#IT'S TOO FUCKING GOOD
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opening tears of themis right after playing love and deepspace for hours
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by WalkerPugShirts on etsy
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Some things never change: meddling grandparents/overprotective parents edition
Between Mrs. Sedley and her daughter there was a sort of coolness about this boy, and a secret jealousy—for one evening in George's very early days, Amelia, who had been seated at work in their little parlour scarcely remarking that the old lady had quitted the room, ran upstairs instinctively to the nursery at the cries of the child, who had been asleep until that moment—and there found Mrs. Sedley in the act of surreptitiously administering Daffy's Elixir to the infant. Amelia, the gentlest and sweetest of everyday mortals, when she found this meddling with her maternal authority, thrilled and trembled all over with anger. Her cheeks, ordinarily pale, now flushed up, until they were as red as they used to be when she was a child of twelve years old. She seized the baby out of her mother's arms and then grasped at the bottle, leaving the old lady gaping at her, furious, and holding the guilty tea-spoon.
Amelia flung the bottle crashing into the fire-place. "I will NOT have baby poisoned, Mamma," cried Emmy, rocking the infant about violently with both her arms round him and turning with flashing eyes at her mother.
"Poisoned, Amelia!" said the old lady; "this language to me?"
"He shall not have any medicine but that which Mr. Pestler sends for him. He told me that Daffy's Elixir was poison."
"Very good: you think I'm a murderess then," replied Mrs. Sedley. "This is the language you use to your mother. I have met with misfortunes: I have sunk low in life: I have kept my carriage, and now walk on foot: but I did not know I was a murderess before, and thank you for the NEWS."
"Mamma," said the poor girl, who was always ready for tears—"you shouldn't be hard upon me. I—I didn't mean—I mean, I did not wish to say you would do any wrong to this dear child, only—"
"Oh, no, my love,—only that I was a murderess; in which case I had better go to the Old Bailey. Though I didn't poison YOU, when you were a child, but gave you the best of education and the most expensive masters money could procure. Yes; I've nursed five children and buried three; and the one I loved the best of all, and tended through croup, and teething, and measles, and hooping-cough, and brought up with foreign masters, regardless of expense, and with accomplishments at Minerva House—which I never had when I was a girl—when I was too glad to honour my father and mother, that I might live long in the land, and to be useful, and not to mope all day in my room and act the fine lady—says I'm a murderess. Ah, Mrs. Osborne! may YOU never nourish a viper in your bosom, that's MY prayer."
"Mamma, Mamma!" cried the bewildered girl; and the child in her arms set up a frantic chorus of shouts. "A murderess, indeed! Go down on your knees and pray to God to cleanse your wicked ungrateful heart, Amelia, and may He forgive you as I do." And Mrs. Sedley tossed out of the room, hissing out the word poison once more, and so ending her charitable benediction.
Till the termination of her natural life, this breach between Mrs. Sedley and her daughter was never thoroughly mended. The quarrel gave the elder lady numberless advantages which she did not fail to turn to account with female ingenuity and perseverance. For instance, she scarcely spoke to Amelia for many weeks afterwards. She warned the domestics not to touch the child, as Mrs. Osborne might be offended. She asked her daughter to see and satisfy herself that there was no poison prepared in the little daily messes that were concocted for Georgy. When neighbours asked after the boy's health, she referred them pointedly to Mrs. Osborne. SHE never ventured to ask whether the baby was well or not. SHE would not touch the child although he was her grandson, and own precious darling, for she was not USED to children, and might kill it.
-Vanity Fair, William Makepeace Thackeray (1848)
#vanity fair#william makepeace thackeray#the guilty teaspoon#flung the bottle crashing into the fireplace#may YOU never nourish a viper in your bosom#may He forgive you as I do#I can't#it's too fucking good#😂#file under:#me when I found my MIL giving the child bread when we specifically told her no gluten
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this is the episode where untucked wins an emmy
#bitch i cannot handle this#it's too fucking good#oml i am screaming#anetra and sasha just sitting back and observing#mistress stirring the pot#OOOOOOOOOO
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this is just my opinion but i think any good media needs obsession behind it. it needs passion, the kind of passion that's no longer "gentle scented candle" and is now "oh shit the house caught on fire". it needs a creator that's biting the floorboards and gnawing the story off their skin. creators are supposed to be wild animals. they are supposed to want to tell a story with the ferocity of eating a good stone fruit while standing over the sink. the same protective, strange instinct as being 7 and making mud potions in pink teacups: you gotta get weird with it.
good media needs unhinged, googling-at-midnight kind of energy. it needs "what kind of seams are invented on this planet" energy and "im just gonna trust the audience to roll with me about this" energy. it needs one person (at least) screaming into the void with so much drive and energy that it forces the story to be real.
sometimes people are baffled when fanfic has some stunning jaw-dropping tattoo-it-on-you lines. and i'm like - well, i don't go here, but that makes sense to me. of fucking course people who have this amount of passion are going to create something good. they moved from a place of genuine love and enjoyment.
so yeah, duh! saturday cartoons have banger lines. random street art is sometimes the most precious heart-wrenching shit you've ever seen. someone singing on tiktok ends up creating your next favorite song. youtubers are giving us 5 hours of carefully researched content. all of this is the impossible equation to latestage capitalism. like, you can't force something to be good. AI cannot make it good. no amount of focus-group testing or market research. what makes a story worth listening to is that someone cares so much about telling it - through dance, art, music, whatever it takes - that they are just a little unhinged about it.
one time my friend told me he stayed up all night researching how many ways there are to peel an orange. he wrote me a poem that made me cry on public transportation. the love came through it like pith, you know? the words all came apart in my hands. it tasted like breakfast.
#warm up#writeblr#actually this is because again i don't go here#i don't read/write fanfic but i have nothing but respect for my troops#but i also have never played minecraft. im sorry. please ask me any question about pokemon tho i love that shit#anyway#out of some banal and thoughtless curiosity i watched the minecraft movie trailer#and again i know nothing about minecraft. i am aware im in an endangered population#but im watching this going: this is so fucking.... BAD#there is NO LOVE in it!#like if someone who has NO history in minecraft watches that and is like - ohhh this is soulless#WHO IS THE AUDIENCE????#ppl who love minecraft are gonna hate it!!!#at some point it's the ''mean girls musical movie'' problem --#some people will always hate the premise of what you're doing and some people will love it#make it for the ppl who love it#and usually that somewhat convinces the haters to like. chill enough to TRY it . bc it IS good#but when you try to make it for the haters..... nobody likes it. it doesn't have passion. energy. footwork#which is a small way of saying a big thing: if you love something. fucking make it and assume someone will love it too.#i love u . be brave . be bold. be in boston and come to my reading#where i wrote a really weird fucked up little book.#love u love u love u etc
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"I think this Category of human being is disposable" okay that not only sucks and is fascist but also makes getting you to deem someone to be disposable a simple matter of convincing you they're in The Category regardless of the truth. Also The Category is often misapplied to a vulnerable minority because it makes people like you agree they're disposable.
"Anyone who disagrees with me about The Category of people being disposable is a Category apologist or probably also in The Category themselves" Oh so you're just totally unconcerned with truth or justice or ethics or human rights and just are feeding your bloodlust for the sake of revenge fantasies. got it 👍
#“I've solved it! We just kill all the Bad People so all the Good People can live safe happy undisturbed lives 🥰” That's Fascism.#If your solution to wrongdoing is to just kill evryone who's Too Evil then your only problem with concentration camps is who's in them#“The world would be a better place if *I* was in charge of who lives and who dies.” That's Not Very Fucking Leftist Of You.#Your only problem with the evil empire is that you're not in charge of it. Your politics are a joke and your ethical backbone is liquid.#problemnyatic thoughts
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HAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
#I FUCKING KNEW HE'D MAKE A CAMEO#as soon as i saw mat i started SCREAMING laughing#no mark cameo though :( sad#fnaf movie#fnaf movie spoilers#text post#fnaf#fnaf spoilers#matpat#the fact that his nametag says ness too. the fucking earthbound character#THE EASTER EGGS IN THIS MOVIE WERE SOOO GOOD#listen as an og fnaf fan....im thriving#not super into the series anymore but WOW this movie really catered to my high school age self lol
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Part of the reason that Republicans are so desperately acting like they will never lose again is because they are deeply terrified that this is their last real chance to win. The big orange dipshit came in and gutted the party of everyone who wasn't a loyalist, which left it full of nasty little gremlins who have gaping voids where charisma and human decency is supposed to go.
They still hold a lot of power, but if we stop them this year the next presidential election may not be the Most Important One Of Your Life™, that's not a guarantee or anything, but if they don't win here and now their future looks grim, this dipshit is the only guy they have left and he's extremely diminished and has his brains leaking out of his ears at this point. We can beat him into the ground.
So that's what we're gonna fucking do. We're gonna break these fucking fash. They will crash upon us and we're gonna break their fucking necks. When they come for us they will lose because they're fucking losers and we have each other's backs which is something they fundamentally are incapable of comprehending.
#We will fight them on the shores in the trenches etc etc etc#I know it's been said before but the people who said it were right to beat back fash for whatever else they weren't right about#Fuck these fucking little bastards who want to rule our fucking lives and destroy our communities#They've got too much power as is and right now is our moment to crush them and take it back#If you're not into Harris fine work to kick the GOP off your city council they're shitty little gremlins there too I guarantee it#(Hell if you're in LA there's two good chances to swap a shitty Dem for a good dem on the council)#But it's time to fucking break their necks and if we do it here the worldwide movement of these fuckers is gonna follow#Not because we're particularly special but because our fascists are pretty large exporters of the stuff#A loss for them is going to shred their party this unholy alliance is already fraying between the fundamentalists and the tech ghouls#Let's magnify that shit for them by making them eat it.#Don't mind me I'm just sick of these fucking ghouls and ready to make them suffer for what they've tried to do#All implied violence in this post is metaphorical ;)
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Yes, I’ve done the work analyzing this relationship’s problematic traits and I’ve come to the educated conclusion that I still want them to fuck
#Erik/Christine#phantom of the opera#shipping discourse#Entrapdak#poto#my experience with Entrapdak fits this too#I’ve done the reflecting#looked at the pro vs anti sides like a good academic student#and my conclusion is that they still have the stronger connection#therefore I’m going to enjoy indulging in them sucking and fucking unapologetically#you can not tell me otherwise
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I feel, personally, like not enough people focus on the fact that in this iconic big tiddy moment
Falin is. Splattering someone’s brain on the pavement like a fine ragù.
Splat.
#dungeon meshi#delicious in dungeon#falin touden#not that anyone’s gonna read this (and just know I know it’s all in good fun)#I never said this was *bad*#I. too. wish to be fucking cheesegratered on the cobblestone between her big fuckoff scaly toes#the maizurusplat just caught me off guard the first time I watched it#I hadn’t seen anyone highlight the gore. mostly the gorgeous animation 🥰#peace and love y’all. hoping for everyone to get turned into their pasta sauce of choice by a big scary chimera lady
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my sister finished her first bg3 run, here's evil gang reunion photo <333 (withers invented polaroid for the occasion idc)
#bg3#baldur's gate 3#shadowheart#minthara#astarion#tav#oc: viivi @artharakka#he keeps the photo in his wallet too lol<3#they're everything to me your honor i lov them severely#i stg gang so good#not Morally lmao#but so delicious n ride and die...#it truly felt like survival simulator#and lemme tell u.. these bitches Lived💯‼️#(and yes selûnite shadowheart in evil gang it's how we roll babey🙏)#they all said fuck everyone else in their own way
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*Wayne Manor, Family dinner*
*Barbara’s phone rings*
*she leaves and comes back a few minutes later, expression solemn*
Dick: what happened
Barbara: the Joker is dead
Jason: *shocked silence*
Tim: *shocked silence*
Damian: *shocked silence*
Alfred: *shocked silence*
Like a dozen other more: *shocked silence*
Bruce: *leaves the room*
Dick: Bruce!
Alfred: Master Bruce what-
Jason: *looks away, clenching his fist*
Bruce: *returns, with a bottle of champagne*
Again: *shocked silence*
Tim: why’s there a note on that saying: “For when the Joker dies”?
Bruce: it was a gag gift from Harvey when he was… you know, less murderous
*not so shocked, more of a hesitant silence*
Jason: *stands* pop it open, old man. I’m bringing the glasses
Alfred: the help is much appreciated, Master Jason
Steph: how did he die?
Barbara, a little confused: my dad said something along the lines of… a bunch of fans manifesting it after the writers were cowards for too long?
#bruce wayne#barbara gordon#cassandra cain#damian wayne#dc universe#dcu#dick grayson#jason todd#the joker fucking dies#Harvey Dent & Bruce Wayne friendship#good parent bruce wayne#aka the only Bruce Wayne that makes sense#i have a post about that too#unapologetical self-promo#the power of the fandom#start manifesting it might actually happen#stephanie brown#alfred pennyworth#waynefamily#batkids#Batman
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Few DnD scenes will ever be funnier for me to imagine than Riz Gukgak fully fucking submerging himself in lava and Kipperlilly revealing herself just out of pure and utter shock
#i laughed way too fucking hard at this#brennan’s face when murph told him he was going in#so good#and just ‘what the fuck???!!!’#iconic#fantasy high#fantasy high junior year#fhjy spoilers#riz gukgak#kipperlilly copperkettle#dimension 20 fantasy high#dimension 20
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“I hate the script, the vault dwellers sound so cheesy—“ my Brother in Steel you realize that’s the point, right? They were bred to act like the physical embodiment of an HR e-mail. Did you not catch the memo that Vault-Tec put out regarding their experiment facilities?
#fallout#fallout tv show#fallout tv series#they were raised to respect the Golden Rule they’re a bunch of fucking kindergartners#theyre MEANT TO BE CRINGE#plus if you keep watching you’ll SEE WHY THEY DO THAT#don’t quit in the first episode when you have so many more to explore wtf is wrong with them!!! it’s a good show!!!#sometimes I think people like to hate things just to hate them and I understand. truly. i am a certified hater too#but don't dog something that has reasoning!! you're meant to cringe! and you'll see why!!!#GIVE IT TIME IT WILL MAKE SENSE I PROMISE#fallout spoilers
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probably time for this story i guess but when i was a kid there was a summer that my brother was really into making smoothies and milkshakes. part of this was that we didn't have AC and couldn't afford to run fans all day so it was kind of important to get good at making Cool Down Concoctions.
we also had a patch of mint, and he had two impressionable little sisters who had the attitude of "fuck it, might as well."
at one point, for fun, this 16 year old boy with a dream in his eye and scientific fervor in heart just wanted to see how far one could push the idea of "vanilla mint smoothie". how much vanilla extract and how much mint can go into a blender before it truly is inedible.
the answer is 3 cups of vanilla extract, 1/2 cup milk alternative, and about 50 sprigs (not leaves, whole spring) of mint. add ice and the courage of a child. idk, it was summer and we were bored.
the word i would use to describe the feeling of drinking it would maybe be "violent" or perhaps, like. "triangular." my nose felt pristine. inhaling following the first sip was like trying to sculpt a new face. i was ensconced in a mesh of horror. it was something beyond taste. for years after, i assumed those commercials that said "this is how it feels to chew five gum" were referencing the exact experience of this singular viscous smoothie.
what's worse is that we knew our mother would hate that we wasted so much vanilla extract. so we had to make it worth it. we had to actually finish the drink. it wasn't "wasting" it if we actually drank it, right? we huddled around outside in the blistering sun, gagging and passing around a single green potion, shivering with disgust. each sip was transcendent, but in a sort of non-euclidean way. i think this is where i lost my binary gender. it eroded certain parts of me in an acidic gut ecology collapse.
here's the thing about love and trust: the next day my brother made a different shake, and i drank it without complaint. it's been like 15 years. he's now a genuinely skilled cook. sometimes one of the three of us will fuck up in the kitchen or find something horrible or make a terrible smoothie mistake and then we pass it to each other, single potion bottle, and we say try it it's delicious. it always smells disgusting. and then, cerimonious, we drink it together. because that's what family does.
#this is true#writeblr#warm up#relatedly for some reason one of our Favorite Jokes#amongst the Siblings#is like - ''this is so good u will love it''#while we are reacting to something we OBVIOUSLY find viscerally disgusting#like we will be actively retching and be like ''nooooo it's so good''#to the point that i sometimes get nervous if someone outside my family is like oh u should try it its good#(obvi we never force each other to eat anything. we are all just curious birds and#like. we're GONNA try the new thing.)#edit to answer why we had so much vanilla:#my mom is a very good cook and we LOVE to bake. so she just had a lot of staples in the house.#it's one of those things that's like. have u ever continuously thought ''ah i should get butter im probably out''#even tho u are not out of butter. so u end up with like 5 years of butter.#my mom would do that in a costco but like with vanilla extract#to be fair we WERE always using WAY TOO MUCH bc we were kids#so like she was right to stock up#ps. yes we were VERY sick after this lol i just didn't want to include it in the post in case ppl had an ick about that#u can tell it's real bc we knew "oh no we fucked up that's too much vanilla to waste'' but our reaction was to just. keep drinking it#> sibling understanding that vanilla extract isn't free > knowledge mother doesnt mind if we use it for milkshakes#> sibling choice to maybe get in a loophole of ''not wasting it'' if we drink it bc that's the same as using it (not throwing it out)#listen bud i was like 13 and my sister was like 9#when my mom discovered this we. got in. A LOT. of trouble. a lot of it. a LOT of it.#3rd edit bc i guess it isn't clear - i am 1 of my brother's 2 little sisters#i am the middle child#out of all the ways i have had to explain a post before being like ''did u forget a middle child can happen'' is my favorite
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To the people saying "Jason wouldn't have jumped into tartarus for Piper, like Percy did for Annabeth" as a way to demean him. Jason, plunged into the sky from the grand canyon to catch Piper in the first few pages of the lost hero without even knowing who she was, and without the knowledge that he could fly. so he basically jumped to his death attempting to catch her. In the first few pages of his journey, he didn't mind dying to save Piper, and ironically, that's also what he did in the last few pages of his journey. Y'all just be making the most out of pocket claims abt jason fr
#If you think you're complimenting Percy by saying “Jason wouldn't have done that” no you are not. I love Percy too but cmon now#You are simply deluding yourself by trying to antagonize Jason in your head because of pettiness#He is canonically a sweetheart through and through so go cry abt it with your made up fanon version of him#But don't you dare claim it as canon#Get over the fact that both Percy and jason are good people and loyal lovers#Stop comparing them for fucks sake it's not 2012 anymore#pjo#percy jackson#pjo fandom#pjo series#pjo hoo toa#pjo hoo#jason grace#annabeth chase#piper mclean#leo valdez#frank zhang#hazel levesque
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