#IGNORE MY NEXT TAG IM OVERSHARING

[zappedbyzabka]

[cheban-png]

People dont act like people anymore

First time doin this on my puter woah, lawl. Anyways, not so fun topic that i want to put into the world but have no one to share it with--so why not on my shiny new and very public Tumblr acc?

Hi im Chebe, and i was a bit of a hermit for a couple years. Maybe it was the npd, or the adhd, or the pandemic, or the bullying, or something else but I was REALLY against the idea of making any friends for a couple years and became pretty isolated. I got to the point where i was only talking to like 3 people max that werent family for extended periods of time. fFr the last year however, ive been working, and thats really pulled me out of my shell. I made a new years resolution that id put myself out there and meet people again--and as i learn to make friends again, im remembering some of the reasons i was so opposed to it in the first place.

(This next part is situations that happened to me and extremely close friends, but for simplicity and privacy ill speak as if all the stories are my own.) One of my biggest things is that something weird and fucked up happened the second 2019 ended and everyone became absolutely insufferable. I cant even describe it but everyone around me both in school at the time and online became like. hyper sensitive but also evil at the same time. I have never seen a human so disgustingly manipulative while sugar coating their language with over/misused tone tags and faux medical speak at the same time. WHERE DID YOU PPL LEARN TO ACT LIKE THIS LMAOO. how you abliest and an ally at the same time dog. whatever thats not what this is about, that was one tiny vague example ^_^

Anyways the actual biggest thing is probably oversharing. no one gets to know each other anymore and it creates rlly weird unnatural relationships that humans arent supposed to experience. in my bios, i try to only share things you know by a first, in person interation with me. Im biracial (black/white), im trans (strictly he/him), im fat and you may call me Chebe or Angel. i even feel weird saying i have npd/adhd. im sharing because its relevent. man this is getting too long,,

an extremely common thing that happens to me is ppl STRANGERS ON THE INTERNET will send me these chunky paragraphs that follow the same format; "You/your art/your fashion inspires me so much, how do i copy this exactly?". Everythiung that makes me ME was developed over the course of my entire life??? what do you mean??? just the other day i got, "Whats ur style called??! i cant seem to find anything that 'perfectly' fits the way you are." and that was fucking horrifying. This was a stranger ive never ever seen the face/name/voice of. like can you guys even wrap your head around what an insane and invasive thing to say that is? i get shit like that ALL the time.

Dude i. im people. im human. I have lived a life and i am built up of microscopic fragments of all my experiences. im not a pinterest board or an influencer selling the ~aesthetic~ that is my life. Im a real human being and i am the way that i am because??? THATS JUST HOW I AM NATURAL:LY!!!!! i am like this becuase i LIKE being this way!!!!

and dont be ignorant, im scemo and find inspiration everywhere i go just like everyone else, but it is so deranged to dm a stranger and go "you are so amazing.... how do i clone everything that makes you unique and human"

this is NOT about gatekeeping or whatyeverthafuck i need you people to realize im SCARED and these are tiny instances in my life that make me worry about my future because some of you bitches are DOPPLEGANGERS (/silly /lh)

[ourstarscollided]

Gonna pretend I don’t see this callout. Let’s forget that I ever said that I have a WIP. I don’t have any WIPs. slowly backs away.

right so i’m picturing aged up juke, luke’s been human for a decade now

juke are happily married, have an adorable lil girl with julie’s gorgeous skin, curly dark brown hair, hazel eyes and a lil tooth gap

fun, wholesome little tidbits for you:

this lil girl thinks her mom’s name is mi amor because of how much her dad refers to her mom as such

she thinks it’s very normal to wake up to laughter ringing in her ears, as well as the sound of music always playing softly around the house

she thinks that it’s a common occurrence to have 3 godfathers, 2 godmothers and a god-dog (reggie insisted, julie and luke quickly gave up and relented)

she thinks it’s weird when her friends tell her that their parents do not, in fact, have nightly jam sessions with them, that then quickly turn into impromptu dance parties

her friends don’t have musical instruments placed in random places all over their houses???

they also have actual garages? not garages turned music studio?? it’s very weird and suspicious, she doesn’t like it

she thinks her dad’s job is only to love her mother (she hasn’t seen him do anything else - maybe serenade her with music? is that a job??? she’ll have to ask)

she sneaks downstairs one night, hoping she can grab some snacks before heading back to bed. but when she arrives downstairs she finds her parents, holding onto each other and swaying from side to side under the moonlight in the middle of the kitchen

her mom’s head is resting on her dad’s shoulder, her dad’s face hidden in her mom’s curls (ugh, how can he stand that?? she can barely stand having her own hair in her face, let alone someone else’s)

there’s no music, but she can just barely hear her dad’s voice as he sings quietly to her mom

she figures maybe she’ll just wait to come back down later to grab snacks, doesn’t want to get busted by her parents (turns out this is such a common occurrence that she’s not even phased by it)

[reyeslonestar]

Lone star better square the hell up if they think we are just gonna accept this lame ass apology from Owen. It’s not nearly enough and the real apology that TK deserves. He has probably lived with this relationship with Owen his entire life or at least majority of it and that’s so sad. He seems so used to this that he just sat back and continued on with the intervention. I know that comment still hurts TK because of how he even brought it up. They need to circle back to this because I’m genuinely wondering what it’s gonna take for Owen to actually act like a good father. Loving your kid isn’t enough- you actually have to actively try to be a good parent. As in- remember they exist even when TK isn’t hurt or something. As in, don’t twist things around and play victim. All TK does is love his dad and yeah he gets frustrated with Owen because who wouldn’t but he still is always there. Owen straight up acted like TK didn’t exist when he thought Gwyn’s baby was his. He only said he would schedule the surgery because ‘he’s gonna be a dad’. He only jumps into father mode when TK was shot and kidnapped. Every other time??? It’s like oh TK is mad at me that’s why he is being a paramedic now. Like dude have you ever stopped to think that maybe it’s not all about you? He just wanted the switch to the paramedic job because he likes it. These little moments add up and make me wanna yell at Owen FOR tk

anon, we are in agreement. god, I want to get tk by the shoulders and tell him that owen’s bullshit is absolutely not his fault and he has done way more than should have been expected of him. then id like to slap Owen upside the head and frogmarch him into therapy. very regular therapy.

you’ve brought up a lot of interesting things here so im going to stick most of my thoughts under a cut.

ultimately I think that the things that underscore the problems of TK and Owen’s relationship are Owen’s inconstancy and unreliability. I think theres a decent splash of narcissism in there too, which leads to him pressuring and gaslighting people, unloading his problems on random people, making himself the victim in any given confrontation, and also his misguided heroism stunts. but the root of him and TK having a fractured relationship comes from TK being unable to rely on Owen. (and hoo boy does that make me emotional about the fact that TK finally has someone he can completely rely on with Carlos)

so your first point:

this lame ass apology from Owen

honestly there were two weak apologies that stuck out to me - the first being the one during the intervention about Owen ‘going to be a father’ - yay, acknowledgment - but TK deserves an proper apology, one that doesn’t feel offhand, and not when Owen feels pressured by the environment. im sure im not the only one that felt that comment was disingenuous - it didnt feel at all like Owen actually felt sorry, or understood the damage he’d done. and then again in the vets - it felt pointed to me that TK had to confirm Owen was still going to go through with the surgery after buttercup turned out to be okay. he understandably doesn’t trust Owen to hold himself to his promises, even one he made in the last five minutes, and I think that reflects on how he views the apologies - if Owen can flip back and forth on promises about his own health, what’s stopping him from giving insincere apologies?

He has probably lived with this relationship with Owen his entire life or at least majority of it and that’s so sad. He seems so used to this

yeah I think you’re absolutely right - I think everything about their relationship, including TK’s anxieties about Owen’s unreliability, stem from him feeling left behind during his childhood (something I talked about a lot here - I wrote that a few months ago but I stand by a lot of it). and those anxieties really came out this ep because Owen keeps being incredibly inconstant this season. (not inconstant as in inconsistent characterisation, inconstant as in an unreliable character)

something I mentioned in some of my tags yesterday (and that I want to really dive into more specifically at some point) was the emotional labour that I suspect TK has had to shoulder in order to maintain their relationship. Owen has been this consistently absent figure, so TK has worked himself into Owen’s work life to be physically close to him, but Owen’s emotional distance has meant TK has taken up the emotional work too in order to maintain their relationship, and that has kind of allowed them both to pretend to themselves that they have a good relationship, with much more of the strain of maintaining that facade falling on TK.

Loving your kid isn’t enough- you actually have to actively try to be a good parent.

everything you said here. absolutely. loving someone does not equal having a healthy relationship with them, and TK and Owen definitely dont have that. TK is evidently so hyper aware of how much Owen has ignored him when it suits him - it kills me to see the way that comment about being a father has obviously been eating at him for weeks - and I really hate how controlling Owen gets when TK is in danger, but then is so utterly absent when TK’s in a good place, or even bitter and hostile when TK makes positive choices for himself. again, I talked about this in detail in this post - basically, Owen has major control issues and dude needs therapy.

don’t twist things around and play victim.

oh man, this shit pissed me off. like, I get that the subjects of interventions often have hostile reactions, but gaslighting Mateo after pressuring him into drinking and emotionally unloading on him? holy shit Owen, no. and making himself to be the victim of situations that have nothing to do with him, like TK becoming a paramedic or oversharing to the vet and the kid sitting on the roof. like, I understand that mental illness can lead you to taking shitty actions, but it still makes them shitty actions.

They need to circle back to this because I’m genuinely wondering what it’s gonna take for Owen to actually act like a good father.

yeah! I dont know what to think about this in the show, because knowing the way the show heroises Owen, I don’t know whether they’ll feel that they need to address it further than those pathetic apologies. that said, we’ve got Owen and this arson case next week and there does seem to be a tone that shows Owen as an idiot, and frames him as wrong for going against the rules and trying to sneak into a crime scene. if im right, then there would be scope for this to be an overall arc of Owen learning to become self aware and understand that he is not the centre of the universe. I just hope the show bothers to do that.

in the immortal words of Michelle Blake: Owen, get a therapist!

[shhh-no-ones-home]

green looks good on you  vinny mauro x reader

+++++++++

Request from @gardenjungle : "If you are taking requests, I would LOVE if you could do an imagine where the reader has a ton in common with Chris (likes hockey and Harry Potter, is a vegan, etc...) so they’re super close, and Vinny is super upset about it because he likes her sooo much and “Chris gets all the girls” ??? Vinny gets no love and you’re one of the only people who writes about him often. I’d also love if you could get a little sexy action in there"

Ngl this is like 1600+ words and i wrote it in like twenty minutes and loved every minute of it. i really hope you like it! i didnt end up adding anything ‘sexy’ but its pretty gratifying to say the least lol.

Song: gold by sleeping with sirens

tag list: @musicsexandpizza69 @svintsandghosts @alilpunkrock @cynic-spirit @theoneandonlykymberlee @ryansitkowskiswifey @joeybarber @thisplace-ishaunted

+++++++++

i rocked back into the couch, laughing at what chris had said. he was sat next to me, very comfortably, as we chatted amongst ourselves. we had been very close friends for a very long time and i was over the moon that he'd invited me to travel with them for this tour as the videographer. not only did i get to expand my portfolio but i also got to connect with my best friend and his band.

"okay but do you remember that one fall at the orchard when you tripped on that apple and ended up face first in the dirt?"

he laughed out and i sent him a shocked expression.

"i thought we agreed to never bring that up!"

i protested, the other guys around us sort of laughing along, them only half paying attention as they played a new video game. their focus was above our heads.

"but it was hilarious. i looked up for a split second and BAM! there you went."

he said loudly, being a little more expressive at the 'bam.' i shook my head at him.

"okay then, if we are ratting each other out about stupid shit weve done,what about that one time you got your hand stuck in the Christmas tree ties on your dads car?"

i said matter-of-factly. his eyes got wide.

"hey! that was an accident and you know it. we couldve taken my whole arm off!"

he said in his defense.

"i thought it was hilarious."

i said sternly back, smiling widely at him. he stuck his tongue out at me, a notion i gladly mirrored. then he grabbed me around the shoulders, pulling me to him. i screamed at the sudden motion, looking to vinny and rick who were sitting across from us for some guidance but they were to into the game.

"you two are too much."

ricky laughed out, looking at ryan for a second as he walked by. chris pulled me closer before licking a stripe up my face.

"ew!"

i said pulling away from him and wiping his saliva off of my face.

"asshole!"

i said, grabbing his face and blowing raspberries into his cheek. he laughed incredulously, pushing me away from him.

"youre nasty."

he said mimicking my notion and wiping his face. i punched his arm lightly before swinging my legs into his lap, him holding them there and looking down at me endearingly.

"so are you."

i said back, shaking my head at him, nose scrunched.

"you know you love me."

he said, bringing his face closer to mine.

"well yeah."

i said back, squinting at him.

"i think im done for tonight."

vinny said suddenly, pausing the game. ricky sent him a look like 'wtf?' and watched him stand.

"im gonna go get some air."

he said and we all watched him walk off the bus.

"that was weird right?"

i asked and they all nodded. i had a good few chances to talk to vinny since tour had started and he seemed like a really cool guy. someone id be lucky to call a close friend by the time tour was over if not something more. part of me felt bad, like chris and i really where too much for him to handle in that moment. but this was how we always were. we practically survived our teens years together, losing touch for a bit but inevitably going back to the way things where when we found each other back.

"you guys mind if i go out there too?"

i asked and they all sort of shrugged at me, chris letting my legs go so i could stand. as i did i leaned down and kissed the top of his head.

"dont miss me while im gone."

i joked and he rolled his eyes at me.

"of course not."

i laughed a little bit as i descended down the stairs, pushing the door open and seeing vinny leaning against the bus.

"you okay?"

i asked softly, walking to him and rubbing my hands together. i had sort of forgotten how cold it had got. it was late fall after all but the bus was so warm and inviting i didnt even think about grabbing a jacket before leaving. i half shivered as i walked closer, his face being illuminated by the street lights outside the venue.

"uh yeah, everything's great."

he said a little condescendingly, kicking his foot into the gravel under him.

"im sorry if we were too much, i guess when we get together we have a tendency to overshare and its not for everyone. but i suppose thats what you get when youre comfortable with someone the way we are."

i tried to defend to him and he let out a short sigh-laugh.

"its no big deal, you guys really like each other. its cool."

i smiled.

"yeah, hes my best friend."

vinny nodded once.

"how long have you guys been together? i dont recall him ever talking about you before."

i drew my brows.

"together?"

i asked and he seemed just as confused as i was.

"look i get it, chris gets all the girls, being the front man and all."

he seemed a little jealous.

"but i dont think he ever mentioned you before tour started and then one day he told us about some girl coming on to film us. but clearly you guys are close so do you have like a, i dont know, like a open relationship type thing?"

i laughed a little bit.

"you think chris and i are dating?"

he half shrugged.

"well yeah, its kinda obvious."

i shook my head and took his hand in mine.

"vinny i can assure you that chris and i are just friends. if anything hes like the brother i never asked for nor wanted but got anyways. but life just does that sometimes."

he looked down at our connected hands and let go of me promptly.

"i guess it just doesnt seem like that."

he said a little hurt. i sighed and leaned against the bus next to him.

"it would be kind of weird to bring it up to him but i like someone else in this band, if you wanted to know."

i said, looking at him a little hopeful he was picking up what i was putting down.

"oh."

he said sadly. i sighed, i guess not.

"yeah, hes super cool, and nice, and ive really enjoyed connecting with him."

i shivered as the wind blew and he finally looked over at me.

"are you cold?"

he asked, ignoring what i had just said. i nodded a little bit, crossing my arms over my chest.

"just a little bit but i ll be fine."

he shook his head at me.

"no way, here."

he said taking his jacket off. at least he had long sleeves on. he placed his jacket over my shoulders, pulling it together in the front.

"thanks vin."

i said as we both returned to our positions against the bus.

"would your new dream guy do that?"

he half joked, i could still hear the venom in his voice. he was absolutely jealous. i thought it was funny because now he was jealous of himself.

"actually yeah."

he scoffed, hiking his foot up on the side of the bus.

"great."

he said looking away from me. i stepped closer and nudged him.

"he would because he just did."

he looked at me and drew his brows together.

"wait you mean?"

he asked, his face turning to that of shock. i nodded.

"god, yes. vin ive had a crush on you since i got here."

i laughed out.

"i didnt think you would like me back and then i realized just now that that was utter bullshit."

he half smiled.

"and whys that?"

he asked a little cocky.

"you were jealous of chris and that has only happened to me a handful of times in my life. once in highschool when my boyfriend said he would break up with me if i didnt stop hanging out with him. once when i graduated college and my then boyfriend accused me of sleeping with him. and right now."

he looked down a little ashamed.

"yeah i guess that wasnt fair of me to do. i just figured since you guys hit it off so fast that you were into him."

i laughed a little bit.

"dont get me wrong i love him with my whole being, but seeing someone go through puberty just does something to your vision of them ya know?"

i asked and he laughed back, nodding.

"okay, well if you really are into me, would it be stepping to far to ask you out?"

he said hopefully and i grinned widely at him.

"i would love that vin."

he sent me a tired smile in the dim street lights.

"may i also be so bold as to ask if i could kiss you?"

i let out a nervous laugh. i was really gonna let that happen huh? i nodded.

"id like that a lot vin."

he stepped closer to me slowly, placing his hand gently against my cheek, running his thumb over it. his hands were rough and calloused from playing the drums so long but i didnt mind. it kind of felt nice. he looked deep into my eyes before leaning down and capturing my lips in his. all of a sudden it felt like home, like this was it, the thing id wanted for so long and never found. his other hand made its way to my waist as he deepend the kiss. i sighed into him, practically melting against his mouth like chocolate left outside in the sun on a hot day. when he pulled away he rested his forehead against mine and smiled like an idiot, one i gladly returned.

"fucking finally."

i heard from behind me, the bus door clicking closed. both of us turned to look, seeing ricky and chris standing there grinning from ear to ear. i had a mad blush splayed across my face now and was thankful that the light was behind me so it would be harder to see.

"how long have you been standing there?"

i demanded, walking to chris and punching his arm. he laughed in pain as he rubbed his arm.

"long enough to see the sparks fly."

he teased, pushing me back. i rolled my eyes at him.

"get your ass back in the bus."

i said opening the door and escorting him back inside. he made kissy noises at me as rick followed him up the stairs. i shook my head and turned around, jumping a little bit at vinnys presence behind me.

"rick had kind of been waiting for that for a while."

he said, looking up at the now closed door. i raised a a brow.

"oh?"

i asked and he sent me a bashful smile, scratching the back of his neck lightly.

"ive been crushing over you for a while too. and being jealous of chris just as long, rick's been pushing me to say something. i guess it just took one last little push."

he shamefully laughed out.

"at least now we're on the same page."

i said before standing on my tip toes and bringing him down to kiss me again, both of his hands going to my waist.

"now come on, im still cold and the bus is much warmer."

i joked and he nodded along.

"agreed."

[bonerattled]

writer asks: blue, yellow, grey, pink, brown, gold, clear (sorry this is like half of them i'm just curious and also ily ok byeee)

why would u ever apologize for fulfilling my hunger for Attention and Oversharing (ily 2!!!!!!!)

Blue: What’s more important to you: characters or plot?

lich rally what is a plot  <3 it always starts w characters and i simply ride their coattails into something coherent like riding into the sunset on a horse. all my writing always starts with fleshing out characters and finding out the doors and the windows and the stiff brick walls of their interactions w all the other characters.

Yellow: What’s a common writing tip that you mostly ignore?

to not overuse metaphors. fuck that next you’ll tell me to not overuse oxygen luv xx

Grey: What’s a common writing tip that you almost always follow?

to not fear the word “said/says” as a dialogue tag. 

Pink: Which of your characters would become your best friend?

god most of them piss me off i would Fight cooper on sight likely. max would only Enable me and i rly dont need that. flip would hurt my feelings and i would hurt jamie’s. lou would b rly fun tbh but also i simply cannot be Perceived the way they’d Perceive me on sight. hank would be nice 2 get coffee w but hes too passive 4 me id give an opinion and he’d just nod (caringly, from a place of caring deeply) but i want more than that i want a DEBATE. ramsey would b perfect comfort without Exposing me and would only put up w half my shenanigans and pull the brakes at just the right time before i rolled down a dangerous hill into stupidity. also maddox (from wtdss) is ultimate best friend. why did i just write an essay. ramsey and maddox final answer 

Brown: Do you have a set writing space? Or do you write everywhere?

i mean i usually have a Space for a while but changing that space is usually what helps me w writing block like if im in a new environment after a while of one environment it makes my brain buzz better. i will ALWAYS write in an upright chair i cannot write in bed or anything that feels like relaxation. hsfdsjgdghkds

Gold: Do your stories usually contain lessons or morals?

I think lessons. they r more bendy than morals. i dont know if that makes sense

Clear: Do your characters control where the story goes or do you maintain control?

i have never had control of a book in my LIFE my characters drive the car and i am simply the wheezing engine under the hood

ASK ME GET-TO-KNOW-THE-WRITER ASKS <3

[feraldavestrider]

i never check my mentions apparently @alpacalmond and @uiyutrentasei tagged me in a GTKM thing so im gonna do it oh uhhhh 2 weeks later LOL because i cant sleep and i hate myself

i tag @hal-strider if they didnt do it? and @noctiilucent, @kiyumiarashi, @whimsicmimic and @ataliaf uwu and anyone else who wants to do it!!

how tall are you: this is a cryptid question. i get a different result every time i try to measure myself and ive never asked anyone else to do it for me. some people tell me im very short, others have told me im average height for someone who is afab. im gonna hazard a guess at 5′5 tho.

what colour are your eyes: very dark brown

do you wear contacts and/or glasses: glasses. i literally CANNOT see without them. i mean like 2 inches from my glasses-less face is so blurry its unbelievable. i get super triggered by eye stuff tho so contacts are a no go ALSO i look weird w/o glasses anyway.

do you wear braces: no my teeth r p good actually. one is a bit wonky but thats life

what is your fashion style: i mean 90% panties and a sweaty 4 day tshirt because i just spend all day in my room like a goblin. BUT when i actually go out im ur basic ass post-emo trans dude with skinny jeans, converse and a too-big graphic tee. sometimes i spice it up with a plaid shirt because im fuckin GAY.

when were you born: october 12th 1999, babey

how old are you: 18 motherfucker flashes my titties and gulps a bottle of vodka im an ADULT

do you have any siblings: yes. a younger brother and hes a cunt

what school/college do you go to: im at sixth form rn (last yr of highschool technically if ur american but im not and hs finishes at 16 yrs old here deal with it). im going uni next yr tho and this years almost over for me academically since we go on study leave soon for our final exams. uwu overshares

what kind of student are you: the asshole who never studies for tests and does homework at 5am the morning before and still manages to pull straight As to everyones anger. im also the adhd class clown who makes random noises and cant concentrate half the time. ik i hate myself too im so annoying irl even more so than online.

what are your favorite subjects: in terms of actual content of the subject, english lit fs. in terms of classmates/teachers/general atmosphere DEFFO drama we spend half of our time eating cake, singing random shit and just losing our minds while filming it on snapchat which shouldnt at all be allowed.

what are your favorite movies: god idek. um. fuck. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA i cant think of a single movie. ok ok ok i got it: white chicks, premium rush, scott pilgrim vs the world, the cornetto triology too i just love edgar hes such a great director. i like a lot of the marvel movies esp the spiderman hc and thor ragnorok and both gotg were p good. i love a lot of movies my brains just a void that sucks memories up into its fat gob and steals them from me forever.

what are your pastimes: sleeping, crying, used to be rping but i gave up on that, playing overwatch way too much and getting tilted because im shit, reading fanfictions did i say sleeping

do you have many regrets: dude. my guy. come in close. let me whisper in ur ear. are you close? no, closer. ok. 

YES

what is your dream job: whoo boy. im do indecisive and i think a LOT of jobs seem super cool that id never do i.e. be an actor or be in a band. my dream job since i was like 8 was to be a writer which is unlikely since i cant even finish a pwp oneshot. but thatd be cool. id also like to write plays and direct them but thats also wild and v dream > reality. 

would you like to get married: honestly. marriage as an institution? angers me. i dont like a lot of things about it. BUT. part of the reason i hate it is honestly if ur in a long long term relationship with someone ur better off married than not in terms of the benefits so. id happily get married if the other person wanted and/or we felt like it was the right thing to do, i just dont really care about being married or having a wedding tbh.

do you want kids? how many if so: no. hard pass. i might adopt if im long-term with someone who SUPER wants kids but that likely wont happen because i dont want to get into a long-term relationship with someone so desperate for kids since i dont have that same enthusiasm. sorry. ill be ur uncle gabe but im not having my own children im just not well equipped to literally have a full time job of making sure little idiots (meant affectionately) who dont know fuck from shit dont just straight up die. i can barely do that for myself.

how many countries have you visited: shit dude actually ive only visited like... uh... 4??? a lot of my holidays tend to be to the same countries (portugal/america) so i dont have that much experience like i feel like i do.

what was your scariest dream: hmmmm. when i was a kid i had these recurring dreams where i worked at this like. “zoo” where these MASSIVE, i mean ABSOLUTELY MASSIVE string rays that were also pancakes were like. hooked up to make electricity? anyway i hated the job because we all abused the rays super bad to make them generate the power and it sucked and it was all dystopian. there was stuff where like we had to kill the baby rays and stuff. anyway one day it went all planet of the apes and they broke out somehow and could fly and they killed loads of people and i had to go into hiding because they were super clever and could id who had worked at the zoo plant and wanted revenge. its super weird ik but this is pretty tame for my dreams they go HARD and BIZARRE and this one always made me wake up feeling super sick and scared idk. ur welcome.

do you have a boyfriend/girlfriend/significant other: no im lonely but its ok because i need to work on me 

put your playlist on shuffle and without skipping the first 15 songs: ok so i dont really have a “playlist” per se so im just gonna use my top 100 2017 songs on spotify which ignores a lot of my non-spotify non-2017 bangers but whatever.

1) ‘My Songs Know What You Did In The Dark’ by FOB

2) ‘Tuxford Fall’ - Vasudeva

3) ‘Our Lawyer Made Us Change The Name Of This Song So We Wouldn’t Get Sued’ - FOB

4) ‘Fried Noodles: Getter Remix’ - Pink Guy, Getter (listen ive never watched any filthy frank he weirds me out but this is a banger)

5) ‘Brick By Boring Brick’ - Paramore

6) ‘Thnks Fr Th Mmrs’ - FOB (i really dont listen to this much fob this is crazy)

7) ‘Death Note L’s Theme Goes Metal’ - Charlie Parra del Riego (theres no defence for this)

8) ‘Turnstile’ - Vasudeva

9) ‘Idle Worship’ - Paramore

10) ‘Monster’ - Paramore

11) ‘Miss Missing You’ - FOB

12) ‘The City’ - Madeon

13) ‘Far Too Young To Die’ - P!ATD

14) ‘Don’t Stop’ - Nothing More (really this is the band i listen to much smh these results are so skewed)

15) ‘Smile Like You Mean It’ - The Killers