#IT'S LIKE SEASON ONE CUTENESS BUT DOUBLED (OFC)

[astudyintheburningofhearts]

THE HEARTSTOPPER SEASON TWO OFFICIAL TRAILER HAS ME IN NEAR TEARS OK.

[kajibunny]

⟡˖ ࣪ ren kaji as your boyfriend ₊˚⊹⋆

✿ summary: relationship headcanons (ren kaji x reader) ✿ warnings: awkward silliness, some parts are a lil suggestive ✿ a/n: i love this man so much you don’t understand pls ;__; hi i'm new here and ofc my first post is abt my love, ren kaji hihi pls be nice!! ✿ wc: 960

ꕤ kaji is more than just your bf, he’s also your bff, partner-in-crime, and sometimes guard dog (lol).

ꕤ he’s a little mean, but he means well. 

ꕤ everyone in town refers to you both as each other’s “other half”, as he relies on you quite a lot. not because he wants to boss you around (well, well, iykyk second year grade captain ren kaji mode on) but because he immensely trusts you.

ꕤ you also rely on him a lot, and he is a very protective boyfriend. he won’t let anyone harm a single hair on your head if he can help it.

ꕤ lots of people thought you two were already together way before you two actually got together, since you two were always…well, together. to the point that you adapted each other’s habits and vocabulary. (you catch yourself picking up kaji's direct tone of speaking and occassional "damnit!") no one was at all surprised when he introduced you as his lover. to everyone, you two were practically married already.

ꕤ it’s either both of you are bantering or play fighting one second, then all over each other the next. if ever you two have serious arguments, he’s usually the first one to apologize and ask how he can make it up to you. kaji is very mature that way, and is scared of hurting you, as he treasures you with all his heart (and body lol).

ꕤ has this habit of putting his lollipop in your mouth - just to see what you would do. loves the faces you make when you least expect it. thinks you’re so cute like that, but of course, will never admit it out loud. 

ꕤ when agitated, he calms down when you give him head pats and tell him that he’s a good boy. (double meaning i’m telling you)

ꕤ his love language is definitely quality time! he loves hanging around with you, walking home together, having deep talks in high places like a grassy hill or rooftop until the sun rises, listening to music together while you lean on his shoulder absorbing the sound from his headphones.

ꕤ your pet names for each other are lowkey insults like “idiot, dumbass, stupid” but affectionately. it became kind of like an inside joke between the two of you. he’d say the sweetest things, then pair it with a completely opposite word, like “it’s because i love you…you fool.” and you can't tell whether he wants to fight you or if he wants to kiss you. 

ꕤ kaji likes having collaborative playlists with you. doesn’t matter if you two don’t have the same music taste, since he’s always curious about what you’re listening to. sometimes sneaks in a few hidden messages using song titles in his playlists, for your eyes only.

ꕤ during the cold season, he lets you slip your hands in his hoodie pockets, embracing him from behind, like he’s your natural heat pack.

ꕤ when sleeping together, he’s a (literal) freak in the sheets. a blanket and pillow hogger, takes up more than half of the bed, ends up in the strangest sleeping positions, and at times accidentally pushes you until you end up on the floor. 

he definitely does not mean it though, if you hug him or hold him tightly while sleeping, there’s a higher chance he’ll stay still.

ꕤ when not on the bed, kaji likes to take naps on your lap or your shoulder, because according to him “it’s comfy and soft. like a pillow”

ꕤ lets you hold his valuables - lets you wear his hoodies, lets you hold his headphones, lets you drink from his bottled water, and even lets you suck on his lollipop (the one in his mouth okay but maybe also sometimes the one in his pants asdjbjdjcnd;;) but only you are allowed, because you’re special.

ꕤ you had to learn basic first aid because kaji always ends up with many injuries after fights, and gets angry at anyone who tries to touch him or disinfect his wounds, except for you. (soft!kaji *sighs* the effect you have on him aaaa) 

ꕤ makes a barrier with you in his arms whenever you’re passing with him in a crowded or busy street, to make sure no one bumps you or gets too close to you, to keep you safe.

ꕤ kaji is naturally such a good kisser, but claims he doesn’t really know what he’s doing. he tells you it’s just because he’s eaten a lot of lollipops, so he probably practiced unknowingly with his mouth and tongue. (help this is so funny)

ꕤ so many awkward and cute moments, that makes you love your little idiot ren kaji more and more each day (if that’s even possible) 

accidentally bit your hand when you fed him food. (from that day on, woke up to the realization that he might have a little bit of a biting kink)

once tried to do a kabedon on you like you two saw in one film you watched together but ended up tripping a bit, landing on top of you and squishing you.

there was a time he asked for love advice from hiragi when you two started dating, and umemiya ended up eavesdropping on them, and kaji ran away so fast as if he saw a ghost (ref: ch 58 kaji-senpai lol)

forgot he was wearing his headphones with music on full blast and broadcasted a little too loudly about how much he missed you because “you were gone on your trip for so long” and he “wanted to kiss your annoying face” all in front of his giggly vice captains, who of course heard every single thing he said. you made sure to tease him a lot about it afterwards.

© kajibunny 2024 / all rights reserved

[gonetoforks]

Introducing; Yuichi Usagi-Cuddles!

There’s a slight typo in his basic character bio, (first, grey image) other than “yuich,” his family in America lives in the part of the hidden city under Jersey. He lives in Jersey. He’s a Jersian. So in terms of leosagi, it’s gonna be an enemies-to-lovers comedy-of-errors muahahahaha!!

More (a LOT more) info about him as his own guy under the cutoff :D ⬇️

Basically; He’s a silly guy! I feel like his kinda buffoonish, embarrassing personality in canon is simultaneously PERFECT for Rise’s writing style & grievously underrated in fanon depictions. So he’s this clownish type of character, haha.

Okay, time to go hyperfixation mode.

Adhd & his stubborn attitude;

He has ADHD! Executive function issues makes it hard for him to start tasks & manage himself, so he relies on his teams (the Mad Dogs when he’s training & the Rise equivalent to his canon friend group on his own time) to not only instruct him, but also hold him accountable & keep him on task. He’s body-doubling without even realizing it.

Although, he resents the things he does to accommodate his disability. He doesn’t notice that doing the things he does genuinely helps or why so he thinks he’s using them as a crutch because of incompetence. Every time he gets stubborn and ignores the things he needs to do, he crashes and burns. When he was new in town with no teacher & no friends who liked martial arts, he became a huge sad sack until the kraang invasion.

His character arc is about being able to rely on other people & accommodations. That relying on a bit more help than other people doesn’t make you incompetent, choosing to seek out the support you need so you can do your best is the true mature thing to do. I was inspired by canon Yuichi’s struggles with paying attention and Rise’s themes of cooperation. (& also my own experience with adhd and learning with executive function issues & junk)

Relationships w/ the turtles;

The Mad Dogs agree to let him like, intern with them? So he can see what it’s like to be a vigilante, they offer him advice and they occasionally go on low to mid-tier missions with his help. They take him on cause they think more heroes and allies out there, the less work they have to do haha. Also, one of the writers mentioned a season 3 would have them adjusting to being ~official heroes,~ I think this would be them trying to be “real.”

He’s closest friends with Mikey out of the whole group! (Adhd solidarity) Then it goes Donnie -> Raph -> and finally Leo (for now muahaha)

I tried to give Leosagi an interesting dynamic with constructing his character like this; They have similar insecurities from drawing self-worth from technical capabilities that they can develop past together, but Leo is clever and calculating about it vs Yuichi being rash and impulsive. So like smart x stupid but they’re the same actually.

His Family in Jersey;

He speaks english fluently because he’s visited his American family frequently his whole life, they’re very close. He has an accent though since he mainly speaks Japanese.

I haven’t fleshed out this concept enough, but I think members of his jersey/Cuddles half of the family would be spoofs of characters from the original yojimbo comics, implied to be reincarnations? Except Miyamoto ofc. (i’ll explain later..)

Reusing the ninja orphans plotline from the original show, his family utilizes their cute appearances to run an orphanage too. They wonder why this Chizu lady is constantly showing up with unhoused children, but they’re just grateful they’re safe now.

Everyone in his family HATES Mrs. Cuddles, they all think she’s in prison and are happy about it. She might’ve given him that scratch on his face.

Additional;

He is gay.

Thank you for your time.

[octoberautumnbox]

Happy Anni-box-sary!! :DDDD

Whew! It's been a year since I've started writing on this platform (and in general fsgsdjkfghjadskfh), and what a wild ride it has been. Ups and downs scattered throughout the year, but I really wouldn't have it any other way :uwuge:

All that said, let's move onto the box 2024 recap!

Yuri fics I've written: 8

Fly in the Night Trip

Love in the Night Train

Juicy Juicy

Friday

Adrenaline

Enjoy

I Got All I Need

Like It Like I Love It

buncha drabbles I didnt count, some of them fluff, some of them angst, all of them box 📦‼

Yuri fics other people have written: 6

@fillinforlater's Friends that can Keep a Secret

@birchleavesdawn's Bitter Taste

@xshadowdelta's Former Manager pt. 1: Back in Town

@usedpidemo's Cruel Flower

@prael's Reality

@leafostuff's Operant Conditioning

Non-Yuri fics I've written: 11

in my best attempt not to double count when there was more than one idol in the fic (lmao),

1 for soloist Chaeyeon

1 for Kiss of Life

2 for woo!ah!

2 for tripleS

2 for Kep1er

3 for fromis_9

Funnest fics to write:

Hell Week: despite not doing sins's prompt justice, I really did enjoy how I built Yubin and OC's character, even as the writer i fell in love with how sweet Yubin came to be, and while I do think the sex could have been fluffier, i do like how i wrote the ending :DDD

Cute and Caring Noona from Apartment 424: i think deep down inside i knew the apartment thing was gonna come back, even at the time, though i had to promise myself it wouldn't be a series. Yujin and Xiaoting are still a killer duo i'd love to write but it wouldn't fit that well with what i've decided on what the apartment fics will be, instead i'm going with the direction that The Sultry and Pervy Soda in Apartment 307 went and go from there

Like It Like I Love It: EASILY my top 1 from this year. it was everything reader box would have wanted in a yuri fic: a casual relationship, a possibility that there's something more in it, hot sex (literally), and just the right amount (maybe a bit too little) of showing off babygirl yul. i really hope this isn't peak box but going back to why i started writing in the first place, which is that i wanted to see more quality yuri fics, this was something that if i were still a reader would have sated me for at least another year. good job box!

Idols/Groups I've come to know:

Kiss of Life: I think they debuted before me? I noticed Natty first bc ofc I did 😭 but quickly fell in love with how Bobsky just vibes so well with them aaaaaaa

tripleS: I started paying attention around Girl's Capitalism but I knew of them since Generation. I still know only like ten of them and still need to look up whether they're of age or what number S they are but I've written the group thrice now so worth :DDDD

Kep1er: zozi was tough for wizones and I'm not exception, so there was a lot of animosity to this group starting out. I only really started loving this group because of choiyuj, and it was me falling in love with that tiktok that cookies n seggs noona was ever made and it's been upwards ever since

Collabs:

One Heck of a Joyride with @leafostuff: simultaneously this took way too long and not long enough LMAO we started in Feb and released in May, if u can remember Best Job Ever and Like It Like I Love It came out in May too so that was hectic for me. but it's my first and to date only long fic and I hope someday to surpass it in terms of word count and idol nuguness :sitt:

Prompts:

@i-am-lifeform24's Curated Companions: this first major prompt I took part in, where I wrote Dito Muna Tayo :nolookk: it got me attention I didnt know how to feel abt (I still don't tbh) but it was a major step in the right direction to temper my expectations of myself: it reminded me to write for me

@msafterhours's Seasons: this was a major L for me jfkgjslahhf I wrote A Little Goes a Long Way, misunderstanding the prompt "Seasons" for "Seasoning" and making a cooking fic instead. it was a great laugh with him tho, and a memory I come back to fondly

@mintwithchoco's Favorite Song: I wrote Orange-Tinted Sunset with Sticky in mind but promising mint I'd break Belle's heart lmao, at the time my current favorite song switched from that to Nothing and it all just fell in place. I had the idea a long time ago for Haneul but this was the perfect chance to broaden my horizons yet again, and to my dismay it proved @0cta9on right that I kinda was okay at all three genres of fics that touched on after all :bearlazy:

Growth:

can't remember if I said it out loud on the tl but im not a serious writer! that just means that I dont consciously aim to improve how I write and I'm totally fine with the skills and style I have now, and any exp gained or skills learned is has been passively achieved

that said, I'm really so so happy with Fly in the Night Trip and Love in the Night Train. In my first ever fic i said i wanted my next work to be a smut, and that i would be able to write more of what i wanted on my blog soon. Enjoy was both of those, and i even got to write so much more of my ult bias throughout the year and then some. you could call it self-serving, or as @capslocked so eloquently put it, unconsidered readers, all of you. :sitt:

thats why im really happy to be able to come full circle with another fluff in Love in the Night Train, because i feel like it concludes such an awesome year in such an awesome way. id tell 2023 box that just keeping at it wouldve worked out so well, but the extra effort to write just a tiny bit better, to listen to @midnightdancingsol's advice, to stick with it even though work fucked us up (and still does) is going to be well worth it

Hiatuses: 2

ok obviously im not as proud of this one. but each time i did, it was me reevaluating how I run the blog and what sort of stuff I'm getting myself into. it was well worth taking a step back from writing and just figuring out what exactly I wanted to do, and the breaks did wonders for how I paced myself.

these were me asking myself questions that struck the very core of how I conduct this cacophony of a kpop smut blog. it made me aware of arbitrary rules I was holding myself to, and gave me a chance to do away with them. everyone has to clear out their inventory every once in a while, and these were mine :DDDD

Everything else:

ive stopped tracking notes bc I learned since I occasionally write nugu and non-smut to never expect 100+ and I'm always pleasantly surprised when I get there slfjglah but yeah, there's better things to keep track of like what I did above

these are what really matter to me: yuri, writing, and the community i've become part of. while I do think the 1022 club is a fun milestone to celebrate, anything else is a bit more work than i care to make a separate post about (except maybe on bluesky lmao)

at my core, im a glassy, a true fan of the little ball of sunshine that is jo yuri. i keep saying that as long as im able to make one of you lovely readers a fan of her too, i'll know i'm doing good! so to all you box followers, all you honorary glassys, please tune in to yuri! she just released her tenth(!!!) OST entitled Spring Days Pass, will appear in Squid Game season 2 which premieres on Dec. 26 on Netflix, and is bound to have a comeback lined up soon :cuteplead: please join me in supporting her! :DDDD

Aaaaand that's it I think? A wild ride for sure, and I'm happy to have spent it here doing what I love. Hopefully all you readers also show greater support to my fellow writers and friends on here, and as always, stay tuned for more box fics in the future!

Thanks for reading, and see you all in October Autumn Box season 2!!

[comphy-and-cozy]

Andrei Svechnikov Masterlist

gif credit to @pyotrkochetkov | divider by @benkeibear check out my full masterlist here! * = smut (18+ ONLY)

ONE-SHOTS

Sundress Season* (Andrei Svechnikov x Reader) - 4.3K Being a Staal sister, you’ve seen your fair share of cute hockey players, but none that have struck you like Andrei has. What will happen at the postseason summer barbecue at the captain’s house? Ruin Me* (Andrei Svechnikov x Reader) - 2.2K The long awaited sequel to 'Sundress Season': Andrei takes his captain’s little sister on a first date.

Glittery* (Andrei Svechnikov x Reader) - 4.7K The holidays are an important staple in your relationship, and this year, you’re at the top of Andrei’s wishlist.

The Mystery of Love* (Andrei Svechnikov x OFC) - 11.8K Boston University senior Vivian Adams is the quintessential Miss Terrier - President of her sorority and star student, with big aspirations waiting for her as soon as she crosses the stage at graduation. What will happen when she gets paired with her ex-boyfriend and BU’s hockey star, Andrei Svechnikov, for the biggest project of her college career? College AU.

The After Party* (Andrei Svechnikov x Reader x Brady Skjei) - 6.3K When your new fling Andrei invites you to his joint birthday party, you’re surprised to learn that it’s a past flame who shares his birthday. And surely a double birthday calls for a double celebration — even if that means that you are the gift.

The After Party II* (Andrei Svechnikov x Reader x Brady Skjei) - 6.3K A year after your illicit tryst with your current fling and your ex-fling, you meet again.

Every Summer Has a Story* (Andrei Svechnikov x Reader) - 11.5K When you find yourself on vacation with an ex-fling that barely had time to get off the ground before disaster struck, you might find you're in more than you bargained for.

GASLIGHT* (Andrei Svechnikov x Reader) - 5.4K A dance of desperation, destruction, and desire with the man who broke your heart.

BLURBS

✿“Fuck you.” “When?” / “Are you trying to turn me on or are you really just that oblivious?” | illicit affairs* (sequel) ✿Smokin’ with Svech ✿New Endeavors* ✿A Kiss to Distract ✿Goal Celly*

[oneforthemunny]

okay SO. i know i don't even go here, i'm a janitor!eddie girlie BUT i feel very strongly about hockey!eddie because he's insane but also so dumb and i love dumbasses. anyways. i was reading what you said about him being grossed out by his teammates when they cheat and i had this idea so i wanna share it with you

imagine, if you will, that reader becomes really good friends with another hockey wife. young couple, maybe they recently had a baby and reader is obsessed, eddie is obsessed because omg my girl with a baby why is this awakening something in me, it's all very cute. double dates type of shit, maybe this is the first time reader has felt included in the wives and girlfriends club! and then eddie's teammate cheats on his wife and reader finds out. she's DEVASTATED because that's her friend!!!! that's her adopted nephew/niece!!! why would that asshole do that??? so ofc she goes and tells eddie and eddie is LIVID. next day at the locker room eddie breaks his nose or something lmao

god this is so sick and so good because i feel it. like i can see it so vividly.

she finally gets into the group, feels apart of it, and is enjoying herself. plus, she's with this other wife, who seemingly has made it work ya know? husband still plays and she's with him, but also has a balance to her life and schedule, and a baby??? it's like everything reader has wanted, and she's seeing someone have it, and it gives her hope. like all these fears, they're silly bc this can work!

eddie's close with the teammate, but not the most close, bc they're on opposite sides (defense and offense) so they don't really practice and play as much. but still, he likes him, thinks he's a cool guy.

they all get super close, especially during off season, and hang out all the time. guys got a wife, a career, a baby? he's older, been traded before and kinda takes eddie under his wing. truly, they're very very fast friends.

then they go out one night. maybe they had a press thing to do, or a team meeting, decide to go for a beer after it.

eddie's thinking nothing of it, they're sitting at some bar or club or whatever, and next thing he knows, there's two girls?? the guy had called them?? he kisses the one girl in greeting and eddie is immediately sick to his stomach. floored, shocked, disgusted, hurt- all of the above.

he leaves, right there. no warning, nothing, just leaves. is visibly shaken when he tells you later, rambling, eyes wide, just perplexed.

i feel like he wouldn't jump right into beating him. you both talk and are like "no way, there's no way, right?" maybe they're in an open relationship? maybe they swing? maybe they're freaky like that?

so eddie tries to talk to him the next day about it. "i know you'd never do that, man. i'm sorry. i just, i kinda freaked."

but his teammate doesn't reassure him. doesn't tell him that his wife knows. he kinda gets quiet. "i mean, no, she doesn't know, but she really doesn't need to. now does she?" he kinda shrugs. "i mean, we just had a baby, and ya know, she's so tired all the time. it'd be shitty of me to ask her."

eddie is, once again, sick. jaw dropped, he can't even speak, he's so fucking sick. "plus the road gets lonely. you know what i mean." the teammate continues. "look, i love my wife. i don't think there's anything wrong with getting a little something every now and then. it's purely physical. i wear a rubber, get what i need, and come home and keep them happy. i mean, what's the point of causing issues in my own marriage, when i could do this? take care of it."

"you don't think fucking around on your wife is causing issues in your own marriage?" eddie sneers.

"no." he scoffs. "not unless she finds out. what she doesn't know won't hurt her, right?" he shakes his head, shrugs it off nonchalantly. "look, kid, i get it. you're in love right now with your girl. it's all about her and nothings better, and that's great. for now. then you'll want a little more, and, hey, there's nothing wrong with that. it's biologically encoded in our dna as mammals to need more than one mate. monogamy, it's barbaric. and you'll understand. one day... you know, shit won't look the same, feel the same, and you'll-"

that's when eddie breaks his teeth. knocks him clear out, his coaches and team mates running to break it up, confused why there's a fight on the sidelines? no regrets from eddie. he got fined, had to run suicides until he threw up, but it was worth it. knocking that piece of shit out, totally worth it.

[inconsideratekidney]

10/17/24

hey gamers,

i wanna be a gamer, i wanna be up in here gaming on a thursday afternoon, double-monitored up, hella snacks.

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yoohoo big summa blowout. it's fall and it's amazing. loving my sweater moments because i exist in sweater weather. it is a time for seasonal depression, but also for cute and bulky sweaters! my favorite accessory. I consider them accessories because they are very much a part of my outfit. i am my outfit. i am the main attraction. just kidding...the sweater is the main attraction, i'm not that egotistical...

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anyway....i don't have much to say to be honest. i have talked to people and had my fill of spill-ing out my brain. i am content with my state of mind right now (i have no big assignments due tonight or tomorrow night). i am stressed about next week with 2 midterms and more big work coming in.

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the adhd brain is such an interesting thing--how can one be so distracted and yet not be able to distract oneself when necessary? trauma is one thing, but intrusive thoughts are so dumb and stupid. why have a brain if it can't function well enough to do what you tell it to do?

figures, i have so much on my plate and so much death in mind. my uncle's, my friend from high schools--which makes me think of the students last year who died and all others, and liam payne from one direction???? like what???? that's crazy. i can't strip that down for him the same anymore. wtf. like i can't take death in general, but this one is so different. it's like when cameron boyce died. so young and so out of the blue. i was shocked when i heard the news and it's just so terrible. fucking TMZ, ofc they posted a partial picture of his body, like wtf. no composure/demeanor like my interpreting gang knows. just odd behavior.

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i am into watching House MD and honestly it's so interesting. my mom was on general hospital and dr. quinn medicine woman, which i'm sure no one knows about and probably one other show i can't remember, but i am into House right now. i like the dynamic, for now, and might get sick of it soon, though, cause i've been watching it a lot lately and might be overindulging. it's whatever. the show is witty and informative. i enjoy seeing the ways that the doctors develop their personalities and i wish there was a bit more drama relating to each of the doctors, but it's mainly about house and his group of doctors. oh shwell. maybe i am more into drama hospital shows than i thought. my youtube shorts feed sure thinks i am (and i keep liking them). i hate algorithms sometimes.

i have been instagram-free for a couple of years now! and tik tok free for some handful of months! but i am terribly addicted to youtube shorts.....

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rock, paper, scissors, says shoot! i picked scissors what did you pick

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give me good recommendations for a laptop. i will bother everyone about this. i want a good computer that runs windows. pretty pls. my computer is giving me such a headache and i hate it. just anything with windows and that is somewhat light and somewhat cheap pretty pls. :prayer hands:

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rawr. i am the evil tiger of the wicked west. i will be taking all of your cookies. mwhahahhhahhaahhaha. om nom nom. they're mine now and in my belly. mmmm mmmmm. yummy.

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i need a brain break. rahhh hiyaa.

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tips on how to go insane?

step one: exist

step two: do life

step three: repeat.

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td:lr?

um, not much folks.

not much this time

gamer

(sweat)er

talking and death

house md and addiction

lappytoppy

mushy brain

sanity

need a break, goodnight

kD :3

[rosesradio]

i just saw your reblog on a portwell post about gina saying “was it really over if it never had a chance to start” when her & ej were dating for two months and firstly i want to say all ur points were so true but especially the one about how there was “forever after that” in rina only double the amount of time into theirs and to add to that, there was also the thing that gina literally embroided the words “i love you too ricky” in the hat she gave to ricky two months into KNOWING HIM. like i think the rina moments are cute and such but stuff like this feels so dumb on the writers side 😭 there were honestly so many points in the later seasons where i felt like the writers forgot what they had previously written in past seasons, sometimes i felt like i was watching a whole new show purely because of this like make it make sense!! it also just feels like double standards for the ships too bc wdym portwell “never got a chance to start” when they were already two months into their relationship but then gina already felt sure about her romantic love for ricky two months into knowing him at all?? (that detail was probably something the writers came up with during the s4 writing which is a whole other conversation and ofc feelings vary person to person but still ??) that’s just my two pence but god portwell were done so dirty that was rough for us 😭

god...exactly...it's me & my two hsmtmts mutuals against the world because you're literally so right

seasons 1 & 2 of the show feel like an actual like. show. season 3 feels like someone got drunk & started posting a bullet point list of things they wanted to happen (me) but they had horrible takes (not me).

season 4 was just fanfiction. which is good & fine & stuff, but comes with inevitable retcons & some ooc-ness that was acceptable to rina fans, bit ultimately was just a wildly different show than seasons 1 & 2. also, shows should not devolve to the point of seeming like fanfiction because that should be kept separate from the source, but yk

[mikaela-granger]

The Long Wait Chapter 22

Woman in Black Part 1

Fandom: Grimm

Pairing: Sean Renard/OFC

The Long Wait Masterlist

A/N: We are on the home stretch of Season One, only one more chapter left before start on Season Two.

For the rest of June, Lorelei mainly worked, spent time with Katie, her friends and her family, as well as Lorelei’s own friends and family. She had officially introduced Katie to Monroe and Rosalee. Although she was a bit apprehensive about meeting a blutbad and a fuschbau at first, the decision to have them meet on neutral ground (a restaurant) was a good one. Monroe and Rosalee didn’t help at first, taking on the roles of protective older brother and sister, however they did warm up to Katie pretty quickly, much to Lorelei’s relief. On their way home, Katie was in agreeance that Monroe and Rosalee would make a cute couple. It wasn’t lost on her that Lorelei had indirectly brought them on a double date.

Lorelei has also ended up adopted a bonded pair. A ragdoll cat called Daisy and bernese mountain dog called Molly. Juliette had recommended them to Lorelei. Their owner was moving into a nursing home and wanted them to be rehomed together. Lorelei had met with their previous owner, who was devastated about giving away her beloved pets. Lorelei had spent the day with her and the animals, with Mrs Jennings deeming Lorelei perfect. There had been a lot of tears on the day Lorelei had picked them up, but Lorelei had promised to bring them for visits. Daisy and Molly settled in pretty quickly, which Lorelei was grateful for. At least they would have each other when she was away.

The Fourth of July saw Lorelei spending the day with Katie for the eisbibers party. She was a very popular person. Everyone wanted to speak with her. Thankfully, Bud rescued her a few times, telling them not to ‘hound the poor girl’. Katie’s little brother Reggie and Bud’s youngest Patty stuck to Lorelei like glue, inviting her to play and dragging her to meet their friends. It was a long day, but Lorelei had fun. She wasn’t used to the sense of the community the eisbibers had, but she loved it.

There were not a lot of wesen related cases, until a recent one that hit close to home for Monroe as it involved the death of some of his friends and a psycho doctor. For about a week, Portland was abuzz with tales of Bigfoot, even with the police assuring people Bigfoot had not come to Portland. Nick was a little concerned, because Hank had encountered Monroe in blutbad form and seen the psycho doctor shift from wesen to human form as he died. He mentioned it when the three of them met up for coffee one day.

“Has he said anything?”

“No, but I can tell there’s something not right.” Nick replied.

“Hanks got to be shook up about this in some way.” Monroe said quietly. “You know whether he’s talking about it or not, when I saw him looking up at me, he was freaked. It’s a look I’ve seen before, I’ll tell you.” He paused. “I’m sure you’re hoping it’ll just go away, and he won’t say anything, and look this is not like your ordinary nightmare, ok? He knows he was awake, and his brain is trying to process the unprocessable.” Monroe looked at Nick and Lorelei. “I mean, what did you think when you first saw one woge?���

“I thought I was going crazy.” Nick replied, he looked at Lorelei.

“Same. I thought I had cracked.”

Monroe nodded. “Right, well, Hank’s probably going through the same thing, you know?”

He took a sip of his drink. “With you it was one thing.” Nick said. “He was hit, he was knocked out, he was a little dazed. But he saw Brinkerhoff change.”

“That is so not going to make it any easier.” Monroe said. “Trust me, mental hospitals are chock-full of people who have spent their lives trying to wrap their minds around things they’ve seen and can’t explain.”

“Great.” Nick said, putting his mug down, not looking happy.

“But Nick, with Hank, maybe it’ll be different, you know?” Monroe said, trying to make Nick feel better. “Hank’s a cop, he’s already seen crazy stuff. With any luck it’ll wear off in a couple, three years.” He trailed off, looking out the window.

“I have a crazy idea.” Lorelei said. “What if we told Hank?” She held her hand up to stop the boys from speaking. “Hear me out, Hank’s your partner, he’s getting involved in this stuff anyway. It may be useful having him in the know.”

“I’m not sure.” Nick said slowly, as Monroe said, “That is not a good idea.”

“Hey, it was just a suggestion. We don’t have to decide now.” Lorelei defended herself. “It just bugs me that Hank is going through this alone. I remember how scary it was, and I only had to deal with it for, like, an hour before I got home to Aunt Marie.”

Nick patted Lorelei on the arm. “I know. And I will consider it.” Nick told her.

“Why don’t we change the topic?” Monroe suggested. “Someone has a birthday coming up soon.”

Lorelei rolled her eyes as Monroe waggled his eyebrows. Nick just shook his head, as he finished his coffee.

Lorelei couldn’t stop thinking about Hank and what he must be going through. She knew she wouldn’t say anything unless she got an ok from Nick, especially as he should be the one to tell Hank. By some twist of fate, Lorelei ran into Hank the next morning outside a café.

“Baby Burkhardt!” Hank greeted her warmly.

She raised an eyebrow. “Baby Burkhardt?”

Hank laughed. “Yeah, its what Wu started calling you.”

Lorelei shook her head and rolled her eyes. “How are you? I heard about the shooting. Are you ok?” Hank’s expression changed and he got a far off look in his eyes. Lorelei cursed herself ‘Great job, genius’. “Hank.” She said gently touching his arm.

Hank shook his head and looked back at Lorelei. “Sorry, I must have spaced out.”

“No, I’m sorry. That was pretty callus of me to ask.” She said. “Of course you’re not completely ok.”

Hank gave her a small smile. “You were just being kind. I appreciate it. And I’m ok.” Lorelei just gave him a look. “Damn, Nick wasn’t kidding. You do have a Mom look.” He said with a laugh.

“Nick says I have a Mom look?” she asked in confusion.

Hank nodded. “Yep. Said it made him confess to things in the past, things he wouldn’t usually tell you or anybody.”

Lorelei laughed as well and gave a shrug. “I suppose that would explain some things.” She paused. “You know, I was going to grab a coffee, did you want to join me?”

Surprisingly, Hank agreed. After getting their coffee, they took a stroll in a nearby park. It didn’t actually take that long for Hank to open up, especially about what he had seen. Lorelei was surprised, as they didn’t know each other that well. “I’m crazy, right?”

Lorelei bit her lip. “Well, crazy is subjective.” She said, sipping her coffee as she tried to figure out what to say. “We have a couple of things that could be happening.”

“Do tell.”

“One, what you saw is a combination of both a possible concussion coupled with trauma, and two….” She trailed off.

Hank was watching her intently. “And….”

She looked directly at him. “You aren’t crazy, and you actually saw what you saw.”

Hank shook his head. “You’re messing with me.”

“No. I’m not.” Lorelei said, her tone serious. Hank looked back at her. “Look, I’ve been taught to always ask questions, about the scientific method and so forth. But I like to think I’m open-minded. I don’t discount something just because it seems impossible. Humans know more about space then they do about the ocean. There is so much we don’t know.” She paused, wondering how much to give away. “Don’t tell Nick, but I’ve seen some weird shit. Things that can’t be explained by science. Things, like what you are describing.”

Hank stared at her. “Really?”

“Really. I first saw someone’s appearance change a couple of years ago. At first, I thought I was crazy, that I was loosing my mind. But then I saw it a few more times, on different occasions, different people. And they never looked the same. Some did, but not always. I still do.”

“And you still don’t think you’re crazy?”

Lorelei shrugged. “Sometimes. But like I said, there is so much we don’t know. Although farfetched, I was open to the idea that there are people who exist, who are different, that can change their appearance. And think about it, historically, society isn’t very kind to people who are different or don’t meet their own preconceived ideas of what is normal. The Witch Trials, Indigenous peoples, people of colour, or those with disabilities. People who are different who have been treated horribly for things they can’t change. People who are just trying to live their lives.” She shrugged again. “Maybe I am crazy. But for the most part, I ignore it. I did initially take to the internet, but there are a lot of weird people on there.”

Hank laughed. “That is true.”

“Hank, you can make a choice. Accept what you saw was part of trauma and a head injury or accept that maybe there are things in this world we can’t explain. And you met a couple of them.” Hank was silent, seeming to mull over what Lorelei had said. “It’s easier said than done but accepting the second one is a lot easier. Believe me. It makes you feel more prepared for when you see it again.”

Hank nodded, still silent, until his phone rang. “It’s Nick.”

Lorelei nodded understandingly. “Ah, duty calls.”

Hank stood up. “Thanks Lorelei.” He said, shooting her a smile. “I don’t feel completely better. But, knowing I might not be alone. It helps. A lot.”

Lorelei stood up as well. “I’m glad I could help, even if it’s a little bit. And uh, don’t mention this to Nick. He worries enough as it is.”

“I promise.” He said, giving her a short hug before walking off. Lorelei watched him go, hoping she had done the right thing.

As she was heading home, Lorelei got a message from Sean, inviting her over for dinner. Biting her lip, Lorelei contemplated what to do. She really wanted to go, but being alone, in his apartment. She wasn’t sure if that was a good idea. She had a girlfriend, a great girlfriend. And hanging out with Sean was not like hanging out with Monroe. She knew without a shadow of a doubt that Monroe and she were friends, siblings even. But with Sean, she really wasn’t sure. She knew that she was attracted to him, but she didn’t know where she stood with him. Eventually, feelings won out and Lorelei agreed to the invite.

As she walked toward the elevator in the parking garage, she ran into Sean. “Hey, fancy running into you here.” She joked.

Sean smiled at her. “Indeed.”

“I’m just going to take Molly for a walk, have a shower, and then I’ll be right up. Should I bring anything?”

Sean shook his head. “Take your time. And just your charming personality.”

Lorelei laughed as they stepped into the elevator. “I don’t think Nick would agree with you about that.” She commented.

“Yes, well, you are his annoying younger sister.” He joked, pressing the buttons for both their floors.

Once they reached her floor, they went their separate ways. Lorelei made her way to her apartment and grabbed Molly before heading out. Lorelei didn’t want to keep Sean waiting and tried to keep it short, however Molly was being difficult. First, she wouldn’t move past the dog park near her apartment, so she decided to spend some time there. Then, she wouldn’t leave the dog park, and finally, Molly decided to sniff out every street corner on the way home and spent some time doing so. Once she got home, Lorelei headed straight for the shower, taking note of her phone, charging on the kitchen counter. After a shower, she fed Daisy and Molly, before grabbing her phone and heading out the door. As she waited for the elevator, she checked her phone, surprised to see a bunch of missed calls from Nick. Shaking her head, she sent back a text that she was busy tonight and to bug Monroe. The doors opened and Lorelei was surprised to find herself faced with three officers of the Portland PD.

“Baby Burkhardt.” Sergeant Wu greeted her. “Great, we found one of you. I thought you youngin’s were always on your phones. Your brother has been trying to call you.”

Lorelei frowned. “What’s going on?”

“Officer DeMarco will explain everything.” Wu said, gesturing to one of the officers. He stepped out of the elevator. “You haven’t by any chance seen the captain?”

“Ahh, about an hour ago. He was just getting home. Why? What’s wrong?”

“Thanks Baby Burkhardt. Be good for Officer DeMarco.”

The doors closed, leaving Lorelei and Officer DeMarco alone. She stared at him expectantly and he shifted uncomfortably. “Why don’t we take this inside? I’ll tell you what I know.”

Turns out, Officer DeMarco did not know a lot. Just that they had orders to check in on her and Sean, as apparently a murder victim had been following them, Nick and Hank. They found pictures on his camera. There were concerns that whoever had killed their victim was coming after them. Lorelei was pacing the living room, while Officer DeMarco stood by the door. During one pacing session by the window, Lorelei noticed flashing lights. She stopped and looked closer. It wasn’t a patrol car or an ambulance. She saw two figures walking into the building. It was far away, but she recognised the walk of one, Nick. Now she was getting scared. What if something had happened to Sean? After a while, Officer DeMarco’s radio went off, calling for back up and an ambulance to Sean’s apartment.

“I’m going up there.” Lorelei said, marching towards the door.

Office DeMarco stepped in front of her. “I can’t let you do that Baby Burkhardt.”

Lorelei glared at him. “Is everyone calling me that?”

Officer DeMarco shrugged. “Yeah, pretty much.”

She tried to walk past him again, but he stood his ground. “Look, we don’t know exactly what is going on up there. But I have orders to keep you safe. Please don’t make my job harder.”

Lorelei huffed and crossed her arms. “Fine, for now. But I want to know if Captain Renard is ok. He’s always been nice to me.” Nice was one way of putting it.

Lorelei walked back over to the window, waiting to see if an ambulance arrived as well. Eventually, she did see an ambulance arrive, along with a few patrol cars. Some more time passed, and she kept bugging Officer DeMarco. It was only after she gave him what Hank referred to as the Mom look when he gave in and escorted her upstairs. On the way up, she heard him advise that they were on their way up. He also made Lorelei promise to follow any order she was given.

Next Part

Taglist: @zoexme

Banner by @cafekitsune

[therhythmafterthesummer]

Hiii dear 🫶🏼 hope everything is going well and you're sleeping well and staying hydrated ✨

Today I was bored at work and I had a few thoughts (about wr ofc what else)

1. How is the gingerbin wedding planning going? Do they agree on what they want so far? Any specific preferences from any of them? (Idk if you plan on including something like this in future wr installments if so nevermind djehwkdj)

2. Do the wr couples sometimes go on double dates? Like maybe kitten and minho join gingerbin in their gym dates? Or prettyxchris and Hyunlix and moss go out to eat sometimes? It'd be so cute 🥺 they'd be swooning and teasing each other about their couple habits as if they aren't all huge simps

3. Do they celebrate Christmas too? Because I had the thought of them decorating their apartments or a christmas tree together and I almost collapsed 😭 they'd be so playful and excited and imagine Chris picking pretty up so she can put the star on top of the tree (while holding onto those thighs obvs)

Imagine Chris curled up around her in wolf form so he can keep her extra warm right next to the Christmas tree I- 😭😭😭😭😭

Oh and also, pack family Christmas dinner 💖 I just love them lmao

- 🍒

they're still trying to decide on a traditional-ish wedding and a wedding on the beach. they argue over the menu and flowers sometimes, but they agree on which outfits they'd wear for the two possible settings, as well as some favours they want to gift their loved ones. they're leaning more towards a small wedding (which isn't that difficult considering Changbin is no longer in his family's pack--although his family will be invided-- and considering Autumn has gone no contact with her family bc she defected her former pack). overall, pretty normal stuff :D

i'd like to think they do! although maybe not as often as you might think. it is pretty common for the three alphas and their partners to go places together though (although i'm not sure if they'd consider trips to buy furniture for chris' house "a date"). moss and hyunjin have gone on a few double dates with pretty and chris, whereas moss and felix tend to go with gingerbin to the gym a bit more frequently~

i don't think the wereroomies characters are religious, but i think they do like to celebrate every possible holiday they can together, so i can see them celebrating christmas! imagine how chaotic a secret santa would be in that pack sdfjhskfhdkj (also, 100% chris lets pretty climb on his shoulders to place the star on the tree. it's a win for him). i'm sure they take the cutest seasonal pictures too 🥺 both in wolf and human forms. i'm sure pretty has this pic of her and chris (who shited into his wolf form) sitting by the christmas tree wearing santa hats sdjhfksfhsdkjf

[m1ckeyb3rry]

No because the character design >>>> I also LOVE KIJA SHSHSJSHS man I miss yotd….

Also OMG CHERRY TREE PT 2 commentary after I finish replying

OOOOH omg a long series for bllk…(we all chant KARASU TABITO in the background…) but omg yeah I can only imagine the amount of research needed for hollyhock’s setting shsgshsb

Omg waittt zantetsu switch up?? Ok but I mean if you still want to write for Karasu…I’m always ready for a brainstorming thought dump session….only if you want though LOL

HOLELDHDS SHIT THE BAROU ONE??? Ok im ngl the chokehold that edits to that song have on me….idk why something about the beat and “melody” ushsjshsj also LMAOO THE WOMANIZER ONE classic Otoya edit…ok but the nagi ones are fire and I can also see why you were converted by that rin one…

Ok but if you have any especially fire Karasu ones don’t be shy…I almost never see edits of him it’s so sad

LMAOOO if you ever write that you NEED to add that line in there it’s so perfect (Karasu and Yukimiya trying to protect the girl at first is so real and so cute I can only imagine the rollercoaster ride of mishaps that would happen in this story LMAO)

LMAOOO BAROUISM SO REAL THOUGH?? Yes fortunately he’s basically locked in for the rest of the series!! Excited to see him again soon after the PxG match!! Also curious by what role he’ll play in the current epinagi match too! But omg wait nagi Barou and Karasu all together epinagi said welcome to the miraverse

Ok COMMENTARY: RAGAHHDH THAT WAS SO GOOD lowk you do a really good job of like developing stories and plots that when I read it I didn’t even feel like it was “short” or shorter than fwtkac…like just perfectly paced *chefs kiss*

Also 1) SEABIRD Y/N MENTION LMAOOOOOOO 2) omg stalker Rin was lowk so funny he really said “yeah idk what to say so I’ll just follow you silently like a creep” DHHSSHSH I also love how the roles kinda flip and Rin now has to wait for y/n…also the trees THE TREES >>>>> tree imagery and hidden messages my fav I also love awk but mature Rin like it’s still clumsy soccer nerd Rin but the development is there!!!

Another Mira banger excited for whatever’s next!!

- Karasu anon

i wouldn’t say kija is a top fav (shinah and hak are my beloveds) but i’ve seen some GORG fanart of him so i def see the vision there ☝🏻

cherry tree part two 🥹 i wanted it to be a surprise because i never mentioned working on it but LMAOO it was so funny i saw that rin edit WHILE WRITING WILLOW TREE so it was like a double whammy dose of itoshi broism that made it even worse 😭

tbh as much as there’s so many characters i want to write a long fic for it’s only the ones i DON’T like as much that i get ideas for 😭 like i got the idea for hollyhock while trying to come up with something for NAGI so we’ll see what happens and who ends up inspiring me but it’ll definitely be a surprise…honestly i think i need to pick the au first and THEN decide which character feels natural in it instead of vice versa if that makes sense

LMAO i will hold off for now but if that changes i will let you know!! i’m sure i’ll come up w something because i lowkey have no zantetsu ideas sooo…dumb characters as much as i love them are not my favs to write as love interests because i would simply never fall for a dumb guy irl so it breaks my immersion while writing somehow 😭

THE BAROU ONEEEEE it fits him so well too somehow!! hehe nagi edits are always so good because he has so many scenes in season one plus soooo many fire manga panels that editors have a LOT of material to work with!! and otoya LMAOAO he’s so goofy i love him (surprisingly not aiku though…idk why i can get behind eita but not aiku even though both are cheaters?? like looks aside ofc 😭 maybe it’s because we actively see aiku being weird in the manga whereas it’s only referenced in the egoist bible for otoya so it doesn’t feel as in your face)

OKAYYY tbh there’s not a lot of variety in karasu/otoya edits because they don’t really have any anime scenes yet but here are some i have saved!! fair warning you might’ve already seen these because like you said there’s not much out there for them…

karasu + otoya

karasu

karasu + barou 🤩🤤

you didn’t ask for him but YUKIMIYA

otoya edit using his 0.02 seconds of anime screentime

EASILY the most famous barou edit it has over one million likes and almost twelve million views so you’ve almost definitely seen it but i’m including it anyways because barou…lowkey flash warning though LOL

NO BECAUSE IT’S SO GOOD like the worst man she’s met (oliver aiku) taking her under his wing and teaching her how to be a player meanwhile karasu and yukimiya are yelling at otoya to leave this poor innocent girl alone and otoya is just like “wow…y/n has beautiful eyes…” too chaotic fr

BAROUISM FOR LIFE i’ve liked him since i first watched the show but he was typically overshadowed by me loving nagi and then later karasu so it’s only fair he gets his chance in the spotlight 🤩 omg but also the way nagi is the only hair gel free man in the miraverse top three LMAOAOA he’s holding down the fort fr 😩🙏🏻 needs to impart some wisdom to karasu and barou af

OMG YAYYY I WAS WORRIED IT WOULD BE TOO SHORT although tbh i don’t worry too much abt word count with sequels because like the main story is long enough…okay lowkey secret fact i hope i don’t keep getting a ton of pt2 requests because i love leaving stories open ended and doing a pt2 takes away from that 😩 like that’s why i don’t want to write a pt2 for white butterfly even though multiple people have hinted at wanting one LMAOAAO i just think it ended in a place where expanding it would feel like i was mansplaining to my readers almost 😭 i def think that’s a personal preference too a bit because i personally love reading open endings like they’re so good at making you think and leaving the story on your mind…tbh the impact of an open ending is UNMATCHED it doesn’t have the same vibe when the ending is like fully written out idk if that makes sense ANYWAYS rant over back to commentary!!

LMAOOOO SEABIRD Y/N MENTION FR sae finally put a ring on it ‼️ yk that was the most chaotic proposal ever too 😭 i just thought it would be funny to connect the two stories since there’s nothing rlly saying they CAN’T be connected plus since bllk did kinda vaguely and probably exist in cherry tree (y/n doesn’t go to japan until her freshman year of college so like 18 years old?? and rin would’ve just turned 19 because september birthday so it’s three years after bllk began which is why he isn’t on lockdown) it’s hilarious to imagine like rin being all emo and needing to destroy sae or he’ll die and giving these long ass dramatic monologues abt how sae is his ultimate goal meanwhile sae is just eating sandwiches on the beach with his gf

STALKER RIN MY KING i wanted to show that no matter how much more mature he is it’s still the same awkward fumbling soccer loser rin we all know and many love 😭 like bro has no clue what he’s doing he left his country with a university name, nagi’s sweatshirts, and a dream 😩🙏🏻 and somehow it worked out for him but like imagine y/n transferred or graduated early or smth HAHAA he would’ve been cooked 😰

i’m glad you liked it 😄 hehe i had fun writing it this was def one where i didn’t mind the part two it was very cutesy and enjoyable to do 😫 i have nine requests on my list that i need to finish up so it’ll be something from there ig!! not sure which req i’m going to do first 🤔 there’s a couple that are the same vibe as the isagi ones where i could def finish them in 1-2k words so i might try to get those out of the way first just so they’re out there and i feel productive!!

[sorryimananti-romantic]

HAHA YES WELCOME BABES HOPE YOU ENJOY YOUR STAY GJFHKDG

not you roasting joong and praising his leadership in one breath fdkghdffkjg

ALSO STUFF YOU FOR POINTING OUT THE SHEEPS i always make that mistake and always catch it and regret it later AHAHAHA

yes dom hongjoong taking it out on the reader in the form of some spicy stuff DID I NOT TELL YOU OOPS (surprise bbygorl)

yes hehe exploiting ppl is like the first thing you must do as an aspiring politician in this era (like how come nothing else ever works) but yes it's really not a yumi fic without some political seasoning hehe

LOOK MY THESIS WAS BORING ASF STAY AT HOME SCENE but a girl can dream right dkfjghjkdf

fr hwa can breathe and i'd be a goner so i don't blame the reader for simping like that AND YES AHAHAHA THE LICKING HIS THUMB TO WIPE YOUR WHATEVER UGH I GOT THAT PICTURE IN MY HEAD. I DIED. I WRITE. :D

yes hehehe the last line thing i got that inspo from love next door they did that with their episode names (pls watch love next door)

RIGHT LIKE HOW THE STARS ALIGNED TO MEET THE JEONG YUNHO ON A BLIND DATE I'M SAT I'M READY I DO NOW KISS THE BRIDE

yes omg i basically wrote you (keep dreaming)

omg but real i do that sometimes too with the scale and hand measuring how can i not man his hand is so big ugh i cannot

YES this is basically guerrilla 2.0 bc i literally could not be bothered to come up with anything else i'm so sorry but also it's really really fun to write him as a sunshine serial killer and YES THOSE QUOTES he's literally the sun how could i not :'))

omg thank you for appreciating yeo's moodboard :D it really is fitting right? i can imagine him in a medical setting perfectly, preferable in a darker medical setting like this one

omg thank you for appreciating the characterisation too maybe i'll make this a separate fic one day LOL but yes we stan a man who still cares, even when he's uh killing ppl (FOR THE GREATER GOOD)

i said it before i say it again, there cannot be a yeo fic without chicken mention. if that happens with my fic, that's not me. that's an impostor.

LOL NOT YOU WAITING FOR ANOTHER PLOT TWIST WHEN THIS IS SUPPOSED TO BE A SHORT CUTE LITTLE SCENARIO have i traumatised you

RAHHHHHH YES DADDY SAN ANY DAY AND LMAOO doing what ;) what do you think ;) (he sleeps, ofc)

YES SAN A GREEN FLAG AS A RED FLAG SO BASICALLY A... BROWN FLAG?

the woo cameos are very unintentional but he's so side character coded LOL

YES AHHAHAHA EXECUTIONER WHO THIS IS JUST THE CHOI SAN WE KNOW AND YES YOU LIKE HOW I THINK RIGHT HE REALLY IS A GREEN FLAG

hmm you're craving royal mingi fics? time to write my royal beauty and the beast au break who we don't get breaks in this household loren has wished for a royal au and her wish is my command-

AHAHAHAHA this may be the first time she gets called song's girl but you bet that's all she's gonna be called from now

LMAO YES WOOYO BEING THE SAME PIECE OF SHIT I MAKE HIM EVERY TIME AHAHAHAHA HE'S SUCH A LOVEABLE BRAT

i almost made him a pyromaniac and made reader a firefighter but i guess i can do that some other day 😔✌️

LOL AHAHAHAHA idk what's with me and writing woo e2l smutty fics it just hits every time hehehehe

MONSTER OF CAPITALISM SHOULD HAVE BEEN HIS TITLE FR AND YES ITS CEO X CEO RIVALS AU

bruh when i tell you i thought i wrote turns tables and went to double check AFTER writing the correct phrase clown energy fr

YES OMG idk what it's about jongho but he's so daddy coded and when he says terms like darling or sweetheart you bet it's gonna hit 100x harder

you really are colourblind to red babes idk AHAHAHAHAHA but yes if it's jongho *gets down on my knees* yessir

THANK YOU SO MUCH BABES NGL it was scary to write this without you validating every trope and every plot LMAO and i was worrying if this felt half-assed but it turned out okay :') BUT YES. BREAK. MUCH NEEDED MUCH DESERVED BREAK I'M FREEE

thank you so much for your support babes <33

Ateez as Villains

disclaimer: read at your own risk. do not interact if not comfortable with any tropes. reminder that this is a work of fiction and must be treated so. 

warnings: absolutely no morals here, 18+ mdni, illegal acts (abduction, murder, physical abuse, stalking, trafficking, financial crimes, dirty politics, corruption), suggestive/nsfw scenes, explicit language (swearing, insults), death, violence, blood & injuries, weapons, smoking, drugs, alcohol

a/n: couldn't have done this without @eightmakesonebraincell's and @chronicvagabonds' validation lmao also tribute to tite kubo for coming up with the juiciest dialogues, some of which i quoted here

Hongjoong

The Manipulator

hongjoong always knew he had leadership skills

from being the team leader whenever he played games as a young child, to growing up and eventually influencing people

he was often told that he has a certain way of pulling people’s attention and leave something stirring inside them with his words

so it is no surprise that hongjoong is where he is today. a renowned businessman, philanthropist and… politician

hongjoong adjusts the sleeves of his shirt and glances at you from the mirror

you are standing behind him, holding his coat for him. he wears it with a proud smile and holds his chin high

“tonight is very important. for me. for this country.” 

he goes on about how there will be people from all over the country

people who are the foundation of this nation. people who care about the future of this world 

and if you weren’t so blinded by the adoration you have for this man you would have called him delusional

but the fact is that you are deluded by him. hongjoong has the ability to cast a spell with his words

he feeds his supporters the lie of a better world in the near future, and they bow to him

hongjoong smiles devilishly at the thought of what entails the events of tonight

he can picture it clearly- the cheers and desperate screams of his followers as he steps on the podium

the cries of these people, as helpless as sheeps in a herd, waiting for an upright politician to save this nation 

he can feel the thrill just imagining what it will be like tonight when he addresses the nation as the new face of his political party

to a common person, he would just be another man with a good heart striving for a better change

but the common person is weak, and for them… he is their salvation

they will hear his words tonight- words he has carefully crafted himself. the cues will register in their minds, and they will end up seeking him to announce their undying support and loyalty, to shower in his glory

you straighten hongjoong’s coat and smooth over his shirt, your hands unsteady with anticipation

“aren’t you happy to be right next to me when i conquer the stage tonight?” he whispers, lifting your chin up

you meet his eyes and he can see his answer there

you hope he doesn’t see the conflict in your eyes. the conflict is to be concealed in your heart, in the deepest, untouchable corner of it

you are blessed, they tell you, to be the politician’s favoured

and you are- you truly are. hongjoong loves you. he adores you

in fact… he’s almost obsessed with you

and why wouldn’t he be? you were the one who led him here

you were the one who held his hand and showed him the right path- his partner, and now his secretary

oh, how you sometimes wish you could turn back the hands of the clock and go back to when hongjoong was hopeless and thought that the world was a wretched place beyond saving

that is when you told him that the only way to run this world was to join hands with the elites of this nation- or to become one

it must be the fates that led him to where he is today

after all, isn’t he a king without a crown? a ruler without a throne?

he is a born leader and a strategist. he has always been good with his words

it’s how he earned the favour and graces of the elites and the politicians and made a place for himself- not under them, but beside them

but to stand beside those people, you have to be a little… corrupt. and morally ambiguous

the world is not run by saints, after all

“sweetheart?” he calls when he sees you are distracted

you don’t miss the warning tone in his voice. tonight, you have to be on your toes

you have to seek out willing supporters and show them that they mean the world to hongjoong and his political party

but more importantly… you need to target other politicians, find their weaknesses and if lucky, have some join hands with you

“i’m here,” you tell him and he nods firmly, pressing a kiss to your temple

“i will see you tonight,” he promises, and you know what he means

he always gets such a thrill out of playing the leader

he gets so much energy, and he has to take it out one way or another

and what better way to take it out in the form of lovemaking?

you feel warmth course through your body as he trails his finger down the middle of your chest purposely

he almost smiles maniacally as he leaves first, giving you a moment to gather your wits

you pour yourself a glass of drink- you can’t possibly do this sober

you join hongjoong as he gives his first speech- a very normal talk about how this nation is on the verge of collapse

corruption, crime, inhumanity, dirty politics? you name it

you admire his resilience, really. whatever he is talking about comes straight from his heart, and he has been talking about these issues for a long time now

you also admire his pompousness and the audacity to talk about dirty politics, when he is the face of dirty politics

you join the audience when they clap for him, your heart full of pride

there is a break where he meets with the high-profile people and asks them to consider joining hands with him

‘to make a better world for the future generations’. such inspiring words from such a young political leader

except hongjoong’s trick is that he always, always has something over them

he has a team dedicated specifically for this task- to dig dirt on his political targets so he can wield them like the blade of a guillotine over their heads

despite his evil means to climb the top, somehow, his image and reputation remains far too clean

and that is because he knows to take these actions behind the scenes, away from any eyes

a true politician, he’s been dubbed

it is about midnight when the hall almost empties, leaving only the members of your party and some new faces- people who are willing to hear him out and decide if they want to join his party

you wish you could tell them that it is a trap- hongjoong will promise that their efforts and support will lead them to something great

‘the greater good’, he always says, except these people do not know what they are getting into

they are merely sacrificial lambs, the stepping stones that will lead hongjoong closer to his utopia

they will, for the sake of loyalty, put a blindfold over their eyes. they will hold him in high reverence as he becomes their lord, their saviour

he will feed them copper pellets and claim that this is the best that they can get while he himself sits on a throne made of gold

and when they empty every last drop of whatever they have to offer- their blood, sweat and tears

hongjoong will discard them without remorse. that is who he is- a master manipulator

when you are done wrapping up the event in the deep, dark hours of the night, hongjoong finds you in your bedroom

his chest is heaving with energy that is threatening to combust from within him

he outstretches his hand and you saunter over to him

his hands are dominating when he holds you, though his kiss is soft and unrushed

until that too becomes scalding hot

he is quick to lead you to the couch where you sit on his lap, finding him painfully hard

he groans loudly and starts to unbuckle his pants, and you instantly know what he wants- you always know what he wants

he easily slides his hard length inside your warmth and groans heavily in relief, resting his head back and just letting you both stay still

you only move to rest your head against his shoulder. he can have you like this for as long as he wants

“we have a lot of new supporters tonight,” he begins, chuckling deeply, “the polls seem to be in our favour too.”

his dark curls caress your face as you snuggle against him

“we also managed to score deals with many influential politicians and businessmen tonight,” he tells you and you look at him with pride as he names them

“soon,” he begins, trailing his hands under your dress and squeezing your thighs, “soon… we will have our people in every sector- in business, healthcare, industrial, courts… we will be controlling the nation- we… we are the leaders of this nation.”

his cock twitches inside you as he finishes that sentence and you bite your lips in thought

“what are you thinking, love?” he asks, caressing your face

“i just sometimes wonder,” you begin- can you admit your bare thoughts to him?

he squeezes your thigh as a sign to go ahead

“i wonder how we got here, joong,” you admit, “you know that we are exploiting people-”

“for the greater good-”

“for the greater good, yes,” you finish, nodding and he furrows his brows in concentration

“these people are just like us. we were once slaves of this society, but now we are the leaders. and they are our slaves. but…”

“they will offer us what they have,” hongjoong replies softly, “and we will make the best out of it. isn’t that right?”

you nod. there is no more space for any more questioning

you have never like the darkness in his eyes when you question his- your- methods

all he knows is that he is right

he knows what he is doing is wrong in essence, but it is about the bigger picture- he is doing this for his nation

and you cannot expect to run a nation claiming to be a saint

the nation is run by wolves, and to make space there, you must be some sort of a predator. that is who he has become

his grip on your thighs tighten and he starts to grind your body on him

between the sounds of pleasure is the groan of pain as he spanks your thighs and remind you of your place

“all you have to do is follow me,” he breathes into your ear, trailing his lips across your cheek. “all you have to do is stay with me. together…” he thrusts hard inside you. “together, we will rule the world one day, you and i.”

you nod and he swallows your moans as he kisses you, thrusting with all his might until you both come crashing down

he takes you to the shower and you both quickly clean up and get in bed

as you watch his figure relax and succumb to sleep, you confess to him

“you are a great politician, hongjoong,” you tell him and the corners of his lips curl in a smile. “i’m just afraid of going too far with you. every day, we learn that we can get worse than we are, yet…”

“yet, it has become my addiction and my duty,” he whispers, hand finding your bare arm and caressing it. “don’t you want to rule the world?”

“you will rule the world. i will be treading on your shadow, following you closely and sharpening my teeth… but afraid.”

“afraid of what?”

“of you,” you breathe and he opens one eye

“you won’t leave me, will you?” he asks innocently, yet it is there- the warning in his tone

you are responsible for who he is today. you are an accomplice

every person he ruins to get closer to the top, you are equally responsible for it

“of course not,” you tell him, “i can’t leave you.”

hongjoong notices your choice of words

you can not leave him- you do not have a choice

he holds you close and kisses you like he means it that night

it would be such a shame if he would have to throw you away after all of this, right? 

it would truly be such a shame if you are just like the others in the end- weak and helpless

since you know exactly what is going on inside hongjoong’s head, you tell him you love him like you really mean it and you let him hold you close

it may be a trap, but you don’t mind being trapped if this is where you end up every night- in his arms

your lord, your saviour

The Manipulator and the Manipulated

Seonghwa

Jekyll

park seonghwa is a man who is adored wherever he goes

be it at work- at a prestigious university as a neuroscience professor, dr. park, or at social gatherings, formal or informal

he is a man born with the best manners, the most caring and generous heart

you’ve seen him around the department as a masters student and attended a few of his classes 

but you never got to interact with him personally until it’s time to choose a thesis supervisor and you learn that you have a chance with him

it’s purely because he’s amazing at what he does 

your subfield matches with his specialty so it will be better if he’s your supervisor (and it’s only a bonus that the man is painfully hot so you’ll never be bored)

your professor recommends you to seonghwa and he goes over your synopsis which leaves him intrigued because coincidentally, he’s researching in molecular neuroscience as well

he gladly takes you on because he believes you both will be helping each other along the way

plus, he recognises your name- you’ve always had a different air about you (and he remembers you from somewhere else too)

he’s looking forward to working with you, that’s all

so when you arrive on your first day as his supervisee and research assistant

you catch him in his natural habitat- unaware of his surroundings, humming a tune to himself and swiping his hair hurriedly to the side with the hand that’s holding a clear solution of some sort while struggling not to drop his notes on the table that has a few microscope slides 

basically, moments away from a disaster

he spots you and grunts as if asking for help and you immediately drop your bag to rush towards him, only now noticing that somehow, he’s holding his glasses by his teeth

you first take those out of his mouth and he groans in relief. “can you please help me wear my glasses? those cultures are moments away from expiring.”

“oh goodness,” you mutter and you lock eyes with him as you put on his glasses for him

and your intrusive thoughts take over because you simply cannot take how his hair is poking his eyes so you gently brush his hair out of his eyes

for a moment, time is frozen for all sorts of reasons

before seonghwa takes a deep breath and you blink, immediately getting out of his way and holding his notes for him

the notes apparently hold the readings on how much solution he needs to pour so you read it for him and consequently save him from a disaster

as soon as he is done freezing the cultures, he holds the edge of the table to save himself from slumping in relief

and you share a laugh, the ice breaking just like that

he tells you that the student assigned for taking care of the cultures had an emergency and he had to rush from another department

and he thanks you for helping him

you both move to his office to go over your thesis and he helps you create a timeline

you wrap up the meeting with a clear direction of what’s next and with a schedule of shifts where you will be assisting him

it doesn’t take long to get used to being a part of his team of five calm students with a little streak of crazy

and you suppose dr. park has an eye for people like that because you fit right in

you are all very dedicated so he seems to be at ease when you are working, though he does monitor you more closely since you’re new

you start to spend more time in the lab simply because you like how it feels there

it is like a little cocoon where you can tune out the rest of the world and work on your thesis without distractions (plus, it helps how people from your team pop in once in a while to throw some suggestions at you)

you like how it is there- neat and clean

the sound of metal against metal, glass against glass. the smell of the cleaning agent which calms you since it is something familiar now

and then there’s dr. park himself, gentle and composed, yet at times clumsy and rough which results in the room cackling with laughter

however, there’s a side to him that you only see when you’re alone with him

you’re not sure if he’s like that with everyone- he must be, right?

does he pay as much attention to everyone else as you?

perhaps, you’re delusional. that must be it

seonghwa knows you must think that, because he has not been very obvious but he has not been subtle either

it’s just that he remembers you from that time. he remembers seeing your face in his friend wooyoung’s data

wooyoung, who is an expert at singling out people like them

people like seonghwa who have a little streak of crazy in them, yet manage to be a part of the society almost seamlessly

wooyoung’s company does a good job at managing these people because they ultimately help the black market grow

seonghwa is half convinced wooyoung’s company is just a faction of the government but of course he can’t confirm that

all he knows is that he cannot act out too much and get caught

in return, he knows when someone like him is in his radar

here you are, glasses perched on the tip of your nose as you examine different slides under the microscope, muttering to yourself about the readings as your scribble them

he can’t help but notice how you always wear that one specific shade of deep red on your lips or how your hair falls in the most irresistible way in front of your face

he’s never looked at a student this way- ever- but you’re not just a student now, are you?

so when he makes his move, approaching you from behind as silently as he can

he’s not disappointed when you turn- he didn’t make a sound, yet you knew

you’re not even surprised, and that excites seonghwa to no end

“ah, dr. park,” you go casually, as if him sneaking behind you was normal behaviour. “can you approve of these hypotheses?”

seonghwa hums and stands awfully close to you, your sides brushing against each other

he purposely crowds in your personal space as he leans in to confirm the readings of the specimens on the table

“everything’s perfect,” he announces, meeting your eyes

you’re still sitting so you have to look up at him and lord. what a sight he is even from this angle. you could totally get used to it-

“what are you looking at, sweetheart?” seonghwa smirks knowingly 

you have to physically struggle to maintain your composure because you are pretty sure you were gawking

“nothing, just zoned out,” you say, which isn’t a lie but not the whole truth either

he knows though. he knows the effect he has on you because he hasn’t been subtle

from the casual touches to the unnecessary (but not undeserved) praise

from the prolonged eye contact to the suggestive smirks

there is something electric between the two of you, an undeniable tension

and while you’re not one who sticks to the rules, you can’t help but wonder just why is dr. park playing with you?

“you sure you’re okay?” seonghwa leans in and searches your eyes for any signs of lies

upon finding none but gaining satisfaction from the way your lips part in surprise, he draws back 

you try your best not to make things awkward for the rest of the time you’re with him

and in the following days, his advances only start becoming stronger in nature

you like the attention he gives you. you like how he always puts his hands on your shoulders and gives them a little squeeze whenever he finds you sitting

you like the way his warm breath caresses your cheek when you’re both sitting side by side inspecting a specimen

you enjoy the sound of his gentle voice as he instructs you

it’s almost as if he knows. it’s almost as if he’s asking for it

does he not know that once you become obsessed with something, you’ll try- no, you will possess it at all costs?

so one night when you’re both working at late hours, busy with wrapping up one section of your thesis

you can’t take it when seonghwa scolds you teasingly for being clumsy 

“you’ve got pen on your chin,” he says and before you can take care of it, he himself scoots closer-

too close for it to be professional anymore because at this point, he can probably count the freckles on your face too-

and begins to rub at your the skin near your lips gently

he frowns when it doesn’t come off, and then he has the audacity to lick his thumb and rub your skin again

“dr. park,” you mutter, about to remind him how you are supposed to be a teacher and student

you’re not friends (despite the very friendly relationship you have developed with him)

seonghwa only hums and you can’t help but notice how he stifles a smirk as he moves his thumb to your lower lip and swipes it, all the while maintaining eye contact

you raise a brow in challenge, silently questioning why he’s still holding your chin

he leans in as if to kiss you and you stop breathing

except he tilts his head to whisper in your ear

“would you like to attend the next soul society meeting with me, love?”

to say that you freeze is an understatement

you don’t move when his lips caress your cheeks as he stays in that position

you don’t move when he purposely trails his lips along your cheek as he draws back

“what’s your classification?” you manage to ask, your voice barely a whisper

the way seonghwa smirks is something you’ll never forget

“jekyll,” he says. “nice to meet you, hyde.”

there’s a moment of silence where all you can do is stare at the man in front of you

a moment of pure static

as soon as you take off your mask and your lips curl in a smirk, it happens

you don’t know who took the first step but you’re both kissing each other

it’s rushed, passionate and desperate, the air filling with your grins and giggles and you’re only glad you’re not in the lab right now because the way seonghwa clears the table with a swipe of his hand, making the notes fall on the ground

only to lift you up and seat you there so he can kiss you better? being in the lab would have done some damage alright

between kisses, you learn how seonghwa recognised you

you ask him if he lured you here somehow, but he tells you it’s just luck that you’re here as his student right now. you don’t quite believe him though

but you let it be- if he’s jekyll, that means he’s got the brains to scheme

he tells you that he’s glad to have found his hyde because he would prefer someone else to do his dirty work for him

you agree- it’s been far too long since you’ve had an adventure, and you’ve heard about the notorious jekyll in the soul society too. you just never connected the dots

he takes you to his private lab (not before feasting on you and fucking you on that very table)

for the next few weeks, you familiarise yourself with his actual research

mind altering chemicals and drugs, anything to do with control

very illegal stuff, but the soul society funds him with whatever he needs

he can’t believe he found you- you’re perfect for him

seonghwa believes he has morals and he can be a good person

so you make the perfect partner because you can be the bad person in his stead

you’re his alter ego, the voice in his head that he never lets come out

you’re the person who not only matches his freak but helps bring it into manifestation. you are now his face

while he advances in molecular neuroscience in the world, you advance, on his behalf, in the underworld

there’s no blood on your hands- you both only produce drugs. you’re not responsible for what is done with them

you do sometimes assist in the practical work, which seonghwa avoids, because after all, he has a reputation to maintain as dr. park

no one suspects a thing. you’re just supervisor and supervisee who share a similar obsession with research

nothing to worry about

Jekyll and Hyde

Yunho

The Hunter

when you finally got to a blind date that your friend begged you to go to, you didn’t expect to meet a man who would actually catch your eye

there is something about this man, jeong yunho, that instantly pulls you in as if you really are tied by a thread 

for starters, he is incredibly handsome and has a soft vibe to him that exudes warmth

his voice has a soothing quality and his mannerisms are as gentle as his gaze. his laugh is pure and he makes quite a good company

he just makes you feel comfortable and safe right away, which is kind of surprising

so when yunho tells you about himself, confirming that he is indeed a corporate lawyer at a well-known firm, you are simply in awe

you thought your friend was bluffing when she told you that she is trying to set you up with a ‘beauty with brains’

she was not lying, is all you can think now

you’re a simple school teacher, you tell yunho with a laugh

however, the man’s eyes are practically twinkling as he hears your stories about school 

you’re only telling him because he insisted, and now he can’t stop appreciating your profession, saying that it’s admirable how you are able to connect with children and educate them

the conversation steers to your likes and dislikes, your preferences, and what you’re looking for in a partner

surprisingly, the two of you have a lot in common

you both have a special place in your heart for food. you both love travelling. and there are some things he does not need to say out loud 

like how he’s a caring person- always making sure you’re comfortable and your bowl is full, draping his coat over your shoulders when you leave the restaurant and scour the streets for something sweet

the hand that he offers you is not suggestive and you like that (you also like how tall he is and how his hand engulfs yours almost entirely)

just two people who talk about anything and everything- that’s who you become by the end of the night

as you settle in bed later, you’re still smiling about how his eyes twinkled when he learned that you too have a thing for gaming too

you have good feelings about this person so far but there’s a feeling scratching at your heart that has you restless

it is the way his eyes darkened almost dangerously, only momentarily, when you insisted that you could get home on your own

he was a gentleman, no doubt about it, insisting that you could never be too sure these days especially with the news being so horrible lately, the crime rate spiking up dramatically in the past few months

you just did not like the idea of having a stranger accompany you all the way to your home, even if it was this gentleman- this was only your first meeting

so he made you promise to call him and let him know when you get home 

and here you are. you dated him for a few months before you both decided to move in together into an apartment that suited your needs

he’s perfect in every way- attentive, responsive, caring, funny, and he gives you space when you need it

which matters the most because you value your personal space a lot

he understands the importance of personal space very well and even though you share a room, you both let each other be 

you let him be when he’s gaming, and he lets you be when you’re staring at the ceiling or reading

more often though, he’ll have you sit on his lap as he games

since he’s so much bigger than you, you’ll curl on top of him to read or scroll and he’ll be focused on his game, liking your presence

it doesn’t always lead to something but when it does, it’s always fun

he has you smitten- his kisses still make you feel like it’s your first time sharing a kiss (and he’s damn good at it)

his touch lingers on your skin throughout the day and you cannot wait to be back in his arms again

it is just another night when you decide to walk and take the longer route back home because apparently yunho was going to be late and you did not want to be home alone

it gets quieter as you navigate through the streets and alleys

and when you take a turn and notice a familiar figure, you stop in your tracks

is that… not yunho? the back and the height looks pretty much the same

the man is watching a woman at the end of the street who is using her phone as if waiting for someone

the woman catches the man watching her and grows wary- you can tell even from the distance

you can tell that she is very much pretending to be on call when she starts moving

despite every cell in your body urging you to ignore this and go back home, you start to follow the man when he starts to follow the woman

you are careful to maintain a distance, cursing yourself internally for being a curious little shit who seeks thrill like there’s no tomorrow

but the woman takes a left, and the man takes a right, leaving you standing in the middle of the street, taking a few deep breaths

nothing happened, you think. you turn and start to trace your path back

and just a minute later, there’s an unmistakable sound of a woman’s scream filling the air

every hair on your body rises as your heart drops and eyes widen

you’re frozen in one spot with no idea what to do next- should you go check on the woman? see if it was the same person? 

not once do you think of calling the police though

you walk back home, lost in your thoughts with the image of the man’s familiar figure branded in your mind especially since you are pretty damn sure that those were little sunflowers embroidered on the hem of the hoodie

sunflowers that you embroidered on yunho’s hoodie

when you open the door to your apartment, though, you hear the sound of the TV and yunho is sitting very casually on the couch

“ah, you’re home,” he grins and waves, just like he usually does

he’s not wearing the hoodie anymore

“i thought you were gonna be late?” you ask

“you’re late,” he counters. “why did it take you so long to get home?”

“just decided to take a walk,” you smile, ruffling his hair and planting a kiss on the top of his head before going to your room 

you grab your clothes and move towards the bathroom to take a shower, and it is then that yunho’s eyes widen

“ah, babe?” he calls, his voice uncharacteristically high

when you don’t answer, he rushes towards the bathroom and finds you standing in the doorway

your eyes are fixed on the sink which is a pale shade of pink with handprints on it

yunho curses himself internally- he rushed to hide his hoodie as soon as he got home, jumped in the shower, spotted the bloody sink from when he first washed his hands and decided to make it look like he had been home for a while before cleaning the sink

only he fucking forgot

it doesn’t look as bad- it’s not a bloody red, for starters

“ah, i forgot to clean that up,” yunho awkwardly laughs, proceeding to move inside and open the tap, taking a sponge and cleaning the edges of the sink

yeah. it does not look that bad

“i accidentally spilled that red ink you have in the room- i don’t know why i got curious and messed with it.”

that’s not the colour of your ink, though, and you know it never leaves stains like these

“don’t worry about it,” you tell him, but your eyes are wider than usual. yunho notices that

he lets you shower in peace, all the while thinking if you suspect something

truth be told, he saw you when you were following him back there which is why he took another turn to mislead you

he also knows you are far too observant for your own good

he can’t lie- one of the reasons he fell for you is because of that. you are just like him

though you are free of sin unlike him, your mind is a mess

you notice too much that is not meant to be noticed. you sometimes say things that even he has not thought about. you question if human morals are an actual thing or a made up construct

is it from reading too much fiction? he thinks not

when you come out of the shower, something possesses you to move to the balcony

and that’s another thing yunho likes about you (which also scares him a little at times)

it is your intuition- which leads you to inspect the little corner where you pile up useless stuff. you can see the sleeve of his hoodie there

you pick it up and find it wet in certain spots

on its black base, you can’t tell what it is, but the sunflowers are stained a suspicious red colour, and it’s definitely not your ink 

you look towards your right where yunho is standing, vigilant

there is a moment of silence before you lower the hoodie 

“it really was you,” you say, unwavering

your heart is not speeding because you’re scared- it is speeding because you are right

yunho is still, contemplating how to deal with this

did he think he could hide his secret from you forever? no. was he prepared in case he gets caught? no

he just never imagined it would unfold like this

and now… will he have to hurt you if you threaten to expose him? he can’t bear to hurt a hair on your head

you bring out all the good in him. he does not know how you do that, but you make him believe that he can love with all of his heart too, just like any other person

you make him feel whole, and it would be such a shame if things fall apart now

to his surprise, you drop the hoodie back and walk towards him until there’s little distance between the two of you

you hold both of his hands in yours and look at him earnestly

“are you going to tell me what you have been up to?”

yunho is surprised at how calm your voice is and how accepting your eyes are

he sighs deeply before steering you to the couch in the living room

and then he bares his heart to you

he is a monster. that is it. he hurts people and it satisfies this ugly part of him

he does not always want to, he justifies, but sometimes, he just can’t help it

and the only reason he gets away with it is because he is not stupid and carefully chooses his victims- people who are miserable. people who have no one around them

“well then… i’m lucky to have one person in my life, right?”

yunho’s eyes widens at your response

you fulfil the criteria of being his victim- you have no one 

you have no one but him- how did that happen?

he thinks back to your first date and he can’t help but feel overwhelmed

he buries his face in the crook of your neck, his head about to explode 

why are you not running away from him? why are you caressing his head and holding him close?

you don’t tell him everything right away. you only ask him to trust you

so he trusts you and waits for you

he learns little bits about you- you, who do not care who yunho is, as long as he is transparent with you

you, who has a twisted sense of morality. you, who might be as bad as yunho, even worse

though, your hands are clean, you tell him sarcastically, it’s just your head that is a mess

and it’s a blessing that you two are together and can be honest about this too, right? how lucky you are to have each other

“you, without sin, are like the sun,” he tells you one night as he kisses the top of your head and holds you close

“you, even with sin, are like the sun,” you respond.

The Hunter and His Guide

Yeosang

The Mad Scientist

there is something about the innocent features of his face, the gentleness in his mannerism, the absolute ethereal aura about him

that contrasts strikingly with the pitch black (or maybe, just two shades lighter) of his soul

the man only knows how to scheme and how to take the best possible route towards his goals

the goals are all related to science

sure, he is contributing to the scientific area, doing researches no one else would do

doctor kang yeosang- a scientist and philosopher, held in high reverence in the medical field, contributing with numerous researches centering the human body

nobody needs to know exactly how he gets such extensive, solid results to support his theories

he comes off as a soft-spoken man, someone who possesses a kind heart

he is willing to overwork himself in order to make life easier for others

he is much appreciated by his peers

they don’t need to know that behind his neat and professional setup is a dark, cold space that holds his real workspace

the endless corridors lined with shelves upon shelves of jars 

jars containing the human body parts within them

from the brain to the spleen, from the heart to the liver

each jar meticulously lined in an organisation such that only yeosang could close his eyes and know where to pick what he needs

each organ in the jar has a story of the human that it once was- the story that yeosang himself scribes and tucks in the safe (and in a corner of his heart)

taking it out only to read and reminiscence, or to make another addition

such as the one that he is about to make now, sauntering with an almost skipping manner, highlighting his delight in the events about to unfold

his pristine white lab coat flows behind him, a symbol of everything that he would not be doing tonight, which only adds to the irony of it all

he finds you mirroring his expressions, eyes wide with anticipation and lips curled in a stifled smile

and he can’t help but smile wider, the sound of his footsteps echoing loudly as he speeds towards you so that he can finally hold you after the long day he had, tired of playing it cool in front of everyone

you are snaking your arms around his neck immediately as he bends down to capture your lips in a fierce kiss, earning a surprised but pleased yelp from you

you let him have his moment, kissing him back with equal passion until he draws away and rests his forehead against your shoulder

“long day, huh?” you press your lips against his temple. “how did the presentation go?”

the presentation being at a conference of the national medical association where yeosang was the chief guest, awarded for his valuable insights to the medical world

“i sometimes wonder if i’m the only one wearing a mask,” yeosang confesses.

you know what he means

there surely must be others just like him

you can’t expect to make medical advancements while sticking to the stupid laws and regulations they have carved for you

the medical associations do not allow anyone freedom 

“it’s tiring to pretend my research was simply a result of my team’s hard work,” yeosang continue, “they didn’t do batshit. i wish i could credit you instead.”

“but you can’t,” you caress his dark locks. “that would certainly raise suspicion since i’m… underqualified.”

well, that’s arguable 

you may not be as good as yeosang at what you do but considering that you come from a non-medical background, yeosang would say that you are pretty close

in fact, overqualified

“i don’t think there’s anyone more qualified than you,” yeosang lifts his head to look up at you, eyes scanning your face. “you’re an expert of the human body.”

you are an expert, that is true

you did what you had to do to survive as a young girl who lost her way

you were meant to be a test subject yourself but you created your own path and proved that you were good with your hands- almost artistic

and that you could open up humans as long as you had a good knife

your skills were a bit rusty when yeosang found you in the black market

but he was thoroughly impressed and made an offer. it was an offer that you couldn’t resist 

you would no longer be bound to be a slave for the rest of your life

you would be his equal. an accomplice 

“but you are the mad scientist. i’m just your unofficial assistant,” you pat his cheek in answer

it’s a wonder that you’re here now, in his arms

a muffled sound interrupts your little moment

you both steer towards the big room and yeosang looks around for a moment to take in the glory of his workplace

the crisp white walls and clean tiles smelling of antiseptic, marred with red stains of blood that is dripping from the man’s limbs

the man who is currently tied to a stretcher in the middle of the room

the instruments and tools that he would be using tonight to open his test subject up are glinting with silver, ready to be used

he has chosen the perfect target- a relatively healthy, middle-aged homeless man

really, no one would care if he went missing

in fact, you were doing him a favour by putting an end to his miserable life, right?

surely, he did not wish to live without a home and the means to survive

though here he was, sedated but struggling nonetheless, as if finally having found the will to live

“ah, he created a mess,” yeosang begins, clicking his tongue in disappointment as he inspects the bruises around the man’s wrists. “i’m sorry you had to wait so long, hmm?”

it’s almost eerie, how yeosang’s voice drips with pity

but that’s what you like about him

he thinks of the greater good. he is doing all of this for the greater good

there is no personal desire to kill random human beings, no

he simply needs test subjects to study the human body, so there can be advancements in the medical world

he just can’t believe that the world does not have a cure or even a prevention for most of the diseases in this age

he has taken it upon himself to contribute to the medical world so people do not have to suffer anymore

he complains about this a lot 

if people had guts, they would have done this ages ago

sometimes, he refers to the awful medical experiments done by humankind- especially on women

he is different from them, he claims

he cares about their pain- that is why he makes sure to make his subjects’ death quick and painless before he starts to conduct his experiments

it’s just too bad that he doesn’t have much time after the person passes to study certain functions of a living human

(so sometimes, he makes exceptions and asks god for forgiveness. easy peasy)

you watch yeosang with a sort of wonder and a little something that resembles fear as he caresses the man’s head in farewell

he asks the man to say his last words, to choose them carefully, to take his time and to make peace with the fact that there is no way out

the sedatives seem to have made the man somewhat placid

the test subject stops resisting to lock eyes with the doctor 

he says something about the regrets he’s had in his life and how he just wants his misery and pain to end now

yeosang’s brows are furrowed in concentration as he listens to each and every word, nodding along as if he aims to fulfil every desire this man possesses 

his hand is gently caressing the man’s head

when the man is done, yeosang tells him that his contribution to medical research won’t be forgotten

he looks at you to find you already staring at him with an unreadable expression

he signals you to get the job done and you inject the medicine meant to stop the man’s heart

you watch the man take his last breath, his face contorting in pain as his heart ceases to function

yeosang has already moved on from the little moment he had, putting on medical gloves and snapping them against his skin rather dramatically

“let’s get to work, shall we?”

you smile in response, following his instructions

soon, you are testing the functioning of the man’s abdominal organs with various equipment and drugs that yeosang has bought from the black market 

you have to work quickly before necrosis begins and hinders you

yeosang is very careful with his methods. his hands are steady as if he has done this a thousand times already 

and though he comes off as clumsy in the public eye, he is anything but here

his eyes are focused, darting between the electrodes placed on the man’s liver to the readings on the screen

it goes on like this for a while, yet another failed experiment as the liver fails to respond as desired to the electric shock and necrosis takes over

it doesn’t disappoint any of you though

yeosang has a strong vision and no amount of failed experiments is going to stop him 

plus, there’s always something you learn even from failure

you begin to clean up when you notice a broken nail lying on the stretcher

you pick it up with tweezers and inspect it- it must have broken when the man was struggling to break free

yeosang catches you looking at the discoloured nail with curiosity and he hums in question

“hair and fingernails are beautiful ornaments.” you ask, “so why do they seem so baleful when they are removed? 

yeosang stands beside you, pondering

“the answer is simple. they are previews of what is to come. of death.”

you look at him to find his eyes twinkling with the knowing glint of someone who’s seen it all

after you both finish recording the data of tonight’s session, yeosang is back to being the cute and clumsy person that you absolutely adore

the man is craving chicken after today’s hard work so you fulfil his wish and take him to his favourite place

you both sit across each other, drinking beer and savouring the juicy meat while talking about casual stuff- just an assistant and her boss

just two friends who met by chance and felt an instant pull towards each other

just two lovers, fated to be together and find solace in each other’s company

as if the stars have aligned for you yet again, a familiar face walks in and sits on the table next to you

you meet yeosang’s eyes and you both stifle a smile

it’s one of the potential test subjects you’ve had in your file, due for observation

and what better observation than to sit next to them in a casual setting and eavesdrop naturally?

yeosang raises his beer glass in toast and you share a knowing smile, raising your own glass in toast 

just two partners in crime. that’s who you are

The Mad Scientist and his Accomplice

San

Executioner

choi san works hard during the day

he goes to the school and makes sure his students are in top shape

as their p.e. teacher and coach, he has every student’s physical status on his fingertips

he knows their strengths and their weaknesses. he also knows their desires

so if a student is not a good runner but wants to run better, he would never tell them to give up, he would personally coach them and make sure they know that their body is not the limit

they can be a good runner, a good player, a good swimmer- anything

as long as they are steadfast, they can conquer the world

so choi san is loved and respected by the students, known to be a very caring teacher

but choi san works harder at night. no one needs to know that

certainly not his colleagues who always go about how hardworking a teacher he is

when he is free from the school, he goes to his home and changes before driving to his friend’s place- a warehouse where a few of you hang out

someone programmes, another composes, another works out

just an innocent hideout that you’re all using even in your early thirties

except that you also huddle around to read the new request you receive on your app

“i am a twenty-one year old female. two years ago, the man who dated my older sister killed her, but due to lack of evidence, he did not receive the jail time he deserves. he claims that he is innocent, but ever since he got out, he’s been bothering me because he had to serve his short sentence anyway. he is threatening to kill my family and then me if i go to the cops. i am scared to leave the house because he is stalking me and i can always see him wherever i go. please help me. i won’t go to the cops anyway- they didn’t do anything then, and they will not do anything now.”

san is contemplating if he should accept this request

you look at wooyoung who is immediately weighing the pros and the cons

you look back at san who is still deep in thought and you gently rest your hand on his thigh, bringing him out of his head

“i’ll take it,” he mutters. “accept the request, y/n.”

you nod and go back to the computer to accept the request

you have a phone call conversation with the client where you set up a meeting

it’s you and wooyoung who go to meet with the respective parties. san works in the shadows

the next night, san finds you deep in thought outside, leaning against the worn out wall of the warehouse

he joins you, hands in the pockets of his baggy jeans

“i know what you’re thinking,” san begins, glancing at you. “you’ve been awfully quiet since the meeting.”

you shrug in defeat. “i know i can’t change your mind.”

“it’s not going to be the same,” san refers back to the one time you all took a request from a 19 year old girl who was being bullied by her seniors

it got to a dangerous point and had you been a little late, you might have lost the girl

san lost his temper that time, though

and while he couldn’t physically harm the kids who were bullying the girl, he had them locked in a room for one night while he educated them

and funnily enough, san was scarier that night

scarier than every other time he actually wields a weapon

you asked him that night if there were any just people left in this world full of evil

“all people are evil. to believe that you are just, you must believe that someone else is more evil than you”

was his response. safe to say, the girl was living her best life now, but you saw a new side of san that night

a side you had never seen all your life, and that was saying something since you were childhood friends

“we won’t let it get to that point,” san assured, outstretching your hand and you pouted before taking it

he caressed your knuckles, his voice assertive. “i will take care of it. properly. i always do.”

“do you think i only worry about things going wrong?” you finally say out loud, the words that you want to say to him every time he goes out in the field 

san, despite himself, breaks into a smile that would seem so out of character to anyone who has not known him for long

“you can’t smile your way out of this,” you sulk further, snatching your hand away and folding your arms

“baby,” san begins, trying to take your hand again but you’re not having any of it

“i’m worried you’ll get hurt. i’m worried about the pain you’re willing to go through so you can lessen the pain of others.”

san stops teasing then, mimicking your position as he leans against the wall next to you

there is a thick silence surrounding you and you wonder what wooyoung is doing inside- is he napping?

“it’s something i have to do. something only i can do. you know that, right?”

“i know,” you say, almost a whisper. “and that’s what makes this more frustrating.”

because it was originally your idea

on a summer night when you were all about to graduate, a tragedy happened in your town

a man went on a spree, killing and wounding multiple women and children for weeks

you, who knew one of the victims personally, were shocked by the act and disgusted at how lazy the police were being

it turned out that the assailant was a high-profile businessman and the police were trying to cover the case up as per the orders of their superiors

the three of you were hanging out in the warehouse, each burdened by their own train of thoughts, until you finally said it out loud

“what if we were some sort of a private service where we help the victims? especially when the police can’t?”

it was wooyoung who agreed first, and san who disagreed

it took him some convincing to finally agree, and you set rules

you were not going to kill anyone- only maim

if it’s a serial killer, you maim their hands so they can never hold a weapon again

if it’s a bully, you maim their mouth so they think before they speak

the three of you are a team, but san is the executioner

wooyoung is his eyes and feet, and you are the brains

so it is ironic how worried you are about san now, when you gave him this role

“i know that i can get hurt,” san begins, taking a deep breath. “but there is no pain as long as i keep my eyes on the balance scale.”

this time, when he outstretches his hand, you take it. he plants a sweet kiss on your knuckles

“don’t worry about me, hmm?” he tugs you closer so you can rest your head against his firm chest as he embraces you. “i can’t focus when you’re so worried.”

“i can’t help it,” you tell him. “you’ll just have to get used to it.”

san lifts your face with his thumb below your chin, his brows furrowed with concentration and worry as he looks at you

his eyes are sharp as he scans you so you smile

immediately, his body relaxes and the corners of his lips curl in a smile as he pecks your lips- once, twice

and it is about to turn into a deeper kiss when wooyoung claps loudly to get your attention

“alright, lovebirds. get inside. we have a heads-up.”

you scowl at wooyoung who smirks in response but you both immediately join the youngest inside

your client has texted to let you know that she’s about to go out so you can stalk her stalker

you and wooyoung take your equipment to the van and san prepares himself 

he’ll be observing tonight, but he is prepared in case the stalker catches on

just like that, you observe the stalker for a few days, assuring your client that she is safe

you plan a trap to lure the stalker to an abandoned area where san will have a little chat with the stalker 

and when the day comes, all your client has to do is threaten to call the cops on him

he comes after her and that is when san knocks him out with a punch

the stalker finds himself tied to a chair in an empty room when he opens his eyes

there is the stale smell of something resembling death in the room, and that makes the man resist 

from the darkness, san emerges, clad in all black, his face covered with a mask

and his favourite weapon, the dagger, in his hand

you and wooyoung are watching from the camera embedded on his coat

you can see the glint of the dagger as he twists it dramatically in his hand

san circles around the man once as if to gauge the room 

even through the camera, you can tell how thick the air must be feeling

san meets eyes with the man and removes the tape over his mouth, wincing when the man screams his lungs out in hopes that help would come

there is no help, not for miles

“who are you?” the stalker spits on the ground near san’s feet 

san only shuts his eyes in mild annoyance. he is not easily riled up

“you have been found guilty of the crime of stalking. tell me… what should be your sentence?”

the man pales, fresh beads of sweat trickling down his forehead 

“it will be better if you admit to your wrongdoings and give me a fair number. you don’t want to leave it in my hands.”

“what do you mean sentence?” the stalker starts struggling fiercely, almost falling off the chair. “i have already served!”

san grins under the mask, closing in like a cat and stomping on his foot, making the man let out a guttural groan of pain

he leans in to whisper in his ear

“but… that was for murder. and unfortunately, i am not charging you for murder tonight. otherwise… you would not have walked out alive.”

the man gulps loudly, meeting eyes with who has to be the person he has heard so much about in prison

most of the people in prison feared this man- the judge, they called him

the man was the judge, jury and executioner for criminals, feared more than the cops or actual prosecutors

“surely… you’re not him, are you?”

you wince at the fear in the stalker’s voice and meet wooyoung’s eyes

san never confirms if he is that. he simply finishes the job right there

the stalker’s screams are heard for quite a distance, even outside your earpieces

you shut your eyes momentarily and when you open, you can see the blood oozing out of the man’s left leg

san is wiping the dagger with the man’s own jacket as he tells him that he will never be able to stalk people again

the man screams and screams, waiting for something more, but nothing else comes

san’s job is done

he tosses a broken piece of glass near the chair for the man to free himself if he wishes to

when san comes back to the van, the air is sombre, just like after every finished request

wooyoung pats his shoulder in acknowledgement and mutters a joke in an attempt to lighten the mood, which works

“they still call you the judge, huh?” wooyoung teases as he drives

“judge, jury, executioner. how scary, choi san.”

san raises a brow at your comment- he can tell what you’re referring to

you’re referring to the first time when he came back covered in blood

and the first time he realised that no matter what he did, you would never be scared of him

and that you and wooyoung would always have his back and guide him

“i think i’m only the executioner. you both are the judge and jury.”

“makes sense,” wooyoung agrees. “but the world does not need to know that.”

Judge, Jury and Executioner

Mingi

The Overseer

“the future, pitch black, upside down”

mingi dips his brush into the onyx ink, finishing writing the words on the big canvas

the canvas that is a splash of colours- red for the blood on his hands. white for the innocence he lost too soon. blue for all those nights he spent trapped with only the moon as his friend

and finally, black for the future. the future is the only uncertainty in his life

despite being a leader of a notorious gang, he can never be certain about his future. there are always people after his life

he cannot trust anyone- not one soul-

“sir,” a voice interrupts and he knows who it is instantly

even if he did not hear your voice, he knows you are the only person who would dare interrupt him in the middle of his private time-

“tea, sir. you’ve been cooped up in here for too long,” you say, placing the mug on the table

-for something as meagre as tea

mingi spares a glance in your direction, noticing how you are still dressed in your usual all-black fit

which means you have not gone to sleep yet, even though it’s well past midnight

“and what are you doing up so late?” he asks as he picks up the cup and sips it, finding it exactly to his liking. a flavour only you can nail

“watching you paint,” you confess without hesitation

because in this place, in this room, between the two of you, there may be truths hidden, but there are no secrets

mingi is amused to hear that though he does his best to hide it

“and what do you think of the painting?” he asks, allowing you to take a closer look

you smile at his permission to inspect his art and you inch closer to the painting, now standing beside your boss

you read the words on it in a whisper and cock your head in thought

“isn’t this too dark, even for you?” you question 

mingi shakes his head in amusement and looks down. only you could have made this observation, having been at his side for a solid seven years now

where others would say that his paintings were too ‘colourful’ considering the kind of person he is, you still find them too dark and void of life

you’d know better, because you know mingi inside out

he first found you when he was a street thug in the process of becoming something big

all he had was his raw strength, a strategic brain, a few rusty weapons and some loyal friends

he went on to fight gang after gang, always emerging victorious and merging the losing team with a good deal- it’s how he earned respect around and gained a reputation

every other gang knew not to stand against him unless they wanted to risk losing everything they had

when he first opened his office in the darkest part of the town, he found you purely by chance

you were nearing the end of your teens- a rebellious little girl who cut ties from her family and ran away from home

at that time, you had multiple part-time jobs trying to make ends meet, hoping to find a place to live

and one fateful night, you found yourself in front of a building to deliver chicken, peering up at the light coming from the 4th floor- this must be it 

although… you weren’t sure if the loud sounds coming from the floor were just men having a good time or if something had gone really, really wrong

men will be men, you thought, wanting to get the delivery done with so you could move on

only when you reached the 4th floor, you spotted men lying on the ground and clutching their limbs, blood all around

while every sane part of your brain screamed at you to pretend you saw nothing and go back, you recalled how when you received the order, they promised a big tip to the rider

you could not miss that, could you? you had to find a place to live, and you needed every penny

so you started with the men who seemed to be unconscious. you took any cash they had, being careful to hide your face in the hoodie

you moved to the office, hearing a crashing sound and flinching

you made quick work of grabbing more cash from the thugs- they had to be thugs

they all had guns, for fuck’s sake

you went into one of the neater rooms and placed the bags of fried chicken there

and you froze when a burly man made his way inside, wiping blood from the edge of his mouth

“ah… you must be song’s girl, eh?” he snickered, scanning you up and down

“i- i’m delivering chicken,” you pointed at the table. “i’ll be on my way then-”

“not so quick,” his gaze darkened 

instinctively, you grabbed the nearest object, which so happened to be a mug and chucked it at the man, successfully hitting his head

he clutched his head in pain and you made a dash outside, bumping into another man

the tall man seemed mostly unscathed save for a bruise on his cheek

he held your wrists to steady you and his eyes darted in the man’s direction who was clutching his head no more

“oi, song!” the burly man called. “teach your girl some manners, will you?”

the man called song pushed you to the side and a gunfight ensued

you took shelter behind a shelf, observing how the taller man successfully shot his every target

when he thought he was done- and was out of bullets, he looked in your direction and tsked loudly

you were about to come out of the shadows when you noticed one of the supposedly unconscious men take aim of song’s head

your eyes widened and almost instinctively, you grabbed a heavy metal object from the shelf and rushed to the man who was targeting your saviour

to say that mingi was surprised to see a young girl save him from his enemy by nearly crushing the man’s skull?

he knew you were something special right away

you both stared at each other for a long time before he told you to go back to his office, lock the door and not come out until he comes back

he was done sooner than you thought, and while his men cleaned his mess, he found you in his room, sitting rather calmly

“so you’re the delivery girl,” he narrowed his eyes

“i hope the chicken is still warm,” you responded. “if you can just pay me so i can leave-”

“why did you do that earlier?” he asked, voice low and rough that sent shivers up your spine

“i don’t know,” you answered truthfully

mingi paid you more than extra that night and told you to come next time they place an order 

the next time would turn out to be the last time you would ever work a part-time job

mingi offered you a place in his gang, and you took it

you are still not sure what your position in this gang is though- they smuggle drugs but keep you away from the work, so what are you doing here?

personal assistant? chef? manager? all of these? 

sometimes, you are accompanying wooyoung in the field- the gang now has an official base and a few legal businesses

sometimes, you stay in the kitchen with seonghwa and wooyoung to cook

other times, you sit with yunho and hongjoong to plan and offer your opinion on their strategic takes

you aren’t sure if you are qualified for that- you probably aren’t

somehow, though, the gang members respect you for whoever you are

you are the light in their dark life, they joke. you are someone’s friend now, sibling to some, secretkeeper for others

but you still aren’t sure what you are to mingi

whenever you ask him why he took you in, mingi always responds with something different

“you were clever grabbing all that money from our enemies”

“you saved me- though i must say i could have handled it”

“you looked like a lost cat”

“you didn’t report us”- excuses, all of them

truth be told, mingi has no idea what you are to him either

he has a certain fondness for you that he has for no one else. of course, it didn’t happen instantly

he took you in because he realised you had a strategic mind and he could really use that

he insisted the office needed a ‘feminine touch’ even though it came in the form of a cranky teen who wouldn’t stop asking questions

but somehow, the two of you formed an unbreakable bond

he finds solace just being with you in one room, even in complete silence

he loves to hear you talk, even though you mostly question his morals

because he is not a good person, you found out

song mingi is not conventionally good. he is a man of principles, but he does not have the best morals

despite all that, you learned a lot from him. the world is a harsh place, and only he can protect you 

he learned a lot from you too. the world is a harsh place, and only you are his safe space

when at times things get stressful, he comes to seek you. he finds you in the shared residence and sits with you

if he is feeling down, you will have him lay his head in your lap. you will caress his head and let him be

if he wants to talk, he will. otherwise, he will watch you for a long time until he falls asleep, unguarded

when he gets tired, he will seek your arms. all he has to do is show up and you will know what to do

you will drop whatever you are doing and spread your arms

it is his home at this point. that’s how things are like

are you in a relationship? you don’t know

all you know is that song mingi is the most important person in your life

it doesn’t matter if he lives life the way he does

it doesn’t affect you anymore- the blood on his hands or the chaos in his mind

it doesn’t bother you because you know his heart, and that is all that matters

so standing in his private space right next to him, inspecting his painting with a critical eye, you tell him that the painting is not him

he tells you to pick a colour and you reach out for a box, making him chuckle

“really?” he asks

“the future may seem black, but…” you begin. “it doesn’t feel so dark when i’m with you.”

mingi takes a deep breath at your words. you always get him like this, and he is not sure if he can restrain himself anymore

your heart aches when you see him curl his fists, a sign that he is holding back some words or an action

“tell me what you’re thinking,” you request, though it registers like a command in the gang leader’s brain

“i’m thinking that i never should have given you this life.”

you shake your head at that- how many times has he voiced out that he wished you had lived a better, normal life, away from the clutches of the underworld?

“no, you’re thinking something else too,” you comment

“i’m thinking that i want you to stay here, with me, forever,” he responds

you nod in approval. “i’m right here. i’m not going anywhere.”

“you could get hurt,” mingi says, taking a step closer and closing the gap between your bodies

“i am a big girl now, mingi,” you laugh, wrapping your arms around his waist and hearing his erratic heartbeat

his arms are still by his sides for a moment before he embraces you

“i’m old now, in fact. how much longer will you keep me waiting?”

mingi grows stiff at your question. so you know

of course you do

mingi cups your face and locks eyes with you

“i won’t break,” you promise

“i know,” he smiles, pecking your forehead. “i’m afraid you will break me.”

your lips curl in a smile and he rests his forehead against yours

“are you sure about your choice?”

“yes,” you breathe. “i want you. i’m yours.”

mingi draws back

“i meant your choice of colour,” he tilts his head in the direction of the painting and the box of paint you picked for him

“of course you did,” you laugh at his attempt to distract you

mingi leans in to close the distance between your lips

it is soft and unrushed. you both have waited for the right moment, the right time for years and everything feels absolutely right at this moment 

you go first, asking him to join you in your bedroom and he agrees

he assesses the canvas once again

as a finishing touch, he sprays a final splash of yellow- the colour you picked for him

yellow for hope, for all the light in his dark world

The Overseer and his Shelter

Wooyoung

The Maniac

it has always been a cat and mouse game with you and wooyoung

you chase after each other, running in circles with no start or end

it’s almost as if you both have sworn to keep your eyes glued on each other, watching every move, anticipating what is next

someone’s lips curls up in a failed attempt to restrain a smile- a smile that drips with mischief and mockery

someone else’s eyes glint with threat and promise that this is not over, their fists curled in anger

you chase after each other like cat and mouse

only…you’re not sure who is the cat and who is the mouse

sometimes, it is you chasing after wooyoung

jung wooyoung, the son of one of the richest businessmen in town

a privileged piece of shit who is not right in the mind

a crazy bastard who has made it his life’s mission to not only drive you to the edge of the cliff but to push you and laugh in victory as you fall

he takes advantage of you being a criminal investigator 

some people jest that they can’t tell if wooyoung means to ruin your career or lead you to your promotion

with the amount of times wooyoung has gotten himself in trouble (and gotten away with it) he keeps your desk full of cases that you spend most nights investigating

while he keeps your hands full, what frustrates you to no end is that he almost always gets away with his crimes only because of his social standing and his connections

he gets away with petty crimes. he gets away with bloody fights that could very well have him spend one night in the station, cuffed 

he gets away with major crimes such as money laundering and tax evasion

no matter how much you try to investigate, you cannot

there are the warnings of your superiors who threaten to fire you because this is not your worry

and even if you do start to investigate, wooyoung’s team is quick to wipe any evidence of said crimes

you’re pretty sure that at this point, he might be hiding a body somewhere in his house

you wouldn’t be surprised. man once set his enemy’s mansion on fire

to make things worse, he got away with it- even when he was the only one grinning and playing with a lighter on his way out 

while the others scrambled like mice, he sauntered in style

he gets away with anything

you reputation at the station is already in shambles because of it

they call you his shadow at this point, considering how you are always following him

the truth is, you just want to wipe the shitty grin off his face for once

you want him to suffer defeat when you finally put him behind bars

you want him to chase after you like you chase after him

you might come off as delusional, but you’re half convinced that whatever wooyoung does is on purpose at this point- to get your attention

it wasn’t always like this, you and wooyoung

it started with a simple fight that broke out at a party where all the high-profile people were

someone was stupid enough to call the police- but you were more stupid because you went ahead and handcuffed wooyoung

you told him that you couldn’t waste this opportunity because you were investigating another case related to his father’s company anyway

and he? he laughed out loud like a maniac

you soon learned why, going home with the sound of your superiors scolding you still ringing in your ears

here you are, a few years and a lot of chasing each other later

except… you get something out of the chasing now

all he has to do is corner you. all he has to do is rile you up as he tells you why you lost this game yet again

with his burning gaze and honey voice, he pins you to the spot

with his fingers tracing the curves of your face, he tells you how much he loves you chasing after him 

as if he’s all that you ever think about. he might be right

“don’t you think we’re meant for each other?” wooyoung questions almost innocently, licking his lips subconsciously as he trails his finger down the curve of your neck until he reaches the first button of your shirt

“don’t think too highly of yourself, wooyoung,” you respond, your chest rising and falling in controlled breaths

you can not let him know the effect he has on you

however, wooyoung doesn’t need any sort of confirmation

you can try to keep your gaze steel all you want. you can attempt to sound sure and fake indifference, but the fact is that wooyoung knows

all he has to do is take another step forward and fill the gap between you two

his warm breath caresses your face and you gulp despite yourself

he watches you intently and squeezes your neck just a bit, causing you to part your lips for air and then he brushes the tip of his nose against yours

his other hand is slowly but surely unbuckling the belt of your pants and taking it off

you can only thank god in an ashamed relief that you’re in a private space- the space being one of the empty rooms in a random building on a random street because you had been tailing wooyoung

(at least the door is locked)

wooyoung brushes his lips against yours as your pants fall on the ground and pool on your feet

the sound that makes has heat rushing to your face- this should not be happening

you are a fucking detective and wooyoung is your target

but you can’t complain when his fingertips dance along your hip bones

all he has to do is swipe his fingers up your panties

upon finding them soaked (as usual), he smirks and you smack his chest

he catches your fist in his hand, though

“all for me?” he asks

in a matter of seconds, your lips are upon each other, tongues in each other’s mouth as you wrap your legs around him

he picks you up effortlessly and places you on a very dusty table

he gets rid of his clothes all the while kissing you expertly, aiming to please you, dominate you

he sucks on your lips, your neck, anywhere he can get his mouth on

and when he finally takes off all your garments, he has more places he can get his mouth on

“admit it, detective,” he breathes against your clit. “you’re obsessed with me.”

“get to work before i cuff you and fuck your brains out, wooyoung.”

wooyoung’s laugh echoes in the room as he recalls that night- a night he is sure he can never forget

“does that mean i get to experience that again if i stop now?”

you are moments away from your high- how dare he ask if he can stop?

he gets the hint and gets to work, and he makes sure he does a good job, licking and sucking at your clit until you’re screaming

for bonus points, he dives his cock inside right after and stays still as he starts to kiss you eagerly

this time, you’re the one who loses to him and lets him take control

you let him thrust into you. you let him praise you and humiliate you to no end

truth be told, you’re addicted to him. there is no going back from here

wooyoung knows how to use his tongue and he whispers sweet nothings

he is also surprisingly good at aftercare, even though you don’t accept it from him

well, you try not to, but he is insistent

he takes you home and he invites himself in

you go to the shower and he goes to your room to admire the effort you put into bringing him down

loads of files and a board full of his ‘accomplishments’ staring back at him- nothing he doesn’t know

“you think your daddy will help you if i start to investigate the slush fund you have?”

“which one?” is his response, and he grins widely as you gape at him

he can practically see the gears in your head turning and he adores that

it is a cat and mouse game after all. he must give you something so you keep coming after him

(and you must give him something so he keeps finding you too)

while you’re still processing what he just implied, your phone rings

you flinch when you pick it up, getting an earful from your team leader once again, because where were you?

you were supposed to tail wooyoung to confirm that he is meeting up with a notorious gang member who does his dirty work

the case you’re team is on these days is targeting the gang, and yet again… wooyoung is involved

so what the hell were you doing, your superior asks

“jung wooyoung did not meet up with the gang leader,” you say into the phone, your eyes fixed on wooyoung 

wooyoung has a shit-eating grin plastered on his face

“and how do you know that? i thought you lost the tail-”

“yes, i did lose the tail,” you bite your lips in thought- you can’t tell your team leader that wooyoung has a strong alibi this time-

but wooyoung goes ahead and snatches your phone from you

“detective lee,” wooyoung greets and you mutter a string of curses under your breath

you watch wooyoung charm his way through the matter

telling the detective that he was in a tight spot because of the gang they are investigating

and how it is a shame that a ‘civilised’ person such as himself is being linked to thugs

he tells him that he almost got attacked but you saved him, and you hid him in an abandoned building, being wise enough not to blow your cover 

you can’t tell how he does it, but by the end of the call, your team leader is fully convinced that you did a good job today and he even praises you when you take the phone back

when you end the call, you glare at wooyoung

“what?” he shrugs. “i needed an alibi.”

“is that why you took me to the building to fuck me? because you needed an alibi?”

wooyoung watches you with mild curiosity

“did you think it meant something else?” he asks

it would have hurt if he really meant it, but that’s the thing

you both know he doesn’t mean what he says, especially about whatever is going on between you two

he has risked his position and even his life far too many times just to get you alone and fuck you

so you only smile and shake your head in response before telling him to fuck off and get out of your sight

(and he does. not before a second round)

when he leaves, you watch his car disappear from the window before going to the board and updating everything you got out of him tonight

everything about his business and his crimes. everything to make your case on him stronger

it’s truly a wonder how much you can get out of fucking someone right and you’re positive you can see the end of this case now

though… you’re not sure if you will ever take this to court. but that’s something you’ll worry about later

for now, you will follow him like a cat follows a mouse

and he will chase after you like a cat chases after a mouse

The Maniac and his Shadow

Jongho

The Tyrant

it is always a little too cold in the building for your liking

the building that is choi enterprises, located at the heart of the city, standing tall with numerous floors, laden in luxury

it is a workplace and home to some of the people in this city and a symbol of something untouchable to the others

as you enter the building, accompanied by your secretaries and a guard, you instantly feel the temperature drop despite the warm tones of the interior

the employees that greet you may have smiles on their faces but it’s all an act. you can tell, because you know what a genuine smile looks like

choi enterprises somehow always manages to keep the most calculating people to themselves. it might be why the company has flourished so much in such a short period of time

“to the private elevators, miss,” a man says and you recognise him as one of the ceo’s personal staff

you follow him and tug your jacket closer, wishing you had worn it instead of draping it over your shoulders

you catch your reflection on the golden glossy door of the elevator and straighten, lifting your chin up

you will not be pushed into submission, you repeat for the umpteenth time

however, things are not in your favour this time

in this never ending game of business rivalry, you and choi jongho have never seen eye to eye. you always stand in opposition, defensive or offensive

sometimes, you manage to outsmart him while making a new business deal or scoring a new project. other times, he is a few steps ahead and wins the game

except when you lose, somehow, the loss is much greater and a bit personal

your company always suffers more when you lose, which is why this little meeting you are going to have with jongho is no less than a negotiation- a war, if you must

sometimes, you wonder if jongho has a personal grudge against you. these meaningless battles start to seem like an excuse to see you

if not, then why is jongho looking like he just won the lottery at the sight of you?

“as beautiful as ever,” he says, scanning your figure slowly

you don’t move an inch, pretending those words don’t affect you

the secretaries move to another room, leaving you and jongho alone

jongho gets up from his chair and moves to the middle of the room, motioning you to take a seat

you watch as he pours a drink for you, his muscles flexing through the coat he’s wearing 

you take the drink- you need something to calm your nerves

“i suppose the odds are not in your favour, considering you found your way back here”

an allusion to the time he said that you were meant to find your way back here again and again, that you were just a lost kitten and he was your master, controlling you

at that time, you thought he meant to spite you, but time after time, he proved himself right

you always find your way here, always as the opposition. this time, though… you won’t bend

“if the odds are in your favour,” you begin experimentally, downing the drink in one gulp and then pouring one for jongho. “would you like me to join hands with you?”

now this is new- jongho’s eyes slightly widen at your remark

“ah… how the tables have turned,” jongho started to chuckle lowly

you let him be for a moment, scoffing internally

jongho had earned the right title over the years since he stepped up as ceo of his father’s company

a monster of capitalism

known to be the owner of many questionable businesses, borderline illegal, evading taxes and having slush funds unashamedly, heavily involved in money laundering- the list goes on and on

a true financial villain- a true monster, yet… being able to get away with everything, unscathed. that’s who jongho is

he has bribed every soul who would dare go against him. and those who do not take the bribe? he makes sure they kneel

and you… you’re pretty close to being his next target- he did say you would look pretty on your knees for him

“is business not going well?” he asks, faking innocence. he knows

you are a rival company- seo enterprises. everything that jongho’s company is, but… more legal

your forefathers were once partners, and they created their independent companies without a hint of rivalry

they were the definition of true brothers (and partners in crime)

the difference between the values of your company came when you and jongho stepped up as ceo

you had made it your life’s mission for your company to earn a good reputation and moral image, while jongho seemed to have made it his life’s mission to simply conquer the world, no matter what or who the stepping stone is

“business is well,” you narrow your eyes at him. “it’s about the land in ilsan.”

jongho doesn’t seem surprised to hear that. it is always like this- he knows what moves you will make

“ah, the one where we are about to construct a gallery?” jongho asks

“we?” you repeat. “that land is a shared property. why have you not consulted us before going ahead and signing the documents? how could you begin this project without us-”

“the other option is selling it to the government because of the redevelopment project,” jongho leans forward, “and you know how much i despise the government getting their grubby hands on what’s mine”

you know he is right, and he knows that you are not here to argue about why he started this project without telling you

jongho relaxes back, considering all his options before deciding to strike. “you’re worried about your involvement in that project, is that right?”

“well,” you mirror his position, “i would like to keep my reputation clean unlike yours.”

he chuckles at that, proud of his deeds. “yeah, well, that’s going to be hard, sweetheart. that gallery is going to be an optimum location for storing money.”

you know what he means. the gallery is going to display priceless pieces of arts. those pieces are but a means of illegal transactions for the elites

you swallow your anger, taking a deep breath. “i’d like to have my shares back, then. before construction starts.”

“uh…” jongho gets up, fixing his clothes. “you’re going to have to convince me for that.”

“please,” you scoff, but he only shakes his head, ignoring that because he knows this ‘please’ was wholly sarcastic

“try harder,” he smiles mockingly before turning his back to you and moving to the window, putting his hands in the pockets of his pants and staring down at the city

a tyrant- that’s who he is

he expects to get the maximum output out of anything he set his eyes on, no matter the cost- money or lives

you join him by the window, pointing at a few spots. “that’s where people held protests against your company last week,” you tell him. “apparently, you have been exploiting labourers too.”

“that’s what they think,” he spits. “i gave them more than they deserve. they just never learn to accept. they never get pleased.”

you look at jongho- he sounds like he is saying the truth. he has the art of sounding like a victim at times, thus justifying his actions

“doesn’t all that venom in your heart make you dizzy?”

jongho glances at you, his lips threatening to curl into a smile at your words

“doesn’t it get tiring, pretending to be moral?” jongho asks, trying to read your guarded eyes 

“there’s no pretending. i never claimed that i was full of morals, mr. choi,” you sigh. “i just wish for my business to have a legal foundation.”

“and it will, you don’t have to worry,” he responds, curling a section of your hair that had been resting on your shoulder in his fingers

you don’t flinch at his touch. you’ve known him since the beginning, and nothing he does fazes you anymore- except when he leans closer experimentally, locking eyes with you and trying to read you

“you will get your shares, but you will have to convince me,” he says, voice barely above a whisper

it is a challenge. it is always a challenge with choi jongho

“why are you so obsessed with me?” you laugh this time, swatting his hand away

he joins, and everything almost seems normal for a moment- just two friends with too many inside jokes, except… it only lasts for a moment

“how can i convince you?” you ask, sombre

“you know what i want from you, y/n,” he replies in a similar tone

he wants a true partnership, except his idea of a partnership is where you bend to his will (and so is yours)

“don’t turn this into a legal battle, jongho,” you warn, “i would hate to summon you to court.”

“don’t turn this into a petty rivalry,” he counters, “you will benefit from this project. you reputation won’t be harmed.”

“i don’t want my name next to yours,” you tell him in all honesty and you think you see hurt flash in his eyes

“that is not possible,” jongho declares. “our companies are not mentioned without each other. we are fated like that, you and i.”

that is true. no one dares to touch the two of you, so you two have always been alone

there is no one you both can trust. there is no one next to you 

except the two of you are always together, wherever you go, be it business parties, political dinners, or high-profile events

you can only trust each other, because despite knowing everything about each other’s business, despite being at war with each other

you are always honest with each other- honest about your intentions and purpose

there is no one next to you because you two are always together, leaving no space for someone else

do you hate that? not really. does he hate that? he’s not sure

“you can buy my shares from me,” you start, “or you can shift them elsewhere. i can handle whatever loss comes with that.”

“or… you can let it be and use the revenue for something ‘moral’,” he taunts and silence envelopes the room

“no matter how much you try to maintain a clean image,” he starts, gentler this time, “you cannot undo the damage your forefathers have done to your company, y/n. seo enterprises will always be known as the company that exploited the weak to get to the top.”

you don’t wince at that, though your heart aches to hear that

“just like your company. except you are continuing in their footsteps,” you say

jongho nods, watching how your shoulders are curling inwards

“you are not weak, y/n, stand straight,” he almost scolds, taking you by surprise 

you find yourself straightening at his words, confused to see how conflicted he looks

“you are the strongest person i know,” he tells you, and he means it. “i just don’t get why you are atoning for their sins.”

“i don’t know either,” you smile in defeat. “i just am.”

“well, if you ever get tired,” he gently places his hands over your shoulders, “i am here for you. you can lean on me.”

you lock eyes with him, scanning his face. his smile seems genuine

the way he kisses your forehead makes your heart melt

when he embraces you, you lean on him physically

and you almost give in, except…

“i can lean on you, huh?” you say, soaking in the warmth of his body, taking as much as you can before you continue 

“so you can end my career, merge our companies and crown yourself king?”

you look up at him, finding him smirking

just like you thought

“not a chance, choi jongho.”

“how can you see right through me every time, y/n?” he laughs loudly as you smack his chest and move towards the sofa to grab your purse

“i’m the only person who knows who you are,” you tell him. “you can own the world, but you will never own me.”

his eyes glint almost dangerously

“challenge accepted,” he says

you mockingly wave goodbye before exiting the room

choi jongho never changes, and neither do you

but somehow… it gets more addicting and electrifying to be with him, to compete with him and to stand with him

even though he is a tyrant, and you are everything that he is not

The Tyrant and His Defiant Ally

[baekhvuns]

I would have to go to USA and see Ateez to meet her, cause that woman went to so many stops 😬 then had the audacity to complain they only played one show in Texas 🔫

There's nothing worse than a lacklustre final match, but this one was a mix of boring (girst half) and nerve-wracking (the rest of it). Mbappe living up to his Ninja Turtle persona, I mean they really needed to have a talk cause ☠ I don't pay much attention to PSG, but I'm surprised they're not doing better, I remember they didn't make it to quarter finals last season, but then Barcelona didn't even left the group stage so 🤔

I was never a huge fan of Messi (I know he's good he just annoyed me like most Barca players ajhdiajsjsnsjdhsjsj not as much as Pique or Busquets 🔪) but then Neymar happened and he took the annoying crown. But yeah I know they're both talented, I just don't like watching them 😅 even though they're out of Barca

YOU'RE A BARCELONA FAN?????? I think we talked about Real before, I thought you were on my side... this is very sad, but what can you do. Not everyone's perfect 💔 Real won last season so I'm happy with them, though I miss the old players. Especially since Benzema won't be playing for much longer... he was so good last season. I even saw RM in match a few months ago again. And Arsenal is doing well, so I can't complain about my teams. Tbh I feel like Seonghwa is a seasonal fan, most Koreans also love Tottenham only because of Sonny, sorry I can't take them seriously 🔪 Jongho though, my beloved, I think he likes PSG too.

Like I said, there was a time I wanted Mbappe in RM, I do think he'd be useful, BUT he needs to check his behaviour! Hopefully he grows up soon 😐

That's what I've been saying, idols football competition plsssss! I remember San scoring an own goal lmaooo

Girl, I need to tell you about the webtoon Act Like You Love Me, cause it was cute and fun at first, but it's turning into True Beauty A LOVE TRIANGLE with one guy being the worst?! The girls has become so weak and unsure and annoying, and the ML is being a doormat. My guy you're hot ass TV star, please STAND UP my man 😭 and ofc the guys are friends... sigh so many dumb misunderstandings, everyone's so tired of it. Anyway, rant over.

For My Derelict Favourite I think on webtoon it's on chapter 22 or something, I'm also reading in Korean because I can't wait for more chapters. But I found a website with Eng translations that has over 30 chapters already

The blue bird in the teaser 👀 we get cool teasers, so I can't complain too much about that. Seonghwa glitching?! I think Halateez need to be revived or perhaps Strictland thinks they're gone, but they actually aren't. Seonghwa's role is interesting though, he was always kinda "sus"

I hope people don't actually want ETL, unless it's like playful or something... Y/Ns are going through so much, they're stronger (and often dumber) than me

I don't expect Kai x Seulgi to actually fight about an emoji, but it'd be funny 😭

BBC is still releasing promo pictures they just cropped the date?!?!

SM I'm so tired of you, seriously 😭 also Got the Beat or whatever they're called are coming back? Hopefully they get a decent song this time

Keeho keeps showing his kpop stan Twitter persona jayshsgauisjahahs

WRECK IT RALPH BACK AT IT

Yesterday when I typed Seonghwa into Twitter "Seonghwa Taemin" came up and today it's "Seonghwa Jesus"

Oh but thissssss - DV 💖

maghi hello!!

I would have to go to USA and see Ateez to meet her, cause that woman went to so many stops 😬 then had the audacity to complain they only played one show in Texas 🔫

i wish u saw my face when i read texas 😭😭😭😭😭😭 OH AND SHES AMERICAN, DOUBLE HOMICIDE PLS

There's nothing worse than a lacklustre final match, but this one was a mix of boring (girst half) and nerve-wracking (the rest of it). Mbappe living up to his Ninja Turtle persona, I mean they really needed to have a talk cause ☠ I don't pay much attention to PSG, but I'm surprised they're not doing better, I remember they didn't make it to quarter finals last season, but then Barcelona didn't even left the group stage so 🤔

ur right!! tHE SECOND HALF HAD ME SWEATING EDGE OF MY SEAT PRAYING TO GOD MY KNUCKLES WERE WHITE I WAS PRAYING LEADING UP TO THE DAY I WAS INTO THIS FBWNDB I WAS HEATED watching it early morning and my mother enters and france scores twice the way i SCREAMED,,, bad luck i tell u,,, psg got great players but the club just cares about money and the way the club is monitored around mbappe but they had a good last season, hopefully this ones much better and the coach actually cares 😭😭 also manifesting the final to be here instead of la but there isnt enough seats 😭😭

also anon it’s ur chance to come to vancouver 🔫🔫

I was never a huge fan of Messi (I know he's good he just annoyed me like most Barca players ajhdiajsjsnsjdhsjsj not as much as Pique or Busquets 🔪) but then Neymar happened and he took the annoying crown. But yeah I know they're both talented, I just don't like watching them 😅 even though they're out of Barca

LMFAOOOO JCHWKDJ STOP BC PIQUE ANNOYS THE SHIT OUT OF ME i dunno how he tolerated him for so long what a snake,, that rumor w gavi's mom had my JAW dropped,, are u, are a u ronaldo fan mayhaps... i was watching barca vs madrid highlights for adrenaline and its just pepe and ramos red card at every 80min, that era >>>>

YOU'RE A BARCELONA FAN?????? I think we talked about Real before, I thought you were on my side… this is very sad, but what can you do. Not everyone's perfect 💔 Real won last season so I'm happy with them, though I miss the old players. Especially since Benzema won't be playing for much longer… he was so good last season. I even saw RM in match a few months ago again. And Arsenal is doing well, so I can't complain about my teams. Tbh I feel like Seonghwa is a seasonal fan, most Koreans also love Tottenham only because of Sonny, sorry I can't take them seriously 🔪 Jongho though, my beloved, I think he likes PSG too.

YEAH DHQKDHQKDBKCBCKC we did! and it’s fine bc no one can be perfect like a barca fan <3 but at the end of the day half of them are teammates at psg 😭😭 no bc begging for a classic old madrid and barca match even if its for charity purposes i just need the SAME ppl on ONE field for ONCE ,,, benzema’s retiring was messy as hell tbh, don’t like him as much but man’s a BEAST would’ve loved to see him at the wc would’ve been interesting 😭😭 no ur right, they’re all def tottenham fans but son’s good but not that good fbwnfbd sk got one (lung park excluded) good player, JONGHO, WE CAN SAY, IS A INTELLECTUAL MAN OF INTELLECTUAL INTELLIGENCE

Like I said, there was a time I wanted Mbappe in RM, I do think he'd be useful, BUT he needs to check his behaviour! Hopefully he grows up soon 😐

tbh, mbappe IS monster! (i do think haaland may b even bellingham can give him a run for his money tho) but he’s still got a way to go in terms of being an overall good player, from what ive seen as a psg fan, he doesn’t create chances, misses WORLD CLASS passes and then stops working halfway if ball’s not passed to him + has like no teamwork,,, i do think RM would humble him if he goes there, but yeah hopefully he does grow up!!

That's what I've been saying, idols football competition plsssss! I remember San scoring an own goal lmaooo

LMFAOOOO SAN WOULD MAKE HIS OWN TEAM LOSE, miss goals too...he’s like harry maguire  😭😭  ,, i do think wooyoung would score all the penalties, hongjoong is the dramatic diver i just know,, who do u think ramos, zlatan (rowoon) and others would be

Girl, I need to tell you about the webtoon Act Like You Love Me, cause it was cute and fun at first, but it's turning into True Beauty A LOVE TRIANGLE with one guy being the worst?! The girls has become so weak and unsure and annoying, and the ML is being a doormat. My guy you're hot ass TV star, please STAND UP my man 😭 and ofc the guys are friends… sigh so many dumb misunderstandings, everyone's so tired of it. Anyway, rant over. /// For My Derelict Favourite I think on webtoon it's on chapter 22 or something, I'm also reading in Korean because I can't wait for more chapters. But I found a website with Eng translations that has over 30 chapters already

act like u love me…the guy is suspiciously a look alike of seonghwa….ha?¿ NO WHY IS IT A TRUE BEAUTY ARC???? DOES IT GET BY BETTER BY ANY CHANCE 😭😭😭 ok u bet bc i read the first 5 chapters of it and iM into this thing

The blue bird in the teaser 👀 we get cool teasers, so I can't complain too much about that. Seonghwa glitching?! I think Halateez need to be revived or perhaps Strictland thinks they're gone, but they actually aren't. Seonghwa's role is interesting though, he was always kinda "sus"

this entire cb is like “DID U GUYS SEE THAT AT 0.095 SECONDS???” or “DID YUNHO’S CHARACTER D WORDED??” its so chaotic but hopefully the song lives up to the hype <33 ur right, seonghwa’s character is sus but yeosang??? WHO IS HE!

I hope people don't actually want ETL, unless it's like playful or something… Y/Ns are going through so much, they're stronger (and often dumber) than me

YEAAAH but also bc the playful line can cross lines dbdbd exactly, y/n’s are untouchable, unstoppable girl bosses,,, want to be the yn in bodyguard hwa

I don't expect Kai x Seulgi to actually fight about an emoji, but it'd be funny 😭 ///// BBC is still releasing promo pictures they just cropped the date?!?!

FBWMDBWK I WANT THEM TO STIR THE POT 😭😭 emoji fight would be iconic but then theres a whole group of idols who use that as their emojis, need them to fight as well, BBC’S  JUST EMBARRASSING ATP

SM I'm so tired of you, seriously 😭 also Got the Beat or whatever they're called are coming back? Hopefully they get a decent song this time  ///// Keeho keeps showing his kpop stan Twitter persona jayshsgauisjahahs

NO SERIOUSLY 15 MORE NCT MEMBERS???? SUPERM ROTATION?? COME ON LEAVE THAT ONE MEMBER BC THIS GROUP IS ALREADY AMAZING HE CONTRIBUTED ONE LINE 😭😭😭😭 yeah! they are! apparently a new sub unit of got is also coming?? 😭😭 im just happy exo is being released from their basement 😭😭 LMFAOOO KEEHO AND YUNJIN NEED TO MEET BDBDB

WRECK IT RALPH BACK AT IT //// Yesterday when I typed Seonghwa into Twitter "Seonghwa Taemin" came up and today it's "Seonghwa Jesus"

wreck it ralph wrecking alot of things and one of them is my sanity <3 FBAMDBAKDJAK TWT KNOWS WHATS UP i looked up hwa the other day and it would continuously say seonghwa gay and if i click on it his dating scandal is the first thing fbfb

Oh but thissssss - DV 💖

STOP?????????//(*(*&^%%W#$

also anon bap getting plagiarized ?? 😭😭 only way for a comeback 🤲🏼

since u brought up taemin jesus, it’s time to revisit this video

???

tell me this is not meryl streep in the devil wears prada

anon…..him and mingi…mINGI

[formula-what]

Brocedes time line for a very patient anon

Lewis quotes in orange, Nico quotes in pink, everyone else is blue.

okay first some background knowledge:

Nico is rich as fuck. only child, born in Germany, brought up in Monaco. son of world champion Keke Rosberg

Lewis was born on a council estate in Stevenage and his dad had to work multiple jobs for him to start karting

Honestly I think the difference in their backgrounds is one of the things that pushed them together, they were both isolated from the rest of the kids, but I’m keeping this purely facts rather than speculation.

2000

They’re both 15 years old and are karting teammates for MBB (Mercedes Benz McLaren) in Formula A

Robert Kubica: “there was always competition. But they didn’t fight. It was friendly competition. There was always laughing afterwards.” // “they would even have races to eat pizza”

They often shared hotel rooms at the races which was a “scene of many wrestling matches between them”

Dino Chiesa (their karting boss) – “many times I was called by reception about some problem in the room. It might be noise, or they might have broken something. They would never sleep so they were always tired the next morning”

“they both liked ice cream so much, particularly vanilla. During the night they wanted to eat ice cream always, so I had to go out everywhere to find some and keep them happy”

Lewis would often persuade Nico to buy him sweets

They would have competitions over LITERALLY EVERYTHING

Lewis: “we always had great competition whether on the racetrack or computer games or playing football”

“probably the first bit of competition we had was when Nico used to ride a unicycle everywhere so I thought, ‘I’ve got to learn how to ride this unicycle. Ive got to be better than him.’ I spent all my time outside the go-kart learning to ride this unicycle”

Apparently it only took Lewis 2 hours to teach himself how to do it

In maybe 2013 ish (when they were still friends) Lewis reflected with– “I have never laughed so much than when we were racing together. Nico was kicking everyone’s butt at that time. We had so great races together and built a great relationship”

“we were just arriving and enjoying go-karts and eating pizzas every weekend, fighting all the time and just having fun, whereas now it’s all business.”

many times they would talk about what they would do when they got to f1, made plans hoping to be teammates and become world champions together.

“Nico would say ‘when I’m in formula one’ and for me it was always ‘if I ever get to formula one’. Because obviously Nico’s dad was a formula 1 driver- he knew he was going to make it.”

F1

Nico joined f1 in 2006 with williams, Lewis 2007 with McLaren. And man I WISH I knew what went down with this two when Lewis nearly one his rookie season (missing out by one point to mr fernando alonso) and then WON THE CHAMPIONSHIP in his SECOND SEASON (again by one point thank you mr alonso)

2008 Australia

Nicos gets his first podium, and ofc Lewis is there (he won it) and they are jumping around in the cool down room. Just, two kids who are literally living the one thing they have spent their whole lives dreaming about together. Lewis won the championship that year and oh wow I can only imagine their celebrations together.

2013

They’re teammates in Mercedes!!!

Nico: “every other day there are moments or things that pop up and I can smirk and thing, ‘that’s exactly the same as it was 15 years ago’”

2013 Malaysian Grand Prix gets an honourable mention. This is the race with red bulls good old multi 21 but merc also had their own team orders, stopping nico from fighting for his first merc podium, but Lewis disagreed with it so it didn’t really spark that much tension between them- more the team.

2014

the start of the turbo-hybrid era so y’all know this was good in terms of performance.

2014 Bahrain Grand Prix

They were both fighting for the win and had a collision which prompted a “mock fight” in parc ferme after the race (which I really hope there’s a video of).

Turns out, Nico won because he had used engine modes banned by Mercedes to get a power advantage in the closing laps. which kinda pissed Lewis off

2014 Spanish Grand Prix

Lewis’ fourth win in a row and took lead in the championship. They were fighting till literally the last second and Lewis crossed the line 0.6 seconds ahead of Nico, who says he could have passed him with one more lap.

Lewis defended using the same banned engine modes that Nico had used in Bahrain. Yeah.

2014 Monaco Grand Prix

This is IT. This is peak petty bitch. This is the one people still cry about.

It’s the end of Q3, both of them are out on a lap, Nico ahead of lewis. Nico’s already on provisional pole but Lewis is pretty close.

And then,, Nico just,, parks his car?? He says he made a mistake but the guy doesn’t even crash he straight up just,, rolls to a stop into a slip road. So the yellow flags come out forcing Lewis to abort a lap that was in the makings of pole.

The stewards say it was a-okay but Lewis was convinced it was intentional (and let’s be honest, yeah it probably was) and he even claimed that merc’s data proved it. (low key surprised he didn’t just tweet out the telemetry but I guess he got a stern telling off from mclaren last time)

But *this* is when Lewis tells the world that they aren’t friends anymore. An iconic interview.

Nico then wins the race too, ending Lewis’s four win streak and putting Nico in the lead of the championship.

2014 Hungarian Grand Prix

Lewis has an engine failure in quali meaning he starts from the pit lane, but he does good to make his way up the pack but THEN there’s a safety car which puts him ahead of Nico but on a different strategy.

Nico asks if Lewis can let him past as he needs to pit again before the end of the race, which will give him the place back anyways. Lewis straight up refuses, he’s on a role here. He started from last, and Nico started from pole, why should he slow down to let his title rival through.

Mercedes strongly suggest that his blocking fucked up Nicos race but Niki Lauda is on Lewis’ side so he doesn’t get punished (We stan a supportive father figure) even though he did blatantly refuse to be a team player.

And guys, this is the last race before the summer break so you know Nico was left seething for four weeks.

2014 Belgian Grand Prix

Second lap, Nico attempts a clumsy move and there’s contact, giving Hamilton a puncture and knocking him out of the race.

There’s a lot of controversy but basically it turns out he crashed with him intentionally, not backing out of the corner to “prove a point”. Nico ended up finishing second but was punished by the team, forced to apologise, and even booed on the podium.

2014 Abu Dhabi

For some reason it ran for double points?? The first time in History??? But idk???

Lewis had a perfect start and went on to win it and take the title, Nico had a problem and was told to retire the car but he kept going anyway and finished 14th. Nico went into the cool down room to congratulate Lewis on the championship win, which. cute.

Lewis claimed his second championship. Which not only was huge because of the inter team rivalry, but also because of the large gap between his first win. This guy had lost out on winning the championship in his ROOKIE season by ONE POINT, and then WON it in his SECOND season, and then there was like a FIVE YEAR gap before he won it again.

2015

Damnnn this car was fiiiinneeeeeee.

They do more laps in testing than any other car AND do it on a single power unit. And then. Australia. They take a one-two THIRTY FOUR seconds ahead of the third place Ferrari.

2015 Chinese Grand Prix

Nico is second in a one-two but claims that Lewis kept backing him up into Seb, trying to compromise his race (and help out his boyfriend).

Lewis gave zero shits: "It's not my job to look after Nico's race, it's my job to manage the car and bring the car home as healthy and as fast as possible. That's what I did."

2015 U.S. Grand Prix

If Lewis wins here he could also claim the title with three races to spare (you have to remember back then the title fight often went up to the last race so this was pretty cool)

Lewis very aggressively forced Rosberg wide at Turn 1 to claim the lead, and then there was some sexy fighting between the Mercs and Redbull all race. Nico led in the closing stages but made a mistake, running deep into a corner and letting Lewis past with only a handful of laps to go.

Nico finished P2 and had not only lost the race but the championship title. Nico was fuming, saying Lewis’ move at the start was “one step too far”.

This is the infamous cap throw in the cool down room. Lewis throws Nico his P2 hat, Nico straight up yeets it back at him. I tear up just thinking about it. They grow up so fast.

2016

Nico had came so close to winning and I guess this was just, the last straw. All or nothing. This year he literally gave it everything he had. Lewis and him stopped speaking, Nico gave up literally the rest of his life and even stopped sleeping in the same bed as his wife and taking care of his kids, instead spending every moment trying to get into Lewis’ head. Honestly, I think he might be the only one that could beat Lewis. Just because he knew him *so well*. He literally threw away like 16 years of friendship. But also it’s like, he had to be world champion. He *had to*. His dad was champion and his whole life he’s been preparing to win it too. Tough luck that he raced in the same era as Mr. Best Driver The Sport Has Ever Seen.

Nico won the last few races of 2015, and the first four races of 2016. Lewis had a couple car problems and Nico had a good lead on him in the championship.

2016 Spanish Grand Prix

Gentlemen. A short view back to the past. Nico had made a switch error on the formation lap causing the car to go into the wrong engine mode. So he was running a lot slower than Lewis, who was fighting to claim back the lead.

Nico closed the door to keep him back, and Lewis lost control on the grass, and spins into Nico and taking them both out of the race in the first lap. This is probably one of the most iconic crashes. I’m pretty sure there’s a clip of this somewhere in black and white with the titanic music over the top.

Niki Lauda blamed this one on Lewis (I guess even a supportive dad has to be critical sometimes) "Lewis is too aggressive. It is stupid, we could've won this race".

2016 Austrian Grand Prix

Nico had been struggling with a brake issue all race but was still on the way to win it. But in the last lap Lewis had caught him up and gone in for the overtake.

Typical Nico not taking any shit, refusing to be the guy that backs out and they collide. Lewis took the win and a damaged Nico dropped to fourth. From first. In the last lap.

Both of them blamed each other and tired dad team boss Toto Wolff threatened team orders in future races.

The stewards blamed Nico for the incident, issuing him two penalty points for failing to allow "racing room" and causing a collision.

2016 Abu Dhabi

In the final laps of the race, Lewis ignored team-orders from his race engineer and the technical director.

He deliberately slowed and backed Nico into the pack hoping they overtake him, and there would be enough of a points difference to win the title.

Nico finished second and won the title by five points.

And then,,, Nico announced a surprise retirement during the FIA prize giving ceremony.

Lewis’ response:

"This is the first time he's won in 18 years, hence why it was not a surprise that he decided to stop.” (We stan a petty king)

“But he's also got a family to focus on and probably wants to have more children. Formula One takes up so much of your time."

“In terms of missing the rivalry, of course because we started karting when we were 13 and we would always talk about being champions. When I joined this team, Nico was there, which was something we spoke about when we were kids. So it's going to be very, very strange, and, for sure, it will be sad to not have him in the team next year."

And now they are kind of on speaking terms but not really, they are both pretty private but I think they are at the ‘awkward small talk when we run into each other at the supermarket’ stage of the break up.

[inflammatoryfandomblog]

okay so soren and claudia’s relationship is basically the best character writing the show has, in that it stays consistently good even when the show pulls out the biggest stinkers i have ever seen. i’ve written about this waaay back so won’t go into it again. one detail i really, really wished they had managed to put into the show proper and not only the novelizations is the fact that viren healed a sickly soren when he was very young with dark magic, which in addition to putting a physical toll on him, made his ex-wife spooked out and probably contributed to their divorce.

this actually shines a lot of light on soren’s dynamic with viren. claudia tells ezran that soren immediately clung to viren when told to choose between his parents, and if viren is the one responsible for curing soren, then yeah, that makes a lot of sense. it also makes a lot of sense in terms of viren thinking that he’s owed soren’s loyalty or even his life--viren’s entire Thing is that he frequently faces bad consequences for doing what may otherwise be traditionally heroic acts, and ofc, as in the show (and especially during the events of the show as viren realizes that “all he did was for nothing”), viren *would* resent him for it. it’s completely in-character.

so soren has the double-whammy of not being able to live up to expectations as much as claudia, and also feels like he owes his dad so much, since his dad was willing to do bad things for him. he has a really good reason to think viren loves him even though he’s the clear unfavorite.

and he’s much more loyal to viren as a result in a way that claudia wasn’t initially. he does actually try to kill the princes, even if he’s uncomfortable with it. i mean, surely his dad would do the same for him, right? now i know we like saying that claudia’s just inSaNe because of her s3 stuff, but pre season-3, soren was the more unscrupulous of the two. killing the princes is something claudia at that point in the story would not have done, and something that she refuses to believe viren would even order. the straw in the camel’s back for soren was being betrayed by viren in that little gaslighting scene, not necessarily just the fact that he ordered to have the princes killed. in that moment he learned that the sacrifices viren made didn’t mean he loves him.

this information also begs the question of how he may have felt about being cured by dark magic at the end of s2. if the context of viren healing him in a similar fashion were present while watching the show and the characters were allowed to have feelings about that, his getting-paralyzed-for-five-seconds thing would be more substantial than a “oooh look a claudia moment. look at that dear. isn’t it so cute. feel bad for the deer. focus on the deer. also guys soren’s dumb lol. look at how dumb he is. he barely has a functioning cerebrum lol. and also guys look he’s crushed by his dad’s expectations sadface. but look at claudia she’s all corrupted now!!! see it’s all good winkyface, this is a Big Moment for Claudia!!!” claudia is doing a very similar thing that viren did in his childhood. of course soren may have some mixed feelings about it--and maybe even slightly alluding to this might have, i dunno, meant something to the person who was actually paralyzed. if this scene were written with more of that in mind, this would actually completely transform the writing here while keeping the general event (a cured soren) intact.

this would also make “you’re heading down that path too” in season 3 also be more resonant than just soren being spooked out by dark magic and make his reasons for refusing the lux aurea dark orb that much stronger. it would imply that he’s aware that there’s some sort of “debt” to pay and maybe that he was somehow “responsible” for viren’s divorce (soren is as dumb as bricks but it’s implied many times that he’s more socially/emotionally intelligent than he looks) thanks to dark magic. he may not want to feel that he “owes” viren anything, and may perhaps see a pattern of self-sacrifice and subsequent resentment in claudia. how justified he would be in thinking this isn’t the point, my fellow claudia stans--the point is that he would think it and it would be a natural extension of his character. it also makes him letting claudia go even more meaningful--not only does he not want to “force her to choose” like he did when they were kids, he also doesn’t want her to feel tied down the way he might have been.

this letting her go thing is ironically enough counterproductive, and will likely lead to the same sort of resentment viren has for soren. soren has “broken up the family again.” after everything they’re done for him, he just turns his back on them, from claudia’s point of view. the series would be quite different if soren was more forceful about getting claudia to leave with him or made a stronger case for leaving viren, but there are real reasons why he wouldn’t do this and when it comes to his family he’s actually quite conflict-averse. and like it would make his speech about thinking that viren was a good man more impactful, and like it’s not like the speech isn’t cheesy as hell already.

[random-user753]

✨ New meta by @cross-my-heartt dropped ✨ - it's 🎶lunch time🎶

More seriously: You bring forth a lot of really good arguments and it's intriguing to replay TBB03 in my head with your added commentary. So I'd like to add my two cents.

First of all, "We’re meant to believe that his time on Tantiss and Hemlock’s attempted reconditioning has changed him as a person. Which is all fine and dandy until you realize that this new character we get feels more like he’s gone through therapy rather than trauma." rings very true. It's like Omega changes him through her sheer prescense into a big softie - it's inhearently not a bad idea, but it happens way too fast. I could imagine that Cross three years later has tuned down his aggressions and his urge to defend himself but in the span of one day I don't see him leaving his very combative and confrontative personality behind, especially if reuniting with the Batch means that he was wrong - and oh boy, I don't think that Crosshair of all persons would admit this openly during the first months back together. It would be more like "a certain lieutenant let me down personally" instead of "I was wrong about the Empire as whole".

Also "he rolls over at the first sign of conflict" - looking at episode 4 I agree. The guy who started a fight with Jesse over curious looks is the same who lets himself be ordered around by a child? Feels ooc to me. (Personally, I would have let them play cards as doubles in this scene because it would have underlined that they work together now as brother and sister without hierarchies and it would have been an awesome opportunity to let Crosshair show off his amazing eyesight like in utilizing some tiny mirror in the background to see the Imps cards! And probably Crosshairs sparkling personality would have let the situation escalate far more earlier so that the detour with the animal smuggling would have been superfluous.)

"[T]hese first two season have felt like they were steadily building towards a confrontation between these two." - Exactly, after all the second season hammered Hunters POV through Crosshairs thick skull that he's replaceable for the Empire. So a call-back to the training room argument would have been perfect to tie all of it up and to reestablish a meaningful connection between them and let's be real: Hunter still owes Crosshair an apology for not trying more.

Regarding the PTSB-bit: When you put it like that (personally, I think it's grand that they even tried to include this ugly side-effect of torture and war), my knee-jerk reaction is "you're so right". After all, Crosshairs conflict up to this point was to discover that being loyal towards a cruel system doesn't give him anything, being loyal towards people/family gives him purpose and courage. To conclude this I had expected/hoped that he joins Echo and the Clone rebellion as atonement and because of his insider information.

Earning again the trust of his family and even more the other clones would have been a compelling sub-plot, even more when the mistrust runs deeper than "oww, he's a Dad, ofc we have to trust him" (sorry, this scene is cute and everything but when looked at it more closely it feels hollow, there I agree as well besides the Howzer-bashing that went on). But this couldn't happen due to time issues (albeit these were partially home-made considered that this season was the shortest of all three by far).

The PTSB-bit would have fitted better to Wrecker as a response to Techs "death" or the loss of Omega since he had no compelling sub-plot of his own so far (except the chip-thing, but that's more chip-plot than truely a Wrecker-plot). Loosing his strength or his ability to run odd jobs to care for Omega would probably influence him a lot. Otherwise, Hunter would be a candidate for this - after all, his senses are in Season 3 nowhere near the level that they had in TCW07, so experiencing that his senses are on the fritz would have amplified his character arc because as a family father, he doesn't need them anymore.

Anyway, these are only some thoughts that crossed my mind after reading your meta.

Thanks a lot for sharing, as usual it's a joy to see you on my dash 🤩 - stay safe!

Alright, I’m saying it

I hate what they did with Crosshair in season three

Yes, the entirety of season three, barring maybe only the first three episodes. Let me elaborate.

I’ve been seeing people be more open about criticizing the finale and it’s given me the push to be more open about my own thoughts. And since I still advertise myself as a Crosshair girlie, I think this is a good place to start.

I really honestly don’t like the majority of what they did with Crosshair’s character this season. And yes, that includes the hand tremors. From the myriad things that felt out of character for him to making him a walking exposition dump, to completely stripping him of his more interesting qualities I honestly struggle to see him as the same character I loved right up until the end of season two.

I almost understand why so many people have come around on him – it’s because he’s a completely different character. We’re meant to believe that his time on Tantiss and Hemlock’s attempted reconditioning has changed him as a person. Which is all fine and dandy until you realize that this new character we get feels more like he’s gone through therapy rather than trauma.

New Crosshair is much more agreeable. He’s mild, he rolls over at the first sign of conflict, he talks about his emotions at the drop of a hat and there’s barely any meaningful tension between him and the other characters (not one that’s not forced anyways).

And my question is, why? If we’re just going to use off screen trauma (off. screen. trauma???) to change characters willy nilly then what even is the point of watching a show?

Say I suddenly wanted to make Wrecker this very angry character with a short fuse and I decide that he got an injury off screen that’s causing him chronic pain. It makes sense logically while at the same time making zero sense for him, even less so if you don’t see it play out, because it erases core parts of the character that we already know.

One of the first things Crosshair does in tcw is start a fight. Crosshair has always been a belligerent guy. He literally responds to being hurt by attacking. Where is that combativeness now? I would even go as far as to say that he’s been the primary source of conflict for the group since season one and I don’t even mean that in a bad way. Crosshair bites back. He hides pain by trying to inflict it, he talks back, he challenges, he digs his heels in to the point of proactively making bad life choices.

And the reason why he’s worked so well in this team so far is because his tendencies were counteracted by those around him, right up until the inevitable rift caused by the chip. I could go on about Wrecker and Tech but we all know that the main counterbalance, Crosshair’s foil here, is Hunter. Hunter is supposed to be the one that deescalates, they’ve gotten along so far because he’s the one that handled rising tensions (it’s the reason he’s the leader of their group to begin with. Remember who deescalated that fight in tcw? Remember who started it?) Where Crosshair pushes, Hunter puts a stop to it. Where Crosshair attacks, Hunter deflects, maybe sometimes too much.

And these first two season have felt like they were steadily building towards a confrontation between these two. We wanted Hunter to snap at Crosshair on Pabu because we’ve been craving it. This whole time Crosshair’s been saddled with more and more trauma, unresolved tensions from as far back as season one (which we all seem to have forgotten about as if that story never happened, tldr I’m still bitter no one addressed the Crosshair being abandoned subplot, hello remember that) while the narrative has simultaneously been stripping Hunter of his patience; months of anxiety and frustration and stress chipping away at him and wearing him down so that we can finally get to see these characters clash. The perfect recipe for all of that tension exploding and being set loose.

And what did we get instead?

A tiny little spat. An argument that gets interrupted before fizzling out (because Crosshair can talk about feelings all of a sudden). We got Hunter in the exact right position only for the show to purposefully strip Crosshair of his characteristic belligerence because apparently we don’t want to see any conflict. It’s like they’re teasing us – look Hunter’s on the verge of snapping but Crosshair’s the bigger man now so we don’t get to see that! Why??? What part of that was satisfying?? We got Crosshair pushing back for the tiniest of seconds and resolved two seasons of tension in half an episode. Where they had to fight a giant worm. In what universe is that a satisfying conclusion.

The only reason I can think of is that this mirror development is supposed to be some kind of irony or subversion but honestly that explanation falls so flat in the face of our expectations as an audience.

And the thing is, I think even the authors realized that they had nuked their most intriguing character. Because once they removed his established response to trauma, which was all of those wonderfully complex emotional reactions, they realized they needed to manifest it in some other way. So we got the hand tremors.

Now Crosshair doesn’t get angry or stubborn he just gets jittery. And I know this sounds dismissive but the only reason that is is because the show itself deals with it in a completely ham-fisted and surface-level way.

I hated the hand tremor subplot. Me. Someone who spent two years being disabled because of neural damage to my hands that prevented me from doing the hobbies I used to define myself as a person. Someone who spent two years depressed and dysfunctional because of the loss of identity and purpose I suffered because of that disability.

So no I’m not fucking happy that they used something as serious as ptsd to spice up a character they themselves made bland in the first place. For no reason other than a subplot that went literally nowhere. A subplot that was shish kebabed after an underwhelming fight scene.

Don’t even get me started on the pun level writing of chopping said hand off.

But back to Crosshair… or what’s left of him after this season (see I can make a pun too). Crosshair was already interesting enough as a character without the added hand tremor subplot and I'm dying on that hill.

The thing is, they were so intent on pushing this new, watered down version of Crosshair that even more reasonable, level-headed characters had to be thrown under the bus, made irrationally aggressive next to him to try and make us believe it. I have a lot to say about Howzer this season but the only thing I’ll say for now is that he’s the most prominent victim of this, along with his entire retconned season one plotline.

And speaking of victims, I can’t help but feel like I need to apologize to all the Tech fans out there once again. Because what I think actually happened is that Tech was never the writers’ favorite and was never meant to get any sort of satisfying conclusion.

That was always Crosshair.

The focal point of season one. The most prominent source or drama and conflict. The character who drove the plot forward even when he appeared in a fraction of episodes. The character who got the most development (even if that development spiraled wildly out of control at the end). Nearly every major subplot in this show happened in relation to or in favor of Crosshair’s arc. Tech’s death. Omega’s capture. The CX clones. The hand tremors. All of the meaningful developments and events reserved for two characters in this show, Omega and Crosshair. (Some would argue Hunter as well but really, did Hunter get any development as a character? Spoiler alert, a happy ending is not the same as a character arc.)

My guess is that this was always meant to be the case. The writers just weren’t prepared for the fans’ response to Tech’s death, it caught them off guard, and here’s one more reason why I think creators should stay away from social media or any kind of prolonged fan interaction. Because all it got us in the end was some form of cruel teasing, them trying to ride the wave of attention and thinking their original plans would make up for it when that wave inevitably crashed.

But anyway.

What happens when you dump a bunch of pain and suffering onto a character with a problematic response to adversity? Apparently it makes them emotionally intelligent, at least according to this show. Crosshair in season three feels like a shadow of his former self – the combativeness and complex emotional responses that made him so interesting to begin with are gone, replaced with a ham-fisted manifestation of trauma that gets resolved in an equally ham-fisted way.

And I’m just not on board with that. Nor will I ever be. Even if you give me all the supposed emotional payoffs, hugs or whatever.