#IT WASNT THIS SERIOUS BEFORE I JUST REALLY LIKED THE CHARACTER

[cloudbends]

I've been in a pretty bad headspace for the past week but it mostly made me realize that what was before just "oh I love this little catholic guilt ridden bird allegory with a beautiful design from the gacha game" became "I have never mentally resonated with a character more and this is getting scary" very quickly

[dullahandyke]

didnt even touch on the sandra lynn stuff int he tags of the last post bcos if i talk about her im liable to explode. get behind me, middle-aged divorced woman proficient in archery

[killjoy-prince]

I now know the context for the 'Doctor... you're huge' line

[mcsm-confessions]

i love shipping as much as the next person but i also really like to focus on just the characters and their dynamics outside of a shipping thing.

like for example, i LOVE olivia. i love her deeply. i even have an entire au centered around her and how she would react to losing someone she cared about. i want to explore her character more, and i think it's lovely that she's sarcastic and intelligent. i also wish she wasn't just completely reduced to being a "mom friend" or just to be shipped with axel.

i LOVE axel x olivia. i think they're very cute. but i would like it if they weren't completely boiled down to that.

speaking of axel: I LOVE AXEL!!!! he's protective and stubborn and selfish but nearing the end he sets aside his selfishness to nearly sacrifice himself to protect his friends. AND THAT'S AMAZING. but everyone just . demonizes him for being mean to lukas for a while [AND HE WAS MEAN RIGHTFULLY SO.] and. also. btw. axel is fat. axel is fat why does everyone just draw him skinny he's LITERALLY FAT IT IS, WHILE UNFORTUNATELY SAID VIA FAT JOKES, LITERALLY TOLD TO YOUR FACE that he is FAT. there is nothing WRONG with being fat. do you think. that making him skinny. will right the wrongs of those jokes. ALSO. BY THE WAY. I HAVE SEEEEEEENNNNN PEOPLE TRY TO REMOVE AXEL'S UNIBROW. YOU CAN'T BE SERIOUS. im so sorry im just. urgh. okay. whew.

on to lukas: he's not as soft as everyone thinks he is. that's it. he's sarcastic and witty and snappy and pissy. he's not your pathetic uwu soft boy that everyone wants to portray him ass. im sick of everyone reducing him down to that just for jesskas. im sick of it. i like jesskas. its GREAT. its cute! but it's all done wrong. its all done so so so wrong. he can abso-LUTELY be pathetic, yes! but that isnt his ENTIRE character.

before i finish this, i have ONE more character to talk about.

HARPER.

EVERYONE JUST. everyone just boils harper down to being ivor's wife. hey i love their dynamic and i think they're a very cute couple. but i would like a bit of more focus on harper's character herself and her dynamics with everyone else. she's snappy, she's sarcastic and quick-witted, she feels deep guilt and is desperately trying to convince herself that it wasnt her fault. she knows what's going on, and she feels so much fucking guilt. AND I WANT THAT EXPLORED. I WANT THAT EXPLORED AS MUCH AS IVOR'S GUILT IS EXPLORED. im gonna fucking lose it. i love harper and everyone just. uurrrghhhh.

this is what i see the most in the mcsm fandom and. honestly. i genuinely wish that people would look more into these characters rather than just boiling them down to Basic Traits.

~~~

[deathbringerdragon]

In a specifically goober mood today so time to info dump about my second monkey wrench oc that yall haven't heard about yet.

This is them. They don't have a name yet. Tbh idk if they're fully/truly osteon or not. But since there's so little info on osteon biology, I just call them an osteon.

The pictures are just a hosposh of all of the in work progress screenshots I've been posting in the oc fan servers I'm in. So some of these have sections that are out of date to the current version with the rest up to date

Now for some of the lore that ive posted in said servers.

so i've had the idea that my osteon oc was friends with JB before either of them became infected.

what their relationship was like exactly im not sure. since we know literally NOTHING about jb was like or what he did or Anything before infection, other than what he looks like.

alls i know is that they were at least close.

and- like-

pretty much my oc has been there since Day One for JB since becoming infected and a pirate.

JB went off and became an infected pirate first. Then came back as asked my oc if they were willing to take the chance and go with him.

Cuz right before JB had left, my oc had told him that they dont care what he does, they'll chase him down and find him no matter what so they can play video games together. And then while JB was gone, some incident happened with him that made him question if what his friend from before said was actually true. Maybe some cruel pirate or the like broke JB down emotionally and more or less said "Someone like you is going to die alone, abandoned by everyone you thought were your friends, and betrayed by those closest to you" because he was infected.

So thats why JB went back to find my oc cuz, he just needed the confirmation that what the other pirate said Wasnt true (cuz remember, this is like, Right after jb became a pirate. so he's still somewhat in the "normal dude" mentality)

Wanted to more or less test his closest friend to see if they would be scared of him or not cuz of his infection/how he looks.

And so anyways he pretty much corners my oc and is like "*You said you'd chase me down wherever i go. So, now that ya see what im like now. Are you still willin' t' keep that promise?"*

And after a long beat of silence, my oc just goes "You should know what the answer is. I dont care what you become. A monster, a killer. I'll just become the same thing so we can still be together"

and HHFHGHDNNFDGH they're just friends i swear-

ANYWAYS SO-

after that whole situation (cuz like, the actual scenes in my head were, intense. like. Serious character moments)

my oc joins JB and becomes a part of his crew, and pretty much right-hand man.

the OTHER idea i had, and the original idea. Was that my Oc was actually originally a rival plague walking pirate, who after several encounters with JB and his crew, and having the whole "Are they/arent they flirting" type of rivalry with him, they decide to join his crew, and become close but volatile friends. like. both of them are like "I never gotta question if they have my back in a battle. But i dont trust a single fucking piece of food they give me cuz idk what they might've put in it" kind of friends. and its hilarious.

For a long time i was really unsure which idea i wannted to go with cuz like. on one hand, i absolutely love the back and forth these two dumbass assholes would have if they became friends after being rivals forever.

but at the same time i also really like the undying loyalty/closeness of the idea of the two having been friends since the Start.

in the end, I decided to go with them being friends from the beginning. But since my original idea was for them to meet after, they still have bits of that original idea mixed in to their relationship.

BUT EITHER WAY-

no matter what.

Yall see how broke open their skull is in the sketches i've been posting?

Yea.

their skull wasnt broke open like that in the beginning

[syllarinfirinne]

I was thinking about Critical Role last night, I have been thinking about it a lot recently as I have been finally working my way through the Aeor arc of Campaign 2, and specifically about Campaign 3.

I fell off of Campaign 3 a couple times and dove back in trying to catch up before finally just saying Maybe Another Time/Maybe After Its Over around the time of them finding the Fire Titan Shard, because tbh, I got bored of the constant circular debate about defending/killing the gods, but I still think aobut it a lot because I liked the narrative Matt had built, love Exandria, and even liked Bells Hells as characters.

The reason I dont think it really clicked for me, and seemingly others, is I dont think Bells Hells is the right party for this story, and that it wouldve worked better with either all different characters, or as a shorter Epic Tier arc for Vox Machina or The Mighty Nein. Because, like, Bells Hells, at the start of their campaign is probably the party least connected to the Gods, either in a positive or negative light, especially compared to late game Vox Machina or Basically Any Point Mighty Nein.

Vox Machina had:

Grog: No connection to the Gods at the beginning of the campaign, finds some religious awakening with the Stormlord.

Keyleth: Strongly anti-organized religion at the beginning of the campaign, comes to resent the Matron of Ravens because of everything that happened with Vax.

Percy: Has a strong distaste for magic in any form, either of the arcane OR Divine persuasion, sees it as a shortcut that cheapens human ingenuity, despite that ruler of a city watched over by the Dawn Father with a respect for the Dawnfather.

Pike: Devotee of the Everlight, occasionally struggles with her devotion but one of the Everlights most ardent followers.

Scanlan: No strong connection to the Gods for most of the campaign, is smiled on by The Knowing Mistress during the Vecna arc.

Vax: His struggles with his sense of purpose push him towards religion early in the campaign and his love for his sister thrusts him into the service of the Matron of Ravens, eventually becoming her Paladin and Champion.

Vex: Defends the Dawnfathers city, but like Keyleth has a strong resentment towards the Matron for in their eyes Taking Vax.

The Mighty Nien had:

Caducius: Ardent follower of the Wildmother, helps guide Fjord towards enlightement in the Wildmothers eyes.

Caleb: After he broke mentally was broughtback to clarity by a follower of the Arch Heart.

Beau: Monk of the Cobalt Soul, and therefore a follower of The Knowing Mistress, while not overtly religious she has no problem presenting herself as a follower of the Mistress.

Fjord: Warlock of a creation of the Betrayer God Zehir who eventually finds redemption in the light of The Wildmother.

Jester: Cleric devouted to a Demi-God/Arch Fey who has a Less Than Great reputation with the Pantheon.

Nott/Veth: afaik basically no connection to the gods.

Yasha: Follower and adherent of The Stormlord, who lifted her from the brink of death and despair but challenges her in extreme and difficult ways.

I dont know, I just feel like either of those groups of characters would have had a more tangible connection to a plot related to killing the gods than a group consisting of two people who felt their prayers went unanswered, two people with no real care or connection to the gods, a cleric looking for a god, and a guy who is kinda connected to the Wildmother.

And, again, I dont think Bells Hells are a BAD adventuring party, I just think their adventuring and story shouldve maybe touched on the source of Imogens powers, but also spent serious time exploring the rest of the new characters backstories, and found another Main Plot that wasnt this.

[sonicnerd]

Amber

Alright, guess imma have to

First of all, the way they grew up:

Amber has privileges since she is a royal and we've seen how some royals act , specifically, clio and Hildegard.

Amber is used to having people do things for her which is kinda to be expected since she is a royal and she grew up with that kind of life. Jade , she grew up not privileged and you'd think she'd be grateful to have whatever she can but no, she's mad that her friend gets to have a family , if you ask me , that's toxic

Next,

Amber as we see later as the show goes on and specifically in season 3 & 4 (mostly 4) she improves and learns from her mistakes and becomes a better sister with time , hear that? With. Time. She. Becomes. Better. And. Improves.

Jade on the other hand, you may say "I'm only focusing on the bad episode", let's look at the other episode, the one where balilywick came along , Jade didn't go anything cause this episode was mainly just roland being worried about his daughter and wanted her to be safe so that's why balilywick was there and how Sofia didn't need to be protected or treated differently, yes there might have been a different lesson there but I got the basic stuff from it. And the other episode, that was Sofia and Cedric based , when they went to see the sorcerers, that was Sofia helping Cedric and Cedric dad see eye to eye while the other buttercups did good deeds. Other than that, Jade is toxic/bad.

So , Amber has character development to be better to others and to her sister. Jade doesn't really have any of that other than when she's not with Sofia

The sleep over episode "oh their just kids having fun 🥺", no! Would you like it if someone acted like that in your home?? I think the fuck not. Even if they were having fun you'd think they'd at least try to you know, not mess stuff up and have manners at someone else's place and be respectful , ESPECIALLY to ROYALS. Even though they are friends, still, be respectful of others homes

The one episode where it was where Sofia had to pick between her royal friends and her village friends. She was basically forced into playing with the villagers, and let's not forget, she was still getting used to being a royal . That whole episode was just non stop back and forth of who Sofia should choose. Like, Sofia wanted to play for the royals and her "friends" hated her for doing that and "betraying" them, they said that they never won a game before so what was the point of if Sofia was on their team or not. Then when Ruby gave Jade the same treatment, she didn't like it but went right back to being a lil bitch to Sofia. Even when Sofia joined their team , Jade was so bitchy about it as if she wasn't BEGGING Sofia to come back to them which wouldn't have made a difference at all if even with Sofia THEY STILL LOST PREVIOUS GAMES , and yes the only reason they won is cause of how the show was written.

And when Lucinda was changing to be a good witch. She was raised to be bad, she didn't know any other way to act. And OTHERS forgave her since they saw how much she was changing and willing to help un-hex everything. And we all saw that trap, of that trap cussed that much damage, just what would happen if this WASNT. A kids show?? It would have caused serious injury.

The episode where they had to build their flying carriage thingy, both Ruby and Jade were bad in that episode. Sofia tried everything to get them to her friends again but they only wanted to spend time with Amber , Amber was used to everyone wanting to be her friend so she didn't even notice . "Oh she's a bad sister for not realizing-" stfu!! The only reason she didn't notice is cause she was , oh my God, you won't believe it, SHE WAS HAVING FUN 😮🫢. Ik, it's hard to believe that when it's obvious you haven't fully watched how amber grows as a character unlike Ruby and Jade , specifically Jade

Now respectfully, go away. All you Jade supporters have this one painful thing in common. Going after Amber , a character WITH CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT, when poorly defending Jade

Now if you were actually able to read this, go watch all four seasons THEN come back to me if you really wanna compare Jade to Amber who yet again HAS CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT

Bye!! 😚😚

[fuselsstuff]

Why i am so excited to have the Bucktommy storyline

Buck, the wild child, the hot head, overthinker, the talker, always a little much, but thats him, and he is so so loved.

He is the little brother of his found family, and in their heads he will allways be just that, so he gets all these backhanded compliments, like

" he doesnt know your an Idiot yet, but he will love you anyway like we all do"

He is such a competent person/firefighters but sometimes he doesnt get taken serious because his ideas doesnt seem thought trough, and it looks like He is just doing stuff without thinking, but thats his neurodivergent brain, people with Adhd sometimes dont have the words for their Plans and Action, they just know it (its like that With my Brain, i dont say everybody is like this)

And then we have his past realtionships,

Abby, she really really liked him, but she had her own demons to deal with, she couldnt be what Buck needed.

Allie, she knew what she gets herself into, so she broke it off before she could really fall for him and i think thats very honorable.

Taylor got Buck, she knew exactly who he is, and she was there for him, but maybe they were to similar, i dont think it would have worked out in the long term.

Natalia, well, cant say much about her.

Our boy just wants to come home to somebody that gets him, not just says that, but really really gets him, shows up for him, takes him seriously and is his person.

And yes we could debate that he has Eddie, these two have a wonderfull friendship, and i admire that. Its deep, its vunerable, they are there for each other, both need eachother, and they trust eachother, its beautiful.

But for now, its exactly that, its a beautiful friendship.

(side note... The will? That doesnt make Buck a coparent, it makes him Chris' godfather basically)

And now to his current realtionship, Tommy. I think its perfect, and the first thing i want to point out, the comunication. Buck is a talker, but no comunicator, if people dont tell him exactly what they think, he is gonna asume what they think, and well, when was that ever a good thing right? There are a lot of examples where Bucks missing comunication turned into Problems.

Tommy does comunicate, i mean... He drive to his loft before his shift, to clear the air. After He kisses him, he doesnt run away, he asks him if that was okay and then asks him out on a date. Do we have to talk about the date? He was smooth, polite and open, he didnt run away before he cleared it up to him "your adorable but i dont think your ready" comunication my friends! The Coffee meet up? " you allready know i am interested" I mean how much clearer can it get? And also that he told him that the Coffee wasnt what he would order, its a small thing but i think its just as honest and important.

And he Shows up for him, Bachelorparty and wedding! He is there because of him. The scene where Buck looks on his phone before Tommy arrives? I could feel those butterflys, *somebody is here because of me* such an amazing feeling.

I could go on and on on how amazing the character choice of Tommy is but then this would get far too long, i am Sure there are a lot of posts that point out why its so cool to have an "old" Character back.

To get back to the start, Buck is loved, he is a Idiot but with a heart of gold, truly a golden Retriever.

But its the difference between *Buck, your such an Idiot, i love you anyway* to *i love you because you are an Idiot, Evan* that makes it for me.

Thanks for reading until here, i needed to get that out, feel free to add points!

But for now i enjoy this mature and hopefully domestic realtionship for buck storyline waaay to much <3

[hwa-ae]

can you write shinyu as reader's tutor pls? ty

Tutor —

: ̗̀⇢pairings: shinyu x gn! reader

: ̗̀⇢synopsis: IN WHICH shinyu helps you with math, but you get a little curious about why he agreed to tutor you and not anyone else

: ̗̀⇢genre: fluff, sfw

: ̗̀⇢warnings: confession out of nowhere (for my socially awkward readers who might get second hand embarrassment)

"shinyu, i really really dont understand how to do this question. can you please please explain it again?" you whined, pushing the math paper towards his direction as he looked at you dead in the eye.

"[name] you know you cant bring me to the exam with you, right? think carefully! I've explained this question to you beforehand!" shinyu sighed, pushing the paper back to you, pointing at the question as if it would spark up the steps and answer to the question.

"but i really dont remember! shinyu, please explain it to me again... please?" you pleaded, holding your hands up together as you begged for him to do his job as a tutor and help you.

shinyu stared at you for a few moments before sighing and reaching for his pen which has rolled away while he wasnt looking, giving in to your begging whines and pleading pouts.

"im only going to explain this question one last time, okay? i wont be explaining this to you again." he said sternly before explaining the question, to which you just smiled and nodded along, knowing that he would give in to you and explain it to you again if you just begged a few times with a cute pout.

"ohh... i think i understand now..." you mumbled, nodding your head softly as shinyu hands you back your paper.

"good, now solve this question yourself," shinyu praised, pointing to a smiliar question before watching you solve it with serious eyes.

"hm... shinyu?" you mumbled, solving your question halfway before interrupting the comfortable silence.

"yes?"

"why did you agree to tutor me but not anyone else? i heard you rejected all of them." you asked mindlessly, still writing down equations, not noticing the fumbling mess you made him as he tried to think of an excuse to your question.

"uh... uhm... well..." he stutters out, acting oddly out of character, making you look up at him with concerned eyes. "its because they're not you..."

"what?" you froze.

"sorry, forget what i said!" shinyu immediately tried to move on, rearranging the already well arranged papers to try and forget about what just happened.

"shinyu, correct me if im wrong but, do you like me?" you asked teasingly, finding the ever so composed class president's clumsy state adorable.

he nodded slowly, turning his head away and covering the lower half of his face with his hand, allowing you to see the red tips of his ears.

"i like you too."

this time, it was shinyu who froze.

"are you being serious? you're not messing with me right?" he turned his head back to look at you so fast you were worried he would break his neck.

you giggled softly, nodding along as his face lit up immediately.

"can i bring you on a date?" he asked with wide puppy-like eyes and a bright grin, anticipating your reply.

"right now?"

"yes, right now!"

"haha! of course!"

© 2024, hwa-ae ♥︎

do not steal, plagiarise or translate my work on any platforms!

[peaterookie]

Found this cool drawing i made, possibly a concept of demon lupin before i made his actual design.

orrr it could just be a cool outfit i wanted to draw on him. either way it made me want to also share my other concepts of dem lup and ang goe and explain my design

i knew the first one wasnt gonna be final obvs because i was kinda thinking on dem lup's initial role. when i landed on him being kinda the prince of the underworld and deciding he aint for that i wanted to show through his outfit that he's carefree and chill but also has a rich kid vibe lol

seeing the lupin's canon design already sorta shows it I didn't really change much of it in the end. the punkish? outfit above was just too extra for him imo

before i wanna show the design i landed on I also wanna mention this drawing since this was the drawing that started the au in the first place. i casually drew this in class along with angel goemon, and lupin was the only one that ended up getting redrawn on digital.

ok there we go

this was very rough and rushed since I didn't really think this au was really gonna be serious and stuff (still isn't but im sorta invested in developing it in my head now)

one thing youll notice is that lupin's horns are red for most of these drawings and also much longer. while this is fine i decided to change it to stubby white horns later on for a more symbolic reason.

Lupin's personality is this au is leaning more on cagli lupin with some roughness to it. he's deep down a kindhearted character. bros totally fucking chill he's really not evil at all. but given how he's raised in a pretty fucked up and evil place he still behaves a bit like a rat

to show that behind that scary and evil exterior, his horns are white to show his purity and kindness. they're also stubby to show his lack of aggression

demon's horns in this au also show their inherent mental and physical health in a way. if they're long and sharp they are healthy, if it's the opposite they're probably not doing so well. I'll let you guys figure out what this could mean for lupin.

let's move onnn tooo goemonn

the main reason why that first reference above was not kept was because of how bad the outfit for goemon was, i was honestly embarrassed at myself even then for not figuring out something better and i really struggled to make the colors work LMAO

eventually as i developed his personality and beliefs, the more this got easier for me and i finally arrived at the design you see now.

i think you can tell at this point that i really really love using colors to convey symbolism throughout my designs.

for this au it is primarily white and black. white represents what you typically think of the angel, a purehearted being. and black is the impure and demonic color, it represents the ugly side of things. even then black does not represent evil or should be interpretted as a sign that the character is bad.

this is especially with goemon. the outfit you see above is the one he adorns after he has accepted his demon half.

before this his outfit would have been completely white, to show the repression of the trait that he felt hatred and disgust towards because he has been taught that it was dirty and ugly. lupin would end up helping him realize that it is not the case and he should accept the way he is.

but yeah anyways this design is way better lmao. also note that i also changed his wings to be half-bird half-bat, so this means he would not be able to fly during the beginning because he wants to conceal his demon side. it is not only ruining him mentally but also physically.

anyways, since ive explained lupin's personality i should also explain what I've changed for goemon too. i think it's best to say that its a combination of anime and manga goe, since he is a bit more serious, stubborn, and misguided, but still has the gentle and graceful mannerisms of manga goe. he's also a bit sassier too, he counters and compliments lupin's carefreeness

anyways this is like totally not organized at all lol, I just wanted to ramble on about these designs since I've put a lotta thought into it and wanted to share it given the nice feedback i got on the reference post. (if you haven't seen it, check it out!)

since my job is done now, I'll see you guys later. bye!

[lorax-devito]

castle Byers

Okay so a theory for ST season5 is that there will be time travel,as I’m sure we all know

it’s not my fav theory but it has a lot of potential

so I think what if they go back to Byers house in S5,Will hasn’t seen his house since they moved to Cali and there’s someone new living there (we wouldn’t get to meet them bc no new characters or Eddies Uncle moves in there bc he doesn’t want to live in the trailer anymore bc of hate crimes against Eddie and finding Chrissys body was really traumatic for him and he keeps seeing her lifeless,broken body whenever he steps inside,with Eddies voice echoing “IT WASNT ME,I SWEAR”)anyway the house is messy,falling apart and there’s not much furniture inside (El would open the door or smth also the messy part adds to wayne living there bc he’s so torn apart about Eddies death he kinda just gives up also he wouldn’t have enough money to finish the place) basically fast forward to them finding a gate in the house,getting stuck in the UD (this gives Will serious PTSD from season 1 but ‼️WARNING BYLER CONTENT‼️ mike comforts him and it’s sweet-we all know Will deserves at least a little sunshine in the cluster-fuck,world ending thunder storm he’s living in) while in the UD Mike and Will go and rebuild Castle Byers/go and see it,Mike finds a picture of him and Will there,he knows exactly what picture it is,he has the same on on his desk in a similar frame to the one on his bedside table of him and Will on the night of the snowball,only this picture was taken wayyyy before they met El,the picture was exactly like the original just it was distorted,except for 2 faces,his and Wills were normal,their beaming smiles and pinkish-red cheeks showed up perfectly on the page ,as well as their arms which were slung around each others shoulders,Will had to go on his tiptoes of course because of how much taller Mike was than him then,Will is still shorter than Mike but only a tad and he’s less,scrawny and more *mike glances at will lifting smth heavy and feels his cheeks heat up* muscular now.Mike put the picture in his pocket as he looks around more,he can see the torn up pillows and scratch marks on the fallen branches

“the demogorgan?” Mike asked sheepishly

“yeah”Will said rubbing his bare forearm nervously

“Sorry If I’m acting weird I’m just a little,on edge”Will said with a slight chuckle

“yeah me too”Mike said still rummaging though the cluttered branches

umm this turned into an AO3 story 💀

Anyway,my point is Wayne would be in the UD and finally know what actually happens to Will whilst also being really confused about why his house looks like that also just So.Much.Byler.Potential

also the bit about the picture and the faces was meant to mean that while Will was is the UD in S1 he used it to cope,and the thing that mattered most to him was Mike (obviously he cares about Dustin and Lucas but yk what I mean) and so the picture slowly while Will was there started to de-UD or smth idk 💀

Thanks for reading if you got this far i might add to this later bc I like to yap about Byler 😭

[rottenpumpkin13]

I think the biggest factor re: Seph being the only one who broke down so spectacularly is that he actually had the power to back it up.

Everything about how he was raised, what was done to him, and the perfect storm of Nibelheim just lined up perfectly with the fact that he actually had the power to back up his breakdown.

Like no one else is as strong as Sephiroth. Other characters whos only major kneejerk problem solving skill (violence) simply do not have his firepower. He has the magic, he has the physical power, he has the skill.

The games have power creep and all so its hard to see this, but Sephiroth in the lore was just totally unmatched except for Cloud in terms of what a single person could do. Zack is crazy strong, and Sephiroth had to have been sleep deprived and not eating for a week and mentally compromised for Zack and Cloud to just barely win and nearly die in the process.

Sephiroth has the biggest rampage because he has the tools to do it in a way that any of the other people on a violent mental breakdown bender simply do not.

I dont think, strictly speaking, the reason why he broke down like that specifically was simply because he was always destined to do so - I dont think he was destined to always go evil- but it was 100% only a matter of time before he simply couldnt take the strain of everything and had a serious mental breakdown of some kind. Eventually the untreated trauma just piles up so much you cant function anymore.

He didnt have to have chosen violence as his method of mental breakdown, but with the situation as it was, that is what he landed on. He could have just as easily chosen to take his own life or made a beeline for the brass and killed them all instead given other circumstances.

Without Jenova whispering in his ear, he probably would have chosen one of those, I think. In even fairly well adjusted people irl, discovering what unnecessary violating medical atrocities were done to you as a child secondhand off your medical records is often incredibly harrowing.

Theres just so many layers to why Sephiroth snapped and why Sephiroth behaved like that beforehand.

When characterizing him, I feel like people really undersell and underestimate what chronic trauma starting from childhood does to your sense of self, decisionmaking skills, emotional regulation, and ability to cope with shock.

Like without the way he was raised, he would simply not be the same person. Chronic childhood trauma becomes your sense of self when you experience it because your sense of self was forming when you were put through all of that. Its baked into your bones and how your brain is wired.

A Sephiroth who was raised in a loving family that wasnt medically violated or stuck in a lab or trained as a child soldier and set loose in war and put up as a carefully cultivated symbol would simply be unrecognizable. He would not act the same, he would not have the same preferences, he would not have the same insecurities or instability. He wouldnt be recognizably Sephiroth- not just because no cat eyes and white hair.

Because to be Sephiroth, he has to be incredibly traumatized by default.

Im not saying that his trauma of all the characters was the Most Awful and therefore he blew up the worst or w/e, but more that this multilayered complex trauma left Sephiroth unable to healthily cope with all the events piled on him during the events of Crisis Core.

I think the factor of how childhood trauma and continued abuse completely shapes how you respond to things as an adult is often lost in the discourse when people try to detangle Sephiroth's actions, so thank you for pointing that out.

Another thing, when talking about how Sephiroth's power is unmatched, is the Jenova cells in him (and how he later became one with Jenova) The only thing that took down Jenova was the Cetra because it/she was that powerful. So while he wasn't destined to break down, you have to admit that something was waiting to happen given what Jenova was.

[3grey-morals5]

hcs-scp/035x049😎😎😎(hc3)

I decided to set aside my other headcanon list last minute (it being alagadda) just due to it not feeling right or interesting. In it's place I will be writing up this. Sorry to anyone who followed me for art or sarkicism, I promise that will be back shortly I'm just in a writing funk.

DO NOTE. this is a ship/pairing hc post! If you do not like it, do kindly leave. Something else to know is that this will include both healthy and more unhealthy relationship segments. If that is something that upsets you, don't feel bad to stop reading. This is only because I feel that in the modern scp setting they do not have the most healthy relationship and wish to comment on it, not that I condone any toxic behavior.

And aswell,

THESE ARE ALL JUST MY IDEAS FOR IT. NO IT MAY NOT BE TRUE TO THE CANON.

Anyways, starting off with past. This is more detailed info on the start of their relationship in Alagadda, as I have already covered some in my last hc post.

good/healthy

-Alagadda

Starting off in the past with Alagadda, something i went over some in my last post. This was before 049 was fucking over obsessed with his cure and before 035 had multiple hosts and was just one (very sad, but decent) consciousness. Due to these circumstances, they were far more stable overall both in their own lives and in their relationship.

Serious relationships were fairly rare in the city, mainly because most citizens were more into silly flings at pound town establishments than an actual commitment. Ofc, where doc came from that wasnt very well known and most relationships were just arranged marriages. Bl was like the middle ground of deciding who you want to be with for the rest of your life, not just one night.

Who'd he choose to try and court?? DING DING DING. Some gothic bird doctor guy!! Ah the thrill of breaking the rules set by bitchass ambassador~ why can't you even date foreigners anyway? These "lord guidelines" can suck it.

In media first loves are usually depicted as messy and uncaring, but I like to think of these two as the opposite. Well minus messy, it probobly was just because they didn't really know what they were doing. Like number 1 how do you even ask someone out. He has a bird mask...maybe he'll like this little cool rock I found! Yes that should get the point across.

Jolic try not to depict the BL (black lord not boy love) as a silly lovesick teen HARD EDITION like look at him. who read all the libraries' tragedies and comedies of romance? That gotta be bl. Rest in peace Anguish...you would have adored ao3 cringe...(this is a joke. Please trust I take serious characters seriously and haven't drawn him over that one purple haired emo guy picture once)

share hobbies such as ...idfk..dissection. except bl dissects literature and doc will dissect anything that's died or maybe is still alive. What are those scars on Anguish's tentacles you may ask? Oh yeah doc just needed to do a few snips to take notes of how the sludge anatomy is (a blatant lie. He was bored and his partner let's him do practically anything. Daww look he trust..so cute)

They may not fully understand eachothers hobbies, but they will still pay attention to info dumping (haha just like me abt scp I yap ALL DAY) from the other and try and to ask relevant questions. No doc may not care too much for rip van winkles 69 chapter long poetry book, but he will forever listen to bl belt his heart out about how it touched him so deeply just to see them excited and happy. And bl may be slightly disgusted by the icky wet specimens in docs bag but as soon as the birdie needs help with them or begins his rants about new graphic medical practices he read abt u bet bl is lending 4 hands or is LOCKED IN listening.

Even when their lives were on the line when the secret got out, Anguish didn't break things off to save himself and doc didn't flee to avoid certain death. They stuck together and that got them out alive and well..back to the dimensional back alley that is earth.smh.

-Earth time before the start of deterioration 😔

By now doc was far more anxious with his hallucinations back, but 035 was still with him every step of the way. Being worn by his partner, they had a symbiotic relationship and still 035 was just one pure consciousness snug with 049's. It sure took some adjusting to not having a body, and foe doc having your bf just IN YOUR MF MIND ALL THE TIME but it was a relatively calm experience.

Sorta not ship related but lemme tell yall...fat theory coming up. Yknow how. 049 make the bodies move but they have no mental really..who does cognitive stuff? 035. IM TELLING YOU THEY WORKED TOGETHER TO FULLY REVIVE PEOPLE WITH THEIR BRAIN AND ALL LIKE ARE U GETTING THIS. that's why 049 can't do it on his own bc 035 ISNT THEREEE. Anyways 🥰

Oh BTW they're actually married haha. They scared some fuckass priest into doing the ceremony in the middle of forest lavender clearing. Was the first time 035 had a host, a nice looking kindhearted fellow he found in a nearby town.(we don't talk about how terrified the bl consciousness was the first time he got a new consciousness. But they hit it off and are still besties in the hive mind. His name is Winfred.)

Not my hc, BUT I once saw someone say that they were married with flower crowns instead of rings and and OH MY GOD that has stuck with me ever since like Jesus christ you're SO RIGHT. Dyo's was oleander and Doc's was lavender ofc.

At this time 049 could still remove his mask, and he had it off for the kiss kiss and learned from the village how to braid his hair. Doc's robes were back to being plain and normal after coming back from Alagadda, but he tried his very best to fix them up nice with bits of lace and flowers. 035 just found the best clothes he could around the houses he.. Ahem..totally didn't sneak into..

Yes 035 was absolutely bawling during the ceremony.

035 traveled along with 049, either with the rare very hardy and longlasting host, on him, or in his bag. With very little hosts, the bl was able to keep them mainly in check and in control. Something that would become basically impossible in the upcoming centuries.

When he had hosts, Dyo would venture out and find little trinkets to give his bird husband. There were always very thoughtful and doc ADORED them. He still keeps them in his bag (well at least the ones he hasn't found in the depths of the bag yet, he didn't remember them in modern times and would just toss them :( )

Examples include: pressed flowers, coins, poems on scrap papers, colorful feathers, jewelry, LAVENDERRRR, a fucking truckload of handkerchiefs of various designs, quilt squares he'd snatched, old broken ceramic or porcelain peices, one singular tiny statue of a horse, a pipe or two, pretty rocks, sketches he'd done, ect.

-Start of deterioration (starts delving into a more unhealthy relationship. Stop now if you don't wish to read!)

049's mask was now firm on his face, and the lack of mental link connection only further pulled him away from his partner, aswell as the worsening of hallucinations, put strain on their marriage. He was withdrawn, no longer had time for "silly things" such as being a present partner. The addiction to his work only further feuled this tear in the relationship.

035 still did his best, struggling through the now horde of hosts to try and be the best husband possible despite his mistreatment. He'd push for breaks, clean him up after surgery, hold him close in night terrors, fix teas and dinners to try and get 049 to eat and drink.

But it was never enough.

At some point, you just can't hold on. Trying to manage 10 consciousness was enough but with the constant stress of his situation(causing more humor leakage->quicker host expiration) he needed more and more hosts to keep a body, thus, gaining more conciousnesses. They began to overpower him, causing more erratic behavior that did nothing to help the already tense situation.

This hurt them deeply, knowing he could do nothing to help them. Or himself. There was no right option. Try to save his partner? Try to save himself? Keep some control? It festered inside of him, more and more black bile bleeding from him.

docs issues didn't let up, soon viewing one he once held dearest just another block in the way of his quest of life. He had to get rid of this...pest.

Why keep him around...how was he ever of use to me. They must go. I have better things to do.

After centuries of being together, he snapped. The mask viewed their little trip as a step in the right direction...he should have known something was up. Led into a crypt, his glee was cut short at the clanks of the gate. The click of a lock. By the time he made it back to the crypt door he was already walking away, eyes glazed over ignoring the pleas from his husband.

Wait.. what are you doing..doc? Doc where are going? What's going on? DOC?! ARE YOU LISTENING? GET BACK HERE! PLEASE?! (wailing and pleading)

Dont leave me...!! please...(thud)

(Dramatic much 🙄)

-modern day. (This is toxic. 5hwy are both terrible and I hate them. For this reason I have an alternate scenario where they remember eachother and it's sweet)

In containment, they both have issues with vices. 049's being curing..ofc. while 035's is getting free (hosts as a whole) and finding his husband(bl consciousness alone.)

Do note, mentioned in earlier hc posts, the hivemind as a whole recognizes 049, but they don't know how he is important. This is due to bl explaining him, then those who heard explaining, and those who heard second explaining. So if you've ever played telephone, that's how it is. Something gets repeated so many times a bit different, so the differences at up. This as a whole creates a recognization, but unsureness how. This then morphs onto an unhealthy obsession.

Meanwhile, 049's perception is so warped due to hallucinations and his obsession with curing, that he dosent even recognize him anymore. Merely their meets are a possible useful interaction with info pertaining to the cure, and as soon as 035 isn't of use...dropped. then he is forgotten once again. The cycle restarts when they meet.

035 is the opposite, absolutely head over heels for this guy he dosent even really know. It grips at him, an itch that can ONLY be scratched by being in contact with him. An unhealthy obsession that can't be quenched no matter what. Like he NEEDS him to survive, pitching a fit every time he dosent get his way and trying to force himself upon them to get attention. Even if it hurts 049.

Want a snippet of sweetness in these trying times? Thought so. When exposed to lavender, 049 is calmer and in a sort of woozy carefree state. A daze where his only hallucinations are of happier days...curled up with a loved one in flowing lavender feilds...sun shining warm above them, clouds dappling the pale blue sky. Life is calm, life is good. But right when he turns to gaze at whomever he's laid with.

Snap.

He's back in a cell. Cold and damp. Or led by guards, feet thinking aimlessly on the metal floors. And that haze clouds his eyes yet again.

.

.

. ☀️ ☁️ ☁️ ☁️

. ☁️ 🕊 ☁️ ☁️☁️ ☁️

. '°•~-\_🌿_🌿🌿_💜🖤_🌿🌿_🌿_/-~•°'

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.

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Maybe in another life. :3

Hope yall enjoyed it! I sure did (the good ones at least) this took longer than expected, but I think it was worth it. I plan on making a short story of the future, I won't spoil too much, but I've thought it over a while and I think I'm happy with the idea. Why wait for another life when the afterlife is right there?

Thanks for reading! Love yall<3/p

[perfectlyfinespacebacon]

everything now netflix

some spoilers!! and apologies for the long post.

i honestly really enjoyed it! it was almost like a skins/euphoria but imbued with like a heartstopper/sex education vibe in the sense that it dealt with serious teenage issues/mental health but light enough that it doesn't weigh down on you. my character thoughts:

mia was so infuriating almost at all times. obviously under the circumstances, it makes sense but there's this level of likeability that was missing for me. maybe it was the writing or the acting who knows but in my mind it's like this: im making an albeit an unfair comparison to effy from skins or even rue from euphoria, but they were battling their demons and making all the wrong choices but there was still this level of “i want to root for them” that's missing with mia personally.

in a similar vein with alison, she is meant to be this popular rich mean girl archetype who surprises you but obviously in the first half of the season she's supposed to be kind of unlikeable but i found her very endearing. as for the relationship, alison and mia DO NOT belong together. like at all. i am not rooting for them. alison in a way forced a relationship with mia and then also mia was like too scared to say anything about it. its clear that alison liked mia waaaaay more than mia liked alison. like carli says in the last ep as well, “to learn to not be a fantasy to each other”, alison needs to take mia off this pedastal she has for her. i'm very interested to learn more about her character outside of mia though if they hopefully continue the show. i have a feeling that we are supposed to think that she and cameron hooked up at the end or something but i'm rlly hoping its a red herring.

carli is also a character i would love to learn more about. she definitely has more chemistry with mia and i love her for standing her ground against mia, as she needs to help herself before she can be in a healthy relationship. but i will say it was pretty shitty stringing cameron along.

speaking of cameron, i didn't quite expect to like his character as much as i did. in a way his arc in the season is battling toxic masculinity as he kinda seems to come off as this laid back, bro kinda guy but he cares and loves so deeply. it wasn't right calling bec a "sket". i'm not british but obviously its like equivalent to slut, and im very glad he owned up to it. i'm also really interested to know more about his family and stuff.

i love bec as well. she deserves all the happiness in the world. im glad she was able to air out her things with mia, albeit in a very treacherous way and i also love how her mom was supportive of the abortion. i'm honestly kinda tired seeing the mom kicking out the daughter for getting pregnant trope so it was nice to see a mom just being supportive. bec is just such a wonderful friend and mia honestly has a lot to make up for. re not telling mia about her and cam, it was honestly frustrating seeing mia be so petty. i understand that its a big secret and she felt like everyone was hiding things from her but its also right to have secrets amongst friends, idk that really stuck out to me.

will for me had the weakest arc as in it wasn't the most interesting to me. don't get me wrong, i love the character but it just wasnt giving a whole lot to me. i recognize him as more than the comic relief but also at the same time he was stirring the pot in a lot of the arguments / blowups the group had, consciously and unconsciously. though i will say will x theo <3 but comedic duo of the century is will x alison. the little song they did for mia's birthday is stuck in my head.

tldr; great characters and great show. it's really hard to find a show about teens as a 25yo living in a 16yo body that i enjoy and don't find annoying. i just love how each character was able to be so nuanced despite being an ensemble cast.

but knowing netflix's track record it's gonna get cancelled because a) it's good b) has wlw content... but i really hope not.

[mortuary-maggots]

HIYA SO THIS IS KASPER (ik its spelled diff in the pics i only changed it recently :sob:) he's my creepypasta oc :D usually he wears like average blue jeans and a brown/green shtriped turtleneck like in the last image kinda ? and green converse with like beads or drawings on them :D personality: Hates physical contact unless he initiates or very much trusts you, in which case he's always finding little ways to have contact; brushing their hand, tail wrapped around their wrist, hand on shoulder, bumping shoulders, ect. he cant get enough of it. Also just generally dislikes people (that he doesnt know/isnt comfy with) but can mask his hate pretty well and gives respect (with a side of sarcasm) where respect is due. Harsh and truthful, will not be afraid to get in your face and tell you how shit is as he sees it or just straight up insult you. If he's chill with you, he'll be pretty playful or sarcastic but can be ticked off or triggered somewhat easily. When he's on his own he's usually pretty relaxed and creative, a lot less prickly than when he's around people. he's pretty energetic and a bit of a trickster, a huge fan of pranks, he's a sarcasm lord and honestly pretty fun to be around if you can match his energy and keep up with his quips and jokes. if not, you're bound to get tired of him quick. he CAN be serious, but mostly only if he's in a fight and losing or if he's pissed off about something, in which he tends to lash out and say literally whatever he's thinking, be it brutal honesty about how he feels in the moment, how he thinks of someone or just random phrases and words that fly across his mind. any other time would be if he was comforting someone, in which case he turns into a big ole lovebug and does whatever he can to make them feel better. despite being such a yapper all the time he's a great listener too, and gives some pretty solid advice when he can. he canonically has a whole slew of issues including ptsd, anxiety, depression, autism, AND derealization/dissociation, coupled along with experiencing hallucinations, which is part of the reason that before he joined the mansion he was extremely wary of slenderman, less so because he was SLENDERMAN but moreso because he thought he was simply another hallucination. his backstory is located here , and while i need to adjust the writing bc i did it when i was like half sleep deprived its still accurate to his character. he is a cannibal and experiences blackouts if he goes too long without feeding, which send him into a basically unreachable state of rage and hunger. he's.. basically decimated a town or two thanks to this, because when he first realised he had to eat human meat to sustain himself he really didnt want to all that much and tried to avoid it until he realised just how dangerous that was. ANYWAYS YEAH i hope this wasnt too much to read and I HOPE YOU LIKE HIM i made him like right after i joined the fandom and hes probably not all that great in the grand scheme of things but i like him and hes my son and resides in a snowglobe where i shake him around for fun sometimes THATS ALL I HOPE UR DAYS GOING SUPER GOOD

I hope I did him justice!!!

[fairytaehl]

lgief rewatch ep. 1

okay so i wasnt able to stop myself from immediately discussing ep 4 here and ep 5 here and here because the festival is my favorite part of the show.

but ill now be starting from the beginning because i love this show and wanna discuss my personal favorite moments from the episodes!! im not much of an analyzer but i may say a few things here and there...

ep 1 / ep 2 / ep 3 / ep 4 pre-festival / ep 4 festival / ep 5, 5 part 2 / ep 6 / ep 7 / ep 8 / ep 9 / ep 10

where do i begin?! skipping past the first part where we're introduced to miaomiao and the her being struck by lightning and all (which was hilarious) let's get into how CUTE she was waving hi to fuyi!!! i fell in love with her smile asap (as someone who never saw esther yu before.)

what's extra hilarious is the cheering scene, and ill bring this point up again later, but the way she GOES for it, arms linked and all... oh, shes a drinker. in the real world, shes definitely able to outdrink someone.

and i just wanna say they made yao look SO cool on her entry!!! i love her weapon, shes so sick. what a scene!

the fight scene is neither here nor there for me, except for the fact that i felt like the glass pieces kept getting further away and then closer when required, LOL. the continuity was not there. love how ziqi comes in like goku, and never does it again in the series (i dont think?) amazing work. but he looks so hot stalking up to the mirror demon, uncaring about her threats. how'd they get out? what happened to them after that big fire blast? who knows. theyre fine. but heres the first shot of our ziqi being overprotective of yao!! goooood the sister dependency is such a character flaw for you my baby.

rolling his eyes at fuyi being so righteous, and then... dont touch my a'jie. the way his hair is blowing in this scene is phenomenal. credit to the fan making him even more gorgeous while all he's doing is staring at his sister. (ding yuxi has no bad angles and a handsome face coupled with amazing acting skills and weirdly great at intense staring.)

bombastic side eye.

but really appreciate the way we have scenes of how the novel went, seeing esther portray the serious and selfish lin yu is a nice look and so different from how miaomiao is. i didnt read the novel, not that i imagine the drama would follow the same plot, but i wonder how long the demon catchers had been with her for ziqi to see lin yu the way he does.

and, i love how miaomiao visibly shakes after remembering the way the marriage goes between lin yu and mu sheng in the book. girl, id be feeling just as shaken up.

ahhh glaring at her because she touched your sister and you think she has malicious intentions.

can i just say fuyi looks absolutely gorgeous here... literally handsome. breathtaking. i love the little detail with the cloth? streamers? folded over in his hair.

and lmaooooo again, cant let her rest, just have to let her know you do not like her.

im crrrryinggggg. "a'jie, are you okay?" / "i'm fine." "but i'm not :(((((" hes such a baby! yao scolding him is too funny. he obviously wants her attention, still so used to being treated as her precious little brother, but she draws her lines when he starts throwing tantrums. im not including it, but the line where he's dissing fuyi and goes as far as to say, "he even found a woman to marry" as if it wasn't for the purpose of capturing the demon!!! oh ziqi logic fails you when youre angry.

same, miaomiao...

god, this is so funny. you can tell how shes like in the real world. total fangirl and shipper, its beautiful. shes really one of us. also, youre not the supporting lead actress anymore! this is officially your novel, you just dont realize it yet.

love to again, see ziqi give her a look, cause thats all he can do when his a'jie is already berating him.

reblogged version with extra comments here