it together.
"Yes we are going to share the duck pizza and the vodka pappardelle, you want oysters Az?" she lifts her eyes from the menu to look back at Azriel, he smirks and glances up at the server.
"Yeah, we'll start with a dozen," he shrugs and the waitress beams, making sure she had everything correct before leaving the table. "Thank you," he adds, but his eyes are back on Bee.
"So boys trip to Vegas, kinda last minute huh?" she quirks her brow again, leaning forward, her elbows on the table, Azriel tried not to let his eyes settle for too long on her breasts as they spilled slightly out of her top. Of course he wasnt lucky enough that she'd already forgotten about it.
"Yeah, I mean, I knew about it.. Just forgot," he shrugs easily, nudging her foot under the table, her eyes are hazy but he can still see that skeptical glint in them. He didn't want to lie, or leave parts of the truth out... But he also wanted to have a good night before he had to leave in a couple days, plus, she was working the rest of the week until he was gone anyway.
"Interesting," she murmurs, rubbing her finger against the base of her glass. "Anyway, you better bring something back for me," she shrugs before taking another sip from her martini.
"I wouldn't dream of coming back without something for my girl," he licks his lips, nudging her foot gently again under the table, her cheeks warm at his words and she rolls her eyes playfully at him. Az knew he was good at distracting her, though he wasn't sure if that was really a good thing or not.
"Yeah, yeah," she laughs softly, the sound made Azriels chest swell. "Thank you so much," she smiles softly as the runner sets the oysters down on the table between them.
"Can I grab you anything else?" the boy flashes her a cheeky grin that Azriel doesn't miss, he clears his throat as if to remind him he was sitting there across from her.
"More lemons," Az says boredly but there was an edge of annoyance in his tone, making the boys head snap to him and he blushed slightly, nodding his head. He didn't need more lemons, he just wanted to be difficult, the level of jealousy he felt when anyone even spoke to her was something he'd never experienced.
"Oh, of course, I'll be right back," he swallows, before running off back to the kitchen. Azriels eyes snap back to Bee, who's looking at him with pursed lips.
"Azriel, lay off the poor kid he's like eighteen," she shakes her head slightly, he noted that her martini was almost gone now, she was definitely feeling it. He only shrugs, smirking at her, stretching his legs out under the table so they were more than in her space, the skin of her bare calf pressed against his pants, she's nibbling on her lip, her eyes growing darker with lust. He loved how easy it was for him to get her going.
"Here you are, enjoy," hes back quickly and he places the small dish of lemons in front of Azriel.
"We will," Az only nods, Bee makes sure to utter a rushed thank you to him, shooting Azriel another look. "Don't look at me like that, lemme see you swallow," he smirks suggestively and she lets out a little puff of air her jaw dropping slightly but she couldn't help but smile.
"Azriel, don't be gross," she giggled quietly but she was still squeezing lemon onto the first oyster, he watched as the juice dripped off of her fingertips and she picked up the oyster, her eyes meeting his.
"That's it," he murmured, watching her tip her head back slightly and open her lips, her cheeks warmed at the gravelly tone of his voice. "Good practice for when I make you swallow something else tonight," he smirked, sipping from his drink while he watched her rest the shell on her lower lip, he watched her throat bob as she swallowed, humming softly in approval.
"Mmm those are good ones," she giggled softly, turning the shell over and placing it back on the ice.
"Youre a good one," his lips twitched in a sheepish smirk and she held his gaze, her own full of so much love it made his heart rate pick up.
"Az Im worried about you, cheesy much? youre definitely going soft on me," she grinned so brightly it made heat crawl up the back of his neck and onto his cheeks.
His cock was aching in his pants, he couldn't wait to get her back home. His jaw flexed before he muttered "you're going to be my end I swear."
-
"I should have stopped after the first two," I giggled quietly as I stumbled into my bedroom, kicking my heels off behind me, Azriel was right behind me, I could almost feel his eyes burning into my backside.
"I told you," he says in that low husky tone he often used with me these days, it was laced with so much need it made my head spin. "Anyway, Im glad now because it will give you courage for our reenactment."
"Reenactment?" I ask, turning to look at him now my brow slightly furrowed. "Of what?" I ask curiously, taking each of my earrings off, I had obviously been wearing the ones from Az, I had every day since he had gifted them to me. I had learned that he liked to get rough often, I didnt want to chance losing them so I tucked them away carefully in my jewelry box.
"Of the day I walked in on you," his voice was so calm and commanding it made my toes curl, my breath hitched, a warm tingling sensation spreading throughout my pussy. My cheeks warmed at the thought.
"Az- I can't..." I breathed out, my heart rate picking up at the thought of just purposefully touching myself in front of him.
"I didnt ask if you could. You will," he says, his voice so sure, and he was right. Knowing what he could do to me... Anything he told me to do, Id do it. Especially when he sounded like that. "I'll give you about five minutes to get situated, ten if youre lucky but I don't think I can be that patient. Im going to show you what I wanted to do to you," he adds, a small smirk tugging at the corner of his lips. I was already moving before my brain could even process. My throat bobbed, my cheeks embarrassingly red as I retrieved the toy I had used that day from my top drawer and I left him alone in my room. It was annoying how easily he could render me speechless these days.
I slipped out of my dress and my panties, leaving them both on his bedroom floor, I didn't dare look at myself in the full length mirror he had. I let myself fall back onto his bed, inhaling his cedary scent just like I did that day he walked in on me.
My heart was racing as I spread my legs and placed my rose toy on my clit. I let out a small huff my eyes on Azriels open bedroom door as I let the toy suction softly to my pussy. My hand traveled up, caressing my skin gently before settling on my nipple, I rolled it gently between my fingertips. My breath hitched when he appeared in the door way, looking handsome as ever, my cheeks warmed at the sight of him. How had I gotten so lucky?
"That's my baby," Azriel chuckled darkly as he leaned against the door frame to his bedroom. I moaned softly when our eyes met, my cheeks turning pink. "Now if I had been bold enough that day, I would have got down on my knees like I'm about to now,"
"Az," I whimpered softly in desperation, the need for him starting to outweigh my nerves. It was hard to want to hide when he made me feel so sexy. A single look was enough to do me in.
"Shh baby," he hums softly and in one fluid motion, pulls me to the edge of the bed and slowly drops to his knees. I whimper softly as he brushes the sides of his face against my inner thighs, inhaling my scent before spreading my legs. I gasped softly my hand shaking slightly as I held my toy between my legs.
Azriel sucked gently and bit at the sensitive skin on my inner thighs, a guttural moan escaped my lips at the contrasting feeling. The sting of his little nibbles mixed with the soft buzz and suction from my toy had my back arching up. "Please Az," I gasped softly, I knew there would be little bruises peppered over my delicate skin.
"Please what baby?" he breathed out, his breath hot against my sensitive skin. My head was spinning, I didn't know if it was from the alcohol I'd drank at dinner or from the way he touched me, the way he took control, guided me. It just felt so right, so perfect.
"Please," I let a heavy breath pass through parted lips, my heart beating rapidly against my chest. "Please taste me, I need you," I begged softly, gasping as he pushed my legs up, the delicious scrape of his rough hands against my skin sending heat slithering down my spine.
"That's my good girl," he licked his lips at the sight of me, my legs spread and up in the air, bared to him except for my clit, the vibrator still buzzing around it. I was already so close, my cunt pulsating with need for him. My breath hitched when I felt his mouth on me, the slow lazy roll of his tongue on my second hole sending stars dancing in my eyes. I hummed softly, tossing my head back and letting my eyes squeeze shut, goosebumps raising all over my skin.
"F-fuck Az," I breathed out, the new sensation making my mind go numb. His thumbs pressed harder into the backs of my thighs, I arched my back slightly, gasping again for breath as he circled his tongue around and around my opening. He held my legs open as they threatened to close, quivering pathetically underneath his touch. It was only a matter of seconds before I was cumming, his name ringing out through the room, making him moan against me. My vibrator fell from my hand, gently hitting his cheek before rolling onto the floor next to him. I panted, my hips wriggling underneath him as he sucked the sensitive skin between my pussy and my ass before covering my entire cunt with his mouth. "Ohh my- fuck-" each word came out in a pathetic broken moan as he shook his head between my legs. I couldn't hold it back anymore and I was squirting all over his face, he moaned against me, pulling off of my pussy with a soft sucking sound.
He gently licked me down from my high, my body jerking with the aftershocks of my intense orgasms. "Damn baby I didnt know you could do that," his eyes are so dark and hazy with lust as he kisses back up my body, hes back on his feet now, hovering over me. "My little sprinkler," he teases before biting down softly on my nipple, I yelped softly, my body jerking.
"Az, I need you so fucking bad," I breathed out my eyes meeting with his. He grinned in that lazy way he did his face still glistening with my cum. He looked so damn happy, it made my heart sing. It had been a bit of a rare sight these last couple years... But these past few weeks? He had been nothing but happy, it made my chest swell knowing I was the cause of that happiness.
"I was gonna put my cock in your mouth first but since you've been so good we'll save it for later," he stood up straight, looking down at me hungrily, my legs laying lazily over the edge of the bed now. He undid his pants, his eyes never leaving me as he dropped them to the floor. "Lay on your stomach," he commanded, his voice gravelly. He watched me readjust myself, cursing quietly under his breath as I lay on my stomach across his bed before him.
I let out a moan when his hand unexpectedly connected with my ass with a loud slapping sound, the sting sending my toes curling. He gently lifted me up, his arm wrapping around my torso and lifting up with ease. He slid a pillow underneath to prop me up perfectly. Azriel gently rubbed his rough fingers over the tender spot he had smacked, humming in approval. "Ive wanted to do that since I watched you walk away from me in the hall that day," he admits, only earning a whimper in response from me. I was so ready for him to fuck me into nothing.
I shivered as Azriel slowly slid his fingertips over my shoulders and down my arms gently wrapping his large scarred fingers around the tips of his fingers pressing into the insides of my elbows as he pulled my arms behind my back. He used one hand to pin my wrists to my lower back, I whimpered softly, begging him for his cock again as his hand tightened on my wrists, his large hands finding no trouble.
He used his other hand to guide his cock toward my pussy, not bothering with a condom. If it was one thing about Az, we were fucking raw, every time. He slid his tip over my slick cunt, teasing gently before sinking into me, cursing softly under his breath as he did. "Yes please fuck me, please," I begged desperately, the side of my face pressed into his bed.
"That's my girl, so wet and tight for me," his fingers were gripping the bed beneath me, his mouth almost by my ear now as he moved in and out of me his cock filled me up over and over.
I moaned his name again, arching my back up for him, he hissed under his breath and spanked me again, I felt my ass jiggle under his big hand, the sting made my body jerk. "I love how you fuck me," I whimpered softly, feeling like a puddle beneath him, he still my hands pinned to my back, he let out a low groan from deep in his throat, up on his knees as he slammed his hips over and over against my ass.
I let out another broken moan, his considerable length dragging over my g spot every time he thrusted himself into me, I couldnt hold it in anymore and I came all over his cock with my third orgasm of the night, stars danced behind my eyes my body tensing underneath him. I couldnt stop the scream that left my lips as he continued fucking me, cursing again softly and squeezing my tender and red flesh from his spanks. "Ohh yesss Az..." I moaned again, his thrusts lost their rhythm as he grew closer, his breath heavy and erratic behind me.
"Mmm baby you're so fucking sexy," he breathed out before letting out a low guttural groan. "I'm gonna fill up that pretty little cunt," he grunted in my ear and with a few more thrusts I cried out softly at the feeling of his thick ropes of cum spilling into my pussy. So damn good. "Fuck," he breathed slowly pulling his hands from my wrists, my arms fell back at my sides and I whimpered softly as he slowly pulled his cock from my pussy. He swore again under his breath, "Stay just like that," he muttered, leaning over and grabbing his phone from the bedside table, and I felt him slap his still semi hard cock on my ass cheek. "For later," I could hear the grin in his voice as he snapped a picture of his gleaming cock against my ass. I just whimpered softly in response, my body feeling limp my mind numb. He tossed his phone aside on the bed and flipped me over onto my back and placed a soft kiss to my lips.
I had been waiting to get fucked like this for years. None of my past lovers had ever been able to compare to the way that Az made me feel, though if things hadn't gone the way they did with Az I probably would have ended up giving Eris another chance.
"You're so damn good at fucking," I huffed out, looking up at him with hazy satisfaction. "It's not fair," he just laughed and leaned down, pressing a soft kiss to my forehead and then my lips. I let my eyes flutter shut again as he tucked my hair behind my ear before he muttered "let's get you cleaned up baby."
-
"Send me lots of pictures," Bee flashes her biggest grin, hugging Azriel so tightly. He smiled down at her, squeezing her back and pressing a soft kiss to her forehead. He was glad she had brought them to the air port, it gave him just a little extra time with her.
"I promise baby I will, I'm gonna miss you," he rubs small circles into her back, savoring the last few minutes they had together before he was on the plane.
"Be good okay?" she drops her voice lower, Rhys and Cass were standing off to the side waiting for him while he said his last goodbyes. He could tell she didn't want them to hear this part. "Just like- stick to drinking and bud okay? Just don't want you to buy something without knowing what it is for sure first.." she mumbles softly, biting down gently on her lip.
Az sighs quietly, pulling away slightly at her words, he knew she meant well but he couldn't help but get the tiniest bit annoyed. "I'm gonna be fine, chill off me," he chuckled quietly but leaned down and pressed one more kiss to her lips, because he know she was only saying that because she cared about him... She had never exactly supported his extracurricular activities. "I'll be good, and you better be good too," he warns playfully, but there was a slight edge in his tone so she would know he did mean it. "You're mine now, I don't want to hear about any red headed visitors," he raises an eyebrow and she pursed her lips, glaring lightly at him.
"Azriel. You know I would never-"
"I know," he cuts her off, brushing a lock of her hair behind her ear. "I gotta go baby, text me when you're home safe alright? I'll text you when I land," he opens his arms one last time to crush her in good bye hug, she hums softly tucking her chin into his neck and inhaling his scent.
"I love you," she mumbles softly, he just grinned and hugged her even tighter, he kissed the top of her head, not daring to utter it back yet. Some things he just wasn't ready for.
He had told her he loved her dozens of times, but he knew the next time he said those words to her, they would carry a whole different weight.
-
It was evening on the second day when they finally made it out onto the strip, the first day had been filled with scouting out locations. Rhys had already signed a lease, much to his own surprise, he thought he'd have to come back a few times before finding the perfect spot for their new shop. The signing was followed by a very late dinner and a few bottles of champagne before they retreated back to the massive suite Rhys had got for them.
Azriel had to admit, he liked it here. He was having a blast with his brothers, and he hadn't wanted to admit it before but he could see himself living here. He knew this would be a level up for him, he would make way more money out here... Plans were already stirring in his head for how he would convince Bee to move out here with him, she would have to transfer schools, quit her job... He knew that was a lot to ask. He couldn't imagine not living with her anymore...
"Sin city baby!!! AZ! Get outta your head man do you see this shit?" Cass had been excited since the moment they stepped off the plane yesterday, they were all quite fucked up now. They had been gambling all night, winning and losing money and had now settled in one of the nicest clubs Azriel had ever been in. There was half naked bottle girls everywhere, and of course Rhys had got them a VIP section with bottle service included.
"Oh I see it," Azriel laughs softly, catching the eyes of the bottle girl who was leaning very close to him as she poured shots for the three of them. She was definitely giving him the eyes. Azriel had to look away then, turning his head back toward Cass. "I'm just fucked up," against Bees wishes, the first thing he had done this morning was purchase a gram.
"Better hope that shit didn't have fenty in it," Rhys turns his head to look at Az, who rolls his eyes in response.
"It's doesn't," he snaps back, before downing another shot, he didn't even know how many he'd had at this point. "It's just good shit you want a line?" he raises his eyebrows, there had been a time the three of them did this all together. Az just never grew out of it...
"I'll take one man, I'm in fucking Vegas!" Cass shouts, earning a laugh from Az who simply passed the little white bag over. This was one thing about Vegas he liked, the freedom of just being able to do a line in the club and no one even batted a single eye because it was Vegas, and obviously one of them had money if they had a VIP here.
"Some day the two of you will grow up," Rhys sighs before beckoning the bottle girl over for the list of bottles they could purchase.
"Get the Clase Rhys we are celebrating!" Cass voice boomed out and he shot to his feet, shaking his head with the effect the drugs had on him. Azriel just laughed and snatched his little bag back from him.
"Easy," Az laughs again, catching the bottle girls eye again, he didn't mean to, she was fucking staring. She flashed him a seductive little grin before retreating to get the bottle that Rhys had ordered.
He knew a few months ago he would have flirted a little and ended up taking her back to the room. He wasn't single anymore though, and the pain it would cause Bee just for him to get his nut off for a night while he was on his boys trip, it just wasn't worth it. Plus, he needed her to know he wasn't that guy anymore. He wanted to be everything for her.
-
"No fucking way," my phone tightened in my hand as I stared down at it, Kat and I were out to brunch, she figured we should have a little girls weekend while the boys were away. So finally we were able to do something since I had Sunday off, Az wouldn't be landing back home until late tonight.
"What is it?" Kat asks, lifting her eyes from her plate.
"Go look at fucking Cassian's instagram," I said through gritted teeth as I swiped through each photo from their apparent escapades lastnight.
There was my Az, my Az... Grinning wickedly, leaning over, face smushed between the tits of two bottle girls who were wearing nothing but lingerie to cover their most intimate bits. He had his arms around each of them, a drink nearly spilling over one of their shoulders. His pupils were blown out, clearly he hadn't listened to me about staying away from drugs out there. My heart was sinking further with the scroll of each photo. There was another snap shot of him dancing with one of them, she was bent over, her ass shaking on him, one of his hands loosely on her waist.
"Oh fuuuck.." Kat drew out the word, her eyes widening as she looked down at the photos on her phone.
"Yeah fuck is right," I locked my phone, tossing it on the table next to me before downing the rest of my mimosa. "I fucking knew it, he hasn't changed even a little bit- As soon as he said boys trip I-"
"Boys trip?" she asked, drawing her eyebrows together. "That's what he told you?" she asks, biting her lip and gnawing on it a bit. What the fuck did she know?
"Kat...?" I say slowly, meeting her eyes, her cheeks are flushed as if she had just said something she knew she shouldn't have.
"I- I'm sure Az is going to tell you- I don't think it's my place to-"
"Just spit it out," I was starting to get more angry, the gnawing feeling of shame starting to eat at my stomach. "What do you know?!" I demanded and she loosed a breath, leaning back in her seat.
"Bee- I swear I thought he told you- Please don't tell him it was me that said anything I'm sure he's just waiting for-"
"Just spit it out Kat," I repeat, an impatient edge to my tone. What had he kept from me?
"It was a location scouting trip- For-for the new shop that Rhys is opening up with Az and Cass in Vegas," her voice is soft now, and she's almost wincing as she waits for my reaction.
Just like that... It felt like everything had been some sick game to pass the time. My stomach turned, I felt like I was going to lose everything I had eaten on our little brunch date.
"I'm so fucking stupid," I breathed softly, fighting back the tears that threatened to spill from my eyes. I really thought I knew him better than that... I never expected him to pull some shit like this. To keep something this big from me.
-
Azriel groaned loudly as he rolled over, the silky sheets slipping from his skin as he reached for his phone. He smiled, noticing the few notifications he had from Bee, his face quickly fell, and he was sitting up straight in an instant rubbing his eyes.
good morning!! can't wait to see you tonight
Normal, but the message below that one, and the notification that she stopped sharing her location? Definitely not normal. They had been sharing location for years, basically since it had become an option.
going to visit my family for a couple days i'll talk to you when i get back.
He quickly typed out a response.
everything okay baby?
He knew he had forgotten to face time her lastnight before he went to bed, but he was so fucked up he couldn't even remember getting home. And it had to have been almost 5 am when they had gotten back to the resort. She had asked him before they left to face time her before he went to sleep both nights, surely she couldn't be that mad over that, could she?
As he padded into the little kitchen that was built into the suite, his eyes were glued to his phone. He opened instagram next, and his stomach twisted slightly when he pressed her story and it was one of those dumb quotes girls tended to post after getting dumped about never really being able to know someone.
Fuck what did I do? his face had gone a little pale, the contents of the michelin star dinner they had lastnight and all the alcohol he had consumed bubbled in his stomach, he was racking his brain, trying to piece together the night, he couldn't really remember much of anything once they had left the casino and got to the club.
All he had to do was scroll down to the top post on his feed and his face paled. "Cass are you fucking dumb?" he's in Cassians part of the suite before he can even think shaking him awake.
"What the fuck man?" Cass groans, rolling over and rubbing the sleep from his eyes. Rhys was behind them now, he had been up for an hour or two already.
"You saw the instagram post didn't you?" Rhys chuckles from behind him, holding his coffee cup in hand, leaning against the door frame.
"You think this shits funny?" He demands, whirling around to direct his attention to Rhys. As angry as he was at Cass, he knew it was only his fault that he had bought coke and got completely black out shit faced drunk. "Man fuck both of you," he growls and turns on his heel, storming to the bathroom and slamming the door behind him.
-
a/n: sorry but if it's one thing abt me yk i love drama
taglist: @smalljasper289 @cynthiesjmxazrielslover @scorpioriesling @userxs-blog @lilah-asteria @abadfantasybook @judeduartewannbe @lindsayscottagebythesea @velarisdusk @serxndipity-ipity-blog @julesvanslutta
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pumpkinbxtch · 6 months ago
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hi! I love your Apollo fics sm can I please request a fic we’re the reader is Percy’s older sister and she finds out there’s like a prophecy of her marrying Apollo and then like they eventually meet and fall and love and then what there marriage is like
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𓇼 the sun & the sea 𓇼 〰✷〰
— apollo / lester x daughter of poseidon!reader
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— part i | part ii | part iii | part iv |
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☆ radiostar is playin': hot rod by dayglow...!
summary: There is a prophecy waiting for you to listen to it and although it may not be something you expect or consider possible. You know what they say about prophecies…they can't fail to come true.
warnings: none BUT long read, literally. got out of hand and i couldn't stop writing. that's bad? oh, fuck me, i'm sorry. a/n: i appreciate your request, thank you (although I think I changed it a little, sorry). HEAR ME OUT I feel like I owe a lot of love to those who love Apollo, so that's why I didn't entertain the idea of ​​making this long. Hope you like I know it's long, but I promise I did my best to make it bearable and fun, I swear. 😭
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“The sea and the sun are not far away as they look…”
They told you to stay away from the attic of The Big House, but they never told you why.
“Only he can go up”, they said, and it seemed stupid to you because he was your younger brother; you were supposed to protect him.
“It's very dangerous”, they told you while Annabeth went up, even though you were a couple of years older than her.
“Only if you lead some quest, but…” but no, because as the years went by, they made sure to remind you of your place. They told you that you were powerful, smart, and capable, because, yes, you were Poseidon's firstborn, but not the chosen one. That was Percy, your brother. Did it hurt? Yes, as an older sister, you tend to aspire to greatness and be an example, but you didn't die; you got over it.
“What does it matter? Less work for me” you said as you watched your brother's back on all the missions. Anyway, you ended up stuck in his destiny.
“His destiny. But then, what's mine?” you wondered. Then, when you took a step near Rachel Dare's cave, they stopped you too.
“It's–”
“Dangerous.” You completed the familiar phrase with a look of disgust, avoiding Chiron's eyes. He just looked at you with pity, thinking to himself that if you went in there, you could cause more trouble for your father or Olympus… Or everyone; it would be a war among all the Olympians, something they didn't need with Titan Kronos already on their heels.
Dionysus gave you his typical mocking smile, the same one that made you want to grab the can of Diet Coke and throw it right at his disgusting Christmas-reindeer-red nose.
“It would be so interesting, but we don't need it,” he said as he dragged you away from Rachel with Chiron.
You weren't stupid, you knew there was some good reason. But damn, those fossils were sneaky and never let you get to your redheaded companion, who also avoided you like the plague. Between those two things, you never managed to achieve it. Even less so after you ended up fighting on the Argo II with your new friends, straight from real Greece.
Oh, man, if you had thought Kronos was a damn old grump, Gaea was an old ball-buster. You didn't even have time to think about your future when you didn't know if you had one.
After the second war is when you started to throw in the towel about the future. You realized that the last thing you wanted to know at that moment was whether you would have to fight against twelve more Titans, return to Tartarus, or travel to Alaska again.
New Rome became your new home, and you only waited for Percy to catch up with you along with everyone else. That is, until you returned home to pack new things and didn't find your brother studying just as he should be.
— Mom? — You asked when she came back from shopping.
She gave you that look, and you cursed.
— Relax, he'll be back in a while; he just went to drop off Apollo or well, now he's Lester because apparently he's no longer a god but Zeus…
— Wow. Wait, what?
As a hero of Olympus, touching, seeing, or talking to the gods was never impossible for you; in fact, it was much more usual for your taste, and although you had been through too much already, that was new. So, you found yourself immediately traveling to Long Island Sound on the back of a Pegasus, looking for your brother. You wouldn't let Apollo, Lester, or whatever he called himself now take your brother away to distract him with his godly stuff that surely wouldn't lead to anything good.
— Where's Percy?! — You shouted in the dining hall, making the campers flinch.
Chiron got up from his seat, and from there, he smiled at you, but it only put you in a worse mood.
— Dear, it's been a long journey. Please, sit and eat with us.
You lowered your head without taking your eyes off Chiron and tightened the dagger on your belt. There was no reason for it, you knew, but you couldn't help feeling that fury after knowing everything you had been through. Percy deserved a break.
— Where's my brother? — The pause between words made the campers squirm in their uncomfortable seats. They had heard about you, about everyone. to be exact, in the third lesson of history in their camp classes.
— He left Apollo and Meg in a field not far from here — Chiron decided to sit back down and began to spread the tablecloth nervously. — He probably should have already reached home while you were flying here.
You sighed, and as you relaxed your body, everyone seemed to feel relieved.
— He has exams, Chiron — He nodded, and you made your way to the table where he was.
— In fact, there are problems, and apparently, he promised to come back this weekend — Your eyebrows furrowed again, and Dionysus laughed.
— Girl, shouldn't you be in New Rome?
— I went home for a few more things, also taking the opportunity to see my family, and it turns out that my little brother was helping an ex god who can't fend for himself, risking his studies. — You replied without looking at him — And speaking of brothers, you should control yours, Mr. D.
The god of wine snorted, and you formed a mocking smile. — Insolent.
— Miss Jackson — Chiron intervened, and you softened your gaze toward him — You can stay tonight, you know you're welcome and after all, it's too late to travel on Pegasus.
You didn't argue with them; you'd never put your pegasus in danger. So, for the first time in a long time, you returned to your cabin, the same one you shared with Percy and Tyson for so many years, and you had to admit that you missed him. At dawn, you were preparing to travel, and you left at the moment you thought no one was watching you, how wrong you were because a few meters away, Apollo was hidden behind the cabin piles, admiring you from afar.
— She… — He felt his heart tighten, and his gaze unfocused. He cursed his mortal body for how weak it was.
— Pervert! — Meg shouted, alerting the other campers who turned confused, and Apollo blushed.
— Shut up, I'm not a pervert — He smiled exaggeratedly at the others, pretending a smile and letting them know that everything was fine.
— You saw her — Said a voice behind him once Meg was far enough away to hear. The brunette turned and smiled sheepishly.
— For a second — Apollo replied, avoiding his old friend's gaze; embarrassment nibbled at his body, and it became evident once his cheeks glowed.
Chiron had never seen him… like that, so young, embarrassed, and notably imperfect, but despite Apollo's opinions about his recent change, he thought it suited him well, even found it amusing.
— You remember…
— I remember it well, Chiron — Apollo blushed even more — That's why I didn't approach her; dealing with my father's wrath is enough. Now I don't want to annoy Poseidon or I'll probably wake up dead on the lake shore tomorrow.
He played with the tips of his sneakers as buried them in the rocks on the floor; he looked like a scared little boy, but Chiron didn't judge him.
— I think you know what it means when she's around when you're close.
The ex god didn't want to pay attention, but he knew he was right.
— Although I remember who she is… there’s a problem. I don't remember how to avoid her…— Apollo's blue eyes looked directly at Chiron's, and the urgency on his face told him he was telling the truth. — If I don't know now, it's going to be harder; all I can do is hide if she's near.
— We've lasted many years with this circus, and as much as I respect the lord of the seas, I don't think this will last long. And you know what's more stubborn than a son of the sea god?
— The sea god — Apollo raised his eyebrows in annoyance, and Chiron resisted rolling his eyes.
— Fate, Apollo. You know it well, things are written. The prophecy is still there; it exists, and all we've done is delay the inevitable.
The brunette nodded with annoyance and waved his hand dismissively.
Although he wanted to pretend that he didn't care, the anxiety of what was to come ate at him. He knew very well that it wouldn't take long for you to discover what all these years had been hidden from you. If Apollo reflected better on that, he wasn't sure he wanted to continue keeping it to himself, either, 'cause those years had been torture for him. Yeah, he knew that you weren't yet mature enough for your mind to be stained with the weight of a prophecy that, unlike the others, not had to do with some quest or some imminent danger that threatened the entire world; but now you are in college, he couldn't wait for you to know.
The thing was, your father thought that the one who could be in danger was you, his precious daughter since Apollo was selfish, arrogant, and immature to have been around for eons. Poseidon could not fully explain the reason The Fates had woven such a destiny for you. So, until things had and could happen at the right time, in the right way, he warned Apollo to be close to you and he knew so well that be such an idiot idea to make him angry.
Before his thoughts could swallow him, Apollo shake them off and sigh to Chiron.
— Right now, I have a bigger problem. I think we've found something.
— Where?
— Here — Chiron frowned, and Apollo looked towards the camp's forest. — My dear friend, you have the Grove of Dodona here, in your playground.
Apollo didn't know that of all the decisions he had made in his life, avoid you was the best one he could make, because even if you had met that day or before, with the things that were about to happen to him, he wouldn't come back as half the man he was.
“Things at the moment, in time” the fates whispered in some place.
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goosefruit · 11 months ago
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underneath the christmas tree
vanessa shelly x fem!reader
tw: smut, sub!reader, praise kink, vanessa eats it from the back, fingering, sex toy/vibrator use
a/n: im sorry if this is ass ive had terrible writer's block for like the past two weeks help
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Pressing down on the last piece of tape, you let out a little ‘aha!’ as you adjusted the material around your body. You took a long look in the mirror, admiring the result of your work.
Nothing except two pieces of wrapping paper covered your top and bottom halves, patterns of snowflakes on a red background. Of course, you made sure to cut away enough paper to show off your cleavage. A dainty pink bow was glued on the makeshift ‘bra’ to top it all off. 
Everything was held together messily by cheap tape, but that didn’t really matter; the outfit was made to be torn apart anyways. 
You looked like a real present. 
For the past forty-five minutes, you had been working on this bizarre scheme that you had thought to be so hilarious. Vanessa was taking one of her hour-long showers, giving you a perfect period of time to take advantage of. 
You heard the shower turn off and quickly rushed to take your place beneath the Christmas tree. 
Though there were still a couple of days to go until Christmas Day, presents were already stacked in neat piles around the base of the tree. At least a quarter of them were from Vanessa to you, who loved to spoil you with her cop money. 
Vanessa stepped out of the washroom in her bathrobe, damp hair draped across her shoulders.
“Woah! Did Santa come early this year?” A playful grin took over her face as she caught sight of you on your knees under the tree. 
“This exactly what you wished for?” You asked her sweetly, feigning innocence despite being half-naked. 
“Mhm,” she leaned down to kiss you. Fresh out of the shower, you could smell a combination of her shampoo, body wash, and lotion. You moaned softly against her lips and pulled her down so that she was on the ground with you. 
Her hands began to wander on your body, nails lightly scratching your bare back. With that, you felt her tongue enter your mouth, and you knew that she was getting impatient for more. 
“Unwrap me,” your voice was barely a whisper. 
In one effortless motion, Vanessa ripped your top in half, letting it fall to the floor. She did not waste a second before cupping your breasts in her hands, squeezing and massaging them. You sucked on the tip of her tongue to let her know how much you were enjoying it. 
Without breaking the kiss, she scooped you up in her arms and carried you to the rug in front of the fireplace. Here, you didn’t have to worry about knocking anything over. 
Her mouth eventually found itself on your breast, licking a stripe up your cleavage. Squeals and whines spewed out of you as she sucked hickeys into your soft skin. 
“So pretty, my love,” Her breath tickled against your collarbone. “Such perfect tits, and you wrapped them up so well for me.”
Fuck, her praises made you so wet. 
“You sound so adorable too. All I want to do is make you whine and moan all day, touching those beautiful tits however you want me to. Think you can be louder for me?”
You nodded swiftly, meeting her lustful eyes.
“Good girl.”
An embarrassingly loud moan slipped out between your lips. 
“Now, let’s see what else we got here.” She slipped her fingers under the remaining wrapping paper and pulled it off your hips, crumpling it into a ball and throwing it god knows where.
Your pussy practically gleamed in the light, folds slick with arousal. You couldn’t help but thrust your hips up in a desperate need for any kind of friction. 
Vanessa gasped with mock-astonishment. “How did you know that this was at the top of my wishlist?” 
You gave her a light slap on the arm for her sarcasm. 
Now, you were in a position where you laid on your back with her on top of you. Her fingers brushed over the top of your pussy. Your sore, needy pussy. 
“I can’t believe this pretty cunt is all mine. Did me playing with your tits get you this wet?” Her hands wrapped around the back of your calves and placed your legs over her shoulders. You shivered as her damp hair stuck to your sensitive inner thighs. 
“Vanessa, touch me please,” you needed to feel her tongue before you passed out from arousal.
“Oh look sweetie, your pussy’s getting wetter, all for me! It’s practically gushing out of you, my needy girl,” she pressed kisses down your thighs, neglecting the part where you needed her most. “I wanna get a taste of that sweet nectar.”
“Just p-please, I need you. Please, please, please, Vanessa.” 
“However, I do have a better idea. On all fours for me, sweetheart.”
You groaned at your pleasure being delayed for even a second longer, but obliged as you had no other choice. Vanessa went behind you, firmly gripping both of your thighs. “What a perfect view,” she sighed lovingly. Before you had time to process, she buried her face in your soaked heat, nails digging into your skin. She pulled you closer to her by the legs, and you yelped as you felt her tongue on your clit after that agonizing wait. 
“Y-yes baby! Fuck— just like that.” You screamed at the top of your lungs. If losing your voice was what it took for her to keep going, you were gladly ready to make the sacrifice.
Vanessa slipped two fingers inside of you, then adding a third when she decided that you were turned on enough to easily take all three. She curled them rhythmically, alternating with strokes of her tongue against your throbbing clit. It was almost embarrassing how fast your orgasm was building up, but every move your girlfriend made brought you closer to the inevitable.
“Just like that, feels so good. God it feels so good, don’t stop, please don’t stop.” You wailed, squeezing your eyes shut. You prayed with all your might that Vanessa was feeling generous enough to let you cum straight away tonight. 
“What a good girl. You taste amazing, I can’t get enough.” She grabbed at your ass, leaving a red imprint. “Cum when you’re ready, m’kay my dear? ‘M not going to be mean tonight, you’ve been such a good girl.”
The “thank you” that you meant to say was lost amongst a long string of moans and profanities as you finally reached your climax. Thrusting your core onto her tongue, arousal gushed out into her mouth and all over her fingers. You didn’t know how long it was until your legs stopped shaking.
“You did such a good job. I’m so proud of you,” Vanessa scooped you up in her arms and held you against her chest, which was rising up and down quickly as she, too, tried to catch her breath.
After a brief moment, she set you down to grab something from the tree.
“Since I got to open an early present today, I thought it would only be fair for you to open one of your own too.” 
She handed you a box, wrapped with blue paper and white ribbon. 
You almost choked when you saw what was inside.
A light pink G-spot vibrator——it seemed rather expensive too, with various different settings built in. 
Vanessa helped you take it out of its packaging, knowing your hands were still shaky from your orgasm. As you examined the toy, she untied her robe and threw it aside, leaving you with a breathtaking view of her naked body. 
“Allow me to give you a demo.”
Taking the toy, she pressed herself against you irresistibly. Her nipples were hard and erect, toned abs flexing as she rolled her hips onto you. The stickiness on her lips tasted of your pleasure.
She lined the silicone up with your entrance, pushing half of it in before turning on the vibrations. You moaned as it found your sweet spot, throwing your head back in ecstasy. 
“Feels good, hmm?” Vanessa hummed, slowly rocking the toy up and down inside of you. “Got some pretty friggin’ great reviews online. Maybe you could leave your own after.” 
Her ability to talk so casually while fucking you never failed to turn you on. Your stomach flipped nonstop, a knot tightening in your core. 
She turned the vibrator up a setting and positioned the handle along her slit.
The noises she let out as she ground her clit against the silicone were sinful, moans and whimpers laced with pure lust. She kept a hand on the toy, now drawing small circles on your g-spot. 
“You gonna cum, baby? Is my princess gonna cum?” Her breathing was harsh and ragged as she began to seek her own high. 
“Ye— turn it up another s-setting, please!” 
She did what you asked, and was rewarded by a huge spurt of squirt splattering all over her thighs. You cried out her name hoarsely as you came, limbs spasming like crazy. 
“You’re so fucking hot, good fucking girl. Squirting all over me like that, gonna make me cum, holy shit.” 
Another roll of her hips, and Vanessa finished with a silent scream. 
It was a rare sight, seeing her lose control like that—back arching, eyebrows knitted, eyes rolling back, and mouth wide open. You loved it.
When she was stable enough to stand, she got up to retrieve her bathrobe and covered the two of you with it. The fireplace softly crackled in the background, radiating heat. 
You laid with your eyes closed as she spooned you from behind, feeling so warm, so loved, and so very grateful.
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dreorig · 1 year ago
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Kitten.
When you decided to prank Eddie and turn him into a certified cat boy, you couldn't have imagined what happened next.
content/warnings: +18 | sub bottom cat hybrid eddie x soft dom top male reader | smut | fluff | it's silly kinda | unprotected sex | anal sex | breeding kink | praise kink | slight feminisation | eddie just needs some love, the poor baby | tiniest mention of venom, sorry
notes: this originally was a long fic (around 4k... unfinished...) but methinks people don't really fuck with long fics so i decided to post only the smut (>﹏<) it explained how eddie turned into a kitty kat and etc, plus contained lots of fluff cuz im a sucker for that!! but yeahhh i gave up. also. eddie is wearing a collar with a little bell cuz wahh!!! he's just!!!! too cute!!!!!! ive got this idea for a while now so enjoy ig?!?!?!?!?!
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Approaching the half-closed door, you could hear your name between needy whimpers. You opened the door with a smirk on your face and Eddie didn't even notice you. Eddie's head was down and his ass up in the air while he fingered himself, the wet noises sounding like music to you — his hands slid under one of your shirts that he was wearing and began playing with his own chest, whimpering louder when he pinched his nipples. Eddie's tail was raised too; a sign that a cat is ready to mate.
Lord, have mercy on thy son.
"Oh, Eddie, aren't you a sight for sore eyes?"
Your voice snapped Eddie out of it. He switched positions in the blink of an eye and now he was sitting up, eyes wide and face flustered as he squeezed his thighs together in a poor attempt to hide what you had already seen, looking at you as if he'd rather face Satan himself at the moment.
"It's okay, you don't need to feel embarrassed." You held his hand and pressed a soft kiss on it. "My friend told me you're in heat, just like a cat."
"H-heat?"
"That's right. Your body should calm down after mating a couple times." You put a hand on his cheek, using the other to interlace your fingers with his. "I can help you, if you'd like? But of course you don't have to do anything you don't want, dear. We can always find another solution."
"N-no, please," he rubbed his face against your palm, trying to feel the most of your caresses. "Need you."
He would be the death of you one of these days.
"Alright, sweetie." You kissed the corner of his lips. "As much as I love to see you in my clothes, don't you think this shirt is gonna get in our way? Um? Let's take it off."' You grabbed the hem of the shirt, lifted it over his head and tossed it aside somewhere. Getting up, you began taking your own shirt off. "Now, hands under your knees."
Your cock throbbed inside your pants as you watched Eddie pulling his legs up, those thick thighs touching his chest with ease, exposing his already well-stretched hole with lube dripping out of it. His fully hard cock was in a similar state, wet with pre-cum and lube, and his balls looked so ready to get squeezed.
Fuck, you really needed to fuck him into oblivion.
"Such a good princess for me." You licked your lips, admiring the sight before you. His tail quivered. "I'm gonna breed you so well. You'd like that, wouldn't you? To get pregnant, full of my babies."
Eddie almost melted on the spot over the idea, his fluffy ears upright while he attentively listened to what you'd do to him soon. He couldn't bring himself to say anything, so he nodded eagerly instead, the bell on his neck tinkling. You chuckled, pulling down your pants and boxers.
"Of course you do, princess." You finished undressing and leaned over him, inhaling his addicting scent. "Sorry for making you wait, love."
Wrapping his arms around your neck, Eddie moaned in your mouth when you kissed him while your hands landed on his hips and squeezed them. You bit and sucked on his lips, craving that sweet taste you'd never get tired of. Finishing the kiss, you wasted no time in putting your mouth to work again as you sucked his already hard nipple, a hand now playing with his other nipple, occasionally grabbing the mass around it. Making sure not a single inch of that perfect chest was neglected, you know.
Eddie felt so hot that for a while he thought he'd burst into flames anytime your hands stopped touching his body, even if for no more than five seconds. God, was he horny. Your tip just touched his hole, as if teasing him, and Eddie didn't know if that was on purpose or not but shit, he was impatient. Grinding his ass against your cock, he moaned, "H-hurry up… can't wait… any longer…"
"I know you want it, kitten, but I also know you can wait just a little more. I taught you well, didn't I? Let me show you some love first."
You bit Eddie's shoulder, not enough to hurt, just to leave an ownership mark you knew your princess would like to look at later — you had to fight the urge to rip off the collar and have full access to his neck once again, but you kept your cool because he looked so cute wearing that. Instead, you palmed his aching cock and stroked it at a slow pace, taking your own sweet time to trace those veins your fingerprints already had memorised; that earned you a groan from the irritated kitten beneath you, who didn't know if he should move his hips to meet your strokes or grind his ass on your hardness, wordlessly asking you to just stop the crap and fuck him already.
"My kitten is just too needy, um? Alright, let's have it your way this one time."
Eddie let out a loud, satisfied moan when you finally began burying your cock inside him, not as fast as he wanted but he could feel every inch of your cock slowly stretching him out and for that he was grateful — Venom was probably saying something in his mind about how weird and mildly pathetic humans were with their mating habits, but Eddie's mind was too foggy to understand or even give a shit. Then you abruptly pulled out, but before Eddie could protest, you shoved it all again in one go.
Eddie's teary eyes widened and saliva ran down his chin, "Fuck—"
You felt a sticky, hot fluid hitting your stomach and you didn't even need to look down to see what it was; you couldn't help but grin, looking at your boyfriend. "Eddie, did you just cum only because I slammed my cock inside you? Sometimes I forget my princess is really just a cock slut."
Eddie whimpered, his face looking impossibly red, and closed his eyes, burying his face in the crook of your neck. You chucked, not really expecting an answer, and began moving at a more-slow-than-fast, steady pace. The wet sounds that echoed in the room each time your skin met combined with Eddie's whines almost drove you insane.
You kept pounding Eddie just right, he didn't even mind the slight discomfort in his overstimulated cock, only bringing himself to plead, "More, please, more."
Always eager to do as he wishes, you began increasing your pace, thrusting deeper and deeper, just the way you knew Eddie liked. Tinkle, tinkle, tinkle. He was sobbing in your ear and digging his claws into your skin — and you loved knowing that would leave marks. Then you noticed something very interesting.
"Would you look at that, kitten…" you grabbed Eddie's hand and put it atop of his own lower abdomen, making him feel the bulge there each time you thrusted. "See how deep I am? Does it feel good, princess?"
Eddie only nodded rapidly, his mind only half conscious now. He could only concentrate on how good your cock felt repeatedly hitting his sweet spot.
"No, no, not like that. I want you to tell me how good you feel. I know you can do that, kitten."
"It's — ah!— so good… I'm so full. Ahh~ f-faster, please?"
"Anything for my obedient princess." You kissed his cheek and said, "Wrap your legs around my waist and hold on tight."
Eddie complied and immediately you changed your pace to a faster, harder and even deeper one, feeling Eddie's claws now digging across your back. You moved your head to nibble on his neck, leaving small bites and hickeys all over his skin, and one of your hands travelled to his cock in order to give it attention once again.
"You're taking me so well, princess. Your perfect body is all mine, even your tight hole was made to fit my cock so beautifully," you praised Eddie as you stroked him with the same pace of your thrusts. "Such a good kitten. That's right, keep moaning in my ear like a cute princess."
"[Name]!" Eddie broke down once he came again, sobbing as heavy tears fell down his face, and hugged you tighter. "D-deep! You're so deep!"
Eddie's tears made you almost dizzy. Holy fuck, how could he be so freaking perfect?
"Shit—" you panted, "I'm gonna cum. Okay, kitten? And you're gonna take it all until there's nothing left and you're all full of my babies, because you're gonna be such an amazing mamma. Ain't that right, dear?"
"Goddamn, yes." Eddie's pretty face was wet with tears, his pink lips also wet and swollen, and you could see his fangs as he let out the cutest moan ever escape. Then he opened his glossy eyes and fixed his lovey-dovey gaze on you, "I promise to be the best mamma to our babies."
That did it. You tightened the grip on his waist and pushed him against you, giving one last deep thrust before reaching your climax, feeling him clenching around your cock as you proceeded to fill him up with your seed. Your grip on his waist remained strong, locking you both together and not allowing a single drop of cum to leak out of his hole before you properly breed him.
Eddie was limp in your arms, still letting out a few more tears as you held him close before calming down. You smiled fondly at the sight, loving how cute he was.
"You're so pretty. My pretty princess." You peppered  his face with kisses, feeling the salty taste of his tears on your lips. "I love you so much."
Eddie's mind was still foggy but yet he gave a cosy smile, managing to mumble, "I love you too."
Afterwards you made Eddie drink some water and showered him with praises, making sure he was alright — that, of course, until Eddie started begging you to fuck him once again, because he was still a needy kitty in heat.
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m3hgumi · 1 year ago
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— their love languages
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a/n: apologies for the inactivity! ive been prepping for my first semester of college and i haven't gotten all of my creative juices refilled just yet. for now, take this (i honestly don't know where im going with this but fuck it we ball)
pairings: itadori yuji x f!reader, fushiguro megumi x f!reader, gojo satoru x f!reader, inumaki toge x f!reader
genres: fluff, mutual pining, hurt/comfort, mild angst
word count: 745
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ITADORI YUJI is a gentleman in all of the right ways. a spring in his step often leads him to open and hold the door for you whenever the two of you are roaming the busy streets of tokyo, taking in the sights incomparable to those in his life before jujutsu high. during said times, he always has an arm slinging across your neck, wrapped in his embrace, sometimes laying his head on your shoulder as an act of protection. he insists on walking you back to your dorm after dates at night, wanting to make sure you get home safe and sound. when dates are in the comfort of the student dorms, his cooking abilities are put at stake, though he knows that you would not judge and whatever he whips for dinner that day will taste better than the last. yet he strives to get the amount of seasoning on the meatballs just right, because there is nothing more that makes his heart swell than seeing your face light up when you munch excitedly on the delicacies of his cooking.
FUSHIGURO MEGUMI prides himself in actions over words. he's made it his life's goal to protect those he finds dear to him, with you being one of them. though he is not one for physical or verbal displays of affection, acts of service are his vice through which he expresses his love for you. to him, love is just more than "i love you"s and pda. it is also the small distance he keeps between you and him that allows him to protect you at just below a second's notice. it is also the extra change of clothes, a meal, and drinks he leaves in your dorm for you to come back to after a mission. it is also the stinging of the alcohol that he rubs on your wounds when you can't visit shoko after a troubling battle with a curse. it is also the light scolding he gives you after pushing yourself too hard with your technique while training or in the battlefield. though his "i love you"s are rare, his affection is received by you more than you count.
GOJO SATORU is a man of daily affirmations, which includes his "i love you"s multiple times throughout the day, a direct reminder of his affection. whether it is the first thing he does in the morning, right before he has to part from you for work, when he passes by you in the hallways, after he gets home from a long day of rambunctious teenagers and missions, or before his consciousness drifts off for a few hours. though he is no dictionary, his nicknames for you are endless, each coming out of his mouth with a hearty smile that's able to break you from any sour mood. going from a "babe" to "sweetheart" to "darling", he can't get enough of the sweet taste in his tongue when he calls out for you. he is not shy of physical touch either, always having an arm around your neck to keep you close while the two of you are outside. his personal favorite is tickling, usually in the comfort of the sofa in your shared apartment. your laughs as he mercilessly tickles your neck and stomach are music to his ears, escaping from the burdens of being the strongest.
for INUMAKI TOGE, physical touch and acts of service are the voices of his love that cannot be expressed verbally. the silver locks of his hair tickle the base of your neck as he leans closer, keeping his head under your chin as his arms wrap around your waist. he holds you firmly yet gently, almost taking a protective stance in the comfort of your own bedroom. it isn't just cuddles in the early mornings that convey his devotion to you though. you find his love in the items he brings back from his grocery runs, which are seemingly random until you remember that you were in need of it anyways and it always tended to slip your mind when you were already there. the endless tiktoks and memes reminding him of you that are sent, his daily check in texts, his goodnight texts, his scent coming from the clothes that he lends you still sitting the closet of your dorm, forgetting to return them, yet he doesn’t mind; all are signs of his affection, without him having to voice an “i love you”
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© m3hgumi 2023. all rights reserved. do not copy, modify, or repost my works anywhere
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stevie-petey · 10 months ago
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hiiiiiiiii honey <3 could we get a blurb about bug telling steve about jonathan’s outburst towards her after he took the pictures of nancy and steve’s reaction to learning about it???? it would be so so appreciated by me <3 you’re the best ever <3 MWAH
(i am being held against my will to write this jonathan sweetie im so sorry) (i love u val) (u are evil)
i know this isnt necessarily what u MEANT but ,,, ive been dying to expand upon bugs kindness and how it may seem annoying and pathetic, but its hers ! its her kindness !!!
enjoy <3
"no way you guys havent wanted to strangle each other at least once." steve remarks one day as he watches you and jonathan work side by side at the cash register.
jonathan had been bored today and decided to join you and steve at work, something that you're very happy about, honestly.
"oh, ive definitely wanted to strangle jonathan," you say, writing down a new shipment receipt while the boy next to you doodles.
steve rolls his eyes. "old married couple squabbling doesnt count. im talking, like, full on betrayal and hurt here. you guys are always so... you, and it has to be an act."
jonathan snorts. "shouldve seen the fights we had last year. surprised y/n didnt kill me with her bare hands."
"i dont believe you."
"no, hes right." you look up at steve. "he threw a jacket at my face last year and then told me we werent family the night he took those pictures of nancy. then cried in my arms like a day later."
steve stares at you, shocked.
"i also then slept in nancys bed and lied about it. and tried leaving you behind a few times."
"that you did," you flick jonathans ear, causing him to wince in pain. "you deserved that."
"i did."
during this entire exchange, steve hasnt said a single word. hes still stunned, baffled by the fact that jonathan could be so cruel to someone so wonderful.
"wait a second," he looks between you and jonathan. "and youre still friends?"
"yeah." you both say at the same time.
steve cant fucking believe it. you do anything and everything for jonathan, that much is obvious, and sure. steve has seen jonathan do small acts of kindness towards you, devote the same back, but to throw a jacket at you and belittle you? and now here he is, joking about it alongside you. as if it was all okay in the end.
"youre too nice sometimes, y/n." the words leave steves lips before he can stop them. once he realizes what hes said, he looks up at jonathan and panics. "sorry, man. im sure you guys talked it out and... yeah."
jonathan shrugs. "no, youre right. she is and i was dick."
"im right here, you know."
steve winces. "sorry."
"its fine, honestly." you go back to scribbling shipment orders. "i am indeed too nice, but i dont ever really see the point in holding a grudge? i mean, jonathan apologized and i understood the stress he was under. sure, it didnt erase all the hurt he caused, but after almost dying immediately after being mad at him for not including me in something... i dont know. it felt silly to hold onto that anger after. childish, even."
jonathan and steve share a look, for once both seeming to think the same thing.
shes too good.
you hate that they do this. you hate that people view your kindness as a weakness. after the hell youve been through, long before monsters even came to hawkins, youve learned the hard way just how rare kindness is.
now you try to be kind to everything and everyone, no matter what it may cost you.
the kindness is yours, no one elses.
and if that makes you weak, then at least it made you better.
you tear two pieces paper from your notebook, scrunch them up into balls, and then throw them at steve and jonathan. "stop pitying me. im kind and i love that aspect of myself. i dont care if it makes me vulnerable or pathetic. its a piece of me, and i wouldnt change it. if you dont like it, then that belittles me even more than emotional outbursts ever could."
jonathan sighs. "youre right, bug. youre a very kind and lovely person and its what makes you a joy to be around, paper balls and all."
steve plays along. "definitely a better super power than spider-man, dare i say."
"okay, lets not get ahead of ourselves now," you giggle, appreciative of both the boys. they may not understand or like the way you view the world, but theyre at least trying.
its all you could ask for.
even if steve later on that day pulls you aside to whisper, "i think i can kick jonathans ass this time, if you ever need it."
and its enough.
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bigassbowlingballhead · 25 days ago
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so we all know that my dreams are weirdly hyper realistic and plot driven so buckle the fuck up.
number one: everything (like, the rules of reality) was the same as real life except i guess my bf didnt exist (sad but necessary for the plot i suppose). im at thanksgiving at my parents house, which is a weekend long affair. tzp and redacted are married and also there bc they are my friends i guess. im definitely better friends w taylor than redacted but redacted and i get along and like each other. okay. the scene is set.
so, im preparing dinner with my dad and aunts like usual. taylor and redacted have slept in but taylor comes out to help eventually. he is fresh from a shower and wearing a very tight shirt. we talk while i cook and it’s clear that i need to fuck this man like, yesterday. within the dream logic, this is not the first time ive fucked around with him — this is a thing that we do. go me!
so we’re like okay, where can we go, bc i have a one story house and it’s full of family members at thanksgiving. i mean FULL. and redacted is sleeping so we dont wanna bother him, but there is literally nowhere that we can go that a family member wouldnt also be there and see us (damn you, open floor plans!!!) so what else can we do but go outside behind the pool shed, obviously.
now, it IS november in philadelphia, so it’s not WARM, but we’re making it work. i got this man bent over in a tiny corner of backyard, shirt fully off, making him see god. weve got our shoes on and mostly pants except for the important parts. hes not making as much noise as i want him to make (bc duh, we gotta be quiet), but im doing my damnedest to make him squeak, so im touching every inch of him that i can. i remember that i was thinking “i wish i had another hand to grab his hair, bc i already have one hand on his balls and the other on his dick and im not willing to give up on either of those for the sake of making him arch his back.” obviously this was a tough decision by me, but what are you gonna do. also at this point important to mention that i dont actually remember all the details, just flashes of stuff and general vibes. i was definitely like “hurry up and come man, we are on borrowed time here,” but taylor was apparently in no rush no matter how much i played with his dick. also at some point i put my hand on his stomach and could feel his abs and how he was moving every time i did and whew. that was hot.
so TRAGICALLY we were interrupted before the grand finale. i am not pleased but hey, if it’s time for dinner then it’s time for dinner. so i sit next to tzp at dinner and redacted sits on the other side and im TRYING to enjoy my MEAL but those two are definitely doing something under the table. whores.
things get a little weird and dreamscape-y here so i’ll skip most of dinner but the only relevant plot point that came up is i found out about something thats been seriously irritating me at work is happening again and so i was kinda pissed. but anyway.
so after dinner all the cousins decide to get in the pool which is insane to do bc it is NOVEMBER and my parents never even have the pool open at thanksgiving, but it’s my dream so fuck weather patterns in guess. so we’re all in the pool and taylor has clearly still not gotten off and redacted and i are having a good time messing with him, you know how it goes, standard pool shenanigans but nothing too bad bc my parents are RIGHT THERE so. keep it pg. but after we go inside?? oh all bets are OFF.
now here’s where things go bad for me. we go inside and we’re only in our towels and we’re all three looking for a place to fuck and we CANT FIND ONE. it’s only a three bedroom house and all three bedrooms are occupied. for some fucking reason we try my parents room first (which im glad was occupied bc i would not be down to fuck in my parents room, ick), but my little sister and my cousin are in there watching a movie with the little cousins, so thats a big fat no thank you. then we go to my sister’s room which yeah, i wouldnt feel GREAT about fucking in there, but it’s a redacteds threesome on the table and if i have to do it i will. but thats where my uncle and aunt are sleeping and hes in there napping after all the pie so thats another no go. so now im pretty pissed off bc of the work thing and also pls why cant we find a place to just FUCK.
so we go into my old bedroom and im thinking this will be fine, this is where redacted and taylor are sleeping anyway, (why didnt we go there first? whos to say) this will be open and we can get down. but we get in there and two people ive never met before are in the bed. what.
so my family tends to take in a lot of strays around the holidays. if you dont have a place to go for thanksgiving and you know a relative of mine, you are automatically invited to my parents house. theres always like 5-6 unrelated people at dinner just bc my uncle or cousin or whomever showed up and was like “i have extras!” and my mom is always like “dope! come in and eat!” it’s a lovely representation of the welcoming nature of my family and culture and it’s something that i always love to see around the holidays but it is also currently FUCKING ME OVER BC I JUST WANT TO BANG THESE MEN IN PEACE!!!
so im like “excuse me, with all due respect, who the fuck are you.” and the one guy was immediately rude (sir you are in MY BED) and was like “your mom said we could stay here so fuck off.” and im like??? YOU fuck off?? but then another part of me is like “no, your mother raised you better than that, you need to be welcoming to people so they dont feel unwanted.” the thing is that at this moment they are in fact VERY unwanted. so taylor is also pissed and redacted is trying to calm him down but keep in mind that taylor hasnt finished still so hes a bit bitchy. and redacted is like “what if we just went and got a hotel room somewhere,” and im like NO, we are in nothing but our bathing suits, we are all horny and ready to go, this is HAPPENING.
so i go back into my parents room and i ask my cousin hey have you seen my mom and also maybe you guys could watch the movie in the basement bc desperate times call for desperate measures and im not gonna fuck in my parents bed but maybe the floor would be fine. and shes like i think your mom is doing the dishes but why do you need a bedroom all to yourself? and i just gave her a look and i was like come on. why do you think. and she asked “ohh, okay, so wait, where do you see this going with taylor?” and i was like “oh it’s not going anywhere, he’s married to redacted, we just fuck around. it’s great, sometimes redacted joins, sometimes not, but it’s always a good time.” and she was somewhat scandalized and i was like oh right. within the context of my family that would be an objectively insane thing to just drop like that.
so anyway. after that the dream gets all weird and dreamy (there was some plotline with kamala harris i think? i think i worked for her? but she was actually also my irl boss interchangeably? idk). but thats the story of how i fucked taylor at thanksgiving in my subconscious. also i just remembered that while i was fucking him and had my hand on his stomach i could feel the outline of my strap through his abs. have a good day i love you 😘
the outline of your strap though his abs is CRAZY GIA. i love it.
also where'd the strap come from, was it stored behind the pool shed for safe keeping, are you just strapped at all times always ready to bend over a gay man? (me next)
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otiksimr · 7 months ago
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Hey can i just like. Ramble. For a soild minute.
Your art is so cool like. Chefs kiss. Its great. The anatomy and structures are honestly so well built and fluid for whatever youre drawing especially for the "fuck it we ball" mindset (honestly me) and besides that, your wof and general character designs??? Solid. 10/10. I wish the silkwings and hivewings had mandibles like that in canon. Especially the nightwing patterns based on the skies! Its pretty neat :3
And the idea with the leafwings and symbiosis! Like walking gardens! Thats so cool?? Could you imagine what the wof weed breath of evil would do to that? Imagine Hawthorn for example having a basic garden thats actually infected by the plant, to where it perhaps saps energy from the other plants in its reach to gain more control over time? Maybe leafwings could be more affected by the othermind in that sense.
Oh and also! The posts about dieties! Ive got my own project ive been working on for a year or two now and was genuinely shocked to see someone else with the same train of thought? Usually whenever i see diety characters or worlds revolving around them, theyre often tied to our own customs and societal rules, same with the laws of physics, time, space ect. So i was hyped to see another person going against that too! Like with the whole "no gender just vibes" as them being concepts and not exactly outright physical beings. Same with them not quite having a moral compass but rather a "directive compass" where theyre more inclined to just do their own thing if it benefits them rather than in consolation with the opposing entity. As you phrased it, theyre "benevolent by nature"!
I swear like 70% of my liked posts are yours lmao and any time your pfp changes i get caught of guard by it and just go "Hey! Another fan of Eims! Wait a minute. That is Eim"
Anyways, just wanted to say your art is cool and that its inspired me to draw more often and to try experimenting with my designs a bit more! :33
Alright im done rambling ill shuffle away now :3
-shark anon (or something like that)
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Auauahguahg Thank you!!!
Whenever it comes to gods in general I always felt iffy trying to gender them, like trying to gender a concept just feels wrong. I like having gods be tangible but incomprehensible if that makes sense. They are unbound by the laws of the universe as they are what created it.
Also a piece of lore about the 'concept' thing. Concepts can exist without a god. There are an endless amount of concepts but there's not a god for all of them, typically only 'important' concepts such as life and death have gods of which control and embody it. That being said when gods are created concepts- latch onto them so to speak.
Then there are the primordial gods, more True Deity than True Primordial though, the Abyss and the Radiance of which were concepts that existed for so long that they gained a will and consciousness of kickstarted the existence of the universe as we know it as. One concept, interestingly enough that has yet to have deity attached to it though, is time. :)
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indulgencecentral · 1 year ago
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pairing: geto suguru × fcoded!reader
warnings: NSFW, grinding, semi public sex, teasing, blowjob, nicknames.
A/N: listen, idk where ive been, but i'm back! im gonna try and post more regularly. i wrote this in like half an hour. my sugu deserves the world. pushing my 'sugar' nickname for suguru agenda too. and yeah, I changed my format bc the other one was too much work. NOT PROOFREAD EITHER.
MDNI
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you're with suguru at the club and it's dark. the only way you feel him is the way he touches you, hand on your hips, grabbing handfuls of your hips, caressing the sensitive sides of your body, running his hands over the spots that get you going, the pads of his thumbs teasing the underside of your breasts through the tight dress your wearing.
the final straw is his breath tickling the nape of your neck. you're grinding against him, and you feel the length of him pressing into you, insistent and throbbing, and you're going mad with need, you want more, you want him.
you can't take it anymore, so you drag him into the club bathroom. he's pressed you against the wall of the bathroom, mouth is hot and ravenous against you, he's biting your bottom lip and licking into your mouth, swallowing your every gasp and moan, he doesn't stop there, his mouth is teasing along your jaw, moving down your throat to suck hickies and marks into your skin, peppering your flushed body with reminders of him, and your left to whimper and moan so loudly that you should be embarrassed but his mouth feels too good.
your fingers are clumsy and desperate, you need to feel the weight of him in your hand. you love his cock, and you're dropping to your knees before him, laving kisses along his length, giddy at the sight of him, towering over you. he was dressed like a meal, a crop top over fishnet that hugged his gorgeous musculature in all the right places, jeans slung low on his hips undone down the front, his eyeliner smeared, hair cascading down his shoulders marked with your nails, begging to be pulled.
your drooling, who wouldn't, and kissing the tip of his cock, licking the underside to the sound of him groaning, his fist slamming against the wall, and you run your hands up his thighs, caressing every bit of bare skin and you swallow his dick, slobbering around him, watching as he pants above you, his mouth gaping as you bob on his length, slow and teasing.
it doesn't take long for him to crack, and you're gasping as his hand fists your hair, and he's fucking into your mouth, slow, shallow thrusts that leave you wanting more, until you dig your nails into his skin, and he let's out a breathy moan, and then he's fucking into your mouth until your throat bruises, and your swallowing him down like his good girl.
he's reaching his peak now, you can tell, sweat making his hair stick to his forehead, eyes closed in concentration, the pace of his hips is faltering, you have spit down your chin, and your humming around him, fingers reaching to softly stroke his balls, hanging low, and that sends him over the edge, he's cumming down your throat.
you take everything he has to give you, suckling on his swollen head, looking up at him through your ruined make up, giving him a close lipped smile as you release his cock with a distinct 'pop.' he's stroking your hair, looking down at you with eyes filled with affection, lifting you up in his arms, giving you a soft, open-mouthed kiss, groaning at the taste of him on your tongue.
"my pretty princess," he whispered, leaning in close, gently biting the lobe of your ear, and you shivered at the gesture.
"sugar, can we go home now?" you whimper, reeling at the sensation of his knee pressing between your thighs.
"whatever my darling wants."
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Original Work
All reblogs and interactions are appreciated!
All characters belong to Gege Akutami.
Do not plagiarise, copy or repost my work anywhere.
© all rights reserved @indulgencecentral
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narwhalandchill · 6 months ago
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oh and also speaking of wuwa. what is it with chinese gachas these days and their one (1) random fucking Dude With A Finnish Name For No Apparent Reason
like theres welt from hi3rd and hsr. aka originally known as joachim nokianvirtanen. whos presumably half german half finnish. but the worst fucking thing about it is that like. while joachim is a very standard german name. ""nokianvirtanen" is NOT a finnish surname. its like an amateur writer looking up random finnish words to mush together into a surname with 0 research into what finnish surnames actually sound like. now by themselves. nokia? virtanen? oh absolutely that works 100%. together? it literally sounds AI generated it makes me cry 💀💀💀
(It could also just literally be nokia-virtanen or virtanen-nokia with the hyphen and work. but nokiaN is possessive form . but NOBODY is fucking called "nokia's virtanen" WHAT. THATS NOT HOW IT WORKSSSSS or like if theres Any legit surname w a possessive form in it which there prolly are some its a Very specific thing not sth broadly applicable at all)
whereas sampo koski is like. honestly peak bc its the complete fucking opposite. this name is like. this is literally Just A Dude. Theres probably like hundreds of actual fucking sampo koskis out there whose linked ins have been permanently buried under Rail the Stars game search results on google i literallg NEED to meet one irl someday and ask them about it its so fucking funny 😭😭😭
like. okay koski is just an uhhhhhhhh. its a type of a waterfall in a river . Rapids? but yeah its a very standard surname. Except not like this SUPER common generic googled the top 10 tier name bc its genuinely an authentic name you run into that sounds natural. Like it doesnt sound like A Character surname its too normal. and then sampo refers to a mythical miracle machine in karelian and finnish folklore with 3 corners that each makes riches of the ocean (represented w salt) the soil (w grain) and the earth (w gold) freely for whoever owns it. In lore some ppl fight over it long story anyway louhi was right. which is again its not some uber common name but its a Very natural one its so weirdddd ive had a sampo for a classmate its cursed 💀💀 and have prolly known a koski at some point too
Anyway point being. Sampo koski is literally the Quintessential normie This is a person not a Space Gacha Game Character name idk HOW they just. came up w it it feels so weirdddd. this is like if boothill was just called like. Josh.
anyway my only real issue w sampo is just that he doesnt fucking act finnish. yes its true reducing nationalities to caricatures is bad but. Listen if you rep us. it HAS to be all the stereotypes actually. we arent all antisocial and depressed for half the year bc its too dark and insomniac and pissed off the other half bc its too bright just to get some fruity fucking aha follower with a name youd see on the employee list of the most mundane fucking office job . i like sampo i just cant claim him . he talks too much and dresses too flamboyant hes an impostor
which brings us to. Wuthering waves. and like as we can see hoyos finnish names have had their interesting moments for sure. so like hows kuro games faring?
Oh they called him--
They Called The Random Finnish Name Guy Of The Wuthering Da Waves Game---
AALTO?????????!??!??? AALTO?????!?
THEY LITERALLY CALLED HIM WAVE IN FINNISH WHAT THE FUCKKKKJKK
honestly idek if i should be insulted or just like. Amazed by the sheer balls it takes to just call him half the title of ur game and be like ah. Perfect. represented the feeble finns again
anyway tho unironically. While he also (to my knowledge at least) has the like. cocky lighthearted menace personality which like. No. at least the way he looks is peak acceptable like yeah this is a random finnish guy animefied and airdropped into this post apocalyptic scifi fantasy world. the quintessentially finnish awful out of fashion speedy sunglasses (this is a cultural in joke that i will Not be elaborating on). the sensible tactical gear. i respect him the white long hair is clearly a survival tactic its camouflage. hes fine. also props for having an aspect of camouflage in his kit w the taunts bc yes historical reference winter war the finns are indeed out there blending in with the environment wahoo. no particular thoughts tho i did pull him so ig legal obligation to build his ass
anyway aalto is also an university. lowkey the students there should just do a power move and make an aalto cosplay like the secondary uniform alongside haalarit itd be funny
but yeah am i going anywhere with this? Making some serious critique god forbid? Not in particular i am just. Continuously baffled w this. bc its not like these characters Are finnish by any metric. They just get random fucking finnish names and its like every single chinese gacha now needs to have a token one and im just here like.but why . What is the purpose of it . what is so effervescent about googling random finnish names and slapping them on your male characters . I do not understand
+ honorary mention to ukko the frostarm lavachurl in genshin. Another folkloric reference (ukko the sky/thunder god) . couldnt even give us a fruity guy in that one. though sitting in your bespoke isolation in a freezing hellhole and beating the shit out a random traveler disrupting your peace is way more finnish than a single sentence most of these characters have uttered so like. Fair actually that Is a mood. king behavior
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intertexts · 6 months ago
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YAYYYY YOU KNOW DAKOTA BACKSTORY NOW <333 YOU MADE IT !!!!!!
EPISODE 19 + 20 TRIVIA:
- they are all. so very sad. let me play you a song on the worlds tiniest violin
- charlie: "im angling my mic so i can lay on the ground"
- after 5 minutes of just going "im sad" "im sad" "me too" they are FINALLY talking about the episodes
- SUMMER AND DOUG !!!!!!!!!! ohhh i love them they are important 2 me
- the other heroes with summer and doug were fan created!!! the one with black and white hair is Portalgeist (teleportation power), the one with the green visor is Valence (no mention on their power), and then the pink one with the mask is Sleepyhead (sleep/illusion/dream powers) :]
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- grizzly: "im glad the water thing worked!! william was proud of me because i didnt rush in and that meant a lot"
- "there is a reason dakota thinks there are three different summers and not just one summer, i think it'll probably come up when we meet the doctor" << HELLO??? i dont actually remember this. omg
- "i hope le frog can finally move on and get over us now. hes their problem now" MEAN 2 HIM !!!!!!
- william figuring out how to neutralize the demons........ woag (on that note he said his original intention was to turn it into a wisp. do with that what you will)
- moving onto 20 woooooo everyone sad again!
- bizly: "i have gone over it in my head a thousand times how i would present her and everything, i hope i did it some sort of justice because every time ive thought about it since you originally told that idea it has made me *this sad*"
- "DAKOTA COLE CHARACTER STUDY EPISODE" << this is such a huge win for me
- "dakota has been very scared to go see his aunt for a very long time. i dont think he ever would have done that alone. i almost wanted him to say that to you guys in the episode but i dont think he wouldve even processed it enough to admit that yet"
- condi and charlie both said they didnt really know what to say in character a lot kf the time but then they realized they didnt really have to say anything, the important part was that the characters where physically there for dakota in that moment
- grizzly: "i mean im sure it was a huge surprise for william and vyncent not just the scenario itself because dakota never talked about it, but the fact that i dont think theyve seen him get emotional like that. its always been sort of over the top righteous anger and never anything this soft or quiet" (charlie: im curling up in a ball on the floor)
- DAKOTA DAMASCUS !!!!!!!!!!!
- they (bizly and grizzly) were a little nervous about how well this was gonna play out because its such a direct real life kind of issue, but they both really like that it adds such a huge layer to dakotas character
- bizly: "i mean, you have this guy- both of his parents were literally killed in the wake of a superhero fight and he STILL grows up with the mindset of 'i wanna be a superhero!' and just this unwavering optimism and urge to do the right thing"
- condi: "i cant wait for us to get into william shit too i reaaally wanna get into whats going on with him"
charlie: "huh? what william stuff?"
condi, suddenly SUPER AGGRESSIVE: "I wanna go to *FUCKING DEADWOOD*"
- grizzly: "i mean william is scared of facing things so part of dakotas whole goal with this was to face something he was really scared of doing to hopefully inspire william to do the same"
- charlie: "i think ive said this before but i think william sees dakota as... making it. into the prime force, as a superhero, just as The Guy who stands out above us all, right. i think he sees dakota making it out of all of this. i don't think he sees that for himself."
grizzly: "dakota Will Not make it to that point without dragging william and vyncent up with him. hes not gonna leave them behind for anything"
- "there are a lot of things william would pry into way too much, i mean its literally on his sheet as one of his complications, but i dont think he would ever pry about this unless dakota brought it up first and wanted to talk about it" aaaahhh the ghostkicksisms
- bizly had said someone had been in the apartment recently, which was weird because his aunt has been in rehab for a WHILE. grizzly doesnt even know who it couldve been
- they said they intentionally kept the details of her rehab sort of vague, they didnt want to get too into the descriptions of it bc that would be too real and too heavy and they wouldnt want to represent anything like that in a poorly handled way. generally though she is there for addiction/alcoholism
- "how pissed would you guys be if we got to the end of the campaign and le frog was the final boss" and they all get VERY GENUINELY ANNOYED JUST AT THE THOUGHT OF THAT POSSIBILITY "bizly i would leave. i would quit"
- charlie: "i have NOTABLY *not* been using a secret identity for a LONG time. because i think william stopped taking the whole hero thing seriously, he doesnt see a point in it anymore"
- bizly says they have already met who he plans to be the final villain of the whole campaign!! theyre trying to guess now, charlie says it would be cool if it was mark (holy shit), grizzly says mal !!!! he thinks mal is going to take the tricksters power in some way. he also jokingly said it would be funny if harlem shade turned out to be the main bad guy because he would have fun playing him as a villain. (condi had to leave early so he doesnt get a guess) . charlie says they all have their own Big Villains right now (wiwi has mal, vyncent has the lich, grizzly doesnt have one yet but he probably will eventually), but he doesnt necessarily see mal becoming THE villain. neither of them think the trickster is going to be the main villain since the whole point of season 2 has been to get ashe back
- GRIZZLY ADMITS HE THINKS MARK IS A REDEEMABLE CHARACTER. WIN !!!!!!!!!!!
DAKOTA CHARACTER STUDY WHOOOOO!!!!!! I MADE IT!!!!!!! a little blood covered and trembling but i made it!!! also jesus i have a BACKLOG of trivia u sent me i wanna talk about so bad... thank u king btw. its so fucking awesome 2 finish an episode & then receive so much trivia about it. fuck yes a little bowl of seeds for me (<- can't stop fucking saying that now!!)
I LOOVE the prime rifterssss i love fan created characterssss theyre so good!!! man. i love summer and doug. yeah even doug. also YEAH the reason he fucking thinks there's three summers is because he has FUCKING BRAIN DAMAGE from ONE MILLION CONCUSSIONS and JUMPING OFF A SKYSCRAPER and being EXPERIMENTED ON!!!!! NKDFKDFGHfgk. or at least. thats what i think.
i also thought he was gonna turn it into a wisp!!!!!!! i was so surprised when it didnt work... my assumption is that they were like, different variants of the same thing, whatever that thing fucking is. which. i guess is maybe not true!! wild.
FEELING INSANE OVER EPISODE 20. LIKE. IN GENERAL. joining charlie in a fucking ball on the floor tbh. what i will say before i spend like, a fucking week sorting through my thoughts & shit is that i do think they did a really good job w/ handling the addiction plot point... whenever anything like that comes up it really is always a crapshoot of like oh okay is this going to be unintentionally shitty to addicts. is this going to be wildly inaccurate. is it going to be ableist. etc etc etc. & i think the vague and blurry brushstrokes that they Did draw were really well done... more specific detail wouldn't have carried nearly as much weight as that description of their trashed rotting apartment & the way they reacted 2 seeing each other !!! wails and cries and throws up.
ALSO, the way his parents were killed feels like such a fucking missing piece slotting into place for his character? i had figured that-- ok i knew his parents were dead & i also knew he'd had.. personal experience with the um. violent and dangerous area of effect superheroism has. but knowing they were collateral damage in that umm. knockoff darkseid? darkstar? fight makes so much sense irt his perception of heroism & not wanting to be responsible for deaths. god.
& ummm i'm feeling fucking normal about "he sees dakota making it out of all this, he doesn't see that for himself." & "he doesn't see a point in the superhero thing anymore" like, we knew that already. but. doesn't make it easier to hear!! MORALLY AMBIGUOUS VIGILANTE WILLIAM WISP WHEN.
i have no idea who the bbeg is gonna be dude. oh my god. its gonna end up being fucking alan (allen??) or something. it's gonna be one of the s5. this is amogus now. anyway. GOOD EPISODE!!!
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douglas-rain · 6 months ago
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Top Five Douglas Rain Recommendations From Yours Truly
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You want to see more of Douglas Rain, but you're not sure where to start? Well, do I have the thing for you! As the internet's most preeminent Douglas Rain expert (except for Gerry Flahive I guess, but he's kind of slow at answering emails and more focused on other stuff these days. If he wants to reclaim the title, he can meet me in the parking lot <3), I've made you a handy little list of some of my personal favourite performances by DR that I think you should see and/or hear!
And by 'little' I mean 'I got way too into this, so it's pretty long now'. I put it under a cut; you're welcome.
In the interest of fairness, I've chosen one performance from each of his fields of work (namely: ON STAGE, RADIO WORK, DOCUMENTARY NARRATION, TELEVISION and FILM). Please know, however, that I can give reviews of basically everything in the masterpost, so if you're interested in hearing about any of them, feel free to shoot me an ask!
Without further ado, let's get into it...
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ON STAGE: Henry V (1966)
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Okay, this one's teeeechnically a TV movie, but it's adapted from Stratford's staged production, so I'm counting it. It's also a rare treat in that we get to see DR in colour! (Everybody say THANK YOU to David Rain, his son, for bullying the Festival into restoring this production and adding it to their online catalogue. I owe him my life.)
This is one of Shakespeare's histories, part of the Henriad (aka the collection of plays about the accomplishments of various English kings). Henry V, the main guy in this one, is actually the crowned version of Prince Hal from both parts of Henry IV, a role that DR had played previously at Stratford, so this is a fun bit of character continuity for him! The play centres around the king's invasion of France, with a lot of ruminating on hope and despair and duty and bravery. Harry - as he is affectionately referred to on occasion - is really going through it, and DR portrays him with such emotional intensity. He's proud, he's fierce, he's clever, he's a BITCH and I like him SO MUCH.
The book has been edited down slightly to fit into a two hour runtime for television, but beyond a few... very funny jumpcuts, it's not really noticeable at all. And while the sets are kept mostly simple, the costumes are gorgeous. I went in not expecting much (a mistake I keep making when approaching Shakespeare plays, for some reason lol), and was thoroughly entertained the whole way through!
It also contains the transcendentally funny line, "Tennis balls, my liege!" because Shakespeare was the most hysterical motherfucker on planet Earth. It makes sense in context, I promise.
Can be found on Stratfest@Home, the online streaming service of the Stratford Festival (there's a 7-day free trial period if you sign up). You may also check my masterpost of performances for a possible alternative, but shhh.
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RADIO WORK: Fifth Business (1980)
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I love this one; it's literally so fucking funny. This radio play is a dramatisation of the 1970 novel of the same name by Robertson Davies. Fifth Business recounts the life story of Dunstable "Dunstan" Ramsay, from his boyhood in an idyllic (on the surface only) Canadian village to his experiences in the First World War, his career as a teacher and all the loves and complications he runs into, and the formative experiences peppering his life where he's never quite the main character. He is instead 'fifth business' - neither hero nor villain, but still integral to resolving the play's plot. Ramsay is clever, sarcastic and a goddamn weirdo who's obsessed with saints for non-religious reasons. He dodged a snowball as a kid and the consequences of that haunt him throughout the entire book.
The radio drama features a whole cast of actors, including of course DR as the protagonist (who also narrates everything btw), doing an absolutely delightful job. Fellow Stratford actress Martha Henry, who also happened to be his wife at the time, is in it too!
The entire drama is delightful, honestly. I liveblogged my experience listening to it for the first time, and man there is some wild shit happening in this novel. The entire things is about three and a half hours, but it really doesn't feel that long.
Can be found (in eight parts) on YouTube or on Archive.org. (Or in a junkbox on a sidewalk in Toronto. I'm still baffled by that.)
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DOCUMENTARY NARRATION: Universe (1960)
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A classic. Documentaries make up a sizeable chunk of the masterpost (thanks to the NFB website and archive channels on YouTube), so there were more options in this category than in any of the others. But I decided to go with this particular gem of a documentary.
It's about - who would have guessed - the universe, featuring the most advanced scientific knowledge of planets and stars at the time. The special effects are also quite impressive - if you move around Space Odyssey circles, you may have heard that the visuals of this documentary were a major inspiration for 2001. Also, DR's narration in Universe is what brought him to Stanley Kubrick's attention. You can probably guess how that ended. (Gerry Flahive has some articles about the whole thing if you don't.)
Anyway, Universe is a beautiful and meditative look at our galaxy and the many things it contains, and DR's narration is absolutely lovely. It clocks in at just under half an hour, so not that big of a time commitment either.
Can be found on YouTube or on the NFB website.
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TELEVISION: William Lyon Mackenzie: A Friend To His Country (1961)
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It's so hard to find old Canadian TV shows anywhere online and I'm forever bitter about it. Our options here are incredibly limited as a result, so you're just going to have to accept that I'm recommending you a historical short film from 1961, alright? This is as difficult for me as it is for you.
Unsurprisingly, this movie is about William Lyon Mackenzie, who was... *checks Wikipedia* "a Scottish Canadian-American journalist and politician." Yes, DR is doing a Scottish accent in this role. Yes, I adore it. I know very little about Canadian history, so I can't exactly speak to the film's accuracy, but I found it charming and DR is doing a very good job. Most of the half hour runtime is spent on Mackenzie's various political struggles (some sort of failed revolution, I gather, followed by exile in the United States and some jailtime) and him trying to protect his family. His wife is played by Canadian actress Kate Reid in this movie, which I personally find very funny for... reasons. IYKYK.
Can be found on YouTube or on the NFB website.
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FILM: OEDIPUS REX (1957)
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I'm sort of cheating again, but the only other options in this category that I have access to are the two Space Odyssey movies, and they seemed like too basic of a choice. So have some more drama instead! This is also a filmed version of one of Stratford's plays, but released in theatres this time.
Oedipus Rex is a breezy 87 minutes and adapts the English translation by Yeats of the classic Greek tragedy by Sophocles, with a little added prologue to set the scene. It was directed by Tyrone Guthrie, who you might remember as the Big Man from The Stratford Adventure. Or from the fact that he was a pretty famous theatre guy. If you need a refresher on your Greek myths: Oedipus was the guy who was prophesised to kill his father and marry his mother. He got done dirty by Freud somewhere down the line.
DR plays the role of the Messenger, a minor part who recounts some of the most famous plot points of the tragedy of Oedipus, which they couldn't show onscreen/onstage. Granted, he's only in this one for like five minutes, but he really rocks up to crash the party wearing the coolest outfit in the entire show. And yes, everyone in this production is wearing Greek theatre masks, so you can't see his face. You get to hear his voice though - and watch his captivating body language!
Can be found on YouTube. Or you can probably buy it on DVD if you really want to; idk, I'm not the boss of you. (I've also clipped his scene if you really, really don't want to watch the whole play. I get it's a big ask. Really beautiful production though, seriously!)
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skeletalsepulchre · 10 months ago
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making a copy of this bc op disabled reblogs and i just got reminded it existed and would like to not lose it
ok so . im outing myself to the world but thats fine this is too funny to not share
so. ive run a roleplay blog for a few years. i keep it separate from my main, yknow, its just a side hobby and ive been doing it since i was like, 12. its cringe but hey yknow at least im not 30 and writing ya novels
now its pretty common for rp blogs these days to have rules. right? you dont want to just bag any weirdo on this website, and as you can imagine bnha roleplayers are batshit crazy (see: conversion therapy todoroki) so mine are pretty strict and detailed. because ive been doing it long enough to be exposed to what counts as carbon monoxide poison from a screen. one of those rules is "if youre mutuals with people who write porn of the kids even aged up im blocking you we're keeping a ten foot pole on this". because as a 20 year old man i have a healthy disinterest in seeing paragraphs of teenagers fucking
so the dash is astir with talk of a guy writing age up bakugou porn and im like ok whatever. make a post bitching about it . mutual likes those posts but then the mutual is turning around and being buddy buddy with this guy so i dm the mutual like hey whats going on here . mutual is like "well why dont you talk it out with him hes not as mean as he seems i prommy" and im like sure whatever i can have civil conversation and if it ends with One Less Person writing weirdo porn then i might be able to get into heaven
so i dm him and he loses his fucking mind. it lasted all of 10 minutes because he was sending paragraphs like this and i was too tired to give a shit
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(take note of my icon thats a special tool thatll help us later)
(also he goes by the name rxgelord. WITH the x. thats also important just because its funny as fuck)
so the guys clearly bothered by the idea that people might possibly talk about him without his permission and im a little miffed after being misgendered (which hed do again later) so i just post our dms. swing first and hey batter batter lets play ball i dont give a shit this is bnha roleplay
once again: loses his damn mind. he makes a psa post about me talking about how im just some pussy infant and hes too HARD for me and shit and also they do bakudeku muffin roleplay in the comments of that post which is fucking insane
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anyway. at one point while joking about the whole thing i called him a "wannabe bakugou kinnie" as a joke and apparently he felt a very serious need to address this
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and im like holllllllllllllly fucking shit
you may have noticed that his posts are incredibly over-formatted. this goes for everything he does he is pouring a LOT of time and energy into typing his 9 paragraphs about how im an insane bitch or whatever. (if theres literally one thing i can give him credit on its that his graphic editing skills are kinda good. i will be honest) his rules document is also just as insane and features gems such as:
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(this dude thinks hes pulling bitches on a bnha roleplay blog)
so we're just full on ragging on him at this point and hes getting MADDDDDDD MAD. he misgenders me again and when i point it out he has the following excuse:
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(art by @/pcktknife. anyways)
after a certain point i get dmd an old copy of a 130+ page callout he had a year prior and im like WHAT and it included his yugioh rp blog career and various allegations like having been involved in gang violence, doxxing, etc. also a picture of the hickies he bragged about leaving on his uwu pink glitter gf which looked more like he was trying to go for the killing bite but hey. yknow. apparently im a toddler idk how that works
along in this we also find his twitch account, which was under the name rxgelord, and it featured edited graphics of his real life face with bakugou. he posts selfies a lot too i wont share them even if theyre public but he has knuckle tats and a goatee and uses the greyscale filter. if this gives you an idea. he also had 5 twitch followers and detailed his desire to be a rapper/dj and im like holllllly fucking shit this guy cant be a real person. holy fuck.
anyways. skipping a lot of unnecessary bullshit and paragraphs of text with gifs from 2013 attached hes constantly going on about how we wont just "say it to his face" which i think is hilarious bc i was, the entire time. but im like ok fine you want me so bad
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so i send him this. he posts about how "he won when he got all might" (for some reason hes calling my ex mutual by the character name. i dont know) and then hasnt posted in 4 days. he deleted his twitch. im a little worried bakugou. dont say that. may have actually chased this man off the internet . to go have real life sex with his real life girlfriend so he isnt so mad
anyway we ended up turning one of his posts into an eminem uberduck
im honestly probably forgetting something this was so much and it was so fucking funny and honestly im glad to have been there
update: he has not in fact posted since last summer. god bless.
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sixosix · 11 months ago
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IM HERE. IVE ARRIVED. I HAVE THOUGHTS. when i said i might not come back here cuz i was busy? yeah, FUCK THAT. only divine intervention can keep me away from ur account. THE NEW THAWED PART?? WHAT THE FUCK. i wake up this morning expecting a chapter like, late afternoon but i forgot TIMEZONES EXIST . so u can imagine my absolute shock when i check my notifications bar and hit tumblr writer user sixosix posted new thawed part?? dude. the scream i scrumpt when lyney recognized the reader OH MY GODDDDDDDDDDDDDD. i knew it was over when the flower landed by her feet but him saying her name had me DSINFIDSJFJDS?!?!!??! DURING THE SHOW TOO. HE DIDNT WAIT UNTIL IT WAS OVERIJ DSJUFUDJSFIJDSAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!! even rereading that part now as i write has me going crazy like i cant even put my excitement into words its SO?!?!?w??VFDXJDVNDSFNC god. okay. the scene where he grabs THE READER BY THE WAIST. 'CAUGHT YOU' ????? YEAH AND I CAUGHT FEELINGS YOURE NOT SPECIAL LYNEY?? THE GRIP ON THE WAIST. AUUUUUUUGH. ARUEGJHHH. ARHGHHRJGFDKD... IM ON MY DEATH BED!! TAKE ME TO THE BEACH SO I MAY GAZE UPON THE SEA ONCE MORE!!!! the mr lyney. miss lynette. falls to my knees. dies. dies. dies. BUT GOD THE FACT THEY THOUGHT SHE WAS DEAD TOO? no wonder lyney chased after her !!!! if my girlfriend (one-sided (?)) turned up alive out of no where i would do the same fr. a real man would drop to one knee and propose right there (grow some balls lyney) LYNETTE!!!!! SO CUTE!!!!!!!!! IM GONNA BITE HER SOKFDOSAKDASIJD THE SLOW APPROACH LIKE A TIMID CAT AND THEN THE SMIEL AUHGHDJFSKJFD?!w?FDDJNFODSJKFND!!!!! i cant imagine how she felt finding her bff again im so AUUURHGHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!! i know she knocked some sense into lyney afterwards LMAOO also reader pretending to be working under tart... ohh i know thats gonna backfire on her later in the story. ALSO CHILDE MENTION YIPPEE YIPPEE YIPPEE!!!!!!!!!!!!! do i have my doubts about lyney and lynette believing readers lie? absolutely. you dont grow up with someone and not know when theyre lying.. especially lyney. have u ever watched barbie in the dreamhouse?? theres this episode where ken tries to get a job but he doesnt bc each time barbie has an emergency, so he just becomes a (barbie)house-husband.. thats the vibe im getting from lyney and reader the 'i'm happy to see you' from lyney, and reader (kinda?) dismissing it with the 'goodbye miss lynette and mr lyney' ????? AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH ??????? sending u the number and email to my therapist rn ure paying for my next session. also i love aether, paimons and readers friendship, especially their little banter at the end. ALSO. SIGH. reader calling rosalie maman. when i tell u i screamed i MEAN IT. THEY MEAN SO MUCH TO ME. I LOVE THEM SO BAD IM GONNA SOB!!!! ............im gonna say, im a bit paranoid though.. youre not gonna hurt rosalie right. righ.t Right. blinking at u. blinking at u. blink blink blink . BLINK. BLIIINK !!!!!!!!!! ok sorry for clogging up ur asks with this . i have no idea how to end this its so long LMAOO. there are so many other parts i loved (brief melusine scene, audience reactions, etc) but i just didnt know how to convey my feelings into words ifgjdifjdji. i love thawed and ur writing SOSOSOSO much and im so excited for future updates!!!!!!!!!!! THATS ALL I GOT TO SAY!!!!!!! ramble mode OFF!!!!!!!! BYEBYE AND TAKE CARE MUAAAAAAAAAH
HIII LIS!!!!! ohh seeing your asks rlly brighten my day. LMFAOOO your comment actually had me laughing out loud “I JUZT WOKR UP WHAT RHE DICK” HAHSA
YES. DURING THE SHOW!!! i want to emphasize that lyney did not care about the audience or the weeks of practice for this very moment if he sees the reader !!!! HELPPP nooooo dont lie on your death bed yet we still have a few more chapters to go through 💔💔
ONE SIDED GF 😭😭😭 IJBOL he definitely wouldve proposed if it wasnt for aether im telling u. YESSS LYNETTE APPRECIATION i love her so much i try to add her as much as i can bc her interactions w lyney are so fun. Theyre literally siblings 😭❤️❤️
CHILDE MENTION !! this is definitely gonna bite her in the ass later but hey thats for another chapter
YES I E WATCHED BARBIE DREAMHOUSE IMQHAHSHEH thats so funny that you said that im saving that as a screwnshot LMFAOOO
Yes i want to up the angst and pain. reader my self destructive thawed!reader … ❤️ but i also need the therapy please do send my number
Rosalie. rosalie, rosalie, rosalie. our maman. reader’s maman especially. Anyway.
AWW its okay!!! dont ever worry about your asks being too long !! i meant it when i said i love reading through them. THANK YOU FOR YOUR SUPPORT ❤️❤️❤️❤️ TAKE CARE TOO LIS MWA MWA
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