#ITS SO BEAUTIFUL

[moonspirit]

"The outside world must be ten times bigger than inside the walls!"

"The burning water..."

"The plains of ice..."

"The ocean..."

"And the fields of sands..."

"Eren, someday I hope we get to explore the outside world."

[burningvelvet]

A Roman doll with moveable joints and accessories was found in the sarcophagus of Crepereia Tryphaena, an unmarried 20-year-old woman. The sarcophagus is dated to the late 100s (2nd c. AD) making the ivory “Crepereia Doll” nearly two thousand years old.

[femstyles]

Every time I see those pics of the clouds showing liams tattoo I want to throw up. He's really everywhere now.

[yuria1]

Omg i'm ffn crying how have i just discovered this

Have you ever been to earth?

On earth, we use the word “burrito” to describe a tortilla filled with things you eat. Pretty simple stuff, and I’m surprised you at least got that part right. My burrito was, in fact, filled with food. In this, you and I agree and are friends. But this is also where my lifelong hatred begins for you and anyone else whose brain has been repeatedly scrubbed with the same mixture of bleach and Pop Rocks as yours has. Because that should have killed you, but left you around long enough to do what you did to me today. Let me explain:

You’re an idiot.

Let me further explain:

Burritos are eaten from one end to the other. So that means when you assemble a burrito with motherfucking ZONES of ingredients going that direction, you create a disgusting experience for the burrito’s end user. When you make a burrito, you should put the ingredients in layerslengthwise. That way, every bite has AT LEAST A FUCKING CHANCE of getting at least two types of ingredients, and there is little chance of becoming almost hopelessly trapped in a goddamned cilantro cavern.

Have you ever eaten one of the things you make all fucking day? You should try one. They are pretty good WHEN YOU ARE NOT WILLING YOURSELF THROUGH THE FUCKING EMPIRE OF SOUR CREAM ONLY TO END UP IN LETTUCE COUNTRY.

When you eat a burrito, you don’t stand it up and bite down on it lengthwise like a fucking Rancor. Humans can’t usually dislocate their jaws, and I’m not a fucking pelican. But you must think that’s how it’s done, since that would be THE ONLY FUCKING WAY to take a bite of your crapstrosity and have it taste like a burrito.

And guess what else, player? You probably can’t guess anything, because I’m pretty sure you’re just a mop with a hat on it that fell over and spilled some shit into a tortilla, but just in case, here’s what:

Humans also don’t eat burritos like fucking corn on the cob. Like a fucking typewriter from one end to the other a little at a time and then DING next line. But today I wish I had tried that. Because at least THEN I would be able to eat some rice, then beans, then be all like HEY BEANS I’LL BE RIGHT BACK JUST GOING OVER HERE TO THE GUACAMOLE FOR A SECOND.

Nope.

My experience was more like HEY BEANS IT’S JUST GOING TO BE YOU AND I FOR A MINUTE UNTIL I CAN FUCKING EXCAVATE THE RICE FROM BENEATH YOU BUT BY THEN YOU WILL BE A FADING MEMORY OH HEY I WAS WRONG I’M IN THE FUCKING CHEESEOSPHERE NOW RICE MUST BE NEXT I HOPE IT’S NOT ANOTHER FUCKING SALSA POCKET.

You built this thing like a fucking pack of LifeSavers.

And don’t even fucking think I’m about to open this shit up and re-engineer your nonsense 90 degrees. I ALREADY PUT A HOLE IN IT WITH MY FUCKING MOUTH. YEAH. THAT’S HOW I DISCOVERED YOU FUCKING SUCK AT LOOKING AT THINGS. I AM NOT GOING TO DO FUCKING TORTILLA ORIGAMI TO GET THIS SHIT BACK TOGETHER, ONLY TO END UP WITH A BURRITO THAT’S BEEN SHOT IN THE GUT AND IS BLEEDING YOUR INEPTITUDE.

What’s that? I should ask you to mix it up first next time? IS THIS JAMBA JUICE? I DON’T WANT TO DRINK MY FUCKING BURRITO THROUGH A BENDY STRAW, AND I DON’T WANT A PILE OF BURRITO SOUP IN A FLOUR CAN.

I just want a burrito.

In conclusion:

You’re the worst thing that has ever happened to the universe, you owe everyone everywhere an apology for this burritobomination, and I hope your babies look like monkeys.

UPDATE FOR EVERYONE WHO SAID “JUST EAT IT WITH A FORK”:

A fucking fork?

I DIDN’T ORDER THE FUCKING COBBURRITO SALAD.

If anyone ever handed me a burrito with a fork, THEY WOULD BE WEARING A BRAND NEW BURRITO HAT FROM MY FALL COLLECTION TEN SECONDS LATER.

That’s like buying a car and having them hand you a fucking wrench with the keys. Like YEAH WE KNOW THIS MOTHERFUCKER’S GOING TO EXPLODE AND BE SPREAD ACROSS EIGHT LANES AS SOON AS YOU HIT THE GAS, BUT SHIT, WE GAVE YOU A WRENCH, SO BE COOL.

Jesus already gave me two burrito forks. One at the end of each arm. They’re called fucking HANDS.

A fork. My god. I haven’t cried since I was six, but I’m fucking sobbing now.

People eat burritos with forks?

God is sorry he made us.

(Source)

[vorpalfae]

𝔱𝔥𝔢 𝔪𝔬𝔱𝔥 𝔡𝔯𝔢𝔰𝔰 𝔣𝔯𝔬𝔪 𝔱𝔥𝔢 𝔞𝔩𝔦𝔠𝔢 𝔞𝔰𝔶𝔩𝔲𝔪 𝔠𝔬𝔫𝔠𝔢𝔭𝔱 𝔞𝔯𝔱 ༺ᖭི༏ᖫྀ༻

[likeanageoldclassic]

babe wake up, high quality pictures of the new lover outfit just dropped

[futzfuck]

Me, talkign to my friends: yeah theres this neat action film coming out soon that dev patel stars in/wrote/directed, i hope its fun

Me, going into the theater: im ready to have a good time, hopefully this will be like bullet train and have some cool visuals and fun acting :)))

Me, exiting the theater:

IN THAT ORDER

[nic-coughlan]

[fleursscaptives]

okay i know alot of people dont like the 1870s and i find that so insane cause have you SEEN the hair

[ratatatastic]

"im excited to be here [in Finland]" is the understatement of the century matthew ill be real

Primetime Panthers | 11.6.24 (x)

[mirxzii]

jewish aesthetic <3

[misfithive]

OH MY GOD S1 S2 S3 - we finally have them all and it’s so perfect I could cry.

[crowholtz]

Strahd von Zarovich. Darklord of Barovia.

A beautiful piece I commissioned from @vampariart for my campaign's Strahd. Thank you so much 🖤🦇

[scarringstars]

TEN YEARS OF THE 100 ↳ favorite quote

[katsettee]

Absolutely fucking insane about all of them

When I tell you it’s so good it’s so good

This too like 10 mins i just needed it out of my system

[justporo]

Based on your oneshot Shooting Stars

I kid you not that my reaction to this was: BURYING MY FACE IN A PILLOW AND SCREAM BECAUSE THIS IS SOOO BEAUTIFUL!!

How do you keep doing this oh my god, I feel so honoured and so grateful, your art is so wonderful and beautiful I would like to eat it! Thank you so so much, darling, I will hold this very close to my heart, along with your other pieces you blessed me with!