#IT FEELS SO GOOD TO WRITE FLUFF AGAIN
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planymphia wives honeymoon cutesy fluffy and overwhelmingly emotional drabble pleaseee
take my hand (take my whole life, too)
or: itâs their first week of being married - jane canât stop referring to nymphia as âmy wifeâ, nymphia canât stop crying, and no one has ever been more in love in all of time.
Jane wakes up when Nymphia rolls over and flings a heavy arm across her torso in sleep.
Janeâs eyes flutter. Sunlight threatens to spill in from the other side of the heavy hotel room curtains all too soon. Sheâs only half conscious, and her eyes are still a little blurry with last nightâs wine, and sheâs content to drift back off to sleep, lulled by the gentle brush of Nymphiaâs fingertips down her sternum, but then-
A little gasp, a sharp intake of breath. âOh my god.â
âMmwhat?â Nymphia mumbles, her eyes still closed as Jane grabs for her hand. Again, when her wrist is nearly pulled from the rest of her arm. âWhat?â
âNymphia,â Jane whispers, but itâs thin, because sheâs smiling. Nymphia can barely make it out through the dim light of the room and the sleep that clouds her vision, but she knows it just the same. She would recognize that smile by the sound of Janeâs words spoken through it, by the feeling of her soft gaze upon her. She would know it anywhere - even in the dark.
âWe got married.â
Nymphiaâs eyes blink open and look over at Jane. Sheâs on her back, holding Nymphiaâs hand up to the light. She turns it over carefully, fingertips against her open palm, thumb tracing over the silver band on Nymphiaâs ring finger. A diamond glitters in the dark.
âI know,â Nymphia grumbles, still half-asleep, still unwilling to be awoken for anything at all. âSpent eight months planning it, âmember?â
It was longer than that. It was the culmination of years of dreaming and months of planning, of Nymphia ironing out every last detail, Jane somehow even more stressed than she was, because sheâd wanted it all to be perfect. For her.
(âYou have a say, too,â Nymphia had reminded her on more than one occasion. âThis day is about the both of us.â
âI know, baby,â Jane said, that spot between her brows that creases when she thinks too hard momentarily relaxing as she kisses Nymphiaâs cheek. âBut itâs really about you. Everything is about you.â)
Jane pulls Nymphiaâs hand closer, studies it for a long while. Nymphiaâs eyes are just closing again when Jane presses a kiss to her ring finger, then to her palm, more kisses up the inside of her wrist, the length of her arm, up her shoulder. Nymphia whines.
It comes back to her slowly as Jane coaxes her from her sleep, the only one sheâd ever allow. Their night. It was everything they ever could have asked for, more than that. Their friends lining the aisle, swearing that they knew this day would come, arguing over who had really called it first. Jane, who had sworn she wouldnât cry, who had warned Nymphia not to be worried if she didnât, dissolving into tears the moment Nymphia emerged in all white. Nymphia, unsurprisingly to everyone, openly sobbing for half of the night, dabbing a tissue underneath her damp eyes at the dinner table. Theyâd had two glasses of champagne each, and nothing else. Theyâd promised, because they wanted to remember this: the toasts, the dancing, each other, every moment.
Nymphia is beaming by the time Jane kisses her shoulder blade, eliciting a hum.
âWas it everything you wanted?â Jane murmurs, brushing a dark strand of hair back to kiss Nymphiaâs ear.
A smile splits through Nymphiaâs sleep, eyes still closed as she nuzzles deeper into the pillow, deeper into Jane. âIt was perfect.â
Jane kisses Nymphiaâs cheek. âWhat was your favorite part?â
âMmm,â Nymphia hums, because how could she ever pick just one shining moment to stand out among the rest? How could she even begin to split the single most incandescent day of her life into segments?Â
âThe part where we went home,â Nymphia says, and Jane is pulling her closer. âThe part where we went to bed and you let me sleep in.â
âCanât let you sleep in,â Jane says, chin coming to rest on the crown of Nymphiaâs head where it comes to press against her chest. âToo in love with you.â
Theyâre both quiet for a moment, basking in the warmth of last night as it rolls over to this morning.
âWanna know my favorite part?â Jane asks, and Nymphia can feel the soft reverberation of her voice through her skin. âThe part where we wake up and I get to say that youâre my wife.â
Nymphia canât help but laugh at the sentiment. âThis part?â she says, finally tilting her head up to look at Jane. Sheâs never gotten used to this - Jane looking at her every day like sheâs still shiny and new. She doesnât think she ever will.Â
âYeah. This part,â Jane beams, one hand coming to cradle Nymphiaâs cheek as she smiles. âYouâre my wife.â
âThis partâs pretty good,â Nymphia stares into Jane, belly burning with butterflies, a love bigger and brighter than she ever thought was possible. âSay it again.â
Jane grins and brings her lips to Nymphiaâs, kisses her with a lifetime of devotion. She pulls away, and thereâs forever in her eyes.Â
âYouâre my wife,â Jane smiles. âAnd Iâm yours.â
-
Jane doesnât travel well.
She puts her packing off until the last possible minute and grumbles all the way to the airport. Nymphia canât be upset though, because Jane âmy wifeâsâ Nymphia at every possible opportunity - she does it to the disgruntled employee who checks their bags, and the TSA agent who checks their passports, and the barista who makes their coffees while theyâre killing time at their terminal. Nymphia rolls her eyes every time, but sheâs smiling too, and canât stop examining the sparkle on her left hand ring finger.Â
Jane goes so anxious on the plane that Nymphia has to hold her hand through the takeoff. She doesnât let go until thirty minutes into the flight, when Jane is finally distracted enough to drop her shoulders and stop thinking about the miniscule possibility that they go plummeting to the ground.
Eventually, they settle in. Itâs a long flight, nearly twenty hours, and they shelled out on first class for the occasion. Nymphiaâs got the window seat (partly because Jane knows she likes to look out the window, and partly because she canât stomach seeing the ocean several thousand feet beneath them), and Jane wastes no time getting comfortable.Â
(âItâs for my wife,â Jane tells the stewardess when she requests an extra blanket. âShe runs cold.âÂ
Nymphia stares up from her book just long enough to swat Janeâs arm, muttering âthatâs not even true.â
âI know,â Jane shrugs. âJust wanted to see what playing the wife card could get me.â
âCareful,â Nymphia warns. âYouâre gonna wear it out.â
âWhat, calling you my wife?â Jane grins. âBaby, thatâs never gonna get old.â)
Theyâre curled up together, alternating between books and movies and laughing at odd little happenings around them. Jane scoffs at shitty jokes on the screen, and Nymphia leans over to read her passages from her book, and Jane hums like sheâs listening, but really sheâs just admiring Nymphia in her comfy clothes, dark hair pulled back, glasses sliding down the bridge of her nose. She likes her the best like this.
At the end of her movie, Jane glances over at Nymphia. âAre you excited?â
She thinks she knows what the answer will be, but sheâs asking anyway, because she wants it to be perfect - their honeymoon, their first trip together as a married couple, their first foray into the rest of their lives together. Theyâd debated on a destination for weeks on end. Theyâd considered a roadtrip across America (too pedestrian - theyâll save that one for another summer), or a week in Vegas where theyâd get married again in some cheap chapel (too cliche - theyâll save it for their vow renewals). Theyâd debated on whether or not to book a room in the most luxurious resort they could find in Thailand, but had settled on a cozy beachside bungalow instead. Jane thought Nymphia would like that the best, knew she would too, because sheâd be happy if Nymphia was.
Itâs funny how someone can change you so completely and entirely, how they can bring out the best part of you that was waiting to be discovered. Before Nymphia, Jane had always put herself first, even at the expense of others. She was content like that, and then she met Nymphia, and the center of her universe shifted outside of herself. For the first time it wasnât a chore to care for someone else, and Jane was better because of it.Â
âFor the honeymoon?â Nymphia asks, folding her book in her lap. She looks down at Jane all nestled in her blankets, hoodie pulled over her blonde hair, and canât help but smile.Â
Nymphia had always been a hopeless romantic, all too eager to hand her heart over to the wrong person. She was a tender thing then, bruising easily in careless hands, burning through her own wells of hope faster than she could replenish them, and after the almost-great-loves of her young adulthood, she felt like sheâd been cored. Having her heart handed back to her so unrequitedly time after time, sheâd thought sheâd been selfish to want a love as big as her own, to expect anyone to be able to return what she gave to them. Sheâd stopped dreaming of it altogether, and then sheâd met Jane. Jane, who reveres her like the Earth reveres the Sun, who worships the ground that she walks on, who straightened out every desire Nymphia had crumpled up inside of herself and gave her more than she could ever dare ask for.Â
Now, Nymphia knows she can be selfish. She looks over at Jane and thinks that she wants this for all time - all of Jane, all to herself.Â
âYeah, baby. Iâm so excited.â Nymphia reaches over to take Janeâs hand. âJusâ wanna spend time with you.â
âGood,â Jane smiles, âme too.â She tilts her head up, puckers her lips in a silent request for a kiss, and Nymphia obliges.
-
The plane starts its descent several long hours after theyâve woken up, and Nymphia is grabbing Janeâs hand before she even has to ask, because she knows she hates this part the most. Jane sucks air through her teeth as the last bit of turbulence rocks the plane, and Nymphia rubs her thumb in soothing circles over the back of her hand. As soon as they hit the tarmac, Jane snaps back into place, blocking the whole aisle just to get Nymphiaâs carry-on out of the overhead compartment.
âSorry,â Jane says over her shoulder to a disgruntled passenger. âMy wife. Sheâs pregnant.â
âJane,â Nymphia hisses through her teeth. âYou of all people should know Iâm not pregnant.â
âNot yet,â Jane kisses her shoulder before they maneuver down the aisle. âBut when Iâm through with youâŠâ
Nymphia scoffs, smiling into the air, because she knows itâs impossible, but if anyoneâs love could defy the laws of science, it would be theirs.
-
Despite their sleep on the plane, Jane and Nymphia are so impossibly jetlagged, and the car ride to the bungalow is a delirious haze. Determined to push through the rest of the day, they tumble out of their room and onto the tree-lined streets, perusing the local offerings and getting dinner while they speak to each other in exhausted, two-word sentences that wouldnât make sense to anyone else. Itâs all they need.
And then theyâre out under the sky, wandering in this beautiful place with blue-green water that laps in whispering waves over the sandy beach, and Nymphia has never looked so beautiful to Jane as she does under the moonlight.Â
Sheâs running up the beach, shrieking as the water splashes at her feet, or when Jane chases her up the shore and catches her, spinning her around and pressing crazed kisses against her hairline. Nymphia is laughing, and then her cheeks are wet with tears, and Jane is wiping underneath her eyes.
âHey,â Jane says, pushing Nymphiaâs hair behind her ears, a careful concern crossing her face. âWhy tears?â
âIâm just so happy,â Nymphia blubbers, smiling through the silver-wet stars in her eyes, because itâs all been such a beautiful blur, and it hasnât hit her until right now that this is the rest of her life. âI canât believe we get to do this forever.â
âGod, youâre unbelievable, you know that?â Jane smiles. âHere I was thinking you stepped on a sea urchin. Or you got stung by a jellyfish. And Iâd have to pee on your leg or something. Wouldnât that be a great start to our honeymoon?â
âShut up,â Nymphia sobs. âYouâre ruining the moment!â
âMâsorry, my love,â Jane coos, wiping another tear from Nymphiaâs face. âYouâre the most sentimental girl alive, you know I canât keep up with that.â
Nymphia just laughs, because yes, sheâs endlessly sentimental, but, secretly, so is Jane. She still remembers the first time sheâd opened a card from Jane and was met with pages filled almost entirely with ink, letters squished together to make room for as many as possible, words winding around whatever tacky quote was stamped in the middle. Jane had a way with words, despite whatever sheâd tell you otherwise, and never ceased to amaze Nymphia with the sincerity she seemed to save just for her.Â
(It crosses Nymphiaâs mind then what her favorite part of the wedding really was - when Jane had recited her vows from memory in front of all their family and friends, had taken those impossibly beautiful things that were usually relinquished to their most intimate moments and had loved Nymphia enough to profess it in front of everyone. Not that they didnât know already. You canât hide a love as enormous as this one.)
âYou keep up just fine,â Nymphia says softly, resting her cheek against Janeâs hand. She swears Janeâs eyes go misty just before she kisses her right there on the sand, beneath the stars, beneath the universe that brought them together.
-
Nymphia smiles when Jane crawls into bed. Sheâs in a gray crewneck thatâs cut across her shoulders, and sheâs propped up against fluffy pillows, and Jane is pushing the book out of her hands.
âDinner was perfect,â Jane kisses her cheek before slipping into bed beside Nymphia. âBut is it bad that I just wanted to get back to the room?â
âItâs terrible,â Nymphia turns over, slotting her back against Janeâs chest. âIs this the part where we get old and boring?â
âYes,â Jane envelops Nymphia in her hold, fits against her in the way theyâre going to for the rest of their lives, slides a hand down the length of her torso and up the inside of her thigh.Â
âNot even gonna call you a whore or anything,â Jane kisses her ear. One hand cups Nymphiaâs breast, the other dips between her legs. âJust gonna fuck you good and tell you how much I love you.â
âSo boring,â Nymphia sighs, already melting away.
âSo boring.â
(Itâs not boring at all.)
-
Now that itâs hit Nymphia, she canât stop crying every time the sheer enormity of it washes over her.
Sheâs always been emotional, but sometimes thereâs a delay. Her life moves so fast, always swept up in the current of whatever dream sheâs chasing, and sometimes it isnât until she has a second to slow down that she realizes just how special every fleeting moment has been.
Itâs been a whole week of being married, of wandering through villages and long hikes up mountain sides and afternoons spent sunning on the shore, of dawns and dinners and keeping a distance from the rest of the world as they know it. Now, Nymphia is sitting in a hammock at the edge of the beach, and sheâs looking out over the water, and sheâs basking in the overwhelming perfection of this moment. Itâs something out of a dream, the sort of thing sheâd long thought would be impossible for her to experience, and she canât help but want to slow it all down, to draw out every precious moment long enough to memorize them, to make them last forever.
Sheâs sniffling just a bit when Jane finally finds her. She slides into place beside her, knees tucked into her chest, and stares quietly at the last of the sun as it sets over the ocean.
âBeautiful,â Jane murmurs, and itâs about the sunset, but itâs about Nymphia too. She presses a soft kiss to Nymphiaâs shoulder.
âI donât want it to end,â Nymphia sighs, unwilling to look away from the heaven thatâs in front of her. They still have another day of this, one more perfect day at the edge of reality, and then theyâll be packing their things, leaving the quiet paradise of their bungalow and flying home. Back to work, back to their crazy, stupid friends, back to the never-ending rush and whirr of the city.
Itâs not just that Nymphia doesnât want the honeymoon to end. She doesnât want this to end: her and Jane, so head-spinningly in love that nothing else matters, so finely attuned to one another, so freshly devoted to making it last. Nymphia wants so desperately to do it right, for their love to outlive that of either of their parents, for them to see all of their promises through for years to come. The possibility that they canât pull it off is mind-numbingly terrifying, but the possibility that they canâŠ
Itâs an impossible promise to make to one another, and yet theyâve already done it.Â
Nymphia sighs, mind swirling, and Jane somehow knows exactly what she means when she says, âwhat do we do now?â
Jane goes quiet for a moment, staring out over everything sheâs ever wanted, and does her best to be brave for Nymphia.
âWe sit out here until weâre too tired to keep our eyes open, and then Iâll take you to bed,â Jane says softly. âAnd then we have one more beautiful day, okay?â
âOkay,â Nymphia says, chewing on her cheek, still unable to look away from the landscape should it all disappear on her. âAnd then what?â
âAnd then we go home,â Jane looks over at Nymphia. âWe go back to our house. And Iâll take you to work every morning, and then Iâll come home and be pissed about something, probably, and youâll roll your eyes and tell me to shut up and I will, because I love you and, yâknow, I generally think youâre right about everything. And weâll have our stupid friends over and show them a billion pictures from our trip and kick them out so we can watch Project Runway and fuck. How does that sound?â
Nymphia giggles, and when she finally tears her gaze away from the beach, she realizes thereâs another heaven right beside her, one that she gets to take home. And home, their home, the one with the fat cat and the mismatched furniture and their pictures all over the wall, that's another heaven too. Suddenly, the trip being over doesnât seem like such a bad thing. Nymphia is almost looking forward to it.
âAre you scared?â Jane ventures softly, searching Nymphiaâs face carefully. âItâs okay if you are.â
âOnly a little,â Nymphia mumbles, voice wavering, eyes watering.Â
âIâm a little scared too. Weâll take it one day at a time, okay?â Jane continues, looking a little smaller all of a sudden, pushing through every worry that threatens to override her strong front. âI know weâll have bad days too, Nymph. I know Iâm gonna fuck up and not listen enough and piss you off sometimes, but I love you to fucking pieces. Iâm gonna give you the best Iâve got, I promise you.â
Nymphia takes Janeâs hand, and there are silent tears streaming down her face, because itâs only been a week and she already loves Jane more than she did on the day that she married her. Itâs enough love to override everything that threatens to pierce through their perfect bubble, enough to fuel the years to come, enough to roll over into the next life and the one after that.
âAnd if you get sick of me,â Jane teases, squeezing Nymphiaâs hand. âYâknow. Just say the word.â
âShut up. Iâll never get sick of you,â Nymphia cries, throwing her arms around Janeâs shoulders. Jane laughs into her neck, pulls her closer into a bone-crushing embrace. This is the best part - Nymphia married her best friend. Itâs enough just to hold her, just to be beside her. All those other parts, the sex and the sweet nothings and the swearing each other to forever, theyâre just the luxuries of being in love with her.Â
âYou promise?â Jane says into Nymphiaâs hair. She knows what the answer will be. She just wants to hear it anyway.
âI promise,â Nymphia whispers. âI love you.â
âI love you,â Jane says. âWith all my heart.â
(They go home two mornings later, back to the city and their couch and their cat, and they arenât scared anymore, because the warm glow of one another lasts much longer than fleeting sunsets over foreign shores. They wake up together, kiss goodbye on the way to work, hang their wedding photos on the wall and muse over the best day of their lives for years to come. They have lots of good days, and a few bad ones, too. They fight, and then they talk, and they never go to bed angry, just put each other back together in the way that only they can. And then they wake up and love each other more in spite of it.
The honeymoon was great, but hereâs the best part: they make it last.)
#IT FEELS SO GOOD TO WRITE FLUFF AGAIN#AGHHGHGH#thank you so much to anon for this prompt. i had so much fun with it fr#ALSO i am in the process of editing my previous prompts and moving them over to ao3⊠so this will be there soon#but for now it lives here <3#i know its a weird time in this particular community so if youâre reading#thank you so much :â)#these r my dolls and i love them dearly#and shoutout to HGS for being so wonderful and so muse all the time#as always this is for u#she writes#planymphia#prompt
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i think taking a break from writing smut for like almost a year has been rly refreshing bc i think it made me stop questioning if my writing is interesting without sex and just write it how i want. and then tbh a part of me has realized i like writing without the sex half the time. itâs nice. itâs fun to explore intimacy in as many non sexual ways as you can
#not that i donât like writing smut#bc tbh sometimes u just have to write gojo cumming#to feel fulfilled#but#yeah idk#dipping my toes back into sm.ut has been a journey#bc on one hand i actually didnât like it at all when i started writing it again#i was like bro how did i write this so often#this sucks ass i will go back to sfw fluff cuteness#but then i slowly got back into the swing of things#and now itâs like#ok yeah i did miss this a bit#but i think if anything#the break was good for me it made me#overall more confident in my writing and itâs ability to compel / draw in an audience without sex appeal#but also just have more plot based development#which is why iâm so happy w that post canon geto fic#bc me of a year ago#could never fathom writing 10k words of no smut#yeah anyway ramble over#but that being said#ima till write pure filth for october LMAO
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Moments in bed with Levi are often filled with cuddles, kisses, and everything else. There are moments when the two of you are solely together. They're filled with laughter and love, everything either of you could ever want. They're moments of unity, of affection, of an evergrowing relationship. Moments like those are special.
Just as special are the other times spend in bed with Levi. The times where both of you are doing your own thing, simply next to one another. You are scrolling on your phone, and he is playing a game. Even though you both are doing something entirely different, the connection is there.
The way his head is leaned against your shoulder. The way your legs are somewhat entwined. The soft noises coming from either of your current interest. They create a comfortable atmosphere. A place where nothing is nor has to be said. A place to simply relish eachothers being.
These quiet moments create times where just being together is fulfilling enough. Being in proximity of eachother is what makes them good. You could do the same thing in your own space, away from everyone. But both of you chose the other. Both of you prefer being together over everything else. Even if it's for nothing special. Especially if its for nothing special.
#hey its 11.30 pm again!! time for my brain to make me write fluff =w=b#i just want to be close to him <3#being together without like. relationship stuff happening is. so. important.#i feel like that is whats happening most of the time people are together with their so#yet its so rarely explicitly talked about or romanticized.#when it really should be!!#its such a good way to spend time together while still being your own individual person.#=w=bb#anyway YAY levi <3#obey me#obey me leviathan#obey me fluff#sillyposting#obey me leviathan x reader#my work
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?
#iâm feeling inspired rn after finally finishing a fic thatâs going up tonight#and now i kinda wanna just writeâŠ. plotless fluff??#like i mean no plot whatsoever just trying to capture how utterly infatuated the two cubitos are#but iâve read so many fics like that which are utterly phenomenal and i donât wanna seem like iâm copying and mine wouldnât be as good#and i also wanna write many aus but i again donât wanna seem like im#copying anyone because there are phenomenal fics for every au i wanna write!#and i know nobody has claim or ownership over any trope or genre or anything#but some fics are worshipped (like in every fandom) and i never want to seem like iâm trying to⊠likeâŠ. dethrone the royalty that are these#longstanding popular fics if that makes sense???#im still kind of a newbie like iâve only been writing for this community since january#i know this is stupid btw do not feel like you need to respond#iâm just feeling like every idea i have rn is stepping on someone elseâs toes and taking their recognition away#which i know is stupid! but coming from a - i guess- toxic community before this one i always feel the need to overthink like this#anyway sorry if anyone read this far iâm having a mental battle with myself rn to get out of this mindset
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Oh oh....I got inspired again...đŒđ»đȘ¶đ
#bardic inspiration#why do I get bardic inspiration from others?#shouldn't i be the one to cast bardic inspiration over others?#but it is nice to receive it feels good :D#so i guess i am writing again.... ;)#romance fluff and angst to come!#bhaal battle beer bard speaking#bhaal battle beer bard#bhaal battle beer bard writing#first and foremost#importantly!#bg3#baldur's gate 3#astarion#saulus#saulus the bard#bard#bardcore#writers#writing#writers of tumblr#writers on tumblr
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ohmygodddddd i am a fucking genius...đïž the fic idea i just came up with. the Specific Line i thought up. its such a random idea but its so so cute and sweet and ugh its gonna plague me forever. kinda proud of myself to be honest so lets just hope i can Actually write it soonđ§
#mmm brain isnt always bad sometimes i guess.#its some unapologetic jake fluff btw#bc he deserves it#also i forgot i cant really spend time on tumblr today bc ill be busy again lol so tomorrow it is (hopefully)#but its gonna be a good day bc me and my bestie are going to see love lies bleeding And immaculate togetherđđ#and probably get some lunch and maybe ice cream too#excited#have been looking forward to today#and then after today im looking forward to finally crawling back into my little tumblr cave#hopefully i can Actually Read.#and yk. writing would be nice too.#also im goin back on sertraline today and apparently it can be used for ocd too so i will try to see if any of That feels different as well#raaaaaa#still havent fully researched ocd thođ§ive been procrastinatingđ§as i dođ§#anyways goodnight its 5am.#shouldnt have had that 8pm iced capp#i downed that shit fr#ok bye bye love yall#talkin shit#FUCK YES THIS POSTED LIKE ON THE VERY SECOND 5:15 WAS ENDING YESSS#sorry i actually like am distressed when the minute(s) of my posts arent posted on a 0 or 5 or like the same as the previous number#and when it is i feel like actual relief and joy#and when it isnt i contemplate deleting and waiting until the desired minute to post again.#anddd sometimes i actually do.#i also will just wait several minutes to post something when its not the exact minute i want yet#or ill queue it for like. literally a couple minutes in the future.#yeah i have many issues#okay gn thank you for reading if you readđ§đ«¶#i always either suck my own dick or beat my own ass.#rarely ever is there an in between
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An Animal in Bed
A short two scenes of some fluff and cuddles between Cyril and Adira, two soldiers with long and winding pasts, and an on-and-off relationship that has lasted for almost 4 decades. They are messes when it comes to one another. I love them so much.
CW // Nudity? Itâs not described in detail. But they sure as hell are nude. Some brief flirting and implied smut at the end as well!
Steam rolled from the bathroom door as Cyril nudged it open with a bare foot, dusky skin slipping from under the pale towel affixed at his waist.
Stretching, he gave a groan of satisfaction as he felt a pleasant grind in his spine and shoulders, tail similarly tugging backwards. The ache in his shoulder that had been bothering him all day had dulled.
Adira had enjoyed the water heâd warmed up for her a half hour ago, and now he in turn made note to thank her for cooling it down for him. Ice cold showers never failed to make him feel alive, relaxed. His specturgy would usually react at least a bit, however, resulting in clouds of steam never failing to fill the shower.
Slippers sliding across the hardwood floor, he hung his perfect military posture up along with his towel and walked to the bed, allowing his shoulders to sag, an absentminded wave dimming the candles that lit the room.
What woke both him, and Adira, was the moment he crashed on top of her, elbow connecting painfully with her lower back and causing the both of them to make some very un-professional noises.
âFuckingâŠâ The Alf began, before sighing, muttering something under her nose, turning over on top of the furs before looking the Jihn in the eye sleepily.
It was only the hot shower pronouncing her tiredness with her Alvish blood that stopped her from reacting more animatedly.
Instead, she simply said; âWhy?â
âYou- I thought-â He began, hoping his freckles werenât illuminated in the moonlight in embarrassment (They were.)
âYouâre usually in your other form around now. I was tired, and didnât bother to check, so, I⊠jumped. Onto you.â
If heâd been even a bit more tired, Cyril wouldnât have realized how stupid it sounded. Unfortunately the both of them had been shocked awake by the jolt of one full grown, fully nude, hardened soldier leaping onto the other and slamming together.
Adira blinked once, then smiled sluggishly at the other man, now kneeling, tail flitting around nervously, as she got up, bare scar, weight and muscle defined in the candle beside the bed.
âWeâre gonna talk about this tomorrow morning, you know that?â
âYes-â
âUntil then, letâs just get some fucking sleep. Sound good?â Cyril paused for a moment, closing his mouth and nodding.
âYeah.â
Adira gave a satisfied smile, before stretching slightly, the familiar growl beginning to build like an engine firing up in her chest, within a moment the bed filled with a giant mass of black, silver, gray and white fur, a pair of glowing yellow-blue eyes staring at him.
A massive, taloned hand reached from the mass before Cyril could move from where heâd stood at the foot of the bed. With ease, it picked him up and drew him into the cuddle, as the beast began to purr, and the two of them fell asleep.
âAll Iâm saying is, you need to let it relax. You havenât hurt me once in your sleep. If thereâs anyone I can trust you being around, and you can trust being around you, when youâre like that, itâs me, isnât it?â Cyril said, while they ate breakfast, adding between bites. âThanadeuss was able to control how much of it he let out. Youâre working up to that fine control, but in the meantime, this could work.â
âYou have a point.â She muttered, begrudgingly admitting to herself that it felt better after having spent the night in that form, the curse apparently satisfied. âDoesnât it bother you?â
âMaybe it doesnât.â He shrugged, giving a glance up at her and turning back to his food.
The Alf had known him long enough to know when he was hiding something, and longer still, to tell what it was he as hiding.
âSo youâre saying you like that form?â
âWould it surprise you all too much if I said it excited meâŠ?â
She stared at him, for a moment, eyes wide, before her gaze narrowed, a slight hint of yellow ringing her irises and a smile tugging the corners of her lips.
âIs that soâŠ?â
Her voice dove to a valley between a purr and a growl. It was all he needed to hear to know that the rest of the day would entail.
Hope you enjoyed! âš I ought to write some smut for them cause theyâre soooo fun to imagine but I havenât yet found the time and mood to do so properly, though I have a few scenarios in mind!
#fluff#writeblr#writers on tumblr#writing community#writing#circa specturgia#wip.circa specturgia#my writing#I promised a new scene and I want to make sure to start posting again especially since Iâve really picked this WIP back up#after a month and a half of total emptiness and a half month preceding that of slow stagnation#so this feels good
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hey sweetheart!
how're you? how're you doing?
just wanted to check in with you!
and also to let you know that i love your works!
your take on suguru is immaculate.
currently in love with your knight!suguru fic and your drunk!suguru fic! <3
hi anon !! wahhhhhh youâre so sweet for checking inâŠâŠ T_T iâm doing just fine !!!! hoping to get some writing done this week âŠ.. iâm gonna try my best!!
and !!!!! tysm for ur kind words :â3 it means a lot to me!! praise from sugu girlies (gn) always makes me so happy <3333 IâM OVERJOYED THAT U LIKE MY TAKE ON HIM itâs extremely self-indulgent but it is what it is yk âŠ.
and aaaa iâm very fond of both those fics :â3 i feel so warm knowing u like them too anon !!! iâve been writing sugu a lot lately hhh âŠ.. but i still have lots of wips left !!! i hope theyâll live up to ur sweet praise once theyâre out !!! đ»đ»đ»
#TYSM FOR THE SUPPORT :â3 MWAH MWAH#when it comes to sugu wips âŠâŠ#i have two for cult leader!geto .. one fluff and one angst âŠâŠ#then i have the wolf/hunter!sugu x little red riding hood!reader ficâŠâŠ.#and then i also have some random fluff drabbles/fics here n there !!#thereâs also âŠ. the single dad!sugu series that i dont think im writing anytime soon đđđ#âŠâŠâŠ.#the wipsâŠ. never endâŠâŠ..#sorry anon my craving to talk abt my wips ended up infecting this post </3 TYSM AGAIN!! this made me feel so warm :((#sending u many good vibes <333#ask tag â©
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ginger, cracking an eyelid and thinking about opening requests for a little bit? its more likely than you think đđ
#redacted asmr#i never say it in as many words but my askbox is almost always open đ„łđ„ł#to be honest i am rubbish at actually filling reqs so its probably not a good idea#im so fucking picky about what to write and the kinds of things that appeal to me#plus like....... most reqs that come in tend to be for things that im either not great at and/or dont particularly vibe with yk#its nobodys fault that writing david feels like pulling teeth its just the way it is you get me#hence why in my pinned it makes it clear that i take Suggestions rather than Requests#thing is i could do reqs or we could do like another ask game or smth#yeah another issue w me and reqs is that my little goblin brain just CANNOT stay on track and it fucks me up Every Time đđ#the prompt will be like 'uhhhh elliott sunshine beach day fluff uwu' and i will get 100 words in and#think 'wait what if they were actually dead/imprisoned/doomed the whole time that would be so fun' and then thats all i can write#i mean i started what was SUPPOSED to be DAMN crew cute halloween fluffy stuff and all of a sudden they're all dead so#not a great track record on my part#i cant stand a close plan there has to be room for improvisation#which is awkward when someone has asked for smth specific đ«Łđ«Ł#ginger rambles#oh also anon is off bc i am not putting up with any more ridiculous horseplay in my inbox no sir#fuck around in my askbox and..... actually don't find out bc surprise! i deleted it already sorry who are you again
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tentatively opening a google doc from september 2021 with the beginning of the third instalment of we are bound together by delicate stems...
#having a problem of i want to write new merwaincelot universes but i don't want them to all feel the same#which is stupid bc they're all written by me so there's bound to be some similarity#essentially i like bandit gwaine but i'm starting to run out of twists to put on it that make it slightly more interesting#and i want to keep writing bandit gwaine#but don't really want a proper au bc one of those is ongoing so i'm making a bit of a pickle for myself#and wanting to write fluff for this universe but in my head gwaine is still traumatised from marigolds so that needs addressing first#anyway#see what sticks#it's all good#just wanting to write a ship but having no situation to write them in is very frustrating#perhaps i should start taking prompts again hmmmmmm#ignore the lil tag ramble just needed to figure stuff out by talking to myself#lit talks
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Iâm to punch your writing bad vibes so get your butt ready.
To be slightly personal, your writing has been one of my inspirations for a while now. If I had to describe your style, it doesnât dip into overly flowery purple prose that makes it difficult to tell what is going on, but it's meaty enough to put me into a characterâs shoes and really give me a sense for the emotions they feel and why they feel that way. Little details like usage of punctuation, bolds, italics, caps, etc. truly sell your muses as their own person, complete with distinct voices. These little things may go unnoticed, but to me, Itâs the little things like these that really show how much care and effort you put into your writing.
And generally, it really gives me motivation to sit down and write, whether itâs for a reply or something personal.
Your writing is very satisfying to read, and I know Iâve said it multiple times before, but it has truly opened my eyes to characters I would have normally been apprehensive or understood little about if not for you. Thereâs something about how you write P5 related content that makes me wish you were in charge of the game. You really hit all the things I enjoy about the game and seamlessly incorporate it to your writing, as well as improve its shortcomings.
(To be slightly personal again, your enthusiasm for this game, through IC content or OOC posts, is one of the reasons why Iâve been able to slowly come up with ideas on how to slap my P4 muses into P5, but more importantly, enjoy the game for what it is. Without you, I have no doubts that it would have taken me much longer to appreciate it.)
Of course, your writing achieving this effect would not be possible without your understanding of the game, its themes and its characters. Not just P5, mind you. P4, too. Despite me knowing the events of the game almost by heart, you always bring up something fresh about it that makes me view it in a new light and keep the P4 era going in my heart, and by P4 era, I mostly mean Naoto.
I know youâll make me fall in love with P3 all over again soon, so Iâm looking forward to that :^)
There is a lot more for me to say, you being a cherished friend is one of them, and also that you are a horrible little gremlin for encouraging my illness known as Naoto Disease, just to name a few things, but thatâs for a later date, since I donât want to make this ask stretch on for miles.
PS remember that I wonât stop loving you dani-lion xoxo
((You are a damn good, genuine friend, Liz. I needed to hear this.))
#out of cards#mun stuff#chibitantei#long post#((....I really have nothing I can say to this#there have been times recently where I get too into my head about my blogs here and whether or not my writing has been bland or boring#and I let it get to me...which then kills my motivation to write anything#whether it's long form or something short#I don't feel like I'm portraying their voice the way they want me to or I'm doing a horrible job characterizing them#it's an internal struggle because then I have my logical side start fighting this emotional side#I know it's just me letting my thoughts get to me but man...it tires me out when I'm fighting with myself#this is a hobby and it's supposed to be fun; that's what I remember at the end of it all#I think I just let my perfectionist side get to me sometimes because there's a lot of amazing writers here#and I feel like I have to keep up with them in order to be seen as a good writer#including you Liz#your writing style and characterization have been an inspiration to me as well; from the time I first delved into Persona RPC#I needed this...I really needed to hear this so thank you so much for punching the bad vibes and negativity#I know I put this all in tags but...thanks to anyone who happens to read all of these#we'll be back to the regularly scheduled shenanigans and fluff and angsty-riddled threads#but again thank you thank you THANK YOU Liz; you know I love you so so much as my friend and the friendship we have is so important to me#I won't let these writing bad vibes stick around <3))
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Been sticking both feet back into the angst pool lately with writing and it feels great
#I like fluff and it was needed the past couple months but Iâm at a place where I feel comfortable writing my favorite genre again#weâre getting to the second half of the Arcilla AU when Gus passes away and Ozzy moves on with Santino#and itâs so good đđđ#santino belongs to our friend maria and he is the besttt#also more inspiration to hop back into the precipice!!
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âguilty pleasureâ | 8.6k
worst!logan howlett x f!reader
SUMMARY: After saving Earth-10005 from impending disaster, Wade convinces Logan, the alcoholic and easily irritated mutant, to stick around for a while. Heâs convinced that nothing good can come out of this experience, until he meets you: the charming bartender with a soft spot for swearing that matches his own. Suddenly, sticking around doesnât seem so bad after all.
WARNINGS/TAGS: mdni - smut 18+ fluff. drinking. dirty talk. slow-burnish. grumpy!logan x sunshine!reader. reader is really kind but cracks a lot of jokes. age gap (25 vs 200 - theyâre basically the same age). oral sex (f receiving). fingering. finger sucking. soft dom!logan. wade being the funniest asshole. logan calls reader "kiddo/kidâ.
A/N: HI! first of all, i'd like to thank you for all the support you showed me on my recent post. let me just tell you that iâm LOVING writing for logan. but none of this would be possible without YOU, so yeah, i fucking love yâall.
** regarding this story, i was planning on making it even longer, but writing these two has been so much fun, and i didnât want it to end just like that (i have attachment issues as you may infer from this note). therefore, iâve made the decision to write a second part to this fic, which will contain fluff and other stuff (you already know the drill). i donât know when iâll be posting it, but iâm sure it wonât take me that long.
*** iâm also working on other one shots (purely fluff/domesticity because i want this man to cradle me in his arms). anyway, i donât know if anyoneâs going to read this, but still, all I have to say is THANK YOU FOR READING MY WORKS! i hope you really like this silly story i made up :)
**** english is not my first language so if you come across any mistakes donât hesitate to tell me :)
special recognition to @zloshy who allowed me to rant about my own fic đ the sweetest human ever
The bar is far from packed, but then again, it never truly is.
Studying your regulars has become your favorite hobby. Soon you end up knowing their names, the drinks they like, and what time they come through the door. Itâs what happens when standing on your own two feet and refilling glasses lose all their charm. A part of you thinks you also do it to make them feel safe. No matter how much you try to deny it, you truly care about their well-being.
Is this your dream job? Nope. Definitely not. Youâre pretty sure that holding some strangerâs hair while they empty their insides wasnât on your bingo card for this year. But sadly money doesnât grow on trees, and university isnât going to pay itself. Plus, this was the only job in which your resume was not immediately rejected. It should also be stressed that the drunks happen to love you.Â
Perhaps this isnât the life you had always imagined for yourself, but you were getting closer to it. Youâd often talk to Adam, a retired psychologist in his seventies. He was without a doubt one of the most loyal clients youâd ever encountered. In the past, heâd even given you free advice on some of your failed hookups. You once told him that in less than two years, youâd be just like him when you got your degree in Psychology. To your surprise, he replied: âYouâll be much better than me, doll. Iâm a mess, canât you see it? You donât wanna be like me,â his voice was hardly above a whisper as he continued. âI should be at my daughterâs birthday right now, but I didnât get an invitation this year. Believe me, you donât want to end up like this old man.âÂ
Like Adam, most of the men who frequented the bar day-to-day saw it as an opportunity to hide within the shadows. In comparison to the other pubs in the area, the one you work at doesnât receive that much attention from the general public. A dimly lit place where only music from the 80s is allowed. Youâre certain that if a health inspector ever came down here, youâd be in serious problems. But hey, you know what they say: do not worry about tomorrow; instead, live in the now.
The atmosphere of the bar shifts dramatically as the main door slams shut with a resounding thud, pulling you abruptly out of your daydreaming. You turn to see whoâs arrived, but as soon as your eyes meet his, youâre compelled to look away. Nevertheless, the brief glance you catch of the strangerâs features is enough for you to unlock your phone and send a quick text to your best friend.Â
You:
cutie patootie alert
thereâs this really handsome guy at the bar
i donât think iâve ever seen him before
i think iâm in love with him
my night just got a 100% better
Allison:
age
what does he look like
is he bald?
You:
he looks like he could be in his early fifties??? itâs hard to tell UGH i wish you were here
brown hair, beard, 6â2 if iâm not wrongÂ
i didnât stare at him for too long
otherwise that wouldâve been very weird
and no heâs not fucking bald
that happened only once and i was not aware of that gentlemanâs lack of hairÂ
Allison:
so youâre dating retired now
get it grandma!
You:
oh fuck you allisonÂ
Allison:Â
itâs okay girl we all have our flaws
just make sure itâs nobodyâs father
wait itâs not mine right?
You:
nah your dadâs way hotter donât you worry about it
Allison:
bitchÂ
Even with the music blasting through the speakers that are attached to the ceiling, you can still hear the low murmur and the whispers. The mysterious stranger seems to have attracted the attention of the other patrons, some of whom have even raised their phones to take photos. Your eyebrows draw together. Why would they do something like this, approaching the man as if he were a celebrity? Since curiosity never fails to kill the cat, you decide to get involved.
âDo I have somethinâ on my face?â you hear him ask the crowd, his raspy voice making your knees wobbly. He sounds enraged. You step on your tiptoes, trying to see what all the fuss is about, albeit itâs pretty hard considering how these men are caging him with their bodies.
The glow of a phoneâs flashlight catches your attention, and suddenly, a chair is dragged without much elegance. âEnough of that, yâhear me?â
Enter you now. âOkay, gentlemen, Iâm sorry. Iâm gonna need you to make some space for me, alright?â you mumble as you gently push them aside. âThank you, thank you. Yâall can be real sweethearts when you put your minds to it.â
Then you spot him, and it becomes clear why everyone is making such a fuss.Â
Gary, your worst client ever, steps forward. His nasty breath clouds your senses as he rests one of his sweaty hands on your shoulder. âDoll, itâs the fucking Wolverine. Donât ask him for a picture, though. He doesnât seem to be in the mood for that.â
The last thing you needed to see today was a fight (despite your knowledge of who would be the winner). You locate yourself amidst them, shaking your head like a disappointed mother, so as to add a tiny bit of drama to the situation.
âGuys, what youâre doing here is completely inappropriate. I thought Iâd taught you better. Imagine if I were to pull this crap on you. You wouldnât have it.â
Adam presses his lips together, flushing a bit. âShe does have a point.âÂ
âThank you, peanut. Youâre still my favorite,â you flash him an honest smile. Scrutinizing the rest of the men, you continue with your speech. âYou can still make up for it and fill my tip jar all the way to the top. Deal?â they all scoff, barking their disagreement. âOh, you donât like the sound of that? Then leave him alone, okay? Class dismissed! Back to your places,â you clap your hands repeatedly, signaling them to go away. âChop chop. All this alcohol wonât be drinking itself.â
Just like that, everything goes back to normal in the blink of an eye. Wolverine sits back down in his chair, leaning closer to the table and resting both elbows on it. He examines you, lifting his chin while his brown eyes take in every inch of you.
âThank you,â he utters, his eyes still trained on your features.Â
âNo need to. Itâs what Iâm here for,â you point to your work clothes, which consist of an antiqued apron and a silly sticker that has your name written on it. âCan I get you anything to drink? Itâs also Burger Night. You can get one for half the usual price.â
(No. Itâs not fucking Burger Night. You just happen to find yourself deeply attracted to him.)
He doesnât seem too eager to hear you talk. âNot hungry at the moment. But I could use some whiskey.â
âYou sure?â
âYeah, kid. Very sure.â Well, now he does look annoyed.
âGreat. Iâll be back in a minute,â you move as if you were in a race, returning to him after a hot minute. Setting his glass down on the table, you fill it with some old whiskey you donât even know the name of. Still, he omits that detail, gulping down two-fingers of whiskey as if it were water. âI see youâre thirsty.â
âCould you leave the bottle here?â those brown puppy eyes are begging you to do as he says, and although youâd be happy to oblige, rules are rules.Â
âActually, I canât. The bottle stays on the counter. But you can always join me at the front,â your proposal doesnât appear to have the desired effect on him. âI wonât talk to you if thatâs what you want.â
âIâll take your word for it,â he rubs his neck, drawing a long breath as he stands up.Â
You can feel many pairs of eyes searing into your soul. The others ask you for more drinks and you pour them, pricking up your ears when you hear them talking about him.
âWhat a weirdo. Didnât you see it on TV? Heâs not even from this universe,â Gary explains, looking for accomplices to hate on Wolverine. âLet me tell yâall something: he shouldnât even be here. Heâs fucking dead on this earth.â
Yeah⊠that you knew.
It had been all over the news for weeks. Some would even swear that he was back from the dead, but that was until the representatives from the TVA spoke their truth. If someone wouldâve told you a month ago that multiple universes were a thing, you wouldâve laughed in their face.
As if that werenât already difficult to process, your mind does the job of reminding you that thereâs a man with metal claws sitting a few meters away from you. Despite that, you canât seem to be scared of him. Thereâs something magnetic about his personality and that donât-come-near-me-or-there-will-be-consequences expression that he has. Why had you promised not to speak to him? Dammit.
âI can hear your thoughts,â a muscle in his jaw twitches after knocking back another glass of whiskey. He squeezes his eyes shut before tapping the table with two fingers, silently asking for a refill.
âI thought you didnât want me to talk,â you raise one of your eyebrows, and you behold how the corners of his mouth turn up for an instant. âI can assure you your liver hates you.â
âAlcohol wonât kill me, so donât be afraid. Keep âem coming.â
For nearly twenty minutes, he does nothing but drink. He attempts to light a cigar at some point, and you stop him. âYou canât smoke in here.â
âNo special treatment?â he inquires, placing the cigar between his parted lips and tilting his head back. Heâs so⊠dreamy. He has to know it.
âI saved your ass today. The least you can do is not cause me any trouble.â
His eyes widen at your words, blinking owlishly. âYou saved my what?â
âYour goddamn ass. You were about to start a fight.â
âBlame the idiots you have for clients,â he says, jerking his thumb toward your direction. âI was just mindinâ my own business. They came for me, not the other way around.â
âLook, Wolvie. Iââ
âWolvie?â giving a bitter laugh, he rams a hand through his hair. âThatâs the worst nickname Iâve heard in a long time,â he looks at you through his lashes, getting rid of his leather jacket. âItâs Logan.â
âWow. Your name is very boybandish.â
You succeed in making him laugh once again. Itâs the perfect opportunity for you to observe his face without feeling like you were just about to get caught. He has deep creases and worry lines etched between his eyebrows, a brown beard that perfectly frames his jaw, and a few white hairs scattered in his sideburns. Pearly teeth that go hand in hand with one of the most impeccable smiles youâve ever seen, and a pair of brown eyes that make you feel weak in the knees. You know for a fact that heâs a lot older than you; his exact age remains a mystery, but his appearance is enough for you to start fantasizing.
Shit, you want him. You should feel sickened by the mere thought of being with him. He was born God knows when, has lived hundreds of years. Still, the idea of tracing his cheekbones with your fingers while lying on his chest doesnât leave you. This is fucked up. You are fucked up. A fucked up Psychology student. The joke is pretty much self-explanatory.
âSo this is where youâve been hiding, you preening slut. Canât even bother to answer my calls now?â
The tension between you shatters like a glass dropped onto the floor. He doesnât dare to look in the direction of the owner of that voice, not even as the seat next to him gets taken. He pinches the bridge of his nose in frustration. âWade, what the hell are you doinâ here?â
âIt hasnât been exactly easy, raising our kid on my own. I donât even have money to hire a babysitter, Lo. I spent nine months carrying your child, and for what? You end up going after a bartender,â the masked man turns to you, giving a sly wink. âNo offense, baby. You must be a real sweetheart. In fact, do you want my number? The nameâs Wade, but you can call me whatever you like.â
âYou dumb fuck. Are you flirtinâ with her?â
âNo shit, smartass. Youâre the future of this country.â
A soft giggle escapes you despite your attempt to hold it back. You take a step back, admiring the two men. âWell, arenât you two a beautiful couple?â
âYou should see our little munchkin. Heâs got my eyes and Loganâs hair. His first word was gubernatorial.â
âWould you like to have a drink while youâre here?â
âA beer would be great. Thank you, sugarbear. Youâre the cutest,â Wade sinks back into his chair, resting his chin on his palm. He jerks his head in Loganâs direction, bumping his shoulder. âSheâs the cutest. Are you two together?â
Logan rubs his forehead, speaking through gritted teeth. âHow did you find me?â
âIt's the power of love, baby. I had Itâs All Coming Back To Me Now on repeat for hours. Couldnât stop thinking about you.â
Handing Wade a cold beer, your eyes scan Loganâs face. âI didnât know patience was your strongest suit.â
âMe neither.â
âEnough of that! I canât stand not being included in a conversation,â Wade throws his hands in the air, and you look at him. âThere you are. So, what about you? Are you even allowed to be here? Did bars change their policies?â
You canât help but snort. âIâm 25.â
Wade looms closer, lowering his voice. âNow that I think about it, you could totally be Loganâs caretaker. Heâs been having some issues recently, given his age. Do you⊠know anything about adult diapers?â
But then Loganâs face contorts, turning crimson. He rises from his seat, grabbing Wadeâs arm. âThatâs it. Weâre leavinâ,â his eyes lock on you for a moment. âHow much do I owe you?â
âDonât worry about it. Itâs on the house.â
The things youâre willing to do for a man, right? You should be ashamed of yourself.
(But you arenât.)
His mouth hangs open in disbelief. âKiddo, are youââ
âCompletely sure,â you finish his sentence for him, bowing your head and clasping your arms behind your body. A tight-lipped smile takes over you. âJust donât tell my boss.â
Wade shifts his gaze back and forth between Logan and you. âI usually donât mind third-wheeling, but I sort of feel left out.â
âIâm gonna sew your mouth shut, Wade.â
âOh, come on! I was just making small talk,â the masked man tries to excuse himself while Logan pushes him towards the door. âIt was a pleasure meeting you, sunshine. Iâm free on Thursdays. Hit me up if his whiskey dick fails to impress you! Mineâs way more agile and young!â
As you watch them leave the bar, you remain frozen in your place amidst the clamor of ongoing chatter and clinking glasses.
What the fuck had just happened?
âPatrickâs normally the first one to get wasted during weekends,â you explain to the blonde woman sitting in front of you, and she writes that information down in her notebook. âHe can usually handle himself, but at some point, heâll try to call his ex-wife, and thatâs when you know you need to stop serving him.â
She clicks her tongue, the color draining out of her face. âThis is⊠definitely a lot to remember. I think I already forgot half of what you said.â
You shake your head, shoving your hands in your pockets. âYouâll get used to it, believe me. Iâll be with you at all times, so if you have any doubts, just ask me.â
After a whole year of working solo at the bar, you finally get to have a coworker: Gwen, a mother of two teenagers in her forties. You had met her at the grocery store, and in the process of helping her find a specific brand of cookies, you found out that she had recently lost her job. One thing led to another, and now sheâs your trainee.
Your savior complex strikes again!
It has been four days since your first encounter with Logan. The thought that he could show up at any moment makes your heart race and your hands sweat. Allison had received countless voice messages where you narrated the entire experience in full detail.Â
Touching your arm softly, Gwenâs face lights up. âAnother man came in. Is he a regular? I donât think you told me about him.â
Fuck, itâs him. Manifesting does work wonders. He locks eyes with you and raises a hand in greeting.
âLeave this one to me,â you tell her as your feet take you to where Loganâs sitting, contemplating the way in which his leather jacket hugs his wide frame. âLong time no see.â
âHey, kid,â he grins. âWhatâs up?â
âNothing much. Nobody has puked yet, so thatâs a good thing,â you crinkle your nose, shifting your weight from one foot to the other. âWhiskey?â
âYou know me so well,â a smirk takes place in his lips, and he smiles cockily. âThough this time, I wonât be leavinâ without payinâ.â
âWeâll see about that,â you go back to your usual spot behind the counter, looking for a glass. Your cheeks kind of hurt from smiling so hard. Next to you, Gwen studies your reaction to seeing Logan. âIs that your boyfriend?â
You almost drop the whiskey bottle. âGod, no. Heâs not my boyfriend. Barely know the guy.â
âItâs funny,â she says, raising her eyebrows with a knowing look, as if she knows something you donât. âHe hasnât stopped looking at you since he arrived.â
âItâs probably because of this,â you reply, lifting the bottle in her direction before pouring a small amount into a glass. Just as youâre about to walk over to him, a girl slides into the sit beside him, her long blonde hair swept up in a ponytail. Sheâs wearing a stunning red dress and black heels. You wonder if sheâs a model, because she certainly looks like one.
Her hand creeps up his arm, fingernails scraping against the worn leather. Although Loganâs expression is hard to read, he doesnât even flinch.
âYou know what? Hereâs his drinkâ You take care of it. Iâll stay here,â you donât give Gwen a chance to talk back, instead staying behind the bar, engaging in small talk with other clients.Â
âDoll, are you okay?â Adam asks you after noticing you struggling to open a beer bottle. He takes it from your hands and opens it with ease. âThere you go.â
âThank you, Adam. Iâm fine, never been better. Why you ask?
âYou sure?â
âAffirmative.â
âYou mixed up our drinks,â he explains in his most psychologist-like voice. âThis never happens to you. Michael has my wine, and Iâve got his martini.â
âFuck! Iâm so sorry. I justâ I donât know whatâs wrong with me,â you chew on your bottom lip, rubbing your temples. âI feel stupid.â
âOh, please. Donât say that. Youâre far from being stupid,â he sits up straight, reaching for your fingers and giving them an apologetic squeeze. âIf you ask me, I think youâve got your mind on someone else,â he must notice how you visibly get tense because he adds: âRemember: I know when youâre lying. You didnât charge him the other day, which means that you must really like him,â taking a tentative sip of the martini he didnât even ordered, Adam shrugs. âIâm a great observer. Thatâs all.â
Out of the corner of your eye, you see the blonde girl from before returning to where her friends are chatting. Logan is left alone, and you watch him grab his glass and head towards the counter.
âAs I said, your mindâs somewhere else,â Adam sighs, a tiny smirk tugging at his lips. âGo get your man. Iâll survive.â
âNot my man. But thanks, older-and-wiser-version-of-cupid.â
Pretending not to have seen Logan, you continue with your work. He remains silent for some minutes before finally saying: âHi.â
Hi? It sounds so out of character for him.
âHey, claws,â you force a smile, still avoiding to meet his gaze. âDo you need anything?â
Logan points to his empty glass, like a toddler asking for more cereal. âI also wanted to talk to you.â
âI thought you were busy over there,â you say, surprisingly managing to sound nonchalant, despite the jealousy bubbling underneath your friendly tone. âDid you get her number?â
âWhat? No.â
âWhy not? Sheâs cute.â
Yeah, maybe you donât sound as collected as you think.
Whether Logan notices it or not, he chooses not to mention it. He folds his arms over his chest, fixing his brown eyes on you. âIâm not interested.â
âAnd what is it that interests you, champ?â your question elicits a low chuckle from him. Just as he opens his mouth to seemingly reply, Gwen appears out of nowhere to ask you about the price of a certain drink. Your gaze shifts between her and Logan, who remains focused on you while sipping his drink.
After that, Gwen leaves. The man in front of you goes poker-faced, pursing his lips, and his abrupt change in demeanor alarms you. âWade wants to have dinner tomorrow at his apartmentâ well, our apartment. I live with him now. Itâs complicated,â he adds with a dismissive wave of his hand, and you laugh. âAnyway, he asked me to tell you that youâre invited. I know we donât know each other that much, but⊠he said you seem like someone worth havinâ around,â he mumbles awkwardly, eyes downcast. âI think the same as well.â
You could die at peace.
âYouâre a lucky fucker because I donât work on Sundays,â you quip, smiling. âIâd be more than happy to attend your feast.â
âGreat. I thought you would turn down the invitation.â
âNow why would you think that?â
ââCause you barely know meâ us,â he corrects himself rapidly. âPlus, Wadeâs annoying as hell when he puts his mind to it. Youâll see.â
âMarital problems?â he actually in response. âIâll take that as a âyesâ. Oh, Iâll bring the dessert.â
âYou donât have to.â
âBut I do want to,â you tilt your head in an effort to hide your longing for him.
âJust want to get under my skin, huh? I can see why Wade likes you,â Logan beams, reaching out to tuck a $100 bill into the pocket of your apron. âThe tipâs included.â
âI donât know how things work in your universe, but youâre giving me way more money than youâre supposed to. I can't accept this.â
âOh, but you will,â his gravelly voice fucks your system up, and youâre glad he canât see how you squeeze your legs together behind the bar.
He writes down Wadeâs address on a random napkin, holding his breath as he stands up. âI should get goinâ. See you tomorrow then.â
Before he walks out the door, you stop him. âLogan? You didnât answer my other question.â
His back shakes momentarily with laughter. Turning around to face you, his stare leaves you even more confused. âGood night, doll.â
This is becoming a habit: every time he goes away, you feel as though youâve just run a marathon with no water available. Your mouth is completely dry, your fingers are numb and thereâs a knot in your stomach thatâs becoming all too familiar.
âWould you mind telling me where you got him?â Gwenâs voice makes you almost jump out of your skin.
âHeâs not from around here. I think heâs Canadian.â
Youâve got this. Youâve got this. Youâve got this.
Knocking softly on Wadeâs door, you step back, the container holding the tiramisu cold to your touch. Itâs your first time trying out this recipe, so youâre expecting it to at least not taste like shit.
Wade answers the apartment door, acting surprised when you remain silent. âWell, look what the wind blew in: if it isnât my husbandâs lover. How dare you? Weâre still going to couples therapy.â
You show him the container, and he squints at it. âTiramisu. You want it or not?â
âI hate twenty-somethings,â he says with a defeated sigh, stepping aside to let you into the apartment.Â
Leaving your purse on the nearest surface, you scan the living room, wondering where Logan might be. Thereâs a small mirror beneath the couch, and you check yourself for the hundredth time tonight. âDonât get too excited. Heâs still showering,â Wadeâs voice rings in your ears, and you turn to look at him, your eyebrows knitted. âYeah. I noticed. Youâre already drooling over that big piece of metal between his legs.â
âKeep quiet!â you cover his mouth with your palm, noticing the scarred state of his skin up close. âWade, you fucking dog. Are you licking my hand?â
âCouldnât help it. You taste like mascarpone cheese and espresso.â
Then Logan emerges from the bathroom, with only a white towel draped around his waist. Droplets of water fall from his wet hair, tracing the muscle of his abs, ending somewhere beneath his happy trail. Your eyes keep flickering between him and his torso until he clears his throat. âI thought you were cominâ later.â
âMe too, but IâŠ,â you trail off, your brain struggling to catch up, âI didnât know what else to do at my place.â
âItâs fine. Justâ let me put on some clothes.â
âPlease donât,â Wade murmurs next to you, but Logan only scoffs. âI was just being honest. Communication is key.â
When Wade and you are alone again, he lets out a harsh breath. âThat was probably the hottest thing Iâve ever seen. My pants are really tight right now.â
âThin walls, buddy!â Logan shouts from his bedroom, earning a laugh from you.Â
Like A Prayer starts playing. Wade moves his hips to the beat, getting lost in the melody. âIs that your phone?â
âYeah, but I always take a few seconds to dance to it. Such a banger!â he says, then picks up his phone, accepting the call. âHey, Ness! WhatÂŽs up?â Wade covers the speaker before telling you: âItâs Vanessa. My ex-girlfriend. We fuck once a week, sometimes even twice.â
From behind, Logan nudges your arm with his, looking at you. âHey, kid.â
âNo, Iâm not busy at all,â Wade exclaims, grabbing his crotch and thrusting into the air. âIâll be there in ten, cupcake. See you,â he spreads his arms wide and whistles. âSomeoneâs getting laid tonight!â
âYou made me come all the way here⊠and now youâre leaving?â
âWhat? My friend Wolverine wanted to invite you over. I just had to provide the apartment,â in one quick movement, he presses a kiss to your cheek, then does the same to Logan. âShave yourself, will you?â
âGo fuck yourself, will you?â
âLove you too, honey. Hope you two lovebirds have a good night, because I know I will!â
Wade throws a wink over his shoulder before heading out, the apartment going dead silent. Logan and you stand frozen, staring at each other, although he quickly drops his gaze, unable to maintain eye contact. A giggle threatens to escape you: he wanted to see you. Could he possibly enjoy your company as much as you enjoy his?
Logan watches the spot where Wave had just been. The absence of his chaotic energy makes the room feel strangely empty now. He coughs lightly, the sound awkwardly loud in the quiet room.
âSo... I, uh, bought pizza,â he says, his voice a little too casual, as if trying to cover up his nervousness. Averting his eyes, he focuses on the pizza boxes on the table.
You catch the hesitation in his tone, your curiosity piqued by his discomfort. Tilting your head, a teasing smile forms on your lips. âPizza, huh? You sure know how to impress a girl.â
Logan chuckles, the sound strained, as he scratches the back of his neck. âYeah, well, I figured it was a safe choice. Didnât want to ruin it, yâknow?â
You move closer to the table, the warmth from the pizza boxes radiating against your hands as you open one of them. The rich smell of melted cheese and pepperoni fills the air, a comforting scent that makes your stomach growl softly. âThank you. Iâm a big fan of pizza.â
He sits in the chair across from you, taking a bite of his slice. You watch him quietly, your own thoughts churning. The truth of his origins had been a shock at first, but now, it just made you want to know more about the man. What was his life like in the other universe? Did he miss it? Was he happier here, or was he longing to return?
âLoganâŠ,â you begin, your tone gentle but probing, âCan I ask you something?â
He glances up at you, eyes widening. Thereâs something in your eyes âan understanding, maybeâ that makes him feel like you could see right through him.Â
âSure,â he replies, trying to sound more at ease than he really feels. âAsk away.â
You hesitate for a moment, not wanting to push too hard. âI was wondering... would it be okay if I asked you some questions? About, you know, your life. Where you're from.â
The bite of pizza suddenly feels heavy in his mouth. He hadnât talked much about his world, not even with Wade. Partly because it was too painful, and partly because he wasnât sure how to explain how things turned out for him. He nods slowly, setting his slice down. âYeah, it's okay. Iâll answer what I can.â
âI just... I want to understand you better.â
âWell, first and foremost, Iâm no hero. You should know that by now.â
âI beg to differ.â
âKid, Iâm the worst Logan. A complete failure. Of all the variants out there, Wade just had to pick the one despised by every living soul on his earth,â Logan looks away, his voice low and heavy. Youâre wondering if doing this was a good idea. âI need a drink.â
He gets up and you follow him into the kitchen. He rummages through the fridge, in search of a cold beer. Meanwhile, you attempt to find the right words. âI donât thinkââ
With a sharp flick of his wrist, three metal claws sprout from between his knuckles. A gasp catches in your throat as he uses his claws to pierce the beer can, drinking from the punctured holes. Once heâs done, he goes back to staring at you. Your gaze, on the other hand, is still glued to the now-empty beer can. âWhat?â he asks, exhaling slowly.
âThat was completely unnecessary,â you mutter, and he lets out a bitter chuckle, tossing the can into the trash. âBut, back to what you said beforeâ I donât think youâre the worst Logan.â
âYou didnât know me back then, darlinâ. I fucked it up,â he leans against the counter, arms crossed defensively over his chest. âLike the Logan from this universe, I once belonged to the X-Men too. I remember that Scott used to beg me to wear my suit. So did Jean, Storm, Beastâ All of them,â his gaze grows more distant, and you can tell that memories are flooding his mind. âWanted me to be part of the team, but I wouldnât do it. Told them they looked fucking ridiculous.â
The pizzaâs long forgotten. You take the risk and get a bit closer to him, your eyes never leaving his.Â
Loganâs silence stretches for a moment before he speaks again. âOne day, while I was off on my own, the humans came. They went mutant hunting.â
Your heart clenches at the pain in his voice. He still remembers everything as if it had happened yesterday. âI can guess the rest. You donât have toââ
But he cuts you off. âNo, let me say it. I need to say it,â he takes a deep breath, lowering his head. âBy the time I stumbled home, shit-faced from the bar, it was too late. They were dead. They called after me and I walked away.â
Reaching out, your hand gently brushes against his. He doesnât pull away, but instead searches for your eyes. âMy suit's all I've got to remind me of who they were. What I did. I found them and they were⊠dead. I started killing, and I couldnât stop. I didnât want to stop. I turned the whole world against the X-Men.â
You tighten your grip on his hand, knowing thereâs nothing you can do to change how he feels. âYouâre not a bad person, Logan,â he shakes his head, mumbling something you canât quite catch. âI mean it. What happened back then doesnât define you. You took the blame for their deaths upon yourself. I can tell you loved them deeply, and Iâll never fully understand the pain you feel. I wish I could. I wish I could take it away, make you forget somehow, but I canât. Thatâs not how life works. But you got your second chance: you saved this world. My world,â gently cupping his face in your hands, you allow your fingers to caress his cheeks. He leans into your touch, watching you with half-lidded eyes. âYouâre my hero. Iâm your biggest fanâ after Wade, obviously, which is a lot to say.â
He grins, letting out a laugh. âEasy there, bub.â
âShould I give you some space?â
Thatâs the last thing he wants from you right now. You already know that as he looks you up and down, placing his hands on the small of your back, his thumbs drawing small circles on your skin. Thereâs no turning backâ The warmth between you feels almost like a fever dream. âFor a long time, all I wanted was to disappear. I couldnât stand waking up every morning, knowing that another day awaited me.â
âAnd what happened?â your breath mingles with his, his closeness becoming nearly intoxicating. âWhat changed?â
âI met a pretty girl at a pub, thatâs what happened,â he murmurs, his dilated pupils flicking up to meet your gaze. âIâm gonna kiss you now.â
âDo all your kisses come with a warning?â
âGod, do you ever shut up?â
You donât have time to respond because he kisses you there and then. His stubble scrapes your skin as your mouths meet again and again, needy hands that hold you as if you were prone to breaking. Logan licks into your mouth, sliding his tongue against yours and swallowing every one of your whimpers.
âSo this is what it takes to shut you up, huh?â he murmurs against your lips. You can feel him smiling, and it makes your heart skip a beat.Â
âKeep talking and you wonât get a single bite of my tiramisu,â you tease him, kissing him again, the taste of beer numbing your senses. âI really like kissing you.â
âThe feelingâs mutual, but now that youâve mentioned that tiramisuâŠâ
âAm I that easily replaced?â
âNo. Youâre just a pain in the ass.â
Jokes aside, youâre as happy as a clam.
Since that night you and Logan kissed, youâve been living your best life. Like a freaking schoolgirl with a crush. Some things never seem to change.
He hasnât been to the bar in three days. Yes, youâre counting them. No, you havenât lost your mind. You want to see him, but thereâs something about making the first move that gives you the chills. What would his reaction be if you showed outside of apartment?
Itâs been a long time since youâve been with anybody. On top of that, all the guys youâve dated were your age. Being with someone that older than you certainly wasnât no your plans. Youâd be lying if you said that the mere idea of being with him in that way didnât excite you.
Oh boy, you miss him. You miss his scruffy voice, his gorgeous hair. And you two arenât even official yet. To be honest, you donât even know what he wants from you. Is he even the type to be in a relationship?
âNighty night, gentlemen,â you say to Gary and his friends as you find yourself in front of them, smoothing your apron. Gwen had called in sick tonight, so itâs just you at the bar babysitting a bunch of grown-men.
âWhatâs up, doll? Youâve forgotten about us. We miss you coming in here to chat,â Garyâs eating his burger at the same time he speaks, something you find repulsive, but youâve seen worse. âYâknow, Iâd love to take you out someday. I have a place youâd like.â
The other men laugh and punch him in the back, just boosting his ego. Pathetic.Â
âIâll let you know when Iâm free,â you reply with the most polite smile you can offer, intending to go on. âWhat are you having tonight?â
âYou always pull that shit, baby. I donât think youâre so busy that you canât accept a date.â
You hate the way heâs looking at you, as if you were wrong for not being interested. As if you didnât know any better.
âYouâre reading minds now? Shocking, Gary.â
âOh, doll. That attitude of yours shows youâve never been with a real man like me, thatâs all,â he leans back in his chair, resting one of his arms on the table and the other one near his crotch, manspreading. âItâs alright. I like you bratty.â
âIâll be back when you finally have something to order,â you attempt to turn around but he grabs your wrist, pulling you closer. Your eyes lock, and he seems to enjoy this: being in control. Like a predator hunting his prey. âCome on, Gary. I donât want to have to kick you out.â
âItâs not that you don't like me, right? Youâve already got your mouth full.â
âCareful.â
âWhat? Donât tell me youâre not fucking that useless mutant. I see you like âem older. Pretty little things like you drive me wild.â
You laugh in his face, showing him your teeth. âIt was never about your age, Gary. Youâre right: I do like them older. Iâm just not into bald, vertically-challenged pricks.â
His entourage of idiots goes silent after that. He looks up at you, eyes burning with hatred. His grip on your wrist tightens, probably leaving a mark. âFucking bitch.â
âGet your hands off her.â
Loganâs voice forces the two of you to look in his direction. It seems that heâs just arrived at the pub, his jacket still on.Â
âYou joining us? Weâre just getting started here, big boy.â
âDid you not hear me?â Logan lunges forward, his nose almost touching Garyâs. âThe fuck is wrong with you?â
âEasy there, cowboy. Iâm just having a chat with your girl. Sheâs one of the good ones, Iâll give you that,â arching a sly brow, his forehead puckers. âYou donât like sharing? We can even take turns.â
Logan clenches his jaw, lips set in a grim line. âSay one more word, and Iâll fucking kill you.â
âIâll give you a full sentence instead: can you even get it up?âÂ
The tension in the air is thick, every second stretching out as Logan's anger simmers dangerously close to the surface. Garyâs smug grin only makes it worse, pushing him to the edge. Before you can react, Loganâs fist swings forward, connecting with Garyâs jaw with a sickening crack. Gary staggers back, realising your wrist. Blood seeps from his nose, his white shirt becoming stained with it. âYou fucker! You broke my nose!â
âWeâre just getting started here, big boy,â Logan mocks him, repeating his previous words.
âStop!â you shout, moving quickly to grab his arm, trying to pull him back. But heâs beyond hearing, his rage blinding him to everything else. He shakes you off, and with a fierce growl, drives another punch into Garyâs stomach. The latter doubles over, gasping for air, the wind knocked out of him. He then falls to the floor, curling into a ball. People start to gather around you, and soon your beloved bar becomes a box ring.
âThatâs enough, Logan! Heâs barely conscious,â you murmur under your breath, stepping between them, hands up in a desperate attempt to create some space. Logan pauses, chest heaving, fists still clenched, as he finally looks at you. The wildness in his eyes starts to fade, replaced by a dawning realization of what heâs done.
âHe deserved it,â he nods vigorously to himself, as if trying to explain his point. âHe was hurting you.â
âIf you keep that up, youâre going to kill him. My bar is not a fucking cemetery,â your voice trembles a little bit, expecting to talk some sense into him. âI wonât let you do this.â
The room is quiet now, the only sound being Loganâs heavy breathing as he stands there, still tense, still processing. You turn to Garyâs friends, cold fury in your eyes. âGet him out of here,â you watch as they haul him up, practically dragging him to the door. The other clients continue to stare at Logan, their mouths hanging open. âEverybody out, right now! Go home. Weâre closing earlier tonight.â
Adam is the last person to leave, slamming the door behind him. You rush to the counter, searching for a mop to clean the fresh blood off the floor. Still agitated, the images of Logan hitting Gary flash in your mind. He approaches you from behind, his fingers circling your forearm. âBubââ
âDonât. Now is not the time.â
âI was protecting you.â
âI told you to stop, and you didnât. You just shook me off,â you snap, glancing at his knuckles which are not even bruised. Slamming your eyes shut, you get to your feet and wash your hands in the sink, the remaining water becoming reddish for a moment.
Logan moves closer, resting his chin on your shoulder. He wraps his arms lazily around your middle section. âIâm sorry.â
You turn in his arms, your back flushed against the sink and your nose in the air. âWhy didnât you call me?â
âI donât have a phone.â
âButâ Jesus, Logan. You couldâve come sooner. I thought you regretted what happened the other day,â you say and the muscles in his face twitch, his body stiffening at your words. âThought you no longer wanted me.â
âNo, bub. Iâ I still want you. I want all of you, trust me,â he murmurs, and you allow him to press his body against yours, the scent of the cigar he must have smoked recently enveloping your senses. âI just⊠donât know how to do this. I have a habit of ruining things, and Iâm trying to figure out the best way to be with you without hurting you.â
âPushing me away also hurts,â your eyes flick up to meet his gaze again, and he whispers under his breath. âI canât read your mind. You need to tell me whatâs going on in that ancient skull of yours.â
His face falters, flashing you a mischievous look. His hand creeps under the fabric of your shirt, fingernails scrapping against your spine. âIâm sorry, princess. I truly am.â
âYou canât just say âsorryâ with that voice and expect me toââ
Youâre cut off by his lips crashing down onto yours. You melt into the kiss, unable to deny what your body has been craving for the past days.Â
âI thought your kisses came with a warning,â you say, detaching your mouth from his, a smile spreading uncontrollably in your face as you see his toothy grin.
âShut up and kiss me, will you?â
In a clash of tongues and teeth, your mouths meet once again. Tugging the hair at his nape, you feel him growl against your lips. His strong hands trace every curve of your body, kneading the flesh of your hips and undoing the knot at the back of your apron. Youâre becoming one with the sink, but in a moment like this, you couldnât care less. Loganâs hard on nudges your lower stomach, and he ruts against you like an animal.
âYou said you wanted to know whatâs on my mind, right?â his teeth nibble on the skin of your neck, syrupy voice going straight to your core. âWell, Iâd love nothing more than to touch you right now.â
âRight here? On the counter?â
âYeah, on the fucking counter,â he grabs you by your thighs, hosting you up and placing your body on top of the cold bar. He nudges your knees apart, his bulge meeting your clothed cunt deliciously. âWill you let me, baby? Can I make you come in here?â
âPlease. Iâm glad we have such a low budget. Camera installment is tâtoo expensive these days.â
âDo you always talk this much?â he slowly unbuttons your pants, and you help him to remove them.
âYes. Next question,â your breath hitches in your throat as you feel the pad of his thumb circling your clit through your panties. Your eyelids drop, your head lolling back. âFuck, that feels good.â
Logan hums, mesmerized with the way your hips roll into his hand, your whimpers sounding like music to his ears. âYou have any idea how I felt when I saw him touching you? Wanted to rip his hands off you,â his eyes drift to your chest, how it rises and falls with impatience. âBut itâs me who gets to have you like this. He can fantasize about you all he wants: Iâm the only one who touches you, ainât I right?â you sigh with content as his fingers graze your slit, aimlessly bucking your hips. He doesnât go any further, and you tug at the collar of his flannel, needing more of his callousand hands on you. âNuh-uh. You want something, you gotta use your words. Got it?â
âI wâwant your fingers inside me,â you donât even recognize your own voice at this point. The few guys you had slept with had never been very talkative during sex. But Logan isnât like them. This is just the beginning and youâre already starting to realize that he has a dirty mouth, that expectant look on his face as he waits to see your reaction to his words. âPlease, Logan. I want you so bad.â
âOh, I know, bub. Thereâs something about me I donât think you know,â he inserts one of his fingers in your cunt, your slick coating the palm of his hand. âThese claws I have⊠they didnât come on their own. Letâs just say my sense of smell is⊠pretty good,â Logan can almost see the gears turning in your head as you try to think coherently. He moves his middle finger in and out of you, stretching your walls. âAnd you⊠have been wet ever since the first time you saw me. Always nice to everybody, making sure they feel at ease,â you feel like youâre being stretched even further, another one of his fingers sinking into your warm pussy. âBut youâre so needy, too. How long has it been since someone touched you like this?â
âToo long, fâfuck. Too long,â youâre squirming, a totally whiny mess. He retratcs his wet fingers and instead goes back to flicking your clit, this time with much less delicacy. His left hand squeezes your tits, and you hate the fact that youâre still wearing clothes. âShit, Logan. I need you to fuck me. Please. Need your cock.â
His face comes to rest at your neck, and you feel lingering kisses and bites that keep you grounded to earth. âNot here. I need a bed to fuck you properly. Youâre only getting my fingers now,â he positions them inches away from your entrance, testing your patience. âTell me who owns this pussy.â
âL-loganââ
âTell me and Iâll make you come,â his husky voice is making you dizzy, tears shimmering in your eyes. âCome on. Know you want it as much as I do.â
You succumb to the tentation, like divinity turned to sin. He kisses you roughly, and you struggle to find the correct words. âItâs you, Logan. You own my pussy. Itâs f-fucking yours.â
With that, he goes back to nudging that spot that makes you see starts, that filthy squelching sound getting mixed up with your moans. The knot in your belly keeps growing tighter the more he pumps his fingers in and out of you.Â
âI said you were only getting my fingers for now, but fuck⊠I need to gest a taste of this sweet cunt.â
Heâs on his knees in an instant, urging your legs apart to make room for his body. Your thighs tighten around his face as he licks a hot stripe up your folds, tracing a heated path on your cunt, not wishing to waste a single second. Pleasure builds quickly, your breath hitching as your hands find their way into his hair, pulling him closer when your body begins to tremble.Â
âIâm close,â you pant, breathing hard, grinding your hips against his face. âIâm so close.â
âThatâs it. Come in my mouth like the good girl you are.â
Who had given him a damn script for this?
The release is explosive. Like the peak of a roller coaster: you go up up up, ascending higher. You think you almost see Jesus, but at some point, you also have to crash down with force. Your shoulders slump, your entire body cramping up; yet he doesnât let you go that easily, his fingers still working, scissoring within you while you ride out the final waves of your high, drawing out every last moment of ecstasy.
Once you finally manage to open your eyes, there he is, staring down at you. He taps your lower lip with his fingers, and then mutters: âOpen.â
And you do, because youâre just as messed up as he is. Your mouth parts, and he slides his fingers between your lips, dragging them smoothly across your tongue. His knuckles brush the back of your throat, and you gag around the intrusion, tasting yourself. He pulls his fingers out of your mouth, clearly satisfied with the way youâve cleaned them off.
âI think we should really pay a visit to your apartment,â he suggests, groaning in defeat, and you feel his bulge poking your hip. He must be painfully hard. âI meant what I said earlier. I need a bed if weâre going to fuck. My backâs hurting.â
You raise an eyebrow, the corner of your mouth curving into a smirk. âWhy not go to yours?â
âWadeâs in there. I wouldnât be able to concentrate.â
You canât help but laugh, pausing a moment to collect your thoughts, heat rising to your cheeks. âSo weâre going rodeo?â
Aiming to silence up, Logan kisses you, pinching your chin between his thumb and forefinger. âOnly if you can handle it.â
part 2: âGIVE ME THE FIRST TASTEâ
dividers by: @/cafekitsune thank you!!! :)
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#also god bless my friend who pointed out that im moving up and im going to be in a salon soon and will actually be doing something good with#my life vs the friend who did me this way pretending shes still in high school that freaks out and loses all her friends every 6 months#i wish it didnt bother me. and i know in 2 months im going to have brushed it off and move on like i always do when bad shit happens#but for the wound being fresh this shit just fucking sucks i hate it i hate it i hate it#i made a very very very vague post on reddit just asking for advice#and the more popular reply was someone more on my side who basically said i should tell her to go fuck herself pretty much#and the second one was someone who v obviously did not actually read the post who said it was all fluff and basically defended her even#when in my post i am saying i defended myself while still listening to the shit she says#and i fucking hate reddit bc people are so.....quick to be hateful and judge#and i knew to expect people being hateful but god DAMN like you yourself are basically saying theres not enough info (yes there was) and you#still are quicker to assume im in the wrong#meanwhile everyone who knows her is like bitch we told you to not forgive her last time and now look where you are#and i am not a perfect person i have flaws the same way everyone else does. literally everyone has said and done shit they regret#and i have fucked her over before because she lost her fucking mind on a campus manager and an educator and she told me to find my own ride#home because i didnt defend her losing her shit and screaming at everyone and ended up having to write an incident report (so did the other#girls who watched it happen so nOT just me) anyways now she uses that as an excuse for treating me like fucking trash because she finally#found out about the god damn incident report which made it so now anyone can say i said anything and she just believes it#its such a fucking joke to me because like ????? girl if we were in opposite positions you would have filled out the fuckin report too#granted it was a handwritten letter and not a report but it was basically the exact same thing as an incident report#my bad that a year ago i wrote a letter saying i was scared you know where i live and that youre mentally unstable. funny how a year later i#feel the same way all over again! except i dont because im not scared of her anymore shes a fucking theater kid who needs to get a grip#i cant wait to look at my self tag again in 2 years and be like DAMN REMEMBER WHEN THAT HAPPENED#every single person who knows her that isnt friends with her (i am basically refusing to text her friends bc i dont even want to know)#keeps telling me i didnt do anything wrong and ive given her too many chances and she fucks me each time#i just wish she would go get help bro there is something so wrong with her#self
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Rockstar!gojo x art student!femreader
synopsis- satoru gojo fell in love with you when he was 17. He tried everything to gain your attentionâjoining the student council, participating in every extracurriculars, performing well in academics yet nothing worked. That was until high school. In college, having been forced into a band, he needed to find a new artist for their posters which he requested shoko to take care of. What he didn't expect was shoko to bring you as a volunteerâ
warnings- college!au, satoru being heads over heels for you, heâs so damn in LOVE save my boy, friends to lovers, misunderstanding, SEMI PUBLIC SMUT, fingering, oral fem receiving, PUSSY DRUNK GOJO, dirty talk, creampie, BALL OF FLUFF, ANGST, mentions of smoking and alcoholism, super cute ending
w.c- 8.2k (have faith)
a/n's note- i'd poured out my heart in this (especially the smut). i hope you all do like this. your comments and reblogs are highly appreciated as it helps motivating me for writing long ass fics. taglist is open you can ask me to join. love ya' all!!
When satoru met you for the first time, he was 11 years old.Â
You were the daughter of his motherâs friend whom he heard of so many times. Though the accidental reunion in the mall while grocery shopping was the first time satoru ever had the opportunity to meet you face to face.Â
It was a totally random encounter, coincidental even, you can say when your mother recognised satoruâs mom and both squealed like teenagers. They'd a lot to catch up with, thus having their kids entertain each other in the play section was convincing enough for them to chit chat in a cafe.
And this is how satoru ended up being stuffed, hand in hand with you, to go enjoy in the play section as his mother patted his back, asking him to be good to you.Â
âDon't leave her hand, okay toru?! Make sure you both stay together.â His mom said before scooting herself with your mom.Â
Satoru looked at you, his hand locked in yours as you made eye contact with him before shying away, looking in the other direction. He stood confused before pulling you to the gaming section, without any word.Â
He scanned amongst the box of video games, before pulling out one which caught his eyes with his unoccupied hand. He gave a side look to you, reluctantly asking âyou want to play this?âÂ
You gaze down at the video game he held in his hands, eyes sparkling a bit, if satoru wasn't seeing things, then raise your head to look at him again. âIt has vibrant colours.âÂ
Satoru nodded, feeling a little giddy that you liked his preference. âIt's called mario kart.â
âOh.â Your eyes widened as he revealed the name.Â
âDo you know how to play it?â You shake your head at his question. âThen I can teach you!âÂ
âReally?âÂ
âYeah, let's go and install it on the playstation.âÂ
By the time satoruâs mother returns with your mum, they find satoru giggling along with you, hands still locked with each other, as he points to various stacked video games.Â
That day slowly came to an end and satoru didn't get to see you for the next two years till your giggles became a distant echo and your face a blur.Â
By the time he was 14, he almost forgot you.Â
Until that one day when he noticed you, sitting alone with your lunch staring at the sky at the campus of his high school.Â
You were biting on your chopsticks with dreamy eyes as recognition drew in satoru's mind.Â
Y/nâ he thought. His brows frowned, thoughts slowly going in a muddle. How are you here? eating lunch in his high school campus unlessâ you're a student over here too! Satoru felt foolish, his lips slowly curving in a smile lifting one hand, abandoning the basketball in the other to greet you.Â
However, before he can get his words voiced out to you, gaining your attention, a brown haired girl comes up to you dragging you along with her in a hurry.Â
Satoru's hand froze in mid air, awkwardly stretching it above his head before bringing it down and turning towards his friends. He sprinted back to his group resuming the game, yet his mind stayed with you and your dreamy eyes.Â
He wanted to say âhiâ and watch your eyes grow wide before nodding your head just like you did back then. He wanted to show you the basketball he was holding and maybe teach you how to play ball just like he did back then.Â
âOi satoru! Why are you missing the catch?!â one of his friends shouted, breaking him free of his daze. âsorryâŠtaking a break!â He said, excusing himself, before going and plopping himself down on a nearby bench.Â
He recognised the brown haired girlâYura. She often came to him asking for little favours. Did she know you? A friend? You studied in the same school and yet he only saw you today. Where were you all this time? Satoru was the same age as you. So you were bound to be in the same class, maybe different sections but he knew students from the other sections too. How come he didn't notice you yet?
The recess was over soon and he ran back to his class. Before entering the class, he noticed you again, hurrying to the class next to him.Â
Class 1-2.
Satoru felt silly as he read the classroom name in his mind.Â
As the final semester rolled on and a new semester started, satoru found out class 1-2 changed to class 2-2 and this year he was in the same section as yours.Â
He was excited to finally be able to talk to you without any awkwardness. After all, you were in the same classroom nowâ which means you will know him when he introduces himself on the first day of class. You will see him, introducing himself aloud and clear and recognition will draw on your face as you remember him.Â
That's what he initially thought the night before the first class. Until satoru felt the urge to perfect his speech and kept on practicing it, holding the crumpled sheet in his clammy hands, past midnight.Â
As a result he woke up late and by the time he hurried himself to school, the self introduction was half-over. He mumbled his apologies to his homeroom teacher, before hastily introducing himself and going to his assigned seat.Â
With that his perfect speech plan of gaining your attention bombed miserably. He raised his head in the direction of your seatâfirst row second desk, way far than hisâ fourth row last desk.Â
That's when he decided with the determination inclining in his heart to get your attention and make you remember that it's him.Â
The plan was simple. He just have to wait till recess and watch his chances closely. Once you're free and alone he will go make a move saying âhelloâ! Maybe even ask for your number.Â
Recess hour came by and his plan chose to bite the dust with girls and boys swarming around him to get his number and be friends with him. The group kept him occupied for the entirety of the recess and by the time he was done you were no where to be found in class.Â
Similar things happened the next day and the next day and the next day, never ceasing to leave him alone.Â
Satoru eventually came up with another planâ excelling in academics. The more he's good in academics, the more are the chances for you to come up to him wanting his help to understand a problem. And the plan worked exceptionally well with girls frequenting him with a doubt in their lessonâ except for you.Â
This time satoru came up with his active participation in extracurriculars and sports. The more he active he is the more is the chance of you joining the same activity or maybe seek his assistance for the upcoming sports day.
This plan too, was indeed prodigious and did attracted a lot of attention except yours.Â
His last option was of joining the student council. As the spirited member of the top student council, you might come up to him with a problem you're facing or anything you want to change.Â
So, without thinking much he did joined the student council, hoping to finally gain your attention. However the following week, concerns and requests for changes decreased promptly. The other council members sighed, few scrutinizing satoru. After all no one in the entire school would want their so very handsome, energetic and popular Satoru Gojo to have a heavy work load after school.Â
âSince we don't have any work to do now, thanks to gojo-kun, I'd gladly like you all to only maintain the regular class desk arrangement.â the student council president announced before leaving the council room.Â
Satoru sighed, this isn't what he thought. He just wanted your attention not the entire schoolâs. Everyone looked at him, when he walked, when he sat, when he ate, people always turned around to take a second look. Yet you never laid your eyes on him. Even being in the same class you never came up to him to chat.Â
Back slouched, with his tie undone, he slammed the door open of his classroom to pick up his bag.Â
You flinched.Â
Hand covering your mouth, a dust wiper on the other, you looked at him as he froze.Â
One entire year, was how satoru spent to gain your attention, to get you look at him, and when it finally happened the time seemed to halt. The sun rays pooled into the room with slow breezes messing up your bangs and satoru couldn't mutter a word but stare.
Conscious about him gaping, he tore his gaze away from you before shutting the door, this time gently.Â
The council president asked them to take care of class desk arrangements. However, the desks in his classroom have always been arranged, even before he joined the student council.
âyouâŠum arrange the desks everyday?â He said fixing his tie, slowly walking up to his desk, wiped clean by you. âYes.âÂ
Satoru accompanies you cleaning and arranging for the rest of the time in complete silence. Soon you take your leave, and so does satoru but this was the time he was happy like really really happy.Â
He didn't exchange any words of recognition with you, from the day at the mall. He didn't talk. Yet he was beaming radiant, for just being with you, momentarily alone, in peace.Â
That day soon came to an end and another year passed by. Satoru did nothing but admire you from afar. This was the only way he felt the closest to you. He saw how you wiped and arranged the desks everyday; help people without even letting them notice; lend the only pencil you have without a word; and care for the garden whose garish flowers were disregarded by others.Â
The more he saw, the more he knew you. And the more he felt his heart slipping away.Â
You were kind, gentle and soft. You noticed people behind their masks. You regarded the smallest of the things with such care. And your delicate hands, often smeared with paint, held the responsibility of others without complaining.Â
He often saw yura asking favours from you, shoving her cleaning duties to you, sending you to get her lunch from the 7-eleven nearby and never once you said 'no'. You were so so precious.Â
He knew heâd to stop; the way you engrossed him, linger on his mind all day to the point that he was unable to think of anything but you was straight up creepy but his eyes never stopped searching for you.
Even in the midst of the crowds on a random road his eyes would unconsciously seek for you.Â
And by the time he was 17, satoru was hopelessly, absurdly and miserably in love with you.
Another year passed by and he could do nothing but stare. And the fact that you often looked at him too made things even worse.Â
He was so down bad for you that he couldn't keep on going like this anymore. He was so sure he'd confess to you on the day of graduating the high school, not caring about rejection.Â
Satoru stayed up an entire night, perfecting his confession. But by the time the graduation ceremony ended and he went to look out for you, you were nowhere to be found.Â
He asked yura about you, to which she replied that you went back home early and satoru had his heart broken at 18.Â
He couldn't move on easily but giving you up was the only option left. Unwillingly, satoru made his devastating decision of giving you up. He never thought he would see you again until a few years later in college, shoko brought you right in front of him.Â
âWe need a new artist to cover up for this concert.â said geto suguru, stuffing his phone back in his pockets. âWhy? What happened to ren?âÂ
âGot himself into an accident and fractured his right arm.â Geto plops himself back down on the couch beside satoru, before pulling on the fretboard of his bass.Â
âShould visit him then.âÂ
âForget it.âÂ
âWhy?â frowned satoru, geto suguruâhis best friend, the one he went to middle and high school with, was not the type to feign indifference. His behavior indeed had satoru confused.Â
âNanami informed he got drunk at the last concert before getting himself into the accident. Drunk driving it is.âÂ
âDid yaga find out about this?âÂ
âFortunately, he didn't. Nanami covered the case before him finding out,â geto brought his hand, swiping back his string of bangs, âif it reaches yaga, he will ban us from using the campus stadium.â
âlucky I'd sayâŠso what now?â The next concert is in 3 days and the band poster is still incomplete.Â
Shortly after satoru joined his college, suguru started a band along with two other guys. The band was doing well but due to a disagreement they decided to split up. Suguru then suggested satoru join the band and the following year they gained another member named nanami kento.Â
They used to hold performances at random pubs but as its popularity increased, the college decided to give them the campus stadium to hold their concerts. Something they did extra was hiring an artist to do their band posterâ hand-drawn. It'd become a little traditionâ a lucky charm says suguru, and now that their artist had broken his hand right at the eleventh hour before the concert they will have toâÂ
âFind a new one.âÂ
ânanaââ geto shuts him before he could finish his sentence. âNanami is trying his best, so am I. So, you try finding one too.â
âHow am I supposed to?âÂ
âWell I'm sure if you go with a face like this to the art department, people would volunteer in a line.âÂ
âSame goes with you, why don't you go and ask. I'm sure if you could wear your shirt a little loose you can surely get your clingy ex find a good one." Gojo says in a mocking tone, grabbing his guitar and looping it around his back before leaving the club.
He was sure annoyed, but he will have to find one, geto wasn't in a mood to joke earlier either. Rather than going by himself, he decided to ask shoko get it done for him; he was sure she'd agree for a few packs of cigarettes.Â
Walking on his way to the parking lot he texted shoko to meet at their regular cafe.Â
âSup!âÂ
Satoru smiled knowing shoko could never fail him, even if she didn't agree right away a little guilt trip will do.Â
âAll good?âÂ
âYeah, what do you need?âÂ
âJust a little favour.âÂ
âAnd what that might be?âÂ
âGet an appropriate artist from the art department. Ren broke his arm and suguru's so down about going himself, yaâ know about his ex,â shoko started grabbing her cup of iced coffee to retreat when gojo slammed two packets of cigarettes on the table. âI've two more packs to offer.âÂ
Shoko returns to her seat, a big smile on her face. âOkay! Since I'm your empathetic, gracious and compassionate friend, I will try and see what I can get done.âÂ
âYes pleaseâŠâÂ
âI'm not doing it for cigarettes yaâ know.âÂ
âMhmmmâ satoru nods his face dramatically.
âGet the other two packets out.âÂ
âSure.âÂ
Satoru knew four packets would get the job done as he parted away from shoko, driving his way back home.Â
And the next day when shoko texted him that she got a volunteer and is bringing her to the club, he didn't expected it to be you.
Shoko looped a hand around your shoulders âso this is the club,â chewing a gum, âand this is satoru gojo.âÂ
âHiâŠâ you said looking at him, before taking a look at those instruments laying behind.Â
Itâs you. It's really you. He couldn't believe his eyes yet stood unblinking as if you were some mirage and will fade away once he closes his eyelids.
âGojo?â Shoko waved a hand infront of his face and realizing he didn't respond to you, he bent his torso bowing to you.Â
âWoah,â shokoâs face scrunched up, cringing at his behavior, âwhen did you start being all formal?âÂ
You giggled at her comment while satoru hushed her with a series of âshut upsâ.Â
âI'mââÂ
âY/n.â satoru whispered almost as if reminding himself the way your name sounded in his lips. âY/n, i know.âÂ
You chuckle at his words, tugging a strand of hair behind your ear.Â
âYou know her?â shoko tilted her head at him, not expecting you to be acquainted with him.Â
âWe went to the same high school.â You say when satoru does nothing but gape at you with dreamy eyes.Â
His heart did a whole somersault at your sentence. You remembered him; you remembered his name; you remembered he was in the same high school as you. The fact that you regarded him made him so giddy that he was practically ready to throw his hands up in the air or kiss the floor on which you walk.
âKayâ I'll leave you guys to talk then.â She smirked before raising a cocky eyebrow at satoru, excusing herself from the club.Â
âSoâŠyou're the only one?âÂ
âHuh?â
âIn the bandâ i meanâŠâ
âOh noâ he dragged, âthere are two more members along with the back musiciansâŠâÂ
You humm, taking a proper look at the club.Â
âYou like it?âÂ
âIt has vibrant colours.âÂ
Your words echoed in his ears, the same which you said to him at the mall. Oh how bad had he wanted to hear those.
âThe jazzies,â you read the name of their band aloud, âwhy jazzies? You only play jazz?âÂ
âNoâŠwe play all sorts of musicâŠit's just a name suguru chose for the band.âÂ
âyou do originals?âÂ
âBoth originals and covers. Anything suguru comes up with.âÂ
Your mouth forms a little âoâ as satoru explains to you.Â
âgeto seems to be doing all the stuff, what do you do?âÂ
âYou know him?â satoruâs brows furrowed. âWhom?â you ask.
âgetoâŠgeto suguru.âÂ
âOfc, he was in the same class as us.âÂ
âOh.âÂ
Ofcourse. Both he and geto were in the same class as you. It was no big deal for you to remember both of them. However, accepting that he wasn't any special was bitter.Â
Satoruâs eyes followed your figure as you went out to reach for his guitar, mindlessly drawing your finger on its printed patterns.
âYou didn't answer my questionâŠâ
âI guess I found you for our band.âÂ
When none of you says anything, satoru breaks the ice, clearing his throat.
âYou know how to play?âÂ
âErrâŠno.âÂ
âI can teach you.âÂ
He slided his index among the few string instruments before pulling out an acoustic one, bringing it to you.Â
âHold the fretboard with your left hand,â satoru pulled the strap over your shoulders, âand bring your right hand over the body, fingers near the sound holeâ yep that's right,â he turned your back to him, gently holding the back of your palms.Â
âNow, pluck the chords for me,â his chest was against your back as he guided you through the strings.Â
âLike this?â you ask him.
âYes, you're doing very well.âÂ
The guitar in your hands, played smoothly as satoru guided you through it.Â
Just like when he taught you how to play mario kart.Â
Satoru looks down at you smiling in excitement. Oh how cute you looked like that. He could admire you twenty-four seven, never wanting to tear his gaze away, for you're that ineffably eesome in his eyes.Â
Time almost ceased when you looked up at him, eyes crinkling with a smile that soon died as red creeps up your cheeks.Â
Satoruâs face was mere inches away from you, his eyes wavering down to your lips.Â
âSATOâRUâ oh,â geto bursted in along with nanami causing you both to flinch.Â
He quickly leaves your hand.Â
âY/n??â Geto dragged out your name, looking at you with his eyebrows knitting and lips forming a silly smile.Â
âHi,â you pull the strap over your shoulders abandoning the instrument on the nearby couch. âI'm here to volunteer.âÂ
âYou do?âÂ
âYeahâŠâÂ
âThat's great! I can't believe satoru even managed to talkââ satoru smacked him mid sentence.Â
Nanami, for some reason, found the ceilings very interesting today, totally ignoring his two seniors.
Geto explained to you about their little tradition of hand drawn posters and showed you the posters they used for the last concerts. You, then, asked them to send them a group picture of the three and their preferences for colours and themes.Â
âFor that I might need your numberââÂ
âI- i can send it to herâŠâ Geto passed a suggestive smile at satoru, which he ignored and awkwardly forwarded his phone to you.Â
âYeah that sounds fine. Here's my number, save it and text me later.âÂ
âKky!âÂ
You pull the sling of your tote bag up to your arm, giving them a little nod, before turning your back to leave.Â
âWait!ââ satoru held your arms frantically pulling you back. He hurried to the back near the couch you plopped the guitar and shoved it to you. âT-take it.âÂ
âAhâ no I can't do that.â
âTake it. You can learn how to play and I- I can teach you.â he tried not to stutter yet failed miserably.Â
âNo i reaââ
âconsider it as a giftâ from me.âÂ
You frowned a bit but agreed anyway.Â
âThat's really sweet of you satoru! I will wait for your text! Bye!!âÂ
He waved back to you.Â
âWhat was that?â Geto implies in the direction of the exit door through which you just left.Â
ânothing.âÂ
Later, You sent the photo of the finished banner to satoru. It took you 42 hours to finish it.Â
Satoru on the other hand was practicing really hard, totally different from his half hearted performances from the previous ones which wasn't unnoticed by the other members.Â
He has to be the best. After all, this concert will be different from the previous ones. This time you will be there to see him, cheer for him, and notice him.Â
You soon bring the banner rolled up to the club. âWoah! You really did a great job.âÂ
âThis is much better than renâs.â says nanami before going back to his drum set, giving you a thumbs up.
âSatoru?âÂ
âY-yes.âÂ
âYou liked it?âÂ
âI loved it. It has vibrant colours.â You giggled at his answer, shifting your direction to his gaze. His fingers seemed to flake off any dust on the surface of your work, handling it so gently.Â
It wasn't his fault he felt so overwhelmed. All these years he'd yearned for one kind word from your lips yet he was left starving.Â
And now you'd drawn him with such precision, that it was as if you were accustomed to drawing him for the hundredth time.Â
His heart fluttered at the thought.Â
âI will be there at your concert,â you say, turning your back to him. âAll the best!âÂ
The campus stadium was full with a bunch of students and hippies, it was really hard for satoru to try locating you amongst the sea of crowds.Â
The music rang loud, brisking fiery cheers from the crowd, full of vim and vigor. The spotlight shone on the threeâ geto with his vocals and string of bass; satoru with his acoustic guitar; and nanami with his drum set.Â
The crowd roared in excitement as music coursed through their veins.Â
Will you be cheering too?Â
Satoru raised his head from the guitar, plucking chords effortlessly, to his audience.Â
And as if it was fate that drew both of you together, his eyes found yours. You were there in the vip section, along with shoko and another girl. You were moving with beats, swaying your arms in rhythm to their music.Â
His eyes locked in yours as you waved a hand at him. Oh how, how pretty you looked. Everything except you was a blur to him.Â
The crowd goes even more wild, seeing satoru blush, not sensing it was you who caused it.Â
The concert continued till past midnight as the vibrations thrumming around the air slowed and wrapped up with their ending song: âWhere Our Blue Is.â
As the applause slowly start to dissipate, satoru pulled off his instrument, running to the edge of the stage, and hopped down the raised platform.Â
The college girls shrieked baffled, some even reached out, grabbing on his wrists and clothes. He politely got out of their grip making his way to the vip section, geto and nanami following him.Â
The still air felt electric as he approached you.Â
âyou liked the show?âÂ
âOfc it was amazing!!â The girl beside you answers in your stead, whom he now recognised as yura.
âIt was really good.â you say swallowing a laugh bubbling up your throat at his huffed out appearance.Â
âThanks to your banner, it even attracted more audience.â geto remarked, placing his arm around satoruâs shoulders.
âThank you.âÂ
âYou should thank me for bringing her in.â Shoko reclaims, looping her hand around your arm, âlet's go steal some shots.âÂ
âOh no i can'tâ i don't drink. And I need to hurry back home it's late.âÂ
âKyaahhâ you've let me down y/nniee. Only two packets of cigarettes can get my mood uplifteââÂ
âI will bring it tomorrow.â You say shutting up her whines.Â
âkk bye and text me when you get home the rest are joining me right ?â
âCount me out. I'll be driving her home tonight.â Satoru says sheepishly, ignoring the smirks and exchanged looks of his bandmates, a slight blush creeping up his cheeks.
âNo but I was about to go home with her ââ yura interrupts.
âSatoruâs fine. You're coming with us.â Shoko dragged her along with geto and nanami, which satoru was glad of.Â
Finally he'd be alone with you.
He guided you to the parking lot from the back of the stage, before getting his car keys out.Â
It's metallic jingle echoing softly as he presses the button on his key fob. The car responds with a soft beep unlocking as satoru opens the passenger door, holding it open for you.Â
âHere,â he gestures with his other hand, âget in.âÂ
âSure.â You say gulping thickly.
The thick smell of your cologne mingling with the leather scent of the car.
He closes the door before sprinting to the other side, getting himself in. âDon'tâ â he stops you when you reach out for your seat belt. âAllow me the honorâ his finger brushes against your skin as he reaches out for the seat belt.Â
Your heart practically jolts at his action.Â
The click of the seat belt buckle echoes softly in the quiet car, as he straightens back to his former position.Â
âWhere do you live?â He clears his throat, starting the car engine and flicking on the headlights before pulling out the car into the driveway.Â
âIn the downtown.âÂ
âThat's quite far from the campus, how bout I drive you everyday back home?â His eyes suggestive, making you chuckle.
âI can't let you do that.â
âWhy?âÂ
âSince it's far from the campus and you won't be visiting often.âÂ
âWho knows, I might be visiting your place often.âÂ
You turn your face from the window to look at him.Â
âWhat?âÂ
âI will have toâ to teach you guitar.âÂ
You crack up at his silliness, finding yourself melting again.
âOkay fine. But that still doesn't counts.âÂ
âWhy not!âÂ
Since that day, satoru did visited you often, sometimes barging in with shoko and sometimes alone teaching you how to play guitar, plucking on chords and notes.Â
And you attended all of his concerts. Their previous artist has recovered now and has resumed his work, so you no longer work with them. However they insist you tag along each time and it's not like you complain.Â
You liked satoruâs company. He was handsome, charismatic and popular. You'd watched him your entire high school. He was the one of most popular students, good in a millions of things, starting from academics to being athletic. He'd win every sports competition and even participate in all the extracurriculars. You'd admired him for he could do the things which you didn't had the courage for.Â
You liked how he didn't judge people, helped them in their need, and even took care of those garish flowers nobody seemed to double take.
You'd previously met him before high school, though he never brought that up. You wondered if he even remembers the day at the mall. You wanted to ask him so bad, howeverâ
Your world was only limited to papers and paints.
So you painted.Â
You painted him so many times that you'd have more than five sketchbooks with paintings full of him.
You wanted to be friends, maybe even more than friends.
But that didn't matter now. He was near you and you would do anything to keep your thumping heart in control and not have satoru cut you out of his life.Â
But how can you?
How can you control it when satoru so gently, so lovingly, takes your hand in his. When he smiles so sweetly at you. When he teaches you how to pull chords and other instruments. When he drops you home from college almost everyday. When he hugs you and tells you to take care.Â
How are you supposed to be just friends when he's so overly affectionate to you?
Or maybe it's just your overthinking.
Satoru was always polite and sweet, he'd always been sweet to others and you were no special.Â
âWhat are you thinking baby?â
You come out of your daze, rolling your eyes at the nickname.
âHow many times do I have to tell you not to call me thatâŠâÂ
âNot my fault you aren't paying attention to meâŠâ he pulls you closer to him, resting his face on your shoulder.Â
âHave you always been this hungry for attention?â you ask, getting yourself comfortable abandoning the guitar beside you on the couchâ of the club.
âI've been starving.âÂ
You cringe at his words. Satoru has another concert today and they just finished practicing an hour ago and now they are taking a break.Â
Geto and nanami and other back artists wanted to get some fresh air so they left you and satoru alone to entertain each other.Â
âAre you really skipping on me?â He looked at you with puppy eyes.Â
âI've a gallery exhibition tomorrow.â You need to scoot back home to get ready for it. It's a big event for you to showcase your arts.Â
Satoru hummed, nuzzling his face on the crook of your neck, âI'll be there. You're going to do great.âÂ
An uncertain lump forms in your throat, hard to swallow, you say nothing. Your heart was in a conflict again, no matter what you can absolutely notâ
âI will be going then. All the best for your concert.âÂ
You push satoru away, reaching for your tote bag from the side of a random arm chair. âWait I will dropââÂ
âWho's leaving?â shoko barges in with yura and others.Â
Satoru points at you.Â
âI just got here. You can't leave already.â
âYup! Yup! Please stay a little longer, baby. I'll drop you back home, no worries.âÂ
Shoko exchanges suggestive glances with geto and they somehow persuade you to stay a little longer.
They start practicing for another round when shoko pulls your head closer, âwhat do you think about gojo?âÂ
âHuh?!â You shout over the music, unable to hear her.Â
She grabbed your hand and pulled you outside, with Yura following closely behind you both.
âWhatâ âÂ
âWhat do you think of gojo?âÂ
A burning sensation hits you slowly as shokoâs question registers in your mind.
You ears turn red.Â
âEhâŠum h-heâs a nice guy. A nice musicianâŠandââ
âAnd?â Shoko wiggled her brows at you, a sly smile on her face.Â
âA-a nice friend.âÂ
âJust a friend?â You nod at her, seemingly more embarrassed at her implications.Â
Shoko's face literally radiated disappointment. It was as if someone told her that cigarettes are now banned in the country. âI think he's interested in you,â you choked on air at her remark. âNo?âÂ
Yura shrugged.Â
The music slowed down and then paused, bringing your conversation to a momentary halt.Â
Satoru rushed outside, complaining about why you left in the middle of his practice.
âBruh, chill, I'm not trying to steal her away from you. We're just talking!â Shoko jokes as you laugh all flustered.Â
Just when you were about to leave one of his fangirls suddenly appeared from nowhere and threw herself into his arms, wrapping hers tightly around his neck. He stumbled back a step, surprised, before regaining his balance but he didn't put her down rather he spinned her around before setting her back down, with a polite smile on his face.Â
The other members just saw the scene unfold with amusement. Nanami was surprised at the fanâs boldness and geto simply observed the scene as shoko rolled her eyes, finding it hysterical.
âWhat do you think of shokoâs remark?â said yura, looping her hand around your arm.Â
âWhat?â You say suppressing the slow tinge of jealousy.Â
âAbout gojo being interested in youâŠâÂ
âI-i don't think so.âÂ
You try to laugh it off.
âYeah, he's just polite. To pretty much everyone.âÂ
Her words felt like a splinter to your heart. You shouldn't feel like this. It'd happened beforeâ not now again.Â
Yuraâs right, satoru is just polite and will do the same for everyone what he does for youâ because he's kind. And you're no special.
The entire ride was silent. Satoru kept asking you if anything was wrong but you just guised a smile at him, insisting it was nothing.
The next day at the gallery event, you behaved oddly. You smiled at him but didn't reach your eyes, your answers to his question were of one word, even avoiding his touch.Â
âDid I do something wrong?â he asked warily.
âNo.âÂ
Days passed by and you distanced yourself more from him.Â
Satoru, on the other hand, was almost losing his mind. His world turned upside down. You stopped coming to his concerts, ignored his texts and even refused to let him drop you back home.Â
It was yesterday youâd allowed him to teach you the guitar yet today you behaved as if you'd long forgotten him. You were cold and distant, leaving him puzzled by his own thoughts upon your sudden change in demeanor.Â
He couldn't help but wonder whether he'd done something that made you this upset?Â
You'd said it was nothing.
Then why?
What the fuck did he messed up?
Satoru missed you terribly and violently.
He eyed you from the inside of his car parked a bit far from your department. Today was another day you refused his offer to drive you to class. âI'm kinda sick so I won't be going.â This was what you'd texted him the morning and yet there you were getting off your uber.Â
You lied to him.Â
âCome with me to their concert today.â Shoko urged you, her lips pursed in a thin line.Â
âI'm sorryââ
âNo you're not so sorry. Tomorrowâs Saturday, come with me, gojoâs getting mad without you.â
You suck in a breath at the mention of his name.
âWhat's wrong?â shoko says sipping the last of her drink before plopping it on your tea table.Â
âNothing.âÂ
âThen come.â
You agreed eventually. Attending the concert won't be a big deal.Â
And it wasn't, except for satoruâs piercing gaze burning holes in your back. You accompanied Shoko backstage and casually greeted everyoneâ including him.Â
âGod, haven't seen you in so long.â geto side hugged you as nanami gave you a nod of acknowledgement before running off to the stage for some last minute preparations. âSatoru missed you like crazy.âÂ
You attempt a weak smile in satoru's direction, darting a hesitant glance his way. His gaze was fixed on you, but his expression was unreadable, almost giving shivers down your spine.Â
One of the other members suddenly hurried over to Geto, urgently speaking about some issue, he politely excused himself and exited the room, closely followed by Shoko. Now, you were left alone with Satoru, the only two remaining in the room.Â
âI should go and check what's the probleââ you try sprinting your way out the door, âwaitââ when satoru stops you.Â
His hand on your arm, preventing you to go any further and when you struggle to get out of his grip, he tightens his grip even more slamming you to the wall, pinning you caging your body.Â
âWhat's wrong with you?âÂ
âGojo you're hurting mââÂ
âGojo?â His voice cracked, grip losing before letting your arms go, âwhy? Why must you do this to me?âÂ
âDo what?â You drift your gaze away unable to look at satoru, who's this close tearing up.
âThisâ why must you do this? Why must you ignore me? Why must you be distant from me? Why must you lie to me so that I won't bother picking you up or dropping you home? Why must you reject my affection?â He sucks in a breath âYou know I can't live like thatââÂ
âwhy?âÂ
âDon't pretend like you don't knowâŠâÂ
âno no don't say it,â you throw your hands up in the air frantically, âdon'tâ I canât fall againâŠnoâ I know you're just being polite and you will do this for anyone, but I canât help it if I don'tââ
âI love youââ he whispers, bringing your hand up, placing the palm flat to his chest.
âNo you don't.âÂ
âYes I doâ what do you mean you can't fall again,â he suppresses your struggles of wrenching free your hand from his grip. âYou have no idea how crazy I'm for you. I love you and I've loved you since I was 17. I was about to confess to you on our graduation day but you just disappeared leaving me alone. And now that I have you I'm not letting you goâ make no mistake baby, if there's anyone Iâd ever kneel forâ it'd be you.âÂ
Thick silence covered the entire room, except your heavy exhales. Satoru gojo was inches close to you, your hand still laid flat against his heaving chest.Â
âB-but I wrote you a note confesââÂ
âWhat note? I neverâŠ.â confusion twisted on his face bitterly.Â
âYou threw it in the dustbinâ the one I wrote to you the day before graduation.â
His face told the truth, as he shook his head denying it. He never received any note from youâ nevertheless having the audacity to throw it in the trash when he'd been hopelessly in love with you all these years.
âYura told meââ you shut your mouth as the realization hits you. The person whom you considered as a friend backstabbed you long ago.Â
She lied about him discarding it while it was actually her who had stolen it off his desk before satoru even noticed.
Your head raised in embarrassment, ready to apologize for the misunderstanding when suddenly, Satoru's lips met yours in a tender kiss. The kiss was filled with such affection and tenderness that you felt as if you might melt in his embrace. His arms held you close, firmly yet gently, as he deepened the kiss. Your heart pounded in your chest as you responded to his kiss. All thoughts of the misunderstanding were forgotten in that moment of pure intimacy before satoru pulled away with frowned brows and a dazed smile.Â
âTell me, would I kiss anyone the same way I kiss you?â he pulled you again, smacking his lips on yours as he snaked a hand around your waist, the other, still firm, holding your palm.Â
You could feel his heartbeat going rapid the more he deepens the kiss, sucking on your upper lip.Â
He pulls away again.
âTell me, would my heart beat the same way as it beats around yours?â He smacks his lips again, this time pinching your waist making you gasp as he slips his tongue in.
His hand fumbles with the hem of your dress, pulling away again, a string of drool connecting both of your lips. âWould I be breathless the same way as I'm now?âÂ
His hand travels up your inner thigh, till it reaches the wet blotch of drenched silk. You grasp his shoulders, when he starts drawing circles over the fabric, smirking before nuzzling his face on the crook of your neck.Â
âSatoru, what if someone walks inââ your body jolts, nails digging into his back as he pulls the fabric to the side, plunging a digit in without any warning. âLet themâŠâ he goes back to sucking your skin while rubbing his thumb over your swollen clit.Â
Your teeth sank on your bottom lips, his finger slowly plunging in and out of you. âNngh âtoru, youâreââ small trembles quivered through your body as he plunged with a faster rhythm.Â
âShh baby! Let me take youâ he inserts another digit as your teeth dug even deeper into your lip, stretching you and filling you so well.Â
He was stroking you, curling his fingers inside until hitting your most sensitive spot. Sweat beaded your forehead as your trembles gave way to full body shudders, shutting your mouth with your hand not wanting to be loud.Â
Satoru drew himself back from your neck, satisfied marking and suckling, withdrawing his digits, slick from you as you wince at the loss of his fullness.Â
He brings them up and sucks your essence off his fingers with a pop. âI want to eat you out.âÂ
Before even you can make out his words he kneels down bunching up the fabric to your hips pulling your panty down properly and latching onto your swollen clit.Â
âFuck âtoru.â he lapped his tongue on your clit, drawing circles, tasting your sweet before drawing himself back, âI am fucking you baby.â He says, licking a fat stripe on your vulva, his rigid tongue swiping back and forth over your clit sending sensations that make your body jolt. âHere and rawâ he hummed against your pussy, his breath warm and hot sending vibrations to your core, before vacuuming on your clit.Â
Your hand grasping his hair, as he worked on your orgasm.
He plunged his digits again, rhythmatic with the little pants escaping your mouth, along with the slick sounds of your hips buckling down his fingers.Â
He smirked internally at your enthusiasm.
âSo fucking nasty for me huh?â He said against your pussy, licking and sucking till you were nothing but withering in mindless pleasure. You were taking it well, suppressing your moans into breathless pants until he sucked, fingers pressing the most sensitive spot inside you.Â
A shriek fell past your lips, knees buckling, followed by a string of moans and whimpers. âOhâ fuck..â you try closing your thighs which he prevents with his iron grip of one hand, forcing it open till he has better access. âDon't even dare closing on meâŠâÂ
The wet sounds of his fingers, plunging in and out of your gummy walls, echoed throughout the empty room.
Something coiled hot and fuzzy in the lower pit of your stomach. You clenched hard around his finger, when the bass-heavy beats of the band's concert began, causing you to involuntarily shove satoruâs face deeper into your cunt as you heard voices from the stage outside.Â
Geto's unmistakable voice rang out, accompanied by the heavy drumming of nanami. They had started performing without satoru.Â
âNnâtoru they startââ your voice died down into a breathless gasp as you felt your pelvic muscles clench, tension looping around your entire body as fiery sensations erupted. You arch your back against the wall, unable to stop your toes curling at the intensity of his tongue lapping, finger fuckin' you, as your vision gets blurry.Â
âYeahâŠcum for me babyâ his velvety murmurs were all it took for you to turn into a mess of sensations, your body erupting as your high came down bursting, dripping and spilling down your thighs, his chin and his neck.Â
Satoru lapped up the drops carelessly strewn about your skin, his tongue tracing a path along the droplets splattered on your inner thighs as he savored everything with anticipation.
âTell me, would I kneel infront of anyone and let them cum this hard on my fingers?â He straightened himself up, âand then drink it up like a pussy drunk male whore?â his gaze never left yours, wiping the leftover slick from his chin with the back of his hand before licking it clean.
The music from outside has now gained its intensity, thrumming even louder.
Noâ you mouthed.Â
Satoruâs gaze was still fixed at you, when he unzipped his pants, his aching cock sprang out red, already leaking precum.Â
You gape at his girth.Â
It was big.
And fucking thick.Â
Leaning in, Satoru brings his lips close to your ear, his voice clear over the blaring music from outside, âLike what you seeââ
You didn't get to answer him before he slammed right in.Â
A cry of pleasure tore from your throat, as you loop your hands around his neck, nails digging on his back.
He hissed out a breath, restraining himself from moving till you adjusted to his size.Â
Only then did he slowly pull it out leaving only the tip inside. You grimace at the loss of fullness until he slams back in causing you to clench around him.Â
He let out a low guttural moan which was almost inaudible to you over the roar of music if you weren't so close to each other, feeling the raw desire of his voice vibrating on your skin.
âTell meâ hahh- would I let anyone clench this hard on me if this weren't you?âÂ
You were at a loss for words.Â
The kind, polite, sweet satoru you knew was gone. In his place was someone who fucked hard.Â
When you don't answer he pulls out and slams right back in harsh, eyes gleaming with wicked intent.Â
Satisfied, satoru guides his one hand to tapping on your thigh suggesting you wrap your legs up around him.Â
He repositions his dick on your entrance, before supporting your weight with one hand, pinning your body completely to the wall, while the other hand grabs your neck, choking you before giving you a sloppy breathless kiss.Â
âYou like it don't yaâ hmm fuckâ so tightââÂ
Your cries came out choked as he pounded into you, in an insane manner, desperate and primal.
âTell meââÂ
ThrustÂ
âdo youââÂ
ThrustÂ
âstill think I'm just being polite?â
Thrust.
The roar of geto's voice singing out aloud different notes masked out the filth of your moans.Â
The sensation was in again, hot and uproar, coiling beneath the core of your consciousness. Satoru sensed you being close to your climax, continued to plow into your pussy, now supporting your weight with both hands against the wall.Â
Your toes curled again, nails digging down his back almost scratching the fabric, âyes that's it love,â your eyes rolled back as you arch your neck unable to handle the pleasure, âcum for meâŠâÂ
Your mouth forming a little âoâ, mind blank as your eyes saw stars. The only consciousness left in your body directed you to the burning of your heat, till it came crashing down.
You came hard letting your head fall on his shoulders too spent for anything.
Satoru too chased his high, thrusting into your swollen pussy, his cock twitching inside you, till you felt him getting sloppy and tense before cumming into you.
The music was still very loud, beats thrumming your flushed veins.Â
None of you said anything, remaining in the same position. Satoru pulled himself out, his cum dripping out your vagina, before walking over and placing you on a nearby chair.Â
He cleaned you up gently tugging your clothes back and fixes himself before cleaning the mess near the wall.Â
âTheyâ they started performing without youâŠâ you huff out, drained still in the very euphoria of your pleasure satoru showed you.Â
âI told them to do soâŠâ he shouted over the noise.Â
You remain stunned for a while, letting out a breath. âI'm sorryâŠI avoided you.âÂ
âHere I thought you were giving me a thousand kisses as an apology.âÂ
You chuckle at him, back to his normal selfâ your sweet, kind and maybe not so polite satoruâŠ
He came over to you, lifting you effortlessly before plopping himself down on the chair with you on his lap.Â
âI missed you.âÂ
âI missed you too.âÂ
âNo but I missed you like crazyâŠâ he pouted. ây/n be my girlfriendâŠplease.âÂ
Tears start forming in your eyes, overwhelmed, you never thought the satoru gojo you met at the mall, the satoru gojo you loved your entire high school would someday ask you to be his girlfriend.
To paint his heart with your love.
âI will.âÂ
âno waitâ marry me instead!â
You dug your face deeper into his chest, laughing at his playfulness. And satoru just smiled.
Finally he would be yours.Â
you and Satoru started dating since then and things couldn't have been any better for him. He practically announced to the world that you were his girlfriend, always picking you up and dropping you off from campus, and claiming a kiss as his reward. Youâd also cut Yura off, not wanting any more negativity in your life. Satoru was yours, and you were his. And He couldn't be any happier.
Tags: @cccandynecklaces @secretfankoala
© strawberrymochin 24 | plagiarism won't be tolerated |
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it was always you.
for as long as you remember, youâve always had the fattest crush on your childhood friend, jeon jungkook. it never blossomed into something more though, because thatâs what happens when life naturally takes it courseâyou grow up, you move on, and you pretend that those feelings never existed in order to maintain the good friendship that remained between the two of you over the years.
so when he visits you after work one day, asking you to marry him, you do everything you can to refuse, because the reason heâs asking you isnât due to the fact that he finally realized that he loved you after all this time, but because he thinks heâs doing you a big favor.
or at least, thatâs what you think.
pairing: jungkook x reader
word count: 13.2k
rating: 18+
content: fluff, semi-angst, childhood friends to lovers au, pining au | ft. naval aviator!jungkook + brotherâs best friend!jungkook; professor!reader + editor!reader | inspired by purple hearts
warning/s: swearing, potentially wrong medical & military information (iâm sorry but i tried to do as much research i can đ), mentions of having type 1 diabetes, making out, heavy petting, implied sexual content: oral (f. receiving), fingering, penetrative sex, unprotected sex (this is only fiction!)
MINI PLAYLIST: â« die with a smile â lady gaga, bruno mars â« juno â sabrina carpenter â« selfish â *nsync â« nandito na ako â benj pangilinan, angela ken
opening note. omg this is my first full length fic in two damn years i think??? certainly took a long time before i had the motivation to write again but i hope y'all like this! to my og readers who still keep up with my shenanigans, this one's for you đ„čđ
âAny questions?â
A boy wearing half-rimmed glasses raises his hand and you gesture for him to speak. âCan we get an extension on the Save the Cat project due tomorrow?â
You sigh, just as several of your students begin agreeing with him and muttering reasons of their own why the extension should be approved. Itâs the week before finals, and youâre aware that the class must be packed with assignments and projects for several of their classes because of it, hence the rather last minute request. They look tired and pleading, a complete reflection of how you were when you were the one in their position nearly a decade ago, begging for an extension from a professor who you thought was kind enough to be swayed with the proposition.
You scan the crowd. âHow many of you are at least 70% with it, hm?â
More than half of the class raises their hands.
âOkay, thatâs honestly unexpected,â you say, pleased to know that they arenât slacking on your subject. âDoes Monday sound good? Thatâs three more days, to be fair. I donât want to extend it further because I have to read everyoneâs work and you guys know I donât like rushing it before turning in your final grade.â
A chorus of relief and thanks echoed in the room, all of your students either dramatically sinking in their chair or erupting in an animated conversation with their seatmate or making crying faces to portray how grateful they are.
âThank you so much, Ms. ____!â
âI love you, Ms. ____!â
âMs. ____, I will offer my first child to you,â one theatrically adds and you smile a bit, rolling your eyes at students like this one who is now opting to flatter you way too much for your act of kindness.
âAlright, alright. Just get it done and Iâm expecting quality work, okay? Class dismissed.â
The whole class begins to gather their things at the cue and you donât stay there a minute longer after your announcement, exiting the lecture hall to head to the faculty room where youâre certain half of the teaching staff have gone home already. Itâs already 8:47 p.m., and all you want to do is head home to get the rest you deserve after an eventful day.
There was a time that having a schedule from 6 p.m. to 9 p.m. wasnât the norm for you. You used to value work life balance so muchâit was even a nonnegotiable you used to say in interviews, saying that if you didnât get enough rest within the week, then the job most likely wasnât for you. But things have been very different for the past months; you have definitely grown out of that mindset due to the fact that youâre simply in need of another source of income to pay for your monthly rent, utility bills, and now your medication. Youâre in a stage of your life wherein you consider working part time as a professor was a blessing rather than a big nuisance.
Making a right turn to where the hallway to the faculty room is, youâre too busy rearranging the papers inside the folder youâre holding to notice a man sitting on the bench placed just beside the entrance. He notices you the second you appear in his line of vision though; he straightens his posture and proceeds on standing up immediately upon seeing you closer, calling your name softly when you failed to look at his direction, too preoccupied with the thought of finally coming home that youâre oblivious that the man trying to catch your attention is Jeon Jungkook.
â____,â he calls again and this time you notice him, your eyes widening instantly.
âHoly shiââ You stop yourself from finishing that sentence. âJungkook?â
He grins. âHey, lamb chop.â
âWhat the hell are you doing here?â
âIs that how you greet an old friend?â
âOh, fuck off.â
He laughs, following suit to you whoâs already giggling just by his presence alone, outstretching his arms then. âYou gonna hug me or what?â
You beam and step forward to embrace him. He returns it without hesitation, muscular arms circling around you and squeezing tightly that it lifts you up from the ground for a quick second. The faint smell of fabric conditioner on his clothes enters your nostrils and you feel like a teenager again, warmth rushing to your face while your heart hammers loudly in your chest. Regardless of how old the both of you are, you think your hopeless crush on the guy will forever live on and constantly transform you into a middle school girl whenever opportunities like these to have him near arise. Youâre just happy youâve trained yourself to be better at hiding it now compared to when you were younger.
âArenât you supposed to be in base or wherever it is that youâre designated?â you ask, the first to let go from the hug.
âActually, I returned from deployment three days ago. Iâm on leave for two weeks.â
âWow. Two weeks, huh?â
âYep. Itâs the longest break Iâve gotten in a while.â
âThatâs good. Everybody needs a break from time to time.â
âSays the girl has a day job and a night job.â He points out with a smirk; your heart does a little leap at how handsome he looks doing that. âWhen the hell did you get into teaching, by the way? I never pegged you to be the kind who can tolerate it. You hate kids.â
âYouâll find yourself tolerating lots of things in this economy.â You snort. âAnd my students arenât kids. Theyâre in college.â
âYeah, which you graduated from six years ago. Still technically kids.â
âAre you seriously jabbing at my age when youâre two years older than I am?â
He rolls his eyes at that one, an indication that you won the argument. âAnyway,â he starts again and you grin, âI didnât come here to compare how old we areââ
âYou didnât?â
He sends you a look. Your grin gets even wider.
âIâm here because I was hoping to treat you to dinner.â
âDinner?â you repeat, not masking the surprise from your voice.
Letâs get the facts straight before we proceed to this conversation.
It isnât a lie when you say that you and Jungkook are great friends. You have been since you were 7 and your family just moved into the house next to theirs. He was a natural playmate, a companion when you couldnât tolerate the antics of your older brother, the boy who looked out for you aside from said older brother, and the person youâve shared significant history with throughout your youth that you can never seem to forget nor disregard.
Itâs just that you never deemed that you were great enough friends for him to go out of his way and visit you at your workplace, offering to treat you for dinner. Gestures like that were reserved for your older brother, Seowon, whoâs the same age as he is and who youâre sure is considered as his best friend. Compared to them, yours and Jungkookâs dynamic shifted slightly after graduating from college. What once was a really close friendship turned into a casual one, with mostly just teasing, light talks, and the occasional welfare checks at times you hear certain news from the other thatâs worth speaking directly about.
At the mention of that, realization dawns on you on why he must be here.
âJungkookâŠâ Youâre trying not to sound mad but you canât hide the exasperation from your voice. âThatâs not the real reason youâre here.â
âOf course, it is. Why else would I be here?â
âHe told you, didnât he?â you ask, not willing to drag this out. âYouâre just going to give me another lecture that I definitely donât need.â
Jungkook frowns, like heâs dismayed that you caught on pretty swiftly.
âIâm right, arenât I?â You pressed.
âHe meant well, ____.â
You scowl. To remark that Seowon is unnecessarily nosy and coddling would be an understatement. That man hasnât left you alone the second he was aware of your condition. Usually, whenever he gets into his âbig brother tendenciesâ, his girlfriend Winnie steps in and helps you lay him off your back. However, itâs different this time; no matter how much you reinstill your independence and insist that youâre fine, itâs like youâre talking to a wall.
âWhat exactly did you hear from him?â you query.
He seems hesitant in answering that. âThat you got diagnosed with type 1 diabetes.â
You wince.
âLook,â he steps forward towards you, âI wasnât going to bring it up unless you did, okay? Iâm just here because Iâm genuinely worried about you and I want to know how youâre doing.â
âIâm fine.â You murmur. âYou donât need to worry.â
âWorry doesnât vanish magically just because someone says so.â
âWell, it shouldâbecause Iâm fine.â
âYou sure? I heard that youâre struggling to buy insulin among other things youâre having a hard time paying.â
âFuck. Seowon told you that too? Thatâs private.â
âMy parents know. He just filled me in because he wants you to have as much support as you can get.â
âI donât need that. Iâm an adult. Iâve lived by myself for years. I can fend for myself just fine.â
âIt doesnât look like it from what Iâve been hearing.â
âAll youâre hearing is a warped and exaggerated version of the story told by Seowon who wonât listen to a word I say.â You huff. âIâm fine and Iâve been doing everything I can, alright? Iâm taking care of myself. Iâm going to the doctor whenever I need to. Iâm making ends meet, buying treatment for this goddamn disease and regulating my sugar levels all the fucking time. Why do you think Iâve been working two jobs for the past year? Itâs because Iâm doing everything I can to stay alive.â
Jungkook doesnât reply, he only remains gazing at you.
âIf youâre here to offer me money or whatever because of what he said,â you add, already embarrassed that you canât even look at him anymore, âthen I donât want it.â
âThatâs not what Iâm here for,â he says.
âThen are you really just here to treat me to dinner?â you question sarcastically.
He laughs and you dare return your eyes at him, catching him peering at you with a fond expression. âYes. Itâs my way of doing a welfare check.â
âWelfare check.â You echo with squinted eyes. âWell, in that case, here I amâalive and healthy.â
âI can see that, and Iâm glad.â He smiles. âBut I need more than just seeing you. I need a conversation and an apology.â
âAn apology?â
âFor being the last person to know about your condition.â
âAnd weâre still talking about that apparently.â You mutter under your breath. âSorry. I didnât think that you wanted to know.â
âOf course, I would have wanted to know. Itâs you weâre talking about here.â
Something about how he said you causes your lips to twitch as you fight off a smile. This isnât a good time to dive into your romantic feelings for your childhood crush, but when heâs letting go of lines like that which are sure to have your heart soaring out of your chest, itâs hard to keep on a cool and unfazed facade. You just convince yourself that he sees you as a little sister and thatâs why heâs so worried; you should already be past your âdeluluâ phase at this age to be affected by such statements.
âI didnât want to add to your worries,â you reason. âYou already have your life to think about. Add to the fact that youâre a naval aviatorâso you literally have your own life first to think about.â
âI can make space for you.â
Is he flirting? Is this a normal thing to say between friends?
You blink. âOkay, uh, thatâs⊠thatâs completely up to you, I guess.â
âI just like knowing those things first hand. It makes me worry less.â
âGot it. Next time I learn Iâm dying, Iâll tell you.â
â____,â he says your name in warning, and you know heâs serious.
âSorry.â You heat up. âI couldnât resist.â
âDonât be a pain in the ass.â
âI promise thatâll be the last time I make a dark joke, Lieutenant.â
Jungkookâs nostrils flare. You prevent yourself from grinning like a fool again in success of getting on his nerves.
âAre you done here? Because Iâm hungry and would really like to get going now.â He changes the subject and gestures to the faculty.
âYeah. Iâll just get my things and then I can get out of here.â
âGreat. Youâre letting me take you to dinner, right?âÂ
âDo I have a choice?â
âNo.â
âFine.â You deadpan.
This time, heâs the one whoâs beaming at you. âIâll wait for you here and we can go.â
âOkay.â
****
When Jungkook discovered that you had type 1 diabetes through a phone call with Seowon, he spent the rest of the night staring at the ceiling, ignoring the snores of his squadmates and overthinking whatâs supposed to happen to you now that you had an autoimmune disease which he was told didnât have a cure. He was assured that you were okay despite it, that there was medication to treat it, and that you had access to them and have been very careful with your lifestyle due to the diagnosis ever since.
He still couldnât be put to ease though. As ridiculous as it may sound, he had this overwhelming realization that life truly was short, that you had to make certain decisions all the time because you need to adjust to what the universe is only willing to give you. It was funny coming from a person who risked his life for a living. He thinks that perhaps he never understood the philosophy of the quote âtime is goldâ until he had a loved one on the same trajectory, always one step closer to possible death.
And so that same night, he decided to file a leave for two weeks, effective immediately after his deployment.Â
He wasnât sure what his game plan was exactly in filing that two-week leave. Was he supposed to barge in your life and force you to let him take care of you? Was he supposed to demand why you ended up having diabetes? Was he supposed to act as a big brother like your actual big brother because he was that worried about you? But if Jungkook was going to be truthful, he already had an idea on what he wanted to do in the back of his headâhe just didnât want to execute it because it was absolutely insane.
Until he heard Seowon suggest it himself when they met up at a bar to share a drink together.
âShe would never say yes,â Jungkook said, beyond doubt that you wonât be persuaded that easily with a plan like that.
Seowon made a face. âI know. That girl is so hyper independentâsheâd rather die than accept help.â He scoffed. âShe needs it though. Itâll help with her medication and she wonât have to pay rent for that shit apartment sheâs living in. Plus, she'll actually get the chance to take care of her body if sheâs not juggling two jobs to have sufficient income.â
âYouâre right.â Jungkook shrugged.
âYouâll do it then?â
He took a sip of his beer. âYeah. Iâd do anything for ____, you know that.â
âEven as crazy as marrying her?â
âSure.â
Seowon stared at him, narrowing his eyes and morphing his expression into a teasing one. âAre you sure youâre not just considering this because itâs a perfect excuse to marry my sister? I know you like her.â
âI donât like her.âÂ
âYouâre in love with her.â
âI donâtââ Jungkook began to deny but Seowon was staring him down. âFuck you, man. Donât make me some kind of pervert whoâs trying to lock her into marriage because he likes her. Youâre the one who brought the idea up.â
Seowon laughed out loud. âI know, I just canât believe youâd agree. Itâll benefit ____, thatâs for sureâyou, on the other hand? Itâs career suicide.â
He shrugged. âIâm okay with the thought that sheâll be okay.â
âBecause you love her, man.â Seowon pushed. âWhy on earth would you consider this if you werenât? Itâs a fraudulent marriage. Youâll be thrown in the brig and be dishonorably discharged if you get caught.â
âWe donât even know if sheâll agree to this whole thing. You said it yourself, she would never say yes.â
âYeah, unless maybe youâre the one who tries to persuade her.â
âMe?â
âYes.â
âDo you want me to buy her a ring and kneel down before her or something?â
âThat can work.â
âWhat?â Jungkook laughed.
Seowon raised an eyebrow. âDonât tell me you donât know how sheâs been crushing on you since we were kids.â
He barked out a laugh again. That he knew; it was impossible not to when a lot of friends and cousins kept on teasing you before, especially at instances Jungkook was in the very same vicinity. âWeâre not kids anymore and I barely see her though.â
âStill, it ought to count to something. It raises the chances of her agreeing.â
âYouâre really cool with me marrying your sister, Won?â Jungkook asked.
Seowon placed down the beer bottle heâs consuming on the counter. âYeah. Youâre a good guy. Youâre not perfect, but I know you enough to know that you wonât do anything that will purposely hurt her. Besides, if this sham marriage ends up to be a real relationship and then for some reason, you fuck up and decide to break her heartâIâll easily know what to do, where to find you, and then Iâll do everything I can to fuck you up.â
Jungkook pressed his lips together to stifle a chuckle.
âNoted.â
****
Itâs always been a big wonder to you how no matter how long itâs been since you saw each other, it still feels like no time has passed between you and Jungkook. You think thatâs why you can never get over him; he always had this comforting and familiar aura that you appreciateâsomething that you sought for in every other person that you liked. Maybe it was impractical, maybe it was the reason you can never hold a relationship for more than two years, but unless you gain the courage to confront your feelings and tell Jungkook about it, then you constantly dispel any doubts you might have whether this was good for you or not.
You donât want to lose him. Admitting that you harbored romantic feelings for him would just make it awkward for everyone: your brother, your family, and then his family. You donât think you can ever trade his smile, the sound of his laughter, and all the good things about him for anything in the world.Â
âAre you dating anyone?â he asks.
You choke on your drink, having just poured yourself and Jungkook a glass of water after the server arrived with the pitcher. Youâre in a Japanese restaurant near the university, aware that the cuisine was a favorite for the both of you hence why itâs what you recommended when he asked where you wanted to dine. The place is packed with people from the workforce and students; youâre thankful that you donât see any of your students within the mix.
âWeâre getting straight to it, huh?â you say.
Jungkook smirks. âIâm just making sure Iâm not upsetting a boyfriend by meeting you tonight.â
âDonât worry, youâre not upsetting anyone.â
He nods in understanding. You donât want to add more meaning to his actions for the evening but he seems glad about the information.
âHow about you?â you ask back. âAre you dating anyone?â
The ends of his mouth lift a bit upwards. âNope.â
âWhy? You donât have the time for it?â
âPrecisely.â
âIt must be really hard dating when youâre in the Navy then.â
âKinda. Weâre away a lot and stationed in different places most of the time. It can get really dangerous for us too and people donât like the stress that comes with that.â
 You bob. âDoes it get lonely?â
âSometimes, but when youâre on duty, you donât get to think about those things.â He chuckles. âBesides, I donât know if this sounds fucked up or notâbut it can get exciting. Flying a plane can be fun, you know. Not to mention that it helps when youâre surrounded by good men in your squadron.â
âYouâve always been an adrenaline junkie.â
âAnd youâve always been a scaredy-cat.â
You scoff at the declaration. âNo, Iâm not.â
âRemember when Seowon and I forced you to ride that ship in the amusement park that sways left to right and as it goes on it falls from a higher standpoint?â
âI donât know what youâre talking about.â
But you do, and Jungkook knows you do, itâs evident by how your expression is trying to feign innocence. That memory is your villain origin story; the whole pretext of why you refuse to ever visit the amusement park or ride an exhilarating ride again. Yet you canât help but recall that itâs one of the rare instances wherein you got to hold Jungkookâs hand when you two were younger, as his hand was the one you were clinging for dear life when it happened while the other was too busy slapping Seowon in irritation.
He snickers, appearing like heâs replaying the scene in his head. âWe should do that again with Seowon during my break.â
âHell no.â
âI thought you werenât a scaredy-cat?â He challenges.
âIâm not.â You give him a kittenish glare. âBut I am busy. I have to send the final manuscript of this book Iâm editing to the chief editor next week and itâs about to be finals week for my students as well.â
He fakes a shiver. âI donât know how you can do two jobs like that, ____. Truly.â
âYou work as a naval aviator so Iâd say weâre pretty even.â
The waiter arrives with your orders not long after, and you and Jungkook carry on with your conversation, jumping from topic to topic without difficulty. Youâre not certain when was the last time you saw each other like this to have so much to talk aboutâwas it last Christmas? Or was it more recent or longer than that? Nevertheless, it feels good and you find yourself blushing multiple times throughout the night, whether itâs because of how his words can have two meanings or how his eyes are staring at you so intensely whenever youâre the one whoâs talking.
You like the undivided attention, the back and forth thatâs occurring as you discourse, the subtle touches one of you does when something funny arises, how your knees are touching underneath the table. You wonder whatâs so different with this encounter that the energy feels so bizarre in a good way? As far as youâre concerned, youâre positive that youâre acting like you always have in his presenceâlively, smiley, sarcasticâand aside from the little touches of flirting here and there, Jungkookâs acting like he always has too.
When dinner was done, Jungkook offered to drive you home. You obliged, no longer in the mood to annoy him for you were tired to make the effort. Before stepping outside the restaurant however, you excused yourself to the restroom first, checking your blood sugar with the glucose meter you brought along wherever you went. Itâs a hassle but itâs necessary, largely because youâre still in the middle of saving up for the insulin pump that would help you regulate your sugar levels easier.
After administering yourself with the insulin injection you have, you spend a few more seconds inside the enclosed room. You should be past the point of feeling sorry for yourself, but itâs times like this wherein youâre with a loved one that the dejection hits and you wish that youâre in a better predicament than you are right now. Youâre close to being broke, youâre overworked, youâre somehow fatigued all the fucking timeâthose factors arenât soothing your worries at all. Itâs a miracle how you manage to keep an optimistic mind amidst everything.
âReady to go?â Jungkook smiles at you once youâre back at the table and you nod, clutching your bag tighter against your body and following him to his car.
He drives you to your place, turning the radio on, and letting it play while the both of you sit in silence. Youâre both tired and you almost even sleep during the ride. Itâs only when Jungkook gently shakes you awake that you realize that youâve arrived in front of your apartment building.
âIâll walk you up,â he insists as youâre unbuckling the seatbelt.Â
âThatâs no need, Kook.â
âOf course, it is,â he says. âIâll walk you up. Thatâs nonnegotiable.â
So, you allow him.
It takes five minutes tops to reach the door leading to your apartment. As you rummage through your bag to grab your keys, Jungkook patiently stands there, occasionally glancing around the hallway and even smiling when the old lady that resided in the same floor got out of her room to throw out the trash. He receives a smile in return which you notice and grin fondly at.
âWell, this is me.â You turn to him, done unlocking your door. âIâd invite you inside but you should probably get going. Itâs quite a long drive back home.â
âYeah.â He breathes out a chuckle. âHey, tonight was fun. It made me realize how I missed you.â
Your brain temporarily malfunctions; you force yourself to recover quickly. âMe too. I had fun tonight. Maybe we should do this again whenever youâre on a break.â
âAgreed.â
You flash him a smile. âYou can go now. Goodnight.â
Jungkook nods, however doesnât move a muscle. Heâs looking at you, like really looking at you, his eyes moving from one feature to another, as if heâs memorizing your face or having a hard time arranging the words he wants to say. You guess itâs the latter, familiar with a tongue-tied Jungkook that it takes you a few good seconds before youâre demanding why heâs impersonating a mannequin.
âThereâs something I want to say,â thatâs what he utters and you almost snort due to your assumption being right.
âOkayâŠâ The smile is still on your lips. âWhat is it?â
âPromise me you wonât get mad first.â
âWell, if youâre making me promise that then itâs probably worth being mad about.â
âItâs not as bad as you think.â
âThatâs not convincing at all.â
âItâs justâŠâ He begins and trails, biting his lower lip, âitâs⊠itâs why I went here. Why I went here to see and meet you, I mean.â
You unconsciously recoil at the revelation. Itâs certainly a rookie mistake to believe that there was no ulterior motive in Jungkook meeting you today. You just didnât reckon youâd actually be truly disappointed at thatâat the idea that he just didnât randomly decide to visit and be with you earlier until now.
You draw a long breath. âWell, I knew you werenât just feeling generous and wanted to treat me to dinner out of nowhere.â
Thereâs a pause and then he resumes. âJustâbefore I say it, you have to hear me out, okay? You have to let me explain before you berate me.â
âI canât promise that either.â
âYou have to.â
âWhy do I have to?â
âBecause what Iâm about to say is for your own sake. You know I always have your best interest at heart, donât you?â
You wrinkle your forehead in further confusion. âCan you just get on with it? The vagueness is making me more annoyed.â
âI just donât want you to misunderstand.â
âMisunderstand what?â
âWhat Iâand Seowonâgenuinely think is the best option.â
âOh, and Seowon is in on this too?â You bellow. âHave you and Seowon just been conspiring behind my back the whole time?â
âCalm down.â Jungkook puts his hands on your shoulders, a chuckle inevitably escaping him. âIâm sorry for dragging it out. You should know Iâm high key afraid of you, thatâs why.â
âYou should be.â You grumble.
Another chuckle, but heâs back to appearing anxious. You want to shout that this isnât healthy, that youâre close to giving him a real reason to be afraid of youâyet once he blurts the confession out, youâre speechless, gawking at him and staggering backwards in complete shock. Perhaps you would have bolted as far away from him as possible if not for his solid grasp.
âWhat?â You hiss.
He swallows hard.
âI want you to marry me, ____.â
You donât bolt away running. You shake off his hold on you though, and before he gets another word in, youâre hastily rushing inside your apartment and slamming the door to his face.
****
Jungkook was your first kiss.
It happened in a game of truth and dare. You were at a party of a mutual friend and when the bottle miserably pointed in Jungkookâs direction, the person who was tasked to think of his dare when it was his pick said that he dared him to do 7 minutes in heaven with you.Â
He profusely refused at first, especially since Seowon was in the same party, but everybody began booing and next thing you know, Jungkook was agreeing as long as it was fine with you. When you nodded to make your consent apparent, your friends were quick to shove you both in the closet, some of them pulling Seowon back who was complaining how it wasnât right to bully you into doing 7 minutes in heaven with Jungkook. They calmed him down once they bullied him into agreeing too.
âWe donât have to do anything,â Jungkook told you in the darkness, his breath fawning over your face. âYou donât have to feel pressured. Itâs just a stupid game.â
You blushed.
Secretly, you were hoping that heâd kiss you or touch you. Who didnât want to do anything with their crush at the age of 15? A lot can happen in 7 minutes. You were aware that sometimes people made out, went as far as third base, and although you didnât want to go that far with Jungkook, you wanted something to happen while you were stuck in this small closet with him. There werenât a lot of instances that put both of you in this kind of situation; you wished that you were brave enough to ask him to kiss you or do the first move yourself.
5 minutes in, Jungkook turned towards you.
âIs it true that Taehyung kissed you last week?â
You whipped your head so fast that you might have given yourself whiplash. âThatâsâthatâs not true. Where did you hear that?â
âDuring homeroom. Some girls were talking about it.â
Your cheeks burned. âOh.â
âSo, itâs not true?â
âNo.â You shook your head. âI havenât even had my first kiss yet.â You laughed weakly.
It was his turn to seem stunned. âYou havenât had your first kiss yet?â
You shook your head again, then realized he might not see you doing so. âNot yet.â
âWant me to change that?â he asked, grinning.
He said that with a boyish grin and teasing tone, but you sucked at social cues (plus, you really couldnât see shit that much) that you started nodding.
âOkay,â you told him.
âHuh?â
âYou can kiss me.â
âOh, oh, shitâI didnâtââ He was blabbering, about to take back what he offered. âI mean, I was just joking butââ
You widen your eyes. âYou were? Oh my God, Iâm sorry, I thought you wereââ
âNo, it was my fault. That was a little out of line for me. Iâm sorry.â He was laughing and you felt like burying yourself 6 feet under. âIt was a stupid thing to say. But if you want me to kiss you, itâs cool.â
âIt is?â Hope sparked within you.
âYeah. Itâll just be a peck anyway.â You can tell he was smiling through his voice. âJust donât tell Seowon because he might punch me in the face for kissing his sister.â
You cackled. âDeal.â
56 seconds before the 7 minutes were up, Jungkook leaned down to match your level and placed his lips on yours.Â
****
Youâre seething with rage, the embodiment of Godzilla, channeling the God of War, Ares, in your body; you harshly press Seowonâs number on your phone to call him and he answers after three rings.
âWhatâs up?â
âI will fucking murder you,â you snarl.
A beat. You hear shuffling. Then he answers, âyou already talked with Jungkook?â
The nonchalance and calmness in his voice drives you to be more frustrated than you already are. âYes, I have! What is wrong with you? Why would you plant that idea on his head?â You yell, not caring that your walls are thin and that your voice can probably be heard by the couple that lived next door. Youâre feeling a mixture of anger, embarrassment, and every negative emotion that exists at the moment. Youâre comparable to a bull who just saw the color red.
â____, it wonât be a big deal if you donât make it to be.â
âAre you hearing yourself right now?â
âDid you even let Jungkook explain?â
âI donât need him to spell everything out. I know why heâs asking me to marry him.â
âThen you know too that itâd be good for you.â
âMarrying him wonât be good for me.â
âWhy not?â
âIt just wonât!â
âYouâll get health insurance benefits that you donât get with your current jobs. You can pay less rent once you move in at Jungkookâs placeâthereâs a huge chance he wonât even let you pay him while you stay there too. Heâs away most of the time anyway, so staying there wouldnât be a problem. Plus, you can start studying for a masters degree like youâve always wanted.â
You groan. âNot like this. This is crazy.â
âThe both of you can divorce once youâve saved up a little. It really isnât that complicated.â
âItâs a sham marriage!â
âItâs a sham marriage with Jungkook.â
âThat doesnât make it better.â
âAre you sure? Your grade school diary might disagree.â
âOh my God, thatâs fucking low of you to bring that up. You just gave me another reason to hate you.â You stomp around the living room, acting like a teenager because of your brotherâs behavior. This isnât the first time he revealed that heâs read your diary before; that doesnât mean itâs less infuriating to be reminded that he has. âI swear, you better fucking sleeping with one eye open tonight. Iâm choking you to death.â
Seowon laughs out loud. âJust marry him. Heâs surprisingly amicable with the idea.â
âThatâs because youâre pressuring him! I bet you and Mom devised this entire thing together.â
âMom doesnât know. To be fair, sheâd probably have the same reaction as you. Itâs all me and Jungkook.â
âWow. You have two brains and yet none of you thought this was goddamn stupid?â
âItâs not stupid. Itâs genius if you come to think of it,â he says. âJungkook just wants to help you, dude. He wants to make sure youâll be okay and all that shit. Youâre the reason he filed for a two-week leave, did he tell you?â
Your heart does that jumping thing again. âNo.â
âWell, he did. Heâs on a break for two weeks because he wants to convince you to marry him and actually marry you within that time frame.â
âThis is nuts.â You sigh, finally flopping down the sofa and rubbing your face with your free hand. âThe both of you are nuts. How are you okay with this?â
âItâs Jungkook. I trust him. Donât you?â
âOf course, I do, I justââ you cut yourself off and frown, âI just feel like itâs unfair for him. Iâm marrying him because of military spouse benefits and what does he get?â
Thereâs a long pause, and you almost check your phone to see whether Seowon has already hung up on you or not.
âItâs better that Jungkook answers that question,â he tells you finally.
âWhy? You canât answer it on behalf of him?â
âSomething like that.â You can imagine him shrugging. âAll I know is that heâs genuinely concerned about your health and your financial status right now. So, just think about it, okay?â
âGod, fuck it, fine. Iâll think about it.â You grimace.
You hang up and glance at the door.
You donât think the conversation you just had with Seowon took that much time. The initial rush you had upon having your longtime crush propose to you is wearing off and youâre realizing that it was a dick move to literally slam the door right in Jungkookâs face earlier, leading you to stand up from your seat and look through the peephole to check if heâs still there.
He isnât, which you sigh in relief at.
As you lean against the door and regulate your breathing, you think how funny it is that Seowon is right about one thingâand that was grade school you would have been delighted at the thought of getting married to Jungkook. Heâs your dream guy; your parents loved him, his parents loved you, the both of you got along very well, and his personality and looks are everything that youâre looking for in a partner. It sucks that you live in a world where the only reason he wants to marry you is because heâs afraid youâll die because of self-neglect.Â
Your phone pings and you unlock the screen to look at the message that flashes on it.
Jungkook: hey, seowon just messaged me to say that you two already talked Jungkook: iâm sorry for jumping on you with a topic like that⊠Jungkook: iâm shit at confrontation lol Jungkook: also itâs the first time iâm proposing so give me some slack
You scoff at his audacity to joke about it this soon.
You: itâs okay You: iâm sorry too for what i did You: the answer is no btw
Jungkook: already??? Jungkook: letâs talk about it first
You: no need You: i donât want to marry you
Jungkook: oof thatâs harsh
You: sorry not sorry?
He doesnât respond and you think youâre safe. Maybe Jungkook does take no for an answer and youâre confused because youâre a little disappointed that heâs not falling on his knees, begging you to marry him like what your imagination is supplying you.
However, after you took a shower and went to check your phone again, you see that Jungkook messaged you a few minutes ago in response to your last message.
Jungkook: give me 10 days and iâll change your mind
You have the urge to go take a shower again because of how hot your body is feeling at the statement.
You: hate to break it to you but youâre not matthew mcconaughey
Jungkook: đ€Łđ€Łđ€Ł
****
Itâs not part of Jungkookâs branding to chase a woman. Typically, women chase him; they chase him in every city and country that he gets stationed in, flirting with him and hoping that theyâll get the chance to take him home for the night for a mindblowing one-night stand. They never succeed though, for despite their pretty faces and sultry gestures, Jungkook only smiles and declines every offer, saying that he had a girl waiting back home that he loved very much.
He used to think that he only used that as an excuse because heâs not the type to hook up with every attractive girl he meets. There are times when he succumbs, when he gives into the temptation of a little fun, especially after a life threatening or highly stressful missionâbut most of the time, he thinks he declines and use that pronouncement of his because his mind reverts him to the idea of you, to what would happen if he just gained the balls to ask you out.
Evidently, although asking you out and asking you to marry him are two completely different things, heâs a bit afraid that your answer will always be a hard no. Itâs what youâve been literally spelling out to him since the day he presented the idea, regardless of how heâs trying his best in swooning you or explaining how this is the perfect plan to help you gain an upper hand with your diagnosis.
âIâll file a restraining order against you, Iâm serious,â you say to him when he appears yet again outside the faculty room, waiting for you to gather your things and head home. Youâre wearing a white button up shirt and pinstripe wide leg trousers, an outfit combination that he ogles at before he goes down to business.
âYou wouldnât.â He glares at you. He gestures for you to let him take your backpack, and despite what you said, you let him. âAlso, what the fuck is in this thing? Youâll break your back if you keep using this.â He swings your backpack on one shoulder.
You laugh. âMy laptop, its charger, a couple of notebooks, books, pens, then the outputs of my students.â
âArenât they supposed to submit virtually? What happened to Google Classroom?â
âI still use it, but sometimes I like to have their work printed out so I can write the comments better. How do you know Google Classroom?â
âI have a squadronmate whose kid uses it for class.â
âAh.â You nod in understanding.
You two continue walking forward.
This has been your program for the past few days. Jungkook goes to the university you work at, heâll wait outside, youâll threaten him with something ridiculous, heâll take your bag, heâll offer to take you to dinner, youâll decline, and then heâll drive you home anyways. Before that routine ends, heâll lean on your door frame and give you his best puppy eyes, asking you to marry him for the sake of your welfare, and youâll scowl at him, insisting that you donât need his help to survive.
âDinner?â he asks, right on schedule.
You glance at him. âNo. I want to go home and sleep for 12 hours.â
âBusy day?â
âYep.â
âYou know, if you marry me, you wonât have to work two jobs and overexert yourself.â
He doesnât need to turn to you to know that youâre giving him a dirty look. âI wonât marry you, Jungkook.â
âWhy not?â
âBecause marriage doesnât work that way.â
âIt does. Billionaires do it all the time. The mafia does it too. Itâs always been some kind of transaction.â
âWell, if I marry you, what do you get?â
âThe assurance youâre taken care of.â
âThatâs cheesy.â
You share a laugh and he grins.
âItâs true,â he says. âIâll be fine as long as you are.â
He waits for you to quip back a reply, flickering his eyes to you when it takes longer than usual. Instead of the sneer heâs expecting, you appear to be flustered, an expression that is very recognizable for him whoâs known you since foreverâan expression that makes it too obvious for Jungkook that the crush you had on him that he thought has been long gone was still there. Heâs been seeing it a lot lately, particularly when heâs uttering lines that sound flirtatious on purpose; heâs positive that youâll threaten to kill him when you discover that he basks on the fact that he can still make you all flustered and cute, which encourages him to do and say anything that would elicit a reaction from you. Was it unethical to seduce you into marrying him? He might have to rethink that part too.
Reaching the parking lot, he unlocks the doors to his vehicle and places your bag inside the backseat. He watches you walk around the car, about to go to the passengerâs side, but then you wobble a bit and his attempt to get inside is instantly forgotten.
âHey,â he strides to where you are, gazing at you as you now hold onto the hood, âyou alright?â
You raise your chin up. âKook, can you get my bag?â
Jungkook doesnât need to be told twice. Heâs swinging the door again and getting your bag from the other end of the backseat while you get on the passengerâs seat, keeping the door wide and placing your legs outside, your feet planted on the concrete.
âWhat do you need?â he asks, crouching in front of you and zipping the bag open.
âGlucometer.â
He halts. âWhat does that look like?â
âItâs in the yellow bag. There.â You point at it right when he rummages through a certain part.
He brings it out and you take it from his grasp. Your movements are sluggish but he can discern that youâre doing your best not to be too slow; heâd present to help but he knows that he might prolong what youâre doing due to his cluelessness, so he just observes, noting how youâre pricking your finger with a device and then pressing it lightly to the glucometer which shows that your blood sugar is low.
âApple juice,â you mutter to him and he finds it faster than the last one.
You grab the juice pouch from his grasp, prying the straw attached on the back, pushing its end for it to pop out of its plastic coverâthen your hand shakes, preventing you from continuing and punching in the straw properly.
âLet me do it,â he says.
You donât fight him, you just slump against the seat as Jungkook picks up from where you left, and the moment he does the job and guides the straw to your awaiting lips, a long exhale through your nose escapes you.
âHow are you feeling?â he whispers. He didnât notice that he was holding his breath the entire duration of the scene.
Another sigh. âBetter.â
âDoes this happen a lot?â
You seem to hesitate. âNot a lot. Just when life gets a bit too hectic.â
â____ââ
âJust take me home.â You donât give him the chance to lecture you. âPlease, Jungkook.â
Defeated, he nods. âAlright.â
âThank you.â
He helps you position yourself properly on the passengerâs seat. âBut weâre talking about this at your place.â
Before you can protest, he closes the door.
****
Lee Hyunwoo was the name of the guy that you brought home for Christmas Eve eight years ago. It was the first time that you did, and Jungkook hated how Hyunwoo was considerably handsome, intelligent, and kindâthe exact kind of person he always imagined you deserved.
In the short time Hyunwoo spent with theirs and your family that night, everybody loved him and was already inviting him to the next gathering, all the while Jungkook avoided him at every cost, puzzled by this strong dislike he was feeling for your guest. He was annoyed at the manner in which Hyunwoo had an arm around your waist the entire evening, how you grinned up to him, eyes sparkling and all that shit. Hell, you used to look at him like that.
âHoney, can you get the mango float we have in our freezer?â Jungkook heard your mother tell you, and without thinking, he stood up from his chair and made a beeline to where you were, telling you heâd accompany you to your house.
âThatâs fine,â you told him. âItâs literally next door.â
âYeah, but it might be heavy.â
âItâs not.â
âBetter safe than sorry.â
You rolled your eyes and agreed then, excusing yourself from Hyunwoo who was in an engaged conversation with Seowon. The pair were geeking out because of their mutual love for the MCU and the next film slated to be released the following year.
Upon arriving at your home, you dashed to the kitchen with Jungkook trudging behind you. He wasnât sure what his next course of action should be now; all he wanted was some alone time with you, away from the presence of that college boyfriend of yours, but now that he had that, he couldnât think of anything that he wanted to say or do. He wasnât even sure why he was feeling a bit jealousâwas it because of that saying? Wherein people are bound to want what they canât have? Or was it that you only appreciate what you had when youâve already lost it?
âHow long have you and Hyunwoo been dating?â he asked, leaning against the counter as you pulled your freezer open.
âFour months, I think.â
âFour months? And you already brought him home?â
You snorted at his tone. âHis family is in another country so I thought itâd be nice to invite him.â
âYou must really like him then.â
âYeah, but Iâm not in love with him or anything.â You placed the mango float on the space beside Jungkook on the counter. âHeâs nice, and he likes me too.â
âDoes he treat you well?â
You flashed your eyes at him, amusement dancing in them. âWhatâs with that question?â
âWhatâs with it?â
âNothing, itâs just thatâŠâ you trailed, a smirk etched on your face. âWait a minute, are you⊠you canât possiblyââ Jungkook was widening his eyes, ready to deny your accusation once you questioned whether he was jealous of Hyunwoo or notâ âare you pulling an overprotective brother skit on me, Kook?â
Fuck, thank God, he thought.
âI prefer âoverprotective friend skitâ,â he said.
âThat doesnât have a nice ring to it.â
âBut Iâm not your brother.â
âYou donât have to be, Iâm just saying that you and Seowon have been acting similar since Hyunwoo and I arrived.â
âNonsense. Seowon likes him.â
âOh, so you donât?â
He pressed his lips into a tight line.
âDid you just admit that you donât like Hyunwoo?â you asked, chuckling. He was grateful that you didnât seem to be offended by it.
âI didnât say I didnât like him.â
âInstead you implied it.â
âNo, I didnât.â
âYou kinda did.â
He heard you laugh and he couldnât help but allow himself to laugh as well.
âIâm sorry,â he apologized. âMaybe Iâm just not used to you dating anyone. You are chronically single.â
âCanât say youâre wrong.â You snorted and picked up from the mango float, marching back to his house and gesturing for him to follow you.
He did, no words spoken between the both of you once more. Though when you were entering their place again, with Jungkook holding the door open for you, he mentioned something he never reckoned heâd have the guts to mention out loud.
âWhen you open my gift,â he began, âdonât do it in front of Hyunwoo, okay?â
âWhy not?â You werenât paying attention to where you were going, intrigued by his warning.
âHe might not like it. Youâll see.â
That night, at the comfort of your bedroom, Hyunwoo nowhere near but instead sleeping at the coach downstairs in your living room, you opened Jungkookâs gift and saw that it was a necklace with your birth flower as its pendant.
You smiled, rolling your eyes to yourself, and slept with that giddy look never leaving your face.
****
âNot so fast,â Jungkook grunts.
Did he think that you were going to be less difficult since he was helpful earlier? Yeah, he did. He likes to think that if it wasnât for him, you would have taken longer in feeding yourself with apple juice, so he at least wanted a thank you in the form of your willingness to have an adult conversation with him tonight. However, that clearly isnât the case because when he walked you up to your apartment like he always did, youâre attempting to lock him out, shutting the door as fast as you can once youâre inside, thus trying to prevent him from initiating that talk he wanted the two of you to have.
âSeriously?â He successfully pries the door open and you scowl at him.
âJungkookââ
âNo, you donât get to reason your way out of this. Iâm done hearing you out. Itâs your turn to listen to me.â He steps inside your apartment.
You groan, striding to the sofa and throwing your bag there. âYou canât force me to marry you.â
âIs marrying me so fucking bad that you canât get over it for health insurance benefits that can really help you?â He demands, infuriated.Â
âThatâs not the issue.â
âThen what is?â
âYou can get arrested!â you exclaim. âAnd so can I! Does that not freak you out?â
âWeâll only get arrested if we get caught.â
âIâm not willing to take the risk.â
âIâm not willing to see you die.â
You scoff out a laugh. âWho the fuck said anything about dying? Iâm not dying.â
âYou almost passed out on me. You almostââ
âItâs an error on my part, I admit.â You sigh. âWhen I get busy and preoccupied, sometimes I forget to check my sugar levels regularly throughout the day. Iâm sorry.â
âAnd you expect to be convinced that you have everything handled?â
âGod, Iâm not a child. Stop treating me like I canât do shit for myself.â
âPlease, ___,â he approaches you with the most pleading expression he can muster, and he watches as your hard expression crumbles, âjust accept my help. Itâs really not a big dealâyou wonât even see me often, so keeping up with the whole marriage ploy wouldnât be difficult. Weâll divorce in two years, we can pretend we never got married after that.â
âYou just donât get it, donât you?â
âWhat do I not get? If you think I donât understand something, then explain it to meââ
âI canât marry you,â you say. You do so like itâs final, like thereâs no point in arguing with you because he can never change your stand on this. As heâs pleading with his eyes to urge you to agree, youâre communicating with your eyes in a similar way thatâs wishing he would just drop this. âItâs wrong.â
His eyebrows furrow. âThis isnât the time to go on your high horse and decide whatâs wrong and whatâs not. Itâs a fraudulent marriageâof course, itâll be wrong to some degree.â
âNo, I meanâŠâ You turn away from him, rubbing your face in exhaustion. âItâd be wrong of me to marry you. Iâm taking advantage of you if I do, and I donât like that.â
Jungkook shakes his head, frustration worsening at the childlike excuse. Surely, you werenât that naive, were you? âYouâre not. Iâm not doing this against my own will. Besides, we get extra pay just for being married. If it makes you feel better, I wonât split it with you.â
âThat wonât make me feel better.â
âThen what will?â
You flop down on the coach and lean back, closing your eyes. He knows heâs being a pain in the ass but he canât just stand here and do nothing. He thinks heâs already come too far in convincing you, he isnât going to back out now. Every single day spent together, he can feel you warming up to the idea of marrying him for health insurance. Your connection and entirety of your relationship has been off the charts recently that itâll be harder for him not to be assured that before he leaves for his job, youâll be taken care off.
Jungkook goes to the spot beside you, sitting down. Your knees bump together, he keeps on gazing at you, waiting for you to focus on him; a minute passes and his gaze moves to your hand thatâs laying on the small space between you.
Without overthinking, he stretches out and clasps it, allowing his fingers to play with yours that finally captures your attention. The moment he glances up, he sees that youâre staring at him and he doesnât let go, he even smiles, a quiet promise that heâs always willing to listen to whatever you want to tell him.
You hesitantly smile back. âYou know,â your eyes train back to your intertwined fingers, Jungkook reveling in the warmth of your skin, gaining more confidence in acting out his feelings, âthere was a time wherein I would have said yes immediately if you asked me to marry you.â
He smirks, canât deny how hearing that inflates his ego a bit although this route in the conversation isnât where he expected to go. âWhat changed?â
âFor one, I grew up.â
âOuch.â
You laugh. Then you stay quiet for a while before speaking. âCan I confess something?â
That piques his interest. âAnything.â
âBut you have to promise not to make fun of me.â
âThatâs impossible.â He teases. âWhat is it?â
You stall, readjusting your position so that you can directly face him. Jungkook doesnât let go of your hand, he keeps it in his grasp, his thumb rubbing along the expanse of your knuckles.
âI like you, Jungkook. I really really do,â you finally say and he blinks, startled.
It shouldnât surprise him, considering that itâs been long established that he knew of your crush already, though he doesnât seem to have anticipated for you to boldly admit it when all these years, itâs only been some kind of unspoken understanding that neither of you downright acknowledged.
You continue speaking. âIn fact, I like you so much that maybe it developed into love at some pointâIâm not sure. Iâm at this stage of no longer being afraid of what I feel, I think? Most of the time, I just let it occur like itâs something so natural. Like itâs a feeling that I can never get away from? Like whatever I do, thereâs no way to shake you.â You chuckle half-heartedly. âThough never in a million years would I have thought that Iâd confess all of this. What for anyway? I donât want you to be burdened with what my teenage heart couldnât rub out.â
His mind is racing; hundred thoughts, hundred scenarios, hundred experiences heâs spent with you since the day you met. Jungkook never realized how much he needed you to say that you liked himâthat maybe you even loved himâuntil he heard it from your very mouth that you did, causing every inhibition and doubt he had to vanish. Now, he only wants to engulf you in an embrace and shout Yes, I feel the same way! Sorry for being a fucking corward and not doing this first!
He would have done all of that in a flash if it didnât appear that you still had something to say. Based on your rather constipated posture and the hand heâs holding thatâs becoming clammy, he discerns that youâre just in the first part of what you wanted to admit.
âActually, thatâs also why I canât let myself marry you,â you say. âI know it sounds ridiculous, but I donât know⊠it feels really icky somehow. I feel like Iâm holding you hostage, or that Iâm tricking you because of an ulterior motive, or that Iâm defying the laws of the universe by having the chance to marry you. Iâm not sure. I just know that I donât want to marry you if it means Iâll only get to do so because you think youâre doing me a huge favor. I donât want to be your charity case, KookâI deserve to be more than that, you know? Iâm not traditional or whatever but if itâs not for love, Iâm not keen on getting married.â You abruptly pull away from his clutch, embarrassment washing on your features by what you stated. âPlus, two years might not be that long but what happens when you meet someone and you like her? How can you explain that youâre only married to me because I need it for my medication? Itâll just be unnecessarily messy. I donât want to hold you back from those kinds of things. I donât want to be a hindrance.â
Thatâs his cue. Thatâs when he knows heâs supposed to kiss you and take your breath away, to admit that heâs certain that he has loved you since that one time when he was in the Naval Academy and although the training was hard as fuck, the thought of you gave him strength and he didnât want to see anyone as much as he wanted to see you afterâthat when you and Seowon visited him, that familiar urge to have you alone was all he felt the entire time, solidifying the idea that perhaps he didnât just see you as a friend.
âYouâre unbelievably dense, ___,â he murmurs, smirking at the play of events, and you glance at him, expression showing disbelief that heâs somehow treating this matter lightly.
âWhat?â
âDo you honestly think I go around and offer marriage to every woman out there who can benefit from being a military spouse? Do you think Iâm that generous? Iâm not. I wouldnât ask anyone to marry me for the same reason if they werenât important to meâor if I didnât like them. Iâm not that much of a saint,â he adds. âI mean, Iâm taking a two-week break to convince you to marry me. Iâm spending time with you every single day. Iâm driving for almost an hour and a half, enduring the traffic to get from my apartment to the university you work in to do thatâand you think this is because I want to be charitable?â
Silence. Your forehead wrinkles. He thinks youâre still not getting the point.
âIâm in love with you, ____,â Jungkook says.
Your breath hitches in your throat. Youâre opening your mouth, then closing it, then opening it again, then pressing it into a thin line. He thinks you look cute, being taken aback like this, and heâs wishing that heâs done this sooner so that the last five days of him chasing you around like a lost puppy was spent with talking more about whatâs possibly waiting for yours and his relationship next.
âAre you serious?â you ask after what seems like forever. âOr are you just saying that because youâre that desperate to have me on board with the whole fraudulent marriage thing?â
âGodââ Heâs inching closer to you now, laughing, watching your lips twitch at his reactionâ âIâm convinced that you were born into this earth to drive me fucking crazy.â
And just like that, he no longer restrains himself from kissing you.
It takes you a few good seconds before you will yourself to move. You canât seem to process the reality of Jungkook admitting that he was in love with you and then taking the liberty to plant his lips on yours. Youâre not complaining, of course, but you are a bit overwhelmed that it literally makes you freeze, unaware of what youâre supposed to do now that your fantasies are coming into life.
However, once you feel him angle his head to the side, doing so to deepen the kiss, your reflexes kick in and youâre kissing him back, encircling your arms around his neck and leaning towards him, Jungkook sighing in what appears to be relief. He grips your hips to support you as you try to straddle him, but your movements are so clumsy that you end up sprawling against his chest instead, perched on a leg of his that provides pleasure on the spot you need him the most. He chuckles at your lack of gracefulness, gliding his lips to your cheek and down to your jaw, nipping.
âThis okay?â he whispers with a palm drifting to your bottom.
You nod and Jungkookâs mouth is back on yours in an instant. He squeezes your ass, takes his time in fondling with it, cheekily slapping whenever you get brave yourself and push your tongue past his lips, before he skims his hand lower to your thigh and signals for you to mount him. Upon being properly sat on his lap, you get an immediate feel of his hard length through his jeans, prompting your imagination to run wild and induce the filthiest things he can do to you if neither of you stops.
âHoly shit,â he curses, your kisses roaming to the base of his throat where you lap and suck.
It becomes a dirty pattern for a while. The both of you will take a brief pause from making out to remove a piece of clothing or kiss every other exposed skin there is: the cheek, the jaw, the neck, the collarbones, the shoulders. Then one of you hauls the other back for another passionate kiss, hands skating everywhere on your bodies, sounds of arousal echoing inside the room; youâre starting to get lightheaded but youâre positive itâs not because of your sugar levels running low.
âI hate that it took us so long to get to this point,â he mutters.
You grin. âIâm sorry.â
âDonât apologize. Iâm the manâI should have confessed long ago.â
âWhy didnât you?â
âI donât know. âWas afraid to lose you, I guess.â He draws his head back and admires your blissed out expression. âBut then when Seowon told me you had diabetes, I panicked and thought that I might lose you either way.â
You go back to making out, Jungkook guiding your hips in grinding on his clothed length. Itâs addictiveâthe intimate feel of him, how heâs not shy in making sure you know how much heâs craving to be as close to you as you are to him. You think you can spend the whole night just doing this and be okay with it.
âFuck, Kook,â you groan against his mouth, a hand descending to his stomach and to his manhood, âyouâre so⊠so fuckinâ hard.â
Youâre palming him now, tracing the erection evident under his boxers.
He lets out a grunt. âYeah, baby, I know.â
âDo you⊠do you want meââ Youâre breathless, not able to continue whatever it is that you want to say.
He understands you just fine though. âNo.â He shakes his head. âDonât do anything.â
Youâre not sure what Jungkook means by that. How are you supposed to do nothing when you want to do everything to him? You soon comprehend what he means when he guides you to lay down on the sofa, when his lips skim lower and lower, passing your breasts, giving them the attention they deserve, until he goes lower than that and discards your underwear, kissing you in between your legs.
Itâs like heâs releasing all the pent up emotions heâs been keeping all these years. His tongue and fingers are relentless, his voice is telling you that heâs eager to coax an orgasm out of you, and as he lifts himself up to return to his previous position, face hovering yours, youâre positive that heâll get everything he wants because without a doubt youâll give him everything he wants from you too. Hell, if he uses this opportunity to ask you to marry him again, you might answer yes straight away, no longer bearing in mind the worries you expressed to him earlier.
Although did that even matter anymore? Jungkook said he loved you. He said you drove him crazy. You never thought youâd come to see the day heâd utter those words but here you are. The man of your dreams is kissing you, pleasing you, and looking damn enthusiastic as he does all of that.
âLast chance to stop me,â Jungkook teases. His eyes are glassy and you can feel his cock nudging on your thigh.
You giggle, bringing his head closer to press another long kiss on those pink and plump lips of his. âPlease never stop.â
âNever?â
âNever.â
âIâm going to take you up on that.â
âPlease do.â
After this night, youâre certain that youâll never allow yourself to be with another man aside from Jungkook. At the back of your head, you always thought that you were his, regardless if that wasnât true or that there was no real relationship to prove thatâhowever, at this moment, as he thrusts in and out languidly, you unquestionably know that you are. You belong to him now and he belongs to you; he lets you know through his love-filled gaze, his passionate kisses, and the manner wherein he moans your name.
âI love you,â he says, like heâs still in deep longing for your touch and affection.
You hum, tangling your fingers through the strands of his hair. âI love you, Kook.â You stare at his eyes. âI canât remember a time I didnât.â
A boyish grin erupts on his features.
Time passes by quickly. In a few more of his kisses, of the intoxicating slam of his hips, of his seductive whimpers, youâre coming beneath him, Jungkook pulling out and jerking his length until he too comes, his seed landing on the base of your tummy. You have the nerve to giggle at that, grinning at him with low-lidded eyes, and Jungkook hastily wipes his cum off your skin, attacking you with another passionate kiss that leaves you breathless.
âThereâs no way youâre not marrying me after this,â he murmurs.
You teasingly graze your teeth on his bottom lip. âIâll think about it.â
He groans. âDonât think about it. Just say yes.â
âAt least let me sleep on it, Kook.â
âFuckâfine.â He grabs your sides and pulls you flush against his body. âGuess Iâll have to keep on convincing you until you agree.â
****
âGod, why is this so difficult?â Jungkook whines, keeping you in his embrace, head tucked between your cheek and shoulder.
The air is very humid and Jungkookâs in his naval aviator uniform, which doesnât look cool in a sense that air is properly flowing through the material. He doesnât care though, doesnât care that itâs sticking to his skin as he refuses to let you go, not even when you complain playfully.
âKook, Iâm fucking sweaty.â
âI donât care.â
You laugh.Â
Heâs leaving to return to his duty and youâre here with him outside the base before he enters, being with him until the last possible minute because thatâs how much of a good wife you are.
Yes, you and Jungkook did get married. Three days ago in fact, at the city hallâs courtroom. Neither of you invited your parents; they didnât know about the occasion and you refused to tell them, afraid that they may be critical about yours and his choices when they discover the true reason why youâre rushing to be wed. The only people that remained to be aware of it was Seowon and his girlfriend, Winnie, who served as the witnesses, which was fine by you. In your understanding, this was just for the papers and your health, and not the real deal yet to be celebrated lavishly.
âIâll propose to you again after a couple of years,â Jungkook promised after the ceremony. âLetâs renew our vows and Iâll give you an amazing wedding.â
You would have told him that there was no need, but who were you kidding? You did want a proper wedding with Jungkook. The previous week didnât even feel like you were newlyweds. Yes, the both of you compacted all of the dates you could have if one of you werenât such a chicken in five days, and yes, though the honeymoon stage was experienced and practicedâit was only because you were a new couple who after years of hiding their feelings for one another, was now finally free to express it as much as they desired.
âCall me everyday?â you ask when he finally pulls back, Jungkook pecking your lips one more time.
âDefinitely.â He smiles. âVisit me whenever possible?â
âOf course.â You kiss him too.
His smile transforms into a grin. âTake care of yourself, alright? Keep me updated all the time. No sugarcoating allowed.â
âYes, Lieutenant.â
Rolling his eyes, he gives you another kiss and engulfs you in a tight hug, lifting you off the ground that causes you to giggle.
âOkay, pack it up, love birds!â Seowon shouts.
The two of you turn to your brother whoâs leaning on his car, the vehicle that was used to transport the three of you today. Youâre still in the middle of moving your belongings at Jungkookâs place and Seowon was kind enough to volunteer helping, always dubious that you could do stuff on your own. Despite your reluctance, you let him assist you, mostly because youâre trying to make a conscious effort in not upsetting him again.
Letâs just say that when the judge hailed you husband and wife at the civil wedding, Seowon wasnât thrilled to see that the kiss shared between you and Jungkook wasnât as fake as the supposed sham marriage, leading him to the conclusion that in the middle of Jungkookâs ruse of convincing you to be his wife, something must have happened that led to your approval and that rather 18+ rated kiss. Mostly though, heâs just offended that neither of you thought of telling him that you were an official couple before the wedding.
Jungkook unwillingly places you down.
âI think I need to go,â you say.
He nods with a sigh. âIâll miss you.â
âIâll miss you too.â
âCall you tomorrow?â
âYes.â You affectionately caress his cheek, bringing his face down for the very very very last kiss.Â
He leans into it. âFuck, I donât want to leave.â
âSeriouslyâhurry up!â Seowon shouts and you pull back.
âI will kill him,â you tell Jungkook.
âHeâs your brother,â he says. âAnd now, my brother-in-law, so I canât let you do that.â
âThat might be your very first red flag, Jungkook, insinuating that youâre choosing my brother over me.â You cross your arms. âTell me, if the both of us were drowning, would you save me or Seowon?â
âYou,â he answers without missing a beat.
You narrow your eyes. âIs that the truth?â
âOf course. Seowon would probably undrown himself anyway and youâre shit at swimming. Itâs an easy choice.â
You punch him hard on the shoulder and he feigns hurt, snickering. âFor the record, I donât think anyone can âundrownâ themselvesâbut fine, you pass the test.â
Jungkook faces Seowonâs direction and does a final salute, your brother returning it swiftly, and just like that, you and him share your last farewells. You watch as he goes through the entrance of the base and sends you a wave of goodbye; you weakly copy the gesture and stand there for a few seconds, just watching him fade from your view the further he trudges inside. You donât think saying goodbye to him ever felt this heavy, and you blame it on the fact that after all this is the first time youâre saying goodbye to him with the assurance that he loves you tooâand that alone weighs millions.
You spin on your heel and go to Seowon whoâs already in the driverâs seat. As soon as you get in and wear your seat belt, heâs giving you a dirty look.
âWhat?â you ask.
âPlease never do that in front of me again.â
His statement makes you smirk. âWhy? Didnât you want this?â
âWant what?â
âMe and Jungkook to be together.â
âWhen on earth did I say that?â
âYou previously admitted that you were lowkey playing cupid by suggesting that Jungkook marry me for health insurance.â
A short pause. âYeah, but that doesnât mean I have to watch you two reenact a porno every fucking time.â
âWeâre notââ
âYou are. Donât deny it.â He grumbles. âGod, every time I see you two, itâs like Iâm Ross from that one Friends episode where he accidentally sees Monica and Chandler doing it from the window of his apartment.â
âYeah, I remember that.â You laugh. âIn my defense, you havenât seen me and Jungkook actually do the deed soââ
âWait, so the two of you have?â
Your expression drops. His tone is approaching older brother protectiveness territory and youâre quick to attempt diffusing the situation. âI will not dive into that. All Iâm going to say is that Iâm a grown adult and so is Jungkook.â
He grimaces before starting the engine. âYeah, never dive into that. I donât need to hear the details.â
You share a laugh and then silence fills the car.
You press your lips together, looking at him while he backs out from the parking spot. âHey, thanks, by the way. For driving today, and for offering to help me later, and maybe for also never minding your own business.â
You recall how Seowon was the one who couldnât stop worrying about you and finding a solution when you told your family that you had type 1 diabetes. Your parents were concerned, they pestered you for months to force you to accept financial assistance from them, but they gave up soon after. Seowon though? He never did. He persisted through every outburst you had; he tolerated your bitchiness and your dirty looks all the time. Out of everyone in your life, you always felt like regardless of how stubborn and prideful you could be, Seowon was worseâin the best way possible.
A crooked smile illuminates his face. âYouâre my kid sister. Itâs my job to never let you experience peace in your whole life.â
You scoff. âWell, youâre damn great at what you do.â
When you reach Jungkookâs apartment, unloading the boxes and arranging your stuff to its designated places, your heart swells in happiness as the reality sinks in that your life is heading in the right direction after months of feeling hopeless. It drives you to be more thankful to the little things, to the people who were always by your side, to your previous circumstance that although wasnât ideal was still manageable. A lot donât get to have that kind of privilege and you promise yourself that youâll make an effort to find more things to be grateful about from this day forward.
âOh, I forgot to mention,â Seowon approaches in the middle of you arranging your books on Jungkookâs near to empty shelf, âWinnie wanted to give you this. She would have handed it over herself but sheâs going to be busy for the next few days.â
You take the frame from his hand and see that itâs the picture Winnie took of you and Jungkook after the ceremony. Itâs in the restaurant that you ate at to celebrate the civil wedding. Jungkook was grinning at you with an arm around on the backrest of your chair, you were leaning towards him, smiling at the cameraâand the absolute selling point of why this was the best picture ever taken was because of how cake icing was scattered on your faces, places on spots in an artistic manner like it was planted there on purpose for the picture and not because the both of you were being silly that instance.
You think it showcases your relationship with Jungkook marvelously. Itâs playful, itâs sweet, and most of all, it demonstrates how you two are clearly great friends.
âThis is so beautiful, Seowon,â you say.
You immediately send Winnie a heartfelt thank you message for the gift and continue to take a photo of the frame, sending it to Jungkook as well.
Once you hit send, you type out a message to accompany it.
You: look how cute we look đ„č
Youâre certain itâll take hours before he replies so you keep your phone again, going back to staring at the picture which is now placed on one of the shelves. Itâs the sole picture frame you have with Jungkook. In fact, itâs the only picture that Jungkook has in his apartment, and you like to think that this might be the mark of the new beginning youâll have with him. Even though your relationship wouldnât be traditionally explored given his occupation and how heâs most likely going to be away a lot, you donât mind.
If thereâs one thing you really believe in, itâs that waiting for Jungkookâwhether consciously or unconsciouslyâalways brings out the best outcomes.
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